#junseok angst
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mgnifiqueyoo · 4 months ago
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"Let me be the water that embraces you, a beautiful flower. A water lily. So that no storm can ever hurt you as it isn’t my heart’s choice."
───── ❝ summary ❞ ─────
‘ It's still me… but different. ‘
As everybody says, grief is the price we pay for love… and Y/N L/N could surely see herself believing it. After losing her best friend on his birthday, the poor girl knew to herself that his death was her wrongdoing. A mistake she could never forget.
But the moment she attempts to start over, she sees him again.
Junseok Oh. Resurrected from the dead.
⊱ ────── {.⋅ chapters ⋅.} ────── ⊰
act i: mia nea apxh | ΕΠΙΣΤΡΟΦΗ. | ΕΝΑΣ ΞΕΝΟΣ | ΚΟΡΟΪΔΙΑ | ΤΟ ΑΠΡΟΣΜΕΝΟ. | ΞΕΡΑΜΕΝΑ ΦΥΛΛΑ. | ΜΑΥΡΟ ΦΟΡΕΜΑ. | ΣΚΙΩΜΕΝΑ ΜΥΣΤΗΡΙΑ. | Η ΑΛΗΘΕΙΑ. act ii: ΝΥΚΤΕΡΙΝΟΣ. | ΜΙΑ ΠΑΡΩΔΙΑ. | ΠΑΡΕΞΗΓΩ. | ΤΟ ΣΥΜΒΟΥΛΙΟ. | ΤΟ ΨΕΜΑ. | ΑΝΕΣΗ. act iii:
⊱ ─────────────────────── ⊰
genre/s: angst, fluff, action, supernatural, adventure
main theme/s: enemies to lovers, best friends to lovers, heroism
status: ongoing
idols & group/s included: atbo members, seok rakwon (written prior his departure), jay b of got7/soloist, majority of the boyz (lee juyeon, kim younghoon, lee sangyeon, kim sunwoo, choi chanhee, kim sunwoo)
⊱ ─────────────────────── ⊰
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— support me on ko-fi! ☕ — request form! 📝
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ssongsboo · 1 year ago
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- masterlist -
─────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───────────
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⋆ smut // 𖦹 angst // ⭒ suggestive
⟢ younite
⋆ steve eating you out
⋆ eunsang eating you out
𖦹 hyungseok x bulletproof [lyran dasz]
⋆ giving hyungseok head
⋆ breeding and degradation w steve
⋆ phone sex w steve
⭒ vampire!steve
⭒ stoner!dey
⋆ exes to fwb w hyungseok
⋆ overstimulation w hyungseok
⭒ sugar daddy!dey
⭒ kissing shy steve
⋆ steve eating you out on movie night
⭒ handcuffing steve
⭒ eunho turning fantasies into confessions
⋆ steve using a vibrator on you
⋆ dey w a strength kink
⋆ dealer!eunsang
⋆ dry humping w kyungmun
⋆ slight somno w hyungseok
⋆ spanking w steve
𖦹 hyungseok x merry go [dpr ian]
⋆ cat hybrid!reader cockwarming steve
⋆ hyungseok spitting in your mouth
⭒ camboy!dey
⋆ crybaby!dey
⋆ bday kisses w steve
⋆ puppy!sion
𖦹 hyungseok x für mich da [lyran dasz]
⟢ atbo
⭒ enemies to lovers w junseok
⋆ high sex w junseok
⭒ enemies to lovers w hyunjun
⋆ threesome w junseok & seunghwan
⭒ prof!junseok [proposal] // ⋆ [reward]
⟢ blitzers
⋆ gunplay w juhan
⋆ juhan eating you out
⋆ beach sex w juhan
⟢ misc
⭒ joker!gunwook
⋆ seongmo eating pussy
⭒ fashion designer!jay
⋆ big dick!jay
⋆ overstimulating junseo
⋆ euijoo fingering you
⭒ thighriding w junseo
⋆ shower sex w &team legal line
⋆ personal trainer!yunhyeok
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apcomplexhq · 2 years ago
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✦ Nome do personagem: Seo Yubin ✦ Faceclaim e função: Junseok - ATBO ✦ Data de nascimento: 03/03/2003 ✦ Idade: 20 anos ✦ Gênero e pronomes: Masculino / Ele dele ✦ Nacionalidade e etnia: Coreia do Sul, coreana. ✦ Qualidades: Determinado, Criativo, e Leal ✦ Defeitos: Irresponsável, Teimoso, e Preguiçoso ✦ Moradia: Asphodel Meadows ✦ Ocupação: Curso de Dança e Banhista e Tosador na Pegasus Wings ✦ Twitter: @AM03SY ✦ Preferência de plot: ANGST, CRACK, HOSTILITY, ROMANCE, SMUT ✦ Char como condômino: Yubin é o vizinho extrovertido, que facilmente faz amizade e agrada as pessoas, algumas vezes com presentinhos, muitas das vezes para poder se safar de alguma bagunça ou uma "festinha" fora de hora no seu apartamento.
TW’s na bio: Menção em uso de substancias ilícitas
Biografia:
Nascido e criado em uma família com um bom poder aquisitivo, Yubin é o filho mais novo de Seo Kangjoon um famoso lutador de MMA, no momento vivendo uma “aposentadoria” suas aparições nada mais é que publicidade, e sua mãe Park Sora uma modelo que ainda mantinha seu nome nos holofotes, mesmo depois de ter passado muito tempo focada na criação de seus filhos.
Tal criação que foi regrada em uma certa liberdade entre eles, querendo ou não isso meio que influenciou em sua personalidade, é um pouco egocentrico, gosta de curtir e festejar, sair pra beber e usar certas coisinhas ilicitas.
Os dois filhos tiveram a mesma criação com os mesmos direitos, seus pais sempre exploravam suas individualidades, e por influencia de seu pai, o esporte sempre foi presente na vida deles, mas Yubin sempre se interessou mais por outras coisas, deixando seu irmão ficar com esse cargo.
Seu irmão mais velho era o total oposto, Yubin sempre curtiu essa atenção, gostava da ideia de ser “famoso” e aproveitar as oportunidades, e o mesmo não era timido coms esses olhares, então não foi uma surpresa para sua familia quando o mesmo ingressou em uma companhia de entretenimento, com a intenção de treinar e debutar em um grupo, obtendo sucesso desde sua vida de traine, mas não era muito aquilo oque ele queria, uma vida falsa, uma personalidade nova teria que ser adotada, acabou por optar não seguir isso, Yubin sabe que suas preferencias não são aceitas de forma tão boa pelos outros.
Sempre gostou de curtir e festejar, era muito comum ele fugir e se envolver em alguma confusão, mas sempre tentando ao maximo manter certa descrição a seus pais, que mesmo conhecendo bem o filho que possuiam, ainda tinham uma imagem descente.
Atualmente estava experimentando uma vida nova e independente, morava em Asphodel Meadows, dividia o apartamento com BAE MINHO. Ja frequentou e trabalhou em alguns lugares para se manter, usando seu talento e dando aulas de dança, ja trabalhou em alguns bares, e se juntou com alguns amigos em batalhas undergounds, atualmente trabalhava na Pegasus Wings, o que contrastava total com a vida que gostava de levar, mas isso não lhe incomodava, era uma forma de se distrair.
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acaiasahi · 2 years ago
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atbo.
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reactions.
nothing yet.
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✶ oh junseok.
even cuter ; fluff.
make it thirty ; fluff.
↳ attempting to wake junseok up was, and will always be a struggle. luckily for him, you can never say no to his antics... especially when it includes two things: sleeping in and cuddles.
✶ ryu junmin.
✶ bae hyunjun.
✶ seok rakwon.
life is strange ; fluff. [ coming soon . . . ]
↳ you unveil your time-altering powers to your best friend and he has a lot to say about it... mostly incoherent and garbled noises but he can't help but call 'bullshit'.
✶ jeong seunghwan.
✶ kim yeonkyu.
✶ won bin.
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© acaiasahi 2023 all rights reserved. copying, translating, and reposting is prohibited.
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deadseobwalking · 3 years ago
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MASTERLIST
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last updated may 2023
key: 🧸 4 smut , 🪐 4 angst , 🪬 4 fluff, 🍃 4 requests , 🪄 4 reactions
BTS
J-HOPE — 2:53 am [ 🧸🍃 ]
P1HARMONY
p1h as drugs
kissing p1h
JIUNG — "drive me insane" [ heaven ] 🧸 || "i'll love you better if you let me" [ all mine ] 🧸
JUST B
nipple piercings [ 🪄 ]
ONEWE
CYA — "i fall to pieces when im with you" [ cherry ] 🧸
STRAY KIDS
LEE KNOW — "i just wanna play with your body" [ play with me ] 🧸
NINE.I
VAHN — just call my name like you'll need me [ middle of the night ]🧸
AB6IX
DAEHWI — "that body's dangerous, letting you show it off" [ your guilty pleasure ] 🧸
XDINARY HEROES
JUNHAN — "is that what you want?" [ cherry waves ] 🧸
ENHYPEN
boyfriend!enha [ 🪬🧸 ]
MIRAE
JUNHYUK — "you do damage to me but i love it" [ poison ] 🧸
TREASURE
HARUTO — "you're such a pretty, pretty, pretty face and then you turned into a pretty big waste of time" [ if you can't hang ] 🪐
SOLOISTS
BIG NAUGHTY — donghyun as your boyfriend || drunk donghyun [ 🪄 ]
ATBO
kissing atbo [ 🍃 ]
JUNSEOK — royal treatment [ 🧸 ]
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mrworldwideshoulders · 3 years ago
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The Way You Look Tonight || reader x KNJ
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Pairing: reader x KNJ Word count: 2.5k Rating: M / R Genre: married life au, maybe a little bit of angst, fluff, slice of life Summary: You’re feeling self-conscious about the way you look after years of being married and having kids, so your husband takes it upon himself to reassure you that you’re still the most beautiful woman in his life. Inspired by Just The Way You Are - Bruno Mars (among many similar others). Warnings: don’t get squarshed by the large quantities of fluff; also strong language, discussion of the postpartum body. T/N: aegiya = a Korean term of endearment meaning baby.  A/N: I am truly so soft for husband Joon fluff T_T I could write these married life aus alllll day for real. once again beta’d and bannered by my best pal @onmypillow-onmytable :D hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! ly - robyn P.S. As always I do not own BTS or their likenesses, nor do I own the music of Bruno Mars, lol, they simply inspire me.
inspo playlist here
You stare at yourself in the mirror, sucking your bottom lip in and out. You can’t quite put your finger on why, but this dress doesn’t look right, not even with your doughy stomach crammed into the shaper underneath. Neither did the last one. Or the one before that. Or the first one you tried on, about six dresses ago. Who knew every single cocktail dress you owned looked awful on you? Or that every little black dress in your closet was suddenly so…little? You’re practically falling out of all of them. It’s almost indecent how much cleavage is showing with this one, especially since it’s strapless. You’d forgotten how small they’d used to be before you had kids. This one is tight everywhere else too - really tight - but not so tight that it’s unbearable. It’s not so bad…but it’s just not right. You feel overexposed, like it barely covers anything.
The corners of your eyes prickle and you let out a sigh of frustration. Right. It's probably because you haven’t gone shopping for dresses since before you got pregnant - for the first time. You curse yourself silently for not making time to go shopping before today, but Namjoon had only sprung this cocktail party on you a week in advance, and you had meant to, but there had been one thing or another that had kept you from going, what with being the stay-at-home mom of a four and two year old. Junseok had started on his “getting into everything” phase, while Miyoung, of course, was in the midst of her terrible twos, which you’d barely survived with Junseok the first time around, and per her usual, Miyoung just had to one-up her brother by being even worse. You’d barely had a free moment to yourself since before you’d had kids, and that was probably the reason you hadn’t realized just how much you’d let yourself go in the last year or two. You almost don’t even recognize yourself. The woman in the mirror looks old, worn out, tired - nothing like you. You conclude that she’s not actually you, but a clone, and the younger, prettier version of yourself is out there somewhere, walking around and living her best life. If only that were true. 
You glance at the clock. 6:30. You’re supposed to be there by 7, and you haven’t even started your makeup yet, or done anything to your hair. Not that it would matter. Your hair doesn't hold a curl, never has, not even on your wedding day. And not even the thickest concealer could cover up the bags under your eyes, or make you look any less tired than you do now, without really caking it on. The eyeliner will probably get caught in the creases and smudge all over the place, and make you look like you’re still in your emo phase, the lipstick will probably either get on your teeth or wear off, and what the hell, what’s the point anymore? You might as well just not go anywhere when you look this bad. No use in embarrassing the both of you, especially not in front of your husband’s colleagues, and the tenure committee, and whoever else has to lay eyes on you at this thing. 
There’s a knock on the door, and you jump at the sudden noise. “Y/n?” It’s Namjoon. “The sitter’s here. Are you going to be ready soon? We should really get going.”
You hesitate, staring at the unattractive stranger in the mirror, and reply, “Um…I think maybe you should just go without me.” 
“What?” he says through the door. “Why would I go without you?” 
“No reason,” you say. “I, um, just don't feel good all of a sudden."
"Huh?" He sounds confused. "You were fine just a little while ago. Are you sick? What can I do? Do you need anything?"
A time machine, you think, biting the inside of your cheek, so I can go back to when I was pretty. And worthy of being seen in public. "No," you say. "I'm fine. Just go without me, okay?” 
"Well, if you're not going then I'm not going either," he says. "It's just a dumb cocktail party. There will be plenty of others. And I shouldn't be going anywhere if you're sick, either. What about the kids? Who’ll take care of you?"
Damn your husband for being so thoughtful. That man has been worrying about you since you started dating, more than you ever even worried about yourself. "I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself, Joonie. What do you think I did before I met you? The sitter can watch the kids. This is a big deal; I know how much you want this. You should go. Schmooze. Impress the tenure committee with all those impressive accomplishments of yours." 
"I don’t want to schmooze, not without you. I'm terrible at this kind of thing. I need you there to keep me from putting my foot in my mouth. I mean, we used to go to parties all the time. What’s different about this one?" Namjoon pauses. You picture him outside the door, big brain at work, trying to figure out what's going on. "Aegiya…is something wrong?" 
"Try everything," you say under your breath. "Nothing's wrong," you add aloud. "I don't feel well. End of story."
"You're acting weird," he says. "I'm coming in." He lets himself into the room before you can grab your bathrobe to cover up, and stops cold when he sees you, standing there, in that stupid strapless dress, jaw falling open. “Y/n…wow. You look…hot. Have I ever told you how much I love you in all black? All white is one thing, but…damn. It really suits you.”
Maybe it's the fact that you've been trying on dresses for the past hour or so with no luck, or the fact that you haven't eaten enough today, or that the exertion of wrangling yourself in and out of all of these dresses has left you overheated and sweaty, but a feeling of anger bubbles up in your chest. “You gotta be kidding me,” you snap and stomp into the bathroom, slamming the door behind you. “'Hot?' Are you serious? That’s not fucking funny, Namjoon.” You lean against the counter, arms crossed, on the verge of tears. He has to be joking, you think. That’s ridiculous. No way in hell.  
“Wait, what did I do?” he says. “You’re upset…because I said you looked nice?" 
“Of course I’m upset, are you blind?” you practically shout. 
“No?” He chuckles uneasily. “I’m not blind. I wouldn’t have said it if it weren’t true.” A knock comes on the bathroom door. “Come on, y/n.” 
“No!” you snap. “Leave me alone. Just go without me. You’re going to be late.” You let yourself slide down to the floor, hugging your knees to your chest and burying your face in your arms. 
He knocks again. “I’m not leaving until you open the door and talk to me, y/n. Tell me what’s going on. Maybe I can help.” 
“You can’t help.” Tears start to form in the corners of your eyes. “You wouldn’t understand.” Of course he wouldn’t. He still looks the same as he did on the day you met him. It’s like he hasn’t aged at all. It’s not fair.
“Then explain it to me,” he says patiently. “I’m a quick study. Will you please come out? Or let me in? I don’t like talking to you through the door.” 
You don’t say anything. How do you explain this? “Okay,” you say, almost inaudibly. “I guess you can come in.” You look up as he opens the door, the visible concern on his face enough to turn the prickles in the corners of your eyes into full-fledged tears. Your face crumples, and before you know it, you’re sobbing.  
“Hey. Come here.” Namjoon sits down on the floor next to you and pulls you close, folding you into his warm embrace and letting your tears soak into the front of his charcoal-colored blazer. He presses a kiss to your forehead and touches your chin, coaxing you into looking at him. ��Tell me, aegiya. What’s wrong?” 
“Everything. Nothing,” you say, hiccuping. “It’s stupid. Really.” 
“It can’t be nothing if it’s making you this upset,” he says. 
Of course he’s right. You draw in a shaking breath. “Nothing looks right on me!” you wail. “I went through my whole closet before I got to this dress, and I still hate the way it looks. I hate the way everything looks, myself included. My boobs used to be a normal size, and everyone said they’d go back to normal once I stopped breastfeeding, but they haven’t, and they’re still huge, and they don’t fit anywhere, not to mention the stretch marks. Do you remember when I bought this dress?” 
“Not really,” he says. 
“Before I had Junseok, Joon. When I was still small, and pretty, and everything was the right size, and my stomach didn’t look like it had a watermelon crammed inside of it for nine months. There’s more stretch marks than skin, my arms are flabby, my face looks old and tired, my ass is huge, and nothing fits.” The words spill out, and you’re rambling, not sure if you’re making any sense. “I don’t recognize the person in the mirror anymore, and I hate it. I have this image of myself, and what I used to be and what I am now, and none of it lines up. I used to be pretty and now I’m just a fat, ugly mom, while you still look the same as you always have, and I don’t know how you’re even still attracted to me, if you are, because I’m definitely not much to look at anymore.” Tears run down your face, and you burrow further into his chest. 
He rubs a hand up and down your arm. “That’s what’s upsetting you so much?” 
You nod, sniffling.
“Well, I’m sorry you’re feeling that way, aegiya. You’re right, I can’t even begin to understand. But let me be the first to tell you that I’m not going anywhere.” He kisses you on the forehead. “It would make me a pretty terrible person and that much less of a man if I left you because I didn't like the way your body changed while you were having my children. Your body is amazing, y/n. That body grew and nurtured two little humans. It took care of them until they were ready to come into the world, and kept them fed and nourished once they did. I can’t do any of that. That body gave me two wonderful gifts I could only ever dream of reciprocating, and it hurts me to see you feeling like this.” He plants another kiss on your cheek. “I’ve never stopped being attracted to you, aegiya. Not once since the day I first laid eyes on you. I know you don’t think so so but you're still the same stunner I fell in love with back then. You're still the beautiful girl I married. You’re not a, what was it, ‘a fat, ugly mom?’ If anything, becoming a mother has only made you even prettier.”
"Bullshit," you mutter, scowling. “Motherhood has made me look like death warmed over, 24/7. I don’t know how you could love that.”
"Y/n, it's not bullshit." He touches his hand to your cheek. "I love every single thing about you. That goofy laugh you hate, the way your whole face crinkles when you smile, the way you sing to the kids when they’re sick, or they can’t sleep, even though you’re way off-key, and yes, each and every individual stretch mark on that beautiful body of yours. I love all of it. So if looks are what you’re worried about, then don’t, because you’re perfect, the way you look right now, and the way you looked yesterday, and the way you looked five years ago.” He wipes at the tears still on your cheeks with the pad of his thumb. “Does that make you feel any better?” 
“Well…no.” Your lower lip trembles. “You don’t really mean that, do you? You’re just saying that to make me feel better. There has to be at least one thing you’d change about me if you could, isn’t there? I know there’s a few things I’d like to change about you, if I had the chance. Your snoring, for one. I definitely don't love that."
“Maybe I would,” he says. “Maybe I wouldn’t. It wouldn’t change the way I feel about you. You’re the person I chose to share my life with. Which means I accept you for you, all of your perceived flaws and supposed blemishes. So no, I wouldn’t change a thing. Those are all the things that make you you. And you are special. To me, and to Miyoung, and Junseok, your friends, your family, and everyone else who has the privilege of having you in their life. You’re a beautiful woman and an amazing mother, and I’m proud to call you my wife.” He strokes your hair. “How about now? Better?”
“I guess so,” you say slowly, your head still resting against his chest. You listen to his heartbeat thumping. “What did I ever do to deserve a husband as kind and as patient as you? You know? How did I get so lucky?”
“You chose me, remember? And I chose you right back.” He smiles gently, wiping away the last few remaining tears. “We’re both pretty lucky, don't you think?” 
"The luckiest." You allow a tiny smile to creep onto your face. "I'm sorry for being so insecure." 
"You don't ever have to apologize for having feelings,” he says, giving you a squeeze. 
"Thank you.” You meet his gaze. “For listening. For being patient with me."
"I'll always be here to listen," he says. "No matter what. And life is a learning curve for all of us. Myself included."
"And thank you for not leaving me," you add.
"I'll never leave you, y/n. Not now, not ever. I promised you for better or for worse, and I plan on keeping that promise," he says. 
You reach up and tousle his hair, managing a teary smile. “Me too. I promise.” 
Namjoon tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "Well, what do you say? Are you still not feeling up to coming out with me? I think we could still make it on time if we hurry, but we don’t have to go anywhere if you don’t want to." He looks at you, smiling tentatively. 
"No, I think I'm okay now. God, I'm probably a mess. All puffy and red." As you're rubbing your eyes, you notice the big wet spot on the front of Namjoon's jacket and part of the white shirt he’s wearing underneath. "Oh, damn. I ruined your jacket, didn't I? You’ll have to change."
"Don't even worry about it, aegiya." He pulls you in for a kiss, plush lips intertwining with yours. "I have plenty of other jackets. But I only have one wife, and she comes first. Always."
–––– 
©2022 by mrworldwideshoulders
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dis-easedfairy · 5 years ago
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Oink The Stuffed Pig
WARNINGS: Swearing | Mentions of Sex (a dirty joke or two) |
Pairings: Kim Seokjin x Single Dad!Male Reader
Genre: Parent!au, neighbor!au, some angst (just a lil), fluff, humor 
Word Count: 11,838
Summary: Due to complications, M/n moves to a new city with his son. Though struggling, the two grow to like their new lives and new neighborhood, especially Kim Seokjin, their neighbor across the hall who is more than kind. 
A/n: IM ALIVEEEE! I suck at endings so like... my bad. I tried to get this out because I know a few of you were excited for this. Turned out a little more angst than I plan but uh... surprise? Again sorry it took me so long to finish it! 💙☀
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I sighed and looked out the window as the train I was in, drove down the tracks. I looked at my watch it was around 7 pm and I knew it was going to be a long night. I looked over to my son, he was happily playing a game on an old phone of mine. I let out a sigh as my eyes trailed down to look at our backpacks on the floor.
I’m sorry we have to go this far.
I leaned forward, opening the side pouch of my backpack to take out my phone. I had muted it days ago and didn’t bother to look at it.
I unlocked it and looked through my messages.
Mom: Okay, just be safe, okay? The both of you.
Dad: remember to secure the new home. it will give everyone a piece of mind
.
Unknown Number: you cant just take him! I said I wanted to work this out!
I rolled my eyes at the last one, deciding just to message my parents since we were more within the city.
M/n to Mom: I found a nice little neighborhood, close to his school and there are some good jobs I can get for the time being, just until I save up a bit. We’ll be safe. Don’t worry too much.
M/n to Dad: I had a security system kit sent with some of our stuff. I’m going to go to the store tomorrow to look for tougher screws for the doors. We have a balcony so I have to figure something out! Safety is my second priority!
“Who are you talking to?” I heard my son’s small voice ask.
I looked over to him, his eyes were big, full of curiosity as he lifted himself up in order to look at the screen. I only smiled.
“Your grandparents.” He gave me a small pout.
“Why the pout?” I asked with a sad chuckle, “…Expecting someone else?” I asked dejectedly.
I swore I saw his eyes twinkle, “Aunt Hyejin!” My heart dropped to my stomach.
I tore my eyes away from his, prepping myself to lie, “Ha… Aunt Hyejin… she…” Oh god, what would be a good lie to tell him?
I glanced back at his perfect brown orbs, stabbing into me for an answer.
“A… Aunt Hyejin is not herself right now. So… I can’t talk to her right now, okay?” I wasn’t lying, but it sure in the hell felt like I was.
I could see the sadness enter his eyes, as well as those same eyes water. My eyes widened as I quickly held my hands up as if he were now holding a weapon to me.
“But why?” He asked, his voice sounding very upset.
“Junseok-ah, it’s complicated. BUT you’re going to make new friends and have your own room!” I tried to sway my son.
“I don’t want new friends I want Aunt Hyejin!” He was now crying, I grimaced.
I looked around the empty train car almost frantically, as to search for something to get my son to stop crying. I let out a heavy sigh.
“Listen, Junseok-ah, stop crying. Some people aren’t going to be in your life for the rest of your life. Some people have their own lives to live, some care dearly about you, and some will care only for themselves. It has nothing to do with your personality or who you are as a person. Aunt Hyejin… I have a feeling she only cares for herself right now. And right now, I have to care about you, and you have to care about yourself right now too.” That probably made no sense to him.
Oddly enough my son only nodded his head, using his sleeve to wipe his tears, I offered him a small smile.
“Don’t worry, I got us a place to stay and you have your own room!” Which I have no Idea how I’m going to pay for it.
“We live near a school you’ll be going too!” Some of your new teachers think I’m irresponsible for moving so late in the year and hate me already.
“I’m getting a new job, so new cool things!” You might not get anything good for your birthday if it's a low-paying job.
“Our new home is in a nice neighborhood with lots of kids so you’ll make friends.” You’re more extroverted than me and the families will more than likely hate me.
“It’s a little far from grandpa and grandma, but this is a better life!” I’m scared.
“…Okay. Can we get something to eat before we go to our new house?” He asked softly.
I nodded, not wiping the smile off my face, “We’ll get whatever you want. Just don’t be sad or scared. Just know that I love you with all my heart. Forever.”
Junseok sniffled a bit and moved closer to wrap his arms around my neck. I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him onto my lap to keep him closer. I could feel him relax in my hold as I moved my hand to rub his back.
“We have reached Hoehyeon Station.”
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“So how have you settled in?” My friend Jeongguk asked, he was the one who convinced me to move to Seoul.
I could hear my son let out a scream as he ran around with a plushie pig toy and a Spider-Man toy, a throw blanket tied around his neck as a makeshift cape. I soon then heard a bump and something clatter to the floor. I was unpacking a box on the kitchen counter, taking out glasses and plates.
I let out a heavy sigh, “As settled as we can be I gue-,”
“NO! NO! NO! NO!” I could hear my son shout, making me snap into action as I threw everything I was holding down and ran to his voice.
He was in my bedroom, the window open and him half hanging out.
“Junseok! What are you doing!?” I demanded, running over to yank him away from the open window.
“I dropped Oink! I have to get him!” My son protested as I threw him over my shoulder to stop him from squirming out my grip.
“You won’t get anything besides a trip to the hospital hanging out the window like that!” I scolded, sitting him on my bed.
I pulled back to see his tear-filled eyes. I let out a deep sigh, “If I tell a friend of mine to look after you, will you behave while I look for Oink?” I can’t believe I was going to search in an ally for a stuffed pig.
Junseok quickly nodded his head, almost desperate to get his oldest friend back.
“Fineeee.” I groaned, walking back to the kitchen to get my phone.
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“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” I grumbled, moving a trash bag out the way as I tried to look for a bright pink stuffed pig.
I let out a growl of frustration, “Where are you, you little bitch?” I grumbled, trying to think of new places to look.
I looked at my watch and sighed, I was in a hoodie and jeans but it was only getting colder as the sun was no longer in the sky. It was close to 11 pm and I didn’t want to spend all night looking for a stuffed animal. My son cherished that stuffed pig since it was his first stuffed animal but was it really worth it?
Yes, it was. My son loved it so I will find it.
I groaned at myself, kicking a trash bag and going back to looking for the lost pig.
I was ready to give up thirty minutes later until I saw pink fuzz that looked familiar. I quickly moved whatever was in the way and yanked the pig up into my view.
“Fuck yesss!” I chuckled in satisfaction as I began to dust off and examine the pig.  
I frowned when I noticed how flat and lumpy it was, it was less to it being dropped out a window, and more about the years of washing, drying and laying on it.  
“Mmm, you need a good stuffing, huh?” I asked the pig, examining it more for rips or stains.
“…Uhhh…” I heard a voice draw out behind me.
I immediately spun around to face the person. A man, he was a little taller than me, wearing a white sweater, dark sweatpants, and white shoes. He had broad shoulders and had the most handsome face I’ve ever been blessed with ever seeing. His eyes were wide as he held onto a trash bag, his eyes dropped to see the flattened stuffed pig and he let out a breath of relief with a chuckle.
“I…” He let out a very unique laugh that tumbled from his rose-colored plush lips, bending over, “I thought… Oh my god…” He tried to speak but only laughter came out.
He looked fairly young but I had no idea how I was supposed to address him, “S-Sir? Is something funny?” I asked, praying he wasn’t some guy who lost his mind and planned to murder me in an ally after I spent an hour and a half looking for a stupid stuffed pig.
He held up one finger as he continued to laugh. I assumed it was to give him a minute so I did.
“You have to understand,” He began, trying to catch his breath, “I just heard your words and saw your back and nothing more!” I saw red begin to bloom in his cheeks.
I tilted my head slightly in confusion. He took my confusion as the go-ahead to explain which he only did in few words, with a smirk.
“Fuck yes? You need a good stuffing?”
It slowly clicked together as heat began to rush to my face and embarrassment washed through me.
“I-I was just talking about a stuffed animal!” I raced to explain, which only made him cackle more.
“Wait! No! I’m not fucking the stuffed animal! That sounded wrong!” The man was now leaning against the building, trying not to fall to the ground from laughing so hard.
“M-My son dropped this out the window, he can’t sleep without it.” I explained nervously.
The man straightened up, trying to gain his composure, “You’re a dad?” He asked breathlessly.
I know I’m ‘too young’.
“Yeah. He’s four… This is an awkward way to meet… We just moved in today.” I gave the man a small smile.
He looked surprised, “Really? Nice to meet you! I’m Kim Seokjin!” He introduced himself happily, moving to shake my hand.
“L/n M/n.” I informed, shaking his hand.
“Welcome to the neighborhood, hopefully, there are no more… misunderstandings.” He joked.
I felt a wave of heat travel to my face again, “I hope not.” I agreed with a nervous giggle.
Seokjin opened his mouth as if he was going to say more but as interrupted by my screeching friend.
“M/N! WHAT IS OUR SON’S FIXATION WITH THE TOILET!? HE TRIED TO FLUSH MY PHONE!” Jeongguk shouted out the window.
Well, that was a nice moment…
I let out a deep sigh, “Sorry, I have to head back up. I’ll talk to you soon, Seokjin?” I questioned.
He nodded, seeming at a lost for words. I frowned a bit. He was so open a few moments ago. I walked past him, giving him a small wave as I began to jog back into the building.
I ran to one of the two elevators and pushed my floor number. Using the time to think of what jobs I could apply to and how to make sure ‘Aunt Hyejin’ didn’t come to visit my son while he was in school.
The ding of the elevator broke me from my thoughts and I went to my apartment door. Before I could dig in my back pocket for my keys, my door flung open to reveal my friend Jeongguk.
“He keeps flushing things in the toilet. You lost a roll of toilet paper. ” My friend informed me, crossing his arms, looking upon me in judgment.
“He’s acting out because he wasn’t very excited about coming here…” I notified, rubbing the back of my neck with the hand that wasn’t gripping the stuffed animal.
Jeongguk sighed. I could hear another ‘ding’ but took it as the elevator I got off of closing it’s doors and going back down.
“I know he’ll like it here, you will too. Did…” Jeongguk looked down, biting his bottom lip as he chose his next words carefully.
“Did Hyejin know where you were going? I don’t think it’s a good idea if she knew where we live.” Jeongguk voiced apprehensively.
“Don’t worry about her. I just told her I was leaving town. She tried to tell Junseok that he could stay at her place if he didn’t want to go.” I stated bitterly.
“Are you fucking with me? She literally doesn’t quit does she!?” Jeongguk scoffed, anger beginning to radiate off of him.
I shook my head, “I was just wondering how we would get him to school without her finding him.”
Jeongguk’s eyes widened, “Do you think she’d go school hunting!?”
“I wouldn’t put it past her.” I grunted bitterly.
Jeongguk let out a frustrated sigh, leaning on the doorframe and pinching the bridge of his nose with two fingers. After a few moments, Jeongguk looked up, sadness and sympathy in his eyes. He reached out, grabbing the collar of my hoodie and pulled me into a hug. He wrapped one arm around my waist and his other hand was in the middle of my back. He let out a long exhale as he began to rub my back. I wrapped my arms around him, fully accepting the comfort in my friend’s embrace, even going as far as to bury my face in his shoulder.
“We’ll figure this out together, M/n. I’ll introduce you to some friends of mine, we’ll settle you in, get you a job and support you for as long as you need, okay?” Jeongguk promised.
I felt a weight lift off my shoulders, knowing I wouldn’t do this alone. I was prepared to do it alone, but I knew Jeongguk wouldn’t let me. He was my best friend. I really counted on him and he counted on me.
The comforting resolve was disrupted by the sound of a flushing toilet.
Jeongguk let out an irritated growl. Jeongguk yanked away to turn to look into the apartment.
“WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT THE TOILET!?” Jeon demanded, grabbing my arm and dragging me into the apartment with him.
I made a wild grab to close the door behind us, trying to fight Jeongguk’s tight grip. I pushed the door closed and Jeongguk let me go, deeming me as the reason he couldn’t move fast enough to scold my son. I only chuckled, moving to the kitchen to throw the stuffed animal in the washing machine.
“YAH! NO SON OF MINE WILL FLUSH IRON MAN DOWN THE TOILET!” I rolled my eyes at Jeongguk’s words.
I could hear my son whine a response as I set the washer to quick wash. I heard footsteps and turned to see Jeongguk holding an armful of toys.
“Uncle Gukkie!” My son whined, trailing after him.
“No! You can’t have these back until you learn how to treat them right.” Jeongguk huffed, dropping the toys in an empty box and swiftly picking it up so Junseok couldn’t snag a toy back.
“Why all his toys?” I chortled.
They both looked over at me, my son with pleading eyes and my friend with the eyes of determination.
“Because our son needs to know what ‘stop’ and ‘don’t do that’ means.” He asserted.
“Stop calling him ‘our son’, people will get the wrong idea.” I giggled, moving to get the detergent.
“No! I’m helping you raise this brat, so he’s my son too!” I shrugged my shoulders. Fair enough.
“Any ideas for dinner?” I asked, starting the washer.
“Daddd!” Junseok whined in complaint of me not defending his toys.
I just knew Jeongguk made up his mind and I mostly agreed with him.
“We’ll order take out for now. Tomorrow we’ll have a better plan, we might be a little too busy for a sit-down meal though.” Jeongguk smiled, happy I wasn’t fighting him.
I nodded in understanding, “We’ll have to get some kind of ‘we are new to the neighborhood, don’t mind the screaming’ gift.”
“I think we’ll be fi-” Junseok cut Jeongguk off by jumping up and grabbing the edge of the box.
Junseok yanked down, causing the box to rip and toys spill out.
“JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!? I said you don’t get these back until you learn how to treat them!!” Jeongguk began and ‘our son’ began to argue back.
“I’m thinking baked goods.” I sighed.
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“Jeongguk, you…” I growled, holding one end of the entertainment center as Jeongguk held the other.
“You what!? Finish your sentence!” Jeongguk challenged, stopping in the middle of the entrance.
“You soggy piece of toast! Stop pushing me! You’re making me lose balance!” I snapped.
“You’re so fucking slow!” He clapped back.
“You’re so fucking impatient!” Thus the best friend bicker began.
Soon it wasn’t even about the stupid entertainment center, it wasn’t anything too harmful, just us venting out the stress of the day, per usual. We even set down the entertainment center to argue better.
“NO ONE EVEN LIKES THAT RAMEN SO WHY WAS THAT ONE ON SALE?”
“MAYBE BECAUSE NO ONE GOT IT SO IT WAS GOING TO EXPIRE!”
“THAT MUST HAVE BEEN IT!” After a few minutes of this, we finally drew some breath.
“Okay, now we can get back to work.” Jeongguk exhaled.
I have a quick glance around, “Uh… where is Junseok?” I asked blankly.
Jeongguk quickly spun around to face the living room, “He WAS on the couch!??”
Jeongguk and I slowly met eyes as the realization dawned on us. My best friend and I jumped into action.
“CALL THE POLICE!” Jeongguk shouted as he ran at the door.
As soon as the door opened I could see the door across the hall slightly ajar. This led me to think that my son got curious as to what the door was because he’s never lived in an apartment before.
I tried to grab onto my best friend’s shirt to stop him but he was already out the door and down the hall to the stairs before I could say anything. I heard him shove the door open to the stairway and take off. I sighed, wishing he would’ve saved me the effort of having to call him.
I hesitantly closed my apartment door and made my way to the door across the hall. I lightly pushed open the door, caution pulsing through my veins. I could hear bad playing of a guitar flood the nice-lit, comfy apartment.
“Don’t go too hard on the strings or they will break.” I heard a familiar male voice softly instruct.
The air smelled like muffins and I could hear the sound of a tv. I entered the apartment as quiet as I could, taking off my shoes and taking a deep breath. I raised my hand up and tapped my knuckles on the wall beside me.
“Come in!” A cheerful voice chimed, making the place seem even more inviting.
I stepped forward out the entryway to round the corner. My son was sitting on the floor, holding a guitar WAY too big for his body. His tongue was sticking out, his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to focus on the cords he was strumming.
The man I met in the ally, Seokjin, was sitting on the chair with the stuffed pig on his lap. The pig was plushier than before. I assumed Seokjin restuffed the animal since he had a sewing needle in hand, mid-tug of the thread. Seokjin’s eyes seemed to widen at my arrival.
“I’m sorry if he interrupted your afternoon. He was on the couch one moment then he was gone the next.” I apologized, bowing my head in remorse.
“That’s okay! He hasn’t caused me any trouble.” Seokjin assured me.
I lifted my head up, “Really!? He’s been bratty since we arrived.” I was dismayed. My son listened to a complete stranger more than me!?
Seokjin’s plush lips pulled into a smile, “Yes. Your son has been well behaved!” Seokjin grabbed the scissors and snipped off the extra thread from the pig. Seokjin stood up, a new aura around him that was ignored by my son as Seokjin seemed to strut up to me.
“If you feel that bad about interrupting my afternoon, you can treat me to a better one this week?” Seokjin implied, his eyes whirling with confidence.
I almost choked on air. Did my attractive neighbor just ask me out?
“I… Well…” I was at a loss for words.
Seokjin’s small smile turned into a bigger one, almost cocky, “How about tomorrow? Here. At six.” He tempted, one of his hands moving up to fix my shirt. I’m pretty sure he could feel my heart going faster than it’s ever gone before.
Seokjin’s eyes playfully cast up, awaiting my response.
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“So what did you tell him?” Jeongguk asked, getting himself a glass of lemonade and leaning against the kitchen island I was currently sitting at. Head in my hands as my body burned with humiliation. Junseok was on the couch, too emersed in his game to understand how badly I ruined myself.
“I shouted ‘I’m gay’ and ran out.” I grumbled.
Lemonade shot out from Jeongguk’s nose, spraying out onto the countertop. My eyes widened and I jumped up to get him some paper towels, grabbing a few myself to catch the liquid that threatened to ruin the floor. Jeongguk grabbed the paper towels and held them up to his face as he began to cough and sputter. I swore I heard slight chuckling in the distress.
“I-I don’t… I don’t think that line works in THIS scenario…” Jeongguk coughed as he moved his cup to the sink, having no desire to have lemonade again any time soon.
“I panicked!” I tried to defend myself.
“Do you want to go on a date with him?” He inquired.
I threw my hands up, “I don’t know! I hardly even know the guy!”
My best friend rolled his eyes, “Well, you won’t know him anytime soon with you shouting ‘I’m gay’ while running out his apartment like he was asking you if you knew his lord and savior Jesus Christ.” Jeongguk smirked.
“I didn’t say ‘I’m gay’ while running out! I said it then ran out. Get your shit straight, Jeon.” I dropped back down to my seat with a pout. I leaned forward, dropping my head so my face was against the cold countertop, groaning in defeat and embarrassment.
“Okay, I’m sorry.” Jeon tried to refrain from smiling, but was failing horribly, “I shouldn’t tease you about this. Maybe go over, see if the offer stands and if he was serious. He came on a little strong. You never know, he might be as freaked out as you.”
My head lifted up and my eyes filled with hope. “Will it be that easy? You think so?” I asked in ease.
“No. He definitely thinks you’re weird and probably has another date set up in your spot. When you get there tomorrow, you’ll be interrupting his date.”
There were a few moments of silence as my expression fell and his lifted.
“I hope that lemonade burned your nose.” I muttered, laying my head back on the island.
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"But Uncle Jeonnnn." My son whined from the kitchen island the next day, after a busy morning.
"No. I said we'd get ice cream AFTER you put away all your toys." Jeongguk asserted, lightly kicking the large box of toys that had been taped up from being ripped.
I only shook my head as I loaded the fridge with groceries.
"But I already cleaned my room, helped dad in the kitchen and helped you!" My son bargained.
"He has been helping a lot today, Jeon," I informed with a small smile.
Jeongguk's head snapped to face me, betrayal written in his eyes, "Who's side are you on!?"
I let out a sigh. I had two toddlers now.
"I'm not picking a side. Junseok, he said after you put your toys away. But Jeongguk, you can't discredit the work he's put in today without being a brat or complaining once. " I resolved.
My best friend pouted, deep in thought. He then turned to my son.
"How about we get junk food and play video games for an hour as your reward?" Jeon suggested, making my son's eyes light up.
"Good, because I don't want to go back on my word. You only get ice cream when you put away your toys. Go get ready." Jeon chuckled.
My son jumped up and rushed to his room quickly as if Jeon would change his mind in under thirty seconds. Jeongguk stood next to me to open the fridge for a bottle of soda.
"Are you sure you're okay with this? I know you said you wanted to help, but I don't want you to be doing all this because you feel obligated to." I frowned.
Jeongguk raised his eyebrow and swallowed, "M/n? I'm only taking him to the convenience store and back?"
"That's not it, " I rolled my eyes, "You've helped me mostly unpack, arrange the apartment and even took a week off from work to get us settled in. You've given a lot in the past few days."
It was then my best friend's turn to roll his eyes, "Seriously? Friends help friends move. And BEST friends arrange your fucking apartment for you because you don't have your shit together. If I didn't want to be here I wouldn't show up. You and your son deserve some happiness right now, so if I have to call another customer service line to help me set up a shelf, I fucking will."
I smiled at how much determination filled his eyes. "You didn't have the right tool, like a dumbass," I recalled, trying not to cackle.
"The manual said I didn't need a hammer!" He snapped.
"Your voice got a little offended there. Did I hit a nerve?" I teased.
"Know what? Fuck you, " Jeongguk stated dramatically as he put down his soda and began to stride out the kitchen, "I'm leaving you! I'm going to stay with my parents and I'm taking our son with me!" He ranted as he walked into the hall.
I chuckled, shaking my head as I moved back to stock up the kitchen. After I loaded the pantry I looked around for the box with the plates. I walked more into the living room to examine the stacked boxes by the door but didn't find any more boxes for the kitchen. I frowned.
"Hey, Jeongguk?" I called rotating boxes, hoping I read them wrong.
"Yes?" He called back from my room.
"Do you know where the last box for the kitchen is?"
"Check the hall! There are a few boxes out there that just got delivered!" In the hall!?
I shook my head in judgment and walked to the front door and out into the hall. Sure enough, to the left of my door were two stacks of boxes, four boxes high. I jogged back into the apartment to get my box cutter off the kitchen counter and ran back out to get to work on opening the last kitchen box that conveniently sat on the top of the first stack.
After I cut the tape open, I retract the blade in the box cutter and shoved it in my front hoodie pocket for easy access. I opened the box and took out a plate to examine it for any damages.
I could hear Jeongguk and my son talking as they entered the living room, then the entryway to pull on their shoes.
"Off to get junk?" I asked, checking other plates.
"Yes! He even dressed himself." My eyes widened at my best friend's words, making me spin around to face my mismatched son.
He had on red pants, a white T-shirt, green converse, a pink hat, and a yellow zip-up hoodie.
"...Junseok...Why?" I wasn't disappointed or judging, just confused.
Junseok shrugged, "It's comfortable."
"I mean, at least that's what matters." I gave him a warm smile.
Jeongguk reached in his back pocket, "He's adorable, I should take a picture." Jeon froze.
"Fuck! I forgot my phone. Wait here, Seok." Jeon gave my son two quick pats on the head and dashed inside.
My son and I gave each other and look then shifted our gazes to the apartment to give my best friend a judgemental look he couldn't see. Once Jeongguk came back, he took my son's hand and gave us both a big bunny smile.
"We're off!" He announced, puffing out his chest.
"To see the wizard?" I teased.
"Off what?" My son questioned.
Jeongguk deflated, "Let's just go." He grumbled as I held back a chuckle.
"Bye, Dad!" Junseok happily waved and began to drag my best friend down the hall.
"I'll grab you the usual!" Jeon quickly told me as my son dragged him to the elevators.
I giggled, shaking my head. I turned back to the boxes and lifted up the kitchen one. I took the box into the kitchen, setting it down on the island and made my way back out to the hall. I grabbed the top box on the second stack, turning it to get a better look at what I had written on the side of it.
As I was checking I could hear footsteps behind me. I smirked, figuring it was my friend forgetting something, "Forgot your wallet now, Jeon?" I teased, turning around.
I was met with someone who wasn't Jeongguk.
Seokjin was looking down at the floor. It looked like he had been biting at his lips and his hands were shoved in his pocket.
"Hello, M/n..." His voice was awkward and I didn't expect it from the man who was so confident and straightforward yesterday.
"Seokjin! Hi! How is your day so far?" I asked just as awkwardly.
There were a few moments of uncomfortable silence. Seokjin let out a groan of frustration as he pulled his hands out his pockets and lifted his gaze.
"I wanted to apologize!" He stated, his chest seeming to puff up.
I pressed my lips together in an effort to not smile, "Apologize for what?"
"I came on too strong yesterday." -Seokjin looked down at the floor again- "You had barely met me and I thought if I made an impression, you'd be as interested as me. I talked to my friend about it and he called me a dumbass. I understand why though. You and your boyfriend seem to be happy together and have a son an-" I raised one finger up as I let out a small giggle of disbelief.
I knew it was rude to interrupt but I just had to.
"Y-You... You think Jeongguk and I are boyfriends?" I held back laughter.
His eyes widened slightly, seeming even more embarrassed, "Are you not??"
"Jeongguk is my best friend, he has a habit of calling my son 'our son' because he's been around him since birth and helped me a lot with raising him. I feel nothing but platonic feelings for Jeongguk and he feels the same. We're like brothers." I explained, a smile on my face.
So Seokjin was a softie. I should've guessed.
"I... I could've sworn... Well, that makes sense!" Seokjin threw his hands up and groaned, turning around so his back was to me and put his face in his hands.
"Seokjin? If the offer still stands I would love to go on a date with you. I just don't know if I can do it tonight." I smirked, feeling bolder now that I knew he was as awkward as me.
"I'll admit you DID make an impression. You made me so flustered I told you I was gay and ran." I added light-heartedly.
I heard Seokjin let out a small laugh and saw his shoulders shake a bit.
I pressed my lips together, thinking of how to make this situation less awkward.
“Would you like to have a drink with me? I’m kinda tired and need a break.” I smiled.
Seokjin nodded, only moving when I began to walk into my apartment.
“Woww!” He exclaimed in awe.
“What is it?” I asked, spinning around, full of fear.
“Your apartment looks so clean!” I let out a breath of relief.
I thought he found something bad. Like my son leaving a half-eaten sandwich on the floor or even Jeongguk forgetting my underwear on the couch because he insisted that he do laundry today.
Glad it wasn’t anything bad, I strolled to the kitchen to serve us glasses of lemonade. Seokjin looked around a bit before making his way into the kitchen.
“So, who’s your friend with the blunt advice?” I giggled, lifting my glass to my lips.
Seokjin smiled, “Yoongi. He goes back and forth between staying at my apartment and our friend Hoseok’s apartment. The day I did that was the day he was at Hoseok’s. He said I was like a toddler who he couldn’t leave alone.”
“Jeongguk says the same thing. He teased me endlessly for what I did,” I chuckled.
“Well, now we’re having a conversation like adults.”
“More like teenagers, because we’re having lemonade awkwardly.”
“Adults awkwardly drink lemonade too!” I laughed, only shaking my head.
“How old are you anyway? I want to say you’re my hyung, but the way you act contradicts that.” Seokjin pressed his hand to his chest in fake offense.
“I’m 26!”  
“So you’re a goofy hyung.”
“And you’re a rude dongsaeng!” Now it was my turn to be offended.
“How so!?”
“You should’ve asked my age when we met!”
“Well, I’m sorry I was distracted!”
“I know I’m handsome but please have manners!” My face pretty much heated up the whole room.
“It’s because Jeongguk shouted out the window! Then the second time you cornered me!” I defended my honor as best as I could.
“Ahh, I knew my handsome face affected you.” He smiled playfully, shifting his hand to blow me a kiss.
“…I will kick you out of my apartment.”
Seokjin let out a laugh, “Why?”
“Because you’re backing me into a corner!”
“If it makes you feel any better, I think you’re handsome too.”
“…Where is Yoongi-hyung when you need him.”
“Yah! Why do you automatically call him hyung and not me!?”
“Because I learned my lesson!”
“Why didn’t you learn it before me!?”
“…I’m sorry, Hyung. I’ll do better next time.”
Seokjin smiled bigger, “Ah,” He clutched his chest, his face scrunching a bit like he was touched and proud, “what a respectful young man I’m raising you to be.”
“…I’m kicking you out.”
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Over the next few days, Seokjin and I would wave to each other and sometimes he would knock at my door just to hang out. Jeongguk and Junseok seemed to really like him. It wasn’t long before I gave him my number so he could just text me when he would come over so I could just leave the door unlocked and so we could talk more.
If he wasn’t complimenting himself or me over text he would be giving me horribly good dad jokes.
I settled in easily and got a job working at Jeongguk’s ‘assistant’ since he worked as a camera operator. I was supposed to be as qualified as him, but what ends up happening is him teaching me how to work the camera and then him judging me when I fuck up. I am getting better, and I’m happy to have my best friend working with me.
After work is usually when Seokjin invites himself over. Since Jungkook and I are mostly attached to the hip, we pick up Junseok and all go home to my apartment together, so we make a ton of noise.
I needed to clean my apartment and go shopping one day, so Seokjin agreed to watch Junseok. I thought he would mind at first but he said he ‘would be honored to teach this young man his ways’ if I just promised that I would feed him dinner too… I wasn’t sure if I should’ve left him with Seokjin…
I had Seokjin stay at my now clean apartment while he watched Junseok since it would be easier. It was just Seokjin and Junseok since Jungkook had to go back to his own apartment to clean up.
I looked at the two bags of chips, one was ‘original’, meaning salt and a ton of grease and other one was octopus flavored. Since I haven’t tried the octopus flavored chip, I figured ‘what the hell’ and dropped them both in my basket.
“Old habits never die huh?” I heard making me freeze.
Please don’t be her.
I spun around and felt my blood boil, “Hyejin, what the actual fuck are you doing here?”
She gave me an awkward smile, “It’s nice to see you too.”
“Drop the crap, what do you want.”
“You just leaving was cruel. He’s my son too.” I narrowed my eyes at her, fighting every urge not to explode in a semi-busy store.
“You wanted nothing to do with him because it inconvenienced your ‘perfect life’. So you can fuck off with that. You literally delivered him, then handed him to me and never even visited until a few months ago. ”
“Because I regretted my decision.”
“Because the party was over. The people who ‘knew you better than me’ decided you were expendable.”
She sighed, “Stop being so mean!”
“Stop pretending like you came to this decision yourself and like you actually give a fuck.”
“What makes you think that I don’t!?”
“What’s the name of Junseok’s pig?”
There was silence. I sighed at her look of panic. Maybe I was too harsh, but I didn’t want MY son to be hurt by an unreliable person who only cared about themselves.
“Listen,” I began, looking down at my hands, trying to think over my words, “We used to have something and I didn’t plan on having a son so soon. You basically took matters into your own hands and forced this on the both of us. You had him, then handed him to me and never even looked his direction. I moved here to start over with him. So he wouldn’t hear stories of his mother at least for now. You left us both. You can see where I’m coming from can’t you?”
I looked up at the end of my rant to see her fuming.
I guess she couldn’t see where I was coming from.
“You can’t just pick up and start over without me! I’m his mother!”
“A mother doesn’t give her child up for partying and people who don’t care about anyone or anything.”
“Stop bringing my friends into this! It’s YOUR fault!”
I let out an annoyed sigh. This was going nowhere.
“You’re obviously not mature yet. Please leave me and MY son alone. I would consider you visiting my son if you grew up a little bit because you obviously haven’t learned anything. He starts school soon, and if I see or hear of you stalking him there or waiting at the fucking gates, so help me I will get every lawyer I can get my hands on to MAKE you stay away. So I’m politely telling you to go fuck yourself.” I grabbed another bag of chips and began to push past her.
“You can’t take my son from me!” She yelled as I walked away.
“I didn’t! You handed him over!” I called back, trying to walk away in fucking style.
I couldn’t stop thinking about Hyejin on the elevator ride up to my apartment.
Maybe I WAS too harsh.
Or maybe she was too stubborn to take a fucking hint.
I kept wondering if there was a compromise we could come to or if something was wrong with my logic.
I was afraid she’d get bored like before then leave again. Play nice for a few weeks then leave.
I didn’t want someone like that in my son’s life but she was right, she was his mother and she had rights.
What if I DID have to involve the law?
What if they decided that I shouldn’t get my son?
What if it all went downhill because I was too stubborn to just let her see him??
What if I DID let her see him and she took him from me??
I was so stuck in my thoughts that I didn’t notice that I got out the elevator and shoved open my front door.
I didn’t snap out of it until I heard a male scream. My head snapped up to see Seokjin leap from the couch and frantically look around for something to defend himself. After finding nothing he, for some reason, settled on Oink who was laying on the couch, cocking his arm back like he was going to throw it at me.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa it's just me!" I held my hands up in front of me- "Put. The. Pig. Down!"
"You don't just walk into a man's home!" Seokjin scolded, shaking the pink stuffed pig at me in a demonstration of dominance.
“It’s MY apartment!”
“It was MY territory before you entered!”
“Like hell it is! I pay the bills!”
“I babysit and grace this place with my looks! Now tell me who REALLY provides for this family!”
As much as I tried to fight it, that made me smile. Despite me being too stressed and worked up to focus when I walked in, Seokjin made it all melt away in a matter of moments.
It was like 10 tons was lifted from my shoulders.
I sighed, letting my body relax, “You, Seokjin.” I smiled tiredly as I walked over to him.
He looked a little shocked at my words, still holding his guard up as I threw my arms around him to pull him into a thankful hug.
“You provide for this family more than you know.” I spoke, letting the silence hang in the air.
Then too much silence. It was only a few seconds of silence but it seemed like minutes. I was considering apologizing and pulling away, but I felt Jin wrap his arms around my waist and pull me closer.
It was now peaceful, comfortable, and reassuring silence.
It wasn’t like a hug with Jeongukk. Though it was filled with love and comfort, it felt like that but so much more.
I could feel my emotions pool in my chest and threaten to spill out. All from a simple hug.
“…I’m lost.” I admitted, hiding my face into his well-built shoulder.
Seokjin let out a small sigh, his arms tightening around me, “I’ll always be here to guide you.” He seemed to promise in a soft tone.
Maybe I could be willing to let Seokjin into my life more than I already had.
It really wouldn’t be so bad to let Seokjin be the person he wanted to be to me… Would it?
“So…about that date.” I began.
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“Remember not to put the glass pitcher in the front of the fridge!” I called to Jeongguk as he was sat on the floor with my son.
I could hear their loud game continue, letting me know that they were far from listening. Their bowls of noodles sat behind them on the coffee table, untouched as they numbed themselves to the gaming world,
“Yah! Eat your food!” I snapped, making Jeongguk roll his eyes with an annoyed groan.
“Fine, MOM. We’ll eat.” He sassed, tapping my son’s side to get him to turn to the table.
I could hear a soft knock on the door that made me rush over to it. I pulled open my door, ready to tell Jin to just come in because I needed to wait for my socks to get out the drawer but my jaw dropped at the sight of him.
Black leather jacket, black shirt, dark jeans, and dark boots. A beautiful earring dangled from one of his ears, giving just the right amount of flash to draw attention.
I couldn’t help but stare in awe of the man I happened to snatch up by chance. I was taken by surprise by the outfit. He usually went for a more softer look. So my dumbass was wearing an oversized sweater and jeans to match his soft look but now that wasn’t happening.
Seokjin began to smirk at my obvious staring but just like that, it was over. The moment ruined with a noodle flying across the room, sauce splattering a bit on his face and my son cackling like the tyrant he was growing up to be.
My eyes widened and I quickly ran to get paper towels as Jeongguk began to scold my son about wasting noodles.
I made a mental note to scold my son for not only wasting noodles but ruining a perfectly good leather jacket.
“Sorry, Hyung! I should’ve warned you not to wear anything nice.” I let out a small awkward laugh.
“After all I’ve done to save Oink and THIS is how I’m treated!?” Seokjin mocked offense, a smile blessing his face, making me let out a breath of relief.
Seokjin the ran over to my son to ‘tackle’ him to the floor and wiggle his finger’s against my son’s side, causing my son to squeal with laughter. Jeongguk quickly picked a side as he jumped on Seokjin’s back to annoy him, causing Seokjin to yell at Jeongguk, but not causing him to stop tickling my son.
I smiled as warmth spread throughout my chest. Despite Seokjin’s attire, he was too soft for his own good and I loved that about him. He didn’t prod at my personal life, he didn’t push his boundaries, or judge how young I was with a son. Or even judge my relationship with Jeongguk. He just took it as it was and didn’t try to change it, he just wanted to be involved. He wanted to know me. He wanted to be a part of my life and take care of us.
“Yah! You’re ruining my date!” I complained, causing Jeongguk to blow into Seokjin’s ear as a form of rebellion.
“Stop giving foreplay!” I snapped at Jeongguk, causing his eyes to widen and for him to freeze in place.
Seokjin used Jeongguk’s pause to his advantage, grabbing Jeongguk to have him on his back so Seokjin could tickle him relentlessly too. Jeongguk let out a loud laugh as he tried to squirm out of Seokjin’s grasp.
“M/N! GET YOUR BOYFRIEND!”
“I don’t know, man. The way you were teasing him makes me think he’s YOUR boyfriend…”
“LESS SHIT TALK, MORE HELP!”
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The date was not what I expected, but in a good way. Seokjin said he had a reservation somewhere and I thought it was a restaurant but after a few minutes of walking, he bought two bags of chips and some drinks as we casually strolled, which was gradually making my sanity decrease.
“So… Is this the date?” I asked as Seokjin’s eyes were trained on looking in his bag for the perfect chip.
“Would it be terrible if it was?” He asked, not bothering to look up.
“Not really, I just don’t really understand why we took an hour train ride to walk around.”
Seokjin only smirked. A moment of silence.
“So what do you think of koalas?” He tested.
“WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING!?”
Seokjin let out a laugh and kept walking. I glared at the back of his head, wondering if it would be too cruel to trip him.
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Words can never explain how much I felt like a child as I hastily pulled off my shoes and put them away. I practically vibrated with excitement as Seokjin led me into the empty place.
A trampoline park.
No one else but us and staff.  
I was frozen in place, taken by surprise at just how huge this place was, “How did you manage to do this!? Are you rich or something!?” I gasped, “Am I your sugar baby now?” I asked as Seokjin un-glued me from my spot by pulling me by the hand.
“As much as I want you to think I’m perfect, my friend Taehyung works here. He offered the night to us.” He explained, stepping on the boarders of the trampolines on the floor so he could walk easily.
“…Are all your friends cool?” I asked, causing Seokjin to stop in his tracks and whip his head around to face me.
“Yah! Why do you want to know? I’m the coolest out of them! I’m the only 10!” I pressed my lips together in attempts to not burst out laughing.
Seokjin shook his head, “Let’s play a game! There are a few balls around, I go on one side and you go on the other, it hits the wall behind me, you get a point, I hit it behind you, you get a point.”
I could feel my competitive spirit spur in my chest, “Oh you’re fucking on!” I smirked, playfully pushing him to the side and rushing to get to the other side of the room.
“WHY DID YOU PUSH ME!?”
“PLAY THE GAME HYUNG!”
Seokjin decided to set a timer, 20 minutes, whoever got the most points in those 20 minutes was the winner. The loser had to buy dinner and the tickets back home. A few minutes into the game and I was only pulling 2 points ahead.
Seokjin was more athletic then I gave him credit for. Soon it got way too hot in the sweater I decided to wear. I was so used to playing these kinds of games with Jeongguk that I didn’t question it when I yanked off my sweater and threw it to the side to quickly get back into the game before Seokjin attempted to score.
However, that didn’t happen. Seokjin was walking with the ball, eyes too focused on me to the point where he stepped wrong between two trampolines, causing him to slip and the brightly colored borders to go directly into his groin. My hand flew up to my mouth as I heard the wind get knocked out of him painfully. I could feel second-hand pain in my stomach as he fell to the side, his hands cupping the now extremely sensitive area, his eyes watered.
“Holy shit! Hyung!? Are you okay!?” I asked, trying to run over but ended up losing my balance. Which ended in me doing a useless belly flop in his direction.
Seokjin let out a pain-filled chuckle, “Stop being cute I’m dying!”
“I’m sorry, Hyung!” I apologized quickly, getting up as fast as I could and stepping on the border so I wouldn’t lose balance again.
Before I could race to him Seokjin’s words stopped me, “YAH! Put on your shirt first!!”
I nodded rapidly and rushed over to grab my sweater, yanking it on and turning to sprint to Jin. Which made my impatient ass slip.
Again.
I let out a frustrated groan as I belly-flopped again.
“Oh just fucking forget it!” Seokjin murmured breathlessly, rolling onto his back.  
“How about I just walk?” I suggested.
“That would be best considering this place is a death trap.”
I stood again, moving to walk carefully on the borders until I got to Seokjin. I kneeled down beside him, petting his head in attempts to comfort him.
“…Thank you.” He muttered, staring at the ceiling, looking like he was questioning every choice he’s ever made.
“…This means I win right?”
“Gloat all you want but I’m never bringing you here ever again and I’m telling Taehyung that he tried to kill me.”
“…No one had you staring.” I tried to hold back the laughter that was bubbling in my chest.
“SO NOW IT’S MY FAULT THAT YOU GOT NAKED IN FRONT OF ME!?” Seokjin suddenly popped off.
“I just took off my shirt. It was too hot.” I defended.
“TOO HOT IS RIGHT! YOU CHEATED! YOU KNEW THAT WOULD MAKE ME FLUSTERED! I WANT A REMATCH WHEN I CAN FEEL MY LEFT LEG AGAIN!” Seokjin ranted.
I giggled, “Hyung, just admit that you like my body and you lost.”
“I didn’t lose! You cheated! How would you feel if I took off my shirt during a game?”
“I would like it very much.” I teased.
I could see color bloom in Seokjin’s cheeks and ears.
I could feel adoration fill my chest, “You’re so cute.”
“I’m a 26-year-old man. I’m not cute.”
“If I get you dinner can I call you cute?”
“You get me dinner and I charge you for getting to have a meal with me.”
“You called me cute, this isn’t fair.”
“Don’t talk back to your hyung.”
“…My hyung just broke his balls…”
“And it demands respect!”
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I half expected Seokjin to take me to a cafe or something, but instead, he was arguing on the phone as I‌ grabbed chips out of a vending machine.
“I set up that reservation three hours ago!”‌ My eyebrows shot up.
“How the fuck did you even do that in the first place??”‌ Seokjin pressed his hand to the phone as if to completely keep the person on the other line from hearing.
“Someone canceled and I booked it.”‌ He responded in a hushed tone.
The other person seemed to say something because Seokjin quickly removed his hand and snapped, “They DID cancel!”‌
I only shook my head as I looked around. There were a few small restaurants. One looked like it had some good looking noodles. Another one had shrimp wrapped in something that I first thought was noodles. It was more like a batter of sorts, it was all dipped in the deep fryer. I was more curious about what the hell that dough was than hungry for it.
I‌ did see one stall that stood out though. An older woman was making knife-cut noodles. She didn’t have many people since there was a constant battle of everyone one-upping each other.
I turned to Seokjin, who was still arguing with this person who wasn’t budging. I grabbed his hand and began to pull him towards the stall. He was too focused on bickering that he just let me drag him along. I pushed down on his shoulders to make him sit then turned to the surprised woman.
“Two bowls please!”‌ I‌ eagerly asked.
“Would you like chicken or pork in your bowl?”‌ She asked, mirroring my smile.
I frowned a bit looking over at Seokjin, still arguing. I wasn’t really sure what he would prefer.
“One bowl of each? He’s a little stubborn.”‌ I chuckled awkwardly.
She only nodded in understanding as she began to cook the noodles. I was excited, getting chopsticks and looking over the add-in options.
“Hyung, she has soybean paste!”‌ I exclaimed.
I didn’t hear a break in his stupid dispute.
“WHY TELL ME THERE WAS A CANCELLATION IF THERE WASNT!? THEY CALLED TO CANCEL THEY CAN'T JUST TAKE IT BACK!”
I let out a huff. Well at least I know he’s passionate about what he believes in.
I reached up and grabbed his phone, ignoring his appalled face as I ended the call.
“Yah!‌ I was winning! That was rude!” He scolded me.
“You weren’t winning!‌ You were arguing with a wall! Pay attention to me.”‌ I grumbled, moving to shove his phone in my pocket.
“Hey! Give me my phone!”‌ He tried to lunge for it but I held my arm out to just keep it out his reach.
“We came out to have a nice time!”‌ I whined.
“We are having a nice time!”‌
“You arguing about a table is not a nice time!”‌
Seokjin was about to retaliate but was cut off by the woman setting the bowls in front of us.
“Thank you!”‌ I smiled at her, successfully pocketing the phone.
“Pork or chicken?”‌ I asked, handing him chopsticks.
Seokjin wordlessly grabbed the chopsticks from me and slid the bowl with chicken closer to himself. A pout rested on his rose lips.
I‌ groaned, “Hyung, the reservation wasn’t THAT important to argue for twenty minutes.”‌
More silence.
I let out a sigh and pulled the pork bowl closer, mixing the noodles and beginning to eat. I looked over to the add-in options and got the hot pepper paste. I put a decent sized dab in my bowl and offered it to Seokjin, who just took it in more muteness. I only rolled my eyes and went back to eating. Who knew an argument could mean so much to him.
After about half a bowl of noodles, he finally spoke.
“I‌ wanted tonight to be perfect.”‌
I raised an eyebrow at him. He was only staring at his noodles in defeat.
“And it is so far… except for you arguing for twenty minutes then ignoring me for ten.”
Seokjin turned to me, sadness in his eyes, “But you finally said yes!‌”
His words slowly sunk in as he continued, “I didn’t get a lot of time to set this up, but I still wanted to blow you away.”‌ Oh great now I felt like a dick for not planning the date at a later time.
“I said yes because I wanted to know you more, not what you could offer me. I understand you want it to be perfect but I honestly feel more comfortable eating noodles at a stall than in a fancy restaurant that I have to get glares every time I laugh too loud. This IS perfect, Hyung.”‌
Seokjin looked back down at his bowl, “…If I would’ve known you were this cheap I would’ve had a picnic at the park.”‌ He grumbled.
“CAN WE!?”‌
Seokjin shook his head at me, a disapproving look on his face.
"I make a KILLER lemonade!"‌ I added with a proud smile.
I‌ saw Seokjin try to hold back a smile, "We'll have a picnic date next time."‌ He confirmed, lifting up a bundle of noodles.
We heard a clatter to the side of us. We whipped our heads to look towards the woman. She had dropped a spoon and looked a little... surprised?
"Ma'am, are you okay?"‌ I asked softly.
Seokjin only frowned, "Yes, we're on a date. I've even seen him without a shirt and I liked it."‌
My head snapped over to look at Seokjin, "Hyung!"
"We're planning on going home together,"‌ Seokjin added to my horror.
"OKAY!THANKYOUSOMUCHFORTHEMEALWE'REGOINGTOGONOW!" I yelled in one breath, frantically trying to pull my wallet out of my pocket.
"He even has a son so we don't need to adopt. We're going to raise a CHILD. TWO MEN."
"HYUNGSTOPTALKING!" I slammed the money on the table, just knowing I gave more money than was needed.
My face was way too hot and my brain was far too scattered to deal with what Seokjin just did.
I grabbed his hand and began to try to yank him away. It was useless. The man didn't budge.
"I'm going to use the belt tonight because he made me lose an argument."‌
World.
Just open up and take me now.
It wasn't just the woman who was staring now, it was others around the small market as well. I‌ wanted to melt into the floor.
“Hyung…”‌I‌ whispered, “If we leave now I’ll buy you cake.”
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The ride and stroll home was by far my favorite part of the date. Even though I had to buy Seokjin a pretty expensive slice of cake –I’ve never seen someone shove a whole slice of strawberry cake in their mouth– we still talked the whole way home. Embarrassing stories of our childhoods, who our friends were and everything in between. It was amazing until the dreaded topic was brought up.
“What about Junseok? Does he talk to his mother?”‌
Fuck.
I looked down at my feet as we walked, thinking over my works. I tried to figure out how I was going to tell this story without being biased or have Seokjin thing badly of Hyejin.
Seokjin must have thought I didn’t want to tell him, “You don’t have to tell me if it’s too sore of a subject…”‌ He added, a little disappointed.
“It’s not that!”‌ I‌ quickly said, looking up as fast as I spoke.
I let out an awkward laugh from my outburst, “It’s just that I‌ don’t know how to really tell the story in a neutral or fair way. I only know one side of the story so it’s a little complicated.”‌
Seokjin let out a sigh. He reached over to grab my hand and dragged me over to some stairs close by. He sat down and patted beside him, “This sounds like it will take a while, so start from the beginning. We have the time.”‌
I looked down at him, shaking my head, “You just want to torture my best friend.”‌
“Looking after that well-behaved, future child of mine, is not torture.”‌ I raised an eyebrow.
“Future child of yours?”‌
“Just sit down and spill.”‌
I sighed, and plopped down next to him, this was going to be hard explaining this to someone who didn’t know Hyejin.
“I used to have two best friends. Jeongguk, and Hyejin. Hyejin was a girl and she kinda stuck around us,” I‌ began, trying to keep my eyes dead ahead so I wouldn’t have to look into his eyes. I‌ was almost afraid he would judge me.
“Jeongguk was in sports and had two other friends, Jimin and Taehyung. So sometimes Jeongguk and I couldn’t hang out. I‌ wasn’t mad about it, I mean I‌ didn’t expect him to not have other friends. But Hyejin made it seem like it was like he committed treason,”‌ I‌ scoffed at the ridiculousness, “She kept saying ‘if he’s having fun so should we’.”‌ I‌ mocked her stupid voice.
I could see Seokjin press his lips together to hold back laughter. I‌ sighed and began to rub my hands on my thighs nervously.
“I‌ was an art student. I‌ was trying to keep my grades above average and I didn’t care about having fun. But Hyejin kept going on and on and I knew that she wouldn’t stop until I gave in and went with her at least once. So I did. ” I‌ could feel my heart speed up at the thought of finishing the stupid story that seemed to affect me years later.
“Jimin had told me once that Hyejin was giving me heart eyes. I‌ told him she was our childhood friend, so he was wrong. Jeongguk and I talked about how she seemed to be the most unconvinced when I‌ came out, but I was too idiotic to think she would just let it go.”‌ I could feel anger begin to build and sting the back of my eyes.
“So sure enough, I‌ got black-out drunk and wandered upstairs. I just wanted to pass out and have someone drag me home in the morning. I‌ remember diving onto the bed and texting Jeongguk. I‌ remember Hyejin coming into the room and asking if I was plastered. I‌ remember saying something stupid like ‘I’m not plaster, I’m a person.’. I‌ remember her flipping me over and complaining about taking me home. I just remember her hovering over me. I‌ thought she was just going to complain more and take me home like a decent fucking human being would.”‌I nearly growled.
Seokjin scooted closer to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. He pulled me close but said nothing, allowing me to continue.
“The last thing I‌ remember was her stupid fucking face hovering over me. I‌ woke up next to her. Being the idiot I was, I‌ woke her up and told her we would keep it a secret. I‌ dumbly thought she was as wasted as me and we just happened to hook up. We didn’t talk about it and I told her that if she brought it up, we wouldn’t be friends anymore.”‌ Even the summarized version made my blood boil.
“A few weeks later, she called in sick to school. When Jeongguk and I called in to check up on her, we were yelled at by her mom. Well… I‌ was yelled at by her mom. I‌ was called a low-life player and a bunch of other stupid shit. When I asked her what the hell her problem was, she told me Hyejin was pregnant.”‌
“I had to explain to Jeongguk what happened. Of course, Jeongguk was pissed. My family wasn’t very stable financially. But Hyejin’s family was. I had to explain to my parents. They weren’t as hard on me as they could’ve been, but they were disappointed. Jeongguk was the first to say she did it on purpose.”
“I believe him.”‌ Seokjin’s voice was barely above a whisper.
“I‌ do too. I tried to get a job, I‌ mean I was going to have a kid. So I stopped taking school as seriously. I figured if I‌ passed just above the bar it would be enough for art school. Hyejin kept telling me that being a parent was a full-time thing. She wasn’t going to let me go to art school. I told her that I WAS going. There were plenty of fathers in college! I‌ tried damn hard to get above the bar while working. It’s was 8 months of hell with Hyejin. Jeongguk would invite me to hang out with him and his friends, only for Hyejin to somehow find us and tell off Jimin like he was trying to steal me away. I‌ told her to cut it out, only for her to tell me I was hers until the baby was born. Jeong–”‌
“Bitch.”‌ I choked on air.
Seokjin patted my back as I coughed and sputtered, “Are you okay!?”‌ He questioned, worry written all over his face. My choking turned into laughter as I leaned onto Seokjin’s lap.
“What!? I’m sorry, but that’s crazy stalker level bitchery!”‌ He defended, only causing me to laugh more. Literal tears.
I felt Seokjin’s fingers comb through my hair as he let out small laughs of his own, waiting for me to calm down.
It wasn’t so bad in Seokjin’s lap. It was warm and comforting. Just what I needed for the finale of the horror story. My laughter died down. He didn’t stop playing with my hair as my breath evened out.
“Jeongguk was going to move here. But he stayed until Junseok was born.” I‌ said softly.
I rubbed my face more against his thigh, “That was nice of him.”‌Seokjin’s voice was feather-light.
“She left us.”‌ I‌ stated.
Seokjin’s fingers froze.
“Her parents were insisting I should marry her. My parents would fight back. A few weeks before Junseok was born, her parents put us in an apartment to live together. My mother hated it. It was pretty high-end. A few days before Junseok was born, Hyejin and I got into a fight about us getting married. I wasn’t going to do it. I would support her and my child. I‌ would make sure he grew up right, but I wasn’t going to trap myself in a loveless marriage. So when Junseok was born. She ignored me almost the whole time. Only waking up to feed him then going back to bed. Jimin, Taehyung, and Jeongguk were more excited to see him than she was. It was no surprise that as soon as she was able to walk around, she packed her things, handed me Junseok and left everything to me.”‌
I felt wet hit my cheek.
After a moment of confusion, I looked up at Seokjin. His eyes were red, tears beginning to streak down his cheeks.
I‌ quickly sat up to cup his face, “Why are you crying?”‌ I asked, trying to wipe away as many tears as I would.
“He’s such a great son. Why wouldn’t she just give him a chance?‌!” I’ve never seen him so hurt and angry.
I let out a sigh, “She came back last year. She tried to act like nothing happened. She just kept coming over and saying I was the problem for not giving her a chance. He knows her as his aunt, which creeps me out. So I moved so she would leave us alone. She just knows I’m in Seoul.”‌ I sagged my shoulders and dropped my hands to his thighs.
“Well she can suck my ass he’s my son now.”‌
“WHY IS EVERYONE TRYING TO CLAIM MY SON??” I‌ demanded.
Seokjin chuckled, “I’m telling you, he’s a great boy. You did perfect.”‌ His voice was soft and comforting.
He placed his hand in my hair to ruffle it, “You and your son are perfect for me.”‌
He’s face was still blotched red. His eyes shined with the light and his nose was as red as his ears. He was beautiful. It hurt to see him cry, but I couldn’t help the fondness that built in my chest.
“You’re perfect for us too.”‌ I‌ whispered.
His eyes turned into crescents as his smile grew.
“You’re even handsome when you cry.”‌ I‌ smirked.
“Yah!”‌ The switch flipped.
Seokjin drew back to smack the back of my head, “I’m starting to think you only want me around for my looks!”‌
“That’s not true!” I rubbed the back of my head with a pout, “I keep you around because you cook and make dad jokes.”‌
“…Do you appreciate them?”‌
“Very much so.”‌
“…Then I will continue to stay.”‌
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Seokjin and I walked into the apartment building hand-in-hand. I would occasionally swing our hands, being the idiot I‌ was. Seokjin had a thing for winking at people who stared, which I had to scold him for.
Upon exiting the elevator, Seokjin turned to me, “How about I hang out at your apar-”‌
A‌ loud shriek cut Seokjin off. Making us both jump and look down the hall.
“JUNSEOK GIVE ME THE BASKET OF TOWELS!!!”‌ I could hear Jeongguk’s muffled yelling from in the apartment.
“SECRET AGENT SEOK WILL USE THEM TO ESCAPE THE EVIL VILLAIN!”‌
“YOU USE THEM TO CLIMB OUT THE WINDOW AND I WILL GRAB SCIS- STOP TYING THEM TOGETHER YOUR FATHER WILL KILL ME!”‌
I let out a deep sigh, turning to Seokjin, “You still sure he’s a good son?”‌
Seokjin gave me a big smile, “He’s tormenting Jeongguk. He’s the best son.”‌
I‌ could hear Junseok scream.
“SCREAM ALL YOU WANT! YOU CAN’T GO OUT THE WINDOW!!!”‌
Seokjin let out a sigh of his own, his hand tightened around mine, “Let’s go handle our son, shall we?”‌
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kaffeinic · 5 years ago
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Caffeinic | Bang Chan
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | Epilogue
Pairing: Reader x Barista!Bang Chan
Genre: Neutral // Angst Maybe? // Romance
Warnings: None
Preamble: You’ve been going to the same coffee shop for the past four years. You’ve ordered the same thing almost every single day, and you never, ever skip on that part of your morning. So, when Mrs. Park hired a new barista and the once serene café was suddenly flooded with people every second of the day, you were less than thrilled.
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You stood outside of the cafe’s entrance, debating whether or not to enter. It has been two days since the date, and you had been actively avoiding the building. Unfortunately, you just ran out of coffee and really, really wanted the coffee that’s made here. You crossed your fingers, hoping that Mrs. Park was manning the floor this evening.
You flinched when the bell above the door trilled as you entered, hoping it didn’t draw any unwanted attention. You peeked at the work station, checking for any signs that Chan was in today. You cursed yourself for never having asked what his schedule was. You only saw Mrs. Park, who frowned when she saw you.
“Y/n, it’s been a while. Are you alright?” She asked, placing a mug on the counter. You nodded and smiled.
“Yeah, of course.” You replied. She cocked an eyebrow, scoffing.
“You are most definitely not fine, and I don’t appreciate being lied to.” She said, wagging a finger in your direction. Your eyes widened as you stopped in your tracks. “You haven’t been in for days and Chan has never looked more depressed.” Mrs. Park said. You looked down.
“It’s fine, I just didn’t want to come in.” You said. You weren’t lying.
“Then tell me why.” She said. You placed your bag on the bar counter, sliding into a seat.
“I really don’t think it’s my place to say.” You said. She looked down and laughed a little.
“That’s exactly what Chan told me.” She explained. “Tell me what happened.” You hung your head low.
“We just fought.” You finally said. She squinted at you, trying to find any indication whether what you said was true or not.
“Ah, I see.” She said, turning. She had grabbed the mug and hung it up behind her. “I was afraid this would happen.” She mumbled.
“Afraid what would happen?”
“That girl would do something to you two.” She said. “She seemed like trouble.” You let out a sigh.
“It wasn’t her. Chan lied to me.” You said. “Or, at least he broke a promise, which is kind of like lying.” You corrected yourself. Mrs. Park frowned.
“What did he promise you?” She asked.
“I really shouldn’t get into it.” You said. “It’s not fair for me to tell everyone about something like this.” You explained. She hummed and nodded, looking down.
“I had such high hopes for you two.” She said. “What would you like to order today, dear?” She asked. You told her your order, pulling out your textbook. You flipped through the pages, not really paying much attention to what they said. You heard the bell ring, signaling you that there was a new customer. You looked up to see Junseok.
“Hey, Y/n~!” He said, waving. He made his way over to you, smiling. “How’ve you been feeling?”
“So-so. What about you?” You said. He frowned, but understood.
“I’m doing alright, thanks. Can I sit here?” He pointed to the stool next to you. You hummed and smiled.
“Of course.”
He took his seat, placing his book bag on the counter next to yours. “I have a lot of studying to do.” He said. You could see three textbooks protruding from the open end of his bag. He wasn’t exaggerating.
“I felt that.” You said, laughing a little. “Which classes?” You asked.
“Anatomy, calculus, and biology.” He said. You raised a brow.
“Are you a medical major?” You asked. He nodded.
“Yeah. It’s always been a passion for me. What about you?” He asked.
“I haven’t decided yet.” You explained, sighing. “I really should, though.” Junseok chuckled at your exasperation.
“Take your time.” He said. You smiled at his kindness, nodding.
“Alright.” You heard footsteps coming from the employee room, looking up to see a very tired-looking Chan. He ran a hand through his locks, frowning.
“I’m ready to take over. You can go now, Mrs. Par-” He stopped in his tracks when he saw you.
“Thank you, Chan. I’ll see you in a few hours.” Mrs. Park briskly walked past all of you and to the stairs, smiling devilishly. Chan slowly walked over to the both of you, looking at Junseok.
“Would you like something to drink?” He asked. You could faintly see his teeth grit while he spoke. Junseok shook his head.
“I think I’m good for now, thanks bro.” He said.
“You can’t be here if you don’t order anything.” Chan’s voice had become lower, as if he was warning Junseok about something. It took a moment, but then the situation hit you; He was jealous. You rolled your eyes.
“I’ve been here a lot without ordering anything, and the café is pretty much empty. I think he’s fine, Chan.” You said, looking back down at your textbook. You scribbled a note and looked over to Junseok, smiling. He returned the gesture.
“I can order something if you want. It’s not a big deal.” He said. Chan huffed, whipping out a notepad.
“What can I get you?” He asked.
“I think I’ll get a macchiato.” Junseok said. “It’s been a while.” Chan nodded and scribbled the order down, turning away to brew Junseok’s coffee. You glanced between the two boys and sighed softly. It was going to be a long day.
The next few minutes passed peacefully, you and Junseok reading your textbooks and discussing, while Chan prepared the macchiato. The café received no new customers in that time, which you were thankful for. You sighed softly and closed your book.
“I think I need a break.” You admitted. Junseok looked up at you from his textbook, which had a large picture of what you could only imagine was some part of the human body. He nodded.
“I could use one, too.” He said. “Do you want me to take you home?” He asked. You shook your head.
“I’m fine. I think I can get there myself. It’s nice out.” You said. “I might want some more coffee before I leave. You can go if you want.” He hummed.
“Alright. Shoot me a text if you change your mind about that ride.” He said, gathering his things. You nodded and watched him exit the café.
“He didn’t even drink his coffee...” Chan muttered to himself as he took the half-full mug. You pursed your lips.
“I don’t always drink my coffee.” You said. “Just because he’s my friend doesn’t mean he can’t be yours.” Chan scoffed.
“He’s made it very clear he wants to be more than friends with you.” He said.
“I’ve made it clear that I don’t.” You retorted. Chan’s gaze never found yours throughout the entire conversation. “You-” You stuttered. “You don’t get to be mad at me.” You said. This time, he looked at you.
“I’m not mad at you.”
“You also don’t get to dictate who I spend my time with. Treating Junseok like crap isn’t going to help you.”
“I’m-” He said. “I’m not trying to.” He let out an exasperated sigh. “Is now a good time for you to let me explain?” He asked. You shook your head.
“You admitted to kissing someone after you told me you wouldn’t do anything like that with other people. I don’t want to hear it. No explanation is going to help you.” You said. He frowned and nodded.
“I’ll try again later.”
Most of the next twenty minutes were spent with the occasional customer coming in, the sound of the coffee grinder going off every few minutes, and the smell of mixed colognes and perfumes irritating your senses. You began get up after your umpteenth cup of coffee, but stopped.
“Chan?” You said. He perked up and looked in your direction. “I’ll let you try to explain.” You couldn’t leave what both of you had without at least letting him try to explain the situation. He smiled weakly and nodded.
“I had gone back to the party after bringing you home, mostly to hang out with Junseok.” He began. “We were messing around, watching all of the drunk people being idiots. One of them came up to me - I don’t even know her name - and just laid one on me. Apparently, they were playing some hybrid of spin the bottle and truth or dare, and she was dared to kiss someone in the room.” He looked at you and frowned. “That person was me. I pushed her away the second it happened, I swear.” He said. You looked at him, contemplating how to feel.
If he was telling the truth, then it’s more than likely that Seoyeon used the incident to split you two up. If he’s lying, which people aren’t unknown to do, then you’d just be falling into the arms of a playboy. You hummed, and nodded.
“Thanks for telling me, but I need to just think about it for a while.” You said. Chan nodded in understanding.
“Take all the time you need.” He said. “In the meantime, I’ll try to find a way to prove it.” He paused. “Why didn’t Junseok tell you?” He asked.
“I never told him about it.” You admitted. Chan raised a brow.
“I thought for sure that you would have told him.”
“It’s not my place to tell everyone about things that happen between us.” You explained. “Even if I’m hurting.” Chan’s gaze softened.
“I get it.” He said. “Will I see you tomorrow?” He asked.
“I don’t know.” You told him. He looked at his hands and grabbed a wet mug.
“Alright.” He said.
~
I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I’ve been getting lots of positive feedback for Caffeinic and it truly makes me so happy to see how much you all enjoy this! Also, wow, we just hit double digits for the chapter count! Let’s have a party! 😂 Let me know if you would like to be put on my Taglist. As always, if you enjoyed, please drop a like and reblog for your friends to read! Have a nice day~~
* DISCLAIMER: I do not own any gifs/photos used in this post. I do own the written content. Do NOT repost/edit. *
🏷 @a-toxic-galaxy • @hoshithehamster • @woo-for-woojin • @lovely-little-lesbib • @ethereal-chanracha • @midnatwlp • @joohowdy • @ckyunwon • @yeollliee • @aquietkerfuffle
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sanfrancisco101-rp · 4 years ago
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MEET YOUR NEIGHBOUR @sfc_junseok!
NOME: Kim Junseok Andy. DATA DE NASCIMENTO/IDADE: 15 de Setembro de 1993 / 27 anos. NACIONALIDADE: Estados Unidos. ETNIA: Coreano. GÊNERO: Masculino. ORIENTAÇÃO SEXUAL: Bissexual. OCUPAÇÃO: Vendedor na Pink Bunny House. APARTAMENTO: Apartamento 502. USER NO TWITTER: @sfc_junseok CARRD: https://0365247.carrd.co/
Morador do San Francisco 101 desde 2015.
PERSONALIDADE: Costuma sempre procurar explicações lógicas para qualquer coisa que lhe envolve ou que o interesse. Seja pela criação ou pelo fato de sua personalidade ser genuinamente assim, por vezes tende a analisar demais e precisa se conter para não ser tão crítico. Entretanto, Junseok ainda é uma pessoa flexível e adaptável — desde que a situação faça algum sentido. Longe de ser uma borboleta social, mas ainda faz o seu melhor para lidar com as pessoas ou, ao menos, não deixar visível o quão introvertido ele realmente é. Não durante o expediente, ao menos.
HISTÓRIA: A história de Junseok começa como a história de qualquer outro coreano-americano. De fato, nada sobre o começo de sua vida destoava significativamente dos demais — a começar pela imigração de seus pais da Coreia do Sul até os Estados Unidos em busca de melhores condições de vida e parando em uma cidadezinha chamada Cerritos, qual começava a se tornar uma escolha popular entre os asiáticos que desejavam correr atrás do famoso sonho americano. Foi ali que fizeram uma renda com uma papelaria comum e tiveram seus três filhos, sendo Andy o caçula da família.
Sua infância e adolescência não foi muito diferente dos outros descendentes que conhecia. Como era de se esperar, havia toda aquela pressão consequente de uma educação rígida. E com seus irmãos mais velhos caminhando na exata direção que seus pais tanto desejavam, a única maneira de ser perdoado por não escolher cursar direito ou medicina seria apenas se ele decidisse estudar administração ou economia. E em Harvard ou Yale, lógico, porque a filha do primo que é cunhado da vizinha conseguiu uma vaga, então por que ele não conseguiria também? Era simples assim. Bastava tirar a nota máxima em todos os SATs e ter um currículo tão impecável de modo que a sua ficha fosse praticamente irrecusável. Fácil.
Foi mais ou menos na metade de um curso de engenharia de uma outra faculdade que a estafa atingiu o seu limite e Junseok abandonou completamente todas as expectativas que tinham sobre si, junto de vários planos que nunca foram realmente seus. Uma atitude meio tardia, talvez, mas tudo valeria a pena se isso significasse poder tomar as rédeas da própria vida. … Valeria a pena em partes, no caso. E talvez fosse seguro dizer que não é muito recomendável tomar grandes decisões assim quando se está de cabeça quente e frustrado — ou ao menos era isso o que se passava em sua mente quando o rapaz decidiu trancar a faculdade e mudar-se de súbito para a casa de um amigo em uma outra cidade a horas de distância, em São Francisco, carregando nada além de uma mala com suas roupas e documentos.
E também era isso o que havia pensado quando escolheu o seu primeiro emprego, seja para comprovar a sua rebeldia, por ser próximo de seu novo lar, ou por simplesmente não ter pesquisado outros lugares antes disso devido a pressa.
Todas as pessoas que viam Andy parado atrás da caixa registradora ou nos corredores da Pink Bunny House tinham uma opinião unânime: ele não parecia se encaixar ali. E, de fato, era visível em seu rosto pelo menos durante os primeiros meses o quão perdido ele se sentia naquele ambiente. Após tanto tempo com o rosto afundado em livros e com uma vida social limitada, era de se esperar que ele não tivesse tantas experiências quanto um jovem adulto comum, ainda mais na área sexual. O que o havia ajudado durante o processo era a sua facilidade em memorizar (provavelmente uma habilidade adquirida devida à educação desde muito novo); e desde que encarasse as descrições de cada item e os relatos desnecessariamente detalhados como apenas uma matéria a ser estudada, não era tão absurda assim a ideia de analisar as informações e assim decidir como aplicá-las na forma de diferentes conselhos ou sugestões para os diversos visitantes da loja. Um perfeito “nerd” até mesmo nas mais estranhas das situações.
Apesar de toda a confusão no início de seu emprego, o trabalho não era de todo tão mau. Os clientes que costumavam ir a loja com frequência tinham a cabeça mais aberta que a maioria e o ambiente não abria espaço para julgamentos, salvo pelos comentários humorados de alguns visitantes sobre como Andy não possuía a típica aparência ou até mesmo presença de um funcionário do ramo. E ainda que sua experiência naquela área tivesse aumentado aos pouquinhos, principalmente após ter se mudado para o seu próprio apartamento; todos ali acreditavam que nada no mundo o faria parar de gaguejar ou balbuciar algo ininteligível toda vez que alguém insistisse em questionar a sua opinião pessoal sobre algo. Mas também deveria ser aquela característica, talvez, que pela primeira vez na vida o tornava diferente das outras pessoas ao seu redor.
PLOTS DE INTERESSE: Angst; Fluff; General; Crack; Romance; Smut; Squick. FACECLAIM: Jae.
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mgnifiqueyoo · 2 months ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.10 - "ΝΥΚΤΕΡΙΝΟΣ." Word Count: 2,191
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───── ❝ nocturnal. ❞ ─────
My eyes shifted from side to side, constantly checking if there was someone still awake – well, more specifically, someone I knew. 
It was four in the morning and I had just woken up from my three-hour nap, which made the other two believe that I had already fallen asleep. Was I smart for doing that? Maybe but god, that painful headache was a horrible aftermath. But was it my fault that I couldn't stop myself from feeling tempted to know more? Okay, maybe but that's not the point.
The feeling was uncontrollable. It was like a rope was tightened around my waist, dragging me into a cave of untold stories. A room of forgotten memories. 
And I just can't bear standing here, doing nothing even if I already knew that he was… not alright.
My hand was balled into a fist as it hovered above the door of his room, resulting in me gulping as I braced myself before letting my knuckles lightly hit the door's surface. For a while, I stood there, wondering if my choices were even worth doing as the door soon opened, revealing him in another all-black outfit. 
This time, he actually looked like he was about to take a rest and not on a runway.
“Hm? Hey, there.” Junseok was acting weirdly relaxed as if nothing had happened earlier, causing me to slightly frown, which made him a bit ashamed of it. The door was quickly opened wider, allowing me to come in as I saw how organized his room was.
Something far from mine.
Well, it wasn't just the organization of his belongings that I was impressed at but also the extra furniture he had; like porcelain figures and such.
All of it looked amazing.
Turning around to look back at him, Junseok made his way to pull the chair next to his desk forward as he later sat on the edge of his bed. 
“You know why I'm here,” I told him, gaining a nod from him as I sat on the chair he pulled out, resting my arms over the desk as I leaned my chin over my knuckles. It was quiet and the two of us were equally awkward around each other. 
Well, who wouldn't? The topic was too surreal for me to understand in one day. 
But then, it was real. “How were you… found?” I asked, nervous about how he'd answer me as he took a deep breath, probably feeling the same way as I did. 
“All I remember was I was laying down on the shore and the council was looking down at me… Well, the representatives of the Nocturnal realm.” He gave a name for the place he's stayed at and I nod, letting out a hum as a sign for him to continue. “It happened in Crete... in Greece. I think it was cold that night because of the storm.”
Oh, I should've been a lot more prepared to hear that from him. “And listen, I don't have any memories except for what I told the council that night.” He emphasized, which made my brows furrow as I leaned in forward in curiosity. Well, isn't it like going back to school all over again? Thankfully, he's now in a more calmed position.
"What was it?” I questioned, pursing my lips shut.
“That I wanted to protect you,” Junseok answered in a tone as if it was obvious to him. “That I wanted to keep a girl named Y/N safe.”
I was out of words, shoulders slouched as if I wanted to hide from everything. I was hurt to know that it was the last thing Junseok said. 
That it was the last thing he said when he was still my best friend. “I didn't even know who you are but now, I know why my past self would want to do that,” Junseok said right after, having a small yet noticeable smile on his face.
Maybe I left a bizarre impression on him. That's for sure.
“Well, what happened next?” I asked a question quickly, shoulders rising up as I felt a bit shy to listen to him say that. 
Well, maybe not just a bit since I changed the topic. “No, wait. Do you feel good about yourself?” Junseok was still on that topic, shifting himself closer to me as his eyes glistened under the dimmed light of his room, his dimples showing again in a matter of seconds. 
“Not that much,” I muttered back, causing him to chuckle.
“I know you do but sure, let's not talk about that.” He teased, leaning back as he even took the pillow next to him, hugging it close to himself. “What happened next was that I was brought to the realm and training started soon,” he answered, still relaxed as if it was not a big deal for him to tell me almost everything about the past he kept from me.
Not for long, though. “Was I really an athlete in the past?” Junseok asked, scrunching his nose and furrowing his brows, not having a single clue about what he really was like in the past. 
And there was a glimpse of one of his competitions, where he successfully took down someone from a different academy. 
A time when everything's not too complicated.
“Yeah, you were… and you were great,” I told him with full honesty as he looked into my eyes as if he could see how I felt. 
I don't know exactly how I am feeling while talking to someone who died and was brought back to life for a new purpose but I could say that I was holding back a lot of my emotions. “That's what they said about me too,” Junseok said, breathing deeply before looking somewhere else as he probably wondered how his life was before that trip. 
“They said I was physically fit for the thing I have to do.” He continued, having a blunt smile across his face as I did the same to him. For some reason, it was upsetting yet comforting to talk to him like this. 
Where we were both honest with each other. “And every day, I kept on thinking about meeting you and I didn't know it was going to happen so soon,” Junseok revealed, breathing out in relief as he probably felt free.
For the first time, maybe?
Junseok then rests his chin on top of the pillow he's been hugging tightly, still breathing deeply. “Why did you say those things, then? You know, those words hurt.” I joked, which half of it wasn't as the boy had a gloomy look on his face. The experience of someone I once loved suddenly acting as a rude stranger to me was so painful that I didn't know whether to give up or not. 
I even had to talk it out with Seunghwan to collect myself.
“Because I didn't want you to be involved… My life- This mission... It's dangerous for you,” he said, truthfully as he couldn't even look at me anymore. I didn't know what he felt but now that I understood why he had to do it, I just hope he didn't feel so bad about himself. He did it for a reason that I never expected.
I actually thought he only did it for fun. 
“But now, I am involved and you can’t just not include me here, you know?” I shrugged, giving him a smile as he sighed, shaking his head right after. “If you could do things like that, then is it possible for you to teach me your ways? How can I protect myself?”
The moment I asked him that question, his face was full of nothing but terror as he pointed his finger at me. “No, you are not learning anything. Leave that thing to me. That’s my mission. That’s partially why I’m here.” He warned, his brows arched and his teeth gritted tightly as I felt my back lower down, underwhelmed. 
“But I don't want you to worry about my safety all the time!” I fought back.
Junseok shushed me, reminding me that it was already almost five in the morning as he didn't want to get any complaints from the students sleeping in the rooms next to his.
“Come on, wouldn't it be better for me? I mean, you do want to keep me safe…” I wasn't planning to give up easily on him as he took in a deep breath, his eyes slightly closed and his jaw tensed up. 
He was probably trying to control his temper, slowly opening his eyes afterward as he rolled them at me. “Well, aren't you right about that?” His sarcasm never failed to gloss over his words, resulting in me winking at him in satisfaction.
Junseok lets out another sigh as he gets up from the edge of his bed, making his way behind me as he takes both of my wrists in his hands carefully. “I want you to close your eyes,” He whispers softly, sending shivers down my spine yet I choose to ignore it, closing my eyes shut as quickly as possible. 
It was an odd experience. “Think of a weapon. Any weapon of your choice.”
And I thought of a weapon that was something simpler. Well, I don't know a thing about guns or knives so I wouldn't know how to think of those. 
So, I ended up with a bow and an arrow.
“Then, visualize the darkest place you've ever been in.”
When he told me that, I had no idea what he meant as I fought the urge to ask him to clear it all up for me. No, of course, I haven't been in any dark places except for Rakwon's party but if he was talking about it metaphorically, I could name a few.
But there was one situation that I thought was the darkest place I've ever been in.
It was the day after the ship sank and I was completely clueless over what had happened the night before. I remembered how I went outside of my bedroom, expecting my parents to be working as usual. 
I thought that I'd see my father go inside the living room with a white towel on his shoulder and his favorite red cap on top of his head – to keep away from the heat outside, where he always repaired the car engines of the neighbors. That day, I thought I'd see my mother in the kitchen, waiting for another batch of cookies to bake as she'd normally check her ten-year-old wristwatch, which was given to her by Dad.
But it was far from that.
They were seated in the living room, both of their heads bowed down as the younger me even asked if Junseok had sent me a text because every night, my parents would take my phone from me so that I could just sleep.
One text was all I needed just to know if he was safe. 
“Sweetheart, we need to tell you something.” My mother was quick to stop me from asking any more questions as she wanted me to sit between the two of them. 
“What’s going on?” I asked, still not catching up on the sorrow they've felt.
“We were contacted by the school and they told us that… Junseok and his family drowned from the trip.”
I was broken. So numb and bitter over it that there were no tears falling down my face. 
I felt angry. Disgusted at myself for doing nothing at all. As far as I could tell, that was the darkest place I've ever been in as Junseok might've noticed how I breathed silently like I was the ghost in his room.
“Open your eyes,” Junseok said as I did, seeing a form of the bow and arrow lying on both my palms. 
I was taken aback by the sight of it. Black mist swaying in different directions like air yet managing to have the image of a bow and an arrow. “Woah.” I was amazed by it, fixated on the arrow's stem that was a little intertwined with the bow's string.
“But don't linger too much in the darkness,” He suddenly spoke with a louder voice, causing me to flinch in shock as the weapon disappeared from my grasp – leaving only his hands wrapped around my wrists. “Use it for safety… Not for the downfall of others.” He reminded me once more, later letting go of my wrists as he sat on the edge of the bed, facing me again but this time, he looked a lot more comfortable around me. 
“So, we're actually friends now, huh?” Junseok casually commented as I snickered at him. 
A whole new world yet still the same person.
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mgnifiqueyoo · 26 days ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.13 - "ΤΟ ΣΥΜΒΟΥΛΙΟ." Word Count: 2,240
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───── ❝ oh junseok's perspective: the council. ❞ ─────
It wasn't safe for me anymore.
It just wasn't safe for me to sit around the university, playing pretend.
The cases reported through the news were getting a lot worse. Frequent crimes such as robberies and murders were rampant. The council told me that this place was my destination – that I could hunt down the Vanguard here in Seoul, especially at a place where there were so many people living at once.
The problem with searching for this menace was that his face was never uncovered, even from past shadows like me. All they knew was that this man caused chaos and would choose anyone as his vessel.
Not a lot about that was even detailed and he had been around for centuries, whispering into the ears of provoked civilians who could've done something good for humanity.
Instead, they ruin it. The Vanguard is truly a living false hope. Nothing but a fraud to everyone else. I knew I had to find him and stop him.
And if I fail, I wouldn't know what it's like to have a life out of the shadows.
I wouldn't know what it's like to remember… her.
She sat two rows below mine, tapping the end of her pen repeatedly onto the flat, wooden surface of the desk as I watched her from afar. “Well, someone's busy.” Rakwon pointed out with a loud yet blunt-sounding voice, causing me to shudder in surprise as I turned to look back at him.
“Don't tell me that's actually your type…” Junmin's tone was also blunt but it had some hint of snarkiness in it – something that the other one couldn't do.
Once again, I pretended to laugh with them, continuing to play along even if I was opposed to their opinions of her. I could agree that she wasn't quite the best out of everyone I've met. A little mediocre at first, maybe? But she's got some serious charms. I don't know why I found it simply charming whenever she started using her head over some task.
I do like her.
I meant the way she thinks. I like it.
And I felt completely horrified when I watched her begin forming conclusions over the most meaningless things I told her noisy, happy-go-lucky friend.
What was his name again? Seunghwan Jeong? Ah, he's irritating. I don't like seeing him around her too much. He's overly friendly and I just couldn't stand people like him.
Although, even if I disliked him, I realized that I should've done better.
I could've apologized to her. I knew how she didn't like to hear me speak that way about her – blabbering how much I hated her existence when the truth was far from it. Can too much protectiveness hurt someone? I don't know. I've never experienced having a genuine friend before.
Well, I may have but short descriptions of who I was in the past weren't enough for me to know anything as good as a normal person could. After all, I still wasn't him.
Yet for me to turn back into him again, I have to catch the Vanguard – whoever that asshole is.
Right after classes ended, I sneaked into the deepest corners of the university with no one around as it was time for me to share my reports with the council again. I felt my body collide with one of the shadowed corners of the walls, letting myself sink into the darkest realm as if thick air had pulled me into a welcoming embrace.
To me, it was a home that wasn't so sweet but also it was the only place I've ever known. A sense of familiarity in such darkness can be a little unusual but I'm not normal.
And I both love and hate to be that way.
There was no morning sun in Skia as the moon was its only source of light. Ghostly shadows dressed in cloaks walked around the streets, feet hovering over the grounds as they minded their own business. Despite being known for all things that meant misery, the realm was a great place to stay in, especially if I didn't want to deal with a lot of people.
Sure, sometimes, it felt lonely to be here but I'd rather be alone than to be around the wrong people.
But my perspective changed a bit when I made a friend.
The beauty of friendship is so addictive that I just couldn't get my head out of it.
“Junseok? Well, you're here early.” I heard a familiar voice call me as I turned around, seeing Bin already dressed up for the meeting tonight – or should I say that the meeting was today? Time in Skia was a headache. No mornings, just nights yet you still have to be on time. Honestly, it was worse than having to mingle with the students from IST.
I walked towards him, summoning a cloak at the same time as it covered the upper half of my face. “I thought you'd take a long time talking to her.” Bin teased as I smiled anyway even if it wasn't too funny.
Does he know I messed up? I think he does.
“Well, you also talked to her earlier too, didn't you?” I asked back, the question hinting at both sarcasm and humor as he chuckled in response.
“Not as long as you would apparently,” Bin replied, relaxed but giddy at the same time.
“I guess that's fair,” I admitted, which made us both snicker.
Looking down, I noticed how loose my tie was, leading me to fix it right away, later walking the streets of Skia next to him.
Bin was more of a companion rather than a genuine friend but I'd never say that he wasn't a part of me. Before I came here, he was already in the training grounds right below the temple, where the rest of the council stayed. I learned that he was found injured by a wild bear in a camping site when he was little, almost dead when the council had seen him.
I also learned that he was left for dead too. His parents have left him in the woods, deciding that they didn't want to raise him anymore. The plan was disguised as a fun family gathering but it wasn't.
Practically, he was raised by the head of the council, Sangyeon Lee.
Of course, I remembered how he was levitating from the dusted tiles of the temple, eyes closed as he concentrated on the fine line between inner peace and bitterness. I guess despair was a part of garnering power. Are our weaknesses becoming the source of it, maybe?
But unlike him, I was still hoping to learn more about who I really was and I think that's why the council made that deal with me.
To hand them the Vanguard so that they could hand me my memories back.
It's a simple deal but it's so complicated to find him and bring him to the temple.
“Is there any progress with the mission, Junseok?” The head of the council asked as I kept my head down on the ground, on my knees in front of the rest of them as the other shadows watched me come up with an answer. They had high expectations for me, considering how many times they've mentioned how I was perfect for the job.
But until now, it was almost impossible to succeed.
“Not a lot,” I uttered, which made a few of them gasp. They shouldn't have expected so much from me because I couldn't even see myself failing yet I'm stuck with failed attempts. “It was only a few interactions with him. I've had several suspicions over who he is residing in at the university but I was… left with nothing.”
Even if I was looking down at the ground of the court, I knew that the council had looked down at me too. “Junseok.” The head of the council mentioned me once more, causing me to lift my head up from the ground as I gulped when he got up from his seat, walking towards me with an unreadable gaze.
“... I chose you for a reason,” he stated, the blade of his silver-forged sword resting over my right shoulder as if it were a piece of cloth – as if it wouldn’t bring any danger to me. “But this is just disappointing, to paidí mou.”
I froze, my teeth grinding in shame as he took the blade off of my shoulder, placing it back on the left side of his throne. I was already trembling, feeling humiliated by the glares that I deserved. I knew I should’ve done better but I was too distracted.
“But this is not a sign to stop... So, before you go, do you have any conclusions about the Vanguard’s doings?” The other member of the council, Chanhee Choi, asked, slightly raising his finger up as if he wanted me to stay there.
“For all I know, the Vanguard uses criminals as his pawns but now, they’ve gotten worse,” I rambled nervously, licking my dry lips as the member who sat at the right side of the head chuckled.
“And why is that?” He asked, still chuckling. Maybe he was laughing at me because I ended up with nothing on the table.
I deserved it.
“The Vanguard’s pawns are now using the same magic he uses. I don’t know how he gives them those abilities but it’s been harder for me to fight them off,” I answered truthfully, taking a few short yet deep breaths in trying to prove something to them as he looked satisfied with what I told him.
“White magic, is it? Oh, he is up to no good,” he said, leaving his seat as the head of the council eyed his spontaneous actions.
“Sunwoo Kim, what are you doing?” He questioned, a bit annoyed at him.
“Crafting a new method for his search,” the other one responded vaguely, relaxed.
The scribes were later shown above as the rest of the council watched how Lord Sunwoo began to study my past activities in searching for the Vanguard.
My mouth was left open at the sight of levitating scrolls as I didn’t realize that it was time for me to return back to the seats, where the other shadows glared at me in disappointment too. At least I actually poured my determination into this. They’ll never know what it’s like to be alone on a mission.
“I warned you about her, Junseok. You're not here for her, you're here for the mission.” Bin reminded me as I rolled my eyes at him, later pulling both sides of the cloak’s hood over as I didn’t want to be stared at anymore. “She may be a good person but she’s also a distraction.”
“She isn’t one. Don’t forget, it’s part of my duty to keep her safe too,” I said back right away, causing him to let out a sigh as he didn’t believe in every single word that came out of my mouth.
Perhaps, this is one of the reasons why I only saw him as a companion. “But don’t pretend that it’s not affecting the way you work either. The council has high expectations for you, including me and the rest of Skia.” He fought back, not backing down one bit as I breathed out, irritated at him.
I’m not mad that he’s reminding me of my mission but I don’t like the way he talks about her. No one should talk about her that way.
“How would you understand? You’ve barely lived a life on Earth with others and by the looks of it, I’m sure I lived a happy one with Y/N.”
And Bin never liked what I said. Before he could even respond, the scribes above moved sideways as if Lord Sunwoo had already finished coming up with a new plan. In the middle, there was a view of real-world events as I witnessed how a certain thief had pushed the tip of a gun against someone’s head. The world is getting more dangerous than ever.
But as I looked closely, I realized that it wasn’t just a random person getting ambushed.
It was her.
“No… That’s Y/N,” I uttered almost unconsciously as the boy she was with protecting her from the criminal.
I should’ve been there. I should’ve protected her. “Isn’t she–,” Bin couldn’t finish his question as I was already on my way out of the temple, frustrated and ready to hunt that man down again.
Of course, the Vanguard found another toy to play with.
“Junseok, where are you going?!” The younger one finally managed to get his question out of his head, stopping him from following me as he stood behind me. I turned around to face him, tilting my head as I wanted to leave Skia and search for that menace.
“Home!” I sounded more agitated than before. “... I’m going home, Bin, and you can't stop me.”
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mgnifiqueyoo · 1 month ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.12 - "ΠΑΡΕΞΗΓΩ." Word Count: 2,430
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───── ❝ misunderstand. ❞ ─────
The class today was quite silent as we were told to read and rewrite an excerpt from a movie script, teaching us how to convey better emotion through writing. 
Well, it turns out that Mr. Juyeon didn't finish reading the film reviews we passed yesterday so he decided that it'd be better for us to just experiment with the ways we write. 
It wasn't that easy to change and rearrange words within a story, especially because it wasn't mine to begin with. 
I scribbled ideas down half of the page of my notebook, the other one reserved for the actual rewrite. I couldn't really find the right words for the scene I was rewriting and to be honest, I was kind of stuck. 
“Pssst!” I heard someone call from behind as I turned around, seeing a completely different person who seemed to be approaching… me. 
Huh?
Who is this again?
“... Yeah?” I didn't know how to respond to him, my eyes later panning to Junseok first before moving on to Seunghwan. 
They both seemed to be busy with the activity too. “You're Y/N, right? Seunghwan's friend?” The stranger asked politely, which made me space out for a bit, thinking of whoever he was. Maybe I've already seen him around this class but I never really caught up with his name.
Letting go of my pen, I turned to face him, shifting my shoulders almost completely so I could take a better look at his face. 
The boy had bright eyes, and a cleft chin, and his hair was in the shade of bronze as if he was somehow part of some monarchy. “And you are?” I asked back, which made him let out a small gasp, probably remembering that he hadn't even introduced his name yet. 
“Bin!” he said with a faint voice, lending me his arm. “First name, Bin. Last name, Won.”
I smiled back at him, taking his hand in mine as I shook it. “Anyways, I wanted to ask you for a tip… Just a small tip,” Bin explained, raising his hand not too high for a bit as his fingers made a pinching gesture in the air. 
Hmm, I wonder what he'll ask me about. This was the first time I talked to someone in my class. 
“What would you say to someone you loved in the past?” He proceeded to ask me the question as I sat there, staying silent for a while. Well, I did have a boyfriend two years ago but I couldn't say I loved him. But if the “love” he's talking about doesn't have to be defined by romantic love, I think I've got something to say.
“I'd say that I'm sorry for not loving that certain someone enough.”
Bin's lips carefully curled into a smile, later jotting it down in his own notebook as he gave me a thumbs-up. “Thanks!” He then gave me an excited nod, soon focusing on the activity. 
Well, that was quick. Shouldn't I be unfazed about it? Sometimes, I'm just so distracted with questions like that.
Thanks to Bin's question, I finally ended up finding the right words for my own work as the bell later rang, which alarmed our lecturer, who peacefully checked the rest of the film reviews we submitted. 
Oh, and today's also another Friday. The university decided that there shouldn't be a lot of heavy duties whenever the last day of the week came. 
Getting up from our seats, we passed all of our work to Mr. Juyeon, later heading our way out of the room as it was time for another break. 
Well, not really.
“Hey, Junseok!” Seunghwan's voice was so loud that I knew it was him immediately, causing me to turn around and see the two of them speaking to each other. "Is it okay if we borrow your girlfriend for now?” he continued to ask as I rubbed my thumbs against both sides of my forehead. 
He could've told him something else instead.
Was he there to piss Junseok off? I didn't know.
I decided to walk up to them, wanting to drag Seunghwan out of the conversation he started. “Oh, she isn't my girlfriend. How could I date someone like that? She's basically lacking everything,” Junseok responded with a strong, stern tone, which made the other one look a bit offended by what he said.
Yet it wasn't only him who felt like that.
All of us stayed quiet, especially after they noticed that I was already there. I didn't know how I should respond to what he said about me. “Um…” Junseok tried to say something to let the tension die down but it was no use because he couldn't even think of something. 
“You know, what? We're leaving now.” I faked a laugh, grabbing the cuff of Seunghwan's sweater as I led him out of the conversation. 
Maybe that was just him trying to not seem as if we were close… But we weren't close in the first place, were we?
As I left the hall with Seunghwan, we both thought that it was best for us not to talk about that little encounter. And of course, Hyunjun noticed the sudden silence, considering that the other boy was extroverted and quite jolly for him to be so solemn at the mall. 
“Is everything okay with you two?” He asked, holding up two pairs of clothing in both his hands as the two of us nodded at the same time, which was a sign that we were bothered…
Oh, how do we explain this to him?
“Yeah, everything's fine!” Seunghwan and I responded at once, causing the two of us to exchange surprised looks. 
“Don't go Tornado Twins at me. What's wrong?” Once he got what was up between us, Hyunjun placed down the clothes he held with both his eyebrows raised in doubt. It was probably frustrating for him since he belonged to a different course. 
Also, he doesn't share a lot of classes with me and Seunghwan. “It's just Junseok.” The other boy couldn't hold the truth in anymore as I sighed, not liking the fact that he still told Hyunjun what really was the issue. 
Or should I say, who?
Hyunjun tilted his head to the side, still in doubt of what Seunghwan was telling him. “Junseok? Again? You know, Y/N, you should leave that dude to himself!” He suggested, mixed with a bit of sarcasm but I understood why he sounded tired of the issue with that boy. 
I mean, how many times did Junseok treat me like garbage? 
Apparently, more than once.
“But I can't…” I retaliated, disagreeing with him as Hyunjun chuckled sarcastically, probably finding me ridiculous for thinking that way. 
“You can't? That's all in your head. If you keep thinking like that, then nothing will happen,” He replied, still with a stern tone yet calmer this time. He was furious about it and it seemed like this wasn't going to end well for both me and Junseok.
So I'll keep hiding basically. “Also, stop thinking about him for a sec and go find yourself something you like!” Hyunjun later tried to uplift the mood as I smiled at him, appreciating his efforts in quickly changing the topic. 
But I still thought of it.
I'll admit it. Those words he said were just as bad as the things he said before.
Then, I felt a weight over my shoulders once more as I lifted my head up to see Seunghwan, who also tried to cheer me up. “Just ignore Junseok. He'll come to his senses,” He said, trying to brush the problem off as I nodded, reminding myself to just not mind what he said about me. 
I mean, it's obvious that his intention was a lot more different than anyone could expect. 
But if that's what he really thought of me, then maybe I'll try meeting his expectations of the girl he used to be friends with.
“Oh! Pretty!” Seunghwan was suddenly fixated on the jewelry aisle, getting his hands on a delicate necklace in gold that had a tiny, white crystal-like flower placed right in the middle. “How much is this?” He later asked the seller, who stood behind the glass-covered table of the jewelry shop nearby as she couldn’t help but smile at his cheery reactions towards the necklace he held. 
“That’d be twelve,” The seller responded, resulting in the boy searching for his wallet in both of his pockets. 
When he paid for the necklace, he tore off the price tag straight away as he wore it around his neck, later looking in the small mirror on the top of the desk. “Hey, Y/N, they match, right?” Seunghwan asked me to take a closer look at both his golden compass necklace and his brand new one as I raised both of my hands midway, both of my thumbs going upwards as he giggled, satisfied with what he bought.
Honestly, that compass necklace he owned was still prettier than the new one.
“By the way, where did you get this one?” I asked, curious about the necklace Seunghwan always wore. When my hand reached for it, he raised both of his eyebrows for a moment and later nodded to himself in realization. 
“Oh, this? Somebody lost it during a high school field trip. None of my classmates owned it so I kept it instead.” He shrugged as I fiddled with its chain for a while, letting go of it right after.
It was so mesmerizing. 
Maybe I should borrow it someday.
Not long after, Hyunjun comes back from the check-out with two paper bags in his hands. “I see, you’re finally proud of what you got,” Seunghwan said with a fake British accent rolling off his tongue, causing the two of us to cackle at his joke. 
“Well, Sir, I must not hide these visuals I own from the many people around.” The cloudy boy played along as I shook my head, suppressing myself from laughing way too loud at the mall. “By the way, you should totally take pictures of me tomorrow because I need to post something at least!” He later added, pointing his finger at me as I was a bit surprised to find out that I took good pictures of him. 
I still wasn’t that good with other activities since I most likely enjoyed writing… and maybe learning about the weirdest things that exist around the internet in general. 
I guess that’s the reason why I couldn’t sleep right on time.
When the three of us made our way to the food court on the third floor, my eyes immediately noticed Junseok’s group of friends at the right side of the room, causing me to turn the other way, leaving the two boys to themselves. 
“... Huh? Hey, Y/N!” Seunghwan loudly called my name in the middle of the busy room. I widened my eyes, pausing from my fast pace as I began regretting what I had just done.
Why did he have to yell my name out in front of so many people?
Well, apparently, who’s stupid enough to leave her friends out? Yeah, that’s me.
Turning around, I faced Seunghwan with an awkward smile that was so full of shame. There, we all heard how Junseok’s friends snickered in their seats, whispering things that I couldn’t hear yet it was obvious enough for me to know that they were talking about us again. 
But taking a closer look at them, I realized something that was supposed to be not shocking to me anymore.
Junseok wasn’t there with them and that’s because he’s either busy at the realm he used to stay at or he’s doing something else – like beating up a bunch of criminals pretty much. 
“Hey, just ignore them,” Seunghwan repeated what he said earlier, walking towards me before linking his arm with mine as he grimaced at the rest of them, scowling at them right after as Hyunjun did the same no matter how easygoing he actually was.
Because of that, we all thought that maybe it would be best for us to just order a take-out rather than eat here alongside those people. 
God, it’s not that I hate them but if they weren’t so annoying, I wouldn’t have to care about them.
But of course, Junseok’s privacy has to come first. 
Later on, the three of us were finally outside the mall, walking our way back to the university’s dorm when loud sounds of tires scratching the cemented roads pierced my ears, causing me to look around what was happening. “Give me all of that or I’ll fucking shoot!” A man with a black mask growled angrily, pointing a gun toward us as Hyunjun threw the paper bags back at him, backing down.
For a while, I was tempted to do something but I figured that maybe Junseok would arrive soon, which made me stay still instead. 
Yet the opposite happened. “Let me go!”, I shouted, trying to escape the man’s grasp around me as the end of the gun was pointed against my head. 
“Don’t hurt her!” Seunghwan yelled at the masked man but it was no use, his gloved finger pointing at both of his necklaces. The boy took a pause, knitting his brows intensely as he ran towards the man who had taken me hostage, wrapping his hand around the trunk of the gun, pushing it backward until it was pointing towards the sky, leaving Hyunjun a chance to take me away from the criminal’s arms. 
Once I was free from him, I started concentrating in the shadows, trying to manifest a bow and arrow in my hands only to be disrupted by how Seunghwan took down the mugger singlehandedly without putting a lot of effort.
The mugger was on the floor, hands pinned behind his back by the once bubbly boy, who now looked more fueled than ever. 
“How did he just do that?” Hyunjun asked, the police sirens from the roads getting louder and nearer to the crime scene as I was fixated on Seunghwan, who put his weight over the thief’s back. 
I breathed out, “I… I have no idea.”
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mgnifiqueyoo · 1 month ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.11 - "ΜΙΑ ΠΑΡΩΔΙΑ." Word Count: 2,279
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───── ❝ a parody. ❞ ─────
“Junseok Oh and Y/N L/N.”
I lifted my head up from my desk, still drowsy from the lack of sleep I've had ever since last week as I looked over to the far right corner of the classroom, seeing the way Junseok stared at me in surprise. “Here we go again…” I trailed off, letting out a sigh as I listened to the short giggles that came from his group of friends.
Of course, they knew about it.
Well, not all of it, though. They still think we weren't friends.
“I expect all of you to submit the film analysis on Wednesday, okay?” Mr. Juyeon Lee was said to be a new lecturer as he had a bit of a chill take on teaching us. Apparently, he graduated from the university two years ago and I just think it's cool to have an old student teaching us about analyzing films.
The class finally came to an end and I purposely avoided the boy who sat far behind.
Why? Because no one should know about his purpose here and for sure, I'd get tied up in more complicated strings if this backfires. “I'm sure someone loves to be partners with you.” I heard the short, pearl-eyed one comment loudly, wanting me to hear all about their conversation as I rolled my eyes at them, making sure they got a different message instead.
What message? That I still hated him even if I never did. “Hey, Y/N!” A boy with a jolly voice called as I quickly hid my false annoyance with a smile, watching Seunghwan make his way upstairs with an even brighter grin. “Wanna eat lunch with me? I'm starving…” He took a pause, his hand on top of his stomach as his attention seemed to have been caught by someone from behind.
Please.
Don't let it be Junseok.
“He's looking at you. Don't turn around.” Seunghwan warned as I sighed once more, already feeling the pressure over me.
I mean, could I really ignore him? There's just no way I could do that. “You know, what? I think we should go,” I rambled out spontaneously, excusing myself as I headed all the way downstairs, not even waiting for the bright boy to follow me.
As soon as he caught up, he placed his arm over both of my shoulders like usual, causing me to walk slower than before. “Okay, why are you avoiding him again? I thought you guys were friends?” He asked with a mix of cluelessness and confusion as I hummed in response, unsure of what I'd tell him.
Should I say it was all complicated? Maybe that would work.
“It's complicated.” I breathed out dramatically, keeping my focus on the path in front of me as it didn't take long for the other group of boys to laugh loudly from behind.
“Look, it's just complicated! I don't like talking about her.” Junseok complained from the back, lying at the same time as I could feel how Seunghwan even turned around to face them.
“Ah, he's really an asshole.” The boy grumbled innocently.
“Indeed,” I said back, nodding.
As the two of us made our way to the left hall, we both saw Hyunjun standing next to the classroom he was in, resting his head against the wall as he seemed to be occupied with music. “Hyunjun!” Seunghwan called him without any hint of shyness as the boy took off his earphones and shoved them down to his pocket, heading towards us with a smile on his face.
“Oh, man! I thought classes were easy today but no, the timeline decided to hate me,” the personified cloud told us, groaning out of exhaustion as I tilted my head to the side, intrigued.
This was one of the first times when Hyunjun seemed to be frustrated.
“Why? What happened?” I questioned, having the sudden urge to solve a problem that wasn't even mine.
“Well, I'm partners with Junmin Ryu in the laboratory for Botany- Ugh, he's just really annoying to work with.”
I guess I wasn't the only one having a pretty bad day, huh?
And when the moon finally took the place of the sun, I was sitting alone at my desk inside my room. I figured that if I started the homework early, then the two of us wouldn't get stuck on one part.
Well, he had a valid reason to not participate but he insisted on doing the homework with me over texts.
At exactly eight o'clock, I heard several knocks on the door, causing me to leave my desk and answer it. There stood Junseok, who gave me a wide smile yet I was even more distracted by the cut on his cheek.
“What happened to you?” I asked, not even greeting him with a plain “hey” as I immediately let him walk into my room.
The boy quickly headed towards the seat next to my desk, already scrolling through the unfinished document on my laptop as he tried to avoid the issue.
How could he avoid the issue? It's literally on his face. “Hey! Answer me.” I was persistent, crossing my arms as he only stared back at the laptop's screen, not even planning to turn around.
It wasn't just the cut on his cheek that was telling me something might've gone wrong as his hair was even a little damp than usual, unkempt.
He never looked this way before. Not even after the fight with Yeonjun.
“It's not that much, you know? It'll heal overnight,” Junseok said back blankly, not taking his eyes off of the screen as I made my way to the edge of the bed, facing him. Of course, he had no chance of escaping me unless he chose to travel in the shadows, which is honestly quite rude if he did.
“Okay but who did you fight tonight?” I thought that he was the type of person who wanted to get things straight and clear.
So, I’m just complying.
“The Vanguard,” Junseok answered, his tone serious and his attention away from the laptop. I don’t even know what that is.
“Excuse me? The… What now?” I squinted my eyes at him, grimacing at the many layers of his identity. Well, what can I expect? He’s not even his old self anymore.
“The Vanguard of False Truths, a criminal from Fotos Vasileo… The Light Realm.”
I uncrossed my arms and leaned forward, my elbows pressing against my knees as I needed to know more about the criminal he was talking about. “Basically, he’s been around for centuries and no one in Skia has caught him yet.” The boy continued as I nodded, furrowing my brows as I tried to put the pieces together.
None. I formed nothing since I didn’t even know that criminals existed.
“And you’re trained to catch him?” I guessed, gaining a single nod.
“Well, duh? What else could be the reason?” He shrugged, almost rolling his eyes.
I spaced out at a random corner of the room, particularly the framed picture of the two of us as I began thinking of what it’s like to meet this criminal of the Light Realm or whatever that is called. “Since I was brought back to life by the shadows, I am part shadow too and that’s why I have this.” He pointed his finger towards the glowing cut on his cheek as the wound was still shining, still fresh.
Also, he looked pretty much agitated by it, probably not used to feeling pain at all. “How many times have you met this Vanguard?” I asked one question from all of the other questions that I came up with in just a few moments of silence.
“Well, a lot of times actually but I never saw his face,” he answered, looking up at the ceiling as he probably thought of more things to say about this criminal. “... He’s just this glowing, white orb to me.”
Well, that’s a decent description. No one could see who this Vanguard was despite his presence being felt.
It’s a weird concept but it definitely adds to the mystery.
Junseok later lowered down the laptop’s screen, resting over the desk’s surface as he turned his head to the side, raising an eyebrow at the framed picture. “I never knew you kept something like that.” He pointed out, his tone a mix of being laid-back and fascination. He was probably feeling all sorts of things when he saw himself in an old picture, which he had no memory of.
“Does it hurt when you look at it?” He questioned, both in wonder and in pity as I took in a very deep breath, knowing that maybe it’d be better if I just said it.
“Sometimes but right now, it just gives me a sign of hope, you know? To keep going.” I let the truth flow out of me, seeing the way Junseok’s gaze softened when he listened to me.
Maybe it shocked him. Maybe he wondered how he was before.
The boy later breathed out a quiet giggle, lifting himself off of the desk as we both sat there in silence. The two of us didn’t know each other’s stories and struggles because, to me, it seemed like I wasn’t the only one who kept struggling over the matter.
He never remembered a single thing about our friendship.
And I still had no clue about who he was now.
“I didn’t know I mattered that much to you,” Junseok admitted his thoughts once more, not holding back his true feelings as he used to as I chuckled. It may be odd but I enjoyed talks like this since I’m not that used to talking that much.
“You still do actually,” I said back, which made him smile cheekily again.
But that smile only made the cut on his cheek worsen. “You know? Let’s at least clean that up.” I blurted out rapidly, bothered at how the fresh wound was leaking oil with a bit of black smoke emitting from it. In a matter of seconds, I got off of the bed and rummaged through the cabinets, where I placed the first-aid kit that was all the way from Jeju.
Later on, I dipped a cotton ball in both water and soap as I headed out of the bathroom, seeing how Junseok didn’t even think of refusing this time. “Stay still, okay?” I told him beforehand, and he nodded quickly as if he was hurrying me to just dab the cotton ball into the broken skin. Carefully, the damp cotton ball touched the cut, causing his eyes to close for a quick moment as he probably felt it stinging.
“Are you okay?” I asked him, looking away from the cut as I stared into his gaze. I could tell that he wasn’t afraid of it but the way he looked back at me with a sense of uncertainty, I assumed he didn’t experience this at all.
What experience? He never experienced getting help from anyone.
And to think that he’s been like this for three years already; it’s a little tragic.
“... Now, you’ve got me thinking about something,” Junseok suddenly spoke, which didn’t really stop me from rubbing the cotton ball over his wound gently yet it did catch my attention.
“Well, what is it?” I asked back, watching how the redness of the cut had toned down as the black smoke that used to come out of it had also disappeared.
“Why do you still care about me? I think we both know that I’m not the same... I’m different now. I don't think I'm anything like him.”
I was a bit startled at the question because I knew he was right and I had no other reason to help him out. “Maybe because you remind me of the person you once were… The friend I used to have.” I was honest and the feeling of saying that with a blank face was more bitter than round coffee as I put down the red-tinted cotton ball on the side of the desk.
Junseok was obviously not ready to hear that from me, which was new but not surprising for me anymore. “Do you think I’ll be just like him again? Just like who I was before?” He asked, the atmosphere in the room turning even more overwhelming – but also, it was silent as if the heart had stopped beating. I’ve never thought he’d ask questions like this but maybe he’s just as desperate as I was with remembering the past.
My lips parted away, ready to answer when the door suddenly creaked open as I might’ve forgotten to lock it.
Great job, Y/N.
“Oh, you guys… you guys seem busy,” Seunghwan stuttered, holding a bag of popcorn in one hand as Hyunjun stood stiffly next to him, a bit fazed to see me in an awkward, unexplainable position with the boy who sat on the chair next to my desk.
“... Yeah, we’re about to do the homework.” I managed to utter a decent sentence, turning on the laptop once more as the screen shone in the dimly lit room.
Well, the scenery did not help in making any of this look appropriate enough.
“Hey, quick question: can you guys leave?” Junseok asked snarkily.
“Adios,” the two said at once, shutting the door closed; well, that was one hell of a headache.
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mgnifiqueyoo · 2 months ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.9 - "Η ΑΛΗΘΕΙΑ." Word Count: 2,129
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───── ❝ the truth. ❞ ─────
That night, I was unable to sleep.
Why? Because I could still hear the way he told me those words.
That it was his duty to stand up for me. That he wanted me to be safe. That he wanted to call me when I needed his help. In the first few weeks, I thought he hated me but now, it doesn’t seem like that anymore.
What is he hiding from me? Why is he so goddamn confusing? All I could do was stare at the ceiling that hovered above me, empty and doubting that he didn’t have second thoughts. He acts as if he knows me but he looks at me as if it’s the first time he’s ever seen me.
Like I was both a stranger and a friend to him if that made sense.
Shifting towards the other side of my bed, I turned my phone on, letting light basically almost blind me as I squinted my eyes, feeling pain from the brightness of it as I saw a few texts from the two people I made friends with.
It was the first time they'd flooded me with texts, probably afraid of what could've happened at the party, considering the fact that Junseok left even if he was part of those who planned it. But even if they were concerned, I wasn't sure whether to respond or not.
It's probably because they'll think I'm crazy if I ever told them what I witnessed during that fight. Not a lot of action happened yet Yeonjun was mysteriously lying down on the murky dance floor, his nose bleeding from the bridge as he seemed to be almost knocked out… Well, almost.
God, it scares me to think of what I'll go through in the next few days since I was the reason why Junseok acted that way. "... Am I going crazy?" I asked myself, turning off my phone as I decided that it would be better for me to keep my mouth shut for now. They shouldn't know what happened back there or they might as well go crazy as I am now.
A reason for that is the fact that it's the mayor's son that Junseok dealt with and the other reason is that it was too impossible for the fight to end that way.
As if he wasn't even human after all.
Days soon passed and it was time for me to attend classes again, which also meant that I had to pretend like everything was normal. Everyone had also come back from their homes, the party fever finally coming off of them as they seemed to be busy working on their leftover assignments.
Yet it seemed as if not all of them had already moved forward from the party as Seunghwan and Hyunjun had been giving me glares ever since the morning started.
"What?" I pretended to not know what they were thinking as they rolled their eyes in unison like they were some kind of twins at this point.
"You know what we both know,” Seunghwan whined while Hyunjun nodded without any sign of hesitation.
There's just no way I could escape this, right?
Ah, fine.
"It's about the fight, isn't it?" I asked them both as Hyunjun was the first one to nod while the other one was left spacing out, probably thinking deeply if it really was about the fight. "Look, Yeonjun started it and Junseok just won! End of story!" I blurted out, both of my hands going to places as if they were jets as the two of them still didn't seem convinced.
But that was it! The two of them had a weirdly quick fight and it's over!
Well… Maybe not for me.
"Yeah, but what was the fight even about?" Seunghwan questioned, furrowing his brows as he probably began to think of possibilities as to why it all resulted in Yeonjun being a crumpled mess on the floor. I froze for a while, trying to choose between telling them the truth or not. God, I don't even know where to begin.
I don't even know how to tell them that Junseok's aims were trippy.
I just couldn't move on from the fact that he wasn't even visible.
Just a shadowy blur spinning around Yeonjun.
"It was about me- Well, not completely since Yeonjun was the one who…" I stopped in the middle of the sentence, catching my breath as I could feel the way he forcefully pushed me against the wall that night.
I never thought of it as something so awful until I remembered how it all felt again. Even if he hadn't done it further, the fear of having no choice but to give up was still there.
Still breathing heavily in my head, pounding on my chest every once in a while.
There was a gust of wind that was right next to me and I completely stopped dead in my tracks. "Y/N?” I heard one of them call my name and I couldn't even recognize who tried to wake me up from my thoughts.
"Hey!" The owner of the voice soon became clearer for me as I saw Seunghwan right in front of me, his hands both grasping my arms tightly as if he was about to shake me off of the sudden quietness.
I didn't know what was happening to me or my head but god, I knew I wasn't quite right. "What's going on?" The boy questioned once more, the concern showing in his eyes as I wasn't even able to come up with a decent answer.
What's going on with me? I don't know.
Why don't I always know?
"I knew it." Hyunjun later chuckled deeply, rolling his eyes as his arms were soon crossed. He had a bitter look on his face, which was something that I wasn't used to seeing.
"Yeonjun did something to you, didn't he?" He was obviously pissed off, causing me to just nod in response, shuddering. Even Seunghwan wasn't used to how irritated his friend was, out of words to say and puzzled.
The boy who studied Ecology seemed to have been hiding his feelings that expressed this. Disappointed but not surprised. "... I don't think I can imagine how scared you were." Hyunjun didn't just sound like he was completely bothered by it, he also looked that way. Seunghwan, on the other hand, didn't say a word but instead, he placed one arm over my shoulders, not putting too much weight either as it was all for comfort.
"Then, you could've witnessed everything that happened, right?" Hyunjun asked all of a sudden.
"... Well, not everything," I answered hesitantly.
And so, events from the venue came flashing back as if I was alone in a cinema, watching the tape roll. "The fight… It was weird to me." I started to tell my point of view, something that wasn't seen by those who posted about the fight on the internet. "Well, nothing was weird at that party but the fight was abrupt… I mean, you guys saw the videos. What do you think?" I still found a way to distract myself from those lingering thoughts that at any moment, I could be treated as an object to play with.
What way? Obsess over the fight.
I know the fight happened in the dark and there were a lot of people cheering for both sides but mostly Yeonjun since he's the privileged mayor's son obviously – but it was weirdly too quick. And when we returned to the dorms that night, Junseok didn't have a single bruise on his face or at least a cut on his cheek, maybe?
As if he wasn't affected at all. "I think that the fight happened way too fast. I've seen some fights in high school and both people didn't end well.” Seunghwan tried to lighten things up as Hyunjun and I finally both smiled after the long talk about whatever Yeonjun did.
"All of the videos were glitchy, to be honest like what is this? The 2010's?" Hyunjun joked as the other boy laughed in response, only resulting in me sinking deeper in my questions. If the videos were glitchy to them, then it wasn't just my perspective that the fight must've ended in a flicker.
Oh, god.
Great. More things to think about.
And when I was about to say one more thing about it, that familiar gust of wind came back again, causing me to forget everything I had in mind.
There, Junseok walked straight to the other hall, determined and ignoring every single thing that happened in his surroundings. I found myself drawn to him again. Was this the right time for me to ask him what was going on? Maybe not.
But I was tempted to know the truth. "Hey, Y/N? Where are you going?" Seunghwan asked, confused as to why I was already heading in the other direction without saying anything, focused on nothing but the boy who kept so many things hidden from me. There was the urge to ask him all of the questions I could think of.
To learn the reason why he's here, coincidentally attending the same school as I did.
Not much of a coincidence if he's all the way from Crete, right?
"Junseok Oh!" I called his name, raising my voice as it sounded as angry as a storm's growl would be. Everyone from both sides of the hall turned to look at me except for Junseok himself, speeding up his pace as I sighed. Looking at each of them, I decided to just ignore them as I marched all the way to where he was headed.
But then, I lost track of him, looking from left to right in panic. "Shit."
And an open palm was slammed onto my mouth, the other arm dragging me into… the restroom?
How did I even get in here?
"Jun… Junseok?" I stuttered, backing away when I saw how both of his eyes glowed in white. God, I felt so terrified but my legs felt as if they were stuck on the floor, shaking yet still.
"I won't hurt you… Just listen to me for a bit." He breathed out heavily as he turned to look at the mirror at the side, his eyes soon turning back to normal before he chose to face me once more.
I couldn't understand the way he looked into my eyes but he knew deeply that this wasn't supposed to happen. "A- Are you real?" I sniffled, tears forming at the corners of my eyes as he walked closer to me, which made me let out a yelp in fear, covering my face with my arms. "Get away from me!" I cried out as he shushed me right away, scared of getting caught by other people as well and he locked the door behind me shut.
I don't understand. How can someone like him exist?
"I'm not going to hurt you,” he said, his face full of guilt as he even took a few steps away. I uncovered my face, putting both of my arms down as I looked back at him, his stare gloomy and hopeless.
"What are you?- Who even are you?" I didn't even know what to ask him first, letting out a nervous chuckle right after.
I didn't know what to do anymore.
"It's still me… but different,” He hesitantly replied.
"Do you even remember me?" I asked, already desperate as he shook his head.
I scoffed, later laughing at myself for even hoping that he would.
Everything that's been happening recently is just laughable. I can't even take it all seriously because I don't have the power to change it. I'll always live in an abnormal reality no matter how much I want to escape it.
"There's a reason for it."
Junseok came closer to me and looked down at his hand. I noticed how it didn't even cast a shadow on the blue tiles of the restroom. "The night I died, I was brought back to life by the shadows for a specific mission,” The boy said, later panning his gaze to me as I only stayed silent.
I needed to hear more.
"And if I fulfill my duty, then in return, they'll give me my life back."
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mgnifiqueyoo · 3 months ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.6 - "ΞΕΡΑΜΕΝΑ ΦΥΛΛΑ." Word Count: 2,338 note: i took a bit of a break because i just started my job !! enjoy reading ^^
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───── ❝ dried leaves. ❞ ─────
As soon as classes ended, I headed back to my room with no thoughts of hanging out with anyone, not even Seunghwan or Hyunjun. 
There were already a lot of assignments and I just thought that it'd be better for me to start early rather than having to work on it late, especially since I'm now invited to Rakwon's party. Even though hours have passed already, I still have no idea why Junseok would want me to be there. 
He literally didn't like just seeing me and would always talk about how stupid I was. Why would he want to be with someone he didn't like?
I leaned my back against the chair's rails, taking a deep breath as I noticed how lovely the sight was. On most days, my last class would end late as I'd be sitting here at my desk, facing the night skies. Yet today, the skies were still in a shade of periwinkle, the clouds white and fluffy, and lastly, the bronzed scenery glowing under the sunlight. Of course, I was distracted from doing my homework but should I really take my eyes off of that?
It was perfect. 
And it felt like everything was perfect.
Trying to search for my phone on my desk without looking away from the view, my palm came across a flat surface with four corners and I remembered that the picture was still facing down 'til now. 
"Oh…" I furrowed my brows, squinting my eyes as my head turned away. I didn't know if I had enough bravery to even lift it up from the desk. 
I'm not even sure if I could look at the picture the same way again.
As usual, I lifted the framed picture upright anyway even if I knew it'd be painful for me. And there he was, smiling at me again while the past version of me stood next to him with the same proud smile. 
It reminded me of his smile earlier when he was asking me to be his plus-one with the same head tilt and eye smile. It was impossible for me to forget about him.
Especially his past.
And so I thought that maybe he wasn't aware of it or maybe he was doing something to cope with what happened. I'm not really sure but there has to be something he did. 
His parents died on the same ship, there was no way he could've forgotten them... He loved them so much. They were his motivation to pursue his dreams.
But now, he's acting as if he's never even met them. Was it amnesia? I really hope it is. Pretending to forget everything with the intention of hurting those who failed to save him is a bitter move but at the same time, he has every right to feel that way. 
But he needs to know that I tried. I really tried to know more about what happened but the police wouldn't tell me anything.
Because they said I was too young to know more. I could've done better but I keep on letting him down.
I sighed, my fingertips touching the surface of the glass as the day we first talked to each other came back to me again like I was watching a movie scene over and over. Like it was a complete Groundhog Day. 
A loop I made myself.
"You think so?" Younger me questioned, still fixated on the paper Junseok once had in his hands as he puckered his lips for a while, later both nodding and humming in response. 
"I think I have to apologize personally to you,” He said without hesitating, getting closer to my side as he read what I wrote on the piece of paper once again but this time, in silence. 
At that moment, I didn't know why he should feel like that since he never treated me badly but I was intrigued enough to let him speak.
"I was… I didn't want to sit next to you because of what they were saying." Junseok bit his bottom lip afterward, looking away as he paid attention to every single thing that happened in the classroom. One student was cleaning her own desk while others were either talking about how annoying our adviser was or how they wanted our reading break to come earlier. "But now, I understand why you're into writing so much…"
"What do you mean?" I asked once again.
"Because you do it well,” Junseok answered encouragingly, stating it as if it was obvious.
He later faced towards the whiteboard in front of the classroom’s seats as I did the same. I don’t usually get comments like that from fellow classmates but at least I heard them from teachers, right? 
That’s how I knew I wasn’t technically a normal person despite everyone having a unique color in them yet when he told me those words, I thought that maybe I wasn’t alone.
“Do you want to eat lunch with me tomorrow?” Junseok broke the silence between us; I was shocked to hear that from him.
“... With you?” I asked back, feeling ashamed from the many questions I’d already asked as the boy only nodded, his perfect bunny teeth shining as well as his gaze did. 
“If you only want to, you know? I noticed that you’ve been all by yourself most of the time so why not try being around someone, right?” His words felt like big pillows and a thick blanket on a cold, winter’s night – something that provided a bit of warmth within me. I didn’t even realize that I was already smiling back at him, which made him snicker. 
“You should smile more. It suits you,” He suggested, winking at me right after as I laughed.
That was one of the few moments I’ve laughed loudly.
“Hey, Junseok!” One of his friends, Junho Jeong, called his name, causing him to get up from his seat as he skipped his way to the group of boys who waited for him. Meanwhile, I decided to get myself ready to return back home since I was a few streets away from the school and I was scared of coming home late again. As I carried the string bag over my back, I made my way outside of the classroom when I felt someone approach me, lightly poking the side of my arm.
And when I turned around, it was him again. 
“I’ll see you tomorrow lunch, okay? Don’t forget that!” He reminded me as he clearly couldn’t hide his excitement, which caused me to repeatedly nod, fooling along with him. 
“I won’t!” I gladly responded as I waved my hand at him before heading my way out of the school’s halls. 
Surely, a lot of them started mumbling to each other about my conversation with him but for the first time, I didn’t even care about it.
It felt like an achievement for me.
To not feel too lonely yet not too crowded.
That afternoon, I came home with a rather joyful look on my face and my parents completely caught on it. “What’s that smile? Are you dating someone?” My mother asked, her tone sharp yet the look on her face said otherwise, excited if I ever thought of seeing anyone. They never told me about it but I could always feel that they had expectations for me ever since they realized how I was stuck to my desk most of the time, coming up with something to write instead of making friends with other people. 
And maybe this was one of the rare times they’ve caught me smile.
“Oh, me? I’m not dating anyone,” I replied, still forgetting to let go of the smile on my face as she chuckled, shaking her head afterward. My father, however, seemed to be curious enough to ask follow-up another question. 
“Are you sure? ‘Cause I haven’t seen you smile like that yet.” He brushed my hair to the other side of my face, taking a closer look at me as he smiled, later heading his way back to the kitchen, wiping the sweat off of his forehead with a towel. 
“I just… I think I made a new friend.” 
With only those words, they were fascinated enough to leave the kitchen to ask me all about it. 
I guess they wanted me to live a less peculiar life.
“What’s his name?” My father questioned once more as we were all seated at the table as if dinner had come earlier. When I was about to answer, the light from above suddenly flickered, which meant that I had to replace it tomorrow. 
We weren’t really well off. 
“... Oh! Don’t mind that now. Just tell us all about him until the light goes out.” My mother reassured, quickly taking my attention away from the blinking light as it felt uplifting for me to just continue. 
“His name is Junseok,” I said, finally revealing his name, seeing how the excitement filled the looks of their faces as their anticipation came along right after, which made me flinch as I waved both of my hands as fast as I could. I didn’t want them to expect anything from it. “Oh, but I don’t know him that well! He just asked me to eat lunch with him tomorrow!” I immediately took it all back with a higher tone as they both let out a groan.
Well, I had no idea how to tell them not to set their expectations high with my social skills so I was left with no choice but to clear up things as early as possible. 
Two married extroverts with an introverted kid… And until now, people still don’t get the reason why I’m awkward as hell.
Now, I’m sitting alone in my dorm room, only finding out that the skies turned into a navy shade after looking away from the picture frame. I wonder how my parents are feeling right now. 
My life has never been the same since Junseok passed away… Well, at first, I thought that was the truth but I guess that never happened at all. 
And it turns out that it wasn’t just my life that got affected. My parents have met him before and it’s probably because whenever he had free time, he’d be at the garage with my father to repair the damaged cars of the neighbors who’d ask him for help or he’d be around the kitchen with my mother to help her with baking cakes. Unlike the past friends I’ve had before, he’s really the only one who was willing to be around my parents.
He’s a nice kid and always has been that way until that trip. 
As I closed my windows, I came up with the idea of walking outside for a little while. I already had spent the entire afternoon thinking about my past friendship with him and I thought that maybe this was a chance for me to think more about what’s happening now between us. 
Is Junseok ever going to be the same person he was before? I don’t know how to feel about it.
I mean, I don’t want him to feel forced to do it. If this is the type of person he is right now, then I have to just accept it. 
It’s not like he’s the only friend I should have in this world. I still have Seunghwan and Hyunjun around and having one friend is already something special, what more if I have two of them, right?
But despite thinking of it that way, I couldn’t help but miss those days, when everything was simpler – less complicated.
As I wore my headphones, I made my way outside of the room, locking it shut as I shoved my keys into the pocket of my pajamas. I’m not even going to lie about it but walking down these halls alongside a few students was awkward. I mean, it actually could’ve been better if there were more people around instead of just one or two. 
Obviously, I walked faster than ever in response to it because I didn’t think I could bear the awkward silence as one of them was even answering a very angry phone call with probably their parents.
But the experience of that awkwardness was the one that made me figure out that maybe going to the party with Junseok wouldn’t be such a bad idea! I’m sure if I stayed quiet enough, no one would notice me or would come up to me to form some small talk… Well, that’s what I hope I’ll be feeling on Friday night. It’d be a bummer if it wasn’t.
When I stepped out of the dormitory’s floors, I was met with a cool, feather-like breeze that swept my hair away from my sight. It felt as if my mind was refreshed by the scenery – lights that dangled around the sidewalks of the university made me feel as if I was finally set free from the cold memories that held me back inside. Too much freedom on my own yet I was satisfied to know that it was my choice to be out here, enjoying the music that played into my ears for only me to hear.
“In love, in love… I used to be so in love.”
I swayed subtly while I walked down the cemented sidewalk, letting myself be enchanted by the singer’s husky tone like there wasn’t anyone around. It was my first time to walk the university without anyone next to me and it seemed as if no one was caring about my actions. 
That’s how I knew that tonight was perfect.
That’s how I found out that I should let myself out of the dark, thundering clouds of the storm. This was already a new chapter after all.
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mgnifiqueyoo · 4 months ago
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Book: "Vessel." Pairing: Oh Junseok (ATBO) x Reader 1.1 - "MIA NEA APXH." Word Count: 2,050
(m.list | next.)
───── ❝ a new start. ❞ ─────
The sun shone nicely within the blue skies as I breathed deeply, knowing that today would be a lot different than before. I hugged my backpack closer to my chest while I watched how the tall buildings of the city passed by.
“Are you okay, Y/N?” My uncle asked from the front seat of the car, snapping me out of my attention as I nodded quickly even if it wasn’t the way I felt. Every single day felt as if nothing was new even if I knew to myself that I would be having a new start here.
Here in Seoul.
“You know, you seem a bit timid for someone who got accepted in IST,” he added, resulting in me chuckling. Well, I don’t know either why I still felt this way but I knew the exact reason why I never smiled that much anymore. Nonetheless, my uncle was right. How could I not be excited? Scholarship at IST University is everything I’ve wanted, right? I guess that wasn’t the case for me anymore.
Maybe soon it’ll sink into me deeper and I just hope that maybe I could smile about it, too. I was one of the few students who passed both exams for IST University. Well, one test was for the general audience who would also pay their way in but the other test was what I’m focused on. It’s not more of a want but it’s more of a need for me to be qualified for the scholarship program.
Why? Because my parents wouldn’t have to pay for my tuition. I always knew that I was made for something that wasn’t in Jeju.
Often, I was criticized for my passion in literature and I don’t know why they acted that way towards me. Maybe they were uneducated? I think that wouldn’t be that much of a possibility.
And within the top half of the takers, I managed to be at a bit of a higher rank, which was shocking. I wasn’t an honor student but somehow, I happened to be there and not even my parents expected that. But even after I saw the exam results, I remained kept together – maybe a bit more blunt than I should’ve reacted.
But why? What could be the reason behind that melancholic expression?
“I’m not. I’m just tired.” I quickly formed an excuse, which made him let out a scoff. Despite not being around him for a few years since he moved from Jeju to Seoul, he always knew whenever something was up with me.
“... Still thinking about him?”, he asked as I cleared my throat, gulping as I rested my back against the cushion of the car seat.
Never did I skip one day not thinking about him.
But before I could even give him an answer, we finally reached the university’s dormitory and he first got out of the car to take my luggage with him. I never really brought most of my belongings because not a lot of them were necessary enough.
But maybe I’ve bought something that would remind me of home and the reason why I’m here now. Who knew Jeju could be such a pain in my chest?
As I made my way out of the car, I tightened the straps of my backpack to lessen the uncomfortable feeling of carrying something heavy over my back. It seemed as if everything around me was bronzed in a way. From the leaves to the exterior design of IST’s dormitory, it never failed to tell me that autumn had just arrived. It was beautiful.
I wonder how he would’ve reacted if he'd seen this.
Grasping the straps of my backpack tighter, my uncle gave me a single nod as the two of us made our way in. First, we were greeted by the dormitory’s guards; I even smiled at them, later scanning my I.D. card over to confirm if I was indeed a student. As my face was shown on the screen, my uncle and I were finally able to walk the halls.
“Well, Room 333 is your stop, right?” he asked as I nodded, still thinking about how I was supposed to move here without struggling too much. “I’d have to go, then. You take care of yourself, okay?”
I nodded yet again, waving my hand at him as I watched him walk away. Yet before I could even twist the doorknob of my room, I heard someone from across the hall breathing heavily, causing me to turn to the right.
There, two rooms away from mine was a boy who wore a blue sweatshirt and a pair of black slacks, struggling with his heavy luggage, which made me feel concerned for him.
“Hey!” I called him, failing to fight the urge to stay quiet as he looked over to my side, his eyes widening as he grinned right after.
“Do you need help?” I questioned, which caused him to nod and wipe his sweat off of his face as I walked towards him, carrying my backpack and strolling my luggage across the tiles at once. This is the reason why I didn’t want to bring too much.
“Can you help me get these inside? I’m sorry for bothering you,” he apologized as I shook my head, reassuring him that it was alright as I opened the door, later helping him push what seemed like an extra desk for him inside the room. It’s one of the heaviest things I’ve ever pushed in my entire life.
“Ah! That was too heavy!” The boy kept catching his breath as I took a look around the room. Well, even if it wasn’t mine, every room in the dormitory probably looked like this.
“Hey,” He uttered as I turned around to look at him, smiling as I didn’t want him to think that I was just a dull student overall. “... Your name?” He asked, his shoulder raising at the same time before crossing his arms, still having a bright smile on his face.
“Oh? I’m Y/N L/N. I’m from Jeju,” I answered, snickering in awkwardness.
“I’m Seunghwan Jeong! From Busan,” he said back, maintaining his cheeky smile.
Well, to be honest, I’d think he’s the complete opposite of me for today. His eyes were glimmering under the sunlight that passed through the windows while he rambled about how far Jeju was from Seoul.
“Actually, I just came here from a really chaotic flight and… I guess I’m supposed to live here for the rest of the year.” Seunghwan breathed out with an overwhelmed look on his face, later looking around the room while I took note of how enthusiastic he was. “Oh, by the way! What course are you?” He quickly came up with a question, causing me to let out a few giggles.
He’s so bubbly. I wish to be like that someday.
“Literature, you?” I asked back as his eyes widened even more.
“Me, too! Oh, we definitely need to hang out more,” he commented, winking an eye at me as I was a bit taken aback.
At the same time, he didn’t seem like he was flirting with me either. Of course, everything fell silent. I just didn’t know how to make the conversation longer. I was just used to how it was back in Jeju, where I enjoyed spending my time alone. Sure, there were a few people who watched me scribble through my notepad as I let my emotions and the atmosphere create something out of it but I wasn’t close to anyone… Well, anyone except for one person.
“Um… Do you want me to help you out in your room?” Seunghwan came up with yet another question to lessen the tension as I was snapped out of my trance once more.
“Sure!” I smiled, later heading out of the room along with him as he volunteered to carry my backpack.
Once I pushed the door open, I was met with a different scenery. Everything was just like Seunghwan’s room from the cupboards to the small bed at the side yet something still sparked within me.
I guess this was what Seunghwan felt earlier.
I’d be living here all by myself for the whole year.
Taking my backpack from his arms, I pulled out the framed picture that I once placed in my bedroom back in Jeju. The frame was wooden and the glass was a bit dusty due to how it was from three years ago but the picture that lies beneath its wooden base and the glass still felt new.
My uncle was right. I still thought of him.
“I think I’m fine. You can go now,” I told the boy, which made him form a confused look on his face as I could see how my blank face reflected on the glass over his necklace that seemed like a chained compass.
“Call me if you need anything!” He cheerfully reminded, later waving his hand as he made his way out of the room, closing the door shut.
And I found myself still staring back at the picture, later deciding that maybe it would be best for me to just place it over my desk. The only one who ever understood the person behind the writings couldn’t even be here for me because of that one night.
Oh, how I miss you, Junseok.
Obviously, I couldn’t get my mind off of what happened. When I was still in eighth grade, everyone looked up to him. Why? He was never the type to start fights yet he was also the best in the sports team, mainly Taekwondo. Whenever things would go wrong, he’d always find a way to fix it and maybe laugh at the situation once it’s done.
He was my best friend.
I didn’t know if he counted me as the same but it felt like he did.
The moment he read one of the things I’ve written before, his curiosity grew and he would always take the chance to sit right next to me, even if we were already seatmates in class. I didn’t know what part of what I wrote made him feel so interested in getting to know me but I remembered how nice it felt to be around someone so… awesome, maybe?
“Let me be the water that embraces you, a beautiful flower. A water lily. So that no storm can ever hurt you as it isn’t my heart’s choice.”
I remembered how he was standing still, reading the written words over the lost page of my notebook aloud as I immediately turned around, attempting to take it away from his hand but he refused.
“You wrote this, right?” Junseok had a teasing grin, which made me expect that he’d make fun of how I loved to write such things that I still haven’t experienced.
“... Um, yeah. Why?” I stayed still as he handed the sheet willingly to me.
“It’s beautiful… I don’t understand why my friends think you’re weird,” He mumbled, sitting down on the chair next to mine as I kept my head down, not knowing what I should say back.
“They do?” I pretended not to know just to keep the conversation going as he nodded, his lips forming into a pout as he knitted his brows in confusion.
“Yeah? Honestly, I just think they just want to be as creative as you." Junseok's eyes acted as windows to his emotions, his head tilting quickly as if he never liked the things his friends said about me.
And that small interest he had was the beginning of everything I never thought I'd lose.
I couldn't take my eyes off of the picture, knowing that it was taken during the time I won a poem writing contest at school as I was holding the certificate with a bright smile on my face – something that I wasn't that able to do anymore. Next to me stood Junseok, who still wore his Taekwondo uniform as he had also smiled widely just like I did. And I thought that maybe if I had just come with him on that trip, then I wouldn't be left with nothing but pain right now.
He died alone on that ship.
Because I wasn’t there.
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