#leaving the worst until last
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No matter which textile craft you look at, it has weaving in ends, and everyone hates it with a burning passion.
#crafting#textile#art#sewing#quilting#tatting#lace#embroidery#cross stitch#tufting#knitting#crocheting#weaving#nalbinding#weaving in ends#working in ends#finishing as you go#leaving the worst until last#no one is gonna see that#let's just leave it#if you judge the back of my work we can't be friends#tablet weaving#brocade#heddle loom#felting and spinning might be safe but I can't be sure#the evil that cannot be defeated
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ur favorite employee :3
#late for maid day...i actually didnt know until yesterday. and normally its wtv to me but i saw so much cute art... iwas inspired...#asmo wld be the worst cafe employee. shows up an hour after hte shift starts. 45 minutes offtask flirting with customers. 30 minutes preeni#ng in the mirror. leaves shift whenever he feels like it . but hed prob bring major customers in.... SM TIPS....he wld make a good host ...#i got tendonitis?last month in my wrist but i hope to draw more asmo once its normal :3#i think abt asmotoni every day...my favs foreve...#asmodeus obey me#asmo#mine
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i mean is it really a kdrama if there isn't a horrible mom who suddenly gets "redeemed" without a proper redemption arc
#and the redemption scene is always during a food scene too#anyway this happens in too many dramas i hate it more than random serial killers in a romcom#like it is literally the Worst because usually she doesn't get ''redeemed'' until the last episode#like are we all supposed to forgive and forget after watching them be horrible to their kids for eight weeks#anyway queen of tears you still have time to do it properly please don't leave it at that 🙏#Queen of Tears#queen of tears spoilers
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Some important stuff in regards to the harassment of developers came from Bungie today. They won a lawsuit against a guy who repeatedly harassed a community manager and his family (not fully confirmed in the official document, but people are fairly certain this is about A_dmg and his family). This is a twitter thread from the lawyer who went into some details about the situation. The court document is also available to read (featuring some of the horrific harassment tactics that were motivated by racism and also used racism as part of the harassment so be advised if you want to read).
This isn't just a win for the individual community manager and Bungie, but also has potential to set a bigger precedent in the future. It's basically the first time this has been done to this extent and some ruling in this case made it clear that companies can pursue this sort of legal action in the future if their employees are harassed and threatened. This is HUGE because the protection of employees in the gaming industry has been abysmal otherwise. This case will allow for the company to file a lawsuit on behalf of their employees in cases of harassment.
Before I add some of the more heinous stuff about this situation below, I want to say that the majority of reactions to this are positive. People are happy that this happened as it did and a lot of people are excited about potential big influence this will have in the future to combatting harassment of this type in the gaming industry.
Extra details and thoughts below (racism tw):
This started because the community manager highlighted a black content creator, Uhmayyze, who is himself a victim of harassment more often than not (usually of racist nature). He is most often harassed because he is unapologetically positive for which people have continuously sent him awful shit and comments. Because he enjoys the game and isn't jumping on the hate train. Just recently he commended Bungie for a ban wave and had hundreds of people hound him on twitter for his comment, including Gladd who started it by specifically replying to Uhmayyze and putting him on blast (warning for a lot of gross comments, including photoshopped screenshots of fake discord texts to make Uhmayyze look bigoted, nsfw images, r slur, suicide baiting and so on). This is important because the incident of real life harassment was fuelled over a community manager highlighting a content creator that is himself being harassed and despised online for the crime of... being positive. And you know, for being black. This situation isn't an isolated incident. The community, including other content creators, are absolutely horrible towards this one person that they feel, I guess, does not follow the content creator NPC questline of hating Bungie and Destiny.
So of course, at some point, someone from that crowd will feel confident and justified taking things further. How dare Bungie promote this person they hate. How dare they focus on a positive creator. They're clearly biased and don't want to listen to criticism, only to "toxic positivity" streamer. How dare a community manager highlight this creator. It's a personal slight to them, and "proof" that Bungie is bad and evil and "ignoring criticism." There's someone out there (and probably not the only one) that hates this creator and the game so much they were willing to harass and threaten a community manager and his family in real life.
The community manager was first harassed by phone with text messages and voice mails featuring racist bile, including apparently a voice mail telling him to "convince Bungie to create options in its game in which only persons of color would be killed." This is the worst part for me and super concerning in general, as well as showing the dedication of this person to racism, motivated by his hatred of a black creator (which also, by proxy, technically makes the streamer being harassed as well). Absolutely ghoulish behaviour.
This escalated to also harassing the CM's wife and resulted in doxing them; the harasser somehow found their address. Most of the reports on this will say that the asshole "sent them pizza" which doesn't truly capture how horrific the incident was. First, it's a random guy who has your address which is concerning enough given that he harasses you by phone already. Apparently the pizza was made to be "inedible" and the delivery was instructed to bang loudly on the door upon arrival to maximise discomfort. The order was also deliberately made to be paid on delivery to create as much pain for the victims as possible. The harasser also kept track of the delivery and then called the family again when it was done to tell them to "enjoy the pizza." The family immediately contacted Bungie who contacted the police and provided the family with protection. There's no telling how this would've escalated had they not been in the position to call Bungie and had Bungie not reacted to them asking for help. It's absolutely crucial here that Bungie is the type of a company willing to immediately assist in this situation.
Immediately following that, Bungie organised a long and expensive manhunt to identify the harasser and bring them court. That's where most of the expenses went; finding the culprit and protecting the employee and his family. This is the money Bungie earned back by this court decision because they could prove that the expenses were caused by a person harassing and threatening their employee.
This is a big win overall for the whole industry. It's Bungie setting a precedent on how a company should protect its employees. No matter what people think about Bungie or big corporations or whatever, this is how you can use a lot of money and power to make sure that your workers have rights to decency and safety. That's huge for the rights of workers and worker protections. I hope it becomes a standard and that any future harassment is prevented altogether or at least punished accordingly.
Naturally, the commentary on the news from a big part of the community is super positive. Unfortunately, there's also a part of the community that has a lot of really awful shit to say about this. The comments on twitter are littered with people who are using THIS specific moment to yell about Bungie being a greedy corporation, how the money they won should be used to "fix the servers" and "make more pvp maps" or how Bungie will greedily put this money "into Eververse" or "into Marathon." There's comments about how time was uselessly spent protecting an employee who should expect harassment anyway, instead of working on "fixing the game."
This is what I mean when I talk about how impossible it is in the current situation to have a meaningful discussion about any sort of criticism or feedback. There's thousands of comments from people who think that this specific instance shows how Bungie is greedy. This is what I mean when I say that none of these people actually understand what they're talking about. You can't make proper criticism when you can't separate game development with a company's legal effort to stop an escalating harassment campaign of an employee. The majority of gamers are simply not fit to offer any criticism or feedback. The idea that we all have something useful to say and that employees at Bungie are obliged to give us their time of the day is simply incorrect.
I genuinely 100% stand by the claim that the recent barrage of content creators promoting the idea that Bungie is "the greediest company in the world that's scamming players and increasing costs out of greed" as well as the idea that Bungie is "abandoning Destiny for Marathon, isn't working on the game anymore and is deliberately ruining it" is the reason for these comments existing. If a big streamer said that Bungie is getting too much money but also not doing anything "good" with it, then any money that Bungie receives (including compensation for expenses they took to protect an employee from active harm) is a result of greed. The nuance of any situation is lost; when you only learn the mantra of "company has money therefore company bad" you WILL end up causing harm for people and you will most definitely not be an advocate of workers rights. That's where we're at right now.
The dehumanisation of people who work at Bungie (and the harassment itself) is a consequence of this crap and other similar crap that's been thrown into the ether for the past year, disguised as "we're just offering feedback." People heard that Bungie is a "microtransaction hell" and that Bungie is only investing in Eververse and Marathon and they feel like this story reflects that; they feel like an employee being harassed is not deserving of proper condemnation and that this isn't important enough and that Bungie is a greedy corpo anyway so who cares about that. They do not understand how companies work, how games are made, the state of the industry as a whole (or the world as a whole), the treatment of employees or workers' rights, and you cannot meaningfully critique a company's business practices without understanding that. And they don't because they think that legal expenses used to protect victims, finding a culprit and bringing their ass to court is money that is being used for game development and that Bungie receiving this money should result in... new pvp maps or "fixed servers."
And there's even seemingly good commentary where people recognise how this is good, but they initiate the comment with "As much as I hate Bungie and Destiny and I think they're awful and greedy and destroying gaming as a whole..." : that's not the time and place. You don't have to excuse your support of a big win for potential new employee protection policies just because those policies are done by a company. Of course it is. Companies are the only ones capable of pursuing this sort of legal action. It's one good way a big company can put their power and money into a good place to actually help people and bring forth positive change. And like, you don't have to tell us how much you despise Bungie before you're "allowed" to admit that this is good news. Sometimes companies do good stuff. It's literally not that complicated.
I hope that this situation will help other employees demand the same protection, that other companies will follow suit and that this will also make potential other harassers rethink whether or not they will engage in this or similar type of behaviour. In the meantime, know that the community is largely positive about this, but that there are still absolutely detestable human beings who should feel ashamed of their reaction to this. They shouldn't feel welcome here. And there's still people doing this to the devs and I hope Bungie takes their asses to court too.
#destiny 2#bungie#long post#this was a lot and i'm glad it had a happy ending#reading some of the comments unfortunately added to my depression tenfold#as usual the best thing to do if you feel strongly against a content creator or a video game is to leave#simply leaving would've stopped this whole thing#it's why that's my go to response to people who feel super strongly about how bungie is the worst#bro if bungie is the worst thing ever then your feedback will NOT change shit and you gotta go do something else#like if you still enjoy the game and have some criticism that's fine! i do too!#but if your entire online personality is criticism of bungie you gotta rethink your priorities#before you turn into this guy who will owe bungie 500k until the rest of his life#especially if you're a creator with a reach of tens of thousands of people or more. you gotta be careful with what you say#because your words WILL entice this behaviour. there is someone in your audience who will go too far#anyway. wanted this off my chest this whole situation has been super fucked up#and the brunt of it started around the time criticism started getting really bad last year#end of haunted-start of plunder + lightfall showcase which had massive harassment of trans employees online#we have not known peace since then and neither have bungie employees apparently#genuinely disheartening that people can act this way about a video game
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JRWI PD S2 EP16 SPOILERS
au where dakota implied he was willing to sacrifice himself to be a vessel for the trickster, like he did in the sovereign five meeting hall. him offering his life if it meant saving ashe. and the trickster actually going “bet” and posessing him. that mixed with dakota’s powers. btw
#vixen rambles#jrwi pd#jrwi pd spoilers#i need to write this so bad#the worst part is that it’s actually canon up until the last two sentences simply bc the trickster refused to leave
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2 weeks out, Galvin finished the MSQ! Besties in midriff unlocked:
#ffxiv#endwalker spoilers#awful rabbit#you would not believe how bad I am at BLM all over again on controller#I knew I was going to have to suck it up and do this or I'd abandon BLM until last for levelling on Frog in DT#and leave Galvin rotting#the worst part is now I know how to play really well so occasionally Galvin in shit gear is top DPS in a trial#and then 10 seconds later he's a smear on the floor :P#we'll get there#I am resolved to play enough to at least get him geared up for BLM#so I have no excuses
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I said Knives never tortured anyone in Trimax but I lied he did turn Legato into a pretzel
#trigun#millions knives#honestly it's almost unfair how little Knives fears Legato when he is ultimately the one person that could probably have killed him#or maybe he does maybe that's why#almost ironic how Knives is betrayed by every single person he knows EXCEPT Legato and Elendira#Humanity in general; Rem choose humans; Vash shoots him in the back; Conrad plotted against him#pretty sure he doesn't really know most of the gung hoes and they're more Legato's gang but Wolfwood tries to shoot and then betrays him#Midvalley tries to kill Legato and get away. Livio/Razzlo switches sides. Zazie tries to put a disgusting mind control worm inside him.#All plants on the planet drops him and leaves him powerless and burning to death#In the end he is completely alone and not until then does he admit it. That he had been alone all along and he only has himself to blame#Because he's the one that walked away. Who turned down Vash's offer of running from it all. Who turned everyone against him.#Because he became obsessed with making sure no one could ever hurt him again and refused to let anyone close but it kept happening#because you can't be hurt if you already expect the worst right#and then Vash is there and Vash- Vash chooses NOT to do the thing he expects - he doesn't close the last bleeding wound in his chest that#Knives couldn't - wouldn't - get rid off. It would have been the last nail in the coffin that were Knives stubborn hope that he wasnt alone#and then Vash throws away the hammer and rips open the lid of the coffin and protects him instead - after Knives had betrayed HIM#and Vash should leave him; should kill him; should confirm that Knives is beyond hope so he can die feeling validated in his pain#but he doesn't. he doesn't he doesn't he doesn't#because Vash doesn't believe anyone is beyond repair; least of all people ruled by fear#and Legato tried. he tried so hard to be that person for Knives.#aaah. just me being normal about mr millions again.
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..
#ive been very lucky in that the last family member i remember passing away was when i was like 6#like i’ve never really known any of them since#but my cat is dying from a really aggressive form of cancer#and probably only has a month at most#and now i’m having to go through this with my best friend#we got her right before christmas in 2015#or maybe 14#because our cat went missing and a man reached out thinking she was her#and she very clearly wasn’t#but the guy couldn’t take care of her so we took her home because we could#and she’s been my best friend basically since then#she’s always been there for me through the worst years of my life#she’s never left my side#when we took her home that first day she peed on me in the car lol#she still doesn’t like leaving the house#even though she used to beg outside of a gas station before us#and last night on the way to the hospital she peed on me again#so i guess it’s full circle in that way lol#idk what to do#we can’t see her until tomorrow#so i just have to sit here and act like my best friend isn’t dying#delete later#yap yap yapping#you don’t need to reach out or respond or anything i just. need to vent and i’ve exhausted everywhere else and i feel bad messaging friends
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Interesting how one week with a disrespectful, lazy, stupid, rude, know it all coworker who's 5 years younger than me and doesn't know shit but somehow got in through nepotism can make my blood boil so hard I threw up three times in the past two days and got ulcers, yet while I was working as a bartender and had to deal with rude drunkards who overstepped boundaries and had to be escorted out by security or had the police called on them, I was pretty chill about it and got over it shortly after
#idk if i mentioned it but at the last concert some brazilian dude was hitting on me and wouldn't leave me alone#until an older guy my friend and i were hanging out with for some of the night pretended to be my husband bc he was so pushy and creepy#and i mean the bartender asked if i'm alright but he was already leaving by then so i was like yeah and partied on like whatever#this bar is a safe place tbh especially in comparison to other clubs around here where nobody gaf if you seriously need help#and obviously when customers were being dicks to me i was annoyed for a bit but forgot a few minutes later but this guy? worst person i know#in other news i drank half a bottle of amaretto and a beer and i'll absolutely have more tomorrow#and i'll be aggressively playing guitar and singing to calm myself down which is. good? that i'm practicing again but 😭😭#9 hours breakdown and counting (excluding this morning before i was in an okay mood for an hour because i got pizza)#mel talks
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my parents aren't abusive in any way, but living with them is like... letting your kid cousin play with a prized collection, gritting your teeth and hoping for them to be done with it soon, knowing any second something could be broken, and anyway you'll have to put the whole thing back together right afterwards. and like the kid cousin, you gotta not necessarily keep an eye on them, but always be on call, thinking about WHAT the kid might be doing and WHERE they are, so you don't make them feel too unsuported or unheard
#i genuinely don't think it's even BAD parenting i think i just started snowballing into really long-term issues very young#and what is a parent to do in this situation with a kid that can't express things clearly with limited time with so many factors#so here i am. to the stage where i'm worsening my own problems all by myself#cuz yknow they didn't tell me DO THIS AND THIS AND THIS like last month or anything#but they do have repeatedly told me in the moments and in retrospect at various ages#that what i was doing was weird and incomprehensible and ''abnormal for that age''#and now i have the obsessive need to repay even a little bit of the infinitely deep pit of what i owe to them#i should spend time with them i should eat with them i should never cost them anything and repay the debt as soon as i can#i should go places with them and follow them and follow them and follow their pace of life#i should be there all the time and also leave them alone whenever they want and i should guess when they want to be together or alone#and nothing will happen if i don't! nothing! they will do nothing! nothing bad!#but i feel like i should fucking slit my throat if i don't!#every second i live with them i keep digging my debt and being the worst child there's ever been#if i were to live apart every second would be the EXACT SAME except even more expensive#i'm so close to just asking my mom if i can sort of squat grandma's flat until it's emptied#but like. like. what's even the point. what even is the point of a symbolic distance of One Kilometer#that's fucking selfish and stupid to even entertain the possibility#but like at least i think i could work more#and better#i should've fucking gone through with it this summer#broadcasting my misery#vent
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i don’t understand ppl who leave their packing, until the last minute. i am already packing and i don’t go anywhere for over a week, imao
#*walter white voice* jesse we need to pack#imao i’m watching brba and thinking about packing at 2am#i actually haven’t started packing but i’m gonna pack all my clothes and just leave everything else until the day before#bc a lot of stuff i still need in the meantime#i also need to put pins on my jacket but that’s a separate thing that i keep forgetting to do#bc i think a lot of my best pins would be better on my jacket#i actually need to work out which clothes i’m wearing#like which ones to pack and which ones i’m wearing on the drive#i’m planning on probably just wearing sweats and a regular ass shirt#and i’ll dress up when i’m actually there#and i gotta make sure i have my meds all sorted#and i need to make sure i don’t forget anything and that i keep everything safe#this post is kinda just me talking to myself imao#but honestly they usually are#okay but like someone tell me to not to pack at 2am bc i can literally do it tomorrow during the day but my brain is like ‘pack now!!’#bc i have it stuck in my head#imao i’m also only going for three days but travelling is a whole thing with me#leaving the house in general is a whole thing with me#what may seem like nothing to some people is a huge deal to me#like wow you’re going on vacation for three days? so what?#but this is only the second time i’ve done this#and the longest i’ll have been away from home aside from when i was in the hospital#so yeah it’s a big deal#the worst part is the travel tho#when i’m actually there i’ll have a fun time bc i did last time#well kinda i also got homesick and was in the middle of a depressive episode but i digress#but this time i’m not! so go me!#gwen actually leaves the house and feels good about it for once!#gwen rambles#gwenposting
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saw you post 'listen before you go', thought you'd enjoy this:
oh...
#sterechats :)#going through It. and by It let's just say. the worst loss of my life lol#but I don't think anyone wants to hear how I ruined it again#and how badly I miss them#and if they'd give me one more chance I'd be the happiest person in the world#they put up with so much shit I should never have put them through#I can't blame them for leaving I just wish I could show them how much they mean to me#that behind all of my masks and my anger I cared about them more than anything#and I'm just so damn scared of being vulnerable because I've learned vulnerability is weakness#and even though that's wrong and I know it is it's less vulnerable to close myself off and respond with rage#than it is to actually confront my own emotions and realize that I'm not a robot#that I have feelings and they're usually really big and overwhelming for me#and I have to step back and process these things on my own because it's unfair to others#because I can't keep treating my friends like they're responsible for my emotions and at fault for them#because I need to actually communicate my needs instead of assuming people know them#because these same patterns are why I keep losing friends over and over again#and if I don't fix them I'm never going to be able to maintain a friendship#god. if they're ever going to read this I hope they know how much they mean to me#and how deeply and truly sorry I am for everything I've done#and how I never want to hurt them ever again#and I'm crying again. it feels like all I'm ever doing recently is crying#you know that saying 'you don't realize what you have until it's gone'? yeah.#for all the shit I talked I'd do anything to hear them tell me about their f1 drivers again#I miss them so much it's killing me it feels like#I just. I don't think they're coming back#no matter how much I tell myself they just need a few weeks or months#I think I really fucked it up this time and I don't want to admit it to myself#because I don't think I can mentally accept that they're gone forever most likely#I just want to hope that they'll give me that one last chance and I can prove myself#I just want to talk to them again and it hurts so much
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Remind me to never make events in my fic happen on certain dates again.
#Was Born To Lead#I almost died calculating all this stuff#Okay it wasn’t that hard but certainly unpleasant#It all started with Gabe’s birthday that takes place on the fourth of January and it’s freaking Wednesday#And Valerio had to return from Nueva Vista on Monday so I had to calculate the date for it too#and then every next chapter takes place on the next day#But then I just HAD to specify that Ángel applies to the fencing school on Monday#Why would I do that#And then Frida leaves on Saturday#But this is not the worst thing#The worst thing was to decide when to make Gabe’s scout camp start#Because if I made it on Monday it would be the 30th of January and it would suck because I want this camp to start in February#And it would also suck because I said Valerio was staying in Nueva Vista until the fourteenth of February#when Gabe already returned from the camp which is bad because the next chapter is supposed to have two parallel arcs again#so be prepared for it being extremely long#Anyway eventually I made the camp start on the first of February which is Wednesday#The 30th of January is the first day of the winter break in Gabe’s school#and the camp lasts for two weeks so the break ends on the 20th of February#It’s three whole weeks! Avaloran kids are blessed#I had no idea it would turn out like that but yeah now Avaloran schools have a three week long break in winter#What having everything planned even is#Плывём по течению детка#Anyway I’ll try not to specify the dates again because really it’s too much unnecessary work and stress#I feel like I explained everything extremely unclear here but ignore it I don’t think I quite understand it either#Conclusion: I want everything to make sense and it makes me suffer and unnecessary complicates my life#*looks at my ciphers and laughs nervously*#I really have to write the whole separate post about my ciphers because damn#they’re literally just unbreakable I don’t think ciphers are supposed to work like that
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uh oh i’ve developed both a hyperfix on customizing rubber ducks and argos and mr plant within a matter of hours. on top of ttcc. how am i going to be able to sleep with all this adhd energy dawg
#gear diary#also i’m laying in bed at like 1:45 just now realizing that not only have i only eaten once today but i’ve been standing up so long#that now my legs are spasming like crazy and i’m hyper aware of every muscle in my body#and if the last few weeks are anything to go by i’m going to have nightmares at worst and stress dreams at best#tho i’ve had tf2 pop up a weird number of times in my dreams lately ? it’s come up a few times#and what sucks is i think i’ve only ever woke up from a nightmare like 3-4 times since my early childhood so when the dreams veer into that#i’m just …. stuck with it until i wake up in a rancid mood in da morning 👍#lately it hasn’t even been the cool nightmares. i want to go back to getting swallowed by sea monsters and stuck in animatronics lawl#mostly i just dream about my mom#or the fan-favorite “i’m in charge of the safety of a bunch of people and end up unable to save them leaving me alone with my guilt”#also. some dreams about being lost lately? like in big buildings/cities/subdivisions i think#it’s all fuzzy but i remember the feeling#good lort i got so off track. what is this. so sorry
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past me should be killed for making plans that present me isn’t keen on doing at all idc how good of a mood i was in wtf was i doing agreeing to go to a football game. i was not in my right mind
#like i did a lot of stuff today and i’m fucking tired i do not want to go to this game that lasts until like 9PM i don’t even LIKE football#but my sister wants to go goddd. why am i like this.#like 6PM-9PM yeah if anyone tries to do anything with me this weekend i’m saying no i’m sorry this week has already been rough i’m not doing#this again. and i can’t even back out and say i’m literally not in the mood anymore#idk. i’m just tired. and don’t wanna do it or anything at all#like i don’t like going out especially on weekends where i want to do nothing but chill.#obvi it’s not the worst thing in the world i just don’t want me being tired to be mistaken for attitude but it literally always is which is#why i don’t like leaving! or talking! or socializing!#my text
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mitski really was doing something evil when she was opening her 2022 tour concerts with love me more
#.txt#i love this song but lord does it impact me negatively#to think that i was still with my evil ex when it dropped. and that i was listening to it when we were SITTING TOGETHER IN A TRAIN on the#verge of tears because she was ignoring me and the relationship was becoming really rancid and i had the worst abandonment anxiety ever#that alone should have made me realise things weren't right but i was so blind :/// tfw you're so starved for love that you accept being#treated like shit and abused ://///#also the line 'we'll pretend it ends tomorrow' makes me think about leo now lskdkd added a whole new layer of evil to the song#like...when he told me he wasn't in love with me and didn't want a relationship on the last night during the time i was visiting him after#acting like a couple for MONTHS.....and i was so pathetic and in love that i asked if we could just. pretend it was still the same and be#tender and affectionate with eachother until the next day's afternoon when i take my train......most pathetic raph moment fr#the morning after when he was still sleeping i considered leaving but i stayed just so i could have that last bit of delusion. god when#we were waiting for the train to leave and we kissed one last time under the rain. most heartbreaking kiss of my life fr i was such a#fucking mess. and all of it meant absolutely nothing to him#so yeah that line feels very personal#anyway lol
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