#just a little encouragement to anyone having trouble in a similar situation

[chaesyoung]

manifested a 3p away in just over a month! in the past, i've had a lot of trouble manifesting 3ps away - it'd happen eventually, but it would take several months where i'd go back and forth wavering and wondering if it'd ever happen. this time, that still happened quite a bit, but i tried my best to stay in the state of the wish fulfilled while also working on myself and my confidence. i know, we hear it all the time, but self-concept is so important! during this time, i've been looking at some of my main beliefs about myself and working on deconstructing them to become healthier.

after this 3p popped up, as a combination of that and some other factors, i was genuinely in the worst mental state i've ever been in. i'd go part of the day knowing it'd be okay somehow, then part of it stressing over the 3p, then part of it wondering if things with my sp would really be meant to be, then i'd go to sleep imagining everything was okay with my sp while wondering if i was just lying to myself. rinse and repeat over and over. "realistically," with how much i was wavering, it probably shouldn't have manifested. that's where i think self-concept work really helped me, since i was working on giving the love i want to myself the best i can while also finding other things to pursue and enjoy. for example, if i didn't feel like washing my face before bed, i'd tell myself "i'm worth the effort" and do it anyway. i still wanted to be with my sp and have the 3p go away somehow, but i was also finding ways to enjoy myself and romanticize my life on my own.

another thing that helped me during this time was handing things over to the universe, which is really hard for me because of a) my insecurity-based tendency to want to have control over things, and b) the idea i've seen in a lot of loass spaces that we have complete control over our reality. if that idea works for you, that's awesome and i have nothing against that! in my situation, though, i found it made me beat myself up if something went "wrong" and i'd be stressing over little details. instead, i'd try to take a deep breath and say "the universe is handling it, all i need to do is know it'll happen eventually." i tried to trust more in divine timing and the idea that i'm being guided to my dream future no matter what the actual path might look like.

much longer post than i originally planned to make, but i hope this might be comforting to anyone who's overthinking their desire or doubting themselves for wavering/not having it instantly! you're not less of a manifestor or less powerful if your desires take some time to show up, and it doesn't mean they'll never show up. we all have our own paths and you're going to reach the things you want. just keep your head up and keep pushing even when it's tricky <3

[yanderes-galore]

Hiii! Can I request a Yandere Concept for Maki Harukawa from Danganronpa please?

Sure! I never really finished V3 but I did do my research as usual! Can't believe so many people hate her....

Yandere! Maki Harukawa Concept

Pairing: Platonic/Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking, Violence, Attempted murder, Blood, Manipulation, Overprotective behavior, Isolation, Implied dubious turned forced companionship/relationship.

Maki is someone that's very hard to approach, especially in this setting.

It's normal to be distrustful of people in a Killing Game.

It's easy to think someone somewhere is plotting something, it's just a matter of time before someone strikes.

Maki is already quite isolated and deceptive, which can make many people wary.

First of all, she hides her true talent from people.

She Isolates herself and can come off cold towards others.

She isn't a people person.

Even towards her obsession at the start... She doesn't really want to be around anyone.

As the Killing Game goes on, she only really trusts Kaito and Shuichi.

She may trust her obsession similar to how she trusts those two.

Although... It's shown that Maki isn't good with relationships of any kind or social situations.

At a young age she was forced to kill.

Which doesn't do well for a child when it comes to social life.

She struggles with friendships, let alone relationships.

Around her obsession she'd struggle to understand her feelings.

She likes your presence of all people but isn't sure how to approach.

Maki doesn't like the thought of hurting you in any way.

Be that emotionally or physically, she doesn't want you hurt in this game by her or anyone else.

I feel at first Maki would want you to keep your distance due to this.

She knows you'd be better off if you didn't befriend her.

Others may suspect you of something and you could get into unnecessary trouble.

She hates unnecessary trouble.

Although... You still manage to be both persistent yet respectful.

Your interactions are often a bit cold, yet Maki tries not to cause too much damage with her words.

Please... She doesn't need you crying because she said something a little bit rude.

Don't misunderstand her rude behavior, she wouldn't take joy in bullying you.

She's just trying to wall herself off from you.

She likes being alone and your conversations are brief.

But she can't help but listen in on conversations where you're mentioned.

Just because she knows she shouldn't be close to you doesn't mean she won't listen in on you.

Maki most likely cares for you in her own way, she just isn't sure how to properly show that.

Speaking with Maki, if you can even call your early conversations that, is difficult at times.

She's another who's hard to read and she likes it that way.

It saves her from having to explain her internal turmoil about you with you.

Maki would eventually become friends with you, but not without scouting you out first.

She quietly watches you from a distance, noting how you interact with others.

She's cautious, knowing you could be a potential target.

She learns about you through these... "observations".

She's no doubt skilled at it due to being the Ultimate Assassin, even if no one knows that.

Even when she gives in and becomes your ally, no doubt due to Kaito encouraging her when he notices her concern for you, Maki is still wary of others around you.

She's not the most trustful or trusting person, which makes her suspect your fellow classmates of planning something.

Maki's intentions can be left dubious for this due to how she is with relationships.

She'd want her obsession safe, and out of anyone here, she may be the best suited for that due to her Ultimate.

She doesn't plan on murdering anyone, yet she'd quickly be the one to prevent it if you were the target.

So in terms of her yandere type, she's mostly lucid and would be defensive.

She rarely takes her eyes off her obsession, often looking for anything suspicious.

For the longest time she thought she wasn't worthy of relationships.

She's a murderer, yet has people standing beside her.

She knows you probably deserve better... especially when you're trapped in a Killing Game.

Maki may use her true talent to her advantage, never making the first move yet stepping in to pull you from unwanted situations.

Anything from awkward conversations to threats... Maki steps in and offers to drag you out of it.

Most people may not target you due to seeing how Maki watches you like a hawk.

She even feels anxious when she sees a bit of blood on you, even if it was due to an accident.

Maki may even sacrifice sleep at times to make sure no one picks you off.

No one matters more to her than you.

She doesn't care where your dorm is, she's going to find a way to monitor you somehow.

If anyone attacked you or plotted to harm you, Maki's there in an instant.

Even more so if her Ultimate has been revealed.

She's quick to pull the knife out, standing in front of you with a feral glare in her eyes.

The blood on her clothes would always be out of defense.

Jealousy doesn't typically occur in her, if it does, she hides it.

Maki may subconsciously isolate you.

It's instinctual to her due to the situation.

You could easily fall victim here if she's not with you.

Be you friends, or something else, Maki would rather be executed due to protecting you than watching you die.

She can't believe she cares for someone this much.

But anything is better to her than watching the person she cares the most about covered in blood.

She's violent towards others at times due to her paranoia.

She cares about you... so she often holds a softer gaze and tone with you.

She feels that she's the only one capable of caring and protecting you.

Maki isn't necessarily possessive, even if she may come off like that when she threatens other classmates.

She's more... protective.

She watches over her obsession like a protective guardian, fitting of a caregiver regardless of how she feels.

It may go against the rules, but she may keep you in her dorm at times.

You may want to leave... and you can... but she's with you the entire time.

She isn't the most affectionate person.

She shows she cares via her protection and soft praises.

It isn't a lot... but to her it means so much more than words can describe.

Maki would do anything to make sure she doesn't lose someone she cares about again...

Even if it means she doesn't live to see it.

[fluffyzoey]

"Family Dinner"

Zoey agrees to take Estelle to meet her parents for supper. Trouble ensues, and Zoey realizes a few things too <3

Reblogs n feedback. encouraged.

“This is it.”

Estelle had walked by it hundreds of times, probably. It was an old, gray house with white trim, a perfect green lawn dotted with flowers, quite a feat considering how late into November it was. Its windows seemed to watch her, big and clean with heavy curtains hanging from the rods above them. It was a normal house, but part of it seemed almost unfriendly to people like Estelle.

“So…this is where you grew up, huh?” She clutched Zoey’s hand as they approached the home. Zoey seemed nervous. She let go of Estelle’s hand about halfway through the yard.

“Yes. Estelle, listen to me. As far as my folks are concerned, you’re just a friend from theatre who didn’t have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving, understood? No funny business, no hand holding, and if you refer to me as babe, it’s on sight.” Zoey patted her partner’s back gently, turning her body around to face her. “You got all that? If all goes well we can be in and out in a few hours.”

Estelle nodded, just for proof she understood the assignment. “Got it. But, hypothetically, if we snuck off to the bathroom…?”

Zoey rolled her eyes and risked a kiss, just a quick little peck on the lips. “Shut the fuck up. You’re trying to out me at this point.”

The foyer was decorated exactly the way Estelle had expected it to be. The walls were a sort of sandy beige, each one lined with framed photos of what appeared to be a young Zoey and Zach. Estelle was a little bit unsettled by the unfamiliarity of it all, but was overjoyed to have access to her girlfriend’s childhood photos: there was Zoey in some play as an elementary schooler, there she was as a toddler in a tiny princess costume, and there she was as prom queen, which Estelle remembered very well.

The sign above the door into the kitchen read “Bless This Nest”, and blessed it seemed to be. Estelle, having not been raised religious, wondered if it was some sort of requirement to have a crucified Jesus statue in every room. She shoved this thought out of her head as a pair of hazel eyes met hers.

“Zach!” She beamed. Zoey’s brother, while not getting along with his sister a good chunk of the time (which, frankly, was quite fair, considering Zoey was a bitch to pretty much everyone), had always been nice to Estelle. Today, though, he looked nervous, somber. Estelle reminded herself that Zach was in a similar situation to herself. Zoey had nearly outed him numerous times; if anyone found out, both twins were screwed.

“Hey, Estelle.” He shot her a knowing glance. “Zo, uh, mom and dad are in the dining room. They’re excited to meet your friend.” 

Zoey looked so much like her mother. That was the thought at the forefront of Estelle’s mind as she followed the twins into the dining room. She was greeted by the smiling face of a brunette woman in a pullover cardigan and a pair of yoga pants.

“Zoey!” She chirped. She wrapped her daughter in an embrace. “You’re late! I was so scared you’d been taken from me on your way here, and-” Finally, the attention landed on Estelle.

“You must be that friend of hers!” Mrs. Chambers laughed heartily. “Oh, Zoey was telling me all about you! My name is Michelle, this is my husband, Carl…” She gestured behind her. 

Carl Chambers was a tall, yet rather rotund man. He didn’t share many similarities with his children, save for the eyes, which were unmistakably Zoey’s: greenish-brown, yet just as cold as ice blue ones would be (until you got used to them, at least). He gave a grumble in Estelle’s general direction then went back to watching Joe Rogan videos on the phone held awkwardly out in front of him. 

“And you’ve met my son, Zachary.” Mrs. Chambers added. “I was blessed with two lovely children, that’s right! I’m always telling Zoey, having kids early was the best decision I ever made!”

Zoey looked about ready to A) bolt up the stairs, and B) throw herself out a window. 

“Ah, but she’s all wrapped up in her silly little theater and…auditions and…rehearsals…all of those things.” She clicked her tongue impatiently. “Grandkids can wait, I guess.” Suddenly, an idea seemed to come upon her.

“Speaking of grandkids, ah, your Mima should be here any moment! Her…her nurse is driving her in, you know, the live-in one she hired…shame she wouldn’t let us move her into the retirement home, but to each their own! Turkey’s in the oven, stuffing’s on the stove, and, Zoey, dear, fix your shirt, you look like a…like a…like an improper lady.”

From across the room, Zach mouthed “whore”. Zoey waited for their mother to turn her back and then stuck up her middle finger. Maybe this wouldn’t be too terrible?

After a minor fuss over Zoey’s…slut shirt…Mrs Chambers locked eyes with Estelle. “And what about you, dear? No boyfriend to stay with? No husband?”

Estelle resisted the urge to roll her eyes and instead stayed calm enough to respond with: “No…I’m not looking for anything at the moment.”

Nice save. 

Mrs. Chambers gave a little tsk tsk noise. “Well, when you do, my Zach is always single, he’s-”

“Mom, we’ve been through this.” Zach groaned. 

“Poor dear’s never had a date in his life!”

“Fuckin’ pussy…” Mr. Chambers added helpfully from his armchair. “Coulda done what I did and just taken, a real man wouldn’t-”

Estelle looked over at Zoey, a surefire way to drown out any unwanted noise. Her girlfriend cast her a gentle smile, and Estelle felt like she was going to melt. No matter who was around, somehow Zoey still had eyes for her. It inflated her ego quite a bit, actually. 

“Well, why don’t you kids take your seats?” Mrs. Chambers suggested. “Estelle, dear, I’m sure you’ve had a dinner like this before, of course?”

“She’s not a hobo, mom.” Zoey plopped down on a chair and gestured for Estelle to sit beside her. 

“I’m only asking if she knows how we say grace, and pray before we eat, my wonderful daughter. Come help me dish everything up before your Mima arrives.”

And thus began 20 minutes of awkwardly following Zoey and her mother around. Estelle trailed behind, actively afraid of getting too close. She was well aware that she was a clingy bastard, but if she let that side show, it may have equaled…well, nothing positive.

“Now, tell me a bit about yourself, dear.” Mrs. Chambers handed Estelle a dish of some sort of foul-smelling casserole. “I haven’t seen you around, you must be quite the homebody!”

“Yeah, uh, I guess so. I own a thrift shop.” She wished with all her might that someone would come relieve her of her casserole-holding burden. No one came.

“Really!” Zoey’s mum looked pleased. “That’s…very interesting! Now that you mention that, I think Zoey may have said that when she told us you were coming for dinner. Now, dear, you two met at…theatre?”

“Yeah!” That was a total lie. Estelle’s face went red as she scrambled to think of a way to make it more believable. “I do tech stuff. Makeup and costumes.”

“Oh…You don’t know the Woodwards’ girl, do you?” Mrs Chambers’ voice became soft. “Zoey mentioned she ran makeup.”

“I’m right here, mom.” Zoey emerged from beside the kitchen island. “And yeah, of course she knows Alice. She’s doing a damn great job.”

“I know, I know, but…oh, Zoey, you know what I tell you about the, ah, choices…that Alice has made…I don’t want that for you. It’s disobeying God’s word!” She pursed her lips, pausing for a moment before gently touching her daughter’s shoulder. “I’m just glad you’re not one of them. You know…L…L…”

“Lesbian?” Estelle put in, only trying to be helpful. Zoey made a slicing motion over her neck. 

Shit. 

“Is that what she’s calling herself? When I was young they just said gay, none of this fancy…fancy stuff. You know, the other day, I met someone who called herself pansexual! People are attracted to frying pans, Zoey!”

They ambled back to the dining room, placing dishes upon dishes onto the flat mahogany tabletop. Mr Chambers and Zach were standing at opposite sides of the room, eying each other; Zach with anxiety, and his father with disdain. 

“I was just telling our guest about Bill Woodward’s poor daughter.” Mrs Chambers sat down solemnly. “What a shame she ended up the way she did.”

“A miracle the Woodwards’re even botherin’ to show their mugs at church.” Her husband replied gruffly. Estelle wanted nothing more, in that moment, than to throw herself at Zoey and kiss her right on the lips in front of the whole Chambers clan, but nevertheless, she remained in her seat.

Within minutes, the door opened again, and in walked a withered, almost emaciated old woman. She was dressed in a long yellow dress and a bonnet, looking straight out of church on Easter Sunday. Estelle wondered if she’d maybe gotten the holiday wrong. Behind her, a young man with a dark complexion and very short, buzz-cut hair and a faceful of carefully groomed stubble, carried what appeared to be her purse. Zach’s face went bright red when he saw him.

“Ah! Miranda!” Mrs. Chambers flew to her feet, taking the bag from the young man. “And Josh, so good to see you. This is Zoey’s new little friend, Estelle. Estelle, well…I’ll let Zoey do the introducing, hm?”

Zoey jerked a finger toward the old woman. “This is my grandmother, we call her Mima. That’s Josh, her assistant and Zach’s roommate.”

“Nice to meet you both.” Estelle smiled at the young man, and he returned it. When she looked at Mima, she merely got a disgusted grimace.

As the family took their seats, hands came together and eyes began to shut. Estelle had been raised pretty much agnostic, and was more confused than anything, but she politely followed the instruction Zach gave from her left side. Zoey looked bored out of her mind, but everyone else seemed rather peaceful. It was quite nice, if not for the immediate threat of her girlfriend being disowned.

“We thank the Lord for this meal.” Mima’s weak old voice seemed to scratch the air when she talked. “And for our family.”

“And that none o’ my children are fuckin- homos!” Mr Chambers interrupted. “And for, uh, Heaven above, o’course.”

“Amen.”

After the initial meal was over (and it was surprisingly good, especially to Estelle, a notoriously horrible cook), the younger members of the family managed to excuse themselves from the table and go back into the kitchen for drinks and snacks. Almost as soon as Mima, Mr and Mrs Chambers were out of sight, Zoey’s arm snaked around her girlfriend’s waist.

“Thanks for putting up with them.” She tilted Estelle’s head up toward her own, eyes narrowing the same way they did in the bedroom. “You look so fucking hot like this by the way. You should dress up more often, babe.” She let her hands dance over Estelle’s body, feeling every fiber of her dress shirt and long skirt. “So hot.”

Meanwhile, Zach had reunited with his boyfriend, and that’s definitely what Josh was to him, Estelle knew it immediately, and the two were concocting some sort of suicide juice, like what you made when you mixed all the soft drinks together at a fountain. 

Well, this one was alcoholic and far more likely to kill you, anyway.

“Only way to deal with the old hag is to get a little tipsy.” Josh leaned against the counter and downed a shot of the stuff, handing a glass to Zach as well. 

“I’m in.” Zoey shrugged. She glanced over at Estelle. “I assume you’re not, miss shirley-temple-at-the-bar?” 

Estelle puffed out her chest. “I drink on Holidays only, don’t want a repeat of my 21st.” She examined the selection of liquor before pouring a glass of brandy.

“Of course it’s brandy.” Zoey remarked slyly. “You’re an old soul, aren’t you?”

Estelle took a sip. Then another, then another. It was probably a bad sign that she was tipsy without even half of the glass down the hatch, but she took another swig. In her mind if she passed out drunk she could go home earlier.

“Jesus fucking Christ baby,” Zoey put a hand on her shoulder. “Any more of that and you’ll be throwing up in my car on the ride home. So, uh, don’t fucking drink more.”

Zoey recognized that this was a bad idea, but part of her (perhaps the part that hadn’t had sex in two whole weeks) really liked the idea of Drunk Estelle. That version of her lover tended to be clingy, affectionate, and above all, really fucking hot. Was this the time or place, though? No. 

Before long, her parents and grandmother had emerged from the dining room. “I see you’re all hitting it off in here! Oh, goodness, are you drinking? Zoey! A proper woman doesn’t-“

“Relax, mom, it’s ginger ale.” Zoey lied. This satisfied her mother on that front, before her eyes reached the redhead. 

“What’s she having?” Her mother replied hastily. “After living with your father for so long I can tell when someone’s drunk.”

“Let her have fun, mom. It’s Thanksgiving. Give. Thanks.” Zach’s normal, not-pretending-to-be-straight-for-parents voice was shining through now. 

“Hey, so, it’s…probably a good idea for us to get going.” Zoey turned to Estelle, filled with a new sense of urgency and not just because she wanted to get home and make out. Estelle put on her pouty face.

“Noooo~” She whined. “Wanted…pie.”

“She knows what’s good for her!” Mr Chambers hollered. “Get the girl some pie, Michelle! It’s about damn time we had dessert!”

Estelle clapped gleefully like a child on Christmas morning. “Babe! Pie!”

Zoey felt her heart leap into her chest. “I told you not to call me that! Friends, uh, don’t call friends that!”

It was like Estelle had forgotten everything they’d talked about. Her eyes were watering. “Are…are you breakin’ up with me?” 

There was really only one way to save this. Mima and her parents were staring at her, appalled. “We were never dating! Liquor’s getting to your head, uh, Estelle-”

Zoey glanced back at her mother, who looked about ready to faint. “Dear…is she one of those…is she a…”

“No! No, mom!” Zoey backed away from Estelle, who was reaching for her. “Don’t worry, she’s, uh, pure and…of God or whatever. I’m gonna drive her home now, okay? Yeah, come on Estelle, we’re-”

“Out.” Her father said sternly. “I want her outta my house, Zoey! Go!”

Zoey grabbed Estelle by the wrist. “I’ll…I’ll call you later, mom! Happy Thanksgiving!”

There was no response.

“Did I ruin it all?” Estelle whispered. She was laying on her side, across from Zoey in bed. Zoey had been pretty quiet all night, almost nervous. Now, as she curled up in an old t-shirt and sweatpants, she shook her head no with a smile.

“Just go to sleep, baby. You’re gonna have one hell of a hangover tomorrow.” She pulled Estelle into her chest, letting her press her face against the tender flesh. Estelle’s legs wrapped around her hips, arms around her shoulders. Zoey sighed wistfully. Six months ago, she never would have even considered dating a girl. She actually wouldn’t have really wanted to date anyway: no date she’d ever been on felt fulfilling. Now, here she was, pressed so tightly against Estelle it was hard to tell where one girl ended and another began.

And to be honest? Zoey liked that. For once in her life, she liked someone else a hell of a lot.

[roxannedaybreakermidnight]

Tackling a few of my most recent experiences wiwth the internet. Don't read if harassment and racism trigger you. I don't mean harm, this is supposed to be a safe space. Comments I deem negative will be deleted so that others feel comfortable just going around and say whatever.

1. Shipping

I completely understand people's worries with Punkflower but guys, instead of worrying about non confirmed ages, can we worry about kicking out actually problematic people off the internet doing stuff to real life minors? Miles was 14 when I was 14. He is now 15 and I am 18, I still love Miles the same way, ans that doesn't compromise my morals.

A person's ship between characters doesn't say about their morals entirely. Of course, sometimes it's undeniably creepy, like characters clearly presented as parental figures being shipped with kids that were supposed to look up at them. That's weird, don't do that. Or, idk, thinking it's a good idea to jerk your dog off. (I saw documentaries, those who do too knkw what I am talking about)

Point is, pls don't harass people who don't mean actual harm. Hobie's uncomfirmed age range shouldn't cause as much hate as it does. I disagree with nsfw from time to time because it is weird, but I mostly see couple-y stuff with a few jokes, and honestly? I absolutely adore it. I encourage you to try it. I used to absolutely hatee on people who ship any characters slightly older with whatever character the topic is. I would literally try to gate keep the whole fanart community cause "She's a minor, STOP!" and honestly it was stupid asf. I'm not telling you to encourage it, just don't be mean about it. It feels stupid. If you don't disagree, and the post isn't causing harm, just don't engage.

2. Shameless racism/harassment

Recently I've faced people both in and out of omegle who seem particularly shameless, feeling safe around their little homes thinking ol' mean me won't mind. I am using this opportunity to expose a particular someone who seems very keen on being weird. I grew up around weird guys, and I often identify them easily, but for some reason I pushed the lil gut feeling away. If you have the same problem, pls listen to that feeling. It's there to avoid situations that might be upsetting.

Starting with Omegle, people seem very comfortable with racism (and search of minors to flash them). I receive jokes indicating they want me to be shot, find me ugly, make faces of disgust, call me a slave, etc etc. Not to mention I even found teenagers joking about beastiality being 'awesome'. Kids rlly need to get supervised, cause I am telling y'all, some were barely 14.

Now, I had an interesting interaction on instagram with a Miles Morales account. He came to me cause I was rping as Peter and invited me in his server on discord. I got the gut feeling from his habit of trying to flirt with Gwen profiles and spamming pictures of him in a suit. For some reason, some people have a pattern of spamming pictures when they want praise and always require attention from specific people, and I know this cause I've been harassed over this before. Days later, I was matching with my bff as an anime couple so I changed and he realized I'm born female. He asked me to be rio instead, without knowing my age, and went ahead and offered 'fun', and that 'I can't tell anyone'. What happened essentially is that I called him out, he said I was disrespecting him, I blocked him, so he made a new account to cuss me out and threaten to report me. I feel indifferent about it, but if you have anyone with similar behavior, save yourself the trouble and block them. (His discord is 'dmoney520' so avoid interacting w him pls)

3. Sexualizing a content creator

I don't mean Dream, or corpse husband, or whoever tf. I am talking about a poor 16(ish) year old called Eddie who makes content for the fact he sounds like Hobie brown, and he has people saying shit like "wanna get pregnant?" The guy just started worrying about whatever the place he lives in worries around this time.

It's honestly creepy how people will actively harass punkflower creators but then barely notice a full ass guy who is still deemed a minor regardless of what American law says getting weirdass comments from people they don't even know. Literally flabbergasted at this discovery. Not mad, just genuinely upset.

These people often forget that websites can track their activity and its hilarious to me, so whatever. This was my report on my feelings after a week of internet, and honestly? I wanna delete it. My punkflower AU happy ending is coming so if that's what you wanted, great!

[land-of-sinners]

Maybe D, E, & L for Broken Record pretty please? 🙏

You can absolutely have some Broken Record!

D - Danger how do they react to finding out the other person is in trouble?

Both Serenity and Alastor would be very quick to jump to action if they knew the other was in danger. They are aware of each other’s skills and could probably take care of themselves as individuals, but that won't stop them from at last trying to protect one another. Serenity's main concern would be getting rid of the threat and making sure her man is okay, while Alastor would primarily be concerned with leaving an intimidating impression on the attacker(s) to make sure Serenity wouldn't be in a similar situation in the future.

E - Encourage how do they encourage each other?

Alastor encourages Serenity through grand, loud displays. Boasting her accomplishments and letting her know on no uncertain terms that she's a woman deserving of being heard. Serenity is a lot softer with her encouragement (if Alastor ever really needed it, being the egoist he is). Gentle reminders that, no matter what, she will stand by his side. Protecting and loving him honestly and openly.

L - Love when did they realize they were in love?

It did take a while for Serenity and Alastor to really accept they were in love with each other, being the kind of people they are (asexuals with a history of bad relationships and trust issues). I mean, when Serenity was ready to just simply confess she may have feelings for Alastor, she was fully prepared for rejection, not expecting anything to come of it. And at first, Alastor really just viewed the 'relationship' as some new form of entertainment he was open to explore; a new experience to satisfy his curiosity. But the more they got to know each other, they sympathized with each other’s pasts and gave one another the safe space they both desperately needed. Serenity first realized she was truly in love when she saw just how much Alastor was willing to do for her, for both her safety and happiness. It took much longer, but Alastor realized he was in love when he saw how genuine Serenity truly was. This little sinner was willing to do anything for him without the condition of a soul contract, and it was the first time he felt anyone genuinely and unconditionally cared for him in years.

[seeingteacupsindragons]

First of all i hope you'll get better soon! i've been in the same situation before, i know what it's like.

Second of all i didn't mean to look like i was complaining. I just got excited someone said what i've been meaning to say for a while now, so i reblogged it. I had no idea having a slightly different opinion/criticizing the fandom would be so controversial here- as i said i've been talking about similar topics on other platforms and i got mostly positive feedback.. I didn't expect anyone to respond, yet here i am. Someone else responded acting like i sacrificed their firstborn, but at least i got a good laugh out of it lmao

Anyways, i'm sorry if this caused you trouble, it wasn't my intention at all! (and sorry if this doesn't make sense, i got up at 5am and i'm still drowsy- and also sorry for sending you this ask, i just wanted to clarify things and put an end to it. No pressure, you don't have to respond if you don't want to)

You don't have to apologize for the ask. I like asks. I was grumpy this morning, and as you can probably tell, not as good at playing peacemaker as I'd like.

I have just been a fairly popular blog in this fandom for running on four years now, and so I really don't want to encourage fandom arguments here because things get blown out of proportion because of how much of the fandom will see it hanging out here and give what I say a little too much Oomph.

I shut down reblogs on that post and am deleting replies now because I'm trying to stop that disaster of people arguing fed into my notifications. People can go argue somewhere I don't have it force fed to me.

I have had so, so much fandom wank in my inbox over the years, on God. This is my blog, not a fandom bulletin board.

Anyway, feel free to ask about Moran or someone anytime here in my inbox. I love to talk about lots of things besides Sherliam even though I do have lots to say about Sherliam, too, and will for a long time yet.

I do have a whole Moran section in my character meta master list!

Anyway, get some rest and let's all just. Move on.

[tinybitsubby]

You have described yourself as "NOT a masochist" but enjoying rough (often very rough) sex. You have described your Husband as not only a Dom but a sadist as well. This is very similar to my relationship.

How does one balance the desire to [consensually] inflict pain on someone who is not completely wired to receive it? Conversely, how far will/do you let him go before limits kick in? Is that limit based on your desire to please or your personal, physical limit?

I have been with masochists before and the flow was very natural and easy. But with someone who is also self described as "not a masochist" AND me being a sadist who would not want to hurt anyone outside of a BDSM consensual agreement, I sometime find myself treading especially carefully.

Any thoughts are appreciated.

Hi Anon. I’m glad you wish to tread carefully! I want to give a thoughtful answer. Before I get to your question, I feel I should define my husband and myself a little better for clarity’s sake.

I say I’m not a masochist because I don’t enjoy the actual sensation of pain. I do however really enjoy that my trusted partner is either turned on or finds some other positive from inflicting those sensations on me when he knows he’s making me uncomfortable . For whatever reason, it’s the ‘he likes that I don’t like this’ that I enjoy. Does that technically fall on the masochist spectrum? Maybe??? It depends on which definition you’re working with. I’m just not a pain puppy. I don’t dream of physical pain and I don’t get off from the actual sensations of pain.

Now for the Hubs. Another writer used the term “sensual sadist” on here before and I feel that applies to him. If there were a sadist spectrum he’d be Sadist Light. He doesn’t desire to push me to see how much pain I can/will take for him. He does enjoy taking his pleasure from me in ways that are emotionally complex for me (us?). I get the great subby feelings that feed my soul, he lets loose the sexual side of his dominance. He does seem to be growing and exploring this side of himself. I wrote in another post that he’d probably have trouble answering the question “Do you like face/throat fucking me so hard that it hurts me?”. I wrote that I assumed my sweet hubby would struggle with how he feels about it, but I asked him the question a week or two ago and he answered with “YES”. I must admit I really liked his emphatic answer.

Ok, now that you understand us a little better, I’ll try to answer your question. For us, the balance is struck from years of growing into this together. He’s not the kind of sadist that simply wants me to suffer more and more for him. (There’s no judgement here for other types of sadists.) He has studied my immediate and long term reactions to the uncomfortable and painful. We have awkward conversations about us each being happy I hurt for him. He cares about my pleasure a great deal and has done an AMAZING job at exploring what feels good to him, turns him on, fits inside my pain tolerance, feeds my subby heart, and brings us closer together.

In our situation, our desires just seem to line up. We lucked out on that one. He hasn’t expressed any interest to explore inflicting more pain on me. If he did, I’m sure we’d talk it out a lot. I’d do my best to give him whatever I’m capable of. In our relationship, he does have the freedom to explore and push a bit, safeword at the ready. I’ve told him many times that I’d rather be in a situation where we need to talk about maybe reeling in a certain activity or intensity level than for him to ever feeling unable to express himself and explore. I encourage him to try new things and he welcomes honest feedback. I guess that last sentence might be the takeaway here.

I fear our situation may not be of much help to you, sorry about that. We’re all so different when it comes to this stuff, but I suppose there’s always something we can learn from each other.

Again, it’s good that you know yourself and want to tread carefully.

[studyof-love-and-life]

Hi! I’m a first year uni student and I was wondering if you could help me out with something? It’s my second week and I’m already having trouble balancing my time. In general, how much time should I spend on each class outside of lectures a week? If it changes things I go to a decently prestigious school

[don’t feel pressured to respond if you don’t want to. I just saw your other advice posts and thought it was worth a shot :)]

Hi lovely! Figuring out time management was hard for me when I started undergrad, too. A general rule of thumb I've heard from professors is that for every credit/hour of class you have per week, you should spend 2-3 hours outside of lectures on that class. So in theory, for a 3 credit class you should spend 6-9 hours on it per week. However, I'd say that that isn't always the case! Sometimes you don't need that much time and sometimes you might need more, and I think that comes down to the class and professor more than the school (not the most helpful answer, I know, and I'm sorry for that)

I'm just going to brainstorm some general ideas below 💕

What are you studying? If you're in STEM, you might find yourself doing a lot of problem sets (my best friend was a math major and she was constantly doing work because each class would assign a certain amount of problems, and each would take a long time to do), and maybe some readings on top of that. She said that something that helped her was working with study groups can help keep you on track, and if you like them then it's even better because then you're hanging out with a friend too. She also set a cutoff time everyday where she would stop doing work so she could have a little time for herself

For me with linguistics, I had a LOT of readings to do for all my classes. Learning how to effectively skim texts and still understand the general point is a valuable skill, and it saves a lot of time! Most professors don't expect you to remember every single detail from readings, they often just want you to understand the argument and the general takeaway so you can apply it to the class (my point with asking what you're studying is that depending on the types of assignments, you might need different tips - even though I'd say my friend's tips can apply to anyone)

On a related note, lots of people take notes while reading. I had so many readings sometimes that I didn't have time for that, so if you're in a similar situation, instead of doing detailed reading notes, try reading your chapter/article, and then take a couple minutes to figure out your top 3 concepts from it that you think are most important and write those down with a quick blurb to refer to and what chapter/article the concept is from

Plan ahead and prioritize what you NEED to get done. Sometimes you won't get to everything, and you can't be too hard on yourself about it (which is easier said than done)

I've not tried this personally but I have some friends who set timers when they have multiple classes to study for. When the timer is up, they switch to the next class so they know they at least spent some time on it (it worked for them, maybe it would work for you! Again, I've not tried it)

As classes move forward and you have essays and projects come up, try to break them down into steps over multiple days/weeks. I've found doing that helps keep me from waiting until the last minute

I live by my planner. I tend to forget things if they're not written down, and it helps keep me organized as well (I write down my assignments in different colors based on what class they're for). I've found that if I can see everything I have to do it helps me prioritize and keep on track. Also it's silly but it really feels like you're getting things done when you get to cross things off, which can be oddly encouraging

Schedule in some time for yourself when you can. Part of balancing time in uni is making sure you're not being over worked. Join a club or make sure you have time to do something you enjoy, or even just time to relax :)

I hope this helps and I'm sorry I couldn't help more! Figuring out how to balance time can be pretty tailored to the individual and the classes being taken, but I hope any of these ideas are helpful! Also feel free to keep asking me things, or DM me if you want! You're going to do WONDERUL and AMAZING things ✨️

I'm also going to tag @peregrination-studies! She is my go-to studyblr buddy for if I need any tips or encouragement or a buddy to talk to 💛 check out her blog too (also hi grace! If you have anything you'd add, feel free but of course no pressure <3)

[byanyan]

for the headcanon meme - i feel like Byan encourages Flynn to like, relax and get out of his comfort zone more? Byan (to Flynn) seems to care so much less what people think and that's something he wants to emulate! And Flynn would go to bat for them in a second and absolutely use his blindness to get them out of trouble lmao

send a headcanon you have about our muses' relationshipㅤ ∘ ˚ ( accepting )

ㅤyessss, that's actually one of byan's better traits, even though there is sometimes something a bit harsh or peer pressure-y in the way they go about it. they absolutely do encourage flynn to just chill out, have a good time, and not care what anyone else thinks, though the words tend to come out really bluntly or they're dragging him along regardless of how comfortable he is. same goes with encouraging him out of his comfort zone, though that can end up in more of a similar territory to that of your bully in high school pointing and laughing and calling you names until you do the thing, which isn't always helpful. there are also times where they're actually pretty nice about it though!! it all just depends on the situation and their mood, they're very inconsistent and full of surprises smh.

i loooove the idea of flynn using his blindness to get them out of trouble though. i think byan finds it really funny in a lot of cases just because people will so suddenly stop questioning everything once his blindness is brought into it, regardless of how relevant it is to the circumstances. ...they also end up appreciating it a lot because there aren't a lot of people out there who watch their back like that, especially in those situations where they deserve whatever trouble they were in. will they ever say this to him directly? no, god no, absolutely not. but they do express it in their own weird little ways that seem completely unrelated.

[cerulean-dreams-18]

Siggy design for my au! She's about 14 here. Not really a fan of how either of these drawings turned out but oh well.

Head cannons/backstory for au sigurrós:

She's very tiny at the moment. Like 5 feet tall and 110 pounds soaking wet. Not sure yet if I want her to grow up and end up being like 6 foot tall and buff, or just stay the size she is now her whole life.

She's half Icelandic, half Korean.

She's a lesbian.

She usually goes by Sigs or Siggy.

She has a weird psychic connection with SCP-953. 953 is almost constantly talking to her telepathically. For some reason she just latched onto her when Sigs was a baby and ever since she's basically been living rent free in her head.

953 constantly degraded her and tried to influence her to do things she didn't want to do, like hurt or kill people. When she resisted, 953 was furious and would berate her and often encouraged her to hurt herself.

The staff assigned to be her primary caretakers for her for the first 8 years of her life were extremely neglectful. Since she was a newborn, they did the bare minimum to keep her alive. They had no emotional connection to her whatsoever, and would just ignore her every time she tried to connect with them.

Siggy is incredibly lactose intolerant. Her primary caretakers were told this by her doctors, but didn't really care. They still gave her milk and dairy products every day and as a result she often felt sick and in pain as a young child.

Higher ranking staff of the foundation like Gears, Kondraki, and Rights were the only people who actually showed care for her and gave her the validation and love her primary caretakers never provided. As a result, she always strived to impress the doctors and do everything they asked, to receive their approval. She was intrigued by Clef for as long as she could remember, and for some reason just kind of looked up to him even though she didn't see him very often. She'd often try to interact with him and even draw pictures or make gifts for him, but he had a similar apathetic reaction to her that her caretakers held, eventually growing to outright fear and dislike her. It hurt her immensely to know one of the people she likes most wanted her dead.

In this au, she was woken up from her coma a few months after the whole 239-b incident, right after her eighth birthday. Staff had an idea of how to better control her powers, but before they could act on their plan, she solved her own problem. Since she could have anything she wanted in the world, she decided she didn't want powers anymore after all the trouble they'd caused her, and wished to be normal forever. It worked, now she can't bend reality even if she wanted to.

The very same day she woke up, 953 accidentally lets slip to sigurrós her plan to breach containment and kill a bunch of staff. Siggy sees Clef is the first person she wants to kill, and immediately runs to find him and tell him, as she still doesn't want him to get hurt, even after he tried to kill her. She explains the whole situation to Clef, including how she and 953 are telepathically connected. Clef is horrified to learn what this kid has gone through for the past 8 years, and has a change of heart about her. She doesn't even have powers anymore. She's just a normal little girl.

953 did end up breaching containment, and still hasn't been found to this day, but she didn't manage to kill anyone thanks to precautions taken thanks to siggy's heads up. 935 let the 939s out of containment to distract staff while she escaped. One of the 939s very briefly got a hold of Siggy, and gave her the scars on her face and notch in her ear.

Clef kinda felt bad about Siggy's whole situation and ended up adopting her. Meri became her big sister. Later on Clef and Kondraki got together, so she gained an additional dad and Draven as a brother.

Her teeth are sharper than a normal human's should be, and her nails are as well. She has little fangs that just barely stick out of her mouth. Her ears are abnormally pointy.

Her irises are gray, and her pupils are slitted like a cat or a fox and change color depending on her mood. Her eyes are highly reflective and appear to "glow" at night.

953 is still in her head and trying to influence her to do things, even though she told everyone their connection severed after 953 breached containment.

She has adhd.

She has an insecure attachment style due to the way she was raised. She also suffers from depression and PTSD. She goes to therapy for it.

She constantly needs to be assured that she's loved.

She's a huge cuddle bug and will take any opportunity she can to snuggle with one of her dads or siblings. Clef is often her go-to because he's the biggest and comfiest, and she feels safe around him.

She'll just say and do completely out of the blue things. She's very chaotic, and her friends and family love that about her. She's very entertaining.

She, Draven, and Meri love to banter back and forth at each other. Sigs is the baby so she gets teased the most.

Her two best friends are Emma (040) and Cameron (2241). She and Emma have always kinda had a mutual unspoken crush on each other, while Sigs and Cameron are more like siblings.

She uses humor to cope with her trauma.

Clef and Kondraki both love grunge and rock music, and passed that love down to all their kids. Hence the Radiohead t shirt.

[mothmanyeetus]

PSA: Do not join VividSMP

This is a a post regarding the problematic VividSMP Discord server and why it is not worth it to join.

The moderation is bad on all fronts. Let’s start with the fact that I was kicked for “advertisement” allegedly (despite being in the advertisement channel) suspiciously right after a friend of the staff stated they weren’t happy I was there just because they decided that didn’t like me from another server. Here is the conversation I had with a mod.

I would like to add that they have considered my BPD episodes an “attitude” before.

Here they give me false hope by suggesting that if I “change my attitude” I would be let in. Here they are gaslighting me about suggesting such.

Here’s me calling them out and then them finally shedding some light on what happened, finally revealing they were not the one that kicked me despite acting like that was the case at first.

You’ll see here that they told me they would get in contact with the owner aka getting me in contact with him then guess what…

Yep, they blocked me 💀

So basically they lied to me. Now when I said this:

I was refering to this:

Yep, that’s the mod AND the owner leaving 5 star reviews of their server to make it look good.

-

Now I’m not the only one who’s been having trouble with Vivid. Here’s some friends from a previous server we were all in talking about how they wanted to put their little community into vivid as a new server but absolutely could not stand it.

Star recalls a similar situation to mine where someone was kicked without warning. This is also proof this isn’t just a me thing and it is a server thing.

Clearly, the staff value petty drama over running an actual functioning server.

A friend of theirs is now trying to defend since di stated I was making this post. Basically, stating that I deserved it and that every negative review is wrong or biased.

Blaming everyone except the moderation. They then revealed this:

A “soiled record” apparently.

Basically stating it was okay for me to be banned and never told I was making people uncomfortable when that isn’t fair to me as I didn’t know. They still try to justify it in later dms but alas I cannot post more pictures.

Takeaway:

Do NOT join VividSMP. It isn’t worth it and you’re only gonna end up being on a toxic server.

What can you do?:

Report them on Disboard and leave reviews explaining what they’ve done and why not to join. Report the staff members if you have their discord users. Warn your fellow players about this SMP and encourage anyone you know on it to leave.

This is absolutely ridiculous.

[vote-gaara]

The Sands of Time: Gaara's Story (Chapter 3)

Second chapter here Read on AO3

Chapter Summary: Gaara attends his first ever party, and things just don't go well for him...or do they?

Words: 2569

Warnings: No warnings, this one is all fluff.....Actually, lots of awkwardness so if you don't like second-hand embarrassment...

Author's Notes: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS ORIGINAL CHARACTERS. And their first conversation reads exactly like shifting a manual transmission with a worn out clutch. The awkwardness and horrible pacing is not a bug, it's a feature.

Chapter Three: The Party

Gaara stood pressed as close to the far corner of the room as he could. It was, after all, the best placement for him as to not accidentally bother anyone who was trying to avoid him - which happened to be everyone.

He had shown up to the Chunin Party with his brother and sister after having awkwardly asked Temari a few hours before if he could be invited.

“Oh!” Temari had said in surprise at his inquiry. “...Oh!” 

Gaara could sense her hesitation as her eyes glanced from side to side, undoubtedly trying to form an excuse to refuse, so he quickly retracted his request. “Nevermind, Temari. Forget it.”

“No, no,” Temari assured quickly, and Gaara had noted - quite glumly - that her fearful lilt was back. “It’s just…well…” She paused, then composed herself. “I just had plans to meet with friends at the party, and so I won’t be able to show you around, is all…” She trailed off, looking up at him with a look of uncertainty. 

“Forget it,” Gaara said. “I don’t want to trouble you.”

He proceeded to walk off, but Temari called to him. “Listen Gaara, go on ahead and get ready. You can come if you want, I’m sure it won’t be a big deal!” Her voice sounded confident but when Gaara looked back to meet her gaze, her eyes betrayed her.

***

Now Gaara deeply regretted his decision. After his conversation with Temari in the hallway of the estate, she had waited patiently alongside Kankuro for him to join them outside, and when Gaara arrived, he was met with a strained smile from his sister whilst his brother hadn’t so much as glanced at him. Together the three of them walked to the party in total silence, and upon entering the building where the event was being held, Kankuro disappeared almost instantly. Temari, to her credit, turned around to offer him a small, encouraging - if not a little pitying - smile to her youngest brother. 

“Well, I best be meeting with my friends…” She said, her eyes darting to the crowd of people. “Try and have some fun, okay?”

“Okay…” Gaara mumbled somberly as he lowered his head and watched his sister take her leave.  

It didn’t take long for Gaara to back himself into the corner with his arms crossed over his chest while he watched in misery as a large distance formed between himself and the crowd of party goers. It was as if his sand was making a forcefield around him and pushing others away, though this time his ultimate defense was not to blame. Rather, it was the desperation of everyone in attendance to not get too close to him, as Gaara observed  by the quick, fearful glances he occasionally caught being cast his way. 

A feeling similar to panic began fluttering in his chest, and before it could overwhelm him Gaara began searching for an objective to cling to, and his mind began breaking down the situation in a pragmatic way. So far his presence was not well received, and Gaara, too, found that he wasn’t exactly happy to be there; however, he was there for a purpose and he thought that it would have been a waste had he gone through all the effort just to back down now.

“Just one person’s gaze.” Gaara thought, as if making a promise to himself, and he got to work scanning the crowd, looking for anyone that may be receptive to him; yet all he saw was a sea of cold shoulders. It really was no use. Unfolding his arms, Gaara let out a deep, painful sigh. It was a bit ironic in a way: Gaara had his ultimate defense that would protect him and solely him, but to him it appeared that everyone had their own ultimate defense within each other. How was he supposed to break through and interject himself - to make a positive impression - when everyone was turning to each other for support, linking together like an unbreakable chain which Gaara had zero place in. 

“I was foolish to come,” Gaara thought to himself. 

Suddenly a figure parted from the crowd of people, sauntering confidently up to the offering table that was stationed next to Gaara’s own woefully solitary corner. He watched as the girl stood in front of the table, her eyes glittering like she had come across an entire cove of treasure. She smiled to herself, and Gaara was able to observe her fully.

She was shorter, much like Gaara was, and dressed in a tunic-like jacket with fur lining the collar and cuffs of her sleeves, the make of which seemed handcrafted. It was certainly an odd outfit, especially in the hot desert climate, but despite how out of place she seemed, she didn’t seem to care at all. In fact, she hummed to herself gleefully, rocking her head side to side, causing a bell to jingle which Gaara noted was attached to the red hair-tie that held back her short, brown hair. 

She continued this humming as she heaped a massive amount of food onto a plate, making her way to the end of the table nearest Gaara. Suddenly she stopped dead, tensed, and looked up at him as if a spotlight had been cast on her, revealing her in the midst of a crime. 

She seemed startled by him and the two of them stared at each other for longer than what would be considered comfortable to the average person. Then the girl unfroze gradually; slowly reaching down to her plate and grasping a chip between her fingers. She brought it to her mouth, slowly chewing as she continued to stare at him as if he were an exotic animal on display in a zoo. This continued on for a while longer until she cast a quick glance behind her and then back at him.

“Umm…” She said, her voice sounded in a place between uncertainty and rudeness. “Why are you staring at me?”

As if he was under some spell that was broken by her words, Gaara tore his gaze off her and looked away. He hadn’t meant to frighten her, or to really pay her much attention at all, but her confidence had caught him by surprise. People didn’t normally meet his eyes so easily, and in a way, she had startled him too.

Not thinking anything more about the interaction, Gaara’s mind drifted back to the problem at hand. He began forming his escape plan, looking through the mass of people towards the nearest exit, and carving a path in his head so that he may leave without inconveniencing too many people. However, his view was obstructed by the girl who had stepped in front of him.

“What?” Gaara said rudely. 

“What?” She shot back at him.

“What do you want?” Gaara was impatient now, annoyed that the girl was interfering with his efforts. 

“What do you want?” The girl insinuated, pointing a finger at him. “You’re the one who was staring at me.” She looked him over again then back at the crowds of people who seemed even more distant. “What, are you a weirdo or something?”

Gaara glared at her meanly and said with a lot of bitterness, “You’re in my way.” 

“No I’m not!” The girl laughed incredulously. “You’ve been standing in this corner the whole time!”

“Yes, well, I’m about to leave.” Gaara said, angrily. He was upset that he was wasting time engaged in a stupid conversation with this seemingly very stupid girl when he desperately wanted to return to his room and begin to figure out how to better connect with others.

Then another very abrupt thought occurred to him which made him feel foolish. Here in front of him was another person, and he realized with some alarm and embarrassment that he hadn’t considered her as such. 

The girl shrugged and stepped aside, allowing him to get past her as she turned her full attention to her plate of food. She paid him no mind for a few seconds until she noticed him staring at her again. 

“What?!” She cried, annoyed.

“Um…” Gaara started, awkwardly. “What’s your name?”

The girl’s eyebrows raised in surprise, and she thought for a moment. “Uhh..”

“Nevermind.” Gaara snapped, taking her hesitancy as rejection. 

“No,” The girl replied, “You can call me Kaiya, I guess.”

“Kaiya…” Gaara repeated. 

“Yep.”

“I see.”

The girl looked at him in an appraising manner. “What’s your name?” She asked. 

“My name…” Gaara said as he trailed off, thoughts swarming in his head as if he had disturbed a hornets nest. Most people recognized Gaara on sight, but this girl hadn’t, and judging from her attire, Gaara took this as meaning that she wasn’t from around here. Now his concern was that his notoriety had preceded him, and upon sharing his identity would cause the girl to turn and flee.

“My name is Gaara,” Gaara resigned, accepting that this would pound the final nail in his social coffin. He watched as Kaiya’s face twisted and her eyes narrowed.

“Gaara?” She asked. “Huh. Weird name for a weird person…Okay.” Then she did something wholly unexpected and offered him a very small smile.

“You…Never heard of me?” Gaara asked, cautiously.

“Well,” Kaiya paused as she thought, “No…Are you famous or something?”

“In a way…” Gaara mumbled so faintly that he was surprised when Kaiya’s demeanor brightened.  

“Really?!” She asked, excitedly. 

“No…” he said quickly in response. He got the inclination that he was conjuring his own bad luck by speaking too carelessly, and sought to filter more of his responses.

Kaiya’s face was of utter perplexity for a moment, but then her eyes sparkled with amusement. She smiled as if understanding a joke. 

“Weird guy!” She laughed. “What are you doing here in the corner all by yourself, then?”

Gaara didn’t answer and instead turned away. The conversation, as far as he could tell, was not going well for him, and Kaiya’s words stung. He reasoned that if she thought he was weird, it was best to not interfere with her anymore. 

However, Kaiya did not move from where she stood next to him and repeated her question. “Why are you standing here?”

“I don’t come to parties often,” Gaara responded dismissively. 

“Oh…” Kaiya responded in surprise and a heavily awkward silence fell between them, like the static of a walkie talkie. “So…Can I ask you a question?” She inquired after a while. 

‘What is it?”

Kaiya gestured with her hand as if rewinding the conversation. “Are you being funny?”

“I’m not being funny,” Gaara said crossly.

“Oh!” Kaiya exclaimed and Gaara stared up at her as if she were an idiot, causing her to elaborate. “I’m just confused about why you asked if I had heard of you which made me think you were famous, y’know? Then you said you weren’t famous so I thought you were joking about the whole thing, but now it doesn’t seem like you were.”

Gaara blinked at her, following along with her thought process.

“So which is it: Are you or aren’t you famous?”

“I’m not famous.” Gaara said.

Kaiya made an incredulous face and her voice was insinuating. “Are you lying?”

“I wasn’t lying.” Gaara insisted. He was frustrated with the conversation now as it seemed to him like it was going nowhere. 

“So you’re not famous?” Kaiya asked for the sake of certainty. 

“No…” Gaara started, then he paused to think about how to explain it before giving up. “Nevermind!”

Kaiya’s eyes widened in amusement and she burst into laughter which irritated Gaara.  

“I’m not joking!” He insisted. 

“I don’t think you are,” Kaiya laughed, shaking her head, “I just don’t understand you, is at all. What a weird conversation!”

“I don’t understand you.” Gaara retorted, “What do you want, anyways? Why are you here?”

“Well actually,” Kaiya settled down for a moment to shrug, her voice was more casual, “I just wanted to know why you were staring at me, and then this conversation with you turned into a complete trainwreck, if I am gonna be honest.”

“Then why are you still talking to me?” Gaara snapped.

“Because,” Kaiya said, shrugging again, “At the very least, you’re kinda interesting.”

***

Gaara was astonished by this statement and he found that his mouth hung open slightly, though just as soon as he was able to reflect on what this meant for him, Kaiya dissolved any kindness that may have derived from it. 

“Y'know, I've never met a socially inept person before,” She said innocently, munching on another chip. “I wonder if you could be famous for something like that. If I were famous, it'd probably be for being socially inept, or maybe for becoming a serial killer! You ever hear about any famous serial kille- Hey! Where are you going?!” 

Gaara had abruptly begun walking away from her. He didn't know what her intentions were, but her insistence in talking to him suddenly made crystal clear sense.  

“Whoever sent her, she's probably a distraction.” Gaara thought, scanning the crowds for any shinobi that may leap out and attack him. Of course his detractors would send a ninja who he wouldn’t immediately recognize in order for him to lower his guard. Whatever plot it was, it was a poorly crafted one, and her code words were too obvious to see through.  

“Hey!” Kaiya leapt forward, catching up with him and following along with his hurried steps as the crowd parted in front of them. “Where are you going?” 

“I said I was leaving,” Gaara shot back curtly, not slowing his pace or turning to look at her. 

Kaiya slowed slightly as he broke away, widening the gap between them. She said something that was drowned out by the crowd and Gaara turned to confront her. 

“What did you say?” 

“I said I'm sorry,” Kaiya said, tugging at her sleeves uncertainty. She had abandoned her plate of food when she chased after him. “I don't actually think you're weird…well, I mean I do, but not in a bad way. More so that I meant you're weird like me…maybe?” She looked somewhat helpless, shifting her weight between her feet. 

“Who sent you?” Gaara demanded. 

The statement seemed to confuse Kaiya and her fidgeting stopped as she looked at him, puzzled. “Who sent me?” Kaiya asked before brightening a bit. “Oh, I'm not sure what his name is, but he was nice enough to give me this invitation.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper with the date, time and address of the party. She handed it to Gaara who studied it. 

Kaiya continued, “I'm not from around here, so I wasn't really sure what to expect coming here. I just thought it might be a good place to meet new people.” 

Shifting his attention back to Kaiya, Gaara studied her face and realized that his suspicions of her were misplaced. Though she may very well be an idiot, she seemed overall harmless, not at all like a shinobi who had received years of training. 

‘I see.” 

“Did you grow up here?” Kaiya asked, warmly. 

“Yes…” 

She offered him a small, uncertain smile. “Well if you’re leaving the party anyways, maybe I could come with you and you could show me around?”

With that, Gaara stared at her, at a complete loss on how to proceed.

[hiveruled-moved]

character info sheet.

name. Kai Joseph Langdon

name meaning. The name Kai has Welsh origins but means different things in other cultures. Most often if you look it up it gives the Hawaiian meaning; 'The Sea', but in Welsh origin it means 'Keeper of the keys and earth'

alias( ses ). Divine Ruler (by cult members only), Councilman or Councilman Anderson.

two pictures you like of your character.

three headcanons you never told anyone.

( ** There really aren't many if any headcanons I've never shared with people, I've had Kai for 6 years as a muse in total. But I'll recycle some really old ones from my first blog fgbfdhbg )

i. Kai knows how to play piano...or knew how to play piano at one point I should say. He hasn't touched one since he was in high school. ii. His handwriting is awful. Like good luck reading anything he's ever wrote on paper, even he has trouble deciphering it sometimes (example below of how I wrote it once and I still think it's neater than what he'd do.)

iii. This is kind of implied canon more than a headcanon but who cares. Kai changes out the rose on his parents bedroom door frequently, even adding some other flowers his mom liked sometimes.

three things your character likes to do in their free time.

i. Play video games like Mortal Ko.mbat, Ca.ll of Du.ty, GT.A, etc.

ii. Browse and post on redd.it / 4c.han / tw.itt.er because he's one of Those.

iii. Explore abandoned buildings.

three people your character loves.

Winter Anderson - His little sister, practically almost like a daughter in his eyes in my personal headcanon. Kai helped raise her since they were both kids and their mother suffered from mental illnesses and sometimes had trouble putting her attention on them and taking care of her abusive husband at the same time. Regardless of their differences and everything they've been through, they've stuck by each other's sides. Even though they shouldn't have. It would've been better for Winter in the end at least if she hadn't.

Julie Anderson - His mother whom he holds at a higher regard than she most likely deserved. But Kai was always a momma's boy and definitely Julie's favorite child out of the bunch, you'll never catch him admitting anything negative about her. He'll say that she did her best despite the situation. Kai just wishes he could've stopped her from aiming the gun at her mouth that night. Losing her like that broke something in him that never did recover.

Jon Stark ( @perzysprumia ) - His childhood best friend. Honestly these two are the trope of they're a similar character with one of them getting corrupted over time. Jon is someone he was always able to turn to and entrust the true nature of his home life with. Though, it was fairly easy to do so when Jon actually lived with the Anderson family at one point. Kai has always had a difficult grasp on romantic love, wasn't sure if he ever felt it a day in his life. Until Jon returned, until he devoted himself to him and the cult despite not agreeing with the murder aspect of Kai's movement, despite Kai not being the man he once knew. Kai is undoubtedly in love with him, but it doesn't mean its healthy for either of them.

two things your character regrets.

i. Killing Winter and Vincent. More-so Winter than Vincent since he discovered she didn't actually betray him so he basically killed her for nothing. As much as he believes it was necessary with his older brother, looking back after he's gone, he really wishes he had him around to give advice. ii. Not killing Ally. He knows it was a mistake to trust her, but his own curiosity to push on people's fragile mental states and manipulate mixed with his paranoia and delusions at the time really just made him cling on to the idea that maybe just maybe Ally was a good person to have on his side. That Ozzy may in fact be his son despite him knowing he wasn't. And despite him literally encouraging her wife to torment and leave her smh.

three phobia's your character has.

i. Failure, more specifically not leaving behind or doing anything to be remembered for. ii. Open / deep water or drowning, this is something that makes him uncomfortable more than fearful, but it isn't really a factor in most cases. iii. Being betrayed by those closest to him. He has major trust issues.

Tagged by: @langdhon <3

Tagging: anyone that sees this and wants to do it, you're tagged now!

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Alright, I’m going insane about the Minis again before I go make my dinner at 4am. Longish post ahead beware! Mostly under a read more again. Enjoy!

SO

Given the Minis were Roxy’s first friends in the Pizzaplex, and Security Bots are programmed to capture them on sight, Roxy is very protective of them. She does not trust any Staffbot of any kind anywhere near them, and thus, now that she’s in control of the Raceway, the amount of Staffbots and Security Bots decreases drastically. The Minis are appreciative of this move of course, but it’s still nerve wracking being out in the open for long periods of time. This is where they have some issues when working alongside Roxy.

They spend the majority of time before their official debut as the Pit Crew having to get used to being in the middle of the Raceway. They could always do it before, sure, but only after Roxy had obliterated all the Security Bots in the area. Being able to just… hang out now? Anywhere they want within the Raceway, Salon and lobby? It feels weird to them. Like, really weird. The lack of bots everywhere makes the place feel so much bigger and so much emptier that’s it starts giving the five of them (Roxy included here) the spooks after a while. You can hear a fuckin’ pin drop in there now and it’s uh. Really jarring compared to the day time.

Now I just said a moment ago that due to the Security Bots, Roxy is really protective of the Minis. This is also true in reverse. The Minis will throw down for Roxy. They’ve been there when she’s been crying more times than they can count and despite Roxy being known for holding grudges, the Minis never fucking forget. They only have so much patience so there’s only so much you can get to Roxy before you suddenly have four very angry spiders coming for you and they’re arguably worse. With Roxy, you at least have an idea of what you’re getting into. With the Minis? Fuck knows. You could get haunted for months or you could get a singular jumpscare. You could never be able to find anything ever again or things could randomly fall on you from the ceiling. You just never know with these guys!

How does this manifest in New Management AU? WELL

Tough customers being dicks about four spider animatronics are going to get a face full of Roxy very fucking quickly and anyone giving Roxy a hard time is gonna have a few harmless, yet very meaningful and obvious ‘accidents’ start happening to them just as quickly. Tippy is great for those moments in particular since he can get Roxy away from the situation while the others redirect somewhere else or get a staff member to come and help. You know the three strikes and your out rule? That’s the general rule in the Raceway, however, Roxy has made it very clear that anyone who tries to harm her little Pit Crew in any way, shape or form, is getting banned. Anywhere from a week up to years, she will not hesitate. The Minis don’t have the power to do that but they will encourage and talk Roxy into being much more liberal with bans when it comes to weeding out the piece of shit customers. You’d not expect her to be a soft touch, and she’s not most of the time but sometimes the four of them are almost begging her to realise that someone is causing her more trouble than they’re worth and she deserves to not have to deal with them every single day. Obviously, there’s only so much you can do in a customer service/entertainment job such as this, but some things should not be tolerated and the five of them make sure of that. They make a great team!

Speaking of teamwork, where Roxy would always drift away from the group of kids to make sure the loners got plenty of attention, that’s now four times easier to do. With the Minis, a lot less people are left unentertained and they gain a similar type of fanbase to Roxy. It’s a dedicated little fanbase for each of them, maybe not as big as it would be if they poured more energy into the large group, but their fans are much more loyal and care much more about them as a result. And with five animatronics in the Raceway at once, they’re hardly leaving a large group of guests unattended anymore so they’re covering all their bases now anyway.

One of the things I really want to add for them is a soft play area for smaller kids. I don’t know where I’d put it yet, maybe somewhere in the salon tunnels or by the raceway stands or something, but it would be themed entirely around them. A spider and racing themed soft play area that, is the perfect size for them. They basically have their own playground dedicated to them that the smaller kids can enjoy with them and I just think that’d be a really cool thing for them to have. It would also be pretty helpful for when they want to entertain, but being out in the open is too much for them at any given time. They now have a mostly enclosed and safe area to run around in where they don’t have to worry about that.

I have more for how they appear in everyone else’s attractions but I keep getting distracted so this will do for now.

[ragingstillness]

I know its been awhile but Heisenberg was kinda like Lucas from RE7 and I did love that part of 7 where a fight between Lucas and Ethan was set up with Lucas luring Ethan around with an item he needed and there are traps and enemies that are frustrating (those 4 legs are the worst it will be fun to see how my sister deals with them) giving it but never happens for Ethan but Chris does get to do it is satisfying as fuck (I also love the cutscene that plays at the end of Not a hero becuase it felt real Chris has been doing this all for so long and he has seen a lot of people die a lot of friends die- his past is why I love the name they chose for the dlc "not a hero")

Sorry anon I’m afraid I’m a little confused. Are you asking me a question or for my opinion? I’m also a tad confused as to what you’re saying but I’ll address the parts I get and I hope it’s what you were looking for.

Lucas vs Heisenberg:

I absolutely agree that they’re similar. Different motivations but similar execution and somewhat similar personalities.

Heisenberg and Lucas both present themselves as deranged and sadistic. Imo the difference is that this is Lucas’ true self while a lot of Heisenberg’s presentation is a performance. “Lycans and Gentlemen!” “I’ll put on a show everyone can enjoy” Heisenberg is performing for an audience, partially his ‘siblings’ but mainly Miranda. Considering how deep Miranda’s surveillance and control go, it’s likely that she both encouraged this behavior in Heisenberg and that he figured out that this was the behavior that she expected, thereby causing her to overlook him. Because Heisenberg is essentially a hostage. It’s mentioned in one of the journals or lab reports that Miranda kidnapped Heisenberg at a young age. Strong nature vs nurture argument. But when Heisenberg is alone with Ethan, no audience, his voice drops in pitch, it becomes serious and angry. This is Heisenberg not having fun. It’s important to note here that Heisenberg has his own surveillance network, likely put in place to detect Miranda. Therefore, when he’s in his factory, only using the mutamycete under controlled circumstances, it’s the only time he isn’t potentially being watched by anyone from his “audience.” After Ethan rejects his proposal, Heisenberg turns the sadistic front back on but more as an intimidation factor than anything else. I’m not saying Heisenberg’s secretly a nice guy, he isn’t, but the sadistic front is likely overplayed.

Lucas, on the other hand, is just “like that.” It’s mentioned that he’s always been considered troubled by the locals and you find many inventing trophies in his rooms. This all predates Eveline. Now an argument could be made that in the present Lucas is in the same boat as Heisenberg, just with Eveline as an audience. And an ever-present one as she’s able to be inside his head from the mold infection. However, it is eventually discovered that Lucas linked up with the Connections at some point and has in fact been cured of the mold for all of RE7. Therefore, while she still pops up unexpectedly, Eveline is not a constant audience. And yet Lucas’ behavior doesn’t change regardless of the situation. He’s no hostage, he’s active, he’s having fun, he doesn’t give a shit about his family or anyone else.

Chris:

I agree that the name of the dlc was well-chosen considering Chris’ background. It also has a sense of “too little too late” to it that makes sense considering how late Chris arrives to RE7.

As for the dlc itself I’m afraid I can’t comment because I’ve never gotten around to watching a playthrough.

Hope this gives you what you wanted Anon!

[sansloii]

💞 friends with benefits 💚 rivals 🖤 enemies Chaos for Mikah and Vex? 👀

ooooooooOOOOOOOOOO-- i am here for the chaos

okay so like.... mikah's already looking at Vex with major side eye. like "you live like this? girl, what the fu--" and the fact that in the ask you sent me ( that i'm gonna answer ), he kept them out until the wee hours of the morning has them so fucking pressed. they're like "why did i agree to this, why the fuck am i with you? I'm going the fuck home don't fucking talk to me--" but the best part is that they'd do it again. maybe not the next day ( or the next couple if they've got shit to do that week that doesn't involve subjecting themself to Vex's company ) but Vex's personality and behaviors is.... pretty compatible with the very chaotic, devil-may-care attitude that mikah can embody. so no matter how much they bitch and moan about Vex and the things he does ( or the trouble he attracts ) you can bet your ass they're meeting him halfway in whatever trouble he feels like causing. they'll encourage him, they'll cause trouble, commit crimes with him, get tossed out of places, and so much more and be cackling the entire way because it's really fun for them.

to this point, i feel like... it'll almost be second nature for them butt heads or get hostile with each other for... god knows what reason. it's kinda that situation where they're similar, to some degree, so they'd naturally be able to get under each other's skin pretty well. to the point where it's feasible for them to legitimately be angry with each other. maybe they wouldn't be like. full on enemies ( or 👀 maybe they could? mikah has a little "not being able to die" issue among other things but that's fine ) but they'd definitely have something. i can see them flipping between being rivals and enemies again and again and again but they never really get to the point of actually killing each other because if they do, that's it. that ends the fun for them both so why the fuck would they do that?

it's possible to be friends with benefits with mikah but it'll take a while for mikah to effectively reciprocate. and will likely be a lot of teasing and denial on mikah's end. flirting and playing hard to get and all that is something mikah is good at and it will not bother them at all if Vex pokes and prods at them for it. but if he pushes them too much, they'll push back. just like "oh i'm a tease, mon amour? but you still want something from me? okay, since you asked for it--" and give the man a boner in that bar or club or wherever they are and just leave him like that. they'll 100% go home to prove a point too and act like they didn't do a thing wrong the next time they see him with the stupidest little "you wanted to fuck me so bad it made you look stupid" smile.

to tie them into that dynamic, it just takes time and a handful of very vulnerable "if you talk about this to anyone, i'll skin you" moments shared between the two of them. mikah's all about trust with sex--even if it's a meaningless outlet with very little strings attached--because even god's sexiest angels ignore what's between their legs and experience body dysmorphia. i don't know how much they could truly trust Vex but there has to be some semblance of it going both ways. mutually assured destruction works too, if they end up hate fucking for whatever reason.

@distopea | what kinda relationships we talkin' here?