#jason: well duke's dad is a god so

[aalghul]

I actually think a lot about Kyle meeting and hearing about all of Jason’s family out of context and just completely misinterpreting the situation for ages.

Like the first few times he meets Dick he’s just hanging around Jason’s house being relatively normal so he doesn’t think much of him until Rose (an assassin) mentions Dick trained her (presumably to be an assassin) via orders from her dad (another assassin) and goes oh fuck Jason’s brother is an assassin.

Then it just spirals from there with everything he hears. Jason mentions his parents met in Nanda Parbat and he lives in hope that thats a fancy yoga retreat for a week before he caves and asks someone in the league. He meets Jason’s mute ninja sister and just gets a brief “Cassie wasn’t exposed to the concept of language until she was a teenager so that she’d be a better fighter so she prefers to sign but don’t worry I can interpret!” and Kyle doesn’t even know where to start on that one but yikes! Connor’s catching him up on his adventure at the death tournament he and Rose went to with Jason’s younger brother where (plot twist) turns out the whole thing was a set up by their crazy undead great grandma to summon a demon and Kyle’s trying not to hyperventilate.

Basically Kyle goes ages thinking Jason is the most heroic member of his murdery family instead of the most murdery member of his heroic family. He’s so fully accepted that his in-laws are going to be assassins that when the identity reveals finally happens it’s weird for whole new reasons.

this is so funny because it implies that kyle hasn't connected the dots between jason todd (dead son of bruce wayne, who kyle knows is batman) and jason todd (gotham vigilante, known for being at odds with batman). and kyle's never looked that deep into bruce's life + he lived on the other side of the country when jason died and the media was loud so why not

cass wouldn't be mute at that point in her timeline (if this happens at any point after jason's returned. we're long past that now) + signing isn't her main form of communication, but the backstory's still going to have the same effect lol

[callmeizukunotdeku]

Bruce comes back from the dead and wants to make things better. Bruce comes back from the dead and Tim was the one who brought him back, so it's obviously Tim who'll know best how to help him reconnect with everyone.

It's Tim who should give him advice on how to bond with Dick. Dick has always been his idol, after all. Tim would know best how to bring him back, and he does. He gives good advice and the two of them begin to get closer.

So Bruce asks about Jason, too. Asks about how to bring his son back into the fold and Tim wished for a brief and brutal moment that it weren't so obvious who the favorite was.

Tim told Bruce to give Jason his space, to loosen his rules, and make it clear that no matter what the Red Hood did, no matter what the Batman believed in, Jason was always welcome. Bruce would always want him.

It worked. Bruce wasn't surprised. Tim was a special sort of bitter.

Bruce asked again for Damian and Tim had to push down his anger. "That boy tried to kill me," Tim wanted to say. "I hate him and I want you to hate him too so that I can remember a time when we had something in common," Tim didn't say, but he got close.

He instead told Bruce how Damian liked art and animals and loved hearing stories of the wonders of Batman.

He told Bruce just how much Damian loved being Robin. Told Bruce to tell Damian what a good Robin he was.

God bless or maybe damn him, but he did and it worked and Tim wanted to start screaming and clawing at something because that would have never worked if Tim tried it and it wouldn't have stopped Damian from cutting his line--something Bruce did not and would never know about.

Bruce asked about Babs. How should he make sure she knew that she was a part of the family? That they loved her and not just for the work she did?

He asked about Steph. How should he make sure she knew that she was more important than his rules and that, if something else should go wrong, she didn't need to run away?

He asked about Duke. He never got the chance to get to know him before leaving--not as well as he wanted to, at least. How should he let him know that he was just as much a son as everyone else? That, whether or not his parents woke up, he'd always be welcome?

He asked about Cass. How should he show her that he loves her even though he has nothing to teach her? How can he convey how much he cares about her, his first daughter?

Bruce gets brought back from time and he makes things better. He brings his family back together by following Tim's advice.

And Tim?

Tim brings his dad back from the dead and Bruce changes, becomes a better father.

Bruce changes, but not everything can.

That, Tim thinks, is why Bruce never calls Tim his son.

[clockwayswrites]

City Pigeons Bleed Green Part 17

Somewhere in the back of Bruce’s mind, there a voice that was grateful that no one Bruce had slept with had experimented on their own child. With Talia and himself there were already lines that had been crossed, but what Danny had been through was another level of horrible. Which is why that tiny voice didn’t mater.

This wasn’t about Bruce, this was about Danny. Danny who looked ready to bolt again. Bruce reached out and placed his hand on Danny’s still cold cheek.

“Danny, being my clone doesn’t make being my son any less true.”

“That’s not—” Danny’s eyes welled with tears again and he leaned into the touch even as his foot scooted backwards. “That’s not how it works.”

“It does for us. Our family is messy. It’s complicated and confusing and… wonderful,” Bruce said. He spoke slowly both so that his words were clear, but also so that he could find the right words. “It’s a butler and orphans, assassins and demi-gods, sons and daughters and sometimes people who are neither. You being a clone is just one more thing in that mix. You’re still my son, if you’d like to be.”

“You can’t want me, I’m dead,” Danny insisted.

Jason set a pot down, loud enough that Danny’s eyes flickered to him.

“Kid, Danny, that doesn’t mater,” Jason said in a carefully controlled tone. “It’s the same as I’ve said before, they all know I died.”

Danny’s eyes widened, causing the tears to sleep free. He blinked rapidly.

“…Oh.”

-

They’re sat around the living room, each with their own mug of hot chocolate, even Bruce Wayne— even… well, Danny supposed it would be Tim Drake-Wayne, once he had shown up. He had flown through the door as he spoke through gulped breaths of air. He didn’t have a domino on either. They all sipped slowly at their drinks.

They were waiting for him to talk.

Talking seemed an insurmountable challenge.

Danny took another sip of the hot chocolate and licked the sugar sprinkle bat from his lips. He didn’t look at them as he spoke.

“Dick Grayson, Jason Wayne, Tim Drake-Wyane. Cassandra Wayne… Duke Thomas, and Damian Wayne. I don’t know Spoiler or Oracle. I only… I looked up Bruce Wayne on a library computer after I ran. That’s why I know.”

“Close friends of the family,” Mr. Wayne said.

“And ex-girlfriends,” Night— Dick spoke up.

“Right. Red— Tim said him and Spoiler had dated.” Danny mumbled. He glanced over at Hood from under his bangs. Hood… Jason? Hood. Too many changes. Hood hadn’t said anything since he had revealed everything.

He must have noticed Danny looking though, because he sent a melancholy smile Danny’s way. “I get it. We kept a really huge piece of information from you, but we didn’t lie. When we said you had us no matter what Bruce Wayne did, we meant it.”

“But he’s your dad.”

“And that means we're all very good at not listening to him,” Tim said proudly.

Mr. Wayne just gave an amused snort at that.

“Dandelion,” Hood said, ignoring his family, “the first time that you looked up at Red and I we both clocked who you were instantly.”

“Not the clone part,” Red added.

This time it was Danny who gave a little snort.

(Fuck, they even snorted the same.)

Hood just flicked Red off. Tim. “Sure, not the clone part.”

“Because someone wouldn’t let me take DNA,” Tim interrupted again.

“It’s corrupted anyways,” Danny said and suddenly all eyes were on him again. He ducked his head down into a shrug. “From my death. This form I guess it would match enough? But my ghost form wouldn’t be any help.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” Tim said softly. “But also Hood was right, you didn’t deserve us doing that to you right then, even if I just wanted to help. But that doesn’t mean we didn’t know that you came from Bruce. You just came from him in a different way than we thought.”

“You were family right away, kid,” Hood said. “If didn’t matter your name or pronouns or history or if you’ve died or even that you’re a clone. As soon as we got a good look at you, you were family.”

Danny could feel the tears coming again and he wiped at his eyes in frustration. He wanted to just stop crying today.

“You could have been wrong,” Danny said. They didn’t get it, why didn’t they get it?

“Could have. But you were still a hurt kid that needed help,” Hood said.

“You don’t need blood to be family,” Dick said. “Me and Jason and Tim and Cass and Duke… Alfred, none of have blood with each other or Bruce and Damian. If you had turned out to not be related to Bruce at all? Well, you were already family.”

The tears came now and Danny couldn’t stop them. The hot chocolate was taken carefully from his hands by Jason while Dick pulled him into a hug.

“I don’t— I don’t get it,” Danny said through the sobs. “Why can you all— why can you all love me after a month when they— when my— when the people that were supposed to be my parents never did?”

“Danny—”

“They killed me!” Danny roared. He was shaking now and Dick help him tighter. “They made me just to kill me and cut me into pieces! I was their son! I was…. I was their son. Why couldn’t they love me?”

Between one blink and the next Mr. Wayne was up from his chair and in front of Danny. His large hand was so warm on Danny’s cheek. Danny sobbed harder.

“I don’t know, sweetheart, I don’t know because you are so loveable. It’s something wrong with them, not with you. I already know you’re wonderful and I can’t wait to get to know you more.”

Danny didn’t get it.

Danny didn’t believe it yet.

But god did Danny want it.

Danny flung himself forwards, landing in the arms that were waiting to catch him, and let himself cry.

-

“Nose bleed stopped and he’s resting now. Jay is staying in there with him in case he wakes,” Dick said as he closed the door to Danny’s bedroom softly behind him. A sad, wet blue lump was in his other hand. “We’ll try to get his bear dried out, it was in the bag he took.”

“See if the dryer has an air dry setting,” Bruce said. When both sons in the room looked at him in surprise he just gave a little shrug. “Dickie used to play with Zitka outside all the time. I learned to help make sure she was always ready for bed.”

Dickie gave a little laugh. It was heavily tinged with stress, but it was a laugh. Bruce would take what he could get right then. Jay still had a job, so he’d be alright for now. Dick would need to stay busy and close to people, but both those would do most of the work for the moment. It was Tim that Bruce had to worry about the moment; he was being very silent.

“Tim, chum, are you done with your drink?”

Tim blinked up from staring down at said drink. “What?”

Bruce crouched down in front of Tim (trying not to think of how he crouched down in front of a sobbing Danny just a bit ago) and took the mug. “What are you turning over in that head of yours, chum?”

Tim fiddled with his nails now that the mug was out of his hands. Bruce wouldn’t stop it unless Tim managed to make himself bleed. It wouldn’t be the first time or the last.

“Sweetheart?”

“It’s going to take him a long time to believe us— this,” Tim said, the words almost a rush.

Bruce nodded slowly. “That makes sense.”

“And he could run again,” Tim continued, still speaking quickly. “It could all be going well and then suddenly he could be thinking of running again because he’s doubting things.”

“Okay Tim,” Bruce said with careful words. His mind was running through all the times when Tim had pulled away from the family, “what do you think we can do to help that?”

Tim shrugged and looked away. “I guess— I mean, saying things to him is good but it won’t get as far as actions. And those actions need to include making him feeling useful.”

“But—” Dick started, the dryer now rumbling away in the linen closet.

“I’m not saying make him do work,” Tim interrupted. “But until he can consistently believe that we want him in the family, him feeling useful will help give him a reason to stay. As long as he’s useful, he won’t think that there’s no reason for him to stay when he thinks no one wants him around.”

Gently, Bruce reached out and took Tim’s hand away from where his cuticle had started to split and bleed. He pulled out his handkerchief and dabbed at the spot gently. “We’ll make sure to offer him ways to help out. We’ll talk as a family about where the lines will be and what sort of work is alright, especially as Danny is still healing.”

Tim took a careful breath and nodded. “Good.”

“And Tim?” Bruce waited until Tim was looking at him to continue. “I love you and I’m very glad that you are part of this family.”

-

Bruce sent Dick back to the manor after Cass arrived. They talked about what was best and agreed together that for Danny, Bruce still needed to be here in the morning. Bruce knew Dick hated to leave, but he was the other one who could handle Damian and whatever moods this may have invoked. And they were both worried about pulling Jason away from Danny right then.

Once Dick had wrangled Damian, they all had a meeting. Jason joined in with headphones Tim delivered and stayed mostly silent. Alfred lingered behind Dick’s shoulder.

Bruce went over the day, doing his best to treat it like a debrief just so that he could get through it without his heart breaking the rest of the way.

Danny had run of his own volition, afraid that those who had hurt him would find them. He was most afraid of them hurting Jason and Damian. (Dick pulled Damian close). He wasn’t Bruce’s son, biologically speaking, but his clone. They would try, with permission, to take some blood and analyze it soon. There were worries about the state of Danny’s DNA that Bruce wanted them to look into, for Danny’s safety.

There was worry any tests might set Danny off.

Danny knew about their identities, though they did not share Stephanie and Barbara’s name— both girls gave their go ahead. He seemed confused, but alright. They had to be ready for a possible out burst over it later after everything that had sunk in.

They would be sure to give Danny things to do that made him a quick part of the family, Bruce wanted everyone to think what those would be. There was to be nothing that was patrolling or anything dangerous. They would all agree on the list.

When Bruce ran out of things to say, Alfred stepped forward, there as always to help with the next step. “Is there anything specific I should prepare for his room?”

“Blue,” Cass suggested.

“Stars,” Tim said from where he was tucked into Cass’ side. “He likes space. Maybe one of those projectors that turns the ceiling into the night sky?”

“Soft blankets,” Jason spoke, a quiet addition.

“An air diffuser, natural scents like flowers and earth,” Dick chimed in.

“A… a pet,” Damian said, words uncharacteristically hesitant, though he straightened up defiantly at the look of confusion on everyone’s face. “If he is a flight risk, then a pet will be something he stays for. It will also be a responsibility for him that is little effort and not dangerous. Also, when he needs company but the family is… overwhelming, his pet will be there for him. There are many cats and some suitable dogsat the shelter right now, I will take him.”

Bruce’s mouth twitched up in a little smile. “That’s a very good idea, thank you. I’m sure Danny would like your help, after we introduce you two properly.”

Damian nodded, though that slight uncertainty was still there in the curve of his shoulders.

“Dami?” Dick prompted.

“When will I be able to meet him? Properly.”

“How about in a few days, before we move him to the manor, I’ll bring you over with me, okay ayouni? We can bring lunch with us and have a meal together,” Bruce offered.

Damian nodded sharply, a slight smile on his lips. “Acceptable.”

“Good. We will try to have everyone over before we move Danny, which will be mostly on his timetable. For now, everyone get some rest.”

There was a chime of voices agreeing to that and signing off. Bruce made sure he was the last to leave the call.

---

AN: It's... mmm... not great day, so you all are getting this now instead of tomorrow when ao3 updates. Stay delightful, darlings <3

[coldilikeit]

Yandere Batfam x Camp half-blood (Neglected reader)

Dc x Pjo

Part 9

______________________________

It was now morning, the air was humid and the chariots were lined up, everyone on the sidelines was packed with food, every second you wish you were in those benches

"One... Two.... Three... GO!" Tantalus yelled and the campers roared

The Ares chariot was quick, but the Hermes chariot led by the not twins Travis and Connor Stoll, Connor was shooting rocks in between the wheels of chariots

Leading first is the Hephaestus chariot led by Charles Beckendorf and his brother, second is Poseidon Chariot led by Percy Jackson and Tyson the cyclops

No way you were going to let them win

Your sister Yvonne Bailey Daughter of a multi-million fashion designer grabbed some arrows, her step mother (Aphrodite approved) was an Olympic archer, she taught Yvonne everything she knows

Which is lucky because in this race your opponents either throw arrows or bombs, even luckier cause someone on the Aphrodite cabin knows how to make arrow bombs (you duh)

And you may or may have not taken green arrows design but it's not like he can sue you, I mean come on you're dead

"No hard feelings (Name)" Annabeth smiles as her chariots bumps yours

Yvonne recovering from the shock stood up again quickly "You did not just do that", she prepared an arrow and shot at their left wheel, tried to shoot at least

The arrow instead hit the Hermes chariot and it crashed onto the Hephaestus chariot

Well they say it's better to destroy two chariots with one arrow

Now it was just You and Yvonne, Annabeth and her brother, Percy and Tyson

AND CLARISSE LA RUE????

For some reason, even if they were stuck at the back of the track trying to get he ricks out of their wheels, they managed to bypass the other burning down chariots in their way

It was fine, you liked a challenge, Then Stymphalian birds (flesh eating demon birds) started raining down from the sky and started pecking at the campers

A flock of these birds started to attack your chariot, without thinking you grabben an arrow and shit at them...

... without proper space distance, making the explosion close to you chariot

Yvonne grabbed you and ducked down and the horses who were carrying your chariot went feral trying to avoid the demon birds themselves

Percy who slipped out of the race, managed to grab a boom box and played this awful music that made the birds screech, but stopped them from attacking

The Apollo kids took this as a chance to shoot them down

And when you thought it was over, Clarisse came running through with her chariot and won the race

Despite the injuries of the racers and the non racers, they cheered

______________________________

Jason grumbled at the sight of his family, gloomy, "Hey, Breakfast has been ready for hours now, Duke is waiting!"

"I know but I found new information, according to here, Empousa only drink the blood of their victims, not eat them, that would mean there is still a body-" Tim has been researching every Greek monster ever since, trying to find a clue on how to see them properly

Diana had explained this most that covers the mortal eye from the divine world, with the announcement that the gods are real...

People have been starting to get stressed, since the most is still in effect, people are accusing each other of being monsters in disguise

"I don't get why you're doing so much for a fake" Jason glared, true he was shocked at the death, but... It's not like this was the first time (Name) died

The little replacement to protect dad's sanity was dead, so?

______________________________

According to Tantalus, we should be punished, because according to him the stymphalian birds were just minding their business and only attacked because they were bothered by Percy's horrible chariot driving

"go chase a donut!" Percy stomped off as Tantalus continues to yell at him and Tyson scurries behind behind Percy

I grabbed a piece of fruit from a table that managed to survive the attack and waved it around so Tantalus could see

And I ate it in front of him.

"Okay you too! Both you and Percy and the monster will be washing the dishes tonight" he yelled

"what, that's bull, everyone eats" said a brother of yours

"leave my sister alone, you're just mad you can't eat" said another brother

"how are you cursed to never eat and still be fat, that doesn't make sense" said one of your sisters

Annabeth's brows furrowed "That's not fair! (Name) Just ate! You can't punish her for eating!"

"alright smarty you're punished as well! Everyone cleans this mess! And make dinner for Clarisse if you want, a banquet or something, but stay the fuck away from my sight" now it was Tantalus's turn to stomp away

______________________________

(Name): eats*

Tantalus who was cursed to never eat: I'm offended

______________________________

@delias-stuff @sadslasher13 @ellaprime7 @wpdarlingpan @mountvesuvu @chinxinsomnia @nathaly36 @vanessa-boo @bat1212 @ceramic-raven @sweetconnoisseurgardener @dhanyasri @bella-wolf100 @shortnsweetsposts @roseapov @d3sperate-enuf @d3kstar

[zephyr-ro-emenki]

There's so many Peter in Gotham Fics that nobody has touched the untapped Goldmine that is Miles in Gotham Fics. Even better if they're both transported to Gotham.

Because with the Peter in Gotham Fics, you have Dick as either that universes Peter (it's rare but it happens) or more commonly that He is that Universes Richard Parker (Add in Jason being that universes Uncle Ben and Peter's Mom being either Babs or Alfred's Niece) and the Batfam either recognizes Peter's from another universe, think he's a Clone of Dick, or that he's a Time Traveler.

But nobody has Touched on Miles being a perfect Variant/Son of Duke Thomas.

Aside from the Spider based powers Miles can Turn Invisible and generate Electric Shocks/Venom Blasts. You wanna know what that sounds like a variant of? Duke's Meta ability. His Photo-Kinesis and Umbra-Kinesis allow for the manipulation of Light and Shadow respectively, with Duke able to manipulate them both with extreme precision. And what does Miles powers seem to do? Manipulate light and shadow to make him invisible, and release built up Light by converting that energy into Electric Blasts. If Miles Appeared in Gotham, they would all assume that Miles was Duke's Kid/Clone/Variant, and he'd have no evidence to refute any of it.

Duke does technically have a Cousin called Jay, so having his full name be "Jay Aaron Thomas" would give Miles his Uncle Aaron, but we could also have Duke have an Uncle Aaron of his own.

Now picture this:

It's a MCU Miles and MCU Peter who got brought to Gotham at Different Times, with them both being 17 (or Miles Being 15 and him having taken up the Spider-Man role just a month before and being mentored by Peter) and crashing together. Miles knows Peter as Peter is his Mentor/Died and Miles Took up the Mantle of Spider-Man, but Peter can vaguely remember his search for the Vulture meeting an Aaron with a kid Nephew named Miles. And so, they both decide to work together to find a way back, go to the Gotham Library to search up the best way to get Miles or Peter back to their own times and back to New York, and Babs is just sitting there shocked because she can clearly see Duke is on patrol on her Monitor and halfway across the City, so how is there a second Duke with a Mini-Dick next to him walking into her library looking like they're beat to hell and back?

Well, now as both Peter and Miles are panicking because they're in a new universe, Babs is trying to get Dick and Duke down to her Library stat because she is absolutely not letting whoever hurt her, well (Family?/Cloned Family Members?/Time Traveling Nephew's???), let's just say Her Spider's, and not get them DNA Tested and medically checked. And both Miles and Peter are panicking because, oh my God, why the fuck are their DAD'S HERE?!?!?!

And of course they bolt, and all the usual shenanigans ensue with the Batfam now having to track down 2 new possible family members (Clones are Family Too) AND see if these new Spider Themed Vigilante's, who both call themselves Spider-Man, are trustworthy and are trained enough.

[mxtantrights]

Jason finding out his so is pregnant with twins? 🤔

probably really shocked. like big shock. didn't think that when the two of you were trying that this could happen. well, the chances aren't zero but it is low. low enough that it didn't even register that it could happen.

after the initial shock wears off Jason is probably trying to figure out how he's going to raise two kids with you. thinking about raising one was a total mind wreck, but this? This is going to take some planning. fine tuned planning.

Jason was already going to read all the pregnancy books but now he's reading double the amount. there are more ifs and maybes now that it's twins.

this also means that Jason has to make some investments. like two car seats. two car strollers. an actually car and not a motorcycle. (somehow the bat mobile is able to fit two car seats, don't ask how he finds this out)

doesn't want to know the genders. oh Jason is totally the type to want it to be a surprise. he wants to find out when you give birth. not at a baby shower and not in a doctors office.

probably stares at amazement at you all the time. not only are you carrying one life, you're carrying two.

satisfies all of your cravings. peanut butter and pickles? ice cream and French fries? done. foot massages, shoulder massages, soothing sounds to fall asleep to.

he also lets you sleep closest to the door for the nine months only because he knows you'll have to use the bathroom and it's easier and quicker for you to be near the door. but as soon as you've birthed the twins he's right back to sleeping closest to the door.

takes Polaroid pictures of you doing mundane things. says it's for the photo album that Alfred is putting together. (one day you ask Alfred about said photo album and he doesn't have any idea what you're talking about.)

Jason wants to name one of them, and he wants you to name the other. and he won't tell you the name ideas he has/won't listen to you if you try to tell him yours. likes surprises in this instance only!!

Jason probably has to be talked down from painting the room some ugly color. he wants to be inclusive but throw-up yellow is not it!

his siblings take care of a lot of things for him without him having to ask. suddenly the corners and sockets in the house are baby proofed. six month supply of diapers. wholesale club membership card in your name approved.

day of the birth Jason is calm on the outside but freaking out on the inside. he won't show it because you're already going through so much. (you find out about halfway through and ask him to freak out without)

you're in labor for twelve hours. Jason is there for all of it. he doesn't leave your side. the siblings become your henchmen. you need ice chips? Damian's got it. You need a nurse? Cass and Duke have your back. Need to watch better channels on the hospital tv? Tim is your guy.

Bruce talks to Jason while they both stare at your twins through the glass window of the nursery. Bruce doesn't have to say much, he knows Jason will be a good dad. And Jason likens Bruce's belief in him to his childhood with Bruce. Yes it wasn't normal but it was a childhood he'll never forget.

Jason carries both babies in his arms for the firs time and cries. Like silent tears rolling down his cheeks. You start crying too.

Jason's name for baby #1: Cassie

Your name for baby #2: Peter

a/n: OH MY GOD THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE!!! THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS IN ANON <33333 didn't know how much I needed Jason to be a dad until I did this. you're a rockstar!!

[spencerwayne-todd]

Keeping up with the Waynes

Bruce: Alright, here's the situation. The Joker is loose again and We have to bring him in within three hours.

Duke: How on God's green earth are we supposed to do that? It took us three weeks last time!l

Jason: Guns.

Dick: No.

*The automatic doors open, revealing three figures*

Damian: Team Murder is back!

Dick: You've got to pick a better name.

Bruce: Well, Cass, Damian. Welcome back. Uh, who is this?

Cass: Backup.

Loki: Hello.

Bruce: Well, I suppose we can use all the help we can get. Welcome, Mr. Laufeyson.

Loki: Mr. Wayne.

Bruce: As I already said, we have three hours to capture the Joker. Alright, field teams. Dick and Jason, take the rooftops. Damian and Duke; lookout. Tim, August, and Babs; surveillance. Cass and Loki; infiltration. Spencer and I; assault team 1. Steph and Harper; assault team 2.

Dick: Uhuh.

Jason: *nods*

Damian and Duke: *high five*

Tim: *coughs*

Cass: *blinks*

Loki: What's happening?

Spencer: *Thumbs up*

Steph: *sneezes*

Harper: *clicks gun*

Bruce: Great plan. Let's go.

Loki, walking alongside Cass: I'm sorry, I seem to have missed the part where we came up with a plan?

Cass: Pay attention. Very clear.

Loki: Ah, yes. I see. The noises and randomized hand gestures you and your family made was a plan.

Cass: Yes. Simple plan.

Loki: And that plan was?

Cass, sighing: Brothers distract while sisters and Dad attack. Then, you and me capture and contain. Simple. Plan.

Loki: Understood.

*The operation was successful, and Loki is preparing to return to his multiverse*

Bruce: Well, thank you all the same. We are very grateful for your help.

Loki: Thank you for giving me a chance. The Avengers have not always been so gracious.

Selina: This family is built on second chances.

Bruce: And third ones.

Dick: And fourth ones.

Damian: And on down the number line, we get it. We must leave now.

Loki: Oh, yes. I promised to teach Damian some skills of Asgard. Well, We must be off. Oh, before I go, here. I understand that presents are a way of symbolizing friendship, so-

*Loki summons a large wrapped present and leaves it on the table*

Loki: Alright then. Damian, we're off.

*The portal snaps shut behind Loki and Damian, and the rest of the family just stares at the box*

Steph: Is it weird that i'm nervous about this?

Duke: No. It's a gift from the Trickster god. It's very unnerving.

Spencer: I'll open it.

*Spencer opens the box and freezes before reaching in and pulling out Joker's severed head*

Spencer: Uh...

Jason: I freaking LOVE that guy!

*Later, Loki and Thor are watching Damian train*

Thor: So, you gave them the freshly severed head of their sworn enemy?

Loki: Yes. Wonderful, right?

Thor: Ah, Loki? Um, ah, you see, humans don't- ooh, how do I say this? Humans don't usually appreciate severed body parts as presents.

Loki, jumping to his feet in shock: THEY'RE HUMAN?!!!??

[queennightingale]

How to Troll the Justice League into thinking your not human: by the Batfam

“So… who’s your kids mom?”

Both bats looked at the GL like he had lost his mind, and the man had to elaborate

“Well, spooks, it’s pretty damn obvious that all the other little bats and birds you have running around Gotham are your children, so… who’s their mom?” He asks.

Tim looks at his father, a wicked grin curving into his face as Bruce looks at him, begging for mercy on his team, right before Tim blurts:

“Bats is our mom! He birthed us!”

——

2 hours later, and the entire family was gathered, laughing their asses off at the camera footage of GL’s face as Tim said that.

“Oh god- B, can we prank the Justice League?”

“Oh- I wanna be born first!”

“No, Dicks the oldest, he’s first!”

“Wait- would we already not be human?”

The silence was deafening, until Cass signed 2 words.

“Cryptic Bat”

And the children grinned evilly. Bruce felt a headache coming just by seeing the matching grins

——

The next day

“Hey… ‘wing?” Asked Flash as he passed the bludhaven vigilante.

“Yeah?”

“Um… is it true, what R.R said? About bats being your mom?”

“Um… yeah. Why?” Dick said, thankful he had years of training helping to hold back the shit-eating grin on his face.

Flash’s eyes widened. “But- how?! It’s- it’s not scientifically possible!” He blurted. Nightwing chuckled, and just responded. “Well, we aren’t human.” Before walking away, leaving the speedster in silence.

——

Robin was sitting at his dads chair, waiting for him to finish his talk with Wonder Woman before leaving to go home- he had school tomorrow! Thankfully, he felt the wind of someone approaching before they reached him, and coldly spoke up.

“What do you want.”

Aquaman was skeptical of the rumors- confirmed by 2 of the bat kids- that Batman was the kid’s mom, so why not ask a third, KNOWN biological kid?

“I just wanted to ask-“

“If father was actually mother, yes? Well, he is.” Said the boy, smirking if only for a moment. Though, he’d deny it until he’s in the ground.

Aquaman blinked for a moment. “Well… that confirms it, but I also heard that you all aren’t human?”

“Why of course. After all, males cannot hold children in humans.” Robin scoffed, as if it was obvious.

“Well, then what are you?”

“Non of your business.”

—-

Steph was skipping in the watchtower, going to change shifts with Damian, before hearing footsteps, heavy ones. ‘Must be Superman’ she thought, slowing her steps and pretending to fall.

“Gah- stupid tail-.” She blurted, before pretending to stuff a “tail” (that doesn’t exist) under her cape as Superman rounded the corners, eyes widening for a split second.

“Oh! Hi Superman!” She said cheerily as she continued her way, only staying within ear shot long enough to hear him mutter confusedly, “was flash right?”

——

One by one, this continued. Duke wore fake fangs and pretended to hide his smile because he “forgot to shave them down”, Jason (in my AU the JL knows about Red Hood, and they don’t really care as long as he’s helpful and keeps the patrols in Gotham. They think Batman has a hold on his violent tendencies) got a bit mad at Hawkgirl when she was flying by and accidentally yelled “Do you Mind?!” While his eyes glowed Via Lazarus pit madness, Tim was on a caffeine high and mentioned in passing that the whole family can stay awake for a week (on caffeine and spite, but he didn’t mention that) and Cass signed to Dick asking how he hides his ears without a Cowell.

—-

Eventually, this all came to a head when one of the leaguers (your choice) saw Batman drinking Herbal Tea, (Alfred grounded him from Coffee because he stayed up for a week and 2 days on a case), and exploded

“YOUR KIDS WEREN’T LYING?!?

Bruce put his tea down, and rubbed the headache that suddenly appeared, and glanced at the hero who said it, staring them directly in the eyes, before smirking.

“My children don’t lie, [Hero name]. Why on human earth do you think that?” He asked, rubbing his stomach. The Hero fainted.

That night, the whole family laughed at the security footage of the justice league freaking out, preparing to take their prank even further

This post was inspired by Boucing Baby Bat, or so the Justice League is lead to believe by EmpressGeek on AO3. I don’t know how to link things but 🤷‍♀️ oh well.

[yeetus-feetus]

Batfam incorrect quotes (vines)

Dick: everyone's been asking about you Damian

Damian: then keep asking! That whole family cast me out Dick!

Dick: only because you think you're straight

Damian: I am straight!

Dick: well you can tell that to mom, and mom, and your sperm doner dad, and dad's boyfriends, and-

•

Tim: so I'm sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties-

Steph: *falls to the ground and dies in a fit of laughter*

•

Kon: Don't tell your father

Tim: kiss one another

Kon: die for each other

Tim:❗❗❗

•

Dick: *throws Jason's gun away*

Jason: what the fUck RicHaRd

•

Jason: hello Tim.

Tim: hi, Jason.

Jason: That outfit looks familiar...

•

Duke: toss me my keys

Duke: ... I said my keys!

Steph: I thought you said printer

Duke: now why the fuck would I say-

•

Cass: what did you get for question 12?

Barbara: I got 18

Steph: I got 9.5 ???

Dick: I got Abraham Lincoln ... for some reason. I don't-

•

Damian: Don't fuck with me! I have the power of God and anime my side! HYAAAAA!!

•

Jason: iis there anything better than pussy?

Jason: yes! A really good book!

•

Reporter: where do you keep all your gadgets while fighting? It's incredible!

Cass: Belt.

•

Damian with his new hairstyle: stop saying I look like Tim! He's dumb and he's a coward!

Damian: AND I'M NOT A COWARD!

•

Kori: hey babe, happy one year! <3

Dick: ??? I'm 27

(they're idiots your honour)

•

Jason, about Bruce: his hair, wack. His gear, wack. His car, wack. His footsteps, wack. The way that he talks, wack. The way that he doesn't even like to smile, wack.

Jason: me? I'm tight as fuck!

•

Duke: WAKE UP SLEEPYHEAD!!

Tim: what? What's going on!?

Bernard: what the fuck man?

Duke: 😱🤭!!

•

Jason: hey everybody, today Tim replaced me so I'm starting a Kickstarter to put him down. The benefits of killing him would be-

•

Duke: hey how y'all-

Titus: *growling and snarling*

Duke: AH! get your fuckin dog bitch!

Damian: it don't bite

Duke: YES IT DO!

•

Barbara, watching Dick and Wally through the cameras: two bros chillin in a hottub 5 feet apart coz they're not gay

•

Jason: in the League of Assassins, we got-

Damian: 👶

Jason: whose baby is you??

•

Dick: this chicken is almost as juicy as my ass

Cass: 🤨?

Bruce: 🤦

Alfred: 😐

Everyone else: 🙄

•

Tim: you wouldn't like me before my coffee

Damian: that's so weird because I fucking hate you all- Everytime.

•

Jason: HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR ME!!

Bruce: THAT'S MY OPINION!!

Dick: 👁️👄👁️

[junespriince]

Flowers floating in the dark void au

Dick, at his desk overwhelmed:

Wally, walking in: ah, found him Jay, thanks for the help.

Jason (Thanos): yeah, yeah, happy to help, just get him out of there.

Wally, smile: of course. *Shuts the door, walks over to Dick leaning on the desk* hey my love, it's spring time, ya know.

Dick, still doing paperwork, not listening: I'll get to it later, put it in the pile Jay.

Wally, sighs and grabs Dick's face: I don't like being ignored, my love.

Dick, blushing again (and he'll do it again!!): o-oh, sweetheart, I didn't know you were coming to visit, it's spring isn't it?

Wally, smiles again: yes, that's why I came down here. Now put this paperwork up and be with me instead.

Dick: I would, but I can't go on a date right now, I have to get these all sorted out and —

Wally, let's go of his face: I don't need you for a date, I need you to be my little bee and pollinate me, honey.

Dick, confused:

Dick, still confused:

Dick, got it: OH! I uh... *Throws paper work to the floor not caring and got up* of course, why didn't you lead with that.

Wally: thought I was being obvious.

Next meeting with the gods, minus Wally working hard that day

Dick, looking at the floor, very disheveled, bite marks and hickeys on show: I uh, I didn't get to finish my work.

Bruce, glaring at him, thinking some human has distracted him: I can see.

Jason, trying hard not to laugh:

Tim (Ares), looking away because he can't hide his grin:

Damian (Hermes), sighs in disappointment:

Steph (Artemis): oh we're so gonna have to meet this, wildflower, of yours.

Duke (Ouranos): damn,,, and I thought Hal (Dionysus) was bad.

Hal: rude!

Cass (psyche): well, at least you're not stressed anymore.

Kori (Aphrodite), smirking: I'll say.

Dick, blushing even harder: sh-shut up....

Iris (Demeter), glaring: so that's where he went.

Bruce, confused: you know which human did this to him?

Iris: he's not human.

Bruce: oh.

Bruce: OH! Iris, please, don't kill my son we don't have a replacement for his work, and I love my kid.

Dick, glares at Bruce: why my work at front? Why is it important, dad?

Iris, glaring at Bruce: yeah, Bruce, why ain't your love for your child not first?

Bruce, scared: I-I... I'm keeping my mouth shut.

Dick and Iris: good.

[millylotus]

Duke's cousin Jay

His full name is Jayden Jackson, he's Doug's older sister Patricia & her husband Heaven's son.

Jay's always been a competent guy, physically inclined like his maternal grandpa and just as smart as the rest of his family. But the Thomas have never been particularly well off, so Jay never really got the chance to properly expand on alot of his talents and stuck to what would get him far quick enough & cheap enough.

One of those things was the Army.

After the loss of his parents in the bombing of Bludhaven he had nowhere to go. He wasn't going to bother his Uncle & Aunt, who where raising his baby cousin and caring for Granny Luci. He needed somewhere quick and cheap. He had nowhere else to go.

Nowhere to go but the Army.

At first they where going to use him like every other boy who'd lost people to attacks like the one on Bludhaven. Trauma riddled and gunning for revenge on anyone they where directed at, but Jay just didn't want to be a bother, and being useless was being a bother.

They saw just how good Jay was and in no way where they gonna lose such a useful asset. He learned quick & adapted to everything they put him through. And all those things they put him through where important, so important that Jay was put on teams that required code names and red tape for everything.

When Doug & Elaine went missing & Duke was put in the system Jay wasn't even aware until two years later, and even then he couldn't leave because he was still "fighting the good fight".

Eventually he gets a break, a couple months and with a payout on the bounds he'd stay quite and no one would get hurt. He ran to Gotham, got an apartment and found Duke living with the Waynes.

For a second he thought maybe Duke wouldn't want to live with him, the extravagance, the comfort, it was all Jay had ever dreamed of for his family. But his little cousin jumped right into his arms and suddenly Jay has split custody with Bruce Wayne of all people.

He adjusts to civilian life about as well as he adjusts to that of a soldier, but not quite. Just enough that it doesn't register to him that Duke met him in the middle somewhere between soldier and everyday life.

He'll be back with the special ops eventually, but he has a couple months left with all the family he's got. And by god is Jayden gonna milk every second of that.

---

I generally think of Jay as an easy going if not a paranoid and really awkward guy

I've decided he has anxiety that he just isn't acknowledging right now

He's between Dick & Jason in age leaning more towards Jason

But ya know that's just how it is sometimes

He's not a very high emotions type of guy, most of the people in his family aren't

The most you'll drag out of him is an overprotective streak when it comes to Duke

He fidgets with his dog tags often

He knows how to kill a man in at least 50 different ways

He was the rookie for a solid 6 years before ending up as basically the middle child of his team

He's not sure how he feels about the Waynes but he's willing to take as much child support from them instead of indebting Duke to the army by using their money to care for him

When he finds out Duke is a meta-human he takes that shit to the grave, no-one is using his cousin

Same thing when he finds out Duke is a vigilante

He routinely cries to 16 Carriages by Beyonce

His favorite artists are Beyonce, Adele, & India Arie

He frequently goes to art exhibits and has tried his fair share at painting but is to embarrassed to really share it with anyone

Chronic resting bitch face he gets from his dad

The army aged him and people sometimes think he's Duke's dad

Knows things he shouldn't

Not tired all the time, but definitely more mellow compared to when Duke last saw him years ago, he smiled bigger back then

He's dated one person seriously in his life and that was a girl in high school

A fling there, a tent mate over here, maybe even on old friend who might come back, he doesn't really know

Once tried to eat his dad's belt as a kid

Got Duke hooked on sweets as a kid, much to Elaine's chagrin and now they're both sweettooths together

His favorite subject was art history

He reads plays a lot because they where just in abundance everywhere he went for some reason, and also because he likes dialogue a little more than heavy prose

Only has his GED, never really intended to go to college, now the army gets in the way of that

Figured out the We Are Robin thing quick, the Signal stuff not so much

Lets the WAR kids crash at his place even when he's dispatched

Doesn't like loud noises or the sound of guns

This ruined a lot of his fav trap songs for him

His fave color is yellow

He's jealous of Duke relationship with the Waynes and Robins sometimes, especially Jason, but by virtue of Duke just being a loving guy those feelings never really stick for long

One time he was babysitting Duke and the little man got him hooked on TMNT

He still has his Mikey mask, and Duke still has his Raph one

He's kind of just a guy sometimes

He's my one of my favs now

Jay Jack is just that guy, no excuses

[phantom-dc]

Dad Hood - part 12

When Jason wakes up, he is a bit confused. This isn’t his appartement? After a few moments he realizes that he is in his old room in the Manor. Why is he here? Last thing he remember is a fight with Bruce about-

‘Danny!’

Sitting up, Jason looks around him. He is about to leave his bed, when Alfred enters the room.

‘I suggest you get back into bed, master Jason. You gave us quite the scare.’

Alfred explains that Jason collapsed due to stress and Bruce brought both him and the child here.

‘Where is Danny? Is he ok?’

Jason was still worried. Who was looking after Danny while he was recovering? As soon as Jason said this, he noticed Bruce entering the room, Danny on his arm.

‘Good morning Jason. How are you feeling?’

Bruce had been very worried about Jason, so he was very glad that Jason woke up so soon.

‘Hi daddy! Are you feeling better? Grandpa Alfred said you were reeeaaaallyyy tired and had to sleep a lot! Did you sleep well?’

Danny un-clung himself from Bruce and climbed up to Jason, hugging his dad.

‘Hey kiddo. Yeah, I feel much better. How do you like the Manor? Are you getting along with everyone?’

Jason ruffled Danny’s hair. Even feeling so tired, his first instinct was making sure Danny was ok. He didn’t notice Bruce looking very proud.

‘Yeah! It’s great! It’s so big, but not green and gold and ugly! Grandpa Alfred is really nice, like Hobson! And everyone else is really nice too! Uncle Duke bought sunglasses so he could play with me, and auntie Cass let me do her hair, and uncle Damian showed me his penguin-’

‘Excuse me, young master Danny? Could you be so kind as to show me this penguin?’

Alfred took Danny away, as Jason was still very tired and needed sleep. Bruce still needed to talk with Jason after all. And besides, there was a penguin that needed to be removed.

‘Are you alright? You fainted so suddenly?’

Bruce sat down on the bed. He had been very worried seeing his son in that state. Tim had told him there were some issues with how Danny ended up with Jason that caused stress, but also told Bruce to ask Jason about it. Then Tim had opted to forgo coffee and go to bed, so he too must’ve been very stressed and tired. And Bruce wasn’t even going to mention Dick’s condition.

‘Yeah, I’ll be fine. I just had a very stressful 2 weeks. Everything just happened so fast, I barely got time to process anything.’

Jason was already feeling much better than before. Knowing his kid was safe with his family was such a relief.

‘Look, Bruce. I’m sorry for attacking you like that. It’s just-’

Bruce cuts Jason off:

‘You thought I had hidden your child from you and tried to clone him. Tim told me. I felt similair when I first found out about Damian. Just rest, Jason.’

After Bruce leaves, Jason dozes off. Before he truly falls asleep, he hears Dick yelling at Damian that Danny in not ready for sword-training. Jason smiles. Everything would be fine.

Bruce headed to the Bat-cave. As much as he wanted to spend time with his grandson, and god he had a grandson, Batman had work to do. Getting on the Bat-computer, he revisits the case that has been bugging him for days. Where had the Joker escaped too?

When Jason wakes up again, he is feeling much, much better. He really needed that rest. He gets out of bed and heads down to the main living room. There he finds almost the whole family minus Bruce, all doting on Danny.

‘And this is my dog, Titus. You may let him sniff your hand.’

Damian was introducing Titus to Danny, who was very excited. Then Danny noticed Jason.

‘Good morning daddy! Uncle Damian is letting me meet his friend! He is so cute!’

Danny was very happy, and giggled when Titus licked his hand. Duke asked Danny if he likes dogs. Danny answers him with a big grin:

‘Yeah! I have a dog too! Well, he’s not really my dog, but we play a lot! He’s really cute, until he gets angry. Then he gets really big and scary, but he is still a good boy. He’s dead!’

The room gets uncomfortable. Steph wants to ask Jason about this, but he cuts her off.

‘Don’t even ask. I have no idea what he means. Just roll with it.’

Bruce enters the room as well. He looks a bit tired, but perks up upon seeing all his family. He immediately walks over and scoops up Danny.

‘There is my new grandson! How’s the little man doing?’

When Bruce notices Jason is awake, he asks him if he is doing better. Jason waves him off, saying he is fine now that he had… 36 hours of sleep. Turns out he’d been running pretty ragged. Bruce agrees. Dick jokes that Jason didn’t even have the energy to argue with Bruce, earning him a laugh from his other siblings. Danny starts to struggle out of Bruce’s grip, wanting his dad. Bruce puts him down, but is visibly sad about it.

‘Come now, master Bruce. You spend all day with young master Danny yesterday. Let the boy see his dad.’

Alfred scolded Bruce. Bruce had spend nearly all day doting on Danny the day before, happy to have a grandson. He’d actually made his other kids a bit jealous. He only went back to work after Alfred had taken Danny and put him to bed.

‘By the way, B. How is your case going? Did you figure out where the Joker went?’

Dick was curious. Bruce still didn’t know Danny had been there, and Dick intended to keep it that way. But he had still felt weird about it. Why had Joker left without doing anything? He hoped Bruce would know something. Unfortunately, Bruce had to tell him there were no new leads. It was like the clown had gone up in smoke. Seeing that Jason was getting uncomfortable, no doubt because the clown had nearly hurt his kid, Tim decided to change the topic.

‘By the way, Jason. You were sleeping, so you don’t know yet, but tomorrow I’m having some of my friends over at the Manor. All supers, though. Kon, Bart and Cassie wanted to see the Bat-cave.’

Jason gave him a nod, but Danny got confused.

‘What do you mean? Auntie Cass is already here?’

Dick told him that more than one person could have the same name. Aunt Cass and Cassie shared their name, which is why they made sure to always call Tim’s friend ‘Cassie’, and never ‘Cass’. Danny seemed to understand, saying it was just like him and ‘Dani’ with an i! That had started a whole conversation about Danny’s clone. Jason didn’t like Duke’s joke:

‘Wait, Jason, does that make you a grandpa?’

First - Previous - Next - AO3

[insertcoolusernamehereee]

The Wayne Family is a mess

Dick:-

Parental figure is Bruce, but calls Clark ‘dad’ sometimes just piss Bruce off <3 (Ignore Gotham War, Ignore Gotham War)

Favourite sibling is he doesn’t have one :3. Okay, he likes Jason a teeny bit more, but he’s pretty fair to all of them.

He sees Damian as his son, but they both refuse to acknowledge it completely. They’re comfortable with how they are now.

He is SO older sister coded. Feels like he is responsible for everyone, and tries to hide when he’s mad/sad, but most of the time his siblings force him to tell them how he’s feeling.

Him and Cass CONSTANTLY exchange ‘I swear to god, these losers’ looks when everyone is fighting/doing something stupid.

While his favourite is Jason, and views Damian as a son, he spoils Tim and Duke HORRENDOUSLY.

Him and Steph gossip about different celebrities 24/7

Is currently dating Babs :3

Him and Selina have more ‘friendsies’ relationship, than mom-son type relationship. When one of them get into a argument with Bruce they start slandering him SO BADLY.

Jason:-

I can hear you guys from on the other side of my screen, but him and Bruce are not on Father-Son relationship stance right now. Bruce sees him as a son, but he doesn’t view him as a father (anymore). But he can talk to him without fighting now. (Ignore Gotham War, Ignore Gotham War)

Favourite siblings are Duke, Cass and Tim. Because yes. He makes it obvious too lol.

Dislikes Damian, but helps him get away with shit just to give Bruce grey hairs.

Jason ‘I hate modern technology’ Todd

Him and Dick teaming up give people HEADACHES. If Bruce/Alfred want to scold them, they MUST be separated.

Stephanie and him are besties and bully Tim mercilessly, since he luvs to steal everyone’s friends. (Damian ur next)

He gets Alfred presents on both Father’s Day and Grandfathers day, and everything in between.

Spoils Cass tbh. It’s all with Bruce’s card, but what people don’t know won’t hurt them :D

He is constantly like ‘Selina u can do SO much better’ but he does like her. Just not as strong of a relationship.

Cass:-

100% Views Bruce as a father figure. Hates David Cain, and just does not care about Lady Shiva.

Favourite sibling is Tim, and is best friends with Stephanie.

People constantly think that Damian and her are biological siblings, so when they ask, she looks them dead in the eyes and tells them ‘He’s my dad’. It gets the reporters confused every time.

Obnoxiously acts like a little Angel, but everyone knows she’s not. “Cass. We all know you crashed the Batmobile. No, you smiling will not change my mind. Yes, your smile is very pretty, BUT STILL.”

Her and Dick are forced to be the responsible ones when everyone is hanging out. With Cass in charge of Dick, and Dick in charge of Cass. It oddly works out.

Loves spoiling Damian, it’s getting concerning. In turn, Damian’s pets love her.

Stephanie spills tea about EVERYONE to her. Even about her classmates, who Cass has never even met. Fake dating Steph as well so that nobody tries to flirt with her during galas, and to explain why Steph is so close with the family.

Babs is a major role model in her life. When Cass needs advice, Babs is the first number on her phone.

She loves Selina. But sometimes doesn’t trust her. Otherwise, she approves of Batcat :) Not that strong of a mother-daughter relationship, but she buys Selina a gift for Mother’s Day, just because she can.

Tim:-

Yes, he does view Bruce as a father figure. He also still views Jack as a father figure but he’s dead now <333 As for Janet…she’s a complicated situation.

Favourite siblings are Dick and Cass. He’s besties with Stephanie, basically tells her almost everything.

Both him and Damian are petty, so they trade insults a lot, but it’s more bantering than fighting lol. They do go out to places together, but they are always acting like they are forced to, or that they would be anywhere else (even though they like hanging with each other)

He will not stop with the ‘middle child’ jokes. He will purposefully make Bruce ignore him just so he give a long monologue about being the middle child. He will then ask Bruce to give Damian up for adoption to redeem himself. Damian is still here :D

Cass is Tim’s wingman. (Which is why it took so long for TimKon/Timber to get together)

Tim gives the best Christmas gifts, followed by Damian. This is mostly because he’s a STALKER.

He likes Babs a lot, but acts like a CHILD, because she’s better at hacking than he his and therefore she stops him from doing a few things. He threw a tantrum once when she activated CHILD-LOCK on his computer.

He adores Selina. Sometimes suspicious of her, but mostly trusts her. Selina spoils him, Duke and Damian to no limits.

Stephanie:-

Bruce is NOT her parent figure, but she still views his kids as her siblings. Crystal is her mom, she does not consider Arthur her dad.

Favourite siblings are Damian and Tim, Cass and Jason are her besties.

When Jason is mad at the family and going someplace without telling them, he only tells Steph where he is going.

Once, Tim asked how they were her siblings when Bruce or Selina aren’t her parents, so she declared that Talia was her other mom, and made weird stories connecting each of them :D

Cass knows ALL of Steph secrets, because Steph keeps venting to her 24/7.

When Tim and her are together, they start collectively working on a singular brain cell, making the other person next to them having to be the responsible one. On one memorable occasion, it turned out to be Damian.

Stephanie, Dick and Tim love stalking there siblings when they get a date. Just for fun <333. Stephanie and Dick however are the quote on quote ‘embarrassing parents’ energy when it comes to dates. (Tim and Duke are pretty chill when it comes to dates, Bruce, Damian and Jason are the ones who do the shovel talk, and Cass is just staring at you menacingly during the first family dinner.)

Stephanie and Duke are the ones who sneak off to do underage drinking. Tim and Jason are the ones trying to stop them LMAO.

Stephanie likes Selina a lot. She is constantly pestering her to let her see Harley and Poison Ivy. Selina let her one time, and they caused SO MUCH chaos. (Steph is Selina’s second favourite)

Duke:-

He doesn’t see Bruce as a father figure fully yet, but he does love him. He still considers his parents (minus the weird god dad) as his parents.

Favourite siblings are Damian and Jason. Because, in Tim’s words, he’s weird like that. Him and Damian go to movies every month, and we’re especially excited for the FNAF movie. (They LOVE FNAF.)

Duke is also super younger-sibling coded. If everyone gets super defensive of Damian, then he’s the one who can say ANYTHING and get away with it. As a joke, Jason starts referring to him and Damian as twins because when people ask who they’re ‘youngest sibling’ is, everyone keeps alternating between Duke and Damian.

At first he was downright TERRIFIED of Cass. Like he was scared to be in the same room as her. Now they team up to scare everyone else. (Duke is just recording, Cass does the scaring)

Damian only does ‘puppy eyes’ VERY rarely, and it works effectively every time. Duke? He does it for Every. Little. Thing. And most of the time? He gets it. Tim and Cass are the only one who can resist it. Sometimes.

Dick is Dukes idol. He wants to be like Dick in the future :3

Jason and Duke call each other ‘narrows’ and ‘alley’ respectively. Duke also does a lot of shit, just Bruce never finds out because nobody tells on him, so Jason is JELLY of that.

Stephanie and Duke have the most similar taste in food out of everyone else. VERY, VERY sugary. Nobody listens to them when they suggest to eat something. It’s too sugary.

Selina acts like Duke is her biological son as a joke to the press. The press still thinks it’s true. It’s downright hilarious.

Damian:-

Parental figures are Bruce and Dick, though they don’t acknowledge it :) (Ignore Gotham War, Ignore Gotham War) The relationship with Talia…is messy, to say the least.

Favourite siblings are Stephanie and Duke (because obviously???) They use there gremlin nature to a MAX to prank everyone else.

He is the most younger sibling coded person ever. He’s a little gremlin-demon, but if you mess with him, you’re messing with ALL OF THEM.

Upset that Tim and Stephanie broke up, and started shipping Steph and Cass (for shit and giggles, they are the type of besties who act like there in a relationship, and Damian knows this) and constantly asks Cass when she’s proposing so that Steph can be his sister legally as well <33

Constantly bantering with Tim, but they love each other. They just have weird ways of showing it :3

Dislike-Dislike relationship with Jason, but can and will team up with each other to ruin everyone’s day. They also don’t want each other dead ig :)

Only accepts Babs as Dicks girlfriend. No in between. But he will respect Kori. Begrudgingly.

Respects Jim Gordon so much lmaooo.

Has learned the Alfred eyebrow raise. He is now tormenting everyone with it.

Selina is Bruce’s fiancé, but they have a ‘chaotic aunt, and chaotic nephew’ type of bond. Damian is 100% Selina’s fav.

————————————————————

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[ashoss]

Hii!! This is waterunderthebridge12, I just stumbled across your art of The Robin Declaration and it made my entire week <3333. I love Duke so much and I'm so glad there are others who love him too!!! I would love if you dropped your Duke-centric fic recs, I've only read a few good ones (that aren't just him being an outsider) so any recs are appreciated!

oh my god! hii! im so glad u liked the silly little doodle lol i would love to do an actual drawing for either The Robin Generation or the Robin Declaration !! they were such fun reads and i absolutely adored the way you portrayed all of them <33

unfortunately i dont really have a lot of duke-centric fics but i have a couple!

WHEN EARTH FINDS STARS. by orpheusaki

duke & jason, pre-WAR and signal

15.8k words, 4 chapters (unfinished)

"Let it be known that I completely detest the implications of what this situation is mirroring," Red Hood grumbles to himself and it's the longest string of words Duke has heard from any so-called Gotham vigilante, let alone the one who's known for shooting more than he is talking. "The fuck?" Duke mutters, because if he's already going to die, he might as well try and make sense of it. "I'm not going to care about whatever sob story you have," is what Red Hood replies with instead of explaining, "Where are your parents?" "Gone," is all Duke says, because it's really none of this guy's business. It's also the truth. Somehow, Red Hood sounds even more anguished about this information than Duke is, "Ah shit." (Duke steals the tires off Red Hood's bike and somehow gains a family.)

YOU HEAR ITS SONG FROM THE MORNING BIRDS. (series) by orpheusaki

duke & bruce, duke & batfam

9k words, 3 words (unfinished)

A series of Duke Thomas centric works, mostly featuring his growing relationship with his new kind-of-dad-boss-friend, Bruce Wayne.

Keep Your Head, Your Backbone, and Your Heart by MrMich

duke & tim, alfred, bruce

54k words, 6 chapters

The last thing that Duke expected on what was supposed to be just a regular patrol was being suddenly thrown five years into the past, coming face to face with a darker, more violent Batman than the one he knew, a broken family, and a Tim who was a foot shorter than Duke, and not even Robin yet.

A silent shadow flitted past him, just barely visible on the cave walls. He went rigid, tracking the shadow in the corner of his vision. And then he dropped to the floor, just in time, as a familiar black gloved fist passed overhead. He just barely missed being hit by the punishing blow that would have landed right on his temple for a sure concussion if he hadn’t dodged. “Batman?” Duke yelled. He somersaulted forward, just barely avoiding another strike. “B, what are you doing?!” “Who are you,” came the growled response. A shiver crawled down Duke’s spine at the grim hostility in Batman’s voice that promised violence, and something tightened in the back of his throat.

Family-- by incorrectbatfam

duke & batfam

3.3k words, 1 chapter

“Your assignment over the weekend is to write a poem about your family.”

Strange Bedfellows by snackbaskets

duke & steph & jason

2.7k words, 1 chapter

Little known fact about bats: they're AWFUL at sleeping alone. At least, the ones in the Manor seem to be, if the half-conscious kind-of-maybe siblings using Duke as a body pillow are any indication. When did he sign up for this?

Ghosts Of The Past by PlatitudinalTeen

duke & martha, thomas, duke & bruce

7.2k words, 1 chapter

Shortly after moving into Wayne manor, Duke discovers he can commune with the dead when his grandparents, Thomas and Martha Wayne begin to accidentally haunt him. ------- "No powers?" Duke repeated, even more confused as he tried to recall everything he had ever heard about Ghosts. "So, you can't possess anyone or make the lights flicker? What about telekinesis and all the other scary stuff from the books and movies?" "Those things can only be achieved by malicious spirits, dear," Martha told him. "We may be ghosts, but we aren't vengeful." They had made peace with their deaths, and even if they were still tied to the manor, it was exactly where they wanted to be. Thomas chuckled. "Yes, that's more of our son's department," he quipped, using his fingers to mimic Batman's ears. "Vengeance is a young man's game, really."

Starshine by zodarii_dae

duke & bruce, reverse robins

3.6k words, 1 chapter

Duke Thomas is a Gothamite, through and through. There’s not a lot he knows for certain, but he knows that the bagels are great, that Bruce Wayne is stupid rich, and that Batman will always protect him. That’s just how it is. So when Batman promises to bring him to his family, he believes him. Neither of them expected it to happen quite the way it did, but it all works out for the best. Or How Duke loses his parents, gains a new family, and becomes a vigilante- in that order, with some stuff in between.

necessary reminders by Quillium

duke & batfam

5.2k words, 1 chapter

Duke, as Signal becomes known and as Duke becomes part of the Wayne family.

*ao3 acc needed

hope you enjoy !!!

[wondertwinsenthusiast]

"Growing up and seeing your parents' flaws is like losing your religion. I don't believe in God anymore. I don't believe in my father either." Nicola Yoon, The Sun is Also a Star

Think about this going through Jason's mind moments before the bomb goes off. All hope is lost, his dad is not there. No one is going to save him or at least hold him while the clock is ticking. Robin's no longer magic. Robin is just him carrying on a legacy, beaten and hurting, with a mother that betrayed him by his side and a monster's laugh echoing in his head. Jasom is back now, green rage flooding his mind. He can't stop blaming Bruce. He can't stop yearning for his father's comfort and his "childhood" room.

Think about this going through Damian's mind as Bruce asks him to give up Robin and return to his mother, who Damian loves dearly but fought so hard for a chance to stay in Gotham. He grew up admiring Bruce, thought of him as the greatest man alive, only to keep missing the opportunity to be father and son and see that greatness and so much more. All that, just to die. Damian is back now. He still admires Bruce, even though he's not as tall as he thought at first and even though he was willing to give him up. He understands.

Think about this going through Dick's mind after being killed then revived by Lex Luthor, only to be sent away and eventually "abandoned". Seeing the anger and hurt Bruce caused made him cause his family. Well, Dick doesn't like thinking Bruce "made" him anything. He's all grown up now, he pulls himself up from the floor with no help, spits the blood out, wipes his chin and makes his own choices. Every fight is the same, ever since the first time he wore his family's colors and went out to the streets, with all of his mother's love and dreams as his name. Punches and harsh words, the feeling of despair after failing to comunicate. The love and hurt shared by a young parent and their eldest. So many times throughout his life Dick wished that Bruce would call and beg him or make him come home. Dick is back now. He feels as if he never died, he feels ancient. He can't bring himself to fully blame Bruce.

Steph knows she's not his child, she already has a fuck-up for a dad, thank you very much. But she is a Robin. Well, was. It's truely something, to feel your last breath leaving you and still search for approval that you did your best, even though you're the one who was wronged by another. Stephanie is back now. Sometimes it seems to her that she'll forever live with the pain of giving it all only to feel like an unwanted failure. Even though she wears her purple with pride now and it's been a long time since her days in red green and yellow. She doesn't truely blame Bruce. At least, that's what she thinks most of the time.

Bruce is just a man, not a legend larger than life. His heart bleeds for his children. He'd die for all of them, legally his or not. Dick, Jason, Cass, Tim, Steph, Damian, Duke. He makes too many mistakes to count. He tears himself apart for them each night and rebuilds himself by morning. The city needs him, her favorite child. He fears that they, the kids, won't. He fears they'll stop believing in him, in the mission, in life.

He's been blaming himself ever since that night.

[dysfunctional-family-fight]

Propaganda for the Batfamily

"Constantly fighting, and trying to kill each other. Also are fighting the mentally I’ll at 2 in the morning while wearing glorified tights and bat ears"

"*gestures vaguely at every batfam story ever* No but like they’ve got so many issues idk where to start. Jason’s death and all the shit he started post resurrection? Damian straight up trying to kill Tim for while back in the day? Bruce’s questionable and inconsistently written parenting skills? Also they’re all vigilantes which in Gotham means they definitely have issues"

"Thomas and Martha Wayne got murdered and it's all been downhill from there"

"Bruce dresses up as a bat to fight crime and Alfred, failing to stop him, adopts a "well if you're going to do it then at least do it where I can see that you'll be safe" attitude and helps from behind the scenes. Bruce in turn adopts a child called Dick. And then a child called Jason. And then a Cass and a Tim and a Duke. It doesn't really work out with a Steph but she's family anyway. Damian doesn't need adopting because he's Bruce's bio kid that he didn't know existed for ten years. And all of the children are SO determined to fight crime that the combined forces of Bruce and Alfred aren't enough to stop them, and one by one they all become vigilantes (Bruce also adopting Alfred's attitude from before). Most of them die at least once. None of them are good at coping OR communicating OR feelings OR being a member of a functioning family but by god if they aren't trying to help. Sometimes the world, sometimes each other. They usually fare better with the former. Bruce and Dick yell at each other about everything under the sun that parents and eldest children yell at each other about. Jason is angry at Bruce because the Joker is still alive after he killed Jason. Bruce is angry at Jason for killing people. Cass is away from home a lot. Tim takes even worse care of himself than the others (on page). Duke is... actually doing pretty okay if not counting the fact that his parents got jokerised and his new family is This. Damian struggles with not killing people and a rampant animal adoption addiction. They all struggle with abandonment issues. The rest of them struggle for screentime. It's like that one vine with the girl who goes "please god, let me have just one good day" and god answers "oh my god you again? give it a rest buddy" where the family (both as a collective and as individuals) is the girl and DC Comics is god."

1 all of them have tried to kill each other at least once

2 bruce wayne is a kind of shitty dad

3 everyone but bruce and alfred were child soldiers (ish)

4 dick grayson has beefed with multiple 12 year olds after he had already grown up and moved out

5 cannot overemphasize the murders and bodily harm

6 one time bruce got lost in the timestream (comics) and everyone but tim thought he was dead and tim was like “hes alive” and everyone kinda bullied the shit out of him for it

7 one time jason got murdered by a guy and then several years later dick put him in prison down the hall from the guy

8 one time bruce beat the everloving shit out of jason for shooting a guy with a blank

9 another time bruce refused to tell jason about who killed his dad despite knowing full well

10 bruce is the main reason jason died at age 15 in the first place

11 the amount of beatings dick grayson took throughout the 50s and 60s is frankly absurd

12 in the injustice universe damian got dick killed and then bruce screamed at damian for “killing his son” despite damian also being his son. then damian joined the league of super fascists against his dad (who beat him up a lot) and then his dad put him in prison

13 bruces uncle isnt in the batfamily but after bruces traumatic orphaning his uncle did more traumatic stuff to him

"Several attempted murders, several arrests of each other, general disdain and massive fights, love that is destructive to all parties, and an inability to communicate"

"they're a family full of extremely traumatized child soldiers whose primary coping mechanism is vigilante justice. many of them have tried to kill each other multiple times. some of them have died & come back wrong. they try their best and they do care about each other but they also get into big blowout fights a lot. they all came from some form of traumatized background before being taken in. the oldest sibling (Dick) had to be a father to the youngest sibling (Damian) for a not insignificant period of time when the dad (Bruce) disappeared; this was immediately after Damian (Bruce's only biological child) had started living with them after being raised in an assassin cult by his mother for the first like decade of his life. Jason died, came back wrong, was groomed by assassins, became a drug lord, & tried to kill multiple members of his family."

"i don't think i can summarise the 80 years of familial dysfunction. my best is just. Batman is the best parental figure some of these kids have ever had. Batman."

"Take your pick of issues. Dead parents, absent parents, abusive parents, addict parents, distant parents, assassin parents. How many people are in the family? Who knows? Everyone deals with personal issues by dressing up and fighting crime in the most depressing city possible. Bruce may or may not have adopted all the kids/plays favorites."

"Bruce is addicted to adopting kids. Bruce. quit putting children into crime fighting. One of them died like how did you not learn. Dick (the first robin) is a huge ass to the next one that comes along (this is the one that died like. Super graphically and horrifically) because Bruce basically fires him as his son and Dick leaves. The one that died rose from the grave, was kidnapped/manipulated for years and has supernatural anger issues (but rightfully should be angry) tries to kill brother Tim who became robin after him for replacing him. He becomes a drug lord and starts cutting off heads. Uses guns for the bit specifically (really funny) (bruce has trauma with guns from dead parents). Bruce mean to Tim when he first comes, then finds out oh shit I have a bio kid raised by assassins that really thinks he’s epic and tries to kill Tim a bunch. It’s practically tradition for his brothers to try and kill him. I love Damian but damn babe. That’s a lot king. He also genetically got the addiction to adopting but for pets. He’s pulling up with cows and shit and keeping them. Cass is perfect and we love her. Duke has a really funny relationship with Jason, and also does some out of pocket shit in the comics (by that i mean like. Dangerous/crazy stuff but in a good way) Alfred is perpetually exhausted with them, mostly bruce. Bruce is emotionally constipated so bad, like crazy bad. This man cannot communicate and is a bad dad a lot bc of it. But he’s really trying and loves them."