#kidnapped spy gagged captive

[givemeuniversalcrossovers]

Mario Sunshine remake/Sequel where its a canonically few years on from the last sunshine game and Bowser Jr is a bit older and a bit bigger and hears that the Mario and Princess are going back to the island on holiday and goes huh, well, I'm bigger. I think I'm gonna get that Mario.

And thus plans to kidnap Princess Peach again to try again because he's gotten bigger he's got a bigger ego big man syndrome but he's not dumb he recruits his siblings too because hey potentially fighting / messing with Mario AND warm holiday fun times. I feel like Wendy would love it like yes relaxation Sun and fun. So they go to cause mayhem, Bowser probably knows they're up to something since they all just leave but eh, they'll holler if they need help they're getting older he trusts they'll be okay, maybe sends Kamek to spy/for updates he doesn't wanna be a helicopter parent but also wants to see how well they do and be ready to leap in and help if necessary. It'll mean that each area likely has a Koopalings boss or two so fun spicing it up from last time with obviously some old bosses thrown in.

They don't realise though that Luigi got sent in advance as bait pretending to be Peach arriving early blacked out plane windows guards with umbrellas to hide the 'princess' from view ect, just in case of a repeat of last time/bowsers shows up so at least if they do cause problems the Princess can be kept out of the way as Mario arrives to fix things. So the Koopalings show up and go to the hotel demanding for the Princess' room, don't question the fact they're given her room number no problem and go and grab 'her' hastily tied up gagged and in a sack or something. Poor Luigi was probably just out/was going in the shower getting dressed/not yet undressed (no nakey weegie here) and the steam obscured the Koopas vision and so he got snagged.

And thus game begins Mario has to go save his brother who was kidnapped, recollecting suns in the process ect like a good person since the Koopalings probably screwed with them too and paint absolutely everywhere with probably color coordination/pattern coordination to each Koopa so you can guess who's in which level like pink hearts for Wendy, crazy multicolor swirls for i believe Larry or iggy whichever the hyperactive one is ect. At some point in the game there's a cutscene of the Koopalings all enjoying the steamy warm flying jacuzzi, some nursing wounds after a beat up from Mario and probably Wendy maybe Roy Roy strikes me as empathetic is like hey it kinda feels unfair to have Peach tied up in a sack in a floating cage while we enjoy the hot water, maybe we should let her out for a bit? And after some debating Jr mentioning that well she didn't want to join him and dad last time they agree cause like they all kinda like momma Peach even if they know she's not really their mom they're more here for fun than malice so it feels right to let her enjoy the warm water and drinks with them. Ludwig waves his wand and the cage floats down and they open it taking off the sack and, "LUIGI???" They're all fucking stunned cause???? The green one??? What?? Where's Peach?? How?? When?? Ludwig did you mess up your magic and swap them??? Promptly starting a major uproar argument between all the siblings over who cocked this up big time. Luigi is just eehhhehe. He's very awkward. At one point one of them is like well I mean sometimes hes there when beating dad this might stall Mario for a bit, plus we can always still get Peach later and that'll be two captives over Mario. This settles them as they murmur agreements and Ludwig magics more drinks which definitely helps ease over the mood, they're probably drinking pg safe coconuts with straws no tropical island drinks here if you get my drift they're probably not old enough to drink alcohol XD. One of them puts Luigi on the floating duck in the middle of the water so he can't escape and puts a drink in his tied hands adjusting the knots so he has enough mobility to lift it to drink from the straw.

Meanwhile Bowser? Absolutely cackling losing his shit laughing at his kids rookie mistake of not questioning the lack of resistance. He loves his kids but he is gonna laugh at the cock up. But he is proud they're doing well despite that but he's on the throne wheezing and has dented his arm rest from banging his fist down in laughing hysteria.

Another cutscene later in the game, Luigi still on the duck drinking coconut drink as Ludwig complains to him about something maybe his siblings not appreciating music as Luigi nods his head understandingly. Every so often there's a cutscene with a Koopaling just kinda talking to Luigi while he floats on his duck it's for character building and just funny imagining him just stuck duck floating around as the kids talk to him. Maybe at one point he's actually in the water floating on his back while Junior floats beside him also on his back like "I just worry ill never surpass my dad you know? Like, I'll always just be Junior. A smaller Bowser. A shadow of my father's glory." and Luigi balancing a coconut drink on his stomach is like "Hmm. I knowa what you mean." just lmao bonding floating about together, "Illa say you're definitely a lotta more scary then you were, youra growing into your own person with your owna style. Working witha your siblings very clever." and Junior scoffs and is like "It's nothing my dad's never done we've always helped him." and Luigi counters, "But, youra helping eacha other, Morton has beena here twice healed up went backa out there, Ludwig hasa boosted Wendy and Lemmy witha magic already fora rematches. Thata will be keepinga Mario on his toes. Workinga with other bosses too, tricky stuff, you have good ideas." just lmao being nice he knows what it's like to be in a shadow and he is kinda terrified and impressed by juniors game plan with the Koopalings being able to swap back recharge swap back in. Plus he doesn't know if the Koopas temper will shift so genuine compliments and peace keeping so he's not drowned.

This game definitely is probably longer and harder with the kids getting stronger and coming back for more but eventually they'll reach their limit unable to go back to fighting. In cutscenes they'll be seen sat out the water or in the water with bandages looking too tired to go back and fight. The end fight is likely with Junior at the jacuzzi his siblings tho tired lend some help making it very difficult but their attacks are infrequent and slow. Maybe Bowser shows up probably right at the end after beating junior but I don't think he'd join the end fight/be a final surprise boss, the kids did a good fight but they've lost and he doesn't think they'd want him jumping in stealing their fight so he shows up as the escape assist and they all escape to dad cause ya know a good future king knows when to retreat. And like you get Luigi back the kids noticeably waving bye to him Junior saying "I'll see you next time Luigi! And I'll get you Mario!!!" as Luigi shyly laughs cause oh no what has he started. Ends happy Peach arrives they all enjoy their holiday, though Luigi absolutely passes out at his hotel room on his bed as he's thoroughly holidayed out. Mario and Peach walk the beach together into the sunset chatting and laughing.

Cut to bowsers Castle of kamek helping heal the kids up while Bowser absolutely lovingly laughs at and bullies his kids for the hotel mix up and junior is very embarrassed before Bowser scoops him into a playful noogie saying "I couldn't be more proud of you!" and Junior just??? "but we failed to get peach??" and Bowser laughs and is like "you think /I/ succeeded the first time I tried?? It went horribly wrong and blew up in my face! You actually kidnapped someone, Mario was terrified and you all planned to raise the stakes if given the chance adapting to the situation. You did really brilliantly." just tells his kids how good of a job they did but also laughs and is like "oh the old wrong hotel room trick" wiping his eye from crying laughing. Let him lovingly rib on his kids XD bullying is a love language.

[likedstories389572]

Whump

Whumper turned Whumpee

Vampire Friend turned Carewhumper x Friend turned Bloodbag

Slave Whumpee

Slave x Royalty

Captured Spy Whumpee

Whumper x Whumpee fluff

Whumperee x Whumpee turned Carewhumper

Human Whumpers x Human Carewhumper x Werewolf Whumpee

Multiple Whumpers x Whumpee

Rescued Pet Whumpee

[jessknightintrouble-blog]

Captives Of The Cartel (4)

Chapter Four: ‘Mighty’ Megan Woods

  The hours went by; two miserable, bound up bodies shrugged and wriggled to get free. Between them, all they managed to move was their heads and fingers; to little or no positive effect. Hannah had fancied herself as an escape artist ever since her previous boyfriend had tied her up one night for a bet they’d made after a few two many glasses of Shiraz. He was no boy scout though, and within minutes she had successfully managed to free herself from his amateurish knots.

 Alas, the experience had given Hannah such a thrill that subsequently, at random intervals, she had tied herself up and tried to get free. She’d ordered all manner of bondage gear from a rather discreet website online and took no shortage of glee from the experimentation. Most times, she managed to free herself very quickly. However, this current situation was somewhat different. As much as she used her tried and tested techniques, as much as she writhed and twisted and turned her hands every which way, she always found tight rope holding them firmly together. There was no slack in the ropes at all and the tight gag filling her mouth made Hannah desperately short of breath almost the whole time.

Hannah looked over at Jordan but she had – for some time – given up the fight to get free and was now merely hunched uncomfortably in her bonds, sobbing uncontrollably. She was a year or so younger than Hannah, and the slightly elder sleuth suspected that Jordan had joined for the romantic side rather than the hard slog. Their current predicament of calculated peril was quite the wake up call.

  Still, Hannah had faith. Megan was still on the outside; she knew the basic whereabouts of both her Agents, and surely next on the agenda would be a call to the police. Even a basic search of the house would be enough to find the young pair of captives. Surely, justice would prevail; and Lady McCrystal and her rotten henchwoman would get their just desserts in jail, and Hannah and Jordan would be freed.

*

  Back at the ‘Woods Detective Agency’ Office in downtown Eschar City, Megan Woods paced the floor, mobile phone in hand. “Why the hell have I not heard anything back from either Hannah or Jordan?” She cursed to herself.

 Megan: the founder of the Agency was a stunning blonde in her early thirties with piercing blue eyes that could usually get answers out of even the most unwilling of sources. She had an attractively svelte and athletic figure which usually was – as was the case today – poured into a fitted business skirt-suit and heels. Her multiple tattoos – she had an uncommon love of animated ‘villainess’ characters – were usually hidden under such formal, day-to-day attire but occasionally, and enticingly, were exposed to the public. She’d formed the ‘Woods Detective Agency’ after a few unhappy years in the Eschar City Police Department, primarily to counter specific crimes against women in the City and its outlying district; issues which she didn’t think were being dealt with by the official authorities. Her maverick techniques – while grabbing some headlines and getting much positive notice from feminist activists - didn’t always sit too well with the (predominantly male) powers that be in the city.

 Megan had a small, close-knit squad, and was beginning to fear the worst for her two missing operatives; her newest recruits. She was savvy enough to realise the worst-case-scenario had happened: both of them had been caught by her nemesis and whatever goons she had working for her. But what the hell was she going to do about it? With what she’d uncovered on the Lady over the years, Megan severely doubted McCrystal would contact the Police. That was most certainly not in her M.O. Her investigations showed that the Lady worked in the grey, shadowy land between the criminal and legal, never too far over the boundaries on either side.

  “I will have to go in myself, and rescue them.” Megan played the scenario out in her head, and kept coming to the same worrying conclusion. “The Police won’t do anything with the evidence I’ve got. Besides, the EPD aren’t exactly best buddies with me and Lady McBitchall still holds a hell of a lot of sway with them. No, I’ve got to go it alone. I had better wait until dark, though. I’ve got that heads-up that she is having a sick soiree tonight with a bunch of dubious business visitors from all over the place. The commotion could make it slightly easier and they may be off their guard a bit. I’m pretty sure I can blag my way in as an uninvited guest.”

  Megan sighed heavily, still looking at her phone, which still wouldn’t humour her. She wished Jenny Masters was still in town; the pair of them together could’ve handled this problem. Meg immediately cursed the thought. When did she become so reliant on Jenny? True, Miss Masters was as good as a partner for her in the agency these days, but Meg rankled at the thought that her friend was establishing herself as the brains of the operation. The trip to Hawaii was Jen’s first vacation for years, and in the two weeks she’d gone, Meg had managed to let things slide, not to mention go too far in her McCrystal investigation and endanger her two youngest agents.

  Still, Jenny was due back in a couple of days, and Meg – however it stung – was very glad of that particular fact.

  She sat down at her cluttered desk amongst screeds of unfiled paperwork and at least three half-drunk cups of coffee. Phone still in hand, she bit the bullet and composed a message to Jenny.

  “Jenny… I know I said I wouldn’t bother you in Hawaii but we’ve got a problem back at the ranch. I think McCrystal has kidnapped Hannah and Jordan. I don’t know what else to do. Going in solo, hopefully see you on the other side. Meg x”

  Megan silently cursed herself again. She eventually closed and locked up the office and went home to change and prepare for the evening.

At least she had the jump on McCrystal with the insider knowledge of this elite party. The files provided by Jenny’s contacts at the clandestine SOLARIS organization had been typically thorough; she knew many of the guests names and their backgrounds. She had no doubt that if she dressed up to the nines, she could get in as a girlfriend of one of the guests. She knew it would be that kind of party; no wives allowed. The kind of debauched scene disgusted Megan almost as much as the thought of Jordan and Hannah held captive in that den of inequity.

  Megan looked at herself in the mirror. She looked tired, true, but she was still pretty. Indeed, she knew that pretty women at these grotesque shindigs would be duly provided for the guests who did not have ‘friends’. Tonight, as much as she hated the idea, Megan Woods would be one of those girls.

*

  At the McCrystal Mansion, preparations were getting underway for the evening’s events. Elliott had moved both Hannah and Jordan upstairs to a seldom-used spare bedroom on the top floor of the West Wing. Formerly, the room used to be the servant's quarters, Sophia mused. Appropriate for these two young beauties. In time, they themselves would make lovely servants. Slaves, even.

  The room had a large, old style mahogany bed with thick wooden ends high off the ground and strong carved legs. As the girls would now be closer together, Elliott tied them back to the bed legs. She smiled as she did so, observing that they looked like wonderful figure heads at the each end of the bed. She used metres and metres of rope around their bodies to almost weld them to the wood. Finally, cruelly, Elliott strung out a length of tape over both of their foreheads and round the wood. They were each joined in uncomfortable silence to the bed, and there was no way they could ever get enough movement to actually move such a monumentally heavy object around and create any unwelcome noise.

  Elliott also knew that the room was remote enough, so that no-one would accidentally stumble upon it whilst the party was in full flow. If any bedroom action was going to happen, and it would,  the guests would use the myriad bedrooms already made up on the lower floors.

  Soon after securing her captives once more, the caterers began arriving, and Sophia went into hyperdrive; rushing and fussing around, making sure everything at the mansion was perfect. In her flurry of activity, she almost bumped into Lady McCrystal rushing down the hall.

  “Careful, Ms. Elliott! You’ll do one of us some damage...”

  “Sorry, Ma’am. It’s just, you know, zero hour.”

  “Quite. But everything is going swimmingly as usual. Just one thing; Are you aware of what Ms. Megan Woods looks like?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  “Mmm. I wasn’t certain either but I have been able to get this from a ‘friend’ in the Eschar Police Force.” Elliott was drawn to an A4 sized sheet of paper the Lady was holding in her right hand. “She has to give her photo in to get an investigators license to use electronic spy tools. Our friend faxed this down, this afternoon. Do keep your eyes peeled for me, there’s a good girl. This meddling vixen is bound to try and get in somehow. And I suspect it will be tonight.”

The Lady passed over the thin slip of paper, which was emblazoned with a fuzzy black and white photograph of what was, despite the lack of quality in the picture, an undeniably sexy woman; blonde, and possibly early-thirties.

  “Very good my Lady. If she shows up, I am certain I will find her. I took the liberty of getting in my friend, Mr. Shields, to keep a close check on the back doors of the West Wing, where that Masters kid got in. I suggested you would be happy to compensate him for his time. I trust this will not cause a problem.”

  “Ah, Ross Shields. A grand idea, Ms. Elliott. No problem at all. Make certain he has some refreshments whilst he is there, but perhaps no alcohol. I do recall an unsavoury incident a couple of years back.” The Lady smiled and made to leave. “Very good, Ms. Elliott. I can see you’re on top form as always.” Lady Clara grinned again and headed off to ready herself for the evening.

  Elliott took another long, lingering look at the picture of Megan Woods to fix that lovely face firmly in her mind, then moved back through to the kitchen. She gave the picture to Shields, who was by now lounging on a chair by the main kitchen table, gurning and joshing with the two young waitresses who were working in there.

  “Whoah, who’s the hottie?” Shields said, admiring the lacklustre photo.

  “Ross, no pissing about. This is serious.” Elliott gripped him firmly by the arm and took him to one side, out of earshot of the workers. “This woman must be caught if she tries to get in, and there’s a good chance that she will, tonight. Not sent back or refused entry, you understand. I want her in and kept safe: out of sight and sound – get the picture? It might not be easy. She’s good. Real good, my Lady says. I know you’re as good as it gets too, when you’re on your game. So don’t mess this up or its shit creek for you. Got it?”

  “Okay Soph. No problem. For the money your Lady is paying I’d lock up my own granny.”

  “Good. And no booze tonight, at least not until later. We don’t want a repeat of the Golf Club incident.”

  Shields held out his hands in front of him and smiled up at Sophia.

  “Clean as a whistle.” He said cheerfully.

*

  Seven Thirty duly arrived at the McCrystal mansion, and sure enough, the guests began to make their way up the driveway.

  Up in their eyrie,  Hannah Masters and Jordan Nerlinger heard little of the gathering and were merely left in their painful cocoons as the sweat trickled down their young bodies. Downstairs, the smart and tuxedo-clad Sophia Elliott was in her element as she greeted and welcomed a constant flow of people in through the front double-doors. Loud, large Texans in expensive suits with glamorous, loud girls hanging giggling on their arms. Some selected girls came along separately and were able to choose their partner for the night from the throng of millionaires and billionaires.

  On the street outside, in a car under the cover of overhanging foliage from the adjacent park, Megan Woods bided her time. She knew the guest of honour would arrive bang on eight o’clock with his entourage, and she hoped to sneak in then with the inevitable rush. Ortega’s crew was generally on a par with a Hip-Hop superstar, and there would no doubt be plenty of cover in amongst the minders, officials, girls and hangers-on.

  Sure enough, As Meg’s digital car clock clicked over to 8.00, a large, silver limousine drew up followed by two Mercedes saloons and headed through the opening gates, stopping just in front of the mansion itself. Quickly, Megan was out and sauntering down the road to mix seamlessly with the small crowd of people extrapolating themselves from the cars. The doors of the limo stayed closed until five large, suited men had got out of both Mercedes’ and fanned out across the pavement, looking intently at all the passers by, some of whom stopped to watch the spectacle.

  Also getting out were four elaborately dressed young women who chattered loudly, giggling to each other as they waited. Megan moved up to stand behind them as the door to the Rolls was eventually opened and out stepped a stocky latino in an expensive, shiny double-breasted suit.

  “Emiliano Ortega.” Megan mused to herself. “And, of course, his extensive entourage.” Two more gorgeous girls – a blonde and a brunette – clambered out of the limo followed by a thin, rather weedy looking man in a pricey but ill-fitting suit who clasped a black leather briefcase tight under his arm.

  Ortega marched up to the double-doors of the McCrystal Mansion, which Sophia Elliott held open in greeting as the gaggle of girls followed, covered by the bodyguards. Megan was glad she had correctly overdressed for the occasion to suitably change her appearance; a slinky tight black Lycra micro dress, black hold-up stockings and four inch black patent heels. She had blown her jet-black wig into a halo around her face with ringlets cascading over her tattooed shoulders.

  Megan went with the flow. As she passed Elliott she giggled, grinned and nodded in greeting, sensing ignoring her would leave her suspicious. For now, Meg’s tried-and-tested bimbo act seemed to be working. Soon enough, the entourage were congregated in the hall as Lady McCrystal, drawing gasps in a spectacular caramel-coloured ballgown, paraded down the stairs to meet Ortega.

  “Mr. Ortega. Welcome to my humble dwelling. I am so glad you accepted my invitation and were able to attend tonight. My home is yours for the evening.”

  “How nice to see you Lady Clara. And looking so utterly radiant.” Ortega spoke not as he looked; but in the strangely clipped accent of the British Public school system with only a hint of his Hispanic roots. “I was truly honoured to receive your invitation, and to be here tonight. I trust you have met my associate, Mr. Morley.” Ortega gestured to the thin man, who bobbed his head in acknowledgement and clutched his briefcase tighter to his arm. Truly, Morley didn’t look the partying type. “Not to mix business with pleasure, but Morley has some papers that we need to run through sometime this evening.”

  “Of course, Sir. That will be duly taken care of. But a surely little pleasure before business?” Lady Clara smiled winningly, her immaculate white teeth in full view. “Come and have a drink first; meet the others and then we can move off to my study to be in peace before dinner. I see, Mr. Ortega, that you have brought some friends as well.” Lady Clara performed a strange, theatrical curtsy on the stairs to the gathered women. “Welcome, Ladies. Come on through to the main rooms of my mansion and enjoy yourselves. Copious drinks await you. Elliott, please do see to my guests. Make sure they are well looked after.”

  “At once, my Lady.” Elliott chirped, the cheeriness sitting somewhat incorrectly with her. “Please follow me, Mr. Ortega. And would you care for your usual aperitif?”

*

  The party moved on, chattering away, to the spectacular, gold hued, high-ceilinged drawing room where the other guests were already enjoying the luxurious hospitality of Lady Clara. Megan followed suit for a while, but eventually dawdled in the corridor to try and sneak away. She was caught by a firm arm around her waist and Lady McCrystal’s voice close at her side. The incognito detective froze on the spot.

  “Come my dear.” The lush voice whispered in her ear, making the hairs on Megan’s neck stand up and take notice. “I shall take you on a guided tour later, and you can see all my treasures. But first, do come and meet the others. I haven’t seen you before. You are…?”

  “Oh... Catriona Archer, my Lady.” Megan recovered quickly. “You do have an extremely beautiful home. I was just admiring that watercolour over there. Sisley, isn’t it?”

  Lady McCrystal smiled, at once admiring the painting and her newfound favourite guest. Megan saw the lust on the Lady’s face, and in her voice, realising it was something she could play on. All she had to do was resist driving a fist into that pretty face.

  “Indeed, my dear.” Lady McCrystal grinned, impressed. “You certainly seem to know your art. Yes, I acquired that piece instead of a business debt just after the Gulf War; the first one, that is. Some of my Arab partners were having understandable trouble with their cash flow and I had always admired it. There are four pieces in all; the others are spread around upstairs. I would be happy to reveal them to you later, if it would please you?”

  “Sure!”

  Skilfully, the Lady steered the smiling Megan into the main, bustling room of the function, after the other guests. Elliott appeared shortly afterwards with a huge silver tray bearing multiple flutes of champagne; and Megan gladly took one and looked around, tentatively as the Lady Clara reluctantly excused herself to wander off to mingle with the retinue. Fortunately, Megan spotted no-one she knew that could feasibly reveal her, but she realised the clock was ticking. She had to get out of the main throb of the party and into the darker reaches of the mansion very soon, to find Hannah and Jordan. In her heart, she knew they had to be here somewhere.

    In the kitchen, Sophia Elliott deposited the now empty silver tray into a dishwasher rack; all the while browbeating various members of the catering staff about ‘speed of service’ and ‘pride and efficiency’.

  Instead of moving back to the drawing room and the main party, she took a detour; heading to the back door of the west wing.

  Looking out the door, she could see that Ross Shields was pacing the back patio, smoking a cigarette but remaining impressively true to his promise of sobriety. He looked elegant in his well-fitted suit, which complemented his lithe but muscled frame. His blonde hair was well-coiffed for the occasion and his trim beard was evidently recently groomed. He nodded as he spotted Elliott coming through the door.

  “Any joy?” Sophia said, slightly red cheeked and with hints of fluster in her words.

  “Nada.”

  Sophia sighed, the stress of the evening starting to show itself on her face.

  “She’ll be here, I know it. Just keep your eyes peeled, okay?” She said.

  “My eyes are peeled, Ms. Elliott.” Shields said, firmly. “Not to say anything out of place, but I think you should be more concerned with what’s going on at your end.”

  “What?! How dare you! I...”

  “The chick in black with the tats and the too-pasty-skin to have jet black hair?”

  “Uh?”

  “Came in with – but not quite with – Ortega’s party? I got a squizz at her on the CCTV unit back there. She’s not kosher, Soph, I can tell. You should definitely trail that one.”

  Sophia relented, closing her eyes as she recalled the girl at the door that Shields was describing. She tried to build a photofit in her mind combining that image and the fuzzy photograph of Megan Woods. A possibility. A definite possibility.

  “I… I will. Thanks Ross.” She said softly, almost drifting back inside towards the escalating noise of chatter and laughter.

  “De Nada...” Shields said smiling, taking another puff of his cigarette and going back to his vigil.

*

  The minutes rolled by in the lavishly furnished drawing room – each one feeling like an eternity for Megan and making her feel more edgy. She was locked in conversation with an idiotic Texan in a beige suit and Stetson who was boasting that everything in Dallas was bigger and better than anywhere else. Whilst trying not to act too bored or to arouse any suspicion, Megan noticed Lady McCrystal and Emiliano Ortega move from the throng towards the door.

  “Now’s my chance.” Megan thought, excusing herself, moving after the dubious pair and leaving the Texan mid-boast. She was so fixed on following the pair quietly out of the room she didn’t notice Elliott watching her from the corner; a concentrated yet puzzled expression forming on her face. Out of the main room of the function and into the hallway corridor, Ortega and McCrystal went left, arm-in-arm in deep conversation, presumably to the study and to go forth with their planned business meeting. Megan saw no-one else around and decided to go for broke. She went the opposite way, at pace, towards the main staircase. Elliott sneered, watching intently from a guarded position in the doorway. The bodyguard crept from the drawing room behind her, and made to follow her upstairs.

[oh-for-fic-sake-library]

A kept woman

Masterlist

Summary: August deserves a reward for all his hard work in the cia. He was on the front lines protecting the national security of the nation, so a little waitress wasnt too much to ask for.. was it?

Warnings: obsessive behaviour, dark!August, kidnapping, spying, swearing, hints at captivity/Stockholm syndrome, hint of bdsm, dark fic.

A/n: well what can i say? I tried to make a drabble below 1000 words, lost track of the wordcount and here we are 😅😅 i hope you enjoy a little ark auggie though~

Free the typos! Not beta read so please ignore the typos.

 

Wordcount: 1445 (nailed it 😅😅)

It was wrong, he shouldnt do it. But he had, and couldnt deny the sense of pride and excitment he had. He was the hero, the white knight who came barreling in to the scene with his polished shoes and 200 horse power to rescue the innocent princess from her fate.

Okay maybe it wasnt that pretty, and there was a chance you didnt feel rescued yet. But you would! He just had to get you home and tie you to something and explain a few things.

August sighed as you tried to scream through your gag again and kicked out at the back of his seat. Though he bearly felt it. One, this was a Bentley;  a good quality car with sturdy padded seats. And two, noone can kick that hard with legs tied at the ankle, knee and thigh... god he hopes ou dont get rope burn, nothing would send him rabid then to see the red rope marks on your supple sking. The indents of a tight binding always made him a sexual savage, salivating at the sight of innocence bareing the twisted marks of rope.

He tried not to think about it. It'd do no good trying to calm his new kitten whilst having a raging hardon. Youd get the wrong impression and think he was going to rape you or somthing stupid. He loved you, he wouldnt hurt you; if anything you should be happy. Ecstatic even! Youd never have to work yourself to exhaustion again. Never worry about bills and rent or that disgusting lowlife youd paired up with. Youd live like a queen, august would give you a better life then anyone else. He wont hit you. He wont con you. He just wants to love you.

"Hush sweet girl, your fine, everything is going to be perfect you'll see. Im rescuing you" he uttered throwing a glance at you only to grunt, eyes locking on the plain soft looking panties that were now on display as your skirt was now tucked around your hips from you squirming. He gripped the steering wheel tighter making the leather creak.

"Oh look at you~ such a naughty little thing hmm? Is this really the time to be teasing me? When your helpless and scared?  bratty? Honestly, you cant even wait until we get home?" He spoke without thinking, smirking and releasing a low growl as he repositioned his rear veiw mirror to drink in your delectable form. Only to shudder as another muffled cry came from your lips, and you wriggled your bottom trying to coax the skirt back over yourself again. the scene made his cock swell. His need for you had become too much.

"Come now little one hush, we are almost home. Everything will be better when we are home" he offered calmly trying to ignor the raor od blood in his ears as his body began toghtening. It was takjng everything in him not to stop the car and scoop you into hos arms and just hold you for a whole. He wanted to ease your panic and sooth you. To comfort you, he never wanted you to fear him. Respect, love and obey. But never fear.

You were the girlfriend... ex girlfriend of a low life with a growing pill habbit. Working all the hours under the sun just to feed your boyfriends habit. Not that you knew that, the scummy bastard ha been telling you the rent was going up. And up. And up. It hadnt, the boyfr;ex had been useing your hard earned money for pills.

But you being the innocent little girl you were trusted him and made sure to up your hours to provide and keep the shitty roof over your head. August had found it strange that you were at the little diner from 5am to 9pm almost everyday. He made sure to leave you bigger tips during his undercover surveillance of the phone box across the road used by the cartel that owned the seedy bar next to it.

He hadnt exactly minded sitting in the diner all day poseing as a accountant sippjng surprisingly decent coffee staring athis 'work laptop'. Especially when he'd done a background search on everyonenin the place. Youd stuck out like a sore thumb, hed expected to see bad grades, high school drop out little slapper with maybe one or two kids and a dead beat husband with a drink problem who refuses to work because of some made up injury he got ten years ago in the forces or some shit.

Instead he found a smart woman whod just had bad luck. Kicked out from her 'god fearing' purity police parents for having an iud. You had excellent grades a degree in business management; which you were pressured into by your god squad parents. But now was stuck in a dead end job, paying off student loans, keeping a roof over your head whislt trying to create a nest egg to pay for a spot on the wall of a local well to do art gallery in the city.  Thats right, his polite little waistress was an artist, a sweet little painter. To say he was surprised you wasnt an aspiring influencer was an understatement.

It was when august saw your so called lover grasping you by the hair and shaking you violently behinde the juke box where he thought no one would see. Thatthe agent had taken more nottice of you. Your whimpers of fear and tiny yelps had moved him.

He'd watched closer, observes the bruises and grazes more carefully and made small talk. He'd sneered at anyone else who aproached him. He only wanted to be served by you. As the weeks went on he couldnt stop thinking about you and your situation. He could help. He needed to help you, protect you! If only youd ask him to. He'd sweep you up and carry you off into the night like a phantom.

He was well aware of his obsession,  but he didnt care. Dreams of you by his side safe and happy. Greeting him at the door after a hards days work with a huge grin and random paint smugdges over your face whislt holding up your latest masterpiece for him to see. He wanted you, he wanted to keep you. You were to precious for him to ignore. You needed him, and he deserved you, after everything he has done for the country he deserved having a little wife waiting at home for him. And so he decided to claim his reward.

He made a studio for you, all the paints and brushes you could ever want! He cleared every single piece of art from his walls to encourage you to paint, he wanted you to fill his home with your art. And live a luxurious life of a kept woman.

August smiled as his home finally came into veiw. A large glass and dark wood monolith perched on a rocky outcrop over looking a large private lake completely claoked in twenty five acres of thick forrest. He had been particular about this place. This was off the record, his retirement plan with everything he could ever want, from gym to sauna, steam room to wine cellar, dungeon and spa, he even had a panic room and mini bunker two levels below ground built into the rock.

"Now now dont fuss, we are home love. Now lets get you settled." He preened as you cried louder when the world became dark as he pulled into the underground garage. August was quick to remote lock the garage, then without further ado he plucked you from the back seat and carried you off into the house.

It would take time before you came arohnd to him again, but once you were settled and had spent a few weeks here in your little studio and realised he will take care of everything and you had absolutely nothing to fret about youd love it. And thats when he can woo you. He estimated in around three months time youd happily follow him into the dungeon for some playtime. Untill then he will just have to be patient with you.

[lailuhhh]

In response to a tag from this post for @bold-and-nosy

🌸 classic kidnapping aesthetic - bound and gagged and frightened

Mac was used to it, as horrible as it was to say. It wasn’t the first time he was kidnapped, far from it, but he could only hope it was the last. He was used to being bound, gagged on a few occasions. The fear that sat in the pit of his stomach had diminished over the years, because he knew that his team would find him.

But that time was different. The amount of fear that had its hold over him was nearly the same as the very first time he was kidnapped. It wasn’t the people that took him, or where he was being stashed, not even the threats they made against him.

Mac was absolutely terrified because Bozer had been taken along with him.

They were on opposite sides of a room, arms and legs firmly bound to the chairs they were sat in, and a gag tied so tight around their mouths that they couldn’t fully shut them.

Mac could handle it, he was a spy, even had training from the army about how to handle being tortured, but Bozer couldn’t. Bozer was still new to everything, still adjusting to the whole spy life style. The thought of having training to deflect torture probably never crossed his mind.

But he was there, sitting across the room, looking at Mac with such an intense and fearful stare that it made a panic start start to form in his gut.

What if he couldn’t get them out? What if the team found them too late? What if they started focusing on Bozer instead of him?

He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if anything happened to him.

So Mac let the kidnappers do whatever they wanted to him. As long as it would keep Bozer safe, he would endure whatever they threw at him.

🌵 manhandling!!!

Bozer would be lying if he said he knew the day would turn out as such. He knew his life was going to change once he learned about Mac’s actual job, he just thought it would take longer than a month into knowing.

He would also be lying if he said he wasn’t terrified. Being kidnapped and restrained in some weird, isolated room was definitely different from the few bullies he had in school.

But he was with Mac. And apparently, Mac was used to being kidnapped and held captive. So that meant he must have already had a plan on how to get them out and he was waiting for the right time.

A day passed, then two, and the third night was just around the corner, and the fear that was set in Bozer’s being had multiplied, because every day, several times, their captors had entered the room and none too gently asked for information, usually by hauling Mac up and dragging him from the room.

And Mac just let them.

He didn’t struggle, or put up a fight, or try to fight back in any way. Every instance when he came back, he was shoved back down into the chair and his bindings look they they were tighter than before, and Bozer could see rough red patches on any bare skin as a result of whatever was happening while he was out of the room, and it horrified him to see his best friend just letting it happen.

But Mac was unfortunately used to that, so maybe it was all part of his big plan.

So Bozer kept quiet every time someone came in the room, even though he was screaming on the inside. If Mac had a plan, he didn’t want to mess it up.

[straight-to-the-pain]

Tagging

Since I started this blog, I've tried to tag my content by trope and type because it's a helpful way of finding content I want to see, and for others, a good way of avoiding content they don't. I've tried to standardise my tags so that they can easily be searched (tumblr permitting).

However, there are inevitably going to be things that slip past me and tropes that I forget to tag. You are welcome to ask me to tag something, and I will tell you if there is a reason why I specifically chose not to.

I will not be tagging gender in whump, just as I wouldn't tag the race or sexuality of my characters, but I will try to tag for gendered or discriminatory violence if it comes up.

I've also chosen not to use the term 'tw' when tagging my content. Any of my tags could be a trigger for someone, and a promise of good whump for someone else. In my own writing, I try to give a brief summary of tropes and content under the header, both to warn and to entice.

I tag explicit sexual content with #nsft and suggestive but not explicit content with #spicy content. My tag for spicy content that's relatable to me personally is #s is a mess and a masochist.

I tag by oc with the tag #oc: [insert name here], my own writing with #my writing, original content with #my stuff, and asks I answer with #asks answered. I also tag posts that I've been tagged in with #tagged for me and my asks answered by other people with #my asks answered. My personal posts tag is #s talks and I tag complimentary asks with #nice stuff. I also try to tag by fandom.

Here is a list of common tags you might find on my blog:

By post type: #tropes and prompts #whump #whump meta #whump community #whumpy lyrics #art #whump art #whump gifs #whump video #whump audio #whump memes #laugh tag (anything funny) #s talks #asks answered #my asks answered #my stuff #my writing #my OCs #ask game #tag game By whump genre: #spy whump #military whump #sci-fi whump #fantasy whump #vampire whump #pet whump #box boy universe #superhero whump #minor whump (for characters under 18) #emotional whump #medical whump

By whump trope: #torture #public torture #captivity #kidnapping #electricity torture #water torture #solitary isolation #restrained #blindfolded #gagged #collared #dehumanisation #intimate whumper #forced to watch #implied/referenced torture #noncon #implied/referenced noncon #drugging #burning #branding #whipping #punishment #failed escape #gore #fingore #hand whump #eye gore #tooth gore #knives #held at knifepoint #held at gunpoint #self sacrifice

#grabbed by the hair

#manhandling

#defiance #needles

By comfort trope: #aftermath of torture #past trauma #painful wound cleaning #recovery #caretaking #comfort #rescue #hospital whump

Others: #alcohol #emeto (vomit) #politics #religion #abuse #child abuse #animal death #death #murder #nsft #spicy content #s is a mess and a masochist #tagged for me

[randomly-a-fan]

‘IT’ has returned once again

Archie was up and had his vegan breakfast... without his dad knowing, and went out to go visit Malon, until his mom stopped him to ask him something. “Archie... I thought maybe it would be nice if you and me both go out for a walk together, just you and I.” Aquarius suggested with a smile. Archie didn’t want to bring his mom to Camp Crystal Lake and her finding out who he’s befriended with. He didn’t want to hurt his mom’s feelings either, so he decided that just for this moment, he decided to go for a walk around town to the park while holding his mom’s hand. “Your dress seems to fit you nicely.” Archie complimented as he noticed his mom wearing the blue floral dress that he and Malon have secretly made for her. “It certainly does, you’ve done a wonderful job; I do have to make minor adjustments on the sleeves, but all in all, you’re brilliant.” Aquarius replied. “That necklace that your father bought for me is just so beautiful... That pearl really looked like your father’s deadlights.” Aquarius added, admiring the necklace that rested between her cleavage perfectly.

A few hours later, Archie thought of trying to go to Camp Crystal Lake again. Secretly, Pennywise lets his son go on his own if he wanted to, since he’s been stopped by his mother in a past few days; the necklace that Pennywise bought for Star is really a gift of love, but what they didn’t know is that the glowing pearl is actually enchanted, it can spy on people like it were Pennywise’s third eye. After Archie left, Pennywise called over to his wife. “Aquarius, my little Starlight... Papawise has a favor to ask you...” Aquarius turned with a smirk. “I thought Papawise was still on vacation at Fiji with T.C...” Aquarius joked. Pennywise chuckled to her joke and gestured her to sit on his lap. “I should’ve suspected that you would make up a joke like that.” Pennywise flirted before he kissed her by the nose. “Actually Love, I wanted you to follow Archie and find out where he’s been going in the past months; only because of me seeing him dirty or minorly scratched had me ol’ Pennywise concerned... Can he help it if he worries about his one and only baby boy that you and I made together... in bed... without the clothing--” “Enough with the speech Penny, I get it. I know you have told me to go spy on him in stealth-mode... I’m just not sure if it’s such a good idea...” Then Aquarius sighed. “I guess it’s for the best... for the safety of our little treasure.” Aquarius said as she walks out to follow her son secretly.

***

Meanwhile at Camp Crystal Lake, Archie found Malon over by the flower field. So he walked over to her and greeted her with a wild flower. “Wild flower for my wild nature loving friend...” Archie said as he took off his hat. Malon giggled. “Hi Archie... It’s been awhile since you came at this hour.” Malon said as she accepted the flower and put it in her hair. “I know I’m sorry. My parents have been paying close attention to me lately and wanted to know what I’ve been up to.” Archie explained. “But I didn’t tell them... So I thought of being absent for a little while and go for a walk with my mom or dad... well mostly mom, since my dad can’t control his hunger.” Archie added. Malon held Archie’s hand while making a fond smile. “I understand, you’re only doing this to protect me... And I like you for that...” Malon said. “Not just you I’m protecting; your family, your animal friends, Camp Crystal Lake... Nothing shall happen to any of you, not while I’m here...” Archie winked.

While Archie and Malon run around the field of flowers, Star has found her son; she was hiding from behind the tree so she wouldn’t be caught. She was so awed by how he has a friend to play with; she wanted her son to have a child to play with. But to her surprise, there was something oddly familiar about the redheaded girl that he’s playing with. 

She was going to approach until she felt a tap on her shoulder, she looked up and noticed Jason standing tall right in front of her. Before Aquarius could do anything, he gagged her and carried her to his and his wife’s cabin. 

MJ was making oatmeal muffins until she heard a muffled voice. “Jason! What are you doing? put her down!” MJ ordered. She recognized the blue-haired clown from awhile back when Pennywise kidnapped her and enslaved her. “I swear, I wasn’t going to do anything to your child I swear!” Aquarius cried. MJ kneeled down and quiet her down. “It’s okay Star, I know you wouldn’t do anything harmful... So uh... What are you doing here in the woods?” MJ asked in a calm tone. “I was being asked by Pennywise to follow our son; he was concerned for his son’s safety and wanted to make sure that he’s not at a dangerous place...” Aquarius explained. Jason didn’t believe her story at all; from all the stories that Archie has told him and his family, he wouldn’t be that insecure for his boy, he felt like that he has a plan up his sleeves... literally. So Jason wrote a note to tell Aquarius to get her boy and leave at this minute. “Jay, I don’t think Star is a threat to us; she was nice to me when I was held captive...” Jason wrote another note to respond to his wife’s statement. ‘If Star was nice to you, why didn’t she help you escape?’ Jason have wrote. MJ tried to think of an answer, but she couldn’t think of anything from the top of her head. So she turned to Aquarius, “I’m afraid that for our daughter’s safety you will have to go...” Then MJ looked up. “...But Jay, do we really have to let Archie go, separate Malon and Archie?” MJ asked. Jason sighed before he answered... with a nod.

*** 

Just as Aquarius was going to pick up her son, Malon and Archie came in with smile on their faces all covered in flowers. But then their smiles faded when they both see Archie’s mom. “Mom!? What are you... How did you... Why?” Before Aquarius could answer her son’s stuttering question, Malon spoke. “Is that the dress that you and I made for her? She’s so beautiful.” Malon complimented. Aquarius nodded with a fond smile, but then she had to cut it short. “Archie... We have to go...” Aquarius said. “Mom, please don’t tell dad about this! He’ll go after Malon for sure.” Archie begged. Then Malon’s mother spoke. “Malon sweetie, we decided to keep you no longer hang out with Archie for quite some time...” MJ said with tears in her eyes, as she never wanted to tell her little girl this.

Malon was shocked, she nearly burst out crying but have to act maturely and not bawl. But when Aquarius took Archie out of the house, Malon unexpectedly of her ran out to go after Archie until Jason caught her and held her back. “Archie...” Malon said with tears. Archie looked back over his and his mother’s arms as he sadly waved back at Malon. Malon had no choice but to cry her head pasted on her dad’s chest while Jason calmly rubs his daughter’s back while rocking back and forth and carrying her inside.

A beautiful day turned into a rainy afternoon, quite an unfortunate coincidence on this terrible sad event.

***

Back at Derry to the Neibolt House, Archie walked in with anger, being greeted by his dad, “How’s that walk of yours, son?” Pennywise was only pretending that he wasn’t aware of anything suspicious just to get into character. Archie walk passed his dad and went into his room and slammed the door. 

Pennywise then turned to his wife. “Hello my Pretty Blue...” Pennywise greeted with a smile. Aquarius blushed by his usual charm and how he smiled at her, so she gave him a normal hello back while hoping that he wouldn’t ask about Archie’s secret whereabouts. But he did, “What has our little demon adventurer been up to all this time?” Pennywise asked. Aquarius needs to try to stretch the truth in order to not put Archie’s friend in danger. “He’s... been wondering about in the woods... such a beautiful woods indeed.” Aquarius answered with a straight smile. Pennywise really does know what Archie has been doing, he’s only testing to see if his wife is very truthful to him. “Did... Archie... by any chance... hang out with somebody... perhaps... my entrée.” Pennywise asked.

Aquarius wanted to leave, but Pennywise is not letting her go, he blocked her path and put her against the wall. “Why is it such a concern to you? I think it’s nice for Archie to have a friend to play with.” Aquarius said as she’s trying to change the subject. “I’m the one asking the questions sweetheart... No need to sugarcoat me... Now answer this question... What’s the name of the woods that Archie goes to... Answer the question!” Pennywise asked a bit more stern as usual. Aquarius sweated. “It’s called... it’s called... Camp Blood!” Aquarius answered. Pennywise just glared and released her from his grasp since he still loves Star very much, and hurting her and scarring her is the last thing he wanted to do on his mind. “Okay... Thank you love... You really are the demon clown I can trust...” Pennywise said as he framed her face and kissed her passionately by the lips. Aquarius was flattered, yet still surprised that Pennywise took it so well and not snap at her.

***

It was a long day and Malon hasn’t been doing much, she was so depressed that she didn’t want to draw or color anymore. Jason even offered Malon ice cream, but she didn’t want any. She couldn’t stop thinking about Archie, so she just goes ahead and get washed up and get ready for bed. 

Jason felt like a terrible father, he pulling Malon and Archie apart, what was he thinking? When MJ entered the room with Jason sitting, looking at his mask sadly, MJ gave him a comforting hug. “I know you didn’t mean to hurt Malon, love... You’re only doing what’s right... I’m sure that things will turn out alright in the end... You’ll see.” MJ assured. Jason kissed MJ by the cheek before he gets out of bed for a perimeter check. 

As the nights got darker, Malon was sleeping soundly until she heard a noise, she thought she have heard little children singing, in the middle of the night? Malon thought she was just hearing things, until she turned and faced up, seeing Pennywise hanging on the ceiling like a spider. Pennywise lightly landed on the foot of her bed and covered her mouth before she screamed out to her mom. “You enjoyed playing with my little boy... don’t you Malon?” Malon tears up as she thinks she’s going to get eaten. “Maybe you’d like to play with my boy again...” Pennywise says as he cast a spell on Malon to make her drift off to sleep. Just as Pennywise was about to leave, he heard a creaking noise. It was MJ holding a frying pan as it were her weapon of choice. “Let her go Pennywise! I’m not afraid of--” at that moment, Pennywise made her look into his deadlights and cause her to float up. “I’d love to float with you MJ my pet... But you’re no longer my concern, just like this sweet red head is no longer yours.” Pennywise chuckled as he escaped through the window.

To Be Continued    

[365days365movies]

March 5, 2021: Arsenic and Old Lace (1944) (Recap: Part Two)

This movie is fuckin’ hilarious, and it’s 77 years old!

The Three Caballeros came out this year, Mount Vesuvius erupted again, the...Holocaust was still happening, fuck, right, World War II. Um...yeah, I’m sure this movie provided some MUCH needed humor for American audiences.

I will say, the play for this film came out in 1941, and was MASSIVELY popular. Apparently, the stage play is just as funny, and I would absolutely love to see it in theatres one day, if it ever comes back. Anyway, the film trailers actually used the popularity of the play to market the film, which was also received very well!

And honestly...I don’t know if I can disagree. We’ll see, I guess! On with the show! Check out Part One of the Recap right here!

Recap (2/2)

So, who’s our mysterious scarred visitor and his friend?

The man strides into the place, calling it his childhood home. Abby and Martha, startled, ask who he is. It’s their long lost nephew Jonathan Brewster (Raymond Massey), and his alcoholic plastic surgeon and accomplice, Dr. Herman Einstein (Peter Lorre). Damn, Peter Lorre’s in this movie? Well, holy shit!

Well, they don’t recognize him because of Einstein’s work. That’s because he looks like Frankenstein, and the good alcoholic doctor may have been that film and had a bit too much to drink during the surgery. They plan on fixing that...in the basement, where Teddy’s still digging “the lock” for the Panama Canal. They also have another problem: a body in their car. Apparently, somebody insulted Jonathan by saying he looked like Boris Karloff. Which, to be fair...

As they’re trying to figure out where to put the body, Einstein becomes aware of the hole in the basement, unaware that it’s being dug for a body. The two plan on bringing their body there...even though there’s already a body that needs to go in there. Jesus, this entire family is FUCKED. Some misadventures lead to Jonathan and Einstein bringing the body in through the window, and into the cellar, next to the aunt’s grandfather’s laboratory. Oh, uh, their grandfather had a laboratory, by the way. This family is FUUUUUUUUUUUCKED.

As Jonathan and Einstein stumble in the darkness, we see them carry a body down to the cellar. But wait...no, they bring him in through the window, right after Einstein falls into the window seat, which is...empty...ohhhhhh. Guess the Panama Canal’s full again. And as these two are trying to get their body in, somebody knocks on the door. And oh fuck, it’s Elaine!

Elaine’s now coming to find Mortimer, or the two aunts. Instead, she runs into these two murderous chuckleheads. She’s aware of Jonathan’s identity from past conversations with the aunts, and his presence seems to explain the strange goings on that day. As they apprehend her, believing her to be dangerous to their enterprises, they kidnap her and bring her into the cellar. Just then, the two aunts come out in funerary grieves, questioning the screaming from downstairs. Elaine escapes from Einstein, only for Mortimer to finally arrive with the sanitarium folks. Dear Lord, that’s a lot.

Jonathan proves his identity by stating their past as children, during which he shoved needles underneath his fingernails in his sleep JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT THE FUCK DID HE SAY THIS FAMILY IS FUCKED

By the way, we are an hour in, and this movie is fuckin’ BUMPING. It’s a LOT, and I love every second of it. Anyway, after much His Girl Friday fast banter from Mortimer, Elaine is absolutely FINISHED. Flabbergasted by Mortimer’s negligence of her near murder by Jonathan, she storms off and renounces their marriage (understandably). Mortimer hasn’t quite caught on, but he now has another concern: to get Teddy committed, he must get a signature by a doctor.

Not sure what to do, he sits on the window seat and thinks. He checks in on Mr. Hoskins...only to find Jonathan’s murder victim there instead! Egads, there’s another one!

He immediately blames the aunts, and talks to Aunt Abby about the body. But she doesn’t recognize him, and calls him an impostor! She refuses to hold the funeral services for a total stranger. He accuses her of lying, and she’s upset that she would accuse him of telling a fib! The nerve! I love this movie. Jonathan, intent to stay at the house permanently, comes down to kick Mortimer out, and Mortimer returns the sentiment. But when the aunts come out to look at the strange body, BOTH of the brothers run to the window seat! Mortimer figures out that the body is Jonathan’s doing, and the look he gives him is goddamn hilarious.

Mortimer now has the leverage he needs to kick Jonathan out, and threatens to call the police on him. And JUST THEN, Officer O’Hara shows up! He’s simply come in to check on the couple, and is about to leave when he realizes that Mortimer is an author, and asks if he’d like to read his screenplay. He agrees, and tells Jonathan that he will keep the cop busy IF Jonathan and the doctor leave with their body.

Jonathan is intent on coming back here, after dumping the body in the harbor. But just before they do that, Einstein finds the body of r. Hoskins in the cellar! Fuck, there goes Mortimer’s advantage. And as negotiations are about to continue between the brothers, O’Hara comes in, only for Mortimer to rush him out. Mortimer goes off himself, warning Jonathan once again to be gone.

Jonathan at first believes Mortimer to be the murder, only to quickly learn that the aunts’ past deeds, to his own actual surprise. This also greatly amuses Einstein, who notes that his aunts’ record is tied with Jonathan’s, in terms of murder. This awakens Jonathan’s competitive nature, and he decides that he needs to kill one more person to beat his aunts once and for all. Meanwhile, Mortimer arrives with Dr. Gilchrist (Chester Clute), just as the aunts are holding their service for Mr. Hoskins. He brings Teddy out to him, and this would appear to settle the matter. He finally goes to Elaine, who’s still quite upset (understandably). And that’s not made worse by the fact that he breaks off their marriage. Why? Well...

That’s actually a great line. And decent rationale, because Mortimer’s come to realize that mental illness runs in his family, and he’s afraid that he may one day be afflicted. But, he can’t resist Elaine, and the two kiss passionately...which is interrupted by Dr. Gilchrist, the new Ambassador of Bolivia (according to Teddy). He agrees to sign the papers, and a frustrated Elaine slams the window on Mortimer’s fingers (understandably).

Mortimer goes back to the house, finding his aunts upset by the fact that Jonathan is burying his victim (a “foreigner”, according to the aunts) in the same grave as Mr. Hoskins, which upsets them greatly. He promises to take care of that, before they go to the police! Downstairs, Jonathan sets his sights on killing Mortimer, and plans on doing it slowly at that! But Einstein’s tired of all of this, and actually tries to get Mortimer to leave, for his OWN safety at this point.

Mortimer’s not listening, despite Einstein’s actually good intentions for once. Instead, Mortimer makes a speech about a play he’d seen about a man in a house full of murderers, who refuses to leave, waiting to be trussed up and gagged. He sits down with his back toward the murderer, but never turns around. And as he mocks the typical protagonist of movies or plays like this...well...he was right.

I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again: I love this movie, and it’s funny as shit. Jonathan’s got Mortimer now, and he’s planning on killing him slow and painfully. Unhappy at seeing the whole affair, Einstein goes through his supply of alcohol. Jonathan forces him to do this procedure, but Einstein can’t possibly do it without a drink! They grab the elderberry wine from before, and JUST as they’re about to take a drink, Teddy interrupts with his bugle, causing them to spill the wine!

And THEN, O’Hara comes back, and sees Mortimer tied up. Einstein fuckin’ nat 20′s on his Bluff check, and tells O’Hara that Mortimer’s simply re-enacting a play for them, and he believes it! Mortimer asks him to untie him...but now he has an actual captive audience, O’Hara instead tells him about his play.

THIS MOVIE IS FUNNY AS SHIT

Mortimer’s listening, unwillingly, and reacting through his gag, and it’s fuckin’ funny as FUCK, dude. Just then, Jonathan is about to kill the cop with a knife, but a fed-up Einstein knocks him out with a shoe! When O’Hara turns around, Einstein tells him that the play put him to sleep, and he AGAIN believes it, and he keeps going on about his play!

Just then, the OTHER cops come by, looking to warn the aunts that the neighbors are tired of the bugling by Teddy. Coincidentally, they find Jonathan there, and arrest him, as he’s VERY wanted. But he retaliates by telling the cops about the bodies in the cellar. As they’re about to go down there, Mortimer tries to stop them from doing so, still tied up. But they never get down there, as O’Hara says that Jonathan looks like Boris Karloff, which starts a fight between him and the three cops present.

Mortimer breaks free, and as the fight takes place, he’s just...he’s just done. He monologues to himself about this crazy-ass day, as the chaotic fight takes place in the background. And, again, FUCK ME IT’S FUNNY

The fight dies down, and Lieutenant Rooney (Jack Gleason) arrives. He reveals that Jonathan’s a wanted man, and also suspends O’Hara for being a dumbass and not reporting in for the entire night. He also berates the men for falling for Jonathan’s story about 13 bodies in the cellar. But just then, Teddy comes downstairs, and seemingly confirms it. However, they also ignore this statement, and Teddy comes willingly with them (believing that he’s going to interrogate Jonathan, a suspected spy.

Rooney goes to speak with Mortimer, and looks over the papers to commit Teddy. However, he signed the papers as Theodore Roosevelt, making them completely useless. AND JUST THEN, Dr. Witherspoon shows up to commit Teddy. Mortimer gets Teddy to sign with his real name, and tells him that Witherspoon is there to take him to Africa (AKA the Happy Dale Asylum).

Upon hearing this, the aunts are quite saddened. Rooney insists that Teddy has to go, though. And so, if Teddy’s going, well...they want to go, too! Mortimer definitely is all for this, but Witherspoon insists that they never take sane people at Happy Dale. Rooney also mocks this idea, and says that Teddy must go because he’s touting the idea that there are 13 bodies in the cellar. Which the aunts, uh...just straight-up admit.

Mortimer, realizing that they’re FUCKED, decides to distract Rooney by making himself appear insane, grabbing Teddy’s bugle and charging up the stairs in a show. Oh, and as this happens, Elaine is watching the WHOLE THING through the window. He manages to convince the men that the women are also in need of admittance, for their delusions. Mortimer also gets Dr. Einstein to sign the papers, just as he’s leaving. Meanwhile, Elaine makes her way into the cellar from the outside.

One more signature needed: next of kin, which is naturally Mortimer. But as Witherspoon leaves for a moment to help Teddy pack his things, Abby and Martha speak with Mortimer, worried about the signatures on the papers. They want to go to Happy Dale, but they’re worried that they’ll investigate the signatures, and find that Mortimer’s is a fraud. And why?

Because Mortimer’s not their next of kin. 

He’s not a Brewster at all.

I fucking love this movie. Anyway, as Mortimer is (understandably) celebrating this discovery, a scream is heard from below as Elaine finds the bodies! She ALMOST blows the whole operation, but Mortimer intercepts her and literally stop her from talking by kissing her OUT OF THE HOUSE

And after that, the two finally reconcile, and they CHAAAAARGE off to their honeymoon. Which, by the way, also drives the cabbie insane. Yeah, dude’s been here the whole movie waiting for them to leave, and I haven’t mentioned it, because this movie is chock-full of jokes, and I legit didn’t have the time!

And, yeah; that’s Arsenic and Old Lace! And I find myself once again saying...I get it, Mom. I get why you like this movie. Hot damn. See you in the Review!

[whumping-every-day]

So we all know that we love the classic kidnapping scenario, with the whumpee waking up somewhere strange and frightening, tied to a char and gagged, maybe with the whumper waiting in a suave dark suit and leather gloves. But you know what thought I’ve really been enjoying lately? 

This exact scenario, except the ‘whumper’ has bitten off more than they can chew. 

Maybe the whumpee is an ex-agent of a top-secret spy agency; when they figure out that their kidnapper is just some random shmuck, they almost kill themselves laughing. Of course they get free soon after, and they are pissed 

Maybe the whumpee is a supernatural creature with unknown powers. The kidnapper seeks to exploit their abilities, but instead of controlling it, the whumpee lashes out in panic and maims or kills the whumper by accident. Are they trapped in their chains and/or in their cell after the whumper is down? Do they starve? Dislocate a wrist or shoulder in order to get free? 

Maybe the whumpee is innocent, but they’ve always had a strange relationship with pain. Maybe the first time their kidnapper cuts them, slices into their flesh and watches them scream, the whumpee discovers something about themselves. Maybe they laugh themselves sick, even as the whumper slices deeper, and eventually it’s the whumper who leaves the room with a falter in their gate and a tremor in their hands. 

I don’t know how it happens, but just imagine any kidnapping or captivity scenario where the whumper has royally fucked up 

[timeagainreviews]

Spyfall aka Ryan and Yaz get into VOR

As our first sample of series twelve, "Spyfall," offers up a lot to talk about. Through a series of misdirects and intrigue leading to a big reveal, it certainly fits the spy genre. However, I should preface this by saying I've never seen a single James Bond film. Don't expect me to get minor references because I won't have caught them. What I do know is Doctor Who, and by golly does it feel good to be writing about new Doctor Who.

Earlier today I accidentally read the synopsis to tonight's episode. I say accidentally because I have purposely been avoiding plot synopses. I was a bit annoyed as it ruins the entire opening sequence of spies getting kidnapped by aliens. I was left with zero levels of intrigue or mystery during the opener as I knew exactly what was happening. However, as I said, this is an episode of misdirection. For better or worse, the kidnapping of spies turns out virtually inconsequential by the end.

I was a little disappointed when I discovered the companions were only visiting their loved ones, jobs, and other doctors because of a pit stop. One of the things I liked about Moffat's era was that the Doctor came and went. Steven Moffat called these "Big Finish gaps," where writers could squeeze in new companions and adventures. They do use this time to give some glimpses into Ryan, Yaz, and Graham's personal lives. Yaz is about to get fired, Ryan's friends miss him, and Graham is 'travelling.' Meanwhile, the Doctor goes in for her MOT. The visual of the Doctor sorting out the TARDIS on a hydraulic lift is a cute sight gag that reminded me a bit of Matt Smith's tinkering under his TARDIS console. However, it always confuses me when they break the barrier of the chameleon circuit a little bit. Like the fact that the TARDIS would need to be painted, or have its lightbulb changed is a bit perplexing.

Our friends find themselves rounded up by a couple of spies in a dark government vehicle. However their captivity is drawn short as the dashboard vaporises the driver leaving the crew helpless as the car reverses down the motorway by some invisible hand. The Doctor manages to gain control of the vehicle just on the brink of disaster. It seems that Chibnall's newfound love for speeding car chases on New Years day has now been established. It was frankly, rather thrilling.

Over the car's satnav, a man by the named of "C," invites them to MI-6 to ask the Doctor for help. Enter national treasure Stephen Fry. I feel like Juno Dawson should have gotten a cheque from this episode as the whole mistaking Graham for the Doctor because the Doctor has always been a man was the entire premise to her book "The Good Doctor." If you're looking for a fun Doctor Who read, it's a cracker! Also, yay for trans artists!

As soon as we meet C, there he goes... lasered. There is sadly very little of his character, so when he dies, it's not so much the character's death that's shocking, it's the fact that they wasted Stephen Fry that is shocking, which seems cheap. I'm really hoping that they bring him back somehow in part two, because if not, I am a disappoint.

Mr C, as I'm calling him due to the various Twin Peaks themes throughout this episode, shows the Doctor to a woman being kept as a patient. It's one of the spies from the opening sequence, only her DNA has been rewritten, and Mr C wants to know why. After enlisting the help of the Doctor we're treated to a bit of spy paraphernalia for Graham and Ryan to go nuts over. Every spy that had gone missing was investigating a man named Daniel Barton, who runs a search engine called VOR.

Okay, so I will give Chris Chibnall credit that he's trying to be more hip, but this is just an unfortunate name. How are we supposed to believe the people making Doctor Who are hip to their audience if they've never heard of vore before? It's like they don't even look at Tumblr. Which would mean I'm not actually speaking to Chris Chibnall directly. Which also means that bridge troll lied to me. Seriously though, is there not one dakimakura cuddling, partial fursuit-wearing, giantess worshipping weirdo working on Doctor Who? Not that there's anything wrong with weirdos, I am one of those. For myself and other weirdos, every time they said something like "VOR has infiltrated every corner of the internet," it was so much unintended laughter. I honestly had a hard time following the plot in places because I was laughing so much.

After Mr C is assassinated, the walls of his office turn into bad guys looking like chameleons or Voord in scramble suits. I couldn't help but wonder if VOR wasn't actually a nod to the Voord being the baddies. They very well still could be, but that's a bit of a stretch. Would be an awesome way to reinvent them though. The Doctor and Fam find refuge in the TARDIS where the Doctor decides to split the team-up. Yaz and Ryan will pose as journalists and Graham and the Doctor are going to see her WhatsApp buddy. Much to everyone's surprise, one of the chameleon creatures begins working its way through the TARDIS door, causing the Doctor to dematerialise ahead of schedule.

The Doctor's WhatsApp buddy is left a mystery. Initially he sends her a picture of a fish which I thought was going to be a one-off Chibnall joke about how the Doctor is friends with a fish, or perhaps that they were currently underwater. But the image is actually a coded file that leads the Doctor to this mysterious person's location, which is Australia, and definitely not underwater. I was expecting all of this mystique to lead to some big reveal, but instead, we get some guy named O. As in "Oh, it's nobody special." I saw that black hair behind and I was hopeful that it was Captain Jack. If Chibnall purposely built this up to be disappointing all so he could land the big reveal later, then my hat is off to him.

The problem is, up until that reveal, O is boring as wallpaper. In discussing the episode with my friend, I had mentioned that it was like the Asgard scenes in "Thor: Ragnarok," in that they're the worst scenes in the movie, and every time we're there, we'd rather be somewhere more interesting, like with Yaz and Ryan in San Fransisco. Oh hey, there they are now! After finding their way into Barton's office, Yaz plays a reporter and Ryan acts as her photographer. All the while they're scanning his DNA to discover if he's an alien threat or not. The interview acts more as a means to dispense exposition. I get that she's not a real journalist, but if you're talking to Bill Gates you're not going to ask him to describe his company like he's some scrappy tech start-up. Just as the interview starts to get spicy with Yaz calling attention to social media being safe havens for hate speech, the interview gets cut short. As an apology, Barton invites them to his birthday party the next day, because that's a thing people do. How very convenient.

Even more convenient is that nobody was there to escort Ryan and Yaz out of the building. My wife used to work for a tech company in the states where I visited her for lunch a couple of times. The amount of security I had to go through just to have a bit of pizza with the missus makes VOR seem tame. Heh. The duo sneaks into Barton's office where they have a conversation that proves once and for all that Chibnall is very hip with the kids when Yaz informs Ryan that her sister wants his phone number. What's she gonna do, call him from her rotary phone from the old folks home? Seriously girl, slide into them DMs, look up his damn Insta or Snapchat. At least the Doctor uses WhatsApp.

Lots of tropes follow. They need to copy information from Barton's computer. Barton returns to his office. Ryan and Yaz have to hide. Barton even does the whole "I know you're there," but he's actually speaking to someone else trope. The “someone else,” are the wall chameleon Voord dudes who seem to be covered in bright light. He seems to control them or answer to them on some level. After Barton and the two chameleon bois leave, Yaz goes back to the computer to get more information but is stopped by a third chameleon dude. He zaps her into oblivion and Ryan runs away only to find the building lighting up with chameleon bois in the windows like Cybermen waking from a tomb. Actually I'm not discounting that they could be Cybermen.

Meanwhile, in Australia, the Doctor and Graham have possibly brought chameleon bois with them like interdimensional bed bugs. O's small cabin is under attack until some crafty use of force fields on O's behalf manages to trap one of these baddies glowing as bright as floodlights. The Doctor questions the trapped creature who informs her that it and the rest of its kind plan to take over the universe. Finally, some high stakes in Chris Chibnall's Doctor Who!

During all of this, Yaz finds herself alone in an unfamiliar place that looks like a neural network of sorts. Impulses of energy spark around her feet and up long tendrils reaching up into darkness. A lot of this reminded me of Twin Peaks: The Return. From the desert outside O's home, to the creatures travelling through electricity, to a hero appearing suddenly in a glass box that also houses a monster. It would not surprise me if many of the production crew at Doctor Who weren't also giant fans of Twin Peaks because its hoof prints are everywhere. I'll forgive them then for not knowing what vore was.

As I said, a hero appears in the box. Just as the Doctor is talking to the creature in the box, Yaz is overtaken by the electrical pulses and is transported to Australia, switching places with the creature in the box. During a bit of downtime, Yaz sulks a bit from thinking she was dead. Graham and O discuss the Doctor long enough for Graham to discover she wasn't lying about being a man before. As a trans person, I've seen that face Graham made and it's pretty accurate. Props to Bradley Walsh for capturing trans panic with such realism! According to the DNA scan, they discover Barton is only 93% human, which sounds an awful lot like the woman in a coma at MI-6. They also discover a strange code imbedded in VOR’s system. Strangely it makes a map of the earth, but not just one map, several maps of the same earth. I’m thinking it probably has to do with different points in time. After rounding everyone up, including O, the Doctor forms a plan to infiltrate Barton's party and confront him.

Perhaps at this point, the biggest shock about Barton's party is how much of it actually plays out. So many things have happened up to this point that I figured the episode would be ending soon. The Doctor and her fam show up in full tuxes. Even O has spiffed up. We get to watch Graham and Ryan bond a bit over gambling and the Doctor attempts to play poker, but just ends up playing snap instead. However, her actual plan is pretty weak. She literally walks up to Barton and confronts him. That's the whole of her plan. Step one: Get lucky enough to be invited to Barton's birthday party. Step two: Confront Barton directly. Step three: No, that was it.

Barton, of course, flees giving us a chance for yet another car chase. This time there are motorcycles and guns! Though the guns are a bit rubbish as they can't hit anything but bulletproof motorcycle headlamps. This sounds nitpicky, which it is. I was having a lot of fun at this point in the episode. Lenny Henry was clearly having fun as Daniel Barton, firing wildly at our heroes from a speeding car. The chase leads us all the way to the airport where our heroes pile into the back of Barton's getaway plane.

What happens next is basically all over the internet at this point. People are going crazy for the return of the Master. It would appear that our gentle natured O is actually Missy regenerated into a new body. Sacha Dhawan plays the role with great relish, and none too soon! I was beginning to feel bored to tears by O. It was also by this point that I had a bit of a revelation, as up until O started to show an attraction toward Yaz, I was pinging the dude as a friend of Dorothy. And speaking of Dorothy, how about that flying house out the window reference with the Master's TARDIS?

A lot of this episode hit a lot of Third Doctor notes for me. The glowing villains were like something from "Ambassadors of Death." And how gnarly was the return of tissue compression as a means of killing? Looking at mini-agent O in that matchbox is as ghoulish as it was when Delgado was the Master. Another great thing is that the Master is once again being used to pave the way for future Doctors. As we got Missy, we ended up with a female Doctor. And as we now have a person of colour playing the Master, perhaps then we will get a person of colour playing the Fourteenth Doctor.

This is not to say that I was 100% onboard with this new Master. While I do think Dhawan seems to do well with his five minutes of screen time as the Master, I'm feeling a bit of big reveal fatigue from literally every Master since Yana. It's the same creeping realisation as it slowly dons on the Doctor that the person standing in front of them is indeed the Master. We're supposed to swoon with excitement while the Doctor and Master stand there eye-fucking each other. Hell, they even did it with Capaldi and baby Davros. I'm putting a moratorium on the big Master reveal. You don't get to keep doing the same story and expect a pat on the head. The next Master needs to regenerate in front of the Doctor or something because this is getting old.

The real excitement from the scene comes from the potential of yet another actor in the shoes of our favourite psychopath. I'll always be open to seeing what a new person can bring to the role. And my what an exit he has! After revealing his true nature to the Doctor, our new Master leaves our heroes with a bomb on board the plane. His parting words of "Everything you think you know is a lie," sounds a lot like retconning to me. My guess is that it has to do with Chibnall's "timeless child," storyline. It's pure conjecture on my part, but there's a slim chance it's going to point toward the Doctor being some sort of orphan the Time Lords found. There are echoes of Andrew Cartmel's "The Other," storyline. The reason I think this is that such a storyline would inject mystery back into the Doctor's character. Adding a little more of the "Who?" to Doctor Who.

Things at this point are happening in rapid succession. I don't quite know what happened to Barton other than he turned into a cockpit bomb. Perhaps that was the other 7% of his DNA. His mother's father's father was a bomb from a long line of bombs. The truth is probably closer to the 7% being part chameleon boi. If you’ll remember, the DNA scan only said 93% human, and never said what the remainder was. This could be because the species is unknown, or it could also be because, like with the sonic screwdriver, it was unscannable. Before the Doctor can come up with a brilliant escape, she suddenly finds herself in the same strange dimension where Yaz had found herself. As that all too familiar stab indicating the end of the episode swells, I was left relieved I would only have to wait until Sunday to see the conclusion to Spyfall.

How exciting is it to be excited for Doctor Who again? As much as I loved parts of series eleven, I went into each episode with a slight pang of dread that I wouldn't enjoy myself. In fact, when I saw the words "Part I," and "by Chris Chibnall," at the beginning, I started to dread the outcome. A lot of my trepidation is still a remnant from Moffat's lesser qualities. I'm tired in a lot of ways, of big reveals and cryptic soundbites that oftentimes lead to disappointment. I even got some of the things I’ve been wanting to see. I got to see Jodie be tough with Barton. They stopped using those god awful ugly closeup shots. And we got to see some variation in the Doctor’s costume. On top of all of that, I admired the fact that the Doctor wasn’t able to sonic screwdriver away her problems. (Though I would say psychic paper would have been a more believable way into the party). While I don't feel we're out of the woods just yet, the promise inherent in this most recent episode has me feeling optimistic. I had a lot of fun.

[pagesofkenna]

Direct Mayhem: Dragon Heist. Chapter 14

“No, see - I was lying.”

Carlin, the gnome rogue in our party, has finally found his kidnapped brother Carlos, tied up and gagged halfway up the Kolot Towers. He’s being guarded by two Zhentarim, a half-orc woman and a half-elf man, who look just as frightened by the newcomers as their captive.

Sadi, the tabaxi monk, goes to attack the Zhents but is stopped by Carlin, who instead diplomatically argues for a truce. He promises not to kill the pair if they let him and his brother go. They’re hesitant, because they’ll be killed if it’s discovered they freed their captive. But they agree that they don’t want to fight - they don’t even want to be here, they say. They only joined the Zhentarim because they had nowhere else to go, and now they’re trapped.

Devin, the human (but probably not human??) warlock, joins his companions along with their ally Esvele, and gives the pair of Zhents 100 gold - enough to buy safe passage out of the city, and away from the Zhentarim base. They take it, and everyone leaves the Towers, unwilling to climb higher and face the lieutenants above.

Esvele drops the party, plus Carlos, off at Carlin’s family shop, and agrees to meet them later at their manor. Carlos tells Carlin as much as he can before they meet with their family: that he was mistaken for Carlin, kidnapped for some issue involving the Xanathar guild, and that they threatened to cut off his thumbs. The family has a dramatic and tearful reunion, and Carlin tells them as much of the truth as he can, leaving out the mistaken identity case. He tells his family about the search for the Stone of Golorr, and how the Zhentarim are also looking for it.

Everyone’s worried about the safety of Carlin’s family - if they were willing to kidnap his brother just to stop Carlin helping find the stone, what will they do with the rest? They agree to take the gnomes to the Yawning Portal inn, where they have a meeting that evening anyways. They’ll stay there for a few days, at a discounted price because of Devin’s friend Bonnie who works there.

They say hello to Bonnie at the inn, then Devin stops to get a cup of tea at the bar. While he’s drinking it, a woman nearby calls to him in recognition: she’s about middle-aged, with the battlescars of an ex-adventurer, and she exclaims in surprise that she thought Devin died ten years ago in a dungeon.

It turns out this is an old companion of Devin’s, who used to work guarding trade caravans on the road with him. About fifteen years ago, apparently, which confuses Sadi and Carlin, because Devin’s only about in his mid-twenties. The woman, named Nele, is amazed to see him alive, and with magic no less. She chats with the trio while Sadi and Carlin dig valuable information out of her - like how Devin used to be a bit of a troublemaker. They agree to meet up again that evening, after the party’s Harper mission.

On the way home Carlin buys a red scarf, and Sadi attempts to apologize to Devin for prying so much into his life. He’s visibly upset about something, and drinking heavily in their as-yet-unopened downstairs tavern. He eventually confesses to her that he isn’t the Devin Nele knew. He doesn’t know anything about that Devin - he met the guy once, and decided to use his face as his primary appearance. Sadi already knows he can change his appearance, but he tells her she’s never seen his true face. He doesn’t want to show it to her, because of some bad experiences he had as a child.

Carlin thinks to ask, if he isn’t Devin, what his real name is, and he finally confesses that his name is Tariq. In fact, it’s the name he wrote on the deed to their manor, when it was gifted to them. Tariq tells them they can continue calling him Devin if they wish, and asks for their help in speaking with Nele tonight. He wants them to ask questions, so he can find out more about the original Devin - who Tariq assumes actually did die in that dungeon ten years ago.

They have a few hours to kill, so Devin sobers up, and Sadi and Carlin run down the street to Rishaal’s bookstore to find a book about Doppelgangers. Rishaal finds them one book on Monstrosities and Sadi reads up. She discovers that as well as being able to change their appearances, Doppelgangers can read the surface thoughts of those they interact with.

She tests this out with Tariq/Devin, and finds out he can’t do that.

At 5, they head to the Yawning Portal again. Carlin spots an old friend of his, who he knows works for the Zhentarim, and Sadi spots Tariq’s friend Bonnie - sitting with their Harper contact, who was supposed to be introducing them to their doppelganger recruits tonight.

It turns out Bonnie is the head of this doppelganger ‘family’. The other four, sitting inconspicuously nearly in various humanoid disguises, followed her out of the Undermountain about two years back. Bonnie tells ‘Devin’ that she’s been anxious about them getting into trouble, and hopes that them joining the Harpers will give them something productive to do with their abilities.

The trio interviews the doppelgangers and finds Bonnie to be trustworthy, while two of the others seem itching to join Xanathar, one is just really dying to leave the city, and the last harmlessly follows along with whatever Bonnie says. The party passes this information on to their Harper contact, and Devin suggests they send the wanderlusting doppelganger with Nele back to Neverwinter. Sadi gets hopelessly drunk.

They speak to Nele afterward and find out more about the original Devin - he apparently wasn’t the type to settle down, he used to use a greatsword, he was very good at holding his liquor. There’s another old friend of Devin’s who frequents a bar up in the Sea Ward, and Tariq carefully notes never to visit that bar. He then introduces the doppelganger to her, and she agrees to accompany him to Neverwinter the following day.

On the way out, Carlin’s Zhentarim contact Davil Starsong calls him over, asking for a chance to apologize. He explains to Carlin that there is a rift in the Zhentarim at the moment - a ‘new guy’ has entered the scene and taken over, and not all the Zhents are happy about it. Apparently, a lot of the bad stuff that’s been happening recently has been because of him.

Davin tells Carlin that he isn’t hoping for forgiveness, just that he wanted to apologize, because kidnapped and threatening to kill innocent kids has never bee part of the Zhentarim playbook. His faction of the Zhents isn’t strong enough to openly oppose this new player, and it’s not like they can go to the city watch, but if he finds out anything more about what’s going on, he’ll pass the news on.

Tariq, meanwhile, takes Bonnie outside to ask her how much she knew about his secret. He realizes she can read minds now, and she immediately confesses to having known the whole time - it’s actually why she trusted him to help her find her job years ago. She explains to Tariq that while she knows what he can do, she doesn’t fully understand what he is. He’s not a doppelganger; he’s bound by rules she isn’t, and he can’t read minds. She doesn’t know what he is exactly, and Tariq can only suspect he must be some sort of off-shoot from a doppelganger.

She goes further to explain that she had been summoned by some evil magic into the Undermountain - she wasn’t originally from there. In fact, as far as she can tell, she wasn’t originally from this plane of existence. The mad mage in the Undermountain summoned her and the other doppelgangers from various existences, and they formed their ‘family’ as a way to escape. Where she lived before, she says, there were more doppelgangers, and if she ever could she would love to go back.

Carlin writes to Mirt the Moneylender, asking if there’s any way the Harpers could help protect his family, and then to the Blackstaff, telling her what she knows about the Zhents. Then they pick the drunken Sadi off the tavern floor and head home.

They run into a familiar face on the way home: Vincent Trench, their neighbor the detective. He’s outside a festhall (which is just a fancy kind of brothel), apparently spying on a man for a client of his. The group gets to chatting and Tariq offers to go into the festhall for Vincent, to see exactly what the mark is doing inside. Vincent accepts the offer, and Tariq and Carlin head inside. Sadi hangs out with Vincent outside, singing and stage-whispering.

Carlin spots the mark right away, eating and watching the dancing. They keep an eye on him for a while and discover that he never accompanies anyone upstairs, just chats with another customer then leaves. Vincent pays the cover charge for their troubles, and stalks off to follow his mark.

It’s about 8:30 and Carlin and Sadi go to bed, but Tariq heads over to Rishaal’s bookstore. The store is closed but Rishaal is still inside, having lost track of time reading a book, and allows ‘Devin’ to peruse his wares looking for a book on exotic, rare, shapechanging humanoids.

There isn’t much, though Rishaal promises to keep looking. Tariq does buy a book on extra-planar worlds though, which goes into some detail on the people and cultures of the inner and outer planes, as well as other worlds outside of the understood planar system.

The next morning, the trio meet again to decide what to do. They have to find a ‘devil’s claw’, which Tariq believes he can get at the Cassalanter Villa. He tells the others that’s where he almost died years ago, when a team of burglars he was helping break into the villa was slaughtered by the imps and spine devils within.

They’re not exactly sure how to break into the Villa, though, so the party opts for a simpler options - buying a devil’s claw from a trader. And they know just who to go to.

Days ago they had saved an old man’s life after someone - who they later found out were Zhentarim - beat him in his shop. He recognizes ‘Devin’ and promises him one free item in the shop as reward, though sadly admits that he doesn’t stock any monster parts.

Tariq does a detect magic to discover that many things in the shop are fakes, and tells the old man which is which. He ends up picking a Wand of the War Mage as his free object, and lies to him about a Staff of Striking which Sadi has her eye on. The new price is still a bit too expensive for her, so she agrees to buy it on credit.

Newly equipped and with some various emotional baggage dealt with, the party is now ready to go find the last two keys needed to enter the Vault of Dragons

[thedcdunce]

Nemesis

“Someone's making a mistake.” - Nemesis

Real Name: Thomas Andrew Tresser

Gender: Male

Height: 5′ 10″

Weight: 170 lbs (77 kg)

Eyes: Blue

Hair: Blonde

Abilities:

Disguise

Hand-to-Hand Combat (Advanced)

Equipment:

Nemesis Mask System

Universe: 

Earth-One

New Earth

Parents: Chet Tresser; father

Citizenship: American

Marital Status: Single

Occupation: 

Government Agent

Spy

Inventor

First Appearance: Brave and the Bold #166 (September, 1980)

Abilities

Disguise: Able to develop lifelike masks used to impersonate others.

Hand-to-Hand Combat (Advanced)

Equipment

Nemesis Mask System: Nemesis utilized a mask disguise system that could be quickly dissolved with a special chemical spray from a collar device.

History

Tom Tresser, a.k.a. Nemesis, is a vigilante, turned operative for the U.S. government and a master of disguise. His default costume is a black turtleneck sweater with a balance as a chest symbol and a chest holster.

The Council

He was an applicant to an unnamed government agency. His brother Craig was an undercover agent infiltrating a criminal syndicate called the Council. Craig was brainwashed into killing their family friend Ben Marshall and was subsequently killed in self-defense by fellow agents. Tom thus became the Nemesis, preferring to use an alias instead of his dishonored family name. With the assistance of Batman, he cleared his brother's name and saw the men responsible for his brother's murder dead.

Nemesis is believed to have sacrificed himself, and died in the helicopter crash that killed the Council's leader. It is later revealed that he freed himself at the last second and fell into the river, horribly injured by the explosion. His body was found by federal men, who took him to a hospital. The U.S. government paid his hospital bills, and he was offered a position on Task Force X. This would allow him to pay his debts, and operate on a global scale.

Suicide Squad

Nemesis is recruited by Amanda Waller to work undercover for the Suicide Squad. His first mission is infiltrating the terrorist group Jihad in Qurac by impersonating the terrorist Mushtaq. This is revealed when Plastique tries to sell the team out to Mushtaq, and Nemesis knocks her out. When Belle Reve is attacked by the Female Furies of Apokolips, Nemesis tries to fight Lashina with a machine gun and is easily defeated. They are sent to release imprisoned writer Zoya Trigorin in the Soviet Union, and Nemesis goes undercover in a psychiatric hospital. The team is discovered and Nemesis leads them out while fighting the Soviet army. He is trapped with Nightshade inside a train car, and he admits that he has feelings for her, but she has feelings for Rick Flag. Nemesis offers to stay behind and cover their escape, then says he's quitting the team anyway because he does not want to work with criminals. This fails and he is forced to escort Zoya to their helicopter. Zoya is gunned down by enemy fire, and Nemesis is arrested by the Russian army while holding her in his arms.

He is held captive in a Russian prison, where they intend to execute him. Batman learns of this and tries to have Justice League International rescue Nemesis, but they refuse to anger Russia. Rick Flag disobeys Waller and launches an unauthorized rescue mission to save Nemesis. Waller learns of this, and has President Reagan send the JLI to stop them. The JLI intend to keep Nemesis imprisoned, and both teams battle. They decide to work together when Rocket Red talks to Nemesis and realizes he is being falsely executed. Nemesis is taken to a Justice League Embassy for "questioning" where he can escape their custody after several days.

He later returned only to help retrieve the kidnapped Flag's son and to assist in trying to uncover a secret government cabal.

Shadow Fighters

Nemesis was drafted into the Shadow Fighters, in an attempt to battle the villain Eclipso. He was originally the sole survivor of the Eclipso massacre that claimed lives of the rest of the team. He continued the fight against Eclipso in a smaller recon-team that also included Nightshade and the matter-manipulator Chunk. Nemesis and Chunk were saved from a nuclear bomb attack by Nightshade's powers.

After his involvement with the Suicide Squad and The Shadow Fighters ended, he apparently met his end -again- while he was allied with Catwoman. In fact, Nemesis was alive and well, impersonating Sarge Steel and apparently working for a shadowy Cabal.

One Year Later

Nemesis was seen again One Year Later after the events of Infinite Crisis, aiding government agent Diana Prince, Wonder Woman in disguise, in the rescue of Donna Troy from several of the Amazon's villains. Nemesis was part of the newly re-opened Department of Metahuman Affairs under Sarge Steel. Around this time, Nemesis assisted in saving the life of the second Maxi-Man. Shortly before the events of Amazons Attack, Nemesis questioned the detainment of Wonder Woman by the D.M.A. and went against orders to rescue her, after brutally beating, tying up, and gagging several of his fellow agents. He soon uncovered a plot by the villain Circe to trick the U.S. government into destroying Themyscira under false pretenses. During the Amazon counterattack, he was stung by several gigantic Stygian Killer Hornets, native to the Amazon Nation. Wonder Woman risked her life by traveling to Themyscira for an antidote and healed Nemesis. Shortly thereafter, Wonder Woman began courting Tresser, in the traditional Amazonian manner.

This courtship ended when Genocide used Tom as a hostage and forced Wonder Woman to tell him the truth about their relationship, that although the courtship was real, she did not love him. Tom broke off the relationship as a result.

[jessknightintrouble-blog]

Captives Of The Cartel (2)

Chapter Two: The Interrogation of Hannah Masters

  Despite the dreadful predicament her latest assignment had found her in, Hannah had managed to doze off in her bondage and did not hear the door to the study open again. The young captive jerked into life when she felt hands start to unravel the tape over her eyes and blinked in the onset of sudden, blinding light. Sophia Elliot – bodyguard and butler of Lady Clara McCrystal -  had ventured to the windows and pulled back the curtains fully. Broad daylight streamed into the room and Hannah’s exposed eyes streamed in the brilliance of it. She looked frantically to the window to see if any passers by were looking in but then remembered that she was being held on the first floor; overlooking McCrystal Park. No-one would possibly be able to see her.

Her thoughts came thumping back to the here and now as she felt Sophia undo the ropes binding her to the chair. The overbearing figure of the bodyguard pulled Hannah sharply to her feet, and then swiftly undid her leg ropes.

  Hannah’s legs were almost dead; incredibly unsteady with all the time she had been tied up and she knew that if she tried to attack her kidnapper or break free in any way she’d have no chance. In any case, her arms and hands remained tightly bound.

  Sophia sneered at her captive and stood Hannah up straight, took her by the shoulder and pushed her towards the door of the extensive study. Hannah had little choice in the course of the journey as Elliott shoved her out further; through the doorway and down a short flight of stairs to the main hall of McCrystal’s Mansion.

  It seemed to Hannah like an eternity since she had broke into the mansion grounds; crept in through the window in the utility room by the back woods and up these very same stairs. In actuality, it was merely a few hours. Still, it was surely long enough for someone at the agency to make a move to get her back?

  Elliott was determined to keep Hannah moving. She pushed her on, down a yet narrower back stairwell to the basement pausing to pick up a riding crop from a hook on the way. The basement was huge; cavernous and centuries old, with brash, white emulsion on the walls and a high vaulted ceiling.

  On one side of the basement was an enormous wine rack about half-full of dusty bottles, but facing it, and more ominously, was her Ladyship; standing on a wooden step ladder in the dead centre of the room looping a rope pulley over an old butchers hook in the timber joist. Lady Clara was immaculate; clad in jodphurs and long leather riding boots with a white satin blouse and her dark hair swept back from her face. As she was hauled into the room, Hannah screamed uncontrollably into the gag and her body shuddered at the thought of what horrors lay in wait for her.

  “Ah, my dear Hannah. How nice to see you again. You slept well I trust?” The Lady gave her a smile that would have been quite alluring under other circumstances. “Now, we must continue from last night. You’ll understand that I need to know what you were looking for in my study and moreover, what that blasted Ms. Woods knows – or thinks she knows - about me.” The Lady took a slight step closer and grinned again. “So, the question is: are you going to tell us what we need to know, or are myself and Sophia here going to have to get a little bit rough with you?”

 Hannah’s mouth was still held captive under several layers of tape. The young girl shook her head rapidly and mumbled something along the lines of “No, no, no... never” into the thick gag. The Lady evidently could not decipher the muffled words but took them to be a negative response; just as she expected. Lady Clara stared hard at her young captive, and was forming opinions in her head; this Hannah Masters character was obviously a tough kid and presumably well trained, if the grapevine tales of the ‘Woods Detective Agency’ had any substance.

  “Untie her arms Ms. Elliott, then place her hands in front of her, if you would be so kind.”

  Soon enough, Hannah was cruelly and tautly strung up with her hands high above her head; stretched right to the pulley so her booted toes just touched the ground. Already, the strain was like fire in her arms. She squealed and whimpered into the gag as she tried to deal with the pain and the perilous predicament.

  Hannah’s mind slipped into a place it always did when she was up against it. Really up against it. She wondered: ‘What would Jenny do?”

  The ‘Jenny’ in question was Jenny Masters; Hannah’s older sister. She was Megan Woods’ first recruit at the Agency, and was now such a part of the organization she was more akin to a partner to Woods than an employee. To Hannah, Jenny was always as much a guardian as a sister, their parents had died tragically when Hannah was very young. More than that, Jenny was her role model: she was tough and super-cool and had always looked after her, even going to the extent of getting her a job in her office, before pushing her forward for promotion to detective. If Jenny was here, she’d know exactly what to do to get her out of the clutches of these fiends.

  Still, in her extreme peril and desperation, the thought of Jenny was of little consolation to her. Her sister was in the midst of a well-earned vacation, and wouldn’t be able to save her from this one. But maybe Megan still would.

  As Elliott finished tying her up again; legs at ankles and thighs with coils of the same white, rough rope, Lady Clara cut through Hannah’s gag and unwound it form her head and hair, then pulled it harshly from her mouth. Hannah gasped hard, licked her lips in apprehension and tried to regain her breath and the control of her voice.

  “Now, like I said: we will continue immediately from last night and I didn’t sleep well, so you will understand my temper is short. I wish to know most of all why you were looking through my file on Emiliano Ortega and his business associates. Why is Ms. Woods so concerned about my lifestyle and my business contacts all of a sudden? And, more pertinently, what you think we ought to do with your captive, lovely young body now...”

  Hannah glared at her aristocratic captor, kept her mouth shut and tried to think quickly. She was now in this well over her head and needed to come up with something really spectacular. Her dilemma was: even if she broke her vows to Megan and told the Lady and her Tramp everything she knew, Hannah didn’t believe for one second that she would then get in touch with the Police, or much less let her go.

  “I am waiting, rather more patiently than you deserve, Miss Masters.” Lady Clara gave a thin smile: she could see the turmoil building on the gorgeous face of the captive Hannah.

  “Here. Let me help make up your mind.” The Lady grabbed the riding crop from Sophia’s grasp, and, borne of years of practice, flicked it across her smooth bottom, which was poured into the skinny jeans. The denim succeeded in absorbing some of the blow. Hannah yelped in fear-filled pain, and tried to jerk away from her aggressor.

  “Pull her jeans down, Miss Elliott.”

 “No!”

  Hannah shook her head and tried to evade her but Sophia gripped her in place, unbuckled her belt and pulled her tight jeans down to her knees, exposing her pert young ass cheeks divided by a black thong.

  Elliott stepped back, and her Lady took in the sight for a moment, before raising the crop once again.

  This whipping continued for some time; after some ten or fifteen minutes the Lady grew fed up with Hannah’s screams and gagged her once again, this time with a large, red ball gag - very tightly buckled around her head.

 The Lady placed the crop aside, and began moving her hands over other parts of Hannah’s body, most fervently over her breasts. There was a further half an hour of teasing and molestation of her prisoner before Hannah hung sobbing in her ropes; utterly defeated.

  “Do I need to whip you again? Or do you realise how far I can go...” Lady McCrystal growled, very close to Hannah’s face. She pulled the drool-soaked ball from Hannah’s mouth, allowing it to fall around her neck.

  “Stop it, please stop it… I’ll tell you what I know...” Hannah choked, spluttered and pleaded.

  “Tough, but not quite tough enough.” Elliott sneered, circling the trembling Hannah.

  Lady McCrystal grinned wildly, and sat back on a wine crate beside Elliott to listen with mounting interest at the story that poured from the lips of her hostage.

  It seemed that Megan Woods had been tracking Lady Clara McCrystal for over two years.

  The saga had begun when the Lady had messed up one of Woods’ own personal bodyguard protection jobs on a politician’s wife by demeaning her; using her power with the press to issue widespread reports about the gross misuse of public funds. In the elapsing time since this ‘Hammond Incident’, Woods had been keeping a close eye on the Lady’s public and private business deals; publicly, she acted as a so-called ‘fixer’ for companies wishing to do business globally but particularly in South America, due to her extensive list of contacts for which the Lady took enormous commissions.

 Privately, Woods was also certain that the Lady also had a more sinister racket. Woods believed McCrystal and her allies provided girls for the omnipotent crime lord Emiliano Ortega; girls who disappeared south of the border into his Columbian cartels and beyond, and were never seen or heard of again. ‘White Slavery’, some quarters of the media deemed it, whenever they dared to go anywhere near Ortega’s fear-inducing name. The girls in question were not the usual showgirls and hookers but more well to do, educated career girls who catered to a different clientele of ‘Masters’. McCrystal always chose cunningly; preying on girls who had announced an intention to travel abroad; so they were not missed for months and by which time the trail was very cold.

  Woods had a dossier; documents containing sparse details of some eleven women over a four or five year period, but with not enough evidence to hold up in court against McCrystal’s crack team of lawyers, and the sleuth knew it. However, it seemed the conniving Lady Clara had for once chosen poorly for the last girl. Emilia Ford was the daughter of one of her best friends; for whom Megan was Godmother.

  Thus, the trail had now became personal for Woods and she had vigorously stepped up her work to find concrete proof. Now, it seemed McCrystal and Elliott were quite up to date with the tale: Woods had sent Hannah Masters; her finest young agent, into the mansion to uncover something in the files to satisfy the Police. Alas, her plan had not gone too swimmingly.

  At the end of Hannah’s long, sobbing litany, Lady McCrystal nodded slowly and sagely.

  “She’s getting very good you know; but I’m still five steps ahead of this meddling little bitch. Now, her next move. Presumably she will send another one of her young harlots round to check if you got in or not. I perhaps would do the same, in her position. We need to be ready for that, Elliott. And you, my dear Miss Masters, also need to be cleaned up and kept tucked away, nicely out of sight.”

  Lady Clara sighed heavily.

   “Take her away, Ms. Elliott.”

  Sophia Elliott knelt to untie Hannah’s legs then loosened the rope around her wrists. The young detective sagged and almost collapsed directly to the ground with fatigue.

  The tough bodyguard loomed over Hannah, using her towering frame to menacing, degrading effect.

   “Stand up bitch, and get up those stairs. Keep your hands up so I can see them all the time. And don’t you dare try anything stupid.” She looked at him bleakly but saw even less sympathy in her eyes than her voice as she turned and staggered – almost drunkenly - to the stairs.

  “Hands up, Missy. NOW!” Sophia roared. Hannah had forgotten her order and quickly raised her hands up, wincing with the pain as she did so. It was difficult climbing the stairs with her hands held high; especially as her legs were still somewhat dead and unresponsive but somehow, slowly, the intrepid young detective managed it. How she was going to manage to get out of this ordeal was altogether another matter for Hannah Masters now.

[satireknight]

S01E01: Turtle Tracks Part 2 (Electric Boogaloo)

It was getting kinda long, so I’m splitting it.

The Turtles play hardball with April, confirming that they’ll keep her prisoner until they figure out a solution that doesn’t involve them being chased down and experimented on. That sounds a lot more menacing than it is, because this is what it looks like.

Kind of like people waiting for an important phone call.

Eventually Leonardo comes up with a solution: they find the ninja thieves, and she gets to report on it without dragging them into the limelight. It seems a little pointless considering how instantly recognizable they become later in the series, but for now...

And then we get Shredder, the main villain of the series, who apparently sits around in a chair in a high-tech room. He used to have a kitty he stroked, but those blades on his hands made it very messy. And like the series itself, he’s a lot more serious and menacing here than he would later become. He also somehow knows about the Turtles being... well, turtles. I’m not sure why the mystery since earlier we saw that HE saw them right after they trounced his gang.

“We’re not going to find anything here!” Well, you won’t if you keep fondling the wall instead of checking the floor. 

They find a matchbook for “Ninja Pizza,” which delights Michelangelo because it means they can get pizza. Which raises the question, if they’re so inexperienced in the outside world that all their knowledge of humans comes from TV, how the hell do they get pizza? Like, do they sneak it out of delivery cars? For that matter, how do they have any money?

After a crazy old bat aims a gun at them, April buys them trenchcoat-and-fedora disguises that will literally only fool the legally blind. They also manage to repeatedly do and say things that make them REALLY noticeable, like Leonardo taking “cut the cards” very literally, or asking questions about what “humans” do. 

April also has trouble telling them apart, repeatedly calling them by the wrong names. This always makes me chuckle, because when you think about all the animation errors in this series, it almost seems like self-parodying foreshadowing.

This is where the goofy takes over, with a whole district devoted to ninja businesses. This might seem like a plot point, but it’s really not. 

Does Shredder literally have cameras everywhere? He has them in the sewers, he has them in businesses on the street... does he literally just spend all day flipping through different camera feeds in hopes that he’ll see somebody he can harass for eight seasons?

April decides to do the one thing you’re never supposed to do if you’re in even a teensy bit of danger: she wanders off by herself, and immediately gets caught and kidnapped. What did you THINK was gonna happen, genius?

When the Turtles finally finish dinner, they find her wallet and press pass... no, I don’t know Leonardo can recognize her wallet on sight. Then they spot her purse on top of a building.... you know, the purse she didn’t have in any previous scene, and thus they couldn’t recognize. Oops.

To rescue her, they have to fight their way through a small army of ninjas, who fortunately turn out to be robots. I say “fortunately,” because I assume that children’s TV standards wouldn’t allow the heroes to beat the shit out of living human beings, no matter how much they deserved it. Same sort of problem in X-Men, if I remember correctly. 

And yes, in case you’re wondering, Shredder has MORE cameras on the rooftop. And he’s now no longer concerned about whether they’re turtles, which is obvious, but about whether Hamato Yoshi trained them. Well, since you guys appear to be the only Foot ninjas left in existence...

The good guys chase the robots to another building, thanks to Leonardo apparently having a sword made of adamantium...

... and a throwing arm that could make him rich in baseball.

You know, I’d be a little curious if I were Donatello. “Hey, a guy who looks like Darth Vader’s shinier cousin! Ooo, pretty monitor... I lust after high-grade electronics!”

Shredder further confuses me by yelling, “They ARE turtles! Hamato Yoshi’s turtles!” So... first, you didn’t recognize that in any of the many other times you got clear well-lit shots of them? And how did you know about Hamato Yoshi’s pet situation?

He also shoots himself in the foot by commenting that he can’t let them discover his “Technodrome”... and then announcing its existence on the loudspeaker literally ONE SECOND LATER, causing them to immediately want to find out what it is. I’m thinking that Shredder is very literally his own worst enemy... and his own worst spy.

So the robots flood the place, and April and the Turtles run up the stairs to the top of the building, which has literally filled up in a matter of seconds. They also somehow managed to grab the complete outfit of one of the robots... sometime during all this, because they show it to Splinter, who confirms that it’s the uniform of the Foot Clan.

“My old enemy, Oroku Saki, must be nearby!”

It stands to reason, since you two are apparently the only actual people left who were in that clan. Seriously, where did all the human beings go? Did Shredder kill ‘em all and replace them with robots? Or did he just leave the whole clan behind in Japan, and they’re busy doing whatever the fuck they’re doing half a world away?

So it ends on a pizza gag, and a to-be-continued note.

The Verdict

Yes, I ragged on this mercilessly, but I mock because I care. It comes from a place of mocking love rather than hate. THAT I reserve for the Mutant Apocalypse arc.

And really, this episode is a pretty good opener. The animation was almost uniformly solid and consistent, the story was pretty good, and while the characters haven’t been too fleshed out yet, their individual quirks and qualities are already apparent (Donatello’s lust for electronics, Raphael’s snark, Michelangelo being pizza-obsessed and not too serious, Leonardo being a little TOO serious).

Speaking of serious, it also has a more adult tone than the later seasons would often have, with fewer jokes and less goofiness from both villains and heroes alike. Shredder in particular acts like a real credible villain, even though he doesn’t really do much in this episode besides talk to himself and hack camera feeds. 

It also has a more uneasy feel to the alliance between April and the Turtles, with them being all too happy to hold her captive until they can confirm that she won’t expose them, and her willing to throw them under the bus for her story. Really, she was a bitch to them - they save her life, and she decides to ruin their lives because “you’re still news” even if they didn’t commit any crimes? Stone cold.

Anyway, this is only the first part of a five-episode arc, so there’s plenty left to cover.

GRADE: A-

[jessknightintrouble-blog]

Captives Of The Cartel (3)

Chapter Three: A Daring Rescue?

  The ring of the doorbell echoed through McCrystal Mansion.

  Hannah had ceased her futile struggles and tried to move her head to trace the direction of the noise as the doorbell sounded once more. She had been allowed a cursory use of the bathroom then taken by Lady McCrystal - at gun point - to the Dining Room at the front of the west wing of the mansion.

   Sapped and defeated after the long hours in the captivity of Lady McCrystal, Hannah had also now been stripped: by now the attractive young detective was now clad only in her bra and knickers as Lady Clara went to town with her ropes once more. She felt ropes everywhere; no one rope pulled too much but each and every one kept Hannah in a tight package. She was completely helpless and now flat on her face in a strict hogtie that the Lady clearly savoured placing her in. Her glee was evident as she pulled Hannah to her knees whilst she gagged and blindfolded her once again.

  This time, a large cloth had been forced into the young detective’s mouth followed by even more excessive amounts of McCrystal’s favoured silver tape wound around her head. Carried away with herself, the Lady had pulled it so tight that Hannah’s whole face had started to move sideways, so she twisted the tape behind and reversed the flow. By the time the Lady had finished, Hannah’s pretty young face was near-enough invisible; covered by silver tape with only her nose poking free.

 To compound Hannah’s bondage, she and Elliott had dragged her under the table and roped her to the solid upright of the table leg. Being a hefty Georgian table the leg was both solid and thick, whilst the table itself weighed in so heavily she could never even begin to move it. Also unfortunately for Hannah, it was not quite high enough; so her gagged and blindfolded head was bent forward, awkwardly against the tabletop.

  Again, Hannah heard the loud chime of the doorbell and made an attempt to scream; knowing that the almost mummified state her face was in would never allow it. The resulting nasal, whining noise came out so muffled she doubted it could be heard five feet away, let alone downstairs. The young detective tried to jerk herself free; she had to make her presence known to the visitor. Tears started to flow into the fabric of the blindfold, as she found no route to freedom and heard Sophia Elliot’s measured clip-clop footsteps down the hall tiles, towards the door.

  “Good Morning Officer, Can I help you?” Elliott’s voice appeared to be on its best behaviour; and she was as smartly attired as ever in a dark pencil skirt and blouse, with a charcoal blazer over the top.

  “Good morning, Miss.” Came the response from the doorstep. Hannah’s heart leapt, it was Jordan Nerlinger; her partner and fellow rising star of the Woods Agency. They had come to rescue her!

  “Oh bliss...” Hannah thought, smiling to herself somewhere beneath the combination of gag and blindfold. She would surely soon be free; free to watch the police charge the slimy Lady McCrystal and her bitch sidekick with all their unspeakable crimes. Hannah listened hard as Jordan spoke again.

   “I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m following up a report from last night. I have to ask if your Ladyship had an intruder last night. We have had several reports of disturbances and are asking all householders around McCrystal Park.”

  “No, officer.” Elliott replied, sounding effectively surprised. “We heard nothing of that sort and certainly no-one got in here, I was on duty myself. As I’m sure your station is aware Lady Clara has a very efficient alarm system, and you’re welcome to check the CCTV footage but I can save you the trouble and guarantee that it will leave you empty-handed.”

  “I am well aware of the security measures, Miss; but if you would care to look at this you will see a reason for my concern in this matter.”

 Jordan, dressed favourably and convincingly in the attire of a local Police Officer, backed down the path and pointed upwards. Elliot followed her, somewhat warily. The young Officer was pointing to the Alarm siren housing on the side of the West Wing of the Mansion.

  “You can see that goo oozing out, Miss? They do that to fill the box up with foam to stop any noise. Are you certain you didn’t hear anything or found anything missing or untoward this morning?”

  “No, Officer.” Elliott shifted on the spot; a nervous motion not unnoticed by Jordan. “Sincerely, we know nobody entered the mansion grounds last night. Perhaps they were disturbed and will come back tonight? I will keep an extra close vigil, and also I’ll get the alarm company on a call out to sort that mess out immediately. I do apologize, I haven’t helped you much in your search.”

  “Very well, Miss. But do please ring this number; a hotline to our incident room, should you remember anything later on that may assist us.”

   The busty young ‘Officer’ turned and walked slowly down the path to the front gate. As Elliott stood near the front doors of the mansion, she rolled a number of details around in her head.

 “Incident Room, my arse!” She muttered under her breath, looking at the small card in her hand. “The line goes straight to Megan Woods’ desk: no doubt.” It didn’t add up for Sophia Elliott. The young girl didn’t look much like a cop. There was no squad car to be seen and no other Officer’s were around; and god knows, they always travelled in pairs.

  Jordan almost skipped down the street when she exited the gate from the McCrystal Mansion; “I’ve found Hannah!” she silently yelled to herself. All the time they were talking, Jordan had been attempting to look around that big lummox of a ‘Butler’. She’d seen on a hook at the back of the hallway a sleek black leather jacket; the type that Hannah had premiered last week on a staff night out at their local, ‘The Duke’. It had to be hers, there was no way the Lady or her sidekick was the owner of an identical jacket. Now, Jordan had to stake out the mansion to find out for sure; so she could call up the cavalry. But first of all, she had to get out of sight to phone Megan at the Agency with the much-needed positive news.

*

  “Who was that, Elliott?” McCrystal called from the Dining Room. She was decked out in black; a satin blouse and leather skirt leading down to some high heels.

  “I believe it was a friend of our guest, my Lady. Presumably another employee of that Queen snooper, Woods.”

  “Are you certain? Describe her.”

  “Yes, I’m certain, my Lady. There’s no way she was a genuine Police Officer. She was pretty tall, say 5ft 8ins. Well built, huge tits. Works out regularly, I shouldn’t wonder. Peculiar auburn hair; tied back but very long and very voluminous. Large eyes, full lips, very good looking. Very young, too; possibly even more so than our guest in there. I get the sneaky feeling she will not give up that easily though.”

 Under the table next door, Hannah was struggling to listen intently, then collapsed – depressed - into her bonds once more. Elliott had described Jordan to a tee and she had managed to get rid of her. Escape was still well out of the question and now, it seemed that the rescue was not coming. Still, she forced herself to keep the faith.

  Lady McCrystal’s voice from the next room was filled with glee.

  “I think we can let our pretty young guest down, now. Do be kind enough to move her to the back and perhaps leave her by the French doors so she can get some of this elusive sunshine. Then I want you out the back, sharpish. Assuming you’re right, Elliott, this next snoop will try to investigate and the front is quite evidently too open. Keep out of sight, but stop her reporting anything back to her agency. I want her brought in here quietly. For now, I am going to ring Mr. Ortega; I think we will soon have three rather wonderful presents for him, this evening.”

 Both Lady Clara and Sophia Elliott burst into excessive laughter. Hannah heard both their footsteps enter the room. She longed to be loose of the ropes just so she could give either one of these villains a good pounding. She soon felt hands about her, loosing the ropes holding her up, and then she was dragged across the carpet to the other end of the long room and left in her painful hogtie as the afternoon sun began warming her back. Hannah, struggled, and kept moving her head – which was all she could really move - to keep her nose clear of fibres from the carpet which seemed to invade her whenever she took a breath.

*

  Around the corner from the mansion, Jordan Nerlinger was making the phone call back to her office.

  “Megan? It’s Jordan. I have just called at her Ladyship’s as you wanted. Hannah is in there, I’m certain! They must be holding her prisoner in one of the rooms: I saw her leather jacket hanging up in the hallway. Yes, okay. I’ll go round the back to try and see in. I agree. They aren’t stupid enough to leave her in plain view at the front of the house. Cool. I’ll call in every hour as agreed. Bye.”

*

  Meanwhile, Elliott had crept out into the expansive hedge at the back of the West Wing, below the gleaming, eight foot wall bounding the property from Lanercost Street. She knelt down, waiting. Patience was going to be key in this situation.

  Sophia knew from interminable security checks where the easiest place to climb the wall was; utilizing a large oak tree whose branches towered and fell over the road. After just a few moments, Elliott was proved correct in her assumptions and she heard and saw movement in the tree. She froze, as the young girl was silhouetted on top of the wall for a few seconds before jumping down onto the grass. Jordan – still clad in her police attire - looked around, eased herself forward to peer through the bushes bringing up a tiny pair of binoculars from her side pocket. Swiftly and slightly anxiously she scanned the windows at the back of the mansion.

  “Nothing.” she hissed under her breath. “Come on, Hannah. Where are you? Try and show yourself...”

  Elliott shrank back, further round the wall. Still out of site of the intruder, she pulled a small radio unit out of her blazer pocket.

  “My Lady.” she whispered. “Do you read? Mmm. She’s here. She’s having a good old look but can’t see her friend. I suggest we make it easier for her. May I suggest on top of the billiard table as a good position?” Elliott heard the Lady’s acknowledgement and crept back forward to keep an eye a closer eye on her prey.

  Lady McCrystal strode into the Dining Room and with effortless speed, quickly undid Hannah’s hogtie and leg ropes,  sitting the girl up straight. She then pulled Hannah’s unresisting legs into a perverse ‘Lotus Position’; of ankle to opposite knee and roped them there. A longer rope from the middle of her shins around her neck and back kept her sitting taut, upright as the Lady then lifted her up and onto the billiard table. Outside, Elliott heard the hiss of satisfaction from the girl in the bushes as she now caught a tantalizing glimpse of her colleague through the large bay window of the Dining Room. Quickly, Jordan replaced her binoculars, raised her mobile phone up and punched a digit. The call went through immediately.

  “Megan… Megan?  I can see her!” Jordan’s voice was controlled into a whisper but filled with excitement.  “She’s inside the mansion, but they’ve got her tied up. I am going in to rescue her. It seems very quiet inside...... No I must go now. I don’t feel we can wait for you to get the Police. They might get the chance to hide her away. I will get her out. See you in half an hour. Out.”

  Jordan hung up and inhaled heavily. She started to creep forward through the bushes; trying not to make a single sound or show any movement.

 Elliott watched on, smiling at her valiant efforts as the girl moved ever closer to her, and her learned hiding position against the wall. Jordan came within six feet of her before she noticed her smiling face and - more importantly -the blue-black snub-nosed pistol barrel pointing at her head.

 Jordan gasped, putting her hands up and trying to stay cool.

 “Whoa… whoa. Who are you, please put that down...” She tried to reason. “You’ve got Hannah in there, and I want to leave with her or I’ll call the Police. Umm… the rest of the Police.”

  Sophia Elliott cackled.

  “I don’t think so, honey. You’ll do exactly what I say and you’ll be very, very quiet while you’re doing it. Now, get your hands up high and start moving down the path to the house.” Jordan, with little alternative, slowly raised her hands even higher, quite feebly, to shoulder level.

 “Not good enough, hon. I want them right up straight; interlocked behind your head and do not let them drop, or I may have to drop you.” Jordan complied and was marched forward: stumbling miserably down the flagstone path edging the lawn towards the open back door of the West Wing.

*

  Some few minutes later, Jordan found herself pushed into the large dining room to face the elusive figure of Lady Clara McCrystal. The Lady who was standing next to a wriggling figure in bondage, still sitting on the billiard table at the far end. The figure was limply protesting as she was playing with her nipples; tweaking, rubbing and massaging them for all they were worth. McCrystal had removed the blindfold, so Hannah was able to look sorrowfully at her partner Jordan, from her position of extreme helplessness.

  “There goes my great escape...” Hannah muttered into her gag. “Let’s see what bright ideas Megan comes up with next.” Her words came out as not much more than: “Trrggh Mpphhh Grrpphh.  Lggghh... Brrmmpphh Mmmppphhh, nggh.”

  “Ah, there you are my dear. I take it you know my little playmate here...” Lady McCrystal beamed, relinquishing her grip on Hannah’s wondrous orbs. “Decided that being a policewoman was too boring, eh? Much more fun climbing over walls and creeping through bushes. You should try not to get captured though, Princess. Now I get to have some fun with both of you.”

  She reached down into a sports bag and drew out some inevitable lengths of white cotton rope.

  “You may put your hands down now and remove the coat. I want you in your knickers, like this one. Quick.” The Lady’s voice hardened as Jordan stared at her in disbelief. She couldn’t believe the degradation this elegant, beautiful Lady had put her beloved Hannah through, and was now planning more of the same for her.

  “No way.” Jordan thought to herself. Stripping for this clearly deranged, upper class vixen didn’t hold much of a lure for the young detective. From behind her though, she felt Elliott’s large, rough hands reach over her shoulder and start to undo the top button of her coat. Jordan scowled, swatted her hand away but kept on going herself. The coat tumbled to the ground, leaving her tight police uniform showing.

  “And that kit too, if you please. I want it all off, I need to be sure you are free of any weapons.”

  For Jordan, tears started to flow. She realised this was getting super-serious and she was in some deep, deep trouble. Private Investigation had always seemed romantic and fun to her since she was a little girl, but now she was finally hitting upon the darker side of the profession. Woods had warned it would happen someday, but she chose not to think about it.

  Trembling, Jordan gingerly removed her clothes to stand in front of the Lady in her black Lycra knickers, her hands still up high.

  Lady McCrystal whistled through her teeth at the alluring show of flesh from her latest hostage.

  “Good. Very good, my dear. Now, place your hands behind your back, wrists crossed, if you would.”

  Within another few minutes of swift bondage, Jordan was sat bound in criss-crossing ropes on the billiard table next to Hannah in an identical, helpless ‘lotus’ position. Upsettingly, the ropes that bound them was also strapped tight to the hefty, old-school table with no room for manoeuvre at all. The Lady was finishing her handiwork by stuffing a large cotton cloth in Jordan’s mouth followed by some of the very sticky silver tape around her head numerous times to seal it in. Lady Clara stood back and pressed her hands firmly over the tape smoothing it down and sealing the edges. She smiled at her work and leant in to plant a slow kiss on Jordan’s tape-sealed mouth.

  “Glad to see I haven’t lost my touch over the years, Elliott. Still one of the best around, I believe.”

  “Indeed, my Lady. Quite sufficient and I cannot see any way they will be able to free each other. I shall just move them to opposite ends of the table to separate them more, Ma’am. Just to make doubly sure.”

  “Splendid idea! Do that, then how about some tea. All this bloody daytime exercise is quite exhausting, I tell you.” Lady Clara paused for a moment, checking her watch, nodding to Sophia. “Hmm. I can’t see the infamous Ms. Woods taking drastic action for some hours yet. Keep that phone handy, however, just in case she does ring.”

  Lady McCrystal caressed and patted the weeping Jordan gently on the cheek as she walked out of the room, whistling an old show tune. Elliott followed her out after lifting and moving Jordan to the far end of the billiard table. Jordan looked hopelessly over at Hannah with her big, reddening, tear-stained eyes; her partner was only some eight feet away but it could have been miles for all the good it would do them in their ghastly predicament.

[whump-cravings]

Hi!! I’m Mars and I go by *shakes pronoun bag vigorously* she/they/thon/ze/xe! I’ve been writing whump since I was young but only discovered the word for it a week or so ago and a whole community to boot. I can’t express how thrilling it is to find people who want to read my stuff!!

I used to write mainly women (the world doesn’t have enough) but now I find that I enjoy male whumpees and whumpers much more. That might change to enby characters as I grow more confident in my gender identity, but I’m not sure! I just. really like soft boys who get hurt lmfao

I’m still learning what exactly triggers whumperflies for me, but here’s some things that coincidentally appear in my works:

Hurt/comfort

Kidnapping and captivity

Hair & neck grabbing

Restraints, gags, muzzles, blindfolds

Fantastic racism

Slavery, sold to an enemy

Defeated and Trophified

Reluctant Caretaker, Reluctant Whumper

Forced to strip, threat of noncon

Take Me Instead

Disassociation

I only have the beginnings of two of these posted but here’s what I’m currently working on:

Enthralled - Tseth is a 24 yo dhampire (human-vampire hybrid) making his way in the world when he’s betrayed and delivered into the hands of a monstrous man.

The Jokan Prince - Soft-hearted Prince Eljonik Ondivég is taken captive by a band of merciless mercenaries and disguised as a debt slave. When he learns of a harsh betrayal and makes his escape, things only become more difficult as the entire world seems against him.

Hakon - When his homeland falls to an invading emperor, Prince Hakon sacrifices himself to save his siblings. In return, the emperor expects him seduce and spy on the emperor’s son.

Bird Box Boy - Lemon thought it was a bird they had seen on the side of the road, but instead it was an unconscious birdman. They brought him home only to discover the barcode on the inside of his wrist and that the extent of the damage inflicted upon him has rendered him nearly unresponsive to the world. Can they help him back to life and keep him safe from whoever did this?

i have “too many WIPs” itis so I’m constantly finding something new and shiny to toy with lmao

some of my favorite whumpers: @thewhumperinwhite​ @wildfaewhump​ @whumping-every-day​ @redwingedwhump​ @tendertenebrosity​ @secretwhumplair​

Whumpmas in July - Day 1

Blog introductions are a staple of the whump community! Browsing tags such as "#whump intro" and "#whump community" you can see new whumpers introducing themselves every day. If you haven't formally introduced yourself yet, take today as an opportunity to do so! Tell us as much or as little about yourself as you want--who you are, what sorts of whump you love, what content we can expect to see on your blog, favorite color, etc.!

If you've been around a while and have already introduced yourself, feel free to re-introduce yourself for any new followers, or take a moment to give an overview of any whumpy projects you may be working on at the moment!

You can reblog this post with your introduction, or make your own post. And don't forget to browse the reblogs here and the relevant tags to see other people's intros! You might just find your new favorite story or a wonderful new friend!