#just D-level trolling

[romanyeva]

Achievement unlocked

Received my first negative comment on AO3.

[kacievvbbbb]

I don’t know why, maybe because I’ve been on a Garp kick lately.

But I do really think that Garp kind of became like a surrogate Uncle to the Roger boys and by extension Mihawk. Like I can just imagine Roger telling them that if they were ever separated from the crew or if something ever happened to him or Ray and they needed help they should go to Garp (I mean he entrusted his own baby to him it makes sense he’d also entrust his boys)

(for whatever reason Mihawk got this talk too despite him already traveling by himself and not being officially part of Rogers crew. But since Ray adopted him he’s Roger’s brat as well)

All this to say that Garp takes his uncle duties very seriously and what is an uncle if not an inconvenience and an embarrassment?

So Ofcourse he pulls up to Kuriagina during the timeskip (Hawain shirt and all) to visit his new grand babies (read Perona and Zoro) that he’s heard so much about. (read shanks immediately gossiped with him abou mt after stumbling upon them last time he came to visit Mihawk)

And because Garp is essentially the one piece equivalent of Florida man, this goes well for absolutely nobody

Except Zoro who is nothing if not a troll. And game must recognize game.

The monkeys love him tho, he communicates with them on a wavelength nobody can quite understand least of all Garp.

[rotteneldritchhorror]

Homestuck shipping charts will never be easy to read, there are simply way too many characters, even on the most surface level

[erose-this-name]

humans are not the default race

In every scifi and fantasy setting with """races""", humans are the default.

If you're lucky, we're the short-lived, fast-reproducing pests that are all white Europeans for some mysterious reason, and also have disproportionate rates of being raised as undead because we can't be bothered to make zombie dwarf minis or animate a vampire gnome that has to jump up to bite a tall person's neck.

(We've got BOTH human AND elf skeleton warriors! Oh, hey, I just changed the scale, now it's a hobbit skeleton OR a giant skeleton! Such skeleton diversity! No, Khajiits can't be bone boys, a skeleton with a tail and a cat skull is just TOO SPOOKY)

I feel like a lot of people don't realize that we (Homo sapiens) have the longest running endurance of any land animal. Being able to run a marathon is not normal.

(It's because we evolved the very unusual hunting strategy of Slowly Chasing Gazelles While Throwing Sticks At Them Until The Gazelle Collapses From Exhaustion Then Casually Walking Up And Bashing Their Head In With A Rock™).

Even Neanderthals probably couldn't match our tenacity (they were considerably stronger and tougher though, but by no means dumber judging from the size of their brain cavities{which was bigger than ours actually})

(the evolutionary Neanderthal hunting strategy was probably something like Jumping Out And Stabbing A Wooly Rhinoceros With A Pointed Stick, Then Getting Punted 12 Feet Into a Tree But Getting Right Back Up And Doing It Again Until It Dies Because You Have Superhuman Bone And Muscle Density. And If You Do Break One Of Your Unbreakable Bones Your Homies Will Take Care Of You Until It Heals™

[Neanderthal skeletons are found with healed fractures surprisingly often despite said bones being much stronger and denser than ours, they just kept evolving denser bones until they couldn't even swim without sinking like a rock, but they still got broken all the time])

So given that we, Homo sapiens, actually literally used to be the "species that specializes in sheer endurance, determination, and unbreakable fucking will", I want more fantasy and scifi settings where we are that way! I think the only setting where that's even remotely the case is Undertale. We're not just the "default" intelligent species!

The only reason we're good at everything is because we can make complex tools and can learn and aren't bound by instinct. Which, by definition, all fantasy races would also be able to do. Otherwise, they'd just be considered animals. Like trolls or Redditers.

The "default" species should just be really good at making tools and quickly adapting, but kinda suck in every other category. So I guess gnomes or goblins are the default d&d race.

And Humans are certainly not the Tolkien "that one race that lives short lives and reproduces faster than everyone else and is good at farming" because:

A) we actually do already live relatively long lives for mammals of our size and also GIVING BIRTH CAN KILL US, AND IF OUR PARENTS DON'T RAISE US JUST RIGHT THAT CAN ALSO KILL US, WE ARE SPECIFICALLY VERY BAD AT REPRODUCING

B) we are in no way adapted to farming, and most of our modern health and societal issues stem from the fact that we aren't meant to farm or be civilized, but do it anyways.

We only farm because it helped us survive the ecological collapse at the end of the ice age, now we're in too deep to go back.

When the ice age ended (quite abruptly) the ecosystem couldn't provide for hunters and gathers anymore, a bunch of things were getting heat stroke, sea levels rose, hibernation and bloom cycles and reptile gender ratios were out of wack, predators died out because herbivores died out because plants weren't doing well. Decomposers like vultures and worms had a field day (Until they didn't [RIP condor population]). It would take a while for a new ecological equilibrium to emerge and for evolution to fix things.

But farming doesn't need any healthy ecosystems except for the soil and pollinators, mostly, so that still works. And farming makes more food meaning you can have more people. So now there's more people.

But that also means you can't ever go back to foraging without all those extra people dying of starvation. So, anarcho-primitivism would technically be the most deadly ideology if implemented, and therefore is not based, unfortunately. Here's hoping for an apocalypse to do that for us! (I would not survive it)

Fun Fact: those isolated tribal societies like the Sentinelese that still do hunting and gathering only spend 15-20 hours a week doing that and another 20 doing camp chores, and the rest of their time forming meaningful relationships and not being depressed.

Notice how most of what they do as "work" (hunting, fighting, hiking, berry/mushroom/etc picking, cooking, camping, arts and crafts, oral history/story telling) are things that we need to do during our limited free time as "hobbies" just so that our "work" doesn't drive us insane. Thus leaving less time for relationships, etc.

If we were actually good at farming or industry or civilization, then things like math and repetitive manual labor wouldn't be work. They'd be the most fun activities.

Sure, these foragers die young, but so did medieval peasant farmers who were even less healthy since they had much less diverse diets (a lot of carbs) and got plague more often thanks to cities and their close proximity to livestock. Our modern sedentary lifestyle is bad too.

Hobbits are suited to farming (also Entwives I guess). Hobbits are quite good at it, at the cost of not being as good at much else (besides going unnoticed and throwing for some reason), they inherently enjoy farming life quite a bit and most* aren't haunted by the sense they should be anything else, like we are. *(The Took family got that Call To Adventure 'tism)

We only think that we're not special or can't be anything other than what we currently are because we no longer have anything else to compare ourselves to. The Neanderthals and Denisovans died out tens of thousands of years ago and the fucking aliens are somewhere, presumably

We are special, only we survived.

But at the cost of becoming the species equivalent of an abandoned child raised by wolves. We fantasize about these things because we all know that we shouldn't be alone. But our perceptions of ourselves are twisted by our trauma and lack of socialization.

Personally, the realization that having lost our family was probably our fault makes that hurt so much worse.

[pilfappreciator]

Part 1 | Part 2

WAKE UP BABES!! DINNER IS SERVED!!!

Bruce/Brandi x Reader: part 2

Includes: GN! Reader, Vacay Lovers, polyamory, relationship headcanons, slight Bruce Jr. slander

💜 These two took things slow when they were wooing you, you better BELIEVE they're gonna do the same once you've actually been bagged

🧡 I MEAN DON'T GET ME WRONG!! They're not any less passionate about you or anything, but like... c'mon. They're middle-aged, run a full time business and are married with kids. They've got a lot on their hands already so chances are they're not immediatly urging you to move in with them or just straight up sign marriage documents (sorry to disappoint u_u)

💜 But like I said: this doesn't mean they're not good lovers

🧡 In fact I'd say in my entirely unbiased opinion that they'd make fantastic lovers! Wonderful! Superb, even!

💜 So naturally, once you find yourself added to the relationship? Expect all that supportive energy thrown your way too lol

🧡 No matter what endeavor you choose to pursue, rest easy knowing you'll have your own personal cheerleaders having your back at all times. You got a hobby you're really into? SAY LESS BABES!! Gift-giving is Brandi's love language so you bet your ass she's buying you everything you could possibly need. Wanna pursue some form of higher education, maybe get some fancy degree? BOOM, you've just signed yourself up for study sessions with Bruce

💜 (I mean like... he might not be much help if you're studying for something shmancy like law or medicine, but he will happily hold and read out flashcards for you :3)

🧡 Or maybe you just wanna help out around Vacay Island which? Yes hello they would love that??

💜 Running a business is no easy feat so the couple definitely welcome the extra set of hands (paws??). If you're more social and outgoing then chances are you're out on the front lines with Bruce, taking orders for food, welcoming guests and getting them settled in, leading activites like volleyball or the weekly shuffleboard tournament, etc.

🧡 Obviously if you'd rather remain behind the scenes, you're more than welcome to join Brandi on her end of things. Making food, booking guests into their rooms, keeping track of all the finances, etc.

💜 Maybe you're crap with spreadsheets and numbers and just wanna like... keep her company while she works at her desk? Grab her some refreshments every now and then?? Maybe even offer a shoulder massage once you've noticed she's been hunched over for too long???

🧡 I swear this woman will cherish you forever

💜 Whether you're another troll like Bruce or a fellow Vacationer like Brandi, the way you spend time with either of these two can differ

🧡 If you're on the smaller side? Bruce just enjoys getting to hold your hand while walking alongside you on the beach. The man spends pretty much all his time around literal giants and it can get a little overwhelming sometimes, so he can definitely appreciate having someone around who's more on his level (hehe). Brandi on the other hand just thinks your small size is cute! Hands down one of her favorite things is when either you or Bruce (OR BOTH) just like? Casually hitch a ride on her shoulder?? Or she'll hold you both in the palm of of her hand and just go "omigosh it's totally like holding a couple of grapes haha :D"

💜 Reader POV: Ah yes. Me, my boyfriend, and our giant girlfriend/wife

🧡 On the flipside, if you're closer to Brandi's size? This woman is taking every available opportunity to take full advantage of the fact. She's laying kisses all over your face, running her fingers through your hair, cuddling with you after a long day of work, etc etc. Technically speaking she COULD (and DOES) do all this regardless of how big/small you are... but at the same time it's just soooo much easier when she doesn't have to constantly watch herself so she doesn't accidentally crush you ://

💜 Meanwhile Bruce is just like "if either of you DO crush me... you won't hear any complaints from my end, just sayin"

🧡 Man is horrendously down bad 😳

💜 Last post i was like OUTINGS WITH BRANDI, but this post?? SURFING LESSONS WITH BRUCE! This man will not rest until you know how to ride a wave, okay, he is DEDICATED. Once you've gotten good enough, expect regular invites to the beach so you two can hit the ocean asdjahdslak

🧡 I like to think that even while running a business and family, Bruce and Brandi are still perfectly capable of maintaining a healthy love life— both with each other and you. Partly because they're just that in love but also cuz they don't let ANYTHING get in the way of weekly date nights (yeah that's right, plural)

💜 Bruce, on the phone: "Hey honey, me and (____) are outside the resturaunt. Where are you?"

"Oh, I'll probably be a few minutes. Bruce Jr. just set off a firework in the kitchen, you know how he is. But you two should go get us a table while you're waiting!"

"Alright, we'll see you later, love you :)"

"I love you guys more~"

🧡 And then Bruce just... hangs up and leads you inside the resturaunt, meanwhile you're just?? Very concerned????

💜 Dates with these two are pretty casual ngl. Neither feel the need for extravagant displays of love, so chances are the three of you are just spending some quality time together. Chillin at home without the kids, cooking/baking food together, watching reality TV

💜 (Tbh there's probably some trollverse version of The Bachelor/Bachelorett and lemme tell you that these two EAT THAT SHIT UP)

🧡 Of course if you wanna go out somewhere fancy then no worries!! Your girl Brandi knows the downlow on all the hottest spots in town and Bruce likely has enough connections to get you three reservations at even the fanciest restaurants

💜 Simply ask and these two will find a way to get it done <33

🧡 LOTS OF FAMILY OUTINGS WITH THE VACAY LOVERS HOUSEHOLD!!!

💜 At some point in the relationship Bruce will approach you and go "Hey, our son Benni has a dance recital tomorrow, did you wanna come?" and the second you say yes is the second you offically become a permanent member of the family. You are joining their monthly family camping trips. You are helping Brandi make cupcakes for school soccer games. You and Bruce are sitting down with the kids for homework help

🧡 Hopefully you've got good memory cuz you're gonna need to memorize 13 different fast food orders whenever the kids drag you to Bergen King askdhalslk

💜 Speaking of the little shits

🧡 You thought you were spending a lot of time with them BEFORE you were smoochin their parents?? Well congrats because the second you start becoming a permanent member at the dinner table, expect to have all 13 of them constantly hanging off you

💜 Maybe one of them needs your help practicing a new move they've learned from their martial arts class, maybe another wants someone to listen as they info dump about their latest hyperfixation, or maybe they just need help kickstarting their underground fireworks selling business

🧡 Cough cough (Bruce Jr) cough cough

ASJKJDHALJSKD THIS WAS SO MUCH FUN, I LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCH!! There were a for more headcanons i wanted to touch upon but the post was getting long lol. Definitely plan on doing more for them tho so no worries uwu

but i mean like if you guys got prompts/questions then go ahead, my asks are open 👀👉👈

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Ok a line has been crossed and I am not ok with it on any level. Trolling is never ever ok.

After one of them made a comment on my correctly tagged post (now blocked and reported) they have clearly made a post about it with my url @‘d and as a result I have just had my inbox spammed by over 30 (and climbing) bt stans on anon telling me my url is offensive and they they hope I and Eddie get stage 4 terminal cancer so my url will actually be a relevant reference to something.

The originator was clearly looking to cause trouble by coming into the anti tags after the episode.

I am fully aware the people who actually need to see this won’t but saying that to anyone regardless of ship or fandom or anything is seriously hideous behaviour and it’s not ok.

It makes it very clear they are new to the 911 fandom and have never seen any bts stuff pre s7 especially related to Eddie. For those who don’t know stage four Eddie diaz is a reference to a post Ryan made about Eddie’s new haircut and job going into 5b (Eddie’s breakdown era).

Regardless of that that is an awful thing to wish on a character on a show. That is wishing death on them.

But the biggest and most problematic part of it all is the wishing terminal cancer or any stage of cancer for that matter on someone - a real life human being who opens up their inbox and sees those messages.

A real life human being who may be affected by cancer in their real not online life. A real person who might be enjoying an escape from the reality of cancer and cancer treatment through fandom.

I don’t have cancer but I did loose my mother to cancer when I was 18. It’s not something I would wish on my worst enemy.

The entire thing has left me feeling upset. Fandom is supposed to be a safe and enjoyable space if you cannot respect other peoples opinions and ships then maybe don’t engage with fandom.

They won’t win - I’m made of stronger stuff then that but I cannot let it go without saying anything more widely because who knows what others are getting in their inboxes that might have an impact on their mental health and well-being.

[inbarfink]

So although Order of the Stick is explicitly textually not an actual D&D game with actual players, it’s pretty cool how well Belkar’s character arc work not just as your usual ‘asshole character learns to care’ story but also mirrors the narrative of an asshole troll player learning to play the game seriously.

Like, while the whole Order kinda plays on standard D&D Class Stereotypes on some level, Belkar was always the one who played more into a Player Archetype than a Character Archetype. Maybe because that Player Archetype is often defined as lacking an interest in serious Roleplaying.

I mean, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to play a tabletop RPG just for dice-throwing and violence. The problem with That Kind Player is more when they attach themselves to a group that is otherwise interested in character and plot - and rather than finding some sort of compromise with the rest of the group or just looking for a new one more amicable to random violence - they keep hanging around while expressing just a total disinterest in the plot.

And caring for really nothing but scoring as many kills as possible, even if it gets in the way of the group’s general strategy...

And/or the DM trying to tell a compelling narrative...

And sometimes just being disruptive and causing conflict for the lols.

Also, Belkar has, like, objectively the worst build in the entire Order and he started out with no understanding of his Class outside the Two-Weapon Fighting. He really does act just like the One Guy who really wanted to play a double-wielding character because it’s badass, saw it’s a Free Ranger Feat and refused to read any of the other features or flavor text of the class.

So when he befriends Mr. Scruffy, it’s not just the ‘Mean Character Warms His Heart to a Cute Animal’ trope - it’s also figuratively about a player learning how to actually play and roleplay his Class and use other class features that are not directly related to just Stab the Enemies and They Fall Down.

And so much of his character arc is about the realization that he doesn’t really know himself. It is a character arc from an in-universe person but it also parallels a narrative of someone who is learning how to engage with his character for the first time and almost, like, retconning more connection between Belkar and his non-combat class features as the metaphorical Player becomes more invested in using them.

And it’s just… pretty interesting, in a stage where OOTS is really moving away from meta-D&D jokes - that the most meta-D&D part of the comic is the pretty-serious character arc of one of the main party members

And, I dunno…

[imasoftieforbarb]

Can i suggest a JD x gn reader who is a techno troll, they are both very loud and a bit chaotic?

Sort of a frenemy to lovers thing maybe?

And when the reader finds out he was in a band they just start jamming out together all the time, and the reader does EDM remixes of the songs :D?

-Jerry

JD x GN! Techno Troll reader

Ok I wanna say y’all met when he was fishing

(If he could, he’d wear the ‘women fear me fish love me’ hat you cannot convince me otherwise)

Maybe he was playing his music too loud for your liking?

And you had enough

So you pull your upper half out of the water tall his foot (much to his terror) and say

“Can you turn that down?”

“What?”

“That.”

He operates at the level of petty I do so obviously he turns it up louder

Y’all have a competition of “who can annoy who more”

That’s how you fell for eachother

Just one day he started playing careless whisper and you were so whipped you definitely said yes when he asked you out

Lots of lakeside picnics, benefits for you and him

Techno trolls live in lil communities or big ones so you end up introducing him to your family pretty early on

When he introduces you to his music you’re like-

“Hold up- lemme show you something”

You come back and whip out a EDM remix you made from a brozone record that fell into the lake

And he’s lik

“Oh? Oh shit- my soulmate?!”

He’s whipped

So so whipped

There’s so many photos of memories that y’all have had in his van

He likes to move around but he always comes and visits you

One day he asks if you wanna come with

Aka move in with him

And you have to say yes without hesitation

It’s required by law!

(I’m gonna do a van life with JD soon!)

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Hi wtf!! That rude anon was not me, this is my blog. I created it and then had some problems with verification so I couldn’t send anything. (I only had my main😭) I’m sorry, we can tots cook together now🫶

Anyway, as for robot!König making you squirt, there are no questions asked. Rusty old robot doesn’t even know what the hell he just did. And omg yes your way to make him respond was exactly what i had in mind. He obviously knows what squirting is, because he’s so perverted, but he’s never seen it in real life - outside of the countless porn he’s downloaded.

He likes watching your face, eyes practically staring into your soul. He watches your mouth pout and listens to the little ah ah ah sounds you make, as your hands grip his strong shoulders.

He’s caging you in with one arm, forearm laid next to your face, and the other is gripping your thighs - angling your leg in a way as to encourage you to wrap it around his waist. His hands slide down to your ass ever now and then. Perhaps it’ll be a squeeze, maybe a slap or they’ll continue their journey until he’s reached your clit. He rubs and rubs and squeezes your poor little clit between his harsh fingers.

He mirrors your moans, seemingly unaware of the sounds he lets out in response to your own. And he finally breaks eye contact when he feels you starting to clench on him, “gonna cum..? Hm..?” He almost says nonchalantly. You find it unfair, how he’s not even half as affected by the fucking session. His eyes dart back up to yours when you don’t answer, and he turns on a low level vibration to which you immediately respond with “y-yes!” to. He hums, and turns up the vibration.

The thread snaps and you’re closing your eyes, gasping for air. He always tells you to keep your eyes on him, but this time… he’s not saying anything. He’s not even fucking your, the vibrating dick ongoing and prolonging your high, though. When you finally come home, eyes watering and throat dry, you quietly look at König to meet his eyes. He’s pulled back, sitting on his knees, and keeping your thighs open for him. He’s not looking at you, though, but down at the mess you made. You can’t even excuse yourself because you’ve ‘never done this before’ and you’re ‘so so sorry’ because he tilts his head to the side and lets out a short breath of air.

“Interesting.”

And he starts his painful rubbing on your clit again, grinning horribly at your yelp.

Yay!!! If trolling anon made you start your own writing blog to let us enjoy your Köni thoughts then I'd say we won :D Definitely waiting for what you come up with next! ❤️💋❤️

As for robot!König, can I just say I love how unemotional but piercingly intense he seems?? I mean they must have programmed some emotional responses into him, but you can never tell how organic they are. Is he curious in the way that artificial intelligence is, or is he actually developing feelings for you...? Is it all just electrical impulses or is there some form of human consciousness somewhere in there too?

Because one day he brings you a kitten, says it’s a gift but he gives it to you inside a grocery bag – he’s heard humans and especially women like pets, but he doesn’t understand the concept of giving gifts... So he just hands it to you like that, and when you look inside the plastic bag there’s this shaky little creature inside, meowing at you in minor shock.

Other times brings you “souvenirs” from war, and you never know if you’re going to get chocolate, cigarettes, pantyhose or a human skull :/ And he has at least some sort of self awareness and pride because he likes his new reputation as not only a killing machine, but a fucking machine as well. The container that serves as your home is echoing with your moans and mewls as he fucks you so of course everyone knows how good he is.

You always wonder if he's boasting to his comrades about the things he does to you, but then there are times when he looks almost tender while sitting on the old wooden bench, watching how you play with the kitten he brought you. Lets you put the cat on his shoulder so that it perches there small, wiggly and cute, on the slippery metal plate of his armor he never takes off.

You tell yourself it's affection, not curiosity, that makes his turn his head... It must be, a genuine attempt to seek connection when he slowly, gently, extends a gloved hand and lets the kitten shyly sniff at his finger, then rub her scent on it...

[rocksibblingsau]

what are some of your headcannons for funk branch?

He was only just learning wiring/mechanics so he took some time to catch up to Funk science levels of advancements, but people were VERY encouraging of his progress.

He felt very out of place for a while (as much as Techno Branch) due to how Funk/Techno are visibly the most different to him.

Vibe City was very disorienting to him because there was 0 nature. Even the lowest point of the ship was still part of a ship. The escape bubbles didn't feel safe enough for him, so Essence and Quincy had a special escape pod built special for him for going off the ship/in case of an emergency.

Quincy and Essence were very horrified to learn of the Bergens, and felt some guilt as with their technology it would have been relatively easy to rescue Pop had they have known. Branch feels a little upset to learn that years of suffering could have been fixed by a device made in a single day, but accepts that it wasn't their fault. Quincy and Essence resolve to keep tabs on Pop just in case.

Branch likes Quincy's dad jokes, and getting kisses from Essence, but pretends to be Too Cool for them.

Personally I believe the gold/silver fringe is jewelry/clothing, so I like the idea Branch gets a fringe necklace like his family. Maybe at one point wore a fringe dress-like clothing that gave him a similar silhouette (minus the neck) as a bipedal Funk Troll. I also think he switches between glass like his dad and a gold hat similar to an old concept of Prince D (his appearance in some of the toy lines).

He's too short for a lot of things so when they get closer, Prince D lets Branch stand on his back for stuff.

He's worn a boa like Lownote's. It made him feel very fancy.

He likes disco music. [Further information redacted]

He goes by Prince B in the future, but some people say B for short, which ends up getting confusing when Blues is around. For many years before he accepted the 'Prince' title he was just B, so some people started saying Big B and Lil B.

R and B are called the 'Funk Sisters' and they dubbed Branch and D the 'Funk Brothers'. Branch doesn't get the title because surely there are TONS of siblings in Vibe City so why do THEY get the title?

[eisforeidolon]

I'M PISSED OFF BY MISHA'S ATTITUDE AND LIES TOWARDS JARED!

HE'S GONE TOO FAR. SAYING THAT THING ABOUT JARED AND PLAYING THE VICTIM WHEN HE IS ACTUALLY JUST A LYING NARCISSIST. I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW PEOPLE CAN STILL SUPPORT HIM AND BELIEVE IN WHATEVER HE SAYS.

JARED SHOULD REALLY SUE HIM AT THIS POINT FOR WHAT HE'S SAYING ABOUT HIM.

You know, I was trying to remember yesterday just how many times it's been now where Misha has surpassed himself in being a bitter, gross, ungrateful and jealous little troll to the point it astonished me. Like, did he really say that?!? Wow.

Like, it started out with the occasional sly imprecation and it seems like the more irrelevant he becomes and the more he's gotten away with? The more emboldened he's gotten to just tell more and more blatantly ridiculous and even potentially harmful lies. I kind of feel like at this point, until he openly says something so absolutely, undeniably putrid that J2 find out and cut him off, it really is going to keep escalating indefinitely.

I mean, I honestly find the fans letting him get away with it less baffling than him doing it in the first place. Because we've already seen that in their desperation to pretend getting canon D/C is the most important cause ever in LGBT+ history, they will believe anyone who tells them what they want to hear and try to throw anyone who they see as "in the way" under the bus. So, yeah, Misha could bitchslap their grandma and run over their dog and they'd still live up his ass. Talking any level of shit about Jared is a-okay with them, because they already want to believe he's evil for Sam existing at the center of SPN instead of their shitty ship. Not only that? But at the end of the day, they really have nothing to lose. Their wackadoodle online behavior isn't likely to have any impact on their IRL lives, and even in terms of online lives? For the most part, they could slink away from their batshit heller identities tomorrow and have a clean slate.

Misha though? Like, what the actual fuck are you doing, dude, you're not just burning real life personal and professional bridges, you're trying to nuke them from orbit. Sure, he's not getting any new roles because anyone in the business of hiring can see the caliber of his "acting talent" in the last several seasons of SPN. But is he really that confident he thinks no level of backstabbing is going to get his ass booted from conventions and any potential revival? Can he actually be stupid enough to have bought so far into the smoke his stans are blowing up his ass to think that he's actually as indispensable as J2? One line about how Cass is busy in heaven and boom, he's acceptably accounted for to the majority of the GA.

Even the nicest, most forgiving person in the universe is going to eventually say enough is enough. Basically accusing Jared of endangering his life to try and make his own actions of flushing Jared's phone look less shitty by comparison is ... I don't have words. How much lower can he even go? Unfortunately, I suspect we'll continue to find out.

[chirpycloudyrobin]

"Saving one person is child's play. Saving the world is as hard as reaching the Heavens."

Do I press forward? Or run away?

"... back when he made the decision, he fully understood the situations that he had to face."

...although he thought that his heart was like a stone, in the end, he was still human, not some emotionless grass or plant.

In which I make connections between MDZS' Wei Wuxian and Honkai Star Rail's Jiaoqiu solely because both are pretty much my blorbos. I'll start off with the easiest connections and I will inevitably end up making the longest of reaches so come along for the ride ! :D

Contains spoilers ahead for both Mo Dao Zu Shi and Honkai Star Rail ~ Be warned :3

The quickest and easiest connections are the most surface-level ones. Both characters are attributed with the colour red (or shades/variants of), foxes, and spice.

Jiaoqiu is a Foxian, an in-game humanoid species with vulpine (fox-like) features, Wei Wuxian has been connected with foxes by the fanbase (see: popular fox!Xian and dragon!Ji type fanfics)

Both characters favour spicy dishes, so spicy that no other person could withstand their spice tolerance. For Wei Wuxian, canonically it's because he grew up eating spicy dishes. For Jiaoqiu, trauma numbed his sense of taste and only the spiciest dishes could make him feel alive for the first time (see: Jiaoqiu Character Story III)

Jiaoqiu's in-game abilities' aesthetic is also based heavily around the Yuanyang Hotpot, where the hotpot resembles the yinyang symbol and one of the broths involved is a spicy broth.

Their character designs feature the colour red as a significant colour. (Jiaoqiu's in-game abilities, top, fan, and phone case; Wei Wuxian's hair ribbons and clothing accents [and his powers in the donghua])

Yes, I do completely admit that my brain went "omg jiaoqiu = wwx" when I saw that Jiaoqiu was a fox connected to red and spices. What can you do?

For a while, the connection stayed that way: Surface-level and with a bit of reach. But now Jiaoqiu has been released, we can see his Character Stories, and we've seen him in action in-game !

Our Foxes and their Wish to Help

The biggest and most important shared character trait they have is their dedication to helping/saving other people. Some people call this a "saviour or hero complex" in regards to Wei Wuxian, but that's just not what it is. I'll explain.

This lifelong dedication is not something you can immediately see at first glance. Both Wei Wuxian and Jiaoqiu look and feel like the archetypal trickster character with their pleasant smiles, natural charisma, and that vague sense of 'hey maybe this guy may have something planned but we don't know what'. Wei Wuxian is definitely seen by others as a lax troublemaker, while Jiaoqiu has been described in his introductory blurb as "greeting people with a smile on his face and a scheme in his heart".

They're both devious little trolls ! In the Primaveral Swordsage Event, Jiaoqiu literally slipped laxatives to IPC workers so March 7th can win and if that isn't the most Wei Wuxian thing ever then I don't know what is.

But as you go through their stories, you realise that beneath all that is a soul who just really wants to help people. Jiaoqiu walked a different path from his Alchemy Commission family to become a combat medic because "it is ultimately not compatible with my wish to practice medicine for the masses" (Character Story I). Wei Wuxian risked his already shaky position in the gentry to save the Wen Remnants who have been condemned by the rest of their society.

Both are also well-acquainted with the phrase "no good deed goes unpunished".

Jiaoqiu watched so many of his patients walk directly back to their death after saving them that he literally had to quit practicing medicine. Each death whittled away at his heart piece by piece until he was left questioning his purpose as a healer.

Wei Wuxian stuck with his decision to help the Wens until the very end. He died reviled by the Cultivation World and people still curse his name over a decade after his death. The very people he risked it all for are also gone, save for two.

The tragedy of their lives are intrinsically connected with their entirely selfless desire to help others, especially since they both have the skills to do so and, in Wei Wuxian's case, because no one else wanted to do so.

The difference between the two of them is how they coped after their respective tragedies. Jiaoqiu ended up pretty jaded by the war he went through and quit practicing medicine. In his words, "Those I saved only ended up as another dead soul when they dived head-in back into the battlefield." His retirement doesn't last long though. He was then approached to become his General's healer and he accepted. Despite it all, he still wants to help. His heart is terribly broken, but even it couldn't squash his innate wish to help and heal.

Meanwhile, Wei Wuxian is introduced and he immediately jumps into saving a couple of strangers. A couple of teens, because he had the assets to do so and because no one else was around who could. And he continues to help even after the contract that brought him back was fulfilled because he can and he wanted to. He went out of his way to help those who he thought hated and condemned him because that's just who he is.

They don't go around helping people because they want to be the hero. They aren't looking for any kind of glory or prize for all their efforts. They just happen to be people who want to contribute to the betterment of the world. They both feel that they do this best by helping where they can. They're not reckless or neglectful of themselves. Jiaoqiu left when it became too much for him, Wei Wuxian exhausts all possible avenues first before he goes for the last resort. Their perceived mistakes and losses weigh down on them by the time the audience meets them.

This dedication is their biggest asset and at some point became their worst detriment. Wei Wuxian's story is finished and we know it ends in a hopeful note despite all the losses and heartbreaking revelations. Jiaoqiu's story is still ongoing and I can only hope that my boy gets the happy ending he deserves :(

Smaller Connections

Jiaoqiu and Wei Wuxian have a few more traits they share !

They're both good with kids ! Wei Wuxian is pretty fond of the juniors and they are very fond of him right back. Jiaoqiu's interactions with the younger characters are soft and cute, and they fuss over him as much as he fusses over them !

They're both inventive lil dudes ! Wei Wuxian's inventions have improved the quality of night hunts by the time he is summoned into Mo Xuanyu's body. Jiaoqiu has been mentioned to continuously improve upon his family's medicinal formula while in the midst of war and his medicines have been described to be "unusual but profoundly effective". His Character Story I has an old man say "Others can hardly even invent a few decent medicines in their lifetimes, yet a single day is all you need to achieve that and more." in regards to his medicines

They both don't like plain foods because they're "boring". Though Jiaoqiu's may just be a side effect of his diminished sense of taste from trauma.

BONUS: They both have a quieter companion who are perceived by others as "cold and distant" and are known to be particularly clean and tidy.

So, that's it ! :D This is literally me peddling my WWX-IS-JIAOQIU-AND-VICE-VERSA agenda for funsies ~

[sevencolorsatlast]

Reverse Isekai SAGAU - Your Favorite Character Misses You (Part 1)

Part 1 (You're Here!) || Part 2

Edit 1: Added more headcanons! I've missed some details I had on mind ;w;

This wholesome idea came up out of nowhere after reading a bunch of Imposter SAGAU reverse isekais whereas a bunch of characters yeet themselves into the Creator's/Player's world to apologize for killing them at the first place.

What if, by chance, they ended up in your world while you were away for a very long time? Not really you being an Imposter or anything; it’s like the game telling you “Remember your favorite character you often play as? They actually miss you a lot. I’m gonna send them to you pronto!” then they just appear out of nowhere and scare the living shit out of you as they land in your house.

Other Notes: Default SAGAU / GN!Reader / Headcanon / +400 Words

Due to the sudden teleportation, they usually have items on their hands (an open book, a pen, a musical instrument or even their weapon) or look like they are going to who-knows-where, frozen in mid-walk/mid-run. 

It’ll take them a while to get them accustomed to the modern world. Now, there will be a lot of room for creativity here!

Examples: they call you "Your Grace/Your Excellency, etc." and you keep correcting them to call you by your name because you know people will give you weird looks if you and your fave are in public; teaching them what an internet meme is; they can practically borrow your/your old relatives' clothes (if it fits them) or outright steals from someone else if they are cunning enough that can get you into trouble; asking what are the names moving vehicles and you can (1) tell them what they are called (2) troll them by calling it something ridiculous and they repeat after you with a puzzled look on their faces. Be creative! :D

(forgot to add this detail oops) Depending on how high your friendship level is with your fave. If it's between Level 1-5, they are powerless as heck but will help you whenever they can.

But if you have Level 6-10 Friendship, they can summon their weapon out of thin air to protect you even if they don't have their Vision powers with them.

Poor Catalysts users. Depending on who they are: throw their weapon at someone's face as distraction / use their martial prowess (aka beating the living daylights out of a person) / use their galaxy brain intelligence to get you both out of trouble / grab your hand to run as far away as possible to get you to safety.

However, their stats/artifacts are still on effect so imagine your fave getting into a fight and won the 50-50 Crit Rate/DMG with their hit / whatever weapon they are using.

When you finally open the game, you see an empty space in your roster/character menu but displays their name and everything like before - their artifacts you gave them, same weapons and talent levels too. 

For them to get back, this is silly but very wholesome - you need to make their favorite/specialty dishes and they eat it. Simple, right? Probably yes for some characters, probably no with most… as you tried to rack your brains on how to even properly cook, replicate the look/design, AND how it tastes.

Wait, have you ever tasted similar dishes to theirs beforehand? And what if you have allergies to a certain ingredient? They will/can help you but where on earth would you find that one ingredient exclusive to a certain store? 

Also, good luck not setting your kitchen on fire because I assume all of them haven’t seen a modern kitchen before.

Once you miraculously successfully replicated their dish in real life, they can go back to their world and you can play as them in the game as usual. They can basically go back and forth by making their specialty dish and offering it to your shrine whenever they want to see you again.

[maryellencarter]

Andy Serkis, of course, as *the* expert in motion-capture acting ever since he first played Gollum 20+ years ago, is a shapeshifter in ways beyond even most character actors to achieve.

He's also a high-level shapeshifter by normal character actor methods -- when I saw him in Black Panther (I think possibly the only place I've seen him wearing his own face, me not being a great moviegoer at the best of times), there was only one brief moment where an expression that reminded me of Gollum flickered through.

Recently, it turned out that a free trial of Amazon Prime which I happened to have running could be converted into a second free book credit on Audible if I should take a free trial there. I've been curious for some time about the 2021 audiobook of LOTR performed by Andy Serkis, and while trying to get my sleep schedule right way up for job-hunting purposes, I've been working on listening to his Fellowship of the Ring. (I've just reached Moria.)

It's a straight-up audiobook, not a play, by the technical definition: one performer, no music or added special effects. But *damn*, you want to talk about shapeshifting? Serkis does startlingly accurate impressions of every actor in the Peter Jackson movies, plus unique voices for characters with no movie casting, and he sings the songs that are described as having tunes.

(I don't have the ear to tell whether he's using new compositions or some kind of traditional tunes, except that I can say for certain he doesn't use Tolkien's rendition of "A fox went out on a winter's night" for Sam's "Troll Song". If anyone with a better ear than mine happens to investigate, I'd be delighted to know what's discovered.)

His narratorial voice isn't 100% Jirt, which is a Choice, but one I honestly support. The Professor had a thick Old English accent which would probably be a chore to listen to or perform for 60+ hours of total audiobook length. Serkis seems to be using something close to his natural Middlesex accent for the narration, as far as I can tell, but there are enough of the familiar Tolkienian twists (like using the "o" sound from the word "tossed" in "shone" and "wroth") that I'm favorably impressed so far.

His Elvish pronunciation isn't perfect, but it's solidly movie-quality (positive); you'd likely have to be me, with a quarter-century and counting of Sindarin as a second language, to snag on the tiny things I'm snagging on, stuff like the Finnish-style double-length "m" in Remmirath or the "eth" sound represented by the "dh" in Caradhras. (There is properly no D sound in Caradhras; the middle consonant sound should be that of the "th" in "these clothes", but I've never actually heard anyone besides myself say it that way.) He gets a lot of the tricky sounds correct, better than I do when I'm being sloppy, like the long-i-adjacent diphthong in Edain or the broad second A in Gandalf.

Also, the unique voices and the vocal effects he brings in for certain scenes are just... I don't even have words. The Barrow-Wight is as terrifying as it was when I was ten. Tom Bombadil sings about 95% of his dialogue, which I've never imagined any performance acknowledging unless it were the hypothetical LOTR opera I suggest every so often, but goddamn if he doesn't somehow make it work. For the movie-cast voices, he flips so smoothly between the mishmash of accents that I keep forgetting I'm not actually listening to a full-cast play with Billy Boyd's chirpy Glaswegian, Sean Bean's gruff Yorkshire, and Sean Astin's earnest put-on West Country all complete.

As for the lowest bar, the reason I refuse to recommend Rob Inglis's older unabridged audiobooks as an entry point -- Inglis regularly inserts contractions that aren't in the original text, turning the formal tone of scenes where "cannot" and "will not" are important signifiers into something incongruously conversational. I do not forgive that kind of alteration in a text where the formality level, and the changes between levels, are such an incredibly fundamental part of what's being conveyed. Serkis has already successfully cleared one dialogue point where it would have been easy to change "can not" to "can't" (Pippin talking nearly as fast as hobbitly possible), and I'm very optimistic that he'll continue to hit those marks.

Wow, that got longer than I expected, but I'm *really* enjoying this rendition. Unless it majorly blows up in my face somehow, I fully expect to have a new go-to recommendation for How To Experience LOTR for people who can't get through it by reading the text. (And even for people who can. I've said on many occasions, that book is written to be read aloud.)

[ewesless]

💨💀 Headcanons!

@5mary5

Okay so this is my dirty secret forbidden crack. Here there be talk about bad gas out the ass (I can't find that legendary tumblr post, but if I do I will edit this post.) Edit: As promised! No wonder I couldn't find it :( I bless old chats, thank you old chats.

Mine will be the opposite with the characters breaking the taboo with MC!

MC: Somehow they have never done this in front of anyone. Is it magic? Superhuman levels of self control? Nay, it's because they are a sheep plushie. Laughs at farts because they are pretty immature and like crude humor. So this will be their reaction!

Lucifer: Only in the sanctuary of the bathroom, but he does alone in his room or office. He has the tightest control and the stick up in there helps a bit. Even dead asleep he has ironclad hold over his sphincter. Mammon and the Anti-Lucifer League have tried to cause him to with gas causing food and drinks, but even curses, spells and hexes failed. Does he even fart or is that why he's so cranky all the time? Scolds MC for being immature and regularly chews out his brothers for being vulgar. Strings anyone up by the heels who would have the audacity to fart in front of Diavolo because it makes Diavolo lol and Barbatos looks at him like he's commit a heinous offense.

Mammon: Will hold someone down and fart on them, aka his brothers, by that I mean Levi. He would be embarrassed for letting one slip in front of MC, but when he finds out it makes them laugh and they're okay with it he's relaxes and won't worry about letting them out. Intentionally low pressure ones though and tries to be quiet about it. Will tap Luke someone else on the shoulder and say, "Guess what?" And then fart!! He fooled Luke and Little D. no. 2 with the "pull my finger" trick.

Leviathan: Rancid, third stinkiest because of his food choices and because he will hold his bowels during binge sessions and speed runs. His headphones have advanced noise cancelling now because he was having a gas attack from anxiety during an game night against MC, Diavolo and Barbatos (Because Barbatos was curbstomping him) so all of a sudden he is gifted these fancy headphones??? He doesn't connect the dots because he thought his old pair had good cancelling. When MC is hanging out with him he'll apologize only if they're audible or noticeably stinky. He thought the reason MC was laughing their ass off that fateful game night because he was so funny...

Satan: Third stinkiest. He's accustomed to being alone in his room so when he's reading in the library and wants to be left alone he will rip ass. It smells like a litter box in his room sometimes, but he blames it on Mammon's cooking rather than the cats he is able to smuggle in. He doesn't fart intentionally in front of MC, but he isn't bothered by it when he does because it's a normal bodily function so wht would he be? That's illogical.

Asmodeus: you would not catch him DEAD. He gets an upset stomach occasionally from fad dieting so he takes stomach medicine when he does, but he's an "exclusively in the bathroom" type. He will whenever he's alone though, but he resents it. He thinks his gas smells the least offensive and he's right!

Beelzebub: The stinkiest of stinkies. They have power behind them too, like gale force hurricanes (not really, but you could swear it) when he has eaten certain food. He does not hold back but he does apologize when he belches and farts.

Belphegor: Second stinkiest, silent but deadlies. No apologies, no remorse because he's lazy and his rear is just as lazy and it's a natural bodily function. He uses them to troll his brothers too, but he always gets a particular smirk when he does and they are a creeping death so if someone is observant or wary enough (like Lucifer) they will escape the room.

Diavolo: He got caught off guard by one in front of MC once and it snuck past his defenses unhindered. He almost died from embarrassment and MC almost died from trying not to laugh about it. After that he was profusely apologetic, but MC told him it was fine as they laughed and soon Diavolo was laughing with them. He's always extremely polite and socially graceful about even a stomach gurgle because he has an image (and a Barbatos who is always protecting and enforcing that image) he has trained himself to have an incredible ability to hold them in. (The chat where he had the leg cramp supports this) So when he catches a moment between public appearances or meetings to escape to the bathroom he has to make the most of the opportunity. He farts for funnies in front of Lucifer when they've been drinking because one time he did and Lucifer was so aghast by his gas that he let out a scoff-laugh of disbelief and amusement that the Devildom Prince just did that. Diavolo is hellbent on hearing that cute reaction again and uses it at unexpected moments like a ninja flashbang. With MC he feels like he doesn't have to feel the pressure to be seen as perfect and occasional fartiness (usually when Barbatos is on a kick with certain foods) is just part of him that he can be himself without fear of judgement with them about.

Barbatos: My MC would be in a long term battle of wills against anyone, but particularly Barbatos. They will not fart. He will not fart. No one has given ground in the ?(?) years they have known each other. The reason why? One time he passed gas in front of them and was so ashamed because of looking anything less than completely perfect, flawless and in control that he edited the timeline. He will go so far as to summon portals and step into pocket dimensions to fart.

Luke: Holds them and excuses himself to the bathroom because he's a polite and well mannered boy (in some ways...) and it would reflect negatively on Michael and Simeon for him to do that. If he tooted (his words) in front of MC he would be upset about being gross or uncool in front of them, but MC would reassure him everyone does and that it was kinda funny though, wasn't it? Well ;n; I guess it kinda was... never again.

Simeon: He doesn't exactly hold them back, but he doesn't exactly let them out either. These situations do call for discretion, but he gives it away even if it was overlooked because he laughs a little and apologizes every time. In front of MC it makes him embarrassed, but when he realizes they make MC laugh he's more inclined to be relaxed and might do it for funnies.

Solomon: He has a category of his own. His food may not affect him, but it does affect the smell of his farts. At PH his room smells like absolute rotten ass unless Simeon rushes and airs it out whenever Solomon leaves it because he keeps the door shut and locked and often stays in their a whole day or more. Like Leviathan he'll be busy or distracted and in flow state with his research and magic and not use the bathroom. He can go in the woods no difficulty because he has magic to assist (not like HP wizards though. The man has sensibilities and couth.) He knew MC laughs at farts by observing their reactions to others so sometimes he'll say, "Hey MC." to get their attention and then rip one and laugh with them. During routine inspections of Cocytus Hall Barbatos actually casts a spell on his nose and mouth because of the foul and despicable sham of a sorcerer's fecal particles saturate the air.

Raphael: Because he eats a variety of foods but also regularly eats Solomon's food his are a subcategory of Solomon's. He does not make an expression or reaction and noone else does either because even his farts convey threat and the danger of his rain of spears.

Mephistopheles: When he was a young Demon he was even more anxious about looking good in front of Diavolo and impressing him. He did fart in front of him once and was so mortified that he vowed to never do something so disgraceful again. Will not ever fart in front of MC.

Thirteen: THIS IS THE REASON SHE HATES SOLOMON SO MUCH. She got a severe upset stomach from his food and actually thought about 100 new death traps to murder him with. That was the only reason she didn't kill him on the spot bacause the silver lining was those 100 traps! She would sooner hide out until the extinction of all life before she would pass gas in front of MC or anyone. The number one and only who adheres to the in the bathroom!!!

These are inspired by real life! Especially Mammon and Solomon.

[arikihalloween]

Wakfu art dump because yes

This post is gonna be super long because I will ramble IN DEPTH today

So huh if you like my rambling or my art just read ig, otherwise scroll away idk what to tell ya

Showing some of my art and ramble because wakfu is part of my current big 3 hyperfixations ( along with WH and Trolls )

So huh enjoy my growing insanity ( I compiled it in one post to not annoy people too much :')

Presenting my oc Sharm !

An (very pink) Eliotrope

She's based on my in game character but I kinda gave her lore and a story so

⭐INFODUMP about Wakfu in general ! ⭐

Basic infos for those who don't know anything about Wakfu :

Wakfu is a french animated serie made by the studio Ankama, who also made several mmorpg games ( and way more, like the amount of content and lore is crazy)

Most of the stories will take place on the World of Twelves, populated by 12 main races (with many variation)

And there is a 13th "main race", the Eliatropes, which is the race of the main character of the anime, Yugo

Eliotropes ( with a o instead of a) are a subrace of the Eliatropes ( lore is explained in the serie but I don't wanna spoil, so to boil it down, Eliotropes are unstable pale copies of eliatropes) [ they are playable in the game wakfu]

So, what about Sharm ? Well she was born a pretty regular Eliotrope. She had two "brothers", Chance and Vitali, who unfortunately ended up fading away with time ( mechanically, when an Eliotrope die, his/her essence will go to the nearest Eliotrope to allow them to live longer)

So Sharm was left alone for very long, and stayed in Eliatropes ruins she found. Those were overgrown by stasis ( type of crystals, very bad, generally associated with corruption and destruction)

However, the essence she got from her siblings passing could only last so long

One day, in a desperate attempt to not die, Sharm took stasis and...ate it. Chewed on the mf crystals, and surprisingly, an interesting reaction occured : it stabilised her essence. It also made her basically frozen in development, Sharm cannot grow anymore and her power levels are quite limited in quantity, unless she uses stasis.

So my girl went through the ages, she kept on researching on the remnant of the eliatrope race ( wiped out aside from a few) and became sort of an archeologist

Nowadays, Sharm travels from a country/city to an other, often with mercenaries she hires as bodyguards . The other two ocs in this sketch page are the said mercenaries

And the cat is called Noiraude !

Sharm needs protection because she is stupidly useless in combat

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

And also I have fanarts of Nora !

And also, it's time for the gremlin mode

The worst of the ramble

I kinda just need to scream for a moment

Beware, big spoilers for the serie ahead ! Stop now and go watch Wakfu !! It's all on Netflix ( season 1, season 2, then the 3 oav, THEN season 3 and you will be ready for season 4 :D)

So, this character is Nora (second drawing is a headcanon version of her)

Who is Nora ? She is the sixth eliatrope of the Council ( Eliatropes are rules by the six first borns of the race who can reincarnate along with their dragon twin)

Nora appeared for the first time in a flashback the episode "Quilbi" in season 2

In 2011

And back then she was in a flashback, so presumed dead from the war that wiped out the Eliatropes

BUT

Lately, as clips and trailers of season 4 of Wakfu has been released

It's confirmed that Nora is there

She's alive

She's in season 4

*grabs u*

2011

She has been my favorite character of Wakfu since her one and only appearance, alright ?

And now

12-13 years later

She is real

SHE IS REAL AND ALIVE IN THE SERIE

*maniacal laughter*

I will not shut up about it

Prepare for the fanarts

*retreats to the shadows*