#larry angst

[cc-horan28]

Be My Valentine - 9

The Wind, It Held Your Soul

(T) 1.7k

WW2 AU Soldier!Louis Tomlinson x Doctor!Harry Styles (3/3)

Tw death, implied time period accurate homophobia

Harry swallowed, lump in his throat firmly lodged, hands shaking as he glanced down at the little strip of paper.

18 words. They would be emblazoned across his mind forever. 18 words that changed everything. He still remembered the look Gemma had given him as she handed him the paper. 

OR

Harry is widowed in a time he cannot even accept it in public.

A/N: A huge thank you to Ash for helping me figure out the ending! And I love you Nashie and Anna for being there when I was having breakdowns over this! And ofc, ty to Akeyla for holding this fest and these amazing prompts just ah! 

Title from Louis’ ‘Holding On To Heartache’!

Harry swallowed, lump in his throat firmly lodged, hands shaking as he glanced down at the little strip of paper.

18 words. They would be emblazoned across his mind forever. 18 words that changed everything. He still remembered the look Gemma had given him as she handed him the paper. 

He had run from the stables as fast as he could when he’d heard the cook, Mrs O’Leary calling out to him. It had been months since he’d been sent back after a shell landed at the hospital Harry was working in, onfield. He had been waiting so long. He had thought it was a letter- from-

Louis. His Louis.

A sob racked his body as he bent over, paper crumpling as his fist closed down, nails digging into his palm. The pain was the only thing grounding him right now. 

He had to give it everything he had to hold back from screaming. He squeezed his eyes shut, pawing at his eyes with his closed fist. Louis won’t like- wouldn’t- Another wave of anger passed through him as he sobbed, not caring if anyone heard him.

His Louis. The telegram wasn’t even sent to him. Of course it wouldn’t. To them they were nothing. To them they didn’t- couldn’t even exist. None of that mattered. None of it mattered. He wouldn’t even get to hold a funeral for him. He couldn’t face the idea of burying an empty coffin, of having to pretend he was just a coworker- a friend. Like he wasn’t there for the only man he’d ever loved. 

He had no idea how long he stayed curled up like that, lost in thoughts of LouisLouisLouis. It was the cold that finally forced him to sit up, head freezing from where he had been resting it against the glass.

He couldn’t even face moving away from the bay window, going near the fireplace. That would involve seeing Louis’ sofa. 

Harry remembered how he would climb onto him, slotting himself onto the single-seater, legs tangled with his, toasting crumpets by the fire, sipping the tea Harry didn’t even like but had anyway, just to keep Louis company.

This bay window was Louis’ idea. ‘So we can sit together properly’, he used to say with that grin of his, eyes all crinkled up, ‘Without you squashing me,’- Harry ran his hand over the soft leather, smoothened by the years of use. Everything was his, wasn’t it-

He exhaled shudderingly, distantly surprised when he saw it fogging up in front of him. 

His face was cold, tear tracks feeling icy on his skin. He eased his grip on the paper, hugging one of the pillows to his chest as he glanced down,

WESTERN UNION

DEEPLY REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT CAPTAIN LOUIS TOMLINSON IS OFFICIALLY REPORTED AS KILLED IN ACTION JULY NINTH. 

Tears welled up, clouding his vision as he clutched the pillow closer, burying his face in it. He cried loudly, beyond caring if anyone heard him, wailing out Louis’ name plaintively.

He breathed deeply when he pulled back, feeling slightly dizzy. He could have sworn he smelled jasmine and cinnamon. Hints of the Brumes perfume Louis liked- had liked- to wear at home.

Sure, it had said pour femme on the little bottle, he thought with a small, sad smile; but Louis never cared. Neither of them did.

He vaguely registered the insistent knocking on the door and curled up with his back to it, holding on to the pillow.

“Harold. Harry, please.” he heard Gemma say, slowly, like she was measuring each word out, but the slight tremor in her voice gave her away “Harry, don’t isolate yourself. I know- I understand you need space. And time. But this isn’t what Louis would have wanted,”

Harry barely registered what her next words were, all coherent thoughts drowned out by the rush of anger he felt. 

“Don’t you take his name, not just to console me,” he shouted, stalking across the room and throwing the door open, “Don’t take his name, Gemma. Not when you brought me this godforsaken piece of paper.” He waved the said paper around, tears milling in his eyes despite the anger he felt. He knew his anger at his sister wasn’t justified, but he couldn’t care less.

“Don’t,” he repeated, voice breaking as he collapsed onto the ground, sitting on his haunches with his head in his hands. 

“Louis,” he cried, slumping onto the ground, legs a tangle, the carpet cold under him. 

He felt Gemma crouch beside him, whispering something that he didn’t quite understand over his own voice, but he stood up when she did, letting himself be led to the sofa by the fireplace. 

She didn’t say anything, just gently combed through his hair as he stared at Louis’ sofa. 

Louis’ sofa

It hit him at once, and this time he couldn’t even choke out any sounds. Louis’ sofa which wasn’t his anymore. Where he wouldn’t sit anymore. 

Harry was grateful for her silence, her company. He wasn’t sure what he would do if he was left alone right now. He couldn’t fathom why he had wanted her to leave. Not her too-

He felt tears silently run down his face, gruelling visions of Louis alone somewhere, over the Channel, lying in a field threatening to swallow him. He tried to push the thoughts away, curling up into his sister, pulling his feet up, and taking shaky breaths to try and calm himself.

They sat there, Harry quietly hiccupping as he felt his tears dry up, only to be replaced by anger. It wasn’t aimed at Gemma this time, though.

“I didn’t even get the telegram,” he said, voice raspy already, “They didn’t even send it to me. My husband is gone, and they couldn’t even send me a fucking telegram,” His voice was rising, and he felt himself shaking with the intensity of all that he felt. 

“Harry,” Gemma breathed out, sighing deeply and choosing not to say anymore. Harry needed to get it out of his system. 

“They couldn’t because that would mean acknowledging us. They’re too busy pretending we don’t fucking exist and throwing those who protest into jails. I don’t want to erase him, Gem. I don’t want to erase us,” he broke off, closing his eyes as he bent over, forehead resting on his knees as he finally let himself think of Louis, fresh tears streaming down his cheeks. 

“I’m not going to pretend,” he said, toying with the congealed dried eggs on his plate, like it was the most natural conversation to have. Like he hadn’t not said a word for two days. “We’ll hold a proper service for him. And I won’t pretend. I won’t talk about how great a person he was, or what a good soldier he was,” 

His voice was raspy from disuse, throat raw from all the crying and screaming he’d done, bouncing between mad anger and complete desolation. He took the glass of orange juice Gemma offered with a silent nod.

She had been an angel, a constant presence, never invading his space, giving him the time he needed to process while still being a rock he could anchor to.

He took a small sip, ignoring the tears that were threatening to spill. He would have time for all that later, but he wanted Louis to have a proper send-off, and so would his sisters. And he knew Louis would have done the same, had the tables been turned. Had it been him killed on the Somme.

He quickly brushed the tears away, almost angry at himself. 

“It’s okay if there’s another service, an official one, for everyone else. But I won’t attend it,” he said as firmly as he could in his state, “Everyone who knew, who cared about him- about us- we’ll have a separate service.” 

That was all he could muster up the strength to say. Gemma stood up, patting his shoulder and kissing his cheek lightly. “He would be proud,” she whispered, “And so am I. I’ll give you some time. Ring for me if you want to talk,”

He pushed the plate away, watching Gemma’s retreating figure silently. He folded his arms and buried his head in them. 

He was used to the silence by now.

He closed his eyes as he threw the last handful of dirt, face tilted up as he let the sun warm his face. The tears coursing down his cheeks still stung against the wind, but the golden glow he saw from behind his eyelids made it just a bit more bearable. He wasn’t sure what he would have done if it was grey and rainy.

Sunny days were Louis’ favorite, Harry thought, biting down on his lower lip. He used to love heading off to Kensington, getting some fresh rolls on their way there and having them by the pond. They always had to sit just a bit too far away, and still got suspicious glares from passersby, but Harry wouldn’t have had it any other way.

None of it changed the fact that Louis was gone and Harry doubted if he would ever entirely come to terms with it. With never seeing his eyes crinkle with laughter, or hear him singing his versions of Vera Lynn’s songs. With never waking up to him sipping his awful unsweetened tea next to him, newspaper rustling as he bent down to kiss him. With never seeing him again.

No, he couldn’t think like that. Louis was always the romantic between them, talks of a beautiful after, free from pain and discrimination and everything they hated being brought up whenever they got even vaguely theological, or drunk, or both.

He couldn’t help but chuckle weakly, thinking back to those evenings together. 

Some day, he would see Louis again. The jasmine in the air, with not a bloom in sight was a testament to that.

They would never fade away. But for now, the silence would have to do.

A/N: again, I'm so sorry i don't know what possessed me to write this. Don't go and reread the first post. No matter what

Reblogs are always appreciated 💕

[voulezloux]

“One kiss.”

Harry raises an eyebrow. “One kiss?”

Louis nods. “One kiss and no more.”

“I’m going to want more than one kiss, though.”

“Too bad, so sad, you’re only getting one,” Louis sasses. “Better hurry up, this offer is going fast.”

“we should kiss.” so they kiss.

your right now, your forever, your last call, your whatever (6.3k)

written as apart of @1daboficfest

graphic made by the lovely @nouies

[ivy28larry28]

Anyone have this downloaded??

It was removed from ao3 😭

[bottomhaztoplou]

that [boy] was raised by a butterfly (9.6k) by DaddyAlphaLouisBabyOmegaHarry // bottomhaztoplou | @paranormalbabydoll

Louis has endured tragedy. When he allows himself a rare frivolity, he finds something worth living for.

Read it here on AO3!

(Collage info: Collage made by me on Canva using pictures from Pexels, Unsplash and Google.)

[cwrotes]

walked through my door but it felt nothing like home ; larry

long distance au | happy ending | one shot | 9.5k | spanish

summary: “louis ha estado de viaje por un largo tiempo, y harry intenta mantener su vida en orden y pasear a su perro y no echarlo tanto de menos. la cama está terriblemente vacía, fumar solo resulta ser demasiado triste y louis vuelve a casa antes de lo que esperaba.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“El asunto está, en que no lo ha hecho. En realidad, Harry no tiene ninguna notificación de parte del castaño, ni de nadie en general, y su entrecejo se frunce ante el desconcierto que eso le provoca. Normalmente responde sus mensajes sin falta, y lo máximo que se ha demorado en enviarle algo de vuelta son quince o veinte minutos, si todo se extrema. Sin embargo, han pasado alrededor de cuarenta y cinco, y no tiene una sola palabra de Louis.

Aprieta los labios dándole una excusa. Quizás todavía no se ha levantado. Después de todo, la diferencia horaria es de una hora, así que para él todavía es temprano —¿no tanto? Para Harry casi serán las once—, o tal vez debe de estar ocupado con el trabajo, o probablemente su colega lo ha llevado a desayunar como ha sucedido en varias ocasiones, especialmente luego de haber tenido una semana exitosa en el trabajo y los negocios que han ido a atender.

Sea cual sea el motivo de su falta de presencia, Harry decide darle el beneficio de la duda prefiriendo ser el novio tranquilo esta vez aun cuando su corazón se está retorciendo en esa extrañeza y su constante melancolía. (…)”

[track-five]

pins and screws

“You’d think about it? You wouldn’t just say ‘oh yeah, H, you can absolutely go fly to your husband to support and care for and love him while he’s in debilitating pain and getting major surgery because you’re married and that’s what husbands do for each other’? You’d have to think about it, Jeff?”

“There are a lot of moving parts, H, and-”

“I don’t care how many parts are moving, just make them stop."

louis breaks his arm for the fourth time in his life, and the husbands are absolutely fed up with following the rules. faith in the future bonus track: paradise

Words: 15210, Chapters: 3/?, Language: English

Fandoms: One Direction (Band)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Jeff Azoff, Mitch Rowland

Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson

Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Married Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Hurt/Comfort, Caretaking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Album: Faith in the Future (Louis Tomlinson), Injury, Broken Bones, Hurt Louis Tomlinson, Hospitals, Protective Harry Styles, louis falls after ono but harry's at the forum, the stunt is over, the leech is gone

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43304592/chapters/108851586

[theratcircus]

Do you ever think about what would’ve happened if Larry’s first task as an apprentice had been to finish Adam’s game? What if Amanda hadn’t killed him? What if after everything, John made him go back into the bathroom to let Adam have a fair game this time, only for him to be too worried about making sure Larry got out alive & safe to fight for himself, only to realize Larry tricked him & wasn’t in this game to begin with

(credit to @hellboys for the gifs I saved near each other only to be like…huh which spawned this Thought)

[thelavendrhaze]

fic: i love you (it's ruining my life)

author: wildestdreams

rating: explicit

word count: 40.3k

“You’ve been teasing me all night, looking like a fucking dream, and the minute you get me alone, all of that attitude and your games go right out the window, don’t they?” Louis asked, voice low. “Why do you do it?”

Harry grinned, cheeks warm as his palms rested over Louis’ shoulders. “It keeps things interesting, doesn’t it?”

The alpha watched him closely, gaze dark, while he stroked one hand down Harry’s side before settling over the dip of his waist. “I can never tell with you.”

“Tell what?”

“If you like me or not.”

Harry swallowed thickly. “I’m not supposed to like you. I’m supposed to just want to fuck you.”

or

A situationship AU where Harry is one of the most sought-after omega supermodels in the world and Louis is the alpha lead singer of the indie supergroup, The Rogue. The last thing either of them wants is to fall in love.

fic tag / twitter / playlist

[ffhhfff]

"I am cruel, I am gentle, I can make you laugh"

.

.

[thekingofspin]

when your stressed and sad do you ever just think "I'm due a ____ phase again" like I'm due a night at the museum phase again I was so happy back then and I need the stress relief right now

[voulezloux]

Friday nights are reserved for one thing and one thing only: good old fashioned American football. Harry’s never been a big fan of football, only goes to the games because he’s required to, however he does enjoy getting to interact with his fellow band kids in the band section of the stands.

The fact he gets to ogle Louis in his bibbers and jacket is just a plus.

the marching band au only one person (and that was me) asked for.

defying stars (9.2k)

written as apart of @1dtourdeficfest

graphic made by the talented @alwaysxlarrie

[ivy28larry28]

The link to #8 doesn’t work. Does anyone have it downloaded??

Hi! Could you rec me your favorite enemies to lovers fics? Maybe some that are underrated? I mean if you rec me Unbelievers, I'll read it again for the twentieth time, but maybe there are some awesome ones out there I don't know about! xx

i tired to rec fics that are good but not super popular, but i don’t think there are many that haven’t been ‘discovered yet’, sorry :(

-kay

hate to love tag

1.  Learning to Breathe by youcomecrash (110k)

He’s playing football at one of the top universities in England and he should love everything about his life right now, but instead he’s moving backwards. How does your past fit into your present? Louis is still figuring it out.

2.  You Drive Me Round The Bend by TheCellarDoor (77k)

In which Louis is a spoilt rich kid who’s always on the phone while he drives and Harry is a struggling musician making his way down the mountain. It’s just a matter of time before they crash and burn.

3.  Off The Record by Tomlinsontoes (90k)

Louis is an out of control teen heartthrob, Harry is hired to get him back on track and they both hate each other while they secretly don’t.

“I’m not your personal assistant you know,” Harry says once he gets there and Louis lets him in and he shoves the bag into his hands. “I’m your publicist.”

“I know that,” Louis smiles a devilish grin patting Harry in the middle of his chest as he takes the bag, “but look at you personally assisting me,” he says looking in the bag and pulling out the Cheetos. I also know that my PA turns his phone on silent at night, and clearly, you don’t. Waiting for a booty call or something?” Louis says turning on his heels and scurrying over to his sofa and plopping down. Harry swears he sees a puff of orange dust soar into the air when Louis opens the bag. He’s amazed that couch is as clean as it looks.

4.  can i not like you for a while? by larryshares (43k)

louis tomlinson is awful. harry is just as difficult, and they’re both terrible to each other. it makes being in the same acapella group together quite complicated.

5.  Hate Me To The Moon by harrystlesandstuff (83k)

The last thing Harry wanted was to spend his entire summer stuck with his dad’s new fiancée and her kids. He wants no more when he learns she’s a very religious dictator, raising a sixteen year old nun and a clean cut potential priest ass kisser.

Everything takes a slightly different turn, however, when Harry finds out his future step-brother is actually the rude stranger he caught sucking off a guy in a pub, far from the reserved Christian his mom thinks he is…

AU where Harry is a sexy nerd, Louis is a great actor, and they both pretend to hate each other’s guts to convince themselves they’re not feeling things future step-brothers shouldn’t feel…

6.  I Hate You by mediwitch3 (35k)

Harry and Louis hate each other, a lot, but they pretend to be friends for the sake of their careers. One night, during an argument, they bang. They can’t keep their hands off each other after that.

7.  Magical Soup by gloria_andrews (28k)

Slytherin prefect Louis Tomlinson’s seventh year at Hogwarts takes an immediate turn for the worse when he’s made to be potions partners with Harry Styles, Hufflepuff’s resident heartthrob and class clown. Louis has always considered Styles to be a terrible show-off who coasts by on his charm and good looks, but the more they work together, the more he questions that idea. As term goes on, will Louis be able to admit to himself that he might actually like Harry Styles after all… and maybe, just maybe, as more than a friend?

8.  baby we’ll be fine (all we gotta do is be brave and be kind) by aloequeera (146k)

Louis hates Harry. Harry hates being hated. First aid kits and kittens make it better.

They’re both way too fucked up for any all-encompassing friendship, and when you put them together, it’s fucked up squared.Louis is too acerbic to not hurt people, and Harry is too passive aggressive to stand up for himself.Louis is too nosy and controlling, Harry is too secretive and distrustful.Louis is too brash and loud, Harry is too contained and reserved.Louis is too openly bitchy, Harry is too convincingly fake.

It’s not surprising he spent two years hating the kid.

9.  i’ll be yours to keep by midnights (17k)

louis should’ve thought a lot more about who he said his fake boyfriend is, especially since he and his “significant other” kinda hate each other. most of the time.

10.  Court-Ordered by kikikryslee (10k)

Louis sighed. “I don’t think I’m his type.”“You’re everyone’s type,” Niall said. “Everyone likes you.”“But we only just stopped sort of hating each other. What if I mess it all up?”“Wow. You really do like him.”“I do not.”“Yeah, you do,” Niall grinned. “You like a tree hugger. Who saw it coming?”—Or, the one where pot-smoking Louis and SeaWorld protester Harry both get community service, and don’t get along at all. Until they do.

more / request / fulfilled requests

[bottomhaztoplou]

Two Hearts In One Home (WIP) by DaddyAlphaLouisBabyOmegaHarry // bottomhaztoplou / @paranormalbabydoll Two omegas fall in love... What could possibly go wrong?

Read it here on AO3!

(Collage info: Collage was made by me on Canva using pics from Google.)

[cwrotes]

the way that you see me ; larry

tw: non-con mention | mpreg | angst | one shot | 11.2k | spanish

summary: “harry sufre de abuso sexual por parte de su jefa de trabajo, ahora él se siente sucio y no toca más a louis su novio que tiene cinco meses de embarazo, después de casi dos meses harry decide hablar.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Manos.

Manos frías.

Manos ajenas.

Manos completamente desconocidas.

Manos que se tatúan en su piel con la ayuda de uñas insistentes, largas, insoportables.

Manos que recorren lugares prohibidos.

Manos que recorren lugares que jamás quiso que fueran tocados.

Lugares.

Lugares con dueño.

Un dueño que no se encuentra presente.”

[track-five]

later.

“Harry, whose songs get played on radio? Who’s done multiple world tours? Who’s won a Grammy? Coachella, stadiums, Madison Square Garden, - that’s you, not me.”

“That means nothing. It doesn’t make me better than you.”

“What does it make you, then?”

“Just…different.” Louis let out a sharp breath through his nose at the non-answer. “I’m-I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

louis really wants to have kids, but harry has to give him a reality check. (harry's house track four: as it was)

featuring rave reviews from readers: "this is the worst thing i've ever read" and "why would you create this atrocity" from brave guest user ur mom

Words: 4284, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: One Direction (Band)

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson

Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson

Additional Tags: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Established Relationship, Married Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, flashback to baby boyfriends era, Emotional Louis Tomlinson, Comforting Harry Styles, Domestic Fluff, Crying, May 2022, just when you think it's gonna be fluffy...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/41972025

[cj-the-human-disaster]

YALL!!! I KNOW IT CANNOT JUST BE ME!!! But the camera going to Larry after Marian’s proposal?! IM DEAD!! I LOVE THIS!!!