#jokes n jokes
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
i think my favourite part of the ratfish episodes are the fact that it's the most accurate portrayal of friendship i can think of. here's all your friends but they're anonymous, make each other laugh. it's always one specific thing that would make no one else bat an eye that makes you get made by someone else. katie made a joke about anti-depressants and immediately got clocked by rekha. zac mentioned publix and grant went "that's zac." grant chose a bette midler song and ally went "gay ass. probably grant." zac didn't get any vibes at all from steven and realised he knows his friends better than this. i do not know this person in real life.
#you know what it is. youd know it with your friends too. they say one specific thing and you go yeah thats x lol#we couldve guessed them because of their jokes n references we know of as celebrities but what they got clocked bywas UNINTELLIGIBLE for us#game changer#the ratfish#zac oyama#ally beardsley#grant o'brien#rekha shankar#katie marovitch#brennan lee mulligan#jess ross#sam reich
9K notes
·
View notes
Text
yuuji smiling and sukuna making a face like That did u really think i wouldn't do a panel redraw
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#ryoumen sukuna#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#jjk 264#yuuji#sukuna#god sukuna's face is so priceless he rly does look like a cat at the vet#AND I MISSED HAPPY YUUJI i would read a compilation of every panel of smiling yuuji in a heartbeat#i also missed pink sukuna :') no context n u can almost pretend we r back in the good old days#anyway i debated adding text 2 this because to me it looks like Let's Take Ibuprofen Together#and since thats Sukuna's Thing (tm) i feel like theres a joke 2 b made there with yuuji saying it 2 him#but i decided against it smtimes simple is best#ok my hand is actually showing signs of overuse im done fr the day i PROMIS E FHFJSFJJ#it's just the meat of the palm pinky side and not the wrist so thats a good sign#ill probably b better tmr . no rest fr the wicked stay strong girl
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
you’re borrowing your boyfriend!jason todd’s…
hoodie
it’s big, it’s warm, and it smells like your big warm boyfriend. of course you stole it. luckily jason runs hot..or that’s what he tells you at least. the man gets cold too, but he’d never tell you that. not when you look so cozy in his sweatshirt.
sweats
your favorite thing of his to match with his hoodie. his sweatpants are super warm, super soft, and super baggy. meant for ultimate comfort. jason loves it when you go full out sweatsuit in his clothes. like, loves it. you’re like his own personal teddy bear to hold on to while he falls asleep. who needs sweats when he has you to keep him warm..in his.
t shirt
sometimes, when the weather’s warmer, you’ll steal one of jason’s shirts to thrown on over a pair of panties. you’re oblivious to the fact that this combination makes jason go absolutely buck wild. somehow you’ve never made the connection. but more than once he’s found you sprawled across the couch, watching tv, and ended up going down on you. his head nestled between your thighs as you grip his raven locks. his hands are fisted into the loose fabric of his shirt that you’re wearing. he’s not satisfied until your legs are shaking, your moans intermingling with the wet, borderline pornographic, sounds that he’s creating with his mouth on your clit. he never lets you get him back either, even though you know he was grinding his crotch against the couch, chasing that sweet friction and release along with you. but he always just sits you atop his lap after, kissing your cheek as he brushes your hair out of your face. grips your thigh as he makes a comment about the show playing, your panties long forgotten on the floor.
underwear
you never get very far wearing a pair of your boyfriend’s boxers. for one, they’re pretty loose on you, so you have to roll the waistband a couple times, which just gives jason a prime view of your ass. they also just make it so easy for him to get his hand down the front, his strong fingers expertly finding your clit like he’s memorized a map of your body. which, in some ways, he has. it’s not long before you’ve come, once, twice, almost a third time, and he’s pulling his own boxers off to free his stiff cock. it points out, the tip leaking, and you’re opening your legs wider without even realizing it. he grabs your waist, sliding you closer to the edge of the bed, making sure you’re ready before he slides in, burying himself in you. he bottoms out, and you’re throwing your head back, a third orgasm threatening to crest as he starts up a rhythm. the muscles of his stomach ripple as he thrusts in and out. one of his hands is on your waist, the other slowly snaking its way back down to your clit. your toes curl at the feel of his calloused thumb rubbing circles on that sensitive bundle of nerves. he’s groaning, low in his throat, at the way you look on his cock. it never gets old for him, ever. the way your cheeks flush, how adorable your blown out pupils are when you look up at him. your wet lashes, your messy hair. your entrance clenches around his cock as you come a third time, your hands gripping the bed sheets. jason comes along with you, groaning loudly as he paints your insides with white ropes of cum. he pulls out, wetting a washcloth in the bathroom. the wet, warm fabric feels like heaven against your sensitive folds, your boyfriend wiping away the mixture of fluids between your legs. you feel pleasantly boneless, sinking into the pillows at the head of the bed. your boyfriend cleans himself up after, settling into bed next to you. jason wraps his strong arms around you, and it’s better than any clothes you might steal. but what you don’t know, is that he’d let you steal his clothes anytime.
#okay tag yourself i’m the underwear thief#thinking about boyfriends and the clothing you steal from them#warm boyfriend clothes sound like heaven rn#no joke guys#y’all rockin with this style of writing?#i’m calling ‘em quick fics#quick! trademark it!#—ness’s quick fics#dc comics smut#jason todd x reader#jason todd x fem!reader#jason todd x y/n#jason todd x you#jason todd imagine#red hood x you#red hood imagine#red hood x reader#red hood x y/n#red hood smut#—ness writes#the batboys x you
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
part 4 of a lot funnier in my head than on paper
#before anyone asks its not a series the part 4 is a joke dont go looking#the solver granted me this mental image#definitely not at the right skill level to draw it correctly but i did good enough#nori forgetting her ipod in space and then needing n to launch her into orbit to get it back#yknow now that im actually stopping to think about it v would be the only one of the two in functioning order at this point#or they just waited for n to regen and then forced him to do this#we both know n is fully capable of punting nori into orbit#something something stupid mutt#my hatred for this is growing the more i look at it im gonna finish off the tags#art#murder drones#murder drones n#murder drones nori#murder drones uzi#murder drones flesha#i guess#or#murder drones cyn#serial designation n#one day ill be able to draw n in a way i like#noris text box is supposed to be a rose it did not come out looking like a rose#i dont know how to draw roses help
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
hawkeye and trapper get fake septums
(id under the cut)
[image id: a three-page digital comic about characters from the TV show MASH, illustrated by "druid-for-hire." On page 1, frank burns squints at Hawkeye from a short distance, who is next to Trapper, who is reading a newspaper that obscures his face. "Pierce," Burns asks, "what's on your face?" Hawkeye turns to face him, revealing a septum piercing. "what's what, Frank?" he asks. Shocked and affronted by this breach in army regulations, he shouts, "I can't!! Believe you!! It's not enough for you to disagrace the army uniform by being out of it all the time? You have to go and--and do that! You look like a punk! Or a cow!"
On page 2, Hawkeye, unbothered, replies "Y'know, Frank, I'm finally living up to the Pierce name. I was thinking about going for some ear tag earrings. Maybe I can get a nurse to pull my udders." Frank howls, "That's disgusting!" Turning to Trapper he shouts, "Did you have anything to do with this, McIntyre?" Trapper pulls down the newspaper to reveal that he's wearing three septum rings and says, "I sure did! He stole my look!"
On page 3, Frank says "You're both terrible. Both of your butts are going on report!" while Hawkeye takes out his apparently fake septum ring behind his back. "Report for what, Frank?" he asks; Frank turns to see that the piercing is now missing. "Yeah, what's the matter, Frank?" Trapper says, whose piercing is suddenly missing as well. Frank storms off, yelling "Neither of you can pull the wool over my eyes!! Just wait until General Barker hears about this!" Some time later, Frank is standing next to General Barker, pointing at Hawk. "General, I'm telling you, the hole is THERE!" he shouts. "Go and take a look in those nostrils for yourself!" There is a long and awkward pause. The General did not like that. Hawkeye remarks, "Gee Frank, take a girl to dinner first." end id]
#mash#m*a*s*h#mashblr#mash tv#mash 4077#mashposting#hawkeye pierce#trapper john mcintyre#frank burns#my art#edit: i love when people in the tags are like ''i love how you draw frank''#bc the way i draw frank is ''barely''#this is not a dig on myself this is an observation of the fact#that somehow he lost what little detail he had and became a large vaguely man-shaped hat#also the fun part about writing his dialogue was that i could add as much punctuation as i wanted#to make the spacing work. lol#also special shoutout to my buddy for helping me workshop the jokes n dialogue
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
shitpost bc apparently doing the requests isn't working against artblock, sorry chuuya is currently searching for his hat
#sab posting#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd chuuya#chuuya nakahara#bsd dazai#dazai osamu#skk#soukoku#im soooo funny#im currently sick n barely functioning but i really wanted to finally draw something anYTHING#just imagine sab listening to a 2WW related audiobook and at the same time being on a call with her mom like#'yes im dying i cant get outta bed'#while drawing this sht#my life is a joke
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
I have a headcanon for how Nori intends to catch up on embarrassing her daughter.
#murder drones#Nori doorman#Uzi doorman#serial designation N#murder drones N#muder drones nori#nuzi#cheezy art#stupid jokes
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
guys i think they might be dating
#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#I LOVE LOVE LOVED THE FINALE#EVERYTHING WAS SOOO GOD#THE ANIMATION THE PLOT THE JOKES THE MUSIC#FUCKING HELL#im so normal about them#WE MIGHT GET A NUZI SPINOFF TOO?????#IS THIS HEAVEN.#murder drones#md#md fanart#murder drones fanart#nuzi#uzi doorman#serial designation n#n x uzi#uzi x n#n murder drones#my art#fanart#krita
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
listen I expected literally Nothing from the D&D movie okay, like I can't make it clear enough that I expected the most soulless money grab with a good cgi budget imaginable, I went in having already gone through every stage of grief and landed on acceptance and LISTEN
I fucking CRIED during this dumb RPG movie. it wasn't just "not terrible" it was objectively good with a clever plot and compelling characters and sincere emotional beats. this movie loves D&D so fucking much and it NAILS the "a bunch of goobers try to be cool and accidentally discover The Power Of Friendship And Also Great Violence" classic D&D party vibe. their barbarian's last name is fucking Kilgore and my entire family cried in the theater.
I hope they make twelve of these motherfuckers.
#honor among thieves#dnd#dungeons and dragons: honor among thieves#holga kilgore#she is a BARBARIAN whose name is KILL GORE like who among us has not been in a party with this exact character#some new player who picked whatever they were told was the easiest class and gave them a name that is 98% a joke#and just piggybacked their backstory onto the most experienced player's as like rp training wheels#and then smash cut 60 sessions later and we're all getting choked up over john dingus or whatever#do you motherfuckers know how rarely i cry????? about ANYTHING?????#god it was so good#i am going to watch this an unhealthy amount#i want a separate movie for every red wizard and also one about xenk's backstory#his name is X E N K with an X these writers have played some fucking DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS#do i have to buy dead in thay now?????? i think i have to buy dead in thay now#i literally ran dnd on friday and this movie put me in WITHDRAWAL i want to play some dnd Now
14K notes
·
View notes
Text
when i learned jedi kids r raised communally i suddenly understood the anakin | obi wan conflict so much better omg its only child vs kid with like 8 siblings. obi wan is like anakin ur so fckn stupid (smiles fondly) and anakin is like he thinks im stupid 😡
#star wars#anakin skywalker#obi wan kenobi#obviously there is more to the conflict and anakins being groomed n shit but#yk#its a joke
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
NUzi Sleepover! Through the fire and flames (nightshift hell and my computer breaking down) we finally got this piece done! Very proud of how it came out and all the little extra bits~~
This took SO long but was worth every second!
Had to Nshade it of course, but higher image quality should be up on patreon tonight. Probably gonna make a few small comics there as well.
#illustration#art#digital art#murder drones#murder drones fanart#uzi murder drones#n murder drones#please see our little background jokes#of course uzi would dual-wield#md n#md uzi
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
slasher au doodle dump! I’m having so much fun with these idiots. also tho i try not to info dump too much about the AU cause i worry that im annoying and no one cares but your guy’s questions and comments mean the absolute world to me and I’m so happy you’re curious about them 🥺
dw i WILL be answering your asks—im just slow going.
couple more under the cut but cw for blood and maaaaaaaybe suggestive but I’m also just easily flustered
#hi my name is wyervan and my style changes every 5 mins#was drinking a faygo while i did the first one no joke#rock & rye baybeeee#dca slasher au#fnaf#fnaf dca#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#slasher sun#slasher moon#slasher dca#human sun#human moon#human dca#art#fanart#dca au#fnaf fanart#blood#suggestive#suggestive content#fnaf au#y/n#fnaf y/n#fnaf oc#moon x y/n#sun x y/n#dca x y/n
719 notes
·
View notes
Text
Hats 1
He can wear as many as he wants.
Bonus:
#fnaf#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#fnaf y/n#dca#fnaf dca#daycare attendant#fnaf daycare attendant#security guard y/n#traditional drawing#sketches#my art#do not reupload#fnaf comic#He's so happy#Look at his silly smile. I love how he looks with all those hats on top of his night cap.#Couldn't stop myself from bringing this idea to paper#Sun fully approves silly jokes like these#It's unclear if you will get your hat back.
864 notes
·
View notes
Text
Goodnight kiss ✧
#tf2#art#fanart#team fortress 2#tf2 demoman#tf2 soldier#boots n bombs#averiart#emesis blue#second emesis blue art and its the same scene okay this is a little embarrassing#i think i like this one#dont think this will do well but live laugh love or whatver#cried over this scene while drawing it again no joke#i think its just insane
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
how I feel after sending my friends memes about how much I love food (I’ve got an 3d)
#ed but not ed sheeran#i just want to be thin#light as a feather#tw ed ana#skinandbones#⭐️ve#🐛hungrycaterpillar#@n@ tips#4n0r3x!4#4nor3xia#4norexla#4n4blr#4n4rexia#@n0rexi@#@n@ meal#@na motivation#@na blog#pro @n@#@n0r3x1@#ana jokes#tw ana bløg#anadiet#tw 3d in the tags#eating 🍂#light as a 🍂#light as a feather 🪶#light as a 🪶#🕯️as a feather#⭐️ ing motivation#⭐️rving
800 notes
·
View notes
Photo
The solver is gone (?) They put Bizcuit in a normal worker body. They really didn’t expect him to grow sharp teeth or a tail. He doesn't need to drink oil to live but that won't stop him from trying. (cw: vomiting)
(I actually drew most of this before episode 7, but I felt like cleaning it up a bit and posting it now)
#I am am working on requests I just really wanted to finish this all of a sudden#I made this and now you get to look at it#<- new tag for things i'm slightly embarrassed to post#nuzi fankid#Murder Drones#uzi doorman#serial designation n#nuzi#I'm gonna make a joke character haha *makes a whole serious thing*#it's fun#elio bizcuit doorman#guess he got a tag now#I actually made a vizzy kid too maybe i'll post her#some day#repost fixed some stuff
1K notes
·
View notes