#ji smut

[chiscaralight]

men and a darling they can’t get their hands off of! just imagine, it doesn’t matter the time of day, the place, or the situation, he has to be touching you! it starts out cute, his hands residing on your hips as you walk or shamelessly slipping into your back pocket as you stroll along a busy street.

it then graduates to firmly gripping the plush of your thighs in public, maybe even sliding a hand a little too high up your skirt at a friendly gathering. it’s not his fault, he just thinks he’ll die if his hands aren’t on you at all times!

and when he has you laid up in his bed, lips hot on yours as he fucks you oh-so-hard, those damn hands still rubbing you up and down everywhere; at your most sensitive spots. he’s tugging at your nipples, nudging at your clit, sinking his teeth into the skin of your shoulders, and dragging his nimble fingers along your sides before holding you tight, pushing you into the plush mattress as he pounds your brains out. you can barely think! his cock is rendering your brain almost completely useless and his touch is dizzying, messing up what’s left in that dumb little head of yours.

it doesn’t help he knows how every inch of your sweet little body, so even if you cum so hard, he knows just where to prod and poke at you that has your slick mixing with his release as it oozes out of you. you can say anything you want about how he touches you, you’ll never be able to fully deny how good he can do it! hm, maybe he should make you orgasm just from his touch. he knows that you will anyway.

GENSHIN IMPACT: TARTAGLIA, scaramouche, DILUC, kaeya, wriothesley, shikanoin heizou

HONKAI: STAR RAIL: jiaoqiu, aventurine, DR RATIO, jing yuan, CAELUS, gallagher, sampo

JUJUTSU KAISEN: GOJO, geto, sukuna, toji

+ your favs!

[yeonmuse]

BABYDOLL 𐦍༘⋆

PAIRING: Jock Juyeon + Nerd Changmin & Boyfriend Sunwoo x Cheerleader Reader

WORD COUNT | 4.1k

GENRE Smut

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DONT INTERACT ‼️, strong laungage, threesome, oral sex, penetration, exhibitionism, sunwoo gets possessive, jealous sunwoo, mature language, this is Literally Porn With Plot, Jock!juyeon, boyfriend!sunwoo, nerd!changmin, exhibitionism, voyeurism, vaginal fingering, male masturbation, unprotected sex, a good amount of praise, degradation , angry Juyeon, dom!sunwoo, pet name babydoll is used. Sex in the school library.

SUMMARY Sunwoo doesn’t like the way Juyeon flirts with you and he knows you well enough to see the way you look at Changmin when you two are alone. He think it’s about time he made it clear just who you belong to. Perhaps it’s about time the two of you made your relationship public.

MORE, I’ve been thinking about this trio a lot lately ever since more babydoll edits started showing up on my fyp again so, here we go.

You and Sunwoo both shared a mutual agreement that your relationship was to stay secretive. After all it all started with a drunken makeout session at one of Kevin and Jacobs wild parties. The only problem was when Sunwoo agreed to keep things a secret he didn’t think it meant watching other guys carelessly flirt with you as if you didn’t already have a boyfriend. Obviously he knew what he had been getting himself into with making you his girlfriend, you were one of the most sought out girls on the cheer team, pretty, top of your class and you were nice to everyone, sometimes a little too nice. Usually Sunwoo would be able to compose himself really well, but the events of today would be all he needs to finally snap.

Not only was it spirit week but it just so happened to fall on the week of homecoming. Knowing you were part of the court it already frustrated Sunwoo to know that you would have to walk in with one of those idiots from the team on your arm, but Lee Juyeon asking you to Homecoming in front of the entire school was not something he thought he would be crossing off his list. Juyeon was someone that already annoyed him when it came to you. His endless flirting, his touchy nature or even all those times hearing Juyeon call you ‘babydoll’ all pissed him off. And right now all he could do was stand there and watch, his tongue poking at the inside of his mouth at how pissed off it had made him. Watching your face as Juyeon approached you with a handful of sunflowers and a sign reading “will you be my sunshine” he could tell that you were a little nervous. The only thing he wasn’t sure of is if the nerves had been from having been put on the spot in front of an entire crowd, or maybe it was the fact that his eyes had been burning holes into both you and Juyeons head.

“I- I’m sorry Juyeon, but I can’t” Sunwoo couldn’t help but walk off with a proud grin on his face once the crowd dispersed. Part of Sunwoo did feel guilty because he had known how excited you were for homecoming, but it wasn’t like the two of you would be showing up together. It had made him feel so guilty that he decided to shoot you a text to meet with him at your usual spot in the school's old computer room.

“Sunwoo?’’ His gaze was torn away from his phone as you entered the room.

“Hello babydoll” as he greeted her the slight annoyance in his voice was evident.

“Sunny please don’t start I didn’t know that he would do that, and you clearly saw me tell him no.’’

“What would you have said if I wasn’t there?’’

“What?”

“You heard me sweetheart what would you have told him if I wasn’t standing there watching the whole thing?’’

“Sun you’re acting ridiculous, why are you asking me that?’’

“Why are you not answering.’’ he was getting slightly annoyed at your ignorance towards the question, part of him felt like if he hadn’t been there you would have said yes. It didn’t go amiss how you would smile and laugh with him whenever he caught the two of you talking at parties or at the games.

“I would have told him no.’’ There was a sudden silence between the two for a moment before you decided to speak again

“I have to go, I promised Mr. Song that I would tutor one of his students.’’ A frustrated sigh spilled from his lips as he watched you leave. He wanted to follow you and apologize for even questioning your loyalty to him, but he knew that if he went after you now he would only make things worse in his current state of mind. So he sat in silence for a while, five short minutes turned into ten long minutes until he realized how ridiculous he had been acting. With a sigh he pulls himself up from the desk and makes his way down the hall, already having a decent idea of where you might have been, after all you always studied in the same place, the school library. As he grew closer he could hear the sound of your laughter the closer he got to the door. That didn’t sound like just studying to him, as he peeked over the doorframe and gazed in he couldn’t help but feel annoyed all over again.

The way your head rested on your palm as you looked at no one other than Ji Changmin. You sat there laughing and smiling as he sat there all pouty.

“You’re cute but being cute won’t make me go any easier on you Changmin.’’ You laugh at Changmin's sulking, seemingly completely unaware that your boyfriend stood right outside the door looking in. Meanwhile a blush formed on Chngmins face from you having called him cute.

“I know you can do better than what you’re showing me Minni. This isn’t the first time i’ve tutored you, you’re pretty smart and i’m sure you know that so I refuse to go easy on you.’’ As you spoke to him your hand rested on Changmin's arm.

To any outsider looking in it would seem like you had just been being sweet and playful, but Sunwoo was well aware of your mannerisms and tone by now. You weren’t simply doing or saying any of those things just to be nice. He was fed up, and now he was feeling like it was about time he put you and everyone else in their place. Turning away from the library entrance he then turned to the direction of the school gym, the place he was more than sure he could find Lee Juyeon. Everyone knew that Juyeon would stay after school to practice, after all he was one of those members on the football team that strived for perfection. When Sunwoo first called out the others name Juyeon was shocked to say the least, of course he was well aware of who Sunwoo was, but the two were entirely different he didn’t think he’d ever find Sunwoo looking for him of all people.

“Yn asked me to pass on a message, she’s waiting for you in the library, something about wanting to apologize or something.’’ Sunwoo tried his best to seem disinterested in the situation, just enough for Juyeons ears to perk up at the sound of your name. Sunwoo simply watched in slight annoyance as Juyeon walked off the field and disappeared back into the school building. He eventually made his way moments later, slowly but surely making his way back to the library where he had watched Juyeon enter just moments before.

“Babydoll!’’ Sunwoo watched as your gaze then shifted from Changmin to Juyeon who was now leaned over the table, his gaze having fallen on Ji Changmin who was sat a little two close to you for Juyeons liking.

“Juyeon what are you doing here?’’

“I told him you were looking for him, sweetheart.’’ Sunwoo finally steps into the library's entrance, taking a step in and he closes and locks the door behind himself.

“Sunwoo?’’

At this point both Changmin and Juyeon had been staring back and forth between the both of you in confusion.

“I think you should apologize to Juyeon for turning him down in front of all of those people princess.” Sunwoo noticed the way your body tensed upon being called that, he was more than sure you were well aware of his annoyance by now. After all he only ever called you such a thing when the two of you were alone and he was planning on being buried deep inside of you. The look on your face was one of both annoyance and panic.

“Um I think i’ll just go maybe we can finish another time.’’ Changmin was ready to take his leave, standing up in his chair, Sunwoos' gaze immediately shot to him making him freeze up on the spot.

“Oh no no not too fast ‘minni’ this won’t take too long.’’ upon hearing your nickname for Changmin you had used only moments ago, it began to set in that Sunwoo had been watching you.

“Okay what the fuck is going on.’’ Juyeon finally snaps, his eyes blazing as he realized he had been set up by Sunwoo.

“Sun.’’

“Quiet babydoll I want you to behave for our two guest. Go ahead and make Changmin a little more comfortable.’’

“Sun..’’

“What is it? What’s the matter babydoll you find him cute don’t you?’’ your eyes said it all, the fact that you had been looking everywhere but into sunwoos eyes said it all.

“Be a good girl and make him feel good while me and Juyeon watch.’’

“Wha-what?’’ Changmin's face had gone bright red, but Sunwoo chose to ignore him.

“Go ahead babydoll.’’

Sunwoo watched as you shyly looked over at Changmin who was obviously nervous.

“Okay what the hell is going on?’’ Juyeon was pissed, pissed at the fact that Sunwoo seemed to have some type of hold on you, even more pissed that he had been tricked into coming here just for this.

“I’m giving you what you want, you think she’s pretty right? Both you and Ji changmin have a crush on My Girlfriend, how cute right Babydoll?’’

“Sun did you really have to bring them into this.’’

“You think you’re allowed to play sweet and innocent with me Princess? I know you and your body well enough to know that you like it when Juyeon here flirts with you, i also know you well enough to know that you’d fuck him or Ji Changmin here without a second thought. Go ahead and take off your clothes for them babydoll..show them how pretty you look.’’ The way you shifted in your seat told him everything that he needed to know, you were getting turned on by this. Him calling you out in front of the two of them.

“Take them off babydoll or i’ll have one of them do it for you.’’ The room fell silent and both Juyeon and Changmin's eyes seemed to be glued onto you as you slowly obeyed Sunwoos' given order. Changmin didn’t think that his face could get any redder until he watched you strip from your white button up and black skirt.

“Good girl.’’ sunwoo takes a seat on the opposite side of the table and spreads his legs, a move you knew all too well. That smirk on his face and the pride in the way he sat was an obvious indication that he was enjoying this. He had you exactly where he wanted.

“Come here sweetheart, I want you to be good for our two guests. As you take a seat on his lap his arms slip around your waist from behind, Sunwoos cold fingers brush against your bare skin as he presses you against his clothed body against yours.

“You’ll be good for them right?” His fingers squeeze your hips in a manner that forces you to stay pressed against him. You gave him a nod which made him give a swift slap across your thigh earning a soft whine.

“Use your words babydoll.”

“I’ll be good sun.”

“That’s my girl, I want you to look at them while I play with you like the pretty little doll you are.” The entire time neither Changmin nor Juyeon said a word. Truth be told neither of them knew what was happening, but the moment their eyes took in your semi naked frame and sat in Sunwoos lap it was hard to look away.

His gaze burned with pride at the fact that he had you right where he wanted and neither Juyeon nor Changmin could do a damn thing unless he allowed it. His fingers immediately met your clit, pushing past your folds and slipping them right inside you with ease.

“I want you to make sure our guests feel included, look them in the eyes and tell them who you want.” His thumb pressed against your clit as he started slowly, thrusting his fingers deep into you like he has done with you thousands of times.

The side of his lips curled into a smirk as he heard the desperate whine that spilled past your plump lips. The moment you opened your mouth to speak he forces in yet another finger, using the three to stretch you out to his liking.

“I'm sorry, what was that? speak babydoll. ” Meanwhile while you struggled with your words both Juyeon and Changmin seemed to be anxiously anticipating who’s name would spill from your pretty lips.

“Ch- Changmin.” You force yourself to breathe out between ragged breaths, the way Sunwoo continuously abuses your clit without letting up, making you squirm in your seat.

“Tell him where you want him doll.” Without hesitation he slipped in two more fingers, taking the time to stretch your walls and feel you out before he began to thrust them in and out slowly. The way you whine for him to move them faster only causes him to slow them down, he was well aware doing this would only make it harder for you to respond but he didn’t seem to care. His fingers thrust further into your cunt with every loud cry that left your mouth.

“Mm my mouth, sun please.” A chuckle spilled from Sunwoos lips at how desperate you sounded.

“Look at you whining like a desperate little doll for some nerd you’re tutoring to fuck your pretty little mouth when your boyfriends fingers are deep in your pretty little cunt.” His eyes shot to Chagmin whose eyes were glued to his fingers that were buried deep inside of you.

“Well you heard her right? You gonna give her what she wants?”

“Mm S-Sun, what about Juyeon.” Your sudden inclusion of Juyeon made his eyebrow quirk up in pure amusement.

“You want them both sweetheart? You want me to watch while they both have their way with you right doll?” He leaves a loving kiss on your neck before pulling his fingers out of you and patting your thigh.

“sit pretty up on the table for them then and let them know what you want.” Sunwoo sat back in his seat watching as you shyly took a seat up on the table.

“Don’t act all shy now baby you weren't acting shy a couple minutes ago when you were begging me to let them have their way with you.”

“I want Ju to eat me out while I take care of Minni.” He chuckles as you look away from him, a slight blush on your cheeks at having to admit it to him.

“Well then was that so hard princess? Go ahead and help them out then.”

Sunwoo watched as you moved between the two, helping them both get out of their pants while they took off your remaining clothes. Now here you were completely naked and exposed, trapped between two men that were working together to completely destroy you. Juyeons lips wrapped around your sensitive clit while Changmins Cock completely filled your mouth, swallowing up every one of your moans.

You had seemed so shy before but now that they had loosened you up you seemed to take it all so well. It seemed like a dream to you Changmins brown eyes gazing down at you through his glasses as he tugged at your hair and fucked your pretty mouth. All while Juyeon sat behind you forcing you to sit on his face and take the abuse of his tongue. For Changmin seeing you between his legs now is quite a treat, especially the way your tongue swirls around his tip and scoops up his arousal. He couldn’t believe it was real, a girl he had fantasized about multiple times struggling to take the abuse of him down her throat.

“She takes it so well doesnt she? .” Sunwoos' gaze burned into you as he watched the scene before him. You weren’t sure why he was letting this happen but at the time you were too caught up in Juyeon and Changmin to care

Changmin breathlessly mumbles out soft curses when you start to bob your head, brushing fingers through your hair and pulling the strands away from your mouth. you moan at that, squeezing his length and forcing him down your throat. You looked a complete mess, your vision clouded with tears and fucked up mascara while saliva coated your chin and plump lips. One look at you and Changmin groans upon seeing your now ruined makeup all because of the way he was abusing your throat. you’re eagerly motivated now, taking him with more consideration but your mouth’s still as hot as ever. He lets out a small moan, letting you go at your own pace no matter how much he wanted fuck your face. you run a long stripe up the bottom of his length, thumb playing with his tip while his eyes stay fixated on you taking him down your throat so well.

“You're doing so well, babydoll.” Sunwoo chuckles upon seeing the way the tears continuously formed within your eyes.

To Changmin your mouth felt like heaven. Using your hands to pump the areas you’re not able to reach, the way you hollow out your cheeks around him immediately shuts him up. You pull him out of your mouth with a plop, a string of saliva connecting him to your lips as you move in to suck just the tip. Lewd moans spew from your lips upon feeling Juyeons tongue work against your clit. You look down at him which was proven to be a mistake because it immediately made your brain go fuzzy.

Juyeon showed no mercy, not letting up for a second even as your legs trembled, slurping up the juices that drip from your clit loudly. The moment you try to jerk away from him his grip on your thighs tighten and he pushes his tongue further between your folds.

“Don’t move, Babydoll,” He groans wrapping a forearm around your thighs and just eats. He

flicks his tongue over your clit while using his fingers to stretch you out groaning at the way your cunt pulsing and gripping his digits. you’re snapped out of your daze when Changmin forces you to look back at him and shoves his cock back into your throat. Mere seconds later Juyeon gives a few slaps onto your clit as a warning to not take your eyes away from Changmin.

you give him an apologetic look before slurping your saliva off his cock. He hums while you continue the bobbing of your head and the moans that you let out around him send vibrations up his body. Changmin twitches in your mouth and his thigh tenses. All while you could feel something burning within your core begging for your release.

“Better hold it princess, if you cum before Changmin i’ll make sure you can’t do it again when i fuck you.” Sunwoo chimes in from the side making you whine.

Despite hearing that Juyeon wasn’t letting up, licking one last stripe before gathering his saliva into a ball and he spits onto your clit, sight so lewd that if you could see it you'd have cum immediately. he admires how the way it runs down your cunt and mixes with your arousal that he couldn’t help but wish for it to be his cum instead. Your eyes roll back the moment he rubs in his spit, a thumb on your bud while he continues to move his fingers and your thighs are already trembling from how he seems to know all your sweet spots in such a short period of time.

“Yn—” Changmin moans, gets breathy and choked the closer he is to his high, hips bucking up into your mouth. the drool that drips from the corners of your mouth and the sounds of your mouth being so full of his cock sends him into a frenzy.

“Remember we don’t waste babydoll.” At Sunwoos words you whine, the slurping and gawking noises getting faster before you’re taking his cock with a gasp, pumping him while your dilated eyes look up to him and him only. He pulls on your hair before you both cum together, your cum spilling out onto Juyeons lips and face all while Changmin spills all down your throat. An overload hits your tongue and the back of your throat and you nearly spit it back up but force yourself to keep it down.

Unfortunately for you, it was not over, Sunwoo immediately lifted you up from the table, taking you into his lap and spreading your thighs apart.

“Now you’re gonna take care of Juyeon while I show them i’m the only one that can fuck you like the pretty doll you are.” While your lips wrapped around Juyeons Cock Your eyes rolled back immediately as Sunwoo pushed himself inside of you until he fully bottomed out. Your tightness earned a low growl from him as he pushed so deep you could have sworn you felt him hit the top of your stomach. He watched the blissed out look on your face with every little thrust inside you.

“Look at you taking me so well, I bet you loved every bit of Juyeon and Changmin working together to destroy you babydoll.” A chuckle spilled past his lips and he immediately spread your legs wider and pulled your thighs up against your chest. Your moans were evident enough that whatever pain you felt if any had gone away. He waisted no time fucking into you, rough and feverish thrusts from the very beginning. Thrusts that caused your eyes to roll to the back of your head so hard you saw stars.

Your nails dug so deep into his thighs that you nearly drew blood. your moans sent vibrations over Juyeons cock, making him throw his head back and pull at your hair, lines of saliva dripping down your chin as each of your moans were swallowed up by him thrusting into your throat.

“Youre such a pretty little doll baby, look at you being so good for the three of us.” Sunwoo immediately leans down to place kisses on your neck, your nipple between his fingers while his other hand fondles your breasts. The pleasure had been overwhelming your bodies in ways you hadn’t thought to be possible. From the feeling of his fingers against your breasts to every time he thrusted in to you feeling like the more he fucked the deeper into your stomach his cock seemed to push.

“From now on you will make it known that you’re mine. Mine to kiss, to touch to fuck. You’re gonna tell every single guy that approaches you that you belong to someone. understand babydoll?” Your thoughts had been so cloudy that you could barely even make out anything he had been talking to you about.

“Such a pretty little whore gonna cum all over my cock after getting used like a slut other men.” He immediately rested one hand on your waist while resting the other on your stomach and pushing down. He wanted to feel just how far his cock could go inside your little frame. This action was all it took to push you over the edge, the moment he pushed down upon your stomach your legs shook and it was a glorious sight for all of them to see, to see you squirt upon the impact of his hand. As you were finally able to pry your eyes open you felt butterflies in the pit of your stomach. The sight of Changmins hands wrapped around his Cock and sweat dripping down his forehead as he watched both Juyeon and your boyfriend work tinder to ruin you.

Your legs shook violently as Sunwoos thrusts grew in speed and the low growls that spilled from his mouth made it all more easy for you to unravel right then and there, your cum spilling out onto his cock followed by Juyeons release down your throat mere seconds later. Sunwoo wasnt too far behind as the fucked out look on your face and the way you clenched around him was all he needed for him to spill into you, him and Changmin both finishing at the same time.

“You two, from now on stop flirting with my fucking girlfriend.” Slipping his head into the crook of your neck he sucks harshly, leaving evidence that you were now tainted by him, a true indication that you belonged to him and no one else

[daisyvisions]

OctoberFest 2024 🍍🍹

Feeling thirsty? 😉💋 Come get a taste of what’s waiting behind the bar! Phantasize with us as we serve up a variety of drinks inspired by none other than The Boyz. 🥂✨

(SMUT MDNI +18 ONLY) Advisory: drink responsibly—these cocktails will leave you craving more! 😏🍸

🍹Drink 1 (Jacob) - Cosmopolitan with a shot of schnapps

🍹Drink 2 (Juyeon) - Old Fashioned with a hint of absinthe

🍹Drink 3 (Eric) - Martini with a side of whiskey

🍹Drink 4 (Changmin) - Mimosa with a shot of vodka

🍹Drink 5 (Haknyeon) - Mule with a hint of triple sec

🍹Drink 6 (Kevin) - Mojito with a shot of gin

🍹Drink 7 (Younghoon) - Piña Colada with a shot of tequila

🍹Drink 8 (Sunwoo) - Whiskey sour with a side of kahlúa

🍹Drink 9 (Chanhee) - Margarita with a side of white rum

🍹Drink 10 (Hyunjae) - Negroni with a hint of amaretto

🍹Drink 11 (Sangyeon) - Sangria with a side of jägermeister

🍹Drink 12 (for ???) - mystery cocktail

Featuring @momhwa-agenda @midnightfantasiez @snowflakewhispers @daisyvisions as your bartenders for the evening 💖

(also tagging @deoboyznet)

[hcuyk]

OUR INFERNO | CHAPTER ONE

SYNOPSIS ✧ despite being your greatest archnemesis/rival/enemy/frenemy/whateverthefuck he was, hyunjae had always been by your side. that changed when your boyfriend was brought up, creating a newfound rift in your whateverthefuck relationship with hyunjae

PAIRING ✧ rival!hyunjae x fem!reader

GENRE ✧ high school au, enemies to fwb, angst, smut, fluff(?), humor(?) (these mfs bicker a lot), pining

WARNINGS ✧ 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT — cheating, profanity, mentions of physical fight/bruises, underaged drinking, obsessive/possessive hyunjae : NSFW TAGS :  outdoor/semipublic sex, dubcon recording, spit/drool/tears, oral and fingering (fem receiving), penetration, scratching/ripping, humping, minimal praise, degradation, sub!hyunjae for 0.002 seconds, petnames (princess, good girl, babe/baby, slut)

WORD COUNT ✧ 19k

⋮≡ [ OUR INFERNO EXCLUSIVE ] @deoboyznet @flwoie @sanaxo-o — fill out the form or comment/send an ask/dm to be added!

. . . . . . OUR INFERNO M.LIST ✩ next [ TWO ]

⋮≡ [ PERMANENT TAGLIST ] @armysantiny @stealanity @zzoguri @nyujjan @tinisprout @the-kpop-simp @sunwoosberrie @winterchimez — fill out the form or comment/send an ask/dm to be added!

THE BOYZ MASTERLIST | NAVIGATION

AUTHOR'S NOTE : in honor of my three years of officially stanning the boyz on this very day, let's celebrate with my smut debut and writing comeback 😋 enjoy my loves

PART ONE: CHASING THE SPARK (THE FIRE TETRAHEDRON) — fuel, oxygen, and heat | CHAPTER ONE

“Genuine question.”

“Shoot.”

“Who the fuck does Hyunjae actually think he is?”

Unphased by your up-and-coming rage rant, Kevin resumed snacking on the protein bar he had brought with him. He tossed his free arm over the camera equipment and backpacks sitting next to him on the bench, watching you stride back and forth within one of the many hallways in the recreational center. 

“Well, he is your boss.”

“No, he’s the student executive producer,” you corrected, your legs unwavering as you kept a consistent pace to release your frustrations. Kevin shrugged and tossed one leg over the other, staying relaxed despite the hot fumes emanating from your upright and angered figure. You paused momentarily to look him in the eye. 

“Emphasis on the student,” you clarified.

“Emphasis on the executive, Y/N.”

Baffled at how he was defending your greatest archnemesis (well, more like your greatest frenemy), you ignored his rebuttal and started pacing again. Your steps slowed as you envisioned the sensations you experienced just minutes before, back when you, Kevin, and Hyunjae were at the indoor pool to report for your school’s broadcasting channel. Technically, you were the one reporting and filming while Hyunjae was the subject of interest, and Kevin was there for physical support. 

Chills latched onto your skin as you remembered what it felt like to have Hyunjae’s bare torso looming over you, his eyes peering over your shoulder to glance at your footage. While staring at the camera, his gentle, irregular breaths would continuously hit your skin. Water from the pool would trickle down his hair and into your shirt, reaching your backside. When it happened, you could barely comprehend Hyunjae’s ‘advice’ and instead focused on feeling every cold droplet travel through the crevasses created by your spine. You winced at the thought of that happening again, yet somehow you could still hear his irritating voice near your ear, telling you all the reasons why your B-roll of his lap swimming was ‘trash’ and ‘unusable.’

For a moment, you stood there in the hallway frozen, unsure of how to move, before realizing you were just reliving a moment from earlier and that Hyunjae was still in the locker room changing.

“I’m going to make a complaint,” you declared, turning back towards Kevin for his encouragement. Alternatively, you were met with the sight of your best friend completely failing to conceal his judgment and disapproval towards your suggestion.

“Against Hyunjae? You gotta be kidding, right?”

“Yes,” you answered confidently. “Wait, I mean no, I’m not kidding, but yes, against Hyunjae.”

Kevin eyed you skeptically, trying to decipher why you felt threatened enough to report someone like Hyunjae. You may not have spent all your previous years in high school with an affinity for Hyunjae, but it wasn’t like you hated him either—not in the way you truly loathed others. If that were the case, you wouldn’t spend nearly every day with him, bickering until the sun chose to set.

“Sure, maybe my B-roll was trash, I can attest to that, but that does not give his bitchass the right to not only shit on how ‘awful’ I was doing, but also yank the camera out of my hands and delete all the footage I got because they weren’t ‘perfect enough.’ What kind of psycho is that?” You glanced over at Kevin, trying once again to get him to back you up, but the most he gave was a slight nod. Everything you were spurting was half-mindedly being decoded because he had ended up placing more significance on inhaling protein. Regardless, you continued.

“And you would think, hey! As the student executive producer of a high school broadcasting team, he would understand that no! I indeed do not record half-naked people swimming in a pool, whether it be for a career or a hobby. He should also at least have the decency to not swim seven hundred miles per minute while I’m recording. Of course I’m not going to catch up, especially when he barely told me how he wanted things to be recorded? Isn’t he fucking insane for that? Not to mention all the goddamn splashing because of how fucking long his limbs are—”

“You’re explaining this like I didn’t witness the whole exchange,” Kevin grumbled.

“And you would think he knows, right? That Mr. Executive-slash-Captain-of-the-Swim-Team should either be more considerate when, A, he’s kicking water in my direction when he’s swimming or, B, station me away from the edge of the pool? Just a thought, but fuck me, I guess.”

“Well yeah, but the—”

“Also! Not to mention the camera has the fucking ability to zoom in, so why was there even a need for me to stand by the pool anyway?” You scoffed at the absurdity, almost tempted to cackle like a villain because of it. “The least he could do was tell me how to record it or find a way to adjust and compromise without occasionally soaking me with water on purpose, which I know damn well he was—”

“That’s just how-”

“We have a tripod, for god’s sake!” you exclaimed. By now, Kevin had given up on providing you with his input. He opted to rest against the wall, finishing up whatever he had left of the protein bar, and occasionally would roll his eyes.

“But even then, who the fuck wants to see him swim anyway? We’ll probably only need like…what? A minute of the footage for the B-roll? So why the hell is he treating it like it’s about to be nominated by the goddamn Oscars for Best Picture? He just loves to nitpick and control me like a fucking puppet—”

“Keep talking and you’ll potentially strain your throat,” a new voice interrupted.

You jerked around to find Hyunjae, the culprit of your rant, exiting the locker room with a small duffle bag that contained both his swim gear and his school clothes from earlier in the day. His brown hair was only halfway dry, some strands still stuck to his forehead as he approached where you were pacing.

You halted in your path and stared him down. Hyunjae immediately caught onto the mood you were in, and instead of being shocked or hurt, he grinned.

“You.” 

Your attempt at threatening him with one word made Hyunjae laugh.

“Hey, I’m just looking out for you.”

“Oh here we go again,” Kevin mumbled, tossing the wrapper of the protein bar to the side. He pulled out his phone and went on TikTok, deciding it was more worthy of his attention than listening to you two banter—something he had been experiencing for well over five years.

As a mutual friend of yours and Hyunjae’s since middle school, Kevin understood the frenemy dynamic better than either of you. Eventually, over the long years he had known you both, he learned to leave you two be. 

“What about me, though? Are you going to try and tattletale on me?” Hyunjae feigned sympathy as he gave you an exaggerated pout, tilting his head like a puppy’s. “C’mon. I’m just doing my job.”

“Sorry, but I don’t remember ‘being a dick’ being listed under the requirements for your oh-so-important position of power.” You huffed at him and crossed your arms, choosing to face elsewhere as you rooted the soles of your feet to the ground.

Hyunjae furrowed his brows, his eyes never leaving you, as he addressed the third party within the shared space.

“Kevin, was I being a dick, or is Y/N exaggerating?”

Kevin glanced up at his phone and scrunched his nose at Hyunjae in annoyance.

“Don’t even try to bring me into whatever…this mess is.”

“No, tell him,” you demanded, now looking at him. Your glare was enough to burn Kevin into ashes, but it was nothing compared to Hyunjae’s gaze piercing into your back. Knowing that he never looked away made you shiver, hating how fixated he seemed to be—and seemingly without reason too.

“Listen, I wasn’t being a dick. I was treating you the same way I treat everyone else. I’d honestly argue that you’re just narcissistic and think everything is about you when—”

“Oh wow, thank you for admitting that you’re a dick to everyone else!” You tossed your hands up for dramatic appeal as you spun back around to look at him. He scoffed, but his demeanor was quickly shadowed by a smirk that appeared on his lips, testing you with the arch of his brow.

“Oh really? Do you see anyone else complaining?”

“I’m complaining,” Kevin muttered.

“People don’t complain because they’re scared of you, Sherlock,” you retorted. At this point, Hyunjae had already caught onto your bullshit of making evidence up, and it was why this exchange ended up lasting for as long as it did. Nevertheless, his ego continued to build the more you spoke.

“You’re not scared of me?”

And you keep falling for the bait.

“Why should I? You’re nothing.” You approached him and pressed a finger into his chest, taunting him as you stared straight into his eyes.

Suddenly a competition seemed to have materialized because now you both were locking eyes, too stubborn to look away. 

“One day you’ll wake up and realize your position doesn’t mean shit. You take it too seriously and make everyone’s job your job when this should be a learning experience for the rest of us.”

“And who exactly is ‘us,’ babe?”

You narrowed your eyes at him.

“Don’t call me that–”

“And it’s also starting to sound like jealousy to me.” Hyunjae’s eyes finally shifted, but instead of looking away from you like you initially wanted him to, you trailed his line of sight down to your lips. He eyed them shamelessly—technically making you win the unspoken eye contact competition, but at what cost? “I won’t believe you until I receive firm evidence and testimonies from the other students in the club, then maybe I’ll consider your concerns. Deal?”

What you despised most was how well Hyunjae knew and provoked you to get under your skin. He was a raging flame, making your blood boil from both irritation and excitement. You couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was, but after nearly six years of banter with Hyunjae, you knew damn well you enjoyed every second of it. It was like a nonstop competition, and you were always on the edge of winning.

Maybe it was also because you were so used to him constantly being above you. He was the president of the student council, the swim team’s captain, and specifically the one who snatched the executive position away from you in the broadcasting team, yet somehow you were still able to compete at his level of arrogance and egotism. 

Even though you may never be able to top him in the foreseeable future, you at least knew how to match his fury—his fire, with your own.

“You’re pathetic.” You took a few steps back to gain some distance while his eyes flickered back up to yours. He bit his lip playfully, his smile only growing even wider.

“Woah, Y/N. Exposing my degradation kink so soon?”

“I-...you- w-what?!” you sputtered, your jaw falling slack as Kevin’s head snapped up, staring at the two of you in disgust.

“Get a room—!”

“I’m going to make sure you get degraded from your position, you freak!”

“Not exactly how that word works, princess, but I’m glad you’re at least passionate.” His cooing made you want to slap the living shit out of him, your eyes protruding from their sockets are you glared. 

“Are you fucking bricked up or something right now—?”

“Hey guys,” a woman’s voice called out. Your heads turned to look at the end of the hallway, catching one of the recreational center’s workers waving in your general direction. She pressed her lips together and smiled, attempting to be as professional and understanding as possible. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but is it okay if you guys turn it down a notch?”

You and Hyunjae both nodded and whispered apologies, feeling like kids who just got scolded for shoving paintbrushes down the drain. Fortunately, the worker’s smile radiated genuine warmth and consideration, providing you some sort of reassurance that you guys weren’t too much of a disturbance (even though you guys totally were).

“You two are the most childish fuckers I know,” Kevin deadpanned, finally shoving his phone away as he switched between looking at you and the man by your side. His eyebrows bunched up.

“And apparently horny too.”

“I would move across the country if it meant I never had to see him again,” you grumbled, striding back to the pile of equipment to pick up your backpack and the bag with all your reporting necessities (boring script, stationary, and a couple of notebooks shared with all the broadcasting students to collect notes and inspiration in). 

“Hello? I’m still here.”

“Look at that. He already misses me.”

“I’m going to hurl,” Kevin unnecessarily announced, and Hyunjae’s face soured.

“Ew.”

“Exactly. That’s how you two make me feel whenever you guys are together.” Kevin got up on his feet and grabbed the wrapper to shove into one of his pockets (no littering, kids) before outstretching his limbs dramatically. 

“I swear I developed back pain from always listening to you guys bicker.”

“Or, hot take,” Hyunjae interjected, “maybe it’s because you’re always sitting with your back arching forward like it belongs in the Arches National Park–”

“Yeah yeah, shut the fuck up.” Kevin waved him off with his hand and rolled his eyes. “I came here to help carry stuff, not listen to your bullshit.”

He picked up the bag that contained the camera and passed it to Hyunjae. He offered to hold one more thing, but with only his backpack and the tripod left, Kevin didn’t see much need for his friend’s assistance. 

Kevin then faced you, his face stern and rid of emotion.

“You too, Y/N,” he stated seriously. “None of this ‘he said this,’ ‘he said that,’ ‘please fuck me’ bullshit from you either.”

You gaped at him, arms wrapped tightly around the crew’s bag.

“Now why the hell do you think—”

“Zip it.”

Without giving you much of an opportunity to continue, Kevin sped off in front of you, ready to leave the building. You couldn’t even look at Hyunjae as heat rushed to your cheeks, struggling to trail after Kevin’s speedy steps.

Despite carrying heavier items, Hyunjae caught up to you with ease. You wanted nothing more than for Hyunjae’s feet to either slow down or speed up tremendously, but of course he purposely chose to walk by your side, attached to you by the hip.

“He sees it,” Hyunjae sing-songed. “Everyone sees it.”

“Sees what?” you snorted, oblivious to what he was indicating.

“That you want me,” he replied nonchalantly.

The moment you two stepped outside the doors of the center, you stopped to face him, trying to confirm what exactly he was implying.

“You can’t be serious.”

Hyunjae, who also stopped with your steps, shrugged.

“You’re the one in denial.”

Realizing that he was serious, you felt every muscle in your body tense up.

“Hyunjae,” you stated firmly. “I have a boyfriend, remember?”

Instead of receiving something witty from Hyunjae like normal, his relaxed facial features suddenly scrambled into one that expressed remote shock. His lips were slightly parted, eyes searching yours for any hint that indicated you were lying or messing around with him, but you were serious.

The aggressive playfulness from earlier had evaporated faster than boiling water, and you watched as he became stilled. Your heart started pounding, anxiety creeping up within you due to not being able to read Hyunjae like you normally do.

“Since when?” he asked. His voice was quiet, his tone firmer, and by now, Kevin was already by his car, too far from the two of you to understand what was going on. Hell, even you could barely understand what was happening.

“Earth to Hyunjae?” you joked, nervously laughing in an attempt to eliminate the newfound tension looming in the atmosphere. “It’s always been Jiwoong, remember?”

For a moment, Hyunjae could feel his mouth drying up. All his thoughts were held captive in his throat, and his lips remained parted as if they weren’t meant to collide at all. He stared at you like you had just teleported in front of him.

“Y/N,” he stated calmly, “he cheated on you.”

Your initial response was to get defensive, claiming that you already knew that because hell, it was your relationship, but then your brain acknowledged the true elephant in the conversation.

“How-...how the hell do you know about that?”

“I- You know word just-…That doesn’t matter. What matters is why in the world—”

“It was a mistake, okay?”

“A mistake?” As Hyunjae’s brows raised, so did his tone. “You know, people—decent people, don’t make mistakes like that.” 

Seeing how Hyunjae was gritting his teeth, how his eyes were locked on yours, built up a foreign frustration within you. Something about the way Hyunjae was behaving felt like he was trying to control you. 

All the rage from before had now returned, yet this time, there was no more leniency from you—not when Hyunjae was being more condescending than he had ever been.

“You know nothing, Hyunjae, so frankly, I really don’t care about what you think about my relationship with my boy-”

“You’re still with him??”

“Look,” you snapped. “Just because you have the luxury of crushing my hopes and dreams on a daily basis, it does not give you the right to dictate what’s wrong or right about my love life and my decisions. Understood?”

And just like how you always are, Hyunjae refused to shut up.

“How is it dictating when it’s common sense to dump a shitty person?” He dropped the bags onto the ground, and not once did he look away from you. “He’s never treated you well either, and you know that—”

“It’s not your decision to make,” you repeated. You could feel the three key elements of creating a fire stir up within you. You had the fuel, the oxygen, and the heat, and Hyunjae was the chemical chain reaction that would set it off. “How dense can you fucking be to not back down?”

“He cheated on you,” he reasserted, and there was a rage in his eyes that you had never once encountered. “He’s done so many shitty things, and he hasn’t changed–”

“Again, none of your fucking business–”

“And I’m pretty sure I saw—”

“I am not going to repeat myself-”

“Can’t you just listen to what I-”

“Drop it.” You were seconds away from yelling at him, ready to unleash all your anger because never once has someone threatened your love life—Jiwoong, the man you considered your soulmate. Your flame had officially engulfed his, and all Hyunjae could do was stare at you in disbelief and disappointment.

Turning to look away, you gazed up into the sky and scoffed, not understanding why tears had begun to pool up in your eyes. At the end of the day, Hyunjae meant nothing to you—you didn’t even consider him a friend.

After moments of experiencing what it was like to be suffocated by a tension so unbearable, you eventually found a way to ground yourself. 

“I can’t blame him, you know,” you whispered, using the back of your hand to wipe away your tears. “We were angry. He just–...he needed an outlet, and at that time, that outlet happened to not be me, okay?”

Hyunjae stared at you, his mouth desperate to say something, anything, to make you see what he sees—a relationship that isn’t meant to be. That you didn’t deserve to be treated this way. Maybe you were no more than an acquaintance to him, but he knew you have always deserved better. 

“He isn’t someone worth fighting for.”

“And that’s none of your business,” you scowled.

“It isn’t right—”

“Stay in your fucking lane, Jae.”

Hyunjae clamped his mouth shut, and the sight of you completely breaking down tore him apart. Possibly it was all the years you spent together growing up, constantly arguing, yet he knew he was always one to look out for you.

You sucked in a cheek, gnawing at it as your chest urged for you to forgive him, to apologize for lashing out without much notice, but in the end, you prioritized your pride over him.

Not only was Hyunjae’s persistence a stab to your heart, but you suspected that Kevin was the one who told him. By spilling your secrets, it was as if Kevin saw the knife that impaled you and yanked it out of your chest, causing you to bleed to your death.

“I’m done with this conversation,” you muttered, dropping the bag in your arms to the ground by his feet. Your plans had changed to you walking home alone, wanting nothing to do with the other two boys for the next hour or so.

When you turned around to walk away, you knew Hyunjae was going to try and say something. You knew him best whenever he was at his worst, so you spun around to face him for the last time that day to cut him off.

“Never fucking cross that line with me again, got it?”

And with that, you left. 

//

Kevin apologized to you the morning after.

He normally drove you to school, and you debated getting into his car when he showed up. Thankfully you chose to do otherwise because the second you stepped inside, Kevin was apologizing profusely. He talked about how anxious he was all night when Hyunjae told him what happened, and he wouldn’t have known what to do if you didn’t forgive him. Obviously you did, and the rest of the car ride was spent with him explaining his side of the story.

According to Kevin, he only told Hyunjae about how you got cheated on because it seemed like Hyunjae already knew. As Kevin recalled the whole scene, you two assessed the signs, such as how Hyunjae didn’t provide any sort of reaction when Kevin dropped the news. In fact, it had seemed like Hyunjae had brought it up to Kevin instead.

Regardless, it became the last of your worries because all that mattered was that you were back to being on good terms with your best friend.

But avoiding Hyunjae felt like lighting a match in the rain. 

It was your agonizing reality for the next two months, and although you could argue that you had gotten closer to your boyfriend during the supposed ‘Hyunjae Drought,’ you were still plagued with him being everywhere around you.

He was in all your classes, and you never truly processed the extent of how involved Hyunjae had always been throughout high school with you. You weren’t on the swim team, but you were stuck with him during meetings for both the broadcasting team and student council. 

Yet it all felt so different.

Unless he was called on, Hyunjae would talk much less unprovoked and would never look at you during meetings. When he would address the entire team, he would glance at you for a split second before looking elsewhere, no longer watching you like a hawk.

You had also gotten quieter because without Hyunjae to banter with, you recognized that you barely had friends in any of those classes either. 

There was no longer a fight between your flames, and you two kept as much distance as possible. You were thankful that there hadn’t been an instance that interrupted that, such as being forced to record more B-roll with him, and you could only hope that the rest of your senior year would remain the same. 

Then you would never have to see him in college.

Now you were back to being the mediocre student that faded into the background. People knew your name at best, but none have ever tried to become your friend aside from Kevin. No matter how involved you tried to get, the closest you were to anyone was a classmate. 

Hyunjae had always overshadowed you too, and for the first time in years, you were detached from his fumes—yet somehow, some way, the smoke from his fire would remain in your lungs, continuing to suffocate you even more than it had before. It didn’t give you that breath of fresh air of new friends or a better life; instead, it helped you realize that you didn’t matter. It was a miracle that you even scored Jiwoong as your boyfriend.

But then that begged the question: why did Hyunjae bother spending his time ridiculing you?

From the very beginning, you had always meant something to him, and you couldn’t pinpoint how or why. When there was no competition in academics, he treated it as if there was. Every time you ranted, he would listen, whether it be about him or something else. Even when you talked about how your chicken from the cafeteria was burnt, he would give you his own before calling you stupid for not noticing until you sat down.

He never shrugged you off like you were nothing or shut you down because your emotions were invalid. He entertained you each time with ease, and most importantly, he knew when to respect your boundaries. Hyunjae was probably the most mindful person you knew and could often tell when you were distressed or needed another form of reaction from him.

He knew when to stop.

Yet when it came to the one instance involving Jiwoong, he crossed the line multiple times. Why?

“Hyunjae isn’t here today.”

“Huh?”

“Didn’t show up for a single class.”

Kevin watched you play with your food with a fork, rolling the cold, barely spherical peas around and into the stale rice.

“That’s not like him,” he replied.

“Yeah.”

“I wonder why.”

“I wonder too.” 

After the driest possible conversation in existence, you sighed and dropped your fork into your tray.

“I need to stop forgetting to pack myself lunch. This shit makes me lose my appetite, I swear. We should call the police and tell them the food they’re serving is illegal and a disgrace to this country.” 

“Keep it away before I lose my appetite too.” 

You didn’t react nor respond to what Kevin said, letting the conversation rot as you pouted at your food. The cafeteria was unusually louder today, making it easier to space out into thought.

Kevin took out his sandwich with a wide grin and started eating, grateful he never had to deal with what the school was feeding thanks to his mom, but eventually his eyes shifted over to you. You were unmoving with your gaze locked onto an empty spot on the table, so after moments of debating between asking you what’s wrong and ignoring you to devour his lunch, he opted to set his sandwich aside and stared straight at you.

“Why are you thinking about him?”

That was enough to garner your attention, your head snapping up to stare at your best friend like he was the craziest person you knew for mentioning Hyunjae, much less suggesting that your mind was wrapped around him.

“What?”

“Hyunjae. With his perfect attendance, a day without him should be a blessing, yet you brought up how he didn’t show up today and then moped harder than anyone I’ve ever seen mope. You should be over the moon, dancing on the tables and stealing people’s food, not-...” Kevin waved a finger at you, “whatever this is. You seem out of it.”

“Well it’s not because of Hyunjae, I’ll tell you that,” you snorted. Your eyes fell back down to your tray, and the more you looked at it, the more nauseous you got. You scrunched your nose. “If anything, it’s probably because of this shit food.”

Kevin rolled his eyes before tearing his sandwich into halves. You perked at the sight and ogled the half Kevin taunted you with. You were about to thank him and take it into your possession before Kevin jerked back his arm, making you whine.

“Throw away your food, then I’ll give you it.”

“Fine,” you grumbled. As Kevin returned to his delicious, most scrumptious, packed lunch you had ever seen, you picked up your tray and walked it to the nearest trash can. As you dropped the whole thing inside, you heard your name being called.

“Y/N!”

You whipped around to check to see who it was and smiled at the sight of Eunseo waving at you. You wouldn’t consider her a good friend, but you knew her well enough since she was the vice president of the student council.

She ran over to you with a stack of paper in her arms, relieved to have caught you. 

“Y/N, hi! I’m so glad I found you. I was scared I wouldn’t because of how packed it is.”

She flashed you her usual glowing smile, and you noticed that she was a bit more giddy than usual, making you question why she was choosing to talk to you in the first place. All your conversations normally took place before, during, and after student council meetings, so this was slightly out of character.

“What’s up?” you asked. As you looked at her, you noticed how her outfit was slightly more put together than it normally was. She had on a cute top that suited her chest perfectly and a skirt that you had never seen her wear. 

“Your outfit’s really cute today.”

“Really?!” Her bright demeanor then faded into concern. “Wait, is it too noticeable or out of the blue? Is it bad?”

“No, no. Not at all!” you reassured. “It’s just the right amount of perfect.”

“Great! God, that means the world coming from you. It’s because!...” She stopped to glance around, making sure that no one was eavesdropping, before taking a step closer to whisper. “It’s because I was finally asked out on a date by my crush!”

She could barely contain her excitement, holding back a squeal with her bottom lip latched between her teeth. Her sunshine-like energy made you grin.

“That’s great! I’m glad you’re making progress.” Your eyebrows pinched as you tried to recall the last time Eunseo had updated you about her crush. “You’ve been pining after him for so long—whoever ‘him’ is, anyway.”

The question of who Eunseo liked had always gone unanswered. She never told anyone, not even the ones who knew her best, but she loved gushing about her mystery crush to everyone she knew. All people really knew, you included, was how down bad she was.

A part of you wondered if it was someone you knew—someone pretty like Juyeon or well-known like…Hyunjae.

“Oh, I wish I could tell you, and maybe I will if things go really well and we become official!” She squealed and hopped in her spot, unable to resist giving you a half-hug with her free arm. “This is so exciting, Y/N!”

“I’m really happy for you.” Your smile was genuine until you thought about why she was looking for you, starting to doubt that she called you over just so she could tell you about her date. 

“I’ll let you know how it goes, swear. But! That aside, I also have something for you.”

You knew it.

Your brows raised, and when you didn’t catch on, she gestured to the papers in her arms with guilt.

“I know this is kind of a dick move, and I’m really really sorry, but I promised to put up fliers for prom today. My date is right after my last class.” Her frown had deepened, and for a split second, you found yourself sympathizing with her because who wanted to let down such a cheerful personality, especially when this was life-changing for her?

“So you want me to do it?”

“Exactly! Please, that would be great. It shouldn’t take too long, too.”

You thought about how you would have to give up an evening of playing on your switch or extra time to study for an upcoming exam, but you knew it was your duty as secretary to help out whenever needed.

Not to mention that it would also make you a decent friend not to hold Eunseo back from her soon-to-be love life despite her poor date planning. If you were in her shoes, you would have wanted her to do the same for you too.

“Sure,” you accepted. “Why not?”

“You’re the best, seriously!” She handed you the fliers as she began to fill you in on the extra details.

“I already told Mr. Barajas that I wasn’t feeling well and that you were going to do it, so he said it all worked out and to not worry about it,” she rambled, happy to give the extra weight (both literally and metaphorically) to you. “I just printed these out, so everything should be perfect to go. Oh, and don’t worry about any extras! Just set them on Barajas’s desk when you’re finished. Hyunjae will also be in 142 with tape ready for you.”

The mention of the forbidden name nearly made every cell in your body halt. 

“What?”

Eunseo tilted her head at you, confused, before finally realizing.

“Oh crap, I forgot! I’m so sorry, I really did forget you guys weren’t on good terms. I hope it’s okay that he’s helping you out. I mean, he’s supposed to, but it was meant for him and me to do it together, not you two, so…God, I’m really sorry Y/N.”

Before you could even react to the newfound information, she continued.

“I really have to go now. Thank you again! I promise I’ll make it up to you!” And with her rosy pink cheeks and a stunning shade of red on her lips, she basically skipped away and waved goodbye to you with a smile, so you reciprocated it with an awkward one of your own. 

When she turned her back, your smile immediately dropped and you sighed heavily.

“Have fun on your date,” you mumbled, your eyes falling to fliers in your arms. As you skimmed the one on top, you noticed it was to promote going to prom while also including a big QR code to vote for who should be your school’s prom king and queen. You expected it since it was the last meeting’s topic of discussion, but what you weren’t aware of was who were listed as nominees.

There were eight names listed under ‘Prom Court,’ and while you expected Hyunjae’s, Eunseo’s, and your boyfriend’s names on it, your jaw nearly hit the ground at the sight of your own. 

//

With every passing class period, your anxiety would kick up a notch.

The dread of talking to the face you had been avoiding for two months engulfed you, and it caused you to develop the urge to ditch your current class to go hunt for Jacob, the student council’s historian. You wanted nothing more than to dump the stack of fliers into his arms, and knowing Jacob, he wouldn’t ask any questions. Hell, you were certain that if you asked him nicely, he would do it for you because of how naturally sweet and endearing he was.

But the guilt of ditching your secretary duties kept picking at your skin, and besides, all you had to do was treat Hyunjae like a colleague. That should be easy, right?

As you suffered through the last few minutes of class and your teacher’s incessant ramblings about the upcoming exam, your thoughts drifted over to what would happen the moment you stepped into room 142.

Hyunjae hadn’t shown up to a single class all day, yet he was expected to set up fliers after school. As your thoughts snowballed, you arrived at the baseless conclusion that maybe Eunseo wasn’t aware that Hyunjae was absent today, therefore someone else (like Jacob) would take over. 

Suddenly, your back had straightened with feigned interest in your teacher’s last few words. Something about Jacob being there instead of Hyunjae had excited you; it felt like you were free and that the universe was listening to your prayers. The gamble of seeing whether it would be Hyunjae or Jacob (or literally anyone else) had your right leg bouncing, eyes on the clock, and when the bell rang, you shot up from your seat, backpack over your shoulders and fliers in your arms, before dashing out of the classroom.

You sped down the hallway to 142, Mrs. Zhang’s room for Chemistry, bug-eyed, before having your delusions crushed at the sight of Hyunjae’s stupidly large height leaning against one of the counters. Your feet stood glued to the ground by the doorway, your eyes locked onto him. 

Covered from head to toe in sweats, Hyunjae was immersed in whatever was on his phone, scrolling through something as his brown curls peeked out from inside his hood. Without any hint of him acknowledging your presence, your shattered hopes slowly began to rebuild.

Maybe if you were quiet enough, you could sneak out with the tape and do everything on your own, avoiding him at all. Actually, scratch that. You didn’t even need the tape. All you had to do was go to another teacher’s room, steal their tape for half an hour, and then return it with ease.

The plan was effortless, and you mentally smacked your forehead for not thinking of it earlier. Right as you were about to execute it, your backpack slammed against the doorframe as you turned on your heels. 

“Nice try.”

You groaned out of embarrassment (and slight pain) and forced yourself to turn around. Hyunjae’s phone was now face down on the counter, and his arms were crossed over his abdomen. His face remained stoic as his eyes met yours, wielding a tension you didn’t recognize.

Now that you could properly look at him, you noticed a few details that you hadn’t before, such as the small tear on his lower lip and the bandaid on his cheekbone. If you looked long enough, you could catch light patches of purple across his skin, and the sight hindered all your thoughts, your brain too occupied with piecing together how he ended up like this. 

“What happened?” you blurted, your gaze shooting up from his lips to his eyes.

Hyunjae staggered at your suddenty, but he managed to keep himself stilled, his brows pinching. 

“What do you mean?”

Even if Hyunjae didn’t mean to, his question became an invitation for your unfiltered thoughts to spill out of your mouth.

“You didn’t show up for any of our classes today,” you began, “but now you’re here? For some stupid fliers? You’re barely dressed properly like you normally are, your hair isn’t straightened, you look pale, Jae, and what’s up with the bruises or the bandaid on your cheek–”

“Are you seriously psychoanalyzing me?” he asked with a scoff. There was no humor in his tone. Instead, it looked as if he was irritated, perhaps even more than you were. 

Hyunjae barely met your eyes, and his arms closed himself off from you. 

“What–?”

“You’re evaluating me like I’m some sort of lab project, Y/N.”

“No, no I’m not,” you rejected. “I’m just saying things are a little off.” You kept your eyes firm on his, even as he pushed himself off the counter with his phone and made his way over to you. “And you know, you really can’t blame me for being somewhat worried when one, you don’t show up, and two, you look like a whole mess—”

“Just hand over the fliers—” he interrupted, gritting his teeth as he outstretched his arm in your direction. You dodged him by turning your body 180 degrees and stood your ground.

“What happened?” you repeated, this time more firmly.

Hyunjae looked at you, a blank expression on his face, before turning back around to grab the roll of tape left on the teacher’s desk. When he returned, he shoved it into your arms while simultaneously stealing half the stack. You protested with an exclaimed ‘Hey!’ yet he didn’t bat an eye and skimmed over the contents of the flier on top.

Bothered by his lack of response, you frowned and made sure to block the doorway, refusing to let him leave until you received answers.

“Why are you acting like this? Pretending that I’m not even—”

“I’ll do upstairs, you do downstairs,” he muttered.

“Did you get into a fight? Why weren’t you here today? Why are you here now—”

“You’d think you’d know,” he finally answered, pushing past you like you weighed none less than a feather.

Your brain had fully malfunctioned at that point, unable to decipher what he meant as Hyunjae walked off to the nearest staircase. As his footsteps echoed down the hall, you thought about what he was implying yet came to no resolution. Did he assume that you were caught up in your school’s latest gossip? Or that you were the main admin for his biggest fan page on Instagram?

The idea made you snort, and you scowled bitterly at his childish attitude. It wasn’t like you were a complete stranger intruding on his personal life—hell, you felt like you deserved an explanation because of how you were forced to do this with him. 

As you stormed off past the remaining lingering students to the nearest bulletin board, you questioned how you were going to do this on your own. 

You had put up fliers countless times in the past few years yet never alone. Luckily, you had a general idea of where the fliers should go when it came to the school’s hallways, but as you approached your first destination, you struggled with ripping off pieces of tape while holding the stack at the same time. It would’ve been easier with a partner by your side, one who either did the tape ripping or placing of the fliers, but you weren’t desperate enough to fall into the role of a helpless princess in need of her pretty (useless) prince. 

After some trial and error, you found a method that consisted of setting the stack on the ground occasionally so you could rip off pieces of tape. Then you would slap said pieces of tape onto your wrist, having them readily available as you put up a few fliers at a time.

Although slightly time-consuming, it was working well and kept you at a steady pace until you heard crashing footsteps behind you from afar. Without paying any mind to it, you bit back your curiosity in order to focus on the wall in front of you, but then you made the mistake of taking a step back, bumping into the person who was sprinting. 

You lost your balance and fell forward before catching yourself shortly after. However, the fliers had already flown out of your arms, scattering across and down the long hallway.

Ready to curse out the offender for running down the hallway, you were surprised when you saw that it was Eunseo behind you, pouring out apologies while a loopy grin was smacked onto her face.

You steadied your anger and told her it was okay, getting down onto your knees to collect all the fliers. Her ‘sorry’s could only go so far with her smeared lipstick, a dazed gaze, and her hair holding the mold to someone else’s (presumably her crush’s) hands in them, but you still excused her, knowing that she was over the moon right now.

“It’s okay, Eunseo, I promise.” You forced out a chuckle as you crawled to scavenge for the ones that flew a few feet away.

“I really didn’t mean to,” she pouted, but it was shortly followed up with bubbly giggles. “God, Y/N, can you believe this? Oh, it’s going so well! I think I love him, I do.”

“Good for you,” you grumbled, hoping that she didn’t hear it as you continued to move down the hallway, hating how far the fliers had escaped from you. You also hated how she just stood there without intent on helping you at all. 

“I have to really go now. Got volleyball practice soon, but I think I’m seeing him tomorrow too!” She waved you goodbye.

And just like that, she continued running off. 

You stared at how you were only able to collect half the mess, hating how Eunseo had somehow managed to delay you even further from being in the comfort of your bed. You were also salty at how her date was taking place at the school, wishing she could’ve dragged him around while she taped stuff up before getting dick-downed of some sort.

Deciding that she and her business weren’t worth your time, you continued to pick everything up as quickly as you could, wanting nothing more than to go home.

When you finally finished collecting every last flier, you were prepared to get back into the groove of things before feeling your phone vibrate in the side pocket of your backpack. Wondering if it was something important, you took it out and beamed at the idea of it being a new message from Jiwoong.

Dating him felt like falling in love with him all over again whenever he texted. Your heart would pound in your chest when you thought about him and explode whenever he gave you his attention and time. You were addicted to him, especially knowing that he was yours after liking him since middle school.

So to say you were disappointed was far worse than an understatement. It was from a number you hadn’t saved yet always recognized and undoubtedly remembered by heart.

Of course it was Hyunjae.

You had Hyunjae’s phone number due to previous class projects and group chats, but you had never once saved it because you thought he was undeserving of being a contact in your phone. Nonetheless, with how the years have passed and how much his number infiltrates every group chat you were in, it was only fair that your brain had unintentionally memorized all ten digits.

The message he sent consisted of him saying that he was done with the fliers, and you rolled your eyes. Even after the way he treated you earlier, he still chose to let you know and brag about how fast he was. 

You shoved your phone away vigorously, ready to return to your slapping-fliers-on-walls duty, before perking at the sound of footsteps behind you once more.

Automatically assuming it was Eunseo or another student staying after for a club or sport, you were stunned when you heard his voice. 

“You’re not even halfway yet?”

In no fucking universe are you turning around; not for him.

“Go gloat somewhere else,” you snapped. The next flier you taped up was nearly slammed onto the wall, but Hyunjae was left unphased by your sudden outburst. He stood next to you and remained quiet, even when you left to place the next flier a few feet away on the opposite wall.

When he didn’t follow, you sighed out of relief, yet somehow you couldn’t help but peek at him, eyeing his hands that were tucked into the pockets of his sweatpants. He was staring straight at the lopsided flier you had put up, and when you decided you had enough of peering at him, he was back by your side.

 “What are you doing?” you grumbled. He was the one who pushed you away, yet now here he was, glued to your side like how he was two months ago. 

“You’re taking too long.”

“I had a mishap,” you explained, “but that’s none of your concern.” The lines on your forehead bunched up, and you waved him off, bending down to place the stack on the ground. Figuring it wasn’t weird at all, you continued your method of ripping off pieces of tape and slapping it onto your wrist.

And Hyunjae was totally judging.

“You can’t be serious.”

“Just go home.”

Despite being on the ground and sitting on your heels, you could physically feel the heat on the back of your head due to his eyes burning a hole into your skull, and for a split second, you knew exactly what he was thinking.

“I can do it myself,” you explained. 

“What are you even doing?” 

“Can you just go?” You picked up the stack once again as you rose to your feet, doing your best to avoid whatever look was on Hyunjae’s face. He was probably stifling a laugh or keeping his expression smug, but when you did cave and peek, his face was still solemn, his eyes on your wrist with concern.

“You’re struggling.”

“Thank you for your observation, Mr. Obvious,” you retorted.

“Let me do it.”

Taken aback, you whipped your head over to his direction.

“You’re kidding.”

“You don’t even want to be here,” he reasoned through gritted teeth. “Just go, and you can thank me later.”

“Thank you?!” Appalled at his audacity, you couldn’t help but laugh out of disbelief. “Seriously, Hyunjae? You want me to thank you for stealing my job? Again? You can’t be fucking serious.”

“Because you can’t take any criticism ever, or in this case, any form of help, so just let me do it.”

Hyunjae was eerily calm about the whole ordeal, his energy far from matching yours.

“I do take help,” you refuted. “I just don’t take yours, and neither do I need it, too.”

“You’re so goddamn stubborn.” And within a blink of an eye, he had managed to snatch the stack of fliers from you. 

“Hey!” you yelled, feeling as if it was deja vu from earlier (you really needed to step up your defense), and reached out to take them back, but he was quick to turn his body, shielding them from you.

“Give me the tape and go,” he urged, emotionless. The Hyunjae in front of you now was someone you truly didn’t recognize because the Hyunjae you knew would have made fun of you and held the fliers above your head, teasing you for being so weak.

Yet he stood still, creating a barrier between you and the duty that was forced upon you. You didn’t want to be here anyway, yet you were so insistent on making sure Hyunjae wasn’t stealing your work again. You weren’t incapable, and you hated how he always managed to be faster.

Even now, he was miles away from being playful with you, and yet he still had a way to shove it in your face.

“Hyunjae, I swear—”

“Give me the tape, and you can run off to your little boyfriend waiting for you by the entrance.” 

Your lips parted at his words, eyes wide as you worked to comprehend his words. You questioned how he knew about Jiwoong’s whereabouts, how he knew that Jiwoong was waiting and that you didn’t, but knowing that he was serious, you reluctantly gave up and dropped the roll of tape on the ground, forcing him to pick it up. 

You were sick of constantly arguing with him, and even if he was lying about Jiwoong, at least you would be away from Hyunjae. There was no point in fighting for your dignity anymore, not when Hyunjae’s narcissism was insufferable.

By walking away with heavy and quick strides, you hoped he felt humiliated by how poorly he was treating you—how he had always treated you like this.

As much as you wanted it to be true, you hoped Hyunjae was lying just so you had more evidence against his self-absorbed and shitty personality, but alas, you found Jiwoong standing precisely where Hyunjae said he was.

Regardless, all stress and frustrations had lifted from your being, and you called out to your boyfriend with a smile that would make your cheeks ache in minutes. 

“Woong!” You waved your hands with a small bounce in your steps as you rushed over to him.

Your boyfriend’s head shot up, surprised to see you. His utter shock quickly switches to one of sheer happiness, tucking his device away before opening his arms for you.

“Hey, baby!”

You tossed yourself into his embrace, hugging him tight after pressing a quick kiss to his lips.

“What are you doing here?” With your face in his neck, your voice came out muffled, and it made Jiwoong laugh.

“Had to stay after to discuss my grades with a teacher, then I decided to stay back a bit for you.” He cooed and kissed the top of your head, holding you incredibly close. When you pulled back, his hands had moved from behind your backpack to your hips instead, holding them as you stared up at him.

“You were waiting for me?” you asked, eyes wide with stars in them.

“Of course I was, baby.” 

You were radiating, feeling happier than ever. The last time you saw Jiwoong was a week ago, and with your clashing schedules, you two very rarely get the opportunity to make plans. Your hands rested atop his shoulders, and when he pulled you in for a kiss, you smiled.

But then it fell.

Something felt off.

//

If someone were to inquire Hyunjae about who his heart belonged to, your name would be his answer—whether he intended to say it or not. 

Hyunjae had always been considered the school’s favorite. His intelligence may not be up to par with others, but his authority was what made him a prominent member of your high school. Some blame it on his looks, but most were aware enough to know that wasn’t the case.

Hyunjae knew how to think on his feet, and his problem-solving skills outwitted everyone within his grade level. Reaching tranquillity had never been an issue for him, allowing him to be levelheaded while making decisions. He emitted an aura that made classmates truly listen to him and the ideas he shared, and overall, it made him a great contender to lead every group and organization he was in. 

Additionally, Hyunjae’s heart was what won over most people. His lack of vulnerability seemed to be his only flaw, but it was an obstacle he could overlook when it came to empathizing with others. By actively being involved in the community through volunteering and holding fundraisers, everyone could recognize Hyunjae’s devotion to hope for humanity. 

All these traits were what led Hyunjae up onto the pedestal and the public eye, a household name for all families in the district. Titles and awards naturally gravitated towards him throughout the years, resulting in him winning the vote as president of your school’s student council and enough scholarships to provide him a full ride at most universities.

It was safe to say that competition against Lee Hyunjae was sparse, and you were no different. 

Your grades would teeter around his standard, hence how you two collectively ended up in the same classes, but aside from that, you had nothing else that could compare to what he was capable of.

Except for one thing; your fury.

There was an inferno inside you at all times, and instead of your body shielding off your heart with steel, people around you would come to find out that your heart was the reason for that large blaze of fire, possessing a passion unlike any other. 

Hyunjae had never once seen a peer with as much fight as you. It was a trait only you encapsulated, one that you weren’t afraid to express. You stood up for yourself and your beliefs, and it was easy to pick fights with him when he had been troubling you from the very moment you two were assigned to sit next to each other in seventh-grade algebra. 

Hyunjae yearned for you ever since, his only want being your attention. You gave him the drive to succeed in high school and thrive in his senior year, and he was positive that he wouldn’t be doing this well without a reason to show off in front of you. He wanted your praise, your acknowledgment, but he loved the chase the most. 

Unfortunately, that was the exact reason he ended up here.

The chase was what made him fall for every part of you, wanting nothing more than your lips on his and the ability to have you by his side at all times, but it was also what landed you with your current boyfriend.

It was like his life was a video game with God giving him the hardest difficulty setting by making sure you were obsessed with someone undeserving of all that he wanted. There wasn’t even a chance of you two possibly being friends in your eyes. Meanwhile, Hyunjae would argue that you two had more chemistry than any other couple in your class, but that hope was crushed, shredded, and stomped on when he found out you still devoted your love to Jiwoong.

Regardless, it didn’t change who you were as a person. Your heart was still just as large and beautiful, and your drive to succeed hadn’t lessened. The bickering never faltered, and it wasn’t like Hyunjae was opposed whenever you expressed disgust at the thought of him being turned on because of you (and that was because he found the idea of you thinking about him hot—yes, his expectations were that low). 

So it was why after two months of almost zero to no contact, you treating him as if those months didn’t exist created the largest dilemma he had ever faced. He spent the next week thinking about your intentions and why you seemed to care so much, specifically right after when Hyunjae had willed himself to believe that he meant jackshit to you. You effortlessly toyed with his heart, leaving him in everlasting misery, while you seemed to do completely fine.

What was a typical and ideal lifestyle for you was a nightmare and tormenting hellhole for Hyunjae. He didn’t just crave the warmth and comfort from your undying flames.

He wanted to burn.

Insanity engulfed him on the days spent without you, leaving him to wonder why you had to make things extensively worse by pointing out his absence or how he had put less effort into his hair. Why did it seem like the concern you expressed was genuine? Why pretend that you cared for him as much as he cared for you?

He was going insane—so insane that he drove to a college party with three other friends in his sedan on a Wednesday night. 

It was being held by a fraternity he and his friends were far more than familiar with thanks to Jongin, an upperclassman he met in his sophomore year and remained friends with since then. The beginning of the senior year marked the origin of parties and hook-ups in weak sporadic attempts to get over you. 

At this rate, Hyunjae could argue that he was more experienced than half of the current college freshmen class. Getting girls in bed was the easiest part; the hardest part was forgetting about you. From what was a method created to move on from you became one that prepared him for when you wanted sex with him. 

But with your constant longing for Jiwoong, Hyunjae made sure that this party would be different.

Although accustomed to having sex with various women, Hyunjae had never been one to drink. This was a fact about him that raised brows, specifically Jongin’s when he first tried urging Hyunjae with a drink, but tonight he vowed to change that. He was normally their designated driver, but when Hyunjae informed Sangyeon of his plan, the elder was more than delighted to remain sober so Hyunjae could get a taste of alcohol.

“Hey, man! It’s about time!” Jongin exclaimed the instant he found out about Hyunjae’s willingness to drink, pulling a fresh bottle out of the cooler specifically for his friend.

“That’s what I told him!” Sangyeon projected his voice over the music, giving Hyunjae a supportive pat on the back.

Hyunjae rolled his eyes at his friends’ remarks and thanked Jongin for the beer, hanging around by the counter as the three conversed and caught up. The two laughed at the way Hyunjae’s face scrunched up at the taste, Sangyeon shoving him lightly with the claim that Hyunjae was being overdramatic. 

With his earlier mindless decision of tossing on a mesh long-sleeve shirt over his black tank top, Hyunjae had attracted another partygoer by his side momentarily after his first sip. She wrapped her arms around one of his and inserted herself into the conversation with hopes of getting Hyunjae in bed by the end of the night, and crazily enough, he considered it for a moment before feeling his phone vibrate in his back pocket.

Normally it would be something he’d ignore, but it remained persistent, signifying that he was receiving a call. He didn’t know who would be calling at this hour—well, aside from Minghao and his usual complaints about Hyunjae partying as a high schooler on a school night. 

After setting the glass down on the counter to grab his phone, any urgency to intoxicate himself as quickly as possible vanished the very second he saw your name glowing on his screen. With an awkward retraction of his arm and a forced cough, Hyunjae excused himself and answered the call.

“Hello?”

With music pounding inside his ear canals, it was expected that he couldn’t hear anything you were saying. He navigated through various crowds to reach the entrance of the house, his heart replicating the booming vibrations from the loudspeakers as he prayed that you wouldn’t hang up on him.

“Okay, I…I should be free now,” he stammered after stepping outside. The sudden stillness of Mother Nature was a drastic change from the party scene, coercing him to focus on his racing heartbeat and the anxiety accumulating in his tightening chest. He was breathing heavily, both from pushing through people in a rush and also because of you. 

You never failed to render him weak and helpless, leaving him like a puppy longing for their owner’s guidance.

There was a silence, but he could hear your gentle breaths hitting your phone.

“I need a ride.”

Hyunjae blinked, his body tensing up, as the many thoughts in his brain scrambled to make meaning of what you meant. However, it didn’t matter because you hung up shortly after, leaving him alone to revel in your words.

Your bluntness and suddenty made Hyunjae malfunction, his thoughts leading him to question if he had even heard you correctly. Rarely did you ever reach out to him, and what could you need him for? Especially after lashing out at him and ignoring him for two months? Of course, there was that one day a week ago when you two were forced to talk together, the day he was given a one-day suspension, but you two returned to treating each other like strangers like it was natural.

He stared at his phone in hopes of receiving more information, that you’d perhaps call again to reconfirm or say you had the wrong number. He felt like he was dreaming—that the person he had wanted for so long needed him for once, but he couldn’t help but also believe that this may be the beginning of another nightmare. 

But it was you, and Hyunjae was willing to risk it.

After checking his call logs to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating, he rushed back into the fraternity house, thankful he didn’t proceed with drinking any more than he did. 

He found everyone exactly where he had left them (the girl included) and announced his departure. The girl made sure Hyunjae knew how disappointed she was, but that was his last concern as he grabbed the beer bottle and handed it to Sangyeon, giving him a pat on the back.

“Drink up and find an Uber.”

“No fucking way you’re leaving us this soon, man.” Jongin shook his head in disapproval, his forearms resting against the countertop.

“Another time, I promise, yeah?” Hyunjae started walking away, waving to them as his heart continued to thrum in his chest.

“He’s lying,” Sangyeon snorted, taking a swig before bidding Hyunjae a bitter goodbye. “You owe me!"

Hyunjae ran out of the house, his legs making quick and long strides as he ran to his parked car down the block. His newfound adrenaline made him think about what he was sacrificing to be with you. Was leaving the party and betraying his friends worth spending even a second with you? What if you were asking him to drive you and your boyfriend somewhere? Could his heart even deal with being used like that?

But as much as Hyunjae hated it, he knew he was making the right choice. The self-respect he had for himself was buried six feet deep beneath the surface of the earth when it came to you. 

God, he really hoped he wasn’t hallucinating.

For a split second, Hyunjae truly debated what he was doing after getting into his car. He was already driving, but he didn’t know where to go. Luckily, it didn’t take you long to send him a text with your location, and it was a place he was familiar with. 

It was a park that he often frequented as a kid since it resided by his old neighborhood, and he was thankful he knew exactly where to go because he knew he would’ve definitely crashed the car while pulling up your location on his GPS. Hyunjae was doubtful it was the alcohol in his system making his fingers shake and his mind uneasy. He blamed you for his hysteria, one that had developed over years of endless longing. 

Luckily the drive wasn’t long thanks to the roads being mainly void of other vehicles (and maybe he did speed a few times, but he considered it justified). Before pulling into the parking lot, he spotted a lone figure curled up on a nearby bench. A small weight had been lifted off of him, relieved it was just you, and he parked aimlessly while his eyes rested on you.

You seemed unphased by his added presence, your arms unmoving as they stayed wrapped around your legs. The bench you were sitting in was facing away from the parking lot, but with his headlights illuminating the view in front of you, you certainly had to know he was there. 

In an ideal world, Hyunjae would leave his car, join you by your side, and, if he was lucky, he’d pull you into his arms and hold you close against his chest. He wanted to be there for you in whatever way he could, but he ended up being a deer in headlights, too afraid to make the wrong move and lose you again.

He sat there for a minute, watching you, and as soon as he received the confidence to reach for the handle of his door, you were up on your feet. His fingers paused midair as he traced your movements, his arm eventually falling to his side as you approach his car. 

Despite how slow his mind was working, Hyunjae knew to unlock the car right as you opened it (he would’ve died out of embarrassment if he had forgotten), and neither of you greeted the other.

Without any explanation from you, Hyunjae refrained from staring at you like he normally would, but your outfit made it incredibly difficult. It wasn’t much, just an oversized long-sleeved shirt that reached your thighs, but it was far from the usual clothes he’d seen you wear, like jeans and a nice-fitting blouse. For a moment, he believed you had no pants on, but then he knocked some sense into himself, realizing that you were probably wearing shorts that were hidden.

While Hyunjae attempted to keep his composure and respect your boundaries, you were eyeing him shamelessly, once again analyzing every detail about him. Beads of sweat pooled up on the back of his neck, and his hair was straightened yet fuzzy. As your eyes trailed downwards, you noticed how the mesh hugged his biceps, catching every crease that defined his muscles. He was quiet, his index finger resting against his lips. 

Where did he even come from?

And why was he so quick to listen?

You held back your tongue from dumping out your thoughts, knowing your questions would end up unanswered like before. Your body instinctively rested against the divot between the car door and your seat, keeping your distance from Hyunjae. He was meant to be a stranger, perhaps someone you loathed, yet there was an odd comfort that encased you from him just sharing the same air as you.

You cleared your throat, turning your head to look away when he flinched and snapped his gaze towards you.

“Drive.”

Your demand was no louder than a whisper, but Hyunjae picked it up effortlessly and was already backing out.

“Where to?”

“Anywhere.” Hyunjae raised a brow at your answer, and you buried yourself further into his seat, directing your gaze out the door. “Just-...anywhere, Jae.”

The nickname had his throat tightening and his chest leaping, nodding in your direction as he drove on autopilot. With no destination in mind, he strolled through familiar roads, his fingers tapping against the wheel. 

You stayed silent, creating a tension that was unbearably thick, yet none of you felt the need to leave; neither of you wanted to leave the other, even if it meant having to deal with the looming elephant in the room (or in this case, Hyunjae’s car).

After spotting the recreational center from afar and its empty parking lot, he instinctively pulled in. There wasn’t a proper explanation for why he decided it’d make a great destination, especially when it was the place that created a rift in your relationship with him, but it felt right.

It was empty, open, and serene—a perfect place to stay as the moon shined.

Hyunjae stepped out of the car after parking in the middle of it, and when you didn’t follow, he moved to your side and opened the door. He was hesitant but took the risk of offering his hand to you, a warm, nervous smile on his face. He wanted you to know he was there to listen, to be there for you, because, Lord, he would hand you the world if he could.

“I’m not in the mood for walking,” you mumbled, but Hyunjae shook his head.

“We’re not going to walk, I promise.”

Your eyes flickered up to his briefly, skeptical of what he had planned, but ultimately caved. You ignored his hand, and he pulled it back with regret. When you stood there, your eyes on the sky, he closed the door behind you and guided you to the hood of his car.

Without a second thought, he sat on top of it and gestured for you to do the same.

“I sit here all the time. Helps me think.” He leaned back against his windshield, his hands holding the back of his head as he kept his eyes on the sky. When you didn’t move, he started to feel stupid, wondering if you two were better off in the car, but then you joined him. 

You copied his position, staring upwards as your hands rested over your abdomen. 

Hyunjae opted to keep to himself, deciding that he didn’t want to make this worse for the two of you. Instead, he fixated his thoughts on the stars in the sky.

There were only a few, but it was a rare sight due to the constant air pollution in your city, so he considered it a miracle. You, on the other hand, were spacing out in thought, and Hyunjae could tell through his occasional peeks. Without much control, his eyes started tracing down your arms. They then landed on where the hem of your shirt rested, now looking at your bare thighs.

Feeling as if he just reverted back to being the shyest virgin in the country, he gulped and immediately looked elsewhere, trying to get you off his mind despite you being right next to him. His racing heart was all that he could hear, and now he wondered if you could hear it too—if you knew how much you affected him.

And your voice broke the silence.

“How long have you known?”

Okay, maybe his brain did fall out of his skull because Hyunjae had no idea what you were talking about. He turned his head and caught how you stared up at the sky. Your eyes were glossy, holding the reflections of the whole galaxy within them. They sparkled, and for a beat, Hyunjae had forgotten your question, too infatuated with your beauty. 

His silence resulted in you turning your head, gaze meeting his, and that was when he noticed the tears.

“About Jiwoong and Eunseo.”

Your light, your flames, his burning desire; all were gone in a flash.

Your voice was delicate, and Hyunjae knew that with one move, he could break you.

Directing his gaze heavenward, Hyunjae sighed and brought his arms down to rest over his chest. Somehow he was able to feel all the pain you were experiencing, his heart twisting while his stomach churned and sloshed around in his body. He thought about how to respond as he chewed on the inside of his lip, questioning if he should answer at all to avoid hurting you.

But you asked, and as always, Hyunjae delivered.

“I don’t think I ever really knew until last week,” he explained, “but I could always tell.” Suddenly, the fight from a week ago had resurrected, and Hyunjae was forced to relive it all.

The hallways were empty when Hyunjae left the broadcasting room, a backpack strap slung over his shoulder while the other dangled behind him. He was in the middle of scrolling through his emails when he picked up on the sound of Jiwoong’s voice around the corner. 

His footsteps halted, and Hyunjae caught Jiwoong’s fatal words.

“How does tomorrow sound?”

Eunseo’s squeals followed after, and Hyunjae stood motionless.

At first, Hyunjae had no thoughts circulating in his brain, but after hearing their lips collide, he started coming up with solutions, such as interrupting or taking a video to send to you. Unfortunately, before he could act on either of them, he heard footsteps dashing off, practically skipping, as the two bidded one another goodbye. 

Hyunjae couldn’t pinpoint the reasoning behind his upcoming actions, but he knew how to describe how he felt. 

Anger was the first and only emotion to surge up within him, his fingers instinctively balling up into fists. His muscles had tightened while a forest fire ran rampant through his veins, causing his blood to boil. 

Then with quick strides, Hyunjae shoved his phone away and made a sharp turn around the corner, tossing his backpack on the ground after spotting Jiwoong against the lockers. The latter had a dazed look on his face, his lips curled into a smirk as he typed away on his phone, but that was changed once he looked up at the sound of Hyunjae’s backpack crashing against the ground in front of him.

There wasn’t a second in between Jiwoong’s face of surprise and Hyunjae’s arm being raised, and before Jiwoong could react, Hyunjae’s fist had slammed into his jaw. 

It was a blur from there, but Hyunjae knew he had won even after authorities dragged him off Jiwoong’s body. He had received a few jabs in return, but it was nothing compared to the black eye Hyunjae gave him.

The fact that Jiwoong managed to cover it up with makeup the day after was a miracle, and no one in the school knew about the fight since it happened after school. Hyunjae wanted it to stay that way, but a selfish, cruel part of him wished that everyone knew how sick your boyfriend was.

Well, now he was unsure if he was still your boyfriend. 

Hyunjae turned his head back towards you, his cheek meeting the cold metal of his car.

You pursed your lips at his response and nodded slowly. If it were any other day, you wouldn’t have believed him. There was no universe where you’d choose to listen to Hyunjae over Jiwoong, but after a week of investigating and getting your head out of your ass, you found out on your own terms, and all the pieces made sense.

“I didn’t mean to.”

Hyunjae’s voice jerked you out of your thoughts, and as you adjusted to look back at him, you were surprised to still find him staring at you.

“I’m not a violent person, Y/N,” he whispered, an enduring hope lingering in his eyes. He wanted you to believe him, and for once, you did; you truly understood the man you hated most.

“I know, Jae.”

Hyunjae eased at your words, and the two of you fell back into a more comfortable yet aching silence. His fingers drummed against his abdomen, and after a while, he got sick of looking at the same four stars, so he closed his eyes, focusing on enjoying the light breeze instead. His heart was still racing, but it was less alarming. Regardless, he hated knowing that he potentially contributed to how much you were hurting right now.

Maybe if he had done something to prevent it earlier, whether it be telling you as soon as he found out or keeping completely out of your business so you could live in bliss, or, if he wasn’t so scared, he could’ve asked you to be his far before Jiwoong had. Maybe it wouldn’t have changed much, but Hyunjae would never know since he never tried, and now he was going to beat himself over it because now you’re devastated over losing your boyfriend and it was potentially his faul—

You laughed.

Hyunjae snapped his head towards you, his brows raised at your sudden change in mood—but it wasn’t the type of laugh he expected. Your laugh was one filled with pain, and he watched you shake your head, trying to refuse the tears that were rapidly welling up in your eyes once more. You sniffed and wiped the tears away with the back of your hand, choosing to look in the opposite direction because the last thing you wanted was for Hyunjae to see you vulnerable.

“It’s stupid,” you murmured. “This entire thing is stupid. I’m so fucking dumb.”

His lips parted to interject, to tell you that you were, in fact, ‘not dumb,’ but he clamped his mouth shut, knowing that his words probably wouldn’t help. From what he’d learned in the past, you liked it least when he tried telling you otherwise, no matter the situation. 

“I should’ve known. I did know. The whole world knew. Even you knew, but it makes me think, was Eunseo just flocking around, flaunting to everyone that she had a crush on my boyfriend and managed to win him over? I just—I…I don’t know-...” You paused to catch your breath, beginning to choke on your tears as your chest shook, “I don’t know what I did wrong, you know?”

You shut your eyes, allowing the pain to engulf you. You knew fully well that your punishment was to deal with the pain, but you felt like you didn’t deserve it—that you deserved none of this. Why was this a penalty for being in love?

It was humiliating having everyone witness the reality you shielded from yourself, choosing hope and love over the truth. 

“I just never felt more stupid in my life, and I feel even more stupid knowing that I still love him.”

Hyunjae sucked in his lips, gnawing on them as he bit back all his feelings, from his brain shredding to his heart weeping.

“I love him so much that I would let him do it to me all over again because I keep thinking he’d be better. I know he can be better, so why-...It’s just- Why do I do this to myself?”

Tears cascaded down your cheeks, each one leaving behind a trail for others to fall. They started pouring out of you rapidly, soon sobbing at the heart-wrenching pain of being betrayed by everyone in your life, Hyunjae included, because why, out of everyone, was he here for you when he should be the last person who cared?

You always wanted Hyunjae to be the antagonist of your life story, to have him as your biggest enemy and threat, so why was everyone else but him hurting you? Why was the villain of your fantasy taking the role of your knight in shining armor?

And yet, as much as it pained Hyunjae to process all your emotions, his mind wasn’t running correctly; he had you alone for the first time in months. He wanted nothing more than to pull you in his arms and whisper words of comfort in your ears, knowing you deserved it more than anyone, but he also wanted to shake you awake and slap you out of your misery, praying that you’d forget about Jiwoong; that right now, you being vulnerable was his chance to swoop in, to set whatever you wanted him to into flames, as long as if it meant you’d end up okay. 

You sat up because if you lied down any longer, you would’ve started drowning in your own tears. Your sleeves were soaked, and he sat up alongside you, figuring that he should do something about it.

Hyunjae got back onto his feet and stood in front of you. He barely knew what he was doing, but that didn’t stop him from replacing your sleeves with his cold, clammy hands over your cheeks. There wasn’t a time that Hyunjae could recall where he had been this gentle with someone, and when you didn’t push him away, he tilted your head up to look at him.

Even with tears running down your cheeks, you looked angelic as ever. 

Each droplet mirrored a star from the sky, and your eyes sparkled as they stayed locked on his.

“Take me,” you whispered, and Hyunjae’s whole world stopped. 

“...What?” Hyunjae had only intended to wipe your tears away with the pads of his hands, perhaps whisper something along the lines of him being here for you for the night (and the rest of his life, let’s be honest), yet your first words were—no, he had to have been hallucinating.

Your hands trembled as they reached for his wrist, and although you were severely broken, the grip your fingers created was firm.

“Please.”

Like a moth to a flame, Hyunjae admired how pretty you looked, your lips plump and eyes wide, and he wanted nothing more than to take you into his backseat and treat you the way he’d always wanted to, especially after hearing your pleas, but he knew better. You both knew better. 

“What exactly are you implying?” he asked, feeling like you had just inhaled all his oxygen and left him breathless. 

You released his wrist and opted to hold onto his sleeve, tugging on it as you tried to get him to understand you.

“I want it to hurt, Jaehyun.”

Your tears were gone, and there was a hint of dominance in your tone that would’ve had him dropped to his knees in front of you. You were also one of the very few who resorted to calling him Jae, and now his actual name. He favored Hyunjae, but after hearing ‘Jaehyun’ from your lips, his preference had completely made a turnaround. 

But Hyunjae worked to collect his thoughts, fully aware that this was wrong and he’d have to be the bigger person here. As much as he hated himself for giving up the perfect opportunity to have the girl of his dreams, he couldn’t ignore the large concern over your current mental state.

“You’re not thinking straight, Y/N,” he reasoned softly, his fingers reaching up to brush your hair out of your face, and for a second, Hyunjae swore he felt the alcohol kicking in—or perhaps it was you instead. The thought of being able to have you right now, to touch you and press his hands over your skin, to have you as his for just this night, was so intoxicating that he was seconds away from foaming at the mouth.

“I don’t need to think straight. I don’t want to think at all.”

Everything felt hotter and tighter, but he kept his composure, though with his eyes dropping to your begging lips and then your delicate fingers, he knew he was beginning to lose whatever was left of his sanity. 

But he also knew you were using him; you had to be. There was no other explanation. It was only minutes ago when you professed how you continued to feel about Jiwoong—that your heart still belonged to him, and Hyunjae was allowed nowhere near it. He was your backup, your second option, yet that happened to be better than nothing, right?

Especially when he could have you right here, right now. 

“You’re using me.”

Your expression didn’t falter.

“Then say no. Make us go back into your car and drive me home.” Your hand dropped from holding onto his sleeve but that was so you could wrap your arms around his neck, slowly bringing yourself closer to him. His cheeks were flushed as his mind flooded with possibilities of what could happen. Never had you ever wanted him, and he’d been dreaming of a moment like this for years. Your tear-stained cheeks, your pouty red lips—he wanted all of you.

“But you won’t,” you whispered, your breath hitting his skin. Your eyes landed on his lips, now craving him as much as he craved you. You needed a release, an outlet, to justify Jiwoong being better than Hyunjae. Hyunjae was worse in every way possible, and you wanted him to prove that to you. “You’d do anything I’d say, wouldn’t you?”

“What makes you say that?” Little did you know Hyunjae was crumbling inside, completely melting as his fingers grew weak at the idea of your lips on his. His hands, although wary, traveled to your waist, feeling your curves before trailing his hands down to your hips to grip them.

“You love me, don’t you?”

His heart stuttered, all words caught up in his throat, but he knew there was no defending himself—not when he was practically drooling at every move you made; he was hyperaware of the hand playing with the hair on his nape, the way your lips nearly hovered over his, and how your tears glistened under the moonlight.

His entire existence was confirmation of your words, and you knew it.

“You’d do anything for me, Jae. What’s stopping you now?”

There was a stillness as you two stared at one another. He swallowed and pulled slightly back.

He knew better.

“You don’t want me.” He was brokenhearted, a part of him understanding that you’d never be his, yet he wanted you in so many ways, wishing to have your mewls fill his ears and the smell of sex staining his clothes. The bulge in his pants was forming and pressing up against the tight confinement, making him groan. 

He dropped his head downwards, his forehead leaning to rest against yours, as he closed his eyes and did his best to regulate his breathing—repeating in his head and out loud, again.

He knew better.

“You’re using me.”

You both knew better.

Yet with your lips ghosting his and your eyes half-hooded, you were prepared to give into the dark side.

“And I say take advantage of it.”

Hyunjae dived and pressed his lips onto yours, hunger driving his every movement. There was no stopping when he felt your lips curling up into a grin, his hands shifting to wrap around your torso to drag you closer. His heart burst at how perfectly his lips molded with yours, and it seemed as if there was fire shooting up into the sky and exploding—they weren’t fireworks, and the explosion was far bigger and more dangerous. It lit the entirety of the sky, the moon and stars included, into flames, a desire unlike any other.

Your left hand pressed firm against the back of his neck while the other traveled through his hair. Meanwhile, his hands had snuck beneath your shirt and felt for your lower back. Heavy breaths left the two of you as desperation crept through your veins, dictating your every movement. 

The cold touch from his hands ignited your nervous system, every sense activated and overstimulated by Hyunjae as you released a breathy moan into his mouth.

You didn’t want him, but fuck, you needed him.

When you would pull back, his lips would chase yours, and you two fell into an endless cycle. He couldn’t even fathom how you were pulling away for air when you were his oxygen. Maybe you weren’t oxygen itself, but the fumes you emitted had already replaced his need for air, deluding him into believing that you were what he needed to stay alive.

You were suffocating, toxic, and destructive, and he wanted more. 

After retracting from the kiss for the nth time, you turned your head to hold Hyunjae back from continuing. You both were panting, your cunt soaking, and he stared into your eyes like a puppy awaiting their next direction.

“Good boy,” you praised, and he laughed lowly and sheepishly, dropping his head as he processed what happened and the idea of it being potentially over. 

“You’re lethal,” he breathed out.

“And you’re pitiful,” you spat. There was a playful grin on your lips, but those words ignited something within Hyunjae. He raised his head and cocked a brow at you, questioning your genuinity. 

Just minutes ago you were crying over a guy that treated you terribly, and yet here you thought you had the authority to call him weak.

Perhaps he was; he was falling deeper into your pitless trap, enticed with every movement of yours, but he knew for a fact you weren’t any better than him.

You both were sick in the head for falling for people that treated the other like shit, yet your drive, your fuel, to win over the hearts of the people you loved was so strong, and it made you two unstoppable. 

Hyunjae would punch Jiwoong all over again if he could. 

Without a second thought, Hyunjae ducked his head down and ruthlessly attached his lips to your neck, eliciting a gasp from you. He kissed your skin fervently, his fingers teasing the rim of your shorts, and your hands shifted to hold onto his shoulders for support. You found yourself tossing your head back, providing him more room to do as he pleased, that if Jiwoong were to see you with marks on your neck, then maybe he’d want you back. 

“Bold of you to call me pitiful,” he grumbled, sucking onto your neck until a blot of purple began to form.

“But it’s true, no?”

“You’re just as bad, Y/N.” He licked a stripe up your neck and over the mark, and the sensation made you cringe, disgust itching at your skin due to being covered in his saliva, but you wanted more of it. You wanted Hyunjae to treat you like you were nothing, to treat you worse than Jiwoong ever had, so you could direct your blame over to Hyunjae instead of your unknowing boyfriend.

You turned your head and slotted your lips with his again, already addicted to how perfect they were for you. Hyunjae knew the exact way to kiss you, to keep you on your toes, as your slick pooled up in your underwear at the mere thought of Hyunjae touching you.

The kiss was eager, a fight for control, and when Hyunjae didn’t surrender, you raised your knee, forcing your thigh to brush up against his crotch.

He gasped at the sensation and pulled away, bangs hanging over his eyes as he looked down at the sight. You teased him by keeping your touches gentle, but you made sure to keep your leg moving. Nothing intrigued you more than seeing Hyunjae beg or rut against your thigh, further proof of how pathetic he was for you. You gained a sense of ego knowing that he could have any girl in the world, that he has had every girl, and yet he would always come back to you. Now that you had him, it would be harder for him to return to a life without you under him, moaning his name.

You wanted to be his downfall. 

Your nails latched onto the mesh, taking note of how easy it would be to rip the material, before pressing your thigh firmly up against his dick, making him jerk.

“You’re-...oh my god, Y/N,” he gasped, breathless. His eyes meet your devious ones, how you were basically Satan himself, and somehow, someway, he wouldn’t ask for anything different. “You’re playing a losing…a losing- game.”

“What more do I have left to lose?” There was some truth in your words as vulnerability struck you. Your leg then lowered as you regained a slight sense of reality, realizing that you were forcing Hyunjae into being your selfish source of relief. You hated Hyunjae, sure, but you knew this was the last thing he deserved—to use him when he’d been nothing but accommodating to you.

And your sick and twisted plan was that after this encounter, you’d leave him to rot.

Hyunjae didn’t deserve that at all. 

But Hyunjae was already too far gone, too intoxicated, to even consider the repercussions of how he’d end up after this. The loss of contact with his crotch was what had him picking you up from his car, the tips of his fingers digging into your thighs, as he led you to the backseat. 

Your eyes widened, your senses fully back, but you made him like this, and you were going to pay for it. Although scared for about what’s to come, the anticipation had you drooling, your lips pressing fierce kisses onto his skin while he opened the door with you in his arms.

He laid you down gently and crawled over you, keeping you trapped between his arms.

“This is what you wanted, right? For me to tear you apart until you can run back to Jiwoong and justify how poorly he treats you?” 

Your brows bunched up at his words, your legs getting antsy being under him. There was no answering him, not when Hyunjae already knew how you were going to respond.

He brought one of his hands into your shorts and made the aggravating decision to slide his fingers over your underwear, depriving you of contact with his fingers.

Yet even with your underwear being a divider, he found your clit with ease and immediately started rubbing circles into the bud, making you buck your hips with a whine. The friction of the cloth was something you were unfamiliar with, and lord did it mess with you. 

“You want me to treat you how he sees you? Worthless and undeserving of respect?” He flicked your clit and kissed your jaw. “If that’s what you want, that’s exactly what my princess is going to get.”

“Fuck,” you moaned, using your hands to push onto his shoulders and force him down. The drive to ride his tongue was strong, and if he kept teasing you, you would have lost it.

“I know you inside and out, Y/N. I know you better than him, and this is how you treat me.” He sucked in a cheek but ultimately decided to comply with what you wanted. He pulled off your shorts yet left your underwear on, and his brows raised. He wasn’t sure how his fingers had missed the texture of lace, but what you were wearing was certainly lingerie.

You looked down to see why he stopped, and when you realized why he froze, heat rose to your cheeks.

“I wanted to feel pretty,” you whispered, shutting your eyes after turning your head. It was embarrassing, now that you thought about it, but Hyunjae’s heart soared, and he wanted nothing more than for you to know how ethereal you looked.

But he shoved the feeling away, allowing his frustrations to get the better half of him. 

When he pulled off your underwear, he cooed at how your essence oozed onto the material and raised the undergarment into the air, waiting for you to look.

“Did I do this?”

His mocking tone kept you from looking, but your curiosity got the best of you. You were met with the sight of a large wet, dark patch on your underwear, biting down on your lip as you looked at him with wide eyes. If you thought about it, you couldn’t remember the last time you felt like this, or if there ever had been a time when you craved someone this badly. 

He tossed it to the side and his hands massaged your thighs, keeping them spread open so he got a proper view of your core on display for him. The sight truly stunned him, reminding him that this was you he fantasized about and replicated with other girls—no one else.

“Do you normally take this long?” you rasped, tossing your head back against the seat, and Hyunjae rolled his eyes.

“I do you a favor, and this is how you treat me.”

“A favor is a stretch—”

Hyunjae plunged two fingers into your mouth, having them press firmly down against your tongue. He latched onto your jaw and pulled your head forward and up towards him, having your eyes meet his.

“Remind me, Y/N, who was begging for this?”

He dropped your head back down against the seat before you could even respond and used whatever saliva accumulated in your mouth as temporary lube, figuring that your slick would help him with stretching you out. You grunted at the impact, feeling helpless, as Hyunjae finally inserted his fingers inside of you. 

Hyunjae’s fingers were enough to have your eyes rolling, but it was the ring that he wore that stimulated you the most. You weren’t aware that he was even wearing one, yet the cold band against your raging wet heat made you whimper and desperately grasp for his hair.

“Jaehyun, please,” you begged. 

He chuckled and kept his movements slow, forcing you to fuck yourself onto his fingers weakly. When you did, he was in awe at how stunning you looked, how you seemed to be in your own world, and how you were enjoying him. By curling his fingers, a moan was pulled from your throat, making your eyes open as you looked at him. You continued to pool around his fingers, your voice weakly begging for so much more than his fingers and the cold air that brushed against your skin. 

Never had you felt more vulnerable, but Hyunjae never once made you feel like you were doing something wrong, making you cling desperately to him. You forced his face down into your crotch and jerked at the feeling of his nose brushing up against your clit.

“Shameless, aren’t you?” he commented, laughing lowly, but you were too out of it to care. 

“Shut the-...F-fuck, oh my god.”

Your whines had gotten more incessant the more useless he became, his fingers now completely stilled inside of you as he watched you roll your hips with a cheeky grin. He wanted to drag this out for as long as possible, knowing fully well that he could last all night. 

When he took out his fingers, you were yanked out of your bliss and nearly begged for him to put them back in, but before you could get a word out, he had replaced his digits with his tongue. Your slick was dripping onto his lips, and as he dragged his wet muscle up and down your folds, he made sure to collect a small puddle of you onto his tongue to eventually swallow, wanting to savor you. 

“Oh-...Oh my god, Jae—” Your orgasm was approaching, unsure of how it was here so soon, but you recognized the signs from the coil in your chest tightening to losing every sensation to the man beneath you. You rocked your hips continuously onto his tongue, and his thumb attached to your clit, making you see stars with how rapid his movements were. 

He pulled his face back and forced his fingers back into you, and the final curl was what made you reach your peak, your hips in the air as you cried out his name. 

As you came down from your high, you caught a glance of the way Hyunjae was looking at you; to him, you were otherworldly, and it was a sight he’d never forget. He wondered if Jiwoong ever saw you like this, if he ever made you feel this way, and suddenly his admiration had soured and contoured to something of darkness, rid of any empathy as he now looked at you with some form of disgust. 

“All this for me, and you still have the fucking audacity to choose him.” 

The mention of Jiwoong had your eyes wide open, tears reappearing at the mention and while being in your most vulnerable state. Your legs shook from the aftermath, feeling too weak to continue, yet Hyunjae seemed to have other plans.

Instead of shoving his fingers back into either of your mouths, he hovered over you and made sure you saw the way he dragged his fingers around your abdomen, drawing aimlessly over your skin with your essence before dragging a hand up to your breasts, massaging one of them as his other hand rested by your waist.

“Tell me, Y/N, did you buy this for him and never got to use it? That’s why you’re wearing it now with me? Am I your sloppy seconds?”

There was a slight growl under his tone, and while you shook your head subconsciously, he worked to remove your shirt, wanting a better look at your bra, before being met with a necklace you had been hiding; one with Jiwoong’s name.

And Hyunjae took no time breaking it from your neck.

Your jaw dropped, and you snapped out of your daze by sitting straight up, yet as you were about to yell at him for breaking your necklace, he shoved three fingers back into your pussy, shutting you up by having you moan at the intrusion. 

“It looked cheap, anyway,” he muttered, forcing his mouth against yours momentarily to nip on your lower lip, tugging on it so your focus remained on him. 

“That was—he’s mine,” you forced out, gasping at every thrust he made with his fingers, your sweet spot being abused as your hands latched onto his shoulders. You made sure your nails dug into his skin, wanting it to hurt, before pulling onto the mesh, wishing for it to tear. 

“He’s not yours, princess. Tell me, how can you say that when his dick has been up other girls?” With his free hand, he grabbed your face and made sure you were staring straight at him before shoving it to the side. 

“You need to fucking wake up and realize that you can dream all you want about how he’d react if he saw you hopping on my dick, but guess what? He wouldn’t care.” Hyunjae pulled out his fingers and left you alone in the backseat. 

You sat there, a wreck and vulnerable, as you tried to catch your breath. You lay back on your forearms, curious eyes following his every movement.

“There’s a reason he hasn’t left you yet,” Hyunjae explained, opening the front door to his car to grab a condom and his phone. He tucked both into his back pocket before returning to you, bringing your lips to his before continuing to talk within the kiss.

“He’s stringing you along so you can boost his ego. He knows you will always be there for him, and you allow him to use you like that?” 

You wrapped your fingers around Hyunjae’s neck, squeezing it before pushing it away to keep your distance, your frustration starting to grow.

“I’m beginning to think you’re all bark and no bite, Jaehyun,” you muttered, and with whatever strength you had left, you pushed him against the seat and got into his lap. Without hesitation, you started rocking your hips over his clothed dick, hoping your slick would seep in so he could feel you.

He hissed but allowed you to do as you pleased, his grip tight on your hips.

“I-...I think…if you asked me, you’re the one who’s projecting. I’m the one in a relationship, and you’re just a side piece.”

The speed of your hips increased, and Hyunjae felt ecstasy on the tip of his tongue, the confinements of his pants physically paining him the more you continued.

“You’re jealous, Jae. Just admit it.”

You pulled at his hair, loving the absolute control you had over him at that moment, but in one languid motion, Hyunjae managed to push you back down, this time with your stomach against the seats. You could feel your bodily fluids sticking to the nylon, and with how hard Hyunjae was pressing down into you, you were barely given a chance to move. 

With one hand on your lower back, he kept you still as he took out both his phone and condom, making sure to place both on top of your bare skin.

“What’s there to be jealous of when you’re here under me? You want to be fucked stupid? Fine. Don’t fucking complain when you want me to be the villain.” You lurched at his words, refusing to let him win, but you were completely unable to do much damage as Hyunjae kicked off his pants and boxers while still keeping his weight on you.

He then picked up his phone and pulled up the camera, making sure to take a photo of you in his car before clicking record and tossing the phone onto the ground, hoping it was close enough to pick up on your sweet noises. 

“Make sure to be loud for me, yeah? I’m sure Jiwoong would love it if I sent that video to him.”

“You wouldn’t fucking dare,” you bit back, your hand reaching out in an attempt to grab the device, but Hyunjae was quicker to grab your wrist, pinning it behind your back. 

“I wouldn’t because I know how to appreciate what’s mine.” Hyunjae released his hold on you to roll on the condom, giving you the opportunity to move and take his phone as you pleased. To your dismay, there was no more effort left within you, only an ache to feel Hyunjae inside you. 

“He appreciates me,” you mumbled, trying to convince yourself otherwise as you waited.

“Does he record you? Jerk off to your moans every night? Because I would, Y/N, just for you.” His voice was now by your ear, and when you turned your head to look at him, he pulled you into another hungry kiss, his dick now grazing against your hole. 

“You’re fucking insane,” you bit back into the kiss, and he grinned against your lips, guiding his dick into you as he spoke.

“Psychotic, just for my princess.”

Venom laced his voice, dripping menacingly, and the insertion of his tip had you grasping for something in front of you, anything, and it was only then that you were able to process how thick his cock was.

“Can you take it?” he asked, his voice slightly softer than before. When you gave him a curt nod, he continued pushing in further. Maybe lube should’ve been an option, but you were so wet for him that it didn’t matter, knowing that the stretch probably would have hurt regardless. 

“Fuck, fuck—he really doesn’t know what he’s missing,” Hyunjae gasped, his head resting against the back of yours. It was better than anything he’d dreamed of, better than any girl he imagined, because it was you, and your body was made for him.

“When was the last time he fucked you?” He was fully inside of you now, and when you didn’t answer, he decided to take it as a sign to move. With a firm grip on your waist, he pulled out just to slam back in, making you yell as you clawed at the seat, wishing there was something to bite on as you endured the pain that was quick to morph into pleasure. 

Every glide pushed you further into the car, your forearms occasionally hitting the door, as his hips moved vigorously, working up to a pace that had you moaning without pause. Tears were flowing down your cheeks at the overwhelming pleasure of being manhandled—of being Hyunjae’s rag doll when he was meant to be yours, and your body seized up, being worked up to your orgasm once more with how precise each thrust seemed to be. 

He adjusted to raise one of your legs to his hip, giving him a new angle to pound into you as he worships you with his dick, and you shook out of pleasure, whining as you saw white and reached your second orgasm for the night. You pulsated around his cock, strangled moans ripping from your throat as tears mixed with your drool by your chin.

And Hyunjae showed no signs of stopping.

He made sure to press your face down against the seats, wanting every liquid to fall and stain his car, giving him something to remember you by.

Oh, and there was the recording too.

While kneeling inside of the cramped car, he slowed his movements and inclined his torso towards you. In one swift motion, he wrapped his arm around your neck and pulled you up, locking you inside his elbow as he forced you to look into your reflection in the car window.

“Look at you, the school’s favorite slut. What happens if the recording drops? The whole school would know you’re mine, wouldn’t they?” He pressed his chest against your back, the mesh rubbing against your skin as his lips remained near your ear, forcing you to listen to every word.

You limped against him, your flames completely burnt out, and your fingers tugged onto the mesh around his arm, successfully ripping it after some time, but Hyunjae seemed unphased. In fact, it turned him on even more knowing that he had you locked in, that you were his.

“Look at your pretty cunt taking me in so well. It was so wet for me, wasn’t it? It still is. And guess what? You’re in my car. You belong to me, and my good girl is only now just finding out about it, isn’t she?” 

“I-I’m…I’m not-...not yours,” you retaliated, creating red angry marks into his skin with your nails as you endured being used, stifling your moans as you looked at how wrecked you were, how bare you seemed to be compared to Hyunjae. You were much more of a mess, from your hair to the bruises on your neck. Your pussy kept tightening up around his dick, convulsing occasionally with every hit toward your g-spot, and you held onto Hyunjae each time. 

Your head drooped down, thinking about how your heart ached for Jiwoong, yet the rest of your body was meant for Hyunjae.

“Whose fucking dick is inside of you right now?” He scoffed and pulled on your hair, forcing your head back up so he could directly speak into your ear. “Wake up, Y/N,” he demanded. “You’re mine.”

He dropped you back onto the seat like you were nothing, leaving you completely helpless, your throat void of any words as your eyes closed and met the back of your skull, too fucked out to communicate. You tried reaching for the door handle, just something to hold onto, yet you couldn’t.

“You tell me I’m pitiful, that I’m basically delusional when you’re going to be the reason my car will smell like sex for weeks.”

Your face was forced back into the puddle of liquid you created earlier, being shifted back and forth against the seat as if you were made for his dick and not vice versa.

“It’s crazy how pathetic you are, how willing you are to break yourself down in front of everyone just to have him. That-...fuck…that you’re so convinced he wants you and you two are soulmates.” He dragged his fingers through your hair and grabbed your roots. “You called me, you wanted me, and I have you right now, moaning my name, and you have nothing.”

Something about his words kept bringing out your orgasms, each thrust adding to the pleasure immensely. You didn’t know how much you could handle—afraid you may pass out from how much he was using you, from his tight grip around you to his dick hitting inside of you mercilessly.

Hyunjae whispering ‘I won, Y/N’ was what had you losing it, your high this time ending up stronger than the rest. You were fully crying now, and yet he continued as if you were nothing.

He peppered your shoulder with kisses and had the slight decency to slow his pace, but he also took note of your sobs.

“Don’t tell me you still want him,” he began rambling, his lips still on your shoulder. “Don’t tell me after this that your heart still belongs to him, because if that were the case, I’d make you call him right now. Say you wish it was him instead of me, and that he’s the love of your life while you’re stuffed with my dick. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

You could no longer think, and what you hated most was how reactive your body was—how you were just able to come for the third time, but Hyunjae’s dick solely being inside you snapped some other straw you weren’t aware you had, finding that your last high was incoming. 

Hyunjae had picked up the pace by then, and by knowing your body incredibly well, he reached down to your sensitive clit to relieve you. You both knew your fourth was arriving, and you held on tight to his arm.

“J-Jaehy- hyun, I’m—”

“Mine.”

You cried out, your entire body shaking, and Hyunjae pulled out, immediately releasing onto your back with a guttural moan after yanking off the condom. He was forced to catch his breath, watching you float in and out of consciousness.

Your eyes were closed, struggling to breathe through your sobs, and Hyunjae consoled you with a kiss on the back of your shoulder. 

“You’re mine, Y/N, whether you like it or not.”

He then pressed a kiss to your cheek before leaving to grab paper towels from his trunk. You were heaving, still shaking, and left alone as a mess in his backseat, yet with him gone, you felt even more useless, wanting him back by your side instantly. You weakly cried out for him, your nails dragging against the seat in hopes of being in his arms soon, and maybe he was right.

Maybe you were his.

OUR INFERNO [ M.LIST | TWO ]

NAVIGATION — THE BOYZ

© https://hcuyk.tumblr.com/

[koiiiji]

random nsfw headcanons

tw ; nsfw, maybe a little ooc (esp with Jonggun, but idc we need to comfort him after shiro oni arc 🤓🙂‍↕️)

starring ; Jonggun, Gongseop, Jinseong

Jonggun is a really passionate lover. as soon as he fall in love he doesn’t let it go. he is fervent and a little too persistent. as he had you in his hands in his bed don’t expect him to let you go. he is passionate and ardent during sex. his hands wander over your body, from your ribs, sliding higher, forcing you let go of blankets, interlacing his fingers with yours, making his bigger palm press your hands into mattress. he catches your every sigh, moan and squeak, giving you sloppy kisses, so a thin thread of saliva connects your mouths. Jonggun is giving you your time to adjust to his rough hands, to his harsh touches — he is not used to soft and delicate skin like yours. his hands are for distraction and fights, so he would pause when he feels you flinch under his hands. he always starts from being gentleman like this, but it always ends up with both of you being cock and pussy drunk, already over enough orgasms but you two just can’t have enough of each other! Jonggun is passionate and warm lover, but god bless you if you are just one night stand…

Gongseop not only fake monk, but also pervert monk. you and him used to know each other for quite awhile. not like your relationship was the warmest, and you never was frequent guest in his temple, you still had your things to do, but every time you happened to be in his bed things became more and more hot. just like the last time, when you saddled his hips, and your own body was moving so smoothly, like snake, searching for more friction, pursuing only your own pleasure. your hands roving over his chest, running his hair through your fingers, lightly moving up to his neck and the back of his bald head, digging your claws into his skin, and hissing softly when his own hands squeezed your firm ass too tightly. Gongseop could try to convince people that he had changed since the first generation, but you could recognize the same nasty smirk when you nipped at his bottom lip in response to his slap. you could recognize it just by his look, a little pitiful, when his lips were open, and hoarse grunts spread throughout the room, and you pulled another orgasm out of him. yes, he could convince people that he had changed, as much as he wanted, but you knew him and his body better than you would like.

who is sexually concerned? Lee Jinseong. the amount of unreleased adrenaline and arousal after his box trainings are insane. and his hormones are not playing on his side too. he is ready to fuck almost 24/7, yet he have his romantic side so he desperately trying to take his time with preparing and making out, but his cock is aching so badly and his balls are just too heavy so he needs your help as soon as possible. you understand his state right? you won’t say no to this desperate puppy, right? but don’t tease him or think he is wrapped around your finger. sure Jinseong is gentle, but during the sex, especially when he is spurred on, he won’t tolerate your brat behavior, and will turn you on your tummy just to mercilessly pound you into his bed, murmuring dirty words (he will turn red if you remind him about this in the morning)

[mymoodwriting]

15.8k, yandere, manipulation, gangs, drugs, guns, needles, sedatives, car accident, alcohol, kidnapping, knives, pills, smut, non-con, dub-con, knife play, aphrodisiac, BDSM, sex toys, fingering, dry humping, gang bang, double penetration, restraints, supernatural power (@starillusion13)

“Welcome to Wingz Express, how may I help you?”

You pulled down your hood as you walked into the shop. The gentleman behind the counter was quite handsome, and more focused on the white cat in its arms. When he looked up at you he offered a smile, standing up.

“What can I do for you?”

“Uh… hi… I was wondering… how much could you give me for this necklace?”

You pulled your fist out of your pocket, holding it out and opening your hand to reveal a small gold necklace. The gentleman asked for your permission to take it and then proceeded to do so. He examined it for a moment up against the light and then handed it back to you, checking under the counter display case for something.

“So, tell me, why’s a pretty thing like you selling something so pretty.”

“I just need the money…”

“What for?”

“Nothing bad!” You quickly remarked. “Just for school… I need new books for the semester and… I don’t really have any other options.”

“I see.”

The gentleman got out a scale, turning it on and testing it out with a few other jewelry pieces. As he did that the door opened, a bell ringing to signify there was someone new entering the shop. You looked over to see another guy with a cap walk in, and before the shop worker could say their greeting he spoke.

“I’m back.”

“Welcome back, Hyunjae.”

“Oh, what do we have here?”

This Hyunjae gave you a smile before going behind the counter with the other, looking around for the item in question. Although you still had it.

“May I?”

The other held his hand out to you, and you handed over the necklace. He put it on the scale and noted down its weight. From there Hyunjae grabbed it and began examining it.

“So, how much are you looking to get?” The worker asked.

“Juyeon-”

“I’m not talking to you right now, Hyunjae.” Juyeon cleared his throat and smiled at you. “How much do you need?”

“Uh… if I could get a few hundred… that would be fine… although I don’t think the necklace is worth that much…”

“Well you’re in luck.” Juyeon grabbed the necklace, holding it up. “The craftsman ship on this is quite unique, the weight is decent, and it seems to be 14k, so I can give you about six hundred dollars.”

“Six… six hundred?”

“Too little?”

“I… no… if that’s what it’s worth… I had no idea…”

“Whoever gave this to you must have really cared for you.”

“I guess… it’s the only thing I have from my birth parents… before they passed away…”

“Oh, something with this much sentimental value… are you sure you want to-”

“I need the money for school… it’s okay…”

“If you say so.”

Juyeon grabbed a sheet of paper and pen, sliding it over to you. He asked for you to fill out your personal information, as they needed physical records of all transactions. He stepped away for a moment to get the money, counting it in front of you so you’d have no doubts. As he handed it over to you he kept his grip on it, confusing you. He reached into his jacket pocket and held out a business card for you, which you hesitantly took.

“What’s this?”

“If you need money, it might be better to get a job. We also run a delivery service and are always looking for new people.” Juyeon let go of the money. “Just a thought.”

“Thank you…”

You politely bowed your head and made your way out of the shop. Juyeon watched you every step of the way until you were out of sight. When he looked back he was met with Hyunjae’s death glare.

“What?”

“Six hundred dollars? Seriously? How much is that necklace actually worth?”

“About a hundred.”

“Juyeon!”

“What!”

“Sangyeon is going to kill you.”

“He can try.” Juyeon looked down at the paperwork. “Let me know when she calls.”

“You mean if she calls.”

“When.” Juyeon corrected. “She’ll call.”

“And how can you be so sure?”

“Cause I’m gonna make her mine.”

❤ 

You went to the shop early in the morning the day before classes started. You made it back to your dorm, ignoring the boxes you needed to unpack and just collapsing onto the bed. You were grateful you had gotten some money, hoping it’d be enough for books. Your stomach growled and you could only whine. You had two meal passes per day, and you’d rather save those for lunch and dinner. For a moment you thought to spend some of the money you had on breakfast, but you quickly shot the idea down reminding yourself you had to save every penny. After some more lounging around you heard your roommate come in, reminding you that you needed to unpack and get ready for the semester.

After the first week you had all necessary materials, and a few bucks left over. You kinda wanted to treat yourself, but you knew you shouldn’t be spending so recklessly. You’d spend your time in the library, working on assignments, or in your dorm. Even though you wanted to go out, even when classmates invited you, the only option you had was to stay in your dorm. It sucked, but you were used to it by now. Especially the morning hunger pains. Which were way worse after pulling an all nighter. 

You laid in bed the next morning, telling yourself you had to get up. You went about your morning routine, getting your things and when you put your phone in your pocket found a business card. For a moment you questioned it, but seeing the name on it reminded you where you had gotten in. The shop worker told you it would be best to get a job, and that they were hiring. You weren’t sure if you’d be able to do it though, considering you’ve seen a lot of delivery workers dropping off big heavy boxes. Not to mention the fact your schedule was all over the place. 

Then again you could do late evenings but you’d sacrifice sleep in the process. You groaned as you debated this, unsure what to do. In your current situation you were just getting by, staying at a constant with no real movement upwards. You were okay, but you could be better. Some money in your pocket would probably make you feel less anxious. Since you still had time before your morning class you decided to call on your way over, hoping to get some information and go from there. 

“Hello, Wingz Express, how may I help you?”

“Hi… I was calling to ask about your open positions.”

“Open positions?”

“Yes. One of your employees from the shop gave me a card, I believe his name was Juyeon. He told me you were hiring.”

“Ah, yes. So, what do you want to know?”

“Well, I was curious about the pay? Does it depend on the department or-”

“Thirty.”

“…” You stopped in your tracks. “Thirty… what?”

“All the work is basically the same, so I’d be paying you thirty an hour.”

“Thirty… an hour?”

“Is that not enough?”

“No! I mean, that’s great. Although, I’m a uni student so I could only really work late in the evening.”

“That’s fine. A delivery service is available 24/7 so that’s no problem. When can you start?”

“… just like that? No interview or background check.”

“It’s a delivery job, don’t need much, just you.”

“Oh… okay then…”

“You think you could come by later today? I know where I could put you.”

“Yeah, yeah I can do that. Does seven sound good?”

“Works for me. Can I get your name?”

“Y/n.”

“I’m Sangyeon, the owner. I’ll text you the address for the warehouse and when you come over ask for me.”

“Got it. Thank you.”

“I’ll see you later.”

When the call ended you found yourself staring at your phone. You easily got a job, and it paid very well. For a moment your heart fluttered with joy but then you thought about it. If it paid this much, and they were hiring, there had to be something wrong with the job. That killed your mood a bit but you told yourself it wouldn’t hurt to check it out. Besides, they were expecting you now so it would be rude not to show up. You put it all to the side for now focusing on your classes. You had an early lunch before catching a bus and heading to the warehouse. It seemed pretty empty, so you began to worry you were in the wrong place, but you saw some trucks with the Wingz Express stamp on it in the loading dock, giving you some reassurance.

You then saw a few people walking inside the building. You called out to them, but they didn’t seem to hear you so you followed them inside. It looked how you’d imagine a delivery service would have their warehouse stocked, rows and rows of items going up to the ceiling. Still, you didn’t see many workers around. You were starting to think this place was fairly new, it would explain why the pay was so high, they needed people. You cautiously walked around, looking for another employee, but it wouldn’t be long before you were called out.

“Ya! Stop right there!”

You turned around to see these two gentlemen walking over to you, concern on their faces. You merely offered a smile, trying not to be nervous.

“Hello.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m the new hire.”

“New hire? Seriously?”

“Uh, yes. I spoke with the owner on the phone and he-”

“Sure you did. Look, you seem nice, so why don’t we escort you out.”

“What?”

“We have no problem dragging you out if necessary.”

“But-”

“Guys!” A third voice boomed. “What is going on?”

“This girl says she works here. That she spoke with you on the phone.”

“I did speak with someone.”

You looked back to see who you believed to be Sangyeon approach. He came up to you with a smile and held his hand out to you.

“You must be y/n, it’s a pleasure to meet you in person, I’m Sangyeon.”

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you too.”

“I’m glad you found the place, now let’s go to the office and get all the paperwork sorted.”

“Wait, why didn’t you tell us that-”

“It’s fine. Just get back to work you two.”

You followed Sangyeon to the office at the back of the warehouse. He brought out some papers for you to fill out, getting you a hat and vest as well. Afterwards he showed you around the warehouse, telling you about the company. They had been around for a while and as you suspected, only recently set up a location in this area. They pretty much delivered everything to anyone, so their services were sought after.

“I don’t expect heavy manual labor from you, so I’ll be partnering you up with Younghoon.”

You went over to the docks, Sangyeon introducing you to your new partner. He was happy to meet you, giving you a big smile as he shook your hand.

“Welcome to the team.”

“Thanks.”

“I expect you to take good care of her.” Sangyeon commented. “And show her the ropes.”

“Of course.”

“Alright, be safe, and let me know if anything happens. See you both later.”

Younghoon closed up the truck and playfully offered you the keys, but said you didn’t know where to go yet. You also mentioned you didn’t know how to drive which he assured you wasn’t an issue as no one really did deliveries alone.

“So, what’s up with you?”

“Huh?”

“Sorry, I worded that weirdly. Tell me about yourself. What do you do with your time, why the job?”

“Oh… well I’m a university student, and I need the money for my expenses… and to pay back my loans someday.”

“Your parents won’t help out?”

“I don’t have any…”

“Oh, my bad.”

“It’s alright. I was in foster care and did grow up in a nice home, it’s just… different…”

“You still live with your foster parents?”

“No, no, I live on campus in the dormitories. It feels more like my home that way.”

“Look at you, miss independent.”

You giggled. “I try.”

“Well, getting a job is a good step.”

“Thanks.”

You arrived at an apartment complex, going with Younghoon to get the delivery items. You had multiple deliveries in the building, and it would go faster with two people. Younghoon pulled out a small cart, handing you these paper bags with numbers on them. He got another cart and did the same, the two of you taking one and making your way inside the building. He gave you a list, and certain floors to attend to, as well as a walkie to keep in touch with, telling you the numbers on the bags corresponded with apartment numbers. You just had to place the bag in front of the right door and take a picture of it, followed by ringing the doorbell and moving onto the next. Pretty simple.

You did this with a few other apartment complexes, returning to the warehouse in the early hours of the morning. To your surprise you could hear music and cheering coming from inside. Younghoon seemed to know exactly what was going on and had you follow him. You saw a bunch of boys gathered around two others in forklifts, they were gonna race. Sangyeon noticed the two of you and came over. Younghoon told him everything had gone well and all deliveries were made. He was happy to hear, asking you how you felt with the work. It was good, and you were glad to help.

“You should stick around for the race.”

“I don’t think I should.”

“It’ll be fun. You can place your bet too.”

“I don’t really have money to bet…”

“Then how about this.” Younghoon suggested. “You bet an hours pay, and if you win, your paycheck gets doubled. You should have some fun with us too.”

“Uh…”

“It’s not much to lose.”

“Sure. I’ll play.”

If you were gonna keep this job, you should make an effort to get along with your coworkers. You joined in the crowd, going over to the front, and being told who the racers were. One was a gentleman by the name of Sunwoo, and the other Chanhee. You didn’t have much to go by so this was truly a gamble for you. In the end you put your money on Chanhee, and then the race began. The gentleman from the shop, Hyunjae, went up to start the race, doing a count down and dropping the flag. It was easy to get caught up in the energy as you watch the two go around the warehouse, and you were overjoyed when Chanhee crossed the finish line first. You screamed in joy and jumped into Younghoon’s arms. He spun you around until you came back to your senses and apologized.

“Congrats to you.”

“Sorry, I didn’t…”

“It’s okay, you were excited.”

“Y/n.” Sangyeon called. “Let’s get you your money, follow me.”

You went with Sangyeon to the office. He gave you a check for your first shift, and your earnings from the bet in cash. You kept yourself together as best you could, but it was hard to hide your joy.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See you then.”

You returned to your dorm, tired but satisfied. A bit of a burden had been lifted off your shoulders. You cleaned up and went to bed. Even though you wouldn’t get much sleep you had the peace of mind that everything would be alright. In the morning you even treated yourself to a yummy breakfast before class. You went about your day with a slight skip in your step, and happily returned to the warehouse in the evening. While you made your way to the office you heard a honk and one of the forklifts came over to your side. You recognized the driver.

“Hello, I don’t think we got to properly meet last night.”

“Hi, I’m y/n, a new hire.”

“I’m Chanhee, your lucky charm.” He chuckled. “You made the right choice last night.”

“Thanks for winning.”

“It’s all skill. We should hang out sometime outside of work.”

“If I have the time.”

“Then keep me in your thoughts.”

“Y/n!” You heard Younghoon call. “You ready?”

“Coming! I’ll see you around, Chanhee.”

“Don’t be a stranger.”

Chanhee went off and you went over to Younghoon, going off to work. For the next few days it was the same routine. You went to the same places, and did the same job. Since it was late in the evening going into the morning, you rarely ran into people, although it did happen on occasion. These people usually just said hello, and moved on, but on one occasion things were different. Someone approached you, asking about their order. You were happy to help, and asked for their apartment number. You didn’t have anything on your list, so you used your walkie to call Younghoon and ask him about the situation. He had no record of such an order either.

“Sorry, we don’t seem to have your order. Perhaps you could-”

“Just give me one of the ones you have.”

“I’m afraid I can’t do that. These are for other people. And-”

“Whatever.”

The person just grabbed a random bag off your cart, and you quickly reached out to grab it as well. You were trying to explain this wasn’t for them, but the other party was not letting go. Eventually the struggle caused the bag to rip, multiple items falling to the floor, and a white powder exploding onto you. The other person immediately dropped the bag and ran, causing you to collapse to the floor. You were upset and as you got up Younghoon came to your side, helping you to your feet.

“Are you okay?”

“I guess. Sorry, one of the orders-”

“It’s fine.” Younghoon tried to dust you off. “There’s a small vacuum in the back of the van, why don’t you go get it and I’ll do some cleaning here.”

“Of course.”

You went down to the van and retrieved the vacuum returning to Younghoon as he got off the phone. He thanked you and got to work cleaning up, telling you they liked to operate like ghosts, not leaving a trace behind. He also told you not to worry about the order that was damaged, Sangyeon was already taking care of it. You continued with the deliveries together, although after a while you began to feel dizzy. You thought you were fine but your legs suddenly gave out. Younghoon was quick to catch you, holding you in his arms.

“Y/n? Y/n, can you hear me?”

You felt strange, as if you were floating on water. Younghoon’s voice sounded so distant, but you were trying to listen. All you could give him was a smile before your body gave out and everything faded to black.

❤ 

Your head was throbbing as you regained consciousness. It took a moment to register where you were, but as you sat up you could see that you were in the office back at the warehouse. You were relieved to be somewhere familiar, although you were alone. Besides the headache you felt fine, and when you checked the time you saw that your shift had ended half an hour ago. You felt terrible for what had happened, but at least it wasn’t bad enough that you needed to be taken to the hospital. It was getting late and you needed to return to your dorm, but you also wanted to check in with Sangyeon to apologize.

You grabbed your things and stepped out of the office, looking around the warehouse. The place was eerily quiet, yet you called out to see if anyone was there. As far as you knew the warehouse never really closed, so someone had to be around. While wandering around you noticed just how many boxes were stacked in the warehouse. You had never really looked into the type of things Wingz Express delivered, and after today’s incident you were quite curious. The boxes were labeled according to what they had, but you noticed the boxes higher up didn’t have a label at all. 

“You should be careful.”

You jumped when you heard a voice, looking over to see Chanhee up on some boxes looking down at you. If he had been there this whole time then he surely had heard you calling for someone, but just ignored you until now. He chuckled and apologized for startling you, hoping down.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better, sorry for what happened.”

“It wasn’t your fault, you were just doing your job.”

“Yeah… so what is it that you guys deliver? What have I been delivering?”

“No idea, big boss Sangyeon takes care of all that. We deliver anything and everything, so who knows, not really our business.”

“I see. I should get going.”

“Right, you have class in the morning. I’ll show you out.”

“I was actually looking for Sangyeon.”

“He’s busy with something, but I’ll let him know you’re alright.”

“Okay, thanks.”

You made it back to your dorm in one piece, feeling a mix of exhaustion and annoyance. People just had to be so dumb and you were sure you’d get a pay cut for passing out on the job. For now though you just needed to sleep and worry about your classes. In the morning you still felt tired, but you had to get on with your day. Although as you were on your way to class you got a call from Sangyeon.

“Hey, how are you feeling?”

“I’m alright. I do need to apologize for last night.”

“There’s no need. All that matters is that you’re alright. If you need anything, you let me know.”

“I will, thank you.”

“Since I have you on the line, could I ask something of you?”

“What is it?”

“I know you don’t usually work weekends, but if you ever have the time you’re always welcome to come by. I could use the help in the mornings and I’d pay you extra too. Which reminds me, I am paying you for your full hours for yesterday.”

“Oh you don’t-”

“I insist. You got hurt on the job and I need to take care of you. I know it’s early so I’ll let you go, but if you can come in this weekend please let me know.”

“Yeah, yeah I will, thanks Sangyeon.”

“Have a good day.”

“You too.”

❤ 

The weekends were normally your days off. You’d use them to catch up on assignments, or sleep, and maybe treat yourself since you had money to spend. Although you didn’t really have friends to hang out with. At least if you went into work you wouldn’t be alone, and you’d get some more money. So you decided to make your way over to the warehouse, greeted by happy faces.

“I’m glad you could spare the time.” Sangyeon commented.

“No problem. So, where’s Younghoon?”

“You won’t be with him today. I’m gonna have you help Kevin out. Nothing too crazy.”

“Sure. That sounds like fun.”

“I’ll take you to him.”

You followed Sangyeon through the warehouse, going back over to the loading docks. He brought you over to Kevin and introduced you.

“Pleasure to be working with you.”

“Same here.”

“Take care of her.” Sangyeon mentioned.

“I got it, boss.”

“Then I’ll leave you to it. Let me know if anything happens.”

“Will do.” Kevin playfully saluted. “So, I know you’re used to working the evening shift, but I promise the day shift isn’t too bad.”

“I guess we’ll see.”

“Truck’s already loaded so let’s go.”

You made small talk with Kevin on the drive, and the job was fairly similar. You were dropping off boxes to apartment buildings or stores. If there was no one to receive it then you set it down, take a picture, and send a message, just like before. The only real difference was politely greeting people around you. The uniform was simple too, which meant it was easy for people to recognize you.

“Y/n?”

“Hm?”

While heading back to the truck you were stopped by a group of girls, recognizing them from one of your classes. You weren’t exactly friends, but you knew each other to be more than strangers.

“What are you doing?”

“Just… working… I need some extra money so I thought I’d pick up a few shifts.”

“That explains a lot.”

“Huh?”

“Y/n.”

You looked back just as Kevin approached you, seeming out of breath. He placed an arm around your shoulder, pulling you close.

“This was our last stop, so we can go.” Kevin smiled and looked over at the girls. “Ladies, if you’ll excuse us.”

“What’s your name?”

“Sorry, I’m not that easy.”

Kevin pulled you along back to the truck. The other girls followed you for a bit, but Kevin didn’t pay them any attention. As you were on the road heading back to the warehouse your phone started pinning. The girls had your number from previous projects and were asking you about Kevin. Before you could even attempt to answer them Kevin snatched your phone.

“Ya.”

“I thought you were keeping me company.”

“Right, sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize.” Kevin said. “Thanks for today, you were a big help.”

“No problem.”

“You got any plans for later?”

“No, not really. Why?”

“We’re having a party tonight down at our favorite spot. You should come.”

“You mean a club?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t really have an outfit for that.”

“Just wear something nice. You should come. Have a few drinks and relax, I’m sure uni must be stressful.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Would love to see you, consider it a work get together. You’d be able to meet everyone.”

“Uh… sure… there’s no harm.”

“Awesome. I’ll text you the details.”

Like you said, you didn’t have an outfit for the club scene, but found something nice. You were a bit nervous, but to your surprise the bouncer let you in without issue. As you stepped inside you could feel the music shaking everything. The lights were low and people were dancing and drinking in every direction. You glanced down at your phone, sending Kevin a message that you were here. While walking around you wound up running into your classmates from before.

“Y/n? Surprised to see you here, it’s not really your scene.”

“I… I know… it’s a work thing…”

“Oh, then maybe we can join you.”

“I’m not sure if you could.”

Despite the crowd you managed to see a familiar face, Chanhee, excusing yourself and trying to follow after them. You called their name, but you can’t hear much besides the music. Although you stopped when you came across two bouncers, realizing Chanhee had gone into a VIP section.

“Hello, I’m here with my friends and I saw one of them just went through here.”

“Yeah, I didn’t know we were doing VIP tonight.”

Your classmates had followed you and come up from behind, trying to sweet talk the bouncers. You weren’t exactly with them, but if they could help you get in then maybe it wasn’t a bad thing. Although you noticed another familiar face and called out to them.

“Kevin!”

“Y/n, glad you could make it.”

Kevin came over and told the bouncers to let you in, although your classmates weren’t allowed. They started pleading with you, but you weren’t sure what to say.

“Are these your friends y/n?” Kevin asked. “And be honest.”

“Uh… well… not really… we’re just classmates.”

“I see, well, ladies, I’m afraid VIP is invite only, have a nice night.”

Kevin wrapped an arm around your shoulder and led you deeper into the VIP section. You were brought over to a private area, seeing many more familiar faces. You got a simple drink from the bar there, mingling with your coworkers and meeting new people. Although some were definitely old faces.

“Y/n! Oh my gosh, it’s so good to see you.”

“Juyeon?”

“Yeah, how’ve you been? How’s the job?”

“It’s good, and the money has been a great help.”

“See, told ya it would work out.”

“Thanks again for the introduction.”

“My pleasure.”

You danced the night away, having a few drinks too. Not enough to be drunk, but you were a bit tipsy. Come morning things were winding down, and you definitely needed rest. Some of the boys offered you a ride back to the dorm, which you gladly accepted. They didn’t all drink as some were the designated drivers of the night. You cozied up in the back of a car, squished between Sunwoo and Eric, while Hyunjae took the passenger seat and Jacob sat behind the wheel. The drive was smooth, Eric having his face pressed against the glass while you leaned against his shoulder. You were half asleep and couldn’t really make out the voices around you.

“She’s so cute…” Hyunjae mumbled, looking at you through the rearview mirror. “Can we keep her? I know tonight-”

“You already know the answer to that.” Jacob interrupted. “We can’t just keep an innocent person around.”

“Yeah, yeah…”

The peaceful ride was suddenly interrupted as you were sent spinning, another vehicle crashing into yours. The car came to a stop when it crashed against the side of the building. All the windows were smashed and you had cuts from broken glass. You groaned as you looked around, seeing that the others were conscious too. Sunwoo was in your field of vision, talking to you, but you couldn’t really hear anything. Next thing you knew the door behind him was yanked open and he was dragged out. Then someone reached in and pulled you out of the wreck. You were laid on the ground, vaguely making out Haknyeon before passing out.

❤ 

You expected to wake up in the hospital, or maybe even in an ambulance. Instead you found yourself in the office back at the warehouse. You felt a few aches around your body, and your cuts stung, but you were fine overall. You slowly sat up, Juyeon and Sangyeon both there to tell you to take it easy.

“What… what happened?”

“Minor car accident.” Juyeon explained. “No one was seriously injured.”

“Shouldn’t we go to the hospital?”

“We’re fine.” Sangyeon assured. “But if you feel like-”

“No, no, I’m fine.”

“Glad to hear. Apologies though, we were supposed to take you back to the dorm, but we needed to make sure you were alright first.”

“I understand, thanks.”

“Why don’t you rest for a bit and then we’ll take you home.”

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

Juyeon got up and got you a glass of water. You thanked him and laid down, feeling like a good nap would do you well as you still felt kinda dizzy and tipsy. Juyeon gave you a blanket and tucked you in on the couch, saying he’d come by later to get you and take you back to your dorm. You thanked him and closed your eyes, getting some sleep. You were out for a while before you opened your eyes again, feeling more clear headed. You found yourself alone in the office, figuring you might as well go look for Juyeon or one of the others. You found your things and headed into the warehouse.

You called out to the guys, but got no answer. Before you could try again you heard some noises and followed them. You saw the boys gathered around, laughing and smiling. You were about to make your presence known when you saw Chanhee hold up a gun and cock it. Your eyes went wide, seeing he wasn’t the only one with a weapon. You took a closer look at what the boys were doing. Besides weapons you saw needles, jewelry, and other types of contraband. It was clear you needed to leave on your own, and quietly. You took a step back and wound up knocking something over and making noise. You cursed under your breath, intending to run off only to bump into Kevin. He had an amused smile on his face, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“Look who’s awake.”

“Ha… hi…”

“We were just gonna go get you.”

“Right… I would like to go back to-”

“What’s this?”

The others had come to see what the noise was, finding you with Kevin. You offered the boys a smile, but it was hard to act normal when you saw some of them holding guns.

“Hey… I… I was looking for someone… I need to get back to the dorm…”

“Juyeon.” Sangyeon sighed. “You were supposed to give her a laced glass of water.”

“I swear I thought I did.”

“Well clearly you didn’t.”

“Wa… what do you mean…” You nervously laughed. “I’m fine, and I’d really like to go-”

“I guess we get to keep her after all, Hyunjae.” Jacob commented. “Lucky us.”

“Yes!”

“Huh?”

“Grab her.”

Since Kevin was the closest to you he immediately grabbed your arm which caused you to act. You tried to run and free yourself from his grasp but his grip was tight. Then Younghoon came over and grabbed your other arm, the two of them keeping you from escaping.

“What are you doing! Let go!”

“We can’t do that.” Younghoon said. “Sorry.”

“What about the mission tonight?” Sunwoo asked. “Are we going to postpone?”

“No, it will proceed as intended.” Sangyeon stated. “Those bastards aren’t gonna get away with a stunt like that. And we also need to send a message.”

“Then what do we do about y/n?”

“We’ll keep her here until we get back. Put her in the cage for now.”

“What is that!?” You screamed. “Please, just… just let me go! I won’t tell anyone anything! I swear!”

“We should have made her drink more.” Chanhee said. “Things wouldn’t have gotten so complicated.”

“Probably. Now let’s move.”

You tried to argue some more but the boys just dragged you along effortlessly. You were taken further into the warehouse, coming over to the sortation area. You weren’t sure what this cage was, but you were a bit relieved when you saw it. In order to transport packages around there was this cage on wheels to make sure they were safe. Usually it was stacked high with packages but this time you would be put inside. It was hard to fight back as they locked you in. You expected them to use some sort of lock but instead you watched in disbelief as Kevin bent the metal together. He gave you a smirk and a wink.

“We’ll be back later. So stay put.”

You couldn’t resist the urge to try and break yourself free but the door wouldn’t budge at all. Your mind was still processing what had happened, but the proof was right in front of you. There was no way someone was physically strong enough to bend metal the way Kevin just did, but you were living in that reality. You screamed at them to let you out, but none listened and just walked away, leaving you trapped and completely alone. You kept trying to free yourself for a while, but eventually you exhausted yourself. You collapsed and sat in the cage, contemplating your next move.

These guys were something else, and you didn’t know them at all. Now you were their prisoner, and you were certain they wouldn’t easily let you go. Since it was quiet and you were settling down from everything that had happened, exhaustion was catching up to you. Without really meaning to you wound up falling asleep. You didn’t know for how long you were out, but you woke to the rattling of the cage. You jumped awake and quickly scrambled against a corner, seeing Chanhee grabbing onto the cage and giggling.

“You look good in there.”

“Let me out!”

“Sure, but no running away, okay?”

“Whatever.”

Chanhee bent the metal back, allowing for the doors to be opened. You didn’t bother thinking about his insane feat of strength, but you were certainly surprised to see him holding his hand out to you. Reluctantly you took it, finally being able to stretch properly. You didn’t see anyone else around, so this was your chance. You offered Chanhee a smile before shoving him away from you and running in the opposite direction. Unfortunately you didn’t make it far as you crashed into Haknyeon, who you swear wasn’t there a second ago, and fell to the floor. You glanced back to see that Chanhee was still standing by the cage. Your shove really hadn’t thrown him off balance at all.

“What did I say?” Chanhee teased. “No running away. It’s pointless either way.”

“Please just let me go…” 

“We’re going home now, so don’t worry.”

“Really?”

“Of course.”

Haknyeon helped you to your feet, distracting you as Chanhee came up from behind and jammed a needle into your neck, emptying out its contents into you. Your eyes went wide, and Haknyeon held you still. Once the needle was removed you began to feel a bit dizzy, your legs losing strength. You could vaguely make out the smile on Haknyeon’s face as he lifted you up into his arms, carrying you bridal style. You tried to speak, to stay awake, but it wasn’t long before the darkness swallowed you.

“Let’s go home.”

❤ 

When you regained consciousness you felt a bit sore, but as soon as you had your head on straight your focus was on figuring out what happened and where you were. Unfortunately you couldn’t see much as your surroundings were pitch black. Not to mention your hands and legs were tied together, leaving you with a limited ability to move. So you carefully began to wiggle around, bumping into some boxes. Despite being close to the object, you couldn’t actually see it unless you got really close. Although this didn’t help you much as you had no means of freeing yourself.

A moment later you shake as the ground beneath you begins to move, and you hear the loud roar of a trailer. You were in the back of a truck and being moved to some unknown location. You tried to move around, screaming for help, but you eventually exhausted yourself, deciding to just wait and see what happened next. Since you had no concept of time in that darkness you had no idea for how long you were in there. There wasn’t even a point in trying to remember what turns were made. Eventually you came to a stop and heard the engine turn off. You were left to wonder if you had reached your final destination or if this was just a quick stop.

You heard the sounds of something unlatching, and then you were blinded by a bright light. You lifted up your arms to shield your eyes, taking a moment to adjust. As you suspected you were in the back of a trailer, and there were a bunch of boxes and other pieces of furniture around you. Being able to see it all now, this seemed like a moving truck. You heard voices and saw some of the boys climbing into the truck and grabbing boxes. Although before you could say something Jacob came up to you and tied a gag around your mouth. You began to squirm, but you were powerless in your restraints.

He got you up, getting help from Kevin as they moved you towards the end of the trailer, intending to unload you like the rest of the cargo onboard. You remained restrained as you got out of the trailer, being left with Younghoon for a moment. When you tried to get the gag off he grabbed the rope that bound your hands together, using that as a means to keep you leashed. You looked around, noticing the huge house. They had brought you to their place. All around you could see trees and a long driveway leading out to what you assumed was the main road. As far as you knew this place was in the middle of nowhere.

Younghoon suddenly pulled on your ropes, and the next thing you knew he had you over his shoulder. You squirmed and hit his back, but he seemed completely unphased. You weren’t super light, but even then he was carrying you so effortlessly. You were taken into the house, the others giving you smiles but not saying anything to you. Given the truck and all the items, you thought they were moving in, but upon entering the house you could see it was clearly lived in. This was their home. You were set down on the couch, Younghoon pulling out a knife and setting you free. He reached up and took your gag off as well.

“Welcome home.”

“What the hell is wrong with you guys…”

Younghoon chuckled. “Nothing, why?”

“You-”

“Here.” Juyeon came over with a case. “Before you do anything else.”

Younghoon took the case from the other, opening it up and revealing what looked to be a small dog collar. You immediately thought that was going around your neck, but Younghoon grabbed your leg, taking your shoe off and slipping the collar onto your leg. When you tried to pull away he just held on tighter, really unbothered by your actions. He tightened it around your ankle, and then you heard something click. You noticed a green light emitting from the device, realizing it was some sort of ankle brace, and he just placed you under house arrest.

“What the hell!”

“Don’t want you running off now.” Juyeon smiled. “Don’t worry, it won’t hurt you or anything.”

“I’m a prisoner in this house!?”

“You don’t have to think of it that way. This place is yours, and that’s just a precaution.”

“I want to go home!”

“We are home.”

“This place isn’t home.”

“I suppose you just have to give it a chance.”

“Fuck you!”

You got up and stormed off, just walking in any direction just to get away from them. No one tried to stop you, probably since you weren’t actually walking towards the door but further into the house. That wasn’t your intention, but at least none of them followed you. After walking a bit you went into the first open door you found. You closed the door behind you, leaning against it and taking a breath. This whole situation was insane, but they were acting so normal, or as normal as kidnapping someone could be. Now you were who knows where in a foreign house with no escape in sight.

You slid down to the floor, feeling defeated. You didn’t even understand how you wound up in this situation. You were just working for their stupid company and saw something you weren’t supposed to. Then again you were probably lucky to be alive. Most people who learn someone else’s secrets wind up dead, but this wasn’t exactly better either. You didn’t have your phone or any means to communicate with the world beyond this house. So in a sense you were dead to the world. You got up and found a window, staring out at the sky and then looking down at your foot with the ankle brace. 

You took a moment to further examine it, but you didn’t see any way to get it off. You really were trapped in this house. You sat back down on the floor, hugging your knees to your chest. You just wanted to go back to campus, go back to classes and be a normal person again. Your situation seemed hopeless, making you tear up, but you had to remind yourself this wasn’t the end. Surely there was a way out, and you were certain you could find it. If you gave up now, then you definitely wouldn’t get out. You took a moment to pull yourself together. This place was huge, but maybe you could find something to use to your advantage.

This would be a process, but you also didn’t intend to be friendly. For the following days you kept to yourself, not speaking to any of the boys, and avoiding them outside of meals. They tried to make conversation and engage with you, but when they saw you were unresponsive they left you alone. You didn’t expect them to just let you be, but you were still glad they did. You were allowed to explore the house as you pleased, discovering all kinds of things. They seemed to have huge collections of expensive and luxurious items. It made sense to have all these things as they did run a pawn shop and delivery service. They had access to so many things.

In that same vein, remembering the weapons, a handful of these items were probably stolen or acquired by illegal means. Seeing all these priceless items made you realize you were practically a living trophy in this house. Another prize they had won, or more accurately taken. It made you feel a bit sick, but you had yet to find something of use. Most doors around the house were open, so you could go where you pleased. Even the boys’ rooms were all open to you, but you already searched them. The room you had given was plain and empty. They told you that you could decorate it however you wanted, but you weren’t planning on setting roots here.

Only a handful of doors were locked and off limits, so you were extra curious about those. By now you had a good idea which rooms you couldn’t get into, so you’d always try to open them throughout the day, hoping to maybe catch one open. It took a bit, but you eventually got lucky. You quickly looked around to make sure you were alone, then slowly opened the door. You quietly listened, trying to figure out if anyone was inside, but it seemed to be your lucky day. You stepped in and didn’t even think to close the door as you realized what was in here. All types of weapons surrounded you. So many guns and blades hanging on the wall, a few things locked behind a cage, but this was what you had been looking for.

Surely something here could help you escape. Although before you could take another step you felt something cold against your neck. You were no longer alone. While you were distracted by your own thoughts someone noticed the open door and found you standing in one of their secret rooms. Of course it was only logical to assume you were an intruder and treat you as such. You swallowed nervously as you realized the object against your throat was a knife. You carefully looked over, seeing Eric gazing at you with a bright glint in his eyes and a cocky smirk. He only pressed the blade further against your flesh.

“Look what I have here. How did you get in here?”

“… the door was open…”

“You expect me to believe that?”

“… you… you think I picked the lock?”

“Hm, I suppose that’s true. So, what do you think?”

“… ah… about what?”

“This room. You must be terrified seeing all this, or perhaps excited. Although I’ll let you know right now, you’re out of luck.”

“I-”

“You better watch it.” Eric growled. “You wouldn’t want to get hurt.”

Eric chuckled and moved the knife away from your throat, although he merely had it ghost over your chest before moving it up to your face, dragging the dull end along your cheek.

“Don’t worry, I won’t hurt you.”

“…”

“In fact, I really want to do the opposite.”

“… huh…?”

Before you could really process what Eric was talking about he leaned in close and pressed his lips to yours. You tried to move away, but he followed, and ultimately pinned you against a wall. The knife clattered to the floor and he pinned your arms to the wall as well. He only pulled away from you when he needed to catch his breath. A big smile adorned Eric’s face as he pressed his head against yours.

“I’ve been waiting to do that.”

“… why…”

“That’s your question?” Eric chuckled. “You are interesting, but don’t you think the answer is obvious.”

“… is it?”

“Why do you think we went through all the trouble to bring you here, hm?”

“Cause I saw too much…”

“You mean all of this? No, no, if we cared for that you’d be dead.”

“Then…”

“Is it really that hard? I guess I should show you.”

“Wat-”

Eric shoved you to the floor, and soon enough he was on top of you, kissing you once more. His hands were at your hips, one slipping under your shirt, making you shiver from the skin to skin contact. Soon enough his lips were against your throat, sucking and nibbling on the skin, starting to mark you up. You squirmed beneath his touch, your hands above your head, moving about when you felt something against your fingers. It was the blade Eric had dropped. You cautiously reached for it, getting a grip on the handle. Just as you were about to make a move Eric’s hand quickly pinned down your wrist, a low chuckle escaping his lips.

“Did you really think that would work?”

Eric placed a chaste kiss against your cheek, keeping your wrist pinned and reaching over with his other hand to take the blade from you. He remained on top of you, using his body weight to keep you pinned. He twirled the knife in his hands, looking down at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“You know, we want to give you everything, and yet how have you acted? You’ve been avoiding us and giving us the silent treatment, and now you break into our little armory. I think it’s about time you’re punished for your actions.”

Before you could process Eric got off you and proceeded to flip you over, cuffing your hands behind your back. He got you to your feet, dragging you along, out of the room and down the hall. Soon enough you were in the living room, avoiding the gazes of the others who were around. Eric shoved you onto the couch and then the tip of the knife was under your chin.

“How do you think we should punish you?”

“What’s all this?” Sunwoo asked. “What punishment?”

“You know, for ignoring us, and breaking into the armory.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s cause for punishment. Not sure about the knife though.”

“Well, I need her to behave.”

“But there’s still no need for such things.”

Sangyeon entered the room, having gotten a message about the show going on in the house. Soon enough the others joined too and he could see how you tried to make yourself small. He didn’t want you to be afraid, or feel threatened by them, so seeing Eric playing around with a knife was very much not allowed. He went over to the younger boy and took the item from him, throwing it and embedding it in the wall.

“I wasn’t going to hurt her with it.”

“I don’t doubt that, but why don’t you play with something else.”

“Oh, what does the big boss have in mind?” Hyunjae asked. “I’d love to participate.”

“For starters, we have to set the mood. Jacob, you know what I mean.”

“I do indeed. I’ll be right back.”

“She also needs a party favor.”

“Why that?” Juyeon questioned. “Don’t you think that’s risky?”

“It’ll be more fun, for everyone.”

You had no idea what any of that meant, but you knew it couldn’t be good. There was no point even attempting to run off as everyone was in the room with you. A while later Jacob returned with a small case in hand, giving it to Sangyeon. The eldest opened it up, revealing a needle. You instinctively tried to move, unaware of what the contents the needle contained.

“We’re not gonna hurt you.” Sangyeon assured. “Hold her.”

Kevin and Changmin reached over to hold you still as Sangyeon emptied out the needle into your neck. You did your best to squirm, but there was nothing you could do.

“What is that! What did you give me!?”

“You’ll see soon enough.” Kevin teased. “Now the party favor, right?”

“Give her a moment.” Sangyeon said. “Then she can have it.”

“Have what? What are you guys talking about!”

“Just be patient.”

You cut yourself off before saying more as you began to feel different. Your face was beginning to burn, and you felt this heat overtaking you. Now it was obvious what they had given you, and it wasn’t hard to guess what came next. You couldn’t help but squirm in your restraints, starting to get annoyed by your own clothes, but unable to remove them. You felt rather pathetic too, giving in so easily to the drug, but it was really clouding your head and making everything fuzzy.

“Now for the next part.”

“I call dibs!” Chanhee volunteered. “Come here, baby.”

You were vaguely aware of Chanhee as he approached you, but you didn’t know what he was doing. That is until he leaned in to kiss you. At first you thought it was a normal kiss, his tongue forcing your lips to part, but then you felt something in your mouth, and before you knew it you had swallowed it. That got enough sense in you that you pulled away from Chanhee, immediately coughing and bending over, hoping to throw it back up, but that wasn’t an option. Chanhee placed a hand over your mouth, forcing you to sit back up.

“Don’t be wasteful.”

You were worried about what else they had added to the mix. Chanhee didn’t move his hand away until he was certain you wouldn’t be able to throw up the substance you had taken. You still coughed when you had a chance, but you knew it was far too late for that.

“What did you give me!”

“You’ll feel it in a moment.” Haknyeon giggled. “And you’ll like it.”

“… wa… what does that-”

You inhaled sharply as you felt this wave of energy surge through your body. There was the heat of arousal, but this was something else, something more. You were merely taking in the feeling when you snapped your arms free, having broken the chain of your restraints. You fell from the couch onto your hands and knees, shocked over what you had just done. You vaguely made out the sounds of laughter around you, looking up to see the boys with smiles on their faces. Your head was spinning, and you felt a hand on your shoulder which caused you to act. In the blink of an eye you had Changmin pinned beneath you.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?”

“What… what is this… what did you give me?”

“Power.” Changmin chuckled. “At least now we won’t break you.”

The boy freed himself from your grasp and flipped your positions. He gave you a devilish grin before ripping your shirt open. Your hands immediately covered your chest and then you moved to shove Changmin off you. To your surprise you had the strength to do so, knocking him to the ground. He just laughed, not at all fazed by your actions. You stared at your hands again, seeing the remains of the handcuffs on your wrists. If you were really strong like them now, then this was your chance. Just as you were about to run, Younghoon came up from behind, wrapping his arms around you and holding you in a hug. You tried to break free, but he held you tightly, making you question your own strength and his.

“You may be strong,” Younghoon whispered. “But you don’t match us.”

Hyunjae stepped in front of you, his hands gliding over your bare chest. He stopped over your crotch area, his fingers undoing your shorts and a hand slipping into your pants. You squirmed back against Younghoon, but he held you still.

“You’re supposed to be drunk off love.” Hyunjae commented. “Shall I help?”

“Let go.”

“The surge of power probably overtook the aphrodisiac. I’ll fix that.”

You kept your squirming so Hyunjae opted to slide your shorts down, leaving you in your panties for a moment before having them torn off. You shivered from the sudden cold feeling, trying to close your legs but Hyunjae forced them open.

“Be a good girl now, or else you won’t get a treat.”

You couldn’t say anything as Hyunjae’s fingers ran up and down along your folds, making you hold back a moan. You weren’t knowledgeable in this area, and had little to no experience. There wasn’t much time, or interest in the matter, both from you and other parties. This was certainly going to be a first for many things. You still tried to move away, but the more Hyunjae played around with you the harder it was to think.

“… please…”

“Please what? I think you can still use words.”

“… please…”

“Are you a virgin baby? Don’t know what to ask for?”

“…”

“You are, aren’t you? Oh, don’t worry baby, we’re gonna take very good care of you.”

“I wanna do it! I wanna go first!” Chanhee volunteered. “Please, please, I wanna feel her so bad.”

“You guys can fight for it.” Sangyeon mentioned. “Winner takes all. I’ll keep the doll entertained.”

The boys agreed to Sangyeon’s proposal. The eldest took you into his arms, loving your dizzy little state. Your legs were trembling and you were whimpering over the lack of touch. Sangyeon pressed a kiss to your head.

“You good baby?”

“Hm…”

“We’ll play soon, just let the boys have their fun first.”

“We all still get a turn right?” Juyeon questioned. “Even if we don’t win.”

“I’m pretty sure she can keep up with all of us tonight.”

“Good.”

Sangyeon picked you up bridal style, following behind the others. You were subconsciously rubbing your legs together, trying to get back some friction. The moment of power you had was long gone from your mind, the heat engulfing every inch of your skin. It was getting a bit uncomfortable, but the little kisses Sangyeon pressed against your skin felt nice. In your haze all you could think about was them. Even if you had been brought here against your will they hadn’t been cruel to you in any way. They had given you space and let you roam around the house freely, but that was all about to change. You couldn’t fathom the consequences that would come tomorrow, nor did you care. You just wanted to be taken care of in every way possible tonight.

❤

You inhaled sharply as you regained consciousness, feeling a minor throb in your head. You groaned and pushed your head further into the pillow it was resting on, feeling a dull ache all over your body. Once you got yourself together you took in your surroundings. This wasn’t the room you had been given, but going by the decorations and mess, it certainly belonged to one of the boys. Your questions were answered as a hand draped over you and you saw Kevin laying next to you, still asleep or so you thought. He must have felt your gaze on him, or heard you whimpering.

“Morning…”

You didn’t answer, instead moving Kevin’s arm off you and getting out of bed. Although as soon as you stood up you felt dizzy and collapsed to the floor. You managed to catch yourself, getting your hands beneath you, but you winced from a sudden pain in your left hand. You looked down to see a butterfly tattoo on your wrist, one wing blue and the other orange, wrapped up as it was still fresh.

“What… what is this…”

“You might feel sick after your first time…” Kevin mumbled. “Bathroom’s on the left…”

“Huh?”

You weren’t exactly listening, more focused on the new ink you had, but as soon as Kevin mentioned it you felt an ache in your stomach and then you threw up. Kevin groaned when he heard the noise, mustering up the strength to get up. He came over to the other side of the bed, seeing you on your hands and knees.

“My poor baby, come on, let’s get you cleaned up.”

Kevin grabbed your arm and gently got you up to your feet, keeping you close as he helped you towards the bathroom. He sat you down on the toilet, getting a washcloth and holding it under warm water before using it to clean your mouth. You were out of it after throwing up, feeling unsteady and the headache had gotten worse. You probably figured this is what it felt like to be hungover since you never had alcohol before. Then again you hadn’t been drinking last night, something else entirely had happened.

“I know what will make you feel better.”

After cleaning you up and brushing your teeth Kevin helped you onto your feet again, leading you out of the room and towards the kitchen. The others were already up and gathering around for breakfast. A few didn’t hesitate to place a kiss on your cheek after greeting you. Kevin had you sit at the table, letting you put your head down.

“Rough morning?” Changmin questioned. “She doesn’t look so good.”

“She’s fine, but I’m gonna need to clean my room.” Kevin mentioned. 

“Yikes. Well, you choose to take her.”

“It’s whatever.”

You were vaguely aware of all the boys around you, feeling more tired than anything else. You had your arms on the table, and you looked over at the tattoo on your wrist. A part of you still thought you were just imagining things, but the throbbing ache from it told you it was very real.

“Here.” Jacob placed a glass on the table in front of you. “You’ll feel better once you drink this.”

“What is it…”

“Just drink it.”

Jacob helped you sit up, and he held the glass up to your lips. It looked a bit like a watered down blue sports drink, but you parted your lips when you felt the liquid against them, getting a sweet taste and having a few gulps.

“Good girl.”

Your headache certainly wasn’t as bad anymore, so you had no trouble sitting up. Two of the others were finishing setting the table, and the smell of eggs and rice filled the air. You were certainly hungry, but now that you could think straight there were other things on your mind.

“What happened last night…”

“You don’t remember, baby?” Sunwoo chuckled. “Did we fuck you that good.”

“… you… we… we did…”

“You were asking for it by the time we actually got started.” Eric commented. “You were so needy like a bitch in heat.”

“Shut up.” You felt your face burning. “I… I…”

“No need to be shy, baby, we had a good time.”

“I don’t remember…”

“It’ll come to you.” Hyunjae stated. “Just give it a minute. If not, well, I don’t mind jogging your memory.”

“Don’t…”

“Why? You certainly weren’t denying any of us last night.”

“I…”

As the conversation kept going you felt yourself getting nervous. The night must have been insane if you didn’t remember it, especially considering the fact you got a tattoo. You wanted to remember, you had to, because besides the obvious there was something else. You shut your eyes to focus, and when you suddenly felt a hand on your shoulder you jumped, falling out of your seat. That’s when you had a rush of images flash through your mind. Your whole body suddenly felt hot and you remembered what had caused all the aches and pains from last night.

Sangyeon held you close as the others fought for the chance to be your first. He had you on his lap straddling his thigh. He couldn’t help but bounce you up and down, hands on your hips guiding you as he had you gently grind on him as well. It wasn’t long before he had a tent in his pants, but he had enough self control to not act on his own urges. He wanted to make sure his boys still had their reward. You on the other hand were full of sugar, drooling a bit and feeling like cotton candy. You had your eyes shut and head thrown back as you let Sangyeon take control, keeping you so well balanced on the edge. You weren’t aware of the fight going on, more focused on yourself until you felt a kiss on your head.

When you opened your eyes you saw Haknyeon smiling down at you. For a moment you swore he had a busted lip and cut on his cheek but those seemed to fade away right before your eyes. He was out of breath but very happy to see you. He took you from Sangyeon, throwing you over his shoulder and smacking your ass before walking off with you. He took you to his room, tossing you onto the bed. Before you knew it he was on top of you, kissing you roughly and exploring your naked body. You didn’t really feel cold, the heat of arousal kept you warm and now you had Haknyeon to provide you with more warmth. 

He had his way with you for a good while, the feeling of his cock sending you spiraling into your first orgasm. You didn’t need much prep as Sangyeon had already got you feeling loose. Another orgasm or two later there were knocks at the door. The winner had gotten his prize so now it was time for the others to have their fun. Juyeon was the one to drag you out of bed, surprised you could still walk on your own. Despite already having a few orgasms you still had the strength and stamina to keep up, although you were more concerned with getting your next high.

You happily went with Juyeon, getting messy with him in his own room. He was excited to show you new things, wanting more than just vanilla sex. Although he wasn’t alone, having Changmin and Chanhee in his room waiting for you. There were hands all over your body, massaging your breasts and thighs as wet kisses were placed all over you. With all that attention you were getting lost in the feeling of pleasure. The only thing that took you out of it was when you felt someone penetrate your core. One after the other stretching you out and making you feel a joy you couldn’t describe. You don’t know how you managed to take on all three of them, but you made it through their endeavors.

The night was still young, and you weren’t done with them. While you lay among the boys, splayed out on the bed, finally getting a moment to rest you felt a hand caress your cheeks. You opened your eyes to Kevin coaxing you awake. He took your hand and pulled you out of the giant cuddle pile, asking if you were having fun. By then words were difficult, but the smile on your face spoke for itself. You two danced around the hall since you were starting to get uneasy on your feet. You were probably heading over to Kevin’s room, but your arm was suddenly grabbed and you were yanked into Hyunjae’s arms. He had started you off early that night, and it was about time he finished that up.

His fingers trailed along your sloppy center, feeling just what kind of mess you had between your legs and eager to add to it. Of course Kevin wasn’t just going to let him have you all to yourself, shoving the two into the nearest bedroom, getting out of his clothes in the process. Everyone’s kiss was unique, some gentle, some rough, some desperate and hungry for you. Hyunjae was the first one to add to the festivities, tying you up against the bed and limiting your movements. You were already feeling sore, but he wasn’t going to let that stop him. While Hyunjae continued to play with your sloppy cunt Kevin was preparing something else.

You felt him trail his fingers along your lips, teasing you before pushing two digits into your mouth. Instinctively you knew to suck on them, letting your tongue swirl around. Kevin was quite proud to see you acting appropriately, and for that you deserved a reward. He pulled his fingers out with a loud pop, letting you whine for a bit before putting something much bigger against your lips. You opened your mouth without question, taking in his whole length inch by inch. Then you felt Hyunjae filling you up, getting stimulated from both ends. You let them take control, just floating on cloud nine as they got another handful of orgasms out of you, making your eyes roll to the back of your head multiple times.

Once you were finally wrapped up in Hyunjae’s arms you were really feeling sore in your legs and jaw. You did want to rest, but as you were dozing off a hand came down and pulled your head off the pillow. You were met with Eric’s piercing gaze, seeing a rather psychotic glint in his eyes. Of course you weren’t gonna get off easy, he still had to punish you for you breaking and entering. You probably should have explained to him at some point you found the door unlocked, but that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon, nor would it matter to him. Despite Hyunjae’s protest Eric took you to his own room.

Although it wasn’t long before you were joined by another. Sunwoo had crawled into bed, pulling you into his arms and snuggling against you. He wanted to be soft and sweet but Eric had other plans. Took a bit of talking but he got Sunwoo on board. Next thing you knew you were on top of Sunwoo, barely able to make out his words of praise. His hands ran up and down along your chest, taking your breasts into his hands and massaging them ever so gently. You mewled at his touch, gently rocking your hips. You were exhausted, but your body still craved more friction. Eric placed his hands on your hips, guiding you down onto Sunwoo’s cock, making sure you took in everything.

He gave you a moment to revel in the feeling before bending you over. You didn’t know what he was planning until he pushed himself into you right alongside Sunwoo. The stretch was like nothing before, and you swear you saw white for a moment. You leaned back against Eric, giggling as he whispered dirty things in your ear. They gave you a moment to adjust and really feel them before they started moving. They tried to be gentle and slow at first but their own burgers got the better of them. You felt like they were tearing you apart, but in a good way. Your orgasms all blended together, and all you remembered was ending up sandwiched between them, still full with their cocks and cum while you all wound down from your high.

One moment you were in bed, the next you were in someone else’s arms. You could barely make out Sangyeon as he carried you bridal style, but the smile was obvious. You snuggled against him, not wanting to let go when he set you down. You felt hands on your body once more, and not just too. A hand grabbed your chin and you locked eyes with Jacob. He had such a content smile on his face, placing soft kisses all over you. The eldest of the bunch had been patiently waiting to finish you off. You were already at your limits but they pushed you past that, taking you in whatever way you saw fit. 

Younghoon had you bouncing up and down on him, making deeper bruises on your hips. Jacob was gentler and such a tease as he took you from behind while you stayed on top of Younghoon, letting the other watch the show. Sangyeon though, he dragged you out of bed and took you against the wall, surprising you with his strength and resolve. He didn’t let up, making sure you were still enjoying yourself even if you were so far gone. It wasn’t easy to close your legs, and you felt so full you swear your stomach was a bit bigger. You thought you’d finally get to sleep, but you weren’t going to be left alone just yet.

You could vaguely recall Sangyeon getting you into a bath with him, cleaning you up and making sure you were well cared for after such a night. Kevin had found the two of you and helped with getting you dressed. Everyone else was mostly out for the night. Kevin’s room was one that wasn’t used to so he offered to share his bed, happily taking you with so the two of you could sleep together. You didn’t hesitate to snuggle against him, still feeling sore but glad to finally wind down and rest. It was quite impressive you made it through such a night. You knew you’d probably be all kinds of bruised tomorrow, but that was a problem for later.

You couldn’t help the dopey smile on your face as you remembered all of this, all the things you had done the night prior. It was like nothing you had ever experienced before, and you didn’t even know if you’d get close to it ever again. Although you quickly had to tell yourself to get your act together. Even if you now remembered what you had done, you could look back and see what was bothering you. The boys had given you an aphrodisiac, but there was something else too. You sat up, lifting up your shirt and seeing that you had no bruise or marks of any kind. Your skin was untouched, but you knew that shouldn’t be the case. While you were lost in your own head Juyeon and Eric helped you get back in your seat.

“Are you okay, baby?” Eric asked. “Did you remember something?”

“Last night…”

“Oh, that’s good. Wouldn’t want to be the only one to remember how capable you are.”

“What did you give me?”

“Ah that, it was good, right?”

“What was it!?”

“Power.” Jacob stated. “True power.”

“It was a drug.”

“So is ibuprofen, your point?”

“What exactly did you give me?”

“I already told you. Power. Don’t you remember? You broke the handcuffs with ease, you kept up with all of us. Despite how rough some of them might have been, you don’t have a single bruise on your body.”

“…”

“It’s temporary.” Younghoon assured. “You’re back to normal now. Although, if you ever want more, you just have to ask. Only the first one is free.”

You needed a moment, you needed to be alone. Without saying anything you left the table, finding the nearest open room and locking yourself inside. You felt a bit sick, coming to terms with the fact they had given you some sort of unknown drug. Now you only had the lingering taste of that power high. You didn’t want to believe what they had told you, but you had felt, and moreover you had seen it too. That night at the warehouse, the incredible strength they displayed, it was all real and now you knew how. Whatever drug this was, they used it a lot. You had your suspicions about their business, especially once you saw all the weapons. If they were some kind of gang in the area, they certainly had their advantage to stay in power.

All this speculation just gave you more reason to want to leave. Even if they were good to you, the kind of life they lived wasn’t something you wanted to be a part of. After that night you continued to avoid them, not wanting to form any kind of lasting attachment. They certainly gave you space, but were a bit more willing to try for your attention, especially since they had no problem getting handsy with you now. From what you did get, they seemed to be so fun, but you couldn’t just drop the idea of escape. Your biggest problem was that ankle bracelet you had, but it seemed the solution was around the corner.

One day you overheard a few of the boys talking about a potential party at the house. Of course you came up as a subject since they weren’t sure they could trust you to behave. A party would be a great opportunity, so you had to make sure you were allowed to attend. In order for that to happen you had to engage with them and socialize, show them that you could behave. You really had to let your guard down and be friendly with them. You rejected any advances they made and they respected that, probably very happy that you were done giving them the cold shoulder. Eventually the party came up in conversation around you, so you offered to help with planning and set up. They happily agreed.

You made sure a lot of alcohol was purchased, and intended to get them drunk. This was going to be your night, but in order to do this you needed one key ingredient. You needed the ankle bracelet off, and fast, and the only real solution you saw was that drug. You had broken handcuffs with ease, so with that kind of power you’d break the ankle bracelet quickly and then get out before they even knew you were gone. The only problem was that you had to ask for it, and not get denied. You didn’t see why they would say no, but you also needed to make sure you didn’t arouse suspicion.

The day of the party you helped with setting up, popping open a bottle of vodka and taking a small sip before pouring shots for the others. They happily took the drink you offered, cheering to a night of fun. You needed to pick one of them and you figured your best bet would be Eric. You kept your eye on him and waited for your chance. People were starting to come to the house, so you figured things would be getting started soon. You found Eric and got him alone, coming up from behind and wrapping your arms around him in a hug. He was a bit startled at first, but happy to see you, placing a kiss on your head.

“Eric.”

“Hm?”

“I want tonight to be fun.”

“It will be.”

“But you know what would guarantee it?”

“What?”

“If I got to be strong like the rest of you…”

“Ah, you want a special party favor, huh?”

“It should last me all night right? How else am I gonna keep up with all of you?”

“Good point, but promise you’ll behave.”

“Pinky promise.”

“Good girl.”

Eric took your hand and led you to another room. It was another armory they had, and he told you to stay put as he got something out of a safe. He presented a pill to you, telling you to open your mouth. Your plan had been to take it later when you were ready to act, but Eric wasn’t going to let you leave without consuming it. As far as you knew, it lasted a few hours, so you should be okay either way, but you were gonna have to act the first chance you got. You gave Eric a smile and took the pill. After a moment you felt this spark of power run through your whole body. It made you dizzy for a second but Eric assured you the uneasiness would pass and you’d be your normal self, just better.

Soon enough the party began and things got wild fast. You made it a point not to drink, but you still hung around the boys, wanting to engage with them for a bit before disappearing. As the night was getting on, you started to iron out the finer details of your escape. When you had a chance you glanced outside, seeing all the cars parked around. You considered taking one, but you didn’t know how to drive. What you needed was to get your hands on a phone, figure out your location and call a cab. With everyone around drinking and having a good time, it shouldn’t be hard to sneak a phone, and money, off someone.

You kept in mind the time, keeping an eye out for someone vulnerable, and occasionally testing your strength to make sure you were still able to break free. You stuck around those that were drinking, getting friendly with someone and managing to snatch their phone. You cautiously snuck away to get some privacy, finding a bathroom. You managed to unlock the phone and checked the address. Thankfully you weren’t so far from civilization and called for a cab. You had about fifteen minutes to get out of this house, and the first thing you needed to do was get that ankle bracelet off.

You sat down on the floor and figured out a good grip, taking in a deep breath before pulling and breaking the bracelet in half. You thought maybe some noise would be made or something, but it was silent. Lucky was on your side. You tossed the broken thing in the trash and made your way out of the bathroom, needing to get outside. Part of the party was in the backyard, but it wasn’t a good idea to go around, so you had to exit through the front. The door itself might not be the best, but you could give it a shot. If not, you had no problem jumping out a window. Thankfully you got away from the house undetected, checking the phone and then leaving it by a car before heading to the main road.

When you saw the lights of the cab you were finally able to let out a breath. It brought such relief to be moving away from the house, free from your captivity. The cab took you back to the only place you could go, to your uni campus. You had been gone for a little over two weeks, but hopefully nothing had gotten messed up in your absence. You knocked on the door for your roommate to let you in, not bothering to answer them about your recent whereabouts. You were so happy to collapse into your bed, even if it wasn’t as comfortable, feeling like you could finally get some real sleep. 

Thankfully a good amount of your things had been in your dorm room, but you would need a new phone, and new cards. Come morning you got to emailing your professors with some basic excuse of being ill and asking for assignments to make up. Out of curiosity you tested your strength, but you were back to being a normal person. At least you had money, so you could afford a new ID card, and even though you could afford a new phone, that involved leaving campus. You knew the guys couldn’t just waltz onto school property, and they didn’t know where your dorm was, so this was the safest place for you. By now they sure knew you were gone and probably pissed, which meant you were in danger.

Your best bet for now was to wait, just let this all die down and maybe they would forget about you and move on. The bright side to not having a phone was that they had no means of reaching you. As for your classes, you still had your laptop and could email classmates and do assignments. It was kinda hard going back to your lectures as if nothing had happened. Of course you had a decent amount of work to catch up on, and your grades were gonna take a hit, but at least you were free. Even if that was true, you did have this uneasy feeling. You felt paranoid, like you were always being watched. You couldn’t sleep that easy anymore, and you felt quite irritable. Still you did your best to just focus on being a normal university student.

“Nice tattoo.”

You were taking notes in a class when someone had made the comment. At first you were confused, but then you remembered the butterfly tattoo on your wrist. You never asked about it, not remembering how you got it anyway. After that night of passion you were out cold, and they had probably done it then. It was the least of your worries and even now you had completely forgotten about it until someone brought it up. The tattoo wasn’t a bother, but it wasn’t your thing, nor did you want any sort of connection to them. You did a bit of research and made a call to set up an appointment with a tattoo artist to have your tattoo removed. It was risky to go out, but you wanted that thing gone.

You made sure to cover up and hide your face, constantly checking your surroundings to make sure you weren’t being followed. This little outing of yours was dangerous, but if it wall went down in one piece you could probably start to relax. Since you were out, you figured you could get a new phone too. After the tattoo removal of course. Thankfully you made it to the shop without issue, introducing yourself and being moved to the back. You were glad there weren’t any windows where you were seated, so you felt less worried about removing your jacket, hat and mask. The chair you were in was like a dentist chair, but it was quite cozy.

“Alright, I’m Hongjoong, I’ll be your artist today, although I believe you’re here for a tattoo removal.”

“Yeah, just a crazy night, and I made a mistake.”

“No worries. Can you show me where the tattoo is?”

“Sure.” You rolled up your sleeve. “It’s this.”

“Oh…”

“Is there a problem?”

“No, no, not at all. It’s pretty.”

“I want it gone.”

“Yeah, of course. I will need to strap down your arm though.”

“What!?”

“Removing a tattoo isn’t painless and considering it is on your wrist, I don’t want you moving too much during the process.”

“Ah, that makes sense. Alright then.”

“Good. Just give me a second.”

Hongjoong got up and disappeared for a moment, coming back and using a belt to strap down your arm. He made sure it wasn’t uncomfortable, and that it should allow him to work without issue. He got up once again, giving you a chance to collect yourself. Although when he returned he grabbed your other arm and strapped it down as well.

“What are you doing!?”

You tried to fight him, but your other arm was already restrained. Hongjoong didn’t answer you, he just made sure you couldn’t escape and then left you alone. You screamed at him, then started crying for help, hoping someone else would come, but there was no one. You continued your attempt of escape, but it got you nowhere. When you heard the door you started screaming again. You heard footsteps approaching, thinking you were finally gonna get some help but you immediately went silent when you saw who approached.

“Well, well, well, look what we have here.”

“I didn’t harm her.” Hongjoong commented.

“Good. I’m glad we’re still on the same page.” Sangyeon chuckled. “Care to explain yourself, baby?”

You didn’t want to meet Sangyeon’s gaze, but you could feel his eyes digging into you. He didn’t need a response from you. Instead he had the other boys gag you and then untie you, dragging you out of the shop. You wound up in the back of a car, sandwiched between Changmin and Younghoon, knowing very well their strength outmatched you, so there was no escaping them. Of course you wound up back at that house. You were dragged inside and taken down below, thrown into an empty room. You got the gag off yourself and tried to run for the door, only to get tossed back.

“What the hell were you thinking!” Sangyeon yelled. “Did you really think a stunt like that would work!?”

“I got out of this house, didn’t I?”

“Oh, aren’t you quite cocky for a dead girl walking.”

“What?”

“You’re doing much better than we thought.” Hyunjae mentioned. “We thought you’d be hospitalized by now.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Did you forget again?” Eric questioned. “The night of the party you asked for power. I should have known better.”

“You were the easiest target.”

“You bitch!”

Eric wanted to get a hit, but he was held back by Juyeon and Sunwoo. You were putting on quite a brave act, but the truth was you were terrified. You had done well to avoid their grasp, but in the end they still caught you.

“What the fuck do you guys want with me! And what’s with this talk about death? Are you gonna kill me this time?”

“Oh no, none of that.” Jacob said. “But the truth is you are dying. Haven’t you felt it?”

“Felt what?”

“The withdrawal.”

“Huh?”

“What? You think taking drugs doesn’t have its consequences?”

“I…  what?”

Chanhee chuckled. “After using the drug you’re supposed to take something else to negate the side effects. Remember the little hangover cure we gave you the first time?”

“… why didn’t you tell me this!”

“Why would we? It’s a means of keeping you in line.”

“You-”

“It seems it hasn’t hit you that hard yet, but it’s only gonna get worse. Surely you’ve had trouble sleeping by now, maybe feeling irritable and jumpy? It’s the withdrawal.”

“…”

“You’re gonna start feeling really sick soon.” Juyeon mentioned. “And it’s possible to get to a point of no return. We wouldn’t want you dying, now would we?”

“Where is it! Where’s this cure of yours!”

“Do you seriously think we’re just gonna give it to you? After the stunt you pulled?”

“You’re the ones who knowingly put my life in danger!”

“You asked for it. You asked for all of it. A night of passion like never before, and a night of power. Don’t blame us.”

“Fine. What do you want?”

“Seriously?” Haknyeon questioned. “Is it not obvious?”

“Amuse me.”

“You, silly. We want you, and we’ll do anything to get you back.”

“So if you want your cure.” Kevin added. “No more running away.”

“And if I refuse?”

“Oh, you really wanna play with your life? We can always come back to this conversation when sunlight starts to hurt you.”

“Wait.”

“Hm?”

“I… I’ll stay… but…”

“This isn’t a negotiation.” Sunwoo stated.

“I want to go back to school.”

“What?”

“I still want to be able to study and get my degree. You can drop me off and pick me. I won’t-”

“I said-”

“Sure.” Sangyeon interrupted. “Why not.”

“Sangyeon-”

“Hand it over.”

The others stared at Sangyeon with questioning looks, not really agreeing with his decision, but he wasn’t gonna hear anything else. Jacob came over and handed him a water 

bottle with a similar blue sports drink color. Sangyeon opened it up and handed it to you.

“Drink it. Every last drop.”

This was what they had given you last time, so you did trust it. You emptied out the water bottle, immediately feeling this tension leaving you body. Perhaps all your worries weren’t just in your head, but part of the side effects to this drug of theirs.

“Better?”

“Yes.”

“Now we can talk.”

“Wat-”

You were suddenly shoved up against the wall, hand around your throat. Sangyeon had you pinned, glaring daggers at you. It was hard to breathe, and you tried clawing at his arm but he didn’t budge at all.

“You know, the second you broke that ankle bracelet we knew, but our guests kept us distracted so you got very lucky. That won’t be happening again.”

“I… I’ll… I’ll come… back…”

Sangyeon chuckled. “It’s funny you think I’m actually letting you set foot outside this house again.”

“You… you-”

“I make the rules here. The thing is, you just don’t get it.”

Sangyeon grabbed your arm, holding up your wrist to show you the tattoo you had. He leaned forward to place a soft kiss on it.

“This right here, it’s how we found you. It’s our mark, it lets everyone know who you belong to. Our people are everywhere, so even if you did end up in the hospital, you’d wind up right back here where you belong with us. It doesn’t matter where you go, we will find you.”

Sangyeon dropped you to your hands and knees and you gasped for air. You coughed as you tried to steady your breathing, realizing everything else that had been said previously was a lie. There was no getting out of this place, not again. After a moment Sangyeon kneeled down and grabbed your chin.

“Baby, I want you, even if I have to hurt you.”

“… why…”

“Cause you came into our lives, and you’re too good to pass up.”

“… please…”

“Don’t lie to yourself. As if you truly want to leave and return to that boring life of yours. Stay. Let us take care of you and treat you the way you deserve.”

“…”

“You’ll come around. In the meantime.” Sangyeon pulled out a pill. “Take this.”

“I… you just…”

“An ankle bracelet won’t work with you, so might as well use different means. Go on now.”

There wasn’t much of a choice here. If you didn’t do it willingly you knew Sangyeon would force it down your throat. So you took the pill, feeling that spark once more.

“Good girl. You can keep up with us better this way, and now you know you won’t last long out there if you were to leave again. Which is not gonna happen, right?”

“No…”

“I need you to say it.”

“I won’t run away again…”

“Good. You won’t regret meeting us, I promise.”

“I do.”

“Watch it. You don’t want us to test your limits again, do you? Or maybe you do. I don’t mind having a brat in this house.”

“… sorry… I… I didn’t…”

“Much better, although we do need to carry out your punishment for running away. Last time was nothing compared to this, so I hope you’re ready. You won’t be sleeping tonight.”

[midnightfantasiez]

Pineapple Slice | Octoberfest Day 4

➺ Pairing - one-night stand!Changmin x fem!reader

➺ Drink - Mimosa with a shot of vodka (aka one-night stand!au x public sex)

➺ Summary - All you wanted was to just drink the night away and forget about all of your problems, but what if someone offers you something much better than alcohol? Would you be able to reject the offer?

➺ Word Count - 1,881

➺ Warnings - Smut (18+, minors DNI), cursing, alcohol consumption, reader is pretty much drunk, messy makeouts, petnames (sweetheart, baby), dirty talk, hickeys, blowjob, cum tasting, public sex (which is also kinda rough-ish), unprotected p in v, hair pulling, reader digs her nails into Changmin's back 🫣

➺ Author’s note - hehe it's my turn for my contribution to our octoberfest collab!! surprise surprise this is written for my lovely @sungbeam / @beamtori happiest birthday 妹 i love you to the moon and back 😚❤️ this is also inspired by baekhyun's song so i highly suggest listening to it while reading this 🤭 (also hi hello @kyaroscuro 😙)

➺ Taglist - @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @mamuljji @synthwxve @j4edo @daisyvisions @momhwa-agenda @snowflakewhispers @h0mebody-heaven @nyu-topia @jaminthemiddle (join my permanent taglist here!)

➺ OctoberFest Masterlist | Main Masterlist

The sounds of the blaring music coming out from the speakers of the club were now beginning to annoy the fuck out of you instead of making you go high a couple of hours prior.

It has been a pretty rough week at work, and you needed a change of environment after being glued to your computer screen from 8 a.m. to 6 a.m. throughout the week. So you figured it wouldn’t hurt to visit a newly opened club just a few blocks from your apartment. 

Seoul was a bustling city, after all, so it’s without a doubt that the nightlife here is pretty wild and can last till sunrise the next day. It wasn’t something you were particularly fond of at the beginning since you grew up by the beach, but you figured that you had to accept it if you wanted to survive in the big city. 

Naturally, the club slowly became a place of comfort for you every once in a while after your co-workers introduced you to the party scene. You used to be terrified of even entering such places, but over time, you have loosened up and enjoyed the feeling of getting high once in a while—especially after a hectic week at work. 

Instead of calling your regulars up for company, you challenged yourself by going to the club alone. As much as you love your friends, there are also times when you rather enjoy your little alone time by yourself and take in everything that has happened throughout the week.

So off you went as you grabbed one of your jackets hanging by the doorstep, and you quickly made your way into the club by showing your ID. It was one of the largest ones you’ve been to, and it would’ve been a lie to say that you were slightly overwhelmed being in such places all alone.

Thinking of the best solution to calm your nerves, you head straight for the bar—order a cup of mimosa with a splash of vodka and almost chugging it down with a single gulp. Once the alcohol hit your systems, you knew that there was no turning back before you started ordering a couple more drinks to last throughout the night. 

Before you finally came to your senses, the bartender had to step in to stop you in your tracks—worrying that the amount of alcohol in your system would eventually bring out the opposite effect that you were planning to have. Frustrated, you snatched the bottle of vodka in his hand before slamming down a massive chunk of dollar bills onto the counter before you decided that it was good to get some fresh air at this point. 

Eventually, you didn’t end up too far from the club, where you spotted a dimly lit alleyway where you could lean back against the wall and drink to your heart's content. You couldn’t care less if people were passing by and were giving you looks—you just needed some time alone. 

Right before you were about to hit the halfway mark of drinking the vodka, a hand suddenly extended out from the side and grabbed your wrist—the figure slowly moving up close to you so that the one sole light source in the alleyway shone upon their faces, revealing a seemingly rather tall and good looking man. 

“Sweetheart, I don’t think it’s wise for you to finish that entire bottle like that. You’re going to have a horrible hangover after this,” he spoke firmly, his hand now wrapping over the bottle to try to take it away from your hands.

“Who are you, and why do you care? Leave me the hell alone! I can do whatever I want~” You slurred, slowly getting all worked up as the alcohol was taking control of your consciousness. 

But it seemed as if the man wasn’t going to give up easily, and he yanked the bottle away from your hands and placed it far up above his head, causing you to jump up and down, trying to reach for your liquor. 

“Stop it! Give it back to me!” You argued as you continued jumping before you realised that you accidentally stepped on the male’s shoe before falling straight into his embrace—his other free hand now wrapping around your waist. 

Your legs immediately go numb when you whiff the perfume he is wearing—a hint of vanilla with a mix of peony, which also happens to be one of your favourites. Unbeknownst to you, you slowly buried your face in the crook of his neck, your heavy breathing hitting the surface of his skin. 

The male was slightly taken aback by that sight, but he finally reassured you by caressing your hair a little bit before trying to pull you away so that he could talk to you face to face. “Let me escort you home, hmm? You’re better at crashing straight down onto the bed in your current state.” 

However, you refused to budge. “No~ I still can drink! I wanna drink!” 

The male shook his head for a while, seemingly trying to come up with something that could help distract you for a bit before he felt something on his pants. 

Or rather, his dick. 

The moment he looked down, your hands were slowly caressing his bulge as you looked at him full of lust. It was definitely the alcohol that made you feel this way, not to mention that invigorating scent of his that just made you want to have him. 

In the blink of an eye, you dove right in and crash your lips against his, moving your tongue around messily. The moment you felt his lips against yours, you knew you would not return home anytime soon. There was this pineapple scent on his lips—possibly from the liquor he had before crashing into you, or it was some sort of flavoured lip balm he had put on for the night.

Either way, it made you crave more, and you began to move your lips around messily before the male overpowered you by refuting back the same action. 

“Oh, now you’ve done it, sweetheart.” 

Without warning, he immediately pushed you to the walls of the alleyway before kissing you feverishly. He quickly pulled your collar down to expose that little part of your skin before he moved down to lick your sensitive spot. The moans slowly filled the alleyway and eventually the quiet night, and you did the same by unzipping his pants to dive your hands into his pants to feel him raw. 

“You like what you feel, baby? Do you wanna taste it?” The male smirked in between his kisses.

“Y-Yes, p-please I want it so bad, umm-”

“Ji Changmin, but just call me Changmin will do sweetheart,” he huffed before taking in a deep breath to continue unbuttoning your shirt to reveal your bra. 

As the tension in the air grew, you immediately bent down to pull out his full length before shoving it all into your throat. It hurt a little when you felt his cock tugging at the back of your throat, but the taste of it was what kept you going. 

His precum that was oozing out slightly from his tip tasted exactly like pineapples, just like the one on his lips that you had kissed earlier. And god, this was so much better than the vodka you were chugging down minutes ago. 

“It tastes good, doesn’t it? Much better than all of the alcohol you had consumed for the night, huh?” Changmin groaned as he grabbed a fistful of your hair to push your head deeper, making sure you wouldn’t put any of his liquids to waste.

“Mhm-mhm…” You responded to his comment as you tried to keep your mouth as wide open as you possibly could—god, you wished you could suck on this delicious cock all day long. 

With a few more jerks, you were beginning to feel more of his cum oozing out before you knew that he was close. So you decided to quicken the pace before he eventually gave in to release everything into your mouth, and you made sure to swallow every single drop of them before standing back up to wipe the excess off your lips. 

“God…you taste so sweet, Changmin…W-What’s your secret?” You asked while catching your breath.

“Would you like to find out?” He asked with a sly smile on his face before pinning you against the wall once more to lift one of your legs and pull your underwear aside to rub his dripping cock at your entrance. “Tell me how good I taste, baby. Give it to me one more time.” 

You rolled your eyes back the moment he pushed his whole length inside of you, tearing your tight walls apart. As he slowly quickened up the pace, you slammed one of your hands up against the wall as you wrapped your fingers around the concrete—the adrenaline rushing through your veins with the stimulation you were feeling with the alcohol and having sex with him at the same time.

“God! You’re so fucking good, Changmin!” You screamed as every push he made just made you crave more—the pain was now the least of your worries as you both went on for minutes. 

“You want it deeper? Do you think you can handle all of it?” He challenged with a smirk on his face.

“Y-Yes! Give it all to me!” 

“You like how sweet I taste, sweetheart?”

“Very! Ugh, harder. Harder! Changmin!” 

God, what a mess you’ve been for tonight. 

But this sight of you was a blessing to his eyes, and he was going to make sure you remember every inch of his cock and how it feels throughout your thick, sensitive walls. Most importantly, he was going to ensure that you were going to remember his taste forever.

“Hngh- I’m gonna cum, baby-” Changmin groans.

“Cum all of it for me, do it inside-” You pleaded as you placed your other hand onto his shoulders—your fingers digging deep into his skin. 

With a simple scoff that came out from his mouth, Changmin did a few more hard and deep thrusts before ejecting all of his warm, sweet liquid into you, having the excess ones drip down onto the floor as you both moaned out loud together at the same time. 

When you came down from your high, Changmin leaned in to give you a soft, gentle peck on the lips before he moved some strands of your hair that had fallen onto your face throughout that tremendous workout you both had. “So, do you still want your vodka, sweetheart?”

“Not anymore, now that I’ve tried something better,” you replied breathlessly as you rested one of your fingers on his chest, drawing circles to tease him for a bit. 

“Something tells me you want to stay, and you haven’t got enough of the sweet juices out of me, huh?” He chuckled. 

You simply just give him a teasing smile before you turn your back against him and bend down to rest against the walls as your hand reaches behind for his dripping cock to adjust it to your entrance once more.

“It’s all your fault that I got lost in your sweetness, Ji Changmin.” 

[juyeonszn]

EXCITEMENT

PAIRING ji changmin x f!reader

WORD COUNT 6.22k

GENRES smut ﹒angst ﹒fluff

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, best friends to lovers, numerous mentions of the female orgasm, ji changmin is a bit of a manwhore, mentions of alcohol, insane tension my b, intense making out x2, oral (m! and f! receiving), multiple orgasms, couch sex but missionary, unprotected sex (wrap before u fucking tap -_-), creampie, changmin is lowkey very whipped and very pussy drunk in this, also forewarning for every fic in this collab— there is lots of foreshadowing and references to the other fics since they all fall within the same timeline/universe!

SUMMARY you know, when you told your girl friends that you’d never finished before, you were expecting it to blow over like no big deal. what you weren’t expecting was for it to spiral into a whole other mess.

MORE i hope u jichang lovers are strapped in and ready for this… kinda went crazy with it 😭😭 um anyway?? first fic of the black out or back out collab?? crazy!! this fic actually ruined me. it used up all my brain power so if every other one sucks u can’t blame me!! it’s the law!! also, i’d like to take a moment to wish my boyz a very happy 6th anniversary <3 so so proud of all they’ve accomplished these past 6 years and i can’t wait to see what they do in the next 6. in this deobi shit 4L frfr 🙏🙏

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @deoboyznet @cloverdaisies @vernyangel

TAGLIST @millksea

“No fucking way.”

You blink at Soyeon. It wasn’t that hard to believe. In fact, it was pretty easy to believe. You set down the bowl of popcorn on your lap and nod slowly.

“Uh, yeah. Yes fucking way,” a nervous laugh escapes your lips. “I’ve had to fake it with every guy I’ve ever been with. I don’t know what it is. Maybe something’s wrong with me.”

Men were… incompetent at certain things. And apparently your pleasure was one of those. Every dude you’ve ever slept with failed to make you finish. It was at the point that you felt that you were the problem. It would be understandable if it had been a couple guys, but every single one? Your luck had to be complete ass.

The only reason the topic had been brought up was because Soyeon had mentioned something about her last fling during your movie night. She was talking about how that had been the best sex she's ever had and it spurred you into making your confession. The last guy you’d been with had probably been the worst.

“Never?” Jiwon’s jaw drops, elbows resting on her knees. “How are you still alive, girl? How do you get your fix?”

“My hand, my vibrator, my pillow sometimes,” you shrug, picking at a loose thread on your blanket. “I’ve learned to make do with my situation, I guess. If I can’t get it elsewhere, I’ll just do it myself, y’know?”

Your girl friends look at you with pouts on their lips, as if they were the ones experiencing your misfortunes. You hadn’t even expected it to be such a big deal. You’d thought this was a normal, common occurrence. Boys usually sucked at things when it came to girls. But they all took this as a personal hit, like you were a fallen soldier in battle.

Perhaps the female orgasm was far more important than you assumed it to be.

“Considering who your best friend is, you’d think you were getting good dick left and right,” Dahyun snorts into her glass of wine. “This is actually kinda insane.”

You guess she had a point, despite you both leading very different lives. Changmin, your best friend, was known as one of the many heartthrobs on campus. He was in a fraternity, played on the school’s baseball team, and he even played with other things. Namely the hearts of practically every other girl at your university.

You’d think it would bother you to be so close to a man who couldn’t give less of a fuck about those of the same sex as you. But for some reason, you couldn’t find it in you to care. It’s not like he was bragging about the bitches he bagged on a regular basis. Though you were his best friend, he understood boundaries. He knew what was appropriate to talk about with you and respected that.

Your friends laugh at her observation, but drop the conversation after that, resuming the movie you were watching. However, it’s not that easy for you.

You can’t stop wondering if something really *is wrong with you. Why was it that everyone and their mom was capable of finishing and you weren’t? It was more unlikely that every single man you’ve been with sexually was that mediocre. Were you really that unlucky?

It bothers you so much that you find yourself still thinking about it well into the following week.

With the start of the new semester, came the adjustment of new classes. Even though you were a Communications major, you made the grave mistake of taking Lifespan Growth and Development with Changmin for the extra credit. He was an Early Childhood Education major, so it was a requirement for him, but not for you. (Honestly, he only forced you to take it with him so you had at least one lecture together. He was afraid your friendship might start to fade if you didn’t see each other often.)

Imagine how horrified you felt when your professor began to talk about babies and their circadian rhythm, but the only thing in your head was the fact that you’d never orgasmed because of a man. You felt like you were going crazy at this point. Really, the thought should’ve been long forgotten by now. But you couldn’t help yourself from dwelling on it, especially after your friends made jokes at your expense.

As you’re walking out of the lecture hall side by side with Changmin, you keep your focus on the ground, your hearing going in and out. His voice is staticy, your brain only registering words here and there. You’re a little pissed off that this has become such an issue.

He notices your lack of response and stops walking, eyebrows furrowed. You pause in your tracks along with him. “Are you good? You’ve been spacing out all morning.”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you shake your head as if that would rid of these stupid thoughts. “I’m just a little tired, I guess. I haven’t been getting much sleep.”

“Well, you better fix that. We’re expecting this weekend’s party to be one of the bigger ones this semester. Juyeon’s passing those fliers around like it’s his job,” Changmin purses his lips with a snort, ruffling your hair. “I need my beer pong partner to be in tip-top shape.”

You scratch the back of your neck. Half of you was kind of hesitant to go to this weekend’s TBZ party considering that was where you met the dude who started this whole downward spiral. He made an offhand comment about seeing you again, but you were actually hoping that would never happen. And with your fortune, the probability of running into him was pretty high.

“You see…“ You begin, but Changmin interrupts you with a distressed groan before you can continue.

“Don’t tell me you’re thinking of flaking,” his arms fall to his sides as his head tips back dramatically. “Y/N, I really need you there. How else am I gonna smoke everyone? I need— I mean we need to keep our title.”

Sometimes you wish Ji Changmin took anything else as seriously as he takes beer pong. You suppose it came with being a fraternity brother or something. They all drank alcohol like it was fucking water. You’re still sort of surprised none of them (Sunwoo) has gotten alcohol poisoning yet.

“I’m just… trying to avoid someone. And they’ll probably be there.” You sigh, fiddling with your fingers. Your best friend gives you an unreadable look that flashes across his face only for a moment.

“Tell me who it is. I’ll make sure they’re not allowed in. I’d much rather have you there than some rando who’s bugging you.” He says, shoving his hands into the pockets of his cargo pants.

“That’s really unne—“

“Yo, Changmin! Aren’t you going with us to Cobie’s?”

You both turn towards the sudden intrusion, the voice belonging to Eric Sohn. He’s around 50 feet away from where you’re standing, joined by Kim Sunwoo and Ju Haknyeon. Changmin yells out his answer and spins back to you, an apologetic smile on his face. Somehow, you’re a little grateful for the interruption.

“We’ll finish this later, okay?” He nods at you, heading backwards in their direction. “You’re going, Y/N.”

You really should’ve listened to your instincts when they told you to skip out on the party.

You’re well aware that every attendee was crucial for the TBZ boys and their stupid rivalry with the KAT girls. So maybe you understood why Changmin needed you there so badly, aside from the obvious beer pong thing. However, you were starting to regret showing up.

First of all, Ji Changmin was nowhere to be found. Second of all, Jeon Soyeon was hounding you all night about the secret you so idiotically shared with your gal pals.

She was dead set on finding you a solution. (Basically, she was scanning the crowd of partygoers for a suitable man to satisfy your overdue needs. And she was proving devastatingly unsuccessful.)

You were too anxious to drink, also. Your feet were bouncing from where you sat on the couch, and your fingers couldn’t stop fidgeting. The antsiness was getting annoying at this point and you were hoping your knight in shining armor (Ji Changmin) revealed himself soon. Lest he wanted to lose out on his beloved beer pong partner.

It appears that your years of honing in on your manifestation powers have finally come to fruition when you spot Younghoon and Juyeon hauling the beer pong table into the living room. Where one of those tables are stationed, you know you’re guaranteed to find your best friend. The shorter of the two gentle giants cups his hands around his mouth and announces the first round of tonight’s tournament.

You stand from your seat, grabbing the opportunity to break free of Soyeon’s efforts to pimp you out. You’re ready to confirm you and Changmin’s spot in the tournament, when you see that you’ve already been beaten to it. It takes absolutely everything in you not to let your jaw drop and your eyes to tear up.

Some girl who happens to be in your Lifespan Growth and Dev class (you think her name is Iseul) is draped over Changmin’s arm, signing them up for the first round. He doesn’t look like he wants to, but makes no effort to refuse her.

You don’t know why it irks you. It shouldn’t irk you.

You’ve never cared about who he spends his free time with in the past. It’s been so easy for you to let his behavior slide, brushing it under the rug like it was no biggie. But this time, you care a whole lot. You chalk it up to the fact that he was seemingly replacing you as his beer pong partner, even though that was the entire reason why he wanted you to come to the party.

Yeah. That’s why.

Your tongue darts out to wet your lips just as Hyunjae passes by, no doubtedly heading to the beer pong table. You catch the sleeve of his polo and force him to halt in his steps. You’re not even sure why the hell he’s wearing a polo in the first place, his outfit embodying the stereotypical frat boy perfectly. This looked nothing like his usual wardrobe.

“Oh, hey Y/N, what’s up?” He smiles that award-winning Hyunjae smile, the one that manages to charm every girl in the room every single time he pulls it out. He brings the brim of his red solo cup up to his lips and finishes whatever’s left in it with one swig. Maybe this was a bad idea.

“Do you wanna be my beer pong partner?” Okay, well now you’ve said it so there’s no going back.

His eyebrow shoots up in a mixture of shock and pleasant surprise. “Me? You’re not gonna ask Changmin?”

“He’s…” Your eyes flitter over to where he stands with Iseul(?), Hyunjae’s following. No. You’re okay. This isn’t getting to your head at all. Everything’s cool and peachy. “He’s too preoccupied.”

Hyunjae chooses not to say anything, instead nudging you over to the opposite end of the table. Changmin’s eyes widen when he sees the two of you, even having the audacity to look scandalized. God, maybe that was his biggest fault. He was so entitled.

So, it was just fine for him to bail on you in favor of some girl he didn’t even know, but the second you talk to one of his frat brothers, it’s off the table? What a fucking hypocrite. The whole ordeal was actually beginning to get on your nerves now. All you wanted to do was win this stupid beer pong game to show him that he’ll never find a partner as good as you.

Woah. Holy shit, Y/N. You need to dial it back a bit with the possessiveness. That was a lot, especially for you.

Juyeon narrows his eyes at you and then glances over to Changmin, the cogs turning in his head slowly. You’re not sure if that’s because he’s so used to seeing you both on the same side of the beer pong table, or because his vision was so shitty. Either way, it has you cowering behind Hyunjae a little as he dips the ping pong ball into the cup of water in the center.

“Okay, you know the rules. Let’s have a healthy, friendly game,” Younghoon says, tapping the table with a smile. “No playing dirty. I’m looking at you, Hyunjae.”

The brunette raises his hands in surrender, doing a quick bout of rock, paper, scissors with Changmin to determine which team went first. He wins with a quirk of his lips, sauntering back over to you. After rolling his neck around and popping his fingers, he tosses the ball right into Changmin and Iseul’s center cup.

You hate to admit it, but Hyunjae’s actually pretty good at this. You’ve never really paid attention to anyone else’s beer pong skills considering you’ve only ever played with Changmin as your partner. Who knows, maybe you’ll switch over permanently after this. At least, you might if he keeps up whatever it is that he’s doing.

Your best friend’s jaw tightens as he grabs the red solo cup, chugging what’s inside. He huffs and takes his turn, nearly missing with the way the ball circles around the rim. He sighs in relief at the same time you grimace. You still hadn’t had anything to drink all night and starting with fucking beer was probably the worst idea.

The game probably would’ve been a bit more competitive had Iseul been decent at beer pong, but she sucked. So Hyunjae and yourself always kept your lead by one cup or more. Karma is a dish best served cold, or however the saying goes. And karma certainly presented itself in the form of Ji Changmin’s first ever TBZ beer pong tournament loss.

Hyunjae high fives you with a cheesy grin, lacing your fingers together and shaking them around. He presses a kiss to your temple and guides you away from the table as Juyeon and Younghoon clear it for the second round. It wasn’t odd for any of the TBZ boys to show you affection since you were like a sister to most of them, but this felt… kind of weird. You can’t pinpoint exactly why, but it made you feel off.

“You’re my secret weapon,” he laughs, hands burying into the pockets of his khaki shorts. “I’m gonna steal you as my partner permanently.”

As much as you joked around in your head, the truth of the matter was that you could never actually replace Changmin. In spite of him acting like a complete dumbass tonight, he was still your best friend. Not even the biggest of fights would change that fact.

Before you can dismiss him, Changmin is stalking over to you with a slight scowl. His nostrils flare a bit as he asks, “Can we talk?”

You barely nod and then he’s fisting the material of your top at the small of your back, urging you away from the living room. Your feet keep tripping over themselves while you attempt to match his pace but he’s too determined to reach his destination in mind to even notice. No one even bats an eye as you get ushered to your demise.

You’re coaxed into a nearby bathroom without a word, your best friend standing in front of you with his arms crossed over his chest. Because you hadn’t seen him a majority of the night, you hadn’t gotten the chance to get a good look at him. He was wearing a long sleeve striped polo and some baggy jeans, which probably would look basic on anyone else. But this is Ji Changmin. Girls flocked after him for a reason.

“Why would you play with Hyunjae? You know the type of guy he is. Now he thinks he has a shot with you or something.” As soon as he opens his mouth, you remember the type of guy he is.

“What does it matter to you? You were too busy giggling with your flavor of the week. Of course I wasn’t gonna wait around for you.” You bite back, mirroring his stance.

“Flavor of the—?” His eyebrows scrunch together in confusion and then everything settles in. “Oh.”

“Yeah,” you laugh humorlessly. “Don’t act all hypocritical with me, Changmin. I can’t believe I even came to this fucking party for you when you didn’t even bother giving me the same energy. Best friend, my ass.”

A scoff brushes past your lips and you turn to exit the bathroom, but he grabs your wrist. His grip isn’t too harsh, but it’s tight enough to stop you from going anywhere. “Wait. Don’t leave.”

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t.” Your eyes flick back and forth between his and the fingers wrapped around your forearm. And you know, you really should’ve predicted what would happen after that. The nature of your words were provocative in their own right, not to mention the tension brewing in the midst of your argument.

From one second to the next, Changmin’s mouth is on your own, your back pressed to the bathroom door. His hands are everywhere and nowhere all at once; digging into your sides, running through your hair, caressing your face. You feel insane. Your head feels empty, no coherent thoughts running through it as his lips move against yours.

They migrate along your jaw and down your neck, nipping and sucking wherever they feel fit. Everything is moving way too fast for you to comprehend what’s happening. His lips feel so good on your skin, you’re having trouble finding the strength in you to stop him. But you know you have to. This was your best friend, for god’s sake. And besides, you didn’t want to deal with the disappointment you’ve faced time and time again when it came to men. You couldn’t handle feeling that way toward him.

Your palm presses against his chest and you try your hardest to ignore the sensation of his heart thumping beneath it. Your eyes squeeze shut as you push him off of you gently. Not expecting the sudden disruption, he stumbles backwards slightly. He’s a little dazed, like he, too, has not a single thought in that brain of his.

“I can’t— we can’t—“ You’re breathless, heaving up and down as if you’d just ran a damn marathon. “I have to go.”

You don’t give Changmin any freedom to react, escaping the bathroom exasperated. There’s too much going through your mind to search for Soyeon, leaving the party as quickly as you can. The moment your foot steps out of the front door, it’s like you’re given some clarity. The fresh air feels cool on your warm skin while you take the walk back to your apartment, not in the mood to sit in a stuffy car with anyone else. You needed to think clearly and vulnerably, and someone being there would just hinder that.

But first, you had to figure out where to go from here.

It’s been a couple days since the last TBZ party and you were still avoiding Ji Changmin like he was the plague.

You were definitely wishful thinking when you decided to just ignore things until you had class together. And even then, you were planning on pretending like nothing even happened. Fucking up your friendship with him was something you couldn’t stand emotionally. Or physically. It would be akin to the pain of having your heart ripped straight from your chest.

Meeting Changmin when you did was almost like a blessing in disguise. His attitude about life was exactly what you needed coming into university. You were shy and scared of your new surroundings. You had no friends, you were far from your family, and your imposter syndrome was through the roof. But then he swooped in and made everything better somehow. As much as it was a snooze fest, you’ll eternally be a little bit grateful for sharing that First Year Seminar class with him.

Deep down, a piece of you has always belonged to Changmin. From that first day of freshman year to now, you’ve always held him to a different standard than everyone else. You liked to believe it was because he was your best friend, the one person who sought you out even when it felt like no one ever would. And until very recently, you kept trying to convince yourself that was the case.

If you slept together that might be worse. What if he ended up like every other guy you’ve landed in bed with? What if he couldn’t satisfy you? It would make it even more strained. You didn’t want to end up like every other girl who’s vied for his heart and failed miserably. He wasn’t a relationship person.

Falling for him alone would complicate everything. If he didn’t feel the same, it would be weird between you and your friendship would never go back to normal. Yet as you lay here, body bundled in your comforter and drowning in one of the many sweatshirts he’s left over at your apartment, scrolling through his feed, you realize that there’s no return from this point. Now that you’ve contemplated the idea, you’re too far in.

You know, the universe had funny ways of rewarding you. (Or rather, punishing you.)

There’s a knock at your front door. You’re not entirely sure who it could be since you weren’t expecting anyone, but one glance through the peephole and it’s all over for you. You consider stepping away, running and cowering in your bedroom until he disappears so you can go back to dissimulating that your entire life wasn’t crumbling to your feet.

“Y/N, I know you’re in there. Open up, please, we need to talk.”

You curse under your breath but unlock the door anyway, maneuvering so he can come inside with ease. Changmin stares at you with an unreadable expression for a minute, vision raking over your figure. Maybe you’re imagining it, but it’s something similar to how men have looked at you before, like they were undressing you with their eyes. That’s when you remember that you were wearing his sweatshirt.

Without pants underneath…

The wind knocks out of him in an instant, something primal coming over him when his gaze lands on you in his clothing. He knows he shouldn’t think about you the way he does. He shouldn’t think of how pretty you are when your pen is caught in your teeth, attempting to make sense of whatever your professor was talking about. He shouldn’t think of the way your cheeks flush when you’ve had too much alcohol at one of the TBZ parties. He shouldn’t think of kissing you, or pressing up against you like a dog in heat. He shouldn’t be thinking of the kiss you shared Friday night.

You’re his best friend, the one person in the world who has ever understood him. The one who’s always glued to his side even when he may be in the wrong. Why would he ever want something different? How could he ask for more when he should be thankful for what he was already given?

“Why are you pushing me away? Why are you ignoring me?” Is what he finally asks after the silence has become unbearable.

“Changmin,” you swallow thickly, hesitative with what you say next. “Friends don’t kiss— we don’t kiss.”

He takes a step forward, and then another, and then another until he’s only arms’ length from you. “But, we could.”

You release a shuddery breath, reaching out to stop him from coming any closer. “P-Please. We can’t do this— I can’t do this.”

“Why not?” He pushes. He knows he’s tiptoeing the edge of something else. There’s a fine line between what you have now, and what he’s wanted for so long. It’s always been a matter of if you wanted that too. “Is it because you just don’t want to?”

You’re not even sure how to respond to him. Of course you want this. It isn’t that you don’t want him. You’re more scared than anything. You’re scared of becoming just another victim of Ji Changmin’s charms, of giving into him and it leading to another let down. Your resistance is evident on your face, and you’re not all that taken aback when he sighs.

“I’ve wanted you since that first day of First Year Seminar, Y/N. No one has ever compared to you and no one ever will,” he confesses, a hand coming up to cup your cheek. “I sleep with random girls to get you off my mind, to forget that I’m pretty fucking in love with my best friend.”

Then it all clicks.

It’s like you’ve come to the biggest realization of your life, an epiphany striking you suddenly with the weight of a freight train. It all trickles into place, the reason why you’ve never enjoyed yourself during sex. The reason why you’ve never finished at the hands of any man you’ve been with intimately.

None of them were Ji Changmin. None of them were the best friend that your heart has belonged to since your freshman year.

You press your lips to his without any warning, nearly colliding into him with the force of your impatience. He reciprocates immediately, fingers tangling in your hair and holding you closer than physically possible. You tilt your head to deepen the kiss, tongue dragging along his lower lip. Years of repressed longing and pining find themselves surfacing in this one kiss.

Changmin’s hands travel to your waist, burrowing into the fabric of his sweatshirt as he yanks you toward the couch. He falls to a sitting position when the backs of his knees hit the edge, your knees resting on either side of his lap. You don’t break apart once, not even to gasp for air as he grinds you down onto him. Through the material of his cargos you can feel him. He’s just as throbbing as you are, your core pulsing with a need unlike any other.

His fingers reach for the hem of the sweatshirt and that’s when you pause him, your nerves getting the best of you. He frowns. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s just,” admitting this a second time isn’t easier. “I’ve never— nobody’s ever made me… you know…”

The corners of his lips curl up, thumbs rubbing the backs of your thighs. “You’ve never came before, baby?”

Your breathing stutters in your chest, the smugness of his voice sending shockwaves through your body. You should’ve fully expected him to be a master at pillowtalk, what with the whole Sex-God persona and all that jazz, but it still catches you off guard. You shake your head shyly, arms hooked around his neck. His mouth attaches to the spot behind your ear, sucking the skin tenderly.

“I’ll make sure you’re ruined for anyone else,” his voice is no louder than a whisper, but sounds deafening to the cotton stuffing the place where your brain should be. “I’ll make you feel so good, you won’t think twice about who you belong to.”

A small whine emits from your throat, hips gyrating themselves onto his crotch. He bucks up into you instinctively, keeping you still on his lap. The sheer possessiveness of his tone is driving you up the wall. That seemed to be something you had in common with each other. You’re lightheaded, too many layers of clothing blocking the space between you. Changmin connects your lips again, sliding his hands beneath the sweatshirt so his fingers can hook into the waistband of your panties.

He helps you out of them and your top, baring your entire body to him. The way his cock twitches makes him feel like a goddamn teenager. You paw at the zipper of his pants as he pulls off his t-shirt, tugging the cargos down his legs so you can kneel between them. If he thought he wasn’t going to last before, he’s certain of it now. He wraps your hair around his fist in a makeshift ponytail, watching you with hooded eyes as you kiss his tip.

“You look so gorgeous like this,” his voice is wavering, his composure drifting off.

That encourages you to take him into the wet heat of your mouth, tongue twirling around the tip. You run it along his slit, tasting the precum that had formed there. His head falls back onto the sofa cushions, jerking his hand back a bit and tugging your hair just enough for it to sting. You moan around his dick, the pain providing more pleasure than its intended purpose.

He bucks up into your mouth yet again, his length gliding down your throat. Not prepared for the intrusion, you gag, pulling off of his cock with a string of saliva bridging your lips to the tip. Tears prick at your eyes for a second, and then you’re going back in.

This time you manage to relax your throat, fitting more than you could prior. Changmin’s eyes are half lidded, not once daring to look anywhere that wasn’t you. The sight of you so eager to please, so desperate to reward him in spite of you being the one who’s never orgasmed before, was clouding his thinking.

The image of you on your knees, sucking him off like your life depended on it, would be burned into his brain for the rest of his life. (Not that he minded. You lived there practically rent free, anyways.)

Your attention stays on the tip of his cock, tongue repeatedly alternating with dragging under the head and the slit on top. He could die happily, actually, the fear that he may never have you in this way finally dissipating into thin air. Want could only take a man so far.

He doesn’t stay sentimental for very long, remembering that you were currently between his legs and the inner monologue could wait for later. Though, he makes the grave mistake of making direct eye contact with you and it’s game over after that point.

Changmin finishes with a groan, his cum painting your chest with milky white ropes. He cups both sides of your face, bringing you up to kiss you messily. He doesn’t care that he can taste himself in your mouth, nipping your bottom lip to pry it open. The two of you swap spots, with him now on the floor and you on the couch. He pushes up your knees, spreading them to gain access to your cunt, glistening with your slick.

He presses a soft kiss to your clit, glancing up at you through his lashes to gauge your reaction. He not only had a reputation to defend, but he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. He was going to be the first man to make you cum. But it wasn’t sufficient to just fuck you, he needed to do more than that. He needed to flood your senses and show you exactly what you’ve been missing out on.

His tongue circles around the sensitive bundle of nerves, his ring and middle fingers going counter-clockwise on your entrance. He can hear the laboring of your breathing, the sharp exhale through your nostrils when he experimentally slides one of them inside of you. He starts to pump it slowly, building up the pace until he adds the other finger, curling them.

You whine when Changmin’s lips envelope your clit, suckling like a man starved. His fingers south don’t halt their assault, the palm of his other hand flattening on your lower stomach. You reach down to card through his hair, clutching the strands for support. He groans against your pussy, the vibrations contributing to the knot growing tighter in your abdomen.

He switches his tongue and fingers a moment later, lapping at your hole and swiping at your clit in a close ovular pattern with his thumb. You’re dizzy, lids fluttering shut and back arching off the cushions in a weak attempt to minimize the space between you. Changmin pins down your hips with his forearm, continuing making out with your cunt.

He flips the stimulation once more, mouth on your clit and fingers buried deep inside of you in an instant. He keeps his eyes on you, focused on every scrunch of your face and slacking of your jaw. The sudden difference in sensations has a loud moan ripping from your vocal cords, that knot coming undone almost too quickly for it being your first time in this position. You feel his lips turn up in a smile, like he’s proud of himself for doing the impossible.

Changmin pulls back slightly, his fingers still working you down from your peak. When he thinks you’ve calmed, he’s up and kissing you, petting your hair gently. “You did so well for me, baby.”

“I’ve made myself cum so many times before, but never like that— holy shit, Changmin…” You’re a little stunned and he finds it cute, despite you both being in such a compromising situation.

“I need you to give me one more, is that okay?” He lays you on your back, hovering over you. “I wanna see your pretty face when you cum on my cock.”

You pull him down for another kiss, pecking the side of his neck with a hum. “Want you to fill me up, too.”

The groan that leaves him is guttural, his forehead falling onto your collarbone. Dreams really do come true. He hikes up one of your legs, lining himself up with you. He guides his cock into you and watches you for any moves of discomfort. A whimper bubbles past as he slips in, bottoming out smoothly. Half of you still couldn’t believe this was happening. No fucking way was Ji Changmin on top of you right now, dick compressed in your cunt to the hilt.

He holds your knee to your chest as he begins to thrust his hips, driving his cock deep from the get go. Each motion jostles you further up the sofa, but you’re too gone to care. Your eyes have started to roll to the back of your head and you already feel that pressure rising in the pit of your stomach.

At this rate, you’re not sure you’ll last very long. You’re still extremely sensitive from your first orgasm and Changmin’s plowing into you like he might never get the chance to do it again.

“You’re so— fuck— you’re so tight, baby… Squeezing me in like you don’t wanna let me go,” he rasps, trailing open mouthed kisses along your jaw and carrying them down your jugular.

You moan something about how deep he is, about how you can feel him everywhere. It’s too much. It’s not enough. And despite him giving you everything he has to offer, you crave more. You’re yearning for more.

Something in you snaps and you’re cradling his face in your hands. “Love you so much, Changmin. Wanna be with you forever.”

His eyes widen at your off-kilter confession, but he doesn’t cease once. If anything, his speed increases as he kisses you passionately, noses bumping but so far on the spectrum from the others. This one is more emotional, more meaningful. It’s not long before he’s spilling into you, moaning against your lips. You follow closely behind, your second orgasm cresting like a tidal wave.

You stay like that for a minute, both of you soaking it all in. Your chests meet in the middle with each breath you take.

Changmin pulls out of you carefully, laying so you can rest comfortably on top of him. A smile inches across his feature, like he was on the inside of a joke you weren’t. You raise an eyebrow at him.

“What…”

“Nothing, it’s just,” he brushes some of your hair from your forehead to leave a smooch there. “I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you how I felt for a while now. I just wanted to assure that you wouldn’t scream in my face and run the opposite direction. But you went ahead and beat me to it.”

“You meant what you said about the other girls?” You nibble at the skin of your cheek, nervous. “You slept with them to distract yourself from me? Even Iseul?”

He nods, albeit a little shamefully. “Not my proudest moment, I’ll say. I could’ve gone about it a million other ways. But yeah, I didn’t want to ruin what we had. I couldn’t stand the thought of losing you just because I couldn’t get my feelings in check.”

“You’re stupid,” you laugh, cuddling further into him. “It’s a good thing I’m kind of into that.”

“Kind of?” He quirks a brow at you. “I don’t know, you were saying something about loving me so much and wanting to be with me forever earlier…”

You smack his chest playfully. “Shut up. That was a moment of weakness or whatever.”

“It’s okay,” he smiles at you fondly, as if you were the reason that the sun shone so brightly. “I love you, too. And I wouldn’t mind being with you forever.”

© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.

[baby-yongbok]

Thinking about the way that Han would deal with you being needy in the middle of the night. How he'd roll over onto his side, eyes half lidded with sleep as he stares at you with a lazy smirk.

"Need me, princess?" The rasp of sleep coating his vocal cords sends a shock straight to your already sensitive clit.

He doesn't touch you right away. He allows the sweet sounds of your begging and the sight of you squirming and squeezing your thighs together to wake him up a bit more before he finally parts your legs, allowing the pads of his fingers to brush right against where you need him most.

"Such a needy baby, aren't you?" Your whines are music to his ears while he teases you. Toying with you just enough to get the reaction he wants, your hips bucking up into his hand desperately while your eyes are screwed shut makes him want to see more of you like this. How desperate can you get?

"How about this, Jagi..." You grab at his wrist as he pulls away from you, a lazy 'tsk' falls from his lips as he licks them. "How about I guide you? Let me teach you how to touch that pretty pussy just like I do, yeah?"

"B-but Ji, I just want you right now."

"You'll have my voice, that'll be enough for you, won't it?" He flashes you that smirk. The one that he uses when he's trying to convince you to do as he says, not that it'll take much convincing anyway.

"I want to see my princess fuck herself for me. You woke me up so I think that it's only fair that you do as I ask, don't you?"

You only offer a whine in response as Jisung props his head up on his hand, lazily watching you as you start to move your fingers back towards your dripping core.

"That's it, baby. Let's play."

(Unedited)

[rinanar]

FORGETFUL ! ONESHOT

─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─୨.･❀.･ৎ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─

character/s : 1st gen kings

type : oneshot — angst — NOT X READER

warning/s - details : death , suicide , (and gut wrenching angst I think)

a/n : chat am I cooked?🗣️🔥🔥🔥🔥

─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─୨.･❀.･ৎ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─

They all somehow forget that Seongji is gone.

Every time they want to drink, talk, anything— they mention inviting Seongji. Every time they're together, they'll think; "Huh, where's he?"

Then when they realize that he's gone, they go silent. It happens over and over again.

They just can't get him out of their minds. They don't know why. It's like Seongji is haunting them.

He's the reason why they're together, even until now.

It hurts them when they think that Seongji will get upset if they cut each other off because there's no reason for them to act buddy buddy with each other.

Whenever they see another person with an abnormal condition, they'll be like "Oh, Seongji also has something like that. It isn't that impressive."

They'll look at anything and somehow connect it to Seongji.

They're so nonchalant about it too. It doesn't show on their face that they care about him, that the gathering was just reluctant and it wasn't for Seongji, but they can't keep their eyes from stinging.

Their head hurts, they're starting to forget what Seongji's voice sounded like. Was it soft? Was it a little hoarse like when his sixth finger was cut off from that incident? Was his voice weak?

They wished they recorded all their conversation with him.

He was the sole reason why all of them were together. Seongji wants to tell them that he's happy he has the privilege to proudly tell others that he has friends.

It's not like anyone expected him to kill himself out of guilt. It wasn't his fault. Nothing happened.

But they didn't know that.

They wished they knew the reason why.

─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─୨.･❀.･ৎ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─

a/n : UGHHHHH IM CRYING SEONGJI COME BACK PLZ

[strayed-quokka]

babydoll || ji changmin || act ii

↳ Changmin isn’t popular nor is he rich, whereas you run on the other end of the spectrum, spoilt and living on your dads credit card. when you’re tasked with kicking him out of the biggest party of your year, you come to realise he’s not all that bad. unfortunately, falling in love with the ji changmin is your one way ticket to social suicide.

↳ pairing: ji changmin x female reader + ex lee juyeon x female reader

!!! this is not a love triangle !!!

~ rating: NC-17 minors please do not interact with this work

↳ genre: enemies to acquaintances to reluctant friends to lovers, slowburn, drama, angst, happy end but it takes a long ass time, rich girl broke ass uni boy

~ warnings: everyone still kinda sucks, juyeon is toxic and a red flag, manipulation, emotional abuse, toxic relationships, family abuse (implied, vaguely shown), bullying, reader is still a pain to deal with, alcohol, drug use, the classism is strong in this one still, implications of an eating disorder, body issues, body modifications (tongue and nipple piercings), changmin is basically a chainsmoker but we love him, minnie teaching ya'll and reader how to roll a cigarette, cocaine is common, so is imported wine, swearing, pet names (little doll, doll, darling, princess), whore and bitch, suicidal ideation, mild violence, first degree burns, taller reader with long hair, is anyone redeemable?

everyone is an adult in their 20s

!!! if I missed anything or I remember something else I will add it !!!

↳ words: 28,173

a/n: this is late. I apologise this shit is long as hell to edit and it broke tumblr and my computer.

I have said this previously but I will be stating this every chapter. There are some specific physical attributes to this reader which I usually avoid doing but for the story itself it was necessary.

Also, please note that the warnings are applicable to the chapter in question, not necessarily the whole story. You can find all the general warnings on the masterlist to babydoll. I also take no responsibility if you take issue with the topics and characters at hand once proceeding as I would hope you have read the warnings beforehand. If there is something I did genuinely miss in the warnings you are more than welcome to tell me though, since there is a lot and some might get overlooked.

let me know if you wanna be on the taglist and please I beg love up on this changmin he's taking all the strength I have and possess.

babydoll playlist || act i

You could go without hearing Changmin’s voice for the rest of your life. It’s not that it was an unattractive tone or that it was harsh, but it was the person behind it that immediately brought you to a halt. There was a very big part of you that almost knew what this was going to be about, and you were set on avoiding it. 

It was the very first time you didn’t stay to catch his attention. You walked away, heading down the stairs to the first floor in an attempt to shake him off. But Changmin was stubborn in his pursuit of you, especially today, and he persisted in running after you until he caught up and stood right in front of you to block your path. 

“Why am I wrapped up in a rumour that you want to fuck me?” 

It’s painfully embarrassing to hear those words from him. You’d expected it, given that in the past few days, the looks you’d received were ones that made you feel cornered, like prey being chased. Chanhee had even asked you, in a tone that sounded so judgemental that for a moment you thought he’d slipped into the opposing side. Juyeon’s side. 

Hyunjae had been worse. You’d deemed him a maybe friend, especially considering how he’d been standing up for you recently, but his tone, like he was amused and laughing at your massive fuck up and that it was somehow funny to him, had made you cold towards him. 

Younghoon was a nightmare. He’d grabbed your long hair by the roots and dragged you into an empty hallway to shame you. You’d embarrassed Juyeon and everyone knew about it. You fucked your ex boyfriend, used him for his money like a whore and then had the audacity to think about someone else.

It’s not like you had wanted to. 

It had been an honest mistake, a thought that fell away from you. 

Your social status had fallen to a new low. To a degree that had even Chanhee wary of speaking to you around others. You didn’t blame him, as you knew if it had been him, you’d likely cast him out much the same. See, that was the thing in both your circles, when it was all wealth and appearance and nothing of substance. Looks mattered, behaviour mattered, how awful you were to keep it perfect didn’t matter at all. 

You missed Chanhee but you didn’t beg for him. He spoke to you when he desired, asked if you were okay, even apologised once when you were alone, but the damage was done. 

Chanhee couldn’t fully understand it either. He knew you so well, he knew you’d never jeopardise yourself to this extent, so how were you possibly so stupid?

You straighten your posture but you’re more nervous than usual, hiding your palms underneath your hoodie as you fiddle with the sleeves. 

Yes, the same hoodie the man before you had returned perfectly new, wearing it like an oversized dress with heels that once again made you just a little taller, and right now, it reassured you. You were above him, both physically and in status, and that still remained true. He would never be better than you. 

“Says who?” 

You’re stoic and nonchalant in your behaviour, even ice cold as you try to keep all your expressions away from his prying eyes, but Changmin only raises his brows and leans against the wall in disbelief because he doesn’t believe it. You’re not sure why he doesn’t, anyone usually would, but he looks at you like you’re see through, like everything is laid out in front of him, like he knows you down to the bone and it makes you extremely uncomfortable to know that he’s analysing you for more than just your body. 

“Half the school is asking me why you moan my fucking name when some asshole fucks you and your concern is who?”

To be perfectly fair, both were of your concern. The fact that so many people approached a social outcast to ask him what the fuck you were doing, what you had done, all because Juyeon ran his mouth, just as much as who specifically had been the one to bring this to Changmin’s attention. 

“Juyeon?”

“No, though I hear he’s been riding out the emotionally torn up victim perfectly,” you almost laugh because you can imagine it so well. Juyeon’s ego had been bruised and he had to run around so that everyone would know about it, but you caught yourself by hiding the slight smile behind your hand. 

It wasn’t funny. 

“I really don’t care, you know? You can fantasise about me all you want. Is that why you kept my hoodie?”

He’d been so close. So close to making you take a step back, if even just for a minute to tell him it was okay. Because the reality, as much as you hated it, was that none of this was really Changmin’s fault, even if you wanted it to be. 

And then he went and ruined it, and it made you snap.

“You think I fucking like Juyeon going around telling people that I said someone else’s name when I fucked him?! Like you so graciously told me to?! 

“I didn’t-”

“Don’t you think I’m humiliated enough?! It’s so fucking embarassing that it had to be you,” and that’s when you break. The cruelty of your words aren’t lost on you, but the emotional torment and humiliation you feel is even worse. You don’t let yourself, but it happens almost on its own when you start to cry, and you never cry. 

Not like this, but the tears fall so freely that you couldn’t catch the droplets between your fingers even if you tried, and Changmin just stands there like an idiot. He stands there and you’re not sure if it’s because he’s amused in watching your vulnerability or because he genuinely feels bad, but either feel equally as bad at this point. 

You run away as a result, and this time it proves successful as Changmin doesn’t seem to be following you, so you keep going. You run all the way to your car and when the door closes you allow yourself to really break, because you feel like your life is ruined. You feel like everything you worked for, and everything that was so unbearably painful to work towards, was for nothing. People looked at you now and saw one thing. You were the one who hurt Juyeon, someone well loved, in a manner that is so utterly humiliating that anyone would say he deserved better. 

Juyeon was never the bad guy, and you just had no idea how to possibly spin it so that he could look to be the one who’d caused you more pain than you’d caused him. For the truth to your relationship had ran deep behind closed doors and you’d never let anyone in on it, and yet you slip up once and he lets the mask fall on who you are. 

At least, who you are in his eyes. 

You were sure now more than ever before that you and Juyeon were over, and it was like experiencing a break up all over again. It hurt, a lot, because there was once a time in which you would’ve said you maybe loved him. And the reality of him at the very least never caring to preserve your dignity and appearances when he knew how hard you worked for it and what you did to attain it, was a brutal reality that you simply did not want to face. 

Weeks go by and you’re sure your life has hit a wall that you’ll never get over. You felt dramatic, sure, but you were certain you could simply cease to exist and it wouldn’t really matter anymore. It wasn’t that you’d made any plans at your life. It was more so a feeling of if you faded away, would it even make a difference? 

You didn’t think it would. You’d let yourself sink to the status that Juyeon had asked for. You crashed, horrifically, falling so depressed that getting to class was a challenge, much less looking presentable. Your endless pairs of heels were replaced with trainers, ones you liked from dior but not nearly as graceful and elegant as what you usually had on, and you practically lived in hoodies that posed as dresses because they were just about long enough. 

You still wore make up, but it was far less intricate than before, and your hair was usually up in a high ponytail because you just wanted it out of your face, and you wanted to hide the fact that you barely had the energy to brush through it. 

Everything was tiring. Having everyone stare at you, treat you so far beneath yourself for something that had been no one's business was an awful, terrifyingly isolating feeling. You’d never been more aware of your appearance ever before as you were now, and yet you’d also never been as unenthused to fix it in your life. What was the point when the looks were the same. You were judged, beneath them. 

You’d sunk to Changmin’s status, and for the first time you wondered how he could do it. How was he able to brush almost anything off, to seem so unbothered, when he was being torn apart from all directions. You’d done it to him, but you’d seen others do it far worse, and yet he acted just the same. It was something you wished you knew how to mirror, for maybe then it would at least earn you some respect back where he couldn’t, because he lacked the privilege you had. 

Chanhee had brought you a coffee in the morning, your absolute favourite order and therefore you knew how expensive it was. A mix of extra shots of coffee and syrup, but it was refreshing and made you smile as he kissed the top of your head. You appreciated it more than he probably knew, because Chanhee hadn’t been around you much in recent weeks. Ever since it happened, you wouldn’t call it distance, but more missed chances to cross each other and neither of you made an effort to fix it. 

Normally, Chanhee loved to pry. He wanted all the dirt and tea he could get out of you, but it’s like he knew to not cross this line, and the end result was distance. It was ironic, really, because you could’ve really used someone to talk to. For someone to ask with a non judgemental tone what the actual fuck had happened. 

Even if in truth you didn’t fully know either where the hell you had gone wrong. 

Changmin had tried to talk to you one more time but you’d turned him away. It’s like he’d chosen the worst moment, exactly when Hyunjae and Juyeon turned the hallway towards you both, and if you had even considered staying for a bit to hear what he had to say, it all went out the window as they showed up. You turned so fast to run that the three of them would likely fail to catch you. 

Juyeon had somehow managed to spread more rumours, because the kicked little kitten had seen you with the very man you’d thought of. It felt ridiculous, even pathetic, the way he was dragging it, and yet the way you knew to stand up for yourself was entirely lost on you. You forgot to speak, forgot how to be firmly yourself with your thoughts to tell them all to go to hell. You forgot how to exist in yourself.

You went home that day and saw Changmin’s dark hoodie laying on the edge of your bed where you’d left it in the morning, and you decided you’d had enough. You weren’t a weak person, and you were letting yourself be walked over and dragged with the name of someone you didn’t even like. Why the hell would you stand for it, like he was worth more than you? 

It was five in the morning when you got ready for your lecture three hours away. You dragged yourself into your shower, your little cat watching you with peculiar eyes because you were never up this early. She knew that, so she found it rather odd and just sat there perched curiously on the counter where all your makeup was messily strewn about for someone else to clean. 

Changmin might’ve forgotten about the hoodie entirely, accepting defeat and transferring ownership, but you wanted to cut any and all strings with him. You wanted to have no part of you be intertwined with him, no association or ties that meant you even knew each other. 

And you would do it looking absolutely stunning. 

Your dress sits so tight it threatens to hurt you, but it forms around your body well and the length is just enough to be acceptable if you tape it to your thigh before it rises above your ass. Not class appropriate, but its never bothered you before. 

You decide to wear one of your three red bottom heels, the highest ones you own, the colour black to go with the same coloured dress, paired with your silver jewellery. The ridiculous hoodie in your hand ruins the entire aesthetic, but at least you’d be rid of it soon. 

When your driver drops you off at school, you make the not so unusual albeit stupid decision to cut a line of cocaine on a small piece of decorated glass that you keep in the car to break and distribute the powder into lines, because you’re tired as hell and have to withstand a lot of stares today. That, and you would willingly go looking for Changmin, his piece of clothing hidden away, folded neatly and delicately in a discarded designer shopping bag from one of your many expensive trips on your exes dime. 

Maybe you needed a cigarette. A bottle of wine wouldn’t hurt either.

“You look very nice today,” it was a careful voice, Hyunjae, but you frowned when you turned to look at him. He was alone, well dressed with a cologne you couldn’t recognise, rare in your case, but nice. It wasn’t overbearing, and it mirrored the man in front of you quite well. 

“Since when do you take the time to give me a compliment?”

“I just think you look nice,” he sounds honest and sincere, which in truth you do believe he means. You don’t think he’s carelessly choosing to say words to make you feel better, but it still doesn’t sit well with you, so you smile at him gently and touch his shoulder to squeeze it and ask for his attention.

“Well don’t, Jae,” he lets you leave, and you’re determined more than anything to find the man you wish to blame everything on. There’s a bounce to your step, wide awake now as the drug infiltrates your bloodstream, and you’re almost a little excited to get it all over with. 

You’re even more excited at the prospect of dragging Juyeon down beneath you, but that was for later.

You’d just about given up on finding Changmin when after your final class, the library proved successful in your search. However, it also proved to be a mistake. You’re not sure what the reason is, but seeing Changmin makes you stop. You hit that familiar wall, except now it's a dam and it’s threatening to break. And if it breaks, so do you. 

You’re emotionally charged in a way you don’t want to be, simply because you see him standing there, reaching for a book dressed in a simple t-shirt with his glasses perched over his nose that looks almost crafted from the side at which you're standing. It hits you suddenly, that you find Changmin to be physically beautiful. Even when he isn’t well dressed, there is a simplicity to him that is welcoming, and it makes you want to turn away. 

He notices you, probably because a shadow loomed to his side and he was notified of your presence because you simply stood there. He’s carrying three books, and you wonder what they are, but then he moves towards you with a confused stare that has you thinking you couldn’t do this. 

“Is there something on my face?”

His voice breaks you free from your mind in which you are a prisoner, or at least feel like one with your overwhelming thoughts that you simply never wish to have. Everything seems so easy for him, talking to you seems simple, and you’re wondering why you can’t formulate words to return it when it shouldn’t require any effort at all. 

“I have your hoodie,” you keep your voice low just in case, but he hears it and seems to curiously perk up at the prospect of getting his clothes back. 

“Oh? I figured you were keeping that,” honestly, so did you. You’d really wanted to, because it was still insanely comfortable to you. You loved it, in truth, for the way it wrapped around you felt soft, like you were nestled up in something that wouldn’t hurt your skin and never sat too tight just to form your body a certain way. 

“I don’t want anything that ties me to you,” you wonder if it stings, when you insult him like this, but he makes no face that tells you it does. He’s perfect at hiding how he feels, and you nearly wish to ask him how he does it. How does he remain so okay, when things so cruel and hurtful are thrown his way? 

You wish to emulate it, even in this moment, but you can’t. 

It’s the one part of him you wished you could learn to take for yourself.

“Are you okay?” 

Those three words hit you like a knife straight through your chest, reverberating deep in your bones as your entire resolve breaks. Your walls fall apart yet again and he’s the one to do it, because in truth you aren’t and he’s the only one to even ask the questions in weeks apart from Chanhee. People you consider your friends, or would consider anything at this point that Changmin isn’t, haven’t even asked, and yet he stands before you and doesn’t even seem to stumble over the words to pose the question. 

And it makes you cry. 

It’s absolutely humiliating to cry like this and the mascara burns your eyes in an instant, and yet every effort to stop forsakes you because it all makes it worse. Changmin stands there so awkwardly, like he might have ways to comfort someone but no ways of knowing how to comfort you, and you’re fairly certain he wishes to turn away because he finds it uncomfortable to simply stand here with you, in a corner, far from others yet not far enough that no one could see if they didn’t go to look

“I… listen… I really didn’t mean to make you cry,” you can tell he doesn’t like it. Maybe because it’s you or he’s uneasy by it in general, but it fills you up with even more embarrassment as you try to will your body to walk away. Yet you’ve turned to stone, accepting your humiliation because how much lower could you go before his eyes? You’ve broken entirely and he’s witnessed almost every second of your demise as you became nothing of value to absolutely everyone around you. You really were like a whore.

“Can you just t-take it?” 

Forcing the bag into his fingers doesn’t work, and you note for the first time the silver rings he wears. You’re surprised you missed it before, or maybe he wasn’t always wearing them, but they’re intricate in their simplicity and you wish to have a closer look, though you wouldn’t be the one to ask. 

“Listen… I know you have some pathetically unjustified hatred towards me-” you scoff, only to prove his point that has him rolling his dark brown eyes because he’s exasperated that you simply can’t let him finish, “I also find you incredibly fucking annoying and a raging bitch-”

“Hey!” 

You want to hit him, yet you’re not going to disagree with him. You know how to hurt people well, how to manipulate a situation and how to come out on top above everyone else and so it earned you occasionally negative titles that were sometimes deserved. 

Nevertheless you weren’t quite sure what he was getting at. 

“Do you want to get some ice cream?”

Whatever it was, it hadn’t been that. You hadn’t expected to be asked to go anywhere with him, and yet here you both were, in a position of vulnerability for him and one even more for you. You were conflicted and uncertain in what you’re answer should be, because even if your first thought was to say no and reject him, it wasn’t what you truly wanted. 

“What?”

“Ice cream makes anything better. Don’t you think?” 

Well, no, you didn’t think so, for it added weight where you didn’t need it, and yet you didn’t want to turn him away. You were upset, evidently, and he was trying to do something to bring a smile to your lips and you hated that it felt like it was working. It shouldn’t be working, and yet you were heavily considering it. 

“Fine, but I don’t need us to leave together.”

“I have another class, anyway,” but the way he spoke made you wonder if he’d been willing to skip it, if you’d immediately said yes to something you’d never thought you’d hear him ask. He almost seemed bitter but you weren’t quite able to feel bad. 

But you wouldn’t mind ice cream, if you were honest.

“I can meet you there,” Changmin seems surprised, perking up in a way that is strangely endearing yet you refuse a smile, waiting for him to tell you where to go. 

“It's just a ten minute walk from here. Amorino, I think.”

You’d heard of it, but in truth you’d never been, but it was meant to be good for the little it cost, so maybe it was worth a try. 

“Fine. I’ll be there,” you’d get some of your assignments done, maybe, but first you’d need to spend the next hour in front of a mirror so that you didn’t look like an absolute mess, even when you felt like one. Changmin looked like he wanted to say something else, but he bit his tongue and walked away from you with your hands still firmly latched around the strap of your shopping bag. You wondered if he’d intentionally left it in your grasp, if there was a reason he was no longer so hellbent on getting it back, but you weren’t going to dwell on it. 

And you were not keeping it any longer either. If anything, you’d blame your willingness and brief vulnerability to say yes on the fact that you simply just wanted to be rid of him, and that included the item you were holding. 

You almost wished the rain had put him off from walking through the glass doors that led inside a sickly sweet smelling cafe, slightly cool because of the various ice cream needing the lower temperature. Sadly, it hadn’t, and Changmin walked in just a little over an hour after you had taken a seat in a corner far inside the shop, hoping that if anyone you knew would walk past, they wouldn’t recognise you. When he spots you, he seems almost as apprehensive as you to approach, brushing through his matted down wet strands of dark hair to move them away from his forehead. 

“I’m surprised you’re here,” it seems true. Like he hadn’t expected you to really show up and in truth it seemed like the most reasonable assumption to make, because you really had no idea either. 

“Me too,” he smiles at you and it makes you uncomfortable, for the shift in the way he treated you seemed disingenuous, yet nothing about it told you that his kindness in looking at you wasn’t real. It’s like you’d genuinely managed to amuse him with little to no effort, after the countless times in which you were a pain in his ass. 

“Do you know which flavour you’d like?”

“I… honestly can’t decide,” it all sounded heavenly. You couldn’t remember when you’d last indulged in a sweet treat like this, even if it hadn’t been intentional to go so long without. It just never came to be for a very long time and suddenly you were overwhelmed with flavours that you wanted to try. You could’ve eaten half the menu, and yet you barely desired one in terms of calories.

“I think you can choose up to three for one cone,” three seemed absurd. It seemed excessive and yet the temptation to try three was so overbearing that you wanted to give in.

“Are you having three?”

“Probably,” you nod, falling silent because you really don’t know how to talk to him normally. Changmin was a stranger to you, and you fully realise it when you sit across from him and realise that you don’t know him at all. You don’t know who he is, how he thinks, aside from what he tells you, and the only other thing you know is what he looks like, and that he often adjusts his glasses as if they sit just a little too big. 

“I can order for us both,” he offers, breaking you out of your trance to once again be reminded of how strange this is. You don’t like Changmin, yet sitting with him like this is simple. It’s weird, but it’s easier than expected. It’s very awkward, but it’s simple. 

“You don’t have to order for me.”

“It was an offer, not a demand,” you roll your eyes, though his kindness isn’t lost on you and you’re once again sat here wondering what you’re really doing, and wondering why Changmin’s shift in personality was so sudden but genuine. 

“Stracciatella, dulce de leche and coffee.”

“I can tell you’re rich,” you wonder if it’s an insult, but if it is he’s smiling and that almost makes it worse. You know how to do it best, smile through something you didn’t mean, or something that was an insult but you wanted the other person to maybe have hope that it wasn’t meant that way. Or maybe he was joking, and the slight tease just went way over your head. 

“What’re you think?” 

“Vanilla, lemon and amarena,” you nod, as if to just tell him you were listening but have nothing to say. 

“But I’m the rich one,” it’s your way of figuring out if he was teasing too, by doing so back and seeing what his reaction will be. Changmin seems amused and you relax in knowing that he wasn’t mocking you. 

“What’s wrong with those flavours?”

“Nothing,” you draw out, staring back at the menu to decide on a coffee, “I’ll get a drink.”

Changmin seems to hesitate just briefly and realisation dawns on you. You’ve always looked down on him for having less money, for not affording things, but it didn’t cross your mind that he might not even be able to afford this. The issue then became that you had no idea how to delicately approach it. 

“I’ll pay for it,” you tell him, but there’s surprise on his face and a hint of frustration, and you wonder if you read it all wrong. 

“I’m not in poverty, you do know that, right?”

Honestly, you didn’t. It might’ve been embarrassing to admit but you weren’t quite sure at what point someone was considered within poverty because very often, your parents had shown you that even the most common ordinary people lacked money and therefore weren’t content in life. You had no real way of measuring what was really considered little. Hell, you barely knew what your family had in regards to wealth, because you rarely looked at the money you spent. You knew you always had it, so you spent it, without having to think about it. 

In your mind, anyone that had to consider their spending was poor. 

Sat here now with Changmin was probably the first moment in which you briefly think that might’ve been wrong. That maybe he was cautious with money but not without it. If he was without it, he would likely not be as inviting to sit with and dressed the way he was, even if you’d never buy clothes like the ones he wore. 

“I’d still like to pay,” you offer, and you’re not really sure why. You’re here to give him this stupid bag that’s been weighing down on your mind all day as you chased after him, and maybe you’re also hoping to buy his silence on the fact that you cried before him and have done so twice now. 

“I invited you here,” he was right. Usually, at least how you were raised, the one inviting the other is the one to pay unless otherwise agreed, which had never been the case for you before, yet it was now. 

“And I’m telling you to let me pay.”

“You’re really demanding you know?”

You knew. It’s how you got what you wanted, to make demands rather than ask questions. Changmin seems displeased but he doesn’t argue with you, shrugging his jacket off to drape it over the chair before he gets up and waits. 

“What?” 

“You’re not coming with?”

“Just take my card. Three, five, seven, two,” you hold it out to him between your long manicured nails and he looks at you like you’re insane. It’s another reminder of how different you two are, of how giving him access to sums he’s never even seen or hoped to dream of meant absolutely nothing to you, because it really didn’t.

“Thanks?”

Changmin walks away, but it’s only brief before he’s turned back around to approach you, “which coffee did you want?”

“A latte macchiato,” he nods, leaving you alone with your thoughts again as you watch his back. The weather has since gotten worse, but it’s quite cosy from here, to simply watch the rain fall, the droplets chasing after one another from top to bottom, only to repeat over and over again in different patterns. The heating was on too, and it was quite comfortable to simply sit here. 

The girl at the counter smiles at Changmin in a way that makes you want to turn away, not because someone flirting with him bothers you, but because you can’t believe how ridiculous she’s being in doing so. He’s here with you, and she’s practically begging for it. 

Whatever she says, he seems polite but distant enough for her to straighten her posture and adjust her smile to a more professional one, and so you take that as a rejection on his part. You’re not sure why you find that so satisfying, that she didn’t get her way, but you’re happy about it regardless as he’s handed two ice cream cones that seem far more intricate than you’d expected. 

It’s only when he comes closer that you realise that the ice cream has been layered together to form the shape of multiple rose petals and ultimately a flower, three separately assorted colours that make up the flavours you asked for, “they’re still making the coffees.”

“Thanks,” you take the ice cream from him carefully, admiring its shape and look. It’s beautiful, really, and it does put a gentle smile on your face as you manage a little laugh in amusement, “it’s pretty.”

You wonder if Changmin knew how they put the ice cream together. If maybe he suggested this place because he figured something as simple as an ice cream shaped like beautiful petals belonging to a rose would cheer you up or make you feel better for the absolute mess that had become your life. For the emotional turmoil you felt as you fell in importance and high regard in others’ eyes. 

You mattered less to almost everyone you knew and it bothered you greatly.

Both of you fall silent, likely because neither of you have anything to say. There’s nothing to talk about, not between the two of you, and there’s no attempt at changing it either. Neither of you want to become friends, and yet here you both sit being friendly. 

How strange the world worked sometimes.

“I’m sorry Juyeon’s such a dick to you,” it takes you by complete surprise to hear him speak, and whilst normally you’d find yourself frustrated to hear him even bring it up again, it’s oddly comforting to hear an opinion you agree with, albeit planned to have kept from Changmin. You want him to believe that things are perfect, that you and Juyeon are perfect, because you hold on to the false belief that maybe it would be. 

“Juyeon’s just… a guy, I guess.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” you wonder why he says it. If he’s trying to tell you he’s better than Juyeon and if so, why it would matter. You have no interest in him and never would, so there was no need for Changmin to make himself better than the man you somehow spent still loving, despite all his horrifying flaws.

And there were many of them, and yet you still saw it with rose tinted glasses. Whilst aware of it, it mattered less to you. 

“I don’t plan to ever have sex with you if-“

“That wasn’t an invitation,” again, your eyes roll almost instantly. He’s too good at being frustrating, and he sits there with his body leaned forward like he’s engaged in you while he takes a bite of his ice cream. 

A bite.

“You’re insane. Why do you bite it?”

“It’s food?”

“It’s cold.”

“Why would I want to just lick it? I barely get any ice cream and then it melts.”

You watch as he bites into another petal and you push your body up a little to see what flavour it might’ve been. 

“Vanilla,” he answers and you nod, sitting back with your one leg crossed over the other.

“Isn’t vanilla a little plain?”

“Is that a double entendre?”

It’s so easy to give up when the conversation is so static, so forced because you truly have nothing to talk about. What the hell do you both even have in common?

“I have a cat,” Changmin laughs and it’s a little unexpected, his smile so light and his dimples set deep in his cheeks. It’s an inviting smile, warm, and his tone of laughter is unique and suits him. There’s a childlike amusement to his features as he looks down at the table. 

“I also have a cat,” you were curious to see her, or him, but you didn’t really want to ask. Both of you sharing photos of your pets over ice cream and coffee was a little bit too friendly, but you supposed there was now something you had in common, “but I don’t really like cats.”

Nevermind.

“Then why do you have one?”

He thinks, just for a minute as he drinks some of his coffee that had been brought over just a few short minutes before, and you must say now you really want to know why he has a pet he doesn’t even like. 

“I found him on the streets. He was put in a box and it was raining. Wasn’t going to take him first because I didn’t want one. But when I went to call someone in the shop nearby, he’d somehow jumped out of the box and started to follow me. He just wouldn’t leave.”

It was unexpectedly sweet and very much something you would’ve never considered. Of course your cat was store bought, expensive and from a litter from a breeder that had done this for the past decade or two. Getting a cat of the streets, even if unintentionally was so out of your character, but you knew when to admit you found it to be kind of Changmin to have done so. 

“You kept him?”

“I did. He’s very sweet.”

“Chanhee says my cat is a diva.”

“So she takes after you. Figures,” you could hit him, but you bite your tongue and try a new flavour of the ice cream petals. Coffee. Definitely. 

The conversation dies again when it would be so easy to keep it going, but it’s like neither of you have any desire to do so. And yet, you find yourself far more at ease sitting here than you would’ve thought when you first agreed to it. You didn’t feel like you had to make up the silence that you both shared.

He seemed to share the same thoughts, though he didn’t often share eye contact with you. You weren’t sure if he was hesitant to or maybe he just didn’t want to look at you, but previous times you’d met him, he’d always been good at looking you in the eye. It was a little strange that he seemed to look everywhere else but at you now, unless you spoke. 

“You smoke, right?” Painful. These occasional conversations littered into being sat here were just simply weird, but you watch as he grabs a bag of loose tobacco out of his jacket as well as some rolling paper and a filter. 

“Didn’t you smoke straights last time?”

“You remember?”

Fuck. 

“I didn’t forget you offering me one,” he shrugs and you watch as he distributes the tobacco onto the paper carefully between his jewellery adorned fingers. It was distracting and you could curse again for it, because he was doing it all effortlessly with one hand. 

“You want one now?” 

“I can do it…” he seems to hesitate though ultimately pushes the bag of tobacco over to your end of the table, and you fiddle with the cone of your ice cream between your one hand whilst figuring out how to do this with the other. Actually, how the fuck had Changmin done this? 

“How did you-”

“Put it on the table first. You can roll with one hand,” he was definitely more confident in your abilities than you were, and maybe that was sweet but it was also giving you far more credit than you deserved. 

You didn’t even want to admit that you couldn’t roll a cigarette at all. You always bought straights, the times you bought any at all. Doing it yourself seemed like extra effort for not much pay off. 

You try to mirror Changmin, seeing how much tobacco he used and loosening up the dried leaves between your fingers the way he had done as they all clung together in the bag, then adding a generous amount to the paper you’d taken out of its flat packaging. 

“Do you always smoke American spirit?”

“I tend to. Or marlboro. Why?”

You shrug, going back to what you’re doing but you very quickly realise you’ll need both hands. Watching him do it, pushing and pinching the thin paper together to tighten the tobacco with two fingers, maybe three at best, was ridiculous. 

“Do you want me to hold your ice cream?”

At this point, you’re determined to prove both him and you that you can do this, when you know the reality is you can’t. Changmin doesn’t know that though, and how hard could it be to roll a cigarette, really?

“You can have it.”

“You have more than half left,” he frowns, putting his nearly rolled cigarette down on the table as he holds your ice cream, watching you and the way your fingers take both ends of the paper to pinch it together, “is it not good?”

“It’s nice. It’s not the flavour,” hopefully, he knows to drop the conversation. Though you look up and can tell by his expression that he likely wants to keep asking but you don’t see why you should need to justify it. 

“You need to… no… you have too much,” he sighs, wanting to reach over but both his hands are occupied with both of your ice cream cones and so he can only sit trapped wishing to intervene as you try to make adjustments when he complains with no real instructions as to how you can do it better, “you’ve never done this before.”

“So I’ve been caught,” as if one of the cafe staff had noticed him struggling, they bring over a holder for two ice cream cones that are scattered on a few tables, yours not having been one of them. 

“Thank you,” he redirects his attention to you, hands free, “look, I’ll teach you,” you scoff, crossing your arms as you’ve let go of the damaged bundle of tobacco in a scrunched up paper, looking between its state and back up at Changmin. You didn’t want him to teach you anything, because you didn’t think he had anything worth showing you. Yet at the same time, you didn’t enjoy not knowing how to do something, and if he was willingly prepared to show you how to actually do it, maybe you shouldn’t deny him. 

“I don’t really smoke…” 

“I won’t encourage you to,” he grabs another rolling paper, holding it out to you and you hesitate but ultimately take it between your fingers as he does the same, ignoring his near finished cigarette to start over, “but I smoke a lot, so I’ll take it off your hands if you don’t want it.”

“You’ll get cancer,” you’re disgusted but you don’t have much of a right to be. You smoke too and do far worse things. Every party could bring you to the brink of death if you aren’t careful enough with what you’re using, and yet you’re telling him he’s risking his life. 

“Thanks, the packaging hadn’t told me,” you recognise Changmin’s sarcastic tone well by now, given that it’s the tone he mostly spoke to you in, but you also don’t retaliate this time. You had nothing to say, nothing to add that wouldn’t be another circular back and forth of neither of you ever getting to the point or settling a fight. 

“The tobacco is quite tight, so you’ll have to loosen it with your fingers a little before you put it on the paper.”

“What about the filter?”

“It’s harder to roll with a filter. Try without first,” but you’re stubborn, and you grab a filter and bring it to one edge of the rolling paper before he can take it away from you. Sighing, he relents and grabs one too to demonstrate more accurately. 

“You’re ridiculous,”

“And I won’t be caught dead smoking a non filtered cigarette.”

“You should try it. The nicotine high is amazing,” okay, so maybe you’d reconsider. You’d never thought of it, even if it was obvious, “you’re curious now.”

“I might be,” Changmin smiles and your cheeks feel a little warmer, but surely it’s the warm coffee and the indoor heating and not the fact that he looked at you with eyes that were gentle, like his happiness in showing you something wasn’t structured into an act of false behaviour.

Then you wonder why it makes any difference. If he wasn’t being genuine, did it matter?

He leans back over and slips the filter away from your paper, then adjusts and sits up a little straighter before his body moves back into your space to be a little closer to demonstrate. 

“So, you loosen some of the tobacco between your fingers. This one is quite dry- and then you bring it onto the paper like so,” you follow his lead, though you could’ve managed this part on your own. This was the one part you’d done correctly without his help, “you want it to be pretty even but don’t worry about it not being perfect.”

“It has to be perfect,” he sighs, his head rolling down in defeat before he slowly looks back up at you. 

“Perfection is an unattainable fantasy. Now take your fingers and move them to either edge and pinch while rolling it like so.”

You follow his lead though if you’re entirely honest, you have no idea how he makes it look so easy and effortless. His tobacco bunches together into a beautiful neat line perfectly, whilst yours is a disaster in which it falls or thins out too much on one end. It feels awkward and incorrect, the way you do it, and yet you’re following his exact instructions. 

“You’re terrible at this.”

“Or you suck at teaching,” giving up was tempting, but showing Changmin defeat wasn’t an option. You wanted to get this, no matter how awful the end outcome would be. 

“You have the ends. Move your fingers more into the middle to roll.”

“It doesn’t work like that!”

He looks exasperated, his glasses moving slightly as he raises his brows and huffs out in annoyance at your inability to do something he deemed simple, “you’re just bad at this. That’s okay.”

“Absolutely not. I’m not bad at things.”

“Just roll the paper over once you have the right shape. Wet the end and seal it and then you can tap the end against the table,” he shows you how, but he does it so quickly you barely manage to follow his movements. He’s amazing at it, you do have to admit, but you hate him for it because you want to be better. It’s irrational, because how realistic is it for you to be better at rolling a cigarette when you’d never done it before, when Changmin had probably done it for years?

“It’s not tight like yours though.”

“Just try. You have the movement right,” but it doesn’t feel right. It feels awkward and you might just blame it on your acrylics for not managing, but the end result is so pathetic that you’re surprise the cigarette even holds. 

“It’s… a cigarette.”

“I’m not smoking that,” Changmin doesn’t seem surprised, but he does surprise you when he places his perfectly rolled cigarette right before you and takes yours instead, placing it behind his ear before retrieving his jacket and taking his melting ice cream, “you coming?”

Well, you suppose you were now. 

You grab the bag with his hoodie in one hand, Changmin’s cigarette in the other as you follow him outside, leaving your ice cream to melt before it’s thrown away. It’s not unnoticed by him either, and he turns around to grab it between his fingers, “if you won’t have it, I will. You’re wasting money and good ice cream.”

“I’m watching my figure.”

“Why?”

He holds both cones in one hand with their remnants of sweet gelato, placing his cigarette between his lips and lighting it with one hand turned away from the storm and rain. The shop has an overhang to shield you both from direct downpour, but lighters are stubborn with wind and he seems to know it well. 

His one worded question seems strange. It’s not worried, nor is it judgemental. At least you don’t perceive it to be. It’s simply confused, like he’s genuinely surprised that you would even bother at all. 

“Because I want to be thin.”

Changmin wants to say something. You can tell he does, that there’s something right on his lips yet he doesn’t speak it. He resists words he probably knows you really don’t want to hear. He would be right, because any comments about your body aren’t welcomed unless they’re compliments that remind you of what you’ve worked for. All the times you don’t eat are rewarded with the acknowledgement of it. 

“Here,” he holds out his lighter, the flame igniting right by your lips in which the cigarette is perched carefully, and you lean in enough and inhale so that it burns. 

“Thanks.”

“You really are peculiar,” you don’t see how you are. From your point of view, he’s the abnormal one. He dresses cheap despite the school he attends, he doesn’t socialise, and he seems so ignorant to his surroundings and the importance of appearance, “I have to go.”

It takes you by surprise. Your thoughts had been so tangled and convoluted that you hadn’t seen him take his phone out, much less fumble with the ice cream, his cigarette and the device to answer whoever it was. 

You wondered who it was. 

“Who is it?”

You can’t help it. Call it morbid curiosity, even in regards to Changmin of all people, “I completely forgot I have a date.”

The thought of anyone going out with Changmin was a concept you weren’t ready to wrap your head around, but maybe if it was a girl he’d met online, she’d based it merely on appearance and even you wouldn’t fully be able to say that he was ugly. You knew he wasn’t, as much as it pained you to admit he was actually rather beautiful when he didn’t open his mouth. 

“Is she cute?”

“She’s cute, yeah,” but he doesn’t seem excited. It almost feels like an insult to hear how he speaks about the prospect of his date. Were all men like this?

Had Juyeon been so disinterested when he first dated you?

“You’re going dressed like this?”

“What’s wrong with it?” 

Boy, he really wasn’t trying. It felt near cruel, because you were almost certain that the girl would be beautiful, and even if her physical appearance wasn’t as gorgeous, she would make up for it in every way with the way she chose to dress. 

And Changmin was in casual attire, his hair had fallen to his face and he seemed tired. 

“Poor girl.”

“It’s really not your business,” and then he discards his cigarette and grabs the bag you’d been holding without warning, practically ripping it out of your hand and the movement feels more aggressive than you’re used to from him. His tone could be harsh but his actions never were, and so it surprised you when he didn’t even ask to take it. 

“Thank you for the hoodie.”

He doesn’t sound thankful at all. Changmin sounds annoyed, as he throws the little remnants of ice cream cone with next to no ice cream left, in the trash he passes as he walks away from you. You stand there, empty handed aside from the cigarette that was burning but barely smoked, and you honestly feel lost. You’re strangely confused and unsure, and you really don’t quite know why.

You felt like maybe you’d managed to really get under his skin, and if that were the case, you were sure it was the first time you’d ever managed it. Yet you’d expected it to feel different, to frustrate him enough to show true emotion in his anger and discontent towards you. 

Instead it just felt like nothing.

You’re not sure what to make of Changmin. But you had bought a packet of loose tobacco and pink rolling paper to fiddle with in the comfort of your large bedroom. You were near naked, just out of your shower and only in underwear whilst you fiddled around with the cigarette in your hand. It was fucking difficult, and you’d probably gone through ten different videos on youtube teaching you how to do it. At least trying to, and each time you just failed to fully do it right. 

Juyeon had called you and while you’d originally wanted to pick up and even thought to, by the time you made any attempt to move your hands, he’d already hung up.

Chanhee had also called though and you had picked up, asking how he was though he pushed for you to answer first, and you hadn’t known what to say. You felt fine yet simultaneously you felt strangely numb. It wasn’t that you didn’t care, it’s that Juyeon had worn you down. He’d broken something in you and collecting the pieces wasn’t possible because not all parts still existed. 

Convincing yourself that it was over was difficult when Juyeon was right there to call back. 

You wanted to. 

It takes about ten failed attempts at rolling a cigarette before you manage one that’s just decent enough to smoke, and in your mind you wish to share your success with Changmin, since he was the one that had witnessed your inability to do it in the first place. You wanted to prove a point, as petty and unimportant as it was. You could roll a damn cigarette. 

But you’d rather roll over in your grave than ask anyone for his phone number. If anyone even had it. He’d said he was supervising a friend the night you first really spoke to him but you’d yet to see him talking with anyone at all. Who was Changmin friends with, if anyone at all?

The question dwelled on you curiously. You didn’t think he’d lied to you that night, you had to at least give him the benefit of his annoying ability to always speak what you assumed to be his truth. He didn’t care of the consequence or if it hurt, and you supposed maybe that was where your one similarity lay. 

If you hurt someone, it didn’t really matter as long as it made you look good.

“Dear? Could I come in?” 

Your mother being home was unexpected. Her knocking on your bedroom door to ask if she could come in was even stranger. It made you worry, and you quickly discarded all your rolled cigarettes in a drawer as well as any other damning evidence aside from the one now considered a masterpiece to show off. You placed it behind your ear and straightened your posture, “yeah?”

“You need to draw the curtains,” she criticised, walking over to the massive window to give you far more than you bargained for with the natural sunlight despite the depressing clouds, “and we do not smoke indoors.”

“I’m not smoking it!”

“Attitude,” you want to sigh but you’re sure that runs in the same category as what she’d just warned you about in your tone, so you bite your tongue and just wait to hear what she wants. 

“I’ve been told you’ve missed a lot of your classes.” 

“By who?” 

“We had dinner with the Lee’s. Juyeon expressed his concern over you. Why you ever broke up with that handsome young man is beyond me, Y/N,” yeah, it was beyond you too, at this point. Clearly you were the fucking idiot, as everyone so rightfully had begun to assume. Juyeon was the perfect man, one most girls would probably dream of and you had him. You had him, and you wasted the opportunity to be happy with him. 

And what for? 

“I know, mother.”

“You should come with this time. Maybe you can both make up before we go on that lovely vacation together.”

“What…?”

She stands by the edge of your bed with condescending eyes that look down on you and make you feel small, which was ironic because your mother was about a head shorter than you and incredibly petite, but her personality was so in your face, her stare so cold that it made you feel like nothing. She made you feel insignificant and she did so perfectly. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve already forgotten? You’ve always been forgetful,” you cast your eyes down to your lap, listening to her berate you and having no real way of defending yourself without it earning you a slap or worse. 

“I’m sorry. Just have a lot on my mind.”

“Go on a walk. You could go to the docks on one of the boats. I don’t care. But stop missing classes because I will not have a failure of a child when she gets everything handed to her,” it stings. It really stings to be insulted so genuinely. Your grades were by no means terrible and your mother rarely cared before about any of your stupid behaviour, but you supposed as soon as your mask slipped and you fell towards lower status, she could sense it like a blood hound and she was intent on destroying you to a point in which you’d need to remodel yourself to be perfect again. 

You were grateful for her, because she knew how to shape you into someone you wanted to be. 

“And invite Juyeon if you’re taking the boat out!”

She leaves without another glance your way and you feel like nothing, but you also call Juyeon, so you suppose her harsh words and loveless demeanour worked. They worked at beating you down and you listened to her, but you couldn’t say you weren’t at least a little relieved when Juyeon didn’t pick up at first.

“What?”

Damn it. 

“You called me first.”

“And now you’re calling me back,” it felt like a game. It was constant at this point and it never felt healthy and yet you knew no better. You weren’t dumb but Juyeon had an incredible way of making you appear to be the greatest idiot. 

“My mother wants us to take the boat out,” you wait for a response, not hearing one first until there’s shuffling on the other line. 

“Just us?”

“Well, she likes you,” you add, which you knew would work well for his bruised ego. Juyeon loved being told he was liked and you knew how to feed into it well. You’d spent years learning the intricacies that made up Lee Juyeon, and you doubted that would ever fully go away. You weren’t sure if you wanted it to go at all. 

“Have you told her why I haven’t been around?”

“You could always tell her yourself. She hates me enough, you can’t make it worse,” you hear him on the other end and you hope he feels bad for you. You want him to, even if it’s just for a little moment. 

“That’s just not as fun,” he breaks your illusioned disbelief that he could be sympathetic towards you and you wish yet again for your remaining feelings to go away. 

Instead, you decide to be stupid and slip up. 

“I really loved you.”

The silence is so painfully long you could honestly throw yourself out the two story window of the view your mother had just revealed to you moments before. 

“You don’t love me anymore?”

The way you fell into his traps was so effortless. Juyeon wasn’t having to really try and yet you fell right into his hand every time without fail. You were so drawn to him and you couldn't tell for what reason. Because in truth you didn’t really see yourself as wanting a relationship with him, he was an asshole and yet you ran in circles because you somehow still liked him despite it all. 

“Juyeon…”

“Do you love me?”

He asks it again and the question is a demand for you to answer and yet it doesn’t come naturally to you the way you want it to. It feels false, maybe because you know you’re walking yourself into a trap. Yet the trap being laid out for you to see doesn’t hinder you any less from falling into it because of the reward you see in the midst of it. 

“I love you.”

“Then why don’t we celebrate?”

A yacht party was not at all what you had in mind when celebrating your pathetic attempt at clearing your image by being back on Juyeon’s side. But Juyeon had insisted and your mother had somehow overheard at some point and was practically beaming just at the prospect of Juyeon being back on one of your family boats. Her timing was masterful and you hated everything about it. 

You also hated the looks you were getting, judgement, whilst Juyeon was on the opposite end of the yacht gleaming and taking in every ounce of sympathy like it fed him. He’d so graciously forgiven you, told everyone that it was an honest mistake and that he understood you both were over, and now everyone stood at his feet as if ready to do any and all of his bidding.

It was insufferable.

“I think he likes attention more than you,” Chanhee mumbles, standing next to you now with a champagne flute between his delicate fingers and you turn to him with a frown on your face. 

“I think it’s pathetic.”

“I’d agree,” your best friend leans back a little, staring into the dark water as night time beams above you in the shape of a crescent moon, “but you go for it every time.”

“I’m not here for a lecture,” you have a sip of your drink, grimacing at the strength of it. You’d been a little too generous on the rum, even for your standards, but you need the alcohol if you’re going to get through this night out on open water. 

“Have you seen the new kids?”

Chanhee nudges you towards another direction, one that has two younger men downing a glass of something each, and being urged on to do so by Younghoon and Hyunjae. Juyeon was now talking to a girl you didn’t care to know the name of, but he occasionally glanced over too. 

“Freshmen?” 

“Mhmm, one of them is kinda cute, no?”

You give your best friend an odd look before glancing back over. They both look young, not older than twenty, playful and energetic and so full of life that you wonder when that’ll go away. You wonder when both of them will realise the world is dark and being so carefree was simply being naive. 

“Which one?”

Chanhee gestures to the one on the left, with dark hair and full lips that you’re sure has made girls jealous in the past, and if not jealous, at least more than willing to kiss him. He seemed to know it too, because something about him felt cocky and maybe even arrogant, despite his sweet playful smile and loud laugh that you could hear from this far away. 

The other, a striking blonde colour of hair that he’d definitely bleached with a sharp pointed nose that seemed surgical, making you wonder if he’d invested in a nose job as soon as he’d turned eighteen. It wouldn’t surprise you if he had, for if it was real it was almost absurdly perfect. 

“Juyeon invited them?” Chanhee shrugs, though given that neither you nor your best friend seemed to have any clue on who they were and had no influence on them showing up, you were almost certain it was Juyeon. It was near confirmed when your recent lover approached the blonde and wrapped an arm over his shoulder, ruffling through his hair playfully though you could see the roughness in his grip. 

It’d surely be blamed on boys being boys.

“I’m gonna grab another drink,” you say, and you can see Juyeon’s eyes meet yours as you do. He detaches from the blonde and approaches you, and god do you wish it wasn’t noticeable to everyone that he was doing so. 

“Little princess,” he leans against the railing, watching as you pour yourself more rum but in truth you are ready to down the whole bottle when he talks to you, “why’re you frowning?”

“Did you invite freshmen?”

“Who? Oh- you mean Sunwoo and Eric? I did, yeah. They’re cute, right?” 

There had to be a motive. You didn’t trust Juyeon to have pure intentions and simply so graciously bring a pair of freshmen onto a party such as this. There was no way in hell Juyeon would introduce someone into his social circle without gaining something out of it. Especially someone younger than him. 

“What’re you doing with them?”

“I’m thinking a sex party?” you laugh because it’s absurd, but Juyeon laughs too because he’s managed to humour you and it’s nice. It’s nice to laugh with someone you consider close, someone that is similar to you and that understands the importance of status and appearance. 

“Now what is it actually?”

Juyeon looks over, seeing his friends and the two in question playing around with a lighter and the not lit outdoor fireplace. At least not lit yet, given that they were clearly trying. Hyunjae was sat on the circular couch, Younghoon lying next to him, Sunwoo standing and berating Eric who was hunched over trying to light the coal, “he needs ignition.”

“I’ll go grab it for him.”

Juyeon leaves you standing there with a bad feeling. Drunk people around a fire, intoxicated people in general around live flames was a recipe for disaster. Yet you weren’t stopping it. Maybe because you knew it wouldn’t be you to fall into it. 

Chanhee had joined them, sat next to Hyunjae with his legs curled under his thighs as he held a new glass in hand, looking so delicate and regal he felt most like royalty out of all of you. He was so beautiful, it made you jealous again. It was worse, too, to know that he had naturally just formed to be this way, whilst your parents had discretely paid for your nose to be fixed, your breasts to be augmented and to have some leftover fat dissolved to appear even smaller. 

Not that you’d outright admitted it to anyone, though you were sure those who’d known you long enough, knew that a part of you simply wasn’t real anymore, because reality wasn’t pretty and you wanted to be.

Juyeon joined them a few seconds after with lighter fluid, thankfully not being too generous with how much he coated the charcoal in. At least he seemed sober, more than anyone else that was sat there, and you watched Eric attempting to light the flames again, this time successful in sparking a fire that jumped high enough to nearly hit his face, making him jump back in surprise and panic at the thought of getting burned. 

Unbelievable. 

You walked over to them and sat down at the very edge, Eric turning his attention to you with a bright smile that surprised even you. He seemed energetic and sweet, but why he was so open to you simply coming over was a strange feeling. Juyeon noticed it too, and before you realised, he’d moved to sit between you both.

“Are you jealous?” Juyeon looks at you with a forced smile, shaking his head before having more of his drink and turning his attention to you. 

“I have no reason to be,” he answers, and you suppose he’s right though just the same you wish for him to be, “I’m not the jealous type.”

It felt like a lie. Juyeon’s characteristics that made up who he was were all fairly negative and jealousy was one of them. But then he’d have ways in which he showed kindness with gentle touches and you fell into it because those touches were warm and those words were sweet. 

“Not like me, right?” 

You attempt a joke you both know to be true. You could easily get jealous, because the prospect of having romantic competition made you feel worthless, like you weren’t good enough, and so anger came naturally whenever your worth was threatened. 

“Not like you,” he has more of his drink and you drown out the conversation, watching the way your best friend cuts up two lines of cocaine with Sunwoo now, as if he’d made a quick natural friend and you’re just at the very edge being forgotten. It’s the feeling of unimportance and being replaced that bothers you, and instead you focus on the fire right in front of you. It’s enchanting and beautiful, tempting enough to fall into because it’s warm and inviting. 

It’s dangerous too and that isn’t lost on you, but you still lean a little closer, being careful to push your hair back whilst you watch the flames. You’re in a little world, one none of them are in and you honestly don’t think they ever really noticed how close you’d gotten to the fire, which ends up being the big mistake. 

You’re not sure what happens, but the flames make a crackling sound and the fire rises so incredibly close to your face, you feel the heat sting at your skin. It sends you into high alert and panic, causing you to scream and turn around just quick enough to avoid it burning your face. Unfortunately, the wind and your hair among the flames causes the strands to start burning.

“What the fuck, Eric!”

“We need to put it out!” Chanhee. That’s his voice and the only one you can make out. The others barely seem to move and you’re not sure if it’s shock or because they don’t care, but Chanhee is genuinely the only one moving at first.

You can feel the way it hurts your skin, but it all happens so fast that the pain barely registers with the way the back fabric of your dress singes. 

“Are you fucking stupid?” Chanhee, again, but then you feel another force that sends you falling forward and the sound of a fire extinguisher. 

“YOU’RE NOT MEANT TO USE THAT ON A PERSON!”

So many voices, complete panic and you barely register any of it. You feel dazed, nearly unresponsive and it’s likely the shock settling in that just leaves you numb to it. At least the fire seems to be out, given the darkness that had cast over all of you. Your skin feels cold at first, until you feel a heavy blanket over your shoulder and Juyeon crouches in front of you. 

He’s speaking to you, but you really have no idea what he’s saying. Even when he cups your cheeks, it’s completely lost on you. Nothing he says is audible and for just a brief second you wonder if maybe you’d entirely lost your hearing, though you don’t see why you would and you’d heard voices just seconds before. 

You feel him touch your hair and you’re relieved more than anything to know it’s still there at first. The very relief of knowing that makes you want to cry, but you refuse to show any of them that you were scared. 

“She needs a hospital. Turn the boat around,” you hate attention like this. When you’re vulnerable, it’s not what you want. 

“How bad is it…?” 

You sound hoarse, but Juyeon doesn’t get time to answer because Eric intervenes with panicked eyes. He looks so genuinely guilty, like a kicked puppy and you know almost immediately that deep down it was likely a genuine mistake. Though it didn’t really matter as the damage was done either way, “I’m so, so sorry. I’m really sorry.”

You don’t think you forgive him. Even if he looks sorry, you’re more than a little upset, rightfully so, “I can’t believe you’re so fucking stupid. Who’re you trying to impress, anyway?”

It cuts him, you can tell. That childlike energy that had been there before dies the second you speak to him like he means nothing. Eric looks like he could cry and you’re certain you don’t really care but something about his eyes make you feel guilty. And you don’t do well with guilt. 

You force yourself up and away from everyone, pushing past Younghoon harshly because you can see him trying to bite down laughter. You’re near close to slapping him, but you don’t want even more unwanted attention. 

You hide away in the bathroom and no one seems to follow you first, locking the door after yourself  before stripping down to your underwear, discarding your heels and letting your feet rest bare against the tiled interior. Every bit of sound is slowly coming back, and you seem to be returning to your senses as you cast your eyes outside through the small circular window, seeing the distant city and the water break into aggressive ripples of small waves. 

You run your hands through your hair, trying to adjust the mess that it probably was before you realise that certain strands come to an abrupt harsh stop. It feels uneven, shortened and burned and that’s when you first notice the smell that becomes so sharp so suddenly that it overwhelms you. 

You open your palm up to be met with charcoals of black burnt hair that you’d broken trying to brush through it with your fingers and now you’re completely certain that you fucking hate Eric. He’d ruined your appearance, and it’s only confirmed when you look in the mirror and are met with something so ugly, you could break the glass in front of you. 

So you do. You break down and shatter the mirror because what you see disgusts you. A part of what had made you so feminine and pretty was scorched unevenly, in parts up to your shoulder, and it was so ugly and heart wrenching you could’ve thrown up just remembering what it looked like. 

It was so ugly and unattractive and the worst was knowing that everyone else had seen it before you. They had seen it, and said nothing. Juyeon had touched your strands of hair near the root and yet said nothing to indicate that a part of it was missing by the ends of where your hair usually fell.

You can’t take seeing it, and in your slightly intoxicated mind it makes you sink enough that you throw up into the toilet, hating yourself more than you ever had. It would take years to grow back the hair you’d lost, and worst was that you’d have to let go of the length that some strands still held. The ones that went unscathed and were still perfect would be lost just the same. 

It was so embarrassing. 

Your hand was bleeding, shards of broken glass between the knuckles but you made no attempt to get rid of them. You could’ve been dying and it would’ve meant nothing to you. 

A knock on the door snaps you out of your dazed mind but you don’t respond. You hope maybe they’ll go away, but then there’s another knock followed by a third in quick succession, “want a line?”

Chanhee. You laugh at the way he speaks and then you soften because he’s there, standing on the other side and looking for you. So with the little strength you can bother to conjure up, you unlock the door for him. 

“Holy shit,” it’s not you being naked that really surprises him, but rather the utter damaged state this room was in, “your parents are gonna kill you.”

“Fuck, I didn’t even think about that,” you groan, watching your best friend lock the door once more before grabbing a towel and turning on the faucet, the water presumably cold. 

“I hear Juyeon’s pissed,” Chanhee starts, and it manages a smile out of you just briefly as he comes over, “Eric feels horrible, though.”

“He should,” you snarl, watching the way Chanhee grabs a pair of tweezers from his purse, disinfecting it with a wipe before grabbing your hand. 

“Should I book you a hairdresser?”

You know he’s trying to lighten the mood, but you don’t find it funny. You don’t say anything as he starts to remove some of the glass from your skin, carefully and precise as to not cause you more injury. He seems to get the hint, that you’re not in the mood for anything lighthearted, so he stops and falls silent that only you break after a few minutes. 

“I’m ugly, Chanhee.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You’ll get a cute haircut and you’ll be perfect again.”

Even if that were to be true, you’d never be Chanhee. You felt so jealous, the more you thought of it. So much so, that you wanted to hate him. You wanted to tell him how unfair it was, that he didn’t deserve it when you did, but you would never dare to break what made you two so close. You loved him.

“I don’t want a haircut. I want my hair.”

“I know,” but he says it like you should know that it’s not an option. You do know, and it makes you want to die inside. 

Another knock and a voice you make out to be Juyeon’s, so you let Chanhee reach over and unlock the door as a familiar figure leans in with a smirk on his face. Maybe it’s seeing you sat here naked, but you turn your head away to avoid looking at him, “ambulance is here. We’ve docked.”

Chanhee finishes getting one more piece of glass out and helps you up, Juyeon handing you your dress and helping you with your shoes, touching your bare legs so carefully that it makes you feel a little shaky. He smiles, looking up at you with sweet gentle eyes that are so unlike him and once again bring in the idea of a motive to your mind, “your mothers gonna kill you for that glass, by the way.”

Everything else after the boat docked had become a blur. You had some mild burns but your now ruined dress had protected most of the flames before they were put out, so most of the marks were faint angry red shades on your back that would likely fade over time if you kept it well treated and applied an ointment to avoid scarring. You’d been grateful that it hadn’t been worse but the state you were in didn’t quite feel better.

Your hand wasn’t broken, but one of the gashes had been pretty bad unbeknownst to you and it had needed five stitches, everything being wrapped up in a bandage as you were told to rest a couple of days. 

You’d wanted to rest, but the following morning, your mother had other ideas.

“Juyeon tells me you had an accide- my god, what happened to your hair?”

“I burned it off,” came your response, feeling your blanket being ripped away from you, your bare legs being met with the cold air as you tried to adjust your shirt. 

“Why in heaven's name would you ever do that?” God, you could laugh. She clearly didn’t know you, if she ever thought you’d do such a stupid thing intentionally. 

“I’ll get it sorted,” though you’d made no attempt at making an appointment. As long as the outside world didn’t see you, you could be as ugly as you wanted. 

“You, young lady, are headed to class,” she slaps the bottom of your leg before running over to your beloved curtains, tearing them open and letting the offensive light blind you, “you’ve missed far too much already.”

“I’d rather die than go looking like this,” you mutter, earning you another slap to your skin that makes you sit up sharply and glare at her with such discontent, she must know that you hate her. 

“Should’ve made an appointment in the morning then. You can fix it later, but you’re going, now.”

There was no point in arguing. Even with a valid doctor's note, it was pointless. She’d make you go to uni and whatever you said would be entirely without point because it wasn’t valid. It didn’t matter. The best you could do was attempt to look presentable despite your singed hair and then run to your family's go to salon for help right after.

You made sure to wear something revealing. Something hopefully distracting enough so that the hair you’d tied up in a bun, wouldn’t be very noticeable. You actually thought you managed to hide it with fair success, but you had to pull out nearly every trick you knew about a tight ballerina bun to hide most of the damage. The biggest issue was the damaged strands being so short in length sometimes, that they kept falling back out and refusing to lay the way you wanted them to. 

Your mother had already left the house by the time you were ready, in a tight mini skirt and a shirt kept together by string in the middle, showing plenty of skin all the way down to your pierced navel. It was just enough to grab attention away from everything else that needed fixing. 

Getting to class made you realise just how much people talk. As if the vitriol from Juyeon humiliating you with Changmin’s name hadn’t been bad enough, now everyone seemed to know about your burns and the bandage on your hand didn’t help either. You’d overheard someone say that they thought you’d gone off the rails, making you shove your shoulder against theirs so that they fell off balance. 

But that girl hadn’t been the only one to say it. It felt like everyone was looking at you again, like this was high school and your dirty little secrets were all exposed to be mocked and tormented until you well and truly became the off the rails mess that they already claimed for you to be. The looks were horrific, but the fake sympathy in trying to speak to you was worse. 

Though you’d truly wanted to lose it when you overheard the sympathy Eric was getting. How sorry he’d been and how it had been such a horrible accident. How bad he felt, that you’d rejected his apology and been so cruel to him. That you were truly a horrible person. Even if it might’ve been true that Eric felt bad, he had hurt you, and yet no one spared any real empathy for you. No one cared. 

You had one more class for the day but a long gap in between where you’d need to find something to do, and so you settled on the park nearby with a small lunch and a coffee, having a sip before you reached for the tobacco in your bag. 

You still wouldn’t call yourself a smoker, but you could use one now and it was still practice and improvement from the absolute travesty you had rolled before. Besides, you found it peaceful, to sit there and roll a cigarette to then smoke or save for later. 

“It’s getting better,” you look up and see Changmin already with a cigarette between his lips, placing it between his fingers to move it down and away from his mouth as he exhales. He’s dressed warm, in a dark sweater and jeans with a coat over both, his eyes staring at your own as he takes you in, “you want help?”

“I don’t need your help.”

“I didn’t ask if you needed it. I asked if you wanted it,” you were struggling and he could tell. Your hand still hurt from injuring it and it made rolling even more awkward, so eventually you relented and just shoved the bag of tobacco out for him to take. He sighs and sits next to you, turning his body a bit towards you as he discards his own cigarette entirely in favour of starting over. 

“Why’d you waste it?”

“Well, I figured if I offered it to you, you’d refuse it,” he was right, “I’ll roll two.”

Normally you’d be tempted to argue and fight with him using your stuff, but you have no energy and he was kind enough to share with you last time. You watch him, the way his fingers work together to roll the first cigarette, and you can’t say you’re not entranced because you are. The way he does it makes it all seem so easy. 

He seals the first cigarette with his tongue before placing it behind his ear, and you swear for the first time you saw a hint of jewellery, “do you have a piercing?”

“I have more than one,” he gets to work on the next one, looking over at you briefly as you try not to stare too obviously. You’d seen the ones on his ear but the one on his tongue had been new to you. 

“I never noticed.”

“We don’t really talk,” he hands you your cigarette and you nod in thanks, twisting it between your fingers once to inspect it before placing it between your lips. You end up fiddling with your lighter, huffing in frustration each time it refuses to light. The wind worked against you and it seemed low on lighter fluid already, but still you persisted. 

“Here,” his cigarette is lit, and he places the burning side against yours, “just inhale.”

You listen to him and the flames transfer to your cigarette when you do, thanking him again, though you’re not sure why he didn’t just offer you his lighter instead, “I had it.”

“Sure,” you both fall silent again and you must admit it’s getting a little bit annoying to have nothing to really talk about. It seems so pointless, like it holds no real purpose and yet there’s a comfort in just being sat here and clearing your head. 

“What did you do with your hand?”

“You’re telling me you haven’t heard?” you don’t believe it. Changmin might not socialise but he does hear about things. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t have been so wrapped up in the last one. Or maybe that one only reached him because it directly involved him. 

“Isn’t it better to hear the truth from you?” he surprises you again. You hadn’t really thought of it that way. In your eyes, people were always quick to believe what they were told from others whether or not it was the truth. Especially from those whose words held more weight simply because of who they were. And if someone like Younghoon, who you suspected, was running around telling people you were insane, they were bound to believe it without fact checking his claims at all.

“I broke a mirror,” he laughs, as if it’s amusing to hear about your screw up and you wonder if it would be worth hitting him again. 

“You really are something else, even for a rich person,” you want to know if that surprises him. If he’s as confused by you as you are by him and his strange behaviour. He seems to bite back less in sarcasm today, but he still speaks like he’s unimpressed, unphased by your violent outburst and rather finding it amusing. 

You stare at him for a long time, taking in his side profile up close. The way his glasses frame his face, how his dimples aren’t as deep but still there because he’s trying to bite back his amusement in a smile that you find pretty, even if you won’t say it. He takes another drag of his cigarette, then turns his attention back to you, though it quickly falls from your face to your hair as he gestures to it, “and this? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you with your hair up.”

“You pay attention to things like that?”

 “Unintentionally, yes.”

“But you don’t notice it’s burnt?”

“Oh, no, I noticed it,” of course he did. He was probably waiting for the opportunity to tug your hairpins out so he could see the disaster that is your hair. It probably didn’t matter, really, if he saw it, but you liked the belief that you could remain beautiful, at least in someone's eyes, regardless of who they were. 

Then again, Changmin might not find you pretty at all. 

“I wasn’t meant to come today but my mother told me to. I haven’t been able to fix it,” you’re not sure why you’re honest, especially to him, but he doesn’t really say anything at first while he continues smoking, “I don’t know why I’m even telling you this.”

“Neither do I,” god, what an asshole. He simply couldn’t keep his mouth shut and accept it, “is it true a freshmen burned it off?”

“So you did hear about it?”

“I saw him getting coddled in the hallway. I think a girl brought him flowers,” of course she did. He gets flowers and you get to drop a couple of hundred at the hairdresser to salvage what’s left. You’re not even sure you want to go at all and be faced with the vitriol. 

“I really don’t need our family hairdresser to tell the whole community about my hair being charcoal black because of a drunk night out.” 

“You have a family hairdresser?” it’s like it’s the most absurd thing you’ve said, stranger than your hair being burnt by an open flame, or the fact that you smashed a mirror and your mother dragged you out anyway, or the countless other things, actually, that you’d said and he hadn’t really cared to comment on. 

“You focus on the wrong things.”

“And all you focus on is superficial at best,” you wonder what he considers the worst, “so you’re not going to get it fixed?”

No, you are going to get it fixed. That’s what you want to tell him, that of course you’re going to drag your ass there right after your final lesson is over. That it’ll be perfect again tomorrow and you will be perfect and you can forget all about it. Maybe you can even forgive Eric if you’re feeling extra generous, although you don’t think you will be. 

“I will. I just… have to find another hairdresser. I don’t really know how to do that.”

“Google it?” you grimace, eyeing him strangely yet he looks at you like you have three heads. Like something is seriously wrong with you and you wonder if he’s right or if he just has no concept of the real world.

“I don’t want them to say something.”

“I doubt they care,” Changmin offends you, but he says it nonchalantly and casually as he puts out his cigarette and discards the filtered end, “let me do it.”

“I’d rather die than let you touch me,” it’s a quick answer, snapping back at him with determination because you really would rather sign an early death than let him any closer than he already is just sitting here next to you. 

“But I don’t care about how ridiculous you might look,” so he admits you probably look insane. You know better than to believe that he wouldn’t laugh at you, yet you also wonder if maybe that was better than it being spoken around your closed community and bringing embarrassment to your parents for your drunk failings. They didn’t care what you did if it didn’t affect them, yet this might and therefore it became a bigger problem. 

“Do you even know how to cut hair?”

“How hard can it be?”

“Absolutely not,” you think that’s the end of it, but you hadn’t known Changmin to be so determined with something such as this, for he seems persistent in making a case for himself as he turns to you fully. 

“I think you should think about it.”

“You could make it worse. You have no idea what you’re doing and you hate me too,” he doesn’t disagree with it, though he does seem to think. Perhaps another way of making his case though you really don’t know what could convince you when you had money at your fingertips to even fly halfway across the globe for someone to fix it for you. 

Which, actually, might’ve not been a bad idea. No one would know you abroad.

“I wouldn’t cut it any more than where the strands are burnt.”

“No.”

“Fine, at least let me see it.”

“Absolutely not,” he huffs like a child, watching the clouds pass while the sky dims to a depressing grey, indicating rainfall. You don’t need to be laughed at, especially by someone lesser than you.

“I have to go,” you want to ask him how his date went. You remember it now that he goes to leave. Yet you also know not to ask him. The last thing you wanted was his assumption that you might be interested in him, “you can think about it.”

“I don’t think I will.”

“Suit yourself, little doll,” he leaves you alone and you simply stay sat with a frown on your face until the raindrops start falling and you’re forced to go inside. 

They had all been right. You’d lost your mind, completely, because the hairdresser you had found completely destroyed your ends even more and you refused to let yourself be seen by anyone until it was fixed. Like a dog with his tail between his legs, you drove to university without the intent of actually going to class, but rather waited like a stalker for Changmin to appear at some point, because he had to, right?

It took far longer than you’d hoped, because the first time he had appeared, there were far too many people around for you to give in to his suggestion of doing it himself, but turns out paying for it to have it done professionally hadn’t done much of a difference and had been far from worth it. 

The second time he came out, he had his nose in a book and was barely watching where he was going, and you figured it would be the perfect time to step out and talk to him. You’d still dressed up, albeit not as much as you usually might to avoid detection, when you approach him and stand right before him. 

“Sorry,” he mumbles, his head not moving up to look at you as he keeps walking. You felt ridiculous chasing him, but you grabbed his shoulder and stopped him in his steps, finally looking up to face you, “oh, it’s you.”

“What do you mean, oh?” 

“Exactly what it sounds like. What the fuck happened to your hair?” Changmin asks, seeing that you kept it out but hidden under the hood of your jacket, and he could still see the damaged parts as you’d eventually gotten up mid hair appointment to leave before she could finish and do any worse.

“Someone fucked it up, obviously. Are you stupid?”

“No, but your insults when you want something from me are a poor choice,” you cross your arms, standing straighter to look down on him, heels just tall enough to do so while he adjusts and closes his book, “so, what is it?”

“I… need your help,” fuck, that pains you. It really kicks your ego and confidence to have to ask something of him. Well, not that you had to, but you were refusing the family hairdresser even more now and if Changmin fucked up too, at least his services were free. 

“You want my help?”

“You offered it,” you bite back, but he doesn’t seem pleased. If he was taking his offer back, you felt like he should just say so, but instead he was smiling as he lit a cigarette. 

“That I did,” he was so cocky, it reminded you of Juyeon, “I guess I could give it a try.”

“You said you would.”

“I said I can do it if you’d like me to try.”

“And I’m telling you to.”

“But you should be asking me.”

“Changmin, you think I haven’t been through enough embarrassing shit because of you? You owe me this fucking favour before I break your neck with my heel.”

He stops entirely, eyeing you up and down briefly before he finally settles on your eyes again. It’s a little intimidating to have him stare at you so intently, but you refuse to show discomfort and stand your ground. He fucking owed you this and you knew that he did. He did owe it to you, at the very least for the rumour involving you and Juyeon.

“Okay, sure. But I’m driving.”

He discards his cigarette and holds out his hand for the key, and you really think he’s joking before he gives you another look telling you to hurry up. 

“Are you serious?”

“Think of it as payment,” it’s crazy to you but you ultimately agree. Curse you for not using your driver for one day, but why should you when you weren’t even planning to attend classes. It just left another witness to tell your parents that you had been faltering in the one thing they expected you to do well on. 

“I hate you,” his hands hold the key to your Mercedes and he seems content, and you watch as he steps up inside your car so carelessly that it makes you nearly cry out to tell him off.

When you get in, he leans over and places his bag down by your feet and you note that same cologne that had sat on his hoodie that you took so long ago. A creature of habit, whereas you went through various perfumes depending on the type of outfit you were wearing. 

“Can you be more careful? The interior is custom.”

“Of course it is,” he adjusts the seat and you realise what a bad idea this really was because everything he changes now, you’ll have to change back, but it was too late. He settled and reversed the car far faster than you would’ve liked, barely looking in his rearview mirror to see if he’d hit someone. 

“Do you even know how to drive?”

“It’s an automatic. Even an idiot can drive one. Exhibit A,” he looks at you and you ignore it by looking ahead before he abruptly hits the breaks because someone crosses the parking lot completely unexpectedly, “god, some people just want to die.”

“Do you even have a licence?”

The silence confirms your expected fear and you cannot believe you just put your life in his hands. You wish you could hit the brakes, but he’s turned into the main road and now you’re wondering if you’ve well and truly lost your mind. You can practically hear Chanhee’s voice berating you for the insanity that you’re currently in. 

“Where am I going, by the way?”

“I guess my house,” he sighs, and your hand instinctively falls to the wheel to pull him more to the right to avoid the left lane.

“Yeah, and where is that?”

“Oh, right. I’ll write it in the nav,” he scoffs like it’s absurd, but you’re not really in the mood to give instructions and honestly you didn’t think you’d be very good at it. You knew the way well and your mind would naturally think where to turn without saying it outloud. 

“You’re driving too fast,” at this point you’d fully accepted your potential demise, because making him pull over seemed like an almost worse idea at this point. 

“I thought it was sixty.”

“It’s fifty,” you answer him, and at least he listens and slows down, maybe because being caught meant you’d both be in horrific trouble. 

There’s no music and the silence in such close proximity isn’t exactly your idea of fun, but it’s becoming a little more familiar than you’d like to be like this with Changmin. It wasn’t that you liked him or enjoyed his company, but the way you both sat together without speaking had become a little common, at least enough that you found it to be okay. 

“This cannot be real,” he mumbles, the gates to your community closed before you hand him the keycard. He looks at it like it’s alien, but he opens the window and reaches for the keypad to open the gate, “I actually hate rich people.”

He doesn’t sound genuine, more baffled if anything as he drives in and over to your house. His eyes just widen more as he parks outside the front steps leading to the massive entrance door, but you’re more relieved that you survived driving as a passenger with someone that had no right to even take you anywhere with a car, “I was gonna say park in the garage but I suppose you can leave it.”

“I think I’m good, yeah.” 

You step out with him, taking the key back as soon as he lets it dangle between his fingers for you to take, and you walk in with him and greet one of your cleaners that seems more than a little surprised to see you with someone. Normally you might make an attempt to hide who you were with, but she was nice and didn’t speak often, especially to your parents unless it was work related, so you knew her to not be the type to say something. 

You really hoped, anyway, or you were definitely fucked. 

“Do you have scissors for cutting hair?”

“I think we do somewhere. I’ll ask someone,” though Changmin doesn’t seem to be listening, because his eyes are cast elsewhere and you notice your little ragdoll perched on the railing and looking at him with curious eyes. 

“Oh, look at this little cutie,” he approaches her carefully, holding his hand out gently but she seems more than a little excited, which you find unusual, though maybe she sensed his compliment to stroke her little ego. 

“Thought you didn’t like cats?”

“How can I not when I see this little dear, hmm?” 

She purrs in response, pushing her head up into his palm as he scratches her ear, and you nearly roll your eyes at seeing her unusual affection. She liked Chanhee, sure, but even that had taken some time, but with Changmin she’s practically on his lap within the first minute. 

“Do you have any treats for her?”

“Sure, they’re in my room. Or the kitchen.”

He follows after you, the little lady prancing after him like she’s straight out of the aristocats, elegant in how she moves and so confident in her step. Lady really is a diva.

“They’re on the desk,” you gesture over to the corner and Changmin moves over to find them, but he’s slow and looking around like he���s taking it all in. It leaves you a little vulnerable, only because the way you’ve decorated is a look inside who you are, feminine and expensive, with simple colours and beautiful plants and endless books that are overflowing on your shelf. 

“I didn’t know you read.”

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“I know you’re a pain in my ass. Here you go, darling,” he crouches down, holding out a treat for your cat while you open a window. She seems pleased, tapping his hand for more with her little paw and even you admit it’s a cute display of affection from her. 

“I’ll look for the scissors.”

Changmin doesn’t answer, busy being loved by a cat and so you leave them both while on the hunt for some scissors. In the end, you ask one of the cleaners if he’d seen any around while finishing up your parents’ bathroom and to your surprise the search is successful when you go through one of the drawers. 

You pass the kitchen and grab a bottle of water from the fridge, one for Changmin too because you hadn’t asked and you were not prepared to walk back downstairs again in case he wanted some. That, and you brought a packet of gummy bears, not for you but him, and then came back upstairs to see Changmin still on the floor waving a string with a little tiger on the end that Lady was chasing relentlessly. 

“I found them,” he looks up at you and she takes the opportunity to pounce on the toy, dragging it between her claws as he tries to push against her, “I also have water.”

“Voss?”

“Yeah?”

“Isn’t that overpriced tap water?”

“Tap water tastes like blood. This is citrusy,” you hold it out to him, and he takes it despite his apprehension.

“Put a lemon in it,” he says, before adding, “and why do you know what blood tastes like?”

“Why do you not?”

He gets up while you rummage around your room, moving your chair right in front of your mirror to give you a view of what he’s doing, “I might need wine, on second thought.”

“I’m not going to ruin your hair any more than it already is,” at least he acknowledges the horrific state it was in, but you knew that, “did the hairdresser cut it that weirdly?” 

“I didn’t let her finish. Look at this,” you show him one of the butchered strands and even Changmin looks more than a little shocked that a professional had done such a horrific job.

“I’ll have to cut quite a lot. You realise that, right?”

You did. Of course you knew your once beautiful long hair would be no longer than right by your shoulder and that fucking shattered your heart and confidence, but you could not keep it like this either and magically having longer hair again wasn’t happening without a wig or extensions. 

“I won’t cut before you tell me it’s fine but a lot of it is still burnt up to about… here,” he gestures to your collarbone, though he’s careful not to touch you. Maybe he knows you won’t like it and he’s right, you wouldn’t like it, but you were surprised by his way of keeping boundaries. 

“If you manage to do this well I’ll buy your groceries for a week,” Changmin perks up, like he hadn’t expected it but they were words he was happy to hear. Almost like he needed it. 

“I wouldn’t mind that,” and now your mind wandered again, because he’d insisted he had at least some money and yet he made it sound like he was struggling just to buy some food. Though you try not to dwell on it as you grab your hairbrush to gently get the knots out of your hair.

“I really don’t want you to cut more than you need to.”

“I already told you I won't,” he’s getting frustrated, you can tell, but you want to make sure he gets it. If he didn’t listen to you, it would be so much worse and you’d be absolutely destroyed, and Changmin likely wouldn’t care because it didn’t affect him. 

“Okay, so I have a plan,” he says, and even those words cause you worry but you’re willing to hear him out before you both commit, “I’ll just cut all the long hair that’s left up until slightly above your chest and then I’ll actually be neater and more precise with what’s left to work with that’ll get rid of all the burnt hair.”

Not a terrible plan, actually. It’s not like he’d have to be neat cutting up to a certain point if it wasn’t going to stay. It would be a waste of both your time if he did it that way, “okay, we’ll try that.”

“Do you want any music?” Changmin asks you, your cat jumping up onto the bed to perch herself on the edge and watch the way you both move and speak. You wonder if she can tell you both dislike each other, or if she thinks maybe that’s a friend. It makes you curious to know how cats think, but that was a whole other thought process that you were honestly too sober to consider really having. 

“I can turn some on,” you connect your phone to your speakers, pressing the shuffle button and leaving it on one of the coffee tables you had next to the mirror full of perfumes and some accessories. 

You take a seat and place a towel that you’d gotten around your back and a little towards the front of your body, adjusting your back so it’s straight as Changmin stands behind you. You watch him in the mirror, the way he studies your hair and seems to be contemplating on how to best approach it. It makes you nervous, and once again you’re wondering when you became this insane. 

“Okay, I’ll just start cutting.”

“Okay.”

You both fall silent, though you’re left still staring at him in the way you both reflect before you amongst a few polaroids stuck on your mirror. Your heart picks up when you feel his fingers brush the back of your neck as he takes some of your hair between his fingers, but you push it away and try to focus on something else. Anything else. 

The first strands of hair fall and you feel like crying. You see the way they end up on the floor, how they lay there and you feel terrible. It feels like you’re ripping away a big piece of yourself and you didn’t wish for it to ever happen. 

“I can’t believe Eric did this to me.”

“Wasn’t it an accident?”

“I don’t care,” you snarl, crossing your arms and watching him cut away more and more pieces. For a second you wonder if he’s cut too much but he seems to know how to read your mind because he brings what’s left of it to the front of your body so that you can see its length, most of it the promised length he’d agreed on with you aside from the bit of hair that was already ruined or made shorter before he ever got to it. 

“If it helps, I think short hair might suit you,” might. Not that it would, that it might, and that really doesn’t sit well with you, because what if it doesn’t?

“Short hair isn’t pretty on women,” you tell him, but he looks entirely perplexed at your statement, as if he finds it to be absurd.

“According to who? You?”

“Everyone,” a lot of men, mostly, and some women. Juyeon didn’t like it either, you knew that. He’d told you once when one of your female acquaintances had cut her hair and he looked at her like she’d grown two heads. 

“I think some women look better with short hair,” he tells you but you don’t really buy it. Then again, you don’t really know Changmin’s type, and once again you’re reminded of his date. Maybe you could ask now, right? 

“Did your date have short hair?”

Subtle. You could laugh at yourself, laugh at how pathetic you’d become and how Changmin was often the reason for your downfall. Of course he was, and you cursed yourself for ever agreeing to kick him out of that forsaken party months ago. 

“She did not, no. Unless you consider a little over the shoulder short.”

“I do,” he sighs again and maybe you want to smile because honestly, it is a little funny at this point, how quick he is to be annoyed and how quick you are to be the same, “did it go well?”

“Do you really want to know about my dating life?”

“I’m just trying to make conversation,” you lie, because honestly you were really curious to know. You wanted to know what she looked like, if she was beautiful, more so than you. 

“It was fine. Didn’t really have much chemistry,” he tells you, adjusting his glasses briefly as he dusts off some of your cut hair from your back. 

“You mean like sexually?”

“What? No. I mean in general. Chemistry isn’t just sex,” to you, it was most of it. At least you believed it to be. Good chemistry came from desire and lust, which is why you and Juyeon had worked so great when you were in love. You wanted to answer, maybe even defend yourself where he didn’t know you had to, but instead you kept your mouth shut, “I’m going to cut more now.”

“A lot?”

“I think if I play my cards right, it’ll just about be touching your shoulder,” he answers you and you agree, sighing as you adjust the way you sit again and watch him in the mirror. 

You watched the way he concentrated, how he bit his lower lip and occasionally adjusted his glasses if he leaned forward too much. He seemed so intent on doing well that it calmed you just a little. At least he would try, you assumed, and all you’d have to do in return was get his groceries. 

You were both silent for a long time, simply watching his hands move between strands of hair, trying not to tug too much or break off more hair with what was burnt. The music wasn’t overbearingly loud, and your cat was soft asleep now, sprawled out comfortably in your duvet. It was all very peaceful, strangely so. 

You came to realise even more in such silence that Changmin really was just so pretty. 

“You’re staring at me,” he tells you, not once making eye contact with you and yet he’d caught you. 

“What am I meant to look at?”

“I was only telling you.”

“Does it bother you?”

He stops, meeting your eyes in the mirror and suddenly you look away, “no, I don’t really care.”

You both fall silent again and you watch as he fixes the broken ends and frowns when it doesn’t seem to be going how he wants it to. Seeing him concentrate is a little amusing, because his nose occasionally scrunches and he lets out a little breath of air in annoyance when it just doesn’t work. 

“Did you ruin it?”

“Do you really want the truth?”

“Changmin, what the fuck did you do?” 

He laughs, and it sounds so happy and amused you turn around and hit his arm, making him jump back and hunch over even more to clutch his stomach while he chuckles. You want to know what the hell is so funny when he’s potentially done worse to you, but he doesn’t say a single word. 

“Changmin!”

“It’s nothing. I just find your lack of faith in me hilarious,” your arms cross and some of your hair falls to your face, but to your surprise it seems shockingly neat. 

“I was just going to say that I was right. Short hair suits you,” you heart lurches forward again and you’re stunned on what to say. It’s clear to you that it’s a compliment and maybe an attempt at making you feel far better, but all it manages to do at first is make you feel more vulnerable. He’s the first to see you like this and he’s not turning away from it or insulting you the way you would’ve insulted yourself. He’s kinder to yourself at this moment than you would ever be, and it doesn’t even feel forced. 

You don’t know what to say. 

“You don’t need to say that. We’re not friends,” he looks exasperated, like he’s near given up on ever being kind to you and you hope he truly stops trying. You don’t want to be friends, and while you’ll admit he’s not been as bad as you might’ve initially presumed, you would never want to speak of this after. 

“I think it’s nearly done.”

“Are you sure?” Changmin looks at you through the mirror, his eyes finding yours so quickly it makes you stop and stare back at him with strange interest. 

“Mhmm, where’s your hairbrush?” you hand it to him and he thanks you, brushing through the strands with a gentle touch you’ve never even given yourself. He’s so careful, like he truly doesn’t want to hurt you, and you’re not really sure when that became important to you but it makes you smile, “I think I should change majors.”

You know he’s teasing though his confidence leaves you curious. From what you can see, it isn’t terrible, but you have yet to see the full result and it’s scary to realise that your hair no longer reaches very far. You’re not even sure how the hell you’re going to style it when you have to have it up, or want to. In the end, maybe you would need extensions. 

“Do you have any hair oil?”

“I can’t believe you know what that is,” you get up, intentionally ignoring the mirror to stare back as you move to your bathroom, rummaging through one of the drawers before you find the serum you’re looking for, bringing it over to him, “here.”

He nods, standing in front of you and you don’t make an attempt to move. You let him reach for your hair behind your ear, bringing it forward between his delicate fingers with the oil you’d brought him, bringing it to your short ends and you simply let him. He’s never been this close to you, you don’t think, but it surprises you how it doesn’t make you grimace and want to turn away. Changmin’s in your space, but he isn’t invasive with it either, so very careful with his movements like he’s wondering when you’ll actually shrink away. 

“Done,” okay, fuck, now you’d have to look. It would either make you want to curl in on yourself or you’d be content to deal with it, even if you hated the short hair either way. You were already prepared to not like it, but you turn around and it hits you again. 

“I hate it,” Changmin’s face briefly falls, maybe with worry or just genuine upset because it sounds like an insult towards him. It’s the very first time where your heart sinks because you feel bad for making him believe he’d done something horrific when he’d helped you. He looks so genuinely pained, almost like he’s afraid that you’ll turn violent for what he’d done, and how truly sorry he looks makes you feel awful. 

“I’m sorry,” you shake your head, turning back to him so you can avoid the mirror, and you make an effort to look into his dark brown eyes framed by his glasses, the softness in them not going unnoticed by you. The way he looks like he’s ready to walk out with a knife in his back. 

“No, I just… I hate having my hair short,” you attempt, awkwardly reaching for his arm in an attempt to make it better, but it’s awkward for you both and so you remove your touch and look back at him instead, “I think you did great, Changmin.”

“You can be honest.”

“I am. I think it’s really neat,” which was true. He’d cut it precise and straight just along your shoulder and nothing seemed out of place. It was hard to believe he’d never done this before.

“I should get going,” there’s a voice in the back of your mind offering him to stay a little longer, but your mother could be home at any point and you knew very well that she wouldn’t like Changmin at all, even if he’d done you a favour. 

“Wait…” he stops, his jacket just pulled over one of his sleeves as he looks at you, “what about your groceries?”

“Forget it, it’s fine,” he’s upset. Something is on his mind and you want to know what it is. You don’t really believe him to be the type to be so hung up on one of your insults. He’d never been before, and some had been far worse than this, and yet he’d never been so quiet towards you. 

“No, I think I should,” you reach for your purse and while you can tell he wants to leave, he doesn’t walk out. He waits for you to gather your things and then stares at you. 

“I really don’t need your charity.”

“It’s not charity. You cut my hair,” he looks like he wants to agree with you. Like he knows that he did and yet he doesn’t really want to acknowledge it. 

“Fine.”

It was already late in the evening when you got to the store, not realising how time had slipped away from you both while you were at home. You’d thought Changmin had been quick, but reality had been different and time had simply flown away from you. 

“This place is expensive.”

“Is it?” you shrug, never having thought of it as you step out of the car, waiting for him to follow suit though he hesitates for far longer before he finally comes out of the car, approaching you with apprehension, “does it matter? You’re not paying for it.”

Changmin huffs, nails digging into his knuckles while he stares ahead at the store in front of you. You weren’t ready to admit to him that you hadn’t done groceries in years because it was always done for you, and you were not going to admit that the corner store when you were missing some snacks was as far as shopping for food went for you. 

“I don’t need you to spend money on me.”

“I doubt I’ll notice it’s gone,” he scoffs, clearly unimpressed as he walks with you. You don’t like it, because it feels like he’s looking down at you again, like you’re lesser than him when that has never been the case. You don’t understand the issue or why it should even concern him if you’re spending your allowance on him, but for some reason it does. 

“You realise the problem with that, right?”

“What problem?”

His kind eyes are gone, replaced with the ones you know far better. The eyes that judge you, that see you as frustrating and annoying, the ones that hate you and think you’re unimportant. You hate that gaze, the way he looks at you, and yet it doesn’t go away, nor does it fade in intensity, even while you watch him grab a shopping cart and step inside because you simply refuse to do it yourself.

“What would you like?”

“I haven’t really thought about it,” he starts, clearly in thought before he adds, “I need cat food.”

It catches you off guard. Changmin feels selfless, in that regard. How his first thought for what he needs isn’t for him at all but rather his pet. It makes you look at him differently, even just for a moment.

“That’s at the back.”

He follows you, completely silent and now it feels awkward again. It’s almost amazing how quickly you both revert back to this. 

“What does he eat?”

“He likes tuna,” he reaches for something, a packaged box of cat food with an assortment of different flavours and you grimace. 

“Is that good for him?”

“It’s all I can afford,” he snaps back, putting it in the cart but you don’t seem pleased. If he had a cat, he should at least put in the effort to feed him well. You’d never understand pet owners who practically fed Mcdonald’s to them in jelly form. 

“I’m paying for it.”

“And I’m not changing his diet for a week or two just because it’s not on my dime,” well, you lost that argument, albeit begrudgingly because you didn’t agree with it. 

“Can I at least choose some treats for him?”

“Do whatever you want, princess,” you freeze up, briefly reminded of Juyeon and his voice and the way he calls you princess. How that’s his thing to do, not Changmin’s, nor anyone else’s. You didn’t want anyone else to call you that, yet you were so frozen in place by surprise that you couldn’t tell him to stop. Instead, you fall silent and pick something out for him that you hope he’ll like, placing it in the cart before you follow Changmin to another aisle. 

You don’t speak to him for a while, and it’s so awkward to watch him find random things, and even worse when he finds something only to put it back because the price makes him do a double take. And each time you make an attempt to offer to get it anyway or tell him it really doesn’t make a difference to you, he gives you a look of such discontent, like he wants you to keep your mouth shut and it surprises even you that you do. 

You were stubborn and weren’t one to back down, and yet you would find it so embarrassing if an argument ensued between you both in public. It was bad enough that you were both together with the potential risk of someone you knew seeing it, but even worse if you brought on that attention through your disagreements when you could’ve avoided it. 

“I think I’m done,” you look down at all the items and frown, wondering how the hell that’s meant to last a week. It makes you think again, if he really could make this last for a while or maybe he just really didn’t want to live off your dime and you’re not so sure what bothered you more. 

“Do you not eat?”

“Coming from you?”

Another insult and it leaves you angry, but you also wonder if he’d noticed. If he had, you wondered how. If he was simply attentive or watching you constantly when you weren’t looking like some creep, “I eat.”

“I’d hope so,” you want this evening to be over. It would be nice to go home and curl up in your bed, to maybe call Chanhee and hear your best friend’s voice, to maybe text Juyeon to get a goodnight that was kind and sweet, to maybe ask Hyunjae if he was planning a party any time soon so that you’d have something new to look forward to and redeem yourself and your reputation. 

“There’s nothing else you want?”

“Nope,” you look down at all he’d chosen again and it just doesn’t sit right with you, but you don’t say anything else. It’s none of your business, how he chooses to consume his meals or what his motive or intentions are in not taking advantage of you buying everything for him, but it feels like an insult to you and your money that he’s not using it properly. 

It also bothers you, how he’d seemed enthused earlier at the prospect of you getting groceries for him, how he’d even laughed while doing your hair and how when he'd smiled it even reached his eyes, only to stand here with him now and see the way his eyes seem lifeless, how his smile has faded and he seems so miserable and over being around you. 

“Fine,” is your answer, cold just like him as you both go to the check out, paying for all his things whilst he packs them up. You’re both so silent, the woman scanning all his items gives you both a look, as if she knows you’re both fighting and can feel the tension between you both. 

You don’t end up spending much at all, far less than you’d expected, and yet when you try to pay, Changmin steps up to you, “I’ll just get it.”

“No, I want to get it,” you push him away from you, but he surprises you in his strength and resistance, barely moving an inch while you try to tap your watch against the card machine. 

“I don’t want you to.”

“I said I would!” you snap and he finally stops fighting you, maybe in his shock because you’ve raised your voice publicly, but you manage to pay and the woman gives him a sympathetic look with kind eyes as if to tell him she’s sorry for your behaviour. 

It’s silent as you both go to the car but you can feel his anger radiate off him. You already know he might snap, the question is what his anger will look like. You’re not afraid of it or Changmin, because while you don’t know him well, you don’t believe he’d hurt you in frustration. But you do wonder what he’ll say, if anything at all. 

You try to ignore him by drowning it all out with music, occasionally glancing over at him though he’s on his phone not paying attention to you. It was like having a random strange man in your car, one that wouldn’t take any time to get to know who he was even with, but you supposed that was better than the alternative. 

“I don’t know your address,” you tell him eventually, realising you were just heading back to your place when you should very likely be going a whole other direction.

“Drop me anywhere. I’ll take the bus.”

“I’m already driving,” he sighs, but he doesn’t fight you either, reaching over to the touch screen in the centre of your car to find the navigational system so that he can type in his address. You knew the area by name, though you’d never done more than pass it by. When you were younger, your parents had insisted on avoiding places such as the one you were now going to, for it was full of criminal activity and rather dangerous at night. At least so they said. 

“Thank you for helping me,” it takes a lot for you to say it, so you hope at the very least he’ll realise how difficult it is for you and to appreciate that you managed to say it anyway. He doesn’t react at first, looking outside into the dark, up at the city lights and the way everything reflects, but eventually he pays attention to you again when the trees get boring and a droplet of rain falls onto the window. 

“It’s nothing.”

“Yeah but… you didn’t laugh at me.”

“There was nothing to laugh at,” he made things difficult. It was hard to speak to him, sometimes moreso, because he just seemed so indifferent when you didn’t want him to be. You also knew him to be different, just sometimes, because you’d had little glimpses of it, and you wondered where they went when he stopped smiling. 

“Juyeon would’ve found it hilarious.”

“I’m not Juyeon,” he interrupts angrily, this time turning his head to look at you properly and it distracts you. You were near certain though you’d gotten no real confirmation that they didn’t like each other at all, and yet his instant protest made it far more evident than you’d presumed it to be. 

“You make him sound like a bad person.”

“If he would’ve laughed at you, then isn’t he?”

No. You want to say no. Juyeon was flawed but not bad. He was always so kind to you, until the moments in which he wasn’t but you knew how to ignore those for the good things you got. But then you wondered why you’d broken up at all if he was what you wanted. It was hurting your head to think about it, to think about Juyeon was always so complicated and painful, yet here you were again wondering if you could ever have him back. 

“He’s not that bad.”

“Right,” you’re not sure why you wanted him to fight with you. To tell you you’re wrong, that Juyeon was fucking terrible and destroyed every little bit of confidence within you so that he could mold it back together into the perceived beauty that he wanted. Until you were created to be only his. 

You’re not sure why you want Changmin to say it, because you know you’ll resist him anyway. 

“Why do you care?”

“I don’t, really. I just don’t get it. I’ll never understand wanting to be hurt by someone you think should love you,” you fall silent first. You want to defend Juyeon but you’re not sure how to do it without sounding pathetic. 

“He does love me,” Changmin doesn’t say anything else. He rolls down your car window and lights a cigarette without even asking if he can though you say nothing about it. Maybe you might normally, but you stop yourself this time because your thoughts are muddled and you’re not sure you can even really think. 

“It’s just here,” he breaks you out of your thoughts and you park just a bit down the road where there’s space, watching him get out of the car but you stay put at first. You feel a little numb, frozen even, though when he opens the trunk of the car, you finally snap out of it and follow after him. 

“You don’t need to help me,” you don’t listen to him, grabbing one of the bags before shutting the back of your car and looking at him expectantly, “you’re not coming inside.”

“Fine.”

You’re a little disappointed. Mostly because your curiosity has grown and you really want to meet his stray cat, but Changmin seems determined to keep you away from the little furball, “next time then.”

He seems as surprised as you by your words, although deep down you think you both know they’re not meant. You likely won’t ever be here again, and so the final steps to the front door of the apartment complex is all you’ll ever get a glimpse of into his life. You wonder how he lives, what it looks like, if it’s neat or cluttered, dark or bright.

You wonder if his interior reveals his interests and hobbies, or if it’s monotone and hard to decipher. You realise you wonder so much in this moment, about Changmin and who he is, what he’s really like away from what you see. But maybe what’s inside is too vulnerable for him to reveal, that he keeps it to himself because it feels safer. 

You wonder even if just for a moment, what it would be like to get to know him beyond you both standing here in the light rain.  

“Well, thank you for the groceries,” you hold the last bag out to him for him to take and he does, leaving you to stand there with no real purpose other than to look at him. 

“Yeah… of course,” you don’t know what you’re saying. You’ve forgotten how to formulate a sentence and it feels suffocating to stand here with him. You really want to leave, though not because you detest Changmin in the way you might sometimes believe, but rather because it feels so strange to just stand there with him, with no real purpose or gain out of it, “goodnight Changmin.”

He nods, reaching for his key rather awkwardly and you’d help if it didn’t mean reaching into the pocket of his jacket. You watch him struggle though he manages eventually, turning only briefly before he ultimately sighs, “I should walk you to the car.”

You want to ask why until you remember what your parents had said. Maybe they were right, that it really was unsafe and Changmin knew it too, “I’ll be fine.”

“I don’t care,” he puts his bags down in the hall right next to the door, letting it fall shut after him as he comes back down the steps to where you stand to begin the short journey back to your car. It’s so awkward between you both, so painfully silent and you think back to the woman at the grocery store again, the way she’d stared at you both. 

“Well, I survived the walk to my car,” you think you see a faint smile on his face, but you don’t want to comment on it in case he notices and lets it fade away again, “goodnight Changmin. For real this time.”

Changmin smiles. He genuinely smiles and his dimples show on his cheeks enough to make you want to mirror a similar upturn of your lips. It’s contagious, and he stands there as you shut the door though let your window down just a little in case he wants to say anything else to you. 

At first, you don’t think he’s going to. You think he’s going to let you leave but when you start the car, he leans his arms against the opened window and looks up at you again, carefully, as if his eyes are searching for something within your own and you wonder if your cheeks look as warm as they suddenly feel. 

“Get home safe, little doll,” you want to answer but you’re left completely stunned by him. The wave of emotions you go through in his company can’t be quite good for you. It makes you feel vulnerable and a little confused and you can do nothing to help it. It’s simply there, every single feeling is right at the surface and you can’t hide it. 

It makes you feel so exposed, enough that your words get caught in your throat and you have to simply drive away, seeing him in your rearview mirror, and you hope he gets inside and off the street if it really is as bad as you’d been told here. 

You don’t mean to do it, but after a few minutes you turn around just to check that he’d gone inside, slowing down when you don’t see him anymore, nor do you see the groceries he’d placed down just inside when he’d chosen to walk you back to your car. 

Which meant he was okay, and you could go home. 

You’re at another one of Juyeon’s parties and you’ve had a little too much to drink. You don’t know what time it is, nor are you sure on where you’re even going. It’s disorienting for you to even walk, dizzying in hallways you’re familiar with and yet you can’t make out where you are. Eventually you give up and try to roll a cigarette, but you swear you’re seeing double and can’t even imagine the state you’re in. 

Wondering if you look like a disaster, you try to see if you recognise anyone, though you’re alone aside from a couple making out not too far away from you. It bothers you a little, but you don’t want to bring their attention towards you and instead remain silently sat on the hardwood floor, beautifully dark and expensive. The music is still loud so you figure you must still be close to the main living room but you can’t be sure. 

“Little princess, I’ve been trying to find you,” Juyeon’s worried voice breaks you out of whatever daze you’re in, looking up to see him stand there in his dress shirt that clings tight to his thin waist. He’s beautiful, of course, and you become aware of the state you must look like, now that something so gorgeous is in front of you. 

What is happening to you?

“Am fine,” you mumble, wanting to close your eyes as much as you want to go outside to have a cigarette. 

“You look awful,” you know. He doesn’t need to tell you, and yet when he does it stings deep and makes you wish he hadn’t said anything at all. You wish for just a moment that he’d lie to you and tell you otherwise, in a way that makes you think that the opposite might be true. 

You want Juyeon to tell you that you’re pretty. 

“I know,” he stares at you, silently first before he crouches down to your level. Your eyes meet and his are dark but pretty, a certain glazed spark that makes you want to kiss him, but you don’t. 

“I can take you to my room,” you nod, holding your hand out to him so he can help you to your feet, and you stumble into his chest when gravity decides to not be in your favour, “when did you turn into such a drinker?”

You’re not sure, really, what had made you drink so excessively tonight, but Juyeon knew that you drank and could drink a lot so the question still takes you aback. Does he think you’ve gone off the rails? 

“Am not…” though your lack of coordination and the fact that you feel increasingly ill from being intoxicated seems to suggest otherwise. Remembering how much you’ve had would be impossible to decipher so you wouldn’t even attempt it. 

“Here… you should shower first.”

“Don’t wanna…” as if you’d trust yourself to even stand upright in the shower, but Juyeon seems just as persistent as you. 

“I’m not letting you in my bed in this state,” you scoff, thinking it’s unbelievable that his first concern would be his silken bed sheets though simultaneously you know you’d be just the same. No way you’d ever let someone this drunk on your mattress with the chance that they’d be sick. You understood perfectly, and yet it still made you angry. 

“Why’d you care so little about me?”

Juyeon doesn’t say anything first, leading you to the bathroom and you sit against the door, watching him move around without his attention ever going to you. It almost confirms the question, that he’s so indifferent and careless because you’re not worth even worrying about. 

“You’re being dramatic.”

“Am I?”

You’re getting angry and it shows, pushing your body up with all the strength you can possibly find in your body, Juyeon catching you the moment you threaten to fall back to the floor. Even if he caught you, he seems to push your body away from him, like he doesn’t want you any closer and it kills something in you to have him act this way towards you when he’d been so sweet before. 

“Why’re you doing this?”

“You should go home. I’ll get Chanhee,” normally, he would've let you stay. Juyeon would let you stay in his bed and the fact that he isn’t even offering it makes your heart sink deep, a heavy weighted feeling in your chest that’s just equally as hollow. Your heart is breaking and he doesn’t seem to care at all, nor does he seem to care for the consequences. 

You stand completely alone, looking around the bathroom before you get a burst of energy that has you looking for any remnants of cocaine in any of his drawers. Juyeon hid it well, just in case the cleaners rummaged more than he’d requested, because he did not need anything to get back to his parents in regards to some of his more worrying behaviour. Unfortunately, you come up entirely empty and the door opens to you surrounded by a mess of his things. 

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Juyeon is so angry, you truly want to fear him with how he looks at you, but Chanhee and Hyunjae both stand there too, with Hyunjae even moving to block Juyeon’s body from you. You’re not sure why he does it, but to know he seems more concerned for you than the man you loved brought a new pain to your chest that really made you want to cry. He was so careless and it hurt. 

“I’ll just take her home- don’t,” Chanhee glares at Juyeon when he makes an attempt to move towards you, and you’re grateful for your best friend when he helps you back up, albeit you have no way of really focusing in on him, your vision blurry and tired. 

“Did she take anything?” Hyunjae. You think it’s Hyunjae, his voice soft and gentle, sounding entirely sober and you wonder if he’d had anything to drink at all. Usually he did, a bottle always famously in hand yet he seemed so okay now, you couldn’t imagine it. 

“Don’t know,” cold. His voice sounds so cold and careless, it’s the only thing you can focus on. You can’t pay attention to Chanhee holding your body up or the fact that Hyunjae is right in front of you. You don’t even notice.

“It’s like she’s been drugged,” Chanhee. It’s Chanhee, and he sounds more angry than Juyeon, though for an entirely different reason. He’s concerned for you, but in a tone you’re not familiar with. 

“Just get her out then.”

“She’s about to pass out, Juyeon.”

“I don’t care, Chanhee.”

Your vision is spotted and you start to think that maybe Hyunjae’s question has merit. You’d had plenty to drink but in your mind it hadn’t been enough to act like this. Yet you were so out of it, so unaware and so ready to sink back to the floor where your heart already lay in pieces. 

“I’ll carry her. Let’s just go,” you can’t make out the voice anymore. You can barely make anything out as you feel yourself being lifted up onto someone’s back. He’s warm and strong, a cologne you recognise but not familiar enough with for it to belong to Chanhee. If it’s not your best friend and it isn’t Juyeon, it had to have been Hyunjae. 

You hope it’s Hyunjae. He’s the one you’d trust the most after the two other men in the room with you. 

You don’t remember falling asleep nor do you remember waking up, but there’s a sharp cold breeze and wind blowing through your short cut hair, earrings swaying with every step of the man who’s carrying you. 

“Should we take her to the hospital?”

“I think she just needs to sleep,” you think that’s Hyunjae. You hope it is. He’s so comfortable to hold and so warm if that’s the case. 

“I can’t believe Juyeon’s such an ass he can’t even let her crash in his bed.”

“I’m gonna talk to him about that,” the voice closest to you tells your best friend. At least you presume it to be. Eventually you let your eyes reopen, nuzzling deeper against Hyunjae’s shoulder once you confirm it really is him.

“You’re awake,” your best friend looks at you with a concerned gaze that has you wanting to turn away. You don’t like that look of pity and concern for your state. You’d much rather ignore the mess you are in favour of pretending it never happened. 

“Hi pretty,” Hyunjae says, turning his head slightly to look back at you. You have to admit it’s incredibly nice to walk with them like this though you’re not sure why they didn’t just get your driver or one of their own, “we’re nearly at my place”

“Mhmm, why didn’t we uber?”

“Figured you could use the fresh air. It’s not much further,” Hyunjae answers, Chanhee walking in silence with you both. 

“You’re really sweet Hyunjae,” you feel him laugh, the vibrations in his chest reaching you and it makes you smile against him. It’s nice, the way he laughs, the way it reaches deep in his chest and sounds so low and carefree. 

“That I am, darling.”

You make it to Hyunjae’s place not long after and you’re not really sure what happens beyond that. You think you remember Chanhee asking if he could stay in the bathroom with you while you shower, just in case you fall or hurt yourself, and you do remember agreeing and even telling him to leave the door open in case Hyunjae had to come in to help. 

After that, it becomes a little more muddled, though you do get a change of clothes from Hyunjae that swallow you whole because he’d already warned you ahead of time that it was too large for him too, and then you’re curled up in the centre of his bed with both your friends on either side of you. 

You’re turned facing Chanhee, far less space between you and your best friend than you and Hyunjae, though Hyunjae had insisted on keeping a larger distance because he didn’t want you to feel weird about sharing a bed with him. He was right, it was a little weird at first to be in bed with him, but you got used to it quickly because you think he made a joke and you know you laughed and then you must’ve fallen asleep before they followed suit. 

And suddenly you didn’t mind it at all.

You swear you’d been hungover for two days after that cursed party at Juyeon’s house. When you had first woken up in Hyunjae’s bed, you’d still felt drunk, and that drunk feeling turned into being hungover with a throbbing headache and the following day it still persisted. It had persisted but you needed to catch up on a lot of studying, having put it on the back burner long enough that soon your parents would notice and say something, or worse, take your allowance from you. 

So you found yourself back at the library, overdressed to compensate and hide how absolutely shit you felt from the amount you’d had to drink, trying to find somewhere to sit. You decided to sit on a table far in the corner, away from everyone yet still within sight of the main area, opening your laptop up and grabbing one of your many notebooks and one of your textbooks. 

You think an hour goes by when you briefly leave to grab a coffee from the cafe just down the street, coming back with a warm drink and another painkiller down your throat because the headache persisted and you had at least a few more hours to study before you could tell yourself it was enough. 

It hadn’t even been a minute since you’d sat when a shadow of a person stood across from you, completely still first as if debating before he speaks, presumably towards you, “you don’t mind, right?”

You raise your head to see Changmin with a coffee from the same place you’d just been to, his hair wet from rain and his glasses a little slanted, his hoodie too large for his body and covering even his palms to imitate little paws. 

“I guess it’s fine,” he sits diagonally to you, adjusting his glasses and you just stare as he gets his books and a notebook out, full of coloured little tabs and sticky notes. It was colourful, unexpectedly so, and very messy in a way. You wondered how he learned anything like that, but maybe he had a method.

“You got home okay last week?”

It’s a question directed towards you but it takes a minute for you to process it while you were in a daze, blinking out of it and focusing on him properly again, the way his hands rest under his chin, two of his fingers twisting one of his rings. 

“Well, I’m here, right?”

He nods, having some of his coffee before he starts to write something. You think that’s all he’ll say, so you turn back to what you’re doing and try to focus on literally anything but him. He was such an easy distraction, and yet he did nothing to be that. 

“Are you hungover?” Shit.

Were you really that obvious, or was Changmin just that good at guessing? You honestly couldn’t tell, and you weren’t sure what you favoured less. 

“I look like shit, don’t I?” Changmin surprises you when he smiles, not in a way that tells you he agrees but in a way that tells you he’s amused. Like he genuinely finds it funny that that was your conclusion to his question. 

“Is that what I said?” Well, no, you supposed not, but it surely felt like it first when he’d posed the question, “you just look a little out of it.”

You were. God, you were so fucking over everything and you couldn’t fully describe or explain what was happening to you. Something was, but you couldn't control it nor did you control your feelings or outcomes of the situations you put yourself in when you didn’t need to be in them. 

“I am, yeah,” he opens the lid of his coffee, as if trying to reach the foam that normally clings to the lid of the cup like glue. You stare at him again like a bad habit, only realising after a while that neither of you are attempting to argue with the other and maybe you don’t detest him so much. 

Just maybe. 

“Juyeon’s, right? I heard about it,” you look away from him in favour of finding your coffee and having some of it before it gets too cold and bitter to taste. You’re not sure what to answer to that, not more than a nod because it feels weird to know that he wouldn’t even have been invited yet he knows that it happened and that you were there. 

“Yeah,” it sounds weak and you try to clear your throat, coughing instead as a result and turning your eyes back to the words in front of you, the mathematical equations that make you want to die the longer you look at them and the scribbles you’re trying to decipher even though you were the one to put them there. 

“You look confused.”

“I am confused,” you tell him, and he surprises you by getting up and coming over to you, hovering into your personal space before you can ask him what the hell he’s doing. He’s close but never too close, and you hope no one is watching you both or peering in to the fact that you’re being friendly. “I can solve it for you if you want,” now it’s your turn to be amused and laugh, because no way in hell is Changmin able to look at your notes with anything other than a giant question mark over his head, “What? You think I don’t know how to do mathematical analysis?”

“Honestly, no,” you confess, and he looks at you strangely before reaching over for one of his pens. 

“I can do the first one. It’ll help you figure out the second question,” you’re not sure why you agree or why you let him so easily take control of your notebook, but he does and you don’t say anything first, watching the way he writes out the equation. His motions are so fluid, the way his fingers grip the pen with confidence in what he writes. There doesn’t seem to be a single mistake as he writes, like he knows exactly how to get the answer and it amazes you. 

“I didn’t know you were smart,” you’d meant it as a genuine compliment and genuine amazement but it’s clear to you that it sounds quite backhanded, which you suppose mirrors your personality towards him more. He doesn’t flinch, ignoring you entirely before he pushes your notes back to you.

“There you go,” he gets up before you can even say thank you, and it’s the sudden absence of his presence beside you that makes you realise you didn’t mind him in your space at all. You feel like you should, that you did just recently, but his closeness to you had felt like a safe presence, not a familiarity yet and not foreign enough to make you alert to it. 

It was just sort of there. He just sort of existed with you. 

“Thank you,” you’ve never sounded so sincere with him before, not that you had ever wanted to be nor meant it, but even when he’d been kind enough to cut your hair and not fuck it up, even then you hadn’t thanked him the way you did now, even if you’d argue that that gesture was far more important to you than this.

“You really don’t need to thank me. I find it weird,” what a way to ruin it. You roll your eyes and turn back to your work instead, using his method of solving the equation to help you figure out the rest. His handwriting was a little sloppy but you could read it fairly well, though the few times you struggle you still refused to ask him to tell you outright what it meant.

“How’s your cat?”

“You don’t have to make conversation either,” he adds, but it doesn’t sound troubled or annoyed, rather a statement that you don’t have to put in effort where you don’t want to. And then you wonder why you’re putting in any effort at all so suddenly, “he’s fine. How’s yours?”

“She’s fine.” “That’s good,” he never once looks up at you and it’s starting to bother you. Are you that ugly, that he simply didn’t want to see you at all? Was there something about you that was so easy to detest that even someone like Changmin couldn’t find it in himself to be decent and meet your eyes?

It’s like he could sense your thoughts and your bitterness of his refusal to meet your eyes, because suddenly his deep brown ones were staring into your own and you found it almost overwhelming to meet his gaze. His eye contact lingered and he didn’t falter with it, and eventually the way he stared back at you became too intense and you had to look away. 

“You’re terrible with eye contact,” you were, he was right. It wasn’t very comfortable for you, and the longer someone lingered on you, the worse it got unless you were angry and intimidating someone. 

“It’s weird to stare at someone.”

“You stared at me first,” fuck, so he’d noticed it. Of course he had. You knew what it was like, to feel that stare of someone enough so that you tried to find where it was coming from. In this case, Changmin had felt it yet there hadn’t been enough people around to hide that it was you. He knew instantly, because it had been obvious. 

“I daydream.”

“How cute,” it sounds sarcastic coming from his lips. You don’t think he genuinely finds you cute. Honestly, you’d take it as an insult if he did. Cute was for animals, not for a grown woman, and so you were glad to know that for once he was mocking you.

There’s no words said between either of you for a while. You finish your coffee and he finishes his, and after a while he gets up and grabs both empty cups once he’s sure there’s nothing left in yours, “where’re you going?”

“Bin,” he leaves you alone and you’re left staring at him dumbly, watching his figure disappear behind rows of books and shelves. But then he doesn’t come back, and a few minutes turn into a quarter of an hour and you want to start looking for him. His things were still with you, including his phone, and you wonder why or when he became so trusting of you. Surely you could take it all or worse, you could ruin it, and he just had faith that you apparently wouldn’t. 

Eventually he reappears, but you only notice because another cup of coffee is suddenly right in front of your eyes, held by hands you recognise because of the jewellery adorned, and it’s only further confirmed when you look up again to see him standing there. 

“You got me a coffee?”

“Why’re you so surprised?”

Many reasons. You don’t like each other very much. His money was tight, that you knew. Or just the fact that it was the last thing you naturally expected when he’d disappeared for so long.

“How do you know what I drink?”

“Guesswork. It’s skimmed milk, too.”

Even Juyeon messed that up. He’d mess it up nearly every time and you could always taste the difference, you swore it, and yet he’d lie and say he’d gotten it right just enough for you to want to believe that maybe you were wrong. Maybe it wasn’t him that screwed up.

Surely it was always you. 

“I really don’t want to keep thanking you today.”

“Then just get the next one in a few hours,” you’re rendered a little speechless on the silent assumption that you’d both be here for most of the day, but you suppose he’s being fair and that it’s very likely you’ll be here for a while, still. 

“I guess,” you mumble, bringing the coffee closer to you to warm your fingers. You hold it for a while, fingers laced together before you bring the liquid to your lips to drink. It tastes exactly like you would’ve wanted it to, and briefly it makes your mind wander on how he could’ve known it so well. 

You’re back to sitting in complete silence and after a few hours go by like that, Changmin seems disinterested in his work and instead wanders off before returning with a book to read. It brings amusement to your lips, an upwards smile that you try to hide under your hand because you don’t want him to comment on it. Thankfully he doesn’t seem to notice, or if he does, he ignores it. 

“Well… I suppose it’s my turn,” you mutter, reaching over for his empty cup before taking your own. He looks up at you with warm eyes, adjusting his glasses again and you start to think that it might be a habit given the repetition in which you see him do so. 

“I’ll have a cappuccino.” 

“Do you want it with the chocolate powder?”

“Yeah, just as it comes is fine,” you leave your things aside from your wallet and phone, as well as the two empty to-go cups and make your way out. It’s a strange feeling, running an errand of sorts you suppose for the both of you. And yet studying with Changmin across from you isn’t bad at all. Actually, you find it strangely peaceful, because he doesn’t bother you at all but his presence makes you feel less isolated. 

You like that he doesn’t really make an attempt at a conversation where there isn’t one to be had. 

“Here you go,” he mumbles something similar to a thank you, at least you think, his hand reaching out for you to place his coffee into. You do so, watching as he doesn’t once look up but his fingers dust over your own and it makes your heart jump to your throat because the feeling is foreign and strange but you want to welcome it. 

You don’t like that you do, huffing in frustration at yourself and your stupid mess of emotions that have been scattered ever since that forsaken incident weeks ago. Maybe you’d have to consider therapy at this point, if the mess that was your mind persisted and the results were hangovers spread over multiple days and heart palpitations because someone simply touched you. 

“Thanks,” you nod but he doesn’t seem to notice, so deeply caught up in his work that you think it might be something important, or at least incredibly interesting. He’d put the book he’d found earlier down and held his pen between his lips, fingers running through his now dry hair as he gripped the ends when he seemed frustrated.

Again, you were staring, but it was far too easy to do when he was right there and practically the only source of entertainment for your mind when your work was boring you to death. 

“Struggling?”

“I suppose,” he draws out, pen no longer between his lips so he could answer you. You want to ask him what he’s doing, what exactly he’s even majoring in because you realise you have no idea. Then again, it had never interested you enough to ask and you’re not so sure if you ever will. 

“Biochemistry,” he says outloud, presumably spoken to you. When you don’t answer, he looks up and stares right at you, “that’s what I’m studying.”

Wow, so he really was smart. 

“Willingly?”

“Surprised?”

“Maybe,” the back and forth felt a little like flirting, and yet you knew it wasn’t that. It was a back and forth simply because the conversation never really went deeper. It was quick because there was nothing else to say. 

It’s early in the evening when you decide that you've had enough. Changmin had left a few times for a cigarette, always rolling one at the table with you right there, making lazy conversation before he’d leave for a few minutes and then return. You debated asking if you could come with him just once before you remembered where you were and who you were with, so instead you sat and accepted the nicotine withdrawal. 

“I think I’m done for the day,” he looks up at you briefly before he stretches his limbs, turning his shoulder either direction to warm his muscles and rid them of the tension from being mostly sat all day. 

“That’s fair,” you start to pack up and there’s something in your mind wondering if you’d end up doing this again. You wouldn’t entirely mind it, as annoying as he is, when you simply sit with each other it’s rather nice and easy. It’s when the two of you start to speak to one another that problems arise. It’s when you realise again who he is that the calmness in your veins turns into something else. 

“You’ll take a break at some point, right?” 

“I plan to, doll,” his eyes meet yours again and you’re left staring, unsure what to make of that nickname anymore. It still bothers you and yet you perceive it as a compliment just the same, for if he calls you a doll, surely you’re delicate enough to be one?

“Don’t forget dinner,” he adds when you start to walk away from the table, and it brings you to a halt. Changmin doesn’t look up from his work, although you know that he’s aware that you’ve stopped, that you’re probably frustrated and that you want to tell him to go to hell when you let out a frustrated sigh. He has no right to tell you that, and yet the very fact that he’d brought it up at all with such casual nonchalance yet clear determined voice makes you think he might say it because he’s worried but doesn’t want to push a boundary further than he thinks he needs to. 

He wants to remind you without pressuring you into a corner.

First you think of saying something, to maybe make a comment back but for the longest time you’re left standing there with nothing coming out of your lips. You simply can’t find anything to say. 

“I’ll remember dinner when you forget to smoke,” he looks up from his textbook but you’ve already turned away from him, disappearing behind the shelfs and he’s left staring after you, a little lost before a faint smile falls back to his lips and his dimples become prominent despite just the faintness in which his lips curve. 

You’d never know that he didn’t smoke for the rest of the night, but you did have dinner before you curled up in your bed with a book and your cat sat lazily beside you. 

Changmin was starting to interest you. Not because you liked him but rather because he left you curious and a little stunned because of how strange he was. You were also wondering how or why he always managed to read you so well, it was all guess work and yet it was simply always correct just the same and you had no idea how he did it. Aside from the thought that he might be stalking you but you were always more than certain that he’d claim to have better things to do than follow you. 

You hadn’t studied with Changmin since the hours spent in the library together but you had used the few notes and solutions he gave you the next few days as you revised. It was incredibly helpful, annoyingly so and you were beginning to feel a little dumb because why couldn't you have just written this out yourself? It wasn’t difficult now that you saw the answer.

Sunday night comes around and you’re lazily hanging around in bed listening to the rain outside. You’re so bored, but there was no party to attend and nothing else to really do. Chanhee said he was too busy and you weren’t going to ask Hyunjae, even though you had his number. You considered it truly, but ultimately didn’t want to give him the wrong idea of you nor were you sure how that would look if Juyeon found out. 

Juyeon. A thorn in your side that pinched and twisted. He wouldn’t go away and you were conflicted on whether or not you wanted him to. You cared for Juyeon deeply and yet he seemed to prove the opposite in return, that you were worth the minimum if nothing at all. The final bit of evidence wasn’t even too long ago, when he left Hyunjae and Chanhee to carry you home instead of simply letting you stay in his bed to recover. 

It was starting to feel, just a little, like Changmin might be right. Maybe the bad did outweigh the good though you weren’t ready to face the consequences of that being true. You weren’t ready for any of it. You didn’t want it to be true, because if it was you would have to grieve something only you seemed to love and you really didn’t want to be faced with that reality. 

The doorbell rings and it breaks you away. It takes you a minute to realise that you’ll have to be the one to answer, as your parents are out and none of the staff remained given the late hour. You wondered why your parents still didn’t invest their money on a live-in butler, but they insisted he would attempt to steal with all the extra time given to him in which he simply stayed here. 

When you come downstairs you’re already a little annoyed. The ringing persisted and whoever it was was incredibly impatient with you getting there, so you’re already ready to yell at whoever it is but when you finally meet the gaze of who it is, you stop in your step and stare.

Juyeon. 

act iii

this chapter was meant to be longer but tumblr said no so I apologise for the cliffhanger it's not my fault and also apologise that this won't be three acts only pfff

taglist: @sanaxo-o @mosviqu @sunramzi @tbzhubrecs @caratsmatic @synnocence

again, let me know if you wanna be on the taglist 💜 comments are always appreciated

series masterlist || tbz masterlist

©️strayed-quokka, please do not steal, translate, reuse or rewrite as your own

[yeonmuse]

Snowed in | Ji Changmin

PAIRING Virgin Changmin x Experienced Reader

WORD COUNT | 2.1k

GENRE SMUT WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ‼️ virgin Changmin, experience reader, oral sex, Cunnilingus, top reader, sub Changmin, trapped in snowstorm, thigh kissing, head pushing

SUMMARY in which Changmin gets snowed in with his new acquaintance and is taught exactly how to take care of a woman.

MORE | a req for yet another anon

You were completely over the moon about today, this would mark not only your first day of being off from work after so long but the first day of your vacation. You had been sitting on the plane, your eyes glued to the view of the snow filled mountains as you prepared for the landing. This was your first time vacationing alone, most vacations you had been on had always involved your family or best friends, so this one would be a breath of fresh air compared to the others, you had complete privacy, the freedom to do whatever you wanted.

As you stepped off the plane and breathed in the fresh winter air your heart felt so full, when it came to the snow you loved it simply because it gave you an excuse to stay inside and enjoy the warmth with a cup of hot chocolate.

The ride through the mountains and trees felt nothing more than peaceful, though the silent car ride with your driver was somewhat awkwards and you were thanking god once you had finally stepped out of the car and onto the property you would be staying in. Luckily your best friend's family owned a sweet cabin and lots of land and it was all yours for a week. As you stepped inside and dropped down your things you couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming sense of happiness and excitement. What should you do first? Maybe shower and go into town later tonight for sightseeing? Yes you would do that.

Your shower lasts nearly two hours, most of the first hour being spent doing more singing than washing. Unbeknownst to you while you had been throwing your own personal concert in the shower, another guest had arrived on the premises.

Changmin was finally able to escape the cold, he smiles as he steps inside the cabin and deeps down his things. Now when his best friend told him that his parents had an old cabin in the mountains he hadn’t been expecting the place to look this nice , let alone this big, i mean he knew they were well off of course but he certainly wasn’t expecting the place to look so clean, knowing they hadn’t been there in years.

The first thing he decided to do was rummage the fridge, as he poked his head inside he found that it had been completely full of food just as his childhood friend had told him it would be. For a moment he scanned the inside to make a quick observation of what he could possibly cook tonight, that was after a shower of course. Closing the fridge door he stretches out his arms as he makes his way to the hall singing soft Melodie’s as he enters the first room he walks upon. Simultaneously you had been making your way out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, both of you entering the room at the exact same time.

As Changmin's eyes landed on you they widened and he froze in place, your reaction on the other hand was not so silent. As you found him standing there in the doorway, hand on the doorknob you jumped and your heart nearly fell down to your ass as you let out a loud scream.

“WHO THE HELL ARE YOU.”

————

“You mean to tell me your idiot of a fucking brother gave permission to someone else when it was just supposed to be me?” You paced back and forth as you rambled on to your friend about how some stranger walked in on you half naked.

“I’m sorry I don’t know that he would do that. I told my parents about it and I figured they’d tell him.” Your friend apologizes once again

“He’s an old friend of his from when we were little. I've never met him but they’ve been friends for a long time, from what my brother tells me he’s not a bad guy.”

“Bad guy or not, he almost just saw my goodies.”

“Well, is he at least cute?” You couldn’t deny he was in fact cute , the panicked look on his face when he realized you were in nothing more than a towel and quickly left the room.

“I swear Is that what you think about?”

“Well sorry for thinking my best friend could have some sort of winter vacation romance.”

“You know what I’m hanging up.”

“If you two end up falling in love I want all the details.” You could hear her say on the other line before you hang up.

As you made your way out of the room it seemed like the guy you now knew as Changmin had been getting off the phone as well. As he spotted you making your way down the hall he clears his throat

“Ah..i'm sorry about.. about walking in on you. I don’t know if anyone else was here. I just called Jaewon and he also didn’t know that you’d be here. He only found out from his sister today.”

“It’s fine, it just..just caught me by surprise.”

“I figured you’d be uncomfortable, so I tried to call a couple of hotels or inns in town but unfortunately they’re all booked and the roads are closed tonight..there's going to be a blizzard so they’re keeping the roads clear.”

“It's fine, we were both invited here and the space is big enough for more than two of us.” You responded and you could see his body relax.

“So you’re Changmin right? I'm yn.”

———————-

Honestly the rest of the day wasn’t as awkward as you thought it would be you both spent most of your time in your respective areas until night time rolled around, he had cooked dinner so the two of you spent the time eating and getting to know one another he was an absolute gentleman and you found something about him absolutely adorable. That would be both of your routine for the next three days, because for some completely fucked reason the snow would not stop coming down and you both were now completely snowed in.

“You know I don't think looking out the window every ten minutes is going to make the snow stop any faster.” He teased as he made his way over to you with two cups of hot chocolate in hand.

“How are you so calm? We haven't been able to surf outside of this house for two days.”

“Relax, we'll have time to explore when it lets up, until then I’ve been enjoying your company.” He responds as he places the mug on the coffee table beside you.

He was cute, why was he so cute? He was sweet and charming and he knew all the right words to say to get her to melt, but why is it that all she could think about was having him buried deep inside her. It had been three days since they got there, three whole days in which she hadn’t done a single thing, all because she wanted to be respectful knowing she was sharing the space with him.

But here she was fantasizing how it would feel to have his face buried between her thighs.

“yn are you there?”

“What?”

“You spaced out for a second.”

“Oh right what were you saying?”

“I was saying the weather report was saying things should clear up by tomorrow.”

“Oh right..”

“yn are you alright? you’ve been spacing out a lot lately.”

“Do you have a girlfriend?” Before you knew it the words had spilled from your lips

“Huh-“ his cheeks heat up almost instantly and he nearly spits out his hot chocolate

“I'm sorry that was rude of me. I don't know what I was thinking.”

“No- it's fine, it's just that it caught me a little off guard. I don’t, I’ve never dated before.”

“Oh- have you ever…have you ever been with a woman?” You watched as Changmin's head tilted to the side and he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

‘Is that not the same thing as dating one?’ He thought to himself.

“Isn’t that the same thing as dating a woman?”

“Changmin I mean have you ever had sex with a woman.”

His ears turned bright red.

“Oh.”

The room went completely silent, other than the crackling of the fire it had been so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

“It’s okay if you haven't, there's nothing wrong with it.” God he looked so cute sat there in his glasses, his face completely flush, you could no longer keep your thoughts to yourself.

“I can teach you.” In that moment Changmin's brain had shut down at this point, all he could do was stare at you.

“I- You-“

“Use your words Ji Changmin.” His heart dropped from his chest hearing you call him in that way.

“Teach me.” Next thing you knew you had him kneeling in front of you at the foot of your bed. his lips slightly parted as he looked up at you in awe.

Now that you were close enough to stare at his delicate features, you found yourself amazed at the sight of his him,

Sliding over the edge of the mattress, he watches as you lean forward to grab his face between your palms, ghosting your lips over his as a soft chuckle escapes your lips as soon as Changmin takes a breath, his entire body shivering from the newly found proximity between the two of you.

“You’re so fucking cute. You’ll look even cuter with your face stuffed between my thighs.”

You waste no time guiding his hand between your legs as he looks up into your eyes, awaiting your instructions.

“Start with kisses.” Changmin immediately obliged, his kisses were soft and tender as he kissed up each of her thighs giving both an equal amount of attention. As he finally reached her upper thigh she could feel his soft breaths tickle against the fabric of her underwear.

“Take them off.” You watched as his slightly nervous hands pulled at your underwear, rolling it down your legs until it pooled to the carpeted floor.

His touch was softer and delicate every brush of his fingertips filled with adoration as he looked up into your eyes.

“Now go in and use your-“ before you could say another word it was as if he had already known what to do. he instantly disappeared between your knees to get a first taste of you his teeth slowly grazing the softest part of your flesh as he took his time to explore every part of you.

As he felt you push his head down and a moan spill from your lips he felt the highest amount of pride.

“You’re doing s- so good.” You breathe out sweet praises to him between ragged breaths

Hearing you praise him it was as if some sort of primal instincts kicked in. As he feels you push his face further between your folds he pushes your legs further apart, allowing himself a wider access to the spot you most needed him. He seemed almost desperate, desperate to hear her moan to taste her.

He made sure to explore every single part of you, darting his tongue to tease your clit every time it landed flat against your aching hole, wetness dripping all over his.

In that moment he looked so pretty the entire bottom half of his precious face buried into you as his lips and chin seemed coated with your own arousal. When he finally looked up at you with his boba eyes you felt butterflies. his eyes didn't leave yours even as your thighs started to shudder slightly. He loved this new feeling, and the way your hands kept him tightly locked between your thighs. He couldn't hold himself back, letting out throaty moans while your taste was all over his tongue.

“Fuck, keep going— m so close” you cry out, your hips chasing climax as your thighs began to tremble.

Panting and out of breath- you were suddenly feeling dizzy and for a moment your vision ran blurry. The dazed feeling matched the intensity of your heartbeat as you struggled to come down from your high. As if realizing you haven’t said anything after having orgasmed Changmins eyes went from pure hunger to worry

“Are you okay? Was it bad? Did I do too much?” He panicked

“You literally just made me see stars.”

“Is that a good thing?” As you looked down at him you found him staring up at you, his face covered in your arousal.

“I don’t think you needed me to teach you anything..”

[daisyvisions]

Forget About It - (j.cm)

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. Pairing: ex’s rival!Changmin x afab!reader

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. Summary: After spotting your ex at a party, all you wanted to do was forget about him. And thank god Changmin is there to help you do just that.

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. Word Count: 2.7K

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. Warnings: Smut (18+, minors DNI), acquaintances to lovers, oral (f! receiving), face sitting / face riding, cum eating, dry humping, groping, panty sniffing, mentions of alcohol and drinking, mentions of male masturbation, mentions of cheating (but not reader or Changmin), use of weed (smoking and shotgunning), cumming in pants, pet names (sweetheart, good girl), cocky Changmin (but a hot one), reader is sad and Changmin is here to make it all better 😘

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. A/N: Belated happy birthday to our best boy kyu! Had the idea in mind before his bday but my brain decided to shut off so I'm happy that I got the chance to finally write this out! Proofread two times (loosely). Not me thinking about Kevin saying "Forget about it" 😭 anyway! Enjoy 💕

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. Network & Tag: @deoboyznet

Out of all the things that could’ve ruined your night, it just had to be spotting your ex and the girl you caught him cheating with enter the party.

‘What the hell are they doing here?’ You thought to yourself as you nearly crushed the red plastic cup in your hands leaning against the wall. You didn’t even notice ten minutes had passed just mentally throwing daggers at them from across the room.

It had been just nearly six months since the breakup, a decent amount of time for you to move on from the heartbreak. But all you could feel was the deep ache in your chest as you watched them hold hands from afar, looking at each other like two fools in love. The look he never gave you.

And suddenly, all the bad memories from that time started flashing in your mind. Especially the day of the breakup when you had discovered the pair having sex in his room when you dropped by unannounced to surprise him. You wince at memory of their shared moans being heard from behind the door.

You always knew there was something fishy about their “friendship”. You were just too in denial to think otherwise.

You were starting to feel dizzy, mainly for drinking a little too much tonight but also just seeing them together and happy. So you decide to run upstairs to the guest bathroom, lock the door, and twist the faucet to splash cool water on your face and nape. You breathe slowly and deeply as you lean against the bathroom counter.

“A knock would’ve been nice.” The voice echoing behind startles you, making your body jolt as you let out a light gasp.

As soon as you look through the mirror in front you, you see Changmin’s fully clothed figure lying inside the bathtub, deeply inhaling a blunt before letting out the smoke from his mouth up in the air.

“S-sorry…” You reply as you turn around to meet his gaze.

You knew Changmin. Had the same friends as you, usually at the same events too. You’ve talked here and there long ago, that is until you started dating your ex and he was always insistent on reminding you to stay away from him.

You never understood why, but of course you did anything to keep your ex happy by listening to whatever he told you to do.

There’s an awkward pause between you too as his eyes scan you from head to toe, noticing your disheveled appearance and heavy aura.

“Need some help there? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I’m fine. I’ll be fine.” You shake your head as you try to compose yourself.

“If you say so.” He shrugs before taking another puff, tilting his head up to the ceiling to exhale. Your breath hitches with the way he looks as the cloud of smoke slowly escapes his lips, making smoking appear attractive to you for a moment.

“I too would be pissed as fuck seeing my cheating ex in a party.” Changmin utters out as he stares at the ceiling.

Your eyebrows raise in surprise. “How did you-”

“You look like you wanted to strangle them from across the room.” He smirks.

“Oh… you saw that?” You feel your cheeks growing warm from feeling embarrassed. He nods at you in response.

“Want a puff? You look like you could use it.” He reaches his hand out with the blunt between his fingers.

“Oh uh. I don’t know how-” You look down as you try to hide your embarrassment from him.

“Hmm… If that’s the case then c’mere.” He motions you with his other hand.

Changmin adjusts himself to sit upright as you walk over to kneel beside him.

“Okay, I’m gonna take a puff then blow the smoke into your mouth. Cool?” He looks into your eyes as he takes the end of the blunt between his lips and starts inhaling slowly.

“Y-yeah. Sure.” You stutter as you nearly squirm in your spot. The thought of his face being close to yours making you feel all shy suddenly.

Changmin leans over the bathtub, his hand gently holding your cheeks together with one hand to slowly open your jaw. He leans closer to your face, keeping eye contact with you as he blows the smoke inside your mouth.

You try hold back the small whimper forming in your throat. His natural confidence making your heart flutter and the scent of his cologne making you feel lightheaded.

“All better?” He whispers as this thumb strokes your cheek.

You slowly nod in response, earning you small chuckle from Changmin before pulling away from you and lean his back against the tub once more.

“…Do you think I could hang out here for a while?” Your voice almost comes out as a whisper. “Not in the mood to bump into them anytime soon.”

Changmin’s heart slightly aches with the way your sad doe-eyes look at him. He wish he could do something right now that would help you forget everything your ex did to you.

He nods and swings his legs over the bathtub to make room for you beside him. He lends out his hand for you to grab as you get up and climb inside, sliding down to sit as you prop your legs over the bathtub as well.

You lean your head back and close your eyes for a moment, the muffled music behind the door playing as you control the pattern of your breathing.

“You know-” You turn your head and open your eyes to look at Changmin as soon as he speaks.

“It’s a shame what you ex did. Wanted to punch him in the face as soon as I heard the news.”

“Don’t you always want to punch him though?” You slightly smile, remembering that Changmin and your ex hated each other’s guts.

“Yeah well, even more so because he hurt you like that.” He turns his head to face you.

“You suddenly care about me Min?” You jokingly ask.

“Always have sweetheart.” He smiles back.

You feel your cheeks getting hot as you catch his eyes quickly flicking down at your lips. His Adam’s apple bobbing as he slowly swallows and soaks in every feature on your face, committing it to memory.

“I never understood why my ex would tell me to stay away from you.” You whisper back trying to break the tension.

“Yeah? What would he say about me?” He leans his head on the side of the bathtub, eager to know what you’ve been told.

“Many bad things.” You chuckle. “Like you’re a cheater, you don’t treat women right, you’re an A-class douchebag, the list goes on.”

“Kinda sounds like he was describing himself don’t you think?”

“Now that you mention it-” you both laugh with each other.

“And… Did you believe any of it?” Changmin looks directly into your eyes.

“N-no…” You whisper, not realizing your body is leaning closer to his.

“Good… Good girl.” His voice goes an octave lower as he brushes the loose hair from your face and tucks it behind your ear.

You feel your whole body is on fire. You’ve never had someone have this kind of effect on you, not even your ex when he was being incredibly flirty. The kind that just sends electric waves through your system, raging butterflies in your stomach, and not to mention the growing heat between your legs.

You try to subtly press your thighs together, attempting to relieve the throbbing ache in your core. But this little movement goes unnoticed by Changmin. He smirks to himself, amused with how reactive you are with him.

“I can make you forget about him-” Changmin suddenly speaks.

“W-what?” Your eyes widen at his vague choice of words.

“Just-” Changmin gently lays his hand on your thigh, slowly rubbing it up and down on your exposed skin. His touch making your core pulse harder than ever.

“-Let me help you forget. Do you wanna forget about him?” He reaches for your chin with his other hand and strokes your bottom lip with his finger, making you lightly gasp.

“P-please…” You whimper.

As soon as utter that one word, Changmin immediately presses his lips against yours. You’ve never felt such hunger in a kiss before, but it was something you wanted to always feel from now on. You kiss him back with the same level of hunger, focusing on how his lips move with yours.

And before you know it, you both move in sync swinging your legs back inside the bathtub. His eager hands holding you by your hips as you climb on top and straddle him. Both your bodies feeling the slight ache of the bathtub’s hard structure pressing but you don’t pay it mind.

His hands sneak under your skirt, placing them on your ass as you wrap your arms around his neck. You deepen the kiss further and smoothly insert your tongue inside his mouth.

Changmin groans at the feeling, squeezing your ass in his hands before mindlessly dragging your hips back and forth again this growing bulge. You moan into his mouth, the friction of his jeans rubbing against your throbbing bud making you so wet you’re sure you’re gonna leave a stain on him after this.

But Changmin would wear that stain proudly he thinks to himself. Any mark you would leave on him tonight he would wear it with pride. Truth be told, he had always found you so beautiful. The way his heart would beat faster every time he would see you, wishing one day that you’d notice him.

So to have you here on top of his lap, kissing him like this with your hands in his hair was more than he could ever wish for. Thank god the weed in his system gave him a bit of confidence to just play whatever cards he had with you tonight. And he was gonna play all of them as much as he could just to have you close to him for as long as he can.

“Wait-“ Changmin mumbles against your lips as he tries to pull away from you.

The way your eyes looked blown out and the sheen of saliva coating your lips was enough to have his cock stirring in his jeans.

“Is there something wrong?” Your eyebrows knit in confusion.

“What- No! Nothing could ever be wrong. Just- fuck-“ Now it was Changmin’s turn to stutter.

“Want you to sit on my face” he says so boldly.

“I-uh…are you sure? It’s just that-” You try to look away from his lustful gaze.

“Just what?” He holds up you chin to look at you.

“I’ve never been… You know…”

“Wait… you’ve never been eaten out before?” Changmin’s eyebrows raise.

“Please don’t laugh-“ you cover your face with your hands, embarrassed by your sudden confession. But Changmin holds your wrists pulls your hands away from your face.

“Oh sweetheart…” He strokes your cheek gently.

“I’d be honored to be the first one… Will you let me?” He asks with the most gentle voice. You nod in response.

“Stand up a bit.” As Changmin helps you get off his lap his hands go under your skirt to pull down your underwear, pocketing it for himself at the back of his jeans. He slides down his whole body, his back now fully laid against the floor of the bathtub. You could feel just how wet you’ve become with the cool air hitting your exposed cunt.

You adjust yourself and step over him, positioning your core right above his face before slowly kneeling down. Just as he was about to close his eyes and wait for you to sit on him you stop, leaving a gap between his mouth and your sweet sweet pussy. He could sense your nervousness already.

“Let me show you why he told you to stay away from me-”

Before you even get the chance to reply, Changmin hooks his arms around your thighs and presses you down against his face.

He immediately starts kissing your pussy lips before lapping at your cunt, the feeling of his tongue running through your folds and flicking your throbbing clit before taking it into his mouth and sucking on the bud.

Words are suddenly caught up in your throat as you let out whines and moans. You never thought being eaten out would feel so fucking good.

Your hand instantly finds it place on Changmin’s head, grabbing his short hair in attempt to keeping yourself balanced over him as other hand leans on the ledge of the bathtub. But the vibrations of his groan against your core as you pull on his hair makes it harder for you to keep your composure.

And somehow, best part about this is you can’t even see how Changmin is eating you out since your skirt is covering his face. Being unable to visually see his tongue licking between your folds as his nose nudges your clit heightens the sensation even further.

“Mmm so fucking sweet-” Changmin mumbles under you.

And Changmin is living his best life right now. He can’t believe your ex never did this to you and that he gets the honor of being the first one. He can feel how strained his cock is against his jeans as he continues on.

It doesn’t help that not only do you taste so good, but the pretty moans you give him are just as sweet. And if by some weird turn of events he ended up dying tonight, he would gladly die smothered between your legs.

“Feels so good…” You whine.

Your moans start to get louder and a bit more slurred, signaling to him that you’re close to reaching your high. And without warning, Changmin holds your hips down and grinds your cunt against his mouth.

“Shi- wait, Changmin I might cu-ugh!”

You yelp in surprise, both hands pulling his hair as you feel the knot in your stomach tightening further. The sounds of slurping and his grunting pushing you to the edge of ecstasy.

Your high hits you like a flash of lightning, making you involuntarily close your thighs together, squeezing Changmin’s face as your body squirms from the overstimulation. You hear Changmin moaning against your cunt as his hips involuntarily lift, indicating that he also reached his own high.

It’s the way your body convulsed as you orgasmed that made him explode in his jeans, the way your thighs squeezed his head had him nearly fainting from how hot that felt.

Oh he’s definitely replaying this moment in his mind from now on whenever he jerks off.

As soon as you’ve both calmed down from your highs you help each other freshen up, fixing each other’s appearances before heading out of the bathroom.

“You’ve got a little something there-” You point at the liquid at corner of his mouth, instantly knowing that it was a leftover smear of your essence on his face.

Changmin swipes it with his pinky, quickly examining it before sucking on his digit. Humming at the sweet taste of you as he keeps eye contact. He pulls you close by the waist, making you gasp as he leaves a small kiss on your lips.

“Wanna get out of here?” He whispers. You also give him a small kiss and smile, biting your lower lip as you nod in response. “Meet me outside okay? Lemme just freshen up a bit more.”

“Okay. See you outside-” You kiss his cheek before leaving the bathroom.

Changmin stays inside for five more minutes before heading out. As soon as he opens the door, he’s met with the face of your ex.

“Oh! What a pleasant surprise. Was wondering when I would be able to talk to you again-” Changmin smiles.

“About what exactly?” Your ex gives him an irritated look.

“About how sweet your girl actually is. Sorry, your ex-girl.” Changmin pulls out your underwear from his pocket and deeply inhales the wet patch left in front of your ex, staring into his eyes with a smirk on his face. Your ex’s eyes bulge out, knowing exactly what Changmin was implying.

“And by the way…” Changmin steps closer to your ex and leans close to his ear to whisper,

“She tasted absolutely divine. Not that you would know of course.”

[ourdadai]

oi daí pode fazer locks da seo ye ji a atriz de tudo bem não ser normal?

୨୧ seo yeji ( atriz ) lockscreens.

[mymoodwriting]

Request for Anon (yandere professors New, Q, & Juyeon) 6.7k, yandere themes, possessive behavior, manipulation, special treatment, modeling, nude modeling, photography, blackmail, non-con, dub-con, drugs, foursome, gang bang, creampie, fingering, overstimulation, implied captivity (@starillusion13)

“You want me to be your model?”

You weren’t an art major, journalism actually, but every institution of higher education forced you to take other classes for your degree, so here you were. You thought an intro class for art would be a good elective and a break from your main courses. It wasn’t anything difficult and you thought you were doing well, that is until your professor, Choi Chanhee, pulled you aside and asked you to come see him later at his office. Your mind ran through all kinds of scenarios, wondering why the professor would want to see you in private.

To say you were nervous was an understatement, but you had to face this head on. You took a deep breath before knocking and stepping inside Professor Choi’s office. Your sense of calm immediately went out the window when you noticed two other professors in the room. You weren’t sure who they were off the top of your head, but you knew they were from the art department too. Now you definitely had no idea what was going on, but your professor was quick to notice your confusion and introduce the others. As well as tell you why he had called you here. The three of them had a job offer for you.

“Yes.” Professor Choi explained. “We believe you’d be a great model, and this would count as your class grade.”

“What does that mean?”

“If you model for us this semester I’ll give you a perfect A in your intro art class. And if you do it again next semester I believe Professor Ji Changmin could have it count as your volunteer work.”

“So you want me to model for a class grade and my volunteer hours?”

“We all think you’d be perfect for the role.” Professor Ji added. “I see great potential in you.”

“Uh, can I think about it? I’m not really sure I’m model material.”

“Of course. We do need an answer by the end of this week. If you decide to do it, please meet us in Professor Lee Juyeon’s classroom.”

“We’d need to start your training right away.” Professor Lee mentioned.”It’s nothing too rigorous, so take your time to think this over.”

“Thanks.”

You didn’t mind your art class. It wasn’t difficult, but of course you still had assignments to complete. When you first looked over the syllabus you saw mentions about going to the nearest art museum and botanical gardens for certain assignments. Those would likely be a whole day trip, and you might not have the time for that. Modeling didn’t sound like a bad idea. You’d likely just be wearing silly costumes and holding stuff while the students drew you from different angles. It would cover your class and it would only be a few hours a week at best.

You did think it over, and didn’t mention it to your friends either. In the end you figured you should give it a shot. You’d have more free time, and this new experience could have other benefits you hadn’t thought of yet. So at the end of the week you went to Professor Lee’s classroom. He was cleaning up and was very happy to see you. He welcomed you in, telling you to make yourself comfortable and he’d call over the other two. You looked around, seeing all the works of art hung around the room. They were quiet beautiful, showing different body types and you were amazed by the attention to detail.

“Are these your works?”

“Hm? Oh no, these are from past students. I have more, but these are the current ones on display in my rotation.”

“Wow. You’ve had a lot of talented individuals come through here.”

“And they will continue to do so. I’m glad you’ve decided to take us up on the job offer.”

“Honestly, it sounds like fun. It’s truly a once in a life time opportunity. I could be drawn by the next Picasso or something.”

“Indeed.”

A moment later the other two professors came in, happy to see you as well. The three gathered for a moment before putting their attention on you.

“Alright, let’s get a good look at you.” Professor Ji stated. “Up on the pedestal, please.”

You set your things down and stood on the pedestal in the center of the room. The three boys circled around you, looking you over and then reaching out to touch. They asked you to move your legs, to pose in certain ways. In the moment you felt like their doll.

“Very good.” Professor Choi complimented. “It will be easier to see what we’re truly working with once you disrobe, but that will be for another time.”

“I’m sorry, what?” You questioned. “Disrobe? You mean take my clothes off?”

“Yes.” Professor Lee continued. “I need you to be a nude model for some of my classes.”

“A nude model!?”

“I’m sorry, did we not make that clear? I know it sounds like a lot, but I promise you this position is not taken lightly. I have other nude models, but I am asking you to model for my graduate classes only, not any immature undergrads.”

“Oh… but…”

“Only three classes a week, two hours each. At least for this semester.”

“I…”

“The graduate students are very professional.” Professor Ji assured. “They’re just here to study human anatomy. They won’t be trouble.”

“… I don’t know…”

“Come by tomorrow so we can give you a proper test run. We’ll discuss the finer details, and you can see what you’re really in for. Please.”

“Uh… sure… sure…”

“Wonderful.”

You really were stunned over the news of this being a nude model gig, but you did want to at least see what the job truly entailed. So the next day you came by the art room again, even if you hesitated at the door. The three professors greeted you, happy to see you were still giving this a proper chance. Professor Lee showed you to the small room in the corner where you could undress. There was a wall mirror, a locker to put your things, as well as a clean robe for you to wear. For now you weren’t expected to be nude, but were asked to strip down to your panties and bra. You were a bit nervous but did as they asked, wrapping yourself up in the soft robe and stepping out in some slippers that had been provided.

“Excellent.” Professor Lee cheered. “Now I assure you, there are no cameras in this room. While in class the door is locked so no one can just come and go as they please. I also collect the phones from my grads and keep them in a box on my desk. The students who will be working with you are very professional and respectful.”

“Okay…”

“Let’s run a mock session then.”

The door was locked right in front of you, assuring you that no one would just walk in. Professor Lee lead you to the pedestal, helping you get on it. You removed your slippers, holding onto the robe, not wanting to take it off. They were patient with you, and the room wasn’t super cold. After a moment you took a breath and removed the robe, Professor Lee taking it from you. Instinctively you tried to cover yourself.

“You look beautiful.” Professor Ji assured. “But take your time.”

It took you a bit to ease your nerves, but eventually you lowered your hands. Once you were good the professors helped you get into a pose. Something simple, just a hand on your hip. From there the boys used tape to mark where you stood. Each of them then got a canvas and some brushes and pencils, finding a position around you to set up.

“For starters I just need you to hold that position for about thirty minutes, then we’ll take a break.” Professor Choi said. “Can you do that?”

“I think so.”

“Good.”

At first there was this awkward silence, but then the professors began talking with you. They asked about your classes, and how things were going for you. They wanted to know about you, the things you did in your free time, and why you were pursuing your career of journalism. 

“Information is dangerous but important, and wonderful. I want to be able to share that, so people can make good decisions and share stories.”

“That’s very cute.” Professor Lee chuckled. “Ah, keep still.”

“Sorry…”

“It’s okay. Standing still is difficult, but you’re doing well so far.”

“Thank you.”

After thirty minutes Professor Lee came to your side with your robe, helping you put it on and get into your slippers. You walked over to see what they had been working on, rather stunned to see how they had captured your form. It was beautiful, which was to be expected, these guys are professors in the art department of course.

“For an actual session I can’t really have the students conversing with you.” Professor Lee explained. “I can play some calm music in the room, or if you prefer you can use your own earbuds while posing.”

“I understand professor.”

“You don’t need to be so formal with us. You can just call me Juyeon.”

“Alright, although I’m still not sure I can do this completely naked…”

“You’re doing well so far. I’d ask you to at least do two sessions for one of my classes. If you don’t wish to continue after that, I’ll get another model. Is that possible?”

“Uh… I think so…”

“I’m glad to hear.”

After your little break you got back on the pedestal, the boys telling you to move a little bit here and there as you got back into position. The rest of the session went well, the boys showering you with compliments as they continued to ask about you. By the end you didn’t feel so shy, but then again you weren’t completely naked before strangers. Still, you would give this a real shot, so Juyeon gave you the time for the class he wanted you to model for. Excited to see you then.

🖤

The day for your real modeling session you were incredibly nervous, but you wanted to keep your word and not back out last minute. You arrived early to the class, and Juyeon was very happy to see you. Just like before you got into your little dressing room and stripped. You took a moment to look at yourself in the mirror, wearing only your bra and panties. You had to fully undress and you believed in yourself. After a moment you took off the last bit of clothing you had, putting on the dress robe and slippers. You had brought some earbuds, wanting to get lost in your own world and not hear anything you didn’t want to.

When the time came Juyeon knocked on the door, linking his arm with yours and leading you to the pedestal. The students were all setting up, getting out their tools, every space around you occupied by someone. Juyeon gave you an assuring look as you got on the pedestal, letting you disrobe on your own. You kept your eyes on him for the time being, letting him touch you as he got you into an ideal pose. He marked your position and then you were on your own. Besides the music you weren’t sure what else to do with yourself until you noticed something on the wall. It seemed to be some sort of puzzle, and it did well to pass the time.

At break time Juyeon approached you with the robe, helping you down. The students were also on break. Some remained in the class, others stepped out for a moment. Even though it was only the beginning you wanted to see what the students had done so far. You walked around the room with Juyeon, seeing the rough outline of your body from all kinds of angles. It was incredible, and you found it so beautiful. This was you, regardless of the angle. There weren’t any sort of identifying features either, yet every student was taking great care in drawing you and it brought a smile to your face.

All the students were back before the end of break and then you got back to your position. The students politely helped with directions this time as they knew what they were drawing. Then you were back on your little eye puzzle, which Juyeon admitted to placing for you so you don’t get so bored. When the second break came around you checked on the work, seeing the progress they had made. It was the small details they were really working towards, which was really good. Even if you had continued with your original art class, you weren’t sure you could ever get on their level.

“You’ve been doing very well.” Juyeon complimented. “I appreciate you being here.”

“Me too. I’m not so nervous anymore and this job is… interesting…I think I’ll be able to keep doing this.”

“I’m glad to hear.”

You finished up the session, a few of the students thanking you for your time. You went to get dressed, honestly feeling a bit strange putting clothes back on after just being naked for two hours. Once you had gathered all your things you stepped out, seeing Juyeon chatting with a student. You thought about leaving but he told you to stay a moment, so you did. Soon enough it was just the two of you and Juyeon began cleaning up the room, which you helped him do despite his protests.

“Ah, that reminds me.”

Juyeon went over to his desk, pulling out an envelope and handing it to you. At first you were confused, but then you realized what was inside.

“Oh, no, no, no, I can’t take this. I’m doing this for my class credits.”

“I know, this is from me personally. I pay all my models, and besides, it really is unfair to have you model for me and not pay you. Please, take it.”

“Just this once?”

“Well, we still have more sessions to come.”

“I…”

“You deserve it. I’ll be seeing you later this week, right?”

“Yes.”

“And you have the semester schedule?”

“I do.”

“Good. Until next class.”

“Until then.”

You continued with the modeling job, still trying to refuse Juyeon’s money, but at least you got him to lower the amount. It was nice to have some extra spending money for your studies though, making it easier to focus on assignments and projects. You of course did check your grades for your art class, seeing that Chanhee was marking them all as passed with an A, maybe a high B here and there, not waiting to make things weird, but also not harming your GPA. Being a nude model certainly wasn’t so nerve wrecking anymore, which made the sessions all the easier. Things were going smoothly until they got a bit complicated.

“Uh… hi…”

“Hm? Oh, hello, do I know you?”

“Well, kinda…”

After a session someone outside the classroom caught your attention. They didn’t seem familiar, but also weren’t entirely a stranger.

“You’ve modeled for a few of my classes now and I was wondering if I could get your name? Perhaps your number?”

“Sunwoo, aren’t you supposed to be in class right now?”

“Huh? Oh, hi Professor Ji. My current class was actually canceled and-”

“You should be studying for exams, nout lounging around the art department. Go on now.”

“Uh, yes, professor.”

Sunwoo glanced back at you, giving you an apologetic smile before heading off. Now it was just you and Changmin.

“You didn’t have to scold him like that.”

“I did. It’s not appropriate for any students to try and form a relationship with you. They’ve seen you without clothes on in a very vulnerable state.”

“Ah, I see.”

“It’s advice I hope you follow.”

“I think I will.”

“Now I know you just stepped out of Juyeon’s classroom, but do you mind if we go back in? There is something I’d like to discuss with the both of you.”

“Yeah, sure.”

You were curious what Changmin wanted to discuss, but you thought it was related to school. In fact it wasn’t as Changmin was talking about taking you out to dinner to celebrate you and congratulating you on your work. Of course the semester wasn’t over, but you were around the halfway point. You tried telling them this wasn’t necessary, but they insisted so there was really no denying them. The restaurant wasn’t anything super fancy, but rather nice. You dressed in business casual attire, stuff for interviews, since you didn’t have anything else. After ordering you began asking the three about their own careers and how they got into the arts and teaching.

Chanhee was big on portraits and color theory, enjoying teaching a few intro classes as he can see how other students interpret the world and the colors it has. You probably would have enjoyed his class, but you did like the spare time one less class gave you. Juyeon focused more on human anatomy and capturing moments in one’s day to day life. He had a handful of models, both nude and dressed, that he kept in contact with for his classes. He was very serious with his work and he only taught grad students. Then there was Changmin, a photographer. His classes were mainly open electives for other majors, but he loved teaching others how to use a camera to the fullest to take captivating images. They were all passionate in their area, and you admired that about them.

“You know, you could be a real model.” Chanhee mentioned. “Not a nude model, but a runway model.”

“That sounds crazy. I’m not a real model.”

“We’re serious.” Changmin added. “I have my own personal studio not far from campus. We could help you build a proper portfolio.”

“Even if you don’t want to shoot for a runway model, there are plenty of other jobs you can take on.” Juyeon added. “Commercial shoots, or magazine ads. A pretty face like yours would certainly be wanted. You should consider it.”

“I’ll keep it in mind.”

After dinner they took you back to your dorm, wishing you a good night. It wasn’t super late but you were still quiet as to not wake your roommate. You undressed and washed up for the night, crawling into bed. Dinner had been good, and so were the conversations. You really were intrigued by the idea of modeling on a more professional level. You wouldn’t feel guilty about the money made from real modeling jobs and it wouldn’t hurt to build up some savings before you graduate and dive into your career. It would be a good side hustle and money maker since getting a job as soon as you graduate wasn’t a common thing. It really wasn’t a bad idea.

🖤

The next time you had a free moment you went to search for Changmin, letting him know you did want to try modeling professionally. He was overjoyed to hear, setting up a good time for you to come down to his studio and take some professional shots. It was best to do this over the weekend, and you brought a bag of some of your clothes. You’d need a variety of shots taken, although the studio wasn’t what you expected. It was a full on professional studio that had its own employees and ran while Changmin was teaching. You had also never seen a studio like this before. Changmin was flattered you brought your own things, but he had options for you.

There was a room in the studio filled with clothes of all types. He went with you to pick out some outfits for your portfolio, knowing what he wanted to capture about you. Of course it wasn’t just going to be the two of you as Chanhee and Juyeon stopped by as well. Your scheduled time was later in the evening after all, and it would surely continue after business hours. Chanhee and Juyeon were more than happy to help you with make-up and accessories, making you look incredible. You weren’t one for getting dolled up, but you were certainly seeing a new side of your own beauty.

Once you were ready the photoshoot began. Changmin was happily behind the camera, treating you like a real model and encouraging you to do your own thing. He gave a few directions here and there, the other two giving suggestions as well. Overall the experience was fun, and certainly a once in a lifetime thing if this modeling didn’t go anywhere. You looked over the photos with the others, amazed at how good Changmin was at his job. He said he would pick out the good photos and do some edits to build your portfolio. He’d want you to look at it when he was done, and if you were satisfied with it he could reach out to some companies and start working on getting you some gigs. So you were quite excited to see what would come of this.

When the portfolio was done Changmin sent you a message, telling you he had left a physical copy for you in Chanhee’s hands. From there you reached out to Chanhee, agreeing to meet with him after one of his classes in order to pick up your portfolio. It was a little weird going into his classroom as students left, you hadn’t been there since the beginning of the semester. You waited for Chanhee to finish talking with a few students, so you looked around the room. You saw a few new pieces on the wall, wondering about their creator.

“I must admit, it’s nice to have you in my classroom again.”

“I could have remained as your student.”

“You’re doing better as Juyeon’s model. Now, your portfolio.” Chanhee grabbed a file from his desk, handing it to you. “If there are some you don’t want, let Changmin know. We’re all eager to see your career grow.”

“This is more of a side job than career. It never hurts to make money.”

“You do have a point.”

“Alright then, I’ll be off. I have a class to get to.”

“I’ll see you later.”

“Yup.”

On your way out of the classroom you checked the time, seeing you had half an hour before you had to be somewhere else. You opened up the file, seeing the pictures you had taken, once again reminded Changmin was a good photographer.

“You’re y/n, aren’t you?”

“Huh? Do I know you?” 

“We’re in the same class, or at least we’re supposed to be.”

“What? I don’t understand.”

“Me neither. Your name is still registered as part of Professor Choi’s intro class despite the fact you haven’t attended in the last couple weeks. You’re even getting grades, that’s odd don’t you think?”

“And what’s your problem?”

“Are you sleeping with the professor?”

“What the fuck is wrong with you!?”

“So I’m right.”

“You-”

“What is the commotion out here?” Chanhee stepped out of his classroom. “What are you two yelling about? There are other classes in progress.”

“I’m just concerned about one of my fellow classmates. It’s my duty to maintain the university’s reputation.”

“I don’t see why yelling at another does that. You should focus on your own studies, but if something troubles you then report it with the department administrator.”

“I will.”

The girl turned around and stormed off. You were still shocked over her words, but now you were worried about what she would tell the administrator. The modeling in exchange for a grade probably wasn’t sanctioned.

“Shouldn’t you have said something else? She’s gonna tell the administrator and get you in trouble.”

“She won’t.”

“Chanhee-”

“Don’t you know who the administrator is?”

“Uh… no, this isn’t my-”

“It’s Changmin.”

“Oh… that actually explains a lot…”

“So don’t worry about that girl, let’s just focus on your future modeling career.”

“Sure.”

After looking through the portfolio photos you messaged Changmin with a few suggestions but gave him the go ahead to send your information out there to see if anyone was interested. You honestly didn’t expect to get anything, but a few days later Changmin mentioned  a potential modeling job. Of course everything was still your choice, so he was just giving you the details. Honestly the money wasn’t bad, and these were all small jobs, so you did what came up. Some were easier than others, and some didn’t involve showing your face. Overall the side job was fun, and you always had one of the three boys accompanying you.

Although as exams and the end of the semester was approaching, you had to decline a few here and there. You needed the time to yourself to study, and still do your original job for Juyeon’s classes. Things were going well, and you felt that you had a pretty good balance in your life. If you kept this up you’d be in a good position come graduation. Of course you were stressed but not as much as you could be. After your last session of the week with Juyeon you hung around his classroom, helping him clean up. It had become a habit and it was a little moment where you could focus on a small task and not your own grades.

“You’ve really gotten better with modeling.”

“Thanks. I’ve gotten better with practice.”

“You have, although you haven’t been doing many modeling jobs as of late.”

“I have to focus on my studies.”

“Why? A pretty face like you doesn’t need brains.”

“… uh, what?”

“You’re better off as a model, than a little journalist. If you really focus on modeling you could be on a runway in months.”

“…”

You were rendered speechless, not sure if this was actually happening right now. Juyeon’s words couldn’t be real but either way, you needed to leave. You grabbed your things, getting his attention, so he quickly went over to you, grabbing your arm and preventing you from leaving.

“Hey, where are you going?”

“Let go.”

“I was planning dinner for all of us tonight.”

“I’m good, now let go!”

“What-”

“I said let go!”

You yanked your arm free and stormed towards the door, only to watch it open it on its own. Chanhee and Changmin walked in, smiles on their faces, until they sensed the tension in the air and saw your expression.

“What’s wrong?” Changmin asked. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing.” You stammered. “I was just leaving.”

“What about dinner?”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Come on, dinner won’t hurt.” Juyeon said.

“…”

“Y/n, what happened?” Chanhee questioned. “You don’t-”

“I told her she’d be better off as a model.” Juyeon admitted. “I guess she didn’t like that.”

“…”

“It’s not a bad idea.” Changmin added. “You’ve been-”

“I don’t want to model, I quit.”

You tried to walk away, but Chanhee held you back this time. You didn’t wanna argue anymore, but when you tried to free yourself Chanhee’s grip only got tighter. 

“What about your grades? The semester isn’t over yet. If you insist on quitting, I’m afraid I’ll have to fail you.”

“What… you know what, I don’t care, I’ll take the F.”

Before you tried to free yourself again you heard the door lock, seeing Changmin do just that. Now you were starting to get nervous, getting the sense that something else was going on here. Still, you tried to get your arm free but Chanhee wouldn’t budge.

“You know, we could destroy your career right here, right now.”

“Huh? What are you talking about?”

“What place would hire some fresh out of uni journalism student who has nude photos of themselves all over the internet.” Juyeon stated. “I think that’s a pretty big career killer.”

“There are no cameras in here!”

“I lied. You really think I wouldn’t want to remember some of my most beautiful models? Although my favorite images come from the dressing room.”

You felt your heart sink at his words. Maybe he was lying about everything, you couldn’t even imagine where a hidden camera would be. Although those thoughts were quickly squashed.

“Even if I didn’t have cameras in my classroom, I could get such beautiful images tonight.”

“I…”

“Be a good girl, and strip.”

You didn’t move, you didn’t speak. Your mind was racing and you were processing. Still, your lack of action was annoying them. So Chanhee pulled you towards the center of the room, the other two approaching and starting to undress you. Out of instinct you fought back only to get shoved down onto the floor, pinned as you ended up in your bra and panties. To a degree you were used to the nudity, but not like this. You covered yourself as best as you could, pulling up your knees to your chest when the boys stepped away.

“Don’t… don’t do this…”

“We were working towards it.” Changmin admitted. “We all make such a great team, don’t we?”

“I… I’ll finish the semester just…”

“We know you will, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun.”

“This… this isn’t necessary…”

“Come on, you can’t tell me you haven’t had this kind of fantasy before.” Chanhee teased. “A lot of students fantasize about their professors. We’re all adults here, it’s okay.”

“No… no, I-”

“No one’s gonna bother us.” Juyeon assured, going to his desk. “The week is over, and you know how uni students are.”

Juyeon came into view, kneeling down before you with a small circular thin in hand. You had no idea what it was, but he had a rather pleased smile on his face.

“This is special for you, a personal mix I’ve been working on.”

“Huh?”

Juyeon opened up the tin, holding it out to you. It wasn’t empty, a strange blue colored liquid inside. He held it out closer to you, and then you caught a whiff of it. The smell was odd and began to make you dizzy. You grabbed your head, noticing that the world was spinning. Before you collapsed Changmin caught you, standing behind you.

“There, now she’ll cooperate.”

“What exactly is in that?” Chanhee asked.

“It’s a secret.”

Changmin gently laid you down, kneeling beside you and caressing your cheek. You were starting to feel hot, and his cool touch was welcomed. You leaned into him, getting a chuckle out of him.

“She is very cute. I was looking forward to dinner, but this is a good substitute. You’re sure she’ll behave?”

“She’ll be begging for us once we get started.” Juyeon said. “Don’t worry.”

“Who’s going first?”

“I call dibs.”

Chanhee was already slipping out of his shirt, getting on top of you and placing wet kisses on your face, then trailing down your chest. You moved to get him off of you, but you had no strength to push him away. His lips provided a soothing sensation, so really, you didn’t want him to stop. After a moment he pulled you up to sit, his hands reaching to unhook your bra and help you slip out of it.

“I made a good choice, didn’t I?”

“Is that why you get to go first?” Changmin pouted. 

“Jealous much? As if you haven’t been photographing her on your own. Won’t share the pictures.”

“I deserve to have some things for myself. Juyeon doesn’t share his videos of the dressing room.”

“My cameras, my videos.”

“I’ll share.” Chanhee chuckled. “She’s too pretty not to see someone else ruin her.”

While peppering you with kisses Chanhee latched on to one of your breasts, sucking on the nipple and teasing with his teeth. You cried out in ecstacy, a new feeling taking over your senses. This wasn’t your first time, but a new experience. When Chanhee pulled back there was a loud pop, followed by fingers between your legs, rubbing you through your panties. You whimpered once before you bit your lip, not wanting to be so nosy and needy.

“It’s okay baby.” Juyeon cooed, pulling you into a soft kiss. “We want to hear everything. No need to worry about anyone else.”

“… uh… my head…”

“Sh, it’s okay, we got you.”

“She’s so wet.” Chanhee giggled. “I can’t wait much longer.”

You barely registered Chanhee’s words before he pushed your panties aside and pressed his fingers against your folds. You squirmed, trying to move away, but Juyeon kept you from running. You felt Chanhee’s fingers pushing deeper, and one slipping inside you. Your mouth hung open in sweet pleasure, Changmin taking it as an invitation to put two of his own fingers in there, moving around your tongue and getting you to suck on them. You did so without really thinking, your focus pulled in two directions. Then you felt hands trailing down your chest, grabbing your breasts and massaging them. 

While you were distracted with that a second finger entered you, making you squirm once more as Chanhee found your sweet spot. He was more than happy to abuse it, making you moan against Changmin’s fingers, partially gagging. You didn’t really notice when a third finger was added but you could feel the stretch. Juyeon placed kisses against your neck, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine. The world around you was spinning, but you were more focused on the pleasurable feelings you were being assaulted with. Instinctively you let out a whimper when Chanhee moved his fingers, feeling cold for a moment before you felt something bigger rubbing against your slit.

Your mind only registered what that was once it was pushing your walls apart, entering you inch by inch. You felt a bit tense, but slowly relaxed, the pain mixing to pleasure. The fingers in your mouth pulled away with a pop, letting your moans spill past your lips. Those wet fingers trailed down your body, making you twitch, which just created a new sensation from the cock inside you. A whimper escaped you as you adjusted for the size. For a moment you noticed Chanhee’s face right in front of you, a big smile on his face. Then he started moving and things got blurry. Chanhee moved with a steady rhythm at first, making your whole body shake.

You shut your eyes, hands exploring his chest, trying to get some stability, but you were getting lost. Each of his thrusts rubbed against your sweet spot, keeping you off balance and on cloud nine. Chanhee shoved the others away from you, meaning down to kiss your neck and chest, wanting to leave marks. You felt a heat building down below, only growing stronger and stronger. You tried to say something to Chanhee, but he understood well. As he pushed you over the edge he pressed his lips to yours, letting you moan into his mouth. Your body shook beneath him, squeezing him tight and encouraging him to spill his seed.

You were barely coming down from your high when you heard, and felt, Chanhee pushed off of you. Juyeon wanted to take advantage of your sensitive state, and it wasn’t up for debate. You didn’t feel empty for long before something else just as big and hard slipped inside, pushing against Chanhee’s mess and having it spill out of you. A ragged moan escaped your lips as you adjusted to the change and the sensation. You were still twitching and aching but Juyeon was desperate. As soon as he was settled in he began moving, rocking your body as he used you to satisfy himself. You whimpered and wrapped your arms around him, holding on and moaning into his ears. He felt so good, hitting your sweet spot with every thrust just like Chanhee had done. It wasn’t too hard for him to force another orgasm out of you.

You cried out when you felt your body shake once more, wanting to rest, but Juyeon wasn’t done yet. He used your limp body to reach his own orgasm, adding to the mess between your legs. You felt the warm sticky substance spill down your thighs, the scent of sex filling the air. You thought you could actually rest, but there was someone who had patiently been waiting and watching you with such a predatory gaze. Juyeon peppered you with soft kisses before moving away, leaving you in Changmin’s hands. He caressed your body, enjoying the extra sensitivity. As he touched your breasts, as his fingers trailed down your chest, you gasped and moaned, every little thing getting a reaction out of you.

He teased you until his fingers got down to your core, pushing into the sloppy mess and mixing it all around. Your sense of self was long gone by then, and you just wanted more. You started to whimper, gently moving your hips, and Changmin understood your actions. He chuckled, promising that he’d take good care of you. One moment you were softly begging, the next you were yanked off of the ground and found yourself sitting atop something big and hard. A surprised moan came out of you, making you throw your head back. Perhaps he was in deeper, but you just wanted friction. You moved slowly, trying to get yourself off, but you were so tired, yet so desperate. Changmin let you play with his cock for a while, watching you fondly before grabbing your hips and helping you out.

He thrusted up into you, letting the mess between your legs spill onto him. Incoherent mumbles spilled out your lips as Changmin fired up your sensitive places. Once he got into a good rhythm he laid you back down, wanting to rub his thumb against your swollen clit, absolutely planning to wring another orgasm out of you, one just for him. You cried out when you reached climax, this one making you go completely limp. You couldn’t even relax until Changmin came, spilling into you and happily thrusting his hips as he got his seed in deeper. He placed gentle kisses on your face, telling you how good of a girl you had been, but you couldn’t register much. You were spent, body and mind, and couldn’t help but slip into the unconscious. 

🖤

You groaned as you began to regain your senses, feeling sore, your body aching all over. There was a chill in the air, and you realized you were still naked, but had some cloth draped over you. When you opened your eyes you looked around the room, seeing that you were still in Juyeon’s classroom. You had no idea how much time had passed, but you did try to get up.

“Don’t move, we’re not done yet.”

You looked around for the voice, but struggled to find it. You needed a moment more to have the strength to move. You tried again only to have a hand on your chest and getting pushed back down. Chanhee was still very much naked, but he had a pleased grin on his face.

“I said stay still, love, we’re painting, and you can’t be moving. Be a good model and just close your eyes and rest.”

Chanhee placed a cloth over your eyes, and the darkness just made it all the easier to go back to sleep, but you fought it. You couldn’t move much even if you wanted to, but you didn’t want to give up. Despite what you remembered, the soreness on your body told you more was done to you. So you just laid there, not fully aware of the other three around the room, happily painting your portrait from different angles.

“… please… can I go home…”

“Hm, what are we going to do with her now?” Juyeon asked. “We can’t just let her go.”

“I’ll take her back to my place.” Chanhee volunteered. “Take care of her as she recovers.”

“As if you won’t do more than that.”

“You’re more than welcome to visit, although don’t you still need her for modeling?”

“I can figure something out, but we need to do something about her.”

“Students drop out and disappear all the time.” Changmin reminded. “I’ll take care of that.”

“Oh, I like that.” Chanhee giggled. “I really did choose a good one, didn’t I?”

“The best one, perhaps the last one.”

[tddyhyck]

what about jeno & jisung tag teaming you 👀👀

this is hot ,,, idea time

jisung asking your bf jeno for sex advice maybe he’s shy/nervous and wants to impress someone and jeno tells you jisung has been asking about it and he’s giggling about the questions but you think it’s sweet and adorable of jisung to ask ,, anyways maybe you accidentally mention it to jisung like “how’s it going with the crush any progress” and jisung gets flustered and red and like uhhhh how do you know and well “jeno tells me everything duh” and he relaxes and kinda opens up about it and you’re like “well you just need to find someone to practice with” …. now jisung can’t stop thinking about you saying that like what if you were implying that he should practice with you and maybe you were but you wouldn’t say it to him directly but you would say it to jeno ,,, and jeno is like really? you want dorky lanky shy and embarrassed jisung to fuck you for practice

eventually jisung is between your legs and jeno is beside him and showing him how to eat you out their tongues switching back in forth while jeno gives tips ,,, then jisung’s pushing into you and maybe he’s not getting a rhythm or his thrusts are to shallow like he will hurt you so jeno just grabs his hips and sets the rhythm and pushes jisung deep inside of you ,,, and jeno is telling jisung to “fuck them like you mean it. don’t be a pussy”

ok sry u know i get carried away