#jean's sexualities

[epiceneandroid]

a popkern system member's meditation on xyr butchness

the particular definition of butchness from s. bear bergman's butch is a noun resonates with me so strongly. my butchness is a deviant gender, a gender that is separate from both man and woman, and every other gender, but encompasses female masculinity, and both maleness and not-man at the same time.

like, this description of butchness, as a gender wholly apart from male and female and binary constructs as a whole, yet is also female masculinity in its purest form, yet is also a schrodinger's man gender that is so "man" that it steps out of the male binary...i feel all of those Elements of butch

like. this is what i've struggled to accept for so long. like. the idea that i CAN be butch even though i'm bisexual/pansexual, the idea that i CAN be butch even though i'm "available to men"/"prioritize men" by simply being bisexual/pansexual (even though i prioritize my gf and bf equally)...

like the biphobia and panphobia against bi and pan butches who claim butch as a gender because they've had similar experiences to lesbian butches gender wise, like...experiencing butchness as a sort of pangender schrodinger's woman schrodinger's man wholly other gender...i know i'm butch because being any other way, including femme, including presenting in anything more feminine than a cotton torrid flower dress, which i myself perceive as butch in the way plus size women's clothing is inherently degendered in a butch way, makes me dysphoric. it's not me. it's not me to be femme

but like. the insistence that bisexuals and pansexuals can't be butch, even if they deeply identify as butch as a gender identity in ways other butches like s. bear bergman or jack halberstam have described, just hurts me.

like. i remember my very first gender goals as a child before i was aware "gender goals" existed. they were not hyperfeminine pretty magical girls or feminine pretty boys. they were trainer kris from pokemon, the butchest female pokemon trainer there was at the time, and haruka tenoh.

like i LITERALLY tried to get my hair cut consistently like haruka tenoh's whenever i had hair as soon as i turned 12 and started searching for "sailor haruka" thinking i'd find may from pokemon (lol). i wanted to dress like her, i wanted to look masculine and at the time have a flat chest.

(the dysphoria over not having a flat chest is gone but it's more because my Fatness makes my chest indistinguishable from REALLY large moobs at this point.) i just. past the time when i was 4 and would only wear dresses, i never wanted to look feminine.

i would straight up describe myself as a "half-tomboy". i would try to use the boy's bathroom as often as i could in secret because some part of me got a euphoric thrill out of being seen as or mistaken for a boy while not BEING a boy. i wanted men's haircuts. i wanted to wear suits as formal wear

i was basically stereotypically butch in all but name, including (at the time) sapphic desire; i wanted "romantic friendships" with female peers and even my mom said "you've always questioned your sexuality since middle school", suggesting i thought of myself as somewhat woman attracted

like. even now regarding being apapangender/gendercurry, i still do perceive part of myself as a woman who is attracted to multiple genders including women as my gender. like. butch woman as a gender, yes, but butch as a transgressive, transgender gender overall

i'm bi and pan. i'm transgenderqueer. i'm butch as a gender, butch as an entire system identity. my bisexuality, pansexuality, transgenderqueerness, and system identity do not diminish it. thank you for listening

[likeafolkssong]

being this young is art…

[kevinsdsy]

bonus (kevin day retweeting jeremy’s tweet 🙂‍↕️):

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the trojans social media au (pt. 7): i wanted to make a silly part and then i found that pic of 90s damon albarn and it looked like it could be from a podcast so i really wanted to include it and suddenly i was writing the most heartwarming team moment???

also a few weeks ago i saw @problemduetest4life introduce 90s damon albarn as a jeremy knox fancast and it’s truly been living in my mind rent free. like it’s literally how i always imagined him to look like and the only fancast i will accept now 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ he’s made it to the pinterest board so thank u so much for your service <33333

[noe-clara69]

Can you imagine how fucking angry Neil was when he heard Jean say “So Drake’s not a biter then.”

Because I can.

In that one sentence Neil learned 2 things.

1) That Jean was sexually assaulted

2) What he (Jean) went through was something akin to what Andrew went through with Drake.

I also think that reminded him of everything (that he knows) Drake did to Andrew. I think it reminded him of the time when Drake ambushed him and was paid by Riko to do so. I think it reminded Neil that both of those bastards got of way too fucking easily.

I think Neil put a hit on Grayson not only for Jean, but also for Andrew, Kevin, himself and anyone else who was hurt by Riko, Grayson and Drake (that last one might be a stretch but you get my point).

I think Neil felt so angry and helpless at that point and when he was presented with an opportunity to properly get rid of someone’s abuser, he took it.

[courtmartialme]

havocai for @fma-rareships ^__^ day 1: non sexual intimacy... oh to get to do my morning routine with a grumpy riza.... sighs!!!!

[aerostaticsurrender]

JEAN VICQUEMARE - "She was incredibly fuckable. A beautiful bourgeois woman. Waifish. Like a *welkin* basically."

CONCEPTUALIZATION - Snow Welkin. Blonde Welkin...

[scholliski]

i love making my annual post reminding people that Renee wants to fuck nasty with unhinged men, see you again in December soldiers

[mieeaahhh]

Jean and Renee is still an LGBTQ+ ship btw

[broken-heart-raven-queen]

What if when Jeremy learns about all the mafia affairs he just sighs and tell the others that his step-father might help so then we getna whole ass arc of Jeremy dealing with his daddy issues motivated by Ichirou's business with his people.

[niintendoqs]

Ikemen Vampire sexuality and gender HCs 🫶 Waow I love LGBT+ HCs of the boys so much…

[were-wolverine]

headcanon: dick actually prefers wearing baggy clothes in public and is way more comfortable in them because nobody comments on his body when he’s not in form-fitting outfits

and it sucks because he actually really enjoys wearing form-fitting outfits and feels good in them, but any time he does people stare or catcall or even grope him and he just. can’t handle that after everything

plus the villains kissing him as nightwing thing has gotten so bad that he’s genuinely considering getting a mask that covers the lower half of his face

[miraculouslumination]

Really need some people to realize that just because you struggled with something regarding your sexuality and/or gender, does NOT mean that every other person does

If your reaction every single time someone says "hey sometimes cis gay men and cis lesbian women DO have sex with each other and ENJOY IT, that doesn't mean anything about their sexualities or genders or morals or anything, "

Is to go

"ERMMMMM THIS JUST SOUNDS LIKE INTERNALIZED BIPHOBIA TO ME"

Then I'm sorry but I fear you just need to do this thing called opening up your mind to the fact that not Every Instance of something that COULD be labeled as bisexuality, but ISN'T, is biphobia

Yes, even if that's what prevented you, a family member, or friend, or lover, or whatever from identifying or claiming the label of bi

Queer people living their lives in a way that they find comfortable and enjoyable, so long as no one they directly know (which means Not You, Random Internet User) is being directly hurt, is not a threat to you or your sexuality

[kevgansey]

maybe for kevin everything he did with jean was casual

[stepintothehellmouth]

jean helping harry into the car at the end jean helping harry into the car at the end jean helping harry into the car at the end jean helping harry into the car at the end jean helpin

[vonn13]

Everyone talking about Kevin fumbling Jean, Jeremy and andreil, but I present to you aromantic Kevin Day.