#lady jane rayne

[littlemuoi]

The Queen's maids of honour at her Coronation remember the day that changed their lives by Emily Nash (interview) & Ian Jones (photos) Published in Hello! Magazine's Issue 1427 - 25th April 2016

[holdmytesseract]

Loki request: Reader with KP (Keratosis Pilaris). She is a little insecure about her KP. She finally decides to tell Loki and show him. Of course, the KP doesn't bother him. In fact, he loves it. He tells her that she shouldn't worry about something that bothers silly Midgardians. He will kiss every bump on her body. He sometimes needs to feel her bumpy arms after a bad day.

Just The Way You Are

Loki Laufeyson x fem!Reader

Summary: You shut yourself off from Loki; not showing him an inch of your skin. Being the doubtful God he is, he immediately is afraid that he was doing something wrong. What happens when he accidentally uncovers your secret?

Warnings: angst, insecurities/insecure reader, fluff, talks of sex? nudity? even more fluff, Loki being the best boyfriend

Word Count: 2k

a/n: I hope you like this, friend! :) This is the last story of this year! It's been one hell of a ride - that much is clear! Huge thanks to everyone who became part of the crew and read my stories. And of course to all my wonderful friends and mutuals! I love you all! *biiiig hugs*

Tags: @lady-rose-moon @huntress-artemis @muddyorbsblr @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @chennqingg @smolvenger @alexakeyloveloki @theaudacitytowrite @jennyggggrrr @stupidthoughtsinwriting @asgards-princess-of-mischief @eleniblue @vanilla-daydreaming @loz-3 @valencia-rou @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @fictive-sl0th @bunny24sstuff @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @lovingchoices14 @linaax @mochie85 @goblingirlsarah @glitchquake @lokidbadguy @icytrickster17 @gruftiela @lulubelle814 @mandywholock1980 @november-rayne @chantsdemarins @simping-for-marvel @lou12346789 @aagn360 @lokiforever @anukulee @multifandom-worlds

Masterlist °☆• Loki Masterlist

The library was empty at that time of the day. It was quiet.

Almost too quiet.

The only sound was the ticking sound of the clock, hanging at the wall. A sound Loki didn't even discerned. He was way too lost in his thoughts - something Thor noticed, too, when he entered the library. All the god of Thunder wanted was to put back a few books Jane had read and now he found his brother staring absent-mindedly at the white wall across from him. Loki wasn't even blinking.

Thor frowned; cocked his head. "Have you magicked the lines of that book on the wall or why are you so focused on white nothingness, brother?" The blonde man's booming voice ripped Loki rather harshly out of his thoughts. He almost jumped out of his skin.

"Oh fy faen, brother!" Loki cursed; jaw clenching. Thor giggled apologetically. "Apologies, brother. I didn't mean to scare you..." He paused for a moment; watched how Loki crossed his arms over his chest; grumbling. "Why were you staring at the wall? Are you quite alright?" The younger god's fingers twitched around the book; body visibly tensing. "Sure." He just said; shaking his head.

Thor was probably not always the smartest, but by now - after all those years, he could tell when something was bothering Loki. Not always, but today was it quite obvious. The blonde shook his head. "You are not. I can tell. Don't fool me, brother. What's bothering you?" Loki snorted. "Nothing of your interest, brother. My problem, not yours." Thor frowned and then shook his head, before he plopped down next to Loki on the way too small sofa for the bulky man's physique, almost crushing his younger sibling.

"Brother, what-" Loki complained, but got cut off by Thor slapping his big palm against his chest; causing all the air to leave his lungs. "Talk to me. I know something is wrong. I want to help you, Loki." The raven haired man coughed; needing to take a big breath. "And..." Another deep breath. "And what exactly makes you think that you can help me?" Thor just shrugged his shoulders; giving him a smile. "Intention. Besides, we are brothers."

Loki crossed his arms over his chest once more. "And what if I simply don't wish to talk to you?" "You don't have to, but I'm sure it would help. Of course you can just keep on bottling all up until it- How does that Midgardian saying go?" Thor frowned; thinking hard. "Ah! Until it eats you up inside!" He shrugged his shoulders again, "Do whatever pleases you." and wanted to stand up, when Loki held him back. "Alright, alright, fine," he grumbled; giving in.

Thor smiled and sat back down beside him. "Spill it. I'm all ears, brother."

Loki sighed; felt the embarrassment creeping a bit up on him. "It's about Y/N... She... She won't let me... see her." Thor frowned; was visibly not catching up, "What do you mean by that?" and causing Loki to roll his eyes. "Oh for faen," he mumbled underneath his breath. "Sex, brother! It's about sex!"

Thor blinked for a few moment, until a shit-eating grin formed on his face. "Does my little brother has problems with satisfying his lady?" He gave him a nudge with his shoulder; wiggling his eyebrows. "Don't fret, brother. I'm the perfect man to give you advice in how to-" Loki pinched the bridge of his nose; already regretting that he agreed to talk to Thor. "It's not that!" He cut his brother off and sighed.

"No?" Thor asked; smile dropping. "What, uh, is it then?" Another sigh left the raven haired god's lips. "Where do I start..." Loki said; more to himself than Thor. "We are together now for almost six months and... I... I'm afraid that I'm doing something wrong..." The blonde's gaze softened; realising that this was a serious, important matter. "Why is that?" Loki started to pick nervously at his nails. "Well, because she... She seems to 'hide' herself from me. She avoids me, seeing her barely dressed or naked. She locks the door when she's showering or changing... I-I mean, I understand that. I really do. If she feels uncomfortable with that yet, then I won't push her, but whenever I try to speak with her about this, she escapes the conversation..." Loki swallows. "And now I'm afraid that I am the reason... You know me, brother... The voices in my head are getting louder and louder. Am I doing something wrong? Did I push her too much and didn't notice it? Is she not trusting me enough? If yes, why?" Loki hung his head; raven curls falling into his face. "I give her all the time she needs. I'd wait forever for her, but... It's bothering me. I-I want to understand it and help her - but I can't, because she won't talk to me... What do I do, brother?"

"Hmm..." Thor hums; scratching his beardy chin. "What if you talk to her properly?" Loki blinked. "Properly?" Thor nodded. "Just... confront her directly. Tell Lady Y/N that this is bothering you and that you wish to understand." "But what if she tries to avoid me again?"

The god of thunder smiled and clapped his hand on Loki's shoulder. "You've got a silver-tongue, brother... Talking is your strength. You just have to wait for the right moment." Loki looked a bit uncertain at the blonde man. "If you say so..." "I know so." The raven haired man gave his brother a small smile. "Thank you."

And Loki waited for the right moment. It took quite a few days for the right moment to arrive, but in the end, it did...

Loki came to you earlier that evening. Steve's eight o'clock meeting didn't take as long as usual and therefore, Loki was too early. Something you didn't know and not anticipated to happen. You were sure that you had enough time to take a shower and get dressed until your boyfriend came back - but you didn't... "Darling?" The god called out for you. It was dark in your apartment. Since you were a couple, Loki spent more time in your home than his. He frowned; looking down the dark hallway - and noticed that the light in your bathroom was on. Only seconds later, he heard the running water of the shower. Loki swallowed hard; knew exactly that you were unaware of his presence. He considered for a millisecond to try and see if the door was open - but no. No, he wouldn't do that. He respected your privacy and whatever you were insecure about.

Taking off his shoes and suit jacket, he decided to wait in the bedroom for you. A green shimmer enveloped his body as he walked inside the cosy room; changing him from his 'business clothes' into casual clothes. Sweatpants and t-shirt. He grabbed the book resting on your nightstand and flopped on the bed; reading.

Meanwhile you still hadn't a single clue that Loki was already back and currently chilling on your bed. Therefore, you finished showering carelessly and made your way to the bedroom after blow drying your hair - only wearing underwear, in order to get dressed.

Humming the song which ghosted through your brain already the whole day, you opened the door and walked in. You were so rapt in the song, you didn't even notice that your bedside lamp was on - or your boyfriend laying on the bed. Loki blinked; was quite shocked about your 'careless behaviour'. His eyes widened as they travelled over your almost nude body; seeing the holy temple he always wanted to worship but never could suddenly in front of him.

"D-Darling?" He more or less stuttered out with a husky voice.

Hearing the sound of his voice; you flinched badly and literally were completely taken by surprise. Like a deer, caught in the headlights you stared at Loki; eyes at the size of plates. But once your mind had caught up, all warnings bells inside your brain were ringing. Get out of here! Get out of here! Your mind was screaming at you. Escape the situation! Flee!

Acting on your instinct, you did just that. You ran. Out of the bedroom, inside the bathroom; door flying shut behind you. Loki immediately realised what was going on and jumped to his feet; storming after you - but he was too slow. Just when he reached the door, the lock clicked shut.

"Darling?!" Loki was afraid; worried that he scared you off even more now. I should've told her I am here, he cursed himself internally. "Y/N? L-Love, please... I'm sorry." A few seconds later, he heard a small sob from the other side; followed by a uncertain, wobbly voice. "A-Are... Are you going to leave me now?"

Loki frowned; was more than just confused - if that was even possible...

"Why... Why in all the nine realms should I leave you, love?" You sobbed - and it almost broke the god's heart. "B-Because you saw me half naked... You probably even saw it..."

Loki blinked. That was it. He couldn't take this anymore. "Okay, darling, please open the door. We need to talk. This is long overdue."

You already feared the worst, as you anxiously unlocked the door and opened it slowly, hesitatingly; letting Loki in. He stepped inside - and was face to face with your almost naked self for the second time in his life. While you fought the urge to cover yourself, Loki literally bathed in the vision of your beautiful body.

"You are stunning, my love. Absolutely beautiful. A goddess."

You blinked. "I-I... What? Loki, are you... Are you kidding me?" Those words almost hurt him. "Why should I, love?" Your jaw dropped. You couldn't believe this. "Don't... Don't you see it?" You gestured at your legs, shoulders and belly. "Are you blind?" A single tear was running down your cheeks - and Loki fought the urge to wipe it away. "You mean the red, bumpy dots-" "On my skin, yes." You interrupted him. Loki swallowed; was very uncertain about how to react in that situation right now. You seemed hurt, but also sad, insecure and angry.

"What are they? Is it a-a illness?" You nodded; defeated. "Keratosis Pilaris. A skin condition, which leaves not very pretty small, rough, reddish or white bumps and patches on the skin." Loki stayed silent for a moment; processing your words. "Is it... harmless?" "Yes." A relieved breath left his lips. "Oh thank the Norns. You really had me worried there for a second, darling." You blinked; were on the brink of being speechless. "You... You are not... d-disgusted?" Horror overtook your boyfriend's face. "Disgusted?!" He shook his head. "No, no, my darling Y/N. Absolutely not. You are the most beautiful woman those eyes have ever seen. I don't care about the bumps and patches. It's a part of you - and I love every part of you."

"Y-You do?"

"Yes. With all my heart."

The butterflies within you belly were running wild at his sweet, heart melting words. It became a lot to handle suddenly; your emotions, insecurities and fears overwhelming you. Words failed you. All you could do was cry. Loki was instantly by your side; literally catching you, wrapping you up in a snug, warm hug. His lips pressed against your forehead. "Shh, my beautiful angel. I love you."

You snuggled even closer against him and just cried; getting all out of your system.

When you had calmed down a bit, Loki carried you back into the bedroom and laid down on the bed with you; pulling you against his body. "Was that the reason why you always avoided to get undressed in front of me?" You nodded; another tear rolling down your cheek. "Y-Yes. I-I'm pretty insecure about my KP a-and well... All the guys I dated before you were, uh, they... They didn't like it." Loki was shocked. Appalled at what you just told him. "All those Midgardian men never fail to disgust me... How dare they." He spat; shaking his head. "They clearly don't know how to treat a woman properly." The god smiled lovingly at you and started to pepper your skin with kisses; paying extra attention to the little bumps on your body.

"Never ever hide yourself from me, my love. I love you just the way you are, okay?" You nodded; giving him a small smile. "Okay."

[namenerdery]

Girls with interesting names born in Ohio between 2016-2020 [A]

Aadisyn Brandy Marie Aailayah Elizabeth Rayne Aalaexah Lanae Aaliyalexa Willa Marie Aasezlee Raiyne Madison-Grace Aayezzlyn Tymberllie Jeene Abaddon Bell Abberlynne Mary Absidiey Michelle-Rosalii Ada'Millia Taylor Elizabeth Adaylynn Elizabeth Addiesten Taylor Addyisyn Nicole Adorable Sunshine Aegwynn Nova Aeon Nyx Aeritraya Sky Aeriylle Aurora-Michele Aerow Layke-Rhaine Aesleigh Marie Aethelind Miriam Affinity Amoura Agelyn Griselda A'Glorielle Novae Ahlynniah Anns-Leigh Ahmaezing Lee Lady Ahsoka Rey Ahtominie Leanne Alantis Dahlia Aleighciana Jade Alexicia Rai Alizzianna Jane Alleavia Mae Allegheny Freedom Lynn Allilliannah Laraee Althentica Yvette A'Magine Heaven Amandolin Rae Amayzine Pamela Amirayhana Rose Amithyst Moon A'Nautica Unique Cherie Andalusia Alice Anthym Rae Aonyst Lynne-Marie A'Peace Divinity Appolanna Phenix Archlynn Mae Argenta Nocturne Arianavella Marie Arrisynn Eileen Arriylahh Josephaya Starr Artemis Echero Sylvanas Zyra Illizabela Velma Louise Mirijane Artist Elaine Ashantiara Mariella Ashtalyn Joanne Aszaelay Italia Atlyss Michelle-Rose Auctavia Marie Auhbree Lynn Aumyla'Samone Cowgirl Aurora Day Maleficent Aurorabelle Victorious Auvrianah Lauren La'Shae Avallionna Grace Louise Avolene Elizabeth Awtumn May Axl-Lynn Rose Azalyme Ryyan A'Zzora Mary Ann-Lynn

[jackjeckel007]

that's all good and all but who I really only like is cats bats penguins polar bears wolves BATMAN Joker the Misfits SamhaiN DANZIG SePuLTurA SLAYER Merciful Fate King Diamond GWAR RAWG Halloween the Nightmare Before Christmas ICP ( Insane Clown Posse ) JUMPSTEADY ESHAM the GOLDEN GOLDIES Project Born Mike E Clark House of KrAzEES TwizTiD KIDCRUSHER the doors Jimi Hendrix Dead Kennedys dIschArge BLACK METAL !! ( not Cradle of Filth ) Mary Jane the peanutbutter candy any candy Snickers Reese's Gummy Worms chalk candy I don't give a fu×<k bring it FAYGO POP oh and my skateboard , I can't forget to mention that I like my skateboard too Fairuza Balk Jennifer Tilly Jennifer Aniston lisa Kudrow Alyssa Milano Shannon Elizabeth RaYnE from BlooDRaYnE that sexi gothic girl Dani Divine Sierra Skye Daphne Velma Halle Berry in the Flintstones movie teachers nurses nuns Catwoman Harley Quinn Mary Jane Lady Death Danielle Colby and sometimes even Pamela Anderson I despise Baseball and don't give a fu×k about it that goes for basketball too I'm a JUGGALO the sport I really like is the sports with bloodloss classic CHEVROLET lowriders RAPID - FIRE the Crow Dropdead FRED COMMANDO TwiSTeD METAL Interstate 76 SPYRO the Dragon Crash Bandicoot DOOM MARY HUANA .

[theroyalhistory]

Lady Jane Antonia Frances Vane-Tempest-Stewart (later Lady Rayne), one of Queen Elizabeth II’s Maids of Honour at her coronation, 1953

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Sunday, April 10

XANDER: So you're saying ... Ben and Glory... ANYA: Have a connection. GILES: Yes, obviously, but what kind? SPIKE: Oh, I get it. That's very crafty. Glory's worked the kind of mojo where anyone who sees her little presto-change-o instantly forgets. And yours truly, being somewhat other than human ... stands immune. WILLOW: So ... Ben and Glory ... are-are the same person? XANDER: Glory can turn into Ben, and Ben turns back into Glory. ANYA: And anyone who sees it instantly forgets. SPIKE: Kewpie doll for the lady. GILES: Excellent. Now. Do we suspect there may be some kind of connection between Ben and Glory?

~~Weight of the World~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Of the Wiccas (Willow/Tara, M) by R4ik3n

Bathysphere (Angelus/Buffy, M) by Anonymous

You Must Be Above This (I Fear I Shall Sink) (Angelus/Buffy, M) by Anonymous

Walk the Line (Buffy/Spike, G) by violettathepiratequeen

You're No Fun, You're No Fun (Buffy, T) by heterocosmica

School Dance (Xander, K+) by forsaken2003

Of the Slayer and the Vampire (Buffy/Spike, T) by Aragorn II Elessar

Frenemy (Buffy/Spike, PG) by Holly

[Chaptered Fiction]

Living Things, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, T) by EllieRose101

Tea with Two Sugars a Drop of Milk and a Chaos Witch Fiancee (Season 1), Chapter 1 (Giles/Ethan Rayne, T) by saracenruedoesntknowthings

The Vampire's Daughter, Chapter 9 (Spike, T) by Puella Pulchra

Mortal Allies Series, Episode 5: War and Roses, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Passion4Spike

Sign of the Times, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by JaneRemmington

Dribbles, Chapter 12 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by bewildered

The Bond, Chapter 9 (Buffy/Spike, AO) by Grief Counseling

Snippets, Chapter 20 (Buffy/Spike, R) by EllieRose101

Web, Chapter 13 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by DarkVoid116

Bleeding Poetry, Chapter 10 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Dusty

Apres, Chapter 10 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Ninereeds

Whiplash, Chapter 2 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Ninereeds

Epistolary, Chapter 1 (Buffy/Spike, PG-13) by Touchstoneaf

Possessed, Chapter 7 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17) by Brooke724

Arkham Slayers, Chapter 1 (Crossover with Batman, FR13) by xxmagex

Sinclair, Daughter of Chaos, Chapter 3 (Crossover with The Dresden Files, FR18) by Advena

A.F.E.W., Chapter 51 (Crossover with Fantastic Four, FR21) by cmdruhura

Mlinzi Mweupe, Chapter 3 (Crossover with Avengers, FR13) by RobertPAllison

Flash Back, Chapter 16 (Crossover with Hellsing, FR18) by Razial

[Images, Audio & Video]

Video:The One With More Feeling (NR) by periru3 and Tafadhali

Video:Die Young (T) by BeatriceEagle

Artwork:BTVS “Every Outfit” “Dead Man’s Party” part 2 Xx (sfw) by whatshisfaceblogs

Artwork:I wanna be sedated (Spike) (sfw) by balvana

Artwork:The First (sfw) by snakeliciousbaby

Artwork:Faith (sfw) by rebelprintinganddrawing

Manip Gifset: 'if the apocalypse comes, beep me' (sfw) by usermaxie

Manip Gifset:script to screen: s5e7 fool for love (sfw) by spuffygifs

Video: Buffy Summers - Born to Fly by juliaroxs241

Video: Damian - What You Feel (Cover) - Buffy the Vampire Slayer by Swiftblade Music

Video: The One With More Feeling - a Buffy Season 6 Fanvid by Periru3

Video: Buffy Summers - Rock You Like a Hurricane by juliaroxs241

Video: Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Hard Times by juliaroxs241

Video: The Story of Wesley Wyndam Price by Tatiana Marano Edits

[Reviews & Recaps]

FIGHT CLUB is SHAKING RN - Angel Reaction - 1x16 - The Ring by TheLexiCrowd

Slayer Sunday- Surprise by Jane Talks Reel

[Fandom Discussions]

My take on Anya/Spike by thenewbuzwuzz

Fuffy fights by starsandmoongay

Spike and Dawn shampoo headcanon by sspoike

Parallels between Slayers and artists by eyeofthebrainstorm

ATS S4/BTVS S7 Bangel by apollostrials

night vision by scaryscarier

The First Evil and Pride by Miss Muffet and Plasma

Favorite/Pinnacle Spuffy Moments by multiple authors

Does anyone dislike or even hate Buffy? by multiple authors

Angel # 4 of 8 (spoilers) by BAF

AtS - Heroic or Admirable Moments by Stoney and Nothing13

Willow making Scapulars by multiple authors

Is Buffy more a millenial or late Gen x show? Or Xennial by multiple authors

Wesley by multiple authors

Poll: Which one of these main characters did you want to slay? by OpeningKnowledge868

Can slayers kill witches/wizards? by Majiska394 and multiple authors

In the first ep of season 5 Eve says Angel can close the place down by multiple authors

Why does Dawn get so much hate? I personally really like her. by multiple authors

Selfless *spoilers* by multiple authors

Smashed by multiple authors

Willow completely screwed Anya and never made any real attempt to make it right by batapult and multiple authors

Am I the only one bothered that the scoobies spent joyce's insurance money? by multiple authors

My unpopular opinion is that season 5 lives up to the hype. It bounces back from the very divisive season 4 and has some of the all time best buffyverse episodes by madmaximus17 and multiple authors

Alternative to Blankets for Vampires and Sunlight by multiple authors

Does Xander ever get uh...better ig? by thesarcasmisreal and multiple authors

Why do you think Giles has never pushed for the slayers to get paid? by bapaou and multiple authors

The Scourge by multiple authors

Question about Season 6 by multiple authors

This monologue from Anya hit me the hardest. Amazing performance by multiple authors

Why isn't the slayer paid? by nudist--on--strike and multiple authors

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

PUBLICATION: Angel #4 Preview: Vampire Hygeine Problems Revealed via Bleeding Cool

PUBLICATION: Buffy the Vampire SLayer: Chaos Bleeds interviews via PSW Review Archive

Join the editor team :)

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

[duchessofostergotlands]

In yet another edition of “it’s a small world” this woman Jane is the step mother of Robert Rayne, the long term partner of Benita Refson who founded Place2Be

After her coronation in 1953, the Queen returned to Buckingham Palace with her Maids of Honour. While carrying her train, Lady Jane Vane-Tempest-Stewart tripped and caused the whole train to stop. Luckily the Queen saw the funny side and can be seen smiling at Jane’s tumble!  

[is0gild]

Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Bonus Chapter 7

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 20,116

Chapter Rating: PG-13...ish! Me being the very easily flustered writer that I am, I can tell you right now that no OVERLY graphic sexy things happen and there is a fade to black at the end, so it is all still fairly tame. But still, there is a lotta sexy innuendo and talk of sexy, ahem… ITEMS. Just wanted to drop a heads up since the rest of my story up to this point has been fairly PG for the most part, so didn’t want to blind side anyone!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

"Baby, all I want for Christmas is you."

Rayne stumbled a bit as she pushed the double stroller along, blowing out an amused little pft through her teeth. "Please, please tell me he did not actually say that!"

I sighed, hanging my head as I kept stride next to her, "He did. When I asked him for gift ideas, those were his exact words."

Anna erupted into laughter beside me, gripping my arm for support. "Dear lord, have I ever mentioned what a friggin' cliché, cheesy cornball your man is?"

"Not to mention no help at all," I grumbled, crossing my arms. "This is like Lea's birthday all over again. I mean, I know the stuff he likes, but honestly... what do you get for the man that buys everything and anything he wants for himself the second he sees it?"

"Don't worry, pumpkin," Rayne reached over to pat a comforting hand to my shoulder. "We wander around here long enough, something's sure to jump out at us eventually!"

"I hope so," I grimaced, not feeling so confident myself as we pressed onward through the crowded mall. I'd just gotten off my morning shift at the Ice Palace not too long ago and was still in my uniform minus the hat. It seemed I wasn't the only one who had to do some last minute holiday shopping, for that was the exact reason my sister and best friend had met up with me here as soon as I'd clocked out. With Christmas only a week away however, Dusk Town Center was understandably packed nearly to bursting. Merchandise was all but flying off the shelves in every store. Even if by some miracle I did manage to find the perfect gift here today, with my luck it'd probably be completely out of stock and backordered for months.

Gah, I shouldn't have kept putting this off for so long! But I had been racking my brain for weeks now for what to get him and had come up with zilch. Still had zilch. Ugh…

Last-minute-panicked-impulse-shopping don't fail me now!

Anna suddenly gasped and stopped walking. I took a few more steps before I slowed as well, glancing back at her with one eyebrow quirked. Her eyes weren't focused on me however as a slow grin spread across her face. "...what if we took Lea's words literally?"

Rayne and I exchanged a quick look. She shrugged, seemingly just as in the dark as I was. As mall traffic kept flowing unperturbed around us, my gaze settled on Anna once more and I snorted with a shake of my head, "What, you mean just put me under the tree gift-wrapped with a bow for Christmas morning?"

"Something like that, Sis," she giggled, suddenly latching on to my arm once more but now with a surprisingly strong grip.

Uh-oh… that impish gleam in her eye was making me nervous...

"Oh-ho, I see where she's going with this," Rayne sniggered before shifting the stroller over to be in front of me instead. "Here, take this." I blinked, my fingers automatically closing around the handlebar. Then she had seized hold of my other arm.

Oh gosh, her devilish little smirk was making me really, really nervous…

The ladies nodded at each other in unison in some unspoken agreement then without warning took off sprinting. I gasped and tripped over my own two feet, but managed to stay up right as I was dragged along with them. The sea of people parted for the stroller bearing two laughing infants like they were a friggin' pair of tiny Moses and we had zero trouble getting through, making a beeline straight for-

My eyes widened, "Oh no."

"Oh yes!" Anna cackled, tightening her hold on my arm.

I futilely dug my heels in, trying to put on the brakes. "No, no, no!"

"Yes, yes, yes!" Rayne answered in glee.

There was no use fighting it. This was happening. Like it or not, I had no choice but to charge headlong into a little shop known as…

...Esmeralda's Secrets.

I had just been forcibly manhandled into literal Underwear Hell. Everywhere as far as the eye could see, things were lacy… things were silky…

...things were fluffy.

Egads, the horror. The fluffy, fluffy, neon pink, leopard-printed utter horror.

I squeaked, squeezing my eyes closed and burying my face into my hands. I was almost surprised my palms didn't burn from how badly my cheeks were roasting.

I heard a chuckle from Rayne as I felt her trying to gently pry my fingers away from my eyes. "Don't play coy, sweetie, we're all grown-ups here! You act like you've never been in an adult happy fun-time store to buy some lingerie before!"

"Maybe because I haven't!" I dropped my hands to fix her with a hard stare. Instead, the recipient of my said stare turned out to be a mannequin in something skimpy, leathery and with far too many buckles. "Oh dear," I muttered, somehow managing to blush even harder as I looked away and held a hand up to block my line of sight to it.

"Really, Sis? You've never been in one of these places? Not ever, not even once?" Anna snerked, shaking her head. The sheer disbelief coloring her voice led me to believe that she had been in this type of store before. This was not a realization I was comfortable with. "But you're so…" she whistled, winking one eye shut as her hands traced an hour-glass figure in the air before me. "...and Lea's so…" now she trilled her tongue against the roof of her mouth, eyebrows bouncing as she mimed pouncing with curled, wriggling fingers. "...ya know what I mean?"

...was it sad that I did in fact know exactly what she meant?

Scrunching my eyes shut as I pressed my fingers between my eyebrows, I puffed out a low sigh. Then, rather awkwardly (scratch that... very, very awkwardly), I explained, "...while it's… true that we're quite, er… active in that, hrm… department… we, uh… r-rather, that is to say, lingerie is a particular… bedroom... adventure we've yet to have as of, um… as of yet."

I couldn't believe this was actually a conversation I was having with my baby sister.

She brightened. "Well then thank your lucky stars cuz I've just handed you the perfect Christmas present on a silver platter! You're welcome!"

I tipped my head to one side with a dubious frown. "...really?" Plucking a hanger bearing an intricate, ruffled bra from a nearby rack, I wrinkled my nose at it before putting it back. "Doesn't seem like it'd be the most meaningful, heartfelt gift…"

"Please!" Rayne batted a hand through the air with a snort. "It's not like it's an anniversary or anything, it's Christmas - a consumer holiday glorified by the big corporations to weasel as much munny as they can outta us! Not every gift has to be thoughtful and profound, you're allowed to just have a lil fun with it sometimes!"

"Still… I don't know…" I said slowly as my gaze wandered against my will towards a nearby case filled with… ah, hm… shall we say, recreational items? I quickly averted my eyes.

"How 'bout we just peruse a bit, 'kay? No harm in that!" Rayne grinned as she steered the stroller further into the store.

"Yeah, Sis, just let us peruse!" Anna beamed as she linked her arm in mine once more and tugged me into a stumbling walk.

I pressed my lips together into a thin line and said nothing as I let her guide me along. I mean, did I even have a choice? Really? Maybe the sooner I stopped arguing, the sooner we could get this whole embarrassing ordeal over with and leave.

As I let my eyes idly drift from one frilly garment to the next, I did have to begrudgingly concede that Anna and Rayne might actually be onto something here with the lingerie idea. Don't get me wrong, Lea had never made me feel pressured to, er… "dress up" for the occasion or anything like that. It was never even really a conversation we'd ever had, so honestly it wasn't something I'd particularly given much thought to before this very moment. That said, I could hardly see him being exactly opposed to the idea either. Far from it, in fact…

Thus why it might just make the perfect Christmas surprise.

Anna abruptly pulled us to an unexpected stop in front of another customer, drooping her eyelids at the individual as she informed him, "You know that'd be more of a Christmas gift for you than for her, right?"

The gentleman in question paled, choking back a startled, "Huh?" and looking rather guilty as he stood there with the sheer, sparkly spaghetti-strapped thong dangling from his fingers that'd he'd been mulling over.

Rayne stepped up beside us, parking her stroller with it aimed directly at the guy as she deadpanned, "For shame! My babies judge you!"

He blinked, glancing down at the infants. Cayde and Aria squealed and burbled back. Turning bright red and dropping the underwear, he made a hasty retreat out of the shop.

"Haha, yes! That was too fun, Ray-Ray!" Anna snickered, giving her a high five. As I pinched the bridge of my nose with a tiny shake of my head, Anna asked, "What?"

I grumbled, "Being in a lingerie store by myself would be mortifying enough, but it's just now dawning on me how utterly ridiculous it is that I'm in here with my sister and a mom who brought her two babies."

"Psh, they're fine with it," Rayne brushed off, redirecting her gaze to someone nearby who seemed to work here. "Excuse me, Miss, you're fine with my tots being here, right?"

The woman turned to face us with a warm smile. She had long, wavy raven hair, eyes as green and sparkly as emeralds, and the kind of figure that would probably be pictured in a dictionary next to the word "voluptuous." In short, exactly the kind person any boss who ran a lingerie store would be positively thrilled to hire as an employee. She hummed a soft laugh as she waved a finger in greeting to the twins, "Of course! I actually have a kid of my own back home… Djali looks to be just about their age, maybe a few months older. Anyway, I completely understand and have no problem at all with you bringing them in here."

"Told ya," Rayne smugly razzed her tongue in victory at me.

And this prime example of maturity was a parent, folks.

Rolling my eyes but fighting a grin, I then glimpsed the worker's name tag and furrowed my brow. "Wait… you're Esmeralda?" I blinked a couple times. "...that's not just a fancy name they put on the store sign?"

"Nope! I own and operate this lil business," the woman smiled proudly now.

"Well then, Esmeralda, I hafta ask…" one corner of Anna's lips turned up as she leaned to whisper conspiratorially, "What's your secret?"

A little snort escaped her nose before she gestured back towards the front of the store, "Not letting creeps like that get to me."

Looking out the shop windows back into the mall proper, we now all spotted a rather sinister-looking old man standing out there who seemed to be… protesting? He was holding up a sign aimed directly at this little boutique bearing in big, bold letters the words (and I kid you not): SINNERS, REPENT. Other mall shoppers were giving the man a wide berth as he just stood there a few feet away from the entrance into here, glaring. Gosh, how had we not seen him on our way in? Maybe he'd arrived after us.

"Ugh," Rayne scrunched up her nose in distaste at the sight of the man. "What's ol' Skeezy McSkeezerson's problem?"

"He's just some religious nutjob who thinks my little," up came her fingers to provide air quotes, "den of iniquity here is ruining the wholesome, family friendliness of the mall. Ignore Frollo, he's harmless."

Anna raised an eyebrow, "You're chummy enough with that gnarly bag of bones to know his name?"

Chuckling, Esmeralda shrugged, "Kind of hard not to know it, what with him harassing me every morning when I come to open shop and every night when I lock up. Luckily, he's not brave enough to follow me inside, probably too afraid he'll fall victim all this sin and debauchery hanging on the racks. This place is my sanctuary," she glanced around with a contented sigh. Then she clapped her hands together once, flashing her best customer service smile now. "But that's enough talk about that! Is there anything I can help you lovely ladies out with today?"

"Perhaps you can assist my beautiful bestie here by helping her pick out some sexy underwear for her to show off to her man," Rayne beamed, slinging an arm around my shoulders. "You'll hafta forgive her, she's a tad clueless cuz she's a bit of a lingerie virgin."

"Hmmmmm," Esmeralda slowly circled me as she tapped a curled finger to chin. I felt a heat rising to my face once again under such scrutiny and I began fidgeting with my braid. "...yes, I can already picture a few of my items that could suit you perfectly. But first, tell me a little about your beau - do you think he could handle being subjected to some of our more…" she paused, a sly little gleam flitting across her eyes now as she smirked, "...risqué outfits?"

Forget him, I don't think I could handle being subjected to some of their more risqué outfits!

Before I could respond however, Anna chimed in with, "Oh don't worry, Lea can handle them! Trust me, he's as red blooded and virile as they come!"

"Anna!" I gasped, horrified as I strangled my braid harder.

She gave my shoulder a light, playful shove, "C'mon, Sis, you think I can't friggin' hear you two going at it whenever I spend the night on your living room couch?"

I nearly tore my braid straight out of my scalp.

Face? What face? No, I no longer had one and in its place now was nothing but a raging inferno.

"I- He- We- Tha-" I spluttered and stammered, unable to complete a coherent thought, much less sentence.

"Aw, I think you broke her," Rayne cooed with a little giggle, patting me on the head.

Esmeralda had already set to work, drifting from one rack to the next, seemingly knowing exactly where to find each thing she was looking for as she quickly and efficiently riffled through the garments, plucking up hangers here and there to toss over her arm before moving to the next one. Before long, she'd returned to stand in front of me with an assortment of delicates neatly stacked in the crook of her elbow. "I've picked out a few options for you for starters, just let me know if you see any you'd like to try on." With that, she held up the first one.

...I did not understand what I was even looking at here. Like, at all. Was she holding it upside down?

Though I made no comment, my expression must have told her everything. "Alright, not your cup of tea. Moving along," she smiled good-humoredly as she set that one aside and lifted up another one for me to look at.

Good lord, was that supposed to be lingerie or a net? The thing was more holes than fabric. Just how many limbs did they think I had?

Tucking that one away as well, she laughed, "Take it that one's a no too. Don't worry, I have a good feeling about this next one." She showed it to me and…

...actually? It wasn't too distressing.

No, it was actually a rather classy and tasteful kind of sexy, with its silk and its hint of lace and its overbust corset in a deep, rich blue.

I hesitated with a thoughtful frown before reaching a hand out to gingerly take it from her. Cheeks still simmering away, I pursed my lips to one side as I considered it for a few seconds longer, then mumbled, "You said something about being able to try them on?"

Esmeralda smiled brightly. "Follow me, I'll take you to a fitting room."

As she started leading me towards the back, I was suddenly halted in my tracks when I heard, "Sis! Sis!" My eyebrows knit together as I turned my head towards Anna's voice. I spotted her over by one of the wall shelves, holding something up high over her head and waving it about with an almost manic glee as Rayne smothered snickers into her hand beside her. "You should get this for Lea too!"

It took me a second to realize what it was she had in her hand, but when I did, every last drop of blood in my body came hurtling up into my face.

"No!" I shouted across the store. "No way! I am not buying that!"

I bought it.

But only because Anna wouldn't stop pestering me about the stupid thing until I did.

I hadn't been able to bring myself to gift-wrap it with the lingerie that I'd also ended up purchasing. Heck, I'd barely been able to bring myself to wrap the lingerie itself, but what exactly else could I have done? Surprised him with it by just walking into the bedroom wearing it? Please, as if I could ever be so bold - I'd practically burst into flames from all the blushing I'd been doing just wrapping the dang thing. As for the other thing, I'd just panicked and hid it away wedged between the bedframe and underside of our mattress for the time being until I could figure out something else to do with it.

Thankfully, I'd also managed to come up with a second gift to give Lea. In a sudden surge of inspiration out of the blue, I'd gotten the idea to get him a vintage movie reel projector. I could just picture him getting all excited about collecting all of his cheesy classics he loved so much in their original format so we could watch them "the way they were meant to be watched" or something like that. Finding one used online hadn't been all that difficult or expensive, not to mention thank goodness for overnight shipping! The device itself was big but not all that heavy, almost shockingly so - I'd easily been able to lug it around myself for getting it all wrapped and whatnot.

So there my two presents sat in the living room as Christmas Eve dawned, beneath a tiny yet festively decorated tree that we had to constantly keep Marshmallow from trying to eat. It was hard to blame the giant fuzzball though really - now almost fully grown, Marshmallow was bigger than the dinky little pine so was it any real wonder that he seemed to consider it his new favorite chew toy?

In any case, me getting Lea more than one gift seemed to have worked out for the best as it hadn't slipped my notice that he'd also gotten me a couple things that were currently nestled there at the base of that tree. Our small cluster of presents were really only there for the sake of appearances at the moment. We weren't going to be here on Christmas day itself. We were in fact just a few minutes away from hitting the road to spend the holidays in my family's sizable cabin tucked away up in the snowy mountains surrounding Arendelle. Luckily, the only actual relatives that would be there were Anna and Saïx, with the rest of the guest rooms being filled out by a handful of our friends we'd invited to join us for the holidays. In any case, all we had left to do before we departed was finish getting dressed, wrap up packing with a few last minute supplies, toss the presents into the car trunk, wrangle Marshmallow into the backseat and then we'd be off.

Thus my mild surprise when just as I'd finish rinsing my dish from breakfast, I felt Lea wrapping his arms around my waist to hug me from behind as he nuzzled my neck and whispered, "Hey, how 'bout we each open up one of our presents a day early? It'll be fun, whaddya say?"

I glanced over my shoulder at him and he flashed me a cheeky little grin. I blinked a couple times, then peeked over towards our teeny tree in the living room. More specifically, at the gifts beneath it. At one gift in particular.

You know… that gift.

I hastily averted my gaze, feeling my cheeks warm.

Drat, had he noticed which one my eyes had zeroed in on?

Clearing my throat as I set the dish in the drying rack, I asked casually, "Do we really have the time? We're already running a bit behind, we should've been on the highway ten minutes ago."

"We're already late, what's a few extra measly minutes?"

I tried again, "But today? Right now? ...it's not even Christmas yet."

"Pfft, what, like the holiday police are gonna bust us for bending the rules a lil?" he chuckled low as he gave my ear a playful nip before pulling away, spinning me around to face him. "Misbehave, live a lil! Being bad never felt so good! 'Sides, I'm just dying to know whatcha got me. C'mon, it's just one present each, we'll still have others to rip open on jolly ol' Saint Nick's Day tomorrow."

I had to resist the urge to look at that gift again.

Damn it, girl, be cool.

Instead, I smiled and relented with a small sigh, "Alright, fine. Only one though, got it?"

"Course!" he beamed, before gesturing a hand towards the living room with a slight bow of his head. "Ladies first."

I walked past him, exiting the kitchen and approaching where our tree stood guard over its little horde of presents. I considered them for a few seconds before picking out a bright red, flat-ish one decorated in nutcracker soldier printed gift wrap. Then I moved to the couch, making room by easing Marshmallow over a bit where he laid conked out in a deep sleep (on his back and with his tongue lolled out) before I took a seat on the middle cushion.

As I watched Lea approach the pile of gifts now to pick one out for himself, I couldn't help a small twitch as I suddenly began to regret every poor life choice I'd made that'd led up to me buying that stupid lingerie. I mean, seriously, what had I been thinking when I'd let Rayne and Anna talk me into getting that silly thing? What would I even possibly say when Lea unwrapped it? How would I- no, shush, relax, Elsa, it'll all be fine. Lea probably wasn't even going to pick that one. He was probably more curious about whatever the bigger, flashier-looking one could be - it was probably the whole reason he'd even suggested opening a couple right now. Yeah, that had to be it! There was no way he could be interested the measly, smaller, less fancy looking pres-

Fudge, he'd picked the lingerie.

Jerk probably had caught me staring at it.

"Are you sure that's the one you want to open now?" I blurted out before my mind could catch up. Noting the slight tremor to my voice, I cleared my throat and gave a tiny nervous laugh, my fingers absently picking at the tape on my own present. "The other one's bigger. Clunkier, you might even say. Could be a lot of work hauling it all the way up to the cabin, then hauling it all the way back. Maybe it'd be better if you just opened that one here instead."

"Nah, I don't mind lugging it back and forth," he laughed as he plopped down onto the sofa on my other side opposite of Marshmallow, settling the abomination that was my gift into his lap. "I could use the workout anyhow! This glorious physique don't just happen on its own, ya know!" he grinned, flexing one arm and kissing his bicep.

I gave a soft snort. "True, I suppose you have to burn off all that ice cream you consume by the gallon somehow," I poked a gentle fingertip to his belly.

"Hey now, maybe I wouldn't eat so much o' the crap if the girl working at the Ice Palace weren't such a cutie," he leaned towards me with a wink.

"Oh-ho, no," I waggled a finger in his face. "You were a sugar junkie long before I got a job there, so don't even try to blame your sweet tooth on me."

He smirked. "Who said I was talking 'bout you?"

I smacked him in the face with one of the couch's throw pillows.

"I mean, obviously I was talking 'bout you, babe!" He reached over to tweak my nose, "You're the cutest chick who works there, no contest! ...literally, cuz you're the only chick who works there, so that's not even really saying mu-"

I whacked him with the pillow again.

"I kid, I kid, c'mon, you know I think you're the most gorgeous creature in all of creation! Gimme that thing before you fluffily bludgeon me to death," he snerked, confiscating the cushion from me and tucking it away between the armrest and his hip before nudging my shoulder with his. "Now go on, open up my present to ya already!"

With a tiny shake of my head at him, I redirected my focus to the nicely wrapped gift in my lap and began carefully removing the tape. Once I'd made enough of an opening, I liberated a thin box from within. Raising an eyebrow, I lifted the lid off to discover two long, green slips of sturdy paper inside decorated with a logo on one half and lots of teeny printed text filling the rest of it. I picked them up with a little frown, squinting as I read them, then gasped and shot up to my feet, the box tumbling out of my lap down to the carpet. "How?! How did you manage to get tickets?! This musical has been sold out for months!"

"I have my ways," he sighed smugly, slouching down more comfortably into the sofa cushion. "We should be able to squeeze it in before the end of winter break, so figured we could take in the show, spend a few days in the big apple, make a whole trip outta it, ya know?"

"That… that sounds amazing, that-" I cut myself off, suddenly at a loss for words. Broadway was currently running my favorite musical - the one that song was from that I'd chosen to audition with for our community theater's Wicked tryouts. I'd been dying to go and Lea knew that, but tickets had been impossible to get. Not so for him, it seemed. I hastily sat back down, grabbing a fistful of his shirt and yanking him over to me to kiss him thoroughly. Smiling against his lips, I then drew back just enough to whisper, "Thank you… this means a lot to me."

"Don't mention it," he murmured back, gaze hooded as he nudged the tip of my nose with his. Then he pulled away, eyes lighting up a bit as he eagerly rubbed his hands together over his own present now. "Alright, my turn!"

I paled, heart all but flatlining in my chest. Crud, I'd completely forgotten. Here Lea had picked out something super sweet and thoughtful for me, and what had I gotten him in return?

Underwear.

Nay, not just underwear.

Friggin' frilly underwear.

"No!" I yelped, lunging for it just as he'd ripped some of the wrapping paper off one corner. Managing to snatch it out of his hands, I scrambled to stand and get it away from him. He stared blankly at me, one eyebrow quirked. Eyes darting wildly about, I said, "No, this… you don't want to open this one! This one's, er…" I hid it behind my back, biting my bottom lip, "...it's nothing really, it's- you know what? Let's get you the other one! Yes, that's the one you want, and this one you can open, er… never? Yeah, let's say never! In fact, let's just completely forget this one ever existed and I'll go get you the other-"

Just as I'd turned to make my way back over to the tree, Lea snaked one arm out and snagged the gift back with a chipper little, "Yoink!"

"Hey!" I tried to steal it back from him, but he'd stood up to his full height, holding it high above his head where it was easily out of my reach.

Curse him, his stupid tall self and his stupid, stupid long arms!

He chuckled as he pressed a quick peck to my forehead, "Now I know this is for sure the one I wanna open. With you getting all flustered over it, whatever it is has gotta be good!"

"But-"

"Ah-ah!" his finger booped me on the nose before he plonked back down into his seat on the couch. "Ya know it only makes me wanna open it more the harder you fight it, right? Just let it go, El, it's happening."

My lips pinched sourly before I huffed and sat down as well. I grabbed another throw pillow and hugged it tightly to my chest, burying my face in it just enough for me to peek out anxiously over the top.

Alright, fine. Let's get this impending trainwreck over with.

But I swear, this is the last time I listen to any advice Anna and Rayne give me ever again.

I tried not to flinch with each little tear he made in the gift wrap, the cartoony frolicking reindeers and elves printed on it seeming so deceptively innocent now when you considered what scandalous secrets lay hidden beneath them. All too soon, he was balling up the tattered remains and tossing them over his shoulder before opening the box, shifting the neatly folded tissue paper within aside and-

His whole body went still. Then he blinked once. Then twice. "Huh," was all he said at first. Then with a bemused little upward curve to one corner of his lips, he was delicately lifting the lingerie up out of the box in all its salacious glory. "...babe, I'm flattered, but blue's not really my color."

...oh god, the big clueless dope thought I'd given it to him as a joke for him to wear. He didn't realize-

Fudge, now I had to spell it out for him.

Having to wonder how my brain was not melting straight out of my ears at this point what with how badly my face was broiling, I set the pillow aside, folded my hands in my lap, sat up a little straighter and opened my mouth. Then swiftly snapped it back shut, cheeks cranking up the heat even further.

How… do I even put this?

Taking a deep breath, I tried again, "But it is… my color..."

He dropped the garment, eyes growing round and expression slack. "Oh." A pause. Then, "Oh, so you'd be the one who'd- oh." Picking it up again, a huge, lopsided grin spread across his suddenly rather flushed face as he eyed it in a whole new light now. "...oh, I see."

Fingers strangling the life out of each other in my lap, I looked away as I went on, "I know it's not as nice or as… sincere as your gift to me was, but I promise my other present is much better and-"

"No, no, none of that now, it's- I- this is-" Apparently struggling to find the right words to do justice to what he wanted to say, he instead settled for schooling his expression to be almost comically stoic as he gave big, emphatic nods with a thumbs up that then shifted into forming an O with his thumb and forefinger, signaling his approval.

I perked up a little uncertainly. "...you mean you like it? Really?"

"Oh yeah, trust me, I like it… really, really like it." Lea then cleared his throat, knee bouncing up and down as his fingers idly traced back and forth over the lace embroidered into the silky fabric. "Sooooo, heh… when do we take this baby out for its first test spin? ...now? Or say, I dunno, uh…" he shrugged, clearly trying (and failing) not to sound too eager as he repeated, "now?"

Down, boy.

I bit back a tiny smile. "No, now we should be on the road and making our way towards the cabin," I said as I rose to my feet to head towards the bedroom, snatching the lingerie from his grasp as I moved past him.

"Hey!" He vaulted himself over the backrest of the couch in the flash, hot on my heels. "That's mine!"

Crossing my arms as I spun around to face him, I said, "Yes, but I'm simply taking it to pack it with my things so we have it for the trip."

"Oh." Lea was grinning so big again now, it crinkled his guyliner. "I'll allow this."

"How very magnanimous of you," I snorted, turning to continue my journey to the bedroom once more. "I'm going to go finish packing and getting dressed, while you-" Just as I'd stepped through the door, I glanced back to discover he'd followed me in here. "...just where do you think you're going?"

He hunched down to my eye level, eyebrows bouncing over his half-lidded gaze. "To help ya get dressed, of course."

"Uh-uh. No," I planted a hand firmly to his chest, forcing him to walk in reverse and back out of the room. "I know that look. We don't have time for that look, we're late enough as it is. You stay out here, clean up the trashed wrapping paper, and get the rest of the gifts and Marshmallow out to the car."

"Aw c'mon, El, ya gotta lemme in there so I can help you," he insisted.

I gave him a flat look. "...do I? Do I really? Enlighten me then, please… why do I 'gotta' let you in here?"

"Er… cuz I'm a charming, lovable scamp with devilish good looks that you just can't say no to?"

I drooped my eyelids at him. Then I shut the door in his face, locking it for good measure.

Charm your way through that, scamp.

My cheeks puffed as I blew out a long breath, taking a second to fan my still very heated face with my hands. I then crossed the room, tossing Lea's gift next to where my almost fully packed suitcase laid open atop the bed. I set to work grabbing whatever else I needed - things like my charger and whatnot - and stuffed them into my travel case.

I then paused in a brief moment of indecision before sighing, rolling my eyes, and sticking my hand under the mattress to retrieve the other thing that Anna had made me buy from Esmeralda's Secrets. I frowned at it, then turned and held it up as I asked, "What do you think? Should I take it along?"

Bruni blinked back at me from inside his terrarium, cocking his head. Then can you guess what the little salamander did next? Go on, take a wild guess.

If your answer involved his tongue, his eyeball, and/or the swiping of said tongue over said eyeball, then you'd be correct.

I snorted. "You know, we really need to get you some new talking points as I feel you've pretty much said all you can say with that one at this point," I told him as I double checked he had enough food in there with him to keep him amply fed while we were gone. Then I gave the thing in my grip one final glance with a tiny shake of my head before tucking it away inside my luggage, burying it deep beneath several layers of clothing. Chances were good it'd never see the light of day, but why not bring it just in case? I mean, the lingerie had been such a hit and we hadn't even gotten to the fun part with it yet. I could imagine this thing would probably be met with equally rave reviews from Lea as well, should I muster up the courage to actually bring it out.

Now all I needed to do was pack the lingerie, get dressed, and go. I picked it up, dangling it before me as I considered it for a moment. My lips pursed to one side.

...an idea was beginning to take form in my mind.

A little wicked one.

A supremely stupid one.

One that was only asking for trouble.

Honestly, I don't know what possessed me to do it.

But I did it anyway.

"Everyone else is there already. I can't believe we're actually going to be the last ones to arrive," I muttered, narrowing my eyes at the text message from Anna on my phone.

"Bah, don't sweat it," Lea chuckled as he sped his car down the highway. We'd been on it for about twenty minutes now. He glanced over at me, tipping his aviators down just enough to wink over the rim, "Just means they'll have our hot cocoa ready and waiting for us in a couple o' steaming mugs by the time we get there."

My throat gave a small, noncommittal hmph. "Just be glad Anna's insisting on saving the master bedroom for us instead of calling dibs on it for her and Kristoff," I told him, pocketing my phone once more. Then I said, "I still think it was silly of Saïx to drive out ahead of us on his own instead of carpooling with us. He would've been able to sleep on the ride over."

He flicked on his blinker as our lane began to merge with the next one over. "Think he plans to bail on our lil holiday bonanza a day or two earlier than the rest of us. 'Sides, pretty sure he wasn't too keen on the idea of being the overstuffed fleabag's snuggle buddy on the whole drive over," he sniggered as he stretched a hand behind him into the backseat without looking to give Marshmallow a couple of affectionate pats to the head. "Hey!" he quickly snatched the hand back when his love was reciprocated with tooth hugs.

"Well then, his loss." I grinned as I twisted around in my seat to give the dog scritches under the chin, cooing, "Isn't that right, Marshmallow?"

Did that sound like an invitation to come sit in my lap? Because apparently to Marshmallow, it did. In the blink of an eye, he'd excitedly squeezed his way through the space between our two front seats to crush me under the mountain of white fluff that was him, tail thumping away at a mile a minute against the dash. Quite a feat considering there was barely enough space in the car seat to accommodate the colossal canine alone, much less the both of us. To this day, I'm still not quite sure how Marshmallow had managed to wedge himself up here with me.

After much cackling from Lea and wheezed coaxing from me, Marshmallow was finally persuaded a few minutes later to clamber back into the backseat once more, though not without a healthy dose of whining and puppy-dog pouting. Able to breathe again, I inhaled deeply as I began to straighten myself back out - the assault of doggy cuddles had left me in a bit of a disarray. I swept the few stray pale tendrils of my hair that had escaped back into my bun, smoothed the rumples out of my off the shoulder button-up blouse, and-

"Holy shit, is that... Under your clothes, you're already wearing it?!" Lea fumbled with his shades, perching them atop his head as his suddenly wide-eyed stare was now in a tug-of-war between my leg and watching the road.

With a start, I glanced down to discover that Marshmallow's little snuggle ambush had caused my knee-length skirt with a side-slit to ride up a bit, revealing the lacy garter (complete with a little blue bow) wrapped around my thigh that was holding up my black sheer stockings. Blushing furiously, I hastily jerked the hem of my skirt back down to hide it again and awkwardly avoided his gaze as I crossed my legs, mumbling, "...maybe."

Yes.

I was already wearing it.

"It" being the lingerie.

Which, by the way if you hadn't guessed by now, was the supremely stupid thing I'd decided to do.

Lea said nothing, just continued to gawk at me.

Gosh, if my cheeks burned any brighter, Santa would be asking me to guide his sleigh tonight instead of Rudolph.

Talk. I needed to talk. To fill this silence that was making me fidget restlessly under his gaze. Go on, mouth, just move and make with the words already. Any words. "...it's... actually rather comfortable." ...okay? "The lingerie, that is." Oh good. Thanks for clarifying the obvious. "Wouldn't think it would be. Would've thought it'd be more designed in favor of being, ah… aesthetically pleasing at the expense of comfort." Oh dear, where was I going with this? "I mean, I tried it on before buying it. Of course I did, it'd be silly not to at least make sure it- but, you know, I only had it on for a grand total of a minute in the fitting room, not really long enough to tell if- but now that I've had it on for an, er… extended period, I can say that it's, uh… it's quite comfortable. The silk is real nice, real… smooth against the skin." I take it back. Stop talking. Stop talking this instant. "Fits like a glove, as the saying goes, not… tight or restricting at all like I'd imagined it might be. The whole thing's really quite flexible with a plenty of give, actually…" Your license to speak has been revoked, mouth, you hear me? Zip it! "I shouldn't have any problems bending or twisting into any sort of posi-"

The car beside us suddenly blared its horn - apparently Lea had been a little too preoccupied by my line of discussion and in his distraction had begun to accidentally drift into the next lane over. "Fuck," he hissed, swerving us back into our proper lane. Clearing his throat as he shot the other vehicle a quick, apologetic wave, he told me, "Love, I'm dying to hear the end of that sentence, trust me, I'm highly invested at this point, but we're gonna hafta put a pin in it and circle back round to it later cuz this is a dangerous conversation to be having with a man while he's driving."

You heard the man, mouth. Friggin' cram it.

Pressing my lips firmly together, I tugged at the hem of my skirt again and gave a single curt nod, making no further comment.

We drove in silence for a minute as the trees of the forest around us blurred past our windows. Lea's eyes kept flicking to me out of the corner of his peripheral. He coughed into his fist and vigorously ruffled his fingers through his hair before returning his grip to the wheel. His knee began to jiggle up and down. Then, "Hey, uh… how 'bout we make a pit stop somewhere?"

I glanced towards him, my head tipping to one side. "A pit stop?"

"Yeah, so we can, ya know... stretch our legs… and other things," he wickedly smirked as he reached over the center console for my hand and brought it up to his lips, bouncing his eyebrows at me over my knuckles as he pressed a kiss to them.

A noise that was half laugh, half scoff escaped me. "There's not another rest stop for miles."

He shrugged. "I'm not picky. I'm sure a nice thicket could do in a pinch."

I gave him a flat look. "...a thicket? Really?"

"What? I'll make sure it's a romantic one! A classy one!"

"And how, pray tell, do you make a thicket classy?" I crossed my arms under my chest, arching an eyebrow at him.

"By keeping our pinkies raised the whole time!" Lea beamed, holding one hand up and wiggling his little finger.

Snorting, I shook my head. "No stops until we get there, understood?"

A harsh little huff emitted from his throat, "Fine." Then his foot pressed down harder on the gas and the engine thrummed louder as we started passing the other cars more quickly.

I hummed a soft laugh, "Oh sure, now you're in a hurry to get there."

"Well yeah! Ya said it yourself: we're late. Just trynta make up for lost time!" One corner of his lips quirked up as he added, "'Sides, the sooner we get there, the sooner I can unwrap my present."

"You know you're not allowed to open the other one until tomorrow morning," I tutted.

"That's not what I meant and you know it," he not so subtly eyed me up and down, leaving zero doubt as to exactly what he meant.

Suppressing the urge to squirm, my hands swiped the nonexistent wrinkles out of my skirt as I dropped a casual, "Goodness, all this fuss and you haven't even seen part two of your gift yet."

He shot me a double-take. "Jesus Christ, there's a part two?!"

I'm with him, there's a part two?! Mouth, what are you even-

...oh dear, I was talking about the thing tucked away in my luggage between my dresses and my nightgown, wasn't I?

Damn Anna to the bloody ninth circle of hell for ever making me buy that infernal thing!

Alright, mouth, we can still get out of this. Remember the three B's: backtrack, backtrack, backtrack! Just go on and work your magic.

"Guess you'll just have to wait until later tonight to find out."

...mouth, you're fired.

Lea gave a low whistle and grinned big. "Somebody musta told Santa that I've been a very good boy this year," he murmured, his gaze drifting towards me again. Then traveling downward. Searching. As if he could somehow catch a glimpse of the lingerie hidden beneath through sheer force of will alone.

"Hey now, eyes on the road, mister," I chided.

He pouted, but did as he was told.

I snorted, "What's with the face? It's not like you can see anything anyway, you don't have x-ray vision."

"And I curse my goddamn maker every day for such a heinous oversight," he grumbled under his breath as he slipped his aviators back down onto his face.

We ended up making it to the cabin in record time. It wasn't currently snowing, but a thick glittering blanket of white had coated everything around us, from the ground to the trees to the cabin itself. Lea parked us next to the other cars and as he shut off the engine and the heat with it, I shrugged into my long heavy coat. I probably didn't really need it, the walk to the door would take less than ten seconds and I'd never been one to freeze easily, but it would be one less thing to carry.

Marshmallow was making it abundantly clear he was ready to no longer be trapped inside the car as he pawed at the back door and whimpered. Chuckling and telling him to hang on, I reached back to clip on his leash before exiting the vehicle myself, my knee high boots sinking into the snow as I let him out. He nearly ripped my arm out of my socket when he tried to bolt to investigate his new strange surroundings with all its new strange scents, but I managed to keep him in check if only just barely. Lea, having wrapped a black and red checkered scarf around his neck and donned his own thick jacket, took it upon himself to grab our suitcases seeing as how I pretty much had my hands full maintaining control of Marshmallow.

"We're here!" I called out as I opened the front door and let Marshmallow pull me inside, Lea following us and kicking the door shut behind him before dumping our things on the floor. As I knelt down to remove the leash once more, Marshmallow's nostrils suddenly flared with a big sniff before his ears perked and he went very still, his eyes intently focused on the hallway that led to the main sitting room. Oh-ho, I knew who he smelled. The second the leash was unclipped, the big wall of fur excitedly charged off deeper into the house.

I shook my head with a tiny grin as I slipped out of my coat and folded it over the banister next to the entrance. Before I could follow in my dog's tracks however, I felt Lea's hand closing around mine. He gently tugged me back and spun me around to face him, backing me up against the banister as he planted his hands on top of it to either side of me, trapping me between it and his body. Then he was leaning in real close, eyes hooded as his nose brushed alongside mine, his breath tickling my lips as he purred, "Ya know what I was thinking?"

I gave a low hum, reaching up to straighten his collar before resting my hands against his chest, absently smoothing out any creases in the fabric as I asked softly, "What were you thinking?"

His eyes crinkled slightly as he dipped his head, nosing the sensitive skin just beneath my ear and making me shiver. "Was thinkin' you should help me take the luggage to our room."

Translation: he was eager to "unwrap his gift."

A smile tugged at one corner of my mouth. "I see. Well, here's what I'm thinking…"

"Mm-hm," he prompted distractedly, straightening up just enough to try and go in for a kiss.

He probably thought he could seduce me to our bedroom with the power of his lips alone. And you know, he might have been right. He was a really good kisser.

Which is why I clamped my hand over his mouth at the last second, grinned sweetly up at him and said, "I'm thinking I know how much you love being a gentleman and I would simply hate to rob you of this ideal moment of chivalry by offering any sort of help with our suitcases. You're welcome." I lightly patted him on the cheek before trying to slip free of his arms. I didn't make it far however before he'd snagged me around the waist, pulling me up against him. I sighed, "Come on, Lea, the others are waiting for us."

"And they can wait a lil bit longer while we…" that wicked curve to his lips resurfaced, "settle in. It'll be fine, we'll see them later tonight." A thoughtful pause before he waggled his eyebrows, hooking a finger under my chin as he began to lean in once more, murmuring, "Make that tomorrow."

"There you two are!" Anna suddenly came bursting into the room with her signature bubbly laugh. "Was beginning to think you got friggin' lost!"

Whew! Saved by the baby sister!

Don't get me wrong, Lea was making a tempting offer. More than tempting. It's just that we hadn't made the trip all the way up to this cabin only to just lock ourselves in a room together for god knew how long. No, I'd come here to spend time with my friends and family. It was rather rare that I actually chose to spend time with a large group of people, but something about the holidays brought that out in me I suppose. There would be plenty of time for that other stuff later after everyone had turned in for the night. Lea would just have to wait his turn.

His shoulders slumped and he sulked a bit at being interrupted, but Anna hardly noticed as she snagged my arm, "C'mon, everyone's in the living room!"

"Hold it!" Lea hadn't let go of my hand yet. "El's gotta, uh… help me find our room first!"

"Oh! Up the stairs, first one on the left, you can't miss it!" Anna happily chirped, not wasting another second to drag me off.

He reluctantly let my fingers slip free of his this time as he released a low, grumbling huff. I glanced back at him as I let myself be towed along, crinkling my nose in amusement. He crinkled his back, though his was oozing snark. Could a nose crinkle even be snarky? Because if it could, his was decidedly so. With that, I lost sight of him as I was yanked around the corner and down the hall.

I could hear the rumble of chatter and laughter growing louder as we drew near before we stepped into the large family room. Everyone was seated cozily around the large roaring fireplace. Sora had little Cayde (or at least, I thought it was Cayde… I was still getting the hang of telling them apart) settled in his lap while both he and Kairi laughed and made goofy faces for the baby. Riku was nearby, keeping his watchful dad eye on them while holding a conversation with Kristoff at the same time. Rayne and Aria were nowhere to be seen, but I suspected the latter had probably been in need of a change and so had been taken into another room to have that dealt with.

Marshmallow was exactly where I expected him to be - sprawled across Saïx's lap, whether Saïx liked it or not. It looked like there might have been a bit of a kerfuffle for Saïx seemed slightly ruffled, but in the end he'd apparently just accepted his fate and currently had his laptop settled on Marshmallow's back as he typed away at it, a mildly miffed expression twisting his face behind his glasses. Roxas and Xion were seated in armchairs close to him, snickering and shoving each other's shoulders over something.

"Look who I found!" Anna announced as she brought me further into the room. They all looked up and I was met with a round of boisterous greetings. Giving my arm one final squeeze before releasing it, Anna said, "Have a seat! I'll go bring in the snacks now that we're all here!"

I began, "Oh, I'd be happy to help with-"

"No, that's fine! I really only require the assistance of one big, handsome, strapping gentleman and I have just the perfect one in mind..." As she spoke those words, Kristoff perked up and turned his head towards her with a huge smile. "...Sora!"

"Huh, wha?" Sora froze mid-squishing his cheeks together for Cayde at the sound of his own name, blinking a couple times. Kristoff looked positively crestfallen.

Anna snerked. "Kidding! Of course I was talking about you, you big dummy," she planted a quick peck to Kristoff's chin, which seemed to mollify him. Then she gathered both his hands in hers with a chipper, "Now c'mon!" before tugging him off towards the kitchen.

I grinned after them before glancing around for a place to sit. Saïx and Marshmallow were the only ones on their couch and though my beloved four-legged friend did admittedly take up a lot of space, the two of them were on the far side of it and it was a long couch so there was still plenty of room left. I eased myself down on the opposite end from them beside where the "kiddos" had seemingly picked up their conversation right where it'd left off.

"'Lemme copy your homework, Xion. Do all the work on the group project, Xion,'" she was reciting in a voice that I believe was a mock imitation of Roxas's. Then she gave a scoff, albeit in good-humor, "I swear, Rox, I'm nothing more than just a puppet for you to boss around."

"That's right, dance on my strings, puppet!" Roxas cackled back, waggling his fingers in the air above his head as if to manipulate said imaginary strings and earning himself yet another shove to his shoulder.

I listened with half an ear, momentarily distracted as my eyes scanned the room. Where was it? I knew it just had to be here somew-

Ah-ha! There! Dangling from the archway Anna and I had just come through a moment before.

Mistletoe.

I silently filed away its location for later. It'd be useful. Trust me.

"Just be grateful winter break arrived in the nick of time to save your punk ass because I was this close to throttling you," Xion sighed, rolling her eyes before flashing me a long-suffering smile. "I tell ya, Elsa, one of these days this doof will no longer have me around to cover for him and he'll be a total wreck without me!"

He looked aghast, clutching his chest. "No! Xion, you could never abandon me!" A beat. "...who else will I have ice cream with?"

"What am I, chopped liver?" Lea's voice suddenly piped up, drawing our attention. Apparently all done toting our luggage up to our room, he now came striding in, mussing up both Xion's and Roxas's hair by way of hello as he passed them, "Look who got here early."

Roxas swatted his hand away, "No, you're just late."

Lea placed a palm on the back of the couch, catapulting himself over it to land heavily in the spot between me and Marshmallow. Slipping an arm around my shoulders, he declared, "The life of the party is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to."

"I'm sorry, why are you talking about Sora now?" Xion slyly teased.

"Yeah, he actually showed up on time unlike your late ass," Roxas sniggered before releasing a tiny, hissed "ow" when Lea delivered a swift kick to his shin.

Rolling his eyes, Lea sighed, "So what were you squirts talking about before I got here?"

Xion smirked over at her blond friend, "About how lost Rox would be if he didn't have me around to carry his lazy butt all the time. And we're talking completely lost. Bet he wouldn't even know who he was anymore."

He shrugged, "Psh, what are you talking about? I am me, nobody else."

"You're a chimp is what you are," she poked him in the cheek. "You're lucky you even know your own name, much less how to spell it. If it weren't for me, you'd of flunked outta college ages ago."

"Ooo, we're talking about college?" Anna chimed into the conversation as she came bustling back into the room precariously managing four mugs of hot cocoa, two in each hand. Kristoff was right behind her bearing a couple trays of Christmas cookies and pastries. One of the cocoas was sweetly delivered to me before the others were distributed and Anna sent Kristoff back to the kitchen to continue ferrying in more after he'd left the snacks on a coffee table. Happily flopping down into a nearby armchair, she popped one of the sweets into her mouth before continuing, "I can't believe I have less than a year before I graduate! Unlike some people…" Her eyes smugly drifted to Lea.

"Hey now, rude! Shit, why the drive-by? I'm working through my credits as fast as I can," he grumbled as he accepted one of the cocoas Kristoff had returned with and blew on it. Then one side of his mouth quirked up at he told Kristoff, "My my, she's got ya trained good, huh?"

His only response was a hand gesture that was less than PG. Lea just snorted at that.

"What are your plans after college? I don't think you've told me yet," I asked my sister, hazarding a slow careful sip. Mmmm, chocolate! I cradled it close in both hands, enjoying the warmth seeping into my fingers.

Anna grabbed a handful of holiday truffles, tossing one up in the air and catching it in her mouth with a huge grin before answering. "Thinking of going to work with dad at the company!"

I choked on the second sip I'd just been taking, coughing a bit. "R-really?"

I could picture Anna doing a lot of things. Some stuffy corporate politics job? Not so much.

"Don't act so surprised!" she laughed. "You know I've worked there every summer practically all my life! I like it, and I'm actually pretty good at it too! I think maybe I could run that place one day!"

"Ah, so good to see that the archaic practice of nepotism is still alive and well," Saïx dryly drawled, not looking up from his screen nor pausing in his typing.

My sister huffed, narrowing her eyes at him. "Shush, you! It wasn't handed to me, I've worked my sweet friggin' little butt off for this! Am still working my butt off, thank you very much! And I'll have you know one day when I'm handed the keys to the kingdom, there's going to be some changes around there! I think I could do some real good in the world once I'm in charge! So you can kindly shove it," she razzed her tongue at him before slipping three more sugary treats into her mouth with as much lofty dignity as anyone could do such a thing. It was actually rather impressive.

Saïx merely gave a low hmph at that, fingers still tapping away. Lea drooped his eyelids at him before shifting his leg over to nudge his brother's shoe with his Converse. "Oi. You seriously working right now, dude? C'mon, man, it's Christmas! Quit being such a scrooge, have a heart and let loose a lil!" As he spoke, I could feel his thumb idly tracing light circles in the hollow of my bare shoulder, probably missing having my braid to fiddle with.

"If I had a heart, this would be where I die of laughter," Saïx muttered, squinting at his screen with a thoughtful frown before pressing the backspace a couple times.

"Don't be silly, course you have a heart!" Roxas beamed and shrugged. "Small and shriveled, yes, but it's there!"

Xion rose, moving to instead take a seat on the armrest next to Saïx. "Yeah, you're not a scrooge, you're a grinch! We just need to give you some hugs and eggnog and that heart'll grow three sizes, you'll see!" she giggled, throwing her arms around his shoulders and squeezing hard.

"Ugh, will the intrusions never end?" Saïx huffed, trying to pry himself free of her vice-like embrace but to no avail.

"Shh, you know you love it!"

I had a growing suspicion Lea's interest in the current conversation had waned, for I could sense his intent gaze on me now as I bent forward to put my half drunk cocoa down on the coffee table and reach for the nearest snack tray. As I settled back more comfortably into my seat, he brought up a hand to tuck a stray wisp of my hair that had gotten free back behind my ear before ducking his head to trail feather light kisses down the slope of my neck that left little tingles in their wake. I turned my head to look at him through lowered lashes and he grinned, moving to close the distance between our lips and-

-I crammed a christmas cookie in his mouth.

Nice try, bucko, but you're not going to trick me up to the bedroom that easily.

"Ah! You two made it! Finally!" Rayne came into the room just then, toting Aria on her hip. "Yeesh, took ya long enough!" she smiled as I stood up and we hugged each other. Then she was offering me the baby with an abrupt, "Here, hold this."

I tensed, blinking a couple times, my hands twitching but making no other movements to accept the burbling infant from her. "I… er…"

"Here, I'll take her," Lea muffled out around the mouthful of cookie he was still choking down thanks to me, reaching up to pluck Aria from Rayne's hands and sitting her down in his lap.

I released a silent sigh of relief. Could you believe it had been weeks since the twins had been born and I had still yet to actually hold either one of them? Some godmother I was turning out to be. But dammit, babies were just so squishy and fragile! What if I accidentally broke one of them?

Uh-uh. No. Not on my watch.

Just keep the babies away from me and my klutzy hands. Really, it'd be in everyone's best interest.

"So, uh… have you finished getting their nursery all set up at long last?" I asked as I settled into my seat on the couch once more.

"Yes, finally!" Rayne grinned as she squeezed into Anna's armchair with her and my sister rested her head on her shoulder. "Since Cayde was an unexpected surprise, hadta do a lot of scrambling getting a second crib and other such things for him. Plus it took goddamn ages scrubbing and bleaching every last inch of your old room."

"Bleaching?" Lea echoed curiously, bouncing a laughing Aria on his knee. I couldn't help but notice however that his gaze had drifted to where the mistletoe hung, seemingly just now having noticed it. I could all but see the wheels turning behind those crafty green eyes of his.

My ex-roommate gave him a flat look. "Red, please. You used to spend the night over. A lot. No tykes of mine are gonna be playing somewhere you two used to do the frick-frack constantly without it being properly and thoroughly disinfected and sanitized first."

"Ah," was the only response he made to that. As Rayne then got momentarily distracted by her husband coming over to give her surprise smooches, Lea leaned closer to me, muttering low out of the corner of his mouth so only I could hear, "Take it we're not gonna tell her 'bout their living room couch then?"

Feeling heat creeping up the back of my neck, I cleared my throat and shook my head, answering a quick but just as quiet, "No."

"Or the kitchen countertops? Or that one time on the dining table? Or-"

"No. No, none of it," I hissed, face full on roasting now.

What can I say? Lea could be very, ahem… persuasive when it came to having his way.

"Oh!" Anna suddenly straightened up in her seat excitedly as it seemed she'd just remember something. "You auditioned for the Spring musical, right? Have they announced who got what parts yet?"

Grateful for the subject change, I eagerly nodded, "Yes, actually, they just posted the cast sheet yesterday afternoon." A surge of giddiness filled my chest as I bit back a grin. "...I got the lead."

"Wha- Seriously?! Oh my friggin' god! Sis! Congratulations! And you're only now telling me? You should have said something sooner, this is a big deal!"

Lea glanced up from blowing air raspberries for a happily squealing Aria to say, "That's what I kept trynta tell her."

"I'd hardly call community theater a big deal," I self-consciously brushed off, the pleased smile I was fighting growing wider despite myself. "...I am really excited about it though."

"And you should be, sweetpea!" Rayne reached for my hands in my lap, covering them with her own. "Community theater it may be, but the people there still know their shit! They've recognized your talent and are trusting you with more responsibility! Your first official lead! That's huge!"

"Today, community theater… tomorrow, Broadway… the day after that, the world," Lea intoned in a dramatic whisper.

I rolled my eyes with a small grin, "That's not exactly how it w-"

"Too late. Already said it. It's happening."

As I shook my head at him, Anna hopped up to her feet, struck a finger up in the air and declared, "This calls for celebration! Be right back with something to spike the cocoa with!" With that, she blurred out of the room back towards the kitchen.

I shyly accepted a few more congrats from everyone else before conversation gradually turned to other topics and I just contentedly listened for a bit. The chit chat began to fade into the background however as I glanced towards Lea.

Gosh, he was so good with Aria. How did he make it look so easy? Not to mention there was something so pure and comically endearing about seeing this absolute behemoth of a man with his mess of untamed red hair, guyliner, and black nail polish being so gentle as he played peek-a-boo with the tiny baby. I know I'd already thought he'd make an amazing father one day, but thinking it and actually seeing him in action were two completely different things. Watching the two of them right now-

Oh dear, it was doing things to me.

You know. Stomach butterflies, knees going weak, insides turning into mush kind of things.

Things that must have been as plain as day to read on my face for Lea happened to look over at me, blink a couple times, then quirk an eyebrow as his gaze flicked back and forth between me and Aria while he put two and two together. Then he smirked. Turning the infant to face me now, he took on a high-pitch, munchkin-like voice as he began guiding Aria's arms into flourishing gestures as if she were the one talking instead of him, "Come, m'dear, and let awesome, suave, studly Unkie Lea whisk you away to the bedroom to ravage you and introduce you to whole new worlds of pleasure."

I gave him a blank stare. "...are you seriously trying to seduce me with a baby right now?"

His grin turned toothy. "Depends. Is it working?"

Kind of.

Sort of.

Yes.

"No."

Liar.

Pretty sure he knew it too, what with the way he was squinting at me with that crooked little half-grin of his. His lips parted, but before he could utter another word, Anna practically bounced back into the room.

"We got Crème De Menthe," she held up a long, skinny green bottle in one hand, "we got Kahlúa," her other hand waggled a smaller brown bottle, "we got it all, take your pick! But first, I took a look out the window while I was in the kitchen and now I have a very important question for you." She set the booze down on the table, stood in front of me with both hands firmly planted on her hips and gave me her most serious expression as she stared down her nose at me. Abruptly, she broke out into an ear-to-ear smile, "Do you wanna build a snowman?"

"Hell yeah I do!" Sora finally tore his attention away from Cayde to enthusiastically shout across the room, causing Kairi to smother a snicker behind her hand.

"I'm in," Roxas was already on his feet and making his way towards where his warmer outerwear had been carelessly tossed onto some of the other furniture.

Xion was not too far behind him with a, "Me too! Bet my snowman will totally kick your snowman's frozen powdered ass!"

"Oh, it's on!"

Humming a small laugh, I nodded at Anna, "I'd love to."

Before I could rise from my seat however, I felt Lea's hand grabbing mine. "You sure about that, babe? You're not really, ya know…" his eyes briefly flicked down to indicate my clothes. More specifically, what was concealed beneath my clothes. "...dressed for cold weather and ya might catch a chill. So whaddya say we get you upstairs and-"

"Ah-ah," I pressed a fingertip to his lips, silencing him. "I'll be fine. You know the cold never bothered me anyway. I just need to snag a pair of gloves and go grab my coat from the foyer." I pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before standing.

I'd barely managed to take a step however before Lea'd hastily dumped Aria into Saïx's unsuspecting hands and charged past me to stand in my path, right smack dab beneath the-

"Hold it!" he held his palm up in my face, then smirked, propped one shoulder against the inside of the archway he occupied now and pointed up with a smug, "Mistletoe."

I narrowed my eyes at the little sprig above his head, then crossed my arms as my eyelids drooped. "And I suppose you're expecting a kiss now?"

"Tradition demands it and who are we to scoff in the face of tradition? 'Sides, you wanna get your coat, you'll have to get through me first. So pucker up, schmoopsie-poo, cuz these lips aren't gonna kiss themselves!" He stretched a hand towards me, adding a low, "C'mere."

I considered his awaiting hand for a moment. Then I met his gaze, one corner of my mouth quirking up before I snagged the nearest thing - or rather, nearest person, which just so happened to be Roxas as he was running by. "You heard the man: those lips aren't going to kiss themselves!" I winked at the blond before giving him a little push towards Lea.

"You ready, big guy, because here comes some sweet, sweet sugar!" Roxas cackled as he latched onto him and made kissy noises.

"Get off, ya twerp!" Lea growled, planting a hand on Roxas's face and trying to wriggle free of his stranglehold.

"But, dude!" he muffled back against his palm. "Tradition demands it and who are we to scoff in the face of tradition?"

"I believe it's now someone else's turn to hold the infant," I suddenly heard Saïx dryly announce and I glanced back towards him to see him looking quite unamused as he held Aria upside down by one ankle at arms length. She giggled in delight as she reached for Marshmallow, who obliged her with a curious snuffle of her fingers. As Rayne gasped and rushed to take her from him, I shook my head with a grin and quickly slipped past Lea while he was still busy trying to extract himself from Roxas's grapple and thus was unable to stop me.

And to think… the holiday shenanigans had only just begun.

"Welp, that's game!" Lea declared with a clap. Rising from the couch, he pulled me up with him and tried to drag me off as he hastily added, "Was fun guys, but we're gonna call it an early night. C'mon, El."

"What?" I laughed softly, digging my heels in and bringing us both to a lurching stop. "That was just the first round. We haven't even scored yet," I chided as I started leading him back towards the sofa.

He let me, huffing out a low sigh as he grumpily plopped back down into his seat and muttered under his breath, "Whaddya think I've been trying to do this whole time…"

I narrowed my eyes at him, pinching his arm for the comment.

"Oo, the foreplay's starting early, huh?" he waggled his eyebrows at me.

I pinched him harder.

"Babe, ya know you're only encouraging me at this point, right?"

I snorted, shifting tactics and shoving the notepad and pencil into his hands, "Just figure out the points please?"

"Fiiiiiine," he made an exaggerated show of rolling his eyes before scratching the pencil across the paper, tongue licking one corner of his lips as he worked. I shot the rest of the group a tiny apologetic smile.

It seemed Lea was getting a bit antsy for his gift.

I suppose he had been being rather patient for a while now. We had all spent several hours out in the snow - for the record, Xion's snowman had indeed kicked Roxas's snowman's frozen powdered butt. Lea had tried to corner me once or twice out there for some, hrm… snogging, but a well-timed handful of snow to his face did wonders for cooling that fiery passion of his down if only for a moment. Several snow angels and snowball fights later and we'd all finally had our fill and come back inside to warm ourselves by the fireplace once more. We were well past lunchtime now, but we still had plenty of snacks to tide us over until dinner. In the meantime, we'd decided to get a game of charades going at Anna's request.

At least, that's what we were attempting to do…

Of course, it'd help if the scorekeeper was actually doing his job correctly.

Or, you know… at all.

"Alright, lessee here…" Lea mumbled, pencil still furiously scribbling away. "You, my love, have four points, I have negative seventeen, and looks like Riku's won with… hm, carry the one… one million points. Now that's game! Shucks, too bad, so sad, let's go, El." Dropping the pad and pencil to the couch cushions, he snagged my hand and hopped up to his feet once more.

"Sit," came my simple yet firm command as I yanked him back down next to me. Pushing the pencil and notepad squarely into his chest, I told him, "Do it right."

As Lea released a sigh through his nose, Riku snorted from where he sat in another couch snuggled up close with his wife. "Do you even know the score? Have you been paying attention at all?"

"Course I know it! Got it memorized up here in the ol' noggin," he poked the pencil's eraser to his temple with a grin. However it quickly faded into a frown as he squinted down at the paper, tapping his writing utensil against it a couple times. "...but, I mean… if anyone else'd wanna compare notes and tell me what they think the point totals are, I'd only be too happy to let 'em know if they're right or wrong."

"But I thought you already knew the score, Mr Got-It-Memorized," Kairi sniggered, mockingly tapping a fingertip to the side of her forehead.

"I do. That was a test, and one ya just failed, princess. Minus fifty points for Kairi," Lea razzed his tongue at her as he wrote that down.

Sora groaned, "I want a new scorekeeper!"

"And that's minus one hundred points for you, bucko!"

Oh dear. We'd given the doofus way too much power.

"I'll take over keeping track of points," Rayne volunteered as she smiled and shook her head at my boyfriend's antics.

"Treason! Minus one thousand points for Raindrop for the villainy, attempted mutiny, and-"

I snatched the notepad from his fingers and smacked his shoulder with it before tossing it to Rayne who chirped a little "thank you!" at me as she caught it. I tried to confiscate the pencil as well, but he held it up high and away from me. As I stretched across him to reach for it, he took advantage of my new close proximity to plant a small peck to the tip of my nose.

I drooped my eyelids up at him.

Fine then. Keep the pencil, you big dork.

Anna piped up now, "Alright, we'll just call that first round a warm-up! Points start now!" She glanced over her shoulder and called out, "You're missing out on all the fun, Saïx, you sure you don't wanna join us?"

He'd moved some time ago to a table on the other side of the room far away from the rest of us, still hard at work on his laptop with Marshmallow curled up at his feet. "There's nothing I'd hate more," came his flat reply.

"So sayeth Mr Holly-Jolly himself," Lea muttered, staring up at the ceiling now as he balanced the pencil on his nose. I tried to swipe it, but he was faster in grabbing it off himself and once again keeping it out of my reach.

"Since we're starting off fresh, how about some new teams? Gals versus guys?" Xion suggested. She then bumped her shoulder into Roxas's with a goading smirk, "Unless, ya know, you're too scared of getting your asses handed to you by a buncha girls."

He snerked, bumping her back harder. "Bring it!"

As the others began weighing in as well on the new arrangement for the teams, I felt it. This tiny tickle against my thigh. I glanced down to discover Lea trying to use the eraser end of the pencil to covertly lift the side slit of my skirt for another discreet peek at the garter.

I lightly slapped his hand away and stood up, quickly saying, "You know, girls against boys sounds like an excellent idea. I think I'll go sit with my new teammates over here." I squeezed into the other couch between Anna and the armrest, edging Riku out from the opposite end and forcing him to find another seat. Across from Lea now, I shot him a pointed look with one eyebrow arched and a small smirk.

He just sulkily slumped further down into his own seat, knee jiggling up and down as he began gnawing on the pencil.

Oh yeah. Definitely antsy.

But no need to pout there, buddy, you and I both know you secretly love the torture of being forced to wait.

...was it wrong of me to actually be kind of enjoying this newfound power over him so much?

"Alright! Now that that's all settled, let the games begin!" Anna beamed before her blue gaze settled on me. "Sis, why don't you start us off?"

I stiffened. "Wha- me?" I bit down on my lower lip, eyes darting to the left as my hands began to fidget with each other in my lap. "...are you sure? Maybe it'd be better if someone else-"

"Elsa," she interrupted me, placing both hands on my shoulders. "Sis. I love you. You know I do. But you royally suck at charades."

"Hey!" I narrowed my eyes at her.

She shrugged, "Don't you 'hey' me, it's true!"

My face pinched sourly. "...okay, fair. But still… cheap shot."

An unapologetic grin pulled at her lips. "So now that we've got that established, don't you think getting the absolute travesty that will be your turn out of the way first so the rest of the team can help us finish strong might be the best call?"

I fixed her with a dull stare. "Gee, thanks for sugar coating it."

"No prob!" she giggled before her eyes turned expectant. "Sooo…?"

"Fine, just give me my word and let's get this over with," I relented with a sigh and held my hand out. Anna's face lit up and she offered me the basket full of tiny folded bits of paper. I plucked one up without much consideration and rose, stomping a few steps away.

We all remember what a "fan" of charades I am, right?

Not.

Ugh, the things I do for my sister.

Was it too late to be dragged off by Lea so he could have his manly way with me instead?

Releasing another sigh as I took my spot, I turned to face the others with a steely look of determination now. I'd show Anna. Time to put all those acting classes I'd been taking to good use! My team was going to guess my word so fast, they wouldn't even know what hit them. I was going to own this word. I was going to charade the hell out of this word! But first… alright, you stupid word, let's find out what you are. I opened the little slip of paper and squinted down at it.

…ice?

…

What the frick was I supposed to do with ice?!

"All set?" came the sound of Kristoff's voice and my head shot up, eyes wide and skin drained of color. Does this look like the face of someone who's 'all set'?! "Good! Timer starts in three…"

Wait.

"...two…"

No.

"...one…"

Stop!

"...GO!"

Fudge.

He flipped over the small plastic hourglass and I…

...just stood there like a deer caught in the headlights.

"You got this, Elsa!" Anna called out to me. Oh sure, thanks for the vote of confidence now. Too little, too late, Sis. "...any time." No really? And here I was just standing around doing nothing on purpose because I figured that's how you win. "Just… just do it with your body!" Gah, I'm trying!

Okay, think, Elsa, think! Ice… how do I get them to say ice… Ice, ice, ice… ice...berg? ...Icicle? ...ice, ice, baby? Oh come on, Elsa, stop being silly and focus! Ice…

...cube!

Ice cube! Yes, I think I could work with that!

I suddenly snapped into action, my hands blocking out a large shape in the air.

"Oh, oh, square!" Anna said excitedly.

Rayne tipped her head to one side, asking, "A rectangle?"

Kairi chimed in with, "A box!"

I twirled my index finger sideways, indicating for them to keep going before I began outlining the same shape again.

"Television box!"

"Lunch box!"

"Juke box!"

Gah, move on from the infernal word box already, people!

Xion squinted and gave a doubtful, "...microwave?"

"Crate!"

"Toaster!"

"Croaster!" Anna shouted, bouncing up and down in her seat before freezing with a frown. "Wait… that's not a word…"

Despairing and not knowing what else to do, I kept miming the same shape in the air, just more frantically now.

As if doing it faster would somehow help the situation.

"Cube!"

Oh wow, it actually had!

I clapped and nodded vigorously, hopping on the balls of my feet. Alright, onto phase two, which…

...there was no phase two.

Crud.

I had zero idea how to get them from cube to ice cube.

I did not think this through.

Alright. Forget cube. Cube was stupid. Cube is out the window. New plan!

...got it! Okay, no, this was good. They were going to get it for sure this time. It was so obvious, I should've thought of it sooner. When you think of ice, you think of…

...ice skating.

Smiling and sure of myself now, I spread my arms out wide to either side of me and balanced on one foot, like a skater gliding on one blade across a frozen pond.

"Oh, ah… ballerina!"

"Tightrope walker!"

"Er… a tree? Maybe?"

A tree? I looked down at myself. How was this a friggin' tree?!

I locked gazes with Anna and stretched my pose out further for emphasis. Her face was scrunched up in deep thought. Come on, Sis, help me out here. You've seen me ice skate before, you know what it looks like. You got this. Two sisters, one mind. Suddenly her face brightened and she jumped up to her feet. Ha, there it is! I knew she'd get i-

"Michael Jordan!" she yelled, stabbing a finger in my direction.

...nevermind.

Kairi abruptly rocketed up beside her, "Gandalf!"

Anna shook her head, "Pffft, like Gandalf Cube is a thing!"

"And what, like Michael Jordan Cube is?"

Oof, I really shot myself in the foot with that whole cube thing earlier, huh?

As the girls began to bicker amongst themselves while I continued to wobble and sway on one foot, I glanced over towards the boys who were all quietly snickering at our expense. Well, almost all of them. Lea instead seemed rather fascinated by the way I'd stretched and arched my body into its current pose, his eyes half-lidded as they travelled down my curves, his head slightly tilted and teeth still idly gnawing that pencil.

I smirked, a new idea forming inside my head. The girls needed more clues, after all. Planting both feet back on the ground, I bowed at the waist as if reaching down to tie the laces on my imaginary ice skates. As I bent forward, I made sure Lea got just enough of a glimpse down the front of my blouse to give him a hint of something lacy.

He bit the pencil in half with a loud crack!

Okay, I really was enjoying teasing him way too much now.

I think all this power was going straight to my head!

The all-corrupting power of the lingerie...

A gasp suddenly tore out of Anna and she started pointing back and forth between Lea and me, "I saw that! You two secretly communicated! You're working together! Double agent! Cheater!"

My head rocked back and I stammered, "Wha-?! I- How would that even- I am most certainly not-"

"Ahhnnnt!" Kristoff loudly and obnoxiously made a buzzer sound.

"Oh come on, I can't be out of time already!" I told him, crossing my arms.

"You talked, and there's no talking in charades, so consider yourself disqualified," he chuckled, then added, "PS: you actually ran out of time ages ago, we just let you keep going because watching you epically fail so hard was too funny."

Blowing out a tiny huff through my nostrils, I returned to my seat where the rest of the ladies gave me pats on the back and shoulder squeezes to console me. As Anna side-hugged me with one arm, she said, "There, there, Sis, I'm sure the word you got just sucked. Lemme see it," she took the little scrap of paper from me and unfurled it, read it, then blinked. "Ice?!" she snapped incredulously. "You couldn't get ice?!"

I sunk further down into my seat with a groan, pinching the bridge of my nose and making no further comment.

Surprisingly, the game ended in a draw. What I lacked in being able to communicate a concept without the use of words, I more than made up for in my ability to guess what my teammates were acting out. And while I may have been my team's handicap, turns out Lea was theirs. Normally he'd have been one of their stronger players, but it seemed his head just wasn't in the game. Not if the way his eyes kept distractedly drifting over to me while the rest of the boys had to constantly yell at him to focus was any sort of clue.

A couple hours and several rounds later brought us to a point where more than a few stomachs were suddenly loudly grumbling. We decided it was high time to break for dinner, seeing as how cookies and candy canes just weren't cutting it anymore. As everyone else started making their way towards the dining room, I excused myself so I could go freshen up real quick.

As I finished up in the bathroom, I turned the faucet off and flicked my hands a few times to shake away the water before reaching for the towel. Fingers now dried, I took a moment to eye myself in the mirror before straightening my bun and smoothing out my skirt. With a little satisfied nod, I turned, opened the door and-

-came to a screeching stop, looking up and blinking a couple times. "...can I help you?"

Lea smirked back down at me from where he stood in the threshold blocking my exit. Without uttering a word, he just smugly pointed up. My gaze followed his finger and-

Fudge.

Guess what we were both now under?

That's right. He'd moved the mistletoe.

My eyelids drooped at him. "Well now, that's just cheati- mmph!"

His warm lips were suddenly on mine as he grabbed my face in both hands. Unconsciously, my body leaned into his, my hands grasping at his shirt and wrinkling the material as he kissed me long and slow and we just stayed in the doorway there for a few heartbeats, his thumbs tenderly grazing along my cheekbones. Then there was a shift. His breathing turned ragged, his lips more urgent and demanding as a low growl emitted from his throat and Lea started backing me into the bathroom once more, kicking the door shut after him. Without breaking the kiss, he fumbled a hand behind him to lock it then was pushing me up against the sink counter. Lea wasted no time lifting me to sit on top of it, situating his hips between my knees as he hooked his hands beneath them and pulled me up against him roughly. He then wrapped my legs around his waist, fingertips caressing along the stockings, up my thighs and hiking my skirt a bit.

At last he broke the kiss, redirecting his attention to nibble down the side of my throat. Breathless and face hot, I whispered, "Lea, maybe we shouldn't-"

My neck suddenly seared in intense pleasure as his teeth bit down hard at just the right spot and I gasped.

...okay, maybe we should.

He huskily chuckled against my skin, lightly kissing it now as he murmured, "You were saying, Love?"

Desperately trying and failing to unscramble my brain, I began, "I… I was…"

"Mm-hm," he prompted absently as his lips and tongue continued to trail a path down my neck while his fingers pushed the hem of my skirt up a tad further.

"...was saying that… that we, uh…"

"Mm-hm," Lea hummed again, pulling back slightly now with a sly gleam in his crinkled eyes as he reached a hand back over his shoulder, grabbed the back of his tee, and-

Oh wow, there goes the shirt. On the floor. Just like that.

Should.

Lea had just made an extremely compelling argument for should.

I'd mentioned how persuasive he could be, right?

I dazedly watched as he took my hands in his, pressing my palms to his bare chest now as he leaned in to hungrily kiss me again. My fingers took on minds of their own as they began to drift and roam, slowly tracing down the lines and contours of his leanly muscled torso. I shivered as I felt his fingertips skim over the hollow of my shoulder and along my collarbone before settling on the top button of my blouse, tugging to undo it and moving down to the next-

"Elsa!" Several loud, frantic bangs against the door abruptly startled us apart. It took me a second to recognize Sora's voice coming from the other side as he whined, "Hurry up in there, I really, really gotta go!"

"Occupied!" Lea shouted over his shoulder before grinning as he hooked a finger under my chin and bent forward, his lips brushing mine once more.

"...Elsa? Why does your voice sound funny?" Sora asked uncertainly, causing me to snort against Lea's lips. His shoulders slumped and he hung his head, cursing under his breath. The spell had been broken. We both knew it.

I gently pushed him away, scooting myself down off the countertop and snatching his shirt up off the ground to hand to him. Then I took a second to fan myself in a futile effort to cool my face before opening the door and immediately saying, "This isn't what it looks like."

Sora blinked at me. Then his gaze darted to where Lea stood behind me, eyeing Sora sourly as he pulled his tee back on.

...okay, it was exactly what it looked like.

But Sora didn't need to know that!

He blinked again, "Um…"

Deciding to save him from having to come up with a more sophisticated response than that, I simply took Lea's hand in mine and left the bathroom towing him along after me, his dark scowl never leaving Sora as we pushed passed him and headed towards the dining room.

On the way there, we bumped into Rayne in the hallway who was bouncing Cayde in her arms in what seemed to be an attempt to get him to settle down. She arched an eyebrow at me as we drew near. "I thought you were freshening up."

My brow furrowed at her. "...I did."

She eyed me up and down, then snerked. "Sure ya did," was her only remark as she wiggled her eyebrows, shifted the baby to rest against her shoulder and disappeared through the door to join the others for dinner.

I tipped my head to one side, then glanced in a decorative mirror that was hanging on the wall to my left. To say I'd been disheveled would have been the understatement of the century. My skirt was rumpled, my blouse skewed, and I was still bright red from practically head to toe. To top it all off, my hair was free of its bun and positively wild.

"When did you do that?" I narrowed my eyes accusingly at Lea as I did my best to gather and throw it back up into a haphazard bun.

Alright fine, I knew exactly when he did it. I just hadn't even realized he'd done it.

He pursed his lips to one side, shoved his hands into his pockets and gave a tiny shrug as I finished righting my clothes. I then noticed his eyes flick down, suddenly seeming highly fascinated by something. I followed his gaze to spot my top button of my blouse still undone and flashing a scandalous little sneak preview of the lingerie. Blushing harder (the exact opposite of what I wanted to be doing right now, dammit, cheeks!), I hastily re-fastened the button while Lea grinned wolfishly. I pinched his arm, wiping the smirk off his face before taking his hand in mine once more and leading him into the room.

Everyone was seated at the long wooden dining table already and were all too busy laughing and talking over each other to pay much mind to our entrance. As I quietly took a seat, I noticed most of the dishes of piping hot food had already been brought out to the table. Kristoff was bringing out the last of them with my sister's help.

"I'm so happy my man knows how to cook," Anna delightedly chirped as she set down a bowl of yams before giggling and pressing a smooch to Kristoff's cheek. "That way, I don't have to!"

I smiled at the two of them while Lea plonked down into the chair beside me. He laced our fingers together, his thumb idly rubbing along my knuckles as he settled his other elbow onto the table, heavily propped his chin in his palm and heaved a long, drawn out sigh through his nose. His eyes narrowed on Sora as he returned from the restroom and happily crossed the room to take a seat between Riku and Kairi, totally oblivious to the daggers my boyfriend was glaring at him the whole way. Lea then looked away, petulantly huffing out a second grumbly sigh.

It seemed somebody was still a bit pouty over our little interlude in the bathroom being interrupted.

We couldn't have that now, could we? Not on Christmas! Let's see what we can do to perk his spirits a bit.

I shifted ever so slightly in my seat, casually bumping my knee into his as if it were by accident. Lea glanced over at me, quirking an eyebrow. One corner of my lips turned up as I took our still intertwined hands and moved them under the table, releasing his so it could settle on my knee instead. He sat up a little straighter in his chair, his other eyebrow rising to join the first. I grinned coyly, averted my gaze and said nothing, merely waiting for him to take the hint as I reached for the cup of hot cider already waiting for me next to my plate.

Slowly, tentatively, his hand started to slide up my leg, brushing my skirt up with it as he went until he reached the garter. There he paused, his fingertips exploring, grazing over its soft delicate embroidery and toying with it. I could see Lea's face heating as he brought his other hand up to bite down on the knuckle of his curled finger. I just sipped my drink and smiled politely at the conversation the others were carrying on around us. The perfect picture of prim and properness. As if nothing even remotely untoward were happening under the table in the slightest.

Eventually, his hand began tracing the garter down to my inner thigh, discovering where one of the straps connected to it. His fingertips trailed circles over the clasp a couple times before then attempting to follow the strap further up between my legs.

That's when I snagged his wrist, stopping it dead in its tracks and shooting him a flat look.

Sorry, bucko, but that's as far as this little adventure at the dinner table goes.

His muscles were tense. His left eye twitched. But then Lea closed his eyes, released a low, shaky breath and his posture relaxed somewhat as with what appeared to be a considerable amount of visible effort, he willed himself to take his hand back.

"So hey!" Kairi suddenly piped up over everyone else, causing the chatter to die down a bit as all eyes turned towards her. "I brought a buncha Christmas movies with me! You know, all the classics. I was thinking maybe it could be fun for all of us to watch a couple after we finish eating. How does that sound?"

Lea cleared his throat, raking his fingers through his hair as he began, "Actually, El and I had other-"

"What a wonderful idea!" I chimed in brightly before turning to plant a swift peck to the corner of Lea's jawline. "We'd love to, isn't that right, Lea? Since we all know what a fan of the classics you are."

He pressed his lips together into a thin line and simply fixed me with a dull stare.

Oh yes.

No doubt about it.

I was definitely having way, way too much fun teasing him.

It was late. Little Ralphie Parker's father had just thrown aside fistfuls upon fistfuls of packing to liberate the infamous leg lamp from its crate in the movie. A quick glance around the dim room, lit only by the soft glow from the TV screen, revealed everyone to be cozied up together in one way or another as they enjoyed the film.

Rayne was curled up with Riku under a blanket, him turning his head to press an affectionate kiss to the top of her head. Sora was using Kairi's lap as a makeshift pillow, their hands joined and resting atop his chest as they watched. Anna was occupying an armchair with Kristoff seated on the floor before her, using her knees as a backrest while her nimble fingers plaited hundreds of thin, tiny braids into his short blonde hair. Roxas and Xion were taking their turn for some snuggle time with the twins who, even though it was now well past their bedtimes, were being quite obstinate about going to sleep.

Even Saïx had a cuddle buddy, although he was too busy snoring to realize it. It seemed being up during the daylight hours to power through getting all his work done had finally caught up to and taken its toll on him. Back on the couch once more, his laptop lay forgotten on his lap with the screensaver running while he'd conked out nestled into Marshmallow's plush fur beside him. Marshmallow's tail thumped quietly against the couch cushions as he too began to drift off into dreams.

Grinning, I returned my gaze to the movie and settled more comfortably into Lea's side as I laid my head against his chest once again and my arms hugged more tightly around his waist. I could feel him fiddling with a stray lock of my bangs that'd gotten loose, looping and twiddling it between his fingers. Then his hand diverted its attention to instead trail lightly along my bare shoulder, his fingertips drawing invisible patterns there against my skin. It tickled and I involuntarily squirmed against him a bit.

I heard him suck in a soft hiss of breath, shifting in his seat as he hastily removed his hand, fingers splaying and flexing before closing into a fist that he planted firmly on the sofa backrest behind my head now. His knee started furiously jerking up and down. I turned my head to look up at him. His whole body was rigid and his jaw set tight, the very fires of determination seemingly burning in his eyes currently as he focused hard on the movie (perhaps a little too hard), though his gaze kept flicking to the clock hanging on the wall every few seconds.

Frowning, I brought a hand up, brushing my knuckles tenderly over his cheek. Lea stiffened, his whole body suddenly going very still. I altered course to stroke his hair, gently running my fingers through it. His breath hitched as his eyes slowly closed and I could feel him quivering slightly. Then he abruptly snatched my hand, disentangling it from his mess of untamed hair.

I blinked at him.

He pressed a lingering kiss to the back of my hand before settling it on his knee as he ducked his head, bringing his lips right next to my ear as he half whispered, half growled, "Love, it's taking every last ounce of restraint I have not to just throw you on the coffee table and take you in a primal cavemanly fashion, so unless you want to give our friends a bit of a show, I suggest you stop."

...oh dear.

It seemed I'd made him wait a little too long and he was dangerously close to his breaking point.

Thus I decided to finally and at long last take pity on him.

It was time.

Time to let him unwrap his gift.

I stood up, spinning on my heel to face Lea. He stared up at my quizzically, probably leery of getting his hopes up at this point. Smiling sweetly, I reached down, taking his hands in mine and pulling him up to his feet as well as I announced to the rest of the room, "If you'll excuse us, Lea's not feeling too hot, so we're going to head to bed now." His hand still in mine, I led him out of the room and towards the stairs as the others called out a chorus of feel-betters and goodnights after us.

Reaching the second floor, I stepped through our door ahead of him and cast a brief glance about as I stood in the center of the bedroom, taking it in. The traditional rustic wooden walls decorated with a couple small pieces of hanging art here and there. The pair of plump armchairs in one corner next to a homey little fireplace, currently unlit and cold but with plenty of logs just waiting for a spark. The antique wardrobe and dresser off to one side, the door off to another leading into the adjoining private bathroom. The king-sized bed stacked high with blankets and quilts for fighting off the chill later on in the dead of night.

The muted click of Lea shutting the door behind us caught my attention, but I didn't turn to look at him, merely waited. There was a pause. One that was so long and quiet, I almost began to wonder if he'd left for some reason. But then I could all but feel him standing behind me, feel the warmth practically radiating off his body just a few short inches away from mine, sending a tiny chill up my spine and a small flutter through my chest.

His hands found their way to my hair, a simple tug pulling the bun free once more and sending my platinum locks cascading down my back. I shook it out a little more, resisting the urge to shiver at the pleasant tingling sensation brought on by him slowly, almost reverently combing his fingers through the strands. Then his fingertips were trailing along my shoulders and ghosting lightly down my arms where they came to settle comfortably on my hips. I could feel him nestling his face into my hair, pressing a kiss into it as he inhaled deeply, humming low in pleasure as his grip on my hips tightened and his body pressed more firmly up against my back.

At the gentle insistence of his hands, I turned and faced him now. Gosh, he was so tall. You'd think I'd be used to it by now, but I wasn't. It was moments like these - moments where no words were spoken and there was so little space between us - that reminded me just how tall he truly was. Not to mention how handsome he was or painfully gorgeous those startlingly green eyes of his were, especially while they were hooded and swirling as darkly as they were now. My pulse couldn't help but pick up the tempo beneath his heated gaze.

The air felt charged between us, nearly unbearably so. I was almost surprised Lea hadn't simply pounced the second we were alone. The slight tremble to his hand as he brought it up to stroke my cheek suggested that might be exactly what he wanted to do but was holding himself back. Perhaps he was going slow because he was wary of this moment being snatched away from him yet again like they all had been so far today. Perhaps he simply wanted to take his time and savor this. Whatever the case may be, as his fingers tangled themselves in my hair and he leaned in now, there was no doubt in my mind all that was about to change. I knew the second his lips met mine, all bets would be off. That last shred of restraint he was barely clinging on to would snap and all that pent up frustration he'd been keeping in check all day would be unleashed and given free rein. My face burned and my heart hammered as he closed the distance, so near now that I could feel his breath warming my lips as he murmured my name and-

"TOOTHPASTE!" I suddenly blurted out loudly.

He jerked back, eyes wide and both eyebrows skyrocketing as if to ask, Um… sorry, who what now?

Which honestly? Couldn't blame him.

So, mouth? Care to explain yourself?

I stammered nonsensically for a bit, wringing my hands together before finally pointing a thumb over my shoulder towards the restroom and managing to get out, "For brush teeth… make m-mint fresh in mouth."

Ah yes, clear as mud now. Thanks, mouth. Your gift for gab never ceases to amaze and astound.

My oh so eloquent words hung in the air between us as we just stared at each other for a few seconds. Then I bolted into the bathroom, slamming the door shut and locking it behind me. Pressing my back to it, I buried my face in my hands and slid down to sit on the floor.

Smooth going there, little Miss Casanova. Just really know how to set the mood, huh?

I groaned and banged the back of my head against the door.

Oh god, Lea was going to think I freaked out because of him. That I didn't want to, hrm… be intimate with him. But I did! I loved being intimate with him! It was something he was very good at! Very, very good! Amazing, in fact! But what did I go and do the second I had a chance to do exactly that with him?

I'd panicked and choked, that's what!

Because this time was different.

This time, lingerie was involved.

Putting it on and teasing him with it was one thing. But lingerie had implications. It set expectations. You were supposed to, I don't know… act sexy… be sexy… you know, that whole feminine wiles things! And my feminine wiles? Still a work in progress. Sure, it was something I'd gotten better at since Lea and I had started dating, but trust me, I still had a long way to go. And yet here I'd gone, riling him up all day and now that the moment had finally arrived where I had to deliver the goods, I'd…

I'd gotten a bit of stage fright, okay?! So sue me!

...maybe I was just being silly. Overthinking all of this. Putting too much pressure on myself for no reason. This was Lea we were talking about here, after all. I could go out there and do the least attractive impression of a sloth in a negligee doing the chicken dance while yodeling and he'd still probably find it sexy. (...dear lord, the fool honestly might. Not even joking anymore.) The point was that he loved me and I loved him, so this shouldn't be such a big deal. One teeny bit of silky, lacy fabric shouldn't be a big deal. Yeah, this was supposed to be fun.

So, missy, you march your little hiney back out there and have fun, dammit!

Nostrils flaring, I pressed a hand to the door behind me and pushed myself up onto my feet once more, turning to look at myself in the mirror. My reflection had fists balled at her hips, her shoulders squared, her head held high, and a look of ironclad resolve flashing in her blue eyes. I leaned forward, planting one hand on the sink countertop and using the other to jab a finger up against the mirror surface as I hissed, "Now listen up and listen good, me! You're going to go out there and… and… knock his friggin' socks off!"

She blinked back at me, visibly gulping with a tiny frown.

My shoulders sagged. "...I think."

Atta girl, that's the fire and can-do attitude we like to hear!

Face hardening once more, I gave myself a firm nod, straightened up and gingerly began unbuttoning my blouse. Once I'd shed it and tossed it to the floor, I slipped out of my skirt as well. Then I stood in front of the mirror inspecting myself, cheeks surely roasting hotter than the fires of Mount Doom. My lips pursed to one side. I awkwardly settled a hand against my right hip. Then I swept my hair forward over one shoulder. Only to brush it back again a second later.

Couldn't decide which way had a more 'come hither' look to it.

Narrowing my eyes, I whisked it forward again.

Then back.

Forward.

Back.

Fo-

Ugh, forget it and move on already!

Just then, I remembered something. Hesitantly, I turned my head, my eyes drifting almost unbidden towards our suitcases cluttered together in one corner of the spacious bathroom. Not really sure why Lea had put them in here when he'd dropped them off earlier. Maybe I'd asked him to and it'd simply slipped my mind. Maybe he'd just been looking for a place to stow them where they'd be out of our way in anticipation of tonight's activities.

Whatever the case may be, they were in here with me now. And that meant…

Inhaling and exhaling slowly, I approached them, locating mine and unzipping it. Flipping the lid open, I stared inside and paused in a moment of indecision. Then I grit my teeth and plunged my hand in, digging down deep past my clothes in search of the thing.

You know.

That thing.

The one Anna had made me buy.

I felt my fingers bump into it and I closed them around it, holding my breath before pulling it out. Then I stared down at what I now held in my hand.

A riding crop.

You read that right.

A friggin' riding crop.

Did I have the first clue what to do with it?

Not really, no.

Was I going to bring it out with me anyway?

...sure, why not?

I mean, I was already a bit of a nervous wreck over this whole ordeal, so it was hard to imagine this could make it any worse.

Go big or go home, as they say.

Heart pounding in my ears and insides twisting into a billion, quadrillion knots, I turned to face the door, chin hitched and back straight.

Slinky lingerie? Check. Riding crop? Check… apparently.

Operation Sexy Time was a go.

Let's do this.

I bravely charged forth.

And by that, I mean I opened the door just enough to cautiously poke my head out for a peek.

But I bravely poked my head out cautiously, dammit!

I spotted Lea dejectedly lying on the bed now, sprawled out on his back and smothering his face with a pillow. Heh… off to a good start here. Opening the door wider, I quietly crept a few steps into the room. With how high my blush had cranked up to at this point, it was a wonder I hadn't burnt to a crisp already. My empty hand stiffly found its way to my hip once more. I swept my hair forward again. Then grimaced, pushing it back. Then forw-

Gah, quit fussing, you stupid hands, and just get on with it already!

As Lea still seemed unaware of my presence and with me at a loss for how else to get his attention, I anxiously cleared my throat.

He didn't budge, just groaned into the pillow and muffled out, "What new way have you come to torment me with now, devil woman?"

Such a drama queen. Shaking my head, I began, "Lea-"

"Is there even really lingerie under there or is that just more of your cruel, twisted mind games to string me along and torture me?"

I rolled my eyes with a tiny huff of a snort and tried again, "Lea."

Face still under the pillow, he struck a defiant finger up high into the air, "Well not this guy! Nu-uh, no siree bob! I am done dancing to your sadistic whims! Begone, devious succubus, and tempt me no more with your-"

"Lea!" I snapped exasperatedly, unconsciously smacking my crop against my leg.

Oof, that'd stung a bit.

But it seemed to be what finally caught his attention. He hooked a thumb beneath his pillow now, lazily hoisting it up just enough for him to lift his head and look at me. Then he bolted up into a sitting position, back ramrod straight and eyes all but popping out of his head as the pillow tumbled to the mattress behind him. His wide-eyed gaze met mine. Then darted down to the lingerie. Over to the riding crop in my hand. Then he was madly scrambling to the foot of the bed, sitting on his knees there with his hands gripping the edge of the bedframe hard enough to turn his knuckles white as he heavily and rapidly breathed through his nose.

I just stood there, flushing more furiously and resisting the urge to self-consciously shift my weight from one foot to the other.

OhgodwhatdoIdowhatdoIdowhatdoIdowhatdowhatdoIdowhatdoI-

In a state of mild panic, I abruptly thrust the crop towards him and blurted out, "Shirt. Off."

...sure, that works.

Not missing a beat and faster than should have been humanly possible, Lea yanked his top up over his head and chucked it across the room. Then his eyes fastened on me once more, seemingly eagerly awaiting my next instruction.

Uh…

Nowwhatnowwhatnowwhatnowwhatnowwhatnow-

"Knees," I pointed at a spot on the floor in front of me, "Now."

In his haste to comply, he stumbled and fell out of the bed, crashing into the floor but was quick to recover and prop himself up on his knees before me.

Fudgewhatnextwhatnextwhatnextwhat-

Swat your thigh with the thingie again!

...I'm sorry, brain, do what now?

Well, I mean… it seemed to be highly well received just a second ago, so…

Pulse racing, I hesitated for a split second before piercing the air with another sharp thwack of the riding crop hitting my skin. His muscles visibly grew taut and tense, but he stayed put, his throat emitting an impatient whimper.

...was it really this easy?

...this actually was kind of fun…

Feeling some of the nervous tension start to ebb from my body, I slowly began to circle him now, lightly tapping the lash of the crop into the palm of my other hand as I murmured, "Now… what, oh what am I going to do with you?"

Lea released a deep, throaty chuckle. "...I might be able to think of a thing or two…"

Coming to a stop in front of him once again, I bowed down to his eye level, using the riding crop to lift his chin as I grinned at him. "I'm listening."

For the record, zero sleep was had that Christmas night.

The lingerie did not survive Lea's ravenous onslaught.

We may have also slightly broken that antique dresser.

Oops. Guess they just don't make those things as sturdy as they used to.

Author's Note: HAPPY NEW YEAR! And based on this chapter, have another (belated) merry Christmas xD Figures that my longest chapter to date had to be the friggin' lingerie chapter xD I am almost ashamed of myself… BUT NOT REALLY! No regrets, yolo! Lol, I hope you all had as much fun reading this as I had fun writing it :D

Fun Fact: This was actually the first bonus chapter idea I came up with for this story. It came to me about a year ago while I was still working on chapter… 17 I think? I wanted to immediately start writing it, but I restrained myself, wanting to finish the main story first. But having a whole year with this one-shot in the back of my mind is probably why it ended up being so long, cuz I kept coming up with more little ideas to squeeze into it xD Then of course, I started coming up with the ideas for the other bonus chapters that came before it, forcing myself to wait even longer to write it but aaahhhhhh, yay, I finally got to this one! And did I include Esmeralda's Secrets all the way back in chapter 19 specifically with this bonus chapter in mind? Yes, yes I did x'D Of course, I knew this whole time Esmeralda herself was gonna be making an appearance, but Frollo turned out to be a last minute addition that came to me as I was writing the chapter. But including him made me realize I had a missed opportunity: on one of Lea's and Elsa's many visits to the mall's clock tower which has BELLS, they should've bumped into a certain hunchback who's in charge of maintaining said bells xD Ah well, even tho they never saw him in the story, I've made it canon now: that is officially Quasimodo's job in this AU xD And he's always embarrassed about his adoptive father protesting with his picket signs outside the store of the cute girl he has a crush on xD Poor guy!

So many lines I snagged from the video games and the movies as references this chapter, I wonder if you guys were able to catch every single little one I slipped in? xD And obviously Elsa's fave musical that's playing at Broadway is Frozen 2 (since that's where Show Yourself that she sang back in auditions was from) but I didn't want to CALL it that in the story, but had zero ideas for a clever replacement title, so it didn't get a name xD And while I gave a few details here and there, for the most part I left the lingerie Elsa purchased vague on purpose - I figure some things are just best left to the imagination ;P Lea doesn't usually have such a one track mind as he did this chapter… or maybe he does and he's just usually more tactful about concealing it xD Either way, Lea ALSO isn't usually presented with the possibility of his very hot girlfriend dressing up in sexy lingerie for him, so can ya really blame the guy for being a bit of a horndog this chapter? I think not xP Worry not however, he'll be back to his normal, (slightly) more classy self next chapter xD You can bet tho that now that he knows Elsa has been to the dirty store in the mall, that he has since dragged her back there on more than one occasion now so they could make a few purchases as a couple, hehehe :3 But like I said all the way back at the very beginning, despite the main subject of the chapter, it was still all fairly tame, right? I haven't yet crossed THAT particular line… I may come right up to the line, dance wildly and with reckless abandon on top of the line, but not cross it xD I dunno if I'll ever be brave enough to write a full-on lemon, but maybe one day…. Hehehehe…

Anyhoo, tis with a sad and heavy heart that I must announce that this will probably be my last update for a while. Don't worry, there's more to come! I still have at least 3 more bonus chapters for this story planned! However, I've been working on almost nothing but this story for over a year now and I've finally hit a point where I need a break xD I think I'm gonna take a few weeks and have a breather from writing in general, but trust me, that won't last for long before the itch takes hold of me once again and I'll NEED to scratch it! When that happens, I'm not sure what I'm gonna work on next - it'll be Axelsa, without question, that's just my brand yo, it has bewitched my very SOUL xD But WHICH Axelsa story is the question! Will I update one of my older incomplete stories over on FFN/AO3 or will I get back to work on that new story I have the first 3 chapters written of that I've yet to share with you all? Guess we'll seeeeeeeeeeee xD I might eventually start posting some of my older stories here on tumblr too - they’re all incomplete currently tho and I was hoping to finish them before I started sharing them here, but I might not be able to resist in the end. I have commissioned a couple artists recently, so hopefully you’ll be seeing those soon! I’ll have more of my own personal fanart to share too in the hopefully near future, I just need to wait for my hand to recover as I sprained it being the irresponsible dope that I am and have had to put my doodling on hold while it recuperates xD All of that is to say, you’ll be hearing from me and my Axelsa obsession again in some form or another in the near future, you can count on it!

Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you who’ve liked, reblogged, and followed so far, seeing those lil notifications always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

[patioclus]

alright, fantasy book recs (and sorry if you've read any of these!!): six of crows, wicked saints, there will come a darkness, the kingdom of back and ashlords

sci fi recs: illuminae, white space/the dickens mirror (duology), once and future and jane unlimited

darker fantasy: to kill a kingdom, stepsister, the darkest part of the forest and the never tilting world

historical fiction: salt to the sea, mrs. everything, all the light we cannot see, lovely war, lady rogue and the nightingale

must-reads: i'll give you the sun, rayne and delilah's midnite matinee, circe, red white and royal blue, tiny pretty things, hello girls, hot dog girl, the opposite of always, let's call it a doomsday, jellicoe road, aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe, dare me and the past and other things that should stay buried (that last thing is one title!!)

wow! thank you so, so much for taking the time to send all these! I have read and loved a couple of these, but i’m definitely adding the rest to my tbr!!

send me book recs!

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

Robert Lacey is married to one of the Queen's train bearers at her Coronation, Lady Jane Rayne. She is also Annabel Goldsmith's sister so he might not have it straight from the horse's mouth but he won't be far off.

Thanks!

[askauradonprep]

Wrestling Inspiration

As part of the wrestling AU, @scream-qween and I were talking about the different kids and wrestlers who could have served as inspiration for them. Let’s pretend for a second the WWE exists in this universe. Other wrestler suggestions are welcome, I’m just picking ones I’m familiar with (and I’m relatively new to wrestling - I’ve only watched for two years and only watched WWE).

Note: I am referring to the wrestlers as in their kayfabe personas. Any mention of them here should not be read as an endorsement of anything they may have said or done elsewhere. 

Mal = Paige, Sonya Deville, Mandy Rose, Undertaker, Kane, Ruby Riott, Sarah Logan, Liv Morgan, Jody Threat, Molly McCoy, Maria Manic, Tamina and Nia Jax (as a heel). 

Uma = Kairi Sane, Io Shirai, Becky Lynch, Roman Reigns, Drew McIntyre, Sasha Banks, Creatures of the Deep, Trish Stratus, Jordynne Grace, The Sea Stars, Chyna, Rhea Ripley, Shotzi Blackheart, Lita, Allie, Kofi Kingston, Nia Jax, Beth Phoenix, Randy Orton, Seth Rollins, Bianca Belair, and Ronda Rousey.

Freddie = Undertaker, Kane, Cameron, Carmella, Damian Priestly, Bray Wyatt, Ember Moon, AJ Lee, Paige, New Age Outlaws, Hawlee Cromwell, Elias, Sanity, Su Yung, Nikki Roxx, Aliyah, and Ruby Riott.

Celia = Undertaker, Bray Wyatt, New Age Outlaws, Ember Moon, Tamina, Aleister Black, Sting, Solo Darling, Nikki Roxx, Willow Nightingale, and Vivian St. John

Jay = Baron Corbin, Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Miz, Natalya, Seth Rollins, Becky Lynch, Dean Ambrose, Imperium, British Strong Style, Pete Dunne, Goldberg, Ember Moon, Big Show, Jericho, Bret Hart, Bullet Club, Kurt Angle, Rey Mysterio, Alex Zayne, Roman Reigns, Warhorse, The Rock, and the Undertaker

Evie = Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Alexa Bliss, Sasha Banks, Cameron, Mandy Rose, Naomi (especially as a face), Scarlette Bordeaux, Velveteen Dream, Laynie Luck, Breezango, Kylie Rae, and Bayley (especially at the height of her ‘hugger’ days), Charlotte Flair and Ric Flair.

Carlos = Carmella, R-Truth, the Usos, New Day, Shield (as faces), Mark Henry, Big Show, Heath Slater, Undisputed Era, Jordynne Grace, Alex Ohlson, IFHY, Lana, Marko and Logan Stunt, No Way Jose, Lucha House Party, Xyberhawx 2000, and Naomi.

Harry = Nikki Cross, Drew McIntyre, Aleister Black, AJ Lee, Bray Wyatt, Kane, Kairi Sane, Shayna Baszler, Space Pirates, Becky Lynch, Jon Moxley, Jordynne Grace, The Sea Stars, Creatures of the Deep, Damian Priestly, Ember Moon, Randy Orton, Shawn Michaels, Mick Moretti, The Carnies, Undertaker, and Finn Balor (as the demon).

Gil = Brock Lesnar, Braun Strowman, Bobby Lashley, Randy Orton, Drew McIntyre, New Day, Heavy Machinery, Space Pirates, the Viking Raiders, Oleg the Usurper, Creatures of the Deep, Warhorse, Mark Henry, Kane, Big Show, and Kairi Sane.

Ben = John Cena, Kurt Angle, Bruno Sanmartino, Bret Hart, Finn Balor, Diamond Dallas Page, Bayley, Naomi, Natalya, Boomer Hatfield, Levi Everett, Dynamite Dino Dude, and Roman Reigns (especially after he came back from leukaemia).

Chad = Baron Corbin, Randy Orton, Carmella (as a heel), the Miz (as a heel), the Shield (as heels), Kane, Sasha Banks (as a heel), Shane McMahon, Stephanie McMahon, Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Vince McMahon, Darin Corbin, GPA, Breezango, and the Usos. 

Lonnie = Asuka’s NXT heel run, Xia Li, Becky Lynch (especially as ‘the Man’), Sonya Deville, Gail Kim, Bianca Belair, Minerva, Velveteen Dream, Johnny Gargano, Jason Jordan, The Bar, Titus O’Neil Rhea Ripley, Shayna Baszler, Tamina, Lacey Lane, Mia Yim, and Natalya. 

Jane = Bayley, Asuka (as a face), Candice LeRae, Dakota Kai, Bobby Roode, Sara Del Ray, Summer Rae, Willow Nightingale, Solo Darling, Jordynne Grace, and Charlotte Flair

Audrey = SASHA BANKS, Charlotte Flair, Bianca Belair, the Rock, AJ Lee (as a heel), Alexa Bliss, Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Mercedes Martinez, Velveteen Dream, Renee Michelle, Roman Reigns, Princess Kimberlee, Mickie James, Lacey Evans and Tamina.

Jordan = Sasha Banks, Carmella, R-Truth, Cameron, Miz, Maryse, Nikki Bella, Nia Jax, Becky Lynch, Natalya, CM Punk, Roddy Piper, Tegan Nox, Santana Garrett, Kacy Catanzaro, D-Generation-X, Molly Holly, LuFisto, Lacey Lane, Ronda Rousey.

Ally = Harley Wonderland, Nikki Cross, Allison Wonderland, Alexa Bliss, Maria Kanellis, Rhea Ripley, Lita, Elias, Heavy Machinery, EFFY, AJ Lee, Bayley, and Lacey Evans, Nina Samuels, Jinny.

CJ = Kairi Sane and Io Shirai are all she cares about.

Aziz = Ricochet, Ali, AJ Styles (as a face), B-Team, Bayley, Dolph Ziggler, Jinder Mahal, Finn Balor, Kurt Angle, Dana Brooke, the New Day, Jordan Devlin, Sonny Daze, Goldust.

Herkie = Shinsuke Nakamura, Rusev, Kevin Owens, Brock Lesnar, Mark Henry, Samoa Joe, Bobby Lashley, Becky Lynch, Titus O’Neil, Shelton Benjamin, Kurt Angle, Mandy Rose, and Punishment Martinez.

Maddy = AJ Lee, Aksana, Ember Moon, CM Punk, Paige, Emma, Lita, Charlotte Flair, Rosa Mendes, Victoria, The Beautiful People, Ric Flair, The Ascension, Laycool, and Alexa Bliss, Jinny, Reina Gonzalez.

Ginny = Alexa Bliss, Alicia Fox, Candice LeRae, Mandy Rose, Charlotte Flair, Maryse, Zelina Vega, Lana, Randy Savage, Maria Kanellis, Dolph Ziggler, Laycool, The Iiconics, Candy Floss, Carmella.

Harriet = Kairi Sane, Io Shirai, Mia Yim, Shane Saber, Shelly Martinez, Shayna Baszler, Paul and Katie Lea Burchill, Rhea Ripley, Batista, Kay Lee Ray, Jazzy Gabert, Natalya, Becky Lynch, and Toni Storm.

Ruby = Bayley, Bobby Roode, Dolph Ziggler, Naomi, New Day, Candice LeRae, Dakota Kai, Lucha House Party, Rey Mysterio, Bianca Belair, Jericho, No Way Jose, Dana Brooke, Xia Brookside, Carmella and R-Truth, Humberto Carrillo, Jurassic Express, Cain Velasquez, Andrade, Sin Cara, Zelina Vega, Sarah Stock, Catalina Garcia.

Anxelin = Baron Corbin, Alexa Bliss, Carmella, Charlotte Flair, Ember Moon, Sasha Banks, Paige, Eddie Guerrero, Apollo Crews, Cedric Alexander, Dana Brooke, Titus O’Neil, Shelton Benjamin.

Yi-Min = She’s mostly seen Chinese wrestling promotions, so Black Mamba, Ho Ho Lun, King of Man, Ash Silva, Slam, Hangwan, Voodoo, Candy Brother, Dalton Bragg, and Jason New are her inspirations from those promotions. She’s got a few wrestlers whose careers she follows in English though - Xia Li, Karen Q, Lin Byron, Kenny Li, Rocky, and Big Boa.

Arabella = Daniel Bryan, Rowan, Brie Bella, Asuka, Rusev, Lana, Natalya, Alexa Bliss, Braun Strowman, Becky Lynch, Sami Zayn, Sasha Banks, Finn Balor, Apollo Crews, The Miz, Mandy Rose, Goldust, Elias, Bayley, Bobby Roode, Charlotte Flair, Jimmy Uso, Naomi, Shinsuke Nakamura, Big E, Carmella, Ember Moon, Mickie James, Bobby Lashley, Jinder Mahal, Alicia Fox, Kevin Owens, AJ Styles, Jeff Hardy, R-Truth, and Nia Jax.

Jade = Aliyah, Jayme Hachey, Bianca Belair, Vanessa Borne, Abbey Laith, Ayesha Raymond, Candice LeRae, Dakota Kai, Jazzy Gabert, Kairi Sane, Kavita Devi, Kay Lee Ray, Lacey Evans, Marti Belle, Mercedes Martinez, Mia Yim, Miranda Salinas, Nicole Savoy, Piper Niven, Princesa Sugehit, Rachel Evers, Reina Gonzalez, Renee Michelle, Rhea Ripley, Sage Beckett, Santana Garrett, Sarah Logan, Serena Deeb, Shayna Baszler, Taynara Conti, Tessa Blanchard, Toni Storm, Xia Li, Zeda, Tegan Nox, Barbi Hayden, Deonna Purrazzo, Jessica James, Lei’D Tapa, Nicole Matthews, Alundra Blayze, Lita, Triple H, Corey Graves, Aerial Monroe, Allysin Kay, Ashley Rayne, Hiroyo Matsumoto, Io Shirai, Isla Dawn, Jessica Elaban, Jinny, Kacy Catanzaro, Kaitlyn, Karen Q, Killer Kelly, Lacey Lane, Meiko Satomura, MJ Jenkins, Priscilla Kelly, Vanessa Kraven, Xia Brookside, Zatara, Zeuxis, Beth Pheonix

Zevon = Steve Austin, Triple H, Brock Lesnar, Batista, Rey Mysterio, Undertaker, John Cena, Randy Orton, Edge, Sheamus, Roman Reigns, Shinsuke Nakamura, Asuka, Becky Lynch, Seth Rollins, Drew McIntyre, Charlotte Flair,  Booker T, William Regal, Bad News Barrett, Baron Corbin, Christian, The Miz, Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, MVP

Anthony = Steve Austin, Triple H, Kurt Angle, Rob Van Dam, Brock Lesnar, Batista, John Cena, Randy Orton, AJ Styles, The Miz, CM Punk, Daniel Bryan, Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns, Kazuchika Okada, Kenny Omega, Ted DiBiase, Ric Flair, The Rock, William Regal, Prince Devitt, Charlotte Flair, Sasha Banks, Mustafa Ali, Prince Nana, Prince Puma, Awesome Kong, Mickie James, Michelle McCool, Madison Eagles, Gail Kim, Cheerleader Melissa, Paige, Nikki Bella, Asuka, Ronda Rousey, Becky Lynch, Natalya, Jimmy Jacobs, Aliyah, Alexa Bliss, The Authority, Kairi Sane, Carmella, Toni Storm, Chrissy Rivera, Chelsea Green

Claudine = Michelle McCool, Kurt Angle, Roman Reigns, Rey Mysterio, AJ Styles, Quinn Ojinnaka, Eddie Guerrero, Pat Patterson, Shawn Michaels, Naomi, Nor Diana, Goldberg, Mustafa Ali, Kacy Catanzaro, Ricochet, Candice LeRae, Mandy Rose, Lacey Evans (as a face), Bayley (as a face), Becky Lynch (as The Lasskicker), Dana Brooke, Sami Zayn (as a face).

Diego = Elias, Street Profits, R-Truth, Carmella, Sasha Banks, Bayley, Shawn Michaels, Jericho, Cameron, Naomi, Marty Jannetty, Shayna Baszler, Drake Maverick, The Rockstar, John Cena, Lita, Mickie James, Jeff Jarrett, Jeff Hardy, Matt Hardy, Samoa Joe, Lio Rush, Braun Strowman, Rusev, The Rock, Aiden English, Bobby Roode, Hulk Hogan, Lana

Opal = Ricochet, Kota Ibushi, Rey Mysterio, Io Shirai, AJ Styles, Jeff Hardy, Evan Bourne, Owen Hart, Jushin Thunder Liger, Kane, Randy Savage, Scott Steiner, Lita, Christian, Jamie Noble, Matt Hardy, Gail Kim, Daniel Bryan, Xavier Woods, Kofi Kingston, Tajiri, Zelina Vega, Ayako Hamada, Aliyah, Naomi, Mio Shirai

Ariana = Lady Apache, La Amapola, Marcela, Lioness Asuka, Dynamite Kansai, Chigusa Nagayo, Dump Matsumoto, Mae Young, Luna Vachon, Leilani Kai, Sarah Stock, Natalya, Cheerleader Melissa, Ayako Hamada, Beth Phoenix, Mariko Yoshida, Gail Kim, Mickie James, Sara Del Rey, Akira Hokuto, Alundra Blayze, Judy Grable, Wendi Richter, Bull Nakano, June Byers, Jaguar Yokota, Chyna, Sherri Martel, Awesome Kong, Lita, Mildred Burke, Aja Kong, Trish Stratus, Manami Toyota, Becky Lynch, Charlotte Flair, Paige, AJ Lee, Marie LaVerne, Joyce Grable, Ann Casey, Sue Green, Rachel Dubois, Debra, Stephanie McMahon, Victoria, Candice Michelle, MsChif, Sasha Banks, Asuka, Michelle McCool, Madison Eagles, Jazz, Jacqueline, Nikki Bella, Alicia Fox, Ivory, Roman Reigns, and Seth Rollins

Lil’ Shang = Edge, Christian, Rey Mysterio, Triple H, Shawn Michaels, Brett Hart, Jim Neidhart, Undertaker, Kane, Finn Balor, Ho Ho Lun, Big Boa, Rocky, The Rock, Rikishi, Mick Foley, Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho, Daniel Bryan, Jinder Mahal, Booker T, Fit Finlay, R-Truth, Trish Stratus, Lita, Victoria, Jazz, Molly Holly, Beth Phoenix, LuFisto, Lance Storm, Road Dogg, Umaga, The New Day, Bianca Belair, Street Profits

Artie = Tyler Bate, Trent Seven, Pete Dunne, Jordan Devlin, Kenny Williams, Ligero, Nick Aldis, Drew McIntyre, Finn Balor, Sheamus, Becky Lynch, Nikki Cross, Paige, James Drake, Bea Priestley, Ayesha Raymond, Zoe Lucas, Tegan Nox, Layla, Lana Austin, Bad News Barrett, Drake Maverick, Isla Dawn, Priscilla Kelly, Joe and Mark Coffey, Finlay, Nadia Sapphire, Eddie Dennis, Mark Andrews, Morgan Webster

Carina = Andre the Giant, Tamina, Lana, Maryse, Taynara Conti, Gisele Shaw, Becky Lynch, Charlotte Flair, Sasha Banks, Trish Stratus, Rhea Ripley, Indi Hartwell, Alexa Bliss, Bayley, Liv Morgan, Natalya, Toni Storm, Kay Lee Ray, Nia Jax, Mortar, Tegan Nox, Chyna, Lita, Asuka, Kairi Sane, Io Shirai, Kagetsu, Melanie Cruise, Shotzi Blackheart, Dakota Kai, Mia Yim, Candice LeRae, Riho, Sarah Logan, Hikaru Shida, Aja Kong, Bull Nakano

Doug is a manager. As a manager, his inspirations are Paul Heyman, Zelina Vega, Lana, and Bobby Heenan. Smee kids and Elle are commentators. The boys tend to like Michael Cole, Beth Phoenix and Byron Saxton. Elle tends towards JR, Corey Graves and Renee Young. Dizzy is a reporter back stage, but her favourite wrestlers to watch are Bayley, Kylie Rae, Breezango, and Princess Kimberly as a face. She gets her professional inspiration from Renee Young, Gene Okerlund, Charly Caruso and Cathy Kelley.

[monstermaster13]

Female Character TF Bingo List:

Lee (Critters 2)

Lady Amalthea (Last Unicorn)

She Hulk (Marvel)

Lady Dimitrescu (Resident Evil)

Lillith (Bordello of Blood)

Carrie White.

Nadine Cross.

Constance (Taz Mania)

Constance Hatchaway.

Karen Boyer (Spies Like Us)

Fran Fine (The Nanny).

Tiffany Valentine.

Jun/Unknown (Tekken Tag Tournament).

Santanico Pandemonium. -Alexandra, Jane or Suki (Witches of Eastwick)

Sarah Sanderson.

Selina Kyle/Catwoman (Batman Returns)

Carrigan (Casper)

Elvira.

Angela Franklin.

Buffy Summers.

Lisle Von Rhuman.

Any Monster High girl.

Tigra.

Lola Bunny.

Nancy Downs.

Trash (Return of the Living Dead)

Sil (Species)

Mirage (Aladdin tv series).

Lopunny.

Hatterene.

Salazzle.

Ari (Planet of the Apes 2001).

Felicia (Darkstalkers)

Peggy Bundy (Married with Children)

Beverly Goldberg (The Goldbergs)

Bowsette

Mona Lisa Vito (My Cousin Vinny)

Lorraine Mcfly (Back to the Future)

Lydia Deitz (Beetlejuice)

Barbara Maitland (Beetlejuice)

Marsha Quist (The Howling)

Minerva Mink.

Julie Bruin.

Mary Corleone.

Mrs Lovett.

Dawn Bellwether.

-Selene (Underworld).

Beatrice Horseman.

Ms Kitty.

Rayne (Bloodrayne)

Vera Webster.

Seven of Nine.

Annie Wilkes.

May Day (A View to A Kill).

[holdmytesseract]

At Thor's and Jane's house; quite a few miles away from the Avengers compound...

Snow flakes dance outside of the window. Fairy lights are everywhere. The smell of Christmas wafts through the house.

Jane & Y/N: standing in the kitchen and preparing dinner, as the lines of Ed Sheeran's & Elton John's 'Merry Christmas' sound through the rooms

Thor: rummages through the closet in the bedroom upstairs; searching for the santa hat while he tries to squeeze his muscular legs inside the red trousers of his costume

Frigga: sits on the sofa beside Odin; holding her newest grandson Erik; eyes glittering with love

Eisa & Ella: trying to teach their grandfather how to play Paw Patrol Uno

Eisa, giggling: No, grandpa, you can't play the reverse card now.

Odin, completely confused: Why can I not?

Ella, giggling as well: Because you are not allowed to. Eisa played the skip card. points at it

Odin, shaking his head: By the Norns... What a devious game...

Ella & Eisa (and even Frigga): trying to suppress the giggles

Loki: is on his way to the kitchen, in order to show his wife how he dressed up Narfi

Loki: Come on, little man, let's show your mama how sweet you look.

Narfi: wears a Christmas elf costume with the cutest green hat on top of his tiny raven locks

Narfi: Narfi elf! giggles

Loki: chuckles Yes, buddy. You're a cute, little Christmas elf.

Loki: Darling, look at our little Frost Giant.

Y/N: eyes widen as she sees Narfi

Y/N, laughing: Oh my, babe! He looks soo cute!

Y/N: takes the little boy in her arms

Y/N: You look so cute, sweetie. smooches Narfi's cheek

Jane: can't help but laugh as well

Jane: He's the sweetest elf I've ever seen. boops her nephew's nose

Loki: just smiles; enjoys to spend the most wonderful time of the year with his whole family

divider by @jiyaxedits

a/n: Christmas greetings from the Baby Fever universe! 😉🎅🏻🎄🤍

PS. I couldn't resist to pick this song. Sorry. 👀🤭

Baby Fever Crew: @lady-rose-moon @muddyorbsblr @chennqingg @smolvenger @alexakeyloveloki @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @jennyggggrrr @stupidthoughtsinwriting @eleniblue @loz-3 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @fictive-sl0th @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @lovingchoices14 @glitchquake @lokidbadguy @icytrickster17 @mandywholock1980 @november-rayne @xthatpottahfanx @simping-for-marvel @lou12346789 @aagn360 @anukulee @multifandom-worlds @hisredheadedgoddess28 @vbecker10 @jaidenhawke @km-ffluv @lokiforever @crimson25 @kimanne723 @cakesandtom @buttercupcookies-blog @salvinaa @javagirl328 @noideakitten @zombiesnips-blog @dustychinchilla74 @frzntrx @lokisgoodgirl @princess-ofthe-pages @coldnique @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokisrealpurpous @huntedmusicgardenn

[forlornmelody]

Inside an East Side Dive

So...I wrote a little something for Kaidan Appreciation Week. This might fit the Childhood category? He’s technically 19 in this, but still living with the ‘rents. Anyway, here’s a story about Kaidan when he’s not at his best. Same universe as Never Meet Your Heroes and Double The Trouble. 

Rating:T 

Ship: FemShep/Kaidan ish. 95% platonic

Content Warnings: Implied drug use and implied underage prostitution

AO3 Link: here.

“Get moving kid. You’re in the wrong place.” Kaidan had ducked inside the east side dive, only to come face to face—er face to chest with the hugest bouncer he had ever seen.

“What do you want? A cover? My ID?” Kaidan backed up a step, digging out his wallet. He tried anyway, several credit cards and membership cards scattered on the ground before he could reach his ID. Damn his shaking hands. Reminding himself that he wouldn’t have to deal with it much longer, he bent down to grab the contents of his wallet.

The bouncer grabbed Kaidan by the collar of his jacket. “I said get. We don’t want your kind here.” He hoisted him off the floor. His breath reeked of cheap smokes and decay. “Go get your kicks somewhere else.”

Kaidan wracked his brain for a name. What was her name? All his brain would think about was sand. “Jane sent me!” Red sand. “She told me to meet her here!”

“Real funny, kid.” The bouncer reared back, preparing to launch him out the door. Kaidan braced himself for landing on the concrete.

“Wait!” That wasn’t Jane. Was it? No. This girl’s voice was deeper than Jane’s. Jane spoke with the crisp whiteness of winter while this girl’s words rolled off her tongue like a summer breeze.

The bouncer rolled his eyes, letting Kaidan hang in the air as he turned back to face her. “For?”

She didn’t look like much. Scrawny little thing. Probably a couple years younger than him. Her brown eyes glanced between him and the bouncer. “He’s with me.” She fidgeted, pushing her red bangs out of her face.

“Sure he is.”

“He is!” She stomped her foot emphatically, giving him a steady look. “Aren’t you…?”

“Kaidan,” He added helpfully.

“Kaidan came here to get his supply. His place’s too hot with his dad in town.”

“Uh huh.” The bouncer shook his head, but dropped Kaidan anyway. “He causes any trouble and I’m telling Caine about you both.”

“He won’t be a problem.” She looked at him pointedly. “Right?”

Kaidan stumbled to his feet, shaking his head vigorously. “No trouble here.”

She guided him away from the front door, past the bar and dance floor to one of the back rooms. Shutting the door behind them, she ‘locked’ the knob with the back of a chair. “Alright, kid. Why are you here?” Turning to face him, she leaned against the door and folded her arms.

“Kid? I’m older than you!” He backed up, only to run into a bed. Wait. Did she think this was? Oh no.

“Uh huh.”

Kaidan rubbed his face. “Fine. I came here for some red sand.”

“We don’t deal that here in the club. Too easy for the cops to pick up.”

“I know that!” He hated the desperate tone in his voice, but it couldn’t be helped. It had been days, and his body needed that sand. “Jane stopped returning my calls. She was supposed to meet me two days ago.”

She blinked. “What’d she look like?”

“I dunno! Dark hair? About your height?”

“Not helpful, Kallen.”

“Kaidan.”

“Whatever.”

“ Look, I don’t really remember faces. All I remember is that her name is Jane.”

She laughed, shifting on her feet. “You really don’t get it, do you?”

“Get what?” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, trying to control the shaking. His bones felt like they’d rattle right out of his body.

“Nearly every girl here goes by Jane. Only the big boss ladies go by something else.”

“Like the Ice Queen.” He’d heard stories. Artemis Rayne—most feared woman this side of Vancouver. Cross her path and you’d probably not live to tell about it.

“Yeah.” She stepped closer, and her voice dropped low. “How badly do you want that sand?” Her hand dipped into her pocket, and her fist closed around what sounded like a zip lock bag. Enough to last a week, maybe more if he rationed it out.

“I—I have 500 credits.” He dug them out of his wallet. Most people on this side of town didn’t carry omni tools. Kaidan held them out for her to see.

Her eyes widened. “Christ. This what you normally give her?”

Kaidan nodded.

“No wonder your Jane skipped town.” Her hand closed over his, and she licked her lips. “I…I can make you a better deal.” She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes.

Opening his mouth to make what he hoped was a polite refusal, Kaidan felt his biotics buzz as they interacted with a nearby field.

The girl jumped back, her face going white. “You’re one of those freaks.” She swallowed hard, pacing back and forth. “I should’ve known.”

“I’m a biotic, thank you. And like you should talk. I felt the field coming off of you. You’re one of us too.”

“Am not!” Her eyes flashed blue, as if to prove his point.

“Not a very strong one, though. What amp do you have?” Kaidan ducked behind her, trying to see what she had plugged into her port.

“What the hell are you doing, Alenko?” She backed against the wall, holding the back of her neck.

Kaidan blinked. “You don’t have one.”  She looked young enough for an L3. “How do you not have an implant?”

She shook, her eyes flaring again with fury. “Not all of us have a rich Alliance officer for a daddy.”

“You know my dad?” God, Kaidan hoped not. He did not want to imagine his dad hanging around the Tenth Street Reds and all they had to offer.

“Major Kaidan Alenko, right? I’ve seen him in the newspaper.” She gave him a once over. “You look a lot like him. You must be Junior.”

“Just Kaidan, if you don’t mind.” He cleared his throat. “You never told me yours.”

She shrugged. “You can call me Jane. Everyone else does.”

“Must get confusing.” Kaidan started to laugh, then he saw the look in her eyes. “You uh…going to sell me the sand or not?”

She fiddled with the bag again. Sand. His head pounded like a loud drum. Sand. “How’d a good kid like you get into this junk?” She approached the bed, sitting on the edge of it.

“Does it matter?” Kaidan didn’t really want to get into it. He was so damn tired of talking about it.

“Was it a party? Some cute girl at Jump Zero?”

“Don’t talk to me about Jump Zero.” He snapped.

Jane flinched a little, but she didn’t back away. She grabbed his hand. “I can see the red dust under your finger nails. The red lines in your eyes.”  Her thumb traced his. “You’ve been doing this for a couple months. If you stop now you won’t feel it the rest of your life.”

“You are the worst drug dealer I’ve ever seen.”

Laughing, Jane stood up, pulling the chair away from the door. “I’m not a drug dealer.” She pulled the door open, motioning for him to leave. “Used to run the stuff, but you know.” Jane shrugged it off, her eyes distant. “Times change.”

Later, Kaidan found half his credits back in his pocket. How Jane snuck them in there without him noticing, he could never figure out.

Years later, Captain David Anderson introduces him to the famous (infamous?) Commander Shepard on their first day on the Normandy. She smiles at him warmly, her red bangs swept neatly from her face. Probably not within regs, but when you survive Akuze, maybe they let you get away with more. Kaidan shakes her hand, and he feels a familiar biotic field. It’s stronger this time around. Probably thanks to her L3 implant.

“Pleasure to meet you, Lieutenant.”

Kaidan’s jaw drops ever so slightly, and he manages to shut it before Anderson notices. Faces he never remembered, but Kaidan would never forget the sound of her voice.

[robynqueenofstuff]

Something I’ve Always Wanted To Say To Those Who Complain About A Lack Of Good Female Characters.

Yes we are just SHORT on good female characters, aren't we?

‘Takes a ginormous breath’

I mean besides Ellen Ripley, The Bride, Katniss Everdeen, Imperator Furiosa, Rey, [insert surname here] Princess Leia, [One of the greatest fucking characters ever] Sarah Connor to just name the most well-known few. We only have Hermione Granger [obviously], Luna Lovegood, Ginny Weasley, Minerva Mcgonagoll, Molly Weasley, Lily Potter, Bellatrix Lestrange, Jyn Erso, Padme Amidala, Hera Syndulla, Sabine Wren, Mara Jade, Jaina Solo, Tahiri Veila, Jan Ors, Nomi Sunrider, Lumiya, Juno Eclipse, Bastila Shan, Satele Shan, Ahsoka Tano, Barriss Offee, Luminara Unduli, Aayla Secura, Adi Gallia, Shaak Ti, Jaden Korr [Optionally female], Asajj Ventress, Aurra Sing, Zam Wesell, Steela Gerrara, The Seventh Sister, Satine Kryze, Shmi Skywalker, Darth Zannah, Mother Talzin, [The fucking Hapes Consortium places women higher over men] Belle, Jasmine, Mulan, Pocahontas, Tiana, Jane, Rapunzel, Ariel, Cinderella, Megara, Lilo, Nani, Nala, Vanellope, Lady, Merida, Jessie, Dory, Helen/Elastigirl, EVA, Edna Mode, Joy, Sadness, Anna, Elsa, [Yes i think she's a good character but for different reasons than others do] Kida, Wendy, Alice, Judy Hopps, Kanga, Kala, Captain Amelia, Moana, Esmeralda, Flora, Fauna, Merryweather, Rita, Miss Bianca, Mary Poppins, Eglantine Price, Sally, Audrey Ramirez, Mittens, Maleficent, Ursula, Cruella De Vil, Queen Grimhilde, Yzma, Lady Tremaine, Queen Of Hearts, Madame Medusa, Mother Gothel, Honey Lemon, Go-Go, Chel, Marina, Eris, Tigress, Ginormica, Roxanne, Astrid, Valka, Ginger, Fiona, Fairy Godmother, Tzipporah and Miriam. Chihiro, San, Moro, Lady Eboshi  Sophie, Kiki, Shizuku, Arrietty, Ponyo, Nausicaa, Princess Kushana, Kaguya, Sheeta,  Marnie, Annie, Coraline, Anastasia, Mrs Brisby, Elle Woods, Dorothy, Matilda, Alicia Huberman, Violet, Corky, Alice Creed, Clarice Starling, Mrs Danvers, Janine Melnitz. Kylie Griffin, Junior Ghostbuster Catherine, [yeah there were already female Ghostbusters before that crappy movie] Lisbeth Salander, Mathilda Lando, Marge Gunderson, Judge Cassandra Anderson, Ma-Ma, [Madeline Madrigal] Regina George, Cady Heron, Clementine Kruczynski, M, [the one played by Judi Dench] Moneypenny,, Elle Driver, O-Ren Ishii, Julie Kohler, Yuki Kashima, Amelie Poulain, Lucy, Rose Dewitt Bukater, Joy ‘Ma’ Newsome, Grace Howard, Philomena Lee, Ofelia, Kara, [From Dragonheart] Sarah Williams, Maria von Trapp, Marion Ravenwood, Dr. Elsa Schneider, Evelyn Carnahan, Officer Anne Lewis, Dr Ellie Sattler, Paikea Apirana, Motoko Kusanagi, Carrie White, Arwyn, Eowyn, Galadriel, Yu Shu Lien, Jen Yu, Jackie Brown, Nefretiri,  All the girls from St Trinians, Bliss Cavendar, The girls on the Roller Derby Team, [Maggie Mayhem, Bloody Holly, Rosa Sparks, Smashley Simpson] Sally Albright, Jean Louise ‘Scout’ Finch, Claire Standish. Allison Reynolds, Kim Possible, She-Ra, [Plus the female characters in She-Ra and He-Man] Jem, Synergy, The Holograms, The Misfits, Penny Gadget, Jessica Jones, Buffy Summers, Willow Rosenberg, Anya Jenkins, Faith, Cordelia Chase, Drusilla, Emma Swan, Carol Peletier, River Tam, Xena, Lady Penelope, Roseanne, Dana Scully, Morticia Addams, Wednesday Addams, Lily Munster, Vastra and Jenny, Jessica Fletcher, Olivia Benson, Lilly Rush, Korra, Asami Sato, Lin Beifong, Opal Beifong, Suyin Beifong, Kya, Daria Morgendoffer, Jane Lane, Susan Foreman, Barbara Wright, Jo Grant, Donna Noble, River Song, Ace, Nyssa, Romana, Sarah Jane, Clara Oswald, [the majority of the Doctor Who companions are female] Madame Vastra, Jenny, Zoe Washburne, Kaywinnet Lee ‘Kaylee’ Frye, Lagertha Lothbrok, Claire Underwood, Uhura, Nurse Chappell, Nurse Abby, Captain Katherine Janeway,  B’elanna Torres, Seven Of Nine, Kira Nerys, Jadzia Dax,  Deanna Troi,  Penelope Garcia, Kima Greggs, Evelyn Salt, Starbuck, Lois Lane, Katara, Toph, Mai, Azula, Suki, Ty-Lee, June, Serras Victoria, Sir Integra Hellsing, Dr. Girlfriend, Elektra Nachios, Alex Drake, Cameron, [Even if she's a cyborg she counts] Veronica Mars, ALL THREE CHARLIE'S ANGELS, THE POWERPUFF GIRLS, The female rangers in Power Rangers,  Sabrina Spellman, The majority of characters from My Little Pony, Mabel Pines, Wendy Corduroy, The Crystal Gems, Princess Bubblegum, Marceline The Vampire Queen, Flame Princess, Princess Allura, Katie ‘Pidge’ Holt, Violet Baudelaire, Lucy Pevensie, Alice, [again] Nancy Drew, Annabeth Chase, Clarisse La Rue, Sally Jackson, Thalia Grace, Piper Mclean, Hazel Levesque, [I AM GOING TO GET SO MUCH SHIT FROM PERCY JACKSON FANS BECAUSE THESE ARE THE ONLY ONES I CAN THINK OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD]  Daenerys, Arya, Margaery, Catelyn, Brienne, Olenna, Sansa, Susan Sto Helit, Liessa Dragonlady, Tiffany Aching, Hannah Wolfe, The female characters in Malazan Book Of The Fallen, Harriet The Spy, Althea Vestrit, Aerin, Sorcha, Daine, Sabriel, Maka Albarn, Tsubaki Nakatsukasa, Liz and Patty Thompson, Meryl Strife, Milly Thompson, Winry Rockbell, Izumi Curtis, Riza Hawkeye,  Mikasa Ackerman, Pepper Potts, Gwen Stacy, Black Cat, Wonder Woman [That’s a fucking no brainer], Batgirl, Batwoman, Supergirl, Raven, Starfire, Huntress, Black Canary, Zatanna, Catwoman, Hawkgirl, Mera, Katana, Talia Al Ghul, Enchantress, Poison Ivy, Black Widow, Scarlet Witch, Natasha Irons, Storm, Rogue, Ms Marvel, Emma Frost, The Wasp, Invisible Woman, She-Hulk, Gamora, Kitty Pryde, Psylocke, Valkyrie. Mystique, the female Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D, Not to mention the girls from Fables, Rayne, Clementine, Amanda Ripley, Coco Bandicoot, Bayonetta, Ms Pacman, Valna, Yuko, Amu, Lena, Alex, Etna, Flonne, Jennifer, Raspberyl, Vulcanas, Usalia, Maya Amano, Ulala Serizawa, Yukari Takeba, Fuuku Yamagashi, Chie Satonaka, Yukiko Amagi, Rise Kujikawa, Naoto Shirogane, Ann Takamaki, Haru Okumura, Kyoko Kirigiri, Sakura Ogami, Aoi Asahina, Chiaki Nanami, Sonia Nevermind, Akane Owari, Fiora, Melia, Sharla, BB Hood, Morrigan, Felicia, Q-Bee, Lara Croft, Samus Arran, Aya Brea, Elizabeth Comstock, Ellie, Faith, Jill Valentine, Ada Wong, Garnet Til Alexandros XVII, Tifa Lockhart, Aerith Gainsborough, Yuffie Kisaragi, Rydia, Rosa Joanna Farrell, Celes Chere, Terra Branford, Relm Arrowny, Rinoa Heartilly, Quistis Trepe, Selphie Tilmitt, Ultimecia, Ashe, Fran, Freya Crecent, Eiko Carol, Yuna, Rikku, Lulu, Aqua, Zelda, Midna, Alice from Mcgee, Odessa Silverburg plus all the females in Fire Emblem, Vocaloid, Touhou  and Sid Meir’s Civilization. Not to mention the option to play as female characters in most of the LEGO games plus the option to play as a female in Mass Effect, Dragon Age: Origins, Elder Scrolls, World of Warcraft, Fallout, Saints Row, Fable, Terraria, Borderlands, Jade Empire, Neverwinter Nights, Rock Band 2, Tardew Valley, Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines, Fate, Harvest Moon: The Tale of Two Town, Guilty Gear, Overwatch,  Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat, Tekken, Dynasty and Samurai Warriors plus the enormous roster in League Of Legends, Every last female in Skullgirls, All the female Pokemon trainers, All the females from Magic The Gathering, Hit-Girl, Powergirl, Tigra, Lady Sif, Spider-Woman, Vixen, Witchblade, Lady Death, Stephanie Brown, Jem, Aeon Flux, Gwen, Morgana, Morgause, Nimueh, Maid Marian, Djaq, Lady Isabella Of Gisborne,  Irene Adler, Carolyn Berek, Serena Stevens, Megan Wheeler, Kate Beckett, Nikki Heat, The girls from Women’s Murder Club, Beatrice Adela Lestrange Bradley, Temperance Daesee Bradley, Brenda Leigh Johnson, Joanne Kilbourn, Josephina ‘Jo’ Lupo, Catherine Willows, Alex Rovias, Alicia Claus, Jennifer Tate, Sarah Kerrigan, Joanna Dark, Catherine 'Ann’ Archer, April Ryan, Claire Redfield, Alis Landale, Alyx Vance, Heather Mason, Elena Fisher, Amaterasu, Shantae, Rosalina, Chrodechild, Chris Lightfellow, Ellen from Folklore, Jade from Beyond Good And Evil, Maya from Septerra Core, Miriam from The Guardian Legend, The female characters from Dead Or Alive, And even if you choose to play as a male character in games like Mass Effect and Dragon Age there are still a number of female characters to choose from such as Liara T,Soni, Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, Ashley Williams, Miranda Lawson, Kahlee Sanders, Samara, Morinth, Dr Kelly Chambers, Samantha Traynor, Morrigan, Leliana, Wynne, Shale, Flenneth, Cassandra, Even older games have ones like Jill Of The Jungle, Debra Dare, Lady Bug, Kangaroo, The heroine from Secret Of Mana, The female ninja from Ninja Warriors, Princess Rosella from King’s Quest IV. Even Princess Peach and Daisy can count as they kick total amounts of ass in the racing and fighting games Nintendo puts out. Aunt Entity, Sergeant Rita Vrataski, Polgara The Sorceress, Cutie Honey, Vicki Barr, The girls from The Babysitters Club, The ladies from The Sleepover Club, Princess Cimorene, Egwene al Vere, Elizabeth Swann, Tia Dalma, Lieutenant Jordan O'Neil, Kyra/Jack, Carolyn Fry, Mimi Kirogoe, Hana, [The mother from Wolf Children who is now one of my favorite characters ever] The girl from The Fox And The Child, Annalise Keating, Lady Macbeth, Cherry Darling, Cathy Gale, Emma Peel, Cybersix, Elphaba, Samantha Barker, Karen Silkwood, [who was a real person] Meg Altman, Thelma Dickinson, Louise Sawyer, Shoshanna Dreyfus, Trinity, The girls from Charmed, Emma Swan, Regina Mills, Mina Harker from The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Pauline Hargraves, Max Caufield, Jodie Holmes, Samantha Greenbriar, Thea Queen, Squirrel Girl, Beatrix De Costa [Fire], Tora Olafsdotter [Ice], Wondergirl, Dazzler, Black Alice, Dove, Gypsy, Jade Canary, Cassandra Cain, Big Barda, Darna, The Boss, Meryl Silverburgh, Mei-Ling, Naomi Hunter, Sunny Gurlukovich, Olga Gurlukovich, Fortune, Quiet, GLADOS, SHODAN, Velma, Daphne, Miss Ernst/Grand High Witch, Sailor Moon and the Sailor Soldiers, [Sailor Venus, Sailor Mercury, Sailor Mars, Sailor Jupiter, Sailor Saturn, Sailor Uranus, Sailor Neptune, Sailor Pluto,] Bulma, the majority of the characters in Orange Is The New Black, Leslie Knope, Ann Perkins, April Ludgate, Asuka Langley Soryu, Haruko Haruhara, Nana Komatsu, Nana Osaki, Lucrezia Noin, Lady Une, Dorothy Catalonia, Sally Po, Reyna, Zoe Nightshade, Meg McCaffery, Calypso, The females from The 100, Alicia Melchiott, Isara Gunther, Cosette Coalhearth, Miku Hinasaki, Leah, [from Diablo]  Melody Farklight, The Totally Spies!, Mia Dolan, Kathy Selden,  Vianne Rocher, Princess Ann, [Ann ‘Smitty’ Smith] Margaret Hale, Lauren Olamina, Sara Crewe, Mary Lennox, Jennifer Simpson, Christine Collins, [Who was also a real person] Turanga Leela, Tauriel, The ladies from Steel Magnolias, All the female Transformers, Farah, Annie Sawyer, Nina Pickering, Gabrielle, Saturn Girl, Sage, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, She-Thing, Scorpion, Songbird, Silk Spectre II, Spider Girl, Silver Sable, The ladies of the Wildstorm universe, Fault Zone, Solara, The Wink, Paragon, Lady Deathstrike, Madame Masque, Cheetah, Emerald Empress, All 20 superheroines before Wonder Woman, Alanna of Trebond, The ladies of The Lunar Chronicles, Catti-Brie, Alyx, [From the Adventures Of Alyx books] The ladies from Marvel's Runaways series, Veronica Layton, Marguerite Krux, Mako Mori, Blaze The Cat, Toby 'Kissy' Masuyo, April Ryan, Mona Sax, Fox,  Ninja Princess, Papri, Lady Master Of Kung Fu, Reika Kirishima, The ladies from the Tales series, Noel Vermilian, Shield Knight, Petra from Emerald City Confidential, The ladies from Elsword, Anna Leonowens.[another lady from real-life but perhaps best known from The King And 1] Eliza Doolittle, Ree Dolly, Hushpuppy, Unicorn/Lady Amalthea,  Aeryn Sun, Chiana, Mallory Kane, Pauline Hargraves, Gwen Cooper, Toshiko Sato, Samantha Carter, The Tiger Woman, Barbara Meredith/The Black Whip, Hana Tsu-Vachel, Tessa Alvarado, Jo March, Liesel Meminger, Betty Barrett, Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Ladybug, Shelby Woo, Jaime Sommers, Molly Moon, Torchy Blane, Eliza Maza, Angela, Demona, Fox Xanatos, The girls from W.I.T.C.H, Mona The Vampire, The Worst Witch, Ms Frizzle, Carmen Sandiego, Leslie and Joni from Cluefinders, Ren Stevens, Jules Paxton and Jess Bhamra, [from Bend It Like Beckham] Hazel Grace Lancaster, Mara Of The Acoma, Aerin Dragon-Killer/Firehair, Angharad 'Harry' Crewe, The three sisters from Ballet Shoes, Anne Shirley, Lyra Belacqua, Kerowyn, Dashti, Sadie Kane, Zia Rashid, Samirah-Al-Abbas, Lydia Deetz, Juniper Lee, Gretchen, Spinelli, Alex Mack. Or female characters for really young kids such as Lizzie Mcguire, Andi Mack, Dora, Peppa Pig, Lola, Charlie, Looby Loo, Ramona Quimby, Pippi Longstocking, Star Butterfly,  Meg Murray, Madeline, Angelina Ballerina, The lovely ladies of Balamory, Jemima Puddle-Duck, and Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle. Or females from Greek mythology like Gaia, Hestia, Demeter, Nemesis, Medusa, Nyx, Ananke, Rhea, Athena, Demeter, Persephone, Artemis or their Roman counterparts. Or the ladies from Norse, Finnish or Egyptian Mythology. Or historical female figures to look up to such as Elizabeth the 1st, Joan Of Arc, Queen Cordelia, Queen Gwendolen, Ethelfreda, Boudicca, Florence Nightingale, Amelia Earhart, Marie Curie, Catherine The Great and Audrey Hepburn. You play as a female Avatar in Cooking Mama and all of the Imagine series, The Jurassic Park dinosaurs were all female, Minecraft allows female appearance through customized character skins EVEN BARBIE! THERE! I SAID IT!

But besides that entire fucking catalog, I find myself and the rest of the female population well under-represented.....Except of course for the huge fucking roster of female characters available.

[maddie-grove]

The Top Twenty Books I Read in 2016

Oh, 2016. The year that gave me a promising new life with one hand and ripped up what peace of mind I had left with the other. What better way to deal with such a confusing emotional state than to read a bunch of wonderful books, many about incredibly tough subjects? Arguably, there are many better ways, but I like reading.

20. Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock by Matthew Quick (2013)

Traumatized seventeen-year-old Leonard Peacock makes a plan to kill his former abuser and then himself, but first he needs to visit four people who are important to him and say goodbye (without, of course, letting them know he’s saying goodbye). Throughout the day, he’s caught between trying to talk himself out of his horrible goal and feeling he has no other option. This is an affecting, compulsively readable novel with experimental bits that really pay off (especially Leonard’s letters to himself from a semi-dystopian future).

19. Swamplandia! by Karen Russell (2011)

After her mother’s untimely death, thirteen-year-old Ava Bigtree’s family falls apart, along with their Floridian gator-wrestling theme park. Her senile grandfather is sent to a nursing home, her brother runs away to another theme park, and her father departs for the mainland for an indefinite time, leaving Ava alone with her séance-obsessed older sister Osceola. Then Osceola elopes with a ghost, driving Ava to take a perilous journey into the swamp.  At turns fanciful and brutal, this is a fascinating and spooky story about grief and how scary nature is.

18. Sweetest Scoundrel by Elizabeth Hoyt (2015)

In 1740s London, withdrawn Eve Dinwoody is appointed by her half-brother to sort out the accounts of his investment, a pleasure garden owned by the boisterous middle-class Asa Makepeace. Eve and Asa are complete opposites who disagree about all matters financial, but they also have chemistry and actually turn out to care about each other’s problems. The family relationships in this romance are particularly strong, plus I liked that the aristocratic characters were so tangential to the story; it’s mostly a story about theatre people.

17. Duke of Pleasure by Elizabeth Hoyt (2016)

Alf is a messenger/informant by day, a masked vigilante by night, and, unbeknownst to everyone she’s met since early childhood, a woman. Hugh Fitzroy, the Duke of Kyle, is a widowed father of two bent on bringing down a ridiculously depraved secret society. When Alf gets beaten up while in his employ, Hugh persuades her to stay in his home for protection…which leads to some complicated feelings for Alf (and Hugh, once he realizes she’s not a teenage boy). Like Sweetest Scoundrel, this is a part of the Maiden Lane series, and it’s a fine installment: tightly plotted and prettily written, with a delightfully unusual heroine and a protective hero of the best type.

16. Silver Deceptions by Sabrina Jeffries (1994, revised for 2016 reissue)

During the height of the English Restoration, Annabelle Taylor takes to the London stage and purposefully cultivates a bad reputation with the goal of finding out and shaming the aristocratic father who abandoned her.  Unfortunately, her discreet inquiries about his identity lead the king’s spies to think she has an anti-Royalist agenda. Colin Jeffreys, Lord Hampden, is sent to find out what her deal is, only to get caught up in something way more risky than a Roundhead plot (to his heart, anyway). This is easily the best Restoration romance I’ve read, with a beautifully realized setting, a fast-moving plot, and multilayered protagonists.

15. Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier (1938)

An unnamed narrator, young and awkward and alone in the world, marries the handsome, haunted Maxime de Winter after a whirlwind courtship in Monte Carlo. The problem is that she has trouble adjusting to being lady of the manor, plus he seems just shattered over the death of his beautiful, accomplished late wife…but is that what’s really going on? Kind of! I loved the weird, funny narrator, and the initial romance between her and Maxime is so sweet that its devolution once they get to Manderley hit me hard.

14. Sylvester, or the Wicked Uncle by Georgette Heyer (1957)

Sylvester Rayne, the Duke of Salford, does not want to marry Phoebe Marlow, the mousy granddaughter of his godmother…but he’s still miffed when she flees her father’s house in order to avoid marrying him. Then he finds out that she wrote a popular gothic novel whose hero bears a striking resemblance to him, and he’s really annoyed. This is a terrific comedy—the two unplanned road trips are particularly delightful. I also liked the heroine and how she comes into her own after years of being cowed by her stepmother.

13. Duke of Sin by Elizabeth Hoyt (2016)

Valentine Napier, the Duke of Montgomery (and half-brother to Eve Dinwoody), is a bad, bad man. He blackmails his peers, tries to abduct heiresses (he’s not that great at it), and pretends that he’s done even worse. Bridget Crumb, his housekeeper, is working in his household in hopes of helping her mother. She has every reason to hate and fear him…but instead she thinks he’s full of shit but kind of likes him anyway. In turn, he’s intrigued by the fact that she has morals and wears a huge mobcap to hide her hair. This is a balls-out ludicrous romance novel in the best possible sense, with enough emotional pathos to keep me seriously invested.

12. Rose Under Fire by Elizabeth Wein (2013)

Rose Justice, a young American flying planes for the British Air Transport Auxiliary during WWII, is captured by the Germans during a mission in France. Sent to Ravensbrück, she barely manages to survive the experience with the help of her fellow political prisoners and poetry. This book is less twist-driven than its companion Code Name Verity—the reader isn’t kept in much suspense about Rose’s eventual escape, let alone surprised with any revelation—but it has every good thing in common with the other novel: a complex and human narrator, a focus on women’s contributions to WWII, and a message of steely hope in the face of evil.

11. Crispin: The End of Time by Avi (2010)

In the third and final installment of the starkly beautiful medieval-set Crispin trilogy, thirteen-year-old Crispin finds himself bereft and unable to speak the language in war-torn France. He tries to get to Iceland, where everyone is free according to his late mentor, but he falls into bad company and has existential crises along the way. If you enjoy the most heart-shattering parts of A Song of Ice and Fire but wish the series had a smidge less violence and a lot less sex, this series might be for you! The ending is satisfying and holds the hope of hope, but good lord does it put you through the wringer.

10. The Study of Seduction by Sabrina Jeffries (2016)

When Lady Clarissa Lindsey finds herself being stalked by a sleazy French diplomat, family friend Lord Blakesborough agrees to help her out. They tend to clash—she’s gregarious and fun-loving, while he’s reserved to the point of stuffiness—but she wants the best for him, too, and tries to teach him how to talk to ladies so he can find a wife. Of course, everything goes wrong and they end up marrying each other for convenience…only it’s not so convenient, because they want to bang each other something fierce, plus they both have sad pasts they can’t talk about easily. A beautiful, hopeful romance with two extremely endearing protagonists.

9. A Scandalous Countess by Jo Beverley (2009)

Georgia, Lady Maybury, was the toast of society…until her beloved young husband was killed in a duel and everyone (wrongly) thought it was with her lover. Now she’s coming out of mourning, but someone has resurrected the most vicious rumors about her. She finds an unexpected ally in Lord Dracy, an awkward, badly scarred ex-naval officer who secretly wants to marry her for her money (at first). This novel is a glorious melodrama with an intriguing mystery and a wonderfully complex heroine.

8. Once Upon a Marquess by Courtney Milan (2015)

Lady Judith Worth used to have everything, but then her father was exposed as a traitor and committed suicide. Now she can barely pay rent on her shabby London home and all her siblings are either missing or in distress, but she’s still loathe to accept help from Lord Ashford, an old friend whose investigations helped bring about her family’s ruin. His charm, willingness to assist her, and ready acknowledgment that she has a right to be angry make it a bit easier, though. Courtney Milan is a National Treasure, and this complex series debut, alternately hilarious and heartrending, is among her best.

7. Emma by Jane Austen (1815)

Emma Woodhouse, rich and pretty and beloved by most, tries to be a good person, but that turns out to be a confusing business. I was frequently irritated by this novel, but honestly that made me love it more. On several occasions, Emma actually shocked me with her bad judgment, callousness, and even malice. At the same time, I saw that she was genuinely trying to do the right thing, even though she was severely hampered by classism and a lack of self-awareness. The contrast and the questions it raises are fascinating.

6. The Assassination of Margaret Thatcher by Hilary Mantel (2014)

This gorgeously written, endlessly unnerving anthology includes “The School of English” (the heartbreaking, infuriating tale of a London housekeeper starting a new job), “How Shall I Know You?” (the story of a pitying, pitiable writer on a miserable book tour), and the title story (a snapshot of an alternate history). Every story has excellent style and atmosphere; Mantel has a particular talent for making the reader feel queasy and excited at the same time.

5. Fortune Favors the Wicked by Theresa Romain (2016)

World-weary courtesan Charlotte Perry returns to her hometown in search of a stolen hoard, hoping that the reward will allow her to build a new life for herself and her “niece.” Lieutenant Benedict Frost, recently blinded and restless, travels to the same location in hopes of establishing a household where he can live with his younger sister. They should be adversaries…but perhaps they will not be? This was a nearly perfect romance; the central relationship was delicious, all the side characters were great, and the plot was very well-constructed.

4. The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith (2016)

After her brother’s best friend rapes her in her own bedroom, high school freshman Eden’s primary reaction is rage—not only at her rapist, but at the parents who overlook her, at the brother she’s sure wouldn’t believe her, and at herself for being quiet and trusting. Over the next few years, she builds a new identity for herself; unfortunately, it comes with self-destructive behavior and a tendency to push everyone away. This story is ultimately a hopeful one, but it’s a damn hard read. I cried like a tiny baby girl, and I often felt incredibly angry. Eden is a wonderful narrator, clear-eyed but still unable to extract herself from a morass of silence and self-punishment without help.

3. Room by Emma Donoghue (2010)

Five-year-old Jack has never left the room where he was born to his captive mother, or even learned that the outside world they see on television is real. All he knows is Room and Ma…until she tells him there’s a whole universe outside and shares her desperate escape plan. Room is an absolutely beautiful story, and it’s all the more wonderful because the characters are so individualized. Jack is a sweetheart, but he also does weird kid stuff, from the adorable (declaring broccoli his “enemy food”) to the dangerously inconvenient (getting angry at his mom when she tries to explain the outside world). Ma is even more complex, and it’s truly impressive how Donoghue can convey her anger, compassion, youthfulness, maturity, and everything else when she’s filtered entirely through her five-year-old son’s perspective. I also appreciated how much the novel is about recovery, with all its attendant joys and difficulties.

2. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou (1969)

In her classic first memoir, Angelou shares the story of her childhood in Arkansas and then California. I loved this book almost as much as its sequel Gather Together in My Name; it’s just as funny, heartbreaking, and sharply insightful. It can also be a much tougher read, due to the trauma she experiences in her childhood and the near-constant racism she faces, but her exploration of these issues just makes the book more powerful.

1. Gather Together in My Name by Maya Angelou (1974)

In this memoir, Angelou relates her experiences as a young woman in post-WWII California. She tries to care for her new baby, find a purpose in life, and look for someone to love, but she runs into many obstacles: bad boyfriends, racism, anti-Communist paranoia, an unfaithful dance partner, and an unplanned foray into running a brothel, just to name a few. Angelou’s second memoir is glorious, funny and poignant and righteously angry at turns. Even though my experiences are very different from hers, I related hard to her loneliness, lack of direction, and premature regret. The best book I read all year.