#jims very proud but also absolutely terrified

[honeyxmonkey]

Harley: Jim check this out! *mass destruction*

Jim:

[aziraphales-library]

Hello and thank you so much for your service for all this years! My question can be a little too specific so if fic strike at least some of points it's still cool. I'm looking for human au with heavy accent on Aziraphale and his angelic siblings. It can be something nice and family fluffy, sure, not all in his family is a dicks, but I'm thinking more about something like Aziraphale dealing with years of family abuse and finally relearning how to live without shame and fear; Crowley getting to look at Aziraphale's family close after years of "they are nice we just don't get along" and being utterly terrified; Crowley helping Aziraphale to learn to stand his ground and being all proud when he got it; Crowley and Aziraphale bonding over familial traumas; etc. Also can be with hints of season two, like Aziraphale trying to reconnect with family or saving Muriel (or even "Jim") from same abuse and being all gentle and understanding (and making Crowley proud again). Absolutely no to victim blaming (I mean from Crowley or author pov, from Aziraphale's or family pov sure), preferably without heavy fatshaming, preferably older Aziraphale and Crowley (no to kid and teen aus, meh to college/young adults, yes to 30+ and absolutely YES to 40+). Great if it's longish and kind of plottish fic! Super great if there would be autistic Aziraphale, not cis Aziraphale, in any way disabled Aziraphale, religious trauma, cptsd and did I mentioned supportive Crowley? Btw it can be not Aziraphale-centric fic, if it's just romance or even Crowley-centric but themes are there, I'm interested. Anyway as I said it's probably too specific so anything that "kind of close" will do. Thanks in advance!

Here are some adult human aus in which Aziraphale's family are Not Nice...

The Long Road Home by TawnyOwl95 (E)

Aziraphale Heavensby only knows about love from books. So when he's given a chance to experience romance first hand he grabs it as hard as he can. Even if it can't last. Even if Aziraphale’s father has very definite plans for his future. Plans that certainly don't include Anthony Crowley.

Drink You In by FinnsKeeper (G)

Aziraphale Fell owns a rather popular bar in Soho London. His life is relatively calm and predictable until he meets Anthony Crowley one fateful night. When a first date goes wrong, Aziraphale has to take measures to protect his newest patron. Anthony's gratitude quickly morphs into something deeper, and Aziraphale has to battle his own demons to determine if those feelings are true or just a product of his impromptu rescue.

Someone by Diminua (M)

This was a kinkmeme prompt and as usual I can't do better than to paraphrase the OP : Aziraphale is a frumpy, middle aged man, who's closing in on 50 : he's spent his entire life alone, mistreated by his family, and living like a modern times hermit in his familiar, reassuring bookshop. He thinks it's too late for passion. But he hopes that, maybe, he could find a companion for his latter days. Crowley has spent his entire life having a wild time: parties, sex, rock n roll, all that jazz. He flew through the 80s, the 90s, the new millennium like a car on fire. He thought he had time, thought he'd be young and surrounded by people forever, thought with fling after fling after fling, someone would find him. Someone would look at him and choose him. But no one ever did. To paraphrase (again) - they turn to an arranged marriage company. And they fit..

Dating in the Dark by miraworos (E)

Anthony J. Crowley, owner of a failing joke-shop, and Aziraphale, bookshop proprietor with an overbearing family, meet as contestants on a blind dating show. They form an instant connection as roommates but soon find themselves at odds as they compete to win the top spot, and the favor of the same lady.

The Ghost of Husbands Past by A_N_D (E)

Az always knew that he’d be thrown out the moment his father found out he was gay. He hadn’t expected to be declared dead though - or for his husband to believe it! But their marriage had been a foolish teenage impulse (not to mention invalid in America), so when Az moved to a small town far upstate New York to start his new life, he moved alone. The kindest thing he could do was let Crowley mourn and move on, not be shackled for life to a now disabled partner. Tony Crowley never recovered from losing his best friend, his childhood sweetheart, his better half. He’d been drifting ever since; no plans, no hope, no money - and now, just before Thanksgiving, no job either. Given the stark choice of freezing to death or accepting his sister’s invitation to join her upstate, Tony reluctantly lives out the Hallmark cliche of Recently Unemployed Person Moves to Small Town for Christmas. It’s a time of hope, love, and family. It’s time for Az and Tony to find each other again.

love like yours (will surely come my way) by CCs_World (T)

Dr Zira Fell is a new professor of theology at St Beryl's University. His first day there he meets the mysterious and enchanting Dr AJ Crowley, an art history professor and a painter. They almost immediately become friends, and spend most of their time getting lunch together, talking, drinking wine, making art, and falling slowly in love with one another. Featuring cameos of everyone's favorite (and least favorite) characters, gratuitous descriptions of paintings, long text messaging conversations, and one cranky cat.

- Mod D

[blue-saaaaargent]

I posted 6,005 times in 2022

That's 1,223 more posts than 2021!

32 posts created (1%)

5,973 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@carfuckerlynch

@canwriteitbetterthanueverfeltit

@elytrians

@shamebats

@yussaerrenis

I tagged 6,003 of my posts in 2022

#sp - 1,788 posts

#wwdits - 903 posts

#our flag means death - 507 posts

#wwdits spoilers - 454 posts

#marvel - 438 posts

#guillermo de la cruz - 388 posts

#the umbrella academy - 344 posts

#misc - 337 posts

#nandor the relentless - 276 posts

#stranger things - 241 posts

Longest Tag: 131 characters

#to be very clear i am fully psyched that they changed viktor’s character to make it a more comfortable acting experience for elliot

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Thinking about how so much crazy shit happened this season that no one is even talking about klaus making an enemy of the entire amish community and having to run for his life from them

1,416 notes - Posted June 28, 2022

#4

Not the kamala khan international boyfriend exchange program 💀 she gets more bitches than anyone in the mcu fr  

1,477 notes - Posted July 13, 2022

#3

I want mary and stede to be friends so bad. I want stede to stop by for tea wearing a fake nose and beard a la jim whenever they’re docked nearby and him and mary to catch up and gossip about what’s going on with his crew and mary’s widow group and ed and doug. I want mary to hide her giggles behind a tea cup when the dastardly blackbeard comes up in conversation because that’s the man that stede brought over for christmas last year who looked terrified most of the night and then argued with her daughter for a good two hours about snakes. I want stede to raid a ship halfway across the world and find one of mary’s paintings someone had bought and be so proud of what she’s accomplished. I just want them to be besties

1,640 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

#2

I think one of the best things ofmd did was start episode 10 with mary’s pov. It was so important to see how trapped she also was in the marriage and how she was flourishing on her own and that she is truly her own story’s protagonist and if we hadn’t just spent nine episodes following stede we would absolutely be cheering for her to murder her deadbeat husband who had the audacity to abandon her and then try to take it back like it was nothing. She’s such a cool character and I’m so glad she was given the same complexities as stede especially since media is often so quick to vilify female characters in her position and I’m so glad and that we were able to see this glimpse into her mind

9,995 notes - Posted March 30, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Grace’s actress must have such a fun job, she gets to play a completely different character each season

Season 1: robot housewife

Season 2: cool texan scientist lady

Season 3: insane

12,270 notes - Posted June 24, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[shutupanddance]

Hello, could I request a AOSStar Trek with Bones and an injured reader who is terrified of doctors and hospitals?

Thank yooooouuu!!

I love this!! So glad you requested <3 I’m absolutely TERRIFIED of going to the doctor, so I’m more than happy to write this one. Enjoy ;)

Jim Kirk is dragging you into medbay, people are yelling all around you, and you just want to sink into the ground and never be heard from again.

All the bones in your body are aching to get out of here, get away from the needles and gauze and watchful eyes of the nurses and doctors. But you‘re injured, badly, and everything is so overwhelming, and you know you need medical attention.

Jim is gone the second he gets you on a bed, and then you’re left alone.

By the time Leonard McCoy gets to you, he knows something is very wrong. Quietly and carefully, he pulls curtains around your bed, until the medbay noises are muffled and you’re obscured from view.

”You alright?” He asks.

You shake your head no.

Usually, routine check-ups were done in your quarters. Having “Intense Medical-Related Anxiety” on your file along with “frequent panic attacks while under care” had automatically put you under the head doctor’s radar when you joined the Enterprise. He offered to preform basic care in your own space to reduce stress, and it helped immensely. You hadn’t had a panic attack since.

But now, you’re in medbay. And things are beeping and people are yelling, and you have a scratch in your side that’s still bleeding.

”Hey,” Leonard says softly, and you turn to him, desperately trying to focus on his face.

”We’re gonna start this just like we’re in your room. Nothing new, or different, except for the location. It’s still just me and you.”

You nod. You’re grateful for the curtains, which protect you from the chaos outside, and also because you’re embarrassed. You can’t stop your heart from racing.

McCoy sits next to you on the bed.

”Len,” you whisper, ”I don’t like this.”

He reaches out, and squeezes your hand.

”I know, honey.”

He starts at your head. Like always, his fingers brush across your hair, looking for any bumps or blood. This is familiar. He turns your head gently to look in each ear, and each eye. The tricorder beeps in his lap. His hands run from your shoulders down your arms, squeezing gently.

As he squeezes, you realize that your shoulders are extremely tense. Your whole body, really. You do your best to relax and relieve the tension.

”That’s it,” Leonard mutters, his eyes now inspecting your wound. You hadn’t even noticed when he gave it a shot of numbing. “Just like every other checkup,” he reminds you. It’s not, really, but thinking of it that way helps. You breath deep.

The anxious feeling is still there, and you feel it in the pit of your stomach, but the butterflies and tension are gone. You’re breathing normal. And as you relax, you start to make sense of your surroundings, seeing the bed and the curtains and the doctor as if for the first time.

He looks up. You smile.

”Hi.”

He smiles, too.

”Hi back.”

By this time, you’re all patched up. He pats your bandages gently.

”You ready to go?”

You hesitate, feeling weak from staving off that panic attack.

”Why don’t you rest for a bit,” he suggests, and you nod.

With another pat to your wound, he stands up. Before he leaves, though, he plants a soft kiss on the crown of your head.

”M’ proud of you,” that familiar husky voice whispers.

And really, you’re proud of yourself, too.

”Thanks, Len.”

You don’t know what you’d do without him.

[pigeonwithapen]

Tell me everything about the 2nd grade ofmd au PLEASE!!!!!!!!!

ABSOLUTELY thank you for asking! (I'm summoning @laszlosharmonica on this lol)

So this au takes place in the early 2000s, circa somewhere between 2003-2007, in an elementary school somewhere around Greenville, NC. Stede Bonnet is the newest addition to Sra. Jimenez's 2nd-grade class and has convinced most of his classmates to play pirates with him at recess. The events of the au take place with the kids' games overlapping, including a pre-existing game of pirates led by Ed, Mary and her friends playing house, and Jackie's assorted shops and restaurants.

we're still working on organizing the logistics of it all but I've put some fun facts under the cut!

Ed and Izzy are best friends, but Izzy gets extremely jealous when Ed and Stede get close.

Izzy also has asthma and once refused to listen to the gym teacher telling him he can't run the mile with the other kids and ran so fast he threw up.

Jim's nana is their teacher, but the rest of the class doesn't realize this until about halfway through the year though.

Jim, Oluwande, and Jackie's parents are friends and they spend time with each other outside of school.

Ed, Izzy, Ivan, and Fang all live in the same apartment complex and often stay with each other after school if their parents are out.

Because their apartment complex doesn't allow pets, Fang can't have a dog but he really wants one. :(

Stede is very particular about his books and he insists on having two copies of all of them, one that he can bring to school and the other to keep at home, and it's very important to him that the adults in his life understand that.

Frenchie is extremely allergic to cats and his mom once tried to deter him away from petting every cat he saw by telling him they're witches and now he's terrified of them.

Lucius is above grade level in reading and writing, and the only one in class that knows cursive. He is EXTREMELY proud of this fact. He also keeps his pencil case pristine (or as pristine as a 2nd grader can).

The Swede loses his first tooth in class but doesn't know you can't put them back in and he's extremely distressed.

Jackie's 20 "husbands" are actually her stuffed animal collection. Jim accidentally rips one and they don't speak for at least 2 weeks.

Buttons is one of those kids casting spells with sticks and making leaf potions and always carries around his favorite seagull plushie, Karl.

Evelyn has a spotted tabby cat, but she tells everyone at school that it's a jaguar.

Jackie is keeping the sillybandz economy alive.

Pete and Buttons play Webkinz together but they aren't aware that they're playing together.

Pete is that kid that's always telling wildly exaggerated stories about his weekend.

They take a field trip to an aquarium once and it's as adorable as you'd expect it to be.

[nagdabbit]

MY GIRLFRIEND HAD THINGS ABOUT DYNAMITE TO SAY AGAIN

"theyre really gonna make me watch hager. theyre really gonna do me like this. the opener is hangman's slot, fuck outta here with this."

"undefeated! bruh, this bitch only had three fights, and the last one was a dq cuz he can't keep it above the belt. that ain't something to be proud of, that's literally doing mma wrong."

"this man is a dumb, transphobic cunt." - this one wasn't a joke, it's just true.

"wardlow is just a great big boxer boi, huh."

"this is booooooring, fake mma is boring. regular mma is boring and it's literally one of my hobbies!"

siobhan upon getting even more bored: "i'm gonna make tea in honor of... this. its just honey for wardlow and a whole bottle of vodka to forget." me: "how is that tea?" siobhan: "ill use icecubes shaped like leaves. it still counts."

"i still think i should be allowed to hang with kingston for just like ten minutes. that's all we need to cause significant property damage."

"i need someone to clip darby yeeting himself at someone, but add the song wrecking ball."

"i am still manifesting hook's shoulder-waist ratio. can you imagine? those shoulders and my tits. exquisite."

"who hasn't won a fight with the clever use of zipties?" *darby proceeds to lose* "alright, fine, *I* have won a fight with the clever use of zip ties."

"small arn better wrestle in those goddamn loafers."

"kris is the best friend with custody of their single collective braincell, right? right? you're not agreeing with me. why aren't you agreeing with me?"

"i have no notes, this match was perfect, i would die for all of these himbos and the alien."

"peter avalon should be the leader of the wingmen and the fact that he isnt is a hatecrime against me, personally."

"i just think, personally, this callis character should be murdered. and in case this is ever used as evidence in a court of law, i am making a joke, but also callis isn't real, so." *several seconds of googling later* "oh he IS real. huh."

"wrestling sure is kinky, huh?"

"i just think that hook and his dorito shoulder-waist ratio should wrestle, not small arn."

sitting up straight and yelling, "HEY, SMALL ARN IS VERY GOOD, ACTUALLY? DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS?"

"i take back the joke about about loafers, i like this young old man."

"when does andrade debut, why is he not in a ring wrecking shop right this instant, why am i not watching andrade."

"i do not care for the blondes. they bore me."

apropos of nothing, during a commercial break: "did i ever tell you about that time i snapchat'd running from the cops? like i was recording them while they chased me through a park, right? i dont remember why, i think i was just walking home and walked by a crime but i dont fuck with bacon so i booked it. that's like the same energy of joey janela. joey would snapchat running from the cops."

"they havent booked penelope vs jade cargill because they know i would absolutely cause major flooding in this region and don't want that on their conscience."

"oh, she f l e x i b l e."

"miro is so menacing and terrifying, but he could honestly talk my goddamn pants off."

"if anyone hurts vickie i will lose my goddamn mind. i will riot. i will drive to florida and wreck a bitch."

"santana and ortiz are my favorite tag team, i want it on record. they're good boys, brent."

"shut the fuck up dash." - she couldnt remember which was dax and which was cash

"oh they're still doing just the one women's match a week, huh. i see how it is. does tony just not like women?"

"i looked up smart mark sterling and unfortunately i would die to protect him."

"i want to fight jade. in both the horny and non-horny way."

various names shes called the young bucks because she refuses to remember their name(s): buckaroo bozos, mikey and nike, buck offs, jim and the other one, the fraternal twins, steel panther, matthew 7:21 (and i quote, "it's the only verse i remember that isnt the cold steve one), knob jackson, the fuck outta here, frat boys, alter boys, not this dumbass again, mrs. jackson's greatest shames, discount lucha bros, horse girls

"what the fuck do you mean karl is the older one?!"

"i like kaz. let him do like one murder, he's earned it."

"put penta in a dc movie, you cowards."

"go back to impact, leave my son eddie alone you fucks."

[clownholemcfannywhistle]

CreepyPooPooPeePeePasta AU

My BFF and I often do Creepypasta roleplays, but we make the characters act like they’re on crack and 100% change their personalities for humor purposes.  Here are some of the headcannons we have (and/or may have in the future) in this AU.  This is very cursed; you have been warned.  (Content warning: mentions of urine/feces, really REALLY immature humor, NSFW post)

Jeff the Killer

Panty thief

Screams a lot

Sometimes has farts on people’s faces

Ben Drowned

Barely potty-trained

Sometimes takes laxatives so he can projectile shit into the mailbox

Pisses on Jeff

Screams the most out of everyone, like constant all-caps

Dick the size of a cashew, and that’s being generous

Worships the object of his affection to an unhealthy level

Steals clothing from his crush to make a panties quilt that he can cuddle in

Loves sucking titties

Eyeless Jack

Obviously into vore

Underneath his mask, there is no face--just one giant butthole

His face anus has six tongues and hella taste buds

Laughing Jack

Loves using his nose as his crush’s butt plug

If you steal his candy, he will go ballistic and shank you with his tongue, which can become erect at will

Instead of testicles, he has jawbreakers

Slenderman

Requires poop offerings from all mansion residents to stay sane

He bakes shit cakes with diarrhea icing, but he’s the only one who likes them

Not even Offendy is into that shit

Uses his tentacles to wipe people’s asses

“Mmm, I’ll save this for later~~~”

Must be locked in a cage anytime there’s a normal cake for any occasion, as he WILL try to poo on it

Also loves kittens

Trenderman

Just wants to make and wear clothes in peace

Has no genitals, like a Ken doll

Will absolutely hex anyone who even stretches out his shirt

His glasses help him smell bullshit even though he has no eyes and they’re glasses

Offenderman

Terrified of anyone who will stand up to him

Has no understanding of meme culture and will be very intimidated if anyone references a meme around him

Frequently eats spaghetti

Since he’s pale, spaghetti sauce stains his skin

Splendorman

Very annoying

So annoying, in fact, that he got an anonymous present of a baby elephant to keep him company so he doesn’t annoy everyone

The elephant’s name is Jim, and he sharts so furiously he flies around the room with his “shart rocket”

Ticci Toby

Watches so much hentai

Has anime sex dolls and body pillows

Will hiss at anyone who dares touch his anime paraphernalia

Masky

The definition of duality; both a proud cuckold and a possessive yandere for his crush

Says the worst possible things at the worst possible times

Has an altar dedicated to the object of his affection and masturbates to it daily

Hoodie

Joins dating websites looking for exclusively senior citizens

“Looking for a sexy silver Babushka to pull my pre-pubescent moustache”

Loves getting pegged by old ladies

Bloody Painter

Also a yandere but way less obvious than Masky

Makes sculptures of vulvas with teeth and gets off to those

Draws furry foot porn

[makingsofgreatness]

Hmm do you have any Silver/Sarah headcanons you wanna share? (In the mood for this adorable couple lol!)

I DEFINITELY DO!! Aah thank you for this ask!

-Being a couple, Sarah brought out the soft, gentle side of Silver, while Silver brought out the adventurous, fearless side of Sarah, something she hadn’t experienced in years. Now, everyone views Sarah as a kind, gentle soul who enjoys the simple things in life, but there’s so much more to her. Silver recognized this, but still, he was shocked when Sarah came to him insisting that he teach her how to fight. For a while, Silver firmly told her he wouldn’t, that she didn’t need to learn. In reality, he was just terrified that he would cause serious harm to her. But eventually, he gave in. His lass wanted to learn to protect herself, what was wrong with that? He was so afraid to hurt her during training though, that for a while they really got nothing done. Sarah finally convinced him to go rough on her, which absolutely KILLED him, but Sarah found it very fun. He taught her hand-to-hand combat, how to use a gun, and even sword fighting (he was scared to death using a sword against her). A few times during hand-to-hand training, Silver would catch her off guard and send her to the ground. He felt SO BAD every time and argued that he would never teach her again. He couldn’t bear to hurt her. But Sarah was more resilient than he thought. She pushed back every time, and every time he reluctantly agreed to keep teaching her. Sarah became an excellent fighter, and their relationship became stronger. They ended up falling more in love, of course. Although he wouldn’t admit it and still worried for her, he loved seeing his lass fight. Jim immensely enjoyed watching their training sessions, as it mostly consisted of playful banter. He was also very impressed to watch his mother excel in fighting. He was proud to have parents who were both badass fighters.

-Silver was very happy to be with Sarah and Jim on Montressor, but he still loved the Etherium. To have both, he took up a job delivering cargo. Sarah was very supportive of him, but still missed him greatly. After all, he would be away for weeks on end. They would write to each other all the time, and every time he came back, Silver would have something for Sarah that reminded him of her while he was away. Sometimes it would be a certain coffee, or maybe a necklace. Sometimes it was a dress. Whatever it was, if it caught his eye while they were at a port, he would get it for her. It made her heart melt. All she could do was shower him in hugs and kisses when he got home.

-On a particularly long cargo trip, (a few months) Silver received his usual letters from Sarah. They always made him so excited, but since he was busy, he only had time to read them at night. He could hardly wait. When he tore open a certain letter sitting by the soft glow of a candle one night, something fell out. A tiny little pair of white knit socks were in his hand. Now, Silver definitely isn’t stupid, but for some reason, this baffled him. All Sarah said in her letter regarding these socks was, “I hope you enjoy your gift!” Silver sat for a minute staring at them, trying to think of what they were for, until it hit him. Oh. That - why, that could only mean...his heart raced with excitement (and nerves). Was this really happening? Upon showing them to a fellow crew member, the guy nodded and said yes, that’s what a lot of wives do when they’re expecting. Silver was beside himself with joy. He absolutely could not wait to get home to Sarah. When he made it back, Sarah was waiting for him at the door. He noticed the smallest bump resting under her hands, and he may or may not have cried. Jim, who had known for quite some time now, stood by laughing a bit as Silver engulfed his wife into a hug and buried his face into the crook of her neck. Sarah didn’t mind that his tears slid down her neck and stained the back of her shirt. She was just happy he was here with her. Jim made remarks about how there wasn’t an ounce of roughness left in Silver, Morph flew circles around everyone out of pure excitement, and B.E.N cried like he usually does in situations like this. It was a very happy day in the Benbow inn. Silver was SO proud.

-When Sarah gets sick, Silver and Jim don’t budge an inch when she worries about the work that needs to be done and how she’s perfectly well to be up and going, thank you very much! But ah, she always ends up in bed with soup. Besides being slightly annoyed, she was a very good patient. In fact, a few days off from work were nice. But Silver on the other hand, is a terrible patient. So it was no surprise that when Silver came downstairs with a cough, sore throat, and runny nose, he absolutely REFUSED to go back to bed. Sure, Sarah protested when she was sick, but it was NOTHING like Silver. Sarah and Jim spent 30 minutes arguing with him about how he needed to go back to bed. He was sick! But no, he was more concerned about leaving Sarah and Jim with all the work. (“Silver, you feel like crap and anyways, you could get the customers sick too.” “Do I look like I care?”) As you can see, he’s very grouchy and irrational when he’s sick, but it all boils down to him not wanting to leave his family. Sarah finally gets him upstairs by nearly yelling at him, which surprised both Silver and Jim (Jim could hardly keep his laughter in), but hey, it worked! However, Silver HATED it. He complained, he argued, he insisted he was FINE, dammit! He even tried to sneak down from time to time, not realizing there literally was no way to do that without getting caught. Again, his feverish brain was irrational. Sarah and Jim spent most of the day wrestling him back into bed. When he was upstairs they would laugh about how much of a child he was acting like. It was very funny to see an intimidating man upset about being in bed and eating soup. While it could be annoying, Sarah found it rather adorable. She would often go look at him when he was fast asleep, giggling at his messy hair and face all squished up in his pillow. When he was awake and Sarah wasn’t busy, she would go keep him company. That made him feel better for sure. She even spared a few kisses, not caring if she got sick because of it. Towards the end of the day when Silver was especially tired, he expressed his gratitude to Sarah for taking care of him, as much as he hated it. Sarah would only respond with a laugh and a shake of her head. Oh, she loved him, even on days like this.

I have so many, if you would like to read more please ask!!

[incoherentbabblings]

What are your favourite comics anyway?

Oh! Oh! Oh! Okay. Full disclaimer. We’re going for what comics I re-read over and over again. Are these comics...good? Eh. Are they bad? No, I don’t think so. Some were meh to wow! when first released that time has either been kinder or harsher to, but I don’t think I have a series or a run or a title which is I like which is like... hot guilty garbage. Though, of course, feel free to disagree. There are some authors on here which people will not want to touch with a barge pole, and I totally understand and encourage not touching them if you don’t want to.

Having said that, here are my favourite popcorn comics (largely Titans and Batfam because I am... basic): 

The Flash (2016) issues 39-45 + Annual #1

Having said that, Flash time first. People think Williamson is a real hit or miss writer and I do agree, but I think this whole arc is one big hit. It’s frantic in its energy, I love Gorilla Grodd as a villain, I love the modern Flashfam trying to help, I love how Wally coming in to help totally turns the tide and the mood. I love how everyone looks at Wally like… this guys is powerful, more powerful than any other speedster… but also noting there’s something very fragile about him. I didn’t include Flash War in this because I’m still waiting for the payoff for that angst regarding Wally, but this arc… mwah. Wallace Rudolph West being vindicated as the greatest Flash (whilst allowing Barry to be flawed and to lead his family)? Yes please. Also I love Carmine’s art. I gather it’s hit and miss for some folk but I love the line work. Also Carlos D’Anda’s issue (come baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack draw Dick and Roy again your work has gotten so much cuter this past decade) is a beauty too. Big ol’ eyes.

 (Under the cut ‘cause this is LONG)

Batman Dark Victory

One of two Loeb stories for me. And yeah sure Long Halloween is objectively better but…jelly bean

Also, angry traumatised Dick smacking a dying man with a stick. What a legend.

Gates of Gotham

Cass! Damian! Dick!Bats! Tim! A mystery villain! World building for Gotham! Stuff exploding! Batfam banter! Trevor McCarthy art! This bizarre panel of Jim Gordon holding Tim’s hand like he’s checking the time?

It’s one of the last ‘pure’ Batman stories before the reboot – Bat Inc aside – so it’s how I like to read the Batfam’s relationship by the end of that universe. Everyone’s a lot more content, proud Dad Bruce, happy and settled Dick and Damian, Cassandra returning home, Tim chopping off the emo hair… it’s all good.

Grayson (particularly #5)

I know why people can’t stand it. The circumstances leading up to it are bog awful. Opinions on Tom King’s writing has only grown more spliced with time. The (sex) jokes are too on the nose and hit too close to home for many. The cheesecake art is too stilted for some. But! Issue #5 is my favourite single issue story. Ever. You never have thought boxes in this series, because everyone is lying, but you aren’t told when. You never know how genuine Dick is being at any given moment, until it is just him and the baby. I love how single-minded it allows him to be. I love how he flat out lies and manipulates to protect that little girl, whilst also caring for Helena. About how seriously he takes his job of protecting Bruce and his family (and that’s why he’s even doing the stupid spy thing in the first place). And maaaaybe it’s unrealistic that Dick could outlast Midnighter crossing the desert, but screw it. Bruce can be better than metahumans all the time. Let Dick get an issue to be so to. Saving a little girl who is probably going to grow up to be akin to Superwoman. Just because he’s given himself that responsibility. He’s going to double cross twenty groups at the same time and come out clean as a whistle. And he’ll cross a desert with a newborn to do it.

Light of my fricking life.

Infinite Crisis

I…I like that things go boom. John’s is very good for that. Also, the Nightwing and Batman moments howowheheheheheheeeeeeee. Almost wish Bruce had shot Alexander. I wonder what would have happened?

(Brief side note: Graphic Audio’s adaptation of this is great fun. I dropped a bowl of cereal at the part of Superboy Prime versus the Titans. Cassie’s scream when Pantha’s head got punched off was a bit…intense. The No Man’s Land one is very good too if you have cash to burn - the voice actors are the same in both and Nightwing’s voice actor has this lisp and I don’t know man... I love it. He’s now the voice in my head for Dick).

Titans/JLA and The Titans (1999) issues 1-25

The Titans are now known I think for not being a very proactive hero group. Books struggle with balancing team dynamics versus plot, and this one is no exception. I know people don’t want to touch Devin Grayson’s stuff with a barge pole. My justification for this is flimsy I accept that, however, the JLA/Titans comic was the very first comic I read when I was like six or seven. I was rummaging through my brother’s room as a nosy kid does and this was at the top of his pile. Thank god for the little info boxes as each Titan was captured/referenced. I fell in love with Kory, I fell in love with Dick, I fell in love with Donna (oh Donna…) and then I tumbled down a hole and pretended I hadn’t until about six years ago. So that’s nice. So yes, this one is one hundred percent nostalgia based. 

But honestly, Linkara did a retrospective on this event comic and series years ago, and his reasons for loving it are the same as mine really, so go watch those if you have like five hours to kill. When Devin leaves the comic remains strong for just a moment then... absolutely plummets off a cliff. So I really wouldn’t bother with the second half of the series but hey. You do you.

Teen Titans/Outsiders: The Insiders

More Geoff John’s explosions. My first comic that got bought for me. My brother walked in to the shop and said: “I need a comic for my sister where Starfire gets a good showing” and the men went… ah yes.

Eleven-year old me was like EXPLOSIONSSSSS but also was intrigued by Kory and Dick’s bedtime convos (perhaps…I was a bit under the age bracket for this book - Kory gets a good showing huh?) but uh. Anyway. Also this is when I was thoroughly enamoured with Roy. This crossover is typical Winnick and John’s angsty angst with overly poetic narration and tropey tropes which, combined with what came before and what was to come for the Outsiders, can make both series such a slog to get through, but in isolation, I think it’s a real fun crossover which gave everyone a bit of time to shine and some real fan-ficcy moments (very self-indulgent, and I love that in a comic).

Teen Titans: Year One

I love Amy Wolfram and I love Karl Kerschel. It’s a good intro to those five characters with cute stories. Does exactly what it says on the tin. Batman is demonstrably a major prick in this, even after de-brainwashing, so it’s obviously going with the ‘Dick is only half as functioning as he is thanks to Roy, Wally, Garth and Donna’, which I can get behind 100% depending on what story they are trying to tell, but it’s just… it’s still sad to read. I just think the art is brilliant at giving each of the five very clear characteristics just from their body language, and you know immediately what each character dynamic is like with another.

Batman Hush

The other Loeb story. Again, it has what I like in a Batman story. A mystery, the family, appearances of villains, flashbacks and brooding, fighting, Jim Lee’s Nightwing being hunky… Ahem. It’s a fun read I think. Also, I really like Loeb’s Bruce? I don’t think people talk about it much. But he’s really chatty in his own head. And he’s witty and dry and funny. I like that! Also, Babs is such a backbone of this story. I adore that. She’s treated well here, I think.

Black Mirror

I flipping love this arc. I love it. I love the two contrasting but deeply disturbing in different manner art styles, I love the mystery, I love Babs role in the story, I love Tim’s little appearances and the banter with Dick, I love the weird villains and the terrifying ones, and how you think one is one of the two only to be revealed to be the other or both. I love Dick’s investigation and how he goes about it differently to Bruce. I love Dick’s relationship with Jim, I love the flipping reference to the vultures and owls seemingly following Dick (a whole reboot before Snyder got to tell that story), I love the monologue about how James thinks Dick is weird and weak for his compassion and love, when really that’s his greatest strength, I love Jim wanting so hard to believe James is trying against Babs’s cynicism, but also does try to get an unbiased opinion of someone who is proven good at reading people (Dick) and does what he needs to when his son is actively harming people, I love that ambiguous ending and the questionable science, I even love the Joker’s one (1) scene with Dick. I love this line,

I love Snyder at his best. When he’s good…mwah. Great.

…And yeah. That’s my story.

[kinetic-elaboration]

September 1: 3x06 Spectre of the Gun

Okay so, it might be a little early to declare myself a S3 apologist, since there are still a lot of eps I’ve never seen, but I feel like I’m pretty close..

This ep was so good!! Honestly I think it’s one of my faves. And perfect to usher in Spooky Season.

Honestly, this show really is my happy place. Just all the characters together on the bridge, on some kinda adventure, looking at weird space buoys and investigating stuff.

Again, this buoy looks like a Windows 98 screensaver.

Kirk keeps referring to Spock as “Science Officer.” Is he mad at him? Full of some particularly intense longing that requires him to put extra distance between them?

Excuse me, you address US as aliens? YOU’RE the aliens.

Hmmm, so it seems they’re not friendly.

It’s addressing them in different languages!!! I love it. Love the reminder that Uhura’s first language is not English,also.

“True telepaths are dangerous.” As opposed to fake telepaths like Vulcans lol?

The Melkotians withdrew immediately. They invented space travel, they saw space, and they said “not for us” and they turned around and left. McCoy would like them; they’d have a lot to gripe about together.

The welcome mat is NOT out.

“Unlike Mr. Scott’s transporter, this unit is not functioning.”

It legit looked like Spock put his hand on Kirk’s back there. Like he clearly raises it, but not far enough to be seen above Kirk, so like.. what was the point? Where did it go?

LEE CRONIN--oh no, flashbacks lol.

“We come in peace”--immediately pulls out gun.

I should have watched this when writing my Western fic.

Just bits and pieces of a Western town... and a completely red sky...

The guns are “crude but dangerous.” If only Sulu were here; he’d love this.

An announcement with a specific time and place on it--that’s a very precise detail to just pull from their minds. Must have come from Kirk’s, that nerd. Maybe Spock. But probably Kirk.

“Because my ancestors pioneered the American frontier.” I mean did they really get to the frontier? Or just... the Midwest?

Maybe it’s actually because he’s a cowboy at heart?

Aliens using his own ancestral sins as the pattern for his own death for breaking their law IS a great (possibly partially unintended) idea. Oh also, if they think that Kirk and co. are here to ‘tame’ or colonize them, then the Western setting makes even more sense--you’re no different from your ancestors, you came somewhere new and brought lawlessness and violence and death, but not this time!

Can you believe Kirk knows all of these details about the OK Corral? NERD.

Spock is so proud of himself for knowing the phrase “had it out.” Look, I used slang correctly!

These are some creative aliens.

“We know death is real here.” Or is it? They’re literally telepaths guys.

Hmmm, this building doesn’t need a roof I think. - The aliens probably

Can’t believe Scotty thinks his usual is his actual usual lol. You’re going to drink bourbon and like it!

Kirk and Spock look so good together.

They’re obviously Chekov’s disapproving parents.

“The day is still young, Ensign.” I don’t remember the exact context of this but Spock is SO judgmental.

What is Kirk doing? This guy is a hallucination; he won’t be convinced by touching some cloth. There’s nothing to convince! He’s only a Concept.

“Have you seen clothes like this?” / “Yes.” / “Where?” / “On the Claytons!” Comedy gold.

Kirk really thinks he can charm his way out of anything. Hmmm, maybe if I just talk nicely to the Earps, they won’t kill us.

“In small amounts, it [bourbon] was considered medicinal.” Lol.

Scotty is becoming a bourbon guy!

“Mr. Chekov is inVOLVed” lol. Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

“A lot of people and things have tried to kill me.” No need to brag.

THAT’S how you make a city limits sign. Put a dead animal skull on top. I live quite close to a city limits sign and I think it could use a cow skull.

Western Cossacks!!

Poisonous snakes and cactus plants. That really distills the Aesthetic down to its core.

This is a good Kirk episode. He’s really being a good Captain: coming up with different ideas, being creative, pushing his crew to brainstorm.

Bones and his tranqs again.

Bones meets his old nemesis: Old Timey Medicine.

Why was Doc Holiday just...chilling in his own dentist chair? (My mom suggested: power nap. Let’s go with that. Power nap + ability for optimally dramatic entrance.)

Also I can’t believe McCoy just goes into this guy’s practice and starts helping himself to all the serious drugs.

Chekov definitely isn’t the marrying kind.

RIP Chekov.

Bones does not sound very sympathetic here. Jim, get over it, he just died, whatever.

And then two seconds later he turns around and tells Spock he’s not sad enough! You can’t win.

“We all knew the risk when we joined the service.”

“My feelings are not a subject for discussion.” !!!!!!! This line!!

“You worked closely with him.” Yes! Chekov is his protege!

“Bones, Scotty, stop bullying Spock.” <-- not an actual quote but it might as well be.

If this were AOS, Spock would already be choking Bones out.

Whoops, no one told Chekov he wasn’t supposed to die!

“Let’s organize! Let’s form an anti-Earp union!”

“I can’t kill them!” he says in a mad rage.

I mean, it is important, though. That’s not what he does.

Kirk is /disgusted/ by lawlessness and frontier justice. What a Rebel TM.

I feel like Bones was waiting for the gotcha moment when Spock compliments him. “Saying nice things about me? That’s not how this relationship works!”

“Nothing can go wrong.” / “Up to now, everything has gone wrong.” He has a point.

That pause before Spock admitted it hasn’t been tested lol--they don’t want to admit it.

“[The bourbon’s] for the pain.” / “But this is painless.” / “You should have told me that before.” The unexpected comedy stylings of Scotty and Spock.

It doesn’t work--guess Spock’s got to take back that compliment now.

“Captain, you don’t understand--they’ve been telepaths the whole time which we already knew!”

“We’re not going to move from the spot.” * is immediately in a different spot * Well I mean at least he’s trying. He’s doing his best!

Love the OK Corral sign also. Weirdly creepy. With its accompanying horse.

Spock doesn’t have any hips for the holster to rest on.

“What did Chekov die of?” / “A piece of lead in his body.” That would do it.

If the tranquilizer should have been effective, does that mean Scotty is actually passed out right now?

Honestly, this is all so spooky. TRUE Western Horror Ghost Vibes.

Also very trippy. If you don’t believe it... it’s not real... some kinda weird chicken and the egg argument regarding our belief in the truth of physical laws idk but it sounds good. Spock brings it home.

Even with the wind whipping around him, Kirk is SO in love. His absolutely adoring expression... So soft...

“Very well, Sir, I’ll meld with you again. Not that I particularly want to. It will be a sacrifice. But I’ll manage. Even though you’re such a dynamic individual haha ha I’m fine I’m cool.”

I feel like Scotty is NOT into the mind meld. He looks terrified. Maybe he should have saved the bourbon for this occasion.

I know the mind meld is supposed to be a replacement for on screen hypnotism...but is this not hypnotism? Like even more than past uses? In this case, Spock is leaving them with suggestions that he wants to continue AFTER the meld, as opposed to, like, efficiently sharing information or giving immediate suggestions. And the scenes themselves are very creepy and...hypnotic.

Kirk’s patented move: WHOLE BODY ATTACK.

Well, we wrapped that up right quick.

Did they... never actually leave the bridge? Or even navigate past the buoy? This actually brings up a lot of questions as to when the aliens started the hallucinations, what their bodies looked like to the rest of the crew, and how they woke up--since there’s obviously been a bit of a time skip, as Bones is already examining Chekov.

Lol at Chekov, saved by horniness. “Nothing but the girl was real to him.”

“A vast alliance of fellow creatures who all believe in the same thing...”

Kirk’s vision of the utopian future is so powerful, he’s effectively gotten the welcome mat put back out.

A personal question? Kirk is intrigued.

Ah, but it’s just another excuse for Spock to be a hypocrite--how did humans survive? How did VULCANS survive? And for the show to remind us of its utopian vision of the future... we will move past violence, we will prove ourselves attractive to and worth of new alien friends.

Then McCoy walks out so Kirk and Spock can have their Moment. He undoubtedly knows what’s up.

So this ep was shown one day before the anniversary of the shootout at the OK Corral AND on Halloween week. It is very much a spooky season episode. So surreal and strange. Ghostly.

I know using sets rather than on location shoots, and not even building whole sets, was a budgetary issue but tbqh I think it worked in the ep’s favor. It added to the alien feeling of it and was an accidentally creative way of showing that these images were pulled from Kirk’s mind.

This felt like a very Classic S1-ish ep to me. I think it’s because Kirk was foregrounded as the Captain/hero and we get to see not just his intelligence and creativity and leadership but also his compassion and his moral core. He IS the values of the series, personified, and that was clear here.

But we also got to see lots of him and Spock, casually working as a pair, and the use of the rest of the landing party crew was very deft also. I loved that there was time to mock Chekov’s horniness, to talk about Spock and Chekov’s professional relationship, to joke around with Scotty, to show more of the Spock and Bones dynamic.

Again, great sci fi concept. I think this would have been another possible inspo for my Pirate AU if I’d seen it in time (although I think I picked a good mission-concept ultimately). I’m fascinated by the Melkotians: who are they? What do they really look like? Do they communicate any other way but telepathically? Are they corporeal? What is their planet like? And most importantly, what experience lead them to be so isolationist? They specifically refer to the aliens as “disease” coming into their home. And it’s when Kirk shows himself to be fundamentally nonviolent even in the face of his own death, they let the Enterprise through.

Basically, I always enjoy hints of alien societies that bring up more questions for me than answers. I love speculating about it.

The next two eps I’ve seen and remember well and I know they’re classics. I’m really looking forward to them!

[thegreenfairy13]

A Gotham Ghost Story - Part 5

When Oswald shoots Jim on the pier, his ghost is doomed to haunt the mobster. You can read the full story here. 

Thank you @mexican-texican for the beta! <3</p>

What follows feels like an onslaught. Jim is left with no choice but to follow the woman down gloomy corridors as he’s being pulled around corners and up the stairs. He wonders if death will always remain like this, being reduced to a sentient being that only observes but is unable to act.

A door behind him slams shut and the blonde hurls around to lock it. Finally, the cop can take a better look at her and gasps. He knows her, recognizes without a single doubt on his mind Gertrud Kapelput’s face however it can’t be . It’s a cop’s curse, being unable to forget a face, and even if he only ever saw her once he’s still absolutely certain.

But when looking closer, he notes how it can’t be, mustn’t be. The fragile woman might resemble Gertrud, they share the same nose, cheekbones, lips…but it can’t be. This woman is in her twenties, at most, and most notably, she’s got a ferocity and purposefulness to her that Oswald’s mother always lacked.

This young lady might be terrified but she’s not helpless. Jim observes her shoving a couple of dresses and some personal belongings into a bag before turning towards the window, for sure assessing the height and her chances should she be forced to leave the house by jumping through it.

They both freeze at the sound of steps coming down the hallway and before Jim can react, the woman does. “Hold the door!” she shrieks, looking directly at the Commissioner. When he doesn’t budge she repeats her request, more commanding this time.

Unable to process what’s happening, Jim does what he does best: saving someone. Turning, he drops his entire weight against the door. Closing his eyes, all he focuses on is the task at hand. James Gordon is still a cop and this woman is an innocent citizen demanding help. All he has to do is keep this door closed - at all costs. He sinks into the wood, feels each and every little atom, breathes the scents of wax, wood, and metal, imagines the lock fusing with the frame, imagines this single door holding up entire armies because if he doesn’t, whoever makes it through will kill her. He knows that with the same certainty he knows he’s dead, and he knows he won’t allow for it to happen.

The woman glances at him from the other side of the room, smiling gratefully. Jim smirks back at her and it suddenly hits him. She’s resilient, she’d make it without him too, but he buys her the time she needs. Another item follows the ones already in the bag and for a reason unknown, it makes him incredibly happy she’s able to gather everything she requires.

“I’m ready,” she states, already opening the window, preparing herself for the jump from the first floor. Holding out her hand, she invites Jim to follow her. Dazed, he takes it and for the second time today, he actually feels anything . He senses her warmth, picks up on her scent, which is also vaguely familiar, and vows to protect her.

“We’ll land softly,” she orders and Jim nods.

“You can see me,” he states, slightly awed and noting how his state of mind resembles being drunk. Not that he minds - it’s wonderful, as if someone had taken his brain and wrapped it up in clouds.

“Of course I can see you, silly,” she responds. “I conjured you,” the woman declares matter of factly. “I prayed for a guardian to watch over me and my child, I made the sacrifice - what good would it be if you’d appear and I couldn’t see you?” She shrugs as she tries ushering Jim toward the window.

Someone’s banging against the door already. However, Jim is certain they have all the time they need. Not a single second extra, but not one less, even. It’s a funny thing of her to say that though, that she made a sacrifice when he’s the one who died, he muses.

Jim already wants to contradict her when remembering he still has to get his facts straight first. “You’re Gertrud, indeed,” he asserts, waiting for her to confirm.

“Who else would I be?” she laughs a little bit, probably wondering what type of third-class guardian her magic procured. Given the circumstances, Jim accepts the concept of conjurings with shocking ease. Compared to dying, it’s not that outlandish though.

The lawman wants to laugh out loud. When truly taking in her physique, Jim wonders how he possibly could have missed her circumstances in the first place. Gertrud is delicate, way too thin for it to be healthy, therefore the slight swell of her belly should have caught his attention earlier.

“You’re pregnant,” he points out, feeling a bit foolish for stating the obvious the second time in a row.

Instinctively, she covers her belly with her free hand. “You’re here to protect him first,” Gertrud orders. “My safety is secondary. We made the deal, demon!”

“Demon?” Jim chuckles bemused and Gertrud’s face falls.

“You’re not…?”

“A demon?” the dead man finishes. “Hardly. I have no idea what I am. I only know I died and it was because of the baby you’re carrying.”

The women’s eyes open almost comically as she backs away from Jim in sudden horror. She grabs her bag, makes for the window once more, however backs down in sudden desperation.

“But you helped me,” she cries out, frantically looking for another way out. Feeling guilty, Jim raises his hands placatingly.  

The door behind Jim rattles again, louder this time, and the cop feels a sudden wave of urgency, as if he was forced to carry on, else he might give away his chances.

“I’m a cop, I help people,” he says matter of factly, opting for a soothing tone.

“You’re a liar, demon!” she accuses instead, eyes rolling wildly from here to there and suddenly, it hits him. Jim didn’t recognize her right away but now, as she’s pacing the room hysterically, running her hands through the strands of her hair, he perceives the madness.

In later years, her mental decline will be clear for everyone to see, but today the illness is nothing but a small seed. One day, she’ll seek salvation in the illusions her mind will gracefully procure for her and the thought alone saddens the cop. How must it have been, being raised by a mother gradually unable to differ fiction from reality? Is it the reason Oswald never told her about his true profession? It must have been easier, leaving her to her delusions and letting her see whatever she chose to.

Stomping her feet, she focuses all her rage towards the cop. “I’ll raise a good boy!” she declares with conviction. “I’ll have a beautiful baby boy, and he will be happy, he’ll be honest, he’ll be generous, and he’ll know nothing but love. I swore,” she almost screams and Jim shakes his head.

There’s something about Gertrud that makes arguing quite difficult, impossible even. “I said your baby is the cause for my death,” Jim sighs wearily. “I never said he’s responsible for it.” That’s not entirely true, but it’s a lie Jim can live with. Everything considered, dealing with men like Oswald on a daily basis is like playing Russian Roulette; he had it coming, especially after meddling with his freedom the way he did. Heck, he got ten good years, even.

Jim wishes he could close his eyes for a second, escape this new reality for a second. The only grace he’s being given is the ability to stare at a stain on the wall. He wills himself to focus.

“So it was an accident?” the future kingpin’s mother inquires curiously. “And even after your death, you’re here to help?”

“One could put it that way,” Jim admits drily.

The door rattles for the third time, a warning for the both of them to hurry up as a vivid image flashes before the cop’s inner eye: he observes himself stepping away, sees a lock breaking and wood splintering, he sees an outraged man storming inside, Gertrud screaming. Jim sees blood and he feels nauseous. He never could, could he?

Taking a deep breath, he imagines Gertrud’s lifeless body, a baby never born. It feels wrong and terrible, this death.

‘I will faithfully serve and protect anyone in need of a helping hand. I will never kill unless there is no other option to fulfill my vow.’ Jim silently recites the oath he took when joining the force, pushing away an image of his daughter running joyfully towards him. All of this is just a test, Jim tells himself. None of this is real and the past can’t be changed, he remembers his physics-teacher from fifth grade saying so.

Face lighting up, Gertrud claps her hands. “He’ll be exceptional, won’t he?” she muses. “What a man he’ll grow up to be, how much he’ll be loved when his friends even seek to protect him after their death?”

“You are friends, aren’t you?” she urges after a moment, giving him the same treatment he received the first time Barbara introduced him to her parents. It’s a look of pure scrutiny as she carefully sizes him up, for sure wondering if he’s good enough for her precious Oswald.

“We’re friends,” Jim rushes to clarify, fully aware he’s finally saying the words her son longed to hear for years.

Gertrud opens her mouth, indecisive. Jim isn’t sure why he’s secretly proud of the fact that she seems to be slightly disappointed in the statement before her demeanor changes again. It’s slightly endearing how much she and her son have in common.

Narrowing her eyes suspiciously, she assesses the dead man once more. “You said you’re a cop,” Gertrud recalls. “If you are indeed a cop, why would you , the corrupt scum of Gotham, be friends with my baby boy?”

Rolling his eyes, Jim prepares for his well-studied not-all-cops speech, the very same he bestows upon hesitant witnesses.

“I’d teach my child better than to hang out with cops and robbers,” Gertrud declares furiously and honestly, Jim can’t blame her, yet he’s got a trick up his sleeve that works even better than any type of persuasion.

“All honest cops have either quit or died,” he snaps back. “As we both can see, I’m the latter,” he adds drily.

Despite herself, Gertrud chuckles. “Can’t argue with that, darling,” he declares warmly.

“We should leave now,” Jim reminds her when he feels something pressing against his back. There’s no urgency though. He feels it again, this floating, unearthly sensation of being a mere pawn in a greater game, unable to act but to follow the path of destiny.

“Do you think you can help me?” he wonders out loud when taking Gertrud’s hand, leaping out of the window together with her.

He hears the wind rustling through the trees the very second she shouts her answer. They land on the grass, both chuckling in delight when she brushes off the leaves from her dress while Jim is still completely unaffected.

“Who was that lunatic anyway,” Jim wants to know, already running into the woods with her, admiring the long strands of hair dancing through the air. She looks so alive , like that, not even knowing how close indeed she’d been to death. If just one tiny thing had turned out differently, if she had tripped, if she had been silent instead of loud, if the door had not been made from oak, if…

Life always beats death, Jim decides. There’s no hidden romanticism in a life cut short, in a heart stopped from beating. Gertrud is gorgeous, and full of hope and love for her son’s future. He couldn’t take that from her even if there might have been a chance it would have stopped his own suffering.

Laughing in sheer relief, Gertrud runs through the trees, the bag flapping over her shoulder. “Who should it have been,” she grins. “My baby boy’s grandfather, of course.”

Even Jim has to giggle. For Gotham’s standards, that sounds like such a mundane family-drama.

“I need your help, though,” he shouts in lieu of an answer. “I need to be alive again,” he adds and Gertrud stops.

The good mood from mere moments ago is lost instantly and Jim swears he can almost feel the temperature dropping himself when his stomach falls.

“Oh, my poor baby,” Gertrud says, cupping his face lightly between her hands. “My poor, poor baby,” she repeats sadly. “The dead can’t return to life. Not like that. Either, they are gone, or they need to fulfill their purpose.” Jim hopes it’s only a trick of the light she suddenly sounds crazed.

After pondering for a moment, her face suddenly lights up. “But I can do one thing for you,” she proposes excitedly. “I told you I’d make sure my son stays away from cops. I’ll teach him not to befriend one, maybe…”

The gunshot echoes through the woods, cutting her line of thought short. That has been the last warning and Jim can practically feel the time running out as his mind is getting dragged through space and time, hurled mercilessly through the void back to where he started.

The feeling is similar to a cramp, only worse, and a hundred times more painful. Here goes his only chance for help, Jim thinks, as Gertrud leaves him behind, taking his ability to communicate with another living being with her. He screams after her, begs her to call him back, to help him however possible.

Turning, she reaches for him, tries grabbing his hand again yet they both already know she can’t follow. “I promise,” she shouts after him and Jim wants to weep.

[beyond-the-yellowbrickroad]

Movies Watched in 2019 - Filmes assistidos em 2019 (part two / segunda parte)

111. About a Boy (2002) Directed by Chris Weitz, Paul Weitz

I liked it a lot! The Kid is amazing and just imagine my face when I found out he was Nicholas Hoult…

112. Hotel Mumbai (2018) Directed by Anthony Maras

It’s a very heavy movie to watch, even more because is based in a real life history… the amazing cast helps to make it even more realistic.

113. Toy Story 4 (2019) Directed by Josh Cooley

I’m angry and very disappointed. It may sound childish of me because “people change” and “leave our lives” but was that really necessary? I think NOT!

114. Widows (2018) Directed by Steve McQueen

I didn’t like it that much but it was probably my fault… I was expecting something more like Ocean’s 8, but it’s completely different from that. Anyway, the cast is great.

115. Final Destination (2000) Directed by James Wong

116. The Final Destination (2009) Directed by David R. Ellis

117. Final Destination 5 (2011) Directed by Steven Quale

So I re-watched all of the “Final Destination” Series at once, and I had the most fun!

I had already seen de second and the third one when I was little (I was about 6 or 7, grown ups were crazy in the early 2000′s) but I had never seen the others and, for my surprise, I loved almost all of them! (I really don’t like the fourth one and I rather pretend it doesn’t exist)

The second one is still my favorite, but the others are as crazy and fun! I LOVED IT!

AND THE ENDING OF THE FIFTH MOVIE, OMG, I WAS NOT READY!!!

118. Liar Liar (1997) Directed by Tom Shadyac

Jim Carrey making funny faces for no reason for 86 minutes straight

119. John Wick (2014) Directed by Chad Stahelski

120. John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017) Directed by Chad Stahelski

121. John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum (2019) Directed by Chad Stahelski

So I also watched all the “John Wick” movies all at once and all I can say is: it’s really great to see treined assassings kill people to revenge their dogs and to see Keanu Reeves being amazing, sexy AND kicking other people’s asses.

122. The Perfection (2018) Directed by Richard Shepard

I saw this weeks ago and I still am absolutely shocked with everything that happened in this movie

123. Us (2019) Directed by Jordan Peele

Literally, a masterpiece of horror and comedy. The cast it’s incredible!

124. The Lion King (2019) Directed by Jon Favreau

Nice, but… it’s the same as the original, but more… dull. Impossible not to have fun though, because it’s the same movie as the original.

125. Long Shot (2019) Directed by Jonathan Levine

Now I really want to go to a club with Charlize!!

126. The Angel (2018) ‘El Ángel’ Directed by Luis Ortega

Beautiful photography, and the cast is really great! The music is also incredible.

127. Hello, My Name Is Doris (2015) Directed by Michael Showalter

It’s a nice reminder that everyone has it’s own time for doing things… sometimes you star things eary and sometimes, other things happen in life before others, and that OK! I loved it!

128. The Lake House (2006) Directed by Alejandro Agresti

It’s romantic, well done and super interesting! Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock looked so good together! I really loved this sci-fi love story.

129. Pride & Prejudice (2005) Directed by Joe Wright

Honestly, everything is absolutely pefect in this movie… like when Mr. Darcy always look’s like he’s about to throw up everytime Lizzie is around, how Mr. Bingley is an absolutely sunshine, how Jane it’s his perfect match, how Lizzie is perfecly sassy and smart… I, obviously, and I can not stress this enough: THE HAND FLEX!!! (and when Mr. Darcy cofesses his eternal love to Lizzie in the rain and them they fight and them they almost kiss… AMAZING CINEMA!)

I loved the movie and I can’t wait to finally find time to read the book too…

130. Creep (2014) Directed by Patrick Brice

131.  Creep 2 (2017) Directed by Patrick Brice

Both weird movies, but the first one is more amazing because you spend more than a half of it not knowing what it’s happening.

132. Vox Lux (2018) Directed by Brady Corbet

Natalie Portman is amazing and this movie is also weird.

133. Austenland (2013) Directed by Jerusha Hess

A thriling saga to my Pride and Prejudice / Jane Austen obcession…

So, the fake Mr. Darcy (Mr. Noble) looks like young Tom Hiddleston so now I have a huge crush on him.

Also, I think it’s a very fun movie and I had a good time.  

134. Good Sam (2019) Directed by Kate Miles Melville

Fun, I guess… honestly, the romance was unecessary.

135. Almost Famous (2000) Directed by Cameron Crowe

The bus scene when they all are down and then suddenly starts singing to “Tiny Dancer”… The most beautiful thing I saw in my life.

136. The Losers (2010) Directed by Sylvain White

It’s a very fun movie!

But I have an observation: It just don’t sound truthful that people would make fun of a hot, nerdy, super uncle, not being that good with girls Chris Evans… really, he is absolutely hot and cute in this movie, it just not make sense!

137. Sing (2016) Directed by Garth Jennings

I watched this because of Taron Egerton singing “I’m Still Standing”, but I loved it for so much more!!!

138. Candy Jar (2018) Directed by Ben Shelton

Fun for spending the time.

139. The Red Sea Diving Resort (2019) Directed by Gideon Raff

Nice movie and great cast!

(also, I know thi isn’t the point but Chris Evans is beautiful in this movie to)

140. The Jane Austen Book Club (2007) Directed by Robin Swicord

I loved this so much, but I also feel kind of sad because I don’t have friends to make a Jane Austen book club with me and also I will never get married with nerdy and cute Hugh Dancy.

141. The Hustle (2019) Directed by Chris Addison

Anne Hathaway and Rebel Wilson deserved better!

142. The Sun Is Also a Star (2019) Directed by Ry Russo-Young

I don’t want to be mean but, this was horrible!

143. Descendants 3 (2019) Directed by Kenny Ortega

This movie was already going to be very emotional because is the last one of the trilogy, but the recent evens with the super talented actor Cameron Boyce, it was twice as emotional... I cryed a lot.

Also, the movie is increadible in every way: the songs, the dancing, the characters, the cast... I loved it!

144. Brightburn (2019) Directed by David Yarovesky

Well, that was a disaster...

145. Parasite (2019) ‘기생충’ Directed by Bong Joon Ho

Okay, so this movie... there’s so much to talk about this movie...but I don’t want to spoil it... BUT,  everything is absolutely PERFECT! OMG! I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH!

146. Otherhood (2019) Directed by Cindy Chupack

Great cast, fun to watch!

147. The Craft (1996) Directed by Andrew Fleming

ICONIC!

148. Wild Child (2008) Directed by Nick Moore

EMMA ROBERTS: I’m sorry for every time that I sayd that you were not a great actress. You are, and this movie is a masterpiece.

149. Mandy (2018) Directed by Panos Cosmatos

That was a crazy ride and I LOVED IT! Nick Cage it’s amazing in this and I really love this scrypt.

150. Falling Inn Love (2019) Directed by Roger Kumble

This couple is so beautiful and I really wish they could date me as well.

151. Did You Hear About the Morgans? (2009) Directed by Marc Lawrence

I did not like the movie that much but the cast is nice, so is not that bad to wach.

152. Bacurau (2019) Directed by Juliano Dornelles, Kleber Mendonça Filho

This was, honestly, the best thing I saw the entire year. It made so happy and proud of my own culture, and was so increadible to watch, with a great cast and characters that are truly amazing... and as if all of this wasn’t enough, the movie (as a coincidence) talks direcly with Brazil’s currently politic scene. 

When the movie was over, I felt like crying of happines... I so proud o f brazilian cinema and how it gets better and bigger each year!!  

PURE PERFECTION. 

153. Between Two Ferns: The Movie (2019) Directed by Scott Aukerman

There was scenes that I really found funny and there were times that I was just confused... but I liked it.

154. Last Holiday (2006) Directed by Wayne Wang

QUEEN LATIFAH I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, PLEASE BE MY FRIEND!!

Honestly, this movie is everything a romcom should be... PERFECT! 

155. The Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018) Directed by Lasse Hallström, Joe Johnston

I’m absolutely angry with the fact that Keira Knightley and Matthew Macfadyen in the same movie and they even looked at each other! CRAZY THING RIGHT?

156. Rumor Has It… (2005) Directed by Rob Reiner

Just imagine a world were Jenifer Aniston and Mark Ruffalo are a couple... 

The movie was SO WEIRD!!! (but good) 

157. It Chapter Two (2019) Directed by Andy Muschietti

The first one still is my favorite, BUT this is so great... I’m not even going to begin to write about the cast, ‘cause everyone knows it’s absolutely PERFECT, but really, BILL HADER GUYS! JUST, AMAZING.

Anyway, I did not got even a little scared, but who cares, it’s a great movie.

Also, the scene were Bill Skarsgård  show up without the Pennywise makeup... his acting was SO GREAT!

 158. Midsommar (2019) Directed by Ari Aster

Today I saw someone describe this movie as “a bunch of white people killing other people and dancing in circles” and honestly, this is the perfect description for this.

159. Homecoming: A Film by Beyoncé (2019) Directed by Beyoncé Knowles

i CAN’T BEGIN TO DESCRIBE THE FEELINGS I FELT SEEING THIS! This woman is beautiful, super talented and a genius! 

YOU JUST MIGHT BE A BEYONCÉ IN THE MAKING!! 

160. Frozen (2010) Directed by Adam Green

HORRIBLE! OH MY GOD! I FELT SO BAD WATCHING THIS, IT WAS TERRIFYING! OMG!

161. Hush (2016) Directed by Mike Flanagan

I NEVER FELT SO UNCONFORTABLE IN MY LIFE! Truly a good idea for a scary movie and a very well executed one to! Loved it!

162. El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie (2019) Directed by Vince Gilligan

The perfect ending for one of the best suporting characters on a TV Series.

163. Little Monsters (2019) Directed by Abe Forsythe

Lupita Nyong'o deserves way more recognition from the Movies Industry because she is so great and even with a fucking OSCAR on her shelf, she barely has any leading characters on her career and is SO UNFAIR!

This movies is funny, scary, the cast is great and there’s Shake it Off by Taylor Swift was sang by a bunch of kids and Lupita dressed on a beautiful yellow dress all dirty of zombie blood, sooo... you should go and watch it!

164. The Blair Witch Project (1999) Directed by Daniel Myrick, Eduardo Sánchez

The movie it’s okay until it gets on it’s last 15 to 10 minutes... then so much starts to happen and you just want to stop seeing it, but can’t because you want to know the ending of it, and it’s so scary and crazy... Really I totally get why lots of people are crazy about this one... SO SCARY!

Also, look out for the website they made for the three filmakers that “disapeared” ( AKA were killed by the Blair Witch), it’s so good and there’s a lot of more information that makes the movie even more scary.

165. Yesterday (2019) Directed by Danny Boyle

It could be SO GOOD! But it was SO BAD! Lili was this movie, the guy that played Richie in Skins was in this movie and I still did not like it... The sountrack was made by BEATLES SONGS and I still did not like it... SAD.

166. The Witches (1990) Directed by Nicolas Roeg

NOT A KIDS MOVIE! Really, it’s so scary! OMG!

167. Shaun of the Dead (2004) Directed by Edgar Wright

It’s a very diferent zombie movie, but I really liked it! 

168. Maid in Manhattan (2002) Directed by Wayne Wang

IT WAS JUST LIKE CAMP ROCK!!

Very cheesy, not the best romcom I ever watched, but also not the worse... If you want a good JLopez movie, go see Monster In Law!

169. Monster House (2006) Directed by Gil Kenan

ALSO NOT A KIDS MOVIE! This was actually very little apropriate to kids and so fucking sacry, OMG, how this was made up to be a kids movie? 

170. mother! (2017) Directed by Darren Aronofsky

I will never get over this movie, I feel marked for the rest of my life, thanks very much Aronofsky! (no, really, THANKS!)

171. The Meddler (2015) Directed by Lorene Scafaria

Honestly, the “I was visiting my daughter, she just shot a pilot!” joke was THE BEST THING I EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE! Also, “I have to go home, my hands are loud!”.

172. Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988) Directed by Stephen Chiodo

I don’t even know what to write about this one... It was weird and not scary at all, but was kind of... diffent? I mean, you don’t get literally scared but you feel unconfotable, like, a lot! Go check it out and you will hopefully understand what kind of feeling I’m trying to describe, it’s just... weird.

173. Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark (2019) Directed by André Ovredal

WHAT ON EARTH PEOPLE KEEP MAKING THOSE SUPER SCARY MOVIES ANT SAYING THEY ARE FOR KINDS? This was so scary Jesus, and It was great. But not for kids.

If you read the books I don’t know how you going to feel about it, but in my experience from movie adapttions from books, you probably going to feel like shit. But I did’t read the books and loved it, so, you might to :)

174. Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000) Directed by Joe Berlinger

Not ever close to be as great as the first one, it’s crazier, more things happen and you still feel crazy with the characters, but, it’s not as great. But it would be a great stanalone, if the first one did not existed. 

175. Vacation (2015) Directed by John Francis Daley, Jonathan M. Goldstein

This is a comedic MASTERPIECE and I CAN NOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH! 

I love comedy movies, but I always expect to much of them... but this served me EVERYTHING that a good comedy should have to make me laugh until my breath runs out. LOVED IT!

176. Walk the Line (2005) Directed by James Mangold

Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon are absolutely babes and so increadibly talented! 

The movie is a bit slow (maybe only if you not a particularly big Cash fan), but is great! 

177. Love Happens (2009) Directed by Brandon Camp

Jennifer Aniston is amazing and goergeous as always but I didn’t conect with the characters so... it didn’t work to much for me, but it’s not bad eigther.

178. John Tucker Must Die (2006) Directed by Betty Thomas

Talking about perfect comedies, this is ONE OF THEM! FOR SURE! 

179. You’ve Got Mail (1998) Directed by Nora Ephron

I’ve got three things to say:

One: TOM HANKS

Two: I could never date someone that led me to bankruptcy, I could however punch this person multiple times.

Three: MEG RYAN!!!

180. The Prince & Me (2004) Directed by Martha Coolidge

Okay, so I was not expecting anything big from this movie and I only watched it because of Julia Stiles, BUT OMG I’m so thakfull that I gave it a chance, because it’s an amazingly done cliché and the Prince it’s totally hot!

 181. Dora and the Lost City of Gold (2019) Directed by James Bobin

I WAS SO SURPRISED THAT IT WAS SO GOOD! I really wasn’t expecting that! SO GOOD! 

182. Me Before You (2016) Directed by Thea Sharrock 

méh.

But Emilia, I want to be your best friend!

183. Late Night (2019) Directed by Nisha Ganatra

To Queens that almost coused my death because of how much a I laughed in this... it’s ligh, fun and dramtic and real... AMAZING!

184. Let It Snow (2019) Directed by Luke Snellin 

Kiernan Shipka and  Mitchell Hope singing The Whole of the Moon awakend my bissexuality.

Shameik Moore and Isabela Merced to!

185. When Harry Met Sally… (1989) Directed by Rob Reiner

MEG RYAN!!! 

So... this is the movie that every fanfic is based on? I really loved it!

186. Bringing Down the House (2003) Directed by Adam Shankman

Queen Latifah always brings a smile to my face... she’s perfect!

187. Joker (2019) Directed by Todd Phillips

Huum... Joaquin Phoenix it’s a very great actor, OMG! 

188. Penelope (2006) Directed by Mark Palansky 

It was very hard for me to watch this movie and not get distracted by James MacAvoy’s perfect face and body and not so perfect hair in this one, but does anybody really care? It’s beautiful James McAvoy! 

Also, the movie is so great! I didn’t knew about the plot and I was so surprised! It’s very, very good! 

I love the final scene when Penelope just let’s the children run wild while she swings with her hot boyfriend...

“Take of your mask!” ~proceds to kiss Christina Ricci very dramaticly~

189. Mad Money (2008) Directed by Callie Khouri

Everything about this movie was PERFECT

190. Baywatch (2017) Directed by Seth Gordon

Great opening scene, the rest was kind of a mess.

191. Noelle (2019) Directed by Marc Lawrence

CUTE! CUTE! CUTE! 

But I will complain about the lack of Bill Hader content.

192. Every Day (2018) Directed by Michael Sucsy

Another surprise this year, a very good one! 

It’s cute and dramatic, also, this actress kissed every teeneger and young adult in Hollywood!

193. Over Her Dead Body (2008) Directed by Jeff Lowell

A good and weird movie! Gave a few laughs. 

Paul Rudd is in it, so, totally worth it!

194. The Skeleton Twins (2014) Directed by Craig Johnson

A dramatic, surprising and “few good” comedy! 

I really wish I could hang out on Halloween with Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig...

195. Eat Pray Love (2010) Directed by Ryan Murphy

I didn’t quite understood her journey but I quite liked it. 

Veeeery long movie.

196. Death at a Funeral (2007) Directed by Frank Oz

197. Death at a Funeral (2010) Directed by Neil LaBute

I know I should have loved the original version more but the american version... I don’t know what it is (probably the many actors that I absolutely LOVE), but I coul not stop laughing! 

James Marsden was an absolute STAR! 

198. The Other Woman (2014) Directed by Nick Cassavetes

I wish I could personally thank Cameron Diaz for every great movie I watched because of her.

Thank you, Mrs. Diaz! 

That last scene was peak COMEDY!!!

199. The Back-Up Plan 2010 Directed by Alan Poul

JLo! PERFECT!

Honestly, I was thinking this movie was going to be very problematic, but it wasn’t that much... it was actually pretty cute! The birth scene was sacry and funny at the same time!! 

200. Muriel's Wedding 1994 Directed by P.J. Hogan

Don’t judge me, I didn’t liked it, it fact, It made me feel pretty shitty, so I just wnat to forget that it existis. 

[thequeenofadream]

Dancing in the moonlight (Roger Taylor x Reader)

Summary: you’re an up and coming artist who could need some more coverage so your management decides to pair you in a fake relationship with the one and only Roger Taylor. how will things go when things get not so fake?

Words: 4,025

Notes: swearing, fluff, angst but blink and you’ll miss it.

A/N:  there’s a lot of movie references here most obviously to all the boys i’ve loved before haha anyways at this point everything i touches flops so idk but hey i love you all anyways <333 also i spent like five hours on this wow kill me

🎀 tagging: @obsessedwithrogertaylor @malekdarling @i-padfootblack-things

~~~~~~~~~

Dancing in the moonlight. It sounds like such an aesthetic and romantic venture, but has anyone stopped to think about it? Two people dancing in the dark of night with only a glimmer of light to guide their way. It sounds terrifying. What if you trip? What if you get lost? To most it would sound like a enchanted moment to share with the one you truly love, but to you it sounded like bullshit. Dancing in the moonlight was something to good to be true, especially when you had no choice.

That was all you could think about when your manager had instructed that you get into a PR relationship to promote your next album. You weren't unknown, you had a management team afterall, but you could certainly use more coverage. You weren't one for partying all night so that could explain some things, but you weren't a complete prude. The media, however ran with that. You thought it was stupid and most importantly disingenuous. You didn't want fans who only payed attention to you because of who you were dating. You had strongly protested against it, but your label approved of it and quickly found someone to be your ‘other half’. You were sitting on a sofa in an office waiting for your so called ‘boyfriend’ to arrive reading the morning’s headlines.

ROGER TAYLOR IN KINKY GAMES WITH FLAKE GIRL.

You rolled your eyes. Roger Taylor, drummer of queen, was quite the guy. All you could ever hear of him was his risqué escapades and one night stands. You didn't necessarily hate him with a burning passion, but you were annoyed by him. He didn't seem like the kind of guy you'd become  friends with. His lifestyle didn't really coincide with yours. You were much more reserved and quiet compared to his adventurous personality.

You looked up at the clock and back at your manager sitting in the chair across you. He was 30 minutes late.

“good thing he isn't my real boyfriend.” you scoffed, and rolled your eyes showing your annoyance.

“Cut him some slack, (Y/N). “ Your manager, Hera, spoke, pleadingly. You had become good friends and you trusted her for what was good for you career wise. It was just this one time that you were doubting her choice.

The door flew open and out came a middle aged man first and the blonde drummer you had just seen in the paper. You eyed him up and down and could in fact admit that he did look quite handsome and charming. His blonde hair complimented baby blue eyes, how the beach sand compliments an ocean's waves. His physique wasn't toned, but he wasn't a complete stick figure either.

Roger caught you staring at him and raised an eyebrow.

“I didn't think I would catch the ‘polite and innocent’ (Y/N) staring at me.” He smirked sitting down on the spot next to you on the couch. You rolled your eyes setting the newspaper down on the coffee table.

“I can be the impolite (Y/N), if you'd like.” You retorted crossing your arms. Roger was about to respond when the middle aged man spoke up.

“Okay, please stop bickering. We have some work to do.”

Hera just nodded along and you sighed deeply. It seemed like Roger was clueless to what was happening due to his puzzled expression.

“Okay, Jim what exactly is going on?” He asked giving into the curiosity.

“The folks over at trident think you've been way too risqué lately. They want you to have a PR relationship to cover some of it up.” He said picking up the newspaper you were once reading. He handed it to Roger and pointed to the headline.

He grit his teeth, reading through the article. He didn't understand what was so bad. They were a rock band for fuck’s sake, not a bible choir. Suddenly the gears in his mind l started to click and he put two and two together. He looked at you and then Jim and back to you.

“I’m gonna be with you?” He gasped, pointing a finger at you accusitoringly. You didn't understand why he was overreacting so much. I mean you didn't like it either, but you didn't go and point fingers at anyone.

“Yeah, problem?” You asked, almost too defensively. He sat back and pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly frustrated. The man you now knew as Hera chimed in trying to state the positives of the situation.

“Look, you'll both get to show to the media the other side of yourselves. (Y/N), you can show them that you're not the prude they think you are and Roger, you can show them that you're also a charming young man who doesn't take women for granted.”

“But I don’t-”

“We know Rog, but that's how the public perceives it.” Jim interrupted him with the harsh truth.

Roger let out the deepest sigh you've ever heard and took out a pack of cigarettes.

“I’m going for a smoke.” He exited into the alleyway, lighter and cigarette in hand. Jim sighed and went into the hallway, not knowing how to handle Roger. Hera went after him, trying to bring some comfort.

You just sat there, watching everything unfold. You couldn't really do anything against it so you just watched him storm out, but you could get what he's feeling. You decided to go after him and try to sympathise. You entered the alleyway to see him with a lit cigarette hanging loosely from his lips. His back was leaning against the wall. He immediately sees you and takes a long drag, before huffing out the smoke in his lungs.

“What do you want?” He asked, his eyes full of spite.

“I just wanted to say, I don't want to do this either.” You spoke softly, now wanting him to get any more stressed.

“Of course, you wouldn't.” He mocks you.

“I bet you were the one who suggested this whole thing.” He went on throwing his hands up.

Anger started bubbling up within you, and you had to restrain yourself from slapping some sense into him. To say you suggested this was an absolute insult to you.

“Look Roger.” You paused and smiled sarcastically.

“Do you really think I'd want to be pretending to share intimate moments with someone i barely know? No. I’d much rather spend time to myself, writing music. I find this whole thing dishonest and I don't want to lie my way to the top. I want to do things I’ll be proud of.”

Roger stopped for a moment and looked at you, his blue eyes gleaming into your (E/C) ones.

“I know, I'm sorry.” He dropped his cigarette and squashed it into the floor. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to find the words to say.

“I know it seems like I don't care much, but I want other people to see that I'm an artist as well. I want them to know for my music, not the women I’ve shagged.” He says, finally letting out his emotions.

You were now apathetic to man you swore you couldn't befriend. You saw how the media portrayed him and you were glad you weren't in his position. I mean sure he could pretend to not care and ignore it, but deep down inside, he cared a lot.

“Okay, here me out.”

“Hearing you out.”

You leaned sideways against the wall before continuing. “We both want the same thing, we're both being forced to do this and we both want a change of perspective. Can't we work together? ” You suggested.

“I mean of course, but how?” both your minds tried to figure out how you would handle the situation of being together. An idea popped into your head and you took Roger’s hand and dragged him inside.

“Hey, hey where are we going?” He asked as you brought him back into the office. You let go of his hand and went behind the desk to look for some pen and paper. You laid them both out and the desk as Roger sat down on the other side of the desk.

“We have to set boundaries.” You said taking the paper and writing down a rule. You put it back down and Roger took it reading what you written down.

“No sex?”

“Listen if I’m gonna do it, I wanna do it with someone I really do love.” You said handing him the pen.

“Fair enough.” He said writing down something else on the paper. You peeked over to see what he was writing.

“But we have to at least make the public believe that we're head over heels with each other.”

You saw what he wrote and it said PDA. You cringed at the thought, but he was right. You might as well get over it.

“Fine.”

“Aw, come on. I’m not a bad kisser. In fact maybe you'll find out later.” He winked which sent a shiver down your spine. You tried not to make your blushing evident, but it very much was. Roger like making you flustered, and would plan to do so in this fake relationship.

“Okay, no wait” You stumbled over your words before finally forming a cohesive sentence.

“One more rule, we tell no one. No bandmates, parents, sisters, brother, friends. Got it?” You wrote it down while Roger watched. You signed your name at the bottom the very bottom signifying your agreement. You looked back up and stuck out your hand waiting for him to take it.

“Just one person please.” He begged profusely. You thought about it and figured there was no use arguing with him. You were both agreeing on things and you had take the seize the opportunity.

“Okay, okay.” You said as he took your hand. He took the pen and added ‘except one person’ on the last rule.

“Now sign the paper.”

“Are you serious?”

“Just do it.”

You pestered him and slapped his shoulder playfully. He raised his hands defensively, giving in.  He signed at the bottom and it was done. You stuck the paper in your pocket and this was where your fake relationship started.

It was a month into your ‘infatuation’ with one another and the masses were eating it up. You were both showing your more romantic sides and quickly became quite a power couple. People were quick to forget both of your pasts to focus on the your ever blooming relationship. It was so believable that eventually you both had been invited to parties together.

As you got to closer to him, you saw past the flirtatious jokes and alcohol fuelled activities, and saw the music devoted, passionate drummer. You tried to tell yourself you weren’t falling for him, but it was far too late. On the other hand, he also started to see your less innocent side which was not as innocent as he thought.

“So (Y/N), what’s the most romantic thing Roger has done so far?” Freddie asked smiling at you both from across the dinner table. Roger brought you to dinner with the boys as to introduce you to one another. It was going pretty well and you quite like them. They were fun to be around and they feeling seemed to mutual.

“Hm.. I don’t know Fred.” You thought deeply of an excuse, when you realized it was your time to fluster Roger as he usually does.

“Well, there as this one night where roger came to my flat and woke me up in the middle of the night and surprised me with a box.” You paused looking to see Rog’s reaction was currently nothing. He sat back to see how you would fair.

“The box he had was a decoupage of his face and hearts. I was still hazy so I had not had a clue what was going on, so honestly I thought either I was going mad or Rog was absolutely pissed.” Brian and John had started chuckling whilst Fred listened on intently.

“I opened the box and saw a toy car inside, which Roger proceeded take and told me that i’m in love with my car was about me. I was obviously shocked and still half asleep so I told him to fuck off and went back to sleep.” Everyone at the table, but roger laughed, you included. He just pouted trying to look enraged, but ended up looking like a cute kid who just got embarrassed.

“I knew it couldn’t possibly be about a car.” Brian said in between laughs.

“I mean he locked himself in a cupboard.”

Everyone continued to laugh making jokes based off the encounter whilst Roger just waited for everyone to shut the fuck up. He obviously couldn’t protest, but he was pissed. You started feeling guilty for the partially blind melon and decided to boost his ego the slightest bit. When things started to die down, you spoke up.

“Although I will say, that morning i did show him how to fuck off.”

You winked at Roger and his jaw just fell, leaving his mouth agape. He had never heard you say something with even the slightest hint of suggestiveness. You just giggled at him, seeing how surprised he was by your little comment.

“That sounds about right.” Fred raising his eyebrow.

Later on when everyone had left and you and Roger were the only ones left. He asked you about it.

“So what happened to no sex?”

“I didn’t say we could pretend.” You said sipping more of the champagne you had. Roger just shook his head not knowing how to feel, turned on or turned on. He was starting to wish things weren’t pretend.

You had become quite good friends behind the scenes so acting like a couple was becoming less and less of a drag, but your label would always find some way to exaggerate your relationship by creating elaborate plots that would surely catch the media’s eye.

“You want Rog to fake save me from drowning in the ocean?”

They were trying to make Roger seem like some hero type character and you were some damsel in distress; you both responded in ways that got you in trouble. Bottom line, you saved Roger from fake drowning in the ocean. For a label named after the weapon of the God of sea, they didn’t have much control what happened out on that beach.

This incident however sparked numerous others that the management did NOT like.

What you and Roger did was basically do the opposite of what they’d say. If they had told you to go to a new movie premiere together and start some fight only to end up in some passionate make out session in front everyone, you’d go to either yours or roger’s flat and watch whatever movie was on. It was something you both took deep pleasure in for the purpose of fucking over the management and having a good time.

“This is so much better compared to mingling with whoever the fuck the whole night.” You said throwing a popcorn into your mouth. Roger just laughed at you in amusement. He couldn’t believe how laid back you had become because of him. He was proud in a way.

“True.” He smiled as you rest your head on his shoulder. The movie carries on until quite an emotional scene broke out between the protagonist. In that moment a scary thought entered your mind, unannounced and you didn’t know how to react but to blurt it out.

“So what happens when this is all over?” You asked looking up at him, scared to see what he would say. “Well we’ll still be friends for sure.” He said taking some popcorn from the bowl you held. You looked him eye to trying to set it to a more serious tone.

“I’m serious Roger. Do you promise?” You asked as he looked at you, your eyes filled with dread. He smiled soft, knowing exactly how to put you at ease.

“(Y/N), I could never forget you even if I tried. I don’t think I could even go a minute without thinking of you.”

All these little things you did, only hastened your attachment to him. If you could hold onto him for the rest of your life, you would.

You were in love and it was as if a wrecking ball had just wrecked your heart a million times over.

About seven months in, they had called you both in to the very same office this all started. The room was silent and you sense something horrible was about to happen. Unfortunately, you were correct.

“You both have to break up.”

The CEO said firmly as you both sat opposite him. You were going to protest, but the man who was your boss laid out the rules very quickly. He didn’t want to see you together ever again.

You couldn’t even hear what he was saying after he had said you couldn’t see each other anymore. Your vision went blurry and you didn’t know how the both of you were gonna handle this. You wondered what would happen to your friendship. Was your chance at a real relationship crushed for good? You didn’t know and that was what scared you most.

You were miserable. It was as if you and Roger were finally finding your way when stumbled and fell. You were sure you wanted him more, you didn’t have to pretend to love him. You were in love with him, you knew it by heart. You wanted tell the whole world you loved him and you could only wish he would love you in the same way. You could die happily in his arms, but right now you could die period.

The little meeting ended and he left you two in the room to say your goodbyes. The silence was thick just like in the beginning. A billion thoughts were running through your minds so it was understandable. You were about to speak up when Roger beat you to it.

“Well, It was nice knowing you (Y/N), but I guess our time in a fake relationship is up.”

He stood up and left the room, leaving you to it. You would have gone a followed him, but you were too much in the state of shock to do say. You couldn’t believe that he had just done that after everything the both of you had been through. He just threw every memory you shared as if it were nothing. Tears started to streak down your cheeks as you heard the door open. Hera saw you crying your eyes out and immediately deducted what had happened.

“Fell for him?”

“Yeah.”

“I thought you weren’t going to.”

“Me too.”

You had tried to forget him, despite all the polaroids the you had posted around your flat. You didn’t want to take them down just yet, but you couldn’t stand to see his face. He kept you alive, but killed you softly all at the very same time. You would laze around your flat the whole day and spend the night on the sofa the whole night mindlessly watching whatever came on.

You felt as if all the life had just been sucked out of you. You didn’t see any point in living. You were merely an empty vessel among other vessels.

The news about your break up had been a headliner for about 3 days now and you couldn’t care what anyone thought anymore. You threw all newspapers you received in the bin, as soon as you saw your and roger’s name. Fred and John had come over with some chocolates and flowers feeling immense pity. They had even offered to take you out, but you couldn’t not in the state of mind you were in. Brian had also sent over a homemade loaf of bread which was really random but appreciated nonetheless.

You were doing your usual routine one night when a knock came from the door. You grumbled, getting up from your comfy seat. You sauntered towards the door, slowly and groggily as the knocking went on. You opened the door the see the devil himself, Roger.

You were shocked and on impulse, you slapped him hard.

It created a loud sound you were sure the whole complex heard, but you didn’t bother at this moment. He just stood there with his eyes wide open, holding the cheek you had slapped.

“oUch.”

He said rubbed it over again being in unbearable pain. You rolled your eyes not knowing what else he could possibly want. You stepped aside, letting him come inside and glared at him as he came in. “Sit down, I’ll get you an ice pack.” You said walking to kitchen and opening the fridge. Roger sat down on the sofa, the same sofa where you would both hang out with one another, snuggling against the cold.

Meanwhile, Roger was afraid for what was about to happen. He didn’t mean to just leave you hanging, but he didn’t want start a fight and get you into bigger trouble, so he and the rest of the queen just decided to leave the record label. They had all agreed they were shit. He didn’t mean to ignore you in the meantime, but it seems like he has fucked up big time. He got caught up in everything he was doing for you that he forgot you, yourself.

You came back with an ice pack and held it against his cheek, until he did it himself. You finally composed yourself and asked.

“Roger, what the fuck?”

“I deserved the slap, but I can explain further, if you’d let me..” He said raising his hand defensively in case you would strike again. You laid against the sofa armrest and crossed your arms.

“It better be damn good.”

“I didn’t want to get you in trouble so the band and I left the label. I know you said we could only tell one person, but I had to tell them so that they’d understand. I mean we were gonna leave them anyways ” You looked away, your expression softening.

“What I’m trying to say is that when I said our fake relationship was up, I meant it. I want our fake relationship to over.” You looked back at him, and took his cheek in your hand, removing the ice pack and placing your palm against his cheek.

“What do you want then, Rog?” You asked, the icy glaze you once had melted into empathy.

“I want our real relationship to start.”

He closed the gap between the both of you and kissed you like he never had before. You had both kissed many times in the past, but this one felt real, genuine and so much better. It wasn’t a show you had to put up for anyone. It was a moment to be shared by the both of you ONLY. Your lips were soft against his, and he instantly felt the sorrow and pain you had been through the past days, but all that was forgotten when he kissed you so sweetly. You felt like a volcano of flower petals had just erupted and you both were in the midst of it. You both pulled away to breathe for a second.

“I really really love you (Y/N).” He took your hand and intertwined it with his.

“Roger Meddows Taylor, you have no idea.”

So Maybe you were wrong. Maybe dancing in the moonlight was as romantic as it sounded. There were risks and dangers, but they all paid off. You just needed to have trust in one another, that was it. You needed to let fate do its thing and lead you to him as it led him to you. You just needed to trust that everything was going to be alright. You couldn’t trust yourself to fall in love, but now you did.

You were no longer dancing in the moonlight, but you were dancing in the sun and Roger was your sunshine.

~~~~~~~~~

[saccharineomens]

I want to know all the answers from your 100 question meme

Something you find romantic? Answer whichever #'s you feel comfortable answering; I want to know all your inner musings 😝

cat why do you do this to me

i’ll be sticking them below a readmore, then!

1.  Is a kiss considered cheating? Yes! Unless you’ve communicated with your partner that it’s okay.

2. Have you ever faked an orgasm? Nope

3. If you could have one superpower, what would it be? Hmmm this is a really hard decision. I usually say telepathy, but I like shapeshifting, too. I loved the Animorphs books as a kid, even though I didn’t read them all.

4. Do you think you are going to be rich in 7-8-9 years? Monetarily? Nah. But I like to think I’ll still have strong, rich friendships and I think I’ll have enough money to live comfortably alone. 

5.  Tell us some funny drunk story. I just don’t really have one rip. Drunk people are hilarious but normally I’m the DD. I’ve got several pleasant stories, though! There was a time me and my best friend went to a pub and drank cider and played board games and video games until closing time. Afterwards we stopped at an Insomnia cookies, a storm caused the electricity to go out, and we got a half dozen cookies for free. (well, I felt guilty, so I left them a very large tip.)

6.  Why are you no longer together with your ex? I was going through college, it was long distance, and I felt he deserved better. We keep in touch, though.

7.  If you had to choose one way to die, what would it be? Well, painlessly, of old age, in my sleep, of course. But if that’s not an option, out of all the ways of dying, freezing to death seems the most humane. You just get tired, cold, and sleepy, and then you just...don’t wake up.

8.  What are your current goals? Graduate, mostly. Long-term I’d like to live with friends in a big house and my cat, and have enough free time to garden and craft at my leisure, and have the ability to travel wherever I’d like. I’d like to work on a game or movie I’m really passionate about, and I’d love to become a director someday.

9.  Do you like someone? I mean, I like a lot of people, but I assume this means romantically. So, kind of? I find a lot of people attractive and have a ‘if they wanted to date I’d be down’ feeling, but I don’t have serious feelings for anybody specific.

10. Who was the last person to disappoint you? Hmmm I have a terrible memory. Myself, perhaps? I have a really hard time with getting up when my alarms go off. Sleep inertia’s a big problem for me. This has led to me being late to classes and rushing to get ready, which is stressful.

11. Do you like your body? Ehhhh. I guess. It could be improved, like by not having health issues. 

12.  Can you keep a diet? Ha! No.

13. If the whole world listened to you right now, what would you say? I hope you have a wonderful day. The universe doesn’t care about us so be excellent to each other!

14.  Do you work? Constantly, every day. I work to learn new things, accomplish school assignments, make money, feed myself...All my life is is working, right now.

15.  If you could choose only one food to eat to the rest of your life, what would it be? Salad! Because anything can be a salad. Tuna salad, fruit salad, salad with salmon...

16. Would you get a tattoo? Oh, absolutely. The only reason I don’t have any is because of money. I have like five small ideas and one very large one that i’d like across my back. 

17. Something you don’t mind spending all your money on? Food, my family, and my friends.

18. Can you drive? Yes. Do I have a license? No.

19. When was the last time someone told you you were beautiful? Probably sometime in the past month by my mother, but she’s just about the only person who does.

20. What was the last thing you cried for? asdfjal;ksdjfs it was Treasure Planet. Jim and Silver’s relationship is just [clutches chest] so beautiful.

21. Do you keep a journal? Sort of, sporadically. 

22.  Is life fun? Yes!

23.  Is farting in front of people irrelevant? I mean, I prefer you excuse yourself, but more or less yeah.

24.  What’s your dream car? My sib got this really nice Prius used at a good price, and it has a lot of room and it’s a hybrid, so Nice. I don’t tend to pay much attention to cars, as long as they’re comfortable and low-waste.

25. Are grades in school important? I admit that they’re important to me, but that’s something I have to unlearn. My worth isn’t determined by other people.

26. Describe your crush. Ugh. I’m bi, guys. I get crushes on people all the time, every day. Saw this really pretty redhead in the cafeteria over a month ago, and I saw her again yesterday. She’s a couple inches taller than me and has really pretty curly hair, but I didn’t really, like, stare, so I couldn’t describe her face well past ‘cute nose’.

27. What was the last book/movie that really impressed you? Nothing jumps to mind. I guess I’m still falling over myself after seeing Mad Max back in like 2015, that was just the coolest experience ever. I find delight in just about every movie I watch, though. The second Jumanji-sequels movie was just as fun and amazing as the first. Klaus was just incredible in so many ways. 

28.  What was your last lie? I...really just do not remember. Probably telling myself “I’m gonna do my laundry today” a few days ago? Whereas I DID do my laundry today so HA

29. Dumbest lie you ever told? I saved this question for last and it’s late and I honestly can’t remember anything, asdjls sorry. My memory’s awful y’all. 

30. Is crying in front of people embarrassing? Oh absolutely. I mean it wouldn’t be if they weren’t uncomfortable with it, but they always are.

31.  Something you did and you are proud of? I did my laundry today? washed dried folded and everything. I also braved the nighttime neighborhood around my school to solo a Pokemon raid, which was cool. I’m proud of my animation done at the end of the last semester, and of how my teddy bear modelling is doing this week.

32. What’s your favourite cocktail? How am I supposed to choose this? How can you ask me to choose this? I’d have to line them all up and try one by one, honestly, before I could tell you. 

33.  Something you are good at? I’m pretty good at drawing anatomy and expressions, I think. I’m good at baking/cooking, although I lack creativity in the kitchen. I also think I’m a pretty good listener, and a good friend? 

34.  Do you like small kids? Most of the time!

35.  How are you feeling right now? Frankly, a little drained with all these questions, but determined to finish them. I’m a little hungry. I’ve got a lot on my mind, and wish I was doing homework, but I also can’t get myself to do it right now. 

36.  What would you name your daughter/son? Not sure! Every once in a while I’ll be like “ooh, that’d be a great name” and then don’t remember to write it down. Besides, I plan on adopting, and most kiddos already have names.

37.  What do you need to be happy? Money, friends, family, good food, and a place to explore. 

38.  Is there some you want to punch in the face right now? Not particularly. No one other than, well. The rich people I’m pretty sure everyone knows I dislike.

39.  What was the last gift you received? Well, anything my mom cooks for me is a gift, but the last Proper gift was from my friend @ wefflebugs , who got me a blu-ray copy of Into the Spiderverse and some coffee for Christmas  c:

40.  What was the last gift you gave? I gave my sibling @ aconfusedbird a keychain of one of the two Bubble Bobble dragons and kept the other for myself, for their birthday. Handmade from Perler beads. We’d play that game for ages as kids, and we always fought over who’d be the blue one.

41.  What was the last concert you went to? I think it was The Shins? They were so awesome!

42.  Favourite place to shop at? Well, I quite like Target. But I also adore small resale shops. They always have some really awesome things hiding there.

43. Who inspires you? Oogh, a lot of people. Like a million and a half artists I’ve met online, ones I only know their screenname for, inspire me to get better at art. James Baxter and Sergio Pablos inspire me to get better at animation. Wefflebugs’ art always has such lovely colors, which I adore. featherdragon15′s art has gotten a lot better lately, and that inspires me to keep working hard too! Not to mention they’re working for nasa which is rad af, and also inspires me to keep working toward my dreams. My sibling aconfusedbird inspires me a Lot in a lot of personal ways, like to be more kind to myself and to keep moving forward. My mom inspires me to keep gardening. roachpatrol/roach-works inspired me to get into welding, lizardlicks inspired me into wanting chickens and a small homestead. My teachers inspire me to keep working hard in school. 

44. How old were you when you first got drunk? 19, I think? I’ve only gotten properly drunk once. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to eat another boiled peanut, but other than that it wasn’t a problem lol.

45. How old were you when you first got high? I haven’t, actually. I don’t have a reason not to or anything, but it’s just never felt like the right vibe yanno?

46.  How old were you when you first had sex? I guess it really depends on your definition. Personally, I’d say I haven’t yet.

47. When was your first kiss? Well, I played spin the bottle when I was seventeen, which was technically my first kiss, but if that doesn’t count then it was about a week before I turned eighteen, and I kissed the guy who’d become my first boyfriend.

48.  Something you want to do until the end of this year? Play video games....I wish I had infinite time to play video games and watch movies and draw and just...enjoy my time on earth, you know? Without feeling like it had a deadline.

49. Is there something in the past you wish you hadn’t done? I try not to live with regrets. 

(50 is ‘post a selfie’ but im on a computer)

51. Who are you most comfortable around? Either aconfusedbird or featherdragon15, i think. 

52.  Name one thing that terrifies you. asdkfjal;sdf i’ve been listening to too much magnus archives and got recommended to ‘not be too scared of one thing’ if i want to avoid the creatures, so uh. hard to decide. I guess I’m scared of...hm. people who just lack the ability to create bonds with people? people who don’t care about other living things. humans can be fucking terrifying. 

53. What kind of books do you read? Oh, just about anything. Fantasy, realistic fiction, romance, mysteries, thrillers, scifi...all are great. I didn’t used to enjoy nonfiction but it really depends on the nonfiction.

54. What would you tell your 12 year old self? You’re going to have a best friend someday, and it will be everything you wanted. Things with your mother will improve when you’re in your last few years of high school. You’re going to become a great artist.

55.  What is your favourite flower? Not sure! I like many. There was this one flower i found in high school that smelled incredible, but I’ve no idea what it was. I should find it again.

56. Any bad habits you have? ...Well. Not waking up when my alarm goes off is pretty annoying. My procrastination in general’s frustrating. And, well, just between you, me, and the rest of the internet, (tw: self harm) my trichotillomania causes me constant distress and anxiety.

57. What kind of people are you attracted to? People who want to learn new things, are kind and compassionate, respect me, and have a good sense of humor. Someone I can be adventurous with.

58. What was the last thing you cried for? Well, i answered a similar question earlier, so I’ll answer for the second most recent time I cried. I was in Pennsylvania, the day I had to fly home, and when I went to check in for my flight, all the seats were taken, and I needed to pay for an upgrade if I wanted to guarantee a spot on the flight. This wouldn’t be a huge problem, except that for both of my flights to get home, an upgrade cost $70. And seventy dollars was a big chunk out of my budget for, you know, food. So I cried out of stress and frustration with the airport companies for charging me seventy bucks for ten more inches of legroom that I didn’t want nor need.

59. Is there something you don’t eat? Some food that truly disgust you? Not really! In terms of what’s normally accepted as “food” in American society, that is. I don’t care much for worms or insects. Other than that, I’m interested enough to try almost anything once.

60. Are you in love? In love? No. Am I full of love? Yes, for many, many, many things. 

61.  Something you find romantic? Oh man, anything could be romantic if done by someone I care for. I think gentleness is romantic. Quality time is my love language, so if my partner cancelled plans to spend time with me, that’d be romantic. I find romance in trying new things and going to new places.

62. How long was your longest relationship? Four months or so. It’s the only relationship I’ve been in, though, and I hadn’t intended for it to go past summer, so that was longer than I’d even planned on haha.

63, 64. What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex? Opposite sex? Uhhh kind of hard to answer this one. I mean, i hate the culture in which men are raised to be, but I’ve heard that ‘male’ and ‘female’ brains aren’t particularly predisposed to anything in particular? Like, both men and women are capable of emotional intelligence and compassion, it’s just that our culture doesn’t encourage it in men. 

65. What are you saving money for? Food, college. I might treat myself to a school trip to Disney, but I don’t think I have the budget rn. As a student I’m kind of coasting by on the bare minimum rn, I don’t have anything i CAN save up for.

66. How would you describe your bad side? I mostly just avoid you or try to not spend time with you. 

67. Are you actually a good person? Why? I think I am. I care about other people and try to make other people’s lives easier and happier. I try every day to become more sensitive to other perspectives. I do what I can to benefit the earth for those who will come after me.

68. What are you living for? Ooh, deep stuff. I’m living for helping other people. I’m living for my friends and family. 

69 (nice).  Have you ever done anything illegal? Pfft, guys, jaywalking is illegal. So yes. I’ve also drank while underage before. But nothing really big, no.

70.  Do you like your body? Wait a second. This was number 11, too. Well, I guess I’ll change it to What don’t you like about your body? Which is my under-chin. It’s kind of a double chin, kind of not. But while most things I could change about my body, I don’t think I could change that without surgery. And yeah, I’ve thought about it. Not that I have any of the cash for it. I also wish I didn’t have (tw: self-harm) trichotillomania, so I’d have more eyelashes and eyebrows.

71. Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally? I think I probably have, to douchebags. Like “hey, that’s inappropriate”.  

72.  Ever sent nudes? Nope!

73. Have you ever cheated on someone? God, no. Big #1 no no for me.

74. Favourite candy? I RECENTLY DISCOVERED TAKE 5′S AND REESES HAVE COMBINED INTO ONE GLORIOUS CANDY BAR, SO, THAT.

75. Is there a blog you visit every day, or almost every day? Tag it! Agh, okay. @ aconfusedbird, @ busket, @ loreweaver-universe, @ orange-plum. The four blogs I don’t actually follow, but whose blogs I visit every day. It changes around every few years. It used to be a different bunch back when I first got on tumblr. I really have no idea why I haven’t followed them. Habit, I suppose? Also, it still won’t let me tag my sib for some reason. (nvm I removed the tags, i don’t want to bother them)

76. Do you play any computer games? What is your favourite game? lmao uh, that’s kind of an understatement. I can’t list all my favorite games, but I’m very fond of The Last of Us. I have played. So many video games. I’ll chat about them anytime!

77. Favourite TV series? Avatar: The Last Airbender, I think. It’s really hard to top that.

78. Are you religious? Does God exist? Not really religious, no. I do think that there’s probably a god out there that sparked the Big Bang. I don’t really follow the Christian God because despite what every church service said, I never felt like He loved me. Jesus was a super cool guy, though. If there’s a god out there, I think they pretty much keep to themselves. Maybe have some fun watching creation, but don’t really interact with it at all.

79. What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why? asdkfj;as i don’t remember. probably my textbook Directing the Story by Francis Glebas? It was a pretty cool book about moviemaking.

80. What do you think about vegetarianism/veganism? I’ve reblogged a lot on the subject. I respect those who practice it, but it can cause a lot of environmental harm. In theory, it’s not bad! 

81. How long have you been on Tumblr? Like eight years or so? Maybe nine? wild. I visited blogs daily before the number got high enough i was like ‘okay i’ll just make an account’.

82. Do you like Chinese food? Oh, yes!

83-85. McDonalds or Subway?   Vodka or whiskey? Alcohol or drugs? Subway, whiskey and alcohol.

86.  Ever been out of your province/state/country? Yes, yes, and no!

87. Meaning behind your blog name? I’ve had this one for many years now. I really like the word ‘saccharine’ -- inspired by @ saccharinesylph back in the old days -- and i couldn’t just name myself ‘saccharine’, so i needed something else. and I was pretty big into Good Omens at that time, and I was like ‘haha! saccharine, good, omens. saccharine omens!’ Plus, it feels like a very positive and comforting name, and I strive to be a comforting person. 

88. What are you scared of? ok i def answered this moving on

89. Last time you were insulted? uhhhhhhhhh no idea. oh, wait! i know. i was getting graded on my performance at my job late last year and i disagreed with the grade my boss gave me. It was like ‘person shows considerable care of their community and goes above and beyond to educate others’ and i was like ‘oh yeah that’s, like, my whole Thing, my whole Goals and Personality and Ideals’ and then my boss came in and was like ‘2/4′ and i was like ‘wtf??’ Apparently she felt that i just wasn’t really applying that part of myself to my job, and i was like ‘you serious? i’m doing a lot!’ but also she’s my boss.

90. Most traumatic experience? A series of emotionally/mentally abusive things my mom did during my childhood. It’s definitely had the longest lasting effects of any trauma. Permanent anxiety problems, ptsd, my self harm, the whole shebang. Don’t worry, though, like. Things are way better between us, and she’s apologized many times.

91. Perfect date idea? Going on a hike! Maybe walking on a beach. Just spending time together and talking. Eating some delicious food. Spending the entire day with each other, then curling up and cuddling at home and watching a movie. then talking some more. lots of handholding and kisses. im a super hopeless romantic.

92. Favourite app on your phone? the internet, ofc lmao. But other than that I use Animal Crossing Pocket Camp and Pokemon Go an awful lot. 

93. What colour are the walls in your room? At school a boring white, although I’ve taped some art up. At home a really pretty light blue color that I did all myself.

94. Do you watch Youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber? I do! And I like so many channels, honestly. I really like Rachel and Jun, and I really like Pop Culture Detective. I’ve seen a lot of jackscepticeye’s stuff, too. Proko, Vox, and Sinix Design are all good too.

95. Share your favourite quote. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter.” -Dr Seuss

96.  What is the meaning of life? To be happy, enjoy yourself, and love others!

97. Do you like horror movies? Ha ha ha, not really. I liked A Quiet Place though. 

98. Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened? She’s cried sometimes over how she treated us in the past. Sometimes it happens because I talk about how she’s hurt me. She always expresses regret and apologizes again. 

99. Do you feel lucky or special in a way? I feel lucky with how I met my best friend. We’d had band together and kind of both thought each other as a cool person, but we didn’t really hit it off until a couple years later and she saw me drawing Homestuck fanart in Psychology lmao. The rest is history. Love you so much, Haley. I feel lucky my mom realized she was being abusive and stopped, too. Not everyone gets that. 

100. Can you keep a secret? Oh, definitely. But do tell me what needs to be secret, otherwise I won’t know. For example, my sib asked me to keep their gf busy while they bought her a present, so I tried, but then she was like ‘oh, where’s your sibling? we should find them’ i was like ‘oh no, i think they’re just buying something, it’s fine’ but she was stubbornly moving toward the checkout and i was like ‘stop, i think they’re buying something for you’ so i. kinda told a secret? i didn’t tell her what the present was though.

JESUS THAT WAS A LOT OF TYPING, LMAO. IT’S THREE AM. GOODNIGHT

[nicomoviewatchinpsychopath]

Sonic the Hedgehog Movie Review

SONIC THE HEDGEHOG: VIDEO GAME BASED MOVIE IS FORMULAIC BUT OFFERS PLENTY OF FAST-PACED FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY AS WELL AS LONGTIME FANS! 

By Nico Beland

Movie Review: *** out of 4

The world’s fastest hedgehog hits the big screen in Sonic the Hedgehog

PARAMOUNT PICTURES AND SEGA

The blue blur (or Blue Devil as the movie calls him) makes his big screen debut in Sonic the Hedgehog, based on the beloved Sega video game franchise of the same name. Believe it or not out of all the video game franchises, my favorite is and always will be Sonic the Hedgehog and have been a proud supporter of the hedgehog since childhood.             

Granted, it wasn’t until after Sega became a third-party developer for consoles like PlayStation, Xbox, and Nintendo when I became a fan of the blue hedgehog, but ever since I got my hands on the Nintendo GameCube port of Sonic Adventure 2 as a kid, my Sonic fandom was pretty much instant. I’ve played many of the video games both old and new, watched all the cartoons, read the comic books published by Archie Comics at the time, and I owned several action figures, plushies, and other Sonic merchandise throughout my childhood…in fact I still have most of those even to this day.             

I’ve been clamoring for a Sonic the Hedgehog theatrical movie for years despite video game film adaptations usually being critical and/or box-office poison. But given the popularity of Sonic especially during the 90s when he was rivaling Nintendo’s Mario franchise who already had a theatrical film released in 1993, I’d assume one would have been made back then or at the very least in the early-late 2000s when Sonic Adventure DX: Director’s Cut, Sonic Adventure 2 Battle, and Sonic Heroes as well as the hit Saturday morning anime series, Sonic X were released, I was so eager for a Sonic movie that a couple of friends and I got together and made movies of our own when we were kids (They sucked BTW!).             

After years of waiting and Sonic making a few big screen appearances prior in Disney’s Wreck-It Ralph movies and Steven Spielberg’s Ready Player One, the beloved hedgehog finally gets a movie of his own which leads us to today. The film is directed by newcomer Jeff Fowler in his directorial debut, produced by Neal H. Moritz (Fast & Furious franchise, XXX, 21/22 Jump Street), and executive produced by Tim Miller (Deadpool, Terminator: Dark Fate) and is a live-action/animated hybrid (Yep, just like Alvin and the Chipmunks and The Smurfs), which had me very worried when it was announced back in 2014 and was even more worried and disgusted when the first trailer came out last year which had an absolutely atrocious design for Sonic, fortunately they fixed it.

So, how does Sonic’s first movie hold up? Honestly, while I can’t call it the Sonic movie I wanted as a child, I had a fun time with it. It isn’t a perfect representation of its source material and the plot is pretty generic, but the charm of the film’s leads, humor, and subtle references to the games that inspired it are enough for me to overlook that flaw.             

The film follows Sonic (voiced by Ben Schwartz-Parks and Recreation, The Other Guys, The Walk), blue anthropomorphic talking hedgehog from another dimension with extraordinary speed who travels to Earth to escape from those who want to capture him and harness his power. However, when he accidentally causes a power outage while hiding out in the town of Green Hills (Get it?), Sonic is targeted by the government and the tyrannical mad scientist, Dr. Robotnik (Jim Carrey-Ace Ventura 1 and 2, The Mask, The Truman Show) who plots to use Sonic’s power for world domination.             

This forces Sonic to team up with Green Hills sheriff, Tom Wachowski (James Marsden-X-Men franchise, Enchanted, Westworld) who agrees to help Sonic on his adventure to find his missing bag of magical rings that have the power to get him home. Of course, while getting into all sorts of trouble along the way.             The film also stars Tika Sumpter (Ride Along 1 and 2, Get On Up, Southside with You) as Tom’s wife Maddie, Adam Pally (Happy Endings, The Mindy Project, Iron Man 3) as Wade Whipple, and Neal McDonough (Star Trek: First Contact, Band of Brothers, Justified) as Major Bennington.             

Overall, Sonic the Hedgehog probably isn’t the movie longtime fans wanted, but it still manages to be an entertaining and fun adaptation in its own right. It’s easily one of the best films based on a video game alongside Pokémon: Detective Pikachu and The Angry Birds Movie 2 and shows that we’ve come a long way since the dark days of Uwe Boll’s directing career.

As mentioned before, the plot is nothing special and rehashed from other kids’ movies however what sets this apart from things like The Smurfs or Masters of the Universe is that Sonic and Tom do have a strong chemistry together. It’s amusing to see them interact with each other on their road trip, cracking jokes, getting into trouble, and over the course of the film they learn more about one another thus making you care more for them over ANY Smurf or Chipmunk. 

While there are a few jokes that don’t quite stick the landing, the humor for the most part not only made me laugh but there were moments in this movie where I laughed hard. Whether the film was poking fun at the entire Sonicfranchise, a particular running sequence that’s obviously a reference to the Quicksilver scenes from the X-Men movies, or Sonic breaking the fourth wall similar to Deadpool, I was laughing while also admiring how clever some of these jokes are, and let’s not forget Jim Carrey as Dr. Robotnik, but we’ll get to him momentarily.

The redesigned Sonic is a lot better than what we could have gotten, he doesn’t have those ugly small eyes, questionable muscular arms and legs, or the terrifying human teeth anymore. Now, his appearance is more faithful to the source material recreating the hedgehog’s cartoony nature but is different enough to stand out from the rest of the character’s previous designs and be its own unique creation, this is a really good design for Sonic and had the filmmakers went with their original version, this movie would have crashed and burned even harder than Sonic ’06.

Besides Sonic being more appealing to look at now, he’s also just as entertaining to listen to, Ben Schwartz while he’s far from being a replacement for Roger Craig Smith, Ryan Drummond, Jason Griffith, or even Jaleel White, does a solid job providing Sonic’s voice and captures the cocky, arrogant, but good-natured attitude Sonic is known for having. He actually almost sounds like Ryan Drummond’s Sonic voice without sounding like a cheap impersonation.             Moving on to Sonic’s new friend that doesn’t have two tails, James Marsden as Tom, his performance is decent even though he doesn’t quite make as big an impression as Ben Schwartz’ Sonic and especially Jim Carrey’s Dr. Robotnik. With that said, he gets some funny lines once in a while and as mentioned before has good chemistry with Sonic, so yeah, believe it or not James Marsden was partnered up with another CG animated character and this time came out with his dignity unlike his performance in Hop.             

Jim Carrey as Dr. Robotnik owns every scene that he’s in, he’s no Mike Pollock and is a radically different Robotnik than from the games, but Carrey’s energetic and wildly animated personality shines through and gives a million percent whenever the crazy evil genius is on-screen. He’s certainly a lot better than Dennis Hopper as Koopa from the Super Mario Bros. movie.

Hopefully, this movie will be a hit during its theatrical run because I’d love to see a sequel especially if it introduced other Sonic characters like Tails, Knuckles, or even Shadow. Don’t make this like the recent Power Rangers movie, I need my big screen version of those characters!

Whether a fan, newcomer, or just looking for something fun to take the kids to, Sonic the Hedgehog should make everyone happy. It’s not perfect but it has enough action, wit, and charm to make it worth checking out. You’ll be “Up, Over, and Gone” before you know it.

For more movie reviews please visit: https://moviewatchinpsychopath.blogspot.com

[gwenore]

The Trollslayer. Chapter 5.

Chapter 22: The trollhunter comes across the trollslayer. 

Synopsis: Barbara and Jim has cut Strickler out of  their lives after Jim tells his mother the truth about the Trollhunter and what Strickler has done. As trolls start turning up dead, a figure from both Barbara’s and Strickler’s past arrive in Arcadia.

Jim was walking up to his home after having patrolling. He was tired, just wanting to get into his bed and pass out completely.

However getting close he saw a very tall man climbing out of the window of his house! Jim instantly felt his heart skip a beat.

His mom! Had this man hurt his mom?!

Not thinking he ran over with his sword drawn, the changeling sword strapped to his side, having not wanted to leave his side.

“What are you doing here?!” he shouted towards him. The tall man stopped before letting out a chuckle, looking down at the small armored trollhunter.

“The trollhunter!” he exclaimed. “Man… you are tiny! I mean you are nothing more than a runt! Look… I would almost feel bad crushing you. Just give me my sword back.”

He held out his arm.

Jim had luckily enough wits to not reveal that this was his house. There was also something… familiar about this man.

“WHY WERE YOU BREAKING INTO THAT HOUSE? And your sword? YOU ARE THE TROLLSLAYER!” Jim exclaimed.

The big man seemed proud.

“The one and only,” the man boasted with a grin.

“You did not answer my question! What did you do in that house?!” Jim hated how filled with fear his voice was.

“Not that it is any of your business, trollhunter runt, I was doing a favor… for a friend. Now… give me my sword, or… well… I will have to take it from you. I can tell you that the first is a lot less painful,” the man’s eyes glowed from the hood.

“Never!” Jim growled back, his own eyes glowing from the helmet as he felt a rage he had never felt before, his heart beating quicker.

“Alright… you will not be the first trollhunter I have killed,” the man started to turn away, Jim raising his sword, but before he could the man’s leg shot out connecting with Jim’s chin. Everything went black as his head jerked back and he felt the ground seemingly vanish from under him.

The only thing which brought him sort of back to reality was when his back painfully connected to one of the boulders in his back yard.

His head was swimming, feeling like he was about to throw up and his vision was blurring. He saw the man… changeling… walk closer with a grin on his face as he bent over to pick up the changeling blade, tapping it at the bottom of Jim’s helmet.

“Letting your guard down? That is the last mistake you will ever make,” Jim heard him chuckle as he dangled his blade right over his neck.

“JIM!”

Jim recognized his mom’s voice. He wanted to warn her, to tell her to get away from this dangerous changeling.

However he blacked away.

“Your lucky day. See you around trollhunter,” he then turned his back and ran.

Seconds later Jim felt his mother kneel next to him, cradling his head.

“What happened to you?” she asked, removing the helmet, finding that he had changed to his changeling form. However… though woozy, his skull could take far greater hits in this form. Jim then pushed her away, throwing up. Barbara was patting his back.

“We should get you inside,” she helped him up. “You will feel better soon.”

Leading her son inside, she felt her heart clench in anger that someone would do this to her son.

Sitting him on the couch, she went to hand him something to drink. Sitting next to him, she looked at him. Letting him drink she waited a bit as she fidgeted her hands.

“Who did this?!” she could not keep it in any more.

“A changeling… a very big changeling…” he muttered, his armor dissipated as his head was starting to clear.

Barbara swallowed.

“Do you know who he was…?” she stroked over his hair and horns gently.

“I… I don’t, but he was… familiar… somehow. I may have seen him before… somewhere,” he muttered, rubbing his head. His eyes then widened as he looked at his hand.

“I changed!” he then exclaimed.

“Well… looks like you have a thicker skull like this. You are fine,” Barbara tried to assure her son gently.

“I haven’t changed without Strickler here to get me back to human form! I still do not know how to do it!” he stood up, feeling a bit faint, so he had to sit himself down again, his mom steadying him.

“Hey, you will get it,” she whispered softly. “And… don’t you know any other changeling that can… help?”

Jim was quick to shake his head. Sure… Not!Enrique was hanging around in Trollmarket, but he did not have a human form anymore… also letting the little asshole know that he was a half changeling. No fucking way.

And Nomura… no. Just no.

Trusting any changeling with the information that the human trollhunter had changeling blood… that was not something he could do.

“Well… you will have to stay home from school tomorrow, best you get to bed… you need it,” she kissed his forehead gently.

“Thank you mom,” he whispered softly, standing up and walked towards the stair case, leaving his mother staring worriedly after him.

In his room he collapsed on the bed, face down.

He had lost the changeling blade… he had been careless and almost gotten killed.

He would have to find him… find the Trollslayer… and make certain that he would never hurt someone again.

  Strickler woke up as James sat down right next to him. Rubbing his face he yawned. It was now five in the morning. Groaning he rubbed his face as he sat himself up.

“… so… where did you go…?” he yawned.

“Just to fix a couple of things. Ran across the trollhunter, got my blade back, but that was a while ago,” James held up his blade with a proud look on his face.

Strickler felt the chill of absolute dread go down his back.

“Did you… kill him?” for all the things James was… Trollslayer was a name he had well earned.

“No… I was about too, but Barbara came out and I was almost caught, so…” James shrugged.

“Oh thank the heavens!” Strickler exclaimed.

“What do you care about the trollhunter? I mean, he is an utter little runt! Looked like a kid!” James was utterly confused.

“He is a kid, what more… it is YOUR KID!” Strickler grabbed the bigger changeling by his shirt, ready to strangle the life out of him.

“Wait… what?”

“Jim is the trollhunter!” Strickler growled.

“Jim is the…” James froze when he finally realized what Strickler was saying, his eyes widening.

“I kicked the crap out of my kid!”

Strickler sighed, letting go as James sat there absolutely shocked running his hand through his hair.

“Barbara is going to KILL me if she finds out!”

“The list why Barbara would want to kill you is a mile long at this point and you deserve every bit of it,” Strickler stood up to make himself some coffee.

As he stood there he furrowed his brows, finally able to think as the panic was settling down. As the coffee was boiling he wandered back out, James still coming to grips with the fact that he had almost killed his own son.

“Why WERE you at the Lake residence?” he then asked. James looked up at him.

“Hm?”

“Why WERE you at Barbara’s?”

A grin then came upon the bigger changelings lips.

“Oh, I took care of everything. Do not worry.”

Never before had Strickler heard such dreadful and terrifying words.

“What did you do?”

“You are going to love it.”

“WHAT. DID. YOU. DO?!”