#kelly's long reads

[kirasworldofwords]

Marilou is a horrible person as well. There’s a thread of her on Twitter/X of her being a Zionist as well as being in contact with Zionists.

There’s also been reports of her being a mean girl (at the Canadian GP, during the BOSS event, she was spotted with her friend mocking and making fun of fans at the event acting very judgemental) along with her allegedly making fun of someone’s weight.

Lance himself, it’s tricky, although I do feel bad for him, he also has dated an IOF(?) solider in Dian Schwartz.

Honestly so so glad she's away from him now. Perhaps he'll see the light soon...? I'm being carefully hopeful here. Because knowing what I know, the drama about Kelly and Max, something with Carlos, many things with Lando... I'm starting to get trust issues for real, lmao.

Still kinda hopeful of course, it'd be a shame otherwise.

[sunnykeysmash]

the structure, the "explosion", change and authenticity: a dissection of season 15

As usual I'm prefacing this post by saying these are my personal ramblings about always sunny meta so if you don't like to see that, then please move along.

When season 15 ended, I didn't end up analyzing it because my fixation had ended as well, so that's what I wanna do here, but in order to do that I have to touch on some themes that were heavily relevant in previous seasons but especially season 14.

I also want to properly explain why I've been calling season 14 "the last classic season of sunny", and why I think of season 15 as "a transitional season".

It seems weird, but I wanna start by talking about the season 13 episode, The Gang Escapes.

I've done a quick rewatch of s14 and 15 and the more I did that, the more I started to see Escapes like the predecessor for a lot of it.

So, in it, the gang is playing a game of escape rooms. They are trapped inside of Mac and Dennis' apartment, with only Dee knowing how to get out having done it before. Despite this, she is locked out, and is unable to help them. The boys separate and wrestle for a pair of heartshaped lock and key, and in the end, when they finally settle on how to open it, they discover that inside it says "And so the game begins".

The lock contains a ton of instructions on what to do next, but the gang quickly realizes they have run out of time and are unable to do them all, only for Dee to take the fall allowing them to win albeit in an unconventional way.

This episode reads to me like a cautionary tale on the fate of sunny.

Spending so much time on deciding how to do something or whether they should at all, that when they finally do it, they don't have the time to properly explore the choices they've made. As an example, this comes back with the concept of the seeds. In general, this is always touched upon whenever "imminent death" is explored, because it doesn't allow them more time to continue. This is often paired with a need to "go crazy/explode" by the end.

As a result, feeling constrained inside something and needing to get out before it's too late.

I'll elaborate more on all of this as we walk through s14/15, all the ways in which these themes come back, but for now I want to say that to me, this is likely how RCG has felt writing sunny sometimes: feeling too constrained/boxed inside the way they have always written it, that didn't allow them to branch out and explore the stuff they really wanted to "until the end", which in a way made them feel like sunny itself was the problem and made them consider ending it (aka cutting the head because the hair is a lie) to explore the stuff that interested them, rather than just... doing it while they have time, and being more loose with writing it in general (like how Gus said, the bible is a guidepost, interpretations can change over time).

As such, Escapes is an incomplete view on the situation, a negative one, it shows us what would happen if nothing gave in. Which isn't what happened in the end, but it's still important to keep in mind to read the rest of it.

This is, to me, why they even asked for four seasons in the first place. To have the time to properly explore all the things they wanted to touch on, with their new plan.

I'm gonna try to dissect every episode singularly (the ones I think are relevant anyway) and point out the connection in themes and what I think it all means. I tried to stay brief, believe me.

All in all, some of the themes I've found are as follows: the structure, death/catastrophe, running out of time/losing something (even disappointing an audience), change, and choices. They all apply to writing sunny.

Season 14

This season brings back a lot of stuff from past sunny. It seems s16 will do the same, but back when s14 was just airing, I remember this felt odd to me. Chokes is a direct continuation of dines out (with it being charlie and frank's anniversary dinner) and also calls back to mac's mom burns her house down and dennis system (with the whole poisoning someone so they can depend on you and nursing them back to health etc), poppins comes back, jackie denardo comes back (storm of the century, which also references bryan o' bryen), thundergun comes back, dee day (which is a continuation to mac day), global warming references Spies like US (the fish factory dudes), the waiter comes back... and so on. It felt like they were honoring the past.

But the reason why I consider it the last season of classic sunny, is because it's the one before change strikes. Many episodes seem to place us in front of an inescapable choice that leads to disaster. Some don't even offer a choice, just speak of imminent death.

The Gang Gets Romantic

Breaking this episode down, it's important because it introduces the whole concept of the "structure". A guideline, if you will, that the characters can either follow or stray away from. Throughout the two seasons we will see it redefined constantly, so it's important to understand what it is.

We are given two mirroring plotlines making use of this (romcom) structure. Frank and Charlie follow it pretty closely, and in the end they are rewarded with a romcom-y ending. Mac and Dennis stray from it, because they don't realize that the tropes are applying to the two of them, and in the end, their plans fail. This is actually counter to most other examples of structure that will be written later, and it shows us something important, which is that the structure can work if applied correctly and when appropriate.

So is the structure good or bad? Should it be followed? And what is it?

To me, the structure is a guide. It can aid you find what works on average, but it shouldn't lock you in. Exactly like structure in writing.

But it doesn't matter how you call it: the structure, the algorithm, god's plan, the bible, the base, the four walls encasing you, tradition; it's about something that gives you a foundation, but that you can branch out of, if needed. If your feelings tell you you should.

Multiple episodes will come to grips with this concept. Trying to run from it entirely, or embrace it to the point of almost doing things they don't want.

This is RCG's own struggle with understanding how to write sunny, and what sunny even is, hence why the main theme of season 15 is identity. How much can you stray from your core structure and still be yourself? How much before you don't even like where you're going? What defines you?

And in fact, a crucial theme in TGGR is falling back in love with something.

Pushing it away at first because you think you can get better than that or because you're bored of it, only in its absence to realize that it was already the perfect match. This is the charlie+frank/alexi+nikki plot (we'll be back in one year... covid aside, this is about the show returning and not ending), but it reflects season 15 in general (when you love someone, you can't bear to leave them behind).

Finally, "you think they're gonna give us a bad review?", hinting at the fear of how others will react.

Thundergun 4: Maximum Cool

The gang is selected to judge the sequel of a franchise they are big fans of. However, upon discovering the many changes applied to it (they're rebooting the franchise), they are disappointed and angered. In the end, Dee comes up with the plan that forces the franchise to go back to its roots, and the gang still doesn't support it.

So, how does this fit into our themes?

We have a franchise that has changed to the point of upsetting its fans.

We also have Dee once again being the key role in the story by coming up with the successful plan.

We have talk of a powerful formula that could destroy millions of lives in the wrong hands.

We have change seen as scary and upsetting, and we have talk of "rebooting the franchise".

Most importantly:

"Sometimes, in order to save something, you have to destroy something. And I think I know what we have to do to save Thunder Gun."

"Destroy it?"

This will plateau with Big Mo with its fake ending, but it speaks to the larger theme of considering ending sunny to get to the stuff they want to explore, only to realize they can explore it better if they start now and give themselves more time and just stay looser with the structure.

This is a talk they actually had with Larry David (who will be referenced as Larry Takashi later, creator of Fun Zone laser tag).

"McElhenney continued, “He (Larry David) said, ‘Don’t be an idiot. Never stop. Just keep doing it. One, because it’s the greatest job you could ever want and two, because if you do a final episode they’ll just destroy you for it.’”"

Around the same time, another article came out where Glenn mentioned wanting to follow Curb Your Enthusiasm's model.

"So with all these other projects, like last year, I'm sure you've talked now and again about ending the show for good." G: "We talked about it. At a certain point, we might look at this and go “Yeah, we did it and it's time to move on,” and all that kind of stuff. But I think at the same time the way I see it, we're more like a band than a show now, where we all go off into our side projects, but like, this is the band, and if we feel like putting out another album, we'll put out another album. At this point, it doesn't really make sense to end the show in any official capacity. It's possible that moving forward we move to sort of like a Curb Your Enthusiasm model if we can get away with it. Larry David actually pulled Rob aside at some kind of a function and told him "One piece of advice I'll give you guys: Don't ever end the show. Just don't end it!” I think he figured that out after Seinfeld. I think he was really burned out. But with Curb he knows he might want to come back to it years down the line."

Keep in mind, when these two articles came out, season 15 had not even been written yet. Despite this, me and others started speculating that A. the seasons would return whenever instead of each year; B. each season would follow a story arc.

Seasons got shorter (and point A may still happen), and season 15 ended up following a story arc.

Finally, Dennis once again places us in front of a choice by saying "give me dong, or give me death", implying those are the only two options the franchise has.

Dee Day

There is a choice that has to be made by vote, and the gang is trying to sway the results. In the end Dee hatches a successful plan that just so happens to have the same outcome wanted by the gang in the first place.

We start with them stretching (irony not lost on me 😭) to stay loose because they're preparing for the plan.

"Can we just start?"

"No, we can't just start, okay? Preparation is the key to victory."

Reminds me of Chokes:

"Yeah, but can we just, like, play already?"

"No, we can't just play, Charlie. We can't just play."

"Are you insane?! We can't just play!"

Again getting lost on the how, on preparation, instead of starting. Arguing instead of opening the lock.

Additionally, it's said that Dee wants to do a whole retrospective of her characters. It fits with what S15 has done so far.

Still, we are shown Dee pulling the strings even when it comes to directing the characters.

"And like all great plays, this one is going to have a happy ending."

The Gang Chokes

Frank almost chokes to death during their dinner. Charlie admits he almost let him die because he was mad at him for "interrupting him". At the same time, Mac is taking all his cues to act from Dennis, even in drastic situations, instead of showing that he can make his own decisions, which is what Dennis really wants.

"I would've stepped in, but, of course, I was taking my cues from you." "Why?" "Well, you didn't tell me whether I should save him or not." "But why?" "I mean, why do I still have to tell you what to do?" "And why is it up to me to decide whether or not you're going to save a man's life?"

Being able to make your own decisions depending on what you want to do, instead of always following someone else's directions, regardless of what the outcome is...

"So you were still gonna rely on a decision that somebody else made, only, this time, you were potentially gonna kill a man?"

Dee also starts living on the edge of life and death because it gives her a thrill, but ultimately experiences true death and realizes there is nothing on the other side.

Frank goes to live with someone else (the waiter), but in the end realizes Charlie was already perfect for him. Once again, breaking out and almost ending things only to see all he already had in the end, because Charlie apologizes to him.

And Mac learns to make his own decisions instead of depending on others. Like the structure meta.

The Gang Texts

The bananas thing with the gorilla.

"I sit there, eat a banana real slow, and he comes up to the glass, and he's banging on the glass like the dumb ape he is."

"It will bang its hands bloody trying to get the banana."

"How is that funny?"

"It's funny 'cause he can't get the banana."

Just like the seeds in s15, it's about writing, or rather questioning the way they have written things in the past. Frank insists withholding the wanted thing is hilarious, and Charlie questions it.

Like in Still in Ireland:

"Oh. I should eat it again. Then it would be funny 'cause I didn't learn my lesson."

"No, that wouldn't be funny. It'd just be kind of dumb, you know."

Deriving humor from the characters never learning their lesson, being beaten down by the narrative, never getting what they want. Which is a key component of the classic sunny structure. The meta is questioning it, probably because there's many things RCG wants to do that would go against this. Just like the Shelley arc in s15, after all.

In the end, the characters are allowed to understand each other, looking each other in the eyes as the circle of life plays.

The Gang Solves Global Warming

Talk of an imminent crisis. People are gonna revolt soon (like the audience for Thundergun), and the bar (which has often been used as meta to represent the show) doesn't have enough resources to accomodate everyone.

"We didn't have enough to accommodate the people that were here before, and now it seems like we've doubled in size and we just don't have enough."

"Where is your God now?"

"He will reveal himself at some point."

"Oh. Well, is he gonna do it before all these people revolt and destroy the place?"

"I don't know, Frank. I don't question God's will. If he wants to destroy the Earth, that's on him. I support it!"

Could refer to both RCG's burnout as well as not having enough time. Either way, it leads to disaster.

Mac talks about God's plan, something that is predetermined and thus cannot be changed.

"Guys, we don't really have to worry about global warming, because... yes, is the Earth getting unbearably hot? Of course it is. But it's all a part of God's plan. Look, if God wants to roast us like turkeys, there's got to be a good reason for it."

Mac acknowledges that the plan that is locked in is leading to a horrible unbearable outcome, but still insists there's nothing they can do to change that ending.

"See? It's all a part of his divine plan, Dennis. And that's locked in, so we're good."

"Okay, so all we have to do is nothing?"

"No. No, because... we have free will, Dennis, which means that we have to take the necessary steps to make sure that that plan comes to fruition."

"Which is predetermined."

"Yes."

"But it doesn't matter what we do if it's all predetermined. You see how your argument... doesn't make any sense?"

Just like the structure, this plan doesn't allow the characters to change anything, and it only leads to eventual doom. Or imminent death.

Paddy's Has a Jumper

There is a man who wants to end his own life on the roof of Paddy's, and the gang uses an algorithm to try to determine whether they should do something about it.

So there is a threat of imminent death, and through the algorithm (like the structure), they have to decide how to proceed, only the algorithm eventually leads them down a path they are not fully comfortable with, pushing Bryan off of the roof.

The episode starts with them watching an episode of a show on TV, and being surprised by a twist (a marriage proposal... thinking of dennis' shell that can only be broken by marriage... anyways). The algorithm decided they would like this show, but we learn at the end that they didn't (once again, the audience revolting, whether it be thundergun fans or patrons at the bar).

At the same time, it's repeated that this algorithm takes the emotions out of decisions:

"So, guys, I think I have a way that we can solve this argument without human emotion mucking it all up."

"I don't need your opinions. Okay? 'Cause based on the analytical conclusions that we draw here, we're gonna be able to come up with a mathematically-accurate, non-emotional answer to all of our questions. Okay? We just need to think like a computer."

"Well, it still feels a little weird, but feelings are irrelevant in the face of facts. Is that what I'm hearing? The feelings... feelings just get in the way."

I remember when this episode aired, people interpreted Cricket getting the casaba melon in the end as David Hornsby writing the finale of the season, Big Mo. The casaba representing the show, plus the talk of "helping Bryan die" and "crashing the casaba melon" with him catching it sounded a lot like "ending sunny", which plays both into Big Mo tricking us into thinking sunny was ending, and later acting like the finale to classic sunny. One last season following the old structure before RCG allows themselves to change things up in way that could be risky in fan reception.

This whole episode, with the discussion on Bryan, the egg, and the casaba, reads like RCG deciding on what to do with the show. Do we end it? Do we change it? What makes the most sense vs what do we want to do?

"And then we could be known as a suicide bar, and that's no good." "I don't want to be that." "Yeah, kind of grim." "I'd probably take my business elsewhere." "You don't have business." "What, uh, what if you lean into that, though?" "Like, you don't make it grim, but you make it playful."

This decision they keep hinting at could shift the tone of the show forever, and potentially "drive away business".

So they want to try to decide on it by sticking to what works mathematically, in this case the algorithm, however... it doesn't reflect their feelings.

"Uh, yeah, I know, but mathematically we were supposed to kill a man today."

"Maybe that's, like, part of the problem of, like, taking the humanity out of decisions."

"Perhaps the science just isn't there yet."

When it comes to exploring the canon of sunny, there is a lot that, if the normal sunny structure were to be used, would never be explored in an emotionally satisfying way, which is what RCG ultimately wants to do. I remember when Mac Finds His Pride first came out, Rob kept insisting "the characters change, but they don't evolve", and when faced with so much criticism about the episode not feeling like sunny, he answered that "he decides what feels like sunny, because he's the writer".

I quote:

"What was the reaction like to your epic dance number in the season 13 finale?

MCELHENNEY: It was both negative and positive, which is one of those things we talked about. It’s great to surprise people and have them not have any idea what we’re doing and why we’re doing it. I have people saying, “Oh my God, I love this, it’s one of the best things you’ve ever done,” and then I have other people saying, “You’ve destroyed my show, you’ve ruined it.” And I’m like, “Great!” That’s exactly what we should be doing on the show, is we should be destroying somebody’s idea of what Sunny is on a regular basis. OLSON: It was kind of weird just how many people would just blatantly comment on his body and to me, and we were like, “What would happen if they were commenting on my body to you? Like, ‘Ahh, Kaitlin’s chest…’” MCELHENNEY: A lot of people didn’t like it. Because a lot of people felt like it didn’t fit into the lexicon of what the show is. And I can’t say that they’re wrong, but the difference is that I get to dictate what the lexicon is and they don’t, and that’s a part of the experience."

This episode is also where a lot of explosion talk happens, with Mac and Dennis mentioning they crave it, and the way they want to reach it is by destroying the casaba melon (which as we've established represents sunny).

In the end, it's discovered it's where Frank hides his weed ("I don't think you have to hide it, man"), and Frank reveals it's also "full of loads".

A Woman's Right To Chop

An episode fully about choices and their perceived life altering consequences. Dennis and the rest of the boys want to control what other women decide to do with their hair, Dee defends their right to do it. There's talk of tradition and "upsetting the natural balance of things". The tradition thing will be brought up again in the finale of s15.

I wonder if Poppins could also be considered a metaphor for the show itself. Very old, but full of potential new life that, if let out, could kill them.

Either way:

(Talking of Keri Russell) "Millions of adoring fans, hit television show, you know, and then she went and did this." "Shocking, isn't it? With this one tragic decision, Keri Russell alienated all of her fans, she got her show canceled, and man, she was never heard of ever again."

Frank's talk about cutting all of his hair and losing it forever due to this drastic decision also fits. Burping from his backed up valve due to missing what he lost, the hair that never grew back ("And you're not just giving up being at the top of the leaderboard at some, you know, laser-amusement-themed park, man, you're talking about giving up everything. Everything. Everything we built. Everything we worked so hard for.").

Waiting for Big Mo

And we're finally at the finale for season 14. This episode was structured to trick the audience into thinking the series was ending with its walking out. Not only that, but it's a key episode for meta interpretation of these two seasons.

"Time to end the game" echoes Escapes' "And so the game begins". Because it references the same thing, the game being the show itself.

This is reinforced by the gang saying "it feels like they've been playing it forever", "they never win anything" and that "they get to go crazy at the end of it".

But if the game is sunny, what is the base they're trying to defend? That is the structure.

"Just guard the base, man."

"Kind of sick and tired of guarding the base. What if we go out there, run around? I want to go out there and have some fun, man."

"We gotta guard the base. That's what we always do, and that's what we figured out works a long time ago. Plus, we're waiting for Big Mo."

Dennis is desperate to hold the base and protect it because it's what they've always done, and because Big Mo is threatening to take their place on the leaderboard.

If they were to go out, run around and explore, they would go down the leaderboard, and that is exactly what happens.

"Oh, Charlie, you got to get out there with us. It's so fun. We're finding all kinds of corners of this place that we've never explored before."

"Yeah, I'd love to, I really would, but we're actually... we're losing right now."

An article from season 13 times about "Mac Finds His Pride" reads:

“Some of the uncharted waters, if you want to call them that, were genuine emotion,” Day said on a 2018 Television Critics Association panel. “Once we stumbled on the episode becoming more about Frank being more tolerant and accepting something, we thought, well, this is something we haven’t really done. Our characters rarely change or learn.”

To me, this dissatisfaction is something they felt for a while, and the first time they started really having fun with it again was when they decided to have Mac come out, in Hero or hate crime specifically. That is, because until then, the characters being incapable of change was part of the structure of the show. Something that allowed no wiggle room. But the audience making themselves heard after Goes to hell came out showed them it didn't have to be that way, necessarily.

It didn't come without struggle though, this interview from TheWrap reads:

GLENN HOWERTON: "He’s out (Mac). It’s definitely a big deal for us. I never thought we would do that. … I was against it at first, and the reason I was against it was his character has always been an opportunity to satirize a particular attitude, that still sadly exists, that there’s something wrong with being gay. And I think that it was important to me at least to maintain that level of social satire which is such a big part of the show to me: taking an attitude, taking a point of view that exists in our society, and giving it to one of our characters and sort of blowing it out of proportion. Watching the inevitable outcome of the most extreme version of that point of view. That’s always been my M.O. in terms of the writing of the characters. And to me there was always such a darkly comical and sad element to having this character continue to deny his own sexuality because of the societal pressures that he put on himself… that he had internalized. So I never wanted him to come out of the closet because I thought that to me is… showing just how deep that mentality goes. And despite all the evidence and despite all the support of his friends, the man will still continue to deny his sexual orientation. But then I got to a point where I realized, I’m holding too hard and fast to that rule. And I think we have made plenty of jokes in that arena. We’ve satirized that to death. What sort of possibilities does it open up when that character finally does come out of the closet? Which is why we decided to have him come out once and for all."

Mac coming out forced RCG to reassess to which level the characters were in fact allowed to change.

This article from 2019 has him saying:

“we wanted to make sure that even though the characters might change, they don’t evolve. We wanted to make sure that he (Mac) doesn’t become a better person or a sweeter person or more endearing person or a nicer person. We felt like we wanted to still keep the tone. So I would say, in all the right ways, things remain exactly the same.”

And the amount of change the show as a whole was allowed was something they've grappled since, and something I'm pretty sure caused Dennis Double Life (I mean, Dennis being mindnumbingly bored at how everything stays exactly the same - like his own apartment - but running away at the possibility of change, with the RPG "on the table"...).

Anyway, during the whole episode, the others keep wanting to quit the game for good, because the way Dennis is making them play is miserable, and they'll only be allowed to have fun at the end.

"I actually got an idea. Like, what if you guys don't play the game up in the air ducts this time, but you go down on the floor? Where everyone's having all the fun?"

"They look like they're having so much fun playing laser ta..."

"Will you shut up?! This isn't about having fun. Okay? This is about staying alive and winning."

Dennis (in true double life fashion from him...) places this dilemma like an impossible choice: either you stay alive, miserable, and win, OR you have fun and eventually Big Mo (imminent death) gets you, and you're forgotten. He doesn't see the answer in the middle, which Charlie is quick to point out: playing the game AND having fun with it, not caring how it affects "how well they're doing".

Eventually Dennis learns about what really happened to Larry Takashi (aka Larry David), and the whole gang, for a moment, agrees to "end the game", aka end the show. This was obviously a fake show ending, finishing with them saying "they're never going anywhere". But why is that? Because instead of guarding the base, they decided to play by their own rules.

As such, Big Mo still acts like a show finale, to what Sunny was prior to this decision.

This brings us to...

Season 15

Introduced with the trailer description as "new era, same egos",

Predictably, this season ends up "breaking the bounds" of philly, to travel all the way to Ireland. As Big Mo had announced, they "went out to explore"... but literally.

What happens next is the natural first step of exploration, aka reassessing your own identity.

Season 15 isn't the "franchise rebooted" just yet, it is experimentation. Experimenting with how far they can push things, getting comfortable with the new structure (of a season arc, and otherwise).

With an end comes a new beginning, and a question, what is sunny now?

So, the theme of identity touches every single character on its own, each with their personalized arc that ends with the character coming out changed in some way. This is why to me season 15 is transitional. The show, the characters, are finding new footing. This is especially true for Dennis, whose character has been intrinsically linked to sunny meta for a while now, but I can't fully get into that here (or I would derail the section. I get into it later a bit. also I have gotten into it before tho, though the post is slightly old so some parts may not hold up).

Some characters attempt to cling to their roots, others run from it.

All in all, this season challenges each character on one fragment that always defined their identity, and has them come out of it with a new understanding.

As a matter of fact, this is, to me, the first season where all the characters are actually allowed to develop.

Trying to keep to the point before we get into each episode, here is the arc that each character goes through:

MAC: At first, he is compartmentalizing his own identity. Depending on what he feels is the dominant one, he feels he has to act accordingly, and every single decision is dictated by this. He places great importance on his irish roots, when all of a sudden, this belief is challenged when it is "discovered" that he's "actually dutch". This sends Mac into a spiral, trying to determine what really defines him now that his roots are out of the question. He can't reconcile the fact that different aspects can coexist in a singe person, hyperfocusing on one at a time. Until it's revealed in the finale that he is in fact irish, and Dennis and Charlie tricked him. ("So you thought you'd just unravel my entire identity?" "Nothing's unraveled! We didn't unravel anything! You're still you! You've always been you!"). So what does Mac gain from this arc? Another shamrock tattoo... no, I'm kidding, he gains security in his own identity outside of outside validation. For a moment he experienced what it was like to have everything you thought you knew about yourself be shattered, and what it gave him was an awareness that you're still you even in the face of change, and a determination to stand his ground. All in all, to me, his character is the one who actually changed the least (makes it counterproductive that I'd talk about him first...), which is why season 15 throws him for a loop. RCG already had him where they wanted as far as development goes at the start, due to the fact he was allowed to develop in past seasons as well, so what they did instead was bring him back to a previous point, reawakening his insecurity in his identity. He thought he knew pretty well who he was, until he didn't. And then he's sure again. What this did was have him see that it really didn't matter in the end, he was always him. Another thing this arc did was set him free from his dad's shadow for a moment, as he got another last name. That's because, as the gelled back hair would remind you, he's always looked up to and wanted to prove himself to his father. As MFHP marks the climactic point of Mac trying desperately to have his dad understand his identity, and failing, Jumper shows us that he still thinks of his name in a positive light or at least tries to defend it still ("My dad's name is an homage."), like he's still in denial. In a way, by assigning him the Vandross last name for a while, he was allowed to cut ties with his own name and exist as someone else, only to come to the conclusion that nothing really changed about himself, and he shouldn't stress about identity so much.

DENNIS: In many ways, Dennis' arc is the foil to Mac's. Unlike Mac, Dennis doesn't want to hear a single thing about identity. He doesn't think it should play a role in the decisions you make at all, in fact he thinks no action you take can ever define your identity, and you are whatever the hell you say you are, regardless of where your heart's taking you. Now, on some level, his argument may appear reasonable, or at least more grounded than Mac's. It's true, "Identity doesn't have to factor into absolutely every decision you make.", and you do have power over how you define yourself at the end of the day. Dennis being Dennis, however, we all know the extreme to which he's taking this. He is drowning in denial. Refusing to accept reality at every turn. He doesn't have covid, he's just allergic to sheep wool, and the castle looks great, it's not decrepit. So, Dennis starts the arc with one main ambition: have an authentic experience. He's obsessed with things being true, being tampered with. This is also a season theme, in general (the burning of the shredded documents for example), which again plays into how Dennis meta is almost always show meta as well, but I digress. He forces himself to do things the european way, effectively running away from his roots entirely. The opposite of Mac. Throughout the season however, things escalate. He gets worse, and he starts doing things the old way regardless (like driving the wrong, but right for him in philly, side of the road). It reads like he's trying to negate his actual authentic nature, while being driven insane by the perception of others doing this as well. He wants things to feel authentic, he just can't figure out how, because he can't see as he's blinded by all the denial that's literally almost killing him (you could say he's been trying to pull the wool over our eyes...). It's hard to define in this arc which exact aspect of his identity is challenged, because it's all of them. As the finale states, his whole "essence" is broken, his back, you know, the structural foundation of every person, ("You've always said that your back has the symmetry of the Vitruvian man, and it's the foundation of your structural essence.") the structure of the show, the structure of Dennis. This is another way in which it is a foil to Mac, as he is already secure and open about who he is exactly, while Dennis denies all of it. They're like opposite extremes for how to tackle the structure, and the answer of course lies in the middle. (wink. see I told you it's impossible to write impartial sunny meta, because macden is intrinsic to it... anyway). By the end of his arc however! Dennis has admitted to himself that he had covid. Almost dying from sheer denial gave him enough of a scare to cut that out, if you will, and I can't tell you what the new Dennis will be like or what he has gained besides the lack (or decrease) of denial, because his change is the most fundamental. He will probably be further redefined in season 16. All his identity was impacted.

DEE: This one's easy, what is something that has always defined Dee's identity, to everyone and herself? (Clip Show: "Dee, are you a successful actress?" "Oh, I could have been." "Dee, be serious! Yes or no?" "No.") Since always, she has wanted to be an actress. Finally, she gets the once in a lifetime opportunity to be just that. Earlier in the season, it is hinted especially with her acting classes that what he really wants is to have power and control. This of course echoes what we've seen of her in season 14 (and prior), she comes up with the plans, pulls the strings, prefers to be the director. However, what does an actor do? Follow orders and directions. Previously, she fell into this role due to her search for validation. This is shown with her literally begging the director to have a role. Her arc shifts her character from looking for others' directions, permission and validation to gaining agency (which even echoes thundergun 4! "So, you... you want the female characters to have less agency?") by crushing the possibility of her becoming an actor, her last chance, all the while showing her how miserable it truly is to have to follow everyone else's lead. Anyway, now that the actor fragment of her identity is put to rest, she is free to redefine herself and take charge. Additionally, Sinks in a Bog may have also started a thread to redefine the way she sees female allyship, in fact I think it was the central theme of the episode for her. Thinking back to Making Paddy's Great Again, she was willing to get rid of a perfectly fine new gang member in favor of Dennis, just because she was a woman which made her feel threatened. In Thundergun 4, similarly, she feels threatened by the new female character, and wants other women to be below her, is always in competition with them. Bog puts her in a situation of need where only the Waitress, another woman, can help her. In the end, she lets the Waitress sink in order to get out, but the episode still forces Dee to face a situation in which women working together is the only viable way to get out of trouble. I don't think this specific arc is finished yet for her, but I wanted to mention it still.

FRANK: Another easy one. Thanks to MFHP and the discussion surrounding it by RCG, we know that the role of Frank in the gang is that of surrogate father. However, just because we the audience know, does not mean he does. Frank as a character dismisses responsibilities such as "being a dad". He may show the occasional tender affection towards Charlie, but those moments are far in-between, and when asked if he's Charlie father, he has run from it in the past. We, like him probably, always assumed in the end that he was indeed Charlie's biological dad, despite the lack of test. Season 15, of course, puts a wrench in all of this. This is the fragment of Frank's identity that gets challenged, his fatherhood. Not just to Charlie, but to Dennis as well, which he ends up treating as a "rebound son" and bonding with while he is separated from Charlie. Frank has always kept people at a distance, and almost losing Charlie reminds him to treasure what you have, otherwise you run the risk of losing it. By the end of the season he's almost flipped, in that he is willing to show Charlie that he is "useful", to make himself worthy of being in his life, instead of expecting it. What he gained, in my opinion, is feeling comfortable with the idea of being a father. Actually wanting it. Finally stepping into the role of "the gang's surrogate dad" that has been preannounced ever since MFHP. So that's how his identity was impacted. Not saying he's gonna become dad of the year, just that he's now open to seeing of himself as a dad at all.

CHARLIE: He is the protagonist of the season, the one that gets to have the big emotional beat of the finale, and as such I've left him for last here, because there's more to chew on. Charlie isn't setting out to do anything when he arrives in Ireland. He's pretty content in how things are and who he is, he's just along for the ride... or so he thinks. By finding out the existence of his actual biological dad and meeting him, he is confronted with a whole world of... everything he's ever wanted. Suddenly, what he had before doesn't cut it anymore. He wasn't looking for this, but as he stumbles on it, he realizes quickly that it's everything he's been missing out on his whole life. He wants to start fresh with his dad, wants to learn more about his roots, he is ready to abandon the life he thought he was content in, because he sees how incomplete it actually was. Only... that's not how life works. You cannot alter the past. You can only impact the future. ("The first time round is a bitter pill, but the second chance is better still") He cannot make up for all the lost time and chances, because his dad dies. ("You weren't there! And I needed you! I needed you there. You were supposed to carry me!") The finale says it best: "I'm glad you're dead. Now I don't have to spend the rest of my life waiting for you to pick me up." Charlie, like Dee, is allowed to move on from a fragment of his identity that was weighting him down. He's allowed to let go of his need to know who his real dad is, and is rewarded with the knowledge that he does have people who care for him despite everything. His identity is thus also redefined: he's no longer waiting to know who his "real" dad is, because he knows what makes family real.

In a way, this is the "Big Mo" we'd been waiting for. Despite the apparent negative outcome of the trip overall, the team underwent successful arcs that ended with them all together in the bar, deciding to go back up there on that mountain and help Charlie finish the job ("No hesitation, no surrender, no man left behind!"). Just like a sports team getting "in the zone" and starting a winning streak by working together really well.

So, lets get into the episodes.

2020: A Year in Review

Talk of wanting to set off fireworks in the bar to celebrate.

Obviously, this refers to how sunny passed the record as longest running sitcom with its fifteenth season, but let's also look at the dialogue:

"What if we let off some fireworks in here, huh?"

"Fireworks in the bar?"

"It's never been done before. Right? That could be kind of good, right?"

"You'll burn the place to the ground."

The kind of explosion Charlie wants to set off because "it's never been done before" (echoing Big Mo... exploring new things) could potentially destroy the bar... which, as always, is a metaphor for the show.

The evergreen bar = show metaphor doesn't stop here however.

The gang is expecting a "huge potential investor" and they're gonna try to ask him for a loan for Paddy's pub.

In the past year they've asked for, and gotten, plenty of them for their own little side ventures/failing businesses, and now they want one for their main thing, the bar.

He's not there to give out PPP loans though, what the guy is actually there to do is collect on the ones already given.

Here's how I interpret this. Think of every season a show is given, as a small loan of a set number of episodes that they will then use to tell their story.

Throughout the years, sunny has been given plenty of these, and rarely has it used them to explore a lot of canon, because of the structure of the show that didn't really allow for it.

This is the same sentiment as Escapes, the fear of not being allowed more time, more seasons, to actually do all the stuff they want to do, that they were saving for "the end".

Because as the man hears all the ways in which they have wasted the previous given loans, he obviously doesn't give them another one for their actual main business venture.

So, Mac and Dennis decide to get involved with the election, and as such their loan is for tactical gear, but they end up getting sidetracked entirely, running their own separate poll where people get to vote, while also getting back to their initial thing of singing together.

"Now, the labeling... in hindsight, was a bit obtuse and created a great deal of confusion."

"It kind of backed up the whole system."

"Right. Yeah, there was a whole kerfuffle... I don't know if you remember this... about, like, what votes were supposed to be counted and what votes aren't gonna be counted. And are these legitimate votes, are these not legitimate votes? What's this, what's that? I mean, we put our boxes all over the damn place. So, you know, we created a mess."

This ep also has the whole running out of materials thing that Global Warming did for when Charlie and Dee are making masks and it's hard to meet the demand.

"Um, so, hey, listen, um, listen, we really do believe that with a major cash infusion, we could turn this bar into something..."

"No, no, no."

"...even more successful than it already..."

Thankfully, as we've covered, they managed to get four seasons, I'd say that's a pretty big loan that can only be justified if you have some sort of plan... to "turn this show into something even more successful than it already is".

Or perhaps just to do something so altering that it's potentially show ending, without the fear of getting cancelled immediately.

The Gang Makes Lethal Weapon 7

As this episode has the gang directing a set, it's easy for some elements to mirror the making of sunny, as that's the intended thing in the first place. (stuff like "We could make this more of an art house film. I'm open to it.", whereas in Thundergun 4, their role was that of the audience, which is why there Mac goes "I hope they don't show us some boring art house movie.").

There's talk of a big bang, "I'm sick of getting jerked around, I'm ready to explode".

They start to redefine who the "villain" of the story actually is, something that will also come up later in Mac's discussions about God with Gus. The concept of a vengeful God set out to send a catastrophe to smite and punish them. Like Global Warming. An imminent death, in this case in the form of a tidal wave, an act of God.

I think it's interesting how throughout these seasons, this talk of a "big event", an explosion, is both talked of as a huge catastrophe, yet something that is deeply craved.

Reminds me of Chop, again:

"They're clearly bored and lonely and needing to do something extreme in order to make themselves feel special." "Take this one for example. You don't get a monkey cut like that unless you're broken inside."

A chop, an action that's so drastic it could potentially destroy everything they've built...

"Out of the smoldering ashes, however, I pieced together a cautionary tale. An exploration, not of what is gained by learning, but of what is lost by staying ignorant."

They can't change the past (the first time round is a bitter pill), but they can embrace the future (the second chance is better still), taking what feels like "smoldering ashes" and exploring the lost potential that staying ignorant left them with. In the case of season 15, Charlie couldn't stay with his father and all he was left with was the missed chances ("You weren't there! And I needed you! I needed you there. You were supposed to carry me!"), but in the midst of this, Frank learned the importance of his role as a father (and then we find new seeds to sow, to grow our love we didn't know).

The Gang Buys A Roller Rink

As always, the bar = show metaphor makes a reappearance.

This one is packed, but to summarize, this as well is about falling back in love with something. Or rather... the first half of it. The falling out.

Imagine you've been with something your whole life, you start forgetting why you kept choosing it to stay in your life (reminds me of dennis being asked by he lives with mac in clip show...), you slowly grow bored of it as you realize that it has never changed. You've kept it exactly the same.

You think that means something has to change, something has to give.

You fantasize about how different things could be... that's the roller rink. The roller rink serves the same purpose as them going to Ireland... going as far away from their base as possible, because of this need for change.

Except...

"Don't it always seem to go That you don't know what you got 'til it's gone? They paved paradise and put up a parking lot"

Once again, the implication being that they stuck with it for so long for a reason. The show, that is. Or the bar.

But that's not all this episode talks about to me.

Because it shows the gang acting very uncharacteristically, especially in regards to Dee.

"You know, Dennis looks like Jerry Seinfeld."

"Thanks, man. Yeah, that's kind of what I was going for."

"I don't like how mean they are to each other on that show."

"Aw, Sweet Dee. So pure of heart. You know?"

"Hey, when you going to Hollywood, Dee?"

"Tomorrow. Yeah, this is my last night in Philly. I'm actually super nervous."

"Oh, you got nothing to be nervous about."

"No, you're gonna do great out there, sis. They're gonna love you. You just have so much natural charisma, and you're so funny."

"Such a good-hearted person. Guys, thank you so much for not making fun of the size of her feet. They're very big."

"Oh, no, dude. I would never make fun of her physical attributes."

"Look at her go, man."

"Yeah, she's really flying, huh? Imagine if she didn't have to slow down for her friends."

"She doesn't have to. No, no, no. I... When she asked me to tighten her skates, I secretly loosened them, you know, 'cause real friends don't slow each other down, right? They help them soar."

These are all very "unsunny" moments typically ("I need their aggression at a ten"), especially in the context of the episode where we're meant to read the roller rink stuff kind of as anti-sunny... but something sticks out to me, and it's the last example I brought up.

Normally, it wouldn't fit the sunny structure, and yet we know that's not true, or at least... not anymore. Not always. They did come back for Charlie in the finale.

This is also lampshaded in Goes to Ireland:

"That's exactly what we did."

"Because we wanted to be supportive."

"No, you didn't!"

"Because we are always there for each other."

"No, we're not!"

"Right, guys?"

"In good times and in bad."

It's possible that's one way in which the previous structure didn't allow RCG to do what they really wanted to. Because the gang is not supposed to be there for each other normally, we know this, and yet it's been happening more and more in recent seasons.

Anyway, by having the roller rink part feel so unlike sunny, I think it's yet again addressing this fear that changing too much could lead them to... that. To straying too far away from what they had, only to find out it was already perfect.

Not to mention, they only get into this discussion at all because they just found out the roller rink is closing down.

"I mean, you know, doesn't quite have the same pageantry as a roller rink, but, uh..."

"Well, there's a palpable sadness in here."

This concept of pageantry coming back from A year in review.

"This guy's a huge potential investor. He could give Paddy's tons of money."

"I know, we need pageantry. We need, uh..."

So in a way, its closing down reminds the gang of all the lost potential, of their initial dreams, reminds them of all the things they said they'd do with the place.

This concept of potential... is something that I feel comes up a lot too. Whether it's the potential of new life with the puppies and the seeds, or something more abstract like them looking at Paddy's ("But that said, I mean, you know, it's got potential. It doesn't have to be this, right? We could gut this place, make it totally our own, right?").

The Gang Replaces Dee With A Monkey

Sigh. This one starts really on the nose.

"No. No, no. This can't be happening. I-I-I'm too young. No, why are you doing this? I don't want to change. I don't want to change. Oh, God, it's hot. It's always so goddamn hot. Someone's got to crack a door or a window. Oh, God, no. It's all happening too fast. I had plans, and they were perfect plans. This is just all too soon!"

We start the episode with, again, change, that is leading to losing something, running out of time.

Anyway, talk about wanting to go out, to experiment, and yet again the gang talking about where to go and trying to decide looks a lot like how a decision would be made inside a writer's room. Down to the use of a whiteboard, actually.

Now, about the monkey.

"See? Great, huh?"

"No. No, not great. Ridiculous. You think a monkey can run a bar?"

"Run a bar?"

"It would be great if we could hire more monkeys to do our job for us while we're gone. Like, a team of monkeys who run the bar, you know what I mean?"

"I do have to admit, though, it-it is a little disappointing to, um, discover that a team of primates could do our jobs for us, but..."

To me it sounds like the over reliance on a predetermined system, when writing, often lead to a feeling that RCG's own input wasn't as needed to make decisions, because they already know what works. To the point that a monkey could do their job. In a way, like the algorithm.

"And, uh, everybody write down a destination on the napkin, and then we'll put that destination in this bowl right here, I'll pick one out, and that way not one of us decides ...but we let fate take over. What do you guys think about that plan?"

They are... once again, in the position of having to take a decision. Like Escapes, getting lost in the specifics because they can't agree on them.

Unlike the previous examples however, this is suggesting the complete opposite approach to using a structure.

And it continues:

"You know what, guys? I'm having a lot of fun here. Uh, but I do want to figure this out, so, new plan. All right, here's what we're gonna do. Instead of writing down places, why don't we write down key words? Or phrases, you know? Let's go with our instincts, you know? Whatever we want to feel, whatever we want to experience on the vacation, okay? And then we'll put it up on a board. We'll look at it all together and then maybe the destination will just reveal itself to us."

Like the anti-algorithm, which took emotions out of the equation, this method instead prioritizes them in decisions. And much like Dee Day, the boys took the complicated route, Dee took the simpler one, but they all ended up on the same outcome. Ireland.

Another thing that season 15 introduces...

"You're just being honest about how you feel."

The theme of feelings is now accompanied by that of honesty, of authenticity.

"You're making me realize something here. Maybe this doesn't have to be a scam. What I mean is, [...] I can control you. I can make you feel however I want you to feel, which will help you be a better actor. [...] Oh, that's real power. Way more power than just acting, and I think that's what it was probably all about for me, you know? I just... I was searching for a sense of control."

And of control. People often do something drastic to look for a sense of control.

"And if we can't stop them from making stupid and selfish choices, then we need to give them a place to go to be stupid and selfish." (Chop)

The experimentation, the exploration of feelings, that's what they really wanted.

"You weren't looking for the gay thing. But it gave you a sense of something bigger than yourself."

Something that makes writing sunny exciting... the ability to make us feel whatever they want. By embracing feelings.

But what has authenticity got to do with all this? Well, whatever it is that they're planning to do, something drastic and potentially catastrophic, I think there was genuine fear that it wouldn't be authentic to the show. That it would stray too far.

Think once again of the algorithm.

First, they had to decide if it was something feasible... Something they can actually pull off (Could he?). Then, they had to decide if it was something that would actually happen, within the show (Would he?). And finally, they had to decide if they actually wanted to go through with it (Should we?).

This method was supposed to determine if something fits the canon of sunny, and thus is allowed to be written in.

For this specific thing that seems to trip them up (rolling my eyes because I'm trying to be unbiased here but... come on. well either way, it works for many decisions, like charlie's father, for example), perhaps they kept getting stuck in each of those points of the algorithm, putting it off season after season, without realizing their feelings on the matter, regarding what they really want to do.

The fear of causing sunny's death by going too far (perhaps jumping the shark) started to turn into the desire to end sunny to get to the good stuff that lies at the end quicker... until realization hit. Why end it at all? Why not just... risk it?

So... Ireland.

The Ireland Arc

I think, for the sake of my own convenience, I will treat the Ireland episodes as one big section, because I can't address them separately.

"What did you want me to do, Dee? Did you want me to rent a big obnoxious American truck like that one over there? That's exactly what we're trying to get away from. Okay, you know, the tiny car, that's all part of the charm of-of Europe. You know, like driving on the left-hand side of the road. Dangerous for Americans like you. But, you know, it's authentic and that's what I want, that's what I'm going for. An authentic Irish..."

Dennis is looking for an authentic irish experience. This, to him, includes driving a tiny car, something that's actually clearly causing discomfort to everyone. This will repeat a lot. What he's actually doing, is straying further from his true american nature.

Learning, eventually, to fall back in love with it by the end, because "We are America, sweetheart! And we carry our country with us wherever we go. Because we love her! And when you love someone, you can't bear to leave 'em behind!". I think this phrase, in particular, shows the ultimate acceptance that the gang loves each other, and it's therefore not inauthentic to sunny that they would be there for each other sometimes. It is, in fact, part of its identity. And it always has been.

Anyway, in The Gang Goes To Ireland, eventually we arrive to a cat who has died because it got stuck inside the room of Frank Fluids' headquarters.

Frank is here however to get his hands on some documents, that he needs to shred in order to cover up a lot of evidence for past events.

At the same time, Dee arrives and Dennis reveals having experience "covering up blunt force trauma", so he helps her out by redistributing the blood on her forehead.

So, they are all examples of what can happen if you let structure control you. You can end up occulting the truth in the process. Covering up the past, "repressing" the blood... letting something that's otherwise glaring go unchecked and actively hiding it. And in fact, Dennis can't smell the dead cat.

Something has gone obviously wrong by getting stuck in the room (Escapes...), and everyone else can instantly smell it except for him, because the covid prevented him from sensing the authentic smell.

To extend this though... it prevented him from seeing reality as a whole. That's why he started hallucinating, why he complained about wool, because he couldn't accept reality. And by being unable to accept reality, he couldn't experience it around him. Couldn't sense the smell of the cat, of the hair...

Still, we see s15 change things up with the canon that they probably wouldn't have done before. Charlie being able to read gaelic, for one.

"I'm gonna kill myself, Frank." "He's not really gonna do it, dude, he's just being dramatic." "Do it, bitch!" "Yeah, do it, bitch." "I'm not really gonna do it. It's just a cry for help."

Paralleling Jumper, and thus the whole "wanting to end the show just to be able to go crazy with it". Chop too...

Another thing from Chop that returns here... when Mac thought "Poppins" was sleepy and tried to jumpstart their system with the air horn. Same concept as here with the stew.

"This stew is really doing it for me now."

"Well, yeah, 'cause you're using it as food, instead of using it as a reviving mechanism."

The problem being expressed here, is that it was never about the show not being fun to do anymore per se (comparing it, for example, to a dead body you have to carry up a mountain), but rather that there was a lot of potential stuck inside that was unaccounted for. In the case of "Poppins", all the puppies. The dog was pregnant, not sleepy. In the case of the stew, they were using it to throw it in people's faces or wake them up from having passed out, and not... as food.

Anyway, the gang meets up at Patty's, yet again showing that despite being all the way in Ireland, deep down they miss home, since they picked basically the irish copy of Paddy's to hang in.

Finally, in The Gang's Still in Ireland, we're introduced to the castle.

To me... the castle represents sunny (unsurprisingly, since I'm analyzing the meta about writing sunny).

"Dee, I haven't even begun to do half the things I want to do with this castle. Now you're asking me to leave?"

Dennis insists the castle is perfect, despite the fact it's falling apart.

"Whoa. This place has a dark past. Murder, betrayal, beheadings."

"Well, you know, it's a castle, Dee. You know, people were going crazy in castles all the time. And beheading people... that was just their way of solving problems back then, you know."

Reminds me of Mac's comments towards Paddy's at the end of roller rink, palpable sadness and all that, also Big Mo with the whole "getting to go crazy" at the end. The boldened part makes me think of the old structure. The old structure dictated all the darkness and didn't allow space for exploring something in a genuine way. The old structure demands the use of the murder hole.

Dennis follows the castle's instructions, which drive him further into denial and to act unlike himsels, almost possessed. He hides behinds the painting, which to me symbolizes subtext ("I think there's another man in this room."), but in the end falls out, which follows the meta of the seeds as well, in the sense that Frank is able to get them out of his throat.

About the seeds.

"The first time round is a bitter pill

But the second chance is better still

And then we find new seeds to sow

To grow our love we didn't know"

You could think of the new era as a second chance. But perhaps it applies to the characters as well. Perhaps this plays into God being merciful (more on this later).

The point being, there was a lot of unexplored potential, of lost chances, and by embracing that instead of getting bogged down, they'll be able to build something new. Even if they have to destroy some things for it (Thundergun 4), like the established canon, or the set rules. To fall back in love with the show, by embracing the emotional side of it.

Charlie's reaction to Frank getting the seed out could mimic the audience. Getting a seed unstuck doesn't guarantee that everyone will be onboard.

"I found you, seed. Look at it. I coughed it out."

"Yeah. Gross. Yeah."

"Oh. I thought you'd be happy for me."

Frank proposes he should swallow it back because it would be funny, because that was the old way of doing things and making jokes. The gang never learning as per the structure stopped them from delving deeper. But they don't care about audience reaction anymore ("we'll jam it down their throats till they enjoy it!" "we'll force them to like it!").

"Walking this path is a serious commitment. One that requires considerable training."

"Oh, Father, look, I've been S'ing and F'ing my way through life for far too long. I think it's time that I started sucking down the words of the Bible. And instead of looking for pieces of ass, I'd just look for peace."

"Well, your language leaves a bit to be desired, but your heart's in the right place."

Mac finds the same lesson in his time in the church.

"Many of the stories in the Bible are metaphors. Parables with lessons. Look, you're looking at this all wrong. The Bible is a guidepost. Interpretations can change over time. And so can the Church. Our God, the God we teach here, is a merciful God."

So if RCG is the God in question, then the message is one of mercy ("I'm gonna save you. Unlike you, I'm not a psychopath." "And like all great plays, this one is going to have a happy ending."), unlike the God in Global Warming and Lethal Weapon 7, a vengeful God that punishes its disciples ("to smite me for the urges that He gave me when I made the original sin of being born" ...kinda poetic, because RCG as God created them and made them act as they do, for the sole purpose of punishing them, having been created for this, and they don't really have a say in it).

Most shows also have what's called a "bible", although I remember RCG saying sunny doesn't, but it does have a canon and a structure, a set way that things work and have been done, and what's being argued here is that it should act more as a guide to follow when needed...

"You have urges that, traditionally, the Church has been very clear about. Well... I have those urges, too. [...] It's not uncommon. There's nothing wrong with it. It's who He made us. But our path, this path, is very clear. We must never act on those urges."

...And discarded when not needed. In Mac's case, him being gay, following this teaching from the bible would obviously be wrong.

Also, in general, we hear a lot of bell ringing in this season, both in the context of death (when the corpse is revealed, for example), but also whenever a scene with the church starts. Bells are usually rung only in funerals and weddings, so I thought that was another neat point to the overall themes.

Same goes for them using the song "Can't fight this feeling", that's all about... well, if you've read the lyrics you know. It's all about following your feelings...

The finale also places great importance on tradition, they have to carry the corpse that way because... that's the way things have always been done, that's tradition, that's the structure. But they don't end up carrying it, using a truck instead. Fulfilling the tradition and "sending him off with some dignity" but their own way, making things easier for themselves.

Death also keeps being a looming presence, in this case because of the curse of the banshee. It is said that when you see a banshee, "the end is near". And then death does hit, with Shelley. However, it wasn't the curse that did it, it was covid. The curse wasn't real.

But the corpse tells me something else, too.

"The poor guy's dying from a banshee curse, and now he's got to deal with COVID on top of everything else?"

The corpse is the show. This is important, because there is no death they have to fear. It is already dead. They've been trying to "jumpstart the system", with stew, with the air horn, but nothing they can do to the show can kill it more than how dead it already feels. The act of writing it the old way feeling like carrying a corpse up a mountain, an act so arduous each gang member keeps leaving, and the ones that stay ask for a break all the time.

This calls to mind the time Glenn actually left, and the part where Dennis trips and lets go seems to hint at this as well.

"Could it be maybe the banshee curse? Does it have something to do...?"

"Were you not carrying it?"

"Not carr... What are you talking about, man? Not carrying it? Yeah, I was carrying it."

"Why did it get lighter?"

"Oh, my God. It looks like he was dragging his feet back here."

"Were you hanging on it?"

"No!"

"He must have tripped and lost his grip, and that's how he fell."

"Oh, goddamn it! You were taking a ride? You weren't even holding it."

Seems to be mentioning the fact that Glenn didn't write any episode for season 13 after coming back.

When Mac stops carrying the corpse, the gang mentions that it feels like he was carrying a lot of weight, which to me refers to the most recent arcs being heavily Mac centric with his coming out, probably being the most exciting thing to write about, and thus "carrying" the corpse.

"Um, can I suggest something? What if we burn the body and carry the ashes up the hill?"

"Uh, guys, can I suggest something else? Uh, what if we, uh...? Now bear with me here. What if we chop the body up? Come on. And we carry it in pieces, right?"

"Look, this isn't working, okay? Look, you don't want to burn the guy? Fine. Personally, I don't understand it, but there are other solutions to this problem, okay? Let's just chop the body up. It's already mangled."

Dennis, despite initially insisting he "thinks it's awesome" to carry the body up the mountain, quickly starts getting fed up and trying to find alternative solutions. This probably reflects the reason why the seasons got shorter. A sentiment of burnout that they probably all felt.

The role of Dennis is crucial in this, and it cannot be overlooked. The moment his back is mentioned, especially as it's called his "structural essence", he's inevitably tied to the meta of the show as a whole because of the structure, meaning that breaking the show structure hinges on breaking Dennis' structure. This isn't the only moment this is implied, far from.

A few examples in quick succession, many of which I've already explored in my old post in more depth, some that will be new because they're from S15 (do allow me the freedom to bring into the discussion the concept of "love", that gets brought up a lot, and ties with the "embracing your feelings" I've dissected plenty already):

Dennis entering and exiting the structure in Gets Romantic ("So I'm still your leading man?"). Likewise, there's a lot of recasting talk in Lethal Weapon 7 and later with Dee in S15. Mirrors him leaving for ND as well.

Dennis being paralleled to Thundergun (he finds out he has a son, and in the end he "dies", / "So, this is the midpoint twist." "What is?" "Um, ThunderGun finding out he has a son." "He has a son?" "Yes." "But how is this the twist? I mean, because he's got a kid? I mean, he's probably got a thousand kids, all the raw-dog loads he drops." / "I say give me dong or give me death." / "You weren't looking for the gay thing. But it gave you a sense of something bigger than yourself.")

Dennis being forced by Dee to remove his make up in Dee Day ("Buddy, makeup or not, you are the Golden God. It's all about what's in here." / "Today of all days, and now I'm being forced to listen to her feelings? I won't do it. And who cares about her feelings anyway? Nobody, that's who. What about my feelings? Now, that's interesting, okay?" / "This man is clearly a monster, and he will be punished accordingly.")

Dennis wanting Mac to make his own decisions instead of looking at him for answers ("Well, you didn't tell me whether I should save him or not." "But why? I mean, why do I still have to tell you what to do? [...] And why is it up to me to decide whether or not you're going to save a man's life?"), being upset that Mac wouldn't just jump in to save him. Dennis being worried about his own mortality.

Dennis being paralleled to the Jumper, with the algorithm centering on what they should do with him. Also being the one insisting emotions be kept out of it, yet constantly acting emotional. The casaba, arguably, since Dennis is the Jumper, and the casaba was meant to represent it... ("I don't think you have to hide it, man").

The salon in Chop being called <3 or death, Dennis trying to stop others from making choices reads like him regretting North Dakota ("They're clearly bored and lonely and needing to do something extreme in order to make themselves feel special"), plus the obsession with hair mirroring that in S15, insisting that cutting the hair doesn't follow tradition (structure). Dennis being paralleled to Poppins ("My dog came back!" "How the hell is that dog still alive?" "Yeah, Mac, why don't you just put that poor thing out of its misery?" "Put him down? What, are you crazy? This is my dog, Dee. I love him.") both for having kids he doesn't take care of, and for leaving and coming back.

Dennis being at the center of Big Mo, insisting they keep guarding the base because doing otherwise would lead to death, and then also being the one to say that it's time to end the game. The entire revelation that brings us to the new era started by S15 hinges on Dennis' turning point, deciding not to guard the base (the structure! ...his structure?) anymore.

"They leave but they all come back." is the credits backwards message to season 14. Parallels Dennis leaving for ND.

Dennis having covid parallels Frank's dialogue about Barbara and thus Dee's dialogue for the role she's trying for ("Overnight, she became completely irrational with the hot flashes and the mood swings and the paranoia. That was the worst. Always accusing me of having affairs.").

Dennis' obsession with things being authentic while he himself is so in denial it almost causes him to die. The castle as his facade/identity, telling him what to do, the banquet of humiliation being about punishing a dad for abandoning his child, like Dennis did ("You wine and dine the man while also pointing out all of his character flaws, and then you lure him over to the castle's murder hole." "I'm not gonna kill him or anything, but it's got to be hot enough to be annoying as sh¡t, right? You know what I mean? Yeah. Burn him. Uh, he's gonna get burned. But, I mean, Charlie's got to see him lose his cool, so we can expose him as the child-abandoning monster that he really is.")

The recent seasons have kept laying down implications regarding Dennis in particular. We all remember the Range Rover ("I got to tell you, guys, that Range Rover, that was... that was like a part of me. You know, I considered it part of my identity, really." from New Wheels) being blown up by Mac with the RPG. Without getting into the specifics of what it may be (draw your conclusions, I'll draw mine), something about Dennis' identity is being... concealed, like with make up. Been tampered with, like the hair. Covered up, like Frank's shred-and-spread. Basically, it stands to reason that his back is the one that breaks in the finale, because we may get to explore that, his identity. (And because he feels like he's being left behind by the gang...? Remember tends bar... and thundergun too, its whole motto is no man left behind and yet he dies, which goes completely against that!)

"All right, you know what, guy? Here's what I'm feeling. Forget this dude. He was a deadbeat, right? Can we just go home?"

Season/ritual finished, they return home to their roots, with a newfound love for it.

Not letting the corpse (show) get between them (RCG).

"And we carry our country with us wherever we go! Because we love her! And when you love someone, you can't bear to leave 'em behind!"

So what does this mean for season 16?

The main analysis is done.

It was my goal inside this post to speculate as little as possible, so that hopefully the meta discussed would hold up regardless. This small footnote is for me to go crazy at the end, if you will.

If you were to ask me... season 16 is the aftermath of change. Wanting to go back to the way things were, back to your roots... but you've all changed. It's you (the gang) who's different. No matter where they are now.

"It's the end of the Vitruvian era! It's over! Goddamn! Goddamn! My essence has... been ruined by tiny cars, castle beds and... Goddamn. I hate this godforsaken country!"

So, if you were to see the "falling back in love with something" as an arc, this to me may be the moment in the story where you start to realize what you've missed out on, and what you miss that you already had. Paddy's may be the same, but the gang isn't. Least of all, Dennis.

"Love I get so lost sometimes Days pass and this emptiness fills my heart When I want to run away I drive off in my car But whichever way I go I come back to the place you are All my instincts, they return The grand facade, so soon will burn Without a noise, without my pride I reach out from the inside"

Because when you love someone, you can't bear...

I wonder if we'll ever get to see the RPG fired, that's clearly the type of explosion they crave, isn't it? Sometimes in order to save something you have to destroy it...

"Dear Anna, our time apart only makes my heart grow fonder." (oh like inflation?)

I don't know. I think Dennis, like the show (since their meta aligns), will try to embrace taking decisions based on feelings rather than being cold and calculative. And I think the gang will find that very weird, and may think he's got his bell rung or it's a cry for help or "he's probably faking it".

I also think we will be introduced to the concept of a new structure. That may be the DENNIS system reworked (or just realizing how appalling the old one is, underlining how that structure doesn't work for them anymore), or it may be some method Dennis is using to try to improve his mental health (it would make sense in meta... trying ways to get better... and failing too, like the trip to ireland being a disaster, but still teaching them something along the way), "What's the first word that comes to your mind to describe us?", something like that. Attempting to redefine what was previously established in a new way that works better, that adapts to their current needs.

So we will have gone from... classic (s14), exploration and change (s15), redefining (s16).

Of course, I don't think the exploration and change is finished either. The scene with Frank and Charlie finding a bathroom (which btw... also reminds me of my spec script...) still recalls Big Mo ("We're finding all kinds of corners of this place that we've never explored before."). I think all seasons moving forward will bring up past stuff they never got into before, to some extent. They have a lot of seeds to wade through, after all. They're not running out of those any time soon. Maybe that's what the scene refers too, believability? Might be why there's all those lamps (I didn't discover this... someone smarter than me did). After all this is something they never had to battle before from the comfort of their structure, but now that they're changing things, how much can they do before it's not believable?

I'm not even gonna get into the gang gets cursed without a synopsis, there's too much at stake for me to get wrong... some thoughts were the curse of the banshee, the curse from gets trapped (indiana jones reference... also referenced in s15... ark of the covenant... the crate... "In the bible, there are passages that explain that if a man touches the ark or looks inside it when it is opened, he will die." ...hm! fascinating), the god hole... I won't. I can't. The post is already way too long.

So... this is the end.

Thank you for reading all the way to here, you're insane for doing that, but I deeply appreciate it. Leave some tags if you wants, this took me 5 days to write and I also lost some edits at the end which was like three hours of work... woof.

And please feel free to add your own thoughts and considerations about this meta, despite how long this post ended up being I'm sure I've only scratched the surface of it, especially because I had to disregard almost everything prior to s14 for the sake of staying brief (I KNOW RIGHT?), and I'm sure there's dialogue I didn't include or multiple interpretations that escaped me. It happens, this show is hefty with them. But I hope you enjoyed. Thanks.

[ftm-megamind]

i think jack is more of a ya fantasy type guy whereas david is more of a ya dystopian type guy. these two probably intertwine sometimes

[nokingsonlyfooles]

WTYP: The Shandor Building, Part 1 [take 2, the long post vs Tumblr's formatting]

[Do you like the colour of the fanfic? This is long and if you expand it you're gonna get the whole thing, because Tumblr hates you. Don't say I didn't warn you!]

[Beware of strong language, mention of all kinds of death, gore, and Lovecraftian horror.]

Part 1: Hello and Welcome to Shandor Studios (it's weird)

[TRANSCRIBER'S NOTE: The moon was waning and a raven was tapping on my window when I discovered a heretofore unknown tier at the WTYP Patreon page. It was called "Pazuzu" and cost $6.66 USD. It had one listed benefit "bonus bonus episode." I unlocked a single unnumbered bonus episode titled "Ibo Shanor" and subtitled "train bad actually." Judging from the dialogue, it dates to summer 2023. Since it lacked any closed-captioning, I took the liberty of transcribing it, and coping most of the slides for your edification. (Not really, this is a work of fiction.) I have styled Ms. Caldwell-Kelly as "Alice" since she still seems to be using that in podcast land at this time. Please support WTYP!]

[SLIDE: Shandor Studios, an art deco style building with some familiar-looking gargoyles perched on it, and poor JPEG compression, with an inset of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man. Captioned: Will the Real Ivo Shandor Please Stand Up?]

JUSTIN ROCZNIAK (R): Hello, and welcome to Well There’s Your Problem, a podcast about engineering disasters with…

LIAM ANDERSON (L) [chanting]: Studio! Studio! Studio!

R: …with slides.

L: Studio! Suck it, Discord!

ALICE CALDWELL-KELLY (A): It’s quite nice, actually. There’s a little break room, and somebody left us one of those edible arrangements, and a paperback Necronomicon…

DEVON (D) [text over slide]: IT WAS ACTUALLY VERY NICE. I HAD MY OWN CONTROL ROOM. BUT IT WAS NOT WORTH IT.

L [distorted, too close to the mic]: My audio sounds amazing! This bonus episode is about Liam’s cool mic!

A [obligingly]: Yay, Liam’s cool mic.

R: It’s made of meat, though.

L: What, my cool mic?

R: No, the edible arrangement in the break room. They’re usually made of fruit, this one is made of meat. Raw meat.

A: Yes, I was wondering if that was an American thing. [laughter] I’ve never been to Massachusetts before!

L: It’s Innsmouth, Alice. Nobody’s ever been to Innsmouth. It doesn’t technically exist.

R: It’s not even on Google Maps.

A: Is it sort of a, er, township? Unincorporated township?

R: It’s more of a, uh, cult.

A: Like an MLM?

L: Like Christianity!

R: Well, a bunch of fish people founded it in the late eighteen hundreds…

L: Fucking fish.

R: …and let’s say they got up to some questionable activities.

A: Anything I should be worried about?

R: Well…

A: I did travel here by interdimensional portal and that’s just a bit… off-putting? It’s very convenient, but…

L: Swimming, having gills…

R: I took the train.

L: Just breathe air, you little shits!

A: Did they not offer you an interdimensional portal, then?

R: No, they did, I just said I’d rather take the train.

A: How was it?

R: Not bad. It was made of meat, though. The train. Smooth ride. Turns out meat is an excellent shock absorber, just not very practical. There was a flock of ravens trying to eat us the whole way.

A: That’s… a bit odd.

L: Brian Phelps.

R: Brian Phelps is made of meat?

L: No, Brian Phelps is a fucking fish. [shouting, too close to mic again] You’re not fooling anyone, Brian! God, I could go for some salami. Is there any salami in the meat bouquet?

R: There is definitely not any salami in the meat bouquet.

L: I’m gonna make myself a sandwich!

[scraping sound, footsteps, door opens and closes]

A: It’s nice having a studio, though.

R: It’s not bad. I like these chairs with the wheels. Good lumbar support. How was the portal?

A: Terrifying, but brief. Very brief. It materialised right under me in the dairy aisle of Tesco’s, then I was in this howling green tunnel for about five seconds, and then I was here. On the one hand, I didn’t have to show my passport or go through security, but on the other hand, I’m just slightly concerned I might have cancer. Or a prion disease. [nervous laugh] Or maybe I’ll turn into a fish person. Did you mean literal fish people?

R: Yes.

A: I suppose… Someone got very lonely and fucked a fish, or…?

R: Yes.

A: What? Are you being serious? What kind of a fish… Do you mean mermaids?

R: No. In fact, mermaids have a notorious design flaw when it comes to sexual congress with us human types. What you’re after, as a lonely sailor, is an animal known as the “reverse-mermaid,” which is widely regarded as a joke, and depicted as the head and torso of a fish, with human legs, and presumably genitalia, underneath… [drawing a reverse-mermaid on the slide, with the mouse, badly] But which is in fact more of an elder god by the name of Dagon, which does indeed have legs and genitalia, but is more of a fully-anthropomorphic monstrous fish. [drawing monstrous legs and feet] He’s a bit larger and taller. Here, I’ll put a “D” for Dagon. [draws arrow] And the rest of him is up there.

A: As a lonely sailor myself, I don’t see how something like that is any more fuckable than a regular fish. Or a manatee. Frankly, I’d rather fuck a manatee. At least it’s a mammal.

R: Yeah, but you’d be violating the Endangered Species Act.

A [laughing]: I’m sorry, aren’t they endangered? We want them to fuck! You told me to save the manatees, well I’m out there doing it! And then I’m going to save the whales!

R: Debatable whether creating a race of half-human, half-manatee hybrids is saving the species…

A: Are you some kind of fucking manatee eugenicist? If the manatee and I are both consenting adults, and we fancy each other, then leave us the fuck alone! This is how evolution works!

R: In the mind of Donald Trump, yes.

[door opening and closing]

D [text over slide]: I COULD EDIT THAT OUT BUT I’M TOO TRAUMATISED AND DRUNK.

L: You guys… Is that supposed to be a fucking fish?

R: No. It’s the legendary reverse-mermaid.

L: Well, I only respect half of it! Here. The meat bouquet started screaming when I cut into it, so I grabbed some doughnuts. 

A: Oh, are there doughnuts? The meat bouquet has a way of…

L: You didn’t hear it?

R: The meat bouquet?

A: …of arresting one’s attention…

L [excited]: The soundproofing in here is fucking incredible!

D [text over slide]: IN RETROSPECT, THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN A RED FLAG.

A: Out of sheer, morbid curiosity, did the doughnut scream?

L: Doughnuts don’t scream.

R: Do the doughnuts scream in… in the UK?

A: …No, not usually. Perhaps, perhaps on the continent, but not usually in Britain. They’re very stuffy and well-behaved.

L: And transphobic.

A: Of course.

L: Do you want one of these?

A: Er, I rather think… I’d better not eat or drink anything until another portal opens up and sends me home. Just in case this is a Persephone sort of situation…

R: Probably a good idea.

L: Low blood sugar kills, Alice. [muffled, chewing]

R: You’ll wind up married to Hades and having to spend six months out of the year in Massachusetts.

L: I’m spending twelve months out of the year in this studio, I don’t care if it’s in Massachusetts. If I have to, I will marry Hades twice.

R: Nah, you see, that’s not legal in Massachusetts. You’d be in a bigamous relationship with yourself.

L: Well, then one of you has to do it. Daddy needs his new mic. These chairs are awesome too!

[rumbling, squeaking]

A: I’m already in a very committed relationship with the Mothman, actually. We go around collapsing bridges and making appearances just out of camera frame. It’s quite fun.

R: Alice is actually a cryptid wanted across several New England states.

A: Yes, I’d like very much to get back to it, and not get cancer or die! [nervous laughter] Ah, shall we get on with the episode?

L: I’m never leaving this studio. You will pry this microphone from my cold, dead hand.

A: Intros? Did we do intros?

R: It’s a bonus episode, they already know us.

D [text over slide]: HONESTLY IF WE’D JUST DONE THE INTROS, IT WOULD’VE SAVED US A LOT OF TROUBLE.

A: Right…

R: But we do have [news drop] the God Damn News.

Part 2 will be another post, give me a minute and I'll link it...

[kennysaysthings]

I find their relationship really interesting, IF they were “together” (secretly banging) in the early seasons then that’s all it was, they could never label it not for lack of trying they just couldn’t bring themselves to call it something that it was. What if Dennis wanted this again, what if Mac said no because he’s out, because he’s finally out and he can’t hide again because there’s no going back ever, what if Mac suggested more, not doing more, not more of anything just calling it what it is this time? What if Dennis is so desperately clinging to the idea what if they call it something else their friendship will change, it will deteriorate like the girls he flaunts as conquests, the world will fold in on itself if they can’t go back to being friends. But it’s too late. Mac came out, he desperately clawed his way out of the closet and he was fully out, he started calling what he and Dennis have more than what they ever considered it, and now he can’t do it, not anymore, Mac can’t keep giving so much when Dennis keeps shooting him down, he can’t cling to Dennis forever the way he promised to so long ago, because Dennis doesn’t want him. He doesn’t want to change what they have over something that might not even last them a week. They are so hopelessly in love but in such different ways. Mac is devoted to Dennis’s every word, he would kiss the ground he walks on, the would follow his voice surrounded by broken glass, he would sacrifice everything to be able to openly love him. Dennis is afraid, he doesn’t want to lose something he’s known far too long, he can’t give it up because what if it feel wrong? What if it isn’t right? What if Mac changes his mind? What if he decides he never wanted it? When has Dennis ever chased after someone and found himself letting them walk all over him, I’m waiting for a “I don’t want things to change between us” line and then Mac telling him it doesn’t have to. Dennis can’t let himself, let them, have this. Just this.

I want a scene in the show where Dennis is staring at Mac with a giant smile on his face, I want him to not be able to pull himself away, I don’t want Mac to give in right away. I want the desperate push and pull of “does he really want this or if he messing with me” and “why doesn’t he want this anymore?” I want the miscommunication to be spot on I want Charlie to hear the complaints and I want Dennis to go to Dee and find comfort in the bond that they hold and I want Dee to say she called it years ago and I want so much from this season that I will NEVER see.

[oracleofmadness]

I have two main thoughts on this book that sort of are in conflict. First, the book is just a bit too long imo. Second, it's just an incredible, brilliant piece of fantasy.

I was really flummoxed by how long the book was bc for whatever reason this seemed insurmountable at times. But there was no way I could have stopped reading. This author speaks on magic in so many different forms and, for obvious and yet still surprising reasons, love being one of the greatest forms of them all.

This book begins with Susannah, one of my favorite characters, grieving the loss of her little sister, Laura. She also grieves for the simultaneous loss of her friend Mo and ex-boyfriend Daniel. When a year passes and all three miraculously return to life, they find out about some pretty incredible changes and begin a sort of test to try and stay alive.

This story is full. It is told from all character's perspectives throughout and really left me feeling like I have gone through this whole thing with them. Not just main characters, but the community itself. The author doesn't just paint a picture but truly fleshed out these individuals. And, yet I feel like they are all endlessly bound together. I really enjoyed this!

Out February 13, 2024!

Thank you, Netgalley and Publisher, for this Arc!

[displayheartcode]

Okay, I ran a bunch of errands today and yesterday. Tomorrow, I will force to myself to sit down, chill, and write

[jewishrizahawkeye]

im at the point in the parks and rec rewatch where they got really really big and it kinda loses some of its charm

[fluffydavey]

concern for others aka how many times can i hurt davey || prompts

don’t move. i’ll be there in ten minutes for @anotherdaveyjacobs which i accidentally deleted the ask, but she’s in the mood for hurting the boy xo

It’s a slow news day, and Jack is dreaming of some hot food and an early night, tired from standing around all day, practically getting ignored by anyone who walks past him. He’d split up from Les and Davey, trying to see if they could reach more people, and he wonders if they’re doing any better than he is currently.  He’s kicking a stone as he sits on a bench, looking out to see if there’s anyone he could sell to, when a worried looking Henry comes rushing over to him. “Boss, you gotta come quick!”

He rushes after Henry, and doesn’t have a clue what could possibly get Henry looking so worked up. That’s when he turns a corner, and sees Davey lying on the floor, a pool of blood surrounding him. Les is crying, holding onto Race who’s trying his absolute best to get the younger boy to go home with him, but he’s putting up a damn good fight to stay with the older boys. 

“Did he see?” he mouths to Race, who shakes his head. That’s something, at least. 

He kneels down on the floor beside Davey, trying to assess the damage done, and he can see that Davey’s awake and alert, which is something. “Les,” Davey breathes out, wincing at the word. Even as badly beaten as he is now, his only concern is for his brother. 

With dread in his stomach, he stands up and picks Les up. “Don’t move. I’ll be there in ten minutes,” he says to the boys, as he carries Les back to the Jacobs household. Les is still uncontrollably crying, calling out for his brother the entire run to Davey’s home, and  kicking and squirming under Jack’s hold, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t make it back to Davey as soon as humanly possible.

He makes it to their home in a record speed time, and as soon as Meyer lays an eye at the sight ahead of him, he realises something is very wrong. Jack tells him the little that he knows, and reassures him that Davey will be alright - he has to be - and he’ll bring Davey back as soon as possible. He can see the anguish in Meyer’s eyes, with his injury, he won’t be much help. “I promise, we’ll take care of him and bring him straight back.”

Jack turns his back to begin rushing back down the streets, when he hears Meyer call out to him. “Be careful, son.” And god, the words weigh down on Jack, not knowing how to respond. Even not knowing just what’s happened to his eldest son, Meyer’s worried for his safety. The journey back is a blur, running through the streets until he finally finds a larger crowd of newsies surrounding Davey, who’s now sitting up against the alleyway, holding onto his ribs. 

It’s Finch who spots him first, who promptly moves some of the boys out of the way for Jack to get to Davey. “Seems like some newsie from another borough tried taking his money,” Race tells him, and when Jack looks up he’s surprised to see Spot standing beside him, looking equally as concerned.

“I’ll find out who it was,” she says, venom dripping from her words. If word has made way to Brooklyn, he’s sure it’s spreading fast and wide by now. Jack kneels down to Davey’s level, and places a gentle arm on his shoulder. 

“It’s alright, we’ve got you,” he says, watching as Davey stares blankly ahead of him. When he stands, Race takes him aside to tell them what they know. Les had run off ahead, finding a group of women to sell to. When he finally returned, Davey was lying unconscious, so the young boy ran to the nearest newsies he could find - Henry and Romeo, although Davey had woken again by this point. He’d been hit on the head with something, and by the looks of the many scars on his face, it hadn’t been a one-on-one fight. 

“How are you feeling Davey?” he asks, his stomach churning at the sight before him. If only he hadn’t tried seperating from him he could have been there to stop this. He’s furious, but he knows that won’t be of any use right now. He’s going to make sure Spot lets him come along to visit these kids who dared lay a finger on Davey.

“Like shit,” Davey answers, his words slurred slightly. He’s got a concussion then. 

“Did they hurt you anywhere else?” Spot asks, her voice softer than Jack’s ever heard. Davey shakes his head, but the blood seeping through his shirt says otherwise. He’s not even sure Davey can remember what happened. 

“We need to get him back to the lodgings, it’s closer than his home,” Race says, as all eyes drop to the injured boy. “Dave, this is gonna hurt. But we can’t help you out here in the streets.” Jack and Race bend down to slowly lift Davey up from the alleyway wall, Jack doing his best to ignore the pained sounds coming from Davey. He leans against Jack, as they begin walking back, the other boys following behind. 

When they get in, Albert quickly runs to get some fresh wet cloths from Kloppmann, and Race gathers as many bandages as they have. It’s Crutchie who’s able to get everyone to leave Jack alone to sort Davey out, although he can hear their friends waiting behind the closed door. 

“This is gonna hurt,” he warns Davey, who actually laughs at the comment. He carefully and slowly watches the cuts on his face, and he feels Davey’s determined eyes watching him. “You still with me?”

“Always,” Davey answers, wincing as Jack washes a particularly deep wound over Davey’s left eye. “Les? He okay?”

“He’s at home. You gave him a real scare,” Jack says, gently titlting Davey’s head back to see if there’s anything he missed. “Gave us all a really good scare. Even Spot’s here.”

“She is?” he askes, closing his eyes. Jack’s about to shout at him to keep his eyes open, afraid that Davey will lose consciousness again, but notices Davey take a deep breath as he opens his eyelids, seemingly trying to take control of the situation himself. “Don’t let her do anything - we run things differently now.”  

“That was before you got attacked,” Jack quips, his anger returning. “No newsie hurts their own. How many where there?”

Davey takes a moment to answer, and Jack isn’t sure if he’s hiding the truth or if he genuienly can’t remember. “Three.”

“Three?!” he repeats, louder than he should. By the sounds of the voices at the other side of the door, he thinks their friends have heard him. “Davey, you couldn’t have done anything to protect yourself. This isn’t a matter to settle in a union, this is bigger than that.”

“No one else gets hurt,” Davey repeats, sounding the most like himself since he’d been hit.

Jack wants to fight him on this, but he knows it’s not the time. “Where else did they get you?”

Davey sits up straighter. “One kicked me when I was down. Not hard enough to do anything,” he says, which Jack isn’t sure he believes. “I don’t remember anything else.”

His parents will probably get a doctor to look over him properly, so he does his best to clean him up as best as he can, even convincing Davey to let him bandage up his ribs just in case. There’s more than one bruise, but he doesn’t think any of his ribs are broken, thankfully. “Jack,” Davey says, pulling at his shirt. “Jack, it looks worse than it is.”

“No Davey, it isn’t. They teamed up against you and you - ” Jack stops himself, a lump forming in his throat. What if Les hadn’t found him? What if he had been hit harder? What if something worse happened? “No one gets to hurt you.”

“What’s so different about me?” he asks, and of course, Davey doesn’t get it. “You’ve said it yourself, you’ve all gotten into fights.”

“Because I can’t see you like this. I just can’t, okay? Do you know how terrified I was when I saw you first? I thought you were gone.”

“Jack - ”

“All I could think was I haven’t even told him,” he says, pathetically. This wasn’t how he planned on telling Davey how he felt, but what if it had been worse? “I’m not good with my words, but I’ve been trying to tell you just how much you mean to me. But I can’t waste anymore time, because things could have been much worse, and I don’t know what I would do without you. Please, just, don’t do that again.”

He brushes his thumb against Davey’s cheek, leaning down to press his forehead against Davey’s lightly. “I am only going to say this once, so you better listen - I love you.”

“I’d kiss you if I hadn’t just coughed up some blood,” Davey says, giving Jack a minor heart attack.

“You owe me one then,” he says, as he moves away, taking in the sight in front of him. Davey’s bloody and bruised, but he’s alive.

“I owe you,” Davey repeats, and gives him a slight smile in response, as much as his busted lip will allow him. 

“It’s gonna hurt like a bitch, but I’m gonna get you home. You think you can handle it? I’m sure some of the boys will be helping us out,” he says, helping Davey up, who’s putting most of his weight against Jack still. He calls out for Race, but it’s Spot who runs in, placing her arm around Davey’s side to help Jack.

They take their time walking back to the Jacobs household, with Race and Crutchie coming along for support. Meyer opens the door, and Jack sees that Sarah and Esther have already set everything up that he’ll need in the living room. “We’ve got it from here,” Esther says, as they gently sit Davey down on the sofa. 

Jack stands tall, watching Sarah fuss over her brother. “Thank you for looking out for him,” Meyer says, patting him on the back. “All of you, please. We can’t thank you enough.”    

“As long as he’s okay,” Jack says, his eyes not leaving Davey. 

“Come back tomorrow if you want to see him,” Esther says, placing her hand over Jack’s, but she leaves the invitation open for the others too. “I know it’ll mean the world to him.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t stop it,” he says, quietly. 

“You did everything you could to help him,” Esther says, as he wraps her arms around Jack to give him a hug. “You brought back both of my boys home to me, that’s what matters.”

"Jack?” he hears a small voice call out just as he’s about to leave with the others, and he turns in time for Les to jump up and give him a hug. “Thank you for helping Davey.”

“Anytime kiddo,” he says, brushing the kid’s unruly hair. “You know how much I care about you two.”

It’s Spot who finally gathers them all to leave the family in peace. As soon as they’re outside, Jack finally feels like he can take a breath. “It wasn’t your fault,” she says, placing her hands in her pockets. He thinks she knows best just how it feels to see one of your own hurt like that.

“I know,” he says, and he thinks he almost believes himself. “Still doesn’t mean I wish I wasn’t there to stop them.”

Spot leaves them to go back to Brooklyn, Race offering to walk her home. He heads back to the lodgings with Crutchie in silence, and returns to his room to find that someone’s cleaned up all of the evidence of the night that’s just passed. He climbs into bed, trying to forget the image of Davey all bloodied and bruised. He’s okay, Jack tells himself, they’re going to be okay. A mantra he repeats in his head until he finally falls asleep.

[yekokataa]

getting the vibe that you read a lot, what are your fav books that you've read so far this year?

i do read a lot! faves from this year:

transcendent kingdom by yaa gyasi

entangled life by merlin sheldrake

the angel's game by carlos ruiz zafón

white cat, black dog by kelly link

[amiharana]

i know you made a post of links singing voice but since you write link with dialogue what do you imagine his normal speaking voice to sound like? as a whole seeing how different people write link speaking is so fun, do you think link is more witty or stoic, rambly or to the point, loud or quiet, vulgar or formal.. 🤔

you're right this is a very fun ask anon let me kiss u /p. after ingesting this ask, i of course started having a flood of ideas in my brain so i wrote . a lot . again. so get comfy, sit down, and have a snack!

i can't remember where i saw this or if it's even considered canon, but i remember seeing something about botw link being from the country, and as you might have guessed from reading one of my recent previous posts, i am very much a link's-hometown-was-hateno-village truther. i believe in-game bolson's text about the house in hateno pretty much implied that link might have been the previous owner prior to the calamity, but my take on it is that it was link's family home and the guy who left it behind was actually link's father, who sold the house and took link with him to hyrule castle. anyways regarding link's voice as a kid, besides probably sounding like a high-pitched little brat, i like to imagine that kiddie link probably had a heavy country accent. i'm clutching my stomach in laughter as i type this, but i thought about that topher kid from that one tiktok as what kid!link would sound like. god this topher kid is so fucking funny sdkjfjdkfkj i bet this paragraph didn't end how you thought it was going to

from here on, we know that pre-calamity link somehow got a hold of the master sword when he was like 12 or something, and sometime between then and being chosen as zelda's knight, he chose to remain silent because he knew the entirety of hyrule had their eyes on him, which is a very nerve-wracking situation to be in. since moving to closer to hyrule castle town with his father to join the knights, link's country accent slowly faded since the noble kids would make fun of him and call him farmboy and that he was dirt poor :/ so link carefully trained himself to talk in the standard dialect, but his accent slips if he gets too emotional or upset. when he got a hold of the master sword, the nobles were real fucking mad, saying stuff like The Master Sword is meant for legends, not a pathetic farmboy born in a pigsty like you. yeah i do not like these fake hylian nobles i just made up very much lol...

i like to think that when he felt more comfortable with the champions and zelda, he started talking a little more with them but mostly stayed quiet and communicated nonverbally. my first instinct was to say that link's voice would probably be rough and dry from disuse since he wasn't speaking very much, but i remembered my roots as a singer!link supporter and now i'm thinking about him humming to himself as he cooks himself a pumpkin stew like he does in-game, or whistling whatever notes come to mind, or (get this) singing quietly to zelda's batch of silent princess flowers in her private greenhouse in the castle gardens as he tends to them because he think that will make them grow stronger and healthier. he has never spoken to the king because he outright refuses to, tbh, but if he had to, i think link would do his best to sound stoic and formal. i doubt that he ever received like. "noble linguistics" training or some more classist bullshit like that, but when he and zelda get closer, link actually makes fun of her royal accent once or twice. he'd be doing shit like this video of bts namjoon's british accent and zelda is facedown on the floor laughing her ass off.

overall, i think pre-calamity link is very quiet and soft-spoken when he feels comfortable enough to talk, so quiet that daruk feels like he has to stop breathing to try to listen to what link is saying. don't get me wrong though, link isn't meek or shy (unless he's around revali teehee it's like his brain gets rewired around the rito). he simply just doesn't feel the need to broadcast his voice to everyone in hyrule. i also really like the idea of link knowing sign language, but he only likes to use it with zelda when he prefers to communicate nonverbally and later on, with the other champions (revali takes extra care to study as much hylian sign language so that he can understand link :> ).

now post-calamity/resurrection link... whew! it's pretty clear in the game that link has some method of communicating with everyone else in hyrule since we're given dialogue options despite link not having an actual VA saying words. i have chosen to believe that link becomes a vocal menace when he gets resurrected. since he wakes up with no memories, he obviously doesn't remember his whole History Has Its Eyes On You mentality (sorry for the h*milton reference) and goes apeshit on his own vocal chords. mf is running around the great plateau screaming and shouting and cursing (that's the one part of his memory that was kept intact). he also ends up talking to himself a lot, because for a lot of botw, you're alone. yes, you go to villages and meet travelers along the way, but for like 80% of the game you are . alone. so link has to keep himself entertained one way or another, to make sure he doesn't go completely crazy, and yeah you know what? he does get rambly sometimes, because he doesn't spend a lot of time with people as he traverses through hyrule so he doesn't really know the best times to start or stop talking. he gets a hang of it though! he told a random traveler once who was interested in getting up into the great plateau that he woke up on the plateau, an old man made him go get these dumb purple balls in those shrine things for the paraglider that he just knew needed to be with him, turns out the guy was the ghost of KING RHOAM BOSPHORAMUS HYRULE, and then he jumped off of the plateau using the paraglider. the traveler dude looked at him like he was insane, so link was like yeah i'm never talking about this to anyone else ever again.

now when link remembers memories of the past as he travels... he goes unnaturally silent for a while. of course, if he gained this memory while talking to someone, he still continues to talk to them, just... with less words. but when he's out there in the wilderness by himself get psychologically assaulted by shattered and frayed images of people he can hardly remember, memories getting replayed in his head and tattooed behind his eyes, all because this neat alcove under a tree in the rain looked kinda cool... his throat locks up and his mouth dries and he remembers even for a sliver of a moment, what his past self must have felt like, choosing to stay silent despite all the pressure trying to crack his ribcage open like a tree nut. those memories are on replay in the forefront of his mind for a couple days and he can't sleep. it was even worse when he went to rito village to fight windblight ganon, and link started have full body pains as he received memories of revali all at once, collapsing in pained sobs in saki and teba's roost. why did his heart so much? it didn't hurt like this when he remembered daruk, or even mipha...

also from the in-game dialogue options, link is very sassy and that's so #real of him. some of those options really spoke to me, like the dumb puns he makes ("Let's seal the deal!" oh you think you're funny huh?) or when he demands the paraglider from the old man ("Hand it over!" #throwback to my post about the paraglider). idk sometimes i can only imagine link with crossed arms and a hip cocked out and an eyebrow raised like yass come on mean girls! imagine meeting the hylian champion and you call him pretty and he's like awh thanks you too! and you're like omg thank you :D and he's like. so you agree. you think you're pretty? so yes link is a little bitch sometimes LMAO

i also think it would be funny if link came up with his own curses as he travels and when he curses in front of others, they're standing there like. what just came out of your mouth????? because link is out here saying shit like Suck my lynel guts you fuckheaded shitshroom Like dude is just stringing words together from what the hyrule compendium told him when he took pictures of the ingredients and items he was finding. just making shit up and saying whatever words he wants based on vibes and whatever feels right. impa takes him aside and gives him a list of proper/modern curse words, but link will still fight bokos and be like I'm gonna shove this ancient core up your ass and roast you on a spit shroomfucker. his accent definitely bleeds back into his voice when he does his weird version of cursing too, so link will save random travelers from monsters and sometimes yell at them while he's fighting them off if his emotions are running high, and the travelers are just like Who is this guy and what is he even saying

i think that link would still retain his soft-spokenness after some time, especially post-calamity fight when the champions are revived. like a lot of what i just said are more kind of special cases; screaming on the great plateau is a perfectly normal response to waking up with amnesia and then there's these red little pig-faced guys trying to bite you. and of course i'm not saying link is always talking to himself as he travels across the map. his horse would have kicked him off long ago from being irritated. but when he stops to rest and make food for himself and his horse in the wilds, he hums or sings quietly as he cooks, because it's comforting to him even if he doesn't remember why. sometimes he'll take a nap in some random cave or just sit quietly under a tree listening to the sounds of the rain falling around him. (link calms down considerably when the champions are revived, and he gets revali back, because now he's able to properly deal with his memories and eventually regains most of them peacefully. revali is horrified though when link stubs his toe and link starts hissing like Ah fuck this you keese-faced gutfucker Like HUH? EXCUSE ME?)

overall, post-resurrection link is just a traumatized little guy with no inhibitions and lets some his impulsive thoughts win. he's a chatty, charismatic prettyboy who also will go completely silent and stare with dead eyes and definitely jumpscared beedle like that once.

[gingerwerk]

If I had a nickel for every time I came up with a scene in a fic where one half of the otp picks the other up from the airport and the half of the otp that’s getting picked up does Something impulsive that shows their romantic feelings for the other I’d have two nickels

[deeism]

in the seventh circle of hell recently guys sorry for my lack of original funny sexy smart awesome posts

[nokingsonlyfooles]

WTYP: The Shandor Building, Part 11

[Do you like the colour of the fanfic? This is long and if you expand it you're gonna get the whole thing, because Tumblr hates you. Don't say I didn't warn you!]

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10

Part 11: Shake Hands with Gozer

[Beware of strong language, mention of all kinds of death, gore, and Lovecraftian horror.]

[SLIDE: Shandor Studios, with the All Hail Gozer logo.]

[faint sound of a car alarm]

L: Oh, heck, it’s Gandalf…

[chirp-chirp]

[car alarm ceases]

A [dismissive]: You know, this is really not doing it for me anymore. The whole deal. Not even with a camera. No. Fuck it. Your personality is a real turn-off.

R: These chairs are still really comfy, though.

[rumbling, squeaking]

G: [muffled, into phone]: UH-HUH… UH-HUH… IN MY DEFENSE, THEY INSULTED MY DOGS AND SUGGESTED I ASSOCIATE WITH ELON MUSK, ABI… YES, ADMITTEDLY, BUT THERE’S NO NEED TO BE RUDE… MM-HM. WHAT’S IT CALLED? “CLIMATE CHANGE”? [with sudden excitement] OH! “GLOBAL WARMING!” YES! HOW LONG? OH, THAT’S NOT LONG AT ALL! NO, NO, I REALLY APPRECIATE THE IRONY. DIY APOCALYPSE! OH, YES, WE MUST GIVE THEM A CHANCE, MUSTN’T WE? HA-HA-HA. BUT, UH, DO YOU THINK THERE MIGHT BE… A LAKE OF FIRE? EVEN A SMALL ONE? [laughter] WOW! THAT SOUNDS AMAZING!

L: I don’t like where this is going…

A: Rocz, where the hell are my cigarettes?

R: I fed them to a dog.

A: What?

G: SO ABOUT SEVEN BILLION YEARS ON THE OUTSIDE? WELL, I GET BORED, ABI. YOU KNOW I GET BORED. WILL YOU KEEP PODCASTING AND KILLING THE SMARMY MORTAL “JAMES BOND”? HA! ALL RIGHT, I SUPPOSE I WILL MANAGE…

D: Did… Did Abi just say we’re going to keep doing KJB for the next seven billion years…?

L: Sounds like the fate of the world kinda depends on it…

A: Where is my fucking Slimfast bar?

R: Ibid.

V: Will you have a slice of meat bouquet, Lord Alice?

A: [screams]

R: You two gotta stop doin’ that.

Z: Lord Alice is mortal, Vinz Clortho. You are supposed to feed the mortals frozen peas. It is good for them. The demon David Tennant says so.

L: I think you’re a little mixed up about that…

R: Your dimension gets Amazon Prime?

Z: All hell dimensions have Amazon Prime. Where else are we supposed to get our blood plasma?

V: But we have no frozen peas to give, and we must depart our mortal hosts soon!

Z: You may rub our tummies, if you wish. It is good for your mortal brain meat.

L: Aww!

Z: Not you, Vengeful Mortal of Insults!

L: Well, this has been a total fucking waste of time!

A: Get away from me, you smell like Marlboros and despair.

V: It is the Slimfast bar…

Z: You want some of this, Frodo?

D [coldly]: No thank you, Sigourney.

R [warmly]: Good Terror Dogs… Good, good puppies…

G: HA-HA, RIGHT! THESE THINGS HAPPEN! WELL, I’LL SEE YOU AT THE CLUB TONIGHT. CIAO, BESTIE!

L: “Bestie”?

A: [sigh] It’s Mesopotamian rock-paper-scissors, don’t worry about it.

D: To think, all this time, all we had to do was summon Abigail Thorn…

G: VINZ CLORTHO! ZUUL! STOP BOTHERING LORD ABIGAIL’S FRIENDS!

V: Farewell, doughnut-giver!

Z: Never buy copper from Ea-nāṣir!

[electricity, crackling]

MILKSHAKE (M)]: آیا من یک سگ بودم؟ [TRANSCRIBER’S NOTE: Okay, it’s in Persian, but Google Fonts doesn’t do cuneiform.]

R: Oh, hey, it’s my cats!

PIZZA BOY (P): پدر!

R: Nah, don’t eat that meat bouquet, I have no idea who or what that is…

M: این انصاف نیست.

R: Say, Gozer, is this here permanent?

G: ALL CATS CAN SPEAK WHATEVER LANGUAGE THEY WANT, WHENEVER THEY WANT.

P: Das ist ein süßes Kopftuch.

A: Um… Danke?

M: Никогда больше не трогай мой животик.

A: [snickers]

G: SO! [claps hands] SORRY FOR THIS LITTLE MISUNDERSTANDING. HOW CAN I MAKE IT UP TO YOU?

[brief pause]

G: WHAT?

[crosstalk, complaining, “We are covered in horse viscera!” “Clean this shit off!” etc.]

G: RIGHT. SORRY.

L: And I want to keep my new van!

G: YOUR VAN BELONGS TO ISHTAR, BUT I’LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO. WOULD YOU LIKE TO FINISH YOUR PODCAST, MORTALS?

A: Oh, yes! Of fucking course we would!

[Rapid scrolling through 10 slides or so before landing on an image of Ivo Shandor.]

A: And in conclusion… Ivo Shandor can eat shit, I’m glad he got ripped in half, art deco architecture is hideous, I disavow everything Sumerian — except Liam’s van and possibly Abi — and billionaires contribute nothing of value to society! [panting] Does anyone have anything else?

L: Pronoun checks will save your fucking life! If any of you out there ever give us shit for the pronoun check ever again, I got a [bleep] with your name on it!

G: SERIOUSLY. THAT COLONEL-SANDERS-LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER SUMMONED ME OUT OF A HOT BATH AND MISGENDERED ME ON PURPOSE — I’M GLAD I RIPPED HIM IN HALF TOO!

R: [drawing devil horns and an unflattering mustache on Shandor with the mouse] We have a segment on this podcast we like to call Safety Third…

A: What?

L: Oh my God, Rocz…

D: Fucking seriously?!

R: I’m sorry, but rigidly adhering to our unhinged podcast format has just saved our lives and possibly the entire world — and if we’d just done our goddamn intros we would’ve avoided that whole mess — so we’re going to do a Safety Third! Alice, the drop, please.

[“Shake hands with danger” drop]

[SLIDE: A pastoral oil painting that seems to be missing a figure with a shepherd's crook.]

G: OOH, THIS LOOKS FUN. CAN I PLAY TOO?

WTYP: NO.

D: And clear the slime out of my awesome control room.

G: OF COURSE.

D [suspiciously]: Be honest with me. If someone were to press a button and cover you in boiling hot lava, would that be an inconvenience?

G: OOH, DO YOU HAVE LAVA? I JUST LOVE LAVA!

D [slowly fading, walking away from the mics]: This has been a fucking waste of time!

[door slam]

R: “Dear Justin, Alice (or name pending)…”

G: IS THERE NOT GOING TO BE ANY LAVA, THEN?

R [with determination]: “Dear Justin, Alice (or name pending), Liam (yay, Liam) and potential Guest.”

G [distorted, too close to the mic]: HELLO, MORTALS! I AM PODCASTING!

L: Shut the fuck up.

R: “...I am an art-restorer by trade, a profession which, I’m sure you know, has its dangers. Apart from the usual face-melting chemicals, we deal with a lot of paintings of dubious provenance, many of which come into our hands with curses or angry spirits attached. It’s a little like working at the humane society. Most of them can be cleaned up and rehabilitated if you’re careful, but a select few will try to kill you. It’s not their fault, but you do always need to be aware of the hazard. For example, the attached image once contained the figure of a little girl who would slowly approach the foreground of the painting over a period of weeks, before crawling out of the frame and attempting to strangle everyone in the room with her shepherd’s crook.”

A: Oh. Yeah. Pretty standard.

L: Get a new bit, ghost children!

G: I TOOK THE FORM OF A DEMONIC LITTLE GIRL ONCE!

A: No one cares.

R: “We gave her a juice box and some crackers, and let her watch a Disney video (Aladdin, but I’m not sure if you can say that)...”

L: Dammit, how many times do we have to tell you? Do not write it if you don’t want Rocz to say it!

A: Was the time he almost finished reciting that Ashanti death curse not enough for you people?

L: You’re just goddamn lucky he mispronounced it!

R: “And now she’s happily attending the local junior high school. A lot of attached spirits are just hungry, or bored, or both, and are easily dealt with. After they’ve lived through a few near-misses like that, some of my colleagues start to become jaded and sloppy. For example, my boss, whom we will call Timothy Q. Jackass (the Q stands for ‘Clueless’)...”

L: Good. Good name.

G: I ONCE GAVE A JACKASS THE GIFT OF PROPHECY!

A: Go away.

G: …HIS NAME WAS TIRESIAS OF THEBES! WHAT? NOTHING? NOBODY?

L: Get some new references.

A: Read another elegy.

G: DO YOU HAVE A RIMSHOT IN HERE…?

A: Touch my laptop and die.

R: “One morning, Mr. Jackass rolled up to the studio with a tinted etching (image not attached for reasons which will become obvious).”

L: Vigo.

A: Fucking Vigo.

G: THAT CARPATHIAN CUNT AND HIS GODDAMN ART COMMISSIONS. NOBODY WANTS TO PAINT YOU, VIGO, NOT WITH THAT HAIRCUT.

[stifled laughter]

G [hopeful]: …OR THOSE SHOES?

A: [clearing throat] Don’t press your luck.

R: “I recognized a certain Carpathian with whom you are no doubt familiar…”

G: HA! YOU CALLED IT!

L: Interrupting is a privilege, and we will mail you a certificate when you have earned it.

R: “...and, of course, I advised Mr. Jackass to douse it in holy oil and set it on fire, as per the established procedure. Imagine my surprise when he told me he wanted me to clean and restore it.”

L: No. Don’t do it.

A: Step away from the abyss.

G: UNIONIZE.

[pause]

G: WHAT? ARE YOU MORTALS FUCKING SCABS?

A: …Alright, I am not autistic — that I know of — but I have no idea how to deal with this situation.

L: You enjoy human suffering but are pro-union?

G: YOU HUMANS WILL TOUCH A CAT’S TOES UNTIL IT BITES YOU OUT OF FRUSTRATION, BUT YOU WILL STILL FEED THEM AND PET THEM.

[pause]

R: Milkshake, Pizza Boy, will you ever forgive me?

M: Lo mismo ocurre con nosotros, cuando os enseñamos el culo antes del amanecer.

R: Is that a yes?

A: All I know is how to order a beer and ceviche…

L: Rocz, for God’s sake, finish the letter so we can get in my van and go home.

R: “I told Mr. Jackass what he could do with his etching, in language that is not very podcast-friendly, and he replied, and I quote, ‘Don’t be a pussy, it’s just an etching. It’s probably Latvian or some shit.’”

G: VIGO THE LATVIAN MAKES A DAMN FINE BLOOD SAUSAGE.

[stifled laughter, a certain amount of snickering]

G [wounded]: WHAT? I AM BEING SERIOUS. SAY WHAT YOU LIKE ABOUT JELLYFISH AND CEPHALOPODS, BUT IF YOU COME AT VIGO THE LATVIAN’S BLOOD SAUSAGE, I WILL END YOU.

[hysterical cackling, even from the cats]

A: Oh, God, oh, fuck no… Xe tried to kill us!

L: And xe’s doin’ it again!

R: It’s called catharsis, Alice! Laugh or cry!

[pandemonium ending in sniffles]

R: Ah… Ah… Oh, God… Lemme see here… “I reiterated my refusal, forcefully, and Mr. Jackass decided he’d teach me a lesson by restoring the etching himself. The next few weeks were remarkably quiet, with regards to Mr. Jackass, save for occasional instances of chanting. He rarely left his office and appeared to be sleeping there. He was also going through a lot of black candles. There was a single attempt to order ‘an unsullied infant boy’ from DoorDash, which was not successful. The next day, Mr. Jackass called in sick, so I figured he was at the exorcist’s and that would be the end of it. Imagine my surprise when I turned on the six o’clock news and found him declaring his candidacy for City Comptroller. From what I could gather, his platform included human sacrifice and a ‘skull throne tax.’ I had my hand on the phone to call an exorcist and report him, but my mean streak got the better of me. ‘Let’s see how this plays out,’ I thought.”

L: Did… Did he win?

R: “Don’t worry. Vigo the Carpathian, running as Mr. Jackass, suffered a resounding defeat and eventual exorcism. However, we restored and reclaimed so many paintings during his extended sabbatical, that before Mr. Jackass even had a chance to dye the blond bleach job out of his hair, the higher ups called him and told him, and I quote, ‘Don’t come back.’ That is how I became head of the art restoration department!”

[cheers, applause]

R: “The moral of this story, if there is one, is, ‘never interrupt your stupid boss when he is making a mistake.’”

G: A MODERN DAY SUN TZU!

R: “Love to you all, and be well.”

A: Aww, that’s actually very nice.

L: I hope Vigo fried that guy’s hair so bad he never recovers.

G: DAMN, I COULD GO FOR SOME BLOOD SAUSAGE.

R: This concludes Safety Third.

[“Shake hands with danger” drop]

R: Does anyone have any commercials?

L: Rocz…

R: Our podcasting format saved the world.

L: Okay, okay, but I got nothin’.

A: Same. You know where you can find us.

L: Right, we live in your basement. We’re watching you right now.

G: SAME!

R: If we want more Gozer the Gozerian, for some reason, where else can we find you?

G: IN YOUR NIGHTMARES!

R: Of course.

[SLIDE: The Amityville Horror House.]

R: Our next episode…

G: OH! OH! WAIT! I ALSO HAVE A TUMBLR!

A: Oh, my God, I have got to get off that hellsite…

R: Our next episode is on the Amityville Horror…

G: OOH, I LOVE THAT ONE! CAN I FIND IT WHEREVER PODCASTS ARE FOUND?

R: Uh…

A [tightly]: Don’t tell xem, just end the episode.

G: WHAT? TELL ME WHAT?

L: End the episode! END IT BEFORE DEVON HITS THE LAVA BUTTON!

G: HI MOM! HI GRANDMA! I LOVE YOU!

[soothing public domain music]

D [not drunk enough to stop being annoyed but still very drunk]: This is Future Devon… Fuck, I mean Present Devon. I have consumed all the liquor and ice cream I demanded from Gozer, and I am going to bed. If, as I suspect, this has all been an epic-length fanfiction from the diseased brain of some individual out there on the internet, when I wake up in the morning, I expect not to exist. This version of me, I mean. So, I would just like to take this opportunity to say: Fuck you. You will die alone. The pet raven in no way makes up for any of this bullshit — although I cherish him and have named him after Sir Ian McKellen. All these fucking Chekov’s guns all over the place, and you didn’t let me use my lava button even once. I will never forgive you for this. I am so done with podcasting, and everything Sumerian, but apparently I still have several billion years of Kill James Bond to go. [sigh] Okay.

[shuffling, sound of a laptop closing]

D: Come on, Sir Ian, let’s go to oblivion.

[long pause]

SIR IAN (I): This is Sir Ian, I am the raven who is talking now, my pronouns are he and him, and I thought you’d all like to know I work for Pazuzu. Don’t tell Dev, it would only upset them. I suppose I’ll put this up on the Patreon for them…?

[click]

[END OF TRANSCRIPT]

[And if ya liked that, I got a whole serialized story for ya. You let me work with my own characters and I get even more unhinged, just so's ya know.]

Thanks for reading!

[edupunkn00b]

Chapters: 15/15 Fandom: Sanders Sides (Web Series) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders Characters: Deceit | Janus Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sleep | Remy Sanders, Kelly Croft - OC, Arizona Tate - OC, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Human, Homophobia, Developing Relationship, Developing Friendships, Abusive Relationships, Swearing, Janus likes to swear, Platonic Loceit, Slow Burn, Roceit - Freeform, himbros, Creativitwins, Angst, i swear to logic there is eventual comfort, and occassional fluffy scenes Series: Part 2 of Logan, Janus, Roman, Remus Summary:

It's 2001, Seattle, Washington.

Janus Pater has fought every obstacle - literally and figuratively - to survive as long as he has. Logan Croft is a young father and is married to his old college girlfriend, Kelly. Their law professor's flippant partner assignment has forced these two disparately orbiting men together.

Roman and Remus Prince are sophomores at the associated undergraduate college. To their fellow students, they're identical, however they approach life and solve their problems in very different ways.

Somehow, (most of) their paths cross in one way or another. Buckle up, because it's a bumpy ride.

Playlist for this story is on Spotify.

[newsworth]

     @tahitiwoke said:   five times kissed 🔪🔪 but maybe platonic besties 🔪🔪 or maybe not 🔪🔪

one.    of all the ways for them to make their snl debut,  this wouldn’t be chris’s first choice.   there’s fleeting moments that tease towards a bit more sophisticated humor and chris catches himself fighting a smile once or twice,   but it’s primarily meant to be an on the nose commentary on claire hale leading what kate mckinnon dressed as a reporter refers to as “ most operatically horny display in politics since the clinton administration, “  with overdrawn silences made less silent by the rousing laughter of the audience as the sexual tension builds in time with the music.  

the tightly framed close ups of suggestive looks amount to the guest star who’s meant to be phil  ( what he lacks in resemblance he makes up for with the same enthusiasm he’d brought to his lip sync battle,  which chris had thought done britney some real justice )  grabbing colin jost by a tie that chris would have never worn on his neck in real life ,   and ...    

“  wow.  “   chris’s voice startles the trio of chuckling interns into slamming down on the space bar of the keyboard and pausing the youtube clip of the sketch right as they start to see some tongue.   “  they’re really going for it.  “   the three of them turn,  red faced and apologizing throughout the coughing fit that had become of their laughter,  just in time to catch phil’s approach at chris’s shoulder.    “  hey.   you catch this?  “   chris says to him and watches every stage of grief pass across the each of the interns face as they part to make space for phil’s looming figure to lean in towards the computer screen.   a few moments pass before the chief of staff says anything,   and when he does,  it’s only to complain:   that guy doesn’t look anything like me. 

two.    “  holy shit!  “   chris’s hand took what slack it could find at the front of phil’s shirt and wound it tightly into his fist.   it’s a one hander,  a downcourt hail mary that sinks the net at the last stroke of midnight.   the sound of the buzzer through the tv is eclipsed by the uproar of that becomes of the bar.

now,   phil doesn’t give as much of a shit about basketball,  and chris is mindful enough of that to feel a little grateful that his truimph is enough to propel them both off of their barstools.  his smile catches the apple of phil’s cheek with a celebratory smack as peanut shells rain down like wedding rice.

three.  there’s a prickliness in phil’s broody mumbling that is usually reserved for things that fall under the claire and i had a fight category,   which chris has expressed in the past is hard for him to be entirely objective about so there’s just shit phil doesn’t bring up to him.  shit that chris doesn’t feel secure enough in their friendship to run the risk of repeating that two week long freeze out by prying after.   

whatever it was this time had phil’s near drunken deadweight hanging off of chris’s side in a way that was painfully awkward with their height disparity.   they’d barely made it through chris’s front door and the trek from the foyer to the bedroom felt miles long.  one step down,  twenty more to go,  and phil’s body was already swaying its weight onto his outside foot,  almost sending them into the console table where chris had just deposited his keys.  

“  you have to work with me here,  phil.  “    chris said.   

phil straightened his spine and shaded his brow under a two finger salute before using the full extent of his ungodly fucking height to survey the area.  “  this isn’t my place.  “   “  nothing gets past you.  “   chris bent down to help phil step out of his shoes.   “  mine was closer.  “   there was a turning point where phil stopped being consoled by the top gun soundtrack and got fussier the longer he had to sit in the car,   so chris made an executive decision.  there was some back and forth about whether or not phil was going to let chris offer him the bed that got settled by chris having to swear on someone’s grave  ( he gets the feeling that phil just picked a name,  any name,  because they don’t have a tonya in common )   that he really did like sleeping on his own couch.   then,  mercifully,   phil planted face first into the mattress.  at first it seemed as though he fell asleep in that same instant,  but then he groaned at the sound of chris’s wastebasket sliding across the floor towards the head of the bed.   “  i won’t throw up.  “  “  just don’t do it on my bed.  “    “  i will not throw up.  “    “  i believe you.  “   that doesn’t even sound true to chris’s own ears.   “  bathrooms through that door.  “   something phil already knows,  but a reminder can’t hurt.   “  there’s water and an aspirin on the nightstand.   i’ll be up for a while.  come get me if you need something.  “   he’s almost out the bedroom door.   “  chris?  “   phil lifts himself up onto his arms and turns to look at chris from over his shoulder. “  yeah?  “ they sit there for a moment,  phil’s expression softly obscured under the darkness but with one eye narrowing against the glow of the street light coming in from the window.  chris waits,  and he realizes he might wait all night if phil needed him to even if he would never let phil do the same for him.  what he gets in return for his patience is phil’s sloppy grin turning into an air kiss,  a wink.

that was a little too cute for chris not to grin back.  he catches the kiss with one hand and tucks the gesture in his back pocket with a wink of his own before turning the light back off.   “  sleep tight,  maverick.  “   “  g’night,  goose.  “ you shake my nerves and you rattle my brain.  even after he closes the door,  chris can hear him humming into the pillow.   too much love drives a man insane.   four.   "  what is it about your attraction to phil coulson that makes you uncomfortable?  “ dr. garrick is stoutly built.   his face has aged into a perpetual frown of intense contemplation over a set of deep set eyes that glister with their acquired intelligence and curiosity for more,   and he’s been chris’s therapist since the shooting in dallas a few years ago.   something about garrick reminds chris of his grandfather,  a man he’s never met in the flesh and only knows through the stories told by his mother from before she’d run away from home.   connecting with a therapist is not something that came very easily to him.   it was a great deal of trial and error for garrick and him get to the point where they are now. “  when i say attraction ...     i’m not speaking of a strictly sexual,   or physical attraction at all.  “   garrick clarifies with a wave of his hand.   “  the ...    incident you’re describing sounds a little more complicated than that.  “ the panic attack had come out of nowhere.  in the dark of his office he’d found the empty cave he’d made of the back of cassidy’s head,   claire’s face slack and empty through a stain glass mosaic of blood and bone,   only she couldn’t see him back.   the air was no good and sour as it left his lungs in scatters until phil set his hand on chris’s chest and willed his breathing towards a measure of five beats with the low steadiness of his voice.   cassidy’s been dead for almost two years.   he doesn’t know why the image of him had suddenly come back like that,  or what had warmly turned his mind away from that lapse in reality when phil settled him with a stare.   some of the details had to rearranged in his admission to garrick,  obviously,  but chris was better at omission than he had been before he took the job at the white house. 

the couch in garrick’s office reminds chris of the one he has in his living room at home.  the yield of the leather is right at that sweet spot that he appreciates but getting comfortable still feels like something he’s having to talk himself into.   as the moments continue to pass without much of anything offered from chris’s side of the room,   garrick shifts in his chair,   resting his hand on the knee that crosses over the other.   the notepad he uses is a ridiculously tiny thing that fits entirely in his palm.   one of those richly green,  tactical notebooks that doesn’t hold more than a hundred sheets,  and chris has only seen him write anything inside it a handful of times.

“  hearing you talk about it,   i’m reminded of..    other times you’ve expressed a struggle to identify the,   um ...   i think you described it as the thrill of your own vulnerability,  the intention behind it.  “ chris becomes reminded of them too,  even before garrick recalls them aloud.   “  the nature of your relationship with audrey shifted quite ...   dramatically,  because you had allowed her further into your life when you felt no judgement from her for your relapse.   we haven’t discussed it very much but i think you had a similar experience with your friend,   grace?  “

“  i’ve never wanted to sleep with grace.  “  giving garrick claire’s real name wasn’t an option when they started to broach certain discussions that fell outside of the realm of the assassination attempt,  and he was obviously quite limited in his ability to be perfectly candid about how much deeper their relationship ran than what was easily explainable.   easy isn’t the point of therapy.   he knows that.   garrick knew as much as chris felt he could safely tell him and still yield what he considered to be useable results. “  keep in mind that a desire for intimacy doesn’t start or stop at sex,   chris,   but grace is another situation where you were drawn to the security of having not been rejected for having allowed yourself to be seen in a certain light that you don’t typically afford to people.  “   again,   chris falls silent,  pensively chewing on the inside of his cheek as though that was where he was meant to find the truth inside that morsel of thought,  so garrick continues.   “  it may be difficult to make that distinction if most other times you’ve faced a situation like this has been with someone who had those certain expectations of you afterwards,   the way audrey did.   but i think that’s a fairer estimation of what you’re struggling with,   here.  “   

he knows how much garrick hates to be the one doing all the talking during these sessions,   how counterproductive it is to the whole point and moreso a waste of three hundred dollars for the hour,   so chris clears his throat.  “  that makes sense.  “   he scratches at a phantom itch of the word seen where it sits just behind his ear.   “  it was just ...   it felt really intimate.   when we locked eyes.  “   

“  that’s not surprising.   you’re familiar with the expression that the eyes are the window to the soul.  i like to consider how the optic nerves serve as something of a natural extension of the brain.  that when two people are capable of looking at each other while willingly stripping themselves of their private defenses,   it’s something like ...   a kiss between two minds.   a very vulnerable experience.  “   

with a look,  garrick reminds him of the rarity of chris allowing himself that experience.   the clock on the guitar pick table clicks to indicate that they only have a few minutes left of their session,  which is usually when garrick prefers to turn the conversation towards a lighter mood so that chris doesn’t leave the office with a tremendous weight over his head.

“  phil sounds like he’s a good friend,   when you let him be.  “ 

that’s why you called me and not the cops. 

“  he is.  “

five.   “  as always i’ve got chris,  meech,  and scott.  “   says phil from behind him.  chris turns just in time to catch a bounce pass and tucks the ball under his arm.   the sun hangs directly over their heads so their shadows don’t stretch very far across the asphalt.  one of the interns who they can always count on being goaded into a game of pick up puts enough stretch into his lunge to make chris smile despite how unwell he feels.  “  i think i’m gonna sit this one out.  “   he says and passes the ball back to phil.   waves off the look of interest he meets on ed’s face.   “  its hot.  i’m tired.  “  there had been a brief discussion earlier in the day about how little sleep chris had gotten the night before.   that may be why phil doesn’t fight him.

“  you can be our cheerleader.  “   phil says.  “  shame you don’t still have the skirt.  “

“  what makes you think i don’t have the skirt?  “    phil pauses mid jump shot,  and chris meets his eye from over the textured curve of the basketball.   “  don’t toy with me,  brady.  “  chris blows back that kiss he’d been saving in his back pocket.   phil takes one hand off the basketball to catch it in mid air with a wink and uses it put a little umph into the three pointer that the intern makes a comment about it absolutely not counting.