#kind of? she gets tagged regardless
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Day 7 - Morsel
[eulmore time - written as a make-up prompt because i didn't have time yesterday, oops]
Much as the food of Eulmore looks fancy and decadent, none of it is appetizing to you in the moment.
Alphinaud, wonderful little brother that he is, is kind enough to speak for you, in this situation where your words are yet again locked between your teeth. "'Tis no offense meant, Lady Chai." He reassures. "I am quite sure that the food is wonderful. 'Tis just, my brother. . . he is quite ill, often," and he glances at you, as does the Lady Chai, and the pallor of your skin (ashen, because your skin is too dark to turn pale) gives weight to the statement, as does the exhaustion hanging off your bones, "and -- and I fear that even a morsel may upset his stomach, as it is now."
"Oh, how tragic!" Dulia-Chai cries, in full sincerity. She is a kind woman, you think. You know. She insists that you sit, insists that you drink some kind of hot tea, and -- despite everything, the way Eulmore and its very foundations of the rich stepping on the less fortunate, despite everything -- the tea does help your stomach to settle. Not enough that you can eat, just yet, but it helps.
Alphinaud paints, and you will need to wander and gather information eventually (the Exarch had asked of you only to catch up with Alphinaud, for your own conviction rather than any attempts on their part to convince you further, but you owe him this). But for now -- yes, you will sit here, lifting a cup of tea with cold, trembling hands, and hoping that you will eventually be able to nibble on a morsel or two. (You've not eaten in. . you don't remember how long. Some food would be nice, you think. If there's anything you can actually eat, food issues kept in mind. Perhaps Alphinaud can find out for you.)
#bound with thread | original posts#divine being of crystal and star | k'pheli tia (sae'pheli'ehva)#alphinaud leveilleur#dulia-chai#kind of? she gets tagged regardless#ink gone dry | writing#ffxivwrite#ffxivwrite2024#too short to go under a cut this one
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#( 'cause you're a sky full of stars ⋆。°✩ ) music#((HOW DO I TAG AS A TW FOR THE WORD ''WHORE''? I don't mind it but I know plenty of people do regardless of context.))#( the stars the moon they have all been blown out ⋆。°✩ ) skills#((Okay but I could see Cass doing a song like this that's basically a big ''Fuck You'' reclamation of the word#Because you *know* that not only do female artists get called shit like this all the time#but a female guitarist / singer / etc in an otherwise all male band?#Especially considering she doesn't mind showing a bit of skin on stage (not because she's sexualizing herself#though there's no problem with that either- she just does it because she likes the vibes and it's cooler than always covering up)?#At least she's usually good at handling that kind of criticism because she knows that it's coming from a place of blatant sexism.#ANYWAY- Yeah. I feel like a lot of In This Moment stuff has similar vibes to stuff Cass would sing as a vocalist.#Not always lyrically but in the overall sound of it.))
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immediate follow-up to these pieces
The sabre cat lies in the grass where they promised to stay.
The grass there is tall, and they’re pressed flat against the ground, so from a distance they look like nothing more than a very bright-looking rock. Efri knows better – she sees them, walking the fields holding tight to Sissel’s hand, and she breaks into a run.
She calls a “Hello!” and the sabre cat’s head rises, and Sissel falls down.
She pulls Efri down with her, the both of them hunkering into the dry grass. When Efri looks her in the face she’s wild-eyed. “Efri,” she says through gritted teeth, “what is that?”
“My friend,” says Efri sheepishly. “I told you not to freak out.”
Sissel’s jaw works for several seconds. She’s got that bloody rabbit or feral fox look about her again. Her free hand is clutching at the grass, fingers digging down into the topsoil. “That’s not your friend, Efri,” she finally bursts out. “That’s – I don’t even know what that is!”
“Sabre cat.”
“That’s not a sabre cat! They’ve got those teeth long as your arms! That’s something else!”
She’s being a little bit rude, but Efri can’t really blame her – Efri was a bit scared too, when she first met her friend. And both of their houses have just burned down. Of course Sissel’s jumpy.
(Efri’s still not feeling upset like she should be. The thought doesn’t make her want to cry – it just feels logical. It’s just true.)
“That’s just a rumour,” Efri says loftily. “They don’t really have teeth like that. And this one’s nice, promise, they’re not going to hurt you. They’ve never even ate one of my goats.”
Sissel’s staring. The whites of her eyes almost seem to shine in the beginning of the evening dark. Her face is mottled pale. She yanks her hand away from Efri and curls up in the grass and dirt in a little ball.
“You’re going to get your dress extra dirty,” Efri warns her, but she doesn’t move, so Efri leaves her to calm down and goes to talk to the sabre cat.
They’re waiting, ears pinned down, looking quite uncomfortable. They peer at Efri accusingly.
“That’s my friend Sissel,” she tells them, rubbing her thumb in circles over her stick. “Sorry she’s being a bit rude. She’s upset. Her house burned down.”
The sabre cat chuffs. They still don’t look best pleased, but they flick one of their ears up.
Efri says, “Mine too.”
Sissel’s staying in a ball in the dirt. Efri faintly registers that she’s beginning to feel hungry.
Efri jabs her stick into the ground. “So. I had an idea. Do you want to go to Winterhold?”
Her friend stills. They draw back, posture wary, a low sound in their throat – but their ears turn to face forwards. Efri thinks that might mean they’re listening. It’s hard to tell, most of the time, but she thinks that’s what that means.
“Because you always get excited when I mention it,” Efri continues, turning up turf with the bottom point of her stick, “and Sissel and me can’t really stay here. It’s all burned down. And Sissel’s great at magic – did I ever tell you that? – and that’s where the College is, up north, and if we go there then she can learn. It would be hard to go by ourselves, but if you’d come with us, then we could all help each other. We could all go.”
Sissel’s still on the ground. The sabre cat stands up, flicking one of their paws.
“Do you want to come with us?” Efri persists.
The sabre cat leans down and thunks her gently on the head with their chin.
“That’s not an answer,” Efri says. They sniff at her.
It’s hard, because this is an important conversation, and it feels very one-sided. At least when Sissel argued the idea she could make points Efri could refute. The sabre cat just lashes their tail and looks doubtful. (Why won’t they just agree? Don’t they know that Efri’s trying?)
Efri sighs and turns back to crouch down next to Sissel. “I’m trying to explain the idea but I don’t know if they like it or not. Can you help?”
Sissel’s arm slips down off her face. She looks at Efri balefully out of the one eye that’s visible. She doesn’t speak.
And Efri gets it. She knows it’s a lot. She knows it’s a weird plan and a weirder day and she knows Sissel is probably upset about the houses and Jouane and how she had to hide under someone’s porch when a dragon came, the right amount of upset, as upset as Efri should be, and she knows Sissel clams up when things go wrong and she knows this is how they always do it, Sissel small and frightened and Efri the strong friend, the one in charge, coaxing her out of her head and making plans and making it better, she knows all of it. But.
But her throat still hurts and her legs are still tingling and she’s tired of trying to be positive, strong, the one in charge.
“Sissel,” she says, voice grating and croaky, “I’m trying.” And she’s not crying exactly but her throat feels stiff and she’s hungry and tired too. She drops her stick and sits next to Sissel in the dirt. “I’m trying. I don’t know what to do.”
Winterhold makes sense. It’s a place both the others want to go – she thinks, at least. And Sissel would do well there, she can learn, she can stop being afraid. And she just needs to get out, get the both of them out. They can’t stay here, not after this. Efri can’t stay to watch the town get rebuilt when something inside her has been clamouring for what feels like forever to tear it down. She can’t stick it out, counting down the months until she’s reached whatever arbitrary age is old and responsible enough to leave, soothing Sissel each time she gets hurt and nobody does anything to prevent it, staying stiff and silent at the dinner table. She hasn’t talked to her parents in the last week, been out in the mornings before they wake up and not back until the lights were put out and they were abed. There’s a rage knocking around inside her at it all. She can feel it like a stone deep in her stomach. She doesn’t want to be angry any more than Sissel wants to be scared. She wants to stop it now before it gets bigger.
She was just trying to find a solution. She just wanted things to be better for everyone.
Dimly, she recognises Sissel’s hand on her shoulder, her arms around her. She’s sitting with her head in between her knees, the stained orange fabric of her smock stretched out against her face. She can hear Sissel’s voice, soft and unsteady, but she’s not talking to her.
She looks up.
The sabre cat is standing just a little in front of them, low to the ground, cautious; Sissel, gripping Efri’s shoulder tight, is talking to them. “She says you want to go to Winterhold.”
They nod very slowly.
“Um,” Sissel says. “Do you want to go with us? I don’t think Efri wants to go back.”
“Do you want to go back?” Efri mumbles. Sissel’s hair is tickling her face.
Sissel shakes her head. “Just don’t know if it’s smart, is all.”
The sabre cat sighs, long and low, and nudges Efri’s scrunched-up body with their paw. Sissel breathes sharply in – but of course Efri isn’t hurt, and she relaxes.
“I don’t know what to do,” Efri tells the both of them.
Sissel squeezes her tightly; the sabre cat sighs again and prods their head a bit under her leg. It doesn’t really work because they’re so much bigger than she is, but they do it again, and again, till Efri gets the message and the girls pull each other to their feet. The sabre cat lets Efri flop over their neck, same as before, and it isn’t until Efri’s adjusting her position that she remembers, mumbles, “My stick!” Sissel picks it up from where she threw it to the ground and passes it up to her. Then, nervously, Sissel climbs up over the sabre cat’s back too, wrapping her arms around Efri’s waist for balance.
“I know you don’t like giving people rides, so thanks,” Efri whispers to them, her fingers curled into their long tawny hair, and they chuff and start walking.
They end up at the cave, of course – where else? It’s well dark by now. Sissel sparks a light in her palm, casting an eerie glow over the damp cave walls, and Efri is delighted to see that the goats are all still there – or almost all, after she does a head count. “Good,” she praises them, slipping off her friend’s back, and feels a pang when she thinks that she’ll probably leave them behind. She’s never too attached to any in particular – they’re livestock, after all – but the herd as a whole has been her constant companion since she was four or thereabouts. Basically a baby. She’ll miss their snuffling, cloven-hoofed presence.
They light a little fire there in the cave, Efri and Sissel gathering and stacking sticks for it. Efri’s fire-flint lights the sparks and Sissel, though she hasn’t learned yet how to make a flame out of nothing, helps them grow.
Efri finds some nuts in her pocket and shares them around. She and Sissel savour them, crunching them into little pieces; the sabre cat swallows them whole. She doesn’t give any to the goats; they’re chewing aimlessly on the moss and don’t seem to need them.
They all lie down, then. It’s still early but it’s been a long, long day, and it’s warm and comfy with the fire going. The sabre cat lies down, and Efri and then Sissel lie against their side – they make a rumbly noise like a purr, which is a bit funny – and then even the goats come and lie with them too, little hoofs and horns digging into Efri’s legs. It shouldn’t be comfortable, and it isn’t, but it really, really is.
Maybe they’ll go to Winterhold tomorrow. They’ll talk about it.
Efri thinks, half-asleep, that her parents probably haven’t even noticed she’s gone – she’s out of the house all the time they’re in it, and now they don’t even have a house to meet in. She wonders if they’d forget about her like they seemed to forget Onmund. She wonders if she cares.
Onmund is there, at Winterhold, at the College. If she goes there she’s almost sure to see him. Does she want to see him?
She doesn’t know. She doesn’t know how she feels about anything today. Maybe she’ll know tomorrow.
Efri closes her eyes. Against the rise and fall of her sabre cat friend’s ribcage, with Sissel’s knees resting in her lap and one of the kids rubbing the side of its face against her bare foot, she falls asleep.
They’ll sort things out in the morning.
#there is technically one more piece in this... series I guess#but it's not as plot-relevant#spoiler alert: they do go to winterhold#sissel says fuck it we ball let's get out of here#the sabre cat says fuck it I'm sick of being in a cave with children who are convinced against all logic that I'm an animal#(I may as well travel the country with those children instead)#I love writing efri's perspective so much... it's so easy to get into her head and she's so smart and yet so frequently Confidently Wrong#also her emotional core is like. very much drawing from my own childhood. so it's kind of cathartic in a way#a lot of fun regardless#anyway#posted this bc I'm in a Mood and needed to do something semi-productive about it#enjoy!!#my writing#fay writes#microfic#skyrim#the elder scrolls#tes#tesblr#oc tag#efri#sissel#kazari
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I absolutely love writing Newt Scamander as a dad. Absolute mama bear. Occasionally clueless and entirely ineffective? Sure, yeah, probably. Yet still always aggressively protective, in his own special way.
#fic: a teenage legilimens#oc ch: ephesus rafael goldstein scamander#newt scamander#fantastic beasts fanfic#my stuff#this one may never get completed bc it’s just a short one shot & doesn’t have much plot but it’s fun to scribble away at things sometimes#regardless#also fife has grown up to be the kind of kid that would join a frat#which is to say — he’s far more theseus than he is Newt & combined w the legilimency he’s got Weasley vibes#but Newt loves him nonetheless — and Tina loves him too - even tho she ironically blames all his rule bending on newt — the stories far#more complicated than that lol#anyway rambling#uefb rambles in the tags#back to statistics fml
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Do you have any general hcs of the 1bit/1beat cast? Anythings fine
Kind of rough but
-I've played around with the idea with Eruno being from an orphanage/foster home(the "because you've got a proper family" bit) but I go back and forth on this one.
-Nio and Sakuma are friends! He does shifts at Bitwave they hang out there. The poor boy needs someone to fend off the fangirls.
-Eruno and Akitaka accompany Haruya on deliveries sometimes. Pals.
-When Aira's mimetic muscles get installed she doesn't really quite get how to use them immediately. Her expressions start out real stiff(which she expresses dissatisfaction with, and gets help from the others) to real exaggerated and overplayed(think unbridled rage or pained anguish at things that just kind of annoy her).
-Also she has Kiri make her taller so she can grow alongside her friends!
-Also Also by 1beat she has at LEAST one sibling who's just, a really muscled out doll in frilly clothes.
-Meru listens to death metal. She'd hoped it'd help her stay up better but now she just kind of likes it.
-Outside of tending to the shrine, Hakuhi has embroidery as a hobby.
-Izuchi took piano lessons when he was younger(parents made him do it to try and play up the prodigy genius image). He quit.
-That potion thing he made in 1beat was ripped from Kirai's anime but in part he'd made it after Eruno came to him Demanding a way to make her dog live longer.
-He went to Blue sun college(less because he thought he needed to and more for the benefits a degree there would give him) and got into an apprenticeship with Kiri. He keeps the lab when Kiri moves to Coco Alley(easier to skirt by the law). Familiar with the Blue Sun Trio to some extent.
-He has a sweet tooth but doesn't really admit it because he deems it unhealthy.
-While he did have a hand in the creation of the master program, he doesn't stay on the team after it's finished. Does continue to get occasional updates about it from Hiyu and Nanase though.
-His room is all clean and organized on the surface(maybe a few seashell displays, a poster covering a hole in the wall) but he keeps all the goofy weird shit stored away in drawers and under his bed.*
-I've played around with the idea of there being a 3rd Nasuga sibling who's just too young to be relevant in the game(<-no canon basis i just thought it'd be fun) but I'm not sure if I'd keep that.
-Enri has a pet hamster! He's like the band's son.
-The gang Kirara used to be a part of was like a sparkly gyaru girl gang. She never really enjoyed fighting but took a lot of lessons growing up so she was really good at it. The gang is still going strong though and at least a few of her Gyaru Friends are members(and there's at least one member who's just a plain normal ass girl that hangs around them but that's getting into oc territory).
-Rocca ends up growing up to be like Really Fucking Tall. Momori models clothes on her and remarks that she could be a model if she didn't trip over herself so much(not that she'd want to be one anyways).
-Mary has 3 siblings, they've done a way better job at staying out of the public eye(and have grown somewhat distant from her as a result).
-On account of being friends with a lot of the townspeople and having a lot of relatives, Hitohito is just one of those guys with a lot of connections. In a "guy who knows a guy" way.
-Chino is Coco Alley's mom jkasdsa.
--She brings Sora(was familiar with his family and doesn't want him to get too lonely) cookies and flowers sometimes and while he's dismissive about it he does secretly appreciate it.
-Tobari is the heiress to a big tea emporium who dipped because she got bored and/or got into a disagreement with someone over there, but continues playing up her Elegant Fancy Lady image despite living paycheck to paycheck(which I mean, good for her I guess.)
-Although Sagara knows Asuto through Hitohito, they actually interact fairly regularly in anime forums.
-Hitohito, Izuchi, and Sagara were on friendly terms when they were kids but grew distant for reasons. Hitohito and Sagara had gotten back in touch and still hang out. Heat reached out to Izuchi but was promptly brushed off, still looks out for him. Izuchi and Sagara have a weird frenemy/rival thing going on.
-Sagara has no siblings she just kind of lives alone with her mom who may or may not hate her.(although it's less "hate" so much as disappointment)
-Sagara's chicken avatar is modeled after one of her childhood pets.
-Sagara definitely Naruto runs.
-She holds DnD(\Dnd adjacent. Just some ttrpg I'm not an expert) sessions at every couple of weeks. I'm not saying Izuchi willingly participates(those commoners are hopeless without his guidance), just that she didn't exactly have very many other people to invite(Hitohito and sometimes Meu and eventually Nanashi).
-She has a knack for trying to help townspeople as part of some sort of Magical Girl Code but isn't as good at it as she thinks she is.
-She has a compartment in her arm warmers that's full of bird feed, she's made an alliance with the pigeons.
-While she does cool it with the Organization stuff, she never drops the chuuni behavior. Eventually opens a small cake shop with some edgy chuuni-esque title(debated on whether it should be in the same place Little Berry was, like after little berry closes its doors).
-Nomiya and Hiyu butt heads a lot but they both get along fine with Azusa. Somebody needs to be nice to her god damn it.
-The Kujohs have a pet dog but it's actually Azusa's. Following with the rest of the family, it's a big intimidating dog that's actually just really chill. Enri has tried to look past it but he's always very leery about visiting them.
-Nomiya's riding an adrenaline high throughout most of the game but his more calm demeanor in his events is just him going in the opposite extreme as a result of coming down from it. He's usually fairly loud and confrontational, just not THAT loud and confrontational.
-He keeps in closest touch with Tobari after the hackers are disbanded. Somewhat on account of her being able to hold her own in Break Passage the best out of the other three. She views him as a weird little brother.
-The hackers hold gatherings in memory(or what little of that memory they even retained. It's mostly secondhand from Nanashi) of Mikado where they commit minor crimes. The gathering was Kotora's idea the crime was Nomiya's.
-Sagara has a journal that she calls the Abyss Tome that's just full of fanfiction and anime drawings of herself and her friends(/enemies). Has a bunch of spell names listed down in it.
-Saaya and Meu are friends! Saaya comes to her for divinations about her love life a lot and just ends up venting. Meu's happy to listen though and tries to comfort her the best she can.
-Speaking of therapy though, Saaya does get therapy sometime post-canon and distances herself from Nanase(while a lot of Nanashi's friendships that start off on the wrong foot have room for growth, the memory thing makes things kind of... weird with her). She's in a much better state by 1beat.
-Saaya writes a lot of poetry.
-Yoh and Sagara are related. Somehow(I did consider nephew at one point but that didn't really pan out).
-So are Hiyu and Arumu. They've got that green hair and funky eyebrows.
-Akuta and Kaori date briefly(well, she's a fan of his work, and he is rich, and while he can't speak multiple languages he is well-spoken, what could go wrong?) which just ends in them breaking up over a disagreement over a book's ending. That was more the final straw though, actually getting to know him put into perspective just how far from her expectations he actually is and she's not super pleased about it. They do stay friends but something something important lesson about your idols being people.
-I feel like I've said somewhere that Kotora leaves the cafe to Rocca when he retires but I need to clarify that Kotora keeps being the cafe guy well into old age and that Rocca would be a whole adult by then.
-Kaori was the youngest of her siblings and only one to stay with her mother, she sees her dad as a good for nothing deadbeat(it wasn't an amicable divorce) and the ordeal heavily influenced how she views romantic relationships as a whole. Grew up somewhat distant from Kotora and their sister but reconnected in adulthood.
-Her "ideal guy" is just the best traits of her favorite book leads cobbled together like some kind of frankenguy. (And she might be internalizing something... who knows)
-The world did enter a more 'cyberpunk dystopia'-esque futuristic state a long time ago and the return to more traditional old timey ways is sort of in response to that, but Yasune is the only one who'd actually lived through it. Although then again the 2nd oldest character in the game is only 36 so...
The post is starting to not process so I'm going to cut it off here.
#*The example I had listed on my hc file was 'life sized Danny Devito cardboard cutout' but I don't know if I want to keep that#The piano hc was more the remnant of a sweet beach band au I had because I was thinking about rainbow rocks again#Sweet beach is interestingly enough my go-to for aus. I've never even told you guys about the fantasy au#(they're just adventurers though it's nothing extravagant. It doesn't even cover all the characters)#Mary's parents were in the picture when she became an idol but her siblings were raised by their grandparents.#Tobari stays at hotels and spends most of her paycheck on fancy tea.#she's kind of ridiculous levels of Jack-Of-All-Trades but it helps that she's a fast learner#Chino wasn't incredibly close with Sora's parents(friends maybe) but that won't stop her from looking out for the boy. New son#Haruya was probably pals with his brother. Regardless of how he may have felt about Sora himself(scary)#Kirai probably made an offhanded comment about outgrowing everyone someday so he's really pissed when he ends up#shorter than both Haruya and Rocca#You probably were wanting more 1beat hcs but as much as I love the 1beat cast I've only replayed recently#so none of my thoughts about the cast are quite fully formed yet#Might make a follow up eventually though because the hc file is Long#Omitted most of the ones I've already talked about but since those are scattered about my tags and the server I probably#should've included some of those too. Feel free to ask for elaboration on anything#Some of them get kind of lengthy too and I left most of those out but I did leave a few in and just heavily handwaved the details#Some of the shorter ones were shortened too because the post just wouldn't process ashsaldhjka#pieceofcake.txt#cakeheadcanons
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Just a few photos of Nida Khurshid I’m absolutely obsessed with
#I LOVE her vibes#I have been googling her because I fully plan to steal Lata from Jason Ankles and include her in my s/p/n redux#Latika Dar#Nida Khurshid#Desinatural#<— for the last pic :)#Latika Desai#Obviously she’d be a good deal older by the time the events of s/p/n are taking place but still#Unless I messed with the timeline a little. S/p/nwin means nothing to me so I suppose she doesn’t HAVE to have grown up in the 70s#Alternatively I push the events of s/p/n back to the 70s or maybe 80s and make it a period piece. Lol#Honestly I’d be kind of into that#At the same time I’m picturing this cool desi lorekeeper demonologist and exorcist in her 50s#who is an uncompromising pacifist and knows more about demons than possibly anyone else alive#Which is where I personally imagine a young budding nerd interested in the supernatural such as Lata could end up#I almost wish s/p/nwin was more popular if only so that we’d already have fan content for where people imagine the new characters are#by the time s/p/n is happening. I guess it’s just lil old me and what I can glean from the tags and wiki pages lmfao#At least when the preq gets cancelled I can literally just adopt her outright without worrying about later episodes contradicting anything#Regardless! Look at her#My posts#Prequel momence#Latikaposting#Anyway this has been Real Insomnia Moments with Ben ✌🏽#Who needs sleep when you can hyperfixate on a character from a show you refuse to watch!
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i hate the discussion online about pick me's, especially with the release of the barbie movie, because the word has completely lost its meaning. a pick me is a person, usually a woman, who puts down other women in order to receive male approval. it is NOT a woman who is a tomboy, a woman who does not like pink or girly things, or someone who criticizes certain aspects of traditional femininity. while it is true that activities or aesthetics that are considered feminine are often looked down upon and seen as lesser, you can't forget that people who actively choose not to present feminine or conform to feminine standards are punished.
anyone can be a pick me if they're an asshole who thinks they're better at being a woman, using whatever arbitrary standard they set, and therefore more deserving of praise and attention.
#been having lots of Thoughts about this lately#especially because my ig explore page has become infested with reels#“making fun” of pick mes and claiming to support women#even tho their version of a pick me is just someone who doesn't wear makeup/like pink/uninterested in watching barbie#it's kind of pathetic how not self aware these people are bc they have become pick mes themselves 💀#also they bring up barbie and miss the very basic point the movie was trying to make#not to mention the existence of weird barbie. who is shunned and excluded for being WEIRD and not like the other perfect barbies#even tho she is just as smart and capable as them#it's kind of wack how “ur gonna get judged regardless so be yourself” turned into “its okay to be a pink loving sparkly bimbo”#“anyone who criticizes the makeup industry and beauty standards and doesnt like pink is simply an idiot who never grew up 💗”#uhhh i forgot what my personal posts tag was whoops
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LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOOO
*V1 voice* [LITERALLY SEETHING]
#TAKE THAT CYNO AHA#(pretty sure he would've killed me next round because of pyro/dendro gkjgflk)#part of me is like i won't bother putting this in main tags because not much happens but tumblr will do it anyways through keyword search so#genshin impact#spark's genshin adventures#spark talks about nothing of relevance#been a while since i played genshin because i'm a bit burnt out on SO MANY GAME RELEASES AND UPDATES ATM#but windblume event was nice. i like collei and sucrose's serious conversation about social anxiety#i can't really speak on it coming from at LEAST someone undiagnosed but it reads like both of them are on the autism spectrum?#like collei always has to plan out conversations in her head and can't adapt easily (which same actually tbh)#and sucrose hyperfixates on her research and finds it hard to reach out past that#i wasn't expecting that kind of deep dive but it's interesting. i'm glad the two of them get along!#imo i guessed they'd be good friends from the start of the event. they have a lot in common#god i wish kaeya showed up more though. though i still have the new dain quest to do so!#also noelle is getting the pretty claymore regardless on if it's good for her. it's what she deserves <3
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#tag talk#been doing some thinking now that I'm in a he/him state and very definitive ace for the foreseeable future#my therapist connected it back to validation and trauma response#because like.. the fawn response is very strong in me. but only when I'm she/her. he/him me is more fight#and a significant part of my sex drive is validation-seeking. the need to prove my competence at something.#and I still hyperfixate about sex regardless of whether or not I want to engage in it myself.#but the desire to engage in it feels more driven by a need to prove myself.#or prove to myself as the case may be#but the case fact remains that as R I feel a much higher social need whereas L feels much more independence#but L experiences much higher social anxiety and conflict versus R feeling much more social lubrication due to the fawn response#because I get the drive to make everyone like me. so much less anxiety because why worry? everyone loves me so no issue here#we're both flirty though. that doesn't change at all.#idk. how does this affect me going forward? how can I use this information to better live my life as happily as possible?#I definitely need to be more aware of the fawn response. I'm pretty on top of the reflexive fight response though.#I first recognized that back in 2019 so I've had plenty of time to work on it and I'm way less aggressive now than I used to be#but the people-pleasing is something I haven't really tackled yet so I guess that's my next big thing to analyze#maybe the answer is doing less to try and make people like me and accepting that I'm likeable anyway#but also recognizing that not everyone has to be in love with me#I don't need everyone to think I'm the best#I don't need to be in a popularity contest all the time#oh shit. I wonder if that's connected to my reaction after dipping my toes into polyamory.#because I have this drive to be the best compared to everyone else#and a drive to perform when I feel like I'm the center of attention#hmm. I feel like this is maybe connected to how I act when I'm groups. kind of an attention-whore#idk. I'm still pondering#anyway goodnight
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the K-Drama Save Me is SO good- the character writing, the acting, the cinematography? *chef's kiss*!!!!!!!! It's a heavy and emotional watch, but if you have the time and energy for a 16 episode series I definitely recommend it! 👍 The summary on Tubi is a little funny though, it lures you in with the promise of four precocious young men and then you realize just how many characters are a part of this
#save me kdrama#NOT FOR THE FAINT HEARTED IF YOU HAVE RELIGIOUS TRAUMA THOUGH ESPECIALLY OF THE XTIAN KIND#bad with names but the lead actress is SO GOOD oh my god I rooted for her SO HARD- CANNOT say enough about how good she was#Also all 4 of the main boys have my entire heart too but especially Dong Chul justice for my boy Dong Chul 😭🤎#I recognize two of the actors from bring it on ghost and honestly? The goofy streamer guy? King of comedic relief side characters I ADORE 😭#Also the other guy the govorner's son is amazing too and the big guy being the heart of the friend group? He is BIG and STRONG#he can lift his friends up physically AND emotionally 😭🤎#the semi-criminal haircutting dude in the hawiian shirt? 👀 😳#the curly haired villain is SO much fun to hate he is SO horrible to his core the actor for him is GREAT#the creepy pastor is great too though and the apostle Kang lady too everyone is SO GOOD#Also literally so many different plotlines HOW did they manage to mostly satisfy me with only 16 episodes I am in AWE#that's some damn ~GOOD WRITING~ babey!!!#UPDATE I had to search and Dong Chul's actor is OLDER than me so I no longer feel weird thinking he's pretty. so yeah that too lmao#and also an excellent actor I really really FELT for that boy. The proof is he's the only name I remember#(I am infamously bad at character names regardless but it's worse when it's a show in a language I don't speak)#this tag wall is so long but I have ~thoughts and feelings~#posts that are probably for no one but me but it's MY tumblr blog so I'm making them anyways#kat gets personal#me
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man the tension and contrast between suyeong and sanga. delicious
#tütensuppe#jds tag#suyeong being 100% ready to kill a child if it would get her where she wants to go#sangas iron grip on her kindness. mwah#it started out being her only way to move forward but now she DOES have power and she refuses to give up kindness regardless!!!#and heres yuseung who probably walked into the situation knowing it might get her killed :(#anyway this was the last chapter in the fourth book and i REALLY wanted to finish it today#took a bit longer than expected whoops
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blank canvas.
problems arise when your tattoo artist boyfriend starts getting too cozy with the girls that wanted him to do more to their bodies than just inking their skin. the thing is, they knew what he wanted and they knew what you couldn’t give.
pairings. ryōmen sukuna, fem!reader
genre. florist x tattoo artist au, mild angst, opposites attract
tags. nudity, insecure!reader, virgin!reader, dry humping, mentions of needles, mentions of cheating, slutshaming
notes. if you’ve been here for a while, yes this is a repost from an old hq fic :’D i rewrote and remodeled it for sukuna bc i feel like he fits this au!
part 2 | part 3 | epilogue
Sukuna had seen it all.
He wasn’t dumb and he most definitely wasn’t oblivious to the fact that he was attractive, bringing him a clientele of adoring women who would frequently visit his tattoo parlor. Who could blame them? He was handsome, had a good physique, and an overwhelming aura that pulled the attraction of many women, single or not, who were desperate to vie for his attention. His tattoos and his dyed hair even added to the overall bad boy persona that he had which, to be fair, was a girl’s guilty pleasure.
The women were very assertive, it seemed, to try and lure Sukuna into their little seduction game. Was he getting tempted into it? No. He was loyal and he’d like to stay loyal to his kind and beautiful girlfriend. After all, winning you over wasn’t as easy as it would with any other girl.
However, there were certain moments that almost tested his loyalty to you, especially when some of the women would ask to have their tattoos done on the most intimate places of their bodies.
Take yesterday as an example: one girl asked to have a tattoo on her buttocks and she was certainly more satisfied at the feeling of Sukuna’s palms on her bum rather than the actual tattoo she was getting. And to top it all, she bluntly asked if he offered more service rather than just giving tattoos. Crazy.
He had previously mentioned it to you that as part of his job, he was obligated to give his clients the tattoos they requested, regardless of where on their bodies they wanted them. It was strictly business. Ironically, despite dating a tattoo artist like himself, you had no single trace of inked art on your body. You were an untouched canvas that had never been painted on. Still, Sukuna respected your choice and he surely respected your boundaries even more.
He knew that you had always been a gentle girl when he first met you at the floral shop across the street. You were always prim and proper, always dressed modestly, always following the rules, and always doing the right thing. All you cared about doing was to express your love through the delicate petals you arranged in your flower-scented haven. You were happy to be in your own little bubble, content in the company of fragrant blossoms and soft-spoken solitude. Introverted. Reserved. Pure. Unassuming. He was the exception to your goody-two-shoes nature, because he ended up winning your heart despite being the complete opposite of you. It wasn’t an easy task, either. Deciding to get to know you was on a whim at first, since he was intrigued about your simple joys in life and how you weren’t the type of girls that would visit his tattoo parlor. Something about your demure nature pulled him in until he realized that there was nothing else he wanted in this world but to make you his. He began by greeting you every morning from across the street, then giving you the same bouquet of flowers he purchased from your shop, followed by sending you texts complimenting how beautiful you looked as he watched you from his store, and finally asking you out on spontaneous dates.
It may be a bit peculiar to see the two of you together, but Sukuna pursued you because liked you. He was undeniably in love with you. He liked your smile, liked how cute and adorable you were, and liked how a simple look at you made him want to be a better man. He loved the idea of being with a girl he could protect.
The main issue was, Sukuna dropped out of college and just decided to open a tattoo parlor business because he simply didn’t want to waste his years studying for something that he wasn’t passionate about. But that was the source of your parents’ distaste. They told you that you had no future with a guy like him. They said that they would disown you as a daughter if you decided to choose him. They called him dirty, rebellious, and uneducated.
At that point, he thought that you would leave him after learning his rather reckless choices in life, but you stayed.
You left your parents' home and stayed with him.
And he was grateful that you did.
So to ask the question again, would he ever do something to betray you after everything that happened between you two? Of course, not. Not in a million years, no
But then again, he was also just doing his job and it wasn’t like he was purposely flirting with the girls that often flocked him during work hours. He was simply accommodating a client. Nothing more, nothing less.
And on one of those typical days, he had to work overtime when one of his returning clients asked for her fifth tattoo to be done by him. He just finished picking up the tools he needed as she walked towards the recliner seat asking, “Should I sit here?”
He nodded once, turning around to face the girl who looked at him with her alluring eyes. “Yeah, just let me know when you’re ready.”
Oh yes, she was surely ready. She even had a smirk displayed on her face when she slowly unbuttoned her shirt, keeping her gaze at him while teasingly revealing her busty pair.
He didn’t really pay attention to the size of her tits but instead, just casually pointed to a certain part of her body, “Is this where you want it?” he asked, referring to the lower left part of her breast.
With a very flirtatious grin, she nodded, clearly knowing that her assets were her biggest weapon. “Yes. Would it be easier if I took off my bra, yeah?”
“You don’t have to. I can work it out,” he casually responded, reaching for his glove and busying himself with all the tool preparations.
The girl let out a silent giggle along with her best friend who sat on the side, waiting for her turn. Waiting to be the recipient of Sukuna’s full attention. Sigh.
“No, I can take it off for you,” the girl insisted, unclasping her bra and setting her huge breasts free for him to ogle at. They were perfectly round, probably a 40D, and a light pink shade for her nipples. With how firm they were sitting on her chests, she had probably gotten them done.
He cleared his throat, averting his eyes as he asked her to sit on the recliner chair. Sukuna had seen women half naked in his shop before, but this was the first time someone willingly got naked in front of him, most especially with other intentions rather than to simply get a tattoo.
Because of the awkwardness, he went ahead and blasted some heavy metal music to distract his mind. He had to think of something else and not stare at the girl’s luscious tits. He had to shift his mind to somewhere else like, for example, why the girl chose a calligraphy of the words ‘la douleur exquise’ on her skin this time.
“Is this French?” he nonchalantly asked, motioning for her to rest her back while he wiped the chosen area with a damp cotton pad. He specifically avoided brushing his hand on her breast, but it looked like the girl was actually angling herself to make him touch it more.
“It means exquisite pain,” she purred, batting her thick eyelashes at him.
His lips formed a smirk, impressed at how much of a skank she was willing to be for him. It wasn’t new, as established before. He’d also had a fair share of women who tried to get into his pants last week, but none of them were successful. He actually found it entertaining to watch them do all sorts of stunts to make him give in. To make him submit himself to his carnal desires. He was a man after all. He had needs, he had to get some form of release, otherwise it could pose a problem in his masculinity.
All while she was getting her tattoo done, the other girl got up from her seat to walk closer to her best friend. Sukuna decided to refer to them in his head as Slut 1 and Slut 2 because he had no intentions of knowing their names. He knew slut-shaming was terrible, but he never said he was a man of virtue and truthfully, how else could he describe them?
“Hey, Sukuna,” the other girl called, sitting at an empty stool with a smile. “You’re single, right?”
He kept his eyes focused on the skin he was inking on. “...No.”
Even from the corner of his eye, he knew that both girls looked surprised, “No way? You have a girlfriend?”
Was it really that much of a shock?
“Yeah, she owns the floral shop across the street,” he mumbled, wiping the trace of blood on the girl’s skin after he finished another letter.
There was a visible pout on Slut 1’s face as if learning that Sukuna had a girlfriend was more painful than the needle pricking at her skin. “So, what’s she like?”
Sukuna thought for a while because he didn’t know where to begin. It was too much of a long story for them to hear about. You were everything he wanted in a woman and that was all he knew. “She’s cute and kind.”
His words earned a giggle from Slut 2. “Is she like the good girl type?”
“She is.” He figured it would be okay to converse about you like this. Besides, he would rather be talking about you than to have these girls just try to flirt with him relentlessly.
“How much of a good girl, though?” Slut 1 egged on, “I bet she’s a virgin and a prude.”
That was obviously none of their business, but damn. They hit a nerve that they shouldn’t have. No one else had managed to bring up a topic like that to him, more so a topic that he himself knew not to cross. His sex life wasn’t as fruitful as anyone thought so, yet not once in his life did he complain. Not once did he talk about it to anyone. Not once did he tell anyone that he had been dating you for a year now and you two never really went further than making out.
“I respect her,” was his answer, much to the two girls’ dismay.
“That’s kinda boring, though,” the other girl claimed, draping her arm around his shoulder before leaning close to his ear. “You’re still a man and you have needs. If I were her, I’d sleep with you every day. In every position.”
The girl on the recliner chair grinned. “Totally! Like, you’re so hot and I feel like you’re good in bed.”
Fuck.
He almost messed up one of the letters because his mind just flew to somewhere unforgivable. It was a sin to even think about, but shit, he definitely missed the feeling of fucking someone. He couldn’t even remember the last time he did so.
“Sukuna?”
He snapped out of his trance and looked up upon hearing the familiar voice, only to find you by the door, your eyes filled with hurt.
“Hey—”
Your voice was caught in your throat as you avoided his gaze. “I just... I thought you were done.”
In a swift motion, you hurriedly walked out of the room before dashing out the door. You didn’t even bother to look back, dead set on leaving him alone with the girls. Your footsteps were far too quick to even catch and he was hoping that you would at least slow down.
“Babe!” he called, unable to chase after you as you shut the door. An exasperated sigh followed.
This was going to be a big problem
Just what was he thinking?
He had a half naked girl in front of him and another girl clinging to him like he didn’t have a girlfriend. It must have hurt you a lot. No, it definitely wrecked you.
“Uh-oh...” the girl mocked. “I can sense trouble”
He decided to leave it be for now and get his job done as soon as possible, even thinking of banning the two girls from going into his shop just to avoid further trouble. He had a lot of explaining to do and he couldn’t wait to go home to make sure that you would listen to him, not overthink the whole thing and place your assumptions because hurting you was the last thing he would do.
At least, he hoped you knew that.
You were washing the dishes when Sukuna came home and the first thing he did was to wrap his arms around you. He had your waist caged in his tight embrace, his chin resting on your shoulder as he whispered sweet nothings to you. To be real, you weren’t in the mood to see his face after what you saw this afternoon. You get it—he was exposed to all sorts of people with his line of work and most of them probably couldn’t just ignore his physical appearance. You were aware that some girls were only getting a tattoo to get close to him. Heck, you were aware that they all wanted to be with him.
But the only reason you were hurt wasn’t because he was desired by women, but because those very same women were all better than you in more ways than one. They fit his type more than you did and you were sure that they could give him exactly what he wanted.
Still, it awfully tugged at your heartstrings.
He was yours, not theirs. You had the right to be jealous when a girl was getting cozy with your man, but to see him letting them have their way? That was a different story.
“Baby, talk to me,” he mumbled, planting a soft, apologetic kiss on your neck.
You gave him the silent treatment as you walked away and dried your hands with a towel. What else would you say? He should already be aware of why you were acting that way. He should be the one to try and talk to you, not the other way around. And with your stubborn mind, you did your best to keep your insouciance, pulling his tattooed arms off of you and heading towards the couch.
You could hear his sigh as he followed you, but you were determined to keep your eyes glued on the TV screen. If he wanted to talk, he should do the talking, you reminded yourself over and over.
“You’re really pissed at me, huh,” he spoke as soon as he sat next to you, a hand carefully placed on your thigh. “I’m sorry.”
“They’re pretty hot, aren’t they?” The bitter question left your mouth before you thought of holding back.
He scooted closer and hooked an arm around your shoulder this time. “Definitely nowhere near as hot as my girlfriend.”
What a load of… You rolled your eyes, remembering how the girls looked and how comfortable he was with them. “Yeah, right.”
You couldn’t explain the tightness on your chest every time you recalled the scene earlier because you knew, you just knew, that there was more that could have happened if you didn’t check on him. You saw it in his eyes, even for a split second, that he almost gave in to temptation. How could he not? You were a prude just as they described—just because you didn’t have any sexual experience like they did. Perhaps when they called you boring, they were right and Sukuna wanted to agree.
He couldn’t be stuck with a girlfriend that he couldn’t even have sex with, could he?
“I shouldn’t have let them put their hands on me like that,” he admitted, showing his dire attempt to look apologetic. “Only you can.”
You took a deep breath and shook your head. “I don’t even know why you’re still with me, Sukuna. I put so many boundaries between us. Don’t you get tired of me?”
“Fuck no,” he quickly answered, tucking your hair behind your ear. “Never. You’re the only one for me.”
Truth be told, you did feel bad that he couldn’t fully experience you as a girlfriend, but he had been very patient and respectful towards you. He never crossed the line and never forced you to do anything you weren’t comfortable with. He said he was doing that because you never gave up on him even when you had the choice to. He said that you were worth waiting for. He said that he was satisfied with what you two already had.
Maybe you could let this one incident go, after all, he was never really a bad boyfriend to you. Sure, he looked like a bad boy, but when it came to you, he was surprisingly soft.
���Okay,” you muttered, sighing in defeat and finally meeting his eyes. “Just don’t do it again. I don’t care if they get naked in front of you. Please set some boundaries and don’t entertain them too much or you’ll give off the wrong impression.”
Your leniency earned a smile from him, delighted to earn your trust again so he made an effort to peck your lips. “Yes, ma’am.”
“You’re annoying.”
“You love me.”
“I do,” you professed, placing a hand on his cheek, “so much.”
Pleased with your words, he leaned in again to give you a much, much deeper kiss. He knew it was all he could do with you, but he wanted to make you feel that his kisses were satisfying enough for the both of you. Just with the way he moved his lips against yours and how your tongue rolled around his—it was almost impossible to breathe at one point, but he softened the kiss to allow yourself to catch some air.
Gosh, you were jealous again. You were becoming annoyed as your mind ran at full speed, thinking of how those girls thought they could put their hands on your man. You were livid at how they tried to steal him from you.
“You’re mine, right?” you asked for reassurance, pulling away to look at his dominating eyes.
The smirk on his lips was replaced by a cheeky grin. “All yours, darling.”
You didn’t know what gave you the sudden confidence to straddle his lap after he said that, but it just felt right. You wanted more of his physical affection and felt like you couldn’t get enough. Both of you were taken aback, obviously, because this wasn’t something you would normally do, and so the heat on your cheeks was mixing with the surprised look on his face. You were sitting directly on his crotch and he was having a hard time to control himself.
“Babe,” he breathed on your neck. “You don’t have to force yourself.”
He was right, but the thought of the other girls constantly seducing him behind your back just gave way to your deepest insecurities. You didn’t have the most perfect body in the world and you most definitely didn’t have the skills in bed that he expected—you were scared that you might lose him because of these facts. Or that he would find someone better, even at the cost of having them on the side.
“Hey,” he spoke again, making you look at his eyes as you relaxed into his touch. “It’s fine. If you want it, I can be gentle. We can go slow.”
“I-I don’t know... I just,” you hesitated, not knowing exactly how to put it into words.
You didn’t know why sex intimidated you. It should be as easy as 1-2-3, just him putting his member inside you, right? But you weren’t really scared of doing the act itself, you were scared that once you did it, he would leave you because he already got what he wanted. Losing it to the wrong person sounds like a nightmare and that was why you were having trouble coming into terms of losing your virginity before marriage.
You could feel the hardness on his crotch pressing against your core and you didn’t expect a moan escaping your lips when you moved at the slightest. The fabric of your shorts were thin enough for you to feel the outline of his hardened member, displaying a prominent bulge on his sweatpants. You haven’t seen how big he was, but you could tell just by looking at his bulge that he was huge. Could you even take that?
He held your waist and guided you to move again, this time urging you to move your hips back and forth, allowing you to feel the friction from his hard erection. Lust was clouding his eyes and it made you feel weak.
“How does it feel?” he asked, his hot breath tickling your ear.
You continued grinding on him with your lips parted, releasing your silent moans, “G-Good.”
He leaned forward to kiss your neck, eventually sucking the soft skin to leave his beautiful marks. “I wanna eat you down there, baby,” he growls under his breath, squeezing your right breast, “You’re gonna taste so good, I bet.”
“Suku—” you whined, gripping his hair while he started matching your movements with his own. It was a foreign feeling for you to feel his bulge rubbing against your untouched core.
“Fuck,” he cussed in a low voice, squeezing your ass with his huge hands in growing excitement. “Let me get a condom.”
This was it.
It was happening.
Or was it?
Your eyes widened in panic as you pushed him back onto the couch. It was as though all of your senses were awakened and your body was telling you that you shouldn’t be doing all this. “N-No, I... I’m not ready.”
You didn’t mean to always chicken out when you two were almost about to do it. You just didn’t feel confident enough to give yourself yet and even if you badly wanted to, you just couldn’t make yourself do it.
You could see the hint of disappointment on his face and he was trying to hide it.
“Right,” he exhaled deeply with his head thrown back on the headrest. “It’s alright. Maybe next time,” he convinced himself.
“I’m sorry,” you softly mumbled, hand gripping on his shirt.
He gave you a quick peck on the lips before pulling you out of his lap and getting up from the couch. “Yeah, yeah. It’s fine.”
You stayed seated as you watched him walk away. “Where are you going?”
“I have to finish this off on my own,” he answered without looking back. You realized he was referring to the act of touching himself because you just couldn’t do the job for him. It was obvious how frustrated he was and for goodness sake, you did feel guilty, but then again, he didn’t act like this before. When you told him you didn’t want to do it further, he would simply laugh it off and say he would wait for you.
This wasn’t the same Sukuna that said that.
You became a little paranoid.
Considering that girls would still pay your boyfriend a visit at the tattoo parlor, you always ended up overthinking about what he was doing while you were supposed to be busy at the floral shop. In the middle of arranging a bouquet of beautiful peonies, your mind was on haywire. You just didn’t feel at ease. You felt like anyone could easily snatch him away from you because you weren’t particularly a striking girl to begin with. You were leaning on the simple, conservative side rather than the rebellious, liberated women that swarmed his shop in hopes of sleeping with him.
Because your thoughts were eating you alive, you decided to head to his tattoo parlor after closing the shop to make sure that he wasn’t doing any funny business.
And you were somehow right.
About three girls were in there this time, two of which you had already seen a couple of days ago, and they were already leaving the parlor just as you arrived.
“You’re really amazing, Sukuna,” one of the girls told him in gratitude, “I might get another one soon.”
You watched them walk past you with a smug expression on their faces as they left the shop. Sukuna had then seen you standing by the door with your arms crossed.
“Really?” you questioned, walking inside with a frown. “They’re here again?”
He sighed and walked back to his station while cleaning the mess from the tattoo session. He wasn’t even trying to win you over anymore. “I can’t just ask them not to come anymore. They’re still clients.”
“Let me guess,” you continued, “Did one of them get naked in front of you again? Did you let them put their hands all over you again? Did you perhaps forget that you had a girlfriend again?”
His brows, now furrowed in annoyance and his mouth, thinning in displeasure. “No. We talked about this.”
You held your breath, raising a brow in return. “I’m starting to think you’re doing more for them than just giving them tattoos.”
“Like, what? Sell my body?” His question was clearly a taunt. A spasm of irritation crossed his face, but he still managed to display a mocking smile. “Is that what you’re suggesting, angel?”
“That’s not what I—”
“Then, what?”
“You know what I mean,” you replied, trying to get your point across while keeping your composure. “You’re an attractive man and they’re the type of women you would willingly sleep with.”
“Jesus. You’re so insecure, it’s crazy,” he retorted, rolling his eyes at you.
Insecure? You couldn’t believe, just couldn’t believe he called you insecure. The air crackled with tension as your jaw tightened, muscles twitching with every suppressed urge to lash out.
“I wonder why!” Your voice rose hysterically. “If you weren’t busy flirting with those girls, maybe I won’t be so insecure.”
“I said I’m not flirting with them!” he argued, slamming his gloves on the floor. His face contorted into a mask of rage and he looked at you with frustration that you had never seen before. It hurt. It certainly hurt. He had been acting distant since the night you didn’t give in to him and you knew that his exasperation towards you was rooting from that.
Your breathing became unsteady. “But you know you’d sleep with them if given the chance. Since I couldn’t do it with you.”
“Then, just fucking do it with me instead of bitching about it every day!” he snapped, voice thick with insinuation. “I don’t wanna be stuck acting like I give two shits about your interest in flowers and whatever nonsense you like to talk about. I wanna be with someone I can have sex with, not sit on the couch all day with a boring person like you!”
His hurtful words left you frozen like a statue, unable to move while being dominated by the shooting pain inside your chest.
You knew this day would come—that he would eventually get tired of waiting around for something that he could easily get from others. However, what hurt you most was the fact you believed he wasn’t that type of guy. That he wasn’t with you solely for what you could give, but rather, for what you just had. You thought he sincerely understood your boundaries and respected your choices the very same way you respected his, but it seemed that he had another thought in his head all along.
After seeing the look on your face, Sukuna had softened his gaze and walked closer to you in reproach to his words and actions, “I’m sorry... I didn’t mean that.”
A tear fell from your eye as you looked at him with both anger and pain building inside of you. Your eyes glistened with unshed tears. “You wanna have sex? Is that what you want?” Your voice cracked in the middle of your sentence. “You wanna do it so bad, let’s fucking do it, then!”
Your fingers forced their way to spitefully unbutton your blouse despite his desperate efforts to stop you. You must be going crazy. But also, he drove you to this point.
“Baby, no,” he said in remorse, grabbing your wrists tightly. “No, I’m sorry. I’m content with you. I really am, I’m sorry. Please.”
Your chest heaved as you cried, unable to stop your emotions from exposing all of your vulnerabilities. “It’s obviously not enough for you.” Your voice quivered, each word a fragile whisper trembling with the weight of unspoken sadness as you sniffled and wiped your eyes. “You knew what kinda girl I am when you dated me.”
He pulled you for a hug and kissed your temple way too many times that you lost count. He felt absolutely sorry for ever hurting you with his words, but they just hit you so painfully to the point that your gaze grew distant and your face was clouded with resignation.
“I know what kinda girl you are and I’m in love with you for it,” he reaffirmed, as if trying to get it through your head but his words were beginning to feel empty. “Please, believe me. I really didn’t mean what I said. You’re enough for me, baby. You’re all I want.”
You didn’t feel comfort from his words, but you still returned his embrace because you loved him. Because you knew, even if he said more hurtful words, that you would still love him. Sure, you would be angry, but your love for him ruled higher than your pride.
You were just scared of losing him over something like this.
“I love you so much,” he whispered in your ear before placing a soft, apologetic kiss on your lips.
When he pulled away, your heart still felt heavy, but you managed to conceal your face with an agonizing smile.
“I love you, too.”
He ran his thumb across your cheek and held your waist on his other hand. You just couldn’t get his words out of your head even after he apologized, because you never knew he was seeing your relationship that way all along.
The girls were right. He was a man after all and he had needs.
The fact that he was staying with you despite not fulfilling his needs must be a work of charity for him, and eventually, he would get sick of waiting around. He would desire you less and less the more the days passed by and it wasn’t absolutely crazy to think that he could potentially meet another girl he liked that was willing to give it all.
The mere thought of it scared you.
“I’ll do it with you tonight,” you offered, your voice breaking, hoping that you could finally break the barrier and be enough for him.
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𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐝𝐚𝐝! 𝐏𝐭.𝟐 ♡︎
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who practically passes out when he finds out you're pregnant with twin girls.
♡︎ ৹ He loves being a dad, especially to his little girl. But to go from one to three is a huge change and it's two more girls!! But nevertheless, he's over the moon.
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who can't wait to tell your daughter about how she's going to be a big sister.
♡︎ ৹ The two of you sit her down and explain to her that she's going to have two new little sisters (in the easiest way you can explain babies to a three-year-old, that is). She jumps up and down, squealing about just how happy she is.
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who spends extra time with your daughter so that you can rest. Being pregnant with twins isn't easy.
♡︎ ৹ He takes her to the park, he sits and plays with her, he puts her down for her naps and for bedtime. Anytime you're too exhausted to give her your full attention, he's right there and ready to help. Even after she's asleep, he always makes sure you're taken care of.
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who can barely rest when you go into labor.
♡︎ ৹ He's going to have two more daughters. He's going to have three kids. His wife is in labor--with twins no less! So, maybe he panics a little but he tries to keep calm and make sure you get the help you need.
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who cries when he hears the individual cries of both of your newborn baby girls.
♡︎ ৹ He doesn't cry often, but boy do the tears start falling. He loves his family so much and now that there are two additions to your little family, there are two more people to love. This is the dream he's always wanted. His daughters are safe and healthy, you're safe and healthy. What more could he ask for?
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who does the so-called "Hot dad walk" out of the hospital, this time carrying two car seats.
♡︎ ৹ He hears you giggling and turns around to see you filming him. He assumes this must be another one of those "tiktok trends" you try to get him to do all the time. But in all realness, seeing him walk out of there with the car seats makes you want to have another kid with him already.
♡︎ ৹ Girl dad!Nanami who softly instructs his oldest daughter to be gentle while holding her little sisters.
♡︎ ৹ "Be gentle with them, sweetheart... They're very small and fragile." He can't help but smile big as he sees his daughter's face light up with joy. Her little sisters and her best friends are finally here. Even if she has to wait a while before she can play with them.
♡︎ ৹ And finally, Girl dad!Nanami, who regardless of the sleepless nights, the screaming, the crying, and all the other drama that children bring, just truly loves his life and his family.
♡︎ ৹ It was his dream to settle down and start a family. Now he has a beautiful, kind wife and three wonderful, healthy daughters. What more could he ask for? :)
a/n: had to do more because its girl dad nanami, obviously. <3 (hearts divider by @/s-h-o-w-y) tag: @o-ikawaii 🩷
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#fanfiction#x reader#fluff#nanami kento#jjk fluff#nanami kento x reader#girl dad nanami kento#girl dad#kento nanami x reader#kento nanami x you#kento nanami fluff#jjk nanami#nanami kento fluff#nanami x you#nanami fluff#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬 ♡
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…
if you read this and the first post, I sincerely apologize. you’re getting a hard look at the deepest recesses of my mind, open agape and oozing my most vulnerable thoughts I could ever reveal. they’re words that I need to be said, written. I find I don’t ever learn my lesson unless I talk about it. so, I hope those who care enough to read are receptive.
#she starts not responding as much#she gets a new job. she’s getting busier#she’s bad at communicating though. she told me herself#I respect it. I still text her but I don’t expect a response right away. that’s the mature thing to do right? we’re grown!#I wasn’t sure to what extent she meant that. keep that in your back pocket for later in the notes#anyway flash forward to THIS WEEK. I see her post a tiktok of this guy who looked somewhat like her soon-to-be ex husband.#in the caption she calls him her handsome sweet boy and that she needed no one else#my heart: eviscerated. I am about to faint. I am serious as a heart attack in saying all of this.#regardless of whom I may have mistaken this man for. it wasn’t me. and while we never made time to discuss what we wanted to be#or anything in regards to relationships#aside from us calling each other babe and saying we love each other. feel it needs to be stated: she started it. it doesn’t matter much#I loved her too. I didn’t realize how much I still loved her until we started talking again. it hit deep upon realization#on mobile so can’t read the tags fully so idk where I’m at. I confront her on it after she says she’s been on a “affection bender#crux of the whole shit is I told her I don’t want a relationship if she’s gonna post her side piece on tiktok. much less see other men#it hurts she’s would do that. but. I extend empathy. I always will.#she’s not in a great spot. she seems somewhat mentally unstable. she’s on the autism spectrum I learned. manic depressive 2 if memory serves#I loved her all the same. I think I always will. it’s hard not to. I’m convinced she’s my soul mate#but how do I know that. that’s just intuition. and what kind of soulmate? there are 4 kinds and she may be the type to teach me a lesson#anyway. back to being the lost soul I already was. time to snap out of my delusion and get back to the grindstone#maybe that’s where I’ll find my purpose. and kindle the love for life that romance and partnership likely never will#it seems like a perilous journey. that didn’t deter me before#I shouldn’t worry so much#there’s freedom in knowing it won’t get better. even more so I’m letting go of expectation#I’m fucking kidding myself. if I could I’d spend the rest of my life with her and that’s just how I feel. and I’ll love her and care for her#valiant efforts to do so at the very least.#I would dead serious uproot my life in Georgia and move to Cali to be with her. at the drop of a pen I’ll be going breakneck speed down I-10#just to feel her pelt my face with spit while she holds hands with the sweet boy she met.#I am a deeply depraven creature starved of any intimate connection. the one woman I know I could have that with doesn’t want me.#and I’ll let it go. I have to. there has to be more. I’m worthy and I know it.#it’s hard to internalize and know that. that’s where the work needs to be done.
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Arcane Characters Make Food for You
Pairing: Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Maddie, Ekko, Vander, Silco, Sevika, Viktor, Jayce, Mel x Fem!Reader
Tags: fluff, established relationship, domestic fluff, kissing, making food, teasing
Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters
A/N: I already wrote this on my old blog but now is a good time to re-write it.
Jinx knows how to cook pretty well, surprisingly enough. Or maybe not so surprisingly given how she's always the one making things and experimenting. However that also means she might make some really weird meals.
It's something you'll have to deal with if you're with her and might have to develop a strong stomach. She already has it because she grew up in Zaun and ate a lot of different things. For you she wouldn't recommend some of them yet and she will try her best to make something that you'll like. And she won't get too offended if you don't eat her cooking right away.
"I made ya some breakfast, ta-da! It's a little sticky but don't worry, eat your fill and I'll clean up the mess later. Don't look at it like that, it might not look pretty but I promise ya it's so good. I could eat this every day. I hope I'll get to eat it together it with ya every day, sugar."
Vi doesn't know how to cook because she never had the opportunity to learn. The first few dishes are bad, like really bad, almost burn the toast and eggs type of bad but Vi she isn't the kind of person to give up. She'll keep trying until she gets it right.
There have been times where she did burn things and she won't let you eat it since it's not right. She wants you to have the best of the best, even if she didn't. Might get a little distracted when you're in the kitchen with her so she prefers to cook by herself even if you're there with her. Regardless of how many times she gets it wrong she at least wants to learn to cook your favorite.
"Yes, this is burned toast but this time it's not my fault, it's yours. Well you're the one who walked in here looking all cute and distracted me. One kiss is all it takes if it's from you, sweet stuff. Sit down and let me do this right and if you do you'll get something sweeter than this."
Caitlyn knows how to cook really well. She did grow up with people doing the cooking for her however she was curious and wanted to learn how to do it on her own. She's a very hand-on learner, now she can use some of her skills to make you happy.
She gets up really early anyways so she might as well make breakfast for the both of you. The first time she brings you breakfast in bed she thinks your reaction is cute, the way you stare at her, eyes wide and drooling over the food. For her it's not odd to have breakfast in bed. And if you stick with her you'll get used to her pampering you. Be sure to tell her how the food tastes.
"Good morning, darling, I brought you something. See, I didn't just brag about my cooking skills, this is me showing you I can cook. Showing off? Suppose I am a little bit, it's not my fault you didn't really think I would bring you breakfast in bed."
Maddie can cook some dishes but she can cook them well. Her skills aren't anything impressive but they don't need to be because she can get take out too. But she is more than happy to share what ever she makes with you.
She falls back on take out more often than she would like to admit. However not when she invites you over to her place, then she will put her best foot forward. A lot of that is because she wants to impress you hard, but it also gets her to work on her skills either way she wins. She keeps looking at you very intently while you take that first bite. Thankfully she doesn't seem to do a bad job if your smile is anything to go by.
"I'm not weird for watching you eat, it's called being smitten, gorgeous. Anything you do is interesting to me, you know that by now. This isn't empty flattery. I already got you to eat my cooking, I don't need to butter you up at this point."
Ekko isn't the best cook out there, he will be completely honest with you. While he does know the basic things you can't really expect anything fancy. If anything he focuses more on the dish being filling than tasty.
The thing about him cooking for the two of you is that he can only do it on his free time, which isn't a lot. Therefore he wants to make it a bonding activity. A cute date of sorts, mostly in the late evening when the rest of work is done. Sometimes he will try to surprise you but its hard when his living space isn't that big and everyone knows everything in the Firelights. The gesture counts.
"There wasn't much time so it's pretty simple, but at least it's your favorite, Firefly. No, I actually finished the new project, I had extra time to kill. Please, don't thank me! It seemed only right for me to make you something after you cheered me up this morning."
Vander knows how to cook really, really well. He kids to raise, and he was on his own for a very long time, he had to become a good cook. Plus he makes awesome drinks, being a good cook was a bonus skill for him.
He's always the first one to wake up and start the day in the Last Drop and he always makes breakfast for everyone. Not just breakfast but every meal, his kids need to eat a lot, there's always a little left over for later. Even if he feels a little sleepy himself he at least wants to put something on the table. It's the dad instincts in him. And husband instincts, hopefully.
"Don't ya even think about sneaking up on me right now, darlin'. I've got a pan full of sizzling hot oil in my hand, I don't want it all over us. Hugs are fine, I always love ya being close to me, but keep your hands to yourself. We both know ya get handsy in the morning."
Silco didn't know how to cook before he adopted Jinx, since then he's had to learn. It wasn't easy but now he does know a lot and he can impress the woman he's dating. Now when you stay over you can expect good for for your date, and good food when you wake up.
When the dating gets more serious he lets you help him cook, but until then he pretty much does it on his own. Jinx will go nowhere near the kitchen alone, not after that one explosion. He does have a list of recipes that he makes the most. And a few that he made up. Sometimes ingredients are hard to come by so he needs to improvise.
"Pass me the flour would you, love? This time I will follow the recipe, yes, the last time there was a bit too much sugar in there. I know you liked it but it's not the healthiest thing now is it? Fine, call me a worried dad, I know you think it's attractive."
Sevika isn't able too cook that well, she never was, she always liked others cooking for her though. However when you tease her about it she takes it as a challenge. And you know damn well that she doesn't back down from a challenge.
Curses a lot when she messes up, though you can bet that she's not gonna let food be the thing that beats her. When you walk into the kitchen it's a mess which will take a while to clean up. But at least she managed to make the dish this time and it's quite good. For her hard work you give her a very passionate kiss and that just makes her wanna work harder. That's the best reward she can ask for.
"One kiss for at that work, doll? I think I earned myself a little more than that, maybe you on the table instead of all this food. Yeah, I know it's gonna get cold, you're right. Can't let all this hard work go to waste, but when we're done we have to work all that food off."
Viktor doesn't have as much time to cook as he could if he worked a bit less. Not that his skills are award worthy but he can make a few things, at least in his opinion. Give his cooking a chance.
When he was a student in the academy he had to learn how to make quick meals and that is where most of his strength is. Just very simple dishes but he knows how to make them well. There are times when he himself forgets to eat so he makes sure he gets a good meal when he can. If you're part of that that's even better. Having you eat his cooking makes cooking more fun.
"If you think cooking this is so easy then you make it will you, beautiful? Ah so now you like it, I see how it is. I'm just kidding, I love making food for you when I can. But if you want to make it yourself please let me do a taste test first. I promise to be brutally honest, just like you are with me."
Jayce has absolutely no skills in the kitchen unless you need him to fix or build things in there. He knows this too and will admit it right away. Trust him he is much better in science than in cooking food.
That being said he will join you in the kitchen when you cook. He takes an interest in it because the way you cook makes his mouth water. When he learns about what your favorite food is he wants to lean how to cook it. However he does this in secret because he wants to surprise you. Sure enough he's able to get the biggest smile out of you when he presents you with your favorite meal.
"I learned it secretly, all for you, babe. Well I am quite good with my hands and I enjoy working, that was just another excuse to learn. Of course I don't have an ulterior motive for it! But if I did... and if it was kissing... would you kiss me for doing a good job?"
Mel is actually an amazing cook and knows a ton of recipes. Including your favorites of course. Do you really think she'd invite you over and offer you nothing to eat?
It's been a long time since she had to cook for anyone but herself but she's not bad at it at all. She has high standards when it comes to good food specifically because she holds herself to high standards. It doesn't matter how simple or complicated the meal is. When she invites you over and offers to make you food you better believe you're eating good that night. Not strictly food either.
"Beloved, slow down a little, the food isn't going anywhere and neither am I. We have all night. Every time I make food I do so because I want to enjoy a good meal, and you should too. And please be careful, I don't want you to choke, on the food that is."
#arcane x reader#jinx x reader#vi x reader#caitlyn x reader#maddie x reader#ekko x reader#vander x reader#silco x reader#sevika x reder#viktor x reader#jayce x reader#mel x reader#arcane imagine#arcane headcanon#arcane fluff#arcane x you#league of legends x reader#league of legends imagine#league of legends headcanons#league of legends fluff#league of legends x you#arcane x female reader#league of legends x female reader#x female reader#arcane#league of legends
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Hi! I saw that your request box was open. Could I request a Alastor x fem!reader who is a mornigstar, charlie's older sister and she is engaged with Alastor. In episode 5, Dad beat Dad, I thought their relationship is kept secret and was revealed later on shocking lucifer and their friends
Dad beat Fiancé beat Dad
Pairings: Alastor x Fem!Reader / Alastor x Morningstar!Reader Tags: hurt/comfort, (a little bit of) fluff, secret relationship/engagement, Alastor vs Lucifer, Morningstar!Reader, Fem!Reader Warnings: language/swearing, kiss, argument/bickering, reader is Charlie’s older sister, English is not my first language! Summary: You are Charlie's older sister and secretly engaged to Alastor. When your sister invites your father to the hotel to ask for his help with her rehabilitation program, you look forward to his arrival. However, things take a turn when tensions escalate between your father and your fiancé, leading to heated bickering. Overcome with frustration, you finally lash out and accidentally reveal your engagement to the King of Hell and the hotel's residents. Wordcount: 5.4k A/N: This one turned out so long! I really hope you like it and that the story meets your expectations! English is not my first language so I want to apologize for possible grammar and spelling mistakes. I really tried my best to make as few mistakes as possible!
“Well, I’m actually running a hotel to rehabilitate sinners. Maybe you saw our commercial,” you heard your younger sister speak into the telephone, releasing a nervous chuckle here and there. Then a sigh escaped her lips. “Listen, dad, I’ve got kind of a big ask…” You stood a few feet away and stared at her, unsure what to think of this whole idea. Was it really that smart to ask your father to organize another meeting with heaven? The last one already didn’t end well. But what other choice was left for you? Still, it released a weird feeling inside your guts, now that you watched Charlie calling your dad, since your and your sister’s relationships with him were kind of… special. Your father tended to distance himself from the both of you for the most time, bathing in his own emotional dilemma and not even trying to do anything about it. Thus neglecting the both of you. Well, at least he called your sister five months ago regarding that meeting with Adam in heaven’s local embassy. But when it comes to you it’s been even longer since you’ve talked. Maybe a year? Or even longer. You didn’t actually know and also some part within you didn’t even want to. But what you knew is that you missed him. Although, in contradiction, you weren’t really fond of him at the moment. It’s not that you didn’t love him. He was your father, regardless, and you both shared a lot of wholesome and fun memories. But since your mother had left him seven years ago, things had turned out strange and you didn’t really approve of his weird-ass behavior towards you and your sister. Still, you hoped your father would agree to help you out. Maybe, just maybe, there was a probability that you saw him again. You had so much to tell him. Your life has changed a lot since you started supporting your sister in the hotel. And even before, when you met Alastor…
Lost in your thoughts you missed parts of the phone call and as your consciousness returned to reality, you saw your sister taking the phone down and ending the call. Curious about the outcome you cocked your head. “What did he say?”
“Well,” Charlie stared at an empty space for a brief moment, “it seems that dad will be coming over.”
Your mouth fell agape and your eyes widened in surprise. “Wait, really?” you asked her and a huge smile grew on your face. “That’s awesome! When?”
Charlie proudly straightened her back and stemmed her hands into her hips. “We have an hour until he gets here.”
You turned around to face the other residents who sat on the couch and raised your voice, “Okay people. Dad’s on his way, so we’re getting this place presentable and we are all going to make an amazing impression. Let’s go!”
That’s when Vaggie spoke up, “That’s a great idea! Husker, Angel and I will go get some decorations for the lobby,” her eyes wandered down to Niffty, “Niffty, you and Sir Pentious will bake some cookies so we have something to eat when it’s time for coffee.”
Nifty nodded exaggeratedly, almost vibrating from that force she put into her motion. She instantly grabbed Sir Pentious’s hand and dragged him down the hallway towards the kitchen. When Husker, Angel and Vaggie went to get the decorations from the storage room you and Charlie were left alone.
“Are you as excited as I am?” You asked her with a moving voice and examined your sister expectantly. It was no secret that Charlie took that whole situation with your father a bit differently from you. While you almost imploded waiting to get a chance to meet him again, your sister was more reserved and kept herself a bit more distant from him. Even though she was the one your father seemed to favor when it came to dealing with the conflict with heaven. It didn’t matter that you were the older daughter…
“Ahm… I don’t know,” Charlie responded nervously stroking her neck, “I mean, yes, I am. But at the same time…” She hesitated and you put your hand on her shoulder.
“Don’t worry, sis. I can understand,” you reassured her with a calm voice and smiled at her with genuine eyes. You could feel her shoulders relax under your supporting gesture.
“Thank you,” she responded and returned your smile. “It’s just… You know, since he and mom split, I often don’t feel like his daughter anymore. Yet he sounded very excited to come over.”
You took a deep breath and removed your hand from her shoulder. “We’ll see how things are going when he arrives.”
Charlie chuckled. “Well, I think you should go and inform Alastor about our special guest,” she requested, raising her eyebrows in concern. Charlie was the only person at the hotel who knew about your secret relationship with him. When you decided to knock on the door to propose your support to your sister, you and Alastor were already dating. In fact, you were the one who dragged him here because – regardless of his fearful and sketchy reputation – you knew he’d make a great hotelier and protector for the residents during future exterminations. But you both didn’t introduce yourselves as a couple right away. Instead, you found common ground in letting your sister know but keeping it hidden from the other residents. There were several reasons you both had decided against making your relationship public: Alastor’s reputation as the Radio Demon, yours as Lucifer’s oldest daughter, the gossip, the media… These and many more were all things you didn’t want to deal with. Especially since Alastor was a very private person who despised showing affection outside his private space and you, as a person who had no desire to brag about your partner, were totally fine with it. What happened in private chambers stayed in private chambers. That was your agreement, and if you let your friends know about your relationship, there would be too much risk that it would eventually become public. The only other person next to Charlie, and outside the hotel, who knew about your and Alastor’s connection, was his decades-long friend Rosie.
Repeating your sister's request in your head you nodded in agreement. It was the best to prepare Alastor. Even though an hour alone wouldn’t be long enough for him to digest the fact that he was about to meet your father. “Oh, I think he’ll be excited about the news,” you responded with a sarcastic tone and couldn’t help but release a malicious laugh. Oh, how much he will hate this...
You heard Charlie laughing along and shaking her head in amusement. But as quickly as the amusement appeared, it disappeared as you continued to think about the fact that Alastor was actually going to meet your father. With a deep breath you dropped your smile and lowered your voice. “Do you think it would be a good idea to tell dad about Alastor and me?”
“Ahm…” Charlie seemed to think about it more carefully before commenting, “I actually don’t know… I wish I could tell you but that’s something you and Alastor have to decide. First of all, I’d wait until after they had their first impressions of each other. Then… maybe… introduce him to the truth? I mean, if you and Alastor plan to stay together, what I hope – I mean… It’s obvious, why else would you date if it isn’t for staying together?” She chuckled at how much she was lost in her words and cleaned her throat. “I’m sorry. What I mean to say is that it would be beneficial for your shared future if you let dad know. At least at some point in the future.”
You nodded in understanding and gifted her a slight smile. “Thank you. Maybe I’ll talk to him about this later. First of all, I need to prepare him for meeting his soon-to-be father in law.” You laughed and excused yourself before you left the lobby and went upstairs.
When you arrived at Alastor’s radio station you knocked on the door.
“You may come in!” you heard Alastor’s dulled voice through the door and opened it. When you entered the radio station you immediately saw him sitting at his desk, leaning over some papers and holding a pen in his hand. When you closed the door, he placed the pen to the side and turned to look at you.
“Why hello, darling,” he greeted you, his signature smile on his face but his red eyes revealing a neutral expression. “What brings you here?”
“Well...” You took a deep breath and strolled towards him with your hands folded behind your back and your lips pressed to your teeth. “I’ve got some news for you that you’ll probably hate.”
“Oh?” he responded curiously and tilted his head to the side. His red hair swayed with the movement.
You arrived at his desk and leaned against the tabletop, your front mostly faced towards him. You tilted your head in the same direction as he did and couldn’t manage to suppress an amused smile. “My dad will be here in less than an hour,” you said with a cocky voice and watched Alastors expression shift as his lips curled up around his smile and his eyes immediately twitched. An awkward silence fell over the room before he broke it with a snippy tone, “You’re right. I hate that news.” His neck returned to a straight and more natural position and you chuckled.
“Vaggie’s the one to blame. She came up with the idea that Charlie should call him to ask for help because she could no longer bear seeing my sister ripping her hair out in despair over her missing rehabilitation success,” you explained and a growl escaped Alastor’s throat. He already didn't like Vaggie and now he probably liked her even less.
“Splendid,” he said without enthusiasm and stood up from his chair, grabbing his microphone cane and leaning on it. Now taller than you, you had to tilt your head back to be able to look him in the eyes. “How about I excuse myself and disappear for another set of seven years?”
“Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,” you responded, raised your index finger and waved it in front of him. “You will stand your ground and behave. It’s just my dad.”
“He’s the king of hell, darling.”
“And that's why you'll be going down there and prove to him that you're a worthy partner for his princess daughter.”
He gritted his teeth and your smile widened as you nonchalantly brushed the wrinkles out of his coat.
“Are you questioning my abilities, darling?” He asked, placing one of his hands on top of yours, thus stopping your movements and squeezing it.
You felt your cheeks blush at his affectionate action and stepped closer to him, your body now close enough that it almost touched his. You could feel the warmth radiating off him and tilted your head slightly, your eyes still locked with his. “No, I’m not. And that’s exactly why I want you to do as I said.”
“Oh, is her dear royal highness misusing her mightiness to give me an order?” he asked with a low and unusually soft voice and a shiver ran down your spine. Oh, how you loved it when he became flirty. His charm was able to captivate you instantly, weakening your legs and waking those tingling butterflies in your stomach. He removed your hands from his coat and pulled you closer to him. Your body now touching his, you felt the urge to rest your head into the crook of his neck but resisted.
“She indeed is. And you better behave, peasant,” you teased him back and Alastor narrowed his eyes at you degrading him like this.
He let go of one of your hands and instead cupped your cheek before using his fingers to lift your chin up. “You seem to forget that I’m your finacé”, he purred, leaning in closer until only a few inches separated your noses from touching. His hot breath stroked your face and you could’ve sworn that his eyes had turned to a darker hue.
Without further hesitation he pulled you into a tender kiss. His lips brushed over yours and you leaned in closer, succumbing yourself completely to him. Your free hand roamed up and slid through his hair, pressing his face closer to yours. After a few moments of togetherness both of you let go of each other.
“We should return to the foyer. My dad can arrive any minute,” you said and stroked his cheek before heading towards the door. You could hear Alastor sigh behind you.
“Just as a reminder: I can’t promise you things will go well.”
You rolled your eyes as you left the radio station together. “At least try.”
After you entered the foyer most preparations were already done and it didn’t take long until your father arrived. Your body was shaking from excitement as you and Charlie went up to the door and your sister opened it.
"Charlie!,” your father shouted with joy. A huge grin sat on his face and his yellow eyes sparkled as his gaze fell on your sister who stood much closer to him. He held out his arms and approached her, pulling her into a hug. “It’s so good to see you!”
“It’s good to see you too, dad,” Charlie pressed through the tight hug of her father, overwhelm and a little bit of uncomfort in her expression.
When Lucifer let go of her his eyes fell on you. "Y/N! You’re here too?” his pupils dilated in surprise and you immediately found yourself wrapped in his arms as well.
“Dad!” you greeted him as you placed your hands around his torso and squeezed, the soft fragrance of his cologne entering your nose. He smelled the same he always did, the scent taking you back to the past when your family was still together and healthy. It was wonderful to be this close to him after such a long time and you wished this moment could last longer. You looked to the side and saw Alastor standing near your sister. But what you didn’t see was one of his eyes twitching at your father’s gesture.
You let go of each other and Charlie held out her hand, spinning and pointing at the lobby. “Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!”
The other residents greeted him with waving hands from afar and your father smiled back at them, walking through the lobby and letting his gaze wander around. “Wow, this place looks, uh…” he twisted his mouth in an unpleasant manner and frowned, searching for the right words. He chuckled nervously and you and Charlie exchanged glances as he stammered around, turning to the side and surveying the establishment as if he was a property inspector. You could tell that nervousness spread across Charlie’s face as she probably hoped his words wouldn’t be too dismissive. You shrugged your shoulders at her to dismiss your father’s unsettling behavior and followed him.
“What do you think, dad?” you dared to ask him in hopes he’d come up with a response a little faster if you pushed on him a little.
“It’s got a lot of character,” he eventually said and winched with a squeak when he turned around and laid eyes on the bar. “What in the unholy hell is that?” he asked repulsively and pointed to the swampy-looking counter decorated with skulls and two full snake skeletons wrapped around the poles. The green wood paneling disrupted the noble red wallpaper of the looby, making it appear like an eyesore amidst the otherwise mostly luxurious decor.
A dark shadow crawled around the floor and took the form of Alastor who appeared right next to him. “Just some of the renovations we had done! ” he explained, pointing his cane at the bar, his signature smile wide and confident before he turned towards Lucifer and leaned on his cane. “Adds a bit of color, don’t you think?”
“And you are?” Lucifer asked with raised eyebrows, a skeptical tone in his voice.
You, again, exchanged glances with Charlie and held your breath. The moment has come in which your father and your financé had their first contact and somehow you got the feeling that this won’t end well. Your sister seemed to be fearing the same and she stepped closer to you. Her presence calmed your tension at least a little.
“Alastor,” your finacé introduced himself, “Pleasure to be meeting you, sir. Quite a pleasure!” He shook your fathers hand and you could see the disapproval in both their eyes, before they let go. Your father grimaced while Alastor wiped his hands over his coat.
This most definitely won’t end well. But before you and Charlie could say something, Alastor continued, “It’s nice to finally put a face to the name. You are much shorter in real life.”
You breathed in sharply. Your father didn’t seem to take his comment well as his expression immediately turned to annoyance. You and Charlie both approached them, your sister standing next to your father while you kept closer to Alastor. You really hoped that he’d notice your disapproval over how things were going and slow down a bit. But you knew him well enough to be sure he wouldn’t notice the tension in the room and also wouldn't care if he did.
“Who is this?” your father asked, his eyes fixated on the demon before him. “Who’s this now? Are you the bellhop?”
Alastor laughed in response. “No! I’m the host of the hotel. You might’ve heard of me from my radio broadcast,” he explained.
Your father pretended to ponder his words for a very short moment but then denied with a derogatory snort. “Nope! I guess that’s why Charlie called it the ‘Hazbin Hotel’?” He laughed at his pun, this time more maliciously. The tension grew stronger and you didn’t even realize that you held your breath and pressed your fists so tightly together that your nails painfully stung your palms. Your sister, on the other hand, nervously rubbed her hands.
Hiding his offense, Alastor piled into your father’s laughter, “It was actually my idea.”
“Well, it’s not very clever!” your father responded, increasing his laugh.
Alastor did the same and leaned in closer, “Fuck you.”
“Alastor!” you yelled at him in shock and disbelief over his rude words and took him by his arm, dragging him to the side while your sister shoved your father into the other direction.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” you scolded him with a lowered voice to keep your conversation as private as possible. He’d never been someone who cussed so why did he have to do this now of all times?
“He started it,” Alastor explained, keeping his face turned in the other direction to avoid eye contact.
You breathed in sharply, anger boiling within you as you hissed, “I don’t care about who did what. You were supposed to make a good impression!”
“Excuse me, dear, but it seems that your father and I don’t get along. And this seems to be based on mutuality. I don’t know if you noticed this but he already looked at me disapprovingly before we even exchanged words.”
Oh, you did notice this. But you didn’t care because in this moment it was important for both of them to at least pretend to tolerate each other. You couldn’t afford your father and your finacé to already disembowel each other during their first encounter. Important aspects of your shared future relied on their correlation. And… Was Alastor even listening to you?!
You snatched his cane out of his hands and spinned it around.
Alastor finally turned to look at you, his teeth gritted and his eyebrows pushed together. His gaze became softer as he eyed your expression but he still seemed tense.
“You’ll put this right, Alastor. Or otherwise…” You don’t finish your sentence and instead poke the pointy end of his cane between his ribs.
“Fine,” he growled and took his cane back.
You both turned around and saw Charlie pushing your father in your direction, her arm resting on his shoulder while she talked to him insistently with a calm but worried voice, “Without Alastor, we wouldn’t have been able to pretty it up this much!”
Alastor took a step closer, tapping his fingertips on his cane. “Charlie has a very unique vision,” he started and stood next to her, forcing himself to sound as honest and courteous as possible, “I am happy to fulfill her bizarre requests.”
“Thank you, Alastor”, your sister responded, ignoring your frowning father who looked anything but amused.
Alastor continued, “Quite an impressive young lady. We’re all very proud of her.” He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and Charlie gave him a genuine smile before he let go and turned towards you. “And her sister, Y/N, well…” He laid his red eyes on you with a genuine and almost loving smile and rested his hand on your shoulder, squeezing it slightly in an almost unnoticeable but reassuring manner. “She’s an extraordinary being. Introduced me to this very special place so we can give her sister all the support and assistance she needs.”
You smiled at him, grateful that he followed your request to at least try to make things right.
Your father growled and narrowed his eyes as he noticed the way Alastor looked at you, the demon’s hand on your shoulder triggering his already strained nerves. He snatched his head in the other direction to face your sister. “Charlie… Why don’t you introduce me to your other friends?”
“Oh, yes, of course!” she called out and walked up to the other residents. “This is Vaggie. She’s my girlfriend!” She pulled Vaggie with her who shyly raised her hand in a reserved greeting gesture.
Your father laughed and his mood immediately switched from annoyance to excitement. “Oh my golly! You like girls? So do I! We have so much in common!” He pulled Vaggie in a rushed embrace, letting her go as fast as he got close to her. “She’s beautiful!”
You felt your heart sink in your chest at your father’s opposite reaction to your sister’s partner and a strike of anxiety hit you at the thought of telling him the truth about you and Alastor. It wasn’t only the fact you both were a couple that made you this insecure but the fact that you were even engaged to him.
Alastor seemed to sense your inner tension and squeezed your shoulder again, now with more pressure and you were grateful for him that he hadn’t removed his hand yet. His closeness was exactly what you needed at this moment. You moved a bit closer to him, hoping that you both didn't appear too close in the other eyes, and breathed in his scent while your thoughts raced in your head. You reviewed the events again and realized that Alastor was right. You had little reason to be so angry (only) at him because your father didn’t really behave either from the first second. Hopefully you could somehow dismiss this conflict as a matter of miscommunication between them.
You watched your sister introduce your father to the other residents which he seemed to get along with very well – contrary to your finacé who seemed to be the only one he immediately despised.
You sighed and that’s when your father turned around to face the lobby. With a determined expression he raised his voice so everybody could hear him, “Well, it looks like I could give you some help. With a little bit of alakazam,” he wiggled his fingers, indicating a magic spell, “we could turn this place into something much more appealing! I mean, who needs a busboy now that you got the chef?” He faced Alastor with narrowed eyes and poked his elbow teasingly into Charlie’s side.
You could feel Alastor’s grip on your shoulder tightening. His smile turned into a strained grin as he obviously thought about saying something. You begged that he kept his mouth shut to not reinforce their conflict…
“Well, Charlie…” your father continued before Alastor could even say something, “I’m not almighty but I could give you a lot. Almost anything, if you ask for it. You know, normally, I’d charge a lot for my help but since you’re my daughter and I love you with all my heart, it’s a matter of course I do it for free. Unlike that sketchy prick who probably has some devious intentions in his mind.” He raised his cane and pointed at Alastor.
Charlie blinked a few times and pressed a nervous and drawled ‘Thank you…’ through her uncomfortable smile. It was obvious that she didn’t approve of your father’s comment but she also didn’t want to increase the drama by intervening.
Alastor took his hand off your shoulder and leaned on his cane. “At least I’ve been here from the start,” he commented and eyed his claws with a hint of arrogance.
You breathed in sharply but tried your best to keep your patience up as Alastor continued his monologue. “Let's not forget that I’ve always been faithful to you, Charlie. I support you, care for you and this hotel, and execute whatever you demand”, he exclaimed with such confidence that it was almost awkward listening to him.
“That’s true,” your sister responded carefully with a grateful smile on her face and your father rolled his eyes. “You know, dad, Alastor does a lot for the hotel and its residents.”
“No matter his capabilities, because sometimes, Charlie, there’s no substitute for pure angelic power, which – not to forget – also happens to be your blood!”
“Dad…” Charlie sighed and you growled, the anger cooking inside of you.
“Sadly, there are times a birth parent is a dud,” Alastor interfered again, his grin still as prominent as always but his eyes narrowed, darting invisible arrows at Lucifer. He straightens his back to appear even taller in comparison to your father, the arrogance undeniable in his expression. “Seems like the family you chose is better.”
“You’re such a loser!” your dad spat out.
“And yet here you are proving me right with every word you speak,” Alastor snatched back.
“You know nothing, you prick!”
“Well, unlike you, I don’t abandon my responsibilities!”
“How do you dare question my commitment?”
“At least I care for your daughters.”
“Oh you tacky little piece of–!”
You jumped between them. “Shut the fuck up! Both of you!”
you yelled as your anger burst through the walls you’ve tried to maintain hold of. Your voice cracked with the strain of suppressed fury and your appearance began to morph into a much more demonic form as pointy horns grew out of your head and your eyes turned a gleaming bloody red. “I’m sick of you bickering like children, you fucking attention whores! Is this how you get your kicks, by not being able to keep your mouths shut over such trivial nonsense? Do you even realize how goddamn irritating it is for the rest of us to be subjected to your constant squabbling? You know each other for ten minutes and already start pushing each other to the limits!”
“Y/N–,” Alastor tried to interrupt you but you stretched out your arm, pushing him away from you.
“No, Alastor, back the fuck off!” you scream, looking up in his red eyes and poking his chest angrily with your index finger. “Everytime I tell you to keep your shit together and make a good impression, you make things worse!”
Your head snatches around and you now stare at your father with the same fury in your eyes. “And you, dad, stop your irresponsible nonsense and don’t taunt him as if he were a punching bag for your own insecurities!” Now you poke at your father’s chest, towering over him with floating hair and fire in your eyes. “Because Alastor’s right! Where have you been all the time? Instead of helping us and supporting Charlie in her project, you didn't even contact us! Especially not me! The last time I heard from you was over a year ago! And now you come here, finally ready to help your daughters, and the moment you arrive you start lashing out at my fiancé to deflect from your own mistakes because you can't stand the fact that he was there for us while you preferred to wallow yourself in your depression!”
Silence fell over the room when you finished your rant, all eyes locked on you in shock and disbelief over your courage to attack the Radio Demon and the King of Hell himself in such a manner. Your heart raced, pumped your blood through your veins with such a pressure that you felt your whole body pulsating under your tension as relief washed over you.
“Y–,” your dad tried to say, stuttering and completely overwhelmed by your confrontation and what you just revealed to him. “You–, Your… fiancé?” He ripped his eyes open, his mouth agape in disbelief.
You breathed in heavily and closed your eyes for a brief moment, realizing what you just revealed, before you opened them again and responded to his question with a much calmer but also weak and tired voice, “Yes, dad. Alastor is my fiancé.”
“What the fuck?” you could hear Angel exclaim in the background but ignored him.
“Well…” your father hesitated. He struggled hard to find the right words and put his hand over his mouth, rubbing his skin like a stress ball. “Well, I’m… Wow…”
Alastor approached you, his steps echoing from the high walls in the silent room and he put his hand on your shoulder. Feeling his touch through your blouse, caused a jolt of electricity to rush through your body. It erased the rest of your anger and your appearance returned to your normal form. Alastor’s presence calmed you down to an almost relaxed state. You felt the need to lean on him but resisted because everything that just happened was already enough – for you, for your father, your fiancé and all the other residents who were forced to witness this nerve-wrecking spectacle.
You watched your father’s gaze roam over Alastor’s presence, from his head to his toes and from his toes back to his head.
“I–, I don’t know what to say… Uh… I–... I’m speechless,” he stuttered, unable to look away from the man that stood next to you and encouraged you with a little but meaningful gesture and with who you wanted to spend the rest of eternity with. “I–, excuse me. I need some time to think.”
Your father indicated to turn around and leave as your sister grabbed him by his arm, holding him back. “Would you like me to give you a tour around the hotel?” she asked him reassuringly in hope he would agree, what he then did.
“Yes. Please.”
Your sister gave you an encouraging look before she turned around and guided your father towards the stairs, Vaggie following right after to accompany them.
Now, you and Alastor were alone with Angel Dust, Sir Pentious, Husk and Niffty. All of them stared at you, speechless. Especially Husk appeared a bit traumatized by your accidental announcement.
“So… Mister fancy-talk-creepy-voice managed to slide into the royal family?” Angel asked you with interest but you raised your hand, interrupting him.
“Stop it, Angel.”
The spider demon pressed his lips together in a thin line and hummed.
You turned towards Alastor. “Are you mad?” you asked him, afraid that you damaged his trust by revealing your biggest secret you had sworn to keep.
Alastor leaned his head down sideways to look you in the eyes. His grin was replaced by a genuine smile as his red eyes surveyed your expression. “It’s alright, my dear.”
He looked over to the other residents, walking a few steps closer to them and cocked his head in an unnatural and unnerving way. His antlers grew in size with pointy ends while his eyes changed to a black color with red, moving radio dials as irises. “If you dare say a single word about mine and Y/N’s relationship outside of the hotel, I will tear you apart and hang your guts as flags on the hotel roof so everybody will be able to see what happens if you dare gossip about the radio demon and his lady.”
*****
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