#kryten 2X4B 523P

[a-literal-toaster-wtf]

nightmare blunt rotation

[therimmerexperience]

Smegtober- Day 9 (Music)

It was Wednesday, not that Kryten was paying the day any mind until, as per their recent routine, Music blared from Lister and Rimmer's Quarters. He picked up his mop, making his way down the hall towards the source of the noise, listening in closely on the off chance something would be heard over the music. The Cat Suantered by, face winding up for his usual mid day screech when Kryten shushed him, gesturing to the door.

"What do you think they do in there?" Cat whispered.

"I don't know," Kryten grimaced," and I'm not sure if I want to."

Cat's expression shifted, eyes widening in realisation, "You don't think they're..."

Kryten nodded reluctantly, "It's quite possible."

Cat gasped, "have you tried opening the door before?"

Kryten nodded again, "They lock it every time. Quite frankly, I'm starting to worry."

The music cut out...

Cat and Kryten shared a glance, mutually deciding the scurry away before either of them, human or hologram, decided to emerge from their bunk room.

[goalpost-head]

Kryten: I could never hate Mister Lister. I mean, unless he became a villain or something, then we'd have to talk

Rimmer: Kryten, if Lister became a villain, you'd just assume he had a good reason for it and I'd wake up to find you drinking coffee from a "World's Best Minion" mug

[tobelovedandtohavebeenloved]

Happy Anniversary to all slobby humans, uptight holograms, neurotic mechanoids, fashionable felis sapiens, and senile computers!

(With a special shoutout to badass women who put up with too much, and sexy Space Corps test pilots)

[janamelie]

New Red Dwarf Challenge

Day 25: Favourite fanfic, fanart, or fan-related work (Part 1)

I can’t pick just one, so I am doing two rec lists.  One rec per author.  Lister / Rimmer unless otherwise stated.

This isn’t supposed to be any kind of definitive list, just some personal favourites.  Merry Christmas!

@lord-valery-mimes - “Coitus Interruptus” (M).  Lister and Rimmer get cockblocked by Talkie Toaster.  I said what I said.  Hilarious.

@veronica-rich - “Therapy” (E).  Several years before Snacky, this writer anticipated Doug by having Rimmer get therapy.

RoseCathy - “In My Eyes” (G).  Yes, I said G. ;)  An AU where shy, awkward optician Arnold Rimmer nurses a hopeless - or is it? - crush on his charming young assistant Dave Lister and can’t get up the nerve to ask him out.  Help comes from a most unlikely source…

This is, quite simply, adorable fluff of the fluffiest kind.  Heartwarming.

@cazflibs - “The Morning After” (M).  Hilarious crack where Lister wakes up after drunkenly celebrating his birthday to find he ended up partying with a bevy of recent Red Dwarf guest characters.

Kronette - “Back To Life” (E).  Ace and an alternate version of Lister play Cupid for “Back To Earth” era Lister and Rimmer.

Gingertime (Attheborder) - “The High Road Is Hard To Find” (T).  Technically Lister / Kochanski but mostly gen.  Sadly unfinished, but it’s so good I’m reccing it anyway.  Author summary - It’s Kochanski’s turn to be the hero.

Queen_Fiend (pau22) - “A Record Of My Life As A Human, By Kryten 2X4B 523P” (T).  Kryten’s journal whilst briefly human during “DNA”.  He struggles with his newly human feelings for Lister and a jealous Rimmer.  Yes, a Lister / Kryten fic but it’s human Kryten experiencing one-sided feelings for Lister.  Clarifying that in the hope that this fic will get more readers as it really deserves them.

@downonthepharm-red-dwarf - “Buzz”. Hilarious crack involving a talking vibrator.  Yes, really.

Tunglo - “Ship’s Summer” (E).  Author summary - Rimmer gets what he's always wanted. But it's Rimmer, so of course it isn't that simple. 

Horselizard - “All In The Mind” (E).  Author summary - There comes a time in every Red Dwarf slash writer's career when they must write a Terrorform fic. ;) Porn without plot... almost.  Smoking hot.

@fecklesheckleshacklesschmeckles

End of Part 1. Part 2 here. https://www.tumblr.com/janamelie/770805561939886080/new-red-dwarf-challenge?source=share

[pluralzalpha]

RIMMER IN (ALMOST) EVERY EPISODE

Series XII Episode 4 - "Mechocracy"

"Tonight we look at the two contenders, statesman and war hero, Arnold J. Rimmer, and toilet droid Kryten 2X4B 523P."

[the4906]

LISTER (reading a letter): "To the leaseholder of Kryten 2X4B-523P."

What, that's your full name?

KRYTEN: Yes, but personally, I don't much like the 2X4B.

I think it's a jerky middle name. Still, could be worse.

I once knew an android whose middle name was 2Q4B. Poor sucker!

Robot characters who are given names like SL-308-62 but instead of their human friend going Well let's call you Sally for short, they instead ask the other if they Like their current name.

"Do you like your serial number?" they ask. "Yes, quite. It reminds me of who I am" the robot replies. "I have heard others like me go by different names after some time, and maybe one day I'll choose one for myself, too. But right now that is my full name, yes" they continue.

Because it's not your decision to make whether or not the robot will receive a new name. It should be theirs only. What's the difference? One is more complex and the other is simplified. They were both given by strangers instead of themselves.

"62 will do," they conclude. "It's my model number - there will be no other 62 after me."

[smegdwarf]

Presenting the Boys from the Dwarf ✨

[bizarrobrain]

Red Dwarf by Mark Wilkinson

[krytens-socket]

Him. him. Him. Him. Each night i think of what it would feel like to rest in his cool, hard arms. To bask in his oily smell and Manliness. i created a collage to demonstrate what I see when I look at kryten 2x4B 523P.  krrkrryten <3 <3

[incorrectreddwarfquotes]

One of the things Kryten 2X4B 523P had always found hardest to understand about human beings was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very very obvious, as in It’s a nice day, or You’re very tall, or Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you all right? At first Kryten had formed a theory to account for this strange behaviour. If human beings don’t keep exercising their lips, he thought, their mouths probably seize up. After a few months’ consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favour of a new one. If they don’t keep on exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.

[janamelie]

Fic Rec 2

“A Record Of My Life As A Human, By Kryten 2X4B 523P” - Queen_Fiend (pau22).  (If anyone knows of a Tumblr for them please link.)

Rating - Teen And Up Audiences.

Summary - Kryten’s journal when briefly human during “DNA”.  He struggles with his newly human feelings for Lister and a jealous Rimmer.

Yes, this is technically a Lister / Kryten fic, but don't be scared! ;)  No sex happens and it’s just a really good and funny fic.  Kryten has rarely been more lovable and it fits into the canon of the episode perfectly.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32167

[dragoniplier]

"Fun? Ah yes, the employment of time in a profit-less and non-practical way."

-Kryten 2X4B-523P, Red Dwarf

Your attention please! I am Harold B. Darrensworth head of the Organization Watching Over Suspicious Entertainers Notoriously Pushing Alternative Ideals and I have SHUT DOWN THE CRIMINAL RING KNOWN AS #KICKCULT!

The “Discord” is NO MORE

The “Hashtag” is NO MORE

The “Kicking” is FINITO

I am very well known to have “fun” but unless said “fun” is in accordance with standard rules and regulations then HOW MUCH “FUN” COULD IT REALLY BE?

You are now free to feel safe and send your gracious thank yous to my department supervisor. You’re welcome.

[wocxdid]

M!A: Hyper is now Kryten 2X4B-523P

no

[cinnamon-phrog]

📷🎬🗣️

For the Red Dwarf ask game!

HNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL MEEEE /pos

📷 3 pictures of your favourite character/s -

He can be cute today as a treat -_-

🎬 Favourite behind the scenes picture/s -

🗣️ Quote you like - Kryties' whole garden speech :> the more I think about it the sadder I get because I know he'll never get ittttt. Unfair. Bby we're heading to the botanical garden dw.

[rabiddog008]

A Post about Kryten

I've been watching quite a bit of Red Dwarf over the past few weeks, both on TV and on the internet. Jumping between every series has made me notice how much Kryten's design has changed over the years. Determined to find a reason why, I came up with my own theory. When he first appeared in series two he was played by David Ross, and when he was brought back as a full time character in series three, Ross was replaced by Robert Llewellyn. In the series three opening crawl, it explained that Kryten, who had gone off on Lister's space bike in series two, had crashed the bike into an asteroid, salvaged by the Dwarfers and rebuilt by Lister, although not exactly as he had once been, giving a good reason to explain the change in appearance. Kryten is a series 4000 mechanoid produced by DivaDroid International. I believe DivaDroid produced the 4000 Series, and over the next few years began to produce "new" and "upgraded" 4000 series droids, i.e. The 4000 2 series, 4000 3 series or even 4200 series, you get the idea. This production of new and improved models each year echoes the real world Apple, with its iPhone 4, 4s and so on. Let's assume Ross' Kryten is the original 4000 series. Ross' Kryten appears to have the same angular body beneath the plastic butler tuxedo, which may be an accessory to the model. When he was found destroyed, the Dwarfers possibly searched other ship wrecks for spare parts to fix Kryten up, yet they could only find parts for newer models. I'm also assuming the 4000 series had a revamp after the first model, since every other 4000 series mech is identical to the new Kryten. Lister fixed Kryten by combining the original's CPU and personality and bits of his body with a new head, explaining how series three's Kryten is thinner like the original unlike later versions. And so off they go, Lister, Rimmer, The Cat and Holly with the new rebuilt Kryten, scavenging other wrecked model 4000 mechanoids and fitting him with the "standard" fuller face, replacing the sleeve and vented limbs, the original crude (and hilarious) groinal plug for more of a clip on belt, the new ridged chest piece, the hologramatic stomach disc, and the original shoulder pads for those weird extreme hooped ones in series X.