#kind of mad at myself that I want to pull him after reading the event

[coffeecakecatt]

A Takasugi I drew for my partner. He was incredibly fun in the GudaGuda event.

[slut4nicholas]

𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙊𝙏𝙃𝙀𝙍 𝙒𝙊𝙈𝘼𝙉 | 𝙉𝙄𝘾𝙃𝙊𝙇𝘼𝙎 𝘼𝙇𝙀𝙓𝘼𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍 𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙑𝙀𝙕

a/n: if you are not comfortable reading about things like this i highly recommend you to find another fic, remember this is all just fanfiction!! im not trying to make nicholas seem like a bad person at all! enjoy.

warnings: infidelity, alcohol, degrading, mentions of sex.

summary: in a whirlwind of passion and betrayal, nicholas finds himself entangled in a thrilling affair with his assistant, sparking an irresistible magnetism that pulls them together despite his commitment to another.

✮⋆˙

𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗪𝗢𝗠𝗔𝗡 𝗪𝗜𝗟𝗟 𝗔𝗟𝗪𝗔𝗬𝗦 𝗖𝗥𝗬 𝗛𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗘𝗟𝗙 𝗧𝗢 𝗦𝗟𝗘𝗘𝗣 | as i settled into the comfort of my couch to watch the dazzling red carpet event from home since i couldn’t make it, but nothing could dull the ache in my chest. my heart twisted painfully as i watched him, arm casually draped around her waist, throwing his head back in laughter, seemingly oblivious to the tempest of emotions churning within me. each smile he flashed felt like a cruel dagger, piercing deeper with every carefree moment shared between them. It was as if the universe relished in my pain, turning what should have been a relaxing evening into a bittersweet reminder of everything i wished i could have.

nick and i started dating four months ago, but i had been his assistant for a year before that. it began with him driving me home, flirtatious banter, and sweet compliments. then, one day, he asked me out to dinner i said yes, heart racing but cautious—i didn’t want to jeopardize our friendship or my job. but as always, my feelings muddled things. now, here I am, torn between love and the fear of losing what we had.

with every passing moment, i sat there, my eyes glued to the screen, unable to look away from the intimate glances between him and her. a storm of emotions surged within me—guilt gnawed at my insides, pain clawed at my heart, jealousy turned my thoughts into a tempest, and anger simmered just below the surface. i loved him fiercely, yet a bitter truth settled like a stone in my chest: he loved her in a way that seemed to eclipse the affection he had for me. no I told myself desperately, he must love me too!

but deep down, i understood; he cherished the way i surrendered to him, how i let him seize control, how my body yielded to his desires—making his fantasies come alive in every forbidden moment. yet, as i clung to these fractured memories, i couldn’t shake the feeling that in his heart, i was simply a fleeting thrill, while she was the one who captivated his soul.

as he walked up to receive the award for his latest film, the glimmer of the trophy seemed overshadowed by the unquenchable ache in my heart. she enveloped him in a vibrant embrace, her lips brushing against his with the kind of familiarity that gnawed at my insides, a cruel reminder that i was merely a spectator in a story where i had once imagined myself the lead.

yes, she was stunning, and jealousy twisted like a knife in my gut, but i knew deep down that no one could love him the way i did, kiss him with the same fervor, or understand his soul as intimately as i had. the urge to reach for my phone, to shatter the moment and reclaim the love i felt slipping away, loomed large, yet i fought it back with all my strength. i couldn’t bear the thought of ruining his triumph; the very thought of his disappointment was a weight too heavy to carry.

i respected him far too much to make that call, even if it meant watching the life we could have had slip further from my grasp, knowing he might never forgive me for the chaos my heart yearned to unleash.

with a sigh, i switched off the tv, realizing i couldn’t bear another second of them on my screen—it was slowly driving me mad. this was my day off, after all, a time meant for relaxation! i settled onto the couch, letting the tranquility wash over me, and before i knew it, i drifted off into a peaceful slumber, leaving the world of noise behind.

i was jolted awake by my phone buzzing like a swarm of bees—call after call, text after text. even before glancing at the screen, i knew it was him. a part of me was tempted to answer, to invite him over and dive into whatever chaos awaited us. but instead, i let it ring, savoring the sweetness of my decision to resist the pull of his familiar storm.

just a couple of minutes ticked by when suddenly, a thunderous knock echoed through my stillness, jolting me from my thoughts. my heart raced—why would he be pounding on my door at 3 a.m.? with a heavy sigh, i knew i had to let him in; letting him linger out there was not an option. as i shuffled toward the door, his voice cut through the silence, demanding my attention like a child throwing a tantrum. seriously, he could be so infuriating at times!

as i approached the door to my apartment, nicholas strolled in without so much as a greeting, acting as if he owned the place.

“you don’t see me calling you?”

“no” i lied

“you know you are not a very good liar” he softly scoffed obviously annoyed at me.

i roll my eyes, shutting the door with a sigh as i head back to the couch where I'd been languishing earlier. but before i can even sink into the cushions, nicholas suddenly grabs my wrist, spinning me around to face him with an intensity that catches me off guard.

“what’s wrong with you?” he questioned.

"nothing, nicholas," I reply, crossing my arms defiantly. my body language betrays my words—it's clear that something is bothering me tonight.

"go ahead and keep lying, but i know there's something off about you," he said, stepping closer, his breath reeking of nothing but liquor. in that moment, it became clear to me why he was here.

“nick, i can't believe how far we’ve taken this—did you really think i wasn’t watching i watched you two, locked in your little world, and it felt like you were flaunting it, trying to make me jealous or something. do you get some twisted thrill from taunting me like this? seriously, is this your idea of fun? because it's not just hurtful; it's downright cruel.”

“let’s not start this, i missed you and i just want to spend some time with you”

he took a step closer causing me to push him back a little further.

"absolutely not! i can't keep living like this—i didn't even know she existed until just last month! this whole situation is beyond insane. and remember, you promised me you would leave her! can’t you see how this is tearing me apart?"

with a thunderous sigh, he threw his head back, a storm brewing behind his eyes.

“y/n, I’ve told you a million times—i can’t just abandon her!” his voice echoed, laced with frustration that made my blood boil. “i don’t know what to do, but you know damn well im not trying to hurt you! i have real feelings for you. remember last week when you couldn't even walk straight”

his piercing gaze cut through me. “what’s different now?” my heart raced, a mix of fury and betrayal boiling within me. how could he be so selfish, so blind to my pain? each word was a dagger, and i wasn’t sure how much longer i could endure his twisted logic before i shattered entirely.

i couldn't help but scoff at his ignorant remarks, a bitter laugh escaping my lips. "you're so stupid," i shot back, the words laced with a seething anger i could no longer hide. "i hate you," i added, feeling my heart pound with a mix of frustration and hurt, as every syllable dripped with the weight of my unspoken pain.

with a slurred chuckle, he pushed himself off the couch, swaying slightly as he steadied himself. “you know,” he began, his voice thick with the weight of whiskey-soaked truths, “girls only say they hate you to the guy they really love.” the words hung in the air, punctuated by the flickering of a dim lamp, as if each syllable carried the weight of unspoken confessions and heart-wrenching longing, inviting her to dive deeper into the tangled mess of emotions swirling between them.

my heart swelled as i walked toward him, my face softening with every step, and when he opened his arms, a flood of warmth washed over me. nicholas enveloped me in a tight embrace, his chin resting gently on the crown of my head, and in that moment, all the pain and love i felt for him crashed together.

i was undeniably in love, every flaw etched into my heart, even when he treated me poorly; he was still the one i yearned for. tears brimmed in my eyes, an unstoppable tide of emotion that revealed my heart’s true ache, and he sensed it instantly.

“It’s okay, baby,” he murmured, his voice a soothing balm against my turmoil. “everything will be okay.”

was everything really going to be okay?

✮⋆˙



[bookcub]

Felurian and Consent

content warning for discussions of sexual assault and rape

It had been a while since I have written a meta post for kkc but I just reread Wise Man's Fear and made myself read the Felurian scenes in their entirety.

And wow, am I mad at myself.

I cannot believe I let myself forget the way Kvothe clearly states Felurian breaching consent. The Felurian scene have always been upsetting to me, they never felt consensual, and many interpretations of the book had me thinking that maybe this was just me or just a very small section of the scenes.

But no. Kvothe initially gives consent to Felurian (well, arguably but thats a discussion for another time). He chooses to leave his companions to be with Felurian. And then he wants to leave. when he tells her he wants to leave, this happens: "My mind went numb as quickly as if I'd been struck a blow to the back of my head. . . I felt the need to have her. . .Only because of my Arcane training did I hold onto any concept of my own identity at all." (639)

He has revoked his consent and she had denied him the power to leave. She does not allow him to leave. Kvothe is an object to Felurian. If this is not clear enough in the abuse of power Felurian has, Kvothe then goes on to say he feels as he did when he was in Tarbean and sexually assaulted. "She touched my cheek softly. Softly, I bent to kiss her, and something broke in my mind. I felt the snap as four years of my life slid away. Suddenly I was back on the streets of Tarbean. Three boys bigger than me. . . had dragged me from the broken crate where I'd been sleeping. . . Two of them held me down. The third cut my clothes off my body." (641) Kvothe then describes that he was able to escape but still traumatized from the event. And that his state of mind was similar to how he felt when he was with Felurian. This wakes his sleeping mind, where he finds Felurian's name and finally has the power to leave, but hesitates because he doesn't want to kill her.

Kvothe does not have her name or the wind's name at his beck and call after this moment and persuades Felurian into letting him go by promising to make her famous in his song. He does not have consent to leave at any moment. And while she does show him kindness at moments, she is holding him against his will for most of his time with her.

Yes, he enjoys part of his time with her. Yes, he learns from her. But that does not negate the lack of consent involved with the entire interaction that often goes unnoticed in the fandom. And it would be easy to say an entire relationship was horrible and toxic but instead we see the push and pull of how toxic relationships can have caring moments while still revoking consent. However, the lack of attention people pay to Felurian as an absuer and rapist and how Kvothe is written off as simply "wanting fairy sex" when he literally is not in his right mind when he runs off and then has his ability to leave revoked by Felurian.

My conclusion, I suppose, is to stop writing off the Felurian scenes as frivolous sex scenes and acknowledging the lack of consent that is explicitly addressed and then the underlying threat to Kvothe's safety that persists from Felurian throughout the scenes.

I also suppose the issue of interpretation has many conflicting factors. For example, our patriarchal society doesn't like to view men as victims of sexual assault and women as perpetrators of sexual assault, which is also reflected in Kvothe's world as well, as when he tells the story, men are mostly excited on his behalf and women are rolling their eyes at his story. I think Kvothe's attitude towards it also reflects this. And this is why I think a lot of people misinterpret this scene.

I am interested to hear other people’s thoughts as I am still processing how these scenes were written and interpreted, both by the characters in the book and by fans.

[intotheelliwoods]

@kinky-asexual I love myself having certain colors represent certain themes/events/occasions :) TYSM by the way!!

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I bring you this doodle! @greentrickster

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Dont know why I drew this but here you go. @wraenata Have an emotional support peepaw.

Anyways, Marcus Moncrief was on Saturday Night Live, live!! Donnie was rambling to Leo about the concept of freezing time by reaching absolute 0 in Kelvin :)

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Oh I have been waiting for someone to ask me something like this, you have no idea. Putting this ESSAY under a cut oops I wrote a ton (if the cut even works, sometimes they dont)

I am very aware of the norm of the usual take of Future Leo AU's, it was all those AU's and fics that mad inspired me after all! They are all so good and play on a very interesting concept! Issue is, it ended up being the only take I ended up seeing. With the whole future and present self having some form of resentment towards eachother even if it was just a little bit, or for only a short period of time. I honestly needed a fresh breath of air and it came to my attention as time went on that other readers also needed a breath of fresh air. So uh, I very much saw the opportunity here and took it, with the added bonus of it being in comic form since theres so many fics out there.

Yes my comic is absolutely the opposite of the norm and I plan on keeping it like that, I made it the opposite of the norm for a reason, and the reason definitely shows through the sheer numbers and attention I have been getting on this thing! I am so happy so many people are enjoying the series! I am so glad to heal everyones wounds from the anguish of the usual plotlines haha!

Sidenote, I would actually highly recommend this post by pinetreevillain, read the tags, words things better than I ever could. Not just the OP's tags, all the reblog tags too.

(There may have been fics were the Leos were actually nice to eachother, but either I did not hear of them/see them, or they were just overall not popular enough to be well known and recognized for the good relationship)

I understand that such a fast change in character meanwhile does not happen overnight. This here is probably the biggest issue I have within the series, though I do have a little bit of reasoning.

I am just going to be flat out honest, I personally find it hard for myself to sit and read through something about characters arguing, it makes me weirdly uneasy. Something something about characters who love eachother yelling it out just hits me in a way I try to avoid whoops. So if I find it hard to read something like that, it is even harder for me to write and draw it out myself, there will be no forms of these sorts situations in the series because of that. Though this does tie back into me trying to avoid the norm, having everyone be kind to Leo after the movie is a take you do not see often.

I actually attempted addressing the movie aftermath with Raph and Leo with this comic, it was the whole point on why I made the comic! Because yes! I These two really did need some new take, my own take, on the aftermath. I wanted to show in that comic that Raph is not mad, happy actually, that Leo managed to pull himself together for such an act. Leo proved on that day that he knew what he was doing, how to care for a team, and that he was truly meant for his role as the leader.

Final little point: Lets be honest I dont think anyone will have the guts to even be mad at Leo after he sacrificed himself and his arm to save everyone. How could anyone be mad at that? Outside the fear of loosing him of course

[ponkwan]

⌗ ⸰ ₊⠀ BITTERSWEET !

the one where you and mingyu kiss, but there’s regret after the two of you do.

pairing: mingyu x (f)reader

word count: 0.9k

rating: pg-15

content: ANGST!!!!!!, pining, implied unrequited love; ft. close friend!mingyu

warning/s: profanities, reader is treated like a rebound, mingyu and reader are drunk, sad ending :(

You can tell that he knows it was a mistake the moment he breaks away from the kiss, lips parted before it transforms into a frown, his eyebrows knitting in what seemed like confusion until he fixes his gaze on yours, catching you already looking at his disappointed expression.

“____,” he utters your name slowly, still in disbelief of what just happened, “I’m sorry. That… that—I don’t know why I just—”

“It’s okay,” you cut him off, preventing him from saying anything that’ll make your heart break into tinier pieces. “I get it. You’re drunk. You’re not thinking straight.”

He doesn’t say anything to correct your statement. He just backs away from where he has you caged sitting on the kitchen counter, a heavy sigh escaping him while his hands run through his hair. From those gestures alone, it seems that he’s having a quick replay of events and that he’s slowly getting out of his intoxicated state, regret washing over him this instance.

You don’t say anything more in return either. You only remain there on your spot, the burning sensation on your mouth still present despite the reason for its existence no longer being there. You have this sudden urge to touch your lips because of it, to feel where Mingyu’s lips were seconds ago—where his tongue even glided on when he got carried away and went ahead of himself. But you resist the desire to do so, not wanting him to be aware of how this truly affected you which can make him think of this as a bigger deal than he already does.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” he mutters under his breath. “Holy shit. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s fine,” you say, hopping off from your place.

“It’s not.” He looks at you again, though he turns away almost immediately afterwards, perhaps out of guilt. “I just… I just kissed you. I kissed you all of the sudden for fuck’s sake—and because of what? Because I was sad that my ex found someone else? It’s a dick move.”

“It’s fine, Mingyu.”

“It’s not,” he snaps. “Friends don’t pull that shit on each other, you know.”

Your insides churn. Or maybe that’s just the last pieces of your heart finally crashing down from its station inside your ribcage. Whatever it is, you opt to joke a bit in an attempt to salvage what’s left of your dignity. “I know, but I’d appreciate it if you stop treating me like some kind of a virgin who hasn’t been touched before. You’re not the first guy to kiss me out of the blue quite frankly.”

He doesn’t look amused by it. “____…”

“It’s fine,” you repeat for the third time that night, even if it really isn’t. “Like I said, you weren’t thinking straight. Don’t make an issue out of nothing.”

“This isn’t nothing. You should be mad at me.”

“I’m not.”

“You should.”

“I don’t know. Perhaps. Maybe.”

“And you look like you’re not.”

“Yeah, maybe not.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know.” You shrug. Perhaps I’ve always wanted to experience what it was like to kiss you, that’s why. “I mean, it’s partially my fault too. I didn’t stop you. I’m a little drunk myself.” You half heartedly chuckle.

Mingyu stares at you, and you know he’s doing it because he’s trying to read your mind. He doesn’t know how to be subtle whenever he attempts to decipher whatever goes around in your head, since most of the time, you’re able to conceal what you feel excellently to the point you don’t even have to try too hard as well. You just have to keep a straight or casual face, and then that’s it—totally unnoticeable.

“I’m sorry,” he only apologizes again and you close my eyes, smiling as you sigh.

“Stop apologizing. Please. You’re going to make me feel bad.”

“You can’t just—”

“Let’s just forget about it.” You cut him off. “Just treat this as a nightmare or whatever. I don’t care. I just need you to stop saying sorry, Mingyu.”

He takes a deep breath, and finally nods, stepping farther away from you that gives you the space you didn’t know you needed in order to feel calmer.

“Anyways,” you start again, “I think it’s best that I go.”

He meets your eyes. “I… I think you’re right.”

“Good. At least we’re on the same page with that one.”

You’re certain that you’re forgetting a few of your belongings (a jacket and an umbrella) in Mingyu’s unit that you don’t bother finding. You just snatch your bag from the couch and stand there in the living room for a few seconds before looking back at Mingyu who never followed you there and instead stayed in the kitchen, just staring at you as you got your things.

You don’t know what to say to properly express your farewell, so you just ask him a question you already know the answer to. “You’re going to Jeonghan’s birthday celebration, right?”

He decides to walk towards you this time, but only to head to the door so he can open it for you. “Yeah.”

“Okay. Guess I’ll see you then.”

You don’t wait for him to reply. You just march straight to the hall outside, not turning back and letting the heavy feeling in your chest escape in the form of rapid tears and a muffled sound.

thank you for reading ! feedback is always appreciated ☻

⌗ ⸰ ₊⠀ all rights reserved. no part of my work is to be reposted / translated / used in any kind of platform without my permission. i only use this account to post fics.

[thelooniemoonie]

So I just finished reading House of Leaves...

Here are my thoughts. I will do my best to avoid spoilers, but will mention a thing or two.

Oh man, that was one hell of a ride. While I myself am a huge fan of horror, this was the first horror book I have read, and what a great experience it was!

Going into the book I already somewhat knew of the madness that lurks inside (that being the quarter inch, and the impossibly long hallway) and was surprised that the madness started on very early. Being the book is over 700 pages long, I sure as hell didn't expect it to start about 60 pages in.

What you don't expect however, is the madness that takes it's toll the longer the book goes on. Multiple storylines, narrators and themes start converging together to the point where everything starts falling into place, to the point it becomes nauseating as exploring the house itself. What I can say however, is that the house is only barely scratching the surface of what is truly going on within these pages.

For context the book is cleverly written as a meta-narrative, as an essay analyzing the film The Navidson Record, a fictional film that does not exist in the real world. What the book strangely does however, is reference actual real life sources when dissecting its premise, to the point where reality and fiction start blurring. The book feels as if it's having a conversation with itself, covering countless of different themes and metaphors that overlap with one another. Given this thing has been analyzed and picked apart for decades since its release, I'm gonna leave it to the experts about the secrets within its pages. (Although I will say this: pay attention. The longer the book goes on the more the different puzzle pieces will start clicking together.)

I was curious as to how a book may scare a reader since I'm unfamiliar with the experience of reading horror, but I will say the longer the book went on the worse it got. If I had to make a comparison, it would be the same feeling I experienced when watching Skinamarink: Dread. A long, droning kind of dread that one experiences when you are alone in your house and all the lights are off and everything is black. And you know no one is coming for you. But you swear you saw something from the corner of your eye. It's the feeling of running up the stairs after turning the lights off and praying something isn't running after you. Dread.

Very quickly things will become nauseating. At first I wasn't scared of the premise of the house: it's a haunted house that defies reality. So? But I found myself not dreading the events that unfolded or the "interesting" formatting of the book, but that the reality of the book itself seemed to be imploding on itself. Spoilers, but the one moment I think where I specifically started spiralling was when Exploration #5 was occurring, and Navidson had to stop and rest with only his matches, he pulls out a book to read and it's....the House of Leaves? The book you're reading right now? But how is that possible? How is Navidson reading the real life book that you're reading, when the fictional events that are pertaining to him are happening right now to him?? What are even the Johnny segments?? (Note: don't read them at work like I did) Why does nobody cited in this book know who the Navidsons are, even though they're quoted directly in reviewing the film?? What the hell is going on???

.

I made a joke in an earlier post that Navidson wants to fuck the house. I meant this as a joke. What I soon horrifically realized was that others were correcting me in that it wasn't a joke. Navidson wants to fuck the house. But he also doesn't want to fuck the house. But it is also a secret third thing that's literal to the foundation of this story. (No pun intended.) But oh god it gets so much worse.

At the time of writing this, I just finished the book 1 hour ago. I feel like I just stepped off the worst rollercoaster. And I loved it.

10/10 very spooks

On a less serious note I think the funniest moment in the book was when the Chad's and Daisy's teacher, after noticing their strange behaviour at school due to the effects of the house, reasonably decides to pay their parents a visit to talk about it. What the poor lady doesn't expect however, is that she arrives right after the events of the house unfold and the Navidsons are having the worst week of their life, coming to the screaming and crying family while there is a dead body on the floor.

In essence it can be summed up by this gif, which frankly sums up the vibe of the story overall:

So yeah it's a good book. I recommend it.

[absolutesort]

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨   ;    ʙᴇᴀᴄʜ ʜᴜᴛ ᴘʀᴏᴍᴘᴛ !

how was the challenge ? what was the most memorable moment from it for you ?

      “ the challenge was... ”  frankie hesitates, looking for the right word.  “ fun. ”  she’s nodding enthusiastically, but there’s a sheepish smile on her face. embarrassment’s a rare colour on her.  “ way more eventful than i thought it would be. obviously, there was the shit with miles. i had to mount him and kiss him, and we just met that day so... ”  she grits her teeth, even though she didn’t have to kiss him — at least not like that — could’ve played it safe and kissed him anywhere else, or even picked an inoffensive but feasible option like marcus, but frankie’s never been the kind of girl to choose the easy option.  “ guess that’s one way of taking the awkwardness out of the getting to know you thing. i think he liked it. ”  her finger and thumb pinch together, leaving just a margin of space between them.  “ tiny bit. ”

is there anyone you have chemistry with or see yourself wanting to get to know better ?

    “ honestly ? i have chemistry with most of them. literally so hard being sexy and wanted by everyone. but yeah, i think it’s pretty apparent that there’s chemistry, biology, some crap with miles. i’m not sure what, but... yeah, it’s a problem. ”  she makes friends at lightspeed, but hasn’t really hit it off with someone in that way besides callie, where that initial pull had been pretty instant too.  “ i can be completely myself with him, like i’ve known him my whole life. no topic is off limits like we can just chat shit for hours, dude. it’s a vibe, and if it ends up just a friends thing, i won’t be mad. he’s so sound, i wanna talk to him all the time. ”  she pauses, for a moment, considering if there’s anyone else.  “ maybe i’m reading it wrong, but there’s some kinda weird not quite flirty but kinda flirty energy with adela, especially after that three-way-kiss. she’s brought up eating out almost every time we’ve spoken, and it definitely has an edge to it. i don’t know, i can’t read her. mali and i had a bit of a vibe. she definitely hit on me, and she’s hot, but she seems too put together for me, i like them a bit more rugged. val’s cool too, there was definitely a bit of a click there. she pulled a naomi and licked my neck or some crap, but now her and marcus seem to have a good thing going, and dude needs it more than me. ”

do you see your fellow islanders hitting it off with anyone ?

   “ val and marcus, for sure. they’re cute as heck. like, he deserves to be happy and fucking someone, and i’m glad it’s someone as cool as val. definitely wouldn’t mind being their third. phoebe seems like she’s into dylan, and i feel like he could try that if he opened himself up a bit more. how’s he meant to know if it’s as good as, better than, or not as good as his connection with naomi if he doesn’t at least try. apparently something happened with josh and mali ??  which is fucking insane, but hot. i love those crazy freaks. um... other than that... ?  i don’t know. i’m pretty blind when it comes to noticing who other people are focusing on unless they straight up tell me or it happens in front of me. like, i had no idea max liked jenny until i walked in on them boning. fucking rude awakening that was. ”

did you share a bed with anyone ? how did that go ? do you think you’ll share with them again ?

    these questions feel so pointed, but she guesses that’s the point.  “ yeah, i did. and i’ve decided i’m not gonna feel bad about it. i’m here to have fun, nobody’s in a relationship. ” and she doesn’t really owe anyone anything so fuck it. plus sharing a bed can totally be platonic, even if it hadn’t exactly felt that way.  “ i shared with miles. his body temperature is so fucking hot though, i mean warm, not hot hot, it was like... that bit in eclipse when bella’s in the tent and she’s freezing her tits off because her lame boyfriend is a fucking hundred year old corpse and then sexy jacob snuggles her and he’s just like, this warm cosy thing, like a space heater in human form. felt like i was gonna have to throw the duvet off to stop myself from overheating. i don’t know if we’ll share again. i kind of want to. ”  is that bad ?   “ but i’m also trying to like... be mindful and respectful of the callie situation and not do something cunty even though i kinda want to. ”  and yeah, maybe there’s a bit of playing hard to get in there, too.  sue her.  “ it’s super hard. like the producers know what they’re doing. it’s tough. ”

what do you think is going on at the other villa ?

   “ haven’t really thought about it. ”  it’s only half-true. she thinks about callie constantly, except when she’s with miles or marcus or someone who makes her feel so present that literally all of her thoughts just disappear.  “ i feel like all of them will be into callie. and i don’t know what she’ll do. like, we had that fight about exclusivity or whatever and agreed that we can both get to know other people as well, so i guess it would be pretty fucking snakey of me to want to get to know people but not want her to do that. but it does suck that i have no idea what’s happening. i would be fine with her talking to people if i could see it in action, and knew they had dead chat, but the not knowing is brutal. what are they like ? are they more her type ? does she have a better connection with any of them ? would their lives on the outside be a better fit ? are they hotter than me ?  nah, they’re probably not hotter than me. and they’re definitely not funnier than me. ” she’s gotta count the small victories, otherwise what’s the point ?

[harrypotterbrainworms]

Painful Living

Summary: Remus hurts you accidentally as a werewolf as you’re trying your best to hide it. 

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Male Reader

Key: (Y/N)- your name

Word Count: 2718

Your face burned a little as you managed to get out before anyone else got hurt, and now you were limping back to your dorm. Now in the light you could see that it was worse than you initially thought. A fair scratch across your face with some added bruises and scrapes on your legs, better and worse than you had thought.

Things happened so fast, faster than you would’ve liked. This was a rare occurrence which the marauders barely prepared for. The evening outside still raged on as you cleaned yourself off. Nothing felt off or wrong at this moment, so you thought it’d be better to see Madam Pomfrey when it was actually daytime. You winced as you dabbed the alcohol on the wound. This was gonna leave a nasty scar. You collapsed into bed, your dreams felt hot and out of order. Your eyes burned as you opened them to find that as it usually does… time passed and now you were being awoken by an awful talking sound.

“Wah-What?” You managed to say before passing out again, the smell and taste of metallic blood filling your senses as you fell face deep into the pillow. Dreaming of nothing and kind of everything. Hearing the sounds around you and the frantic people making weird sounds you assumed were probably words, but everything was so muffled.

“(Y/N)? Are you okay?” You could hear the fuzzy idea of words coming from a cocky looking mouth. Sirius.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just fine” You slurred out as you waved him away, you just felt a little sick, he should stop worrying. You shivered and pulled the duvet around you. It was cold last night and you think you had bled all over your pillow which was true as you looked back to see the red stain.

“Dammit.” You cursed as you got up, your head spinning before it settled and you could focus your eyes on Sirius.

“What happened last night?!” He scolded you, taking your face aggressively as he inspected the wound. It didn’t sting that much anymore, so you assumed it must’ve properly closed up now. He whispered a few curses to himself and let go of your face. “You just left?!” He pointed vaguely to the air, turning back to you with a hand on his hip.

“Did I?” You mumbled, rubbing your temples trying to remember the exact events of the night. Sirius clicked his fingers in front of you. “Earth to (Y/N), we need to get you to the hospital wing. Remus just got out” Sirius held his hand out towards you.

“Did you say anything?” You said as Sirius helped you out of bed. Your memory became less fuzzy as you walked towards the wing. “Remus. Oh god… Remus” He winced slightly.

“Remus what? Oh.” He looked at the door of the hospital wing, pausing to see if you wanted to go in alone. You nodded and he let you go, waving him off as he headed to breakfast.

Getting patched up, Madam Pomfrey didn’t chat or even scold you. Just working silently with pursed lips as you winced away from her every now and then. She checked you for any sign of infection before dabbing a potion of some kind that made it feel like your body closed in on itself, making you feel dizzy.

Just as quickly as you got in, you left, Lily waiting outside of the doors to escot you back and make sure you were okay.

“I’m fine.” You rolled your eyes, your feet dangling off the edge of the bathroom counter as she applied makeup to the newly formed scar across your face. “See? I’m dandy. Pomfrey patched me up and now no one needs to worry” You tried to give a reassuring smile, but Lily just shook her head.

“You need to tell him (Y/N).” Lily frowned, a hand on her hip as you watched her work her muggle magic on your face. You frowned back. No one needs to worry about you, you were fine. Why couldn’t anyone believe you? “Here. Bring it back after school… Tell him… for your’s and his sake.” She put a hand on your shoulder and you shrugged it off, getting up. “Fine.”

It was hard not to bump into someone as goddamn tall as Remus, but somehow you managed just long enough to make sure he didn’t see you as you slipped out to reapply. James gave you sad side glances from his desk until he managed to corner you. He got up, walking over to your desk, a furrow in his brow.

“Sirius told me.” Similar to Lily, he had placed a strategic hand on his hip, pouting slightly. “Of course he did.” You frowned, giving Sirius a side eye from your vantage point. “No, no. No ‘of course he did.’ It’s not fair to him” He pointed at Remus who was sitting away from the other Marauders similar to he was, looking very deep in thought. Your heart dropping a little bit.                

“Tell him.” His nostrils flared as he looked at you, you looked away, guilty.  “I can’t.” You whispered away from him, so he could barely hear you. He shook his head disappointedly.

“Fine. I warned you.” As he walked away, you subconsciously touched your face looking over at Remus as you sighed. It’s harder than James thinks, you thought to yourself. An audible sigh leaving you, you didn’t want to lie to your boyfriend, you really didn’t.

Sitting in the darkest corner of the library you can avoid the other, you hear footsteps approaching you. You froze before looking up to see Sirius. “I don’t want to hear it from you too, Pads.” You sighed, sinking further into your seat.

“You can’t tell him, (Y/N).” He sat down next to you, grabbing a book to hide his face as you both talked. “What?” You whispered.

“We both know he’s stubborn. He’ll dig himself into hole.” He whisper shouted back at you, his eyes peering from the top of the book. His eyebrows falling and rising as he talked, ending in a furrow and side glance towards James and Remus on the other side of the library.

“I don’t know.” You replied, sighing heavily as your brain tried to decipher your feelings. Tell Remus, Don’t tell Remus. it was a 2 for 2 vote, you sighed again. This was stupid. You touched your face again, thinking about what Remus would want. Probably to tell him. “Just keep it in mind.” Sirius ended on another frown, today sure was the day for frowning, you thought. He put the book down, giving you a nod as he disappeared behind a bookshelf.

It had been a full two days avoiding Remus like the plague, until he finally cornered you in a hallway on your way to class. Two arms trapping you to the wall, you could feel his breath against you.

“I’m not an idiot.” He asked in a calm anger, a scary trait he had. His eyes burning with determination as you wondered if you could just fall through the wall to avoid him. “I don’t know what you mean.” You lied.

“If you’re scared of me… Just say it.” His eyes pleaded for an answer from you as you struggled to further the lie. With his statement, he back away from you, seeing the metaphorical sweat on your brow.

“That’s- that’s not it” You fumbled, wringing your hands together as your heart pounded into your ears. “Then what?” He barked.

“I don’t- I can’t… I don’t know how to tell you-“ You smudge off makeup to reveal the scar. His face fell as you looked down. He wanted to reach out and trace your scar, but his eyes were filled with betrayal and sadness. You stayed quiet.

“I hurt you, didn’t I?” He demanded softy as you prayed to be sucked into the wall again. His eyes were filled with a kind of hurt you hadn’t seen before. A wave of guilt keeps you somehow quieter than silence itself.

“Just tell me!” He pushed further, stepping back as if your silence struck him a blow.

“I didn’t mean to lie, okay?-“ You tried to start, but he wasn’t having any of it.“What.” He deadpanned, his worst fears coming true as he watched you fumble your wording.

“It got out of hand and then no time was the right time and now-“ You tried even harder to explain yourself, but you had already dug yourself into a hole as you watched Remus’s eyes look for any reassurance that he was wrong.

“All of you lied to me?!” You gulped as his voice was raised, his voice straining as he tried to hold back tears. “To protect you!” You defended yourself as best you could.

“No.” He just said, his hands wanting to reach out even more, but he held them in front of his chest.

`I thought you’d be mad and then we’d break up and never speak again and-“ You wrung your hands together more frantically as he stepped away more.

“You thought right. I am mad.” He sighed sadly, not giving you the satisfaction of a last look as he walked away. A few tears finally escaped your eyes as you watched him.

You paced up and down the common room as Sirius, James and Peter did their own thing, your relentless thinking seemingly escaped your own head as James spoke up.

“I told you.” He hummed sadly as he waxed his broom. “I know.” You sighed. “So many times.” He looked up at you, a motherly shake and sigh as he rubbed circles around the helt. “I know.” You groaned, frustrated with your own decisions.

“For the record I said he’d be hurt.” Sirius wedged in his own opinion, you and James shooting him an angry look. He held up in arms in surrender, shutting his mouth before someone could tell him.

You groaned loudly, throwing your arms up in the air. “I’m going to sleep.’ You announced and your audience shrugged as you stormed off.

Tired and sad, you crawled into the sad excuse you called a bed, a light brown blood stain still on your pillow as you climbed in. You needed to tell Remus something, anything, that reflected your guilt, but you thought it best be a job for tomorrow if you could ever fall asleep.

You caught Remus in the courtyard, the sunset sky looking over it. He was alone, thank merlin, as he read to himself. You took a deep breath and tapped his shoulder. “What.” He stated, still mad. The statement not really in question and more ‘Please leave me alone.’ You sighed and tried to make the words come out, but as he stood up towering over you, you had to clear the lump in your throat before you spoke.

“Let me explain myself and you can hate me in peace, I promise.” You looked up at him with pleading eyes, he chuckled bitterly. “Please, Moony…” You pleaded further trying to catch his gaze.

“I don’t hate you, (Y/N)… How could I? It’s just that I don’t want to hurt you again. Look at you” He pushed your face up with his hand, tracing the scar across your face. “I couldn’t handle that. We made a promise and then you just lied to me.” You looked down, ashamed of his soft eyes piercing your soul. “Your word means nothing if I can’t trust you or myself.” You sat down on the stone ledge in the courtyard.

Remus frowned down at you, his lips pursed slightly as you tried to speak. He bent down to sit next to you.You were trying so hard to get the words out in a way that made sense. He sighed and looked away from you and up into the lilac sky. “Everyone promised no one would get hurt.” He looked back at you, laying a hand on yours. “I can’t handle hurting you again.” You keep your eyes locked away from him. You could hear him sigh again, taking the hand away. “I can’t handle you hurting me again…” He struggled to get the last words out, his throat catching the last syllable.

“This is why I couldn’t tell you. I can rest and be fine. You do it every month, I think I can handle getting a scratch.” You felt yourself growing more frustrated with him. Treating you like you couldn't handle a bit of roughhousing. Though every time he looked at your scar your heart hurt. You put a hand on his shoulder softly, trying to keep the same energy as him.

“It’s not fine. It’s different for me. I deserve this.” He shrugged it off, staying as stubborn as ever.

“You, Remus Lupin, don’t deserve this.” Your frustration was very clear through your tone now, pausing before every word.

“You can’t possibly understand what I go through.” He turned away from you now, eyes truly locked on the sky, refusing to look at you.

“I know that, but I’m trying to, okay?” You huffed out, crossing your arms as you watched his eyes dart from cloud to cloud. Choosing to focus on everything, but you. Your chest growing heavier with guilt and anger.

“Maybe you should stop then. You don’t need to.” He said as he stole a side glance as your frown, looking a little proud at his affect on you. “But I want to, Remus.” You sighed, crawling into yourself as you laid your arms and head on your legs.

“Then maybe we should break up.” The words landed into your brain with a crash, the feeling of the moon being pulled from the sky. Leaving you to feel the darkness that was washing over the sky as the sunset. “W-What?” You managed to choke out.

“Maybe we just shouldn’t be together, We can’t keep hurting each other.” He stared off into space, failing to notice the stream of the tears that started to fall down your face as the words felt like they were slowly choking you. “How can we date if you can’t be honest with me?” The sounds from your sobs were getting more difficult to keep to yourself. Your shoulders shuddered with the exhausted sobs leaving your body, Remus’s ‘peace’ being disturbed by this, he looked back at you.

“I’m s-sorry, I really… I really didn’t want to lie. Please don’t hate me, Remus. Please. I thought it would be okay, that you could be okay. I didn’t want to hurt you” The violent sobs took a course through your throat, the words harder than you thought they’d be. He frowned, this isn’t how he hoped it would go. Against all his better judgement he grabbed you, holding you close as you sobbed.

“It’s okay.” He hummed softly as he held your shaking frame, you sobbed harder into his chest. “It’s not. I lied t-to you. You deserved to know” You spoke muffled by his sweater. “I don’t want to lose you.” “You won’t lose me, love.” He squeezed your body a little tighter, your arms weakly snaking around him too.

“I shouldn’t have lied, it wasn’t fair to you.” You hiccuped as you pulled away from his grasp, looking up at him with the softest look you could. The guilt eating away at you as you watched him look back just as lovingly.

“It wasn’t” He sighed, taking your hands into his while you desperately tried to control your crying.

“I just… You can’t protect me all the time, even from yourself” His heart broke looking at the tears streaming down your face, his eyes softened as he held your hands pulling them to his lips to kiss softly. “I shouldn’t have said that to you.” He whispered into them which felt like it made you sob harder. He was so kind to you.

“I really am sorry, Remus.” You said as you held onto his soft hands, feeling his lips plant another kiss softly onto them.

“I know.” He said softly as you brought you into another hug, wrapping his arms warmly around you. It made you feel safe. It made him feel better.

[absolutelyfizzing]

He can't hurt you anymore

Bucky x reader

Description - Reader is the barista that Bucky has befriended at his local coffee shop but he thinks you may be hiding something. Your boyfriend might not be as kind as he tries to come off as. One day Bucky investigates and intervenes. Takes place around TFATWS but the shield isn't a factor. After the events of Endgame. Its pretty platonic Buck x Reader but it's sort of implied that future romance is probably a thing.

Warnings - TW DOMESTIC ABUSE!!! This is a big part of the story, if this is triggering for you, DO NOT READ THIS!! If you are in a situation where you need help getting out of an abusing household please get help. also endgame spoilers! Theres some cussing as well and female pronouns are used.

Word count - 4700 ish?

A/N - I am writing this from how an abusive relationship was for ME, how I acted, and the ways that I felt. This is in no way a generalization of how these situations are for most people nor is it a romanticization of abuse. Please reach out to someone or even me if you need help or you want to talk about anything. Do not read this story if you will be harmed by reading this, PLEASE.

MASTERLIST

Bucky's favorite part of his day was when he went to get coffee from the small shop down the street from his apartment. He didn't have many places he liked to go outside of the small room that he often felt trapped him but he knew that it was good for him to get out and interact with people. His therapist had told him as much.

He really didn't even like the coffee that much, he found that it made him jittery, but he went just to say hi to you. He always got the same order and usually got there around the same time so sometimes you would even have his coffee ready just as he was walking in. When you did things like that it made his heart flutter. He liked you in a romantic way but you only ever lightly flirted. Not wanting to scare you away, he never pressed and he kept his conversation moderately friendly. He had noticed that sometimes you seemed off. More so than he would say might be caused by a bad day.

On these days your eyes would be flying around the room and your hands shaky. You normally had bags under your eyes and you might even have bruises around your body. He also noticed that on those days you would cover up more but he could catch a glimpse of a purple bruise on your arm under your sleeve when you moved.

As he walked into the shop, he saw that today would be one of those days. He had been going to the coffee shop that you were at for probably 6 months and he had never seen you this shaken up. You seemed to be fully zoned out as you automatically did the cleaning in front of you. He had to clear his throat a bit to get you to notice him and when he did he regretted it. You flinched and your shoulders tensed before looking over to him. You relaxed a bit and a wide smile appeared on your face. He could vaguely tell it seemed to be fake but it was one of the best fake smiles he had ever seen. He almost commented on it before he noticed the bruises on your neck and arm.

"You okay?" He questioned, eyebrow quirked and his tone lightly teasing. He guessed they might be from whoever you were sleeping with having been a bit rough, something that he wouldn't have judged you for anyway. When you tensed up a bit and drew your hand to your neck he saw the look of slight fear cross your eyes.

"Oh I'm fine!" You recovered, "Didn't have time to cover them up this morning." You smiled and put your arm back down. It looked like you were going with his guess that they were from your boyfriend but in a non threatening way. His smile lessened a bit and he got out his wallet.

"Well, you know the drill. Medium americano with cream and sugar please." He sighed and he put some money in your tip jar while winking at you. You blushed and nodded before turning around to get started on his order.

While you were turned around he heard the bell on the door ring signaling that someone had entered. He turned to see who it was only to be met with an unfamiliar face. This was a bit of a rare occurrence considering he came here so often and he knew almost all of the other people who walked in. This man was large and domineering. He didn't look abnormal in any way, just that his eyes didn't hold the kindness that Bucky searched for when meeting someone new. The man pushed past Bucky to stand at the counter and knocked on it loudly, trying to get your attention. When you turned, you looked like you saw a ghost.

James studied you carefully as the color slowly came back to your face and the large smile that didn't quite seem right was plastered on your face again.

"Hey, babe! Can I get you something?" you asked him kindly and James realized that this must be your boyfriend. He noticed the slight waver that was in your voice as you spoke to to man and the way that your hands began to shake a bit.

"No thanks, I just wanted to check on you to see how you were doing and to apologize again. I was just heading in to work." Your boyfriend smiled and you flinched for a moment before taking a deep breath, bracing yourself.

"No worries, I already told you I forgave you." You grinned, this one looking more like it reached your eyes. "Have a good day at work!" You chirped at him. His hand came to your cheek and James saw you flinch before the man leaned in to kiss you. As soon as he pulled away and left, you turned back to the drink you were making for Buck and your hands were unsteady.

"Are you alright, Y/N?" He tentatively asked. He didn't want to push but he had a bad feeling stuck in his stomach.

You turned to him, ready drink in hand, "I'm doing great, thank you for asking, James" You smiled and Bucky nearly swooned when you used his name. He adjusted his glove a bit and fidgeted with the sleeve on his metal arm, a habit he had when he was anxious.

"Do you mind if I drink it up here? I'd love to chat a bit." He did this pretty often. There was a seat next to the counter for employees that he would occupy on days where the shop wasn't too busy. You gazed at him and nodded enthusiastically.

"How are you now that you're all settled into the new place?" You asked gently and he smiled. He appreciated that you remembered details about him. It made him feel less crazy for having known so much about you.

"It's good! The bed still doesn't feel right and there are still boxes lying around but I cant seem to get myself to unpack all the way. If I didn't have this part of my day then I think I'd be bored out of my mind" He said. You blushed a bit and smiled. You always liked hearing about how he was doing, you worried about him. He had told you at some point that he was a veteran and that he had some issues adapting to his new life. You didn't bring it up often so as to not scare him off but you liked to check in when you could.

"You might want to start looking for something else to occupy your time then, I don't know how much longer I'm going to be here." You mumbled. You were still smiling a bit but your gaze had saddened.

"What do you mean? Are you leaving the city? Heading back home?" he questioned quickly. You had told him that you weren't originally from New York. You chuckled a bit at his panic.

"No, but might be moving in with my boyfriend, that guy who came in earlier." You explained but he still had a confused look on his face.

"Why does that mean you wont be working here?"

"Oh I don't know, he is trying to get me to quit while I'm figuring out life and stuff. Thinks I might be more helpful around the house and he has enough to support us both." you tried to explain but you knew the logic in your statement was flawed. The reality was that your boyfriend wanted you to be financially dependent on him but you were ignoring that as the bruises around your throat reminded you what happened to girlfriends who talked back. You looked into Bucky's eyes to find him staring sadly.

"You should be able to keep working if you want to."  He sounded urgent and you laughed it off.

"You're just mad cause you won have an excuse to see your favorite barista anymore." As you turned back to the cleaning around the shop to do. It was a quiet morning so the silence was slightly deafening. You both didn't speak for a couple minutes before James broke the silence.

"Are you okay, Y/N?" he asked very lightly. Like he didn't want to scare you off. "I'm guessing your boyfriend left those marks and earlier when he came in-"

"It was an accident" You stated quickly. Urgently. Pleadingly. You still weren't looking at him but you had stopped cleaning. "He didn't mean to, he felt bad about it." You continued before turning to James. There were tears in your eyes and you tried to smile reassuringly.

"Those kinds of accidents shouldn't happen, Y/N" He muttered, trying not to make you feel attacked at all but also wanting to let you know that he knew something was wrong.

"It was my fault." You began.

"There is no way-"

"No it was. I messed something up and-and it was on me. James, you don't need to worry about me." Your voice was shaking a bit. "Please, don't worry about me." you were pleading. Your eyes were begging.

You both stood in silence for a moment before you began moving around. You didn't really have a task to be doing but you couldn't be still. You just couldn't be still.

"I am worried" he whispered and you felt the tears in your eyes threaten to fall. You knew you situation wasn't good but you didn't feel like there was anything you could do. And you were partially still convinced that your boyfriend didn't mean it, even though past experiences had already proved you wrong. You knew that after the 5th time, it wasn't accidental. But fear and guilt held you back. You were not an aggressive person. When he yelled at you he made you feel weak. You crumbled. You would never be able to escape.

You went through the rest of your shift in moderate silence. You worked when customers came in and when they left you would try to make yourself seem busy around the shop. James sat patiently, you knew he was gong to want to walk you back to your boyfriend's apartment. Your stomach clenched as you prayed that your boyfriend wouldn't be home.

After your shift you agreed to let James walk you home, you only lived a few blocks away. You didn't talk much and you felt guilty for creating that atmosphere. When you reached your building you stopped and turned to him.

"Thank you for walking me home." You smiled. "I'll see you tomorrow?" You asked and Bucky nodded.

When you turned to head into you building, he didn't leave. He waited. He knew something was wrong but he didn't want to create a mess for you if he didn't need to. He stood against the building before walking in behind someone who was entering. He made his way to the address he had caught on your key earlier and stopped about 3 floors down from yours. He wouldn't intervene unless you needed him and he could listen in from further away. One of the few times he was thankful for the super serum.

"Where have you been?" a growl sounded.

"I was just-"

"Your shift ended 30 minutes ago. Were you talking to that leather wearing asshole? Huh?" There was a yell. "Were you cheating on me, you bitch?!"

"No, babe, Bucky just walked me home, he was just being nice. The person taking over my shift was just a little-"

"He walked you home?" He screamed, "You're just whoring yourself out to anyone now, huh?"

At this point Bucky had heard enough but he noticed that the stairs were closed and the elevator was taking forever. He was hitting himself for not going up to your floor to be more prepared. His heart was pounding and he could feel his eyes watering.

"Babe, I'm sorry, he didn't mean anything by it, I promise-"

He heard a yelp and something making impact and he decided he was done waiting. He didn't know why the stairs were closed but it didn't matter. He broke the door to the stairwell open and he sprinted up them as fast as possible. It was easier to hear your whimpers as he got closer and he could still hear hitting.

When he made it to the door he didn't hesitate to break it in. When he entered the apartment he felt eyes on him. In the corner of your living room you were hunched in a corner, breathing heavily with tears streaming down your face and a fresh broken lip, your boyfriend leering over you with his fist clenched.

"Get the fuck away from her." Bucky felt himself growl. He didn't want to hurt this guy in front of you, knowing that would traumatize you more, but it was taking everything in him not to snap his neck right then.

"What the fuck are you gonna do?" Your boyfriend sneered, "You have no right to come in here and tell be how I'm supposed to deal with my girlfriend. Get the fuck out!" Your boyfriend had moved away from you and you took a bit of a breath. Bucky noticed the shaking of your body as you breathed and he saw red.

Before he really considered what he was doing Bucky was already moving toward the man in the middle of the room, his metal hand clenched. He moved to grab your boyfriend's arm and when he tried to block, going into the fight cocky, Bucky decided he would put him in his place. With what seemed to be minimal effort, Bucky turned the mans arm around and jammed his knee into his back. Once your boyfriend was on the floor, in less than 10 seconds, Bucky had his knee on his chest and his metal arm on his neck.

"You will never lay another finger on her again, you understand me? You're gonna go to fucking prison and you'll never be able to get near her again." Bucky growled at the man who was struggling futilely beneath him. He pressed on his neck harder and waited for his body to give out, holding long enough that he would be knocked out for at least a few minutes so he could get you out of there.

Bucky looked up at you and you were still shaking in the corner, seemingly still terrified. You looked so different from the girl he had come to know. Bucky realized that he might have just made you more scared of him but he knew it was worth it to get you out of the situation. You gulped and took a deep shaky breath before moving to stand up. Bucky moved to stand also to go over and help you but you immediately say back down.

"Hey, doll. I'm not gonna hurt you-" Bucky started but you cut him off.

"I know, I know I just..." You took another shallow breath and looked at the man Bucky was no longer holding down. He could get free and move toward you now if he were to wake up. Bucky understood your gaze sighed a bit, looking around the apartment he now realized probably belonged to your boyfriend. He then noticed the belt on your boyfriend and moved to take it off so he could tie him up with it. He heard you whimper and he made a guess as to why, his heart clenching once again. He quickly bound the large man's hands and attached him to a support beam in the middle of the room. He checked the bindings using larger movements than he needed to so that you would see they were tight from your spot across the room. Bucky then stood and slowly made his way near you. Instead of trying to get very close, he opted to sit against the wall about halfway between you and the man tied up in the room, trying to make sure that you didn't feel threatened by him and that you knew your boyfriend was no longer a threat.

"I'm gonna call a friend okay? You're okay now." Buck said gently to you and you nodded. Your eyes were watery as tears began to fall and you scooted a little closer to Bucky, still not sitting close enough to touch. Bucky made no move to push you.  He instead just dialed the only person he could think of.

"Hey, Sam... You in town?.. I know but I need some help. I need the police here and if you could drive too that would be great. I got someone here I don't want going in a cop car... I know that's a lot to ask but I wouldn't be asking if it weren't serious... Please?.. That would be great if she's there." It seemed that the 'please' made the person on the other line agree. Bucky hung up and looked toward you. "Someone's on the way, okay? Do you need anything right now or need any medical help thats urgent?"He tried to be gentle but he couldn't hide the fear in his voice. If there was severe damage somewhere he needed to know now.

"N-no, it wasn't that bad. It's just my face and my ribs I guess but I've healed from worse." You mumbled, trying to be reassuring but then realizing that you may have made him feel worse. "I'm sorry" You mumbled as the tears began again.

"Whoa, what on earth are you sorry for?" Bucky asked as he felt his own eyes begin to water.

"Its just that-" you took a breath for a moment and tried to calm your shaking, "this isn't your job and I'm sorry that you have to deal with it and that I couldn't do it on my own." You cried a bit, Bucky barely being able to make out your words with how quietly you were speaking. He wasn't entirely sure how to help. He experimentally slid a hand along the floor toward you going very slowly so you could move or tell him to stop if you wanted. Instead you moved your hand and reached out so your fingers were touching on the floor. You still didn't move closer to him but the nonthreatening contact made you feel a bit better. He spoke up quietly.

"Y/N, I know this has been a really hard day for you and probably been rough for however long you've been with that asshole but you need to understand that this is not your fault. You did not make him do this to you and you did not deserve it. You will never be in a room alone with him again, okay?" He made decisive eye contact with you and you nodded a bit. "I am going to make sure that nothing happens to you now, I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you again." He sounded reassuring and you scooted just close enough that his hand was holding yours. He smiled lightly at you and you jumped as you heard a knock at the doorframe of the entrance where the door had been practically broken off its hinges.

You tensed up immediately and Bucky stood a bit protectively in front of you, letting go of your hand in the process. You saw a tall kind looking man at the doorway, his frame slightly hunched to make sure that he didn't startle you too much. You looked at him a bit fearfully and took a deep breath before glancing at Bucky and then smiling lightly at the man in the doorway. He watched you carefully as he stepped into the apartment.

"Hey there, my name is Sam, I'm just gonna get him out of here. There's a police car with his name on it downstairs. I brought someone with me who's going to help get you out of here to somewhere safe, okay?" He smiled at you as he moved toward the man tied up in the center of the room. As the bindings came off you skittered back toward the corner a bit and only eased once he was dragged out of the room. From the doorway came a redhead with bags under her eyes. She looked like she hadn't gotten good sleep in a while and you felt like you recognized her from somewhere.

"I'm Pepper, is it okay if I come in?" She looked nice and she had a motherly presence. You nodded and smiled a bit. Her gaze softened further and she walked slowly toward you and as she walked past Bucky she touched his arm lightly, conveying something that you didn't quite understand. "Can I help you up?" she asked as she stood in front of you, her hand reached out. You nodded and put your hand in hers, allowing her to pull you up. You felt the damage that had been done more clearly when you stood up, there was definitely something wrong with your ribs and your stomach. She carefully and slowly put an arm around your shoulders as she herded you out of the apartment. you looked back to where Bucky was standing and he smiled at you reassuringly but his eyes seemed sad. You let yourself be led to a car outside with a man that Pepper called "Happy" driving. She sat in the back with you and made casual one sided conversation to put you at ease.

Back at your apartment Bucky began to try to pack you a bag. He knew that Pepper would take good care of you and wouldn't let anything happen. He would meet you at the Avengers tower later, assuming you would be staying there until you felt comfortable living by yourself at your own apartment again. He moved through your ex's apartment with a critical gaze, noting holes in the wall and a gun in the corner. He presumed it was to protect against home intruders but he didn't doubt that it had been used to threaten you too. He found the bedroom and got to work getting some things that he thought you might want like a hoodie that looked like yours and some personal belongings that were clearly your possessions. He was trying very hard not to accidentally grab something that was your ex's and once he had a full bag he headed out. He saw Sam leaned against the wall outside your building and Bucky immediately got worried.

"Wheres-"

"He's already booked at the precinct, I've got my guys on it and he isn't going anywhere." Sam reassured, having known what Bucky was going to ask. They began walking to the tower, not wanting to get in a car and knowing that the walk wasn't going to be too long.

"Sorry I had to call you, I know you were probably busy. I just didn't know who else to ask." Bucky stated quietly.

"You did the right thing, Buck. You probably saved that girl's life back there." Sam smiled a bit at the man next to him and Bucky felt a smile tug at his mouth too.

They both made light conversation as they made their way back to the tower. When they did, Bucky took a deep breath. He hadn't been back here since right after Steve left. He hadn't seen Pepper in a long time either. He needed to talk to her when he got inside to thank her and to see if she was okay. He knew she probably didn't want to see him very much but she had still helped you when he asked.

Back at the tower you were finally cleared from the medical wing. You were still shaky but you were masking it pretty well and you were about back to where you functioned daily where you could fake smiles if you needed to. Pepper stayed by you the whole time and you met a little girl named Morgan who was very excited to tell you stories that put you at ease. Eventually Pepper led you to a room that she said you could use to sleep and shower in for now and that you could call the AI if you needed anything at all. You asked it to tell you when Bucky got back and it said it would. You also now knew that you recognized her as Iron Man's wife but you didn't mention it, knowing she had lost her husband semi-recently. You also recognized that Sam, who you had met earlier, was the Falcon. Then came the question of who was Bucky. You knew there was a James Barnes associated with the Avengers but you'd never seen him and you knew he had a metal arm, something that you weren't sure was  part of Bucky. You showered and cried again in the shower but this time out of relief. You realized that you didn't have to go home to that awful man and that you were finally safe.

The AI, you thought you'd heard Pepper call it FRIDAY, let you know that Bucky was in the building along with Sam. You dressed in the clothes that pepper had given to you, a pair of sweats and a loose T-shirt, and left your room. You carefully padded down the hallway, prepared to ask FRIDAY where you were if you got lost. Instead you saw Bucky down a hallway carrying a bag that you recognized as your own. Now that you were a bit calmed down you knew what you had to do. You got closer to each other, Bucky smiling slightly, and he stopped so that he wouldn't get close to you if you didn't want him to. Instead you continued walking toward him until you got close enough that you could wrap your arms tightly around his waist. He stood in shock before dropping the bag and wrapping one of his arms around you tightly. You reached out to the other one and felt the hardness of it. You guessed then that he must be the winter soldier that you'd heard about but you continued to wrap it around yourself so that he was hugging you all the way. You took a deep breath and smiled slightly.

"Thank you, James." You murmured and you heard his heart pick up its pace. He tightened his arms around you and sighed.

"You’re welcome, doll" he accepted the thanks with a bit of apprehension but this wasn't the time to argue about whether or not thanks were needed. "I promise I'm not going to let anything happen to you again." He stated quietly and he was reassuring himself more than you. Your arms tightened around him more and he decided that he would protect you with all he had if you would let him.

[circus4apsycho8]

more than a hug. | the batter x reader

Fandom: OFF

Pairing: The Batter x Reader

Warnings: jealousy, cussing

It was no surprise to you that the Elsen were very cuddly creatures. Not only that, but they were very squishy, too. You absolutely loved hugging the cute little guys! Who wouldn’t? They were warm, soft, and sweet.

The first time you had hugged an Elsen was after Dedan had finished yelling at the one. You and your beloved Batter had stepped out of the barn before you found yourself rushing over to the pitiful thing. How could you not? The poor guy looked like he was about to cry.

You were quick to scoop him into your arms. “Hush now. He’s just a mean old man. You did nothing wrong.”

He accepted your hug and buried his face into the crook of your neck. You hear him sniffle a little bit. “Th-thank you…hhh…you’re too kind.”

“You’re welcome,” you mumbled, hugging him a little tighter. You heard your Puppet awkwardly shuffle around, causing a deep chuckle to emanate from your chest. A few seconds later, you set him down onto the ground. The little Elsen had a slight blush on his cheeks.

“Miss, th-thank you and your…uh…friend here for purifying the barns. Even if it didn’t get noticed by the Inspector, we appreciate it…” he teeters off when he notices Batter glaring at him. You smack the Batter’s shoulder and smile down at the Elsen.

“You’re very welcome! Take care of yourself, alright? I think it’s about time we got a move on.” Batter remains silent as you bid the Elsen goodbye.

“I will! Good luck with…whatever you’re doing!” the Elsen wishes before the Batter grabs your hand and drags you behind him.

“Thank you!” you yell, waving at him before turning back to your Puppet.

“Dude, chill. You can let me go now,” you comment. He reluctantly releases his grip on you.

“What was that about?” he demands, looking anywhere but at you.

“He was about to cry, Batter! He was scared! I couldn’t just leave him like that!” you retort, rolling your eyes.

“He would have gotten over it.”

You sigh. “Sometimes a little kindness goes a long way, Batter.”

��

The second time you were cuddly with an Elsen is when you and Batter got stuck in the shopping mall maze. Batter was getting extremely frustrated and you just wanted to get the hell out of that blue hellhole.

So, when you and Batter found a lone Elsen who had claimed to be lost, you declared it was time to take a break.

“I’m lost,” the Elsen said, “I could make a fire with the boxes...to ward off the ghosts...but...that would be too dangerous.”

You immediately began to answer, but Batter pulled you back outside for a moment.

“Don’t answer him.”

You roll your eyes, growing annoyed. He couldn’t just boss you around like that. “He’s lost, Batter. We need to help him get out of here!”

“He can find his way out by himself.”

“Batter. He’s scared. Can’t we bring him with us? It’s only temporary. I can do all the talking, too!” you push, trying to decipher how he’s feeling. Batter frowns at your words, and not for the first time, you wish you could see his eyes. “He might attract a Spectre.”

And it was then and there you knew there was something else wrong. Throughout all of your travels, Batter had strived to attract Spectres so he could Purify them. Hell, he’d even shouted out to them in the smoke mines! So why was he so worried about attracting them now? Especially since they were much weaker here, too?

“Since when are you worried about attracting Spectres?” you grill, folding your arms and narrowing your eyes.

He doesn’t answer for a moment, clearly caught off guard. Shaking your head, you look back up at him. “Look, what’s up with you, man? This isn’t like you.”

“I don’t want him to come with us,” he answers. You don’t buy it, but at the same time you know he’s not going to crack just yet.

With a sigh, you say: “I don’t think that’s all, but I know you won’t tell me. Can’t he just come with us? Who knows, he might be of help!”

He remains silent for a few more moments, then: “Fine.”

You grin before darting back into the room. The Elsen looks up at you hopefully.

“Come on, we can help you get out,” you coo, smiling.

“Wh-what about the ghosts?” he asks.

“We can protect you from them. Trust me,” you answer before offering your hand to him. He takes it gratefully before you pull him up.

“Thank you very much, ma’am,” he replies. You hear the Batter scoff quietly from behind you.

“You’re welcome,” you respond.

“Let’s go,” comes Batter’s voice as he nearly stomps out of the room. You roll your ryes. So much for taking a break.

“Ignore him. He’s always grumpy,” you inform, taking his small hand and pulling him behind you.

…

During your trek through the exasperating maze, you noticed Batter was considerably quieter and tenser. Eventually, you had decided that he would tell you about whatever was bothering whenever it suited him. He seemed to be angry too, if the way he was taking out whatever monstrosity showed itself. It was almost like he didn’t want to listen to you but did anyway. His stubbornness grew to the point where you just allowed him to do whatever he wanted with the battles, so you could comfort the Elsen.

And when, finally, you five reached the Judge, the Elsen quickly thanked you and scampered off while Batter spoke to the Judge. You waved at the unfortunate Elsen before turning back to the conversation at hand.

“Is not this publicity so effective and efficient whilst defying the basics of consumer marketing?” the Judge says once he sees you. The two of them are facing some kind of advertisement painted on the wall.

“For silkier hair: the meat fountains of Alma,” Batter reads, clearly unamused.

“Oh, you can read? Anyway, I am glad to have found you. Maybe you can help me unravel the mystery that fate has placed before me,” the Judge comments. He glances up at you and smiles before trotting over to you. You sit down cross-legged against the wall before he crawls onto your lap. Smiling, you pet his soft fur.

“It turns out that my brother has been living in this area for many years. He has a special affinity for colors of the cool kind. Unfortunately, I have so far failed to cross his path. I have tried to betake myself to the roof of the library, where he resides. However, I found the door closed. Even the long hours of intensive, repeated meowing and compulsive scratching did not do a thing.”

“Aw, I’m sorry Judge. Is there anything we can do to help?” you question, scratching him behind his ear. He mewls in response, flipping over onto his back in a silent request for tummy rubs.

“My request is as follows: if at the bend of a corridor you happen to see Valerie, give him my greetings.”

You nod. “Will do.”

“Okay,” The Batter agrees. “Puppeteer, I’m going to go speak to Zacharie for a moment. Do you mind waiting here while I do so?”

You’re mildly surprised, but you agree anyway. “Uh, no, go ahead.”

“Thank you.” He saunters away, trusty bat in hand with Alpha and Omega following him.

You blink. “That was weird.”

“Eccentric of the Batter indeed,” agrees The Judge, “what do you think is amiss?”

“He’s been acting very…out of character lately,” you muse, “I’m not entirely sure what’s going on.” Is he mad at you? Should you be doing something differently? If so, then why isn’t he just talking to you about it? “I wonder if he’s mad at me.”

“I highly doubt that. Your beloved Puppet could never be angry with you for long,” The Judge responds.

You shake your head, causing the Judge to glance up at you. “I don’t know, Judge. If I did something wrong, he just…he needs to speak up. I guess I should ask him about that, huh?”

The Judge nods. “If you truly believe so, then communication is the sole solution.”

“Alright, then,” you sigh, sifting your fingers through his soft fur.

A few minutes later, Batter reappears in the room, the Add Ons at his side. It was then you realized he didn’t buy anything because you were the one holding the credits.

“You good?” you question as the Judge reluctantly slides off of your lap.

“Yes. We should go,” he answers, although you catch a glimpse of his cheeks, which are…wait, is he blushing? You wonder what the odd merchant had said this time around.

Before you left, however, you approached the masked merchant standing idly behind the counter.

“Ah, buenos dias, dearest Puppeteer. How could I be of assistance?”

“Could I see what you have on you?” you ask. He chuckles.

“Of course, belle femme,” he replies, showing you his wares. You’d grown used to the odd nicknames he gave you.

You ended buying a few Fortune Tickets and some meat, placing all purchased items in your inventory before bidding Zacharie goodbye. Before you can move away, however, the merchant catches your hand in his. You freeze, watching as he lifts his mask ever-so-slightly before he brings the back of your hand to his lips.

“It’s always a pleasure to serve this little ragtag team of yours. Sois prudente, jolie fille.” Releasing your hand, he chuckles at your shocked expression, smirking as he glances at your stunned Puppet.

“Th-thank you,” you stutter before Batter places his hand behind your back and pushes you out of the door.

Once you’re outside, you blink a few times before you’re able to speak again. “Dude. What. The. Fuck?”

Batter shakes his head, probably both at your choice of language and recent events. “Language. I don’t know why he’s…” he sighs.

“He’s so weird. Wait…aren’t you fluent in French? What did he say?” you question.

Batter huffs. “The first nickname was ‘beautiful woman’. The second one was ‘Be safe, pretty girl’.”

Your cheeks grow even redder upon hearing the translation. “W-what? Really?”

He nods, remaining silent as the two of you continue to the park.

“Puppeteer…” he starts, voice soft.

“Yeah?” you ask, looking up at him. He avoids your gaze blatantly.

“I…” he trails off before continuing, “I think we should rest in Zone 0 before going to the park.”

You nod, the exhaustion of getting through the maze catching up with you. “Agreed.”

…

Once you two have reached the abandoned Zone, Batter hurriedly guides you past Zacharie, despite his greeting, and ushers to the upper levels.

“Which floor would you like to stay on?” he questions.

“Here’s fine,” you respond, sliding onto the floor. He hesitates before sitting next to you and dropping his bat onto the floor. You lean your head on his shoulder, causing him to tense up a bit before relaxing.

You hear him sigh again. “I’ve upset you, haven’t I?” His voice sounds uncharacteristically sullen for a man as stoic as he usually is.

“Kind of. I just wish you would talk to me. What’s going on with you, Batter? You’ve been acting weird lately.”

He heaves yet another sigh as you straighten your neck and shift. Batter looks up at you while you move. You end up straddling him with your hands on his shoulders. He stiffens at your gentle touches. From this angle, you can finally see his eyes.

You can’t tell exactly what color his eyes are, so you reach up before grasping the brim of his hat. He catches your wrist gently before you can pull it off all the way.

“Do you mind?” you whisper. “I really want to see your eyes.”

His grip on your wrist loosens before he removes it completely. “Go ahead.”

You smile at him in a silent thank-you before you remove it.

His eyes are a pretty shade of amber. They hold a kind of exhaustion that could only be obtained by fighting for something one couldn’t accomplish.

“Your eyes are beautiful,” you comment, smiling, “why didn’t you want me to see them?”

He bites his lip for a moment before looking away. “I am not entirely sure. I guess I just…don’t want you to see my…my real ones.”

“Your real ones?” you question, tilting your head slightly.

“Yes,” he confirms, placing a hand on your cheek. “I don’t want to scare you.”

“You won’t, Batter. Will you show me, please?” you ask, enjoying the feeling of his hands.

“Very well,” he says, “will you close your eyes for a moment?”

You obey quietly, pressing a hand against his. His hands are much bigger than yours as well as drier and calloused from using his bat so much.

“You may open your eyes now.”

Upon opening them, you find that his amber orbs have been replaced with four eyes. The irises are a deep shade of burgundy while the rest of the eye is a pretty crimson color.

“Whoa,” you breathe, removing your hand in order to trace the skin around his eyes. Even though it’s definitely unnatural for a human, he still looks handsome. “Those are even cooler!”

“You think so?” he questions, still unsure.

“Yes. I mean…I’ve never met anyone with red eyes before. I…I think they look even better than your other ones,” you confess, smiling shyly at him.

He studies your face for a moment before a teensy little smile lights up his face. “Thank you, Puppeteer. Thank you.”

You chuckle. “That’s what you get for having a pretty face. Now,” you lean back a little. “What’s been going on with you?”

His little blush is back, which almost makes you giggle. “Well…it has to do with what I talked to Zacharie about earlier.”

“Oh?”

“Yes. I…whenever I saw you hugging the Elsen or just…being affectionate with someone else, it made me angry. I wasn’t sure what exactly why I was; after all, you were just trying to be comforting. I knew Zacharie would have an answer, and he did. He informed me that…I should tell you. I wasn’t sure how. Eventually, he told me that…I was…jealous.”

You chuckle. “If you wanted a hug you should’ve just asked,” you respond, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling yourself to him. Burying your face into the crook of his neck, you smile as you feel him return it with a relieved smile. He loosely wraps his strong arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

You note that he smells like…bubblegum? Not just any bubblegum, but the kind that’s sort of stringy? Like the baseball gum. You chuckle, inhaling his scent.

Suddenly, he slides his hands up to your neck and he gently pushes you back a little bit, rubbing the tips of his thumbs over your jawline. You move your hands to his chest, right over his heart. It steadily beat beneath your fingertips. After that, your gaze sinks down to see his lips: they’re dry and chapped, but still so, so kissable.

The Batter releases a grunt before he pulls you forward, and your lips collide. He’s gentle and slow at first, testing the waters. When the two of you break apart for a moment, you go in for another one again; this time around, it gets a little more heated.

His hands slide back down to your waist, where he pulls your torso to his. You find your hands tangled in his ivory white hair. You feel him running his hands along your curves, to the small of your back, then retreating to your waist again.

You’re pulled back by the need for air. As you gaze into his red eyes, you recollect just why you love this man. He had protected you, tried to help you when no one else would. Even when he did get a little snappy, it was because he wasn’t exactly sure what to make of both the situation and his own feelings. It was there when you were looking at him, you realized he felt the same way.

He breathes your name, brushing a hand against your cheek again. You can tell he’s at a lost for words.

“I had a feeling you wanted more than a hug.”

[221bshrlocked]

II. Teach Me

Shiny & New Masterlist

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Fem!Reader

Words: 2410 (can you believe I wrote something under 4K?)

Warnings: Inapropro touches in public. Confessions. Oral sex (male receiving).

A/N: Here is part two you hoes. Let me know how I’m doing in the comments please. I think this may be the shortest thing I’ve written in two years?

It wasn't that things were weird between the two of you after that night. It was that things weren't, far from it actually. Pedro was more touchy, and if you weren't overthinking things, he was more flirty as well. And the odd thing was, he didn't even care if anyone was around. He constantly found a way to touch you, whether it was a quick nudge to your waist or a soft caress of your lower back as he passed behind you. And then there were the dangerous smiles and low-key remarks full of innuendoes. You thought you were imagining all of this but there was no denying the bulge you felt against your back when he pulled you into his lap as soon as you stepped into the jacuzzi.

You said nothing of it, trying your hardest to continue whatever conversation you were having with Sarah without giving yourself or him away. He laughed at something Sarah said and leaned over, briefly kissing your shoulder blade before slithering one arm across your navel and pushing you down harder on him. You bite back a moan when you feel him twitch against you, unintentionally digging your nails into his thighs when his other hand slowly dips beneath your swimsuit piece.

It's a battle of who's a better actor, with Pedro pretending he was just having a chat and you trying to not make it obvious that you were practically getting fingered in front of your best friends. The lighter his touches became, the more difficult it was to keep it together. What was only a few minutes felt like hours and you sighed in relief when Oscar said that lunch was ready. You waited until everyone left the pool area before you turned around and looked at Pedro.

"Are you out of your mind?" There was no malice in your voice and Pedro smiled before leaning over and kissing down your neck.

"Yes...fuck, yes I am baby. I'm so goddamn crazy for you hermosa. You drive me mad...dreaming of you every night only to wake up with nothing but the memory of you in my arms." You melt into his embrace, trying not to make any noise as he bites down on your skin and leaves marks where his hands could reach,

"Pe-Pedro...please, I- I need..."

"I know what you need baby, I know exactly what you need. And I'll give it to you real good sweetheart...just stay over. D-don't leave, please. Stay here with me...stay here with me." There's a shift in his tone and you can't help but feel like there's perhaps more to this than you thought. And the hope that flutters through your heart doesn't scare you as much as you thought it would.

"Please oh god..." The hand around your waist is trailing up your stomach and you finally give in to him as he cups and kneads at your tits.

"Fucking tell me you'll stay querida." Pedro shakes you in his arms once, pulling at the hair on the nape of your neck until your throat was exposed to him. He licks the skin of your chest up to your jaw and hums at the taste of you, pulling away just in time to see goosebumps erupt on your skin.

"I'll- fuck...I'll stay. I'll stay...n-not going anywhere. I-"

"Sweet fucking girl...never letting you go now." Pedro whispers as he molds his lips with yours, swallowing your moans and deepening the kiss when you gasp at his needy touches.

You inhale deeply when he finally lets you go and stands up. By the time you're opening your eyes, Pedro is looking down and smiling devilishly at you. He stills has his arms wrapped around your back and chuckles at you when your knees buckle at feeling him so near to you.

"That good huh?" You're looking away when he winks, quickly moving out of the spa area and grabbing a towel while Pedro drys his chest and puts on a shirt. Your eyes scan the backyard and when you don't find anyone, you dare to turn around, eyes widening in embarrassment when you see Pedro fixing himself through his swimsuit.

He walks towards you and helps you put on your dress, never once breaking eye contact as his hands move across your wet skin.

"Hurry the fuck up baby chicken!" You snap out of your haze when you hear Oscar yelling from inside, smiling at Pedro as he grabs your hand and moves towards the house.

The rest of the day goes by quickly, with Pedro glancing at you every once in a while and waiting until you smile at him before he goes back to whatever he was doing. You hope you're not reading too much into this, especially now that there were more emotions involved than before. It felt like he was perhaps as nervous as you but there was no way that was true. A man who touched you so shamelessly in front of your friends wouldn't suddenly grow nervous over you staying over. Right?

"Alright heart eyes, I'll see you later." You pretend you don't hear Oscar teasing Pedro as he's leaving, waving your goodbyes as you begin to clean up after everyone. You hear the front door close and immediately head to the kitchen, trying to not seem too nervous now that you're left alone with Pedro.

A solid warm body creeps up from behind you and you drop the plate in the sink when you feel Pedro's hands crawling up your stomach.

"I satisfied myself all of these weeks with the mere thought of you hermosa..."

You shiver at his hoarse voice, shutting your eyes and allowing your head to fall back on his shoulder as he begins to leave a trail of wet kisses down your throat.

"How does that make you feel baby? Knowing that I can't stop thinking about you...fuck sweetheart you're the prettiest goddamn sight in the world." Pedro is turning you around in his arms in an instant, shoving his tongue down your throat and keeping you flush against him as he makes his way back to the couch, the same couch he almost fucked you on not a whole month ago.

"Pedro...oh god, please. I- want to...to-"

"What do you want baby? I'll give you anything, everything...just please let me keep kissing you." His desperate pleas twist the inside of your stomach and you reluctantly lay a hand on his chest and push him away. Pedro's eyes panic and he lets go of you immediately, not wanting to force you into anything you didn't want.

"Wait...I- I want to know what this is," you motion between the two of you, ignoring the way he's licking his lips and looking back at you, "because- fuck, this is harder than I thought it would be. I can't lose you Pedro but I can't lie and pretend that I don't...want more with you. Ever since what we did, I can't- it's like everything made sense all of a sudden. I don't know why I never thought of this but you were so sweet and caring and kind and everything perfect. I can't do this if you aren't...if you just want to-" Pedro suddenly steps forward and takes hold of your neck, making sure you're meeting his gaze before he opens his mouth.

"I wasn't lying when I said I'm crazy about you querida. And- if I'm being honest, I've had these feelings long before you asked me to sleep with you. Ever since I met you baby, I always pictured you in my arms, having lunch with me, staying over every night...coming to events with me. I wanted you then and I want you now." His words are soothing and you shut your eyes and lean into the palm of his hand before you decide to ask him what you've been dying to know ever since the morning.

"Why didn't you say anything Pedro?" I could have been with you for so long.

"Because...I didn't think you'd ever consider me." Pedro looks away when he confesses his fear, not wanting to see the look on your face should you agree with him.

"Are you serious?" You frown at him and almost pull away when he smiles sadly at you.

"I'm older than you sweetheart, a lot older than you. The thought of you rejecting me was...unbearable."

He's shocked when he feels your arms wrap dramatically around his neck just as your lips seek his own. But he's pulling you in soon after, smiling when you moan and beg for him to bring you closer to him.

"I'll take it you don't mind then?" He asks between kisses, laughing when you push him down on the couch and straddle him. His hands are roaming your back before he squeezes and grasps at your ass. He can already himself harden beneath you the more you buck your hips against him.

"Fuck baby you're a dream...my fucking dream." There is a hint of reluctance in his voice and you let go of him and look into his eyes as you whisper your assurances.

"I'm here Pedro...not going anywhere. I promise." He's about to lean up again to taste your lips when you move down his body and kneel between his thighs.

"Wha- what're you doing honey?" He gulps at the sight of you kneeling at his feet, pupils dilating as soon as he feels your hands cupping his cock through his shorts.

"I want to taste you Pedro, please. You- you promised. Please, will you teach me? Will you teach me how to take your cock in my mouth? I want you to come down my throat...want to know how to touch you, pleasure you...make you lose control." Your words are enough to make him hard. Pedro can't believe what he's hearing and your request shoots straight to his dick when he realizes that this is probably your first blowjob.

"Fuck...yeah alright go on baby. Touch me, take what you want...let me feel those pretty lips wrapped around me cock." Pedro raises his hips just as you pull down his shorts, moaning when he sees the way you eye his cock like you were about to feast on him.

"God...I touched myself every night Pedro...picturing your cock sliding into my pussy, stretching me out...filling me up. But you're so much thicker than I remember. So thick and hard for me. Is- is this all for me?" He's sure you're not aware of the effect you're having on him or else you would stop so he wouldn't come so soon.

"Yeah honey, it's for you. All for you. Why don't you be a good little girl and open your mouth. Open it sweetheart and take my cock. Go on, I'll be gentle." He thumbs your jaw and clenches his jaw when you slowly take the head of his dick between your lips. He forces himself to not buck his hips against you, knowing that you needed to get used to the size of him before he tried anything. The curiosity etched on your face as you explore him makes him wish he could push you down on all fours and fuck you until you couldn't remember anything but his name. But he bites into his lower lip to try and have a semblance of control over his body.

"Oh ff-fuck...so wet and warm. Pretty girl...sweet fucking girl." His words make you moan around him and you shut your eyes to try and take him a little deeper. Pedro is torn between keeping his eyes open to commit every single moment to memory and shutting it to enjoy the softness of your throat. But he keeps them open, watching as you switched between licking the precum rolling down his length and sucking on the side of his cock while you rubbed the tip.

"Shit fuck baby...it's okay. You- you don't have to sweetheart...we'll get you there. I'll train this cute mouth of yours to gag on my cock...just enjoy this for now, fuck. So good. So fucking good." Pedro is looking at you with desperation and neediness in his eyes and you pull back to lick at the underside of his cock before leaving wet kisses on his balls. His grip tightens around your hair, unable to decide whether that was the most innocent or the filthiest fucking thing he's ever seen. You're not shy anymore, and Pedro enjoys the sight of you as spit drools down your chin and onto his dick. You're messy and wet and shameless in your touches. Absolutely fucking beautiful.

"You taste so good," it's a faint whisper but his cock twitches in your hand at the exclamation and he gulps nervously when he feels your grip harden around his dick. Fucking hell, how's he already so close?

"Please baby, let me come. Want to come down your throat, fill you up before I fuck this tight cunt again. Take my cock hermosa...take it like the filthy little girl you are. Shit, baby I'm so close...so- so fucking close." He finally throws his head back when your lips enclose around him again, breathing growing erratic when warm hand jerks off the rest of him while the other cups his balls. He's moaning your name and swearing all sorts of curses in Spanish, never once noticing how much it turns you on when he loses control.

"Shit shit fuck oh god- oh baby baby I'm- cuh..coming ff-fuck!" You take him just a tad bit deeper right before you feel hot, long spurts of cum shooting down your throat. It almost feels like he's coming for minutes on end and you squeeze and suck on his dick until he gets too sensitive and pushes you off of him. Pedro looks down just in time to see you collect the cum trailing down your chin and lick it off of your thumb.

"Fucking beautiful." He whispers and mirrors your smile before he pulls you up into his lap again. You're shocked when he kisses you, moaning in surprise when you feel his tongue exploring your mouth. When Pedro finally pulls away to allow you to breathe, he's laughing again at the hazy look on your face.

"W-was I any good?" The reluctance and shyness in your voice makes him almost grow hard again.

"Well, practice does make perfect sweetheart. And I plan on practicing with you all night long."

Taglist: @pastel-0-princess​ @feelmyroarrrr​ @libbymouse​ @its--fandom--darling​ @spideysimpossiblegirl​ @princess76179​ @cheekygeek05​ @miraclesoflove​  @purple-mango​ @freeshavocadoooo​ @metalarmsandmanbuns​ @acthenerd​

[rushipedia]

PLSSSS Kaeya x Gn reader who is younger and smaller than him and the reader lovessss head pats. The reader usually don't talk much but when it comes to Kaeya they are totally opposite of it. The reader is very inpatient with most people and gets angry easily but when they get a head pat from kaeya their mood changes.And they will never get angry or mad at him.

Ignore if you feel don't like writing this

: (( it's ok.

A Not-So-Peaceful Lunch Break

A/N: AS YOU WISH, ANON!! This is a very cute and oddly specific ask. I can relate with only being myself around a couple of people, so i think this ask is very good!!! ty for this! and sorry...kaeya is definitely the type of guy that orders for you....

edit: bro im watching act 3 of the new event and i keep getting distracted albedo is so attractive. also i think i projected a little bit onto y/n in this fic i am very sorry

Gender-neutral reader, ofc! REQUESTS ARE OPEN!

Word Count: 792

Pairing: Kaeya x GN!Reader

Flavor: Fluff, slice of life

Warnings: Deadly fluff, Kaeya looking at you with a heart so full of love it could explode at any moment

"Y/N!" Jean called after you as you walked through the hall of the Knights of Fevonious, carrying a stack of papers. She smiled brightly at you and took the stack of papers you were holding from your hands.

"Please, let me take this." She said. It surprised you, to say the least.

"Kaeya is currently out surveying the town's shops if you'd like to join him." She looked, knowingly down at you. She knew about your relationship and didn't mind pairing you two together often as long as it didn't disturb your work. You glanced up at her with a slightly annoyed look- she'd interrupted your workflow- but nodded your head quickly. You'd been filing papers all day, so you hadn't had a chance to see him.

"You can continue your current task when you return," She said as you walked away. You waved energetically but didn't say a word as you left.

"Y/N!" Kaeya called as you passed by the Good Hunter. You'd almost missed him in your search for him. Your mind was clouded by the slightly angering thought that you'd be working a lot slower once you got back and it would take longer to finish your tasks. He noticed.

You didn't often have to convey your feelings to him through words, he could read between the lines well enough.

"Jean interrupt you again?" He asked, raising his hand up to pat you on your head. You nodded. "She means, well, you know."

"I know," You mumbled, leaning into his hand as he continued to pet you.

"I was about to get some lunch, want to join me, darling?" He asked, motioning towards the tables at the good hunter. You nodded. His hand stayed on your head until you started moving towards the counter.

"What do you want to eat?" He asked, crossing his arms and leaning his head on top of yours while you both looked at the menu.

"Barbatos Ratatouille," You hummed, "I really need a pick-me-up."

"As you wish, darling." He hummed against your hair, before taking out his pouch of mora. "Hey, Sara, add a Barbatos Ratatouille onto my order."

He slides her some mora before the two of you walk over to the tables.

"I can order for myself," You huff. It's kind of annoying when he does that, but it's less interaction for you, so you can't really be mad.

"I know, darling." He hums.

"How many of the shops have your surveyed?" You ask, changing the subject.

"All except for Flora's store. Grand Master Jean also gave me the daunting task of finding out the identity of that wandering merchant." He said, pulling a paper out of his bag. "The locals say his name is Liben. It's an odd one if you ask me."

He laughs to himself as Sara brings your food to your table.

"Thank you, Sara." He says giving her a smile. She glances at you, and you nod hastily in agreement.

"Eat up," He hums.

"Is it that guy that wears the sunglasses?" You ask between bites of your food.

"I believe so,"

"Ah, one time he traded me some silly-looking gems for carrots, so it doesn't seem like a scam at the very least." You said. "I'll show you them later."

"I'd love to see them. I'm sure they're as beautiful as you are." He said, resting his chin in his hand and staring at you lovingly. You didn't even have time to get embarrassed someone jostled your chair, causing you to spill some of your food onto your clothing.

You sat there shocked for a moment before looking down at the assailant of your mellow afternoon. It was Bennett.

"Are you okay?" Kaeya asks, standing to help Bennett up. He then moved to stand behind your chair.

"Yep!" Bennett says, recovering quickly. He nervously rubs the back of his neck and looks down at you. "Gee, I didn't mean to do that, I'm really sorry."

You glared at him for a moment, before casting your glance away. You were quite annoyed, but it was an accident, so it wasn't anyone's fault.

"It's my bad luck acting up again, I'll buy you new clothes!" He says, pressing his hands together and bowing his head.

"It's okay, Bennett." You said, giving him a smile. "The day was getting pretty boring anyway."

He looked so relieved that you weren't mad at him.

"Do you want to eat with us?" You asked him, looking up to Kaeya to see if he was okay with it too. He simply nodded, patting your head again.

"Really?" He said, his eyes lighting up. "Of course!"

You and Kaeya got back to talking as Bennett went to order. Lunch was very lively that day.

rushipedia ☆ 2021

[capt-spooki3]

...And Sunrises Were Worse

A sequel to Sunsets Never Felt The Same...

Pairing: Revivebur and Reader

Warnings: blood mentions, fighting, angsty feelings, kissing, manipulativebur

Y/n was finally recovering after the unfortunate demise of their lover just to find, he is back and better than ever...

3.6k words

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Y/n watched him from afar, arms open wide as he took in the rays from the rising sun.

“This is my sunrise..”

Hearing the words from him sent chills through their whole body. Watching him stand there, alive and grinning like a mad man, made them sick. Whether it was from shock, disbelief, or anger they weren’t sure yet.

It had been nine whole years that he had been gone and the only piece of him left was his ghost. Ghostbur was a comforting presence, but it just took so much for them not to try and question Ghostbur on why he left them. Not only did his ghost not remember them, but they learned quickly that he had no memory of his past mistakes.

They never expected his lonely soul to be so innocent and sweet, especially after seeing face to face how far he had fallen once he lost his darling country. That last glimpse of him they got, shook them to their core and took years to recover from. Though honestly, it never fully left them. They were ready to move on and look for love in someone that wasn’t six feet under. But there stood their former lover, watching as Tommy, Tubbo, and Ranboo walked away from him with Friend following close behind. He was smiling in a manic way, looking the exact same way he did when he kissed them and ran off to face his demise but this time there was something different that they just couldn’t place their finger on. Maybe it was that this time, he had a will and a want to be alive.

Y/n shook their head, letting a shiver run down their spine as they turned and started to walk away, not wanting to look at him anymore and hoping that they would just be able to forget he had come back to life.

“My dearest sunflower... “ They stopped in their tracks as they heard the voice say softly, just loud enough for his words to reach them. They held their breath, hoping to hear him speak again or not at all, while a cold sweat went down their back. Everything stood quiet like the world was holding its breath along with Y/n.

“Don’t ignore me now, love. Please, turn and look at me. I want to see your face again, it’s been too long.”

“What the hell are you doing here- yOU WERE GONE WILBUR! YOU WERE GONE! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO STAY GONE!” They balled up their fists and squeezed their eyes tight to try and not let the tears slip through. Emotions that have been kept under wraps for years were finally coming forth to plague their mind. All from hearing his sugar-coated voice again, but they knew all that laid under the tooth-rotting exterior anymore was pure venom.

“Y/n… please don’t be upset. I’m back. I’m here, I can make things better than ever.” His voice was growing closer and was only unraveling them farther.

“NO! Wilbur stop- stop moving. Don’t come closer.” They pleaded, voice growing frail as tears were trying harder to run free. “Please…”

“Listen to me at least, darling.”

“No. I won’t.

“Y/n.” He sounded like he was warning them to comply. A big red waving flag telling them that even in death, he hasn’t changed.

“I’m leaving, and once I’m gone. So are you.” They started walking down the small mound of rubble they were watching him from as soon as they finished their sentence and picking up the pace as soon as their feet hit the glass that kept them from falling into the crater of L’manburg.

“Y/N!!” Wilbur called out to them desperately. “H-Hold on, just wait!” But they didn’t stop, they didn’t even look back and just kept their eyes on the swirling vines that tainted the space below them.

Harsh footsteps rang out on the glass, they sounded like boots as they clicked nicely. Suddenly they were pulled back when a hand grabbed onto their arm to stop them, Wilbur took small gasps as he caught his slightly extended breaths. Y/n looked back at him and finally looked him in the eyes again after nine years. His mouth hung open just a little as he steadied his breathing. Dirt was smudged on one cheek while a bit of blood was dried on the other and a long past dried bloody nose. He looked tired too, very apparent bags were under his eyes now though his glasses sat perfect and untouched on his nose. The red in his eyes was so easy to see and up close made it even more unsettling especially as he looked at them so fondly and softly like he never stopped loving them even in death.

“Don’t leave me, please.” He whispered, pulling them just a bit closer, looking like a puppy pleading for their owner not to go to work.

“Wilbur. It has been nine years. Nine years you’ve been gone, nine years tha-”

“Thirteen years!” He leaned forward just lightly as he emphasized the number. Y/n stopped and just looked at him, confused by him one upping them.

“What?”

“I have been in limbo for thirteen years Y/n. An empty train station. No exit. No one else there to help. I screamed and clawed at the walls. I was stuck there for so, so long. But I never forgot you. I missed you so much.” Wilbur finally let their arm go and let his arm fall back to his side, looking defeated. “I can’t tell you how many times I relived memories of you just to make me feel something again. Like… remember our sunset?” He looked down through the glass floor, smiling sweetly as he was obviously thinking back on the time. But Y/n simply looked at him in disbelief and almost disgust that he was thinking of them.

“Do you even realize how much it hurts? The things you told me before you went and got yourself killed? I held onto that for so many years, Wilbur.” He fixed his gaze back on them, his smile having been lost as soon as they started talking. “I was so ready to be healed from you and pursue love. Just… be happy. I haven’t forgotten you, but that’s because you hurt me so.. so bad.”

They let out a shuddering breath and took a few steps back from him to which he started to reach for them but stopped himself, lowering his hands to his sides and dropping his shoulders.

“I’m leaving. And I need you to let me leave and forget I was ever here.” They demanded once and for all before turning sharply and walking away from him.

“CAN YOU… can you stay. For just… for just a bit. Till sunset. Let me stay with you.” Y/n slowed to a stop when hearing his sad request. “Sunset can be the limit and you can bring me back here and I won’t follow you. Please just… Can you give me this?”

They sighed deeply, their addiction to his voice returning much faster than they hoped it would. They started to move again but not before calling back to him.

“Well come on then. I told myself I’d sort the books at the library today.” Y/n knew they didn’t need to wait for him because a few paces in and he had caught up to their side, hands in his pocket as he took smaller strides by their side.

“You finally built the library you always talked about?” Wilbur asked fondly, they could feel the constant glances he was throwing their way, and frankly, it took a lot of effort not to look back at him.

“Actually Foolish did it for me, I commissioned him. It looks really good too, almost everyone frequents it. I’ve even gotten Techno and Phil to drop by a good number of times.” They found their way onto the Prime Path as it made the walk to the library the easiest amongst all the rugged land.

“Yeah? I bet that Ranboo guy is there a lot, he looks like a bookworm.”

“He stops by quite a bit, yeah... Ghostbur was always there though.” They said as their voice grew softer. “Unless he was traveling around or visiting others to spread his blue, he was sitting there with Friend and reading.”

Wilbur didn’t try to make any comment after that and Y/n had to give him that. At least he still knows when it was best to shut up and bear the silence.

The rest of their walk remained rather quiet other than little comments here and there and Wilbur requested a quick walk by the museum once he saw it. Even though they could have cared less about what he wanted, Y/n agreed to walk by it since it wouldn’t set them off their path too much. They couldn’t help but admire him as he was now, they always thought Ghostbur was the actual soul AND mind of Wilbur with just amnesia. After being around him for so long, they got the urge to explain events to him whenever he would mention them, just to be reminded that he was there and remembered it all.

-

“Oh, so this must be the library ey?” Wilbur said excitedly as he stared at the two-story building and nodded in approval. “Gotta tell that Foolish guy he did a good job.”

Y/n laughed a little and went in with Wilbur close behind and quietly observing the interior.

“Go ahead and do whatever you want, I’ll be… kinda everywhere do just call if you need anything okay?” They glanced back to him to see his eyes already on them, smiling softly before he nodded.

“I can help too if you need it.”

“Uh- no. No, I’ll be fine, thank you.” They said quickly before rushing to start upstairs and get some distance between him, still not all that comfortable being so close to a man that was dead mere hours ago. They knelt down to a bookshelf and went on autopilot while they sorted through and put books in the right order.

It was so hard for their mind to fully process that he was revived. They overheard Tommy when he met up with Tubbo and Ranboo so they heard the whole story and followed behind secretly. They watched from afar when they found Wilbur but sadly didn’t hear most of what he had to say out of pure shock that he was standing right there without a sword through his chest. As much as they wanted to completely forget about his existence, They doubted they would be able to get rid of him now. All they could hope is that he would keep his distance and not be kind enough to make them fall in love with him all over again.

Hours passed by in minutes for them and they were finished with the top floor of books and went downstairs to find Wilbur standing there with obviously freshly baked bread, contemplating walking up the stairs.

“Y/n! Sorry um… here.” He offered the small loaf to them, he didn’t have his gloves on anymore and his hands were cleaned. “You’ve been working hard, but you need to take care of yourself.”

They took the bread from him carefully, taking a piece and trying to find it surprisingly good. He must have gotten it from the bakery.

“Thank you, Wilbur…. You eat too.” They took their leave into the rows of bookshelves to distance themself and eat near one of the back windows.

Things weren’t looking good for them at this rate.

-

“Alright Wilbur, got all your things? I’ve got to walk you back then go home.”

Wilbur hopped up from the chair he was sitting in, pulling his gloves out of his pockets and slipping them both on before adjusting his coat.

“Yep, all ready. Lead the way.”

And lead they did, though this time they took the more remote path down to his shrine. They took the path that Phil and his group used when they were first trying to revive Wilbur by using Ghostbur. It was calmer and it let Wilbur see other parts of the nearby area that he didn’t before.

“You know… Y/n. Have you ever been down here at night?” Wilbur asked as they were nearing the shrine.

“Huh? Oh, no I haven’t. Not since… you know.” They cast a quick glance to their side at him. “It doesn’t bring back the best memories so I try to avoid it.”

“Right, right, that makes sense.” He went quiet, but it was obvious he wanted to add on and most likely ask them something.

“Why?”

“Well, I saw them earlier and thought they looked rather nice. Did you see the floating lanterns? There were just a few, but they stood out to me among all the destroyed land.” He took a breath and looked over at them until they met his eyes. “I wanted to ask you if you could stay and look at them with me.”

Y/n just looked at him, expressionless and not saying a word.

“Look, the sun is literally already setting. Just for a few minutes, please? We can uh- we can stand on the other side of the shrine and look at them. Okay?” He looked up at the sunset before it was hidden by the land. “Just before you leave.”

“Just before I leave.” They softly echoed him and got a rushed thank you as he picked his pace up now.

They finally reached the stone steps that led to the shrine and Wilbur happily took the lead, walking to the backside of the shrine to lean up against the lapis wall. Y/n fell back against it and sighed, closing their eyes and being thankful for a moment to rest. They opened their eyes and looked up at the lanterns floating nearby, glowing brightly against the land now that the sun was set. They let themself slip away while watching the calming float of the lanterns.

Feeling eyes on them, they looked over to Wilbur. He didn’t even try to look away, just looking at them with a distant gaze and hands resting in his pockets. He looked numb as he silently watched despite the soft rosy look of his cheeks. There was something there they could only describe as numb and lovesick. As odd as it sounds, it fits.

“Wilbur-”

“Shh just let me… you look too lovely right now.”

They felt the heat rising to their face as much as they hated to feel it with him. It felt too right to hear it from him again and their mind pushed them to beg him to say those words again.

“I… I need to go home.” Y/n whispered to him, not even sure if that’s what they wanted anymore.

“I know, but darling I’m selfish.” He spoke softly to match their tone. They looked away to let out their held breath and contemplate what they were supposed to do. With a deep and grounding breath, they looked back at him. As much as they were ready to tell him they were leaving him here alone, him giving obvious glances to their lips just stopped them from being able to go forward with it.

With a soft bite of his lip, he tore his gaze away and sighed as looked up at the star-speckled sky, resting his head back. They were frozen now, admiring him this time. They swore they wouldn’t fall again but look at them now, ready to throw caution to the wind.

And they did.

Y/n closed the distance between them willingly for the first time that day and grabbed onto the arm of his jacket to get his attention, just above the L’mamburg flag patch that was covered with old dirt and blood. He looked down at them with wide eyes, very obviously surprised to see them so close.

“Are you… okay?”

“I-... I don’t know.” They admitted, meaning it completely. Wanting any of him now felt wrong but with someone as addicting and beautiful as him, what were they to do? “I want to leave… but I can’t.”

Wilbur snickered, bringing a gloved hand up to rub their cheek softly.

“Can’t or don’t want to?”

They opened their mouth to answer but were just met with blank thoughts, knowing he was right.

They just stood there, looking at each other and neither one making any advancements or turning away to end it.

“If I… Wilbur, if I kiss you right now, what will you do?”

“Well, Y/n I might just not be able to let you go. So if you want to leave and never see me again, then go. I won’t stop you. But sunshine, if you kiss me right now I won’t be able to keep myself away.” He opened his hand up to put it fully on their cheek, holding them as though this contact meant the world to him. They leaned into his hand just a little, not breaking eye contact.

They thought hard about if this was really a good idea. They still had the time to back out if they wanted to, it wasn’t too late for them to keep him out of their life forever and not try to get to know him all over again.

It was a good idea to leave. The best and smartest idea even, but even still they chose the latter.

“You’re an evil man, Wilbur Soot.” They muttered before grabbing onto the collar of his jacket, pulling his face down to theirs, and kissing him hard, making both of them stumble a bit by Wilbur being off balance. His hands found their way back to their cheeks immediately though, holding them so softly. He pulled them closer, not seeming to want to give this moment a chance to leave. Y/n pulled away finally to catch their breath, they couldn’t help but look at his eyes just to find that he was crying. He was smiling as well though. The sight made tears prick their own eyes though they blinked hard to try and hold them back. Before, seeing him in tears never failed to make them cry. They could never figure out why but it still held true.

"Why are you crying, you idiot? '' They mumbled just before he put his forehead to theirs and closed his eyes, taking in a deep yet shaky breath.

"You’re finally back in my arms… after so long of wishing for you.” He pulled their face to him to kiss them again and laugh softly. “It’s just crazy.”

He leaned back when he slid his hands off their cheeks, but not before running his hand through their hair and sighing as he looked at them. “Y/n… I need you to listen to me, okay?” He still spoke sweetly, but something seemed to lay underneath the surface of this and this time they could tell.

“Okay… but I don’t know if I can trust what you are going to say.”

“No no love! Please,” He reached down to grab and hold both of their hands close to his chest as he looked into their eyes. “You can trust me. You can. I just… I have things I need to do now that I’m back. And these things, I know some people aren’t going to agree with, but no matter what happens. As long as you stay on my side, I can promise you the world.”

Wilbur leaned in close to them, voice growing quiet now but the small smile he bore looked sinister. “I can promise you the world because I am going to capture the world in my hands. And as long as you’re mine, it will be yours as well.” He stroked their hands with his thumbs comfortingly as if to smooth over the words he just told them.

“Wilbur… I have friends. People I think of as family and if you end up hurting them I…” They trailed off, looking away from him and at the rubble of L’manburg and reflecting on what happened the last time he had a great goal in mind.

“That’s perfect! No, that is just perfect Y/n!” He let go of them, eyes wide along with his smile. “You have time. Think it over sunflower, I will give you time.”

He easily slipped past them and took a few strides away. Y/n turned to look at him, their mind in a hopeless scramble of pieces. The two sides of their mind battled on if they should tell him off or blindly trust him. He looked back at them, glancing away again before he walked up to them and gently lifted their chin to get a good look at him.

Memories flooded back to them with the familiar look he gave them. As much as they wished it could be a positive moment, all they saw was the man who grabbed them and kissed them as he said his adrenaline-filled goodbye. The only difference now was he wasn’t ready to die, but looked more than ready to cause any other kind of damage.

“You really are beautiful… I hope you choose me.” He held their chin and rubbed his thumb over their bottom lip before kissing them again, longer and sweeter this time before he spoke against their lips. “Find me when you’re ready. I’ll be waiting for you.”

___________________________________________

While you're here...

pss pss psss 👁👄👁 i made art for it too

[navegandoaciegas]

Broken Wings {2/2}

Pairing: Lee Bodecker x Reader

Summary: You’re a small town girl with big city dreams, set on leaving Knockemstiff and its Sheriff behind for good. Lee Bodecker would do anything to make sure you stay with him.

Warnings: smut, explicit language, non-con, breeding kink, unprotected vaginal sex, creampie, overall dark themes, kind of a slow build up to the nasty.

A/N: Sorry for the delay, I’ve had an eventful couple of days. This is part 2, read part 1 here.

The adrenaline that rushed through your veins blocked out the pain in your body and the noises around you. Your breathing came out in short, panicked huffs as you sprinted through the woods, Lee hot on your heels.

You thought back to the past 12 hours, and how they’d changed your life.

Leaving Knockemstiff and boarding a bus for New York, with your big dreams and a small bag. Almost reaching Pennsylvania’s border before your hopes were snatched away. Lee chasing said bus, blasting the sirens of his patrol car and pulling the driver over. The dread that settled in your stomach when you met his enraged stare, your hopes of a better life shattering in a million pieces, the anger and humiliation that had filled you when he’d dragged you, kicking and screaming, out of the bus, under the judgemental or pitying stares of the passengers.

“You can’t run from me, dove.”

His voice echoed in the woods, tantalizing and terrorizing you all the same. You’d managed to bolt away and hide in the woods before he could handcuff you, but you hadn’t made it too far before he’d found you.

In the event that he’d ever caught you, you’d imagined that he’d fall on his knees and beg you to stay. Lee dragging your ass out of the bus like any drunk bastard he’d escorted home after a fight was certainly not the reaction you’d expected.

You pushed the branches out of your face, feeling a new tear in the skin of your cheeks whenever you’d barrel through a bush. You had no idea where you were going, all you knew was that you had to keep running until your feet bled. Hide. Disappear.

Just a couple more miles and you’d find another town, you could catch a bus then, and maybe you’d be safe-

One second you were sprinting through the trees, and the next your foot was caught in an exposed root, and you tumbled down the slope with your arms stretched out to protect your face.

You hissed in pain when you lifted your palms from the ground. Debris stuck to the abrasion, and it burnt and stung when you flexed your hands. You tried standing up, but fell back among the leaves, feeling lightheaded.

You registered some more cuts on your knees, but you couldn’t tell whether it was blood or tears that streamed down your face.

The branches contorted around you, and the shadows they casted danced around the edges of your vision.

New York, new life, new beginning. Your mom’s smile in her Sunday dress when she’d waved you off. The stench of alcohol in Lee’s breath when he’d caught on the bus.

You thought you’d heard a voice call your name in the distance before your vision went dark, and you let the void envelop you.

-

The sky had turned dark when Knockemstiff’s rusty welcome sign came into view, and he hadn’t spoken a word to you since you’d woken up in his car, with his dark leather jacket draped over your shoulders and bandages on your bruised skin.

You’d stopped sobbing, and you’d run out of pleads, apologies, and tears.

For the first time in your life, you were afraid of him.

His car pulled to a stop in a deserted parking lot. He killed off the engine, and clenched his jaw, inhaling a deep breath before he spoke.

“What was goin’ through that dumb head of yours, sweetie? What made you think you could up, and fuckin’ leave me like that?” he bit through gritted teeth, chest heaving. “One of the boys called me this morning, said he heard your mother talk about you to one of her old hags, babblin’ ‘bout leaving for good, New York, a job.”

He let out a bitter laugh, gripping the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white.

“He thought she’d finally done lost her goddamn mind. Ain’t no sheriff’s girl leaving town for good, he said.”

“I’m sorry, Lee, I should've told you, I was selfish-”

“Yes, you fuckin’ were, fuckin’ selfish is what you are.” he screamed, and you jumped in surprise, because he’d never raised his voice at you.

“I’m sorry, I can’t give you what you want. I don’t want that. You know I don’t belong here Lee, just lemme go, forget all about me.” you pleaded once again, voice small and broken.

He stayed silent for a moment after your little rant, before bursting into a fit of laughter. His body shook with the vibration, and he clutched his stomach, as if no joke had ever sounded so fun in his ears.

“Forget about you? Sweetie, you know I can’t do that. I love you too much.”

“If you love me, let me go Lee, I’m begging you. Please.” you sobbed, gripping his hands in yours, hoping your wobbling lips would move him.

He sighed, and enveloped your hands in his warm ones, bringing them to his lips. He left a trail of kisses from the inside of your wrists to your knuckles.

“Come with me, then. Leave this shitty place behind for good, Lee. Ain’t nothing good’s come out of ‘ere anyways.”

You thought you’d seen his resolve break. You thought he’d choose you for once. Choose you over his thirst for power.

“You know I can’t do that,” he snapped, raising his voice again, “I’m so close to gettin’ myself elected, the campaign is going well, I can’t give up now.”

“Can’t or won’t?” you pressed, anger hardening your stare.

He held your gaze for a moment before looking ahead, eyes unreadable for the first time since you’d met him.

“You know I’m selfish too,” he shrugged.

He reached for his belt, and held up the metal handcuffs, wordlessly securing them around your wrists, ignoring your protests.

“Just stay here.” he grumbled before swinging the door open.

The cold, unyielding cuffs dug in your wrists as you attempted to tug them free from the metal hook on the dash where they were attached to.

It was useless, but it made you feel like you were actually trying. You were mad at Lee, of course, at whoever had tipped him off, and at yourself.

Especially at yourself for your wistful thinking, for convincing yourself that Lee would have given up on you as you’d had on him. For not running fast enough, being strategic enough.

You huffed in annoyance when the metal hook refused to give in, and fell back on the headrest with a groan.

Your calves and shins were sore from your crazy sprint in the woods, and the palms of your hands were scraped from your fall. Lee had cleaned the cuts, but they still stung when you’d inadvertently brush them against each other.

You were mostly unscathed, except for your wounded pride.

You wished your glare could incinerate Lee on the spot when he opened the door to the driver’s seat with a smirk on his lips. The car creaked and swayed when he sat down.

“Fries and vanilla shakes, your favorite.” he announced, opening up the brown paper bag on his lap.

“I’m not hungry.” you mumbled, turning your head to observe the diner’s feeble neon lights in the distance.

Your stomach chose that moment to betray you, and let out a growl when the waft of fried food reached your nose. You hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and you were starving.

“Your tummy seems to think otherwise, dove.”

You used to think that his cocky loopsided grin gave a youthful glow to his face, but now you couldn’t help but hate the satisfaction it oozed.

“Open up.” he chirped, a handful of fries in his hands.

You rolled your eyes, sighing to yourself. “You’re not actually going to do that, are ya? Just uncuff me, Lee.

“I won’t uncuff you until I’m sure I can trust that you won’t run off on me, dove. Might take a while, tho. Now open up.”

You parted your lips, deciding that this one wouldn’t be the hill you’d choose to die on. Glaring at him, you took a bite out of the fries. He hissed when your teeth snapped hard against his fingers, but let out a chuckle seeing you in the state you were in, amused by your pathetic struggle.

“Good girl.” he praised you, feeding you some more like you used to do on those long nights patrolling the streets. Back when feeding each other was an act of love, not a humiliating punishment.

“So how was your little trip in Ohio, sweetie? Enjoyed the fields?”

He hummed when you refused to speak, and brought the milkshake to your mouth, studying your lips as they closed on the striped paper straw, and your cheeks hollowing when you sucked.

“Could’ve drove you myself if you’d asked. Could’ve brought you somewhere nice on holiday this winter. Someplace outside of Ohio.” he continued, taking a sip for himself, “Maybe we can go to a beach on our honeymoon, whaddya say, huh?”

You snorted at his audacity, almost inhaling the milkshake.

“What honeymoon are you talking about, Lee? Ain’t no way I’m marrying you now.”

He shook his head again, a small smile forming on his lips.

“Yes, you are, dove. You are marrying me.”

Your eyes almost bulged out of your head as you gave him an incredulous look. Had you been blinded by love, or was he showing his true colors now?

“What, you’re gonna drag me by the hair and force me to sign the papers? Don’t think the preacher or the fine citizens of this shitty fuckin’ town are gonna like that too much.”

You scoffed, feeling your vision blur with tears again.

Lee levelled his face with yours, eyes darting between your own. You’d never noticed the darkness in him, and it made your heartbeat spike for all the wrong reasons.

“I don’t need to drag you, dove. You’re gonna come to that altar with a smile on these pretty lips. And you know why?” he whispered in your ear, and you felt a shiver go down your spine.

His calloused hand caressed your thigh, slowly hiking up your pleated skirt. “Because I’m finally gonna put a child inside you tonight, and nothing’s gonna stop me.”

Before you had time to react, or panic, he’d climbed to the passenger’s side, caging you in with his large body. He slanted his mouth against yours, forcing his tongue between your lips that you’d parted in a surprised gasp.

You pushed your shoulders against his, trying to pry him away, but he groped you relentlessly. Panic gripped you when you realized you were bound and at his mercy, and he wasn’t joking about his intentions.

“Gonna keep you chained until I knock you up, dove. Keep you in my house, can’t trust that mother of yours,” he huffed between kisses, hands roaming over your body.

“Stop, Lee, have you lost your goddamn mind? Don’t fuckin’ touch me, you asshole. Lemme go.”

You managed to kick his stomach, but in the frantic haze that had overcome him, he barely took notice, continuing his exploration of your body.

You shrieked when his hand dipped in your panties, and to your utter shame, found them soaked.

“You really want me to stop? Because your pussy is telling me a whole ‘nother story, sweetie. Feel how wet you are for me, you like this, don’t ya?”

He brought his finger to your lips, forcing your mouth open until you’d sucked him clean of your juices. He hummed when he dipped down and kissed you again, tasting your arousal on your tongue.

Your teeth snapped on his bottom lip until you’d drawn blood, and he released you with a hiss. His hand gripped your jaw, and tears began blurring your vision.

You couldn’t find adoration, love, and care in his eyes, only cruel determination.

The screams you let out sounded like a muffled gargle.

“Scream all you want, no one’s gonna hear you, and if they do, what’re they gonna say to me? I’m the sheriff sweetie, I’m the law. You were just stupid enough to think you could escape me.”

You pushed, kicked, screamed, thrashed until the metal cuffs had scrubbed your skin raw, fighting the hands that were pushing your bra down until your tits spilled out.

His fingers grazed your heated skin like they’d done a million times before, staining your loving memories forever.

“Fuck sweetheart, you’re gonna look so good with my baby inside you, all round and swollen.” he groaned, nipping at the juncture between your neck and shoulder, sucking on the skin hard enough to hurt you, “All the men in this town are gonna be jealous of me. Might have to keep you locked up all the time.”

You couldn’t deny the throbbing in your core when his tongue licked a stripe behind your ear, nor the arousal soaking through your panties when slid his hand over the hair on your mound, teasing you.

“Gonna keep these tits full of milk for a long time sweetie.”

You moaned when his thick fingers breached your entrance, feeling the pressure build up as he kept pumping them in and out of you. He kept his thumb on your clit, the way he knew you liked, until you were so sensitive and overstimulated that you couldn’t tell pain and pleasure apart.

“You can never leave me, never again. Don’t you understand, I’m nothing without you. I need you.”

He played your body so well that it made you sick.

“Please Lee,” you panted, clenching your jaw to suppress your wanton sounds, “Don’t do this. There’s no turning back from this. Please.” you pleaded, lips wobbling.

“That’s the point,” he huffed, struggling to fit in the space between the passenger’s seat and the dashboard.

He forcefully spread your legs open, making a quick work of ripping your cotton panties to shreds. Bringing his face down to your glistening cunt, he inhaled a deep breath before delving into your folds, tongue lapping at your juices. The lewd, slurping sounds soon mixed with your moans that you could no longer keep in.

By that point you didn’t know if you were fighting to keep his head where it was or to rip it out of his neck.

“You taste like heaven, so fuckin’ sweet.” he grunted before latching onto your bud, hollowing his cheeks arount it as he sucked you off.

Fireworks went off in your lower belly when pleasure exploded inside you. Waves of pleasure crashed through your body, rendering your limbs limp and heavy.

All rational thoughts thrown out the window, you melted into his body when he surged forward to slant his lips against yours. He swallowed your moans with his hungry kisses, cradling your face like the most precious artifact.

It felt wrong, yet so right. He was still Lee. Your Lee. The one who’d drive and sing with you, who’d found your dad a job after he’d lost it, who’d made love with the most care unlike any other man who’d ever laid a finger on you.

At least, that’s what you tried telling yourself when he pushed his hard, leaking cock inside your swollen cunt, and your body welcomed him in your warmth without any fight.

You both snarled when he sheathed himself inside you.

“I love you so much sweetie, I can’t lose you again.”

It was wrong and dirty, but it was okay to feel good because it was your Lee between your legs.

He hoisted your legs over his shoulders and slumped against the seat. His cock reached deeper than you thought possible, and you felt every ridge and veins slide over your walls.

Teeth clattering, bruising touches. You ached to touch him, maybe claw his eyes out or caress his chubby cheeks.

Electricity jolted every nerve ending on your body, and the next words he whimpered in your ear would have been a cold shower, had you not been so far gone already.

“I’m gonna fuckin’ cum inside you, dove, fill you up with my cum over and over again until I’m sure I’ve put a baby in you. Fuck-”

He snapped his hips harder against yours, thrusting his cock in and out of you. Your cunt quivered around him, gripping him tightly. He pushed you over the edge over and over again, until you were a drooling mess who couldn’t form coherent thoughts anymore.

“I told you sweetie, it’s only a matter of time.” He punctuated each world he panted in the crook of your neck with a harsher thrust of his hips. “Ain’t no more parking lots, just a big ole bed. Yeah, people like me in this town, you know that, dove. I’ll get myself elected-, get a- cushy place up on Brewer Heights. We’ll be happy, have kids and all. My pretty wife, fuck- every man in this shitty town will envy me.”

You bucked your hips against his, wildly chasing your release. He could feel another one of your orgasms near by the way you clenched around him.

“Fuck-, God, you’re squeezin’ me. Fuckin’ cum on ny cock dove, I want to feel you come all over me, make a mess on me.”

You pushed out the muscles of your pelvis, and the intensity of your pleasure almost blacked you out again as you gushed all over him, soaking through your skirt onto the seat.

His cock swelled and twitched, and he released himself inside you, painting your walls with his hot spurt. The feeling was unlike anything you’d ever felt before, a fullness you never thought you could experience.

Your chest heaved as you slumped on the seat, arms aching and wrists scrubbed raw.

His cock softened inside you, and he watched enthralled his seed spill out of your cunt, your abused hole still clenching around nothing.

“Jesus, I hope it takes, dove.”

He droned some more, but you’d stopped listening. You kept staring ahead, letting him dress you back again like a motionless doll.

Had you been more aware, you would have seen the shadow of guilt creep on his face, soon replaced by cool determination when he blinked the tears away and hardened his stare once again.

Your body didn’t feel like your own anymore.

Static noises interrupted his actions.

“Any cars around-...got a call from Hawk at the bar- anyone can check that out?”

“Fuck,” he groaned, picking up the radio, “I wanted to go at it a few more times, just to make sure.”

Minutes, or maybe hours, passed by in a blur. You had no idea where you were, or how long it’d been since he dragged you back in this hellhole.

New York, a new job, a new beginning. It all seemed so far.

There was only one thing you knew for sure.

“I’m getting out of ‘ere again, Lee.” You murmured in a daze, “I’m getting out and God himself couldn’t stop me if he tried.”

Drained of all energies, you let the soothing sway of the car lull you to sleep.

Lee sighed to himself, watching you so defensless, bound at his mercy. He’d take care of you until the end of his miserable life, and protect you from everything, even yourself.

“I'm the only God here, sweetie, and I can assure you, you’re not going anywhere.”

Afterall, his dove couldn’t fly away from him with broken wings.

-

I hope you enjoyed this! Please, leave some feedback. It means the world to me! 💓

[instasiswetrust]

"Guys! Oh, I'm so glad you're here!" Dustin risks bowling over Mike, Lucas, and Will with the exuberance of his hug but there's no way he can keep quiet about this. Not after what he had done the night before. "I have a secret and I'm dying to tell somebody else."

They all seem confused for a moment before Lucas' eyes widen.

"You got Suzie pregnant?"

"What? No!" He makes a face, jokingly punching his friend on the shoulder. "Jesus, Lucas, why would you even think that?"

"If it's not that then what?" Mike sounded annoyed but then again, he kind of always sounded like that.

Dustin wasted no time in pulling out the leatherbound journal he had found the night before, leading his friends to an outcrop near the docks, shadowed by trees. He opened it to the first page, where Steve had scrawled his name in neat calligraphy.

"Is that Steve's diary? Dustin, what the hell?"

"It's from the summer of '85 guys! You know what that means?"

"Uh, that you shouldn't be reading your older brother's teenage thoughts?" Lucas fixed Dustin with a light glare, which he ignored.

"No, idiot. Summer of '85 was the last time Steve ever dated someone! You know, the same year he moved here? When mom took him in?"

"I'm not following. What does this have to do with your wedding?" Mike crossed his arms over his chest, Will peeking over Dustin's shoulder to scan the pages.

"Well, wouldn't it be nice if Steve got to be happy too? He's been taking care of me since my mom died. He's the only family I have and if Suzie and I leave the Villa, who will help him?"

Lucas and Mike don't seem convinced with Dustin's reasoning but at least they stop glaring accusingly at him. In the end, is Will who breaks the staring contest between the three of them.

"So what did you find?"

"Uh, okay so listen to this." Dustin flipped some pages from the journal stopping at a page and grinning.

I keep being surprised when Mama doesn't show up to the important events in my life but I guess I should be used to it now. Robin insists I forget her, Nancy asked if I was planning to go back, and that's when I told them about my plans. Both of them are sad to see me go, we're the Dynamos after all, but they were supportive and saw me off at the airport.

My flight did a stop in France. I met Tommy there when he confused me for one of the staff workers. He's kind of a dick but in a charming way, and he's got this adorable smattering of freckles covering his face. He told me about growing up in London and how his dad was a banker, how his mom had his whole life planned out for him as soon as he graduated from college.

We went out for a few drinks and friendly banter turned into drunk 21 questions. Tommy told me how he's always wanted to but he's never been with another guy before. And look, I'm never like this! But we were pretty drunk, and I was curious if those freckles went all the way down! So one thing led to another and we ...

"I'm not sure if I wanna keep listening to this," Lucas said, making a face.

Mike, on the other hand, took a seat next to Dustin trying to see what was written on the journal. "Well, I do."

"What's dot dot dot?" Will asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"Oh, that's just a euphemism for having sex," Dustin said waving a dismissive hand as he flipped through more pages. "Okay, okay, now listen to this."

After almost missing the ferry, I finally reached Scopello this afternoon. The turqouise waters and the approaching sunset must have been one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen in my life. I think, that maybe I could stay here. Forever. Oh, but I'm not sure, it would mean rarely seeing Robin and Nancy, dropping all dreams of singing in the big stages, all those dreams...

I don't want to worry about this now. This place is too beautiful and I want to make the most of it.

There was a storm the other night. I've been staying on a rundown farm at the edges of town and during the storm heard a loud sound downstairs. There was a horse there, probably scared from the thunder but the ceiling collapsed and I couldn't get to it. I wasn't really thinking when I decided it would be a good idea to try and run back into town to get help. Luckily, this guy had been out driving (who rides out a Camaro in a thunderstorm??) and he helped me get to the horse and calm him down.

His name is William, Billy for short (the guy, not the horse), and I've never met a guy more infuriating than him. Or as hot, either. Good gods, he looks like he walked straight out of an art museum or something.

We’ve spent this whole month together, going out to swim at the beach (he tried teaching me to surf and I almost twisted my ankle on some rocks), then to a local bar (I actually got a new job singing there, who would've thought?), some picnics. It's been awfully romantic despite Billy’s brazenness and cocksure attitude.

And I think that I... I think that I might love him.

"But if they were so into each other, what happened?" Will pipes up again, a frown on his face as he tried to read over Dustin's shoulder with little results.

"I still think you shouldn't be doing this, dude. What if Steve finds out? He's going to be so mad at you!" Lucas interjects, picking another rock from the sand and making it skip over the surface of the water.

"He would kill me for sure," Dustin shrugs, offering a toothy grin. "But only if he finds out."

"Dustin, c'mon! What happened next?" At this point Will looks like he's about to rip the journal out of his friend's hands and read it himself.

"Jesus, you're pushy. Okay, so-"

Billy's engaged. Didn't even tell me, I had to find out for myself while I was making him breakfast and accidentally stumbled over some documents he had left laying around. My chest hurts, and I haven't stopped crying since he left this morning but I'm just so angry!

Fuck, I feel so dumb. This is all my fault. All because I was being a stupid reckless little slut.

Ugh. I sound like my mom. At least Robin and Nancy called to say they would arrive this week. I've truly missed them, can't wait to see them.

The girls came to see me during one of my shifts at the bar where I was singing. Robin couldn't stop laughing at Nancy's surprised face. She thinks I've changed a lot since I left but in a good way. I don't really believe her and I think she knows that. With them here, at least the ache from Billy's departure barely makes itself present.

Oh! Before I forget to write this again, today I saw Jonathan again. He was this nice photographer who slowed the ferry's departure so I wouldn't miss it. We talked a lot on our way and he's such a nice guy. He came to the bar today and we got talking again, he asked if I would be okay with modeling for him tomorrow. Nancy and Robin insisted that I tell him yes, as a chance to try and forget Billy by "getting some".

I told them it's an awful idea but I accepted Jonathan's offer either way. He's quiet but caring, and I really enjoy talking with him. We talked about his family back in America, his mom and his little brother. Honestly, if something were to happen tomorrow, I wouldn't be opposed to it...

"Wait." Will leans back, a confused expression on his face that slowly morphs into astonishment. "Dustin, does Steve ever say the last name of this Jonathan guy?"

"Uh," Dustin frowns, flipping through the pages. "Yeah, they are here somewhere. Let me look for them."

"Will, you don't think-" Mike starts, having caught onto his best friend's train of thought.

"Jonathan took a trip to Italy when I was fifteen." He says simply, biting on the pad of his thumb.

"Oh shit." All eyes turn to Dustin who's got his eyes fixated on the journal in his lap. "Byers. The guys last name is Byers."

"Holy shit Will, your brother hooked up with Dustin's brother." Lucas tries to tamper down his laughter but it's a futile endeavor, his lips curling up before he can control them. "I can't believe this."

"But wait," Mike turns to Dustin who's expression has turned troubled. His eyes narrow. "You still haven't explained what this has to do with your wedding. What did you do?"

Dustin stays quiet for a minute or two before he lifts his gaze to his friend's, a sheepish smile on his lips. "I uh, I invited all three of them to the wedding but made it look like Steve sent the invites. And they uh... they all said yes?"

This time Lucas doesn't even bother hiding his laugh, doubling over as he nearly cackles at the stupidness of this whole situation.

"Dude, you're so fucked when Steve finds out."

[amazingphilza]

study buddies :: cc!multiple x reader

fluff , platonic , gender neutral ! some headcanons if the mcyts were trying to help you do hw :D

cc’s included in order: tommyinnit , tubbo , ranboo , wilbur soot , philza , technoblade

tommyinnit

i feel like he’s the type to be in a long discord call with you whilst you both try to finish your work

mans uses the screensharing feature like there’s no tomorrow

“y/n watch my stream on discord and help me guess the answers”

“tommy no! i haven’t even taken a film class before”

“your guess is good as mine”

“just cheat and google the answers!!!”

“fuck you”

he actually just wants your attention because he’s bored out of his mind doing homework

five minutes later of asking you to help him guess questions he’s like

“hey y/n”

“what now?”

“let’s play bedwars”

“oh my god shut up!!!”

if tommy has to speedrun something before a deadline, it is a whole different story tho; he will be so focused on completing that he won’t hear what you’re saying

if you’re struggling in math, you’re on your own

“math is shit, only numbers i need is my primes and youtube analytics” says tommy any time you complain about math

besides the fact he isn’t good at solving math problems, you can’t even read his handwriting if he did try showing you how to do a problem

“okay, y/n, it’s simple, just look” he says in his kareninnit voice and everything

you’d be like “is the variable a G or a 9??”

“fuck you that’s a 4!!!”

tubbo

i don’t know if tubbo ever talked about school before but something about him makes me think he’s actually pretty good at math

like he can explain a few things when it comes to math / algebra

CODING GO BRRRR

no geometry or calculus though, anything past algebra will go bad

if tubbo is doing homework with you, he will definitely tune you out

“hey tubbo can you help me on this question?”

you don’t get a response until like 20 minutes later

“oh yeah, what was it y/n?”

like now you answer? i just got the answer myself after so long, forget you smh

“oh nothing tubbo, nevermind!”

but you’re still grumbling in your head because if he answered just a bit earlier you wouldn’t have gone through the work of finding the answer online

i can also imagine if you’re taking chemistry tubbo is like ;

“oh you’re taking chemistry? let’s make some bombs!” /lh

tubbo would definitely pull an all-nighter with you to finish your projects together

if you had a group project, he would make you do the writing part while he does the drawing part

“we definitely aced this project”

“of course we did, if i made you draw we would’ve ended up with stick figure diagrams”

“TUBBO. THE FUCK?”

ranboo

okay i know ranboo said he isn’t a theatre or band kid (unless im wrong and forgetful) but i feel like he’d be somewhat educated in the topics nonetheless

half the time he’s great moral support, helping you stay motivated !

the other half is him making fun of you

“i cant believe you’re failing, that is so sad, can’t be me”

“it’s literally an honors class, ranboo! it’s supposed to be hard!!”

“taking an honors class willingly? also cant be me AHAHA”

i honestly can’t see ranboo going to school like i know he’s a minor and said he had zoom calls before and plays volleyball but like did i miss something? has he dropped out yet? like something about ranboo does not scream “student” /lh

besides that, i’m not sure what subject he would actually be good in,,, but something about nutrition/health sciences,, he knows a few things

don’t get me wrong, i don’t think he actually likes the subject but somehow remembers what he learned from the class

also gives me the type of energy of the type of person to take a first aid class to be a certified person to do cpr on someone just to kill time during his lunch breaks for a while or something

“i am a certified cpr person”

“my life in ranboo’s hands? oh god please no”

you two would probably joke about the ‘bad’ people in your classes or talk shit about your schools than actually doing anything homework related ngl AHAHAH

“you think your school is down bad? mine went back to campus full time after like 6 months into quarantine because they were running out of money”

“what the hell y/n? your school is a scam, drop out”

“arghhhh i knowww”

“i bet i make more money than your teachers combined AHAHAH”

wilbur soot

he doesn’t seem like the best person to ask for help for homework but can info dump you on very specific historical events + a bit of geography

i kinda see him as the person you can ask to proof read an essay for you and would help it improve immensely

who needs a thesaurus when you have vocabulary boy wilbur?

i dunno if it’s an american thing only or at all, but if/when you get to studying hamilton in your english class, he will get so fucking excited

“no wilbur it isn’t fun! imagine listening to lin-manuel miranda rap ‘alexander hamilton’ at the white house from like 2009 on repeat for over an hour whilst trying to write an analysis about it!! it was so distracting”

“well clearly someone has a personal problem with mr lin-manuel. if i were you, i’d be singing the whole thing”

is this last bit personal and complete spite from my freshman year english class? yes. i do not care? no. /hj

unrelated but i actually scribbled nice guy ballad lyrics and other songs on my english scratch papers in freshman year but anyway

probably isn’t the best person to be in a call to do homework with but wilbur doesn’t mind you ringing him occasionally sometimes

i dunno i can just see him easily get bored of the silence or something but also doesn’t want to bother you too much

but he is genuinely proud of you whenever you tell him you aced a big test you were studying for :D

philza

this man’s bad advice is as bad as him trying to help you on any subject

he’s an old man so /hj

but like honestly, he hasn’t been at school for so long, phil can probably only help with the most basic things when it comes to school

if you have a wack teacher that makes you collect data through surveying people, phil would be one of the best people to ask! straightforward and won’t take too much of your time compared to other people ahem,,

statistics things ! sobs

if you ever complain a lot about your classes and contemplating dropping out and stuff, he will def scold you hard

“ugh phillllllllll can i just like,, never go to school again?”

“do not drop out”

“argh fine, i won’t just ‘cause philza minecraft said so”

honestly if you get a high score in a big test like your sats/gcse’s (whatever you’re taking from wherever you are) he’d probably order you a small meal or something to celebrate :D

like how phil bought ranboo bought him food to his house, it would start as a joke but when you get your test scores back he’s like “YOOO GOOD JOB Y/N”

expect a left meat pizza coming to your house .

technoblade

like wilbur, techno is also helpful when it comes to history!

def knows a decent bit of literature too

besides that i don’t really see him being that helpful

even if he was supposed to be an english major

he will just get mad at the school system for teaching you useless things

“being in school is good but why do you need to know how to know if something is a triangle or not? i can obviously see with my eyes that it’s a triangle”

“i dunno! ask the person that made up geometry”

“just look at a kaleidoscope and be over with it, it isn’t that hard”

“that isn’t how it works—”

“bruhhh”

if you’re looking for the person to call while doing homework, he is not the person /lh

it’s either like 0 or 100 with techno

he can just completely not say anything and ignore you or go on a full rant about whatever class or homework you have

if you have an essay you need written, it will take a lot of bribing but he might take the opportunity if you are rich

“techno i’ll paypal you $10 please help me”

“no. i can make 10 times that amount in 5 minutes if i just started streaming right now”

“techno i don’t have that kind of money! pleaseee”

“no. instead of complaining, you can use that time to actually start you work”

“you’re the worst”

then you speedrun the essay and get an A just to spite him