#kory is used to the bat nonsense

[luliaka]

Nightwing (2016) #15

[thelibrarian1895]

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Brucie Wayne is often invited to charities, galas, openings to future trendy spots, and other similar things that the rich/famous are invited to attend and can't always refuse without social repercussions. Bruce has an algorithm that lets him figure out how many of these things he has to go to in order to most effectively maintain the Brucie mask and do the most good while still being able to have time for Batman/being a social awkward introvert. Bruce helps each of his kids adjust the algorithm to suit each of them and their social batteries and social persona.

The other awkward part of being famous, whether or not they come with a date. Brucie Wayne famously attends with various models, actresses, actors, singers, artists, and Selina Kyle who is a category to herself. The models/actors/actresses etc are chosen based on how likely they are to notice if Bruce sneaks away and how much they're really just wanting to go to an event for their own social networking. Most of them have no physical interest in Bruce but are willing to let people think they slept with Brucie because why not? Bruce is slightly less of a slut than he appears in that he doesn't tend to sleep with civilians though he won't necessarily say no.

Dick goes to events almost exclusively with Barbara, Donna, or Kori or as part of Bruce's group. In a pinch Stephanie might put on some makeup to look older and be his arm candy but he'd have to bribe her a lot. He's able to dodge most events since he has a much lower civilian profile. Dick will always show up as a volunteer for charity events.

Jason laughs at all his siblings and sometimes watches the news reports of events while eating popcorn. In this one situation, it's good to be dead. On occasion he might stage a kidnapping. He will also be on standby to help save the day/provide a distraction if an event where a Bat is attending as a civilian is attacked somehow. He is there as security and a volunteer for charity events.

If Jason is forced back into the limelight, he will claim trauma and be famously a hermit and still stay at home and laugh at whichever sucker is stuck attending while he eats popcorn/watches to make sure that nothing goes wrong. If it's a charity event where something is actually being done, like a walk for charity or handing out things then Jason will be there as one of the volunteers and not as Jason Wayne.

Tim Drake Wayne is stuck going to the most events after Bruce and he is enormously annoyed by the fact. He has his own algorithm. He'll either go to an event as part of Bruce's group or he'll get a member of YJ to come as his arm candy. He, of course, makes sure they have a dress or suit that's appropriate for the evening. Cissie is the one who acts as arm candy for him most often since she can use the events for her own networking and has the most patience for all that nonsense. Bart will do many things for Tim, but he won't do this. He will, however, be ready to extract Tim and Tim's companion at a moment's notice. Cassie, Greta, and Anita will only go if there's going to be really good food or Tim treats them to something extra delicious and an opportunity to beat something up afterwards, Tim also has to pay for babysitters for Anita. Kon is the one who goes with Tim most often after Cissie and he and Tim whisper various commentary to one another about the other attendees. Whoever makes the other laugh out loud picks their next outing together. All of them will show up for charity events, handing out food and drinks or doing whatever, as long as their schedules will allow.

Stephanie, like Jason, watches with popcorn since she's not an official Wayne. She'll sometimes be Tim or even Dick's arm candy but otherwise is suited up and ready to cover the attendee's patrol or save the hapless civilians at a moment's notice. Never has she been more glad to not be famous than after an evening of attending ONE trendy event and being patronized and unable to punch someone the entire evening. She will also be one of the volunteers at charity events that have volunteers.

Cass will accompany Bruce or Tim and then hang out by the food. She has little interest in being at whatever event, unless it's for charity, and is plotting how to be another Wayne family hermit. She does like being a volunteer at charity events.

Duke sticks to Cass at events if he has to go or he sticks to Bruce. He plans to be exclusively the Wayne that goes to charity events, something he'll have to battle with all the rest of the family about since they all would rather be the Wayne at charity events.

Damian, a child, is not looking forward to the various social activities that help maintain a civilian mask. He's torn between being the next Wayne of Wayne enterprises or following Dick's footsteps and going for a lower civilian profile.

[sparkletastic-cookiedough]

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Favorite Posts

Batman: Killer Croc has an egg. Bruce Wayne is the father. (NEW)

DPxDC: Danny Phantom fan Damian, best friends with Dash. (they hang out at an arcade, also BATNIPPLES)

DPxDC: John Constantine is Danny's comfort human

DPxDC Dick Grayson is investigating a travelling circus (my favorite prompt, but it's just a prompt)

DPxDC: Vlad masters is a lion? Completely centered around Zeke Morris, an OC.

DPxDC: Danny does his taxes.

DPxDC: Cardboard Danny AU

Danny Phantom: Jazz Fenton Gaslighting People (Short)

DPxDC: The Tangerine Pimpernel (Long)

DPxDC: Danny is applying for a grant with Wayne Enterprieses (The best dramatic irony)

DPXDC: Constantine taking care of baby Danny

DPxDC

Psychology Teacher Jazz Fenton vs Joker

Mr Lancer goes to a bar while his students visit Gotham.

Battle Coliseum

Danny in a Maid Dress

The Phantom Cafe (Short)

In Love With The Speed Force : Barry Allen is obsessed with a god. Also the Justice League gets high in this one.

Bartender Dan has a no bats policy.

The Justice League investigates Danny's box selling business. (Featuring the Bodacious Vibes detector)

The Titans discover Danny and Dani are different people

Danny has access to dead knowledge

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Trans Danny, mourned by Bio-sibling Damian

The one where Team Phantom destroys all conflict in the Batman universe

Dani is in Hally's Circus, Dick thought she died and now she's back

John Constantine "rescues" Danny from the ghost zone

Steph plans to prank Batman

Bodyguard Danny

Danny vs Plastic Man vs Nightwing: Who would win at Twister? (short)

Wes Weston gets ghost powers, Flash is concerned

Riddler kidnaps Danny, Batman has to answer a riddle to save him

Team Phantom produces a fictional movie on Amity Park

Danny is traumatized, the Batfam is traumatized, everyone is sad and traumatized. (short-ish, hurt/ comfort)

Danny can predict the future, thus Flash yells at god (again, more of a prompt than a full story, cause sometimes I only write the beginnings.)

Dani pranks the justice league

The DC universe is about to collapse, Danny has to herd them out. (Prompt, as I am addicted to beginning stories and never finishing them)

Danny's family reincarnates (yet another prompt.)

Tim has infinite spleens

Jason can see through the fourth wall, and is not down for this Phantom of the Opera nonsense.

The Bats investigate Jazz

Wes is investigated by Superman, Magical shenanigans occur.

Catwoman steals an artifact that has a ghost in it.

Danny putting on his own Brucie Wayne act as Bruce's secretary

Jazz as Damian's Babysitter

Zatanna interacting with a Liminal Gotham

Danny is Batman's Clone (Dramatic Irony, my beloved)

John Constantine accidentally adopts Danny

Jason is dating Jazz, gets Tim and Danny to meet (mostly just Jason and Tim fluff)

Dash Baxter, Metropolis Cop (short)

Queer Platonic Relationship Fluff with Tim and Danny (features a prompty cliffhanger that goes absolutely nowhere)

Danny runs over Kori with a car (featuring yet another cliffhanger prompt ending that goes nowhere)

Clone Adoption Agency

Tim gets his spleen back from Cujo

Danny runs a daycare in Gotham

Maddie is Jim Gordon's Sister (short as heck and not great, but it's the first one I wrote, so it's special to me)

Batman Crossovers (No Danny Phantom edition)

Batman and the Muppets

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Batman x Game Changer: Robins do Robin trivia

Batman x BNHA: Batgirl gets isekaied into BNHA universe (Like the first chapter of a hypothetically longer fic)

Just Batman (and other DC characters)

Superbat Ship: featuring Batfam Fluff.

Jason can see through the fourth wall (short, more of a prompt than a post, and a continuation of the AU from an above DPxDC post.

Batfam tries to steal the watchtower (based on art!!!)

Matchmaker Tim Drake (again, more of a prompt)

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Hero Swap (Based on ART!!!)

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Bruce wearing his kids merch (short)

Clark Kent covering Bruce Wayne's drama

Superbat ship stuff (Short)

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Gravity Falls: Levity Rises - the portal incident.

Just Danny Phantom: Jazz dealing with trauma (a bit of a character study, based on art)

Danny Phantom x BNHA crossover: Jazz and Nedzu meet.

BNHA: All Might and All for One completing to be the best dad. (Plot outline.)

BNHA: Izuku becomes a cult leader. (Plot outline)

[comphetkoncass]

maybe i WILL write that dick+tim, kon+kory fic. for my me.

p1: dick + tim about the similarities b/w kon + kory

"heyyy so i think. kon needs seen for some clone issues. by scientists. but he cant get past the doors which is WEIRD since he used to LIVE in cadmus itself, even after being freed from the tube. kory has some trauma about being experimented on too, doesn't she? with her starbolts? how do you get her seen?"

"okay. first of all, i recommend the fortress of solitude for anything to do with kon. even STAR labs recently fucked him over, i would seriously not put him anywhere run by human scientists."

"...ah." (star labs being what kicked kon out into gemworld for like 2 yrs and then sent him right back in rebirth)

"second: kory does best when she has a clear exit strategy and the freedom to leave at any time. she'll never do anything more intense than local anesthesia and i'll bet kon's the same."

other notes about this scene: they're for sure on a mission and mowing people down while they talk. <33

p2: kon + kory about the similarities b/w dick + tim

"kory. how do you do it. how do you date a bat without losing your fucking mind. we're literally not human, how do we have a better scope of human limitations than they do. what the fuck is wrong with them."

"what did tim do this time?"

"he almost died then sat back up and kept giving orders instead of letting me take him back to HQ to get patched up. he literally almost bled out. what the fuck. what the FUCK."

"ah... yes, that is a very 'bat' thing to be concerned with. the real issue will be if he does not speak with you about it afterwards. ...how are your persuasion skills?"

p3: dick + kon meeting for kon to ask about the human perspective of science-fiction-soap-opera-trauma.

aka what level of over-sharing is appropriate in a relationship between a science-fiction-trauma-magnet and a like, semi-normal dude. like, how to be a good partner when you're kind of messed up and there's some star trek level weirdness in your backstory and it's all traumatic. how to not freak out your partner when your life has just been really, really weird.

"uhh... hey. hi. sorry to bug you, i just wanted to ask... and out of full respect for you and kory's relationship, and if you could keep this between just the two of us, and dont tell tim? it's just. i uh. my life has been a science fiction trainwreck. and -- this is no disrespect to kory, but hers has kind of been a lot like mine? just- lab stuff, and belonging to evil people and being related to them too, and having really dangerous powers that we didn't ask for, and-"

"hey. breathe, kid."

"i was just wondering. what it's like from the other side. you and kory seem like you have such a good relationship even despite all the science fiction crap. help a guy out? i'm just so afraid of freaking tim out but i can tell he's freaked out by me not trying to lean on him more, but. give it to me straight, nightwing. as a bat -- as like, a normal dude, does it freak you out to have your partner always involved in some science fiction nonsense? like, should i keep downplaying stuff, or-"

"kon, i'm gonna level with you. bats are not nearly as normal as we seem. at least, not bats with friends. my best friend is a speedster, do you know how often i have to help wally figure out time travel dimension crossing speedforce crap? do you know how much weird, interdimensional gods and monsters nonsense batman helps superman and wonder woman with? i PROMISE you. no matter how fucked up and weird it gets, tim will take it in stride. like- no offense if this is a sore subject but didn't he try to clone you? i love him but he's kind of a science fiction weirdo himself."

p4: tim + kory meeting for tim to ask about partners opening up about more alien stuff.

tim's version of the last chapter -- he's asking kory for advice to how to get kon to open up a little. the things that make kory feel better about sharing even the weirdest and most traumatic science-fiction-soap-opera level weirdness in her life.

"i just have the feeling that kon's holding stuff back because he's afraid i'm gonna freak out on him. i mean, does he know how much weird crap i deal with on a daily basis? the other day he accidentally mentioned the clone plague he had, and got embarrassed like i wasn't literally there, like i didn't remember it after living through watching him get it and recover despite it almost killing him. if he's getting embarrassed over that, how am i gonna get him to open up to me about the weird multiverse shit he's been through lately? please help me, kory, you're my only hope. how does dick get you to talk about space adventures or -- the more... the ones that hurt you more?"

"...let's do this while we're gardening. i think that may help." (intentionally takes tim to a greenhouse with very alien looking creatures) "i find that sometimes it helps to talk about the more... difficult, stranger adventures by changing the scenery. but truthfully, you just have to ask questions and be extremely matter of fact with them. do not mince words, and use the descriptions that he does, unless they're fundamentally offensive, then ask for clarification. if he absolutely does not want to talk of course, don't push, but let him know that you genuinely want to discuss it. that he does not need to be embarrassed, either of the adventure itself or his feelings about it."

"got it. and ... if he does open up?"

"let him speak. if he stalls for a bit, ask questions if anything is unclear, as i know they can be when things are, ah... outside an ordinary human, earthly adventure. but for the most part, let him speak."

its tempting to add a scene abt . like . sa survivor stuff bc both dick and kory would have a lot of advice to give kon. but i think i will keep this relatively lighthearted. that can be a part 2 if im still so tempted

[robinofgothamcity]

♡ lyric: "fuck you and your mom and your sister and your job and your broke-ass car and that shit you call art. fuck you and your friends that I'll never see again."

♡ character: dick grayson / nightwing

♡ pronouns used: she / her

♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / so i lied and got another batfam idea fic. do not slaughter me for it LMAOOO.

patrolling with some of your closest friends was something you enjoyed doing every time the chance appeared. the batman entourage had always encouraged you to live in Gotham but Dick in specific constantly asked you to move over to Bludhaven to give him an extra hand in night patrols. a part of you always wondered if he wanted you as an extra hand or someone he could flirt with as the others claimed.

you befriended the original robin when you first joined the league. Dick was still robin at the time and being under the care of Dinah Lance for so long, the two of you eventually split from your mentors to become your own heroes and while you both had your on and off agains as friends, everyone from Dinah to Garth and Roy had claimed that Dick saw you as more of a romantic partner than a friend.

in your opinion, you never felt that vibe from him. he always seemed like the most he saw you as was a close friend. someone like Wally or Garth. you had saw Dick several times in just a hour flirt his way through situations with a villain or even the way he was around Kori or Donna. in those situations, he would flirt with them nonstop and he had never done that with you.

"where we heading bats? we're all congregated together!" you exclaimed, your hands leaning against the bow staff that Tim had let you borrow as your weapon as he had extras lying around and your weapon of choice was getting fixed by the Bat himself, "we don't think Gotham is going to do anything too drastic tonight so we figured that we could just walk the street together!" Cass explained.

you were standing next to Damian and Dick, the two of them talking nonsense as all of you started to walk in a random direction. one of your favorite bars that you, Jason, and Dick sometimes attended was coming into plain sight and a gut feeling had appeared when you saw someone walk out.

you had been dating your boyfriend for a little over six months. was it the best six months of your life? no. but having him there as someone to comfort you or if you were in the mood for something else, he was a call away. you did have feelings for him; however, the two of you never got the big L word.

as of recently though, he had started becoming a bit more distant. he would never call you back right away, texts were almost non-existent, and he would put off any dates when they were scheduled. a part of you didn't want to believe he would cheat on you as he had never given you those vibes but another part of you wanted to believe that he wouldn't just nearly fall of the face of the earth for no reason.

"hey, isn't that your little boyfriend?" Jason asked, seeing the person now a bit more clearer. you remained silent, eyes fixated on him and the girl he was with. everyone around you stared at you and your boyfriend as you had confirmed it was him and he was about to start making out with the girl he was with, "oh no," Stephanie and Duke murmured under their breath at the same time as Dick started to sweat out of his hands from nervousness.

"you okay?" he asked a bit hesitantly. you didn't respond once again as you knew you weren't able to do much of anything considering you were still in full superhero get up, "I think if I talk anymore than I should, I might start that kill list Jason has always wanted me to start."

Jason in any other situation would have encouraged your behavior but this particular scenario, he could see that you were beyond livid. Damian and Tim gave each other a quick look as they immediately blocked you from running towards them, "don't! you're gonna blow up your cover!" Dick yelled as they pulled you into a random alley.

you continued to struggle in Damian's arms as you had to give it to the little league of assassins gremlin. he had some strength to his teenage body. more than Dick ever had, that was for sure.

"he doesn't have to know I'm this person! give me five minutes!" you tried one more harsh tug as Tim pulled you closer to him, "no! you're not! I think we can all tell that you might actually kill him!" he exclaimed as you came to realize that there was no use. the stupid Bats weren't going to let you go at it with your idiot of a now ex boyfriend.

"everyone go on patrol and tell Bruce why we left," Dick commanded as they agreed, more so Jason begrudgingly agreeing than the rest, "come on, let's get you home. you're in no mental capacity to be patrolling."

the two of you walked away as you pulled off your mask, anger still seething through you, "listen, I'm not even heartbroken. that doesn't matter right now. what's pissing me off is that he couldn't have just broken up with me? do you know how embarrassing it is to get cheated on? of course you wouldn't because you're Dick Grayson but still!" you yelled.

Dick grabbed you by the side and pulled you in for a hug, "it's not your fault so don't start thinking it is. you did nothing wrong," he explained. you sighed, knowing he was right but it still stung that you were quite literally getting cheated on at this exact moment, "what do I do? I can't tell him that I know he's cheating but I'm not going to let this continue to happen," you groaned.

"how many times have I told you to move over to Bludhaven? I could get you a spot in the department I work at and just leave the god forsaken town you're currently at. what's holding you back?" he asked, the two of you underneath a street light as the light casted a glow to your skin, "why is this your only form of advice. I don't see how me leaving fixes me currently getting cheated on."

Dick chuckled as both of your comm links went off indicating that all of your turns at patrol was done. you saw him furiously texting whoever it was on his phone as all of you landed at the batcave. you slumped down on the chair, taking your mask off tiredly as Cass and Jason sat next to you.

"come on, get dressed, we're going to get back at your stupid ex," she exclaimed, patting your thigh in anticipation. you gave them a look of confusion as Jason practically dragged you to stand up, "don't question just get dressed in the clothes you were wearing."

you followed on what they had told you to do and got dressed. you weren't dressed in anything fancy. all you had on was a pair of jeans, a plain colored t-shirt, and one of your most comfortable sweaters. as you slipped on your shoes, you saw Dick and Damian talking to themselves, still fully dressed in their uniforms.

"okay, we aren't actually going to kill him right? I might've wanted to earlier but I don't think that's a great option at the moment," you replied as you and Cass jumped onto Jason's motorcycle. they didn't respond as Jason had drove way past the speed limit to get to where you were earlier tonight, "can someone tell me what's going on!" you yelled as Jason came to a stop.

"we're confronting the idiot, all together. maybe he'll learn his lesson that he really shouldn't be messing with a member of the Wayne family," Cass stated as Jason agreed. your eyebrows quirked in confusion, "as much as I love all of you, your father hasn't exactly adopted me," you joked as you saw the bar in view.

you saw your ex's car in the front as you saw him and the girl inside, drinking and talking. all of you hopped off the motorcycle as Jason didn't even give you the time to follow along and barged inside. you walked in behind him, seeing Jason grab him by the collar of his shirt as Cass did the same.

"what is going on!" he yelled as they threw him on the pavement. you stared down at your ex, anger getting you so badly that your eyes were turning bloodshot red, "oh-hey," he replied quietly as he saw the way you were staring at him. you bent down and swung the hardest punch you could land on his nose as he fell back against Cass's shoes, making her grunt disgust as he fell onto the ground with a thud, "what the hell!" he screamed.

"this is what happens when you're too much of a chickenshit to actually dump me! you piece of shit!" you screamed as you kicked him once more but this time in the back, "who are you two! how did you know I was even here! you don't know the full story!" he screamed to try and defend himself but ultimately failing.

it was now Jason's turn to bend down but instead of hitting him, he opted to spit on him, "don't worry on who we are or how she found out. worry on what we can do to you. her and I in specific," Jason threatened as Cass agreed before she freely kicked him on the back again.

it didn't take long for footsteps to appear in the background as you immediately assumed that it was the police and all three of you would have to start making a run for it, "what's going on?" you heard the very voice of Dick Grayson's Nightwing. you chuckled as you saw your ex sigh in relief, "they just jumped me! do something!" he yelled.

Dick laughed as he turned to all three of you, "what's the situation?" he asked as you smiled, "nothing! we just had a bit of an altercation after I found him cheating. nothing dire or something to alert authorities about," you giggled as you stood on the heels of your feet knowing that your ex was not about to get what he wanted.

Damian who was standing next to Dick nodded, "doesn't seem like anything is going on. we need to check other parts of Gotham. come on Nightwing," Damian said as Dick agreed. your ex who was now on the ground as Cass hit him once again was groaning in pain as he murmured about how useless Gotham heroes were.

"don't bother her again or we will find out and we will make sure the next time your family sees you it'll be six feet underground," Jason threatened as Cass nodded, "or maybe we can bury him alive! never done that before."

your ex remained on the ground as all three of you left the scene. you knew the bar wouldn't have any kind of way to figure out that the three of you essentially jumped him as it was too old and raggedy to have any kind of camera or night cameras. even if they did, a quick call to Tim could have quickly erased the footage. not that Jason would've cared. he enjoyed being on the run.

+

you sighed in relief as you packed the last box in the truck Bruce had rented for you. once all the commotion with your ex settled down, Dick had managed to convince you enough to finally move to Bludhaven. you had found an apartment close to where Dick lived as he offered to 'show you around' even though you knew Bludhaven as much as he did.

"come on, where's that smile!" Dick exclaimed, grabbing you by the cheeks and lifting your smile. you rolled your eyes, smacking his hands away from your face, "stop! now let's go. I don't want to be packing too late into the night and be tired for my first thing at work," you replied as you and Dick jumped inside of the truck.

you saw your old apartment building getting smaller and smaller as you turned to Dick to give him a smile. he returned it as he slyly slid his hand on your thigh and giving it a squeeze. you had no idea what your relationship with Dick would become in the future but at the moment, you had no intention of rushing anything.

all you knew was that maybe you would finally act on the feelings that everyone said Dick had for you. you grabbed his hand, tapping on his knuckles softly as he chuckled before interlacing them together as you saw the 'Welcome to Bludhaven, New Jersey' sign coming into view.

[pandoraimperatrix]

hey Pandoraimperatix, my friend I would like to request sunflower Behave Yourself Make Me for Batcat and Violet Stop staring at me to distract me!" "Oh , I'm not staring to distract you ." for Dickkory.

Sorry for the huge delay, it has been busy lately.

We go back to the Titans AU that only exists in my heart in a time between season one and two in which Trigon is gone, but the core four + Jason are living together as a family and the rest of the adults Titans are... Dunno.

Beware, this is so sugary I’m now dependent of insulin.

--------

It started as a regular game night, and for the first two hours or so it really happened as it should.

Gar was in charge of food, so even though everything in the menu was vegetarian he managed to serve a delicious feast with plenty decadent deep fried snacks that Dick would never approve, there was no cauliflower pizza nonsense and frizzy drinks with real sugar in their composition among the diet options.

Rachel fixed the games, Gar offered, but she dismissed him saying that he had too much a niche taste and Jason would only pick the boring battle ones. Besides, she was better at guessing which kind of game would entertain their family without causing a horrible fight over whom was owing whom rent at monopoly or something.

Jason was in charge of music, because he was the only one of the whole team with a decent taste. Or that's what he claimed.

Dick and Kory were not allowed to have any say in the game night activities, the kids said they were merely invited to join. Dick, being true to his namesake wanted to forbid the whole thing, already thinking of all the many ways a night of fun and games could turn into chaos and disgrace. But when Rachel proposed it, she already expected that from him, and that’s why she asked him right after Kory’s morning flight, so when she entered the room, skin glowing fresh from a sunbath, he seemed to had lost the train of his thoughts, mumbling something incoherent, Rachel took that as a yes and ran with it.

But after all the food was gone the strangest thing started to happen. Stranger than Jason going to bed early instead of throwing a fit after losing three rounds or darts in a row. Dick was worried and even tried to talk to him, worried he was just self-isolating out of frustration, but when he went to the boy's room found him actually reading, that gave him a weird mix of surprise and bittersweet joy over his little brother's evolution. He was better now, and didn't need him as much.

But when he went back to the living room there was only Kory.

“Where are Gar and Rachel?”

Kory took a while to answer because she had just stuffed her mouth with a particular big deep fried veggie dumpling, Dick tried to not fixate too much on how plump and kissable her lips were, but he probably didn’t make a very good job. All those long acting classes with Alfred growing up and now, twenty years and an alien princess after, he suddenly couldn’t hide his feelings. Dishonour on him, dishonour on his bats.

“Could have asked you the same,” she said finally swallowing down, and now it was her elegant neck and the dark path to her cleavage that was catching his eyes. Damn, it should be worrisome how much pull she had over him. It was true that he had a past o falling in love with his female teammates and it usually ended badly, but there was something different about him and Kory. While with Dawn and Babs there was always the shadow of this other man he supposed to be, a better man, and the weight of the expectations he put on himself and that he felt at the time that his exes added to, crushed their relationship.

Kory… Well, even after meeting Bruce last time they went to Gotham to officialise Jason’s situation – and also a move orchestrated by Alfred to meet his new grandchildren – she didn’t change with him. Of course, she didn’t have years of indoctrinating to find Batman the most amazing man in existence,  but even after learning his status, and listening to stories about him, she didn’t look as impressed as people usually did. And for some crazy miracle, she was still very much interested in him, Dick, whom she already knew better than most people, maybe even better than Donna, and enough to know all his worst faults, enough to tell him he was being stupid when he let all his paranoia and inferiority complex make him act out. And she was still there, in love with him.

“Are they coming back? There’s still food.”

“Who’s to say?” she said in a nonchalant tone, as she picked the fallen darts from the floor.

He crossed his arms, eying her with amused suspicion.

“Miss Anders, what are you planning?”

“Me?” she asked over her shoulder. “Nothing at all,” and he didn’t believe a bit, but waited and she straighten up, turning back to face him. “But we don’t need the kids to have fun, do we?”

And he could have died right there, the last thing he’d see was the smile she was giving to him, his favourite, that was in equal measures playful, promising, innocent and very dirty. That picture alone with be worthier than any paradise.

Dick walked towards her, and positioned his body behind hers, framing her hips with his hands. “Depending of the type of fun you have in mind…” he said against her ear after pulling her hair aside.

Kory clicked her tongue in disapproval, but leaned back into him slightly, “Grayson, Grayson, what a naughty mind you have.” She prepared to throw a dart and recoiled when he kissed her neck. “I was merely trying to challenge you for a darts’ competition.”

“Yeah?”

She turned her face to look at him, her eyes glowing so green in the way he learned it meant she was getting aroused.

“Yes.”

Dick let her go and didn’t comment when she let out a disappointed sigh.

“I accept,” he took a sip of his own sugar free pop and regretted immediately because it became flat after being forgotten for so long, “what do I get when I win?”

“Cocky, aren’t we?”

“In time.”

She bended in half unable to hide her giggles.

“You are ridiculous.”

He just pouted.

Kory rolled her eyes in amusement, took a deep breath to calm herself and prepared to throw her first dart.

"Stop staring at me to distract me!" She complained.

"Oh, I'm not staring to distract you."

She threw it and it missed, badly. Dick pressed his lips but wasn’t able to hold his own laughter.

“That’s your fault!” her face was glowing golden, and Dick resented the fact they didn’t get to meet earlier, how had been Kory as a teenager? Was she easier to rile up back then? Nowadays, she was the coolest person he ever met, cooler than Bruce, than his uncle Clark. It was the rarest thing to see Kory act in a self-conscious way, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy this newfound power he had. The power to make Princess Koriand’r blush.

“I’ll be more careful now when you start throwing starbolts around from now on,” he teased.

“I’ll use you as my training target, then” was her comeback.

“I think I’ll be fine.”

She sighed and turned back to him, her hands on her hips.

“Why are you torturing me?”

He gave her his best kicked puppy look.

“We are here, all alone, and all you care about is some dumb game…”

Kory’s face broke in one of her full smiles and she threw the darts without even looking, all of them bull’s eye, and walked towards him, hugging him by the neck. 

“Awnnnn, is that it? Why didn’t you say earlier?”

He let go of his demure stance and in a display of his true intentions hoisted her up by her backside, Kory let out an elated exclamation and adjusted her arms grabbing his face and bringing their lips together.

“Hmm,” he made as she parted from his lips to let him breathe and spread kisses down his neck, “can we really? Won’t they come back?”

“Nah,” she said licking his ear, “I gave them money.”

“Not only she has a very good aim, but she’s also so smart,” he mumbled as he walked them to the sofa.

“Aren’t I a catch?” she said opening her legs to accommodate him after he lied her body on the cushions, and pushed his floppy hair back behind his ear, “aren’t you lucky?”

“The luckiest,” and he kissed her.

[realflyingrayson]

Dick and kory were each other love interest for fourteen years in comics , how fourteen years in this days just a fling until he could be with babs , how people believed this retcons , she was dick first canon girlfriend for fourteen years but now she's is slut , why the writers kept dick with a slut from 1980 to 1994 , the bat writers are just pure evil .

Agree totally with you.

Before giving my opinion I wanna make sure you know that I have full respect for those who ship Dickbabs and I have nothing against the ship or batgirl.

Dick and Kory were supposed to end up together. Facts. There’s a lot of material that Marv Wolfman and other titans’ writers were planning for them including a solo comic for nightwing after his marriage with Kory that would show a lot of their romance. We also have to consider that at this moment Titans comics were REALLY popular even more popular than other superhero teams like justice league so if they did release this nightwing solo comic it would certainly be a success.

However Batman was getting back to the spotlight as well and since people already loved nightwing, bat writers saw that introducing Dick back to batman comics was a big opportunity of pure success. But of course because bAtMaN iS tHe wAy mOrE iMpOrTaNt tHaN tItAnS they didn’t care that titans writers had plans for Dick or about his marriage that was about to happen or about the plans of his own solo comics or about his love interest that had A REALLY BIG IMPACT in his life. They just wanted nightwing back, and guess what? They got him back.

So titans writers had to cancel all their plans, write that Mirage arc that is totally nonsense and makes their characters act against their own virtues (for example making Kori jealous that is completely against her character) and then Raven showing up on their wedding and fucking things up. They had to do all this things to give dickkory a reason to break up so that bat writers could have Nightwing back.

Nowadays for DC is the way easier to keep Dick with Babs since her past is involved to Batman as well so it wouldn’t take him away from Batman comics (even though he became nightwing to get independent and not associated with Batman anymore but they don’t talk about that-). And if you think it is not happening anymore, that DC is not trying to keep Dick by Batman’s side every time I’ll tell you one more thing. There was a third titans movie planned for DCAMU that would focus on Starfire and her storyline showing tamaran and NIGHTWING ASKING HER FATHER FOR PERMISSION TO MARRY HER AS WELL AS HIM PROPOSING, but it was cancelled because they needed a new Batman movie instead and Nightwing back to Gotham. Besides of course titans tv show S2 that was more focused on batfam stuff than on the main characters as well as bringing Barbara Gordon as Dick’s ex to S3 that is Kori’s season.

They try everything to minimize or hide the influence and how much Kori meant to Dick by prioritizing nightwing storylines involving batfam. That justifies why some people, especially those who don’t have any knowledge about why they broke Dick’s relationship with Kori in the first place, see their relationship just as sexual or even call Kori a slut.

Here are a few of the many panels that show that Kori had a big impact in Dick’s life (no matter how much bat writers try to hide it) and that show that Dick doesn’t love Kori just because she’s “hot”:

(If you’re interested in learning more about some topic i mentioned in this text just contact me here or on my Instagram @arts.starshine and I’ll share some of the material I used to write about this topic and all the sources)

[taliaquinn]

Infinity War

A/N     

Hiya cuties, here’s my first one shot. I hope you guys like the new series. Expect more to come. Also feel free to leave comments and asks if you guys are curious they are always welcome :). 

One thing Jason Loved about Gotham was the buildings. They were high. Jumping off of them gave him the adrenaline rush nothing else will.

Although he would never admit it he loved jumping off buildings with Dick. Ever since he was Robin he and Dick would play rooftop tag. Dick, of course, would make it difficult by jumping off roofs and creating some of the best acrobatic tricks.Of course, Jason being Jason didn’t like being shown up. He would try to recreate the stunts but unfortunately, Dick was astronomically flexible, Jason was not.

He would usually end up having to deploy his grapple early.

One very terrifying time his grapple didn't deploy and Dick wound up having to save him. Bruce was of course incredibly pissed off. They wound up having a big blow up and didn’t talk for weeks. Again. 

Dick, however, did end up taking Jason to an amusement park and treated him to ice cream. That was one of the best days ever That Jason could remember. Again he will never admit it.

Right now he was racing against Dickface to get to their motorcycles to meet up with bats and bats the second. Marinette was going to be there, she had zeta-beamed from Paris to attend the meeting.

Tony Stark disappeared in an Alien Ship above New York City. The rest of the Avengers or ex-Avengers were missing.

Batcave,Wayne Manor Gotham City,USA 4:30 a.m

“Sup Marinette, what’s our game plan for handling this??” Jason asked once they entered the cave. Marinette was still in her pajamas unlike everyone else who was in their Gear albeit mask-less.

“I tried calling Peter but according to his aunt and mom he’s missing too!!” Marinette exclaimed. Seriously what was it with that boy and his incessant need to get into trouble. He gives a bad name to bug-named superheroes.  

“Unfortunately we don’t know what has happened to the Stark boys” Bruce responded. Placing a reassuring hand on Marinettes and Tims shoulders. Both were very close friends with the spider-boy.  

“Right now we all need to go to our respective cities or superhero teams and prepare for a possible alien invasion” He continued.

The Bat computer began to beep “Guys I think the possible alien invasion started an hour ago” Oracles voice stated. “Crap for some reason our alerts didn’t respond to the breaches in the atmosphere.” 

“Where?” Batman snapped 

“Wakanda”

“The closest zeta beam is 4 hours away from Wakanda” Dick noted bringing up his wrist computer and listing zeta beam locations.

“Some of the rouge avengers are there already, allegedly,” Oracle noted.

“We won’t be of use, we have to get ready to defend the rest of earth if the fighting spreads, No one leaves Gotham, let's get prepped and split into teams” Batman ordered. 

Bruce was scared, he didn’t want to risk his kids and the last thing he wanted to do was get separated from his kids during an alien invasion.

“The majority of the fighting has decreased and most of the Aliens have been kille- HOLY CRAP the energy signature in Wakanda is off the grid!!” Oracles mechanized voice exclaimed.  Jason was cleaning all of his weapons as well as his “hood’. Marinette changed into all black outfit into some sweats. Everyone else was making sure to get prepped.

For a family worried about an alien invasion they sure seemed to be going about normal. Weirdos. 

Crash. Boom

Jason swiveled around and was startled to See Dick doubling over, Damian was frantic at his side trying to ask what was wrong with him. Crash. Jason swiveled around once again but this time he saw Cass doubling over with Bruce trying to help.

This time it was Barbara's voice that can be heard not her voice disguised as Oracle. “Guys something is seriously wrong,” 

Marinette was frantically trying to take off her earrings. Tim was helping her. Jason immediately rushed over to help Damian with Dick.

‘Grayson Speak Tell me what is wro-” Damian demanded. Jason was occupied trying to sit him up. A glance to the side revealed Bruce With Tim supporting Cass and Marinette. Jason had never seen a look like that on Bruces' face. Pain and worry etched into every crevice on his face. 

“DICK” Jason turned towards Damian's frantic cry. He was horrified to see Dick was Disintegrating. What the hell!?

“Jason” oh. Dick was talking to him and holding his shoulder. “Take care of Dami and the family” terrified blue eyes met Jasons.

“Cease that nonsense Grayson” Damian yelled while clinging to Grayson. Dick hugged him “I’m sorry” Damian lurched forward and he suddenly wasn’t clinging to anything anymore. Damian glanced at his hands wide-eyed they were covered in Ashes, Dicks ashes. Jason pulled him up and took him towards the training area and for once Damian didn't protest.

Cass And Marinette

Bruce was there covered in ash as well staring at his lap. Cass was nowhere to be seen. No. Tim was focused on Marinette, who was disintegrating as well but oddly at a slower pace. Jason immediately knelt next to her. 

“W-whats going on, i-it hu-hurts” Marinette wheezed out. She pushed her earrings towards Tim, Tikki was floating nearby terrified at the sight. No way, she couldn’t lose another one of her Ladybugs.

 Bruce was suddenly there.

“Marinette sweetie hold on hold o-please hold on” Holy crap Bruce was crying. 

Tim was frantically talking to Tikki Jason only caught snatches. Soul stone. Snap.Avengers. Dying. 

He was too focused on his baby sister who was disappearing to listen to the rest. “D-dad no, I don’t wanna go, nonononono, Jace, timmy, I don’t wanna leave” She choked out. With a gasp she finally disappeared too leaving Bruce to clutch at her ashes.

Damian was staring at the sight of his Father clutching at his sister's ashes. 

Bruce's face suddenly snapped up and he took off for a mad dash towards the steps, Tim following closely behind. Damian was too occupied staring at the spot where Dick disappeared. Jason noted that his eyes were watering. 

Take Care of Dami. Oh, screw it. Jason pulled Damian towards his chest and clutched him towards his chest. “Damian it’s okay, it’s okay I swear we are going to be fine, I promise” Damian breathing suddenly hitched and sobs started coming out. Jason couldn’t help it and allowed the water in his eyes to release as well.

Hearing footsteps he looked to the side and saw Tim was staring wide-eyed at the sight as well. Surprisingly Damian reached out and grabbed his wrist to pull him into the sob fest. Jason readjusted his grip to make space.

“Alfred's Gone,” Tim said in between sobs. “Jon, Artemis, Bizarro, Kori, Beast boy, Roy, and a good chunk of the Justice League have disappeared.” Barbara included. Jason forgot she was there. Jason hated himself at the moment. He had to let go of the group hug to go to the monitor.

If Roy was gone, who was taking care of Lian? A quick hack revealed Oliver clutching to a terrified Lian.

A second hack showed a cheerful Jon munching on a snack next to his parents who were busy typing on their laptops in a restaurant Suddenly he gasped and his granola bars fell. Clark immediately jumped up and in a few seconds Jon disintegrated into ash Lois fell after she didn't have anything to clutch. Jason cut the video feed before he looked at Lanes and Clark's reactions.

Damian was suddenly at his side. Jason heard a soft "no". Dang the poor demon brat just lost his best friend and a bunch of his more patient siblings.

Tim was off trying to help Oracle figure out how much of the superhero team disappeared. Thankfully Stephanie was spared the disappearing.

A few more video feed hacks revealed pretty much the same thing. People disintegrating in front of loved ones and even rivals. Friggin Riddler disintegrated in front of a shocked spoiler. This was happening everywhere! People suddenly turning to ash. How bad did the Avengers screw up?

Bruce was distraught. He has just lost 3 of his children all in under a minute. The only evidence left of Alfred was a pile of ashes. Bruce picked up a vase and immediately threw it towards a wall. He started throwing whatever was in arms reach. A red blur stopped him from throwing another vase.

Tikki.

“BRUCE STOP” She cried. “Don’t do this Marinette, Cass and Dick wouldn’t want you to spiral”

“Well they’re all dead aren't they?” He bit out. Bruce didn't care anymore. Screw her. How dare she. He lost so much. That darkness that had receded inside of him was coming back full force. This time he wasn’t sure if they would be able to come back. 

The loss of Dick alone is devastating. He was everyone's favourite brother. Cass was the ultimate overprotective sister, and the one that everyone was extremely protective of. Marinette was sweet and gentle, yet she still had a heart of gold. Both she and Dick were the type of people that made everyone around them fall in love with them. Alfred was his father, he stuck with him for everything

They were all gone.

Please leave notes,comments and reblogs. Hope you all enjoy.

[thegeekerynj]

Short Reviews, when the Big Mouth doesn’t have much to say… Or is trying to get caught up from COVID / Election Overload

An Occasional Attempt to Read, Discuss and Review the Wonders of Comics

By: John Rafferty, cranky old man, and Fan of All Things Comics

Short Takes 

Short Reviews, when the Big Mouth doesn’t have much to say… Or is trying to get caught up from COVID / Election Overload

Legion of Super Heroes 6-10  (DC Comics)

Writer: Brian Michael Bendis    Pencils: Ryan Sook (#6 - 7, 10) Various (8 - 9)   Inker: Wade Von Grawbadger (#6 - 7, 10) Various (8 - 9)

‘You want to be called Bouncing Boy?

Looking at the Memexes, we were considering “The Bullet”.

Bullet?

It’s a projectile that——

No, with me, it’s all about the BOUNCE.

———————————————————————————————————

Can Brian Bendis write everything?

Between story, and downright FUN, this is a great book.  Team books are hard to do well, if for no other reason, because of the characterizations. 

Multiple characters mean multiple personalities, and some of those will always get underdeveloped in relationship to the team, as the writer invariably has favorites  Unless…

What we are seeing with LSH is development of characters from across the spectrum. Every book has development of some of the characters, even if they’re not directly involved in the story. This is a far cry from what you see in other books.

Add to this Ryan Sook’s breakdowns, and Wade von Grawbadger’s inks, and you get a pretty package, all tied up in a big bow. More importantly, this is a story with a legacy reaching back 60 years, and is being truly refreshed for a new audience.

This isn’t the Legion I read in 1967, but it’s damned good! 

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶.5

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Suicide Squad #9 - 10  (DC Comics)

Writer: Tom Taylor  Artist: Bruno Redondo

I have Kord’s location.

Okay. Do you also have the Senator?

Oh, did you want him back for some reason? That spineless mouth-breather championed a law to dump more waste into the sea. Delusional, greedy @#$% thinks he owns the world.

I have some friends reminding him he does not.

———————————————————————————————————

Floyd Lawton, first appearance, Batman #59, June 1950, as the man who never misses.

Floyd Lawton, a man who feels no rereason to continue living, but has no wish to die: who puts his life on the line to save his teammates time and time again, to save his daughter and her mother, all with the wish of dying in a truly spectacular fashion.

Floyd Lawton, who finally finds a reason to live, in the eyes of his daughter, Zoe.

Floyd Lawton. Deadshot. Perennial member of Task Force X, finally earned his pardon.

Game Over.

By all that’s Unholy, Tom Taylor is a hateful SOB! But the man writes a great story!

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶🌶

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Marvel Zombies Resurrection # 1 - 4  (Marvel Comics)

Writer: Phillip Kennedy Johnson   Artist: Leonard Kirk

‘Fine. I guess we came all this way. 

Might as well do something really stupid.

———————————————————————————————————

This sums up exploring the World, any world, during a Zombie Apocalypse. Especially when those with Super Powers have been turned into Super Zombies.

So, we pick up with Peter Parker, Forge, Karla Sofen (Moonstone), Valeria and Franklin Richards, a Flerkin named Chewie, and the reprogrammed Sentinel lovingly called ‘Nana’, moving from defendable place to defensible area, seeking a ‘safe place’. Somewhere they can rest for more than one night… if that is possible.

Always realizing the next tree could be hiding a zombified Avenger, or Defender, or Loved one…

Johnson’s Miniseries is another version of the Marvel Zombiepocalypse, which begs the question, what happens when Zombie Galactus infects your world? Or, more importantly, when it CARRIES the infection to your world?

Leonard Kirk’s art style is perfect for this story, a very dark, visceral style which is a little hard on the eyes, making the reader work for every panel. Yes, it hurts to read, but IT SHOULD! It’s Zombies!

This is worth the read if you can get all 4 issues (the first issue came out in July).

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶

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Rorschach #1  (DC Black Label)

Writer: Tom King   Artist: Jorge Fornes

‘They won’t talk to me. Treating me like I’m a  damn Kindergarten kid. I got twins in Kindergarten. Duane and Dwight. I’m not a Kindergarten kid. 

Jesus Christ. What’d they say to you?

That you’re dying.

Shit.

===========================================================

In 1985, Walter Kovacs died. 

It went unnoticed, but for the few in attendance, for Kovacs died following the Alien Invasion of New York, which, in effect saved the world.

Yet, unnoticed, but for the few, Walter Kovacs became a red splash on the Antarctic permafrost.

And Rorschach, the Crime Hunter, died with him.

Or. did he?

In a world existing somewhere between Watchmen 1985 and Current Multiverses, Tom King and begun a noir-ish tale… Did Rorschsch come back, to foil an assassination attempt, and die in the process?

Did he come back, and fail at an attempt at assassination?

Or, Gentle Readers, is there a whole slew of balls in the air we just haven’t seen yet, that we are going to be expected to juggle deftly, as they drop just into sight?

I can’t wait for the answer!

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶.5

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Justice League #54 - 57  (Death Metal Tie-In) (DC Comics)

Writer: Joshua Williamson    Artists: Xermanico (54, 57), Pencils: Robson Rocha (55 - 56), Inks: Daniel Henriquez (55 - 56)

“Don’t you get it Cyborg? We’re not the Justice League!

We’re the Suicide Squad!

———————————————————————————————————

I have said before I am not a fan of Joshua Williamson’s writing.

Maybe I just don’t like him on the Flash. 

Four issues, each of them a very good story, each building, with some action and humor, to a smash mouth endpoint, that brings us to Death Metal #5.

I have to say, I’m enjoying this run of Justice League, even with the switch of artist teams mid - tale Xermanico’s work os beautiful, right into the valley of the Starros (that gave me giggle fits!) Rocha and Henriquez’s work is very pretty, and a little darker than Xermanico’s, giving a more atmospheric touch to the Antenna of LOD.

I have to admit, they do a mean Kori, as well! Really FIERCE, with a Full Length mohawk!

Well worth the cost of admission, and a strong addition to the Metal storyline.

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶.5

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Nightwing #75 - 76 (DC Comics)

Writer: Dan Jurgens   Artists: Travis Moore and Ronan Cliquet (75), Ronan Cliquet (76)

‘We have to talk.’

———————————————————————————————————

Four words. 

Four words that have ended more relationships than violence.

Dan Jurgens has done a masterful job of tying up the Ric Grayson / Amnesias storyline that seems to have run for nigh on ever… by bringing it full circle to Anatoli Knyazev, the KGBeast.

The artwork in these two issues was pretty, with obvious switches between that of Travis Moore (the Titans / Batgirl pages) and Ronan Cliquet’s Batman / KGBeast pages.

Nicely tied up, completing multiple storylines in two issues. Ready to move forward/

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶.5

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Young Justice  #19 - 20 (DC Comics)

Writers: Brian Michael Bendis and David  Walker   Artist: Scott Godlewski

Red Tomato?

I think he said Tornado, and you know it.

Honestly, he talks so fast, I can’t understand him most of the time.

———————————————————————————————————

Damian Wayne, Robin.  Cassie Sandmark, Wonder Girl. Bart Allen, Impulse. Conner Kent, Superboy. Stephanie Brown, Spoiler. Keli Quintela, Teen Lantern. Zan and Jayna. the Wonder Twins. Jinny Hex, Naomi, Amethyst,

Twenty issues in, and the book is cancelled… or is planned to end. Either way, this is a suck way to do things, DC.

This is a great group of characters. Much better than the roster in the Young Justice cartoon, simply for the diversity. Some heroes just coming into their own, some who have existed for years,  (the Wonder Twins have been around in MULTIPLE iterations since the 1970’s), all helping each other… This was a great jumping in book for pre-teens who weren’t up for all the violence / hyperkinetic action / storytelling of a true adult book.

And, it was FUN!

Bendis, Walker and Godlewski produced a fantastic product every month.

One which is ending too soon. Unless, of course, it is going to come back in a new package… 

Hint, hint, hint…

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶.5

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Amazing Spider-Man 50 - 53  ‘Last Remains’  (Marvel Comics (duh!))

Writer: Nick Spencer   Artist: Patrick Gleason

‘You’re going to love it, Pete. There’s no better feeling in this life — Than being surrounded by those you love.

———————————————————————————————————

So, what are the rules around DEAD Characters returning?

Do they have to be relevant after so many years? Shouldn’t they be, well, driven to do something? Not take more than 50 issues to finally get around to saying…”Bazinga!’, or it’s equivalent?

I must admit, issue 50 is the first issue of a Spider-Man book I picked up, and started to enjoy, until I realized I needed to pick up the LR issues also in order to get the whole story. Didn’t’t we get enough of this in the Shooter Years? 

What about a year and a half ago, when Marvel vowed they would never pull this crap again?? 

I guess they forgot… (Insert comparison to jackass in office here).

Too much work, don’t really care.

Especially when the reveal of who Kindred is happens in issue 50, and Peter finds out in #53… Puh-Leez!

At least it’s not Professor Warren and his Gwen Stacy clone. **BRRRRR** Freakin’ Creepy Old Perv!

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶

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Batman 101 - 102 (DC Comics (bigger DUH!))

Writer: James Tynion IV   Artist: Guillen March (101)  Pencils: Carlo Pagulayan   Inks: Danny Miki   Artist: Carlos D’Anda (Pages 13 - 16)

‘DOUBLE RENT! And you don’t talk to the other tenants! They are good people.

Little Santa Prisca is a community. We live through BANE. We live through JOKER. Don’t blow it up with all your nonsense!

You got it Charlie, No Nonsense. Not Here.

Hey! What’s your policy on Hyenas?

———————————————————————————————————

So, Lucius Fox is one of the richest men in the world. 

Selina Kyle has put the Bat on a One Year Clock to get his stuff together, or she walks.

Clownkiller might be the Bernard Goetz of Superhero Vigilantism (look up the reference, I can’t do everything!), but he goes about proving you can’t keep a good vigilante killer down if he has Google.

Ghost Maker is more than we thought, and knows who Bruce Wayne keeps in the closet (or cave).

Is there anyone in Gotham who doesn’t know who Bruce Wayne is?

Tynion continues to pump out some great product, the stories and characters do not disappoint. Including Grifter as Fox’s ‘bodyguard’ was a nice touch, having him get the drop on Batman, a nicer one.

The art in both books, while vastly different, is simply gorgeous. I want to see more od the team of Pagulayan and Miki, I’m hoping to see their work grow with the storylines.

Next issue, BATTLE Sequences! Should be fun, not that it hasn’t been so far.

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶.5

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Shang Chi  #1 - 2 (Marvel Comics)

‘I have to save my Little Sister!

I have to kill my Big Brother!’

———————————————————————————————————

Only meetings should have agendas.

-Me, just now

Once upon a time, Sax Rohmer wrote stories about the machinations of one Fu Manchu, and his oft overturned attempts to take over the world.

In 1973, Steve Engelhart and Jim Starlin brought Shang Chi, son of Fu Manchu into the Marvel Universe, where he and his MI-6 partners Clive Reston and Black Jack Tarr were responsible for being the monkey wrenches in the machinery of Fu Manchu’s Plans.

It seems that Shang Chi is back, without his prior father. He is still proficient in all forms of martial arts, but now, he is ‘Champion of House of the Deadly Hand’ (like that name isn’t going to come to but him in the butt like a Karmic werewolf), and since the passing of his ‘Father”, now the Commander of the Five Weapons Society.

The artwork is pretty, and the story, steeped in Asian Mysticism, is a little draggy so far. Is the story good? Yeah, it’s a nice reminder of a character I exjyed a long tome ago.

Will it get better? Time will tell.

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶.5

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The Rise of Ultraman #1 - 3 (Marvel Comics, by way of Tsuburaya Productions)

Writers: Kyle Higgins and Matt Groom    Artist: Francesco Manna

Oh. You’re here to fight because you think we’re one of the species that can’t evolve.

No. I know you cannot evolve.

Fifty-Four of your years ago, my brother came to assist you. And you killed him.

———————————————————————————————————

In the late 60’s, on certain New York television stations, the Saturday Afternoon hours were filled with Japanese imports, Kaiju - United Science Patrol, and of course the story of the death of Moroboshi, and the coming of Ultraman.

Ultraman, a human - alien symbiosis, who fought the Kaiju menace coming to take over the Earth.

Forward to 2020, a new Ultraman, with a new team of USP helpers / friends, and what looks at this point to be a corrupt system surrounding them.

This creative team has done a marvelous job with the material thus far, reviving this character for a modern reader.

It’s just a shame it’s only 5 issues…

It is definitely worth the read.

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶🌶

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American Vampire 1976 #1 - 2 (DC Comics)

Writer: Scott Snyder   Artist: Artist: Rafael Albuquerque

‘DAMMIT! Before what happened with Gus, you were the best vampire tracker and killer around. I’m asking you to help me take down whoever this PEELING MAN is.

But if this shitty music and LASERS is your life now, then just say so, and I’ll leave you to it.

It’s not a laser, you goddamned idiot.

It’s a SOLAR LAMP. **klik**

———————————————————————————————————

Ten years ago, Scott Snyder, Rafael Albuquerque and Stephen King started a journey which has spanned 10 Years in real time, but 200 years, and 12 separate cycles in series time.

The current iteration has our favorite group of vamps and exterminators running around 1976, wrecking discos, trains, and graveyards, all in the name of bringing back Stoker’s primary villain.

Snyder proves again he is up to the task of creating a world of whimsy and horror, providing mayhem, madness, and the occasional snorting giggle. His droll wit, and ability to write a phenomenal action piece makes this cycle of the American Vampire story a must read.

Out of 5🌶        🌶🌶🌶🌶

[whetstonefires]

Hey so random ask but, I see a lot of people calling Tim drake sexist, I personally don't think he is but what are your thoughts on that.

Oof. Okay.

Technically I can’t just say he’s not, because as the product of a sexist society he, like any other dude and to a lesser extent any person, has got some passive sexist attitudes baked in there.

It tends to surface in things like, when he went on that first big solo adventure when the Robin comic launched, that started in Paris? And he wound up hunting King Snake with Lady Shiva and this one rogue federal agent, a black man, and he got very decisive. Shiva says something cutting about white men, and she has a point, in that if either of his adult companions of the moment were also white men Tim would probably have been somewhat more conscious of the fact that he was thirteen.

That unconscious prioritization that DC’s sexist narrative tends to favor? That is sexism, and also racism, and it’s valuable to draw attention to it, though not, I feel, to blame it all on Tim because quite often he hasn’t actually done anything, the universe around him has just colluded to make him look good.

(Of course this doesn’t happen much anymore, but back when he was the Main Character it did. Comics is a sexist community in a sexist culture, so of course Tim got some of that muck on him.)

But most of the accusations you see going around are about tearing him down on Steph’s behalf, and that’s...murkier.

Because honestly Tim is less sexist than most of the men in his profession. Significantly less so than Bruce or Dick. I literally cannot imagine Tim talking about a loved one the way Dick used to talk about Kori, or a new acquaintance the way Dick did a lot of the one-episode women from his ‘90s Nightwing solo series. He wasn’t bad to them exactly, he was honestly very normal and probably above average, but the incredible, controlling arrogance and casual sexualization is still hard to get through, sometimes. Almost more so for how much more it comes out when he’s talking behind their backs. And Bruce...well, Bruce and gender is an entire deal I’m not going to try to unpack here.

And I cannot see Tim ever using ‘girl’ as an insult, the way Damian does.

Tim’s interactions with the ladies on Young Justice, for example, tended to be a lot less emphatically gendered than Dick’s interactions with the ladies of the Teen Titans, or even Bruce’s in the Justice League, though there are fewer women there and less casual interaction.

And to a considerable extent this was because the passage of ten years had modernized writing norms, and to a considerable extent this was because his demographic was younger than the Titans and therefore less sexualization was expected of the writers. Young Justice built on some stuff Marvel had been doing with young teams and broke some ground that Marvel has built on even further lately. (Seriously what is with Marvel’s young team books lately they’re incredible.) But there was also that Tim as an individual cares less about gender than most of his family.

(In some ways Jason may care even less, but he also leans really hard into performative masculinity and thought flirting was a reasonable way to interact with older women as a teenager, and he’s been being written by Scott Lobdell for ten years even if I have a hard time thinking of that as canon, so his data is mixed.)

Or take the case of this young freedom fighter (/terrorist) who happens to wear Robin colors, who Tim meets at one point in Europe. Dava. The story creates situations where Tim gets a weird mind-altering stimulant transferred orally to him by Dava, and then from him to Shiva when he’s giving her CPR, and Tim rather notably doesn’t have a single narration box or speech bubble that treats these as ‘kisses’ that he has somehow benefited from obtaining.

Later he crawl-drags Dava’s knocked-out-by-Shiva body out of the middle of the bloodbath Shiva is now staging, because he’s in no state to do anything to stop it, which he hates, and while this is certainly the comic arranging things to put Dava in a damsel status relative to Tim, Tim does not at any point frame it that way.

He is really good about not disrespecting Dava, honestly. It’s an interesting storyline partly for that reason, though it’s not the only time it comes up.

Tim was constantly meeting Troubled Young Women who could kick his ass and whom he respected considerably in most senses, but whom he was able to convince that their particular approach to violence was somehow flawed and needed to be re-thought. Thereby allowing there to be Strong Female Characters but keep the balance of the world in order and not worry the readership, by placing the male lead in a subtle power position even if he had gotten his ass kicked.

It was like. An entire genre. Tied to the way Shiva kept popping in as Incredibly Terrifying Supporting Cast.

This was a major way DC was using female characters in and immediately after the 90s and tbh in some ways it was more progressive than what they tend to do now, even as certain parts of the framing set my teeth on edge.

(Compare ‘Tim on drugs manages to hit Shiva hard enough to take her down because she didn’t expect lethal force from him so he has to do CPR’ to the more recent Red Robin story where we spend a couple of pages with him laying out to her face how she came to town to fulfill a contract on him but he brilliantly out-thought her and she ate the drugged chocolates he sent her so He Wins. Bleh.)

Steph stands out for hanging around instead of being a one-off appearance, and for not really rethinking her life in response to Tim much at all, while also not being a villain.

The crux of the issue is, Tim slid into talking down to Steph on a semi-regular basis, especially when trying to get her to stop vigilante-ing, which he’s getting backlash for some twenty-odd years later, mostly by people blaming him for her narrative deprioritization because it’s more satisfying than blaming DC.

And a major form this takes is declaring him generally sexist.

And the thing is, I’m sure his unconscious view of himself as more competent to make judgment calls because Main Character Demographic did play into the way he approached those conversations! I have never met a dude with any self-confidence whatsoever for whom that wasn’t a factor. Sexism, like racism, is the air we breathe, you have to actively extricate yourself from it and even then it will crop up at odd moments.

Classism played into it, too--especially once he knew she was a C-list villain’s daughter; there was that sense that often crops up in Batman properties that not only does greater access to resources make it safer and less self-destructive for the moneyed class to go vigilante-ing, noblesse oblige means it’s also somehow more just. The old ‘the outsider has a more objective approach’ canard. This was even more subtextual than the gender stuff, but I’m sure it was there.

Intellectual elitism is sort of a subset of both that and gender issues--Tim knows he’s smart, it’s the core of his pride, and Steph is not as smart in the same ways and has not had the same educational opportunites, and there are definitely moments of high-handedness tied to this.

And then there was the territorial aspect; it was official Bat policy to discourage all other Gotham vigilantes, usually in a much more absolute and commanding way than Tim ever tried, not to take them in and train them.

That might have been an option for Bruce if he’d wanted to, but it wasn’t really on the table for Tim unless he wanted to stage an intense campaign to totally disrupt his own life in order to bring this person who introduced herself by hitting him in the face with a brick after he mistook her for a villain into private Bat training and spaces. They’d known each other for a while and been having this argument in various forms most of that time, before they ever dated.

Please also remember that the last time Tim wanted to take a troubled blond under his and Bruce’s wings and show them the ropes and make sure they could do this safely as part of a personal healing process that would help everyone, that person took less than a week after starting to show signs of instability to have a complete psychotic break, beat him into the ground, build a brick wall in the Batcave to keep him out, lock down the computers, and start killing criminals with the knife-hands he added to the Batsuit, while failing to prioritize civilian safety.

This was not that long before Steph’s debut. If I were Tim I would not trust myself to sponsor further new team members either!

All of these things besides the Azrael trauma are directly from Bruce, who is often way more emphatic and more of an ass about them. Robin was mirroring Batman (consider the way he talks to Selina sometimes egad, sometimes it only doesn’t look awful because she’s playing along) and following Bat-policy; it is totally nonsensical to hold Tim accountable for this and not Bruce.

It’s also important to note that Tim wasn’t significantly less condescending to Anarky or the General, who were white guys around his age with roughly his class background whom he was trying to talk out of villainy, and honestly Lonnie’s motives were baller. (The original Anarky was a hacktivist based on a design somebody drew up for the third Robin, but Tim got made instead.) Tim’s entire character design back to his first appearance holds that when he’s trying to talk someone into something he tends to fall into a lecturing approach.

This can be very annoying! The first time he did it to Nightwing he got grabbed and shaken and snarled at. And of course it’s worse when he’s talking down a demographic slope, rather than up one.

I am very aware of how fucking annoying it is when guys do this, even if it is their normal mode of interaction. I have come very near to punching faces over it, when it’s really bad.

Tim doesn’t usually approach that line, but the problem is his writers didn’t seem to know the line was there, so if you’re reading some of his interactions with Steph from the perspective of having that chip on your shoulder already, especially if you’re not immersed in the narrative’s assumption that he is The Main Character, especially now that language norms have shifted slightly so wording that was considered neutral in the 90s is now obnoxious, it can ironically make a deeper impression than the much more blatant and decided sexism going on all around him.

So that’s my take on the situation. Tim has some mild passive gender prejudice which he has never taken enough notice of to seriously compensate for, made more visible by being in a deeply sexist world and by being kind of an annoying person sometimes, and this has been blown wildly out of proportion by people who feel that he and Steph are in competition to be The One Who Was Not An Asshole in that relationship.

This is not a winnable competition. They were both assholes sometimes, and even if you could prove Tim was a terrible boyfriend/person it wouldn’t validate all of Steph’s behavior--she was often forced to behave very badly or stupidly, because back then one of her major narrative functions was as a stick for the writers to hit Tim with.

And the thing is. If you’re going to exculpate Steph of awful behavior because it was ‘just’ the writers being sexist, let alone let Dick off the hook on similar grounds, I think it’s really unfair and messed up to then turn around and hold Tim-the-individual accountable for sexism that mostly wasn’t even situated in him so much as baked into the narrative, though to his benefit.

Like. When sexism (or other -ism) benefits people in real life it can be useful to draw their attention to their systemic advantages if they seem not to get it, but drawing Tim’s attention to his narrative prioritization would be extraordinarily meta (lol somebody write that fic). And in neither situation is it productive or fair (though I do know it is so so tempting) to treat the very existence of someone’s privilege as an offense they have personally committed.

They literally cannot help that. That’s how systemic works.

[unboundpen]

Pandemonium [1/3?]

[Next]

Fandom: Batman

Characters: Jason Todd, Damian Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth

Pairing: JasonDamian

Rated: T

Warnings: Damian is aged up, should be in college.

Summary: 

After being away from Earth for a while, Jason notices that Damian is a lot more attention-grabbing than before. Eh, growing attractions are nothing....Right?

Read on AO3

A/N: So it’s been many years since I’ve truly sat down and finished writing a fic. Life has been hectic, I lost my mojo to continue writing, then went back to school and it pretty much consumed my life. Anyways, this was written based off of what @batboys-batboys-whachu-gonna-do had posted almost a year ago and I caught wind of it. It’ll be two or three chapters depending on if I’m up for writing smut with this fic. I said I was going to write something and then went MIA again. Anyways comment on ao3 or send me an ask or reblog with reactions if you guys enjoyed it. I’m very rusty, so go easy on me.

Jason isn’t even sure if he should be out patrolling Gotham tonight. He’s so dead tired that he feels himself get heavier on the cable he’s currently swinging on. Kori had landed the ship back on Earth the night before and if he were to be completely honest with himself, he should have just stayed in bed. The idea of sleeping for a few years before even thinking about getting back into normal everyday crime fighting was really starting to seem like the better option. And yet... here he was, swinging from building to building, looking out into the city he always called home.

Exhaustion crept heavily through his body. It made his vision blur and had been severe enough to make him go cross-eyed a few times. He scrubs at his face, trying to chase the fatigue away as he second-guesses his decision to patrol tonight -feeling the worn leather of his gloves rub against anywhere not covered by the domino mask. It had been a slow night anyway…but just as he reaches out to shoot another line to change his path back to the designated safe house for the night, he hears the very distinct but familiar sound of people getting beaten up in an alley.

Jason follows the sounds of muted groans and painful hits landing -and then sudden silence- until he drops down to the scene of unconscious baddies being zip-tied by another mask in the shadows. He surveys the destruction and lets out a low whistle while toeing one of them by the leg.

"Guess you didn't need any backup."

He hears a familiar snort, "I hardly ever do. It's only five men."

Jason looks over at the figure in the shadows and watches as they stand up and walk over to him. His eyes widen behind the mask.

There stood Robin in all his Robin-y glory. His eyes rake over Robin's form, noticing that the uniform had been adjusted to fit not just his height but also the lithe bulk he had also gained. It reminded him of a certain acrobat they both knew. It was close but not quite. He would have thought this was someone else who had taken on the mantle, but the same minute details were there: hooded cape encasing his head, sword, and sheath at his side, and the ever useful and painful clawed spikes that protruded from the kid's gloves. Not to mention the air of annoying haughtiness that only came from being the direct heir to Bruce Wayne.

"I gotta say, you certainly shot up from the last time I saw you." He feels his lips stretch into a grin.

"-Tt- It was inevitable."

"Nonetheless," Jason pauses to do another slow look, "you look good for someone who is supposed to be suffering through puberty."

"Considering my parentage, it has come as no surprise." Robin answers simply before reaching into his belt for a few more zip ties and holds them out to Jason, "Make yourself useful, Hood, and get those two."

Jason blinks, taking the offered items unconsciously. He half expected the kid to react a bit differently, maybe even get a little flustered. Jason certainly thought so.

Jason frowns in contemplation as he maneuvers one of the thugs in front of him onto their front, restraining the unconscious man with one of the ties before moving onto the next one. He hears the faint sound of bodies being dragged into a pile.

"So, what's a birdie like you doing in my neck of the woods anyway?"

"You were gone-"

“-Well, no shit," Jason interjects, shaking his head. Again reminded of how tired he really was. He looks over at the other mask currently frowning at Jason and arms crossed.

"You were gone," the other mask emphasizes loudly, as if admonishing Jason's interruption, "henceforth I took it upon myself to patrol your area until you got back."

"I guess no one told you I got back yesterday?”

“On the contrary, Father already has a written report of your return in the system."

Jason sighs, “Of course he has,” he opts to rub his eyes through the mask, "Guess I tripped the alert system he has over my known locations?”

“Actually,” Robin pauses, tilting his head to the side as the sound of sirens faintly begin to sound around them and then reaches up to shoot a line up one of the buildings.

Jason watches him glide up through the air, admiring the fluidity of the movement before he follows. Once he lands next to the bird, Robin continues, “Superman alerted father of your return.”

Jason grunts and crosses his arms thoughtfully. That wasn’t a surprising thing either. Clark had always been watchful of him even while he was still wearing the cape and green panties. Even the thought that the super could be listening in on their conversation caused a shiver to run all throughout Jason’s body. Before he could even say anything, Robin moves to the other side of the building without another look at Jason.

“I trust you have the rest handled from here, Red Hood,” Robin says flippantly over his shoulder. The older man watches silently as the Robin turns around, gives him a nod, then hauls himself over the raised concrete and over the other side of it.

And with that Robin is gone, leaving no trace of himself except in Jason’s mind.

xXx

It’s about four days later before Jason feels himself get comfortable with his place in Gotham again. He’s well rested now, but he realizes with the year or so he’s been away, his files aren’t up-to-date. It was one thing if a few robberies occurred here or there, but when he’s heard of several incidents involving a certain mob boss who had been steadily moving into his territory, he figures he needs to get on that asap. He doesn’t rely too much on the other members of the bat family, but he would have expected that the files would be constantly updated while he was away. It was most likely that Tim was more busy with the Titans and Babs was preoccupied with other things. Thus he finds himself parking his bike in the bat cave.

If there was one thing that Jason expects to not change significantly, it would be the cave. The same old giant penny and t-rex were in their respective spaces. The only things ever changing were all the tech that got recycled every now and then. He surveys the area, noting that he was the only one there in this moment. He makes it a point to himself to ignore the glass case holding a certain uniform.

Jason strolls over to the computer, booting it up and realizes that the program was updated when the screen prompts for a password. He decides not to risk it as the memory of the last time he tried to flashes up in his mind.

The ink had stained his skin for weeks….

He wonders who is in the manor for a moment before he feels a presence at his side. Jason is a bit too surprised to even move away as the figure types in the password, a nonsensical password that would have been impossible to guess. And before he could stop himself, his eyes roam.

“Someone needs to put a bell on you,” he states absentmindedly.

Damian…looked really good. A short-sleeved, white, button-up shirt snug around his shoulders and upper body as he was crouching over the control panel. His head was looking up at the screen, neck stretched invitingly while watching it. Jason’s eyes slide down until he reaches the jeans that fit very nicely on Damian’s legs, enveloping his thighs and….

“-Tt- I anticipated your visit.” Damian types on the keyboard for a third password and then turns his head to stare back at Jason, “I updated the system for better security as requested by father while you were away.”

Jason feels his eyes still linger on the brat’s ass before looking up to meet Damian’s eyes. Oh boy….

The older man clears his throat; it was just dry all of a sudden. Hopefully, the kid didn’t catch him staring too much. "Three passwords is a bit much, don't ya think?" He utters weakly.

Damian shrugs before straightening up, and Jason catches himself staring harder, to the point of his eyes crossing. He shuts his eyes for a moment and opts for making a show of rubbing his forehead as if he was exasperated by the nuisance.

“Alright, well, I should probably be put in the system again. Gotta catch up on what I missed and all that.” Jason waves his hand as he opens his eyes.

Damian hums thoughtfully. “That will not be difficult. However, I’m not sure if father has granted permission to give you access.”

The older man chokes out a laugh, “Oh Babybat, I get access one way or another. I only get locked out when shit like this happens. And last I remember you’re not one to ask for daddy’s permission on a lot of things.”

The younger man's eyes narrow while his lips morph into a frown.“I am not," he answers, "I-It’s a compromise for allowing me to patrol by myself. Besides, why should I believe that you’re allowed in the system?”

Jason grins. This wouldn't be the demon spawn if he didn't give any push back. “The replacement can vouch for that. And I got some downtime so if you really need to ask Bruce for the go ahead, I can stay here in the meantime and catch up with what I really need.”

“That will not be necessary, Father is predisposed at the moment. Getting any sort of response from him will not come till much later tonight, most likely a few minutes before he arrives back here,” Jason opens his mouth to say that wasn’t really a problem but Damian continues, “I have a meeting with a colleague in an hour. Thus leaving you here in the manor by yourself is not a wise choice. I can give you the files that you need -that is if you have a USB drive on you.”

Jason can’t help but feel a bit offended from that.

“Okay first,” Jason points a finger at the kid, “I can very much well click and drag files onto a thumb-drive just fine. Second, I’m pretty sure I can handle myself if I were alone. I’ve been managing that for the past few years now thank you very much. Third, wouldn’t Alfred be here anyway?”

Damian snorts and allows himself to lean on the control panel. And by God, if Jason doesn't feel his face heat up even more as he tries to maintain eye contact. “Getting the files is a bit more convoluted than that, Todd. Pennyworth has the day off. And I was very much alluding to this incident.” He reaches down to press a button -just one, Jason notices- without looking away before the screen flickers to the start of a video.

Jason looks up and realizes just what incident he was talking about once the sound echoes through the cave.

A much younger Jason balanced on the banister of the staircase, on the second floor, dressed in the Robin uniform, green panties, and pixie boots and all, while reading a few lines from Peter Pan out loud as he walks from one end to the other.

“I thought I deleted this.”

Damian tuts, “You know very well that my father had installed a program to reverse any erasures. He may be aware of this or he may not, but I am not the only one that knows of this video’s existence.”

Was he-? Holy fuck the kid was smirking. He definitely had this on retainer.

Jason glares at him.

Damian pauses the video and presses another button which causes a red circle to appear on the screen. “Cain mentioned that you start to get pretty confident with yourself here.” Damian presses play again and then pauses it at another point in the video. “She also said that this was where your balance starts to go off, and I’m inclined to agree."

“Who else-“

“-Brown commented that you get a little pitchy here.”

The video continues to play out and then Jason watches his younger self start to fall and struggle for the grappling hook on his belt and shoot it at the other end of the room.

“Drake stated that you should have been able to get to it quicker,” Jason continues watching, remembering the feeling of relief when he landed…until the chandelier fell with the loudest crash he’d ever heard in his life behind him, and now he is reliving that moment as the chandelier drops and breaks on the screen.

“And Alfred said that you had a difficult time cleaning up the thousands of pieces even when he got back home,” Damian pauses and then raises an eyebrow at him, "Really, Todd, a broom?"

“I couldn’t find the vacuum,” Jason growls out, feeling his face heat up even more now, but this time with begrudging embarrassment. He can’t even remember the last time he was this mortified and it was the kid -out of all people- that was teasing the hell out of him.

Damian seems to accept that answer for what it was and lets it go while still smirking that goddamn smirk.

And this is where Jason isn’t sure if he is angry, embarrassed or ...turned on? All three maybe? But he knows for sure that he was confused as hell at the turned on part no matter how small it may be. He’s gotta process this somewhat. And it’s a bit difficult to when the damned kid was standing right there.

Without another word, Jason turns and stalks towards his bike, resisting the urge to run to it.

“I didn’t take you for one to run away, Todd,” Damian calls out to him.

Jason shakes his head as he straddles his bike and flips the kid off before he starts it and heads back to his apartment.

xXx

It’s early in the morning and Jason finds himself laying on the rooftop of his apartment staring up at the starless sky, having smoked through one full pack of cigarettes and working his way through a second. He’s been done with patrol for over an hour now, so both the helmet and mask were off to the side...somewhere.

He closes his eyes as he takes an extra long drag of the lit cigarette held between his fingers. When he opens his eyes, there’s Robin standing over him with a frown.

“I find it hard to believe that you still smoke, Todd.”

Jason rolls his eyes hard as he takes another drag, “Oh look, Boy Wonder has come to save me from the perils of smoking."

Damian shakes his head before he holds out a fist over Jason and drops something onto the older man’s torso. Jason takes a hold of it in his other hand and brings it up to his field of vision.

A thumb-drive.

“The hell is this for?”

“You left before I could give you the files.”

“How do you know what files I needed?”

Damian sighs, “You are merely predictable when you need to be, Todd.”

“I’m hurt,” Jason mocks, throwing his hand over his chest and contorts his face into a pained expression. He half expects for Damian to just leave then and there, but is surprised when the kid opts to sit next to him. Jason turns his head to look at the kid and muses that he looks a lot smaller from this angle, almost like his eleven-year-old self with that scowl on his face.

"Father gave the go-ahead," the kid's scowl deepens when Jason blows another cloud of smoke up into the air, "for your access to the database."

The older man grins, “Told ya.”

There was a brief pause where Jason just continues to stare up at the sky peacefully. He can feel the kid’s eyes study him in a curious manner, no weight to it. He had to admit, it was nice. Typically when a bat clan member looked at him there was the usual range of emotions behind the gazes. With Dick, there was worry along with his need to use touch as comfort, often with a tentative hand that locked onto Jason’s shoulder. Most of the time it was heavy. Babs looked at him with a stoic expression but with the occasional fleeting recognition whenever he said something witty enough for her. To her, the rough around the edges but hopeful youth that he used to be was long gone, and in his place an almost stranger. Tim had just this hint of pity behind his mask of smiles. After forming a civil relationship that bloomed into this comfortable companionship, Jason had figured out that whatever Tim had researched on the older man would always be in the back of his mind.

And then there was Bruce. The head honcho. While Jason could say that their relationship was significantly better, he still couldn’t be around his old mentor for no more than an hour at most. There was only so much Jason could take from the disappointment behind that gaze. After those years when he was a teenager and the glinting amusement that Bruce looked at him with, he just could not stand the feeling of failure digging into and burrowing under his skin where it just spread throughout his body like an itching rash, getting worse with every minute till he felt like he could start to hyperventilate.

But then here was the son. At first, it was all just anger. Man, the kid was a tight ball of fury that tried to get at anyone that moved near him. Yeah sure it was annoying when it was aimlessly directed at anyone, but the intensity. He was actually impressed with how much the kid’s anger fueled him to do just about anything. And Jason had tested it with his goading, just to see how long Damian would last and just how far he was willing to go. Jason knew that feeling. He was familiar with it after he had crawled out of the grandfather’s pit. It was the only emotion he could latch onto that could keep him grounded. So he understood Damian’s confusion fueled rage. But now, even before Jason had left for a year, Damian’s looks had evolved into a feigned indifference, all just with the intent to study Jason more. If Jason were to pick anyone out of the bat clan, Damian was the least volatile on his psyche.

He feels Damian shift beside him for a moment before the kid sighed. “It would be a lot easier for me to give you access to the database if you let me into your apartment, Todd.”

“You could always just go in through the window.”

“That would be rude of me.”

And this is where Jason slowly turns his head so he can slow blink at the whites of Robin’s mask. They stay like that for a moment, neither of them moving. The older man waits, just wants to see if Damian knew how ridiculous that statement was coming from him of all people. But it never comes, just the blank look on his face. Jason feels like laughing in disbelief but opts for throwing his half cigarette to the side before reaching up to rub his face to keep his mouth from opening up to let out the bubbling of a laugh that was forming in the back of his throat.

Jason resists the urge to groan, the way that every aging adult does when they have to get up, as he shuffles slowly to his feet. He contemplates asking Roy for a long needed body cracking as he glances down at the kid, who was still sitting there.

"Come on then," Jason simply says and starts walking towards the fire escape.

He hears shuffling behind him. "What about your helmet?"

"Eh, I'll come back for it later," Jason responds as he starts to climb down the three floors before his apartment.

xXx

The cool breeze billows around Jason as he takes a single sip from the mug that had been set in front of him about 20 minutes ago. He scans the street lazily, knowing that the passing bell for the university would ring any minute now. He's not too sure why he's waiting for the kid, there was no emergency to the situation, he just felt drawn to approach him on his downtime.

The melodic sound of the bell rang throughout the air and almost immediately, students pour out of the entrances. Jason makes no rush to get up immediately. With the amount of kids coming out, it would be a lot more trouble to look for Damian now than it would after the crowd thins out in the next 10 minutes. And true to that prediction, the courtyard of the school is nearly empty as if there was some sort of repellent for college goers, said for a few stragglers. One of them being baby Wayne.

"What's this?" Jason whispers into the lip of his mug when he sees a redheaded woman jog her way to Damian's side. It doesn't take a lot for anyone to see the attraction to the kid. The lack of space between their arms, her big ass smile followed with one dimple in one cheek, and the admiring eyes had trained on him.

Jason couldn't help but think of Dick and Babs. But where Dick and Babs would be easy and open in public, Damian and this girl were...stunted... in a sense. The kid didn't have the puppy love-struck expression of a young adult, instead, he just looked charming. It was eerily similar to the charm Bruce used to work over the ladies at a charity event or something.

He gets up and crosses the street with his eyes still trained on the pair. He'll be honest with himself, it's something he can't really take his eyes off. Like he was watching a car crash. As he gets closer, he starts to hear a bit of their conversation.

"-this weekend?"

Damian pauses, looking thoughtful, then pulls out his phone, tapping the screen a few times. With his head lowered, the few strands of hair not held up by gel fall to his forehead, giving him a much more casual look. However, it's all disrupted when he runs a hand through his hair and looks back to her. Jason would have laughed at the audible hitch of breath from the girl if he wasn't distracted from the same action. "I have a few projects due next week, and then I have to help prepare for the hospital auction on Sunday."

She pouts, "Oh, that wouldn't happen to be the children's hospital, would it?"

"Yes," Damian ponders for a moment, "I believe your mother is on the guest list."

Jason catches her eyes and a bright tinge of pink stains her cheeks as she takes a small step away from Damian. The hellspawn doesn't even acknowledge Jason's presence and continues talking.

"If you attend, I could save you a dance." By god, he sounds sincerely earnest.

"I-I'll try to make it then...then," she blushes even harder, glancing back at Jason, "Bye, Damian." And then she hustles away.

It's almost scary when Damian's face drops into his natural faint scowl, directing it at Jason once she was out of sight

"You could have stayed away for a few minutes longer."

"Wanted to make out with your little girlfriend?" Jason teases, sidling over.

Damian scoffs, waving his hand flippantly, "Her mother is simple-minded. She donates more when she is in a good mood, and Leah attending is a major contributor. It's purely business."

Jason nods thoughtfully. That seems more on Damian's realm of doing things. There was always a motive. It was only natural that the kid would use the all good Wayne charm as another tool.

"So," Damian straightens, "what do you need, Todd?"

The older man mockingly places a hand over his heart, "Hurt, so very much hurt. Can't I just come see my younger bro without needing something?" He fakes wiping a tear from his cheek.

Damian rolls his eyes, "I'm hardly that,” then starts walking to exit the campus, but this time it's Jason that walks beside him.

"Okay let me correct you there. Your dad took me in so I grew up in that manor just the same as you, was fed by the same butler as you and if I had to draw a venn diagram of people we would consider family, " he gave a little air quote motion, "almost all of those people would be in the center."

"That is a very loose yet specific definition for brother."

Jason shrugs, "Yeah but that comes with the job. Anyways, yes you were right I do need something from you."

"What is it?"

"I need you to come work a case with me."

Damian raises an inquisitive brow at Jason, and that's not a good thing right now for the older man. "You could have sent a text or opt to shine an R up in the sky."

"True, but--Did you just make a joke?" And Jason is damned when the kid gave him a wry smirk that made him stumble in his boots. That was an interesting image in his head. Normally, Jason wouldn't think much of it if the kid were in the Robin gear, but out of the mask and with those bright baby blues and in civvies no less. The older man clears his throat and tries to alleviate some of the pressure in his pants inconspicuously as they stopped at the sidewalk. At this point, Jason has accepted that there is somewhat of an attraction to the kid. After that encounter in the Batcave, and furiously rubbing one out one, two, multiple times, it would be hard to deny it.

Jason coughs, reaching up to rub the back of his neck, "Anyways, yeah, it seems like you've taken up my section of the city while I was out, so it'd only make sense to ask you, ya know?"

The kid nods after a moment. "Tonight. I can meet you at one of your safe houses and you can debrief me on what you have in mind."

And just then a car rolls up and comes to a stop in front of them. Damian opens the door without missing a beat and slides into the passenger seat, revealing a familiar face in the driver's side.

Jason grins and gives a two finger salute, "Hey Alfred."

The old man gives Jason a fond smile, "Master Jason. I trust your trip went well?"

"Very."

"I will send you a message," Damian states, leaning over to grab onto the door handle and looking up at Jason through his thick lashes.

Jason's throat goes dry. He's almost sure that he's staring way too hard at the kid, whom to his credit doesn't flinch from it. So all Jason can manage is a quick nod. Then the door closes and watches the car drive and turn around a corner before he realizes that he wasn't breathing.

[why-this-kolaveri-machi]

Fic: Come As You Are (1/11)

THIS IS FINALLY HERE OH MY GOD. 

Summary: A series of codas/tags/missing scenes to every episode of the first season of TItans. In the first episode, our protagonists are moving towards each other, but first, they each navigate the existential nightmare that is their own mind.

Warnings: SPOILERS for the whole series, some swearing, lot of dense parenthetical nonsense and fancy formatting. Dick and Rachel marinate in their own anxiety. I’ve also taken the liberty to fill in some gaps that were left by canon.

this is meant to be a companion series to my episode recap series. i’m in the midst of my worst writer’s block ever--it took two whole months just to write this chapter; i’m still far from happy with it, but if i looked at it anymore i was going to scream--but i hope to finish both the recap series and this fic series before s2 airs this fall. 

(s/o to @cautiousamber whose continued love for the show and for what it's doing delights me always)

Come As You Are

1.01

Strange things live inside Rachel’s head.

When she was little, people around her would come to her in her dreams in coloured silhouettes, glowing and wailing, ripped into pieces by monsters that lurked in the shadowy corners of her mind. As she grew, the figures grew more refined, more recognisable, but they never stopped screaming; when she heard words, it was only the monster that spoke.

I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU, RACHEL

The years passed, and the dreams started to leak into the real world: she would see strange, fresh scars on Melissa’s arms while trembling in her arms after another DREAM; hazy, coloured halos followed people she knew and horrible things happened to people she hated; the monster would stare back at her in the mirror now, eyes inky black, leaking venom into her veins. TRUST ME, the monster would say, calm while everybody else screamed, and Rachel, well. After a point, she forgot to scream, too.

Then one night, she dreams of a little boy on the trapeze who watches his parents fall to their deaths, and the monster does something it has never done before: it laughs.

-

“Master Dick, I trust you received the package I sent you last week?”

Dick idly doodles a large ‘R’ on his notepad while wedging his phone between his shoulder and his ear. “I did, Alfred, it came in just this morning. Thanks. I, uh,” he makes the edges sharper, the ends like knife blades, “I should’ve called to let you know earlier.”

“Yes,” Alfred says crisply, “You should have.”

He twists the pad until it looks like the R is in motion, bounding across the page. Two tables over, Detective Oyode flings a casefile onto his desk in disgust. Across the room, Johnson is eyeing Dick with suspicious disdain. The air is heavy with the smell of stale coffee; there’s a lingering whiff of cigarette smoke from the balcony where Carter, Takashi and Mulligan take smoke breaks twice every hour, on the dot. The floor buzzes with steady chatter, the clicking of computer keys and ringing phones. Dick’s active cases tray is screamingly empty.

“I’ve been busy,” he says. “Settling in, and all that.”

“I see.” A pregnant pause. “And I suppose your new responsibilities as a police detective is the only reason you requested that I send over your modified batarangs?”

“Birdarangs,” Dick says, without thinking.

“Ah. Yes.” Alfred’s voice turns fond. “It’s been well over a decade since you came up with that convention, Master Dick; I must confess that it is good to hear it again. More than anything… it is reassuring to see that you haven’t decided to retire Robin altogether.”

A knot of anxiety tightens somewhere behind Dick’s sternum. This is about as secure a line as he can get without actually using the comms in his Robin suit, but it’s still jarring to hear someone just—just say it aloud like that. Especially after—

Dick’s grip on his pen tightens and he scores across the ‘R’ with such ferocity that the nib tears through the paper. Johnson’s put his coffee mug aside and is starting to walk in his direction and if Dick tenses any more he’s sure he’s going to do something he’ll regret. “Sorry, Alfred,” he says. “Something’s come up; I gotta go.”

“Very well, Master Dick. I hope that you will continue to keep in touch.”

“Bye.” He slips the phone in his pocket, gets up, and tosses his ruined pad in the wastebin. He neatly sidesteps Johnson, swipes the abandoned casefile from Oyode’s desk, and hurries out of the precinct.

-

(it’s all right. you’re beautiful.)

Now that (she’s) put some distance between (her) and (her) attackers (hot metal projectiles where there should be nothing but fire, but she can’t—she can’t—), the molten panic that’s been fuelling (her) escape abates, just a little. (She) slows to a walk, pulling (her) coat close.

(it’s cold, but she’s known colder.)

The further (she) walks from the woods, the less desolate it is. There are more buildings here and more people, turning to look at (her) as (she) walks by them. Almost on instinct, (she) turns into a gas station and makes (her) way into the bathroom, coming to a stop in front of a grimy mirror. (She) is all edge and glorious skin, shining and sharp.

(beautiful. you will know it. and more importantly, they will too.)

(She) empties her purse to find documents and keys and a dozen little opaque clues as to (her) identity. (She) is Kory Anders, and the name is both everything and nothing at all. It is everything because it fits, slots into place effortlessly in her mind like she’s known it all along, but doesn’t trigger a cascade of memories, or anything other than flashes of light and bone-deep cold (and unimaginable pain).

No matter. She is Kory Anders, and this is as good a starting point as any. Besides, she is sure that the real her has a taste for adventure.

-

When the fight’s over, Dick changes into regular clothes a couple of dead-end alleyways over and limps back to his car, trying very hard not to think about Batmobiles, or Batcaves, or anything bat-related whatsoever. His shoulders ache with tension and his knuckles feel pulverised—he isn’t quite used to being the ones delivering all the punches yet. There’s blood and glass in his hair and the acrid stench of used smoke pellets lingers around him like a miasma; he’s stuffed his costume and weapons back in the case, but there are still red smears around the lock and—

—he’s not even entirely sure he’s managed to leave the site of the fight clean; or if he’s gotten all the security cams in the alley; it’s been so long since he’s done this and even longer since he’s done it alone—

(All right. Deep breath. Deep breath. Another one. And another one.)

Everything feels even more absurd when, later in the night, he’s stuck in downtown traffic, trying to breathe past bruised ribs and the bite of glass shards in his fingers. It wasn’t supposed to be like this; moving this far from Gotham was supposed to be the start of a clean break. He’d been slowly working up to visiting Wayne Manor one more time (one last time, but he can’t—he can’t bring himself to—) to return the Robin costume, trying to reconcile the memories of safety and comfort he had under Bruce and Alfred’s care with yawning isolation of that gigantic mansion, the stomach-dropping terror that he would be abandoned (again) if he failed (again), and the anger that never seemed to stop simmering regardless of how much he punched, how much he cried, how much he laughed.

Being Robin without Batman feels like something vital’s been cut out of him, but just being Dick Grayson isn’t enough for all the evil in the world.

Dick stumbles into his apartment building, trying very hard not to make carrying a giant silver briefcase in the dark seem suspicious. He enters his apartment—dangerously open to the world but devoid of shadows—and lets himself slump onto the sofa. He’s going to (clean his costume and equipment, scrub the security cam feeds, clean the car of bloodstains and evidence, destroy the copy of Oyode’s file that he’d made, type up a report for his personal log) but for now he closes his eyes and—breathes.

Just—

Just for a minute.

-

The city is drab and cold in ways Rachel is entirely unused to; for some reason, she thinks of old white bedsheets turned grey from use and wear and repeated washing over years and years. Melissa ripped one of them into rags the last time Rachel DID SOMETHING STUPID, knocked over a vase, cut her hand on the shattered pieces, and dripped blood all over the kitchen floor. Melissa’d spent an entire afternoon scrubbing at bloodstains, refusing to answer to Rachel’s tearful apologies. (The voice told her to break the next vase over Melissa’s head, which made Rachel want to vomit.)

Melissa had washed the blood out of those rags as thoroughly as she could, leaving them even more dirty-grey than they were. That’s what the city looks like: wrung of colour, washed and washed again into grey submission—

“We’re here,” the officer in the front seat of the car says, dropping Rachel abruptly out of her thoughts. She’s taken into the precinct and asked to sit inside a windowless room; it isn’t until the officer that’s trying to get her attention touches her shoulder and she flinches, light and sound and terror rushing in, that the numbness abates and the voice snarls KILL HIM!

can’twon’tdon’t—

The officer looks shocked for a moment before his expression softens and he backs away. “Somebody will come talk to you now, okay?” he says, and leaves. Rachel waits and picks at the fraying edges of her sleeves, wishing—not for the first time—that she’d brought her phone along. It’s not like she has anybody to call, really; she just wants something to do that’s not staring at the walls (of an interrogation room, this is an interrogation room) and trying not to think about how desperately alone she is right now.

A few minutes later, Detective Dick Grayson walks in and introduces himself. Rachel jolts at the sight of him; she can hardly hear what he’s saying over the chorus of holy shit! holy shit! that’s taken over her mind, because holy shit—this is the little boy on the trapeze. He glows blood-red, and every movement of his leaves behind smudges of light and colour and life in this otherwise cement-grey room.

She holds his hands, tells him, you’re the boy from the circus; he frowns, but doesn’t tell her she’s crazy, or stupid, or BADWRONGEVIL. Dick Grayson promises to help her, and for the first time since watching her mother fall to the floor with a bullet hole through her head, Rachel feels hope.

-

Kory Anders is on a plane to the United States.

Twelve hours ago, she didn’t know her name; now she not only has an identity, but a destination, a purpose (a mission). Everything from swiping cards to speaking a dozen different tongues to summoning fire to her fingertips to the clean, beautiful effortlessness of throwing an asshole across a hotel room has been… intuitive; she thinks as she does, moves as she feels, learns as she touches. She doesn’t know what she will find when she lands (knows without really knowing that where she is going is both impossibly vast and comically small) but she’s going to start with looking for the girl in the photo and see where that leads her.

(--to a bubble suspended in infinite nothingness, shackles around her wrists and feet—)

And if that means burning up a few more entitled assholes along the way, so be it.

[tessatechaitea]

New Titans #114

This is it! The last regular issue of this comic that I own!

I guess the changing of the guard leaving Arsenal in charge was the last straw for me. Or maybe the last straw was that Pantha's tail hole on her shorts never ripped so that I could see her butthole. One of those two reasons is definitely why I stopped buying this comic though. This issue is called "24 Hours" which makes me think of Gaiman's The Sandman which makes me think, "Why the fuck am I rereading this shit when I could be rereading that shit?!" Oh wait! I actually know the reason for this! It's because these Titans comic books were stored in a big old regular sized moving box that I wanted to get out of the way! Also I've reread The Sandman and I've never reread this. And since I'll be fifty in a little over two years, I should probably get all of the stupid time-wasting bullshit ideas out of my head now. Any writing projects I can't finish by the time I'm fifty, I'm abandoning. At that time, I'll just make up new ones that will only entertain me and a few other people. So if I've ever said anything in passing about something I was going to do, like finishing the Goggles Futures End story or my Fantastickal Fuck-Fighting Books, you'd better get your vote in now! The issue begins at midnight with Changeling getting his ass beat by a dark silhouette who claims Changeling promised to "end her living days." I don't know who that might be or why this is happening. With Zero Hour beginning right around this time, my comic books might become complete nonsense. I just have to hope the comic books involved in that non-crisis-labeled crisis will have "Zero Hour Tie-in" labels on the front. I probably don't understand what's going on in this one because Marv Wolfman is being artsy. And fuck if I know anything about art! I read comic books for a reason, people! At 1:10 AM, Starfire flies around wondering if Earth is really her home. Yes, it takes six panels for her to ask that question. But she's also being artsy in a poetic way! She uses phrases like "scarlet sea" and "delicious nectar" and "golden skies." It's almost as if somebody scoffed at Marv Wolfman when he mentioned he wrote comic books earlier in the week and he thought, "I'll show them!" Then he was all, "Hey! That issue by that new kid Gaiman was kind of artsy! It had those clocks that showed what time it is and the whole thing took place in only 24 hours and it was all filmed in real time although with all the cuts from one character to another, why did it even fucking matter? Oh wait, it's only 1994! I don't know who Jack Bauer is yet!" At 3:36 AM, Pantha breaks into somebody's apartment. Supposedly it's the person who changed her from a person into a cat or from a cat into a person. But it isn't so Pantha gets to scream in existential angst which is the only cathartic release available to those of us who know nothing has any meaning and all of our clothes need to be tailored so the tail can stick out of them. At 4:10 AM, Dick Grayson proves he's a master of disguise by first being unrecognizable and then being unrecognizable in a different way.

A true master of disguise! He's already showing hints of his ability to be Agent 37 of Spyral.

Notice how the panels are all wonky in the previous scan? I'm sure Marv Wolfman put a note in the script to the artist: "We're being artsy this issue! Art it up!" At 5:20 AM, we finally learn what happened to Deathwing. I don't mean we get an explanation of what Mirage did to him and why he doesn't have testicles anymore. We just see that he's making an appearance so that the audience can go, "Oh, that fuckbunny isn't dead? Great." The silhouette from earlier has dragged Changeling into Deathwing's bachelor pad. She's still just a dark profile but she mentions that Changeling is probably strong enough to accept her seed so it must be Raven. I guess being a demon from a dimension of empaths means you don't learn about the birds and the bugs. Unless this answers a question I'm sure I asked much earlier! Changeling can turn into a female version of any species! And Raven squirts semen because, well, she's Trigon's daughter. At 6:05 AM, Arsenal goes jogging with Bill Clinton. Clinton messes up Sergeant Steel's plans to manipulate the Titans into working for the government by telling Roy that he wants the Titans to be completely independent but he hopes that they'll work with the government. This plot point feels like Marv worked himself into a story arc that he didn't want to pursue any more. It's not like the DC Universe needed another team working on behalf of the U.S. government. At 6:15 AM, Garfield Logan finally gets laid.

Okay, maybe he doesn't get laid. But he definitely comes in his pants.

Do you think Marv Wolfman was in the shower when he thought, "Comic books have 24 pages. There are 24 hours in a day. Hey! I should steal an idea from Neal Gaiman!" At 7:43 AM, Nightwing crashes through a skylight. Just like Batman taught him! I can hear Bruce now: "Good job, Dick! Now they'll have to call Wayne Skylight and Window Repair! Another payday for the Batman!" At 9:00 AM (Eastern Time, Planet Earth, Sol System), Jarras Minion of some planet in the Alpha Centauri system watches his entire race disintegrate before his eyes. Probably a symptom of Zero Hour! At 10:05 AM, Nightwing declares, "I'm not a doctor! I just feel like a doctor!" It's his philosophical explanation for why he doesn't use lethal force. It totally makes sense because Nightwing still punches the shit out of people just like how doctor's love to give shots and cut people open. At 11:20 AM, Changeling begs to remain a virgin. He escapes but he has some missing time so he might also be pregnant. I guess I'll never know unless he starts showing in 24 hours! Or I'm curious enough to go buy some back issues. Ha ha! That was a joke! I have no curiosity. Page 12 is noon, of course! Nightwing has lunch with a detective because Dick Grayson had the fear of Alfred beaten into him about sitting down promptly at noon for the midday meal. Twenty-four hours for Dick Grayson went like this: 9 PM - 4 AM: Risk life with grown ass adult man in bat costume. 4 AM - 8 AM: Sleep. 8 AM - 9 AM: Waffles. 9 AM - 12 PM: Training. 12 PM - 1 PM: Cucumber sandwiches. 1 PM - 5 PM: Study time. 5 PM - 6 PM: Tea. 6 PM - 9 PM: Try to evade Bruce and Alfred as Dick finds a quiet spot to masturbate. At 1:30 PM, Roy has coffee with Steel. The government's final offer to the Titans: the government gives the Titans the Terraist's satellite, an Earthbound base, and money to pay off any lawsuits against the Titans and in return, the Titans promise to consider missions for the United States. What a terrible deal for the government! The Titans can just turn down every mission and the United States gets nothing for their investment. There must be a loophole. Steel reminds Roy, "You gotta decide fast!" As if it wasn't the easiest deal in the world to say yes to! At 2:25 PM (Eastern Time, Planet Earth, Sol System), Jarras roleplays Kal-el's early days. As his world is destroyed (along with some visiting Darkstars), Jarras escapes in a pod called the Omegadrone. It's both an escape pod and a weapon! I don't remember the character Minion at all. Probably because this was the last Titans comic I read for decades. At 3:55 PM, Wolfman reveals that Red Star has taken a job as a mall security cop. And I guess a babysitter as well since Baby Wildebeest is hanging out with him. At 4:10 PM, Roy Harper signs the contract with the government even though he knows it's going to blow up in his face. Fucking leftist comic book writers, portraying the United States government as underhanded, manipulative bastards who don't give a shit who they hurt to get what they want! At 5:20 PM, a bunch of Darkstars are killed by the rainbow spiral that destroyed Jarras's planet. The populace of the planet had been bred to be passive. So I guess the moral of this story is that hippie beatnik pacifists are only asking for trouble. Fucking right wing comic book writers! Well, at least Jarras has learned the lesson that peace is for dead people. The Omegadrone will teach him how to get revenge. At 6:03 PM, Roy thinks he's going to get Wally West to join his government Titans team but he's really going to get Impulse. I know that because I looked at the future roster of this team: Arsenal, Damage, Impulse, Mirage, and Terra. No wonder I stopped reading it! At 7:32 PM, Nightwing takes a shower. Naked! I know that's how most people take showers and I probably didn't need to emphasize it but he also jerks off so maybe I should have started with that.

DC canon: Dick Grayson jerks off thinking about puns.

And after he finishes.

At 8:54 PM, Dick Grayson turns in his resignation to Roy Harper. He's officially off the Titans! Good riddance, ya dumb jerk! If that even is you. Try looking more like Dick Grayson next issue, Dick Grayson! At 9:20 PM, Red Star, Pantha, and Baby quit the Titans as well. Then they go on a romantic road trip which DC apparently didn't publish. There's an advert in this issue for a Green Arrow story arc called "Cross Roads" that the copy compares to Knightfall and which nobody fucking remembers (probably!) but DC never published a Red Star/Pantha team-up?! No, they were right. Just as I was typing that, I was thinking, "Fuck, I would never have purchased that shit." At 10:10 PM, Changeling agrees to stick with the Titans. But he's full of Raven's disgusting seed, so he'll probably just turn on them immediately. At 11:05 PM, Dick and Kory break-up. But not in person! Dick waits for her to arrive to a dinner where he can dump her but Kory knows better and just flies into outer space. I don't remember what happens with her but it's probably super boring. I'm sure she goes home, fights with Blackfire, fights some Gordanians or whatever dumb race always enslaved the Tamaraneans, and then remembers why she moved to Earth in the first place. At midnight, Phantasm arrives to lead Harper and Logan into Damage #6. And then into Titans Zero Hour! Oh. So I guess I do have one more issue of this story arc to read: New Titans #0. I also have a Titans Elseworld Annual in the stack. Plus a Team Titans Elseworld Annual and one more Team Titans issue. And finally, before I can totally move on, Deathstork #0! New Titans #114 Rating: C. The one hour per page gimmick really helps Marv Wolfman clean up a bunch of loose ends to get the Titans ready for a big group change in Zero Hour. Plus he was able to shove in the Minion origin story (which was really just Superman's origin). And I usually give the art a pass even when it's not very good (and I often ignore it when it's great!) but holy Lobo's bulging crotch, it was fucking terrible this issue. It was so bad that I'm not even going to remember who the artist was so that I don't have to feel embarrassed for them.

[bluboothalassophile]

Hello! ☠, 😈, and 🍭 for that Halloween list, please, with Dick, Kori, and Tim? ^^ Thank you in advance! (I asked for Dick and Kori again because I need a fix from that last prompt I sent...) You rock!

Hello,

Okay, I couldn’t do the Cemetery visit or the handing out candy prompt, so I can’t fix the DickKori pain you’re feeling. However, I would like to announce that there is an entire DickKori story coming Right After I finish I’ve Got the Umbrella; which will soon be coming to a close; titled:

Written in the Stars

Synopsis: It’s the wedding of the century, as Dick Grayson finally marries the love of his life Koriand’r. Nothing could go wrong for the perfect… except: Who Is Karras And Why Is He Crashing The Wedding!?

Anyways here’s the oneshot for Tim and trying on costumes!

Bonding Time!

Of all the insane Halloween traditions to engage in this tookthe cream of the crop.

Tim did know how he had been roped into this but he had beendrafted by Tammy, his girlfriend, Cass, his sister, Stephanie, his best friend,and Raven, his other great friend into taking Terry, Mar'i and Lian costumeshopping. It was a gang up on him, he knew that, but it was kind of fun. Terrywas adorable in his firefighter costume (Terry and Jay were hooked on a showcalled Chicago Fire). Mar'i was Starfire, she had thrown a fit when the mereidea of having a different costume had come up. Helena was a police officer(Babs and the Commish had been thrilled and were even lending Helena a badge).

Now they were waiting as the girls were going about pickingout outfits.

Now, why they were doing this in September was actually important.Dck and Kori’s delayed honeymoon was happening next week, as the couple wouldbe running off for a Europe. Specifically Madeira, Portugal. Anyways, October,Kori and Dick would be gone for Kori’s favorite holiday, so they werecelebrating Kori’s favorite holiday now in September. And that meant… costumeshopping…

Tim just sat idly with his pad, watching some mind numbingnonsense with Terry, Helena, and Mar'i who were al enraptured by the show.

“I don’t get why we’re doing this in September,” Ravengrumbled.

“Cause it’s fun, and you leave next week with Roy, and Dickand Kori leave the week after the wedding, for their honeymoon, which wasdelayed,” Tim said blandly.

“That’s not even fair,” Raven whined.

“You lost the bet. Oooo! This is perfect! Try this on!”Tammy giggled.

“I like!” Cass grinned.

“I am not wearing that.” Raven stated.

“You lost the bet, and Tim said he’d help us make you!”

“Don’t drag me into this!” He protested.

“Tim, what do ya think!?” Tammy giggled appearing dressed asSupergirl. Tammy did it far more justice than Kara. She giggled, fluffed her afroa bit as she examined herself, Tim’s eyes were glued on the miniskirt that wasriding up her strong thighs. Her chocolate skin made the costume seem far morevibrant than it ever could on Kara.

“You look cute!” Stephanie giggled. “Oooo! Cass! What do youthink!?” Stephanie demanded holding up some black shiny thing.

“On!” Cass giggled.

“Okay, Okay!” Stephanie gasped as Cass pushed her.

“You know, this is fun,” Tammy giggled coming over to him.He was still having trouble thinking as he forced himself to look up at hisgirlfriend.

“You’re having fun?” he asked skeptically.

“Yeah, I thought it’d be weird and everything what with Stephanieand all, but she’s pretty chill, and your sister is awesome, Rae’s interesting.Though with how you and Rae talk I’d think you were friends before Jay broughther home,” Tammy chuckled.

Tim felt his nerves go up; under threat of Lucas’ rage noone was to breath a word about Bats. “Rae’s so chill, kind of like she’s an oldfamily friend,” he chuckled nervously.

“RAE Come Out!” Cass shouted.

“I would rather be dead than seen in this.”

“Now!”

“Why don’t we pick you a Halloween costume Cass!?” Ravengrowled.

“Cause Cass is always Mulan, now out!” Stephanie demanded. Timfelt his tongue dry up as Stephanie stood there in stockings, the black suitwhich was really more like a sheik bathing suit, sleeveless, and bunny ears onher platinum blonde hair with a bunny tail. Her tanned skin was glowing as she appraisedherself.

“I know you cheated at that bet,” Raven snapped appearing, Timbit his tongue to keep from laughing at the disgruntled demoness dressed as abelly dancer.

“I did not feathers!”

“Blasphemy now!?” Raven sputtered.

Steph stuck her tongue out at Rae.

“You look good Rae,” Tammy laughed standing.

“I look like an idiot,” Raven deduced and Tim snickered nowwhich had his friend’s eyes narrowing on him dangerously. “Your sisters aredriving me batty!” she hissed.

“Steph is so not my sister, and you made the bet with Cassand Steph,” he mocked.

“You all suck,” Raven grounded out.

“What do you think, Rae?” Stephanie demanded.

“I hate bunnies,” Raven answered.

“You’re no fun,” Steph huffed out.

“Don’t mind Rae, she’s been sore since she got duped in thatmagic trick,” Tim reminded the girls, which had Raven’s eyes flashing red asshe folded her arms then.

“You were sworn to secrecy, Timothy,” Raven warned.

“And I have never said what the bunny incident was,” Tim smiledat her.

“Oooo! There’s an incident! Now I gotta know!” Stephsquealed as she bounced a bit.

“Me too!” Tammy laughed.

“There Was No Incident,” The demon growled.

“I have photos!”

“You show those to anyone and I know where you sleep, Tim,”Raven warned him solemnly.

“You adore me too much to think of doing anything,” Tim remindedher sweetly.

“I got Dami back for the KissCam, do you think you could getaway with spilling photos?” she smiled sweetly and Tim gulped remembering Raven’srevenge on Dami.

“Sister dangerous, I approve,” Cass nodded.

“No,” Raven warned.

“Sister!”

“YES!” Stephanie bounced. “Come on Rae, no bunnies for me! Ineed a costume!”

“Can’t you just go as Batgirl?”

“Cliché,” Stephanie mocked.

“This is fun, we should hang out more,” Tammy mused with Cass.

“Dance!” Cass smiled.

“What?”

“At seven!” Cass grabbed Tammy’s wrist and Tim just sighedas he looked at Terry, Helena and Mar'i.

“Girls are crazy,” he informed his little brother.

“Yeah,” Terry nodded. “Jay say so.”

“And Jason’s word is gospel here kid.” Tim avowed solemnly.Tammy and Stephanie were going to kill him in those outfits! Why did he evenhave these feelings for Steph!? She was his best friend? Tammy was his girlfriend.This shouldn’t be that difficult!

[cyrelia-j]

[Fic] Deuces IV: Heartbreaker (Garak/Bashir)

(Apologies if #1 this has weird characters and #2 it doesn’t cut. I’m about to melt down trying to get this to work and on every device I use it looks wrong in a different way so I’m at a loss)

First off, MASSIVE thanks to @eilupt​ @ladyvean​ @noxziconsortium​ @valkyriesews​ and anyone else I forgot to mention for your input on Cardassian fair food. Also, I wanted things to be a bit different but don’t be alarmed by any snags in the road because this is ultimately definitely a garashir universe :) Previous parts are here:

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Summary: AU (no Dominion also kept some other characters alive like Bareil because this world is a happy place) Garak and his surrogate daughter Ziyal find themselves on Deep Space Nine on a stopover to Bajor. While Major Kira shows Ziyal around DS9 Garak and Julian have their date. Julian is optimistic. After all, he’s got this down to a science

Keiko O’Brien is an absolute gift from the Prophets, Julian likes to say making use of local idioms, and if Miles doesn’t treat her properly Julian is totally going to steal her. That’s what he likes to tease, but she really is an intelligent and infinitely creative woman who has been invaluable in the success of what Julian likes to call his infallible first date sure thing holoprogram. Jadzia had at first referred to it playfully as “Julian’s Lizard Daddy Trap”. Keiko had then told the both of them about gairaigo and how a lot of Japanese products to this day bear strange sounding names because of the fascination with borrowed words . She then showed them an old “family heirloom” that was something called a “bento box” with the odd combination of words “Crunky Ball Nude” elegantly scrawled across the top. She then said with a perfectly straight face that if Julian wanted to truly thank her for her contributions to the menu that he would call it nothing less than “Julian’s Delicious Lizard Delight Circus.”

The program now bears the innocuous file name of “JDLDC1”

The program in question is the ultimate product of love and devotion- and if he’s being frank, Julian’s attempt to streamline the “first date” into a happy efficient guarantee of success. It had taken the three of them – Jadzia, Julian, and Keiko – two years to complete with some degree of trial and error but it’s a masterwork. Julian had built it off of one of Recreational Station Hidalgo’s old modules of an exotic carnival and the three of them worked to modify every parameter to meet a certain taste; namely a certain Cardassian male taste, though Julian didn’t see that it wouldn’t appeal to most Cardassians as a whole with some modifications.

Quark certainly seemed to think so. Going off Julian’s impressive track record in fact, he thought if Julian would let him copy it that it would net them both a tidy profit with the steady influx of Cardassians passing through the station. Julian wouldn’t hear of Jadzia and Keiko being left out but in the end he decided that he still wanted to get use out of it before it became public.

Quark had asked sourly exactly how many more Cardassians he really needed to entertain as many as he had already. So perhaps Julian had developed a bit of a reputation- amazingly over the course of his time on station he’d gone from Deep Space Nine’s resident Ladies Man to resident Lizard Queen- but well, he still hadn’t quite found the one who he could really fall for. Well, alright, perhaps Julian had fallen for several dozen going by Miles’ count but they just weren’t quite it. There was still something missing there. And thus came in the holoprogram that made the entire process easier.

Jadzia had contributed to the majority of the attractions, the exotic animals on display, the rides, and the shows. Of course they’d been honed and refined over time with new data to account for Cardassian musical preferences, hearing, exceptional eyesight, differences in equilibrium, adrenal responses and the like and it was absolutely magnificent. He’d also managed to- with Miles’ persuasive help initially- “sweet talk” Gilora Rejal from the Science Academy into further assisting them during her periodic visits for research. She’d thought the idea was completely ridiculous at first, but as he laid out his ambitious plans and designs, she couldn’t help but throw in corrections where she saw improvements were needed.

By the end of it, both she and Jadzia had engaged in some fantastically heated debates on adjustments and turned out a marvel of engineering. Jadzia may have also slept with her which Julian was a tad envious of since Gilora was a stunning woman. She’d warmed to Julian’s company once he’d finally stopped being so circumspect and polite and he corresponded with her regularly with her now to keep abreast of the latest news and current events on Cardassia Prime. She had a completely wicked and unforgiving wit and she also helpfully provided him with the best and most heated topics of debate that he took full advantage of using on his dates. Julian still wondered on occasion if he might not have a chance, but Jadzia was certain that it would never work.

Her associate, Ulani Belor had been curious as to their “secret” conversations and meetings though Julian didn’t know if she’d have an interest he’d explained the project to her as well. Their “colleague” Dejar had little interest in any of it and thought the lot of them were allowing themselves to get distracted by nonsense. Well, that was Julian’s introduction to the Obsidian Order and its operatives and he could say he’d be perfectly happy to go his entire life without dealing with another one of them. Ulani had taken interest in the food that Keiko had been working on. Julian hardly fancied himself a culinary expert- Miles once said he was pretty sure that Julian would ingest anything for the purposes of getting laid. But between the two of them they seemed to reach a perfect accord and marriage of both Cardassian and Earth tastes.

Or rather it turned out that the Cardassian taste was particularly receptive to a lot of Japanese and other Southeast and East Asian foods not often represented in most Federation cultural exchanges. Both scientists declared after tasting the dango smothered in yamok sauce that if the Federation actually brought some real food with them, they might find more Cardassians to be receptive to their proposals. Keiko then wondered if the Vietnamese balut that some back stalls still sold had would carry well over to regova eggs. It absolutely did and Ulani was happy to share some other Kardasi festival delights such as W’sai, Kori balls, and Nurot. Well, lacking a sense of taste or not, Julian was completely sold and it turned out, so was Legate Turrel when he was on the station during negotiations with Kai Winn and Vedek Bareil. Not that Julian is bragging, but he doesn’t think that Vedek Bareil had anything on his negotiating skills.

Julian wasn’t sure how he’d felt about Captain Sisko subsequently designating him official head of the Cardassian welcoming committee, remarking with a perfectly straight face that he was pleased Julian had overcome his initial difficulties with showing foreign dignitaries around the station. Julian was sure there was some look that passed between him and Jadzia just then which made him pout just a bit before ultimately accepting incredibly graciously. He could hardly look a gift horse in the mouth.

And he was good at it, he found, his social life aside. Julian had grown quite adept at reading the necessary cues to avoid any embarrassing incidents (Kira still seemed crushed that Gul Dukat had no interest in him whatsoever though Julian was hardly crushed by that realization as he found the man utterly insufferable) and learned which subtle ones to throw out when off duty to get a feel for the atmosphere as Keiko liked to say. Julian saved those little tricks for his dates though; no need to let on too early just how good he was at this game. Most of the men he dated seemed to prefer his “vapid twink doctor” bit anyway and he only employed the most subtle use of his Cardassian routine. He was terribly good at it.

According to Quark as he enters the bar tonight, they were taking bets on which of the newest station arrivals Julian had his eye on. Quark informs him a bit sourly that he’d lost a good bit of latinum when he bet on the older doctor from Lacoria City. Rom on the other hand had picked the Tailor Garak right off the bat and is counting his winnings rather loudly at the bar. Quark snaps that they aren’t his winnings since “his woman” had to pick the candidate for him. Julian just smiles and shakes his head as he looks for Garak to make an entrance. Leeta knows his tastes so well.

Julian had arrived exactly on time, neither early nor late knowing how Cardassians value punctuality. And what an entrance he makes. Garak looks absolutely luscious in the dark red silk shirt wrapped around him magnificently, showing off those broad shoulders and delectable thick waist. And speaking of thick… Julian is sure he must be drooling, looking at those impeccably tailored pants hugging thick thighs and Julian finds himself catching a discreet glimpse to the burnished old Bajoran sculpture that he’d donated out of generosity.

Of course those in the Federation were renown for stupid gestures like that though Julian admitted to Quark that if he would be so kind as to perhaps place it say along the one wall near the first floor entrance where Julian might make use of it for “observational purposes” he might say that he owed Quark a favor during one of Odo’s subsequent “witch hunts”. Quark hadn’t needed more than a month before he called that favor in and Odo hardly seemed amused by his accidentally spilling a drink on the “Odo in a jar” that he’d assumed the guise of to replace Quark’s actual one. Julian loves the sculpture.

Especially now that the flat, reflective surface is giving him the most stunning view of Garak’s ass that he could have imagined. Julian usually prefers bottoming but for an ass like that he’s more than willing to be flexible. …In more ways than one.

“The house takes two! Place your bets now!” Quark yells out the code as every eye on the bar turns to Julian for just a moment. He smiles a bit self-effacing at that, the 2 references the two hours Quark thinks it will take him to bed the humble tailor. Julian certainly hopes so. A few bets go for 1 and some for a half- Julian mentally rolls his eyes at that bit of optimism- but he trusts Quark, really. The house is rarely wrong. Julian meets Garak with a few steps, seeing the curious look.

“They’re taking bets,” Julian explains with a disinterest shrug. “I couldn’t begin to guess on what but I have to tell you, that you look absolutely fabulous.” Julian gives a casual but hopeful brush of his upper arm. “I love this shirt,” he says, sure to keep his flirting completely human for now. He can let the fun begin once they’re inside. Garak’s smile in return is brilliant. It’s a wide pleased grin and Julian can see the hint of tongue poking the air, tasting, scenting.

He was sure to shower and apply the deodorizing oil that he and Jadzia had developed after his second date had informed him rather bluntly that he had a delightful time but didn’t think he’d ever be able to adjust to the human scent and taste. Julian never thought he particularly smelled but Gilora had said there was a very strong musk that he would get when perspiring that had quite a salty and at times bitter taste to it. Jadzia didn’t have it and neither did Keiko and he thought it might be a male thing until Keiko reminded him (which he really should have remembered being a doctor) that humans of East Asian descent tend to have fewer apocrine sweat glands and so there began the great experiment to develop an oil that could effectively eliminate that issue. After much trial and error he realized everything Federation produced left an odd lingering taste on the Cardassian tongue even if it was supposed to have no odor.

It took months but in the end it worked with the final approval from both Gilora and Ulani he had an effective oil which sat over the skin until it wore off naturally over a few days’ time but until then reacted exactly as needed to produce no odor but a faint trace of sandalwood and root from the north renowned for it’s mild aroma. They both informed him that they’d scented him more than they cared to and he absolutely owed them both big time. He figured it couldn’t be worse than any other deals he’d cut with them.

There’s a curious glance from Garak at that but he refrains from commenting on it instead complimenting Julian’s outfit. Julian can see a linger of eyes to his bare neck, bare collarbone and he almost wishes that he could bet on himself. One. Definitely one.

“You’ve no idea how excited I am to show you what I have planned for this evening,” Julian says practically vibrating. The Midway. Julian definitely is going to start there with this one. One hour if that and he’s got this. He shoots Quark a wink holding up a finger watching as the patrons erupt in another frenzy of betting as they make their way to the second floor. Julian’s got this…

Garak doesn’t know that he’s ever been more bored in his life. He smiles politely as Julian drinks the broth out of the boiled egg his head timing out just when he imagines that Julian is going to accidentally spill some down his neck because it’s “terribly messy” and there it goes, a few inviting rivulets of the clear broth running down that nicely tanned skin.

“And I take it that’s how I’m supposed to enjoy this delicacy?” Garak asks already knowing the answer because he’s already known the answer to every insipid contrivance that this evening has brought him. Guls, if Julian wasn’t so gorgeous… but even that’s starting to wear thin. Julian smiles- wait for it- inviting tilt of his head just so, to the right, another flash of his neck and Garak knows that he should have long put a hand on Julian’s shoulder to show his interest but it’s just so obvious he can’t bring himself to give in to such egregiously blatant cues even if it drags this miserable date out further.

That and actually every dish that Julian has tempted into his hands has been completely to die for.

The teriyaki, the sweet and sour sauce covering the fried pop beetles nearly brought him to another plane of existence. Julian had gone on about the work he and Chief Engineer O’Brien’s wife had put into the food in the program along with on Ulani Belor who he’d only chanced to hear of due to his former colleague’s amateurish bungling of a simple sabotage mission. Naturally he told Julian he wasn’t familiar with her. Right about now he’s almost wishing he was on a date with her as Julian begins another “conversation starter” that he has to be fishing off of a hidden list somewhere.

“Yes, you’ve got it, you do that brilliantly,” he says in a fawning compliment that would be nice if it wasn’t immediately followed up by a predictable air scenting and an enthusiastic “flirty” draw of his finger in the air and by the state did someone print Cardassian dating manual in the Federation since the end of the occupation because Garak feels he could sit here with a list and check everything off in order.

The Regova balut is also heaven. The sprinkle of the furikake that Julian suggests is masterful. Julian then asks his opinion on the proposed changes to the household registry next quarter that the council meets and Garak nearly wants to weep. Garak is sure that Julian will present the most uninformed opinion imaginable and allow Garak to “educate” him while he tries to debate a careful but ultimately poor position. Guls, if he wanted to have a date with a vapid holoprogram he’d just run the thing without Julian and just enjoy the food and the ambiance.

How long has it even been? Garak is certain he’s lost all sense of time being trapped in this miserable mobius continuum of bad date. Perhaps he’s in fact died and this is some Faustian iteration of eternal torment for a life poorly lived. The most delicious food in the galaxy in exchanged for company so poor it would drive a man to want to take his own life. Alright, so perhaps the newly opened Federation archives have only given him a larger plethora of work with which to reference when he wants to seem smart- at least that’s what Parmak had said to him the last time they had corresponded. He’d sooner die than admit it but there’s actually some Earth derived literature that he enjoys and he’d been hoping for more interesting cultural exchanges and debates like he’s enjoyed with some of the more frequent human visitors vacationing on the Morfan Providence but…

“Is something the matter?” Julian asks and Garak can’t believe that he’s been driven to actually show any of his anguish outwardly. Ironically in a rare moment of veracity he has no clue where to even begin to itemize the obscenely long list of everything single “something” which has grown fed by Julian’s obviousness into a “matter”.  My, where to even start… perhaps the scent is the most difficult to reconcile. I definitely scented you in the Replimat and it was a touch strong but very human, very alluring and it was quite nice. But here tonight it’s like tasting a pleasure doll engineered to be inoffensive which may appeal to some but it’s quite boring. You were charming in the replimat and here charm has given way to some series of contrived scripts you’ve been following exactly like a carefully choreographed routine. Which makes perfect sense of course given the interesting conversation I’d had in Quark’s but still I’d hoped for something a bit different.

He’d in fact as was his custom gone to Quark’s earlier in the day to make a discreet study of the area, check for escape routes, hazards, observe the atmosphere. He hadn’t noticed anything untoward as he ordered a drink and kept his ears and eyes open. It had allowed him to relax a bit and it wasn’t long before he started catching snippets of conversation about the “infamous” Julian Bashir which was quite a curiosity. He certainly wasn’t going to involve himself with anyone who could pose a possible danger to himself or Ziyal but then in striking up a conversation with a fellow named Morn who couldn’t shut up for the life of him he learned several interesting things.

The first being that the young doctor was infamous for the number of Cardassian men he’d bedded- primarily military men and a handful of freighter captains. The second was that his reputation was so large that the entire bar got in on serious betting whenever a “fresh wave” of Cardassians were on the station and third… Third being that he never fails to “bag his lizard” with this very program. Which Garak supposes he could see if he was feeling particularly charitable but he’s been gamely going along with this for the past hour now and he’s sure he’s put in enough time.

He went along with taking the lead in winning Julian some nonsense trinket from a target shooting booth, earning much praise from a “strength tester”  that was definitely doctored, to a boat ride with just the right ambient sounds to create pleasant complimentary reactions in one’s nervous system and on and on to Julian himself who clearly has mastered the fine art of appealing to a very specific segment of the Cardassian military population. It’s a wonder they haven’t invited him back to give him his own holiday. Which Garak supposes would be all well and good- Yes, doctor, I’m so pleased with your obvious love of civic duty that I’ll gladly put a hand on your shoulder and tell you what a good boy you are- except he isn’t some authority obsessed soldier who gets off on these bland deferential power games. He wants passion, he wants a challenge, he wants there to be a reason for him to bring discipline, to lead, to bring Julian to heel. Perhaps he is getting old because Julian clearly has done this dance so much he could go through the motions unconscious but is it really asking too much to have something more than just a pleasing body to jam his prUt into?

Still, he has to bear in mind that cause embarrassment to the station CMO might prove unwise. Yes, a lie is definitely in order here, though he needs to make sure it’s not a medical one. He supposes Ziyal will have to be it. It’s uncreative and stupid but frankly, Julian doesn’t deserve his good stuff and the sooner it gets him out of here the better.

“I’m sorry, doctor,” he says a touch dramatically. He might not be getting more than Julian’s usual routine but he likes to think that even if he’s returning in kind that his routine is much more convincing. “I’m afraid I’ve been terribly poor company but you see I’ve just been so terribly concerned about Yaya. Oh, I know she’s a grown woman and I trust Major Kira to be showing her the same consideration and hospitality that you’ve shown me-“ Guls, he hopes not “-but I just haven’t been able to give you the attention that you deserve and it’s such a pity after all the trouble that you’ve gone through. It’s only my hope that we might do this again sometime.” Perhaps after he’s long dead and Julian gets some new material.

Garak wears sincerity brightly and reaches across the table to put his hand over Julian’s. He intends the gesture in the human way but sees Julian’s curious look at the display of dominance. Maybe he’ll get lucky and a fleet of Klingon birds of prey will crash into the station. But it seems to do the trick and Doctor Bashir is ending the program mercifully. Garak could kiss him, he really could. Except that would certainly make him try for a second and Garak isn’t too keen on remembering the first. He wonders if anyone ever actually bets on the doctor to fail. Judging by the expression on Julian’s face somehow he doubts it.

And it’s with that sour taste in his mouth that Garak finally gets back to his quarters determined to hack the station computers and never again eat in the Replimat when Julian isn’t on duty. He sees Ziyal laying sprawled on the couch looking about the way that he feels right about now. He opens his mouth to ask, the two of them exchanging a look before he does.

“Kanar?” She asks sympathetically already sitting up to go get it.

“Kanar,” Garak agrees with a sigh.

Looks like he’s not the only one who had a “bad date”.

(Part 5 is here)

[thetinybutimportantthings]

Zookeeping Nonsense

So I was at the zoo with my gf the other day and we were joking about all the birds/beasts we eventually want to keep, and she made a passing comment about us needing our own zoo. Completely joking of course, but me being the incorrigible nerd that I am I started to wonder if my selection of favorites might actually be viable in a smaller zoo setting. So for those zookeepers or any other keepers of animals on my list, your opinions on it would be most appreciated. Keep in mind, this list isn’t all of my favorite animals or even all the animals I want to keep, but those I would feel relatively confident in providing adequate care for (with help) and that would do well in captivity. I do not actually intend on having a zoo, I just want to see your thoughts.

Mammals -Red kangaroo (Macropus rufus) -Eastern grey kangaroo (Macropus giganteus) -Red necked wallaby(Macropus rufogriseus)

-Giant anteater (Myrmecophaga tridactyla) -Tamandua (Tamandua spp.)

-Grey fox (Urocyon cinereoargenteus) -Bat eared fox (Otocyon megalotis) -Coatimundi (Nasua spp.)

-Greater kudu (Tragelaphus strepsiceros) -Giant eland (Taurotragus derbianus) -Warthog (Phacochoerus africanus) -Bactrian Camel (Camelus bactrianus) -Reeve’s muntjac (Muntiacus reevesi) -Blue duiker (Philantomba monticola)

-African crested porcupine (Hystrix cristata) -Lowland paca (Cuniculus paca) -Red rumped agouti (Dasyprocta leporina)

-Llama -Alpaca -Barbados blackbelly sheep -Spanish and nubian goat -Kunekune pig

Birds -Ruddy Duck (Oxyura jamaicensis) -Mandarin duck (Aix galericulata) -Pygmy Goose (Nettapus auritus) -Black Necked Swan (Cygnus melancoryphus) -Muscovy duck (Cairina moschata)

-Victoria Crowned Pigeon (Goura victoria) -Pheasant Pigeon (Otidiphaps nobilis) -Nicobar Pigeon (Caloenas nicobarica) -Crested pigeon (Ocyphaps lophotes) -Common Bronzewing (Phaps chalcoptera) -Luzon Bleeding Heart (Gallicolumba luzonica)

-Kori Bustard (Ardeotis kori) -Silver Pheasant (Lophura nycthemera) -Lady Amherst's Pheasant (Chrysolophus amherstiae) -Helmeted guineafowl (Numida meleagris) -Wild Turkey (Meleagris gallopavo) -Peacock (Pavo cristatus) -Brush turkey (Alectura lathami)

-Rosses Turaco (Musophaga rossae) -White cheeked turaco (Tauraco leucotis) -Livingstone's turaco (Tauraco livingstonii) -Red billed hornbill (Tockus erythrorhynchus)

-Laughing kookaburra (Dacelo novaeguineae)

-Superb starling (Lamprotornis superbus) -Violet Starling (Cinnyricinclus leucogaster) -Purple glossy starling (Lamprotornis purpureus) -White crested laughing thrush (Garrulax leucolophus) -Red-legged Honeycreeper (Cyanerpes cyaneus) -Bearded Barbet (Lybius dubius) -Red-crested Cardinal (Paroaria coronata) -Pekin Robin (Leiothrix lutea)

-Emu (Dromaius novaehollandiae) -Ostrich (Struthio camelus) -Greater Rhea (Rhea americana)

Reptiles -Blue tongue skink (Tiliqua scincoides) -Shingleback Skink (Tiliqua rugosa) -Monkey tailed skink (Corucia zebrata) -Fire skink (Lepidothyris fernandi)

-Crested gecko (Correlophus ciliatus) -Mossy prehensile tailed gecko -Leachie Gecko (Rhacodactylus leachianus) -Mourning gecko (Rhacodactylus chahoua) -Fat tailed gecko (Hemitheconyx caudicinctus) -Knob tailed gecko (Nephrurus spp.) -Giant day gecko (Phelsuma grandis)

-Black and white tegu (Salvator merianae) -Caiman lizard (Dracaena guianensis) -Black spiny tailed iguana (Ctenosaura similis) -Rhinoceros iguana (Cyclura cornuta) -Gila monster (Heloderma suspectum) -Mexican beaded lizard (Heloderma horridum)

-Long tailed boa constrictor (Boa constrictor longicauda) -Rubber boa (Charina bottae) -Carpet python (Morelia spilota) -Boelen's python (Morelia boeleni) -Black headed python (Aspidites melanocephalus)

-Cuviers Dwarf caiman (Paleosuchus palpebrosus)

-African spurred tortoise (Centrochelys sulcata) -Matamata (Chelus fimbriata)

Amphibians -Solomon island leaf frog (Ceratobatrachus guentheri) -African bullfrog (Pyxicephalus adspersus) -Horned frogs (Ceratophrys spp.) -Budgett's frog (Lepidobatrachus laevis) -Bumblebee dart frog (Dendrobates leucomelas) -Dyeing dart frog (Dendrobates tinctorius) -Green and black poison dart frog (Dendrobates auratus) -Mimic Poison dart Frog (Dendrobates imitator) -Vietnamese mossy frog (Theloderma corticale) -Amazon milk frog (Trachycephalus resinifictrix) -Waxy monkey tree frog (Phyllomedusa sauvagii)

@the-awkward-turt @thezookeepersdiary @thezookeeperslife @zookeeperproblems @zookeeperrick @zookeepingitreal @thechilidog @uroplatus @ccortez07