#lance stories

[linipik]

one step forward, two steps back 

first | < Part 1 | Part 2|  tbc>

[egophiliac]

I feel like F/P/S was still a pretty weird one, even by Lance's standards.

sorry for (in an ironic twist) not doing much Ride Kamens art now that it's actually started; I've been pretty slow going through it and I feel weird posting about things I'm not caught up on! though I'm. definitely gonna have to set aside some time to actually get through episode 13, after what they posted today. (w-what did they do to my Leon) (NOBODY TELL ME I HAVE TO FIND OUT ON MY OWN) (LEOOOOOOOON)

[morbethgames]

NEW UPDATE IS OUT!

I’M FREE! FREEEEEE! 32 MOSTLY UNIQUE VARIATIONS OF INTIMATE SCENES DONE!

Clears throat

So, like stated above, the update is out! I’ll leave a list of patch notes, but this is majorly a bigger one for Alzarez and Lance romancers. The Lance extra story “Movie and Dessert” is being released with this update. You will need to replay the game. I’m sorry about that. BUT it’s because I added in new variables to the train scene so that stuff said there could possibly be brought up in this new scene! Reactivity, yay!

Along with that, you’ll get to read Alvarez’s flashback scene which is the actual end of Chapter 4. Along with a lot of little goodies. All in all, there was about… 44k-45k words added into this update? 40k of them are entirely optional and only happen if you choose to hang out with Lance after Alvarez’s flashback scene scene.

Not gonna lie, 1 variation in I was confident it would take two weeks. 8 variations in I was a bit tired but still energized to get this scene done. 16 variations in I had to step away for a couple of days to not let my brain melt. By the time I hit mid-twenties in variation for this scene, I was finding myself thinking that it just. wasn’t. worth it.

I have no idea if I’ll make the other intimate scenes this branching. It was honestly a lot of work. Like, a lot, it it was so fatiguing after a while, but I knew I had to get it done. IT’s also the reason I paused my patreon this month, because it wouldn’t be fair to charge people for something that they’re not getting early as promised in the rewards. This took way longer than I thought, so I wanted to just release it to everyone at once.

I do hope you guys enjoy it, and without further ado, here are the patch notes for this update.

Stay Brilliant, -Vi

Patch Notes:

“Movie and Dessert” Lance Extra Scene is finished.

Alvarez Flashback scene is finished.

Added a Text Box Investigation Tab in the Stats Screen.

You are now able to toggle between Text Box Investigations and regular choice script gameplay for TBI sequences.

You can now view the Text Box Investigation tutorial at any time via the stats screen.

Removed the Text Box Investigation Tutorial from chapter 4.

Added an option in the beginning of the game to Fade To Black during intimate scenes.

You can now pick asexual and aromantic as separate options, and they are not tied to each other.

Grammar edits and fixes (thank you to all who report them).

🛡️Patreon | Forum Page | Demo Link🛡️

[rcci]

He said he's sorry. I forced him to do it

Ah yes, I guess this is the continuation of this.

I'm not sure, but it could be translated as "I'm sorry, I didn't mean that." I'm obviously using a translator

[lancehenriksen]

Omg, thank you, that’s delightful. Tiny man, too big suit, just trying to make some cash

I have a copy of Not Bad For A Human! (I guess I would know this story if I actually read it 🤣 ) Coincidentally, my husband bought it a few years ago, before my Lance brainrot set it. I put off reading it while I had the chance to hear his stories from him, and now I keep putting it off like ‘well idk, maybe I’ll get a chance to chat again’ 😅

EDIT: I just realized this took place the year before the Ginsberg photos, if anyone wants to picture this absolute baby servicing ice cream

I’m sorry, JFK?? What?!? Please tell me this story

Apparently this took place during a time when Lance was constantly on the move doing odd jobs to get by. And one time he somehow landed a job in Phoenix doing catering at an event featuring JFK (a pre-election rally maybe?)

So Lance gets to serve the dessert and he's pretty much still a scruffy kid at this point, so to look presentable for the event they put him in this tuxedo that's way too big for him. Like the cuffs go over his knuckles and the shoulders are too wide (I like to imagine him looking like David Byrne in his big suit).

He's serving ice cream pies or something like that to the attendees. No formal training, just unceremoniously plopping them on their plates. And yeah, he serves ice cream to JFK. I believe he got a thank you..

As I mentioned JFK wasn't president yet, but later he gave a speech at the event that captivated Lance. Like he got a glimpse of the icon he was to become..

This story was mentioned in Not Bad for a Human and he shared it during a panel or interview (that's where I first heard the story) ((but there's no way I can find it again))

[abd-illustrates]

Did you say at one point that Lance and Bandys types were someone who could kick their ass or was that a fever dream??

If I did say that about Bandy once upon a time, I don't think it's quite how I'd describe him nowadays after having fleshed out his character more while trying to chip away at the story as a whole haha --

Right on the money for Lance tho 💪

[eightdoctor]

my eda recs :) for anyone interested in getting into this series

i am prefacing this post with the note that i am an avid completionist and generally dislike telling people to skip certain books unless it's a john peel novel or placebo effect. however i understand telling people to read 74 novels is not at all accessible and i need you all to read. these books. please. please

this post is going to be long as shit i know it so i'm putting it ↓ here. books that can be skipped because theyre a bit shit will be colored red, ones that you Can Skip but are good/have some important character or plot bits in will be orange, and ones that are sooo good and necessary and the best books ever will be green. unfortunately i think a lot of the ones colored orange should be colored green but i know restraint. i can stay my hand. kind of

also i should say that i primarily read these for the characters - the plots themselves come second. so lots of my opinions come from the standpoint of which books have good characterizations. basically some of the ones that i color green would probably be skippable if any normal person were reading them but i'm insane!! and this is my list so fuck you!!!

The Eight Doctors by Terrance Dicks: ah my color trichotomy has bitten me in the ass on the first book. because truth be told i still haven't finished this one (nor have i really felt the need to yet), yet it introduces the first companion in the series, sam jones, and contains some other entertaining parts like the doctor getting caught with cocaine. as far as introductory books go it's meh

Vampire Science by Kate Orman and Jonathan Blum: this book. i truly can't sing my praises any louder than i already have. orman & blum took the character of the eighth doctor as portrayed by paul mcgann in a few measly minutes of screen time into a fully fleshed out, compelling and complex character. if you're a fan of the eighth doctor but aren't interested in reading all of the EDAs you have to read this one at the Very Least. it begins, as all good stories do, in a gay bar. it features vampire squirrels, the doctor with kittens, and the doctor infodumping on the beauty of science in a speech? conversation? that still touches me to this day, four years after i first read it.

The Bodysnatchers by Mark Morris: this book is Gross, and i mean that positively. mark morris held nothing back when describing how disgusting and putrid london was in the 1800s (he's primarily a horror writer, and that comes through rather clearly in this book). i genuinely enjoyed this novel a lot, but i know it's not for everyone because again, it's quite gory and disgusting

Genocide by Paul Leonard: don't you just want to see the doctor in a sun hat? being tortured for weeks on end? don't you want to examine his morality in termsof what species he thinks needs to be saved or doomed? jo grant is there

War of the Daleks by John Peel: fuck john peel all my homies hate john peel. for some reason all his books in this range contain daleks and it’s like…why. get some creativity. everyone else did. bitch

Alien Bodies by Lawrence Miles: this novel is So Good. it introduces faction paradox, the war in heaven plotline, humanoid tardises, and a couple of the most interesting & fun side characters in the whole range (homunculette and marieeee <3 cousin justineeee… aaaaaaahh). I shan’t spoil the entire conceit of the story but just know it’s. insane and fucked up and so so funny

Kursaal by Peter Anghelides: this is just a solid doctor who story, really. i wouldn’t call it imperative to the overarching plot of the novels (as tenuous as it is early on), but it’s an enjoyable enough read. it’s about an ancient race of alien werewolves underneath a theme park. what more can i say

Option Lock by Justin Richards: i recall enjoying the doctor and sam’s characterization in this one, and the story is like doctor strangelove meets, well, doctor who. it’s skippable, but i had fun reading it, and that’s really all you can ask for

Longest Day by Michael Collier: this is the start of the arc where sam gets separated from the doctor. actually the most tense and stressed i’ve been reading the edas was reading this and the next three books. it’s so dire, but it’s so so good, with incredible character moments from sam and the doctor. plus you have anstaar, nashaad with his metal legs, and some really fucked up body horror involving Time messing with people’s existences and driving ppl mad and stuff. people tend to either love this one or hate it from what i’ve seen, and i’m solidly in the former category. would definitely recommend 

Legacy of the Daleks by John Peel: ughhhhhhhh… ughhhhjhhhhhh i guess you have to read this one. i guess you have to. it’s definitely an improvement on his last book but still. daleks again john? really? whateverrrrr.. some important stuff happens to susan is in this one though. and the master as well. so if you care about either of those characters you should read this i suppose

Dreamstone Moon by Paul Leonard: a general rule of the edas is paul leonard always writes excellent books (in my opinion, anyway), and this is not the exception. sam and the doctor are still separated, but they’re in the same place and keep missing each other and its like UGGHHHH!!! UGHHH!!! but you have interesting commentary on capitalism’s exploitation and effective revolutionary action and all that stuff. also aloisse is an incredible character and i love her

Seeing I by Kate Orman and Jonathan Blum: HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOOD LIRD!!!!!!!!!!! kate and jon do it again, those crazy bastards. you know how every author loves torturing the shit out of eight? these guys take that and run with it in the opposite direction, asking the question what if the worst thing the doctor could go through isn’t agonizing torture, but rather just a lack of enrichment in his enclosure? what if he had to stay locked up in one building for three years and couldn’t escape for the life of him? meanwhile sam, now a refugee with no social support (as she technically shouldn’t exist in this time and location), has to deal with homelessness, and has to decide whether it’s better to have a stable, yet soulless corporate job - or do something that’s meaningful and benefits society. she’s at her best in this book for sure

Placebo Effect by Gary Russell: throws up. don’t read this because it is actually rhe worst book in the whole range and i’m not joking. sorry gary you’re a nice guy but i thought the arguments against evolution that went on for like 3 pages were extremely egregious and also plain wrong. you may look at this book and think “oh cool! Stacy and ssard from the comics are in this one!” well they’re there for like a paragraph and don’t do shit. so

Vanderdeken's Children by Christopher Bulis: really fun novel that’s pretty much the epitome of the classic doctor who question “wouldn’t that be really fucked up and crazy?” it also established the fact that the doctor told sam his real name which is really fun and awesome

The Scarlet Empress by Paul Magrs: much like paul leonard, paul magrs Never disappoints. this book is just so fucking fun. in essence, it’s a road trip story. they drive across a planet listening to abba and visiting lots of kooky places and picking up lots of wacky characters. it also deconstructs gender and self-identity and what it means to be an individual. a cyborg and a giant spider get lesbian married. aewsome 👍

The Janus Conjunction by Trevor Baxendale: i really debated on making this one skippable, i did. because while it doesn’t continue any of the established plots or themes or whatever, it does show the doctor breaking the laws of time to save his companion’s life, and that’s really cool we love that. there’s a lot of fun body horror too if you go for that sort of thing. and more giant spiders but these ones are different 

Beltempest by Jim Mortimore: ok honestly? i didn’t vibe with this one. i know some people really liked it but i felt as if the characterization was Off. some wacky wild stuff happens to sam though

The Face-Eater by Simon Messingham: <-doesn’t remember much of this one cuz i was high while reading it. i think it was a solid story though? 

The Taint by Michael Collier: yayyyyyyyy fitz is hereeeee my babyboy… lots of people don’t vibe with this one but i do. because i love fitz and everything he’s in and him and the doctor are such bastards to each other in the beginning it’s great. their repartee is genuinely so entertaining and really elevates the book for me, even if the plot itself is a bit mediocre. either way even if you don’t like it you have to read it because it introduces fitz. so there

Demontage by Justin Richards: telling you to skip this one would be a disservice. because technically it Is skippable, but it has some absolutely hilarious moments that really drive home the fact that fitz is Cringe. they’re on a space casino called vega in the far future and fitz dresses in a (from everyone else's perspective) old-fashioned tuxedo. he smokes indoors and everyone gives him nasty looks because he’s in the future and no one smokes inside. he asks for his cocktails shaken not stirred and the bartender fucking hates him. and he also accidentally gets involved in an assassination plot. but i suppose if you must skip it then go ahead… 

Revolution Man by Paul Leonard: mr leonard does it again. this is an excellent novel for both companions that begins with sam and the doctor engaging in leftist discourse with an anarchist and ends with the world almost ending. it happens.

Dominion by Nick Walters: you have to read this one just for the doctor’s first gay kiss. sorry i don’t make the rules. also it  just features a neat concept imo and has a great moment where the doctor punches a pillow in frustration and then sadly apologizes to it

Unnatural History by Kate Orman and Jonathan Blum: this book is one that i think every doctor who fan who’s ever gotten mad about canon not making sense should be forced at gunpoint to read. it’s a novel that’s essentially one big metacommentary on doctor who canon & why it Doesn’t Matter At All, Actually; the doctor was birthed and he was loomed and both are equally true and untrue. also features the iconic paragraph calling the doctor a (verbatim) “backrub slut”, as well as wrapping up the ongoing arc with sam jones hinted at in alien bodies and a few other books in a way that’ll have you side eyeing moffat very suspiciously

Autumn Mist by David A. McIntee: this one’s pretty good and has a couple great moments (fitz calling himself james bond, for one), but is, i think, ultimately skippable unless youre a world war 2 buff

Interference Books 1 & 2 by Lawrence Miles: nothing i can say will adequately put into words what these two novels made me feel, you hear me? absolutely nothing. good fucking god. jesus christ. holy fuck.. if i sat here listsing all the important and iconic moments in these books we’d be here all shitting day and this post is already obscenely long. read these 2 books. then read them again. 

The Blue Angel by Paul Magrs: ok i know i just said this but HOOOOOO..WHOA NELLY! the blue angel is easily in my top 5 edas. it literally heavily features a canon domestic au wherein the doctor is a “middle-aged gay man”. fitz says he wants to get laid by the doctor. the doctor’s mother is a mermaid. there’s off-brand spirk. someone turns into a giant squid. literally this book is so good they wrote a screenplay adaptation of it and a spinoff short story that you should also read

The Taking of Planet 5 by Simon Bucher-Jones and Mark Clapham: you’re going to be hearing this a lot from me but we Are entering the part of the series where it really takes off and gets sooo fucking good. anyway this novel is sooo fucking good and quite important to the plot and establishes stuff about the war in heaven and gallifrey so. read it. also there's ELDRITCH BEASTS!

Frontier Worlds by Peter Anghelides: i can’t tell you to skip this one because it’s so good. fitz goes by the alias frank sinatra & also talks like him for a solid portion of the book. we get excellent compassion moments. great doctor moments (including that Hot and Sexy dream he has about the tardis!) and all in all it’s a wonderful story

Parallel 59 by Stephen Cole and Natalie Dallaire: lots of stuff happens in this one, especially to fitz. by that i mean it gets referenced quite a bit later so i would recommend if you want to catch all the references. also a woman worked on this one so you already know eight is going to be written phenomenally and very sensually. 

The Shadows of Avalon by Paul Cornell: rather important development happens to compassion in this book (understatement). but it’s also a really good story in general with lots of memorable bits - paul cornell wrote one EDA and did a great job and then vanished from the range. it also has the BRIGADIER and his ROMANCE with MAB the BIG BOSOMED CELTIC QUEEN so like.. read it?? 

The Fall of Yquatine by Nick Walters: a pretty important thing happens to compassion in this one too (another understatement). also withnail & i references galore, fitz has a bad time (has he had a Good time for the past few books? questionable!), and the doctor spends time with a gay baker/contraband parts dealer

Coldheart by Trevor Baxendale: you could skip this one but why would you even want to? it’s literally one of compassion’s best stories and has plenty of excellent doctor and companion moments. it’s just fun and engaging and an outstanding doctor who story. and, as always, fitz is effortlessly cringe as ever <3

The Space Age by Steve Lyons: this one’s just boring and kinda stupid. nothing big or important happens and you can tell steve lyons didn’t care for writing compassion at all. skip it

The Banquo Legacy by Andy Lane and Justin Richards: Big Plot Developments in this one - mostly in the beginning and end. also the only (?) mention of irving braxiatel in the whole run! it’s written from the POV of two Normal people not on the tardis so it’s interesting to see how they perceive the doctor and fitz, and how this contradicts the way they define themselves in other books where we’re privy to their internal monologue 

The Ancestor Cell by Peter Anghelides and Stephen Cole: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHH AAAAGHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU HFHOA8U8OIA AOUIY4P98 YT39 7UGHYIB3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this one drives me insane and there are parts of it i reread nearly every day. because i’m CRAZY. it’s a controversial novel in the doctor who fandom because of how it handles gallifrey and faction paradox lore but WHO FUCKING CARES? FATHER KREINER IS BACK BABY

The Burning by Justin Richards: this is the start of the Earth Arc, so it’s the first portrayal of the doctor stuck on earth without any of his memories. it’s a bit slow at the beginning, and as a normal doctor who story i would consider it subpar, but the characterization of the doctor really carries it i think. you see how losing his memory impacted his restraint with things such as hypnosis and Other Stuff I Shan’t Spoil

Casualties of War by Steve Emmerson: this has the first appearance of the Note, so it’s especially important for that reason. but it’s also just a neat story that has way more elements of a fantasy than a sci fi and again, seeing how the doctor acts now, stuck on earth without his memories, and juxtaposing that with how he acted before, super fun and neat

The Turing Test by Paul Leonard: if i could graft this book onto my DNA i would. i already KNEW the circumstances surrounding alan turing’s death and yet i still cried about it while reading this!! paul leonard’s portrayal of turing as both a gay and autistic man (though the latter is never explicitly stated) is INCREDIBLE and i really can’t recommend it enough just based on that. but the story itself is amazing and really delves into the doctor’s Differences and his desperation to leave earth after being stuck there for decades. 

Endgame by Terrance Dicks: people really like this one and i guess i had fun with it but i just can’t really get into terrence dicks’ writing style. that being said it features the doctor listless and just so sad and depressed so you kind of have to read it. if that’s not reason enough there’s a fat gay alcoholic spy who absolutely rocks

Father Time by Lance Parkin: i hate that this is green. i hate it. i hate this fucking book. i hate lance parkin also. but this is where miranda (the doctor’s adopted daughter) is introduced so alas, you must read it and imagine a version of this book thats infinitely better in your head. sorry! 

Escape Velocity by Colin Brake: this one’s mid but it’s the end of the earth arc and fitz and the doctor reunite and ANJI KAPOOR IS HERE!!!!!!!! FINALLY!!!!!!! so if you read this and get a lil bored just know it’s about to get so fucking good you guys

EarthWorld by Jacqueline Rayner: genuinely can’t say enough good things about this one. it’s funny. it’s angsty. it’s all in all just a really fun book. and it’s the shortest one i think so like you have no excuse to not read it

Fear Itself by Nick Wallace: this is technically a PDA because it was written after nine was announced, thereby making 8 technically a “past doctor”, but who give a shit. read this one are yoyu kidding me. read it read it read it read it READ IT. there’s a twist in it that rendered me absolutely catatonic for about a week 

Vanishing Point by Stephen Cole: don’t skip this one even though it’s orange. are you listening to me? don’t fucking skip it ok!!! steve cole is the #1 fitz/eight shipper and this really shines through here. also maybe i’m just easily entertained by reasonably accurate science in my doctor who books but i liked all the genetics references

Eater of Wasps by Trevor Baxendale: trevor you sly dog you did it again. you mad bastard. not only is the storyline in this one soo gripping and also Quite horrifying but the characterization?? hoooooo boy. this is the book where “you really love him, don’t you?” “well, i like to think we’re just good friends.” comes from and so even if it was dogshit you’d have to read it just for that like cmon

The Year of Intelligent Tigers by Kate Orman: holy. fucking. shit. good grief. the doctor has a boyfriend and they go on picnics and drink chocolate martinis together. the doctor becomes a catboy for a few months. this story takes place on a colony world whose culture is predominantly centered around music, so you have the doctor playing his violin (hot). you have scientifically accurate zoology/xenobiology. you have a Mysterious lost civilization. most importantly you have fitz’s song he wrote for the doctor

The Slow Empire by Dave Stone: this one’s just FUNNY okay. dave stone has such a characteristic way of writing prose it’s just kind of a joy to read. if you get the hard copy all of the bits from a side character’s pov is written in comic sans. while some of the characterization is a bit meh and anji didn’t Really live up to her full potential in a couple scenes i’d still recommend it. there’s footnotes

Dark Progeny by Steve Emmerson: this is another one i colored orange even though i whole-heartedly recommend it.. it’s a commentary on corporate apathy and greed and how it destroys entire planets and just a really engaging story besides. not to mention we get a “fitz fitz fitz fitz fitz!” bit from 8 <3

The City of the Dead by Lloyd Rose: i can’t even talk about this oine lest i lose my mind… not joking when i say lloyd rose writes some of the best and juiciest angst in the whole series like some of the scenes in there made me feel like i was being helplessly entrapped in flowing grain for a month

Grimm Reality by Simon Bucher-Jones and Kelly Hale: i really do sound like a broken record at this point but this is another one of those books i could never say enough positive things about. there are two novels in this series that genre-hop and this is one of them. the tardis lands on a world where everything runs on logic straight out of the brother’s grimm (hence the title). there’s magic cloaks and evil stepsisters and giants, and the doctor, fitz, and anji all have their own separate adventures so it’s super interesting to see how each character deals with being in a fairytale. not only that but there are parts of the book written in the style of those old fairytales and i really do get a good kick out of  gimmicky stuff like that 

The Adventuress of Henrietta Street by Lawrence Miles: buckle the fuck up everyone and get out your highlighters and sticky notes because this one is so fucking dense you’ll have no choice but to annotate and take notes, sorry! it’s written in the style of a historical nonfiction which occasionally falls flat (where’s the fucking works cited, lawrence???), but the story is fucking crazy. you got arcane rituals, prostitutes doing sex magic that summon great apes, sabbath is here, the doctor is weak and sickly (always awesome), sabbath is here, the doctor gets married so he can save the earth, sabbath is here,

Mad Dogs and Englishmen by Paul Leonard: this is the petplay book featuring multicolored poodles that have human hands. need i say more? 

Hope by Mark Clapham: not the best book but it’s got some pretty crucial anji moments in, and we all love love love anji so much so we’ll read mediocre novels just for her!! (but we also see the doctor struggle with only having one heart so that’s fun too)

Anachrophobia by Jonathan Morris: literally my top 3 book in the series EASY. it takes place on a planet ravaged by a time war (as in a war that fights with weapons that fuck with time. not like That time war), yet despite that particular futuristic conceit the entire atmosphere of the book feels like something out of the 40s or 50s  - almost like the aesthetics of fallout, but instead of nuclear radiation it’s Time. most of the story takes place in this sealed off bunker that’s doing experiments to try and develop time travel, and while they’re successful in going back in time the guinea pigs who volunteered for the trial develop an illness that fucks up their personal timelines so bad they literally turn into clock zombies. and it’s contagious. but no one can leave because theres fucked up time outside uh oh!!! if you liked the themes of war profiteering from boom in the new season you’ll LOVE this book

Trading Futures by Lance Parkin: fuck you lance parkin i can’t stand your ass! you can’t fucking write for shit!!! i’d recommend this book if you want to see anji referred to as ‘the asian woman’ more than her actual name :) and a southeast asian character with a name that might as well have been taken right out of a book written by  jk rowling. really the only good part of this book is when anji almost calls the doctor an otter-fucker

The Book of the Still by Paul Ebbs: this book is a WILD fucking ride. this book is fucking insane in the most positive of ways. paul ebbs writes an absolutely top tier eight that manages to encapsulate all the development he went through in the series as well as evoking the characterization from the 1996 movie

The Crooked World by Steve Lyons: this is the second book that does a genre-swap, but instead of fairytales this time the tardis lands on a planet dominated by saturday morning cartoon physics and logic. but the doctor & co being there begins to introduce Real Life concepts such as death and sex and swearing, so all these wacky cartoon characters who’ve spent their whole lives doing wacky cartoon things like blowing each other up with sticks of dynamite or hitting each other with big hammers suddenly find that these actions actually have very very serious consequences, which really kicks off when this story’s equivalent of tom rips off this story’s equivalent of jerry’s head, killing him instantly. idk i just watched a lot of saturday morning cartoons as a kid so seeing the parodies of wacky races and scooby doo was very enjoyable. to me

History 101 by Mags L Halliday: to put it simply this book is about leftist infighting. to put it more complexly this book is about the spanish civil war and how differing opinions and principles can alter one’s perception of history - and what happens when history actually starts being changed in accordance to these differing principles. there’s also the subplot featuring fitz’s homoerotic, yet very traumatizing, travels with a guy named sasha as they journey to guernica so they can watch it be bombed

Camera Obscura by Lloyd Rose: this is where sabbath and the doctor’s relationship really reaches it’s peak. this is The Esteemed Toxic Old Man Yaoi Novel. but also remember when i said lloyd rose writes the best angst? this holds especially true here. i won’t spoil it for you but Something Crazy Happens to the Doctor! haha. haha

Time Zero by Justine Richards: this is just quantum physics: the novel. while fitz goes on his doomed siberia expedition with the geologist boytoy george in the 19th century, the doctor investigates some strange readings in siberia like a hundred years later, and some crazy confusing hijinks ensue! the events in this book kick off the arc that’ll continue for the next few books until sometime never where the multiverse is collapsing and the doctor has to fix it. even though he doesn’t know how. ALSO TRIX INTRODUCTIONNNNNN!!!!!!!!

The Infinity Race by Simon Messingham: this one’s whatever. the sabbath characterization is wack but there are a few good moments. you think it’s going to be mostly about a cool boat race but sadly that comes secondary -_-

The Domino Effect by David Bishop: this book is ASS, both plot-wise and characterization-wise. it also just seems like the author was trying to be needlessly edgy when he developed the setting, and there are just some baffling moments where characters say and do things i frankly think they would never say 

Reckless Engineering by Nick Walters: the events in this one center around a tragedy that is fucking batshit insane. the universe this takes place in features a post-apocalyptic earth. i shan’t say what this apocalypse was because finding out what happened is all apart of the fun guys. i can’t spoil everything for you

The Last Resort by Paul Leonard: what if a corporation discovered TIME TRAVEL and set up RESORTS all across human history? what if there was a mcdonalds in ancient egypt and advertisements for microsoft in the original version of the bible? also what if something just soooo fucked up happens so many times <3

Timeless by Stephen Cole: anji’s last book. sobs.

Emotional Chemistry by Simon A. Forward: idk what it was but i just didn’t really vibe with this one. it’s not awful by any means and there’s a bit of plot carried in from the last novel that continues into the next but the actions that surround it don’t really matter i think. honestly i’d just read a summary of this one and continue on 

Sometime Never... by Justin Richards: the culmination of the multiverse stuff. i liked it - miranda makes a reappearance, and the fact she’s written by someone other than lance parkin is already a plus. my only qualm is i don’t really like how it handled sabbath but that’s sort of how i felt about all the books post camera obscura… sigh

Halflife by Mark Michalowski: ANOTHER EASY TOP 3. i’m simply obsessed with all of the concepts and tropes in this book, not to mention it’s where fitz’s infamous Ass Dream can be found. there’s commentary on racism, colonialism, and religion, and it also features cannibalism as a metaphor for love :D

The Tomorrow Windows by Jonathan Morris: another case of me coloring a book orange even though i think you should read it anyway. it’s positively saturated with so many interesting alien planets and creatures and societies you’d be missing out if you didn’t read this one tbh. it’s also the first novel ever to feature the ninth doctor!

The Sleep of Reason by Martin Day: this one ok. it’s another book written from the pov of an outsider and her insights into the doctor, fitz, and trix are interesting (and their characterization when they show up is outstanding!) but it feels like they’re rarely in it & this close to the end of the series i just want to see more of my guys you know...

The Deadstone Memorial by Trevor Baxendale: i loved the atmosphere in this one. it’s more of a ghost story with sci fi elements, and the stakes involved aren’t Bigger Than Ever like they tend to be nowadays, but instead surround the wellbeing of a family of a single mom and her two kids which i appreciate - the doctor isn’t saving the Whole Universe and World; just a family from a small town; it’s effective in getting the point across that the doctor thinks everyone’s important and worth saving 

To the Slaughter by Stephen Cole: this one’s fun and goofy and steve cole wrote it solely so he could fix an error from a fourth doctor serial in which the doctor got the number of jupiter’s moons wrong. that being said the reason it’s not colored orange is because the last book of the series is written by lance parkin and i want to help you procrastinate reading his godawful prose for as long as possible. your welcome

The Gallifrey Chronicles by Lance Parkin: fuck you lance parkin

[greenarrow-core]

Sanctuary, One of the Best Green Arrow stories ever

Sanctuary(Detective Comics #551-552)

Just coming of a disappointment that Billie Jean wouldn't show up again, a banger story came. And it just gets better as you go on.

So Dinah and Ollie were hanging out in a diner. Then:

Ollie doesn't give a shit, punches the fucking cop.

I'll mention something here, that will turn out to be irrelevant later on. Ollie only stood up to protect the legal immigrant here. Just because it's something that would get slightly in people's heads, the idea of the hero limiting themselves to the law, but this is Green Arrow, wait for it.

The illegal ones were arrested. The kid that Ollie protected, Guillermo, tells him how although he's legal, his brother is illegal.

Ollie then goes out to visit Guillermo's brother, Francisco who's hiding in a church with other illegal immigrants, to help him somehow.

The INS barges in the church and arrests everyone, the immigrants, Ollie and the priest. All of them are taken to the detention center.

The warden(I guess) says a bunch of nonsense and Ollie shows his disdain for the law.

Dinah shows up in the detention center as Ollie's lawyer. (Is this just a cover or does she really have a degree?)

She brings some stuff so Ollie can break out of the prison.

He breaks out with Francisco and his family.

Love Ollie calling it underground railroad

And then...

Yeah, Let's fucking free everyone.

Continuing talking about the underground railroad.

And he does all that very charmingly and chaotic. A silly goose.

So, let's review what he did, he punched the INS cop standing up for an immigrant and standing up against racism.

Broke out every immigrant held in an INS prison. He also just left free and didn't get any formal release. He just broke out.

And if you haven't grasped, this isn't even a "these INS are corrupt INS guys". They are just the INS. There's no corruption or anything. This is one of Ollie's biggest middle fingers to the law.

For other story involving Ollie standing up for illegal immigrants, check World's Finest #275, the full story is 274-*278.

[dykemagik]

"you can't help it. you are your father's daughter." batman: urban legends (2021-2023) #3, #10, #16 | birds of prey (2023-) #6 | batgirl (2024-) #1, #2

[mothmanavenue]

he’s got my heartbeat skipping down 16th avenue

[lancehenriksen]

Lance seems to have gotten new ink for his 84th birthday

[badsongpetey]

Come spooky season I reread “It’s You That’s Haunting Me” by @jacqulinetan on AO3. It’s like a fun a Buzzfeed Unsolved au with Keith as the believer who’s excited to be in whatever haunted deathtrap he can find, and Lance as the skeptic who’d rather burn it all with fire thankyouverymuch. The third story in the series genuinely freaks me out every time.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

not sure if you've done this one before but how would the vanilla + SVE bachelors react to the farmer giving them a shirt (or any top article of clothing) with one of those boob windows? What if the farmer pleads them with puppy eyes in hopes of convincing them to put it on?

🌚

No, I definitely didn’t write a headcanon about this topic. And today we will fix it~ (thanks for the ask, dear anon!🫰💕)

_________________________________________

SDV/SVE bachelors react to their Farmer spouse who gives them clothes with a "boob window":

Alex thought at first that that line on the T-shirt was a damage, but when Farmer explained to the athlete that this was the way it should be, he hesitated for a couple of seconds, and put the T-shirt on. Though Alex blushed a little at Farmer's stare, he realised that he looked pretty good in it and started to look at himself in the mirror. "Hey honey, you know what's better than this 'titty' t-shirt? No t-shirt!". He took off his t-shirt and with a smug smile began to flex in front of his spouse. Farmer should give him credit: it's impossible to disagree with such a valid argument.

"Nice try, dear, but still no." Sebastian sat on the couch with his laptop while his dearest spouse ran around him and begged him to at least try on a t-shirt with an oval cut on the chest. Neither the sad eyes nor the bribe-laden entreaties worked on the emo, who seemed to be amused by Farmer's futile attempts to convince him. "Yeah we'd sooner have an obsidian portal on our farm than I'd wear this." Bad mistake. Because a few hours later there was a huge obsidian archway on the farm (the portal is working, btw) and the Farmer was standing nearby, triumphantly handing a flushed Sebby a t-shirt.

"Honey, don't you think that's a bit much?" Elliott is a fan of unbuttoning his collar and being in dramatic poses when he's writing another masterpiece or posing for a drawing. But here, he'll probably draw the line. No, not to say he hates it at all, this sweater with the... hmm, rather unusual cut, but Elliott's used to his style of dress, and this doesn't fit his image in any way. Even Farmer's tearful pleas won't make him change his mind (though Elliott must admit, he almost gives in, because Farmer knows how to make professional puppy-dog eyes).

"Ah, fuck it. Give it to me." Shane, as it turned out, wasn't hard to convince. His only stipulation, though, was that he would only wear that "boob window" shirt ("Heh, what a fucking name...") at home on the farm. Because even if the chicken man himself doesn't give a shit about most people's opinions and dresses as he pleases, he still doesn't want Jas and Marnie to catch him wearing that t-shirt. It would be... awkward, to say at least. This cloth is comfortable tho, plus his size. "Heh, boob window. Enjoying the view?" Farmer is definitely enjoing the view.

Huh... Sam had tried all sorts of extravagant clothes in an effort to find his unique style in the past, but this was new even to him. He certainly wore that t-shirt with the cutout on the chest, purely out of curiosity. It's cool, but... not his style. The young guitarist had thought about unusual clothes for his music band, but a side boob shirt cut was more his style than this. Sorry Farmer- hey, c'mon, don't give him this sad look! They know it's hard for Sam to say no to them with those sad eyes... Ok, but he won't wear this to a family dinner, deal?

If the Farmer wanted Harvey to stand flushed for a minute, congratulations - they've achieved their goal! With all due respect to his spouse, the local doctor is not too keen on wearing a sweater with such a cut. But interestingly enough, he has asked them not to put these clothes far away, as the resourceful doctor has found a use for it. If Farmer insists on staying late in the Mines, Harvey just needs to drop his selfies of himself (still flushed) wearing this sweater. Farmer teleports home at lightning speed and almost kicks in the front door. Works every time!

"Please!" "No." "Please!" "No." Farmer had been following Magnus around like a duckling following its mother for about fifteen minutes now, hoping to change their stubborn husband's mind and at least try on that sweater with the big line on the chest. Attempts, so far, had been unsuccessful. "Please!" "No." Magnus is quite happy with his magical uniform, which gives him charm and mystery vibe. Especially since he doesn't want any of his colleagues to catch him with that sweater. So wizard has to say no to his beloved spouse. Although they are stubborn. "Please!" "No."

"My dear, is this your way of trying to hint to me that I should unbutton my shirt more often?" Lance smiled slyly at Farmer, and the blush on their cheeks made it immediately clear to the gallant adventurer that he had hit right on target. That clothes with a cut-out on the chest, if the truth be told, is not to his taste. Especially since Lance doesn't see the point of it at all, if he and his spouse can find alternatives. All Lance has to do is simply undo the gilded buttons of his snow-white shirt, spread the collar a little for... *chuckle* a better view for a Farmer, and that's it. The effect will be the same.

Victor had a heap of doubts, but it was hard to resist Farmer's puppy-dog eyes, so, to Farmer's glee, he put on the T-shirt they handed him with.... "Boob window"? Is that what it's called? What a name..." The size is certainly his, and the fabric is of good quality, but... He feels a little bit uncomfortable. And Yoba forbid his mother catches him like this, otherwise it would take a long time to explain everything. Victor could have just unbuttoned his shirt. Or... or no shirt at all, if Farmer wanted to hint to him that they'd like to have fun tonight...

[alluraaaa]

lance being a jack of all trades had such good potential. a guy who’s decently good at everything but not amazing at anything who only sees the lack of perfection. he’s always someone’s second choice because there’s always someone better, and he acts out and builds a persona of false bravado to cope with that. that’s why he’s so proud of being the “cool ninja sharpshooter,” because it’s the first thing he’s been the best at that’s useful in a war

there could have been an amazing character arc about how being good at things or being the best at something isn’t indicative of someone’s worth. the team doesn’t love him because he’s a great shot and a good paladin. they love him because he’s lance

and idk if i’m swinging at a hornet’s nest here (defo would’ve been in 2017) but that’s why i don’t like black paladin lance lmao. lance isn’t the best choice for black paladin, and that’s okay. leading and strategizing are things he’s good at, like so many others, but it isn’t his forte. with his wide skillset and smooth adaptability, he’s the perfect fit for the role of support as the guardian of water. water is liquid! it fills in the gaps!! while everyone else has a dedicated Thing, he picks up the slack to make the team stronger!!!!!

and if we’re looking at this through a klance lens, there’s a lot to say about lance’s fabricated rivalry. keith was (at least in lance’s eyes) absolutely perfect. a perfect student, a perfect pilot, able to effortlessly do things that it took endless practice for lance to get decent at. of course lance starts to hate him, who wouldn’t in that position. not to mention the months spent being constantly compared to keith. to have keith— that keith— fall in love with lance would be so narratively delicious. to have someone so seemingly perfect look up to you? to have someone so seemingly perfect show he isn’t by being vulnerable and open and trusting you to not to be cruel? chefs kiss MUAH

ummm tldr blue paladin lance forever and ever and also the full quote is “a jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one.”

[linipik]

It is Valentine's Day and seeing all the lovey-dovey couples and everyone who is interested in any sort of dating is already with someone has Lance feeling down.

--

💌Let's play~