#kelvin fucks up

[hrefna-the-raven]

Rebound

First date - tell me more, tell me more - Black velvet dress - Cloudy mornings and sweet bareness - Kiss me, you fool - Waiting in the wings - You're only falling now? - Morning dew and dances - Cannibalypse now - Blood in the water - Silver lining - The Cube - From one hell to another - Dazed and confused

Words:1990

Warnings: alcohol abuse, panic

Kelvin had been anticipating this day for a whole painful week now, torn between hope and the fear of failing inevitably. His job interview for an open mechanic position at the local garage was just around the corner but he simply couldn't shake off the nerves that had been gnawing at him for days. It was a tough time for him as his PTSD had been acting up lately, leaving him struggling to keep it under control while every little noise threw him into an unbearable state of constant panic. Every little thing seemed to set him off, even the children shouting outside while playing were too much for his brain to handle. It was frustrating, to say the least. But, there still was a glimmer of hope. You had managed to pull some strings with a doctor you worked with for many years and get Kelvin the medication he so desperately needed, including a fine working pair of seondhand hearing aids which made communicating with each other much easier. It wasn't much, but it was enough to help him get through the day without feeling like he was going to die of a panic attack at any given moment. As he stood in front of the mirror, clumsily trying to tie his tie, the impending sensation of failure crept up his neck, clawing itself deep into his mind. He had tried so many times, but his shivering hands just couldn't get it right. You passed by, ready to head out on your way out to work, noticing his struggles and walked over to him.

"Here, let me help you," you said softly, taking the tie from his hands.

Kelvin sighed wearily and slumped his shoulders.

"I can't do this," he whined, "I can't do any of this!"

Your hands paused in their tracks and you looked up, inspecting his face as your brows furrowed.

"Yes, you can, T-Bird" you said firmly, "you've come this far, and you're not going to give up now. You survived hell, you've been sober for two weeks, you've got the right pills and you're able to hear my antics again, so nothing's holding you back, my love."

Kelvin nodded, unable to hide a faint smile as he felt a tiny glimmer of hope.

"I guess you're right, as usual" he declared, straightening his shoulders, "maybe I can do this."

You smiled and finished tying his tie.

"There you go," you whispered, patting him on the back, "you look fantastic! How could anyone ever resist you while you're looking this irresistibly sexy?"

Kelvin chuckled and took one last deep breath before heading out the door with you. He was nervous, anxious but he also noticed that tiny bubble of hope in his chest. As he walked to his interview, his mind reminisced about how far he had come. And, no matter what happened, he knew he had you on his team and, hopefully, no cannibals or mutants working at the garage.

The time at work passed agonisingly slow, your eyes darting to your phone every few minutes, checking for any message of Kelvin but no matter how often you looked, no new messages were blinking up. You leaned back in your chair, a defeated sigh leaving your lips as you took the next paper from the pile, dialing the phone number on it, mentally preparing for the call with the patient's health insurance when your mobile phone suddenly rang, displaying the number of the garage.

Kelvin sat nervously in the small office room behind the workshop, his palms sweating profusely as he fidgeted with the bottom of his tie. He was struggling to find work and this was the first real opportunity that came across since the army threw him out. This job, as a mechanic in the local garage, seemed like a lifeline, a gateway to the bright future with you he craved so desperately. Jeff, the owner of the garage and interviewer was a tall, broad-shouldered old man who looked like he had seen his fair share of hard work. Kelvin answered all his questions confidently, trying to mask his nervousness and desperation. He talked about his experience in the army and how he quit to be closer to his girlfriend who lived in the very same town. Jeff seemed impressed and asked a few more questions. But then, the sudden sound of the electric torque wrench started to echo through the garage. Kelvin's body immediately tensed up, and his mind was flooded by an overload of flashbacks from his time on the island. The sound reminded him of the ferocious screeching of the monsters he had heard not too long ago when that one cannibal almost killed him and the trauma from those moments held his entire being hostage. He tried to fight it, to push through the panic rising inside him but all his logical thoughts drowned in the bellows of torturous memories. It grew to be simply too much as his words morphed into a jumbled mess and he couldn't sit still in his seat. His hands were shaking and sweat was pouring down his face. Finally, when the agony threatened to overwhelm him completely, he mumbled something about being sorry and quickly darted out the garage as if the very essence of his life depended on his escape. He could hear the owner of the garage calling after him, but he didn't stop. Jeff watched him go, a worried look of disappointment on his face. He had been impressed with Kelvin's experience and professionalism up until that point. But now, he was just another nervous wreck, another victim that was spat out the army's cruel machinery. He'd know perfectly well how that felt, remembering his own time on the battlefields of the gulf war and how he'd been discarded after he came back broken. Jeff grabbed his phone and called the person who recommended Kelvin to him.

Kelvin felt like a failure, like he couldn't even handle a simple interview, what happened to him had left him a wreck and nothing could ever fix him again. Not even you, he'd simply drown you along with him, never being able to forgive himself for doing so. He had let his past trauma get the better of him, and now he was left with nothing yet again. Maybe it was his fate to end up miserable and alone, with all what happened, he felt like he deserved nothing else. As he walked down the street heading to your home, Kelvin couldn't keep himself from the hearing the sweet call of intoxication. The unbearable weight of reality was tearing him down and, for the first time in two weeks while being alone, the recent failure took a hold of him and he instinctively grabbed the bottle of white wine in your fridge as soon he was back at your place. The panic emerging from his memories and the disappointment sang a bittersweet siren's song to him and he failed to resist. Not wanting to loose any time to finally dive into the tempting numbness, he downed the whole bottle at once, coughing bitterly at the sweet taste as he felt his mind drift off to a shamming realm of comfort. He threw the bottle in the trash, taking off his tie, unbuttoning his shirt, his body slumping down on the couch as he heard the front door open.

As you opened the door, your eyes immediately darted to Kelvin's figure on the couch, sagging shoulders, a hazy gaze traveling towards you. You took your coat off and left it along with your purse on the small table next to the entrance as you headed towards your soldier, sitting next to him.

"Are you alright ?", your hand gently rubbing his arm.

As Kelvin turned around to face you, you couldn't shake the feeling that something was off with him. He wasn't aware that Jeff had actually called you to explain how the interview went, so he wouldn't sense that you'd know already how hell broke loose during the interview. His clouded mound was currently solely obsessed with how your beauty seemed so alluringly tempting, a deep groan building up in his chest as he could feel the restraints of his growing buldge in his pants. He wanted you, he needed you, right here and now. Only the intoxicating touch of your delicate hands could relieve him from the pain he had endured today. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you close as his lips sloppily pressed on yours, his tongue trying to force its way inside your mouth. The taste of the sweet wine invaded your taste buds, the sudden realisation of what happened after the interview hitting you immediately as you pushed the soldier away.

"You've been drinking?!", you yelled, barely able to contain your rising anger despite knowing better.

"What does it matter? You're beautiful, I love you and I want you", Kelvin huffed, his hands gripping your wrists, pulling you closer again as he ran his tongue along your neck.

Disgust filled your entire mind as you wriggled to escape his hold, slapping him right on his cheek as soon as one of your hands was free. You weren't letting yourself play along with his drunken mind games, he had to realise what had happened and what tragedy seemed to unfold in this very moment. Kelvin blinked at you, startled, taking a few seconds to realise what just happened.

"You idiot!", you screamed, "why on earth did you drink again? What gave you the idea that this was the right thing to do? Answer me!"

Kelvin jumped up from the couch, his fingers buried into the fabric of your t-shirt as he hauled you up on your feet, his other hand roughly cradling your neck forcing you to look at him. You'd never seen this side of him and it frightened you deep down to your core. For a moment you weren't sure what was about to happen. You were aware that combination of his pills and alcohol could cause violent outburst, praying to all the gods you could think of to not let him hurt you in any way, fearing to break what little brightness you'd been able to retrieve in your relationship. But to your surprise the angry expression on his face washed away and his chest heaved, uncontrollable sobs bubbling up as sorrowful tears formed in the corners of his eyes.

"I-I'm sorry, I failed, failed", Kelvin fell on his knees, finally releasing the threatening hold on your t-shirt, "I'm worthless and I'll drag you down with me. I-I-I...", his words broke up, only stuttering sounds leaving his mouth.

You took a deep breath, trying to somewhat sort your fear and anger, trying to focus on being the tower of strength Kelvin so desperately needed now, even though you felt like the complete opposite. It wasn't an easy task, you had already invested a lot of your energy on trying whatever you could to keep him afloat, sacrificing whatever sanity you still possessed in the process. You kneeled down in front of him, gently caressing his cheeks.

"Jeff called me you know", you breathed, unsure whether you should talk to him about or not.

Kelvin blinked at you, his intoxicated mind trying to process the information thrown at him.

"I recommended you, I know Jeff through work, he served in the army as well and knows how the battlefield can have a toll on you, he called me explaining what happened."

"I'm so soo-o-orry!", his slurred sobs grew louder.

You held his head up, nudging the tip of his nose with yours to force his focus on back you.

"Jeff will give you a chance, you're hired, he understands", you whispered, pecking his lips, "it's gonna be ok", you repeated almost religiously as you'd be trying to convince not just Kelvin but also yourself.

Part 15 - In good hands

SotF masterlist

[travellingtribble]

I'm in my feels thinking about how fucked up the TOS crew ended like

Kirk got stuck in the nexus from ~2293 to 2371 only to die again, for good, as soon as he got out? Come on. come on man.

Bones got old. like really old. and didn't get to see Kirk again??? It's been a while since I watched the TNG episode with McCoy, I don't remember what he says, but he was like 150 years old. Did he ever even see Kirk before he got stuck in the Nexus. Did he ever see Spock? (I'd hope so, Spock disappears years later, in Picard if I'm correct?)

Spock was... around doing Spock stuff. And then Kirk died and did Spock even know? did someone tell Spock that his literal soulmate died. twice. and then Spock got stuck in another universe, a reality slightly different from his own, where everyone is younger than him and Jim is not really Jim and he has his own Spock anyway and his planet is gone and he lived the rest of his days in the Kelvin timeline, alone.

And Scotty got stuck in a transporter buffer for 75 years. That's so long. They had to tell him Kirk was gone? (although, they were together when that happened, weren't they? they were on the Enterprise-B, technically Scotty knew that Kirk was "dead" didn't he? I guess spending 75 years stuck in a buffer mode will screw up your memory though.) Did he see Spock again? Did he see Bones again before either of them died?

Basically the only ones we didn't see explicitly (or implicitly) die or disappear of the OG crew are Uhura, Chekov and Sulu. Where were they? what were they doing? did they know about Kirk? about Scotty? about Spock?

Sorry but like. that is so fucked up. why does nobody talk about this!!!

[keefechambers]

Kelvin & Keefe + being exceptionally bad at hugging

[moeblob]

Amazing, take some of the side character demons from Evil Bound.

Vincie is a menace to Chuck and Chuck alone so in Hell, Chuck hexes his hand behind his back so that he isn't grabbed as much (and it's harder to pet him). Chuck is like the most irresponsible older sibling ever to demons though so Kelvin recruits him (as an older sibling vibe) to go help him get his ACTUAL older sibling from Earth. Chuck agrees. And then drags Vincie from Hell with them because no one else wants to babysit him and he refuses to unbind the hex just to re-hex when he returns to Hell.

In Hell, Kelvin actually doesn't appear much different than his human form! Like Kronos, the lines under his eyes are red in Hell but black on earth. Chuck however? In Hell he has wolf-ish ears and has a fur lining his neck (note the neck scars in human form). In addition to that he has four eyes in Hell (note the scars under his eyes in human form). Vincie just has horns in Hell. And! In Hell the hex doesn't have a silly looking "tied up" look, it's invisible unless Vincie strains it with movement and then its red text. But it shifts on earth to be visible.

Vincie's biggest agony for the entirety on earth is "dude it's colder here than in Hell I want a jacket to slip my arms into BUT I CANT BECAUSE IM BOUND".

[iceswords]

❄️🐉 - starter !!

( @draconicfool liked this. )

guess who snuck all the way to jarilo-vi again? this lieutenant! he knows how to operate the tech in stargazer navalia to get a starkiff and has grown very efficient in piloting a starkiff at this point, so it wasn't that hard for him to manage - even if he acted on a whim and didn't tell anyone about it.

he needed a quick get away but more importantly the young boy wanted to see his fath- wanted to see shoi-ming!

now here he was! being very helpful in the clinic might I add as even if he came to get away from all the stress of being the Genius Teen Prodigy™️, he should still make himself useful.

fitted now in a long white coat that fades into his usual blues and pinks with gold and red as accent colors. white ear muffs to keep his ears warm in this blasted cold. different from his usual outfit as it had more a belobog style but still possessed his signature swallow and cloud motifs while his pink money pouch hung from this black belt that was worn around the waist of his coat.

easy to move around while also keeping him warm.

a sliver rounded lock engraved with the shape of a cloud found it's home on the back of the boy's coat below the collar. his mere presence brightening up the day of any of the sick or injured patients, especially the younger orphans who yanqing would spend a lot of time with whenever he came to visit.

currently sat on the chair beside the bed of one such young patient with a gentle placement of a black gloved hand on top the younger's as the blond periodically checked over his shoulder at the entrance to the clinic.

" you're doing great, kelvin! remember.. slow deep breaths." he spoke warmly before doing an demonstration of what he meant which kelvin then copied, " good job! just keep that up now, okay?"

[grinchwrapsupreme]

not to be a Youngest Child but pre-kiss Kelvin Gemstone actually makes me feel physically ill with sympathy like

this guy was the favourite as a child but peaked when he was 12 and now he is desperate for his father's attention and approval, something he'll never get in a way that will satisfy him

he lives in a huge house all alone, a house that other people call lonely, and he is the only member of the family to live alone until his mom dies and keefe moves in

he spends 40% of his time around children, 40% with his family, and the remaining 20% begging keefe to hang out with him to avoid that giant empty house

even without the age gap, he's the outlier amongst his siblings being the only one like their mom instead of like their dad, not to mention the sexuality he's been repressing all his life

when he's kidnapped he cannot think of a single person who will miss him when he's gone and his siblings have to remind him about keefe, neither of them knowing that keefe is gone, kelvin not knowing that keefe will come back

his father hit him so much that the first thing he says after hitting back is "how does it feel to be on the receiving end?" only for his dad to break his thumbs and remove what little power he's managed to scrounge up for himself that wasn't inherited from that same father

like that guy is fighting tooth and nail for a life he can be proud of and for people to notice him as more than just one of the Gemstone Siblings and at every step he keeps getting knocked right back down again and all along the way keefe is the only person who notices him, recognizes him, and keefe is the only one kelvin cannot allow himself to get close to in the way he wants

[lapetitepersonne]

*head in my hands* Kelvin said to his face that the rocking chair was stupid just to hurt him (because he was hurt) when Keefe probably spent hours on it and did it all for him and even put his NAME on it even though in the precedent scene at the carpentry Kelvin told him all about how Taryn perfectly replaced him and was so looooved by everyone and no one missed Keefe (BITCH YOU MISS KEEFE AND EVERYBODY KNOWS IT EXCEPT KEEFE WHICH IS THE PROBLEM) and this basically just confirmed to Keefe that he isn't needed but he still loves Kelvin so much and he was just desperate to show him what he could still do for him as a carpenter (because he failed him as an assistant youth pastor) and made him a fucking rocking chair and Kelvin said it was STUPID

[patchoulol]

That Ace Combat video is how I feel about Star Trek.

[heartsdefine]

↪ memes — accepting!

@captseven said: ❛ i’m not leaving you. ❜ (for the thirteenth doctor, please!)

        “You've got to,” the Doctor says, in a tone that echoes with a few billion years' worth of authority. Their hands pause, hovering over the blinking controls. “When I send out this signal, it's going to short out any tech within a thousand feet of here. I don't know what it might do to you, and that's why you need to be inside the TARDIS before I hit the last button. Her shields will keep you safe.” She puts a hand on Seven's shoulder. “Go. I'll be fine.” 

[dilfcherricola]

i know we all hate america here but every time i see a canadian or god forbid a european talking about how gross our food is i reach my hand a little closer to my red white and blue trucker hat

[attentionhoard]

The Fahrenheit defenders have logged on

[cyrilvows]

i might just completely revamp my old WDAU content it has far surpassed where I was at when I started this blog. half of the characters look like ocs at this point. that's why it's kinda been on hiatus as far as content goes. bear with me y'all I will get back to you o7 (the 2 people who care about this au if that)

[keefechambers]

KELVIN GEMSTONE & KEEFE CHAMBERS in THE RIGHTEOUS GEMSTONES SEASON 2

"You didn't have to make it weird." "Yes, he did."

[dexaroth]

when i finish the game you will all get to experience a barrage of sotf reblogs. i expect none of you to survive but sacrifices must be made

[grinchwrapsupreme]

i'm so fascinated by kelvin's idea that having broken thumbs makes him a monster and the thought processes surrounding that like tell me about your dysmorphia king tell me how your self-worth is tied to looking and feeling a certain way tell me how your dad comes into it like god forbid this guy ever become permanently disabled why does he even have that cape

[spocks-evil-godmother]

To just uncritically enjoy Strange New Worlds for a second... I love the way that they are intentionally and seriously playing with Pike's arc and specifically drawing out the implications of what it REALLY means to not be the protagonist in this story. It's all well and good to say that there are no no-win scenarios when you are, in fact, the protagonist, and you and your crew merrily sail along at the end of every hour-long episode. But they aren't writing a character from scratch. They're pulling from this one moment, really, where the TOS writers were like, lol what if we made this fucked up thing happen. And unlike the Kelvin timeline, they don't sanitize it down to "oh, he just uses a wheelchair and then is tragically killed womp womp." No. Here is a character who suffers, in perpetual pain, with little means to communicate, in a world with such significant medical advances as to make this injury one of the most profoundly isolating experiences possible. And Pike chooses it.

He doesn't choose it just once, the first time, when the vision is offered to him. It is something he chooses again, to save Spock's life, and then to save all the lives that Spock will save by ending the conflict with the Romulans, when he is granted that knowledge. And there's something really delightful in that they CAN'T bend this narrative. Spock really is that important. He's the protagonist. He has things to do, you might say. They've spent 60 years establishing this. And that puts Pike in this position of having to humbly step back, and choose something painful for himself out of his own commitment to service, sacrifice, compassion, and love--and be satisfied that it is the RIGHT choice, whatever it means for him.

And I think I also love that it then it kind of answers this mysterious question presented in "The Menagerie," which is, of course, why does Spock go to all this bother for this guy? And sure, it's one thing for Spock to say, "I just respect the hell out of this dude," but SNW is really making a point of solidifying that yeah, he does though. Christopher Pike has a heart so big it changed everything, actually. And that's a story worth telling.