#journal cuts my beloved <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[reallunargift]

hello fellow adults it is May 19th and to celebrate here is a link to some wfsn (!!!) sexy iberian neighbours that tumblr is too lame to allow

[catboybiologist]

Hi! I'm Sierra. Time for a pinned post refresh.

Otherwise known as CatboyBiologist, or @hi-sierra (my SFW blog [this one is SFW too, but less so]). This page is remaining active, but if you want to find me somewhere else, I use the same username on reddit, Instagram, co-host, and tech.lgbt. This is me:

Trans woman, PhD student in molecular biology, boymoder, shitposter, freediver, hot girl on your phone, hiker, rambler (this post included), tgirl tummy tuesday supplier and enjoyer, former femboy, bane of bioessentialist fuckwads who try to use biology to validate biogotry, flaming bisexual, 196 nanocelebrity… whatever was the first thing that brought you to my blog, I hope it’s enough to get you to stay! I post selfies, hornyposts (minors and people who are averse to that be warned), stuff about the ocean, posts about my growing sense of wanderlust, my adorable lil tortoise, tutorials for transfemmes and GNC people, rambles about science, documentation of my own transition, rambles about transness, rambles about the eroticism of programming a machine to feel arousal, rambles about nature, and random shitposts. Please send me pictures of cute animals in your life!

If you wanna support my science career and my transition, consider dropping a tip here! PhD salaries are notorious for being negotiated to be exactly the cost of living…. And then forgotten about for years as inflation drops that below minimum wage. So I’m always a little strapped for cash. Anything helps!

Links to some of my tutorials and relevant resources under the cut:

I'm tracking my transition, and some people have said they found this helpful! This spreadsheet is generally updated monthly:

Usually, I write a little journal to go with it when it updates- you can find that under the #trans journal on my blog.

If you're interested in checking out some of the things I'm trying to write, here's a post with links to individual stories I'm making:

https://www.tumblr.com/catboybiologist/741010247774306304/writing-consolidation-post?source=share

My femboy guide, written well before I started HRT, but still has relevant info:

A "boyboob" tutorial, aka how to make it look like you have cleavage in an outfit that looks better with it:

A quick and dirty guide to taking better selfies, with a specific emphasis on people who may have stopped hating their body recently due to transition:

And here's a few of my personal favorite little rambles and posts about my transness, in no particular order:

CW for transphobia on this one:

A massive shoutout to @foldingfittedsheets for this amazing art of the lil borgir holding a trans flag:

I adore this so much <3 if you want to support their art, her commissions are open and really sweet!!!!

And of course, a massive shoutout to @whalesharkcat for this lovely pixel art of my tortoise:

I still love this so much, and will continue to into the future <3

For preHRT selfies, search the femboy tag. For post HRT selfies, use the "trans selfie" tag. I've been on HRT since August of 2023, so I'm still very early in the process! Day to day, I present male, but I plan to change that around the 1 year mark.

I guess that's about it! One final note is that I've been alluding to video/podcast style things for a while now. With my aderrall prescription, I've actually put in a lot of research work that might lead to 1-4 of those, so that might actually happen in the near future! No promises of course, life always catches up to you.

And if you liked my previous pinned post better, here it is:

Anyways, if you read this far, thanks for sticking around and bbyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[thefollow-spot]

Denim Wrapped Journal

182 blank pages (7 signatures of 13 sheets)

Suuuper pleased with how this turned out. As a fanbinder, I usually do fics (and TBH it was kinda sad not to typeset anything for this notebook), but after doing a quick-and-dirty longstitch bind earlier in the week, I couldn't get this idea out of my head, and finished it in one day!

Longstitch french-links on the spine my beloved <3

Scrap-denim donated by my stepsister (who cuts the legs off her jeans to make shorts), and kraft paper saved from the recycling.

The inside is regular printer paper, so next time I do I project like this I'm hoping to use something fancier~

[the-dye-stained-socialite]

A flower must grow where it's planted.

*finally comes up for air* hello i opened my sketchbook three days ago intended on coloring pre-existing art and now i have an entirely new piece i didn't mean to make!! whoops

my beloved bee <3 y'all may get more context for this later ;)

item explanation and symbolism under the cut!!!

this piece is designed to look like a clock, with marigold's time slowly ticking down.

the 12, 3, 6, and 9 o clock positions are red honey spoons used by the princess and @thedeafprophet 's jamie! the things marigold was served up on, and the closest they get to people anymore

1 is a honey (or blood) stained glove. from the princess. the only item which breaks the inner ring

2 is an unfinished piece of lace. before marigold was the Love-Sick Captive, they were once the Encoded Lace-Maker

4 is the princess' old perfume bottle

5 is one of jamie's pens

7 is a flower locket, one of marigold's few things from their old life

8 is jamie's bowtie

10 is a raven feather. the one who sent them to the protest, who told marigold to allow themself to be captured

11 is torn out pages of jamie's journal scraps. marigold can't see the handwriting, let alone read it, but that doesn't matter. what matters is that they belong to jamie. they know the words by heart

and of course, the item in marigold's hand is some of jamie's own hair. the only item fully inside the inner ring

marigold's normally pristine bow is beginning to look ragged here

[puckpocketed]

as promised here is my follow up ask on PLD and the caps!! (this time...as a doctor 😎)

first of all thank you so much for the detailed response you gave my first ask. it confirmed a lot of suspicions i had about his supposed character issues and his usage in LA. obviously he's not a perfect player (few are) (except nicklas backstrom, my beloved), but seems like there's a disconnect between the way the media/fan narrative paints him and what's actually happening on the ice and in the locker room.

second of all!! just some kinda ramble-y thoughts based on some of the things you said in the first ask. this is not organized well and i'm sorry (but hopefully it's helpful info to you as you come over to caps land for a bit this season)

(1) Takings Shifts Off. totally agree with you that pld is and always will be viewed through the lens of The Shift. there are definitely players that regularly take shifts off and don't get dogpiled for it, esp. during the regular season (...see Ovechkin, Alex...especially in his old man era! gotta conserve energy). i am very curious to see if pld is like ovi in that he takes shifts off sometimes during the regular season but never the playoffs. from the little we've seen of pld in the playoffs my impression (esp when he played for CBJ) is that he elevates his game. i'm curious to see if he's really got that second gear...but caps gotta make the playoffs first.

(2) A Driver of One's Own. very interesting that in the answer to the last ask you said pld is not exactly the kind of player who drives his own line. this caught my eye bc it's a bit part of the problem w/ finding a center for ovi with backy gone...nowadays, O can't fully drive his own line anymore. he's just not fast enough, regularly (though he can turn it on in key moments). the legs just aren't there as much anymore, he can't really carry the puck in the way he used to, etc. BUT!!! he still has the best shot in the game (sorry auston), so absolutely ELITE triggerman. i'm wondering if pld could like...meet him halfway, i guess. like if TOGETHER they could drive the line. Hmmmm...

(3) Power Play!! everything you said about pld on the PP is promising. if he thrives most net front, then i genuinely think that position is there for the taking. i'm sure they'll try him in the old backstrom/kuznetsov QB spot on the right halfwall but there is a 0% chance our coach doesn't try a few things with the PP, including putting pld in different spots. i wouldn't be surprised if we started off having a weak PP that found its groove as the season went on.

(4) HCSC. our head coach is going to do literally everything in his power to make pld succeed. very communicative coach. last season he started out with an up-tempo system, and then switched to slower defense-first once he realized his personnel was just too slow/old to really pull all that off. with 1/3 of our roster now turned over and filled with players in their 20s, we're gonna see a VERY different capitals team from last year. i'm sure there will be growing pains but...they mystery is exciting, instead of terrifying, for once!!!

third of all!! just wanted to say thanks again for the detailed response to the third ask, and welcome to caps-land. it's a fun time over here. hope you're really looking forward to seeing what the hell our chaotic gremlins are going to do (as long as it makes penguins fans rage and cry, i am happy!!)!!! :)

okay this reply is getting crowded so ill just stick it all under the cut. here is a fun preview:

the media+fan narrative disconnect is SO real!!! i knowww with the amount of players the league has to cover, the sheer length of a regular season and all that happens during, plus the whole....society-wide erosion of journalism as a field... it can be hard for media to keep up, but it's been pretty startling to see their fallibility so... plainly? don't think i have the One Final Truth about Dubois but i think we're likely closer to it than anything the mainstream narratives are saying. i do get that their profits and clicks per/ are greatly increased via if they have a bent toward sensationalism... podcasters, youtube creators, people tweeting... they kinda have to operate like this because thats what the (gags) market and algorithm and audiences crave. does NOT mean i like it. ugh.

bleak reflections on journalism aside, im sitting here and gorging myself on this ask ouhhh thank uuu (for those playing along at home here are manifesto 1 and manifesto 2) and nodding along SO vigorously to all of these... we're having GALAXY brained discussions on here the likes of which spittin chiclets could never even dream of....................

(1) agreed agreed. he MUST be horse-bonded to his team i truly believe this with my whole heart (as in, he's gotta know his role + be comfy). otherwise, no other comment. I DID make that meme though because i was having a laff about Ovechkin conserving energy lkajsdkljajkl

(2) SUPER inchresting that you mention Ovi's lack of footspeed... i know a failhorse who can provide this 👀 we may be cooking something here... more than the sum of their parts kind of vibe?? Dubois has the youth and speed and muscle... he's just been hamstrung by quality of wingers.... and if as you say Ovi needs a hand carrying the puck; well.... 👀👀👀 don't want to put all my eggs in that basket though, I think it would be unfair of us to demand that of him... BUT if it works... oughhhhh i AM hopeful. SO hopeful.

(3) obsessed with this faith in your power play coaches (<- voice of a guy who watched ducks hockey) and their willingness to change things up is soooo nice to hear. NOT a fan of teams bashing their heads against a wall when their special teams clearly aren't working.

(4) and finally, I'm loving everything I hear about Spencer Carbery. i think Dubois has the allure of an wounded animal in the wild (a horse, even) or perhaps a moody teen girl with a hidden darkness in her heart <3 what im saying is, if he doesn't work it out now he's probably always gonna be one of those players every coach looks at and thinks "I could fix him". Carbs on record saying he could tame this wild creature??

link, archive link

hooting, hollering, etc.

Thank you for such a wonderful, warm welcome!! Everyone in caps land has been so lovely... the vibes.. the VIBES!!! peace and love for pens followers but i did in fact choose a side in your Foreverwar ... (my hockey girlbestie actually likes both teams which i find SO fun. the pens are my babygirl-in-laws!) anyway my heart does not divide.... it only swells.... much like the beaugtiful and noble salary of any 30 y/o RHD going into free agency <3 i have enjoyed chatting to caps fans like yourself immensely, and i look forward to hitting the trenches with everyone during regular season !!!

[jasmine-tea-latte]

JTL's long but not as long as it could've been review of Netflix's ATLA

So.

I’ve finished watching the Netflix adaptation of Avatar: The Last Airbender and I have a lot of thoughts. Because despite some of the more questionable changes, I overall enjoyed this as an adaptation.

I wish I could say that I was surprised by the criticisms I'm seen so far, but unfortunately, I’m not. As much as I adore the OG series for being one of the greatest animated shows (or television shows, period), it’s been placed on a pedestal over the years and any adaptation of it will always be held to an impossibly high standard. And for better or for worse, a lot of fans have their nostalgia glasses on when it comes to the show, so any deviation from the source material is going to receive some form of backlash. I say this as someone who clearly still loves the show 19 years later, otherwise I wouldn't be here writing about it, ya know?

Anyways, if I had to give it a grade compared to the OG series, I’d give it a B- or a C+. If I’m grading it as its own thing, I’d bump that up to a B+ or A-. There are some elements (pun not intended) that definitely should have been kept in, and some changes that I thought were done well.

TL;DR – I had fun watching it even during the parts that made me cry, and the parts that made me say “… well that was a decision.” I’d love to see the last two books be adapted as well, if for no other reason than to meet Toph Mothereffing Bei Fong and see all of Team Avatar together.

(Also because I’d LOVE to see The Ember Island Players, especially if they managed to work in a few fun cameos. Can't you picture Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson as Play!Toph and thee Dante Basco as Play!Zuko, hamming it up for all it’s worth? Shut up and take my money!)

(And of course, the Last Agni Kai for obvious reasons)

So I’d recommend at least checking it out if you’re interested. I’d also like to recommend that if you do, watch it from a pragmatic standpoint that it’s a condensed adaptation, not a shot-for-shot remake.

Some things that I liked, and some that I didn’t are below the cut:  

(SPOILERS, obvs)

Aang – I really liked this version of him, and though his actor’s still young, I thought he embodied the upbeat, playful side well. I also liked that they removed his one-sided crush on Katara, and – don’t shoot me for this – if they went with Kat@ang later based on how they did their characters in this first season, I wouldn’t be entirely opposed if it’s built on actual friendship and not an unrequited crush. (Still Team Zutara for life, but I don’t think that I’d *hate* it if the show went in this direction.)

Katara – I thought her actress did great when it came to portraying the nurturing, sensitive side. What I didn’t like was them removing nearly all of her feminine rage. Let her be angry! Let her lose her temper and be hot-headed! This post sums it up nicely. That being said, I do think she did well enough with the direction she was given. Here’s hoping we’ll see our girl eff some stuff up if we get Seasons 2 and 3.

Sokka – Fantastic and sarcastic. I really liked his actor’s interpretation of him, and it definitely felt more in line with the character we all fell in love with during the OG show.

Zuko – out of the main cast, I think his performance was the best. He had to step into a major role, taking over from a beloved performance that is still hailed as one of the greatest redemption arcs in modern media with a lot of expectations riding on his shoulders, and I think that his actor knocked it out of the park. It’s different from Dante Basco’s interpretation, obviously. But as I watched each episode, I kept thinking, “there’s our grumpy fire boy.” The scene where he’s throwing the temper tantrum over losing his journal, while Iroh’s standing back and watching? I thought to myself, “this boy is the worst, he’s perfect.” Plus the flashbacks to his life before scarring were done well, and even though I knew what was coming re: the Agni Kai against his father and subsequent banishment, I still got emotional.

Also, regarding the Agni Kai – on one hand, I feel like his absolute refusal to fight back was such an integral part of that scene and understanding who he is as a character. That being said, I didn’t *hate* that in this version he was pushed into defending himself, albeit by holding back. That one shot where he hesitates to attack Ozai, only for his father to use that same move against him moments later… oof.

My ONLY complaint with this version of Zuko is that he didn't say "honor" once.

Other thoughts I had:

🟣 I really liked that we got to see more of the Air Nomads and life at the Southern Air Temple prior to Sozin’s attack. I also liked the explanation the show gave of having all the Air Nomads gathered together for a festival celebrating the comet, which makes more sense if they’re all (allegedly) under one roof.

Additionally, witnessing the genocide itself… I was crying. Especially during the final showdown between Gyatso and Sozin, and the realization that we were witnessing Roku’s (former) best friend slaughter one of his other closest friends.

But why wouldn't they send the children out on the flying bison to escape instead of having them all cornered?!

🟣 I really enjoyed getting to see interactions between Ozai and Iroh, which was one of the biggest missed opportunities in the OG show.

🟣 MY GIRL JUNE. That is all.

The part where she flirts with Iroh was also a nice flip on what happened in the OG show, with his covert pervert crush and all. Plus Zuko’s face when she calls his “dad” cute? Peak Zuzu. Also, poor Iroh hahaha.

🟣 Suki! I really liked the Kyoshi Island episode, plus her awkward flirting with Sokka by kicking his ass.

🟣 I really wish the whole subplot of Kya’s necklace hadn’t been cut, tbh. The flashbacks involving her were good, and as devastating as it was actually seeing her death, it does hammer home the point what a horrifying experience that was (side-eyeing you, everyone making the jokes about Katara always bringing up her dead mother.)

🟣 THE SCARF SCENE. Nice try, Netflix, but I know better than to get my hopes up again from 5 seconds of slow-mo. Did I still screech when it happened, though? Ofc I did!

🟣 The twist with the 41st Division was bittersweet and I may have (okay, definitely) cried.

🟣 Combining Jet’s subplots with the Mechanist’s and putting them in Omashu wasn’t too bad. I do wish the message of “not everyone in the FN is evil” from Jet’s episode had made it into this version, tbh.

🟣 Overall, I liked Jet + the Freedom Fighters. Also, props to his actor for capturing the pretty boy / f*ckboi attitude well.

🟣 Loved Chong and the hippies, of course (SECRET, SECRET, SECRET TUNNEL, YEAH!) and I don’t mind that they were included this early.

🟣 I loved the change to the Cave of Two Lovers and having Oma and Shu be lesbians.

🟣 I feel like if the show’s renewed for a second season and we come back to Omashu, there’s a chance they could revisit the COTL with Katara and Aang this time around.

🟣 The random lady smacking Zuzu with a broom – “how dare you hit that child?!” – was hilarious, and Dallas Liu’s facial expressions of “wtf” and “fml” were a thing of beauty (starts at 1:40 in the video below)

🟣 CABBAGE MAN! I just love that they got the original voice actor, hamming it up and screaming at the sky.

🟣 I LOVED the Blue Spirit episode, and all of the flashbacks, plus the voiceover about masks and seeing past!Zuko contrasted to present!Zuko, as presented in this gifset? RIP my heart.

🟣 The flashback to Lu Ten’s funeral and showing Zuko being the only person to join his uncle, sharing a sweet memory of his cousin while Leaves from the Vine plays? Beautiful. Ditto to the flashbacks of Iroh standing up for his nephew prior to the Agni Kai and the scenes of them getting ready to set sail to search for the Avatar. “I don’t need a babysitter.” “How about a friend?” how about excuse you I did not ask for these emotions how dare you.

🟣 I actually liked the inclusion of Ozai and Azula + Mai and Ty Lee. I also loved the opening of Ep. 3, showing how she was able to infiltrate the team of rebels. RIP to Kevin Tran (in advanced placement), though.

🟣 I loved that Katara rallied the women waterbenders and they were able to help during the Siege of the North. I also liked her reaction when she's talking with Yugoda in the healing huts and realizes why she's been sent there. It gave us a glimpse of the fiestier / headstrong Katara we all know and love, and if the show gets renewed I hope we'll get to see more.

🟣 I really enjoyed them giving Aang and Zuko a few minutes to talk / form a connection after he was unmasked as the Blue Spirit. That was nicely done.

and finally...

Nothing else to add, just chef's kiss.

(gif source)

Anyways! I might make a more extensive list of my personal pros and cons, but for now, I’d still recommend giving it a shot.

[lumiereandcogsworth]

favourite belle headcanon(s)?

oohhh my beloved girl….

these got long so i’m putting them under the cut 😁

one i think about all the time is how she kind of becomes a forever student. and by that i mean, once she becomes ✨royalty✨ she gets in contact with the headmaster and other professors at the university of paris and she just like. always studies there. i think her & adam live in paris sometimes too so she gets to be in classes occasionally. but she just CRAVES knowledge and wants to learn EVERYTHING. by the time she’s older she probably has like every possible degree you could get there. like literally i think she’s like a pokémon trainer; gotta collect ‘em all!!!!

and of course she’s always working on the education system as queen, trying very hard to get more schools built, create laws that mandate it for all children - INCLUDING GIRLS!!!! and she’s just. soooo involved in education. she loves studying and learning and she wants to make sure no one has to grow up deprived of it the way she was. (because not everyone has a cool papa who taught them as much as he could and encouraged them to read so much !!) so yeah just. all things education✨ i have a wip i need to revisit that’s set when adam & belle are first married and she’s back from spending time with her tutor and she starts rambling about all the things she’s learned and adam’s listening with heart eyes and then she stops and apologizes for rambling and he’s like no i love it tell me more !! and it kinda makes her choke up because no one’s ever loved her for that amazing mind of hers….🤧

another one i really love is that i think she’s very clingy/snuggly in bed. and i don’t think she realized how much she loved being held when she slept until adam held her and she felt so SAFE. i think because she’s always been so independent, always had to fend for herself, she just didn’t realize how much she actually liked having someone to protect her — even if there isn’t any actual danger while they sleep. just knowing he’s holding her, it kind of helps her to let her guard down. which she needs to do just as much as adam does!

when she and adam travel (which is very often) she keeps diaries of every place they go. it started with their honeymoon, when adam gifted her, on their wedding day, a journal to take note of their adventures. and she loves it so much that she keeps it up! she has DECADES worth of journals in the shelves of her study back home, by the time she’s older. she loves to make notes about the food and the people and the whether and the flora & fauna and all of it!!! she loves exploring SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!! her and adam usually have to do some kind of Royal Thing™️ while they’re anywhere, but they also take time to go off the beaten path and explore and meet local people and just dive in wherever they are. and i like to think that, in their universe, the Travel Diaries of Queen Belle remain very well-preserved throughout time, and are some of the coolest artifacts in french history 🤌

she love baking and cooking !!!!!! she doesn’t get to do it very often since being the queen and having a million other responsibilities, but it was always one of her favorite things to do both for and with her father. and she LOVES the giant ass castle kitchen, i just know she goes crazy in there at least once a week. it’s the most fun when she’s pregnant and having wild cravings. she makes insane concoctions that literally do not taste good but she loves them. i have another random little unposted scene of adam finding her in the kitchen, acting like a mad scientist cooking three different things at once, and adam gets suspicious and asks if she’s pregnant again lmao. she laughs and says she isn’t, she just happened to be reading a cook book recently gifted to her and she couldn’t decide which to try first so she’s making 3 at once!!!!!!!! (but not combined. THAT would definitely be the indicator of another little one)

speaking of her babies!!!!!!!! gosh what can i say about my mama belle headcanons? one big and important one that i have is that she elects to nurse her own babies. which, as you can imagine, is super uncommon for a QUEEN to do. i elaborate on it in This Fic, but essentially she just couldn’t bring herself to adhere to the tradition of a wet nurse. i think because she wanted to find a way to be closer to the mother she lost as an infant, she wanted to do everything her mother did for her before she died. i think her pregnancies, ESPECIALLY her first, were when she thought about her mother the most. because… that was the most time they spent together 🫠 her mother died when belle was only three months old!!!! and she knew, of course, that her mother nursed her. i just think she felt this deep need to honor her & connect to her this way. and adam was originally advocating for a wet nurse, purely thinking about time efficiency, how busy belle is and how much work time she’d have to give up to do this, but after hearing her lament her mother and cry that she couldn’t be here to help show her how to be a mama… he understood. he knows how desperate one can be to connect to a lost mama :( so he supports his queen and they never hire a permanent wet nurse for their children! (there was a temporary one for a FEW times they HAD to go on small trips when they had a baby and they just couldn’t take her or him, but it was only under that kind of urgent/dire circumstance.)

i think belle is an absolutely iconic and very involved queen, but early on i think she struggles with it a lot. one of my favorite things to think about for her is how like… she was an outcast in the village, but she’s STILL an outcast in royal society. like i think she had this secret hope that this new position in life would be the answer; that she’d finally find her place. and she does eventually! but at first it’s rough. adam believes in her wholeheartedly and he LOVES that she is queen, but the rest of their court doesn’t fully take to her as easily. it’s strange enough that she came out of the woodwork, not from royalty, not even from a prominent noble family as far as they can tell! but As Queen she’s so much more involved than any of them could have anticipated. the older court and council members recall adam’s mother and grandmother, both very inactive queens (because they were very abused and disregarded by their husbands…) and therefore are confused by this sudden shift (especially because they KNEW of adam’s delinquency prior to meeting her, so they can’t fathom how he’s changed so much and is so supportive of her) and the younger court and council members just have no idea how to respond. they’re all willing to play the part and respect their queen, but then she’s… actually in meetings and actually sharing ideas and plans and making decisions and it’s like ???

and not even to mention, her ideas are very ahead of her time and forward thinking — and they don’t care for that shit at all! it’s just all very strange. and french court people are gossiping little pricks and so people talk about her a lot, and she feels just as isolated and different as she did in the village. she struggles a lot with it early on. and adam does everything he can to support her and comfort her and believe in her. but he also takes a lot of the blame for how she’s treated, because he feels like it’s his fault for bringing her into this life. even though she obviously chose all of this willingly. so, it’s just TOUGH. but time does carry on, and eventually belle does have the respect of her court, at least the vast majority of it. she does find her place in the end, it just doesn’t happen as swiftly as she had hoped.

gosh, okay, one last note that i will make much lighter: she loves loves loves loves loves LOVES to read to her children. which is obvious, i know, but oh my gosh. she just loves it. she loves when adam reads to them too, but i think something fills her heart so completely when she’s sitting with them gathered on the floor, or she’s in bed and they’re snuggled around her, she’s just whisking them away to all these adventures. reading was always her escape, and i think she likes that, for them, it’s just a way to expand their dreams. she loves teaching them so much, she loves watching their little minds expand with curiosity and creativity. she never really expected to become a mother, because she wasn’t going to let herself settle in that village, so now that she IS one, i think she just loves giving them the whole world. she loves listening to them read, too. she loves listening to them talk and sing and play and laugh. she loves being a mama so much more than she ever even considered. i think because she always attached that kind of thought to being in a loveless marriage in the village she’d be stuck in forever. but there’s so much love between her and adam, it always multiples with each of their three little babies. and she didn’t have to give herself up for any of it. she gets to be a brilliant queen; a student, a teacher, a leader, while still being the best wife and mama (and daughter!!) to the ones she loves the most. i just love writing her happily ever after so much. i think she was really beginning to lose hope in that village, and i love how it all changed, and that adventure in the great wide somewhere is always right at her finger tips :”)

[its-short-for-jackalope]

WOW! THAT WAS SOME LORE, HUH? :D

reposting this meme bc it's true and bc I really like it, lol

I have quite literally been scribbling notes on a scrap of paper like a madman while rewatching TGOA part 3 as many times as possible, just jotting down all the mindboggling information we've been given, and some less direct stuff that I could be reading too much into but is fun and neat even if it doesn't amount to anything crazy and galaxy-brained, lol.

So click/tap below the cut for rambles about the final part of Pulp Musicals episode 3

The Ghosts of Antikythera ⚓️

Names, Names, Names!!!

Hey, might as well start with all the new names we've gotten!

The captain of the Antikythera — the ghost ship from 'someplace else' — is Addison Arvad.

Kal (my beloved/beloathed ❤ ) is Kalfu

The Traveler we met in TBS is Sia 💖💖

Ahlaam is another Traveler. I adore her already, and not just because she saved Rose.

Dakkar is... somebody. As expected, I've been going crazy in my dms with @man-down-in-hatchet-town, and she believes Dakkar is probably inspired by/based on Captain Nemo? 👀

King(?!) Itzal is... probably bad news! Kal's the one who calls him a King and he is obviously pretty loyal and devoted to him, and wants to impress him (aww), so methinks Itzal is maybe not so good???? (I am also a proud supporter of Brooke's Dylan Saunders as Itzal campaign, lol)

The Blazing World is home. It's where the Travelers and the Antikythera's Searchers (rip) are from, it was destroyed once—but is being rebuilt?—and Kalfu and Itzal seem to want it gone for good.

Lincoln Island is the mysterious island our heroes on the Ellen Austin are approaching at the end of the episode, the place Ahlaam sent Rose and the Antikythera to via orrery.

Quick *Approximate* Timeline

Eh, what can I say? We got numbers and I decided to do a tiny bit of math about it.

1874 — the Antikythera & the Ellen Austin

🔴 YOU ARE HERE

🎶 When are we? 🎶 Well, Morgan Reese informs our time-traveling heroes that, uh yeah lol, last he checked the year was 1874. What a funny question from a bunch of rapscallions!

Captain Arvad's logs from the Antikythera start in January 1874, so we know the Searchers were out and about in this same year. Their disappearances were recent and the ship hasn't been empty for all that long, I don't think.

1865 — may this monument stand forever

On this site in 1835, Sir John Herschel and Anna Hanover launched the first brick satellite, the Sagitta, in what was known as Township Number Nine. Erected to commemorate their bravery, to thank them for their gift to all mankind, may this monument stand forever.

Dedicated August, 1865.

1864 — the dark angel appears

A desperate AJ makes his ill-fated deal with Kal in exchange for his crew's safety during the Battle of Mobile Bay.

Damn the torpedoes.

1835 — the beginning of our adventure

🎶 IT IS EIGHTEEN THIRTY-FIVE 🎶 and the Great Moon Hoax and The Brick Satellite both happen in this year. Things were so simple back then!

1829 — the Blazing World is destroyed

In 1874, we are told (first by Arvad's journal, and then by Sia) that their home, that the Blazing World was destroyed 45 years ago. If my math is right and they're not hippity-hopping too much in time (they have time travel capabilities so idk for sure) that would put the destruction of the Blazing World in 1829.

If the world being destroyed is also the Event that Kal alludes to in Gunpowder and Rum, pt. 3 ("Your powers are returning and you still don't remember what happened? 😒") AND it's the one that left Margaret without her memories and powers, then... could Margaret have been feeling lost, alone, and disconnected with her phantom pain in New York for 6 whole years before the Stratfords wrote the hoax that would bring the quartet together??? 🥺

And while we're on the subject of time passing!

If Sia and Kalfu and everyone besides the quartet has gotten to 1874 the long way 'round... (which I think is the case if Kal snarked at Sia for hiding Margaret in the future—if he has a sense of the future in relation to the world and time, I'd say this also implies he & the others have a pretty consistent present?) ...have they aged? Or does their magic also lengthen their lives? I imagine it would be mentioned if Sia was visibly older, and since Samuel described Kal as looking ~40 years old, then how could he be younger than the war he's been in? lol. But idk, this is just food for thought!

Kal Loves His Lore Dumps, Doesn't he? This one's mostly about Margaret <3

"You've proven quite elusive over the years... We've searched across the seven seas... I suppose it's only fitting that I find you here by chance, looking for an orrery! I'd have settled for the ship, what's its name? An-ti-ky-ther-a. But you will be quite the prize. It's you that will seal our victory! A ship from the Blazing World would have been quite the quarry. But you? That could end things once and for all!"

"The ship, the orrery, they don't matter now. Not when I can dispatch the two biggest traitors in history with just one blow!"

Seems like our girl is pretty special~ 🥰

I mean, of course she is, she's our Margaret, but if Kal is willing to let the Antikythera go to get her instead, and he's so convinced that taking her out will win the war... our girl is Pretty Special™ right? Maybe she's a princess or something, or maybe her Radiance is just that heckin' strong. idk, but I'm excited to find out either way.

I'm also wondering if there's a connection between Margaret and the orrery/orreries... If Kal thought it was fitting to find her when he was after the orrery, does that mean something more? Could Margaret have created the orreries and/or the magic behind them? 👀

...actually maybe this isn't such a good and fun thing. 😅😟 Things don't usually go very well for special and important characters—what is the saying, tragedies love heroes? I mean, Margaret has lost her powers and memories once already, as well as her home and whatever family she may have had before. I know all our pulp blorbos have been in dire straights a few times now, but I don't want them to get MORE DIRE than this!

Kalfu, Sia, & Margaret's history

Kal: High marks for cloaking the fleet, but seriously—

...

Kal: Come on, it's a Traveler reunion.

...

Kal: Just a drink between three friends.

...

Sia: Oh, you were once a man that I trusted. Tell me, where has he been?

...

Sia: Itzal poisoned your mind!

Kal: Itzal opened my mind!

...

Sia and Margaret: *powering up*

Sia: Hey, Kalfu!

Kal: Huh? Ugh, not again.

Kal: *team rocket fog's blasting off again*

I think it's pretty safe to say that, once upon a time, these three were once close. Maybe they were friends and peers, or maybe Kalfu was once Sia and/or Margaret's mentor with that "high marks" comment. Whatever the case, they used to be allies who trusted each other.

I think it's also safe to say all three of them are/were Travelers. Obviously Sia is, and Margaret probably is/was one as well, since she and Sia have a badass combined attack (that I'm betting they used against Kalfu ~45 years prior). As for Kal... I don't know how the radiance and the fog fit together exactly, whether they've always been separate or the fog is a dark bastardization of the radiance, but it seems like he is on equal footing with Sia as far as magic powers go, and he can teleport like they do—AJ witnessed this at the Battle of Mobile Bay, and Samuel did (kinda) on the deck of the Ellen Austin. I don't know if that's the only qualification for being a Traveler, but it's worth mentioning.

It seems like Itzal was a pretty big factor in this trio splitting up—for whatever reason, Kal turned his back on Sia and Margaret to follow him, or perhaps Sia and Margaret left Kal behind when he wouldn't leave with them. I don't know, but I want to—I have questions!!!

Sia and Itzal — Future sight?

Kal (to Sia): You know, for someone with precognitive abilities, you sure like to cut things close. 😒

...

Kal: How I wish King Itzal was here to witness this. Or did he already know? Eh.

There's not much to say about this, really, I just think it's interesting.

But it does make me wonder if Sia *knew* that sending Margaret and the others to Hanover in 1874 would lead Margaret to the Antikythera and help her regain her memories, even if Sia couldn't see much more than that. Like, if she knew that Kal would be there, I don't think she would have put Margaret at risk like that when she was still vulnerable. Unless she was betting on Margaret figuring things out before Kal could make his move... gah, who knows! (Matt. Matt knows.) We do know that Sia can't see everything, though—she knows that the crew of the Antikythera are gone but has to ask Kal what he did with them.

Also, obligatory "yikes 😬" at the idea of having an enemy (King Itzal) who could possibly see your attacks/plans before you make them. That can't make this war any easier!

Fogging the vortices, you say?

Kal: We've been fogging the vortices for decades. There was bound to be an Antikythera sooner or later.

Vortices.... plural for vortex, yeah?

"A mass of whirling fluid or air, especially a whirlpool or whirlwind."

Is one of these vortices located here in the Sargasso Sea? Is that why Rose already knows plenty of ghost stories about these waters, why this is a strange place that'll one day be dubbed the Bermuda Triangle? Where are the other vortices??? How many are there??? What are they, exactly???

Okay, but what about the gates?

Kal: A war for a world of power and might

Sia: A war for a world of courage and light

Kal: Fought over decades

Sia: Over ascension

Kal/Sia: No chance of surrender, no chance of redemption

I'm just throwing darts here, but I feel like 'ascension' has to do with the gates that have been alluded to a few times now?

First, in TBS, Sia told Margaret that she couldn't take her to the gate until her memories were back. Then in part 2 of TGOA, Kal said something about the Antikythera's orrery leading him to the first gate.

I don't think these gates are the same thing as the vortices—if the bad guys have already been 'fogging' them, then Kal wouldn't need an orrery to find them.

The gates probably lead to the Blazing World, right? Kal and Itzal want to destroy the Blazing World for good, which is why Kal was trying to get the orrery, to get to the gate, to ascend to the Blazing World and turn it to dust once and for all.

Travelers and Symbols/Elements/Associations

To finish up, here's one of the things I've noticed more recently. We have four magical characters now who seem to be at similar levels of power and might all be/have been Travelers, and maybe it's just a fun bit of flavor rather than anything Extremely Vital to the plot, but they each seem to have their own kind of... niche?

Lemme run through 'em real quick.

Kalfu—

● Want a drink?

● Gunpowder and rum, too strong for some! 🎶

● And poison... is kinda my thing.

● Non-lethal fog, my latest brew

Kal's easy to figure out—he's been pretty clear with his gunpowder and rum (delicious!) and once he revealed it he's been very cheeky and upfront about his use of/preference for poison too. He also stands out as the only person wielding fog, but I'm sure that'll change as we delve further into the dark and into this war we're learning about.

Sia—

● "Was that sunlight shining in the sphere?"

● We're here to light the fuse

● Lay another hand on her and you'll go down in flames

● I will always be that feeling burning under your skin

hehe okay, Sia is the reason this whole section of my post exists lol. I noticed the references to fire in enough of her lines/lyrics in part 3 that I thought it couldn't be a coincidence, and then I looked at the others. I just think it's neat!

Maybe these lines are just nods to the fact that light can burn as well as illuminate—Kalfu would probably know, hah—but it is fun to think that maybe we could see our first and dearest Traveler friend whip out some cool fire magic later on—when she's not duking it out with somebody on a wooden boat, lol.

I'd love that for her, tbh.

...especially because alcohol is flammable. :)

Ahlaam—

Narrator: In a blinding flash, a woman materialized, and with a single motion, she pushed the water of the room with her mind

Okay, I fully admit this is mostly just a reason for me to make another waterbending joke. Ahlaam's appearance in this episode wasn't really long enough to give us much information about her, but I mean we also haven't seen anyone else do anything with water until she came along, so... if we see her do more stuff like this and she has more associations with water in episode 4 onwards, I will feel pretty smart. 😌

Margaret—

● the moon

● the sea

● astronomy

we might not know much about Margaret's magic beyond how brightly it glows—which isn't unique to her—and what she's been able to do with it, be we do know that she has a connection with the moon, of course.

I think we could also argue that she has a pull to the sea—mostly because of the view from her window and the rooftop, overlooking the water. Learning about the Searchers and the fact that Kal was looking for Margaret on the sea supports this connection, but again, that doesn't really single her out from the others.

Margaret does have an appreciation for astronomy, but even that might not be super unique, if her people have orreries on every ship and they all look up to the sky. However... my brain is still chewing on a possible connection between Margaret and the orrery, because of what Kal said. It would be pretty rad if she was the one who designed and crafted them, figured out that magic. So idk, that could be something.

If her memories are returning, maybe we'll see her really start to shine amongst her fellow Travelers as she recalls more about herself and brings together the person that resides in her memories and the person that losing her memories made her into.

phew, okay! this is a long post and I am now very sleepy, lol. I'm sure I missed a few things—I didn't take any *literal* notes during parts 1 & 2 and it'll be a few days before I get the album and lose my mind again—but maybe there's a few things I managed to catch that y'all will enjoy.

As always, feel free to reply/reblog with your own thoughts!!!

[laddersofsweetmisery]

So excited to start the books I've picked out for October. I'm especially eager to read this little beauty. Two chapters in and I'm appreciative of the amount of research and care taken to tell the lesser-known elements of the behind-the-scenes narrative of Mary Shelley's masterpiece, Frankenstein. She's so fascinating. More so, I am always floored by anything new I learn regarding her mother, often regarded as the first feminist, Mary Wollstonecraft. Monsters: Mary Shelley and the Curse of Frankenstein, by Dorothy and Thomas Hoobler, is a biography of sorts exploring the lives and work of Mary Shelley’s haunted circle of literary contemporaries—with a particular focus on the four poets and friends with her the stormy night she was inspired to write her gothic tale. Also featured in the book are those who influenced her magnum opus, Frankenstein, but were only in the room with her in spirit.

Poets and friends from that stormy night:

Lord Byron was that famous English Poet described in the book as “mad, bad, and dangerous to know.” He’s attractive, intimidating, and has a thing for scaring his guests. After frightening his guests with a reading of Fantasmagoriana, a collection of German horror stories, during a stormy night, he proposed a contest where they all take a shot at writing a ghost story of their own.

Percy Bysshe Shelley, or “Mad Shelley,” was fascinated by the occult and married to our equally fascinating Mary Shelley. He wasn’t as popular for his work during his life, likely because it was cut short when he drowned at 29, but his work gained notoriety after his death. He is considered one of the major English Romantic poets.

Dr. John Polidori is credited for the first and most influential novel about a human vampire: The Vampyre. His haunted figure is likely inspired by Byron himself. The two didn’t really get along. The Vampyre was also written as part of the ghost story contest proposed by Lord Byron.

Claire Clairmont was the mother of Lord Byron’s illegitimate child and Shelley’s stepsister.  

Before we make our way into Mary Shelley’s circle, we are introduced to her immutable parents William Godwin and his wife, who I’m casually obsessed with, Mary Wollstonecraft. No joke, their love story will bring you to literal tears, my god. I felt genuinely sick reading about her death and how those who very clearly despised her feminist views took her death as an example of the weakness of her sex. I hope she haunted those fuckers to madness.

Wanna read with me this October? I'll be reading the following books over this month, feel free to pick them up, too! This year, the classics are calling my name 🎃🕯 Since starting Monsters, I'm really craving more so I’ll be reading and rereading works that relate to it in some way :)

Monsters: Mary Shelley and the Curse of Frankenstein, by Dorothy and Thomas Hoobler (We’re starting here, obviously.)

Frankenstein, by Mary Shelley (We just have to!!!) Available on Kindle Unlimited

An Enquiry Concerning Political Justice, by William Godwin (We just have to read from the parents who raised our beloved Mary Shelley.)

The Wrongs of Woman, or, Maria, by Mary Wollstonecraft (Again, we have to! Plus, it’s one of my favorites. I need to share it with everyone who crosses my path.)

Fantasmagoriana, “Tales of the Dead” (Why not read what inspired that stormy night writing contest?) Available on Kindle Unlimited

Lord Byron: Selected Letters and Journals, edited by Leslie Marchand (I wanna know more about this fella. He is also mentioned in The Wager. This one might be a little hard to find, but I’ll post what I can.)

The Vampyre, by Dr. John Polidori (Let’s end our October reading about a lil vamp and finding the comparisons to Byron.) Available on Kindle Unlimited

I'll be posting my thoughts and pages that stick out to me at the end of each day <3

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

1, 12, 14 for Lucius and Driscoll? 👀

HELLO FRIEND THANKS FOR ASKING!! referring to this post.

since this all qualifies as Deep Lore Hours (which i love!! you're the best!!), and i'm a wordy person, have a cut checkpoint on your dash:

1. What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)? 

lucius actually happened because i asked claire for a starting blirb [sic] in ms. mecoli's creative writing class in high school (remember that???), and she gave me a bit about lucifer standing outside a churchyard with a big black dog*, and i thought "hm. bit on the nose," (for the weird little christian fiction thing i thought i was writing, which has obviously since mutated Significantly), so i changed it to lucius. originally he was the Antagonist™, and human although he didn't realize he came out of a test tube just like bewinged lili did, and all i knew about him was grown-up white dude with black hair.

obviously, he has since undergone SIGNIFICANT revisions (lol. lmfao, even), but embryonically he started with a modified name!! (i went digging through my archives, and i do in fact still have the index card with claire's pencil writing below my pen request! wild.)

(i don't actually remember when i decided he needed wings too, but i think it was around the time i realized i wanted my protags to be all Not Exactly Me, and therefore boy protag would be Different, and then he got his black wings!)

*the big black dog has also made it back into this version, after falling out of the intermediates!! vanya, my beloved, ...

for driscoll, i vaguely remember the purple hair probably being first (i recall chewing on finding The Right Name for a while?). to confirm, i went into THAT archived notebook (red, helpfully labeled "LIMINAL PREWRITE," with "LANGUAGE AND COMP" obliterated beneath thanks again, high school).

weirdly, the first four (4) pages of the driscoll thing is NOT the character profile (that shows up on page 5, and does mention purple hair/brown eyes/physical appearance), but one of these OC ask meme type things, transcribed into the notebook. hilariously, the very first question is "If they want to buy a firearm, what would it be for?" which. omg. (my answer eventually got to "no they wouldn't lol," but it's wild to see how that slow revelation happened on september 3, 2017, when i was first figuring this kid out.)

so apparently first for driscoll i wrote some random character finding Q&As, and then i have the story of their misplacement, and then the physical details, which: wild, on all fronts, to me. (it's a good thing i keep my notebooks in an archive refrigerator tower, or i would've bluescreened on driscoll 100% haha.)

12. What have you found to be most difficult about creating art for your OC (any form of art: writing, drawing, edits, etc.)? 

oooh, good question. my lucius answer is probably biased, because i hadn't started doing the Bitch Journal while i was working through that drafting/those revisions (and i have the object permanence of a fruit fly), but i THINK my biggest difficulty was figuring out the right balance of ~Interiority~? and i still don't love where i left that querying draft at (now, after four years' distance, lol), but getting the right balance of Thoughts and Reactions down on the page was difficult for me, which i suspect was because i've been too in his head for so long, if that makes sense? like the things he notices and what he narrates on imply enough of the interiority to me that i don't see gaps readers do (because, shocker, they HAVEN'T been living in his head since uh. 2007.). and i think i cut away some of the interiority in my preliminary Wordiness Passes, which nerfed me, but i started fixing that in the fourth draft!

my driscoll answer is just. a web of angst lol. and i know most of it is Living Situational/Circumstantial, so we're going to Ignore That and just answer with the Actual Textual Difficulties.

so: driscoll's Actual Textual Difficulties are mostly that i started out writing thing as "someone i'd like to be" with regards to kindness and gentleness and how much they care about people, but somehow i had to backpedal and get a Character Development Conflict in there, which is hard when my starting point was "very good noodle." i think i'm getting there!! but nesting competing wants into a late-stage draft without breaking anything (or, y'know, while finding stealth-broken things that i didn't think were), is a Trying Time™. i'm leveling up about it! enjoying the leveling up!! i'd be leveling up faster if i wasn't burning all this emotional bandwidth on a bullshit living situation! we're fine!!

14. If you had to narrow it down to 2 things that you MUST keep in mind while working with your OC, what would those things be? 

OH FUN, i percolated on this on my WHOLE BIG WALK yesterday, thank u for this enrichment

lucius: first, physicality is key. he has to be Very Aware of where he is in physical space/how much of it he's taking up (because an 18+ foot wingspan really doesn't fuck around, and only half the time is he somewhere that his dimensions are accommodated). when his awareness slips, it (1) has to be for a good reason and (2) usually results in something breaking, and both of those are fun to play with >:D

second, what he notices needs to read like More Than Human--he's got raptor vision, and he's spent half his life around other hybrids with combat training, so he's very visually Intense™ and good at reading a wide variety of body language. and because he's Friends with these combat trained hybrids, he's asked a lot of questions, and he notices a lot more than human people would.

driscoll: first, child, you have physical limitations, and you ignore them at your own peril. i put this kid in a shifting monsterscape armed with pretty much just a flashlight and the distinct ability NOT to be able to run away from their problems (because their lungs don't cooperate), so both driscoll and i have to be very aware of the Exit Plan for any situation they get themselves into (and they get into a Lot of Situations).

second, another dual-wielding type of thing: driscoll is both weirdly in tune with In Between and mostly cannot tell people that, so how i write about them navigating has to change depending on who they're with. hazard is the only one they're fully open with at the start, and they have to be carefully guarded with the other walkers/crew, AND they have to tell newly misplaced just enough to inspire confidence without revealing so much that they (the newly misplaced) will be Suspicious if they stick around to become townspeople themselves. it's a Lot to keep in mind (perhaps uh. More. than i kept in mind. in drafts two and three lol. we're working on it.)

THANKS AGAIN FRIEND THIS WAS SO FUN!!!

[charliemwrites]

charlie, my beloved, it is ceil!!

❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

Ceil my beloved 💕💕

❄️: a 5-6 chapter Hannibal-themed ghost fic. He’s a disgraced former SAS operative turned serial killer, and reader is the newbie Price sends into the lion’s den to interview. They need his expertise to track down terrorists or another rogue operative but he refuses to speak to anyone other than that poor recruit.

As for who would write it best…. I think there’s a lot of talented writers who would make masterpieces out of a concept like this. You included!

🌿: heres a list of things I do for block/burnout that I find helps

-I take a 2-3 day break after publishing something to reset my brain. I do other creative stuff in the meantime like puzzles or junk journaling. If I come up with an idea in that time, I write it in my notes and save it for later

-never delete! Cut stuff out for sure and post in a separate doc. Go back to that doc every once in a while and see if you get inspired by anything there. Also good if you’re trapped in a scene but you’re attached to what you’ve written so far

-tiktok! I’ll bebop around fandom tags or theme tags to see if my brain latches on to anything (bikertok, farmtok, etc)

-outline by writing headcanons like you’re talking to fandom friends or making a Twitter thread. Even if you don’t send it or post it, I find it keeps me on-theme/vibe and also sometime sets plot points

[sugar-omi]

honestly all that was sooo what i needed to hear rn bc a girls been STRESSED so thank you <3 😭

i'm gonna major in biotechnology! i went to a votech and that was my trade there and i loved it so i wanna continue studying it. not totally sure what job i want yet so i don't know how much schooling i'll do but yeah! :D

BIOTECH??? THAT SOUNDS SO COOL N SO COMPLICATED please i literally had to google that shit bc idk what it entails but this is some big brain shit, n all i gotta say is good luck n i am cheering you ON!!🎉🫶🫶

although i think you got this in the bag already. anyone with the balls to do something so advanced. is a very smart n strong person. from what im reading on google this is some really cool shit, no matter what direction you go with it. n you have your work cut out for you, but i know you got this!!

so don't doubt yourself!! you got this!!! your brain is huge n you are powerful!!!!

n of course!!! i figured saying something like that would help with anyones anxiety, because really, its the pressure (even if they're not actually pressuring you) and the overwhelm of questions and expectations that make the future so stressfullll

*ramble utc because i... cannot help yapping i guess LOL and while i'd usually be embarrassed and delete my ramble n word vomit, but i figure someone else readding this may appreciate the relatability of what i have to say about my fams reaction to my plan after hs, and find some comfort in my word, if thats not to presumptuous

because i decided to take a gap year (it's been a year since i graduated, for reference), and everyone freaked out. my mom n uncles first reaction was "yeah well, you won't go if you do..." before they came around n agreed with my reasoning. and my dad was all "if i had it my way, you'd go full time--" (mind u, he likes to brag that he worked n went to school full time AND partied.... he did not finish college LMAO) and when i graduated, said to me a MONTH. AFTER MY GRADUATION. "if you're not going to college any time soon, go into the air force."

and when my extended family would ask my plans, and i only had a short "i'm just gonna take a break right now, figure some things out, work... and by then i'll have come to a decision." because i was tossing around the thought of art school, and then i thought abt getting an english degree to be either a teacher or go into writing/editing, journaling or whatever... but was also tossing around the thought of psychology and even real estate. my ideas for my future were absolutely jumbled, and i was torn between what would make money, what i loved, and what i was interested in that i thought could be a career.

it's tough. especially depending on your financial situation yknow, so your thought process always leads towards something profitable but also wanting to do something you enjoy, maybe even love, but not wanting to burn out and tarnish your beloved hobby/hobbies.

like while i did have people who supported me upfront, and never doubted my plan, it's the small things too yknow. because for months my dad's words haunted me, i felt like i wasn't doing enough. or when i met family, and they asked how it was going, or what i was doing now, i felt disappointed that my answer was always "i haven't been doing anything. just been sleeping, drawing, writing..." or eventually that and "practiced driving.. n that's about it."

or when i'd talk to close family members, and i admitted i was going through a hard time, my mental state finally falling on me now that i didn't have to be strong n power through school. i even got sick a couple times, because my body was finally feeling the stress. even now, i feel a mental lag, a fog. but i feel clearer, a bit.

but yknow, the looks and the "you said that last time" or "i think you're lying" is tough.

but at the end of the day, if not working for the summer, or not going to college for a semester, or 2, or 3, or a whole year. or if going part time, or whatever you're doing... and it benefits you, and it benefits your mental health. then do it, don't listen too much, don't feel too guilty.

because if you need it, just like i needed the time to rejuvenate, then don't listen to anyone else. don't force yourself to do anything. because if you have the ability to take a break now, do it. you're not doing this because you're lazy, or selfish, or unambitious. or anything like that. you're taking that break, you're taking this break right now, for future you.

because if you don't take it now, when will you take it? and when you do take a break... will it be at the cost of your health? will it be at the cost of something greater? when the break comes, will it come when you're being handed the gold medal you've been fighting for.. and then it slips out of your hand just like that.

anyway.. do whats best for you. what you need. don't worry about figuring things out too fast either, because in fact, i've been plotting this moment of my life for about 10 years, genuinely, and i still had to revise it. still had to come to a conclusion because even with all that plotting, it doesn't plan for the hard times. or the 'you' you are right now. you will be someone else next week. and you will be someone entirely different 2 months from now.

take your time. because if you jump into something, and are unsatisfied, or "waste" time doing something other than what you "should be doing", the time still passes.

if you "waste time" anyway, waste it on yourself. not others expectations. or wishes. or their dreams.

and once enough time passes as well, no matter what you do by then. the questions do stop coming. the weight of the future, once you get there, is suddenly not so... big. intimidating.

you do not need a grandiose plan. if you are content with the future in your mind, that is enough. because at the end of your life, who will sit in that chair and ponder the life you lived, and weight it's satisfaction, if not you?

[ineveryspaceandtime]

it's 2.5 hours to 2024, so here's a fun lil game to end the year, with a template i found on ig!

tagging: @a-reality-dream @mrsnarl @uhbasicallyjustmilex @subtle-as-an-earthquake @shineswithyou @depressedraisin @haemoglobinheights @daddy-long-legssss @ballad-of-what-could-have-been (if you're not tagged but would like to do it too, please do so! 💖)

i don't journal as much as i'd like to (new resolution perhaps?), so i'm taking this opportunity to reflect on some of the things i've checked off on this list below the cut!

tried new foods / travelled to a new place / went to the beach / went to the mountain / watched the sunrise / watched the sunset / dyed your hair

everything above i did when i travelled to Bali! we had a LOT of good food (ayam betutu my beloved <3), including a seafood dinner on a beach during sunset; and caught the sunrise from one of the higher points in Mount Batur. but the absolute best part of that trip was that i was with my sister, and though in all honesty i was terrified we'd end up arguing (because the third member of our party cancelled, and in my head i saw him as a buffer between my sister & me), we didn't—we had a peaceful time and it was just. pure fun 💕

made new friends / laughed a lot

this one is a little bit of a surprise, because i'm an introvert, but this year in my efforts to Be Brave and Ask Questions, i've approached one particular person (who isn't from my department) a number of times, and over the year we've shared a lot of laughter & good times. unfortunately this year was her last at our workplace, but she left me a lovely little note, which i will cherish forever, i'm not even exaggerating 🥺💗

finished a book

i finished 11 books this year (out of the 32 i'd hoped to have read. sobs), but i'm checking this one off the list because of one highly enjoyable experience of devouring a book in 2.5 hours while lazing in the pool on a unicorn floatie. (was i thinking about miles and his floaties the entire time? yes, yes i was)

went to a concert

i went to three this year! the one that's most special was the strokes, because 1) i'm a baby fan, and 2) i went during the busiest work week of the year. (i completed all my work ahead of time so i could fully enjoy myself!) the crowd was amazing, the vibes were immaculate, and i had the best time, even though i was vibing so hard i ended up spilling my drink down my own leg. it's also the concert where julian imitated alex. lol

gained weight

i'm the heaviest i've ever been, and i've accepted it as part of growing older (goodbye metabolism, you were so good to me). on the bright side, i think i might also be the fittest i've ever been!

danced

dancing w my favourite people before a concert, and seeing another initially subdued group noticing us & then letting loose was one of the top 5 experiences of the year for me tbh

made a big decision

i was asked sometime in october whether i'd like to join one of the key committees next year, and i told my boss that i'd like to take on the challenge, bc it was something i knew i would enjoy doing. even though it didn't work out in the end (because a new KP has just joined us, and her credentials are far better suited to the role), i'm glad i didn't immediately reject the offer, just because it would have meant more (and more difficult) work.

grieved

strangely, something i'm finding more difficult than grieving the people i've lost is grieving the life i might have had, even though the decision i made was one i knew to be right.

learned new skills

i had an idea to streamline some of our work processes, and i figured out how to do it all on my own. i love you online tutorials <3

if you've stuck around this far, gosh. why. also, love you <3

[gutsfics]

Top 9 Shows

i was tagged by @inlocusmads at the begining of the month and then. promptly forgot about it.

anyway i tried to do a mix of live action and animated shows even though i watch more animated shows bc i didn't want to look too much like a child

Santa Clarita Diet - this show is for the bisexuals fr. Shelia and Joel are total couple goals. Netflix is cowards for canceling it

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine - there's an episode where Quark, Rom, and Nog accidentally get sent back in time and become the Roswell Aliens and Quark tries to convince the humans to do even more capitalism than they were already doing, and its called Little Green Men. Show of all time.

Rise of the TMNT - the best TMNT show (imo) soley for the fact the turtles actually have different designs for once. also its insanely beautifully animated and really funny. also fun fact but Mikey's voice in this (done by Brandon Mychal Smith) is my voice claim for Devi.

The Muppets (2015) - my favorite show about making a show, and hands down the best Muppets show to come out of the last decade. which is like an insanely low bar bc they've been doing a steady nosedive since Disney bought them. BUT. honestly this is how a modern Muppets show should be done. compared to other modren Muppets shows, theres so much energy. i wish Up Late With Miss Piggy was a real show

Gravity Falls - i love when a show has exactly enough episodes to tell the story it wants to tell and doesn't get cut short or run on for too long. also Alex Hirsch faking screenshots of Fiddleford writing the journals was genious and every showrunner should do stuff like that instead of changing the plot bc the fans found out what was going on a season early. theres this shit called forshadowing, and it's good if your audience can pick up on it

Community - one of my binge shows for when i don't feel like doing something else or watching something new. i usually stick to the first 3 seasons though. Shirley is the best character and i wish the writers knew what to do with her more often. there was so much going for her and the writers just dropped the ball so hard

Bojack Horseman - my other binge show and my second favorite show about making a show (and movies). it's not often that a character's arc ends with them gaining weight, as a sign of healing or otherwise, so Diane holds a really special place in my heart, especially bc there isnt a single joke about Diane's weight gain at her expence. also Todd is best boy.

Breaking Bad - Jesse Pinkman my beloved

Invader Zim - i was actually born the same year this. when i was old enough to actually watch the reruns, i was terrified of it. now its my favorite show. i have a gir hoodie :3

tagging @raytaku @lame-kid-on-couch @enki-ankarian @mydemonsdrivealimo

[rattytshirtspaintsplatteredjeans]

Three ways to read the Riordanverse's series

Whether you are a new fan or a returning one, you might be confused about the reading order of Riordan's books (especially since there are more than twenty of them, even without counting extra books - with those there are nearly forty). If so, you are in the right place. Here under the cut are 3 ways to read the Percy Jackson series, each one providing a different experience. (this took me so long to make you have no idea)

Obs.: You don't necessarily have to read the extra books, but some of them contain short stories that are relevant to the plot and beloved by the fans. I heavily recommend you read at least those (which will be marked with a ☆)

Obs. 2: We usually use a 3 or 4-letters acronym to refer to Riordanverse's series and books. Thus, the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series would be PJO, The Lightning Thief (1st book of the series and the one they're adapting right now) would be TLT and so on. I'll try to avoid them but if you see them that's what they mean lol.

Obs. 3: Rick Riordan is currently releasing a new 3-books long series due to the show release which is being branded as a continuation of PJO. However, they contain spoilers of the second main series. Thus, they'll be marked as PJOX here for identification purposes.

Obs. 4: A lot of people will stop reading the series because they can't get through the first two books of TOA. I beg you to keep reading. The third and the last book of the series are two of the best ones Rick Riordan has ever written (with the last book being my favorite of his by far).

Recommended for: anyone

Release order

The order in which the books were released. Pretty straightforward.

The Lightning Thief/TLT (Percy Jackson and the Olympians/PJO)

The Sea of Monsters/SoM (PJO)

The Titan's Curse/TTC (PJO)

The Battle of The Labyrinth/BotL (PJO)

The Demigod Files (PJO Extra ☆)

The Last Olympian/TLO (PJO)

The Ultimate Guide (PJO Extra)

The Red Pyramid/TRP (The Kane Chronicles/TKC)

The Lost Hero/TLH (The Heroes of Olympus/HOO)

The Throne of Fire/ToF (TKC)

The Son of Neptune/SoN (HOO)

The Kane Chronicles Survival Guide (TKC Extra)

The Serpent's Shadow/TSS (TKC)

The Demigod Diaries (PJO/HOO Extra ⁠☆)

The Mark of Athena/MoA (HOO)

Percy Jackson and the Singer of Apollo (PJO Extra - hard to find in print especially if you're not from the US, I genuinely recommend you to look for a PDF version)

The House of Hades/HoH (HOO)

Percy Jackson's Greek Gods (HOO Extra)

The Blood of Olympus/BoO (HOO)

Percy Jackson's Greek Heroes (HOO Extra - afaik it doesn't exist in print in Brazil, might also be the case for other countries)

The Sword of Summer/SoS (Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard/MCGA)

Demigods and Magicians (PJO × TKC Extra ⁠☆ - Collection of 3 short stories and a crossover between PJO and TKC. Hard to come by in print, I recommend you to get the eBooks. You can also read the 1st story = The Son of Sobek between MoA and The Singer of Apollo, the 2nd story = The Staff of Serapis between HoH and Greek Gods and the 3rd story = The Crown of Ptolemy between BoO and Greek Heroes)

The Hidden Oracle/THO (The Trials of Apollo/TOA)

Guide to the Norse Worlds (MCGA Extra)

The Hammer of Thor/HoT (MCGA)

The Dark Prophecy/TDP (TOA)

Camp Half-Blood Confidential (TOA Extra)

The Ship of The Dead/SoD (MCGA)

Brooklyn House Magician's Manual (TKC Extra)

The Burning Maze/TBM (TOA)

9 From the Nine Worlds (MCGA Extra)

The Tyrant's Tomb/TTT (TOA)

Camp Jupiter Classified: A Probatio's Journal (TOA Extra)

The Tower of Nero/ToN (TOA)

The Sun and the Star: A Nico di Angelo Adventure/TSatS (Stand-alone)

The Chalice of the Gods/CotG (PJOX)

Wrath of the Triple Goddess TBR 2024 (PJOX)

3rd PJOX Book TBR 2025 (PJOX)

Chronological order

Recommended for: anyone

The chronological order of the stories, mainly following the guide made by taetaae_v, eliascsc, riordanverso and percyjstan (all on Twitter). The only thing NOT included is the first story from the extra book "The Demigod Diaries", as it contains spoilers/heavy foreshadowing about the first series, including the end. If you are reading for the first time, I advise you to not buy the book until you finish PJO and to read the story afterwards. If you are rereading the series, the story is chronologically located before everything else, so start by reading it.

Refer to the release order to know when to read the extra books (outside from the stories included below), since they contain content that can't really be placed. Also, Rick Riordan is not the best writer when it comes to consistency, so some of the short stories might actually contradict what is said in the main book series when placed where they are, even if it is the only reasonable time to place them.

(For rereaders) 1st Story (from The Demigod Diaries)

The Lightning Thief/TLT (Percy Jackson and the Olympians/PJO)

The Sea of Monsters/SoM (PJO)

The Titan's Curse/TTC (PJO)

The Battle of The Labyrinth/BotL (PJO)

Percy Jackson and the Bronze Dragon (from The Demigod Files)

Percy Jackson and the Stolen Chariot (from The Demigod Files - alternatively placed between TTC and BotL)

Percy Jackson and the Sword of Hades (from The Demigod Files)

The Last Olympian/TLO (PJO)

(For 1st time readers) 1st Story (from The Demigod Diaries)

Percy Jackson and the Singer of Apollo (PJO Extra - hard to find in print especially if you're not from the US, I genuinely recommend you to look for a PDF version)

The Staff of Hermes (from The Demigod Diaries)

The Lost Hero/TLH (The Heroes of Olympus/HOO)

Leo Valdez and the Quest for Buford (from The Demigod Diaries)

The Red Pyramid/TRP (The Kane Chronicles/TKC)

The Throne of Fire/ToF (TKC)

Son of Magic (from The Demigod Diaries, by Haley Riordan - not strictly part of the series but adds some depth)

The Son of Neptune/SoN (HOO)

The Mark of Athena/MoA (HOO)

The House of Hades/HoH (HOO)

The Blood of Olympus/BoO (HOO)

The Chalice of the Gods/CotG (PJOX)

The Serpent's Shadow/TSS (TKC)

Demigods and Magicians (PJO × TKC Extra ⁠☆ - Collection of 3 short stories - The Son of Sobek, The Staff of Serapis and The Crown of Ptolemy - and a crossover between PJO and TKC. Hard to come by in print, I recommend you to get the eBooks)

Wrath of the Triple Goddess TBR 2024 (PJOX - might take place before The Crown of Ptolemy)

3rd PJOX Book TBR 2025 (PJOX)

The Sword of Summer/SoS (Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard/MCGA)

The Hidden Oracle/THO (The Trials of Apollo/TOA)

The Dark Prophecy/TDP (TOA)

The Burning Maze/TBM (TOA)

The Hammer of Thor/HoT (MCGA)

The Tyrant's Tomb/TTT (TOA)

The Ship of The Dead/SoD (MCGA)

The Tower of Nero/ToN (TOA)

The Sun and the Star: A Nico di Angelo Adventure/TSatS (Stand-alone)

Greek Mythology First order (Personal Favorite)

Recommended for: those who want to read the main series first before going to the Egyptian/Norse mythology spin-offs.

Besides Rick Riordan's three main 5-books series about Greek mythology, there are also two other 3-books series about other mythologies and following other characters. Although there are crossovers between the main series and the other two and they sometimes reference each other, there's absolutely nothing lost by reading the main series first and you can do that without receiving any spoilers.

The books are organized following the chronological order of the series, so PJOX comes before TOA. The extra books that aren't relevant for the story are added at the end of their series. You can also read TKC between PJO and HOO and MCGA either before or after TOA (TKC can actually be read at any point, but MCGA needs to be read after HOO).

Greek Mythology

The Lightning Thief/TLT (Percy Jackson and the Olympians/PJO)

The Sea of Monsters/SoM (PJO)

The Titan's Curse/TTC (PJO)

The Battle of The Labyrinth/BotL (PJO)

The Demigod Files (PJO Extra ☆)

The Last Olympian/TLO (PJO)

Percy Jackson and the Singer of Apollo (PJO Extra - hard to find in print especially if you're not from the US, I genuinely recommend you to look for a PDF version)

The Ultimate Guide (PJO Extra)

(Optional) Demigods and Magicians (PJO × TKC Extra ⁠☆ - Collection of 3 short stories - The Son of Sobek, The Staff of Serapis and The Crown of Ptolemy - and a crossover between PJO and TKC. Hard to come by in print, I recommend you to get the eBooks)

The Lost Hero/TLH (The Heroes of Olympus/HOO)

The Demigod Diaries (PJO/HOO Extra ⁠☆)

The Son of Neptune/SoN (HOO)

The Mark of Athena/MoA (HOO)

The House of Hades/HoH (HOO)

The Blood of Olympus/BoO (HOO)

Percy Jackson's Greek Gods (HOO Extra)

Percy Jackson's Greek Heroes (HOO Extra - afaik it doesn't exist in print in Brazil, might also be the case for other countries)

The Chalice of the Gods/CotG (PJOX)

Wrath of the Triple Goddess TBR 2024 (PJOX)

3rd PJOX Book TBR 2025 (PJOX)

The Hidden Oracle/THO (The Trials of Apollo/TOA)

The Dark Prophecy/TDP (TOA)

The Burning Maze/TBM (TOA)

The Tyrant's Tomb/TTT (TOA)

The Tower of Nero/ToN (TOA)

Camp Half-Blood Confidential (TOA Extra)

Camp Jupiter Classified: A Probatio's Journal (TOA Extra)

The Sun and the Star: A Nico di Angelo Adventure/TSatS (Stand-alone)

Egyptian Mythology

The Red Pyramid/TRP (The Kane Chronicles/TKC)

The Throne of Fire/ToF (TKC)

The Serpent's Shadow/TSS (TKC)

(Optional) Demigods and Magicians (PJO × TKC Extra ⁠☆ - Collection of 3 short stories - The Son of Sobek, The Staff of Serapis and The Crown of Ptolemy - and a crossover between PJO and TKC. Hard to come by in print, I recommend you to get the eBooks)

The Kane Chronicles Survival Guide (TKC Extra)

Brooklyn House Magician's Manual (TKC Extra)

Norse Mythology

The Sword of Summer/SoS (Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard/MCGA)

The Hammer of Thor/HoT (MCGA)

The Ship of The Dead/SoD (MCGA)

Guide to the Norse Worlds (MCGA Extra)

9 From the Nine Worlds (MCGA Extra)

[autumnslance]

Fic Stats Breakdown

Rules: give us the links to your fic with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and finally the fic with the least words.

Stats page my beloved. When I feel uncertain about myself, going there to see how much I’ve written, and how much it’s been interacted with, is always enlightening.

Also where you’ll see the accurate count of Bookmarks; you still can’t see info on private Bookmarks, but you get the actual number of them.

Tagged by @rinzukodas if you want to do it, by all means!

1. Most Hits: Unexpected. It's the one with the most updates, so makes sense.

She made it halfway across the room to the large man when she stopped and frowned. ’Was Thancred flirting with me?’ She always had such a hard time telling, and he seemed to have a mischievous reputation and way with women–especially if those visions were true and not some strange aetheric fever dreams. Aeryn shook her head. Thancred was a gregarious man, objectively handsome–the open cut of the oasis style shirt and jacket he wore tonight flattered his athletic form–and they’d fought alongside one another a few times now. He had been looking out for her, naught more, his perceptive skills noting her discomfort.

2. Second Most Kudos: Unexpected again! Cuz that and Downtime compete for my most read and popular fics. I should update Downtime.

3. Third Most Comments: Downtime! I tend to reply often, so my comment counts are high, but Unexpected is #1, while Bearing Sins of the Past is #2 for comment threads.

“I believe the Exarch wished Urianger’s aid with some arcane matter,” Alphinaud said, as he joined his sister. “They are like to be occupied for several bells. Why don’t you join us?” He said. “We were going to explore the Crystarium’s new nightlife, before retiring to our quarters--and knowing Alisaie, continuing to stay up half the night.” “Me? You’re the one wanting to gab endlessly as you write every stray thought into your journal,” Alisaie countered. Minfilia looked between them, bewildered for a moment--then she smiled, realizing the honest affection beneath the banter. She nodded. “I...think I would like that.”

4. Fourth Most Bookmarks: Rogue’s Prelude. An earlier longfic (37.2k words) of my headcanon of Thancred meeting Louisoix, Papalymo, and Yda as a youth in Limsa Lominsa.

The docks were busy; the tide had come in recently and had brought a number of ships with it, divesting cargo and people into the city. Thancred enjoyed the sights, sounds, and even some of the smells as he wove between fishermen stalls and merchant carts, seeking unfamiliar faces. He didn’t even look as he brushed past a few Thavnairian traders, listening to their sing-song language as he cloyed a purse from one animated fellow, arguing with the bosun of the ship they had just left. He should really pay more attention to his surroundings when in a foreign city. As should the older elezen man Thancred noted, leaning on a staff while a pretty blonde hyur woman consulted a map. Her elder listened to her with patience--or perhaps he was simply half-asleep in the sun and heat. Thancred ambled toward the pair, falling in behind sailors moving crates from the pier onto their ship, now that their passengers had disembarked. As he moved past his mark, he deftly nicked the contents from the old man’s belt pouch-- --and found himself skidding a few fulms down the dock, a brief flash of light and a sound like a small, localized clap of thunder ringing Thancred’s ears and causing stars to burst before his eyes. A few people nearby were startled; he thought he maybe heard someone laugh.

5. Fifth Most Words: Bearing Sins of the Past. A 25.1k longfic that unexpectedly came out of various FFXIV Write prompts about my WoL Aeryn's backstory; her bio-father's involvement in the Dragonsong War, and the Dragoon that hid that knowledge for twenty years to keep her safe--and bury his own guilt.

X’rhun narrowed his eyes. “I agreed to the secret for your damnable Ishgardian politics,” he said. “But it’s just us out here. Are you truly protecting Aeryn—or yourself?” Alberic turned, and X’rhun braced himself, as he was certain the dragoon was about to strike him. Instead, Alberic remained in a state of tension, staring without seeing at some middle distant point. “You ever carry something so long it’s become woven into you?” he asked quietly.

6. Least Words: Savior, the very first thing I posted to Ao3. 262 words, 2nd person POV about the aftermath of the Final Steps of Faith. There are technically shorter works, but they tend to go into my prompt or specific topic-chaptered fics.

You couldn’t save them. They had sacrificed themselves, to ensure you lived, to ensure this moment. They had come, once again, to your side. To end the war. To protect the city. To save a friend.