#k reads

[kitkatpancakestack]

Damn ok this book can kinda eat??? I really didn't expect to like it as much as I do

[hermioneswifeee]

i can’t remember the last time i was truly brought to tears reading something but here i am.

TJ Klune you genius

[gigantomachylesbian]

Grey Dog by Elliott Gish is my favorite horror I've read this year for sure!!! It's one of those books that's so up my alley and has so many things I love that it feels like it was handcrafted for me personally >:^) I really recommend it if you like historical horror, especially with natural themes. Plus just look at this cover!!!

Also it felt like a perfect blend of the songs Gigantomachy by cake bake betty and animal fear by marika hackman in case anyone has the same exact music taste as me

[somewhere--in-between]

At the same time, let us not forget that the system is made significantly more effective by state ownership and central direction of all the means of production. This gives the power structure an unprecedented and uncontrollable capacity to invest in itself (in the areas of the bureaucracy and the police, for example) and makes it easier for that structure, as the sole employer, to manipulate the day-to-day existence of all citizens.

The Power of the Powerless by Vaclav Havel. Section II. (1978)

[frakensteinapologist]

So far Authority is so vastly different from Annihilation but I feel like it works. It still is very much in the same world and it is continuing the story just from a different perspective.

Yeah there isn’t as much fucked up swamp/forest lands, however there is something so delicious about things being fucked up underneath the surface and the character knows it and the audience knows it but the character doesn’t see how much they themselves are changing and being changed by it. Why the hell does Control keep smelling rotten honey? why does he not think anything of it? Those are the questions that we are going to get answered.

[thatndginger]

Dysthanesia Read-Thru Pt 1

oh yeah. this is happening. @ceph-the-ghost-writer I am only mildly sorry

---

-lmaaooo the phrases. death hickeys. interstate pancake.

-dunno why but i always enjoy the use of the word 'trussed'

-is it bad that i find fictional characters who genially commit violence kinda hot??

"Isaac Soto rode to his doom not with a roar or a whimper but a snore."

[louisminyard]

[ynnu-64]

Tears in my togachaco eyes ,,,

[cult-of-the-eye]

I love how intricate asexuality can be. No sex at all? Sure! Just want to watch? Brilliant! Only comfortable with topping? You go girl! Only rarely feel aroused and when you do it's very touch and go? Wonderful! Kinky but not in a sex way? Coolio! Queerness is full of nuance and people are complicated and things never live in a vacuum!!

[shigeoreum]

Loved how the answers to V’ger and Spock’s question of “Is this all that I am?” lie in such human concepts of love, acceptance, union. The completion of their sense of selves are not dependent on the two men, but rather so much more fulfilling, real, and tangible through loving them and everything that comes with doing so.

Side note: love being a want or need for union is a philosophical take i don’t 100% agree with (narratively speaking it’s so romantic, though, especially in this movie’s context LOL), but Marilyn Friedman’s twist on love as more of a separate, “third” unified entity (a federation of the lovers’ selves) was fun to think about ^_^

[gigantomachylesbian]

To Shape a Dragon's Breath was very good, it was the rare YA book that didn't overly read like YA fantasy in terms of style and didn't make me feel like I was being talked down to as a reader, but still felt very accessible. It's a book that I both really loved reading as an adult and made me feel connected with my younger self and my consistent passion for dragons, and is a book I would love to share with some younger cousins because I'm sure it could be even more meaningful to them. Just a compelling, touching, enjoyable read :^) I definitely recommend either reading this one yourself and/or gifting it to any teens in your life!

[somewhere--in-between]

The goal of asceticism is something absolutely positive: the attainment of love, of purity of heart.

Heaven Begins Within You: Wisdom of the Desert Fathers by Anselm Gruen. Chapter Four: Asceticism, pg. 47.

[ascendingtostardust]

Andante, Andante

Pairing: Sam Kiszka x Reader

Warnings: None, just some mutual pining, some flirting and kissing.

WC: 1457

A/N: This came to me while I was driving around the other day and the song came on. I immediately drifted off into a maladaptive daydream with Sam, so please enjoy!

You liked to keep your home peaceful, tranquil, and calm. Little noise if possible. But this afternoon, it was filled with the sounds of learning. A keyboard you bought secondhand at a garage sale propped up on a stand in front of you, you and your friend Sam sharing the small bench as best as possible. Your fingers plunked down on the plastic keys, a few sour notes and a groan from you echoing in the house.

“You’re doing good, don’t worry.” Sam gave you a supportive smile.

“I hate this.” was all you replied, removing your hands from the instrument and pouting. “Why did I even want to do this?”

You knew why. At the beginning of the year, you’d softly mentioned to Sam you wanted to learn to read music, and play an instrument, as a New Year’s resolution. You were tired of being the only person in your friend group without a lick of musical talent, and feeling left out of conversation.

Sam took off running with the idea, of course. While finishing up tour, he had sent you package after package of books on music theory, reading music for dummies, and songbooks and a few pedals for your keyboard.

“Hey, I was just as bad when I started learning.” Sam tried to soothe you, running his large, warm hand up and down your back gently.

“You had the advantage of being a kid and having a brain ripe for molding. I’m old, Sam. Ancient. My mid-twenties brain is fully formed and refuses.”

“You are never too old to learn something new.” Sam chided with a click of his tongue behind his teeth. “Why don’t we try vocabulary? You’ve always been good with words.”

“I guess.” You muttered. Sam picked up one of the books by his feet, flipping through it.

“Ah, here’s an easy one. Forte?”

“Forte means loud.” you answered. Sam grinned, nodding.

“Good, good. Can you use it in a sentence for me?” Sam asked. You sighed through your nose, trying to put together something on the fly.

“Your brother Josh enters the room in a forte manner.” you giggled, remembering the last time you saw the elder Kiszka, how he burst into the room with a bottle of wine in his hand for the dinner party.

“Valid.” Sam hummed. “Piano?”

“Soft. When we talk shit about people, our voices are very piano.” you gently tapped a key, letting the soft sound vibrate out of the speaker. “Also your hair looks very piano today.” Sam blushed, clearing his throat at your compliment.

“Thanks.”

“I mean it, your hair looks good. I like it long.” you continued. You had always had a crush on Sam. He was the funny smart guy, who looked like a 70s dreamboat. You had been devastated, secretly of course, when he cut his hair a few years ago, but now that it had grown out, you were going to make sure to remind him of how good it looked any chance you got.

“I missed it being long.” Sam replied quietly, twirling his ends around his finger. Unbeknownst to you, Sam had found out through your sometimes-confidant, Jake, that you preferred his longer hair shortly after the cut, and vowed to himself grow it back. For you. He had only gotten his hair cut short to change it up, and maybe to try and get you to notice him. He thought that if he did something drastic it would be like the movies, you’d suddenly notice he was right in front of you all along. And yet, neither of you had made a single move.

“I did too.” you admitted, reaching up and running your hands through his hair, pushing it back out of his face. “I missed braiding it during movie nights.” Sam closed his eyes at the push of your fingertips through his hair, the gentle scratch of your nails against his scalp. The sound of Rosie somewhere in the house, shaking and clattering her tags broke the moment, and Sam shifted in his seat, looking back down at the book.

"Um okay, uh...how about leggiero?" Sam glanced up at you, a slight, pink blush creeping across his cheeks. You paused, your eyes scanning through an invisible book in the air in front of you as you racked your brain for the correct answer.

"Oh! Light and graceful, something I am definitely not." you chuckled under your breath. Sam felt a sudden surge through his chest. In his eyes, everything you did was graceful. You sipped your drinks with grace, walked down the street with grace, even when he was following close behind when you were tipsy and walking to the car. Hell, you even tripped, slipped and fell gracefully.

"You don't see yourself how others do." Sam's eyes widened as he realized he said it out loud, and your head whipped around to face him.

"What do you mean, Sam?" you asked softly, gazing up at him. He could pretend he didn't say it, try and move on and quiz you on more musical directions, but something in his gut told him to double down. Finally tell you how he felt about you.

"I mean, you're amazing. You keep saying you're not good at things or you're clumsy, but you don't see all the ways you dance through life. Your laugh is one of my favorite sounds ever, and when you walk into a room, the vibe changes, it becomes lighter, more vibrant. I fall in love with you over and over again every time I see you."

"You-you what?" throat feeling tight, you thought you'd misheard Sam. Surely the man who'd been the object of you affections for the past few years didn't just admit he had feelings for you.

"I-um, I..." Sam's cheeks were on fire now, he licked his lips nervously as he tried to gauge your reaction through your shock. Before he could speak again, your lips were on his. Both of you froze for a moment, but once his hands cupped your face, you felt yourself melt into him, the awkward twist of you bodies on the small bench not mattering as the two of you lost yourselves.

When the heat of the moment waned and the two of you finally pulled apart, you rested your forehead against his.

"Well, that was very espressivo." Sam chuckled, swiping his thumb across the apple of your cheek as you giggled. You gave him another peck.

"It's hard not to be expressive when your crush tells you how much they like you." you replied.

"Maybe this is how we should practice more often." Sam suggested.

"Hmm? Making out?" you hummed with another giggle.

"In a way. I'll ask you a direction, and you show me with a kiss." Sam smirked. "Like this. Staccato." you bit your bottom lip as you thought, not being able to figure out the word. You frowned, shaking your head and Sam just smiled, leaning over and pressing short, quick kisses all over your face making you laugh while his facial hair tickled your soft skin.

"Ooh I like it better when you show me." you told him. "Can you jog my memory on andante?" Sam's smirk grew as he cupped your face, bringing you in for a slow, passionate kiss. He let his fingers tangle in your hair as one of your hands rested on his thigh, fingers digging into the jean-clad limb as his tongue softly lapped with yours.

"Now," he sighed when he finally pulled away. "That was a gimmie, because I happen to know one of your favorite songs is Andante, Andante by Abba." you gave him an innocent shrug, batting your eyes.

"Get used to it, Sam." you whispered, still not have having enough of his lips as you kissed him again. "I'm gonna use every excuse in the book to kiss you from now on."

"You don't ever need an excuse again." he mumbled against your lips. "I'll kiss you from sun up til sun down, and as long as the moon is in the sky."

"We should invest in some lip balm and mouthwash then, huh?" Sam laughed and agreed. Scratching his chin, he thought for a moment.

"You know, it's getting close to dinner time, what do you say we go out for a bite?" you found yourself nodding instantly, letting him help you up from the bench.

"Then after, we can come back and practice piano? You can teach me some more?" you asked as you followed Sam towards your front door and the shoe rack. He turned suddenly and wrapped his arms around you, swaying you.

"Oh sweet thing, I plan on teaching you piano all night."

Taglist:

@joshsindigostreak @lvnterninthenight @allieisacrybaby @xserenax-13 @sarakay-gvf @shutupdevvie @myownparadise96 @watchingovergvf2 @gretavanfleetposts @sacredthefran @josiee-gvf @highdefkiszka @ascendingtostardust @joshkiszkatoothgap @andeejoness @gardensgatedaisy @kkdarling @demonrat444 @teddiie @writingcold @dannyandthekiszkas @gretavanbestie @lightmylove-gvf @tearsofbri @paleshadow-ofadragon @gretavanslut @streamsofstardust @joshkiszkas @jakewhorecore @fictional-duchess @like-a-woman-in-a-dream @starshine-wagner @objectsinspvce @josh-iamyour-mama @mountain-in-springtime @cal-a-bungaa @capturethechaos @sunfl0wer-power @jankandjonch @gvfpal @allybjt @hippievanfleet @weightofbrokenbells @joshkiszkasbadussy @malany-gvf @ruby0antlers @samofthedawn

[drabsyo]

me? shipping another rare pair wlw in a fandom i'm 16 yrs late to? just another tuesday

[gigantomachylesbian]

For the Book Ask: 12, 17 & 30? Ngl I'm currently in a book slump so that q stood out to me! I absolutely love all these qs and had to stop myself asking you like six of them :-)

12-A book or series you wish you could read over for the first time? Honestly, the main one that comes to mind is Eragon or the whole Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paolini. Part of this is because I really need to reread the series in general (I finished them in Elementary school and haven't gone back to them since, and I'm sure I'd understand and enjoy them even more now!), but also these books played a huge role in getting me into high fantasy and really cementing my love of dragons and the like; I really feel like I owe them a lot :'^)

17. A book to get you out of a reading slump? My best pick for this is Mexican Gothic! I basically finished this whole book in a day, it really drew me in and held my attention very well--and I haven't actually met anyone who's read this one who hasn't enjoyed it, regardless of if you like horror or not. Both me (huge horror fan) and my mom (thinks horror is the devil) loved it, and it's a pretty fast read! Some other short, attention-grabbing books I might recommend are This is How You Lose the Time War for sci-fi, or Little Thieves by Margaret Owen if you want a fast-paced, pretty compelling YA fantasy. Also I did read Mexican Gothic immediately after I'd slogged my way through Iron Widow (a book I really didn't enjoy tbh), and it felt like a breath of fresh air and got me back to being hyped about reading!

30. Give any 3 book recs to your followers! Putting a cut here because I realize this got away from me a bit.

To try and get some ones I haven't talked (much) about here before:

The Devourers by Indra Das. Werewolves, babey! Set in India, this novel follows an academic who meets a strange man one night who compels him through vivid, almost hypnotizing stories, claims to be a werewolf, and then gives him a book apparently bound in human skin to transcribe. It alternates between the professor interacting more with the supposed werewolf and the text he's transcribing, about a young woman encountering werewolves in the distant past. Rich and full of lush descriptions, themes of storytelling and history, revenge and romance--I loved this one! Checks the monster-romance box off for me, though the romance is far from the primary focus.

All the White Spaces by Ally Wilkes. This historical horror is about a young transgender man who stows away on an exploratory ship headed for the far reaches of Antarctica. Although this gives him his first taste of freedom and being accepted as a man amongst the crew, the voyage quickly goes wrong (yes), stranding the crew in the inhospitable, deadly landscape with little in the way of supplies (yes!). With the impending weight of winter's pitch-darkness settling in, the crew begins working together to survive, but suspicions between crewmates grow, the isolation presses in, and worst of all, there just might be something out there in that cold, empty landscape, waiting for them (yes!!!!). I love horror about deeply uninhabitable places I LOVE when things are going so so so wrong on some kind of mission <3 Great horror, very spooky, and super compelling characters! I liked Jonathan so much.

Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh. This sci-fi standalone follows Kyr, one of the top fighters in the last community of surviving humans after Earth was destroyed in an inter-galactic war. Raised to be a soldier, her only goal is to become a warrior and slaughter the aliens who destroyed her home. Instead, she's assigned to Nursery, to bear children for the genetically enhanced men of the station, while her twin brother is sent off on a doomed mission. Kyr, desperate to escape both their fates, sets off to find him, to prove to her superiors that she's worthy of more than producing more soldiers--but doing so uncovers truths about her world she didn't think possible. To be honest with you I am OBSESSED with Kyr she's so fucked up!!!!! She is a perfect little soldier and is completely, willfully oblivious to the circumstances around her, which of course just serves to make her journey all the more compelling. I love you hyper-competent, stubborn, fucked up women <3 AND she's a twin!!!! (^I'm a twin so this is always a little treat to me). This book definitely focuses more on character journeys and exploring fascist, controlling upbringings than, like, super "hard" sci-fi stuff, but it accomplishes what it sets out to do SO well.

[ascendingtostardust]

Teach Me

pairing: Professor!Sam x 21+ College Student Reader

word count: 3.6k

warnings: drinking, cussing. not much this chapter. let me know if i missed anything!

here we are! part one of Teach Me, my first series!! huge thank you to @malany-gvf as always for reading through this and letting me bounce ideas off of her, i love you lots <3. i hope y’all enjoy this :))

————————————

This was it, your last year of undergrad. You have been majoring in Plant Biology at the University of Michigan for the last three years, and tomorrow was the start of your last year. You’ve been enjoying college, but you couldn’t wait to be done with school and actually move on to your desired career field.

Seeing as this was your last year, all students in the major were required to pick an elective with a lab. When you looked over the list before meeting with your advisor you knew immediately which elective you wanted to take.

Forest Ecosystems.

While you already knew about this course from your brother, Sebastian, who was the teaching assistant for the professor who oversaw the class, it jumped out at you because it encapsulated more than just plants. Plants were your main focus, but you were always looking to expand your knowledge. You also took this specific class with Professor Buckley because you had loose connections with the grad student who taught the lab. His older twin brothers were good friends with your brother, and although you never met him, you knew of him. He generally hung around with the twins and Sebastian, and from what you had heard, he was a good guy. Of course you were hoping that maybe in taking his class it would be an easier grade to make, allowing your focus to be on your core subjects. But worrying about classes can start tomorrow.

Now was the time for drinking.

You were currently at one of the local bars in the small town your school resided in. Although it was a Sunday night, every bar on the strip was packed with students who were either hammered or getting there, and trying to enjoy their last night of full freedom. You and your three roommates were no different amongst your peers. Each of you had been fairly buzzed before even making the short walk from your house to the first stop of the night.

There was always a routine when the four of you went out to the bars. It was the same rotation of bars every time and it never changed. You would start the night at one of the bars that was fairly calm, but still had your ears feeling full by the time you left. By the end of the night you were on a dance floor, shoulder to shoulder with random people, jam packed tight like sardines in a can.

It was the point in the night where your group would visit the bar with the large outdoor space. This particular bar was always in the middle of the rotation just because it allowed everyone to breathe and actually talk. The music outside this bar was never particularly loud like the music at the other places. You could always have a moment here to drink water, along with whatever the poison of the night was, and enjoy conversations with your roommates.

“I’ll grab this round, meet y’all at the table?” You took your I.D. from the bouncer and walked further into the building, where your roommates stopped and waited for you.

“Yeah, for sure. I’ll take a tequila soda please!” Chloe always ordered tequila sodas from this bar in particular. She claimed you actually got ‘bang for your buck’ as they always over-poured. You knew better than that though. The bartender had a major crush on Chloe and always gave her a little extra.

“You know what I want, I’m gonna hit the can. I have to piss like a racehorse.” Sadie walked away before you could say anything else. She wasn’t wrong though, you did know what she wanted. Her drink of choice here was a Budweiser, but specifically the bottle. Sadie was a country girl through and through, and she had the accent as well as the ‘to hell with you’ attitude to match. She was a sweet girl, and one of your closest friends, but she was definitely a firecracker.

“I’ll take a vodka redbull and I’ll go grab the waters.” Macie, who you were closest with, spoke up beside you over the loud music. Her drink of choice always changed depending on her mood. Vodka redbull was her go-to when she was on the tail end of her buzz and needed a pick-me-up. To be fair she had driven back in today from her home state, so it was expected of her to be tired.

“Alright see y’all in a few.” With that you headed to the bar, Macie went to the end of the bar where the jug of water and stack of cups sat, and Chloe made her way outside to snag your table.

There were people everywhere. You almost couldn’t see the bar top, but this was to be expected. It was also the reason why only one of you would go to buy everyone’s drinks. Weaving your way in and out of people was much easier when there is only one of you, and usually people didn’t mind letting you cut if they just saw one person. Unfortunately for them they didn’t realize you were ordering more than two drinks until it was too late.

You began moving your body in and out of the swarm of people surrounding the bar. You were looking for people who weren’t paying much attention, and men. Men always had a soft spot for a single female struggling to make her way up to the bartender. And boy did you use it to your advantage.

Just as you always did, you found your target. A group of guys were standing around and chatting away while they waited at the bar. It was time to worm your way in there.

“Hi, excuse me, would it be alright if I stood next to you? I’ve been trying to get up here for ages, but I can’t get through!” You lied right through the pleading look on your face. Luckily for you, this group of guys were already well into their night of drinking.

“Oh yeah! Sure thing! Hey, Dustin, move the fuck down so the lady can get in here!” The guy slurred over to his friend. If he hadn’t been leaning up against the bar he definitely would’ve been swaying.

A moment later an opening appeared along the sticky, wooden top. You squeezed your body into the space and leaned your weight against it on your forearms.

“So what’re you drinking?” The man next you slurred out again, the smell of beer pungent on his breath. It took everything in you not to gag.

“Oh I’m not,” You smiled at him, pushing down the urge to vomit on his shoes due to the distillery wafting from his mouth, “I’m just grabbing my boyfriend another drink!”

Another lie. You were definitely single, but you didn’t want him to know that. The word ‘boyfriend’ usually made guys back off, especially at the bar.

The guy just muttered a ‘Damn’ under his breath and wished you a goodnight. You thanked him for the bar space and did the same. Returning your attention back to the bar, you waited for a bartender to meet your eye so you could order. Thankfully you didn’t have to wait long before a bartender wandered up to you and you placed your order.

“Lying isn’t always the best way to get what you want, ya know? It’s deceiving.” The voice of a man came from your left, and you turned your head to meet the man who spoke. You looked him over, struck by how beautiful he was.

“Well I think it turned out quite well in my favor. As for it being deceiving, isn’t that the whole point of a lie? Besides, how would you know I was lying?” Your lips pulled upwards into a crooked grin, amusement in your eyes.

He was fairly tall, about 5’10, with long chocolate brown hair pulled into a loose bun, and a thick, but short, goatee. His eyes were also brown, but were layered with different shades and they turned downwards in a way that almost made him look sad had he not been smiling.

“It indeed turned out well in your favor, it landed you next to me.” His eyebrows shot up in a playful way, his smile expanding. As you went to respond, the bartender placed the drinks you ordered in front of you along with your receipt and a pen. You grabbed the pen and signed the thin, and now wet, paper.

“And to answer your other question,” You turned back to him as he spoke and you set the pen on top of the receipt and slid it to the bartender, “Maybe you caught my eye the moment you walked in with your friends.”

You gathered the drinks in your hand as best you could and met his eyes once more. “Well then, allow me to catch your eye again as I walk away.”

You shot him a wink with a wide smile before walking outside to join your group. Just before you made it around the corner you glanced back at him. You were not surprised to find his eyes tracking you through the sea of bodies. He raised his beer to you and dipped his head down slightly, smirking before taking a sip. You nodded back to him, and disappeared around the corner.

When you made it to the table to join the rest of the girls, you didn’t bother mentioning the interaction. They would only force you to go back and talk to him, try and get his number or hook up with him for the night. Not that you were necessarily opposed to any of those, but tonight was solely about you and your girls. You wanted to keep it that way.

--------------------------------------------------

The night finally came to an end at 2am in which every bar closed down on the strip. Sadie led the way out the door, fighting the crowd of people with your hand in hers. Macie was holding your left hand, and Chloe was holding Macie’s left hand at the back of the group. When the group had made it outside, you all started to walk in the direction of your house. It was about a fifteen minute walk, so instead of paying for an Uber the four of you always just walked to and from the bars.

On the walk back you thought about how you hadn’t seen the beautiful man from that one bar the rest of the night. You wondered if maybe that was the only one he went to, or maybe the two of you just never crossed paths again at the others. Pity. He was very attractive, and you kind of kicked yourself for not at least getting his number.

“I didn’t tell y’all this, but I met a guy tonight while I was buying our drinks at Murphy’s earlier.” You and Macie were still holding hands, your arms swinging back and forth between your bodies as you walked.

“Oh? Do tell.” Chloe, who was in front of you, turned around to face you, walking backwards. Sadie continued to walk straight ahead next to her, but chimed in as well.

“Ooooo yes, please share.”

“I walked up to a group of drunk guys and asked if I could stand next to them at the bar because I had been waiting forever, which of course was a lie. After they made room the guy I had talked to asked what I was drinking, and I lied and said I was grabbing my boyfriend another drink, and he left me alone.”

“That’s it?” Macie turned her head to look at you, your arms still swinging.

“No.” You laughed at her impatience, shaking your head slightly. You told them about your short conversation with the man and before any of you knew it, the four of you had arrived home. Sadie took out her keys and unlocked the door, leading the way inside.

“So was he cute?” Macie continued to follow you up the stairs to your room. You knew she would want more information.

“Yeah he was cute. He was also just very like… I don’t know, pretty?”

“Pretty?” She plopped down on your bed while you made your way into your bathroom for makeup wipes.

“Yeah. Like he was attractive of course, but I’ve never seen a man so beautiful.”

You took your makeup off and washed your face while you and Macie switched subjects and chatted about your schedules for tomorrow. Macie was an Animal Science major taking the pre-vet route meaning neither of you had any classes together, and between the two of you, her last year was busier than yours.

“My first class is at 10:30 and I’m out at 4 on Mondays, but Wednesdays I have a lab that goes until 6.” She was now standing in your doorway leaning up against the wooden frame as she caught you up on her class schedule.

“That’s not entirely awful. I go in at 10 on Mondays and Wednesdays and I’m done at 3. However, on Tuesdays and Thursdays I go in at 9 for my elective course, but thankfully the lab is immediately after.”

“Oh yeah, that’s not half bad either.”

The two of you didn’t talk much longer, the clock nearing 3am. She bid you goodnight and shut your bedroom door while you rummaged through your drawers for comfier clothes to wear. As soon as your head hit the pillow you were out.

---------------------------------------------------

Your first day of classes went well which you expected. Of course every professor that day began their lessons after going over the syllabus, which you also expected. This was a commonality among professors once you started your junior year as they had ‘so much material to get through before the end of the year.’ You didn’t mind though. Getting right to course work helped put you in the mindset you needed to focus. Slacking off early was always your biggest challenge.

On Tuesday you made your way to your only class for the day. Forest Ecosystems, the elective you had chosen. While you did have a lab after the course you considered them to be one long class.

You knew of a few people in your class, but you generally weren’t one to make friends with your classmates per se. Sure you had worked on group projects and assignments with most of them by this point, but you never hung out with any of them outside of class. You were glad to see that one girl you’ve been partnered up with multiple times was in this class and you decided to take the empty seat next to her.

“Hey Jamie, I didn’t know you were taking this course. Mind if I sit here?”

“Oh y/n hey! Yeah go ahead, it's all yours. I figured it could be a fun one to take. I’m glad to see a familiar face here, at least I know who to partner with if we have a group project or something.”

You took the seat beside her and set your backpack on the floor underneath the table. While you waited for the class to start, you and Jamie talked about your classes this semester and plans for after graduation. The two of you were in deep conversation about internships and whatnot when the professor finally walked in to greet the class.

“Good morning everyone, glad to see most of you showed up.” Your head snapped to the front of the room at the sound of his voice. Even without the noise of loud music to accompany it you knew instantly who the voice belonged to. Your eyes landed on the beautiful man from the bar standing at the front of the small lecture room as he greeted the class.

“As many of you can probably tell, I am not Professor Buckley. She is currently on maternity leave as she had her baby just a few days ago, and unfortunately, you are stuck with me this semester.” He was energetic and smiling, just the way he had been at the bar that night.

“I am Sam Kiszka, Professor Buckley’s Grad Student, but you can call me Sam… or Mr. Kiszka, whichever you prefer. I’ll be teaching this course and the lab portion for the semester. Professor Buckley will be joining us at the end of the semester closer to finals.”

You were hung on his every word, his every move as if anything he did was the most interesting thing you had ever witnessed. His eyes hadn’t grazed across you sitting there just yet, but you knew it was only a matter of time before they did.

“There is another professor who teaches this course, so if I am unavailable for whatever reason, or my office hours do not work with your schedule, please go see Dr. Rhone or his grad student, Sebastian. Their office hours, emails, and office locations are provided for you on the syllabus as are mine. Now,” He clapped his hands together as he walked around the desk in the center of the floor, “Attendance for this class is mandatory, yeah I know it sucks, I promise it wasn’t my decision, but it is something I have to do, so let’s move on to that.”

Sam began to read off the list of names, waiting for a response from each person before moving on. He made sure to take notice of each student when they responded, committing the name to memory. He made his way down the list until he called your name.

“Here.” You raised your hand slightly to better grab his attention. When his eyes found you, his smile grew just a fraction wider. He checked off your name, but paused before calling the next student.

“Y/n is it? Any relation to Dr. Rhone’s TA Sebastian?”

“Um yes, actually, he’s my brother.”

“You don’t say. Well glad to have you here, y/n.” He smiled softly at you, his eyes sparkling, and then continued to read off the list of names.

-----------------------------------------------------

The rest of class and the lab went on without a hitch. Except maybe that you couldn’t stop eye-fucking your professor. You spent most of the time daydreaming about him, unable to push the intruding thoughts from your mind. By the end of the lab you were itching to get the hell out there as everything Sam did drove you completely mad.

“Alright, that’s all for today guys, see you Thursday.” Sam concluded the class and tucked his papers away into their folders on his desk. You shoved your notebook and pen into your backpack as quickly as possible, needing to get far away from him.

“Y/n, come see me before you leave please.” His eyes flicked to you and watched as you hurried to pack up. Your heart rate started to pick up, fluttering furiously in your chest. While the other students made their way up the stairs to exit the room, you descended past them.

Sam was still compiling all of his notes and paperwork for the class when you approached his desk. He looked up at you, and then around the room to make sure everyone had left, leaning his weight on his hands that rested on top of the wooden desk.

“I wanted to clear the air with you before we continue on with the semester.” You nodded your head, showing him that he had your attention. “Had I known that you were Sebastian’s little sister or that you were going to be my student I would have never hit on you at the bar. This relationship must be strictly professional.”

You knew he was right. Nothing could ever happen between the two of you while he was your teacher. That didn’t make hearing it sting any less.

“I know, I understand.”

“Do you?” He gave you a questioning look, looking between your eyes, “Because the way you were undressing me with your eyes the entire class says otherwise.” A cocky smirk stretched onto his face as your cheeks flamed, heat creeping up your neck. While you were embarrassed that he noticed, you weren’t about to let him know.

“I was not undress-”

“Oh but you were, and while in any other situation I would’ve welcomed or even encouraged it, but it can’t continue to happen. Not only is it highly inappropriate for anything to occur between us, and it could cost me my job, but your brother would kill me,” He leaned forward leaving minimal distance between the two of you over the desk, “And when you look at me like that I can’t find either of those good enough reasons to not do something about it.”

Nothing could hide the shocked expression on your face. It was not shocking that he was attracted to you, you knew that from the bar, but it was shocking to you that he seemed to be struggling to hold himself back. It was shocking that you were the one testing his limits. And that was incredibly hot. You couldn’t deny the way his words had seeped warmth throughout your core.

Before you had the chance to say anything else, students began to trickle in for the next class. He stood up and cross his arms over his chest. It was your turn to wear a smirk as you waved your fingers at him in goodbye.

“See you Thursday, Mr. Kiszka.” His name rolled off your tongue dripping in sweet, yet smug, desire.

You didn’t turn around to look at him as you left, but instead made sure to swish your hips a little extra as you climbed the stairs.

Was trying to sleep with your professor something you should actively be trying to do? No definitely not, but you couldn’t ignore the way you wanted him. Maybe if you just got it out of your system once then you’d be able to focus clearly the rest of the semester.

Or you would just be hooked and need more of him.

There was only one way to find out, and you were up for a little challenge.

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