#just take the gay angst

[nezz-cringe-crib]

lawlight angst hc (spoilers)

i started reading the death note manga and there's this one panel talking about light's nightmares and i like to headcanon that those nightmares never go away. even when his memories are gone in the yotsuba arc, he's still having nightmares that he doesn't fully understand but he knows it has something to do with him possibly being kira. he always brushes it to the side though and keeps gaslighting himself into believing it's not true. i especially like to headcanon that the night he gets his memories back, the night before he kills L, he has the worst nightmare he's had since the start of all of this and it completely ruins him. like he just wakes up in a sweat and starts sobbing, to the point where he can't even try to deny himself from anything anymore. i also like to think that on this same night, him and L are sharing the same room together despite not being handcuffed anymore. L probably requests it just because his suspicions are up again, and watching light wake up in a complete panic is the last piece of evidence he needs. but instead of acting on this, he just chooses to ignore it. because despite everything, light is his friend. and he would like to die knowing that the night before his passing, he was beside his friend, not his murderer.

the panel in question btw:

[lulublack90]

Prompt 5 - Wolfsbane Potion

@wolfstarmicrofic April 5, word count 737

It was horrible stuff. Remus was almost positive Snape was ensuring the bitter, cloying flavour of the potion was stronger than it needed to be because it was for him. 

He gagged on the final swallow and had to press his hand to his mouth to stop himself from throwing up. A quiet knock at his door made him jump, and he hurriedly hid the goblet that was still faintly smoking and called out for his visitor to enter. 

Harry’s head poked around the door, his vivid green eyes lighting up when they landed on him. 

“Hi Professor Lupin,” he grinned, and Remus’s heart gave a little twinge. He looked so much like James that Remus could barely keep it together when he looked at the boy. 

“Hello, Harry. What can I do for you?” He returned his best friend's son's smile, even if it was slightly forced. 

“Nothing, just a bit bored, thought I’d pop in and see what you’ve got planned for us next week,” his eyes darted excitedly around the room, looking for the dark creature Remus might have had stashed somewhere. Remus chuckled and crooked his finger as he stood and went over to his cupboard. 

He unlocked it, Harry bouncing from foot to foot in his excitement. Remus had to close his eyes to block out the memory of the boy he knew who also used to do that. He pushed away the shoulder-length black curls, the skin so pale it was almost translucent, those grey eyes that could see into your soul and that lopsided smile that melted his heart every time Sirius used it on him. 

He cleared his throat and slid on his dragon-hide glove before plucking one of the small crab-like creatures from the tank he’d hidden in there. He brought it out into the light to show Harry. “Wow, what is it?” The thirteen-year-old asked excitedly. 

“It is called a Chizpurfle. They are parasites drawn to anything magical. They tend to live in the fur of Krups, the feathers of Augurys, but they also like wizard dwellings. They will gnaw away on wands, guzzle potions from the bottom of cauldrons, anything with a magical signature they’ll hunt it out and devour it. Fascinating things, though it is very easy for an infestation to get out of hand. See the little fangs there?” He pointed at the Chizpurfle’s fangs as it tried in vain to bite through Remus’s glove. “Those are what they use to latch onto a living host and won't let go until they are fit to burst with magic,” Remus let Harry look at it for a while longer before returning it to the tank and after ensuring it was fully secure locked his cupboard back up. 

“It’s kind of like a tick,” Harry mused aloud. 

“Yes, that is a very good comparison. Well done Harry,” he grinned, proud of how Harry had linked the two together. 

“Good enough for a few points to Gryffindor?” Harry asked cheekily. Remus had to school his face so he didn’t roll his eyes. He let out an exasperated sigh. 

“Five points to Gryffindor, because not many can use cheek like that and get away with it,” Harry beamed. “Go on off with you,” Remus ushered him towards the door. “And you’d best be an expert on Chizpurfle’s for your next lesson,” Not that Remus would be teaching it, it fell on the day after the full moon and Remus would be recovering. 

“Yes, Sir,” Harry’s eyes crinkled and glinted with mischief as he quickly exited Remus’s office. Remus shut the door and leaned against it. Sliding down and letting everything he’d been holding back wash over him. 

He turned his head to the pile of newspapers he’d kept on the bottom shelf of his bookcase and pulled out the top one, staring into the face of Sirius Black. 

“I still don’t understand how you drifted so far from the boy I knew to this,” he told the silent picture as Sirius’s face laughed back at him. Remus put the newspaper away and, for the first time in a long time, wished the wolf could take over on the full moon so he could escape for a few hours, but that damn wolfsbane potion wouldn’t let him. He’d be stuck in the wolf’s body with his own mind, fully aware and able to think of lost friends and Sirius.

[evelynpr]

Might be a hot take as a bkdk and tgck truther here, but I find izuocha endlessly fascinating, beautiful, but also tearfully tragic.

I see their love for each other as something representative of their innocence and naivety when they only knew so little about who they were, and what was to come.

I think the main barrier of their relationship is that its rooted in how they see each other very idealistically, specifically that they're attached to the image of their Best Heroic Selves, and not the deeply selfish, destructive, freaky, and egotistical parts of them. To each other, they need to keep fulfilling that image or else that same person they looked up to would almost die in front of them, and that would be too cruel. Although that hero is still there, that same person they looked up to is not the same now because of...well...everything.

Izuku had barely even talked to girls when he first met her. She was Izuku's first ever real friend (Sorry Kats, everyone and him knows he was terrible), so he saved her in that entrance exam even if it was so dangerous. She gave a new meaning to his derogatory nickname just by being a friend that believed in him. After that, she saved him several more times (Blackwhip and Megaphone are the biggest samples iirc). It makes perfect sense that she is Deku's hero.

Ochako hardly knew what it meant to be a hero when she first got into UA. Just by reaching out to some kid tripping, she made a new friend who would then save her in that exam, then save him again in return. This boy then became someone who was always working so hard to save everyone in trouble, and she realized she wanted to be just like him too. "I want to save people"

But...Deku changes. The weight of One for All is on his shoulders and he needs someone to carry this burden with him. He continues to want to save other people at the expense of himself, still not letting his true selfishness and ego ever show- and it only grows more and more unbearable.

Then...Ochako fell in love with Himiko. Truly, relentlessly, selfishly and devotedly in love with a girl who then dies giving her blood to her- the greatest expression of love Himiko could ever give.

Not that they can't love each other because of this happening (and...so many other things oh god), I'm honestly not sure how to explain it- But them ending up together after losing that innocence and naivety? After Ochako will forever grieve the girl who showed her love in its most beautiful and ugly form? After Izuku changed so fundamentally as a person that the butterflies of a nice girl talking to you doesn't exist anymore? After that simple image of being a hero and being in love has completely changed for them both?

Even so, I believe they still love each other. There is no label I know of that can properly describe them though. They are each other's image of being a hero when it comes to saving people. Aside from Shoto, no one else can grasp the grief of the person you tried to save dying in your hands. They would no doubt try to cope with these losses together, and just try to get better together...but so much has changed. They've changed. The world changed. What are they now? Who are they now?

"What happened...to us?"

[romionarry]

hello. the passion on this page………… the palpable pain and heartbreak underneath this fight….. ron starting that sentence about wondering where harry was but cutting himself off before finishing it. harry zeroing in on ron’s bare ankles…. harry HOPING ron will punch him…….. wtf the longing is radiating off the page guys this is my heartstopper

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

the prank is sm sadder canonically,,,

sirius tells snape remus' biggest secret that could get him expelled and shunned, thrown in azkaban if god forbid something happened. and remus... forgives him. he has to. he has to, because between remus and sirius, james would choose sirius a hundred million trillion times over and over again, like a heartbeat, and between james and remus, peter would choose james over remus. it's not like other people particularly cared about him, that he had close friends that weren't the three - he had to stick with them, he didn't have an option. maybe if he left, maybe they'd spread rumors, maybe they would be happier, maybe they'd be indifferent - remus couldn't not forgive sirius, he couldn't hate him outwardly ever because james loved sirius and james held them together.

[chirpsythismorning]

I’m gonna be right there beside milevens cheering if there is leaks about casting for a young male teen, presumed by fans to be Will’s love interest, but for different reasons 😅

[vikvampir3]

Tfw when I realize I’ve known this whole time my dazai and general bsd hyperfixation was self destructive and I kinda don’t care

[ermdotorg]

i got like... halfway into tcoptp and then remus and sirius FINALLY fucking happened and now i've gone weeks without touching the fic because i literally don't think i can take any angst after atyd. i hate it here. save me.

[alaskan-wallflower]

big sucker for forbidden/non reciprocated love so

paul learning he has a crush on darry and has since about freshman year. he kept it to himself but he would but darry stuff in hopes of getting him to stay (i think paul’s parents did similar stuff to what steve’s dad does-like they’d buy him nice and expensive things in hopes that he’d stay their precious baby boy and whatnot, they’re not good parents-) but that was why paul bought darry the madras shirt. he wanted him to stay. to think he had a chance. (more on that later)

come sophomore year and darry gets a girlfriend. i wanna say bev lowkey? but as we know bev is a bitchhhh and in another hc of mine, darry was out with some socs and was arrested because of petty crimes and stuff and had to be bailed out by his mom…this was in like…middle of junior year, so that was when he broke up with bev. he never felt anything for her anyway and just assumed she wasn’t the one. he felt like a real mess. but he never felt anything for anyone really (yes i’m pushing my somewhere on the aroace spectrum darry headcanons at you)

a month or so later and valentine’s day rolls around, paul ends up doing some cheesy “secret admirer” type thing where he bought dart all these expensive ass things and then darry later found paul in the locker room and paul confessed and darry just did not know what to do. he didn’t know paul swung for his team, he also didn’t know that he had a crush on him of all people, but all darry knew is that it was too much. so he just had to awkwardly tell him “i don’t feel the same way, i’m sorry, i love you too, but only as a friend” and that absolutely crushed paul.

OR ALTERNATIVELY

darry is like “okay, fine, i’ll give it a shot, i never felt anything for girls so maybe i’m gay” but whenever paul insinuates going…y’know. darry just feels…not right? he tries for paul. paul’s his best friend. he wants paul happy. but darry isn’t happy. and i don’t really think that if darry and paul were in a relationship that they’d be healthy. especially since it’s a soc/greaser relationship AND they’re both guys.

i feel like paul would get kind of annoyed that darry didn’t exactly feel the same way—like even kissing became awkward because darry never felt right and i feel like this led to a lot of fights between the two until darry absolutely breaks down and is just like “i can’t! i can’t fucking do this anymore! i’m trying my best and i can’t feel anything!” and paul takes that kind of personally, to the point where that’s when they break up and their friendship is over

it took a lot of time for darry to heal, it really did. but eventually he did realize it wasn’t his fault and was somewhat grateful to be “too busy for a relationship”, which is what he tells people when they ask if he’s found someone yet, because he knows that no matter who it is, he’s not gonna feel anything much, if at all, other than platonic love.

i’m an aroace darry truther. sue me

[me10n-10rde]

Barty didn’t know Pandora died

Barty who was stuck in the body of the man who killed the love of his life, who had to pretend to be best friends with the man who did nothing to save his best friend, the only bright spot was getting to see Pandora again. Okay do it wasn’t actually Pandora, but Luna looked just like her. He hadn’t ever gotten to meet Luna, at that point Pandora wasn’t talking to him, but he had heard about her birth and knew just how happy Pandora must be.

She would have never seen him as himself, but maybe she would see moody. It wouldn’t be the same of course, he couldn’t hug her, wouldn’t get to see her smile the way she used to, but he could see her.

Until Pandora Luna decided to mention her, more specifically her death. They were discussing safety when creating defensive spells, probably too advanced for 3rd years, but he and his friends started making spells around them, so they should know safe techniques (he had really missed his eyebrows when he singed them off); when Luna mentioned offhandedly that her mother had died when creating a spell

He was crushed

Dead inside

As if the dementors had given him a fat fucking kiss

The last good bright spot left in his life, gone

Except Alastor Moody didn’t know Pandora Rosier, and so he couldn’t mourn her

His heart was stomped on and broken and he just had to keep teaching this fucking lesson

Goodbye Pandora, you wouldn’t have wanted to hear it from Barty, but he needed to say it

[bottombaron]

i kno he had a lot going on at the moment and he wasnt there for the Patton Oswalt-Batman event but i just know, deep down in my heart of hearts, 42 hours after he's been returned as a human, Guillermo De La Cruz is going to be spending a lot of time in that potting shed thinking abt Nandor's scary aggressive dom phase

[jadzio-writing-prowess]

its been 3 weeks hasnt it? sorry ive been having... a time. im just not fully mentally with myself but i think im ready to get back to writing again. maybe... ive got 2 asks imma get to em... eventually. maybe will write something easier to kick myself back into gear

[moonyaugust]

just had a terrible realization that post-seventh year mary and hestia is kinda sorta definitely “night shift” by lucy dacus… catch me crying in the club

mary is literally trying to take the night shift so she doesn’t see hestia… and hestia just wants to absolve her guilt and shake hands… this is hell why did I ever start thinking about these sad gay girls

[garymerlow]

do you think the guys would’ve gotten gay married in the 90s (if it had been possible back then) just for shits and giggles? bc I have my theories about who would’ve suggested it, who would’ve said no, who would’ve said yes, who would’ve said yes but ONLY for tax purposes, etc

haha this is certainly a question! (I love it btw)

I mean realistically though I don't think they would've, or if they did (even for shits & giggles) I think some behind the scenes management driven divorce would've occurred in retaliation...

but in my fannish dreams, well, I could certainly see the possibility being there, for some of them!

also now I'm just giggling over the mental image of Gary only going along with it for tax purposes, cause I think he'd be the one who'd only wanna do it for the most practical reasons, back then, much to the other guys' chagrin.

Would love to hear your theories, though! 🤔

[danganronpa96]

idk if this is the right place to ask but what was the planned story of despair gang? (if you're okay with answering!)

At this point I have to be honest with myself and realise that no, I’m probably never going to go back to that fic considering all the plans I have for myself for the future (lol)

In that case, I’m finally going share what was going to happen in the rest of the plot (fun fact chapter 6 had already been half written before I stopped working on it rip)

So, for anyone curious, I’m going to leave a link to the unfinished chapter 6 (with some extra notes and art) and the rest of the plot under the cut

So, I kind of split the story into 5 acts and an epilogue, and chapter 6 was the start of act 2. Bear in mind I only wrote down a vague plan of the story as the majority of it was in my head at the time.

Chapter 6: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1p8uFhqoSiFgyAz5PYmYn1O7EHHVPkZXF3xMi_d4b7to/edit?usp=sharing

When it cuts back to the gang, before making it to the apartments, they come across a basketball court full of Monokumas in their way. They deal with them together as a team.

They then have a round of basketball together (Rin and Papyrus vs. Hajime and Matt) — Hajime manages to score the final dunk only because of the help of Izuru, who he quickly attempts to repress as the others cheer for him.

Afterwards, they find the apartments and settle into one that’s the least destroyed and messy.

Rest of Act 2:

At one point, the gang find a playground where Rin and Matt go on the swings. They talk about what they should do after the tragedy, mentioning theme parks, which sparks Hajime to chime in. Rin and Matt then go to the bathroom, leaving Hajime and Papyrus alone. Papyrus tries to talk to Hajime about what happened at the basketball court.

Another day, Hajime and Papyrus go out to find entertainment for Rin and Matt after the two complain about having nothing to do. Hajime gets his leg slashed by a Monokuma during an ambush, so Papyrus carries him to a bookstore where he can safety bandage him. He then gives Hajime a pep talk about his confidence. Hajime wants to say something back, but Monokumas once again catch them off guard, forcing them to flee back to the apartment.

Another day, Papyrus and Rin go out on a supply run while Hajime heals from his injury. During this time, Hajime gets to know Matt better, where he talks about his time working for Despair Melody (and puppy crush on Parappa).

There was going to be a scene where Hajime and Papyrus end up in an arena similar to the UDG game but instead of fighting a child, Gumi invites them into the middle of the arena for a challenge, demanding she gets Rin if she wins. However, Hajime and Papyrus manage to win, so Gumi cuts off her finger much to their horror.

The end of Act 2 would have the gang’s apartment being found and burned, forcing them to flee into the sewers.

Act 3:

After navigating the sewers for a while, they come onto land again where they realise they’ve ended up in a district all about Miku: billboards, flyers, merch stores, and music all around. They would go onto infiltrate Despair Melody’s base (which is the Parappa Town school). I think this was because they were going to use it to gain good reception to contact Future Foundation (and talk to Nagito and Parappa).

Act 4:

In an act of defiance and manic, Gumi kills Sunny. The gang wait atop the rooftop (of the school I’m assuming, perhaps to be picked up by Future Foundation) but are ambushed by Gumi, who they see has replaced her chopped off finger with Miku’s somehow. They would then flee through riots in the streets (probably Despair Melody’s doing) where they loose Matt during the escape. However, Izuru finally manifests, allowing Papyrus and Rin to be captured while he flees.

(I don’t remember what act this was going to be, but at one point while sitting alone, Hajime would finally gain the courage to tell Papyrus about Sans, but to his surprise, Papyrus figures it out himself. The two then have a hurt/comfort moment about it.)

Act 5:

Hajime is awoken/saved by AI Teto (was gonna be a whole other plot thing lol). Hajime then locates and saves Papyrus. As the two go to find Rin, AI Teto would take over a Monokuma and ensue some hijinks. Gumi would tell Rin the truth about Len: that he’s dead. He was the body that Miku used in the 3rd case of the 69th killing game that they dressed up as Miku (yes this is actually canon when Teto says “I didn’t want Miku to kidnap—” but cuts herself off in the 6th trial, she was going to spill that they kidnapped Len for that case). They save Rin and confront Gumi. Izuru manifests again, but this time to finish off Gumi himself by slashing her stomach.

I don’t know how this happens but in the plan it then says ‘the building explodes as the three are rescued by a Future Foundation helicopter’.

(I also assume this is the act where Hajime is finally true with his feelings towards Papyrus and is 100% reciprocated c’mon c’mon reverse sansmaeda real and true)

Epilogue:

The gang (I srsly don’t know what happened to Matt at this point maybe he was already on the helicopter that would be cool) join Future Foundation as the world starts to be rebuilt together. Gumi, who didn’t die, is put into the hope rehabilitation program.

Bonus: Hajime and Papyrus adopt Rin and Matt and now live as a family because a human and a skeleton can fall in love and raise a singing robot girl and a dog boy. The end :)

Also for anyone wondering, the participants of Sunny’s killing game were all planned to just die in the explosion, but hey wouldn’t it be funny if they were all found and rescued at the end instead 👍

[feminetomboy]

"Oh no the people Cellbit chose for his ttrpg are too silly and unserious, they're going to ruin the gritty setting of Ordem Paranormal :((" must have been said by someone who's never watched a single OP session in their life. Or does not understand nuance.