#last part is because nobody in this fandom is happy

[bluetaho]

[ARCHIVIST]

Sometimes… I imagine if none of this had happened. If we had just… met. Been together, without… all of this.

[MARTIN]

But we wouldn’t have, would we? Been together, I mean.

(part 2)

[babygirlwolverine]

happiness is having someone comment that your writing is beautiful when you’ve been insecure to get back to writing again

[bucksdaffy]

today i'm thinking about how tim minear saved the henrentommy scene from the cutting room floor and sent it over to abc so that they could release it. when you think about it on its own, it's not really that special. tptb do that fairly often with their movies and shows: they save some extra content and include it alongside the official cut on dvds as a bonus feature. it's nothing out of the ordinary.

but this is tim minear we are talking about.

the same tim minear who, after 7x06 aired without the extended version of the buck and eddie karaoke scene (which angered a lot of buddie shippers to the point of sending him death threats), went on record to say that although he isn't really hesitant to share deleted scenes, it is something that has negative connotations for him. because last year, when he finished and released some 911 lone star scenes that were excluded from the finale, the fandom was furious that they were cut in the first place instead of enjoying the extra content. in the same statement, he mentioned that the reaction had left a bad taste in his mouth and so he wouldn't be doing that again.

given the context in which he said that, it's really hard to blame him. after all, he's human too, and it must suck ass when you release something you took your precious time to finish, thinking the fans would appreciate it, only for them to react negatively. he wasn't willing to go through that again. end of story.

except, he did do it again.

tim experienced backlash from both tarlos fans and buddie fans for not doing things their way. nobody would blame him if he didn't want to make the same mistake with bucktommy fans. but tim is sanguine. he is optimistic. he took a chance on us. he saved the scene from the cutting room floor, finished it, and sent it over to abc, knowing full well there was a chance that bucktommy fans would lash out as well. i like to think he was fairly certain this time would be different, though, due to all the positive interactions he has had with us. but at the end of the day, this is something only tim knows. the point is, he decided to risk it one more time. and i have to say, it makes me incredibly happy, and for once, i am really proud to be a part of something like the bucktommy nation. we may have a few bad apples, as all fandoms do, but as a whole, it is such a positive community. we appreciate all the content we get. we don't harass people for not giving us enough. we understand why the story goes the way it goes. we see how certain scenes don't necessarily fit with the narrative flow of a given episode. we are able to think critically. and all these traits are something that creators really do appreciate. i can only hope this continues until the end.

[webshooterrr9]

Dating Ushijima Wakatoshi as the Club Manager

Headcanons + fic for male!reader

Commission for @crashgrav1ty

w.c: 2k

content warning: none!, fluff, cheesy highschool romance with ushiwaka

Headcanons:

I feel like Ushijima would be a soft dom when dating you, not like in a sexual way, but in a romantic way. He’s just so kind and smart and he would be so gently protective of you. He would pull you closer by the waist if you were walking through a crowded area, not to turn you on, just to make sure he doesn’t lose you. He would 100% be the one to walk on the outside of the sidewalk, he follows the sidewalk rule by heart.

He would also be an incredible listener. Ushijima is a very quiet guy and I don’t think that would change when he’s with you, but if you’re a big talker that’s a good thing. He’d sit there and listen to you yap with a small smile on his face, just admiring the gleam in your eyes when you talk about your little anime crushes and current video games you enjoy. He’s lowkey very oblivious to any fandom culture, but he’d let you chat about the drama all you want.

As far as volleyball goes, he always wants to impress you. Which isn’t hard, given that he’s one of the top three hitters in the nation, but whatever. He’s always giving it his all during practice and at games because he knows you’re watching. I think he took very good care of his health before you started dating, but after you started dating and became the club manager, he was taking any opportunity he could to hydrate and stretch - because he knew that meant that he could be next to you, even if you don’t talk. He loves just holding you after games, silently hugging you close to him and resting his head on top of yours. Ushijima would stay like that forever if he could.

As far as PDA goes, I don’t think he’d be super into it, but not necessarily against it. I think it would mostly be just small displays of affection like hand holding. As a guy who doesn’t say many words, I strongly believe that his love language is physical touch and gifts. Ushijima would leave cute little notes on your desk, sometimes with nothing more than a smiley face and a heart, and he’d share his lunch with you everyday. You’d never be lonely at school, and he’d always help you with homework that you struggle with.

Fic:

Today is the big day! Well, not really. It’s just another practice game against some other school in Miyagi - but still! Even if it’s not a part of an official tournament, you were always excited to see your boyfriend do what he loved most.

Ushijima holds your hand in his as you two walk through the hallways. Your last class, Art History, just ended and now you’re both heading to the locker room to get ready for the game. He doesn’t say much, but you can see in the quick glances he keeps giving you that Ushi is very happy that you’re here with him. You don’t always make it to practice games due to family stuff, so he’s excited to know that you’ll be there to support him - even if he doesn’t do a good job at showing it.

“Hey, Waki?” you say, turning your head up towards his. His ears perk up at the nickname and he turns to look back at you while the two of you walk. “Do you think we’re gonna do good today?”

He pauses for a moment to think. “I assume so. Nobody on the team is injured.” he turns his gaze back to the direction in which you’re walking, but he’s still listening to you. “Why do you ask? Do you think we’re gonna do bad?”

“No, no! That’s not what I’m saying.” you quickly defend, waving your non-held-hand around. “You just seem a little down, that’s all.”

“Down?”

“Yeah. Down as in sad, not as in syndrome.”

“Oh,” he replies in that same monotone voice as usual. “I didn’t realize I appeared that way, my apologies.”

You two enter the locker room, and he lets go of your hand for a brief second to open the door, immediately returning it to its rightful place after you two have entered. “No need to apologize, I just want to make sure you’re okay is all.”

“I’m alright. Don’t worry.”

You both head over to your lockers, which are conveniently next to each other. Your eyes wander to the floor as he changes from his school uniform into his practice clothes. Even though you’ve been dating for a few months now, you’re still shy about changing. Ushijima sees you avoiding his gaze and lets out a small laugh, speeding up the process of putting his new clothes on so that you don’t have to be awkward for any longer.

Once he’s done changing, he puts a hand on your shoulder to signal that it’s okay to look. “Hey.” he says, trying to get your attention. You look up at Ushiwaka, and your cheeks flush when you see him. Maybe it’s the way he’s towering over you, or maybe it’s the quiet confidence he exudes, but something about him is just so appealing to you. Handsome. That’s the only way to describe him. His short hair is neatly styled with hazel eyes softly looking into yours. There’s a gentle smirk on his face, one that would be missed by anyone but you.

“Yeah?” you ask, trying to be nonchalant. I mean yeah, you’re dating, but you still don’t want him to know that you’re crushing on him hard. Is it even possible to crush on your boyfriend? Or is that just love? Love. Woah. Big word. Not yet.

“I was wondering if maybe, after the game, you wanted to go get some taiyaki with me.” he took his hand off of your shoulder, but still maintained the eye contact that made your knees weak with joy.

A smile creeped up on your face. You jump up in excitement. “Duh, of course! I love that stuff!”

He chuckles at your excitement. You were always known to get a bit aggressive when passionate, and he found that cute. The way your face lit up when he mentioned food is a sight Ushijima will never get tired of. Ever.

“Great,” he smiled, putting his hand back in yours. “Let’s get out there then. To the game, I mean.”

You watch intently as your boyfriend and his teammates score point after point in the practice game. There were a few moments where they slipped up, but all in all, the match was a success for the team. You’d always be amazed by just how not tired he seems, even after running and jumping everywhere. You wonder if this guy even has the ability to sweat, or if he’s some sort of superhuman, volleyball machine.

The game was winding down, with the current score being 24-20 to Shiratorizawa. You were happy to cheer your boyfriend on, making sure that his water bottle was always full. After the visiting team got back on their bus to go home, you walked over to Ushiwaka.

“You did it, Waki!!” you beam, bouncing over to him with a spring in your step now that you two can hang out one-on-one. He smiles at you as he grabs his bag and water bottle.

“Ready to go?” he asks, and you nod your head excitedly. The two of you walk out of the school, getting on your bikes and riding down to your nearest Taimu to get those yummy desserts you were promised. By the time you two arrive there, the sun is already starting to set. Ushijima pays for your taiyaki and you both take a seat on a bench out front. You dig into the fish-shaped confectionery eagerly, not wasting a single crumb. Ushiwaka eats with you, although much slower.

You two talk about anything and everything, with most of the words being spoken by you. He watches the way your dark eyes seem to shine in the light of the setting sun, and the way the high points of your skin gleam. The way your smile stretches across your face, and the loud laugh you give when telling him a funny story. All the while, he has his hand on yours, lightly rubbing over your knuckles with his palm.

The pink and orange sky starts to fade into purple, with the cotton candy clouds clearing the way for the moon. You notice the streetlights turn on, and decide to wrap up your outing before your parents get mad at how late you’re staying out. “We should probably head home. I don’t want my parents getting mad at me.”

“Yeah. We wouldn’t want that.”

Ushijima goes to stand up, but you grab his wrist to stop him. “Wait.”

He turns back to look at you, with a quizzical expression on his face. You stand up with him, letting go of his hand for a moment. “Was this a date?” you ask, somewhat timidly.

Your boyfriend takes a moment to think before smiling, and even laughing a bit under his breath. “Of course it was.” he smiles, leaning down to plant a small kiss on your forehead. You blush furiously at the gesture, but try to play it off. “Right. Cool. Thought so.”

He smirks again at your reaction, but says nothing more. The two of you bicycle back to your house, and he walks you all the way up to your front door. When you step inside, your pets are all there to greet you. You wave goodbye to your lover, blowing him a little kiss goodnight - something you cringed at yourself for later. Ushijima waves back, waiting until you’re fully inside before he heads home.

As Ushiwaka returns to his small farmhouse, all he can think about is you. When he sets down his bag, all he thinks about is you. When he returns the animals to their pens, all he thinks about is you. Even as he’s drifting off to sleep, you’re the only thing on his mind.

He just can’t believe how lucky he is to have you. Someone who understands him, someone who supports him unconditionally. He doesn’t need to speak for you to know what he’s thinking, and for that he thanks you. Listening to the crickets outside his bedroom window, all he wonders is if you’re asleep already. Probably not. And honestly, he’s more than happy to be there for you in the morning when you complain about how tired you are. He’s already prepared to pack a lunch for you.

And as Ushijima finally slips into unconsciousness, all he can think about is how much he loves you. It’s cheesy, he knows, but he’s so grateful to be able to experience teenage love with you. And one day, he’ll show you just how much you mean to him.

this was a commission for a friend!

my commissions are not currently open, i only accepted this one because i've known this person for years

in the future, i plan to open commissions for those who want a personalized fic!

the original fic was more detailed to the commissioner's life, but i edited out the private details for security.

hope you enjoyed!

much love to all my supporters mwah

[a-doubleh-x]

Why I like Charlastor

The other day I noticed there was some negativity in the Charlastor tag, including antis and people feeling the need to defend against antis, so I thought I might as well take a step back and just write candidly about why I like the ship.

I only got into Hazbin in October of last year, but already it has inspired me a lot to write and fantazise about it. Like most people, I started with the classic "they look cute together", but as I kept looking I couldn't help but think there was something else to these two than first met the eye.

For starters, I love Pollyanas! I think they get a bad rep for being naive, but I just appreciate an optimist like Charlie who just wants to make people around her happy because it makes her happy. I also like bad boys 😳 I'm a pretty heteronormative guy, so I haven't had a big chance to explore that part of myself yet, but I do like the danger and excitement someone like Alastor brings to the table.

I will admit when I started writing Charlastor I felt like I was handling dynomite. It's a lil scary to ship a boundless altruist with a manipulative sociopath, but bear with me.

I think each of them has something the other needs. I think Charlie needs someone to challenge her, someone to steer her in the right direction while she's mostly isolated. At the start of the series, practically nobody but Vaggie takes her seriously, and Alastor is no exception. He mocks her, teases her, but she still listens and I think it's because somewhere deep down she understands there's something he's trting to communicate in his annoying, but curious way.

Of course, I also love the fanon Charlie who's down bad for Alastor, and even if that Charlie is a little naive, I think it's also sweet and she can use some indulgence while most people treat her like a child.

On the other hand, when it comes to Alastor, this is a bit of a theory on my part, but I think he's secretely lonely. He has friends, certainly, like Rosie and Mimzy, but they're not good enough friends to live together with him. They don't seem to be able to save him from "pure, absolute boredom". But Charlie, for some reason can, even though she's a stranger at the beginning when Alastor chooses to move into the Hotel.

Alastor is not as much of a cynic as someone who chooses to see things in a perspective that benefits him. He doesn't think redeeming sinner is "hopeless", but "hilarious" instead, which has interesting implications to me. That's why he chooses to hover around Charlie, not because he thinks she's lame, rather because he thinks she's silly. She makes him laugh. Which I think is kind of how Alastor sees "love".

And then you have fanon Alastor who, depending on the writer, is either a horny animal, a wisecrack edgelord or a soft boy who's mean to everyone but Charlie XD I like several of those interpretations, but I kinda prefer mine just out of personal taste. I think the best part about Alastor is that he doesn't *care* what anyone thinks of him and always does what he wants, even at the expense of other people, which I find pretty enviable.

They're kinda both outcasts in their own ways. Charlie by being unable to fit in and Alastor being unwilling to compromise. But they don't judge each other. He supports her in his own weird way and she houses him and is delighted of him in general, which is tasty food for his ego. I do wonder why Alastor is interested in Charlie, both in canon and in a fandom vacuum.

There's some cool potential for drama there, but also growth and healing, in my opinion. Personally, I think Alastor doesn't want to actually *hurt* Charlie, but he may hurt those around her, which will be a moment to start settling compromises if Charlie puts her foot down.

That haz bin my review so far! I'm honestly pretty grateful for Vivziepop for all of the work she's done so far, I know directing, animating and writing two shows over the course of 5 year or so ain't easy. I'm also grateful to the fandom who shares their thoughts and vision, which calms the terrible voices I started hearing in my head since I bought this weird old radio.

I'm in the middle of a break, but if you're interested in my fanfics I'll get back to writing very soon. Cheers! 🌈❤🦌

[directdogman]

Hey there's someone trying to say you said you were pro Israel on discord? They're anonymous and say you blocked them before they could get screenshots so I don't really believe them, but still :[

Mhm. Nice bit of news to wake up to, this.

Yeah, so this person's a troll and they're more than likely lying on purpose in order to try to me look bad because I blocked them on Twitter for being unpleasant, something I rarely even do and they're still seething about it. The block had nothing to do with Gaza, the person was just being annoying and I thought it'd be healthier to block and move on. I'd really prefer not to have to give this person energy, but if there's a rumor going around, I'd like to nip it in the bud, since it's very easy to disprove in this case.

To explain what this person's blathering about: Earlier this week, on a Phonegingi plush advert, this random user that doesn't follow me (and actually instructs fans of mine not to interact with them in their bio) made a dramatic QRT decrying me for posting a DT advert during a strike week, which I honestly had no clue it was, especially since my own timeline was (and still is) full of accounts posting normally.

Given that the person seemingly encountered one of my posts in the wild and ended up seething because of it + likely didn't want anything to do with me on their timeline (as their bio indicated), after thinking it over briefly, I did the healthy thing and just blocked the person + moved on. Makes sense, right? I'll admit: Even if the way the person approached me was regrettable, if I'd known it was a strike week, I'd have participated (as I'd participated in the last one), so I stopped posting teasers for the week anyway, only resuming again yesterday.

I'll also say: I checked my own timeline btw and looked at the accounts posting, and nobody else had anyone acting like this in their replies, even the much larger accounts. Nor did anyone else contact/reply to me in any way stating any disapproval.

Given that I've only blocked one account recently that isn't a replybot (and ofc, given the subject matter of that tweet), I'd have to assume that this is the anonymous person spreading stuff.

I'd understand where this person was coming from if maybe I'd stayed completely silent about Gaza, (which a lot of accounts I follow have) but I haven't. I had a Palestinian aid post pinned on my Twitter for weeks, I've talked about Gaza's child population and my support for South Africa's Hague suit in my discord server, I've engaged in the boycotts, wound down posting during strikes, donated a pretty substantial amount of Dialtown revenue towards sending money/esims... I have 4 bucks in my bank account right now and when my next DT check comes in, you'd better believe I'll be giving more. That's my right as a private citizen and one I'll continue to exercise.

I feel pretty uncomfortable having to put this stuff in front of me to 'prove' myself, even if some of it is public anyway. Charity should be something you do because you CARE and if it wasn't for this person, I'd have been far happier keeping a lower profile and not explicitly calling attention to my own aid, but given this ask, I feel it'd be stupid not to nip this in the bud. The majority of this information could be easily found with the tiniest amount of digging, btw, so it's not like the user couldn't have known any of this. This is the part of having a fandom that creators seldom talk about. You block one person for being a lil annoying, next thing you know, there's rumors that you support genocides! Fun.

So yeah, I'd like you to tell this person to just move on like a normal person (send them this post if you have to) and to stop spreading incorrect rumors about me out of spite. If they insist, I'm happy to pull up receipts to prove everything I've said. If they actually thought I was pro-Israel, they wouldn't be spreading it anonymously, they'd be writing another public post about the subject matter. Also if you see anyone repeating the rumor, please correct them. Thanks.

[ignisgalaxia]

With the release of Prodigy season 2, the Trek fandom finally has an answer to what Chakotay's native ancestry is. He's Nicarao, a tribe from the western region of Nicaragua who actually share a common ancestry with the Nahua Aztecs of Mexico. The show even mentions the island of Ometepe specifically, which is the largest island in Lake Nicaragua made up of two volcanoes.

The reason this is so important to me is because my dad and his family are from Nicaragua. I’ve been getting more in touch with those roots over the last year or so, and I’ve found it very frustrating how there seems to be no Nica representation in media, at least not in the mainstream. But when I found out that Chakotay was a fellow Nica, I was literally bouncing off the walls. To think, one of my favorite characters has the same ancestry as me (well, almost, but I’ll get to that later)! When I told my dad, he laughed so hard because he never would’ve imagined.

But I haven’t seen a lot of people talking about this aspect. I get it, it’s a minuscule part of the wild ride that was season 2. But I’d really like us as a fandom to discuss this more. I mean, we literally don’t have to guess what tribe he’s from anymore!

So since nobody else has come forward, I am going to claim myself as the only member of the Voyager-Prodigy fandom with actual Nicaraguan ancestry, and am making this post to give firsthand information about the Nicarao and the nation as a whole.

Firstly, some context. My dad was born in Managua, the capital of Nicaragua, and lived there with his family until he was 7. Then they fled the country due to the Contra War that was going on. My grandfather was born and raised in Bluefields, a city on the country's Carribean coast, then went to college in Mexico where he met my grandmother. Neither of them are Nicarao, and are in fact very European (the DNA tests proved it). However, when they were all living in Managua, my grandparents had a handful of maids that worked for them (they had six kids they needed some help), and a couple of them were Nicarao. Specifically, they were natives from a village in the nearby mountains. So while I don't have info on natives from Ometepe, I do have some on the people in general.

The maids lived with my dad's family during the week and would go home to their village on the weekends. They primarily spoke Spanish, but he would occasionally catch them speaking in their native tongue which I assume is Nahua.

My dad recounted a time when the maids invited the family to their village for a day trip. He said they were living in Adobe houses and had lots of livestock (cattle, chickens, goats, etc) as well as horses, which he apparently rode for the first time there. He also said most of the natives had two primary weapons: a machete to cut crops and other vegetation, and a 22 single shot rifle. They used the rifles to shoot iguanas off trees. Iguanas and iguana eggs are a delicacy in Nicaragua that the natives are experts at making.

This is a direct quote from my grandmother when I asked her about what she remembered of them:

The people I knew, they were good and hard working people. Smart, happy, funny… they really are sociable, like to talk and say jokes invented with their mind and history. The women were skillful, knew how to survive. They cooked, cleaned, planted crops and vegetables. Good merchants, they really knew how to sell and buy.

I wish I had more info to share, but unfortunately season 2 could not have been released at a worse time because my grandfather has recently begun developing Alzheimer's or some other form of dementia and has been losing his memory over the last few months. Even when my dad and I were with him in May and I asked him to recount his earlier life, he repeated himself a few times since he evidently had forgotten he'd already told us those parts. If I had known how fast he’d be deteriorating, I would’ve started my work sooner.

If I do end up learning anything more from my relatives, I’ll update the post. For now, I hope this is of some use to people. And if anyone has questions about Nicaraguan culture in general, I’ll be happy to pass them along to my dad.

[fiabex]

FIAB: Nominations Open!

Nominations for the tag set for the Fic In A Box exchange are now open (a little earlier than scheduled, cause we're excited), and we're looking for your nominations if you want to join us.

Join us...

What Is This?

A gift exchange is an event where participants create fanworks to gift to each other. Fic In A Box is a fanwork exchange with a large minimum gifting requirement and several unique features. Gifts can include fic, art, audio, video— and much much more.

You Mentioned Nominations? Tag set? What?

Once signups open, people looking to participate in the event are only able to pick from a prepared list of Fandoms and Relationships for their signup. That's the Tag Set that the exchange is using. (You can look at last year's here.) Sign ups aren't open yet, but this week is prep for signups in the form of actually making this tag set. So, if you want a tag to be available when you sign up, this is where you make sure it's available! (If you've ever done an exchange and the tags were available in nice auto-complete dropdown menus— a tagset is how they were available.)

Niche fandom you love? Favourite blorbos you want to bring with you? Classic story that you need to have available to you? Come on over and nominate them all!

Anyone can nominate tags, and there's no restriction on tags— even if your fandom isn't canonized or your ship has never been posted on the archive, you can nominate it and we'll add it. Original works, crossover fandom, and RPF are all allowed. You can even nominate worldbuilding tags if there are parts about your favourite fannish world that you want to see explored. You can check the Tag Set to see what tags have already been added this year. And how do you nominate tags? Well.

The process of nominating tags is a little precise in this exchange, because we do have so many people participating (last year we had over a thousand fandoms in the tag set), so please check the nomination guidelines before you start. The easiest way is through a google form that is linked on the guidelines post. Links and detailed instructions for how to nominate are all on the post! To avoid having tags in the set nobody is going to use and making more work for the tag mods, we ask that you only nominate tags you intend to use when you sign up, but aside from that, the sky's the limit. Hit us with your blorbos.

If you have questions, feel free to ask them here, check the dreamwidth blog for much more documentation, email the mods, or join our discord server. The discord server has a lot of experienced participants happy to answer questions, and you are also welcome to join just to hang out!

Links

Email: ficinaboxmod@gmail.com

Ao3 Collection (sign up here once signups open)

Tag Set

Dreamwidth Blog

Discord (includes question channel)

Note: you must be 18 or older to join FIAB.

[sheeple]

Miracles don't exist | 31: Important tasks

Genre(s): Riddle!reader / Slytherin!reader / kinda slowburn / little happy moments Fandom(s): Harry Potter Pairing(s): Theodore Nott x Reader / Harry Potter x Riddle!reader Summary: Being the Dark Lord's daughter and raised under the strict supervision of the Malfoy's is no easy life. Especially if you start crushing on your father's arch-nemesis, Harry Potter. And that while being engaged to one of his follower’s sons. Warning(s): Insecure MC / minor character death/ Nagini does a gobble gobble A/n: Last year y'all! The story is coming to an end :( [Masterlist] [Mini masterlist] [Playlist]

Like a reflex, your eyes shoot open as the first water droplet hits the window. You glance at the glow-in-the-dark arms of the clock on your nightstand. 2:41 it reads. 

With your pillow under your arm, you paddle across the hallway, towards the end. You don't knock when you enter the bedroom and you can easily navigate around the furniture in the dark. Siding under the covers, you fluff up your pillow before pressing your face against Theo's back.

He hums, turning towards you and draping an arm over your middle. "What are you doing here?" His voice is low and drowsy.

You burrow yourself further into his embrace. "It's going to storm", is your simple answer. A sleepy laugh rumbles through his chest. It's the same answer you always give when you curl up next to him.

Because the truth is, despite being engaged to each other, you're not allowed to sleep in the same bed. They want little pure-blood Heirs of Slytherin running around, but not out of wedlock. 

Nonetheless, the two of you entangle your limbs and sleep almost every night together. 

And nobody says anything about it. They don't dare to. Somehow, you've instilled fear in the Dark Lord's followers by just existing. The one good thing about it is that they leave you alone. 

"There's another meeting today." You tuck your hands under your face and look at the dark-haired boy next to you. "Wormtail was sent to kidnap someone today. I've heard their screams when walking around the Manor."

A shiver runs down your spine. Theo says nothing, he tugs you on top of him and wraps both his arms protectively around you. "We have to be careful. Of everything we do", he whispers, his voice wavering. 

You say nothing, rubbing your cheek against his chest like a cat. The two of you stay like this for hours until the sun shines through the windows and gives your face a golden glow.

Theo caresses your chin and cheek, tracing over the scar left behind by the Boy Who Lived. You turn your face away so he's no longer touching it. But Theo takes hold of your chin, forcing your face towards him. He tries to meet your eyes, but you keep them downcast.

"Listen... listen to me. Your pretty face and I are going to survive this. Do you understand me? And every scar, wound, or other injury, we're going to wear them with pride. Because we're survivors."

He gives you a look that tells you he's not messing around. A small smile blooms on your face, making Theo smile in return.

The mood at the table is tense. If it was not for the floating Hogwarts teacher, then is it for the fact that Snape is late and the Dark Lord is losing his patience. When the said man finally arrives, he takes place on the left side of the Dark Lord, his blank eyes meeting yours.

"You bring news, I trust."

"It will happen Saturday next at nightfall."

"I've heard differently, my Lord." Everybody's heads are turned to the other side. "Dawlish, the Auror let it slip that the Potter boy will not be moved until the 30th of this month", Yaxley goes on, his hands clasped together. "The day before he turns seventeen."

Your eyes flicker to Theodore, who's between Yaxley and Nott Sr. Theo's eyes are focused on the blond man next to him.

"This is a false trail", interjects Snape, "The Auror Office no longer plays any part in the protection of Harry Potter." Snape turns towards the Dark Lord, "those closest to him believe we have infiltrated the Ministry."

A Death Eater pipes up. "Well, they've got that right haven't they?" A laugh rumbles through the room.

"What say you, Pius?"

The Imperiused man on the other side of the table focuses his glassy eyes to the best of his ability towards the Dark Lord. "One hears many things, my Lord. Whether the truth is among them is not clear."

The Dark Lord lets out a chuckle. "Spoken like a true politician. You will, I think, proven most useful, Pius." His attention flickers back to Snape. "Where will he be taken, the boy?"

You zone out. It's what you have noticed is most effective for keeping sane during all those meetings. You get pulled out of your trance for a moment as the kidnapped 'guest' in the cellar lets out a yell. But it's not until you feel the Dark Lord's hand trail over your shoulder that you pay attention again.

He stops next to Lucius, holding his hand out for him. "My Lord?", squeaks the blond man.

Voldemort mocks your uncle. He reaches his hand out, "I require your wand." Once he receives the wand, he snaps the ridiculous snake head off and throws it on the table.

He points the wand at the floating teacher, bringing her to a stop over the table. "For those of you who do not know, we are joined today by Miss Charity Burbage who, until recently, taught at Hogwarts. Her speciality was Muggle Studies."

You look in fear as the Death Eaters around you laugh mockingly. you know Professor Burbage, very well in fact. Muggle Studies was one of the ways you defied your family's ways. 

"It is Miss Burbage's belief that Muggles... are not so different from us. She would, given her way, have us mate with them."

His speech falls on deaf ears. Your breathing has picked up as you look with big, scared eyes at your Professor. One of your most beloved professors. Her face is morphed in pain as her body is contorted in strange ways. Your bottom lip trembles as she locks eyes with you before moving on to Snape.

You can see her lips move, begging for her life, but the words don't register. With a quick green flash, her dead corpse falls on the table. Professor Burbuga's lifeless eyes stare at you, a tear rolling out of her eye.

"Nagini... dinner."

The snake slithers up the table, through your legs. Everybody pulls their hands away from the table as she makes her way towards the teacher. She opens her jaws and pounces upon the body, ripping her to shreds.

"Young mister Nott." 

Your head snaps from the Dark Lord to the now pale-as-a-sheet Theo. He gives you a look before focussing on the man at the head of the table. "Y... yes, my Lord?"

The Dark Lord has a small sadistic smile on his face. "You are expected to join us, next Saturday in the capture of Harry Potter."

Theodore swallows. "Of course, my Lord. It will be an honour."

"Am I also to join?", you ask, finding your voice.

But the Dark Lord shakes his head. "No, my Heir. I have a far more important task for you."

Taglist (bold means I couldn’t tag you): @the0doreslover @lqndkxlmqma @st4rrry  @choppedpartymuffinwinner @ledtassoo @literallyobessed @lestat-whore​ @vanishingcherry @harrysnovia @pietrobae @ireallywannasleep127 @yeolsbubbles @fruityfrog505 @fluffybunnyu @theroyalmanatee @shinrjj @hegdus @kermits-bitch @m1kasawps @noah-uhhh-what @mypolicemanharryyy @fals3-g0d @decapitated-coffee @thatgirljas13 @slytherinambitious @raineisms @mastermindmiko @timmytime17 @regsg18 @supernatural-lover @bubybubsters @lafrone @hermionelove @the-sander-fander @akengii @aliciacat20 @unstablereader @burns-in-the-sun @rachelnicolee @damagelove @mqndrqke @llpovi @clairesjointshurt @222244445555 @jolly4holly

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

BNHA 420: Nothing About This is 'Okay'

It never fails.

After BNHA 420, I'm definitely done. The only thing that's stopping me from being OFFICIALLY done is the sunken cost fallacy. And some nostalgia in that I used to LOVE BNHA. I mean I still do, I love early BNHA, but the ending is really bad.

This last chapter pretty much did everything I feared. And I was just about to eat a slice of humble pie when it SEEMED like the author faked out the idea that Eri's Rewind would be utilized. But as it turns out... I WAS RIGHT! XD They used her after all.

For once I am not happy to be right. Because what went down was just so WRONG.

Because Eri almost seems GLAD to be used. And these so-called heroes are ENCOURAGING it. She literally mutilated herself just because she thought it would 'help' Deku and the others. This child hurt herself, a child way, way younger than the high-school aged 'heroes', hurt herself. And nobody's worried about it. Not even Aizawa! I don't count that look of shock as worry, otherwise he would have been a lot more upset with her.

But no, he just accepted what this little girl did to herself. No moral qualms about it whatsoever.

Using Eri no matter what was always going to be horrible, but the way it's been done is even more horrible than I could have ever imagined. And it has an extra horrible implication.

Hurt yourself to help people, and let that person hurt themself, even if they're SIX YEARS OLD because it's a 'rational' decision. That is such bullshit btw, how in the hell is that 'rational'? That's actually extremely concerning and yet nobody is even concerned, they just think it's a heroic act? My ass.

I'm still pissed that this little moeblob is truly an example of a perfect little victim who just seems innately good even though she really shouldn't be after everything she's been through. It makes ZERO sense and I really hate it.

I really don't like Eri or her role in this arc as many others are saying now, and I never have. People love to give me flak for it, but I don't care anymore. This is definitely the last straw for me and it just validated that my concerns were right all along.

An adorable little plot device that was always meant to be used for Deku and the heroes. Even though she was used by Overhaul, it apparently makes it 'okay' if the heroes use her because they're heroes. If anything, it not only makes them just as bad as Overhaul, it actually makes them WORSE than Overhaul.

Overhaul at least never pretended that what he was doing to Eri was okay, but the heroes are such hypocrites that they're using her too and calling it 'rational' and an act of heroism on her part. It's not.

And the worst part is the fandom seems to believe that this makes Eri 'so good' when no, it's deeply concerning for a child to do such a thing to herself. Her actions should NOT be praised, and I don't like the kid, but that doesn't mean I want to see her hurt herself!

It's not okay. None of this is okay. And I am once again, really not okay with this.

[broken-heart-raven-queen]

One thing that I know for sure is that if Renee was a man Jerejean wouldn't be so popular and a lot of people would be sad that Jeanee is not end game.

I thought of it the day Lazarus came out and people on twitter went crazy "discovering" that they are a couple, that they have real feelings, that Renee really cared for Jean (Most people probably ignored the fact that they were already something in canon).

Don't take me wrong, I like JereJean as an end game couple, I feel like it's good for Jean to have someone who can show him the brightness of the world because he never saw the true darkness in it and is so far from the horrible things that Jean lived that he can talk (or not) about it how he wants and Jeremy would listen. Also I'm a sucker for emo x preppy ships.

But I just know that maybe if Renee wasn't a girl maybe TSC wouldn't even exist (as I know that part of the fuel for Nora to make peace with the writing was the impact the story had on people) or maybe it would anyways because there was still something to tell about them but it would be totally different... or maybe this version always was in Nora's mind but people would have been so mean because "Why is this man who is nobody and came out of the blue getting in the middle of this perfect couple??" And maybe she wouldn't want to share it with us.

For me is so weird that a fandom with so many women in it hates female characters so much that are happy to gaslight themselves to errase their participation in canon or to make it a completely different thing (as happens with Thea) just to have another m/m ship.

And I know Renee is a very liked character in general and this story contributed to her popularity, and maybe the people that follows me here or who would read this post already thought highly of her, but anyways this was in my head for the last few days and wanted to share it.

P. S: This applies too for when Nora said she and Andrew were fuckbuddies if it were a man there wouldn't have been so many hate to that idea (like people usually don't hate Roland specifically for this, maybe some do for the age difference but that's another talk).

[buffkitties]

People who think that Nanami and Komaeda hate each other are genuinely so... Confusing? I don't get it. They're friends.

Nanami is openly kind to him, and out of everyone, she and Hinata are the ones who treat him with the most respect... She's caring and understanding, and she makes sure that he feels like a part of the group, too. In the anime, they actually seem rather comfortable and close, too, even if they aren't like best friends.

Also, if Komaeda hated her, he wouldn't have been affected by her death as much as everyone else. He became a remnant just like everybody else did because it hurt him just like it hurt everyone else. She mattered to everyone.

Komaeda isn't hated by everyone either. They do try to be friendly. They just don't understand him, and they all have a difficult relationship with him. I think it's more that they're uncomfortable around him because he can get rather unsettling with how he talks to and about them. They try. I mostly just blame Kodaka for making them treat Komaeda so weirdly sometimes because he wrote him in an ableist way.

As for the Nanami and Komaeda thing, I blame the ship discourse. I don't think Hinanami should be romantic because their friendship is a very important part of the plot, and their platonic relationship is much more important than some fandom drama. Hinata and Nanami's friendship is a precious thing to me, and I wish it lasted longer, and they could have played one more game together.

The people who say that Hinata can't love Komaeda fully because he didn't move on from Nanami make me so annoyed. He wasn't interested in her romantically, and he had already moved on. He's the one who's helping everyone move on, too. He said so himself, and it is because he didn't want to let Nanami's death mean nothing or go to waste after she was sacrificed for selfish plans. He didn't want to forget her either, and he loves and cares for Komaeda.

That being said, I believe that Nanami would actually be really happy for them if they ever decided to actually become a couple. It would most likely not happen so easily, even in non-despair universes, but I think the way she would react is an adorable thing to imagine.

Since I'm talking about her: She cares for every one of her classmates and she considered Hinata her classmate and friend just like everybody else. The way she spoke to him, the way she never saw him for talent, just for the person he was... She truly cared about him, and to think that she looked for him in their meeting spot for so long, just to find out he became a person that didn't even recognise himself hurts. Nobody told her anything about him. He just disappeared. The fact that she recognised him immediately and that when she heard about the human experimentation and the protests, all she wanted to know if Hinata was okay makes me sad.

Hinata, you never needed to change. You were already loved the way you were. I wish you could have seen that for yourself and that the school didn't exploit you in such a way. I'm sorry that you were put in such a harsh position, where you had to abandon your dreams because you didn't have a talent or choose a world in which you weren't even yourself because your family couldn't pay for the fee that the school used for the very experiment you were hurt in.

[chuchayucca]

I KNOW! When I first saw the concept art, it fueled my love for these guys even more! Happy that you now have more content of the Bounty Hunter to keep that love going!

I hid that gold in the tags because I had no idea how to bring it up in the first reblog but since you brought up good points, we can talk about it!!!

YUP

I alway had a feeling that the Bountry Hunters had and still do hold resentment towards the main genres because they minimized their history. For example, (These are only headcanons) K-Pop trolls originally originated from Pop trolls but they're barely mentioned in the Pop trolls history books or how Reggaeton trolls are a mixed of Hiphop and Pop trolls but again, their existence isn’t acknowledged in either trolls history’s. Despite the trolls’s social values being family and unity, the bounty Hunter trolls are excluded from the main genres.

(Again, only a headcanon) Death in the Hinterlands is treated differently than in the main genres because when a troll dies, it means their music is closer to extinction. There is a somber acknowledgement that everyone’s music in the Hinterland will eventually go extinct one day and because they only have each other, there’s a graveyard memorial. The graveyard is dedicated to dead trolls of forgotten music. Every troll there has a gravestone, their instruments/whatever ironic objects from their music, and little facts written about them and their music. Once a year, the Hinter trolls celebrate the memories of these dead trolls so their legacy can never be lost.

Oooooo thissssss too! I know Dreamworks had to keep the movie’s tone light because it’s a kids movie but I can easily imagine an alternative movie cut with darker tones.

In this video, you can tell there was a much more serious tone overall. The fight between Rock and Classical trolls, Cowboy Hickory being hostile where Branch was ready to stab him, Dickory’s dialogue in the deleted diner scene and the diner scene showing these bounty Hunter trolls are so forgotten that Barb promising them to be an opening act on her World tour makes them happy despite probably knowing she plans to get rid of all music expect for rock. The friend and I think the original idea for World Tour was supposed to be a critique on Pop music and it’s negative impact on music but they scrapped it because how serious it was and they probably didn’t know what to do for the original bounty hunter trolls��� happy ending.

I bring this up because I can imagine duringthe K-pop and Reggaeton trolls hunt for Branch, they got into a fight on which music deserves to stay and it got personal involving mentions of family members. There probably have been other Hinter trolls who left the Hinterlands and their friends because they wanted to try negotiating with one of the main genre to make their music semi-popular again. Or some Hinter trolls who just never returned once they’re were old enough to travel because they don’t want to reminded of the mortality of their music.

We have barely scratch the surface of these trolls and the Hinterlands, but there is so much potential for angst with these ideas.

I’m happy you liked my headcanons! If you have/want to, do you have any headcanons for the Bounty Hunter trolls? (Also I didn’t mentioned this but the Jazz trolls headcanon was created by @reblogforlifeman. She has a bunch of them)

Sooooo I haven't moved on from the trolls world tour bounty hunters.

The reggaeton trolls and their really cool designs and music....

Hickory and Dickory's entire thing with playing the long haul in trying to get close to poppy to steal her string.......

THE KPOP TROLLS AND THEIR MISSED POTENTIAL AND AND THEIR DESIGNS AND THEY'RE REALLY CUTE AND LOVELY

And CHAZ THE FUCKING SMOOTH JAZZ TROLL!??!??!??!?! need I say more. I mean just look at him.

I am going to start. A fandom. Surrounding these guys. Just watch me.

They are so silly and I love them

[utilitycaster]

forgive me if i don’t make sense bc i don’t really know how to articulate this, but taliesin talked a lot about “trying to figure out what punk means in exandria” and wondering what’s there to be angry about. and after the last string of episodes i feel like that it’s a question that he baked into ashton’s character. like yes ashton is punk and they have justified anger but the Rest of their anger is deflective to stop them from interrogating themselves and their decisions further. idk it’s really interesting to me

It is! It's something I really love about Ashton and it's something I think Taliesin was very thoughtful about in his character creation. I think Taliesin is extremely strong in character creation in general, and it's a rare person who can make a character based on a philosophical premise who also feels very real.

That really is the core of Ashton, and I think it's a great commentary. I do still intend to watch The Decline of Western Civilization Part III (winter break perhaps?) but I am broadly familiar with the gutter-punks on which Ashton was based, and again, the punk movement as a whole. There have always been politically-minded punks; but I advise you look up the backgrounds of, say, the average Fugazi/Minor Threat, Bad Religion, Dead Kennedys, or Propagandhi musician because they are, by and large, middle-class white guys with relatively stable and happy childhoods, and the idea of Ashton as someone dedicated to the Tumblr uwu kindness is punk "look at this perfect baby who doesn't steal pennies how kind and generous to only take literally everything else" archetype was always a massive projection. They've always been far more in the model of the Break Shit, Get Wasted punk than, well, the straight edge and veganism of the above.

(I also think that while it's true that a lot of punk houses did take in anyone and were something of a refuge for many a la Color In Your Cheeks, there was also a lot of Missing Stair Fallacy shit going on in the punk community even then. Ashton is in fact an example of the flaws in that sort of subculture: the Nobodies were there until they really, really weren't, and that's not unusual for that kind of punk friendship. It's found family until you're too inconvenient and dangerous to make it worth it. Taliesin explores this a lot, incidentally; that was very much what he was doing with Molly, and I would love to hear him talk about that kind of surface-level closeness that isn't strong enough to stick because as someone who both participates in fandom and loves to observe and analyze fandom as a phenomenon itself, it's a very real dynamic.)

Ashton has had an awful life. That's the premise. Nothing good has happened to them. There are plenty of valid reasons for them to be angry. Some are people who deserve it (their parents for the fucked up ritual; the Nobodies for abandoning them; Jiana Hexum for exploiting them), some are people who don't deserve their anger but to be fair haven't done anything to deserve their respect either (Percy, the gods), but many have been perfectly kind and reasonable and Ashton has rejected them because they're in a position of authority or seemed too nice. And there's plenty of stuff he's mad about that isn't easily pinned on anyone; the chronic pain is a shitty side effect of one or both of his traumas but no one person is responsible.

Ashton is an incredibly cynical person, and this extends to himself. As I've said before, I think they absolutely mean it when they say that they would have done the exact same thing the Nobodies would do, and this has been used to both cover up the intense hurt that came from their abandonment, but also, I think part of Ashton's own self-loathing comes from the fact that yeah, they are the kind of person who'd have done the same, and that isn't a very good person, and being angry at the Nobodies and Jiana and the world at large has allowed him to avoid looking that truth in the face. Ashton has always bounced between "I'll be the best broken thing I can be" and "what if I could be more? what if I could be what I could have been if things went well?" and also "who the fuck cares" and the reveal, that when the chips are down, he will make an ill-advised and self-destructive choice from that place of pain and anger has really rattled them. He can't keep just being angry and using that to shield himself from difficult questions. It won't just kill them, but it will hurt everyone around them too.

A really ugly truth of life is that even when something is completely not your fault and even when you have been dealt a rotten, unfair hand, often, you do have some degree of responsibility to deal with it ("And if it isn't my fault, I certainly didn't do anything to deal with it," as Ashton says.) The mere act of being angry is cathartic but doesn't actually solve anything. I think that's Keyleth's message to Orym, actually; it's not fair, and you're angry that it's not fair, but you need to use that anger to do things yourself instead of letting it consume you or passing the buck because it sure as hell isn't your turn. Ashton has, since the solstice, been playing tug of war with the idea that this anger has perhaps not been serving him, and he finally lost. Initially they realized a lot of this anger had been self-pity, but then, as they said, one week of thinking their parents actually were something led them to do the exact same dumb cult shit. Instead of stopping and listening to Evontra'vir and Allura, he said "no, I'm special, actually." And to be clear I think their motives were incredibly complicated and well-thought-out on Taliesin's part. It's not just because of his parents, it's not entirely selfish or out of heroics but those certainly did play a part, he did genuinely think it would help but he also ignored a number of warnings that it wouldn't. Again, I think the parallels between Ashton and FCG are glaringly obvious this episode, except Ashton hid their feelings with anger and FCG with a focus on everyone else's needs.

[mercair]

Goodbye Mercair

On January 7th of 2017, i posted my first song ever. It was a shitty self-insert megalo that never got any likes and barely got listened to. But i didn't really make it to get popular, i knew at the time that that would never happen and i was okay with it, because i didn't make that song for that. That first song was my way of thanking this community for helping me so much during a grim part of my life, to thank YOU, Undertale/Deltarune fan just for being there, creating stuff, and making people happy... I wanted to pay back the happiness this community gave me, and it has been like that ever since.

But now i realize, after 7 years, that... I'm not needed here. Whether i'm here or not, people would still be happy. People would have banger songs to listen to and characters to obsese over, without me. And that's wonderful! I enjoy seeing people happy more than i enjoy seeing myself. Just like in real life too, i'm the kind of person that can disappear from earth, and almost nobody would notice. But it's not like i can blame them, in the last 7 years i've been here i barely talked to anybody, i barely interacted and i barely got any friends.

And also, i'll just never be able to pay my debts with this community. I owe you guys so much, but nothing of what i do will ever be enough, not for me at least. And now i just have nothing to offer. I have no new ideas, i'll have no way of composing in what seems like months at this point, and i just lost my motivation. I've ran out of excuses to justify my presence in this place.

But also, in all honesty... After 7 years of creating stuff, even though i told myself that i never did it for popularity... I just thought i would stop feeling like a nobody, and that i'd stop feeling jealous of everyone else's success on this community. Is that ungrateful of me? Am i being greedy and not appreciative enough of what i got? Honestly, that's another reason of why i decided to leave; i'm just so secretly jealous of every other famous person in this fandom, i just think it'd be unfair for you guys to have a person like me around here. Ungrateful, greedy, jealous.

So i decided it's just time. To give up. To leave.

Once i'm done writing this letter, it'll be over. I'll stop being a musician, and i'll stop being an artist too. But please don't be sad about that. I don't want you to be sad. I want you to keep being happy, living in this fandom, like always. Keep making banger tracks, keep making cool art whether it's of your favorite characters or your own awesome ocs, keep talking to your friends and the people who love you, and overall, just forget about me. Forget about all of this. All my creations, all my characters, songs and concepts, they're not worthy of your praise. But everyone else's stuff is. So please, don't remember me or else i won't be able to leave this place in peace.

And now, i guess the question people are more interested in right now is "What will happen to all your stuff then?" Well, as some may have noticed, i've already taken down all of my original tracks from my soundcloud account, except for the covers/songs i made for other people and collabs, which are still up, since they're either not my characters, or i just wasn't the only one that worked on it, and it would be unfair to delete it. The soundcloud account will soon go unnamed, and i'll erase any connection to me it has, so people will be able to listen to those songs, without my name in it. As for my Tumblr and Twitter account... I'm now debating on whether or not to delete them, or just do the same and erase my name from both of them. I also gotta point out the possibility of me regreting this decision, but even if i do, i'm most likely not coming back.

So that's it. But before i go, i want to apologize. For everything.

I'm sorry i wasn't the best at what i did.

I'm sorry if my music wasn't good enough to make you smile or bang your head to it.

I'm sorry if my artistic abilities never catched your eye.

I'm sorry that i was never able to make a character you could obsess over.

I'm sorry if i was just too awkward and unfunny when talking to you.

I'm sorry if i was never able to become your friend and be someone you could talk to on the daily.

And most of all, i'm sorry for thinking that i could be like you. That i could be one of you.

All of you are so talented... SO incredibly talented and such good people... You're all legitimatlly amazing, and don't let people tell you otherwise. You're all gonna do great stuff in the future with the skills you have now, i guarantee it.

Well, i have to go now.

Thank you. For everything, and for what you did for me so many years ago. Thanks to you, i managed to be happy for the last 7 years of my life.

Goodbye UTDR.

[yayakoishii]

Control | Henry Legolant

Fandom: Black Clover

Pairing: Henry Legolant x GN! Reader

Word Count: 1.8k

Genre: Fluff. I don't think there's much, if a slight pinch, of angst?

Summary: To be able to be close to you, Henry has to learn to control his magic absorption.

A/n: Hellow!! First off, I just want to say that I never expected to actually write for this fandom, nor did I think Henry would be the first character (I legit love so many of them much much more than I do Henry) but this was the first cute idea that really struck me and I had time so here it is! :D I'm sorry if anyone is OOC, I'm not familiar with writing these characters yet.

This fic was inspired by that one scene in Ep. 113 (or was it 112?) where Henry says to Asta that he would love to meet the others when he learns to control his magic absorption.

also available on ao3!

"Henry!"

There you were again, with your bright, warm smile and genuine excitement to see him. When was the last time anyone was ever excited to see Henry? As much as Asta liked coming around to meet him, it was different from you. You, whose presence itself was like a spell of comfort, always met him like you had waited for it the entire time you had been away.

And maybe it was wishful thinking on his part, that you would want to meet him so much, but it made him so happy. That there was someone in this world who wanted to be around him freely. Everyone in the Black Bulls was kind and looked out for him, now that they knew about him, but nobody frequented his room as much as you did. You would visit atleast once a day, even if it sometimes took you a long time to find his room, except for the days when you were off on missions. Henry couldn't explain the empty feeling pressing on his heart on such days, where he spent every minute wondering if you were doing okay and when you would return.

You would always come back, relatively unharmed because your magic was more of the defensive type. But you didn't have a crazy amount of magic power and you weren't magic-less like Asta. This meant that every time you came to visit him, you would have to stay out of the doorway, far enough where he couldn't accidentally siphon your mana away. Even from that distance, he could sometimes see the cuts and bruises you sported, covered in salves or bandages.

You would tell him everything about your missions. Henry couldn't go outside and he couldn't go on missions but they way you vividly described everything, it made him feel like he was right there with you. You talked about all sorts of stuff, from the funny and crazy things the other members did to some of your personal feelings and thoughts. Henry couldn't help but feel a connection to you.

You were patient. You had to be a saint with the amount of patience you had; you had to, or else how would you be able to spend all the time you spent with him? Henry knew that he didn't speak fast enough or even at a normal pace, so having a conversation with him was not easy. But you always looked genuinely interested in what he had to say and waited for him to say it all. It had upset him so much once that he had nearly cried in front of you.

"I… just.. want… to… speak… pro-perly," he had grit out, frustrated with himself. Why couldn't he speak normally? If he kept doing this, wouldn't you get tired of him? "Don't… go… away… I want… you… to… always… stay…"

It was the closest he had gotten to revealing what he felt. That was the first time you had stepped inside his room, ignored the magic absorption and looked him straight in the eye up-close.

"I'm not going anywhere," you had said, a little breathless from the mana draining out of you. "I told you. Take your time and say what you want to. I want to hear it, and I won't go anywhere until I've heard it."

You eventually had to back off to your usual spot lest you blacked out from the mana loss. But that was the closest you had been to him and ever since then, he couldn't help but want it. He wanted to be close to you, to be able to talk to you like a normal person. He didn't want anything more– hoping for you to touch him was practically a fantasy that would never happen.

For all your kindness and compassion and genuine heart, Henry didn't think you could ever love him back the way he did you. And that was completely okay. He was fine watching you, feeling you from a distance – as long as you were happy and smiling, he would take what you were ready to give.

He just wanted to be able to talk to you properly, just a couple feet in between, instead of the large distance. For that, he needed to control his magic absorption. It wasn't like he hadn't tried (hadn't he been trying for his whole life at this point?) but your smiling face was a better motivator than any he had ever had.

He told Asta about his wish, the other guy already knowing about Henry's feelings for you. Asta had shot him a grin and a thumbs-up and said, "I have the perfect plan!"

That's how Henry started his secret training sessions with Gordon, Grey and Gauche. The latter had to be convinced a little but eventually stopped complaining when he realised that he could wax his poetry about Marie to Henry without being interrupted or told off while helping him out.

Every day, diligently, Henry put his all into trying to control his magic absorption. The progress was slow but he kept his goal in mind – it wasn't just you, after all. You were the first person he had wanted so badly to be close to, but the rest of the Black Bulls were also present in his head. He wanted to be able to enjoy and party with them too. He wanted to watch you be happy in their midst.

Henry practised on the three of them, aided by Asta's encouragement (which was mostly just yelling and doing push-ups in the corner as a weird form of training solidarity) and slowly but surely, his magic absorption zone reduced.

It took him months, but none of them gave up. Even on the hard days, when it felt futile, the rest would try to cheer him up. And then you would come, oblivious to the whole debacle going on under your nose. Your mere presence was uplifting. He could do this. If he wanted to be able to be around you, then he would have to put in effort. All that hard work for months culminated into him finally gaining control over his magic absorption.

The first time Grey managed to get close enough to press her palm against his own, the both of them had nearly cried. He did it. He managed to control it. All that time he spent on it had been worth it. Now all he had to do was wait for you to come to his room. He would surprise you for once, instead of it being the other way round.

You had surprised him with a gift on his birthday.

"It's not much," you had said shyly, handing him the scarf you had crocheted yourself. You had pressed it into his hands at the risk of draining yourself, "but happy birthday, Henry. I am so glad that you were brought into this world all those years ago. I'm glad I got to meet you."

He had been too choked up with tears to say anything. What could he have said anyway? Nothing could have done justice to explain what he felt about you. He didn't think he would ever get to hear someone say that they're grateful he was born. Frankly, he had never understood the point of birthdays until you said that.

Now, it was his chance to surprise you. To show you what you meant to him. The effect of your presence in his life.

•

The anticipation for you to return from your mission was worse than usual. He couldn't wait, feeling the impatience bouncing around inside him. When you finally appeared on the other side of his doorway, he sprang out of the bed as fast as he could. You startled but didn't step back.

You didn't know about his control. But you were willing to risk the draining effect if it was something so important to Henry that he was actually getting close to you on his own. Usually, he would be the one to tell you to stay away so if he was coming to you, then it meant it was something equally serious or important. So you waited– for him and for your magic to drain.

Except it never happened. With every step Henry took towards you, you couldn't feel the familiar feeling of mana being drained out of you. Your eyes widened in shock.

"I… learned… how to… control… it," Henry gave you a weak smile, walking closer until he was just two feet away. "Gauche… Gordon… Grey… and… Asta… helped… me… do it. We… prac-tised… for… months. I… wanted… to… talk… with you… closely… like… every-one… does. I… really… wanted…you…"

He cut himself off, cheeks pinking slightly. He couldn't do it. Even after all his effort, he couldn't tell you his real feelings. What if it ruined what you two had? What if you stopped visiting him because you didn't feel the same? Henry wasn't greedy. He was happy with how things were.

So he focused instead on whether you liked his surprise. He looked up, his light blue hair shifting out of the way as he took in your tear-stained face. Your hands were covering your mouth and you were shaking. Before Henry could ask you if you were okay, you wrapped yourself around him.

The sudden touch was overwhelming; your scent was everywhere and it was like all his senses were flooded with you, you, you. Henry nearly lost his composure and his control on the magic absorption was about to slip– but the mere thought that you would stop embracing him made him rigid. He held a tight grasp on the power; he was only controlling the magic through the sheer willpower of wanting to feel you against him. His mind was in shambles.

"You did it, you did it," you were mumbling, sniffing into his chest. Henry was sure that you could hear his heart thudding in there with how close you were. He couldn't see your face, only the top of your head but he let his arms wrap around you gently, like you were a fragile piece of glass.

All he had wanted was to close the distance. He had already gotten so much more than he had thought; you were holding him tightly, like you were scared he would slip from your fingers.

It felt like all too soon (and yet it had felt like forever) when you let him go and stepped back to look at him, your face flushed with embarrassment. Henry was pretty sure his face was much, much worse. He probably looked like all his dreams came true at once. (They did.) (You hugged him !!)

"S- Sorry," you mumbled, looking up at him shyly. Was it possible to die from seeing something too adorable? Henry felt close to it. "I should have asked you first, but… I have wanted to do that for so long."

All the practice confessions Henry had stammered through in front of Asta flew out the window at your admission. The way you were looking at him right now… Henry didn't need you to say anything out loud. For once, he let himself hope that you felt the same way– and he let himself believe it too.

"Me… too…"

°•❀•°

All likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated! ♡