#ive watched this like 5 times and i cry harder every time
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QUADRILATERAL LOVE!
✦ 007 — POOKIE BEAR😍🫶🏻🫧
you walked towards the garden that is connected to the hospital, boomi clung onto your arm with his left arm while he held onto the IV pole with his right hand.
you had admitted him into an expensive hospital with a vip room, which was why there was barely any people in the garden and in the hospital in general.
you had a big smile spread across your face as you listened to your little ramble on about the hospital life. you had always looked up to him,
how he could be so optimistic even through such hard times. how he could smile so happily and never get bored of this place, "noona what have you been up to?"
you both sat at the large wooden swing bench, "hm, not much. just the usual stuff y'know?" you smiled as you ruffled his hair.
he giggled, "oh right! your performance for inkigayo was so cool, it was so fun to watch!" he stood up, "it was so amazing, you went like this and like that—"
he imitated your dance choreography stiffly, "—like it was so fast, i couldn't even keep up!" at this point the boy was getting weird looks with how loud he was being as he jumped up and down.
you watched the boy sympathetically, the red spots ran down his neck and under his hospital gown. you imagined how much faster he would've healed if you had taken him to a hospital when he was younger.
you worked as a bar's bartender ever since you were 14 to provide for you and himself, ever since your father left when you were 5, your mother became mentally unstable.
she would often zone out and would be insensitive from time to time. it was around the time she lost her job due to stress when you started working instead, trying your best to understand and sympathise with your mother.
soon after, boomi was diagnosed with leukemia after showing signs of multiple symptoms. he was bedridden and seldomly went outside, you on the other hand applied to KQ and became a trainee.
the main reason was because of your brother. you found enjoyment in rapping and dancing along the way of being a trainee, and had multiple jobs as baristas during your free time.
you were delighted when you were informed that you were gonna debut with your friends. during this time you worked extra hard to repay all the trainee debt that have piled up, while paying for your brother's hospital fees.
soon after you started receiving money did you transfer your brother to the hospital he currently resided in. the service was better and there were few people which lowered his nerves.
your heart ached every time you're reminded of his painful cries, skinny body and red spots that littered all over his body.
you never felt the need to tell anyone, until chaewon asked about any siblings you had. chaewon was somebody you trusted with your entire heart, that day you spilled everything and cried your heart out.
you two formed an even closer bond after that. you never wanted people to pity or think you were weak so you tried your best to hide any information on your background.
you teared up as you watched your now happy little brother jump around in excitement as he talked about the park just down the street.
"noona...? why are you crying..." boomi sat down and held your hand in his, you looked down to see the iv that was stuck in his veins. you cried more at that.
"i'm sorry... boomi-ah, i'm sorry i can't ever give you the life you want—" you looked up at him and cupped his cheeks as his own tears started welling up in his eyes.
"—you can't ever get you to school, make friends, you can't even get out of this place because i was too late... if only i had sent you here sooner maybe you wouldn't still be sick."
your breathe was shaky as you stroked his now tear-stained cheeks, "if only i worked harder, tried harder. if only i was better back then, as good as i am now... i hate seeing you like this, you're my everything—"
you ran your hand across the red spots that grew on his neck, so close to his jawline. the boy cried as he buried himself in your neck, hugging you tightly.
"—i would kill myself if you died, how could i live with myself if y-"
"no! do-don't say that, noona... my life is great already, i'm still alive and you're still here with me. this is all i can ever ask for!"
you look up to the sky for a minute, stroking his hair with one hand while the other held him closely, but gently. as if he was glass, fragile and could break whenever.
he was right. all you ever had was each other, he was your motivation, your inspiration, your everything. it was absolute the moment you held him in your arms after he was born, the way he looked up at you with those pretty doe eyes, it made you smile.
"sorry, love. i won't talk about it anymore, m'kay?" you held his face out and wiped the stray tears that are still rolling down his cheeks. "i'm sorry... don't cry anymore, okay? i promise i'll live a long life, with or without you."
boomi finally showed a smile at that, "okay! then i'll also try to live a long life, so i can be with you forever, noona!" you two giggled and cuddled again.
you both cuddled on the bench for a few more hours, enjoying the silence in each other's arms. that's what you had always needed to relieve your stress, everything that had built up until that moment were all forgotten the moment he was in your arms.
you woke up after a while and carried him back to his room. you tucked him in and put his 7 years old bear plush, that you got him for his birthday, in his arms.
you gave him a goodnight kiss and picked up your bag. just as you were about to leave, a small hand yanked at your sleeve, "noona... can you stay, until i fall asleep again?"
he smiled shyly as you let out a breathy laugh and pulled the chair towards his bedside, holding his hand as he got comfortable again.
you sat in silence, only stroking his har and humming soft tunes to the boy. when you heard his soft snores, you got your things, gave him one final forehead kiss and started heading back to the dorms.
<PREV𖤐NEXT>
©BRRRKDSLEK 2023
#ateez smau#seonghwa x reader#hongjoong x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#ateez x reader#ateez fanfic#ateez
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🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favourite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨
YAAAY I LOVE TELLING PEOPLE TO LISTEN TO MY MUSIC
These are my top 5 songs- listing them off awards show style
Honorable mentions to:
Rio Grande by The Oh Hellos, Send Me On My Way by Rusted Root, Bloodbuzz Ohio Live on The Current by The National, and Forest That Weeps by Wintersun.
Now for rhw nominees
5: SOS by Dethklok
Listening to this right now and realized that Dethalbum IV is the only album that features a choir and made my self cry because I then realized that the choir in SOS represented the army of the doomstar, and then cried even harder when I thought about how it was made as a thank you gift to all of us who held on to the show and the music after everything that adult swim did to it. I think about everyone I've met in the metalocalypse fandom, truly the kindest fandom I've ever been a part of, and how Brendon Small walked through fire to give us an ending and a cathartically satisfying finish to one of the greatest stories ever told. Anyway, stream Dethklok SOS on spotify.
4: When I was Done Dying by Dan Deacon
I like to listen to this one as loud as i can physically handle so I can hear every noise. (RIP neanderthals you would have loved Dan Deacon.) I highly recommend watching the music video I linked, lot of flashing lights tho jsyk.
3: Wolf Like Me by TV On The Radio
I found this song while making a playlist for my OC, Valentine Jester. The song really encapsulated everything I wanted to portray about his character and his relationship with his own transformation. It also slaps harder than hell.
2: Lost River by Murder By Death
This is one of the songs I found while making a playlist for my OC, Brother Lonely-Waters. Water is extremely sacred to his religion and he was entrusted with shepherding the waters that run through creeks, brooks, small rivers and ponds. There's just like extremely specific coincidences in both this song and the next one as well as the over all vibes that just really embodies him. (I'm putting some of my blw lore in here bc I can and I love talking about him)
1: The Ghost On The Shore by Lord Huron
This is another song that I found while making the same playlist. I've been writing short stories about Brother Lonely-Waters and theres one that I named after this song. Everything about this song fits him so perfectly. Its my favorite song of all time, I got to hear it played live at redrocks while it was pouring and the wind was crazy. Honestly a religious experience, thats how the song was meant to be experienced
Any way i love music i wish it was real
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15 questions, 15 mutuals
tagged by @woodswit 💌
whose blog ive been lurking on for a bit now and whose book is near the top of my tbr so i will hopefully get to talk about soon!
1. are you named after anyone?
first name not really (tis a common noun so kinda?), but middle name is feminized version of my mum's dad
2. when was the last time you cried?
the other day from a book i think?
out of the crying everyday phase now that we're a couple weeks out from breakup so thats a yay
3. do you have kids?
i'm pretty young so no. but, i have always wanted them (got called maternal from a very young age, we don't have to talk about what that did to my psyche)
4. what sports do you play/have played?
did very minimal karate, ballet, gymnastics as a kid and then played soccer into highschool until i was too concussed <3
5. do you use sarcasm?
actually something im trying to lean on less - i try to be a kind person and find i lean on sarcasm as a defense mechanism even when its not how i want to be interacting with people
6. what's the first thing you notice about people?
probably something cliché like eyes but also the energy they are giving off and if they have humour about them, if that makes sense? not sure how to explain it other than some people are just heavier or lighter beings
7. what’s your eye colour?
dark brown, i used to not really like them but got this insane text from a guy friend™️ once so there's that
8. scary movies or happy endings?
firmly happy endings, im an absolute p*ssy with a pension for nightmares so keep scary shit away from me
9. any talents?
I'm a good talker, always could improv a speech or articulate my point well which has come in pretty handy in academic writing
i also can solo the shit out of a canoe so
10. where were you born?
born and raised in the same canadian city
i like to leave breadcrumbs of mystery
11. what are your hobbies?
reading and talking about books generally, watch quite a few sports with varying degrees of intensity (love hockey but have had a harder time with it over the past few years with how bad the culture is), a lot of time looking at/talking about politics but thats also my degree
also not sure if it counts but i really do love being a part of fandom/internet spaces
12. do you have any pets?
a family dog back home with my parents!
13. how tall are you?
about 5'9 which i think is pretty tall and i am very self conscious about
14. favourite subject in school?
oo it shifted a lot over time. i loved math early on because i picked it up really easily but that was a really hard subject to maintain when i was in and out of school for health reasons. so it moved to the humanities/lib arts
always enjoyed english and I'm a Politics, Philosophy, and Economics(bleh) major so do with that information what you will
15. dream job?
aha thinking about the future is terrifying. i'd really like to teach in the polisci field just because i have so many thoughts about the importance of education there but every now and then i consider being a librarian
or the younger wife of a rich man who wants to give me his money for books and philanthropy would work too
absolutely zero pressure tags of those i love and/or would love to get to know better: @chai-isms @ceilidho @ohbo-ohno @heatherdewhoney @ghosts-cyphera @winterrose527 @thegoodbutter @bluemoonjeans
and anyone else who would like to but im shy and terrified of annoying people (ill bring it up to my therapist)
#tag games!#guy friends amiright#i find learning about the little people in my phone's majors or degrees so interesting#like yes slay the queens with crazy stem backgrounds who also have time to write incredible smut#i am a humble social science girly in awe of you
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tw graphic descriptions of animal death;
grief is really hard to cope with, its kind of odd because ive lost people in my life before, like my nanas when i was a lot younger, but now losing my cat it. hits harder. Daimyo was my orange baby and best friend, this past year his health had been noticeably declining VERY quickly and he had been rapidly losing weight, and i knew he was close to the end a few months back when he started clinging to me and getting upset every time i left the room.
This cat loved me, the night before his passing when we were heading to bed, he curled up on a chair where my phone was placed (as there was no room on the bed) directly next to my head, and i knew he was dying in the morning when he got upset with me holding him, and simply flopping onto the bed when i set him down. He actively turned away from the tunafish i tried to give him in my vain attempt to get him to get up. Selfishly i couldnt sit and watch, and headed over to my siblings house to do something i had already planned for that day. I later heard once i got there, from my grandfather on the phone that Daimyo had tried to get up only to flop over onto the floor.
He held out for me. waited till he could be brought to me to pass. I heard him sniffle and maybe gasp for air before he looked at everyone else around me, and me, as i saw him grunt in pain at his body shutting down. The tears i had been so desperate to hold in during this finally spillt from my eyes, and i couldnt sit and watch his lifeless body, or his burial.
The room feels empty without him, his purring (which he did near constantly since he was very young. very content kitty, not like in the pain relieving way although it may have been that way towards the end of his life) was always very loud and i could easily hear it across the room. Its gone. I keep thinking i see him everywhere, i keep expecting him to try and leave the room to go scratch his claws on the carpet outside, im expecting to hear him meow for food, or the trickle of water as he drank from his fountain. or the sound of him at his cat box. Every sign of him is gone and i have a sinus infection so i cant smell whats left. my best friend of 15 years isnt here anymore and its so hard to cope with.
As hard as i try to be a rock for the rest of my family, whos affected as much as i am, i keep finding myself crying or breaking down, especially in the small moments where im alone. I miss him and the way he used to call for me whenever i paced in the hotel hallways with the door propped open a crack (which hed watch me through)
i miss being a 4/5 year old and holding him when he was a kitten and so so tiny.
I just wished i could have done something, but his health was out of my hands, as i had little to no transportation, and a father who refused to take him to the vet. Who loaded all of the responsibility onto someone with no job, money, transport, bank account, or phone service. i did my best to find vet services, and yet he still refused to take care of daimyo. I tried my best to spoil him in these last few months
i knew these months were past the point of no return in a way, i knew he wasnt going to get better even when he did start eating again. i gave him tiny bits of cheese, plenty of treats, catnip, anything to make him happy. he used to reach up and grab the cheese out of my hands while standing on his hind legs, i could get him to do tricks.
I knew when he stopped playing with his favorite toys a few months ago it was close and i still didnt want to think about it
i just wanted him to get better.
i tried my hardest to convince my dad to do something for years so maybe just maybe daimyo could stay for a few months to years longer. i just want him back. the memories are here yes but it feels like a piece of me is missing. im 19 and 15 of the years i had on this earth were with him. what am i to do? I knew it would be hard, but i didnt think it would feel like this. I didnt think it would hurt this bad.
i dont even want to wash the clothes i have that have throwup stains or hair on them, because its some sort of piece of him i can keep as weird and gross as it is. i just dont want to let him go.
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HELLO your anon is off but I'm going to have the balls to request this publicly -- yandere!Mista imagine pls? Preferably NSFW and with kidnapping and gunplay please 👉👈 but priority for any headcanons you genuinely hold. Thank you!
MY ANON IS OFF WHAT THE FUCK
ty queen i will fix that right now!!! & YES YOU KINKY MF I LOVE YOU
🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫
Sweat was pouring down your face.
How many times would he wanna play this game? How many times is he gonna try to find you? How many times would you have to move to a town he had no idea about? And why does it never work?
Well, it was honestly a simple answer. Guido Mista plays til he wins.
Iron Maiden’s scythe cut through the bushes that led you to the back of your house, & you could hear the Sex Pistols not far from you, yelling out to Mista which ways to turn to get to you, those annoying little shits. “She’s gone through the bushes, Boss!!” Heavy footsteps quickened behind you, making you lunge with Iron Maiden for the door. Mista’s hands grabbed your ankle and your frame crashed to the manicured lawn.
“Y’know, every time you’ve managed to escape my grasp, I promised myself that I’d fuck you senseless for all of those missed opportunities,” Mista gripped your cheeks with his calloused hand, his nose centimeters away from yours and the barrel of his gun he chose to press snugly against your temple. “You KNOW you’re my soulmate, Y/N, I’m real fuckin’ tired of you running from me every time I try to love you!!”
You gave him a glare. “Why the FUCK would i want you to prove your love for me like this?! I’ve moved to 5 different towns to run from you and you still find me,” you cry out to him with panic in your voice that you just weren’t able to hide, “I DONT WANT TO BE HURT ANYMORE MIST-“
Mista backslapped you across the face, your cry of pain resonating around your little yard. “You need to shut your goddamn mouth you stupid bitch.” Mista took a bowie knife out of his boot and easily cut your clothes off, panic resting in your chest as it grows into a reaching panic attack, “in fact you need to be taught a fucking lesson, baby girl.” Venom seeped from his voice.
Mista held a knee on your chest as he worked your jeans off, and easily cutting away your black thong. “Mm, God i’ve been excited for this baby, havent you? Playing chase with me for so long, dreaming of the day i’d finally get your sweet ass in my hands, making you my perfect little baby?” Your cheeks heated at his words. You gasped as your deans were ripped off of your legs, trying everything to push Mista off of you, but every movement you made resulted in an iron grip that was sure to leave bruises on the morning. Mista’s face stayed concentrated on yours, watching your expressions as he prepped you to be utterly & wholly violated by your one true soulmate.
“No, no we shouldn’t do this out here..” he muttered to himself, was he going to stop?? “No, we’re gonna go inside and do this.” Fear gripped your heart, there’s NO way of anyone hearing you from inside, & what the fuck are you supposed to do then?
Mista picked you up and went through your basement door, quickly finding your bedroom near the back. He threw your frame onto the bed, instantly making sure his was ontop of you. His giggles of obsession filled your ears.
“It’s just you & me now baby.. oh this is gonna be so good just you wait darling,” his nimble fingers squeezed your breasts as his hot breath danced on your neck, “you’ll be begging me to take you away after this.”
Whiskey and cologne filled your nostrils as he quickly tore his sweater off. His olive toned abs scarred and hard as his body swayed back and forth, his hungry eyes raking over your pelvic region.
With a growl, his pants came off and your hips were ripped open. Your labored breathing and begs for him to stop and to please don’t fell on empty ears as he sprung out his cock. He was going to break you without mercy.
Mista lined his tip against your entrance, his body radiating pure heat and energy. “This WILL hurt darling, but just know every ounce of pain is worth as much as my love for you!” Sick twisted bastard.
You felt his rock hard dick bottom out inside you, your body unwillingly arching up and holding onto Mista’s shoulders. Mista’s eyes widened as you did this, & his face swelled with adoration for you. “Oh amore, you are just so perfect and beautiful,” he started to rail you harder and harder just to hear your screaming moans as he assaulted your g-spot, “but i want you to have all of me-ugh FUCK- don’t you want all of me amore?!”
Pleasure had you nearly drunk, “God yes Mista please, give me all of you-“ Your pleas were cut off by a cold metal tip being slammed into your cunt, Mista slammed a hand over your mouth and kept his forehead rested on yours. His giant gun being shoved into your pussy made you grind against the impact.
“Oh good girl yeah, keep riding it like that baby,” Mista praised you as you moaned for him. His hand uncovered your mouth as he gripped your face to be aligned with his. “Whos are you? Who is your soulmate?!” He started to fuck you even harder, enjoying the look of intensity on your face.
“Y-Yours Mista!! F-fuck ive always been yours!!”
Mista threw the gun to the ground and shoved himself back inside of you, your back arching as he continued his assault of you. “You better cum all over my dick because you b-FUCK you’re a good slut- i’m cumming inside you, do you understand?”
Your response was an orgasm like none you’ve ever experienced. Mista’s hot sperm lined your walls & his chest heaved into yours. He collapsed onto the bed beside you & immediately started holding you, not giving you any chance to come down off your high.
“You’re mine.” He whispered to you as your senses slowly came back to you. “And you’ll stay that way.”
Guido Mista. Your gun toting downfall.
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Bnha boys reacting to their s/o getting injured in a fight!
⚔️~SFW & Gender Neutral!Reader
⚔️~Characters: Bakugou, Midoriya, & Todoroki
⚔️~Happy reading! (There’s some cursing and mentions of blood in this one pff)
Katsuki Bakugou💥
💥~ Almost immediately after you charged toward the villain you were thrown backwards, slamming into a wall. Your body felt like it was on fire as you fell limply to the ground below, eyes fluttering closed after your head hit the ground.
💥~ As soon as he sees your body and the blood seeping through your clothes he is LIVID-
💥~ All he sees is red, this man is about to kick some major ass. He’s not holding back either, he never does.
💥~ His first priority is getting you out of there though.
💥~ “S/O!!!” He screams your name as he blasts his way over to you, taking your body in his arms and cradling you to his chest. Fuck. This wasn’t supposed to happen, he was supposed to take the bad hits for you. Shit.
💥~ He’s about to fucking kill someone.
💥~ He quickly rushes you to safety, whether it be to a medic or a relatively safe sideline. He’s about to fuck some shit UP-
💥~ SOMEONE IS GETTING THEIR ASS BLOWN TO PIECES-
💥~ As soon as he makes sure you’re not gonna bleed to death he rushes back to the fight, screaming curses at the villain as he blasts his way to them.
💥~ Hit after hit is thrown, he takes a few minor blows before completely blowing the area around him and the villain to ashes. They deserve every ounce of pain and suffering, no one DARES hurt his s/o.
💥~ Even after the villain is down Bakugou is still throwing punches. Kirishima ends up having to pull him away from the fight while encouraging him to check on you.
💥~ That’s the first thing he does. Panic floods his veins as the worst case scenario runs through his head. Fuck, what if he was wrong about your condition? Are you dead? Where the hell even was the hospital? Dammit, he can’t think straight.
💥~ He ends up limping his way to your hospital room, yelling at every doctor or nurse that comes his way, no one is going to stop him from seeing you. He doesn’t give a shit about his injuries, you always come first.
💥~ He enters your room and finds you peacefully asleep, an IV in your arm and bandages around your head and torso. You’re okay...it’s gonna be okay. Fuck.
💥~ “Dammit, I’m so sorry s/o. It’ll never happen again, I swear. I’ll protect you with my life.” He sits in the room with you, holding your hand while resting his head on the bed. He stays right next to you until you wake up.
Izuku Midoriya🥦
🥦~ You were focusing an attack on the main villain midair, your boyfriend on the ground underneath you handling the rest of the opponents.
🥦~ He always made sure to stay close to you during fights, and while he knew you could handle yourself, he just wanted to be there to protect you in case you got hurt.
🥦~ Which is exactly what happened when you unexpectedly got blasted out of the air, taking a hit to the gut before free falling with a scream.
🥦~ The second he heard you he dashed to the air, catching you firmly in a bridal hold before screeching to a halt on the ground.
🥦~ Worried eyes scan your body, focusing on the hit to your gut that was bleeding through your hero costume.
🥦~ “S/o!! Please stay awake s/o, please.”
🥦~ You struggled to stay conscious, gaze meeting his momentarily before passing out.
🥦~ “Izu..ku-“ you manage to grit out his name before falling limp in his arms. He lets out a pathetic cry of worry as he cradles you in his arms, tears threatening to fall from his eyes.
🥦~ The villain responsible for your condition taunts him from the air, and that lights a fire underneath him. He carefully places you on the ground, making sure you’re safe before propelling himself back into the air.
🥦~ “YOU BASTARD! YOU’LL PAY FOR THAT!”
🥦~ “ST. LOUIS SMAAASSHHHHHHH!!”
🥦~ He completely destroys the villain, throwing every combination of attacks he can at them. He’s not thinking straight, and he’s letting go of his limits. He pushes himself to the max, punching and kicking the absolute SHIT out of the opponent.
🥦~ Soon enough his dominant arm is broken and his legs are worn out. He lands back on the ground rather hard, stumbling on his feet to get back to you. He doesn’t even care about turning the villains in anymore, all he can think about is you.
🥦~ “S/o?! S/o please please stay with me. I got you, you’re safe. Please wake up!”
🥦~ He rushes you to a hospital as quick as he can, prioritizing your care over his. He doesn’t even allow anyone to touch his injuries before they take care of you, and even then he’s beating himself up more than ever.
🥦~ How could he let this happen? His s/o...getting injured on his watch? He feels like such a failure, not even giving the defeated villains a second thought.
🥦~ As soon as he gets the chance to he visits you, monitoring the slow rise and fall of your chest as you sleep peacefully. Your torso is covered in bandages, a little bit of dried blood staining the outside after your surgery. He feels so guilty, frowning when he lays eyes on you.
🥦~ If he had been stronger...faster even, he could’ve taken the hit for you or pushed you out of the way. He feels terrible. He promises himself to do better, to wait on you hand and foot after you wake up and train even harder after you get discharged.
Shouto Todoroki❄��🔥
❄️~ You were right next to him one second and thrown back the next with a weapon in your chest.
🔥~ Fuck. You were impaled, right next to him. Neither of you even saw it coming.
❄️~ Your body scraped the floor as a strangled scream forced its way past your lips. Your eyes clenched shut in pain. Dammit, your body felt like it was burning from the inside out.
🔥~ “S/O!” Your boyfriend races to your side as soon as it happens, eyes wide with panic and worry as he wraps his arms around you in a safe hold.
❄️~ He blocks the villain’s next attack with an ice wall from his right foot, buying some time to check on you and inspect your injury.
🔥~ “Dammit, I’m so sorry s/o, hold on.”
❄️~ He counts to three before pulling the weapon out of your chest. You let out a loud scream in response, your chest radiating in an unbearable pain. He takes his right hand and places it over the wound while pressing short and quick kisses to your forehead.
🔥~ “Agh, Sh-Shouto it h-hurts.”
❄️~ “I know, just try to stay awake s/o, I’m so sorry. I got you.”
🔥~ He manages to take decent care of your wound before propping you up against a wall on the sideline. He kisses you quickly before focusing his newfound anger back on the opponent.
❄️~ The ice wall melts and he immediately charges forward, igniting his fire side and throwing all he can at the villain in front of him. The fight doesn’t even last 5 minutes, and he manages to take down the villain by freezing them in place and melting the rest of their weapons.
🔥~ “Damn you, you’re lucky I’m not allowed to kill. Rot in hell with the rest of Tartarus.”
❄️~ He’s the most angry he’s ever been, and it takes a LOT for him to hold back from freezing the villain’s lungs inside out. Even still, as soon as it’s over he rushes back to you.
🔥~ He makes sure you’re still breathing before taking you in his arms again, carrying you to the nearest hospital. When he walks in the door he’s immediately surrounded and you’re pulled from his arms and placed on a gurney.
❄️~ “Please, please save them. They-“ He passes out mid sentence from exhaustion and quirk overuse, falling limply into the arms of a doctor.
🔥~ After he wakes up and begrudgingly sits through several check ups, he visits you in your room. He apologizes over and over again for not protecting you, and you have to reassure him that he’s strong and not the worst boyfriend ever. He helps you as much as he can and he cuddles you in your hospital bed.
❄️~ He needs to hold you and feel your heartbeat before fully calming down, and afterward he promises to never let you get hurt on his watch again.
#bnha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#mha#headcanons#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bakugou x you#todoroki x you#todoroki shouto#todoroki x reader#midoriya x you#midoriya x reader#midoriya izuku#gender netural reader
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Benimaru x reader
You and Beni are in a heated argument at the moment as you have had enough of him calling you over only to disrespect you and or use you for sex. If he wanted to be an asshole to you he could find someone else to do that to. “I’m leaving and don’t fucking call me again” you yell storming out. “Whatever ill see you soon love” he says not knowing the weight behind your words. He honestly expected you to call him a few days later for a hook up but it never came. “She’ll come back any day now” he thinks to himself but man was he wrong. Weeks turn to months and you never called or showed your face around his home. He was practically loosing his damn mind without you around. “Don’t you think maybe you should just call her and apologize?” Konro says watching him binge drink. “Why should i?” Beni replies gulping down the rest of his cup. “I cant lie Beni she had a point... how many times has she showed you she was more than a toy? At one point she practically begged you to give her a chance and you turned her down like she was nothing to you” konro says. “I told her I didn’t want to involve feelings so its her own fault” Beni slurs. “I can tell her not being around is bothering you Beni. You’ve pretty much been drinking yourself to sleep the past few months” he say patting him on the back. “When your ready to stop holding back your real feelings and actually let her in, ive heard she’s been going to the bar every Friday, the local one downtown” he says walking out Benis room. “The bar?! What the fuck is she doing there every weekend?! Is she seeing someone?” He thinks to himself before laying down and dozing off. The week flies by and before you knew it you were getting ready to go out to the bar. Doing your hair and even putting on a sexy make up look before sliding on your tight short dress with matching heels. “Well time to go drink my sorrows away” you say walking to your car. As you enter the bar the bartender greets you and asks if you want the usual Long Island. You confirm it and begin your weekend routine.4 or 5 drinks later you were pretty drunk and thought you saw Beni enter the bar and sit down at a table far from the seats. You shake it off as your imagination and a young attractive man approaches you and offers to pay for a drink. You smile and accept his offer as you too talked and had a few drinks. “Who the fuck is this prick?!” Beni exclaims from the table he sat at. “So she is seeing someone... I don’t know why that bothers me so much” he adds feeling a ping in his heart. He sees her get up and walk to the bathroom he quietly moved through the crowd following her inside.
As you lean over the counter thinking of Beni you hear the door shut and lock behind you. You look up and see Beni leaning against the door looking at you. “What do you want?” You snap at him. “Who’s that guy you were talking to?” He asks calmly ignoring your question. “Why does it matter? Its not like you care...” you say getting irritated. “How long have you been fucking him?” He asks slowly walking towards you. For some reason you find yourself excited at his appearance but you refuse to be his toy any longer. “What are you talking about?!” You exclaim “you heard me y/n now answer me. How long have you been fucking that prick?!” He says towering over your body slamming his hands on the counter behind you. “Ive never seen that man before tonight... I don’t even know his name.” You say melting a bit under his gaze. “Why haven’t you come back to me?” He asks leaning into your ear. “Because i refuse to be treated like a fucking toy Beni I don’t belong to anybody especially someone who only calls me when they want to get their nut in!” You yell pushing him but he doesn’t budge. “You know what?” He grabs the back of your head and pulls you into a rough kiss. You realized that you didn’t even push him away instead inviting him in. After a minute of your tongue dancing with his you come to your senses and pull away from the kiss. “No! I’m tired of being used” you say with. A tear falling down your face. His eyes grown wide as he wipes away your tear. “I’m sorry y/n” he says softly “for how i treated you, for how i acted like I didn’t care, for making you feel like you were worthy, for everything”. “You don’t mean that so stop” you say. “But i do... it took me till a few weeks ago to realize how much i missed having you by my side. And for me to realize that i do have feelings for you” he says kissing you tenderly. Your heart melts at his confession and without a second thought you wrap your hands around his neck kissing him back. You were relieved to hear him finally say he felt something for you. And now you can fully indulge in him without feeling used.
He picks you up and sits you on the counter behind you and he moves his mouth to your sensitive spot on your neck. He left marks all around your sweet spot on your neck as your hands trail through his hair. Normally you would have to do most of the work but he wasted no time with you. He slowly pulls off your panties and shove them in his pocket as he runs his fingers on your throbbing clit. You moan as your body quickly gives into him and his ways with you. “I missed you so much baby girl” he whispers in your ear as he increases his speed on your clit. Your legs shake as you neared a climax. You realized it had been months since you came. Your body was so sensitive that you knew you were doomed the second he started. Your moans go wild as you reach your first climax. “I didn’t even go inside her and she came. I guess she did miss me” he thinks to himself as he gets on his knees and licks up your slit a few times before sucking on your clit and sliding in a finger. “B-beni i- mmmph. I need you inside me now!” you moan gripping the edge of the sink. He smirks removing his mouth form you and unzipping his pants and boxers pulling them down allowing his dick to spring out. It looked painfully hard, much harder than ever before actually. He kisses you one more time before lining himself up with your pussy and slowly sinking inside you. Your legs shake and your body tenses up at the feeling of him stretching you out. “Fuck baby~” he moans in your ear as he bottoms out. Your heavy breathing and gripping his back with your nails turning him on even more. He pulls out a bit before slamming back inside you giving you no time to adjust to his enormous size as he fucks you deep and hard. Beni was practically falling apart inside you. You cry out in pleasure as you feel yourself close to cumming again. Feeling you clench down on him and speeds up “Look at me baby” he moans causing you to comply. Your eyes sinking into his as you feel yourself losing the tiny bit of control you had left. “I know you want to baby... so go ahead. Cum for me” he moans in your ear. Your orgasm ripped through your soul at his words. If it weren’t for the music everyone would have definitely heard you. Kisses your neck praising you through your high. Once you’ve calmed down he hooked your legs with his arms and picks you up slamming you against the wall.
He relentlessly pounds into you while admiring how well you are taking him. “You’re mine y/n” he growls at you. “A-all yours baby” you moan loudly leaning back on the wall as you melt. Your skin flushed red and sweat littering your bodies. His thrusts becoming faster and sloppy. You sink your mouth onto his neck causing him to dig into you more. You were beyond happy after telling him you belonged to him for so long and to actually be his was hitting completely different. His eyes looks at you wildly as he made sure to let you know how good your pussy felt on his dick. After “fuck baby girl~ I’m gunna cum s-soon” he moans biting your neck. You rest your head on his shoulder realizing you were going to cum again too. He was now slamming against your cervix making your body jolt with each thrust. The moment your climax hit you squeezed him so tight it caused him to cum as well. He tells your name as he slams deep inside you. Through your panting you realized he came inside. “No no no I just got him back and now he’s just going to freak out and leave again” you think to yourself. But instead he kisses you deeply as he pants. And in a low growl he says “like I said you’re MINE”. You sigh relieved as you weakly reply. “I’m yours”
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Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s Daughter (The Intense Years)
Tony Stark x daughter!reader
warnings:
a/n: y/n is 16-17, also ive really never written anything about team iron man so this was weird, someone needs to tell me i dont need every single movie detail in here
prompt: takes place from cacw and smhc
The Early Years (1) The Teenage Years (2) The Aftermath (4) Continued (5)
after the events in sokovia, you set up the relief fund for displaced sokovians and dealt with physical clean up while the avengers...
well, they had to deal with the press—and the governments of the world
getting to know your new suit AI, JOSHUA
briefly looking for bruce; no luck there
you ended up doing the MIT september foundation presentation with tony
and ending the presentation after pepper’s name popped up on the screen
“it’s probably best we get out of here”
you were his entire support system while he was going through his break with pepper
meeting charles spencer’s mother, who really gave your dad a piece of her mind
“my son died, but your daughter gets to live on. if you lost her, maybe you’d show some sympathy for murdering my child”
*awkward silence from you*
*awkward silence from tony otw to the compound*
HATING the sound of the sokovia accords, yet understanding why they’re being ratified
being torn between signing them or not and having a huge argument with the other avengers
“y/n, why dont you listen to your dad for once and sign the damn thing”
“uncle rhodey, you know why i dont want to sign. if they have us, they have access to our suits. you really think the UN should be telling us how to use them?”
“your defense doesn’t even make sense. i had the war machine or iron patriot or whatever the hell you want to call it, but the military was calling the shots”
“and look where you are now”
“right, well i wouldn’t expect a kid to understand”
“are you kidding me, rhodes? you’re gonna play the ‘im older than you’ card?”
comforting wanda while she feared being taken
and as soon as you heard about what happened in lagos
“think about it, maximoff. if you didnt do what you did, do you know how many more casualties there may have been?”
“but i killed innocents”
“no, rumlow killed innocents. you contained that blast better than anyone else could have and you prevented a whole bunch of deaths, give yourself some credit”
okay, so you weren’t the best at talking someone down while they were upset
staying in berlin with your father while the whole bucky thing began to get sorted out
but he sent you out to stay with nat while he had some “private time” with steve
tony keeping you close to him during the power outage at the base
until it turned out you brought your suit and tony did not!
everyone was looking at you to take down bucky, but it just seemed like a bad idea, you didn’t want to hurt him because you didn’t want to hurt steve
stalling to try and buy steve time to subdue his friend
“y/n, come on, for christ sake!”
“got it, dad! i know what im doing!”
“i dont think you do!”
feeling your stomach drop when bucky shot into your dad’s hand, if it wasn’t for his latest invention, he may have gotten seriously hurt
you had a slight change of heart after that, you couldn’t bare to lose your dad. not after all those close calls...
getting yelled at by secretary ross and the wonderful 36 hour ultimatum you, nat, and tony received
“i have a plan”
“don’t say the spider boy”
“fine, i wont say it”
a nice trip to queens :)
when this parker kid finally got home, tony left you to socialize with his aunt
small talk is sometimes unbearable
“so, what’s it like being tony stark’s daughter?”
“honestly? im always tired”
peter becoming a tagalong on your mission, which you didn’t really think was appropriate
“dad, i dont really think we should’ve brought the kid...”
“why? you’re about the same age as him, its not much different”
“um...no, i meant this isnt his battle. i don’t care how old he is”
face off between tony and cap where you literally just swallowed all your pride and apologized because you couldn’t handle the fact that the team was being ripped apart like this
team ups with Spider-Man
“so, uh, do you hate me or something?”
“hey, kid? we’re kind of in the middle of something, i’ll get back to you on that”
“it’s a yes or no question, y/n”
“pass”
so, things didn’t exactly go as planned...
your (former) teammates were taken to the RAFT and you couldn’t pull it together in front of them
they were pretty pissed at you
“im sorry, im so sorry, i should’ve done better”
they ignored you (up until scott lang)
“all you stark’s are the same”
“stay out of this, bugboy”
taking to the remote hydra base in another famous father/daughter teamup
“just like the old days, right kiddo?”
“i guess so”
“hey, cheer up, it’s not all that bad”
waltzing right in there to meet your friend and foe
seeing the video of your grandparents dying
*being killed
absolutely stunned by seeing such a gruesome thing
even after all you’ve seen, this really got to you
you were robbed of ever meeting them, which made you angry, but you couldn’t stay angry because there were so many things out of everyones control
realizing that this was a good time to hold tony back
“JOSHUA, lock down y/n’s suit. protocol: baby gate”
apparently your dad still had some old protocols in your suit that you hadn’t found yet
“JOSHUA? reboot! override protocol: baby gate”
“i’m sorry, miss y/n, but i cannot do that”
watching your father attempt to get revenge
and get critically injured
simultaneously working on opening the suit back up for a bad plan
finally getting the emergency release and stumbling out of your suit, rushing towards the conflict and throwing yourself in the middle of it
“please, dad. enough damage has been done.”
“y/n, get out of the way”
he saw you shaking and crying and he realized what he was doing
attacking the only family you guys really had
getting shoved out of the way so that they could end this fight once and for all
JOSHUA finally rebooting and bringing the suit over to shield you while you helplessly watched the end of this fight
when bucky and steve left, your suit disarmed and you crouched down beside your father
“come on, let’s just go home”
“im sorry”
“i know, it’s okay”
trying to comfort your dad after his defeat
you picked up cap’s shield and returned to your suit, it was time to go home
after a brief time of recovery (while you helped work on uncle rhodey’s prototype prosthetics), there was a slight change of plans for you
“okay, so for your punishment after what you pulled during my...divorce with cap, you’re going to babysit the spiderling so you gain some perspective”
“hold on, what?! what do you mean ‘perspective?’”
“i mean you dont know what it’s like to be in charge of the life of a teenager, so now you get to find out! congratulations on your promotion!”
it was not fun at all because peter kept blowing up your phone and you kept having to tell him there was nothing for him to do
Y/N: I’ll let you know when there’s a spider-level threat, kapeesh?
P. Parker: Yes, ma’am, sorry.
peter going behind your back to do some “superhero work”
and you having to swoop in to fix everything last second
“come on, you stole my thunder, y/n!”
“no, peter, i saved your life. next time you have a lead, call me first”
and then he didn’t 😌✨💕
“Y/N, incoming call from ‘big fat meanie’”
“put him through, JOSHIE...hey dad, how’s dubai?”
“taking care of a kid is harder than it looks, isn’t it?”
“don’t start with me”
damage control ahahah 🤡
“peter, why cant you just call me in? you don’t stop texting me for months but for this you go radio silent? you almost died. and you put a bunch of lives in danger! do you want me to have to go to your aunt and tell her you died?”
“im sorry! i just...i dont want to be a sidekick”
“kid, you’re gonna have a long time to make a name for yourself...but not if you’re dead!”
he started crying and you were very uncomfortable so you tried to hug him? it helped.
letting him off easy (just like your dad did to you growing up)
but apparently tony came back and took the suit anyways and you were pretty pissed about it
avengers moving day :) yes, part of your punishment was helping happy with moving day and hearing him gush about how you were “growing into such a responsible adult”
“happy i dont know if you noticed but ive basically been an adult since i was 12”
“keep telling yourself that, kiddo”
seeing an explosion and immediately knowing it was peter
“i’ll see you later, happy, love you!”
investigating the crash site and whaddaya know, there’s peter and his first bad guy, you were kind of proud
“peter, you okay?”
“nope!”
“okay, cool”
more damage control lmao (a/n: yall sick of damage control yet?)
a congratulatory call from your dad
“hey! you did pretty good, all things considered. why don’t you take the kid to the avengers compound for his special surprise?”
“aye aye, see you soon.”
“love you, kiddo”
“you too, dad”
quick fast forward to peter rejecting the position as an avenger while the press was outside, yes, you were surprised
but then your dad finally proposed to pepper, it was a pretty cool engagement announcement
“y/n, will you be my maid of honor?”
“duh!”
happily ever after (a/n: until the next part is up)
#tony stark x daughter!reader#tony stark imagine#tony stark x reader#tony stark#iron man x daughter!reader#iron man imagine#iron man x reader#iron man#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#avengers x reader#avengers imagine#avengers#peter parker#peter parker imagine#peter parker x reader#peter parker x stark!reader#spiderman#spiderman x reader#spiderman imagine
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Can u do a Tom Holland x black reader were the hollandare going to readers families house for dinner and there very excited because readers mom throws down In the kitchen and they love soul food 🥰 ending in fluff
T.H| Uncle?
Damn yo baby wild
Warnings: helping you put on jeans, mother crying for .5 seconds- sam holland being very hungry- language? Idk
A/n: I kinda just woke up. Ive been alseep all day wtf is wrong with me
“come on braydon!” you shouted at the two year old, who was currently naked running around the house, “Thomas help!” “i see you naked!” he playfully shouted at the baby trying to catch him. “NO!” braydon continued to run down the halls, you groaned as you put the toys in the bath. “BRAYDON NO!” he yelled, your eyes widened as you were confused. “WHAT DID HE DO?” you yelled, looking at the open door.
tom let out a loud groan, grabbing the baby and bringing him to the bathroom. “how did that happen?” “he runs like the flash, i swear i only blinked my eyes for a second and then BOOM here he was” you both looked at the baby, who was licking the icing off of his fingers. “just- come on” you sighed and held out your hands in a gimmie gimmie way, tom gave the naked baby to you and you started to wash him up-
after 5 minutes of fighting braydon trying to not make him eat the lotion nor grease you god him dressed, you all matching shoes. “y/n hurry up!” tom said, throwing his bed on the phone on the bed as he waited for you to put on your pants. “they literally wont come up, i need your help” you looked back at him, all of a sudden his face started to brighten up as he climbed over to you, grabbing the hem of your jeans and trying to pull them up “sheesh, you've been eating good” tom commented, struggling to pull up the pants. “fuck you, no sex for two weeks” you tried to slap his hands away but his jaw dropped looking at you through the mirror “i sincerely apologize for my actions” he said, trying to sound sweet.
“ill think about it, get off me” you waved his hands away but they never left “im gonna get these on and we are gonna act like i never said anything. agree?” he said, “uuuuuhhh” “i will pull these down y/n” “i have other jeans smarty pants” “well then i will leave you like this” he sent a look at you like he knew it all. “whatever” “mommy phone please” braydon said, he grabbed your phone from the night stand and crawled to you trying to hand it to you, you smiled and took the phone, unlocking it while tom stood and pulled up the pants, only to fail again, his fingers started to red but he was very determined to get them on “alright im gonna need you to turn around, then your gonna hold onto my shoulders- and then jump, okay?” he said, looking at you through the mirror as you only nodded and gave bray the phone.
from the top, make it drop thats a wet-
you quickly took the phone away from braydon as tom looked at you as if you were crazy, closing Instagram you put on a very wide smile handing him back the phone “lets just get these pants on” you said, finally turning around to tom and holding onto his shoulders. “one...two...three!” you jumped and he pulled them up “one more time...one..two..three!” he pulled them up higher and you looked at yourself behind letting out a ‘yay’ “you see how strong i am?” he flexed his muscles and you and you only shook your head “we got places to be thomas”
tom offered to go to Safeway for a whole new, non homemade cake which you of course disagreed, at moms house nothing was store bought other then the ingredients, and ramen.. but other than that she was all good.
“come on bray, time to see nana” tom whispered, trying to tickle his neck as bray let out little breathes, wiggling his head a little bit, but when he opened his eyes a smile found his face that made tom chuckle “yeah bray, were gonna go see her” he cooed, unbuckling the car seat and taking him out.
stepping up to the house brought back memories, but it was time to make new ones..tom walked with the diaper bag on his back and bray on his hip, his hat backwards as he bounced braydon some, watching the door open revealing “papa!” bray cheered, a big smile on his face and his eye creases that he got from his daddy, he threw his arms out trying to wiggle out of toms arms which you all laughed at, “hey pops” you said while he reached for the baby “hey princess, how are you?” he asked, opening the door more and tom held your hand, walking in.
“good, wheres mom?” “shes in the kitchen” he smiled, you seprated yourself from them both leaving bray telling them make believe stories about knights and dragons and how he gave them an uppercut, it left pops questioning if the house is safe or not but oh well.
you walked into the kitchen finding your mom cooking the greens. “oh- ive been waiting for you” she smiles, taking the ladle out of the pot and putting it on the glass painting you made. you smiled and walked closer into the kitchen, right infront of the sink. she crossed her arms over the chest and looked at your figure “how have you been baby?” she asked and you shrugged.
“im happy...like really happy, which is actually strange you know, the love i have for tom is.. indescribable actually” you smiled as her bottom lip quivered “mom dont do it, pleaseee dont” you whined looking away from her. “i cant help it!” she whispered, biting her bottom lip. “god your all grown up-” she looked away from you took, placing one of her hands on her heart.
“you wouldnt be doing this to jamie” you said glaring at her. “because hes a man, and when he was a boy he was a damn handfull” “all he did was play the game!” “exactly” she tipped her head at you and you giggled.
she opened her arms and you playfully rolled your eyes, walking over, you embraced her “you were our little princess, you asked for a prince everyday and begged for a frog” you both laughed “and i had to tell your dad every single goddamn day to hide the skirt, hide the dress, it was madness”
“and then- and then it went woooshhhh” bray said, sitting on papas lap and speaking with his hands. “very interesting, and when did this happen?” he asked, bray thought for a minute.. “like yesterday!” tom laughed at the small child's words while papa had to act like he believed it letting out an ‘ahhh i see’ and nodding his head.
it took a while for everyone to get there but everyone came, Sam continuously reminding harry that he fasted to the meal that your moms gonna cook while harry thought about it his self, his mouth watering as he drove to the house.
Jamie came over with his wife, their kids older than your own by a year so they could socialize all they please, you all took your time talking to each other, Nikki sticking with your ma and dom with pops, you and tom plus his siblings sat around and watched the kids speak, you looked over at tom who looked over giving you a childish smile which you returned putting your hand through his hair and playing with his loose curls.
“i swear she was always so thirsty” “shut up Jamie” you rolled your eyes, all sitting around the dinner table. “she would wake me up in 5 in the morning telling me its morning time and asked for orange juice” he said proving a fact as everyone around laughed, “she still does it now” tom added on making everyone laugh a bit harder “i think shes passing it on to bray” everyone looked at bray who was way to invested into the chicken bone, when he looked up he let out a “wut?” he really said `-` and took another bite.
sam finished his plate early, harry calling him fat and having a minor argument, you and Jamie wife shae talked while tom chatted with Jamie, all invested as a family, braydon played sword with Jamies son Shawn while his daughter Jannie ate the green beans, she walked over and asked for your corn bread noticing you haven't touched it.. you weren't such a corn bread fan so you gave it up to her “you look so gorges” “thank you auntie!” she said cutely, her dimples popping out as you let out an awe and looked at shae which she laughed.
it all ended in everyone watching the old movies, the ones you grew up watching. Eddie Murphy, Martin Lawrence and “uncle!” bray shouted, everyone look at him confused. Samuel l Jackson on the screen “what bray?” you asked, tom laying on top of you with bray laying on top of him, well sitting on him. “he told me- he told me he my uncle!” he turned to you and pointed at the screen, nodding his head aggressively. tom laughed “yeah i bet” he starts to remember when he took bray on set.
everyone let out tired laughs from the explanation and slowly fell asleep, tom holding your thigh as you left your hand in his hair.
#JBs sleepover#tom holland x reader#tom holland#tom holland x black!reader#tom holland fanfic#dad!tom#tom holland imagine#tom holland au
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4 5 6 for ALL OF THE CaPri FANFICS
LKSJMDHGVLKSJ ALL OF THEM???
4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue? 5: What part was hardest to write? 6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?
Ink On Paper (tongue fic) 4. lmfaoooooooo there isn't a whole lot of dialogue in this one oop-
Laurent nodded. The wax softened as he pressed his hand into it, erasing his previous message. Soft, warm, melting under his touch. He wrote again, I need someone who is not afraid to read out the insults I make towards the idiots at court. You have been fired, Damianos.
i guess it technically counts lmfao. i just wanted to show laurent post-trauma still able to make jokes and snipe at his husband so it wasnt all doom and gloom 5. i'm not sure exactly what "hardest to write" here means because like... a lot of these fic have serious gore or otherwise upsetting content, but both emotionally and actually writing wise i find that kind of thing actually pretty easy to write hahahaha. i think i got stuck with the chronology and the decision to make it non-linear made it flow a lot better. for the record writing laurent getting raped and then having his tongue cut out was actually very easy to write, i think i got it out in basically one go. #cancelme the more fucked up and intense the easier i find to nyoom through it 6. my first ever fic in the capri fandom!!!! hehehehhehehe <333333 Level Of Concern (plan B fic) 4.
Before Nicaise could say anything, Laurent spat, “Does he know you had your first heat?”
SURPRISE nic was the one who was pregnant the whole time!!!!!!! 5. this one i banged out REALLY quickly so i cant think of anything here 6. capri omegaverse!!!!!!! i wish there was more of this 🥺🥺🥺 Like Me (what if Auguste was also abused fic) 4. ******CW INCEST MENTION CW ABUSE MENTION******
“Your brother’s stuck his dick in every single member of your family,” Auguste spat out, laughing, crying, and so miserable he thought his heart would stop. His voice rose again, and he felt something burst from him as he screamed for the whole world to hear, “Did you know that? Did you, huh papa? Did he fuck you too?”
dude this line is so fucked up lmfao but i enjoyed writing it so much. actually this entire scene where auguste is having his breakdown was really intense to write and im really pleased with how it came out OR
Auguste grabbed him suddenly, looking up into his grief-stricken face desperately. “Please, Laurent,” he pleaded, voice breaking. “Please. Don’t let him end up like me.”
i felt entirely too clever with this line lmfao. i was like ~ooooohhhhh title drop~ im so dumb 5. i just remember this one like. dragged on for some time. i couldnt figure out what to do with it, how to get everything to coalesce around the final reveal about auguste 6. plot twist!!!!!!! plus auguste angst. i really enjoyed this one, i wrote it after watching the movie Spotlight which is one of my all time faves Softly, Gently 4.
“My King has been overexerting himself again, I presume?” Paschal sighed, shaking his head with a fond smile. “When have I ever done that?” Laurent cocked his head to the side, a wry smile on his face.
hehehehe sassy laurent my beloved <33333 5. honestly im just going to skip this one from now on lskjghmvlksjhglkvsjhdl i just get "stuck" sometimes without rhyme or reason and its usually on boring stuff, but then i cant remember later. the hardest part for me is when my dumb fucking adhd brain wont let me focus on writing but once i overcome that its usually pretty smooth sailing 6. horny omegaverse.................... my beloved............... giving men vaginas for horny reasons my beloved......................... Water of Life (birth fic)
“Do you want to hold him?” Erasmus breathed, eyes glassy. The baby cried, Erasmus bouncing him tenderly in those sunkissed arms. He looked apologetic. “Only for a moment, it’s not quite over yet.” A playful smile danced on Erasmus’ lips, and he brushed away a slick, damp curl from the wailing baby’s head. “A head this big, he certainly takes after Exalted.”
a cute, fun lil line in the sea of horrible angst lmfao ORRRRRR
Erasmus knelt before Damen, before Laurent. He said, “Exalted… Can you command his Highness to push?” Damen froze. “Do you mean…?” Erasmus nodded. “Alpha command.” Damen’s expression crumpled. He said, in a voice that shattered Erasmus’ heart, “I can’t. I can’t do that to him.” Erasmus licked his lips. “Exalted, in this state, he can’t push. His contractions are weaker. He’ll-” “I can’t,” Damen cried, clinging to Laurent’s limp body like a lifeline. “He’d… He’d never forgive me.”
damen is so sweet........ he loves laurent so much...... ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
He stopped at the doorframe, turning to face Laurent with tears in his eyes, and whispered, “How long does it take, your Highness?” Laurent, shocked enough to respond, hissed, “What?” “I still wake up in the middle of the night thinking of it,” Erasmus said, voice thick in his throat, tears burning at his eyes. “How long until it’s over?”
real sad hours if u up click like. i love erasmus and laurent bonding over their shared trauma <33333333333333333333 laurent and erasmus friendship propaganda 24-fucking-7 bay bee!!!!! 6. unironically this is one of my fav fic ive ever written skdljmfhgvlksjdhflmgkvjshldkjfghvmls call the midwife is one of my favorite shows and writing this made me look at birth as something visceral and possibly horrible and traumatic. i wanna write more fucked up birth scenes, SO MANY MORE. ridley scott knew what he was doing Sandalwood (erasmus/kallias my sweet boys i love u so much) 4.
“I do,” Erasmus breathes, ducking his head, flushed as though embarrassed. “In the gardens, the perfume from the orange trees all around us on those summer nights.” Kallias smiles behind him – Erasmus knows his body so intimately he can feel it in how Kallias’ posture changes, though he can’t see the soft turn of his lips. “The scent was so cloying I thought it would drive me mad. It made me want to kiss you senseless.” Erasmus laughs, breathlessly, imagining the warm heat of Kallias’ mouth against his. “Don’t blame that on the orange trees, dear one.”
beloved..................... im weeping.......... 6. these two make me fuckign CRY ON THE REG I LOVE THEM SO MUCH MY SWEET BOYS YOU DESERVE THE WORLD- Wisps of Smoke******************* (lauguste fic) 4. ***CW EXPLICIT INCEST*** (i mean....... obviously lmfao)
“Call me what I like,” Auguste growled against his ear. “You know what I like.” He did. Laurent did. He knew everything Auguste liked – the slow flick of Laurent’s tongue on the underside of his cock, that tender spot behind his earlobe, the way Laurent’s thighs looked straddled atop him like his horse – and this. “Brother,” Laurent gasped, desperate, “Brother, please, harder. Harder.”
i wanted the incest to be explicitly part of the kink here lmfaoooooo 6. hehehehehehehhehehehhehe lauguste................... i need to write more of u But I Love It (laurent is allergic to latex fic) 4.
“Laurent,” Auguste said, voice high in warning. Laurent braced himself, stiffening visibly. With what seemed to be monumental effort, Auguste continued, “You know, Laurent. I’m proud of you.”
IM A SOFT BITCH OK???????????????? auguste is PROUD of his baby bro for overcoming his sexual trauma and getting that fat dick 6. SLJHVDLMKJDHGVLK PEOPLE FUCKING LOVED THIS FIC i tried to be funny and i think it worked. plus some softe bits thrown in. i also kind of see lots of humor fic where its a no abuse au, but i wanted to write something comedic where the regent still. existed u kno????? anyways hahahahha i dont think i can write anything like this again but im glad y'all liked it Is It Cold In The Water (slice of life fic) 4.
Laurent opens his mouth to say something cheeky, but instead, what comes out is: “Do you think Aimeric had the right idea?” Damen is quiet for so long, gaze serious and framed with his long, dark lashes, that Laurent wonders if he’d spoken aloud at all – and when he’s sure he had, he realizes Damen had remembered Aimeric after all. When he speaks again, the sleep is gone from his voice. “Laurent,” Damen says carefully, as though approaching a spooked horse, “Is something wrong?”
🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 soft,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, 6. ruby likes this fic lskjdvhmflgksfjdhmvglkjsdhflkvgmjhlekjfhdvlgskjfhv im a SIMP- The Devil's Got Nothing On Me (AIMERIC FIC LEGGOOOO) 4. there are lots of lil nuggets in here!!!!
Aimeric blinks, and all he can think is, you knew? He says, "I – I just." "I am a patient man," Guion breathes, "I support everyone in my household. Everyone. But Aimeric, you are truly testing my patience. Your mother came to me in tears, begging me to find you. Look at what you did to her! There was nothing I could say until we found you!" "I'm sorry," Aimeric whispers, looking at Loyse, "I'm-" "Look at me," Guion roars.
this conversation was inspired by a very miserable encounter with my boss lmfao. fuck that guy and fuck guion
The regent, blue eyes sparkling - and Aimeric has never thought eyes could look just like a summer sky until now - says to Guion but really to Aimeric, "I was thinking I could take little Aimeric riding tomorrow. Just the two of us." Loyse says, before Guion can speak, voice trembling with relief, "I think that's a wonderful idea, your Highness."
~dramatic irony~ lmfaoooooooooo. WE know of course that this is a bad thing, but it's always fun to have characters make bad choices that they have no idea are bad. i also did this briefly in "Like Me" with auguste's ex wife taking nicaise to church because she was so overwhelmed at home and he offered to help. of course, the regent is always happy to help out. evil evil evil
"-was worried it might be difficult for him." A soft, lilting laugh. The guards had said the regent was in the library, and then there is Guion, right there with him. Aimeric is suddenly angry, not sure why his father is with the regent, who is his and no one else's. The regent responds, "I daresay it's been perfectly easy. It seems you've done most of the work already."
i wanted to highlight the fact that it was aimeric's neglect that lead him to the regent in the first place. hence "youve done most of the work already" - guion by ignoring and neglecting aimeric created the perfect environment for the regent to sweep in and take advantage. like leaving food out btwn 40-140 F is a perfect breeding ground for bacteria LOL. the books touch on that but i wanted to make it explicit
He is so, so ashamed. It's unbearable, the thought of her kind eyes, the way she cried for him, the way he pushed her away. Before he'd left to join the prince's guard, she had taken his hand, kissed it, and said in a voice fragile as glass, "It's been such a long time since I've seen you smile like that," but in that moment he could think only of the regent's letter warm in his pocket.
6. honestly i know ive sounded super conceited this whole time but i kind of tear up whenever i read through the end of the fic lmfao. aimeric is just so fucking depressing as a character and i love that i really got to explore that in this fic. he really didnt have anyone, did he????? he's like a tragic greek character where you just watch him stumbling towards his inevitable end and it hurts the whole time. its even worse on the reread ANYWAYYYYYYY thats it. thanks so much for the ask anon!!!!!!! feel free to send me more!!!
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My Cult Story Part IV: A Spirit of Sensitivity
I'm sharing my experience and trauma from when I was in a Catholic Charismatic Cult. If you haven't read Parts I-III you can find them on my page!
TW: Spiritual Abuse, Religious Trauma
I didn't like Br. David not being on campus anymore, despite the fact that we had a bizarre relationship. There were moments of kindness and mentorship that felt deep and personal, and moments that were uncomfortable because he was so much harder on me than the others. He loved Daisy and Nathan and constantly praised them for their holiness, intelligence, and openness. He didn't really praise me.
I remember one awkward time in particular during my Freshman year. We had all gone to Mass together. After receiving the Eucharist I sang with the rest of the congregation. I thought the song was beautiful and I love to sing. So, I let myself enjoy the moment.
We went to the cafeteria after Mass and were joined by some friends of ours that weren't a part of the group. In front of everyone at dinner Br. David turned to me and said, "You shouldn't sing after receiving the Eucharist. You broke the Anointing. You should know better. We are always silent after receiving the Eucharist. Always."
"Breaking the Anointing" is a phrase used to describe a moment where someone does something against the Holy Spirit's guidance and it ruins the anointing for everyone in the room (making everyone have to pray for it again).
I could feel my face turn red with shame as he asked me to silently pray A Prayer to Take Authority. I bowed my head down in front of everyone and prayed while trying to fight back tears.
.
.
My sophomore year was miserable and lonely for many reasons.
Daisy, my best friend and biggest support, left school.
My new roommate didn't like me. I know a lot of people say things like that, but she didn't like me so much that she asked the administration to move me out of our room and refused to be in the same room as me for any amount of time.
It's a ridiculous story: I was 19, almost 3000 miles away from home, my best friend was no longer at school, religion had become toxic in my life, and I was struggling because I was in love with Nathan, but he wanted to be a priest (we were friends on and off depending on how much we could handle it emotionally and it was a lot of work. The feeling of rejection in those moments when he said he couldn't handle being friends anymore was intense).
One day I was crying. I have ADHD and sometimes get emotionally dysregulated (and that time of my life was the peak of it), but there was something comforting about laying on the ground for me and I would do it on occasion when I felt like my life was out of control. I liked the cool floor against my back and the feeling of my hair being sprawled out under my head. I know it sounds strange, but it was a grounding thing for me.
(Funny story... I hadn't laid on the floor in a long time, but my toddler lays on the floor in a heap of emotion on a regular basis. The other day I decided to lay next to her.... I have to say, it is still quite nice, lol).
That day, in our dorm room, I decided to lay on the floor to help me process my feelings. My roommate, Hannah*, walked in with me like this. I know it must have looked bizarre to see a girl laying on the floor with tears streaming across her face, but her reaction was also over the top. She panicked and told me to go straight to the adoration chapel (Catholics have chapels where you can pray in front of the Eucharist). She wouldn't let me respond, she just kept telling me to leave.
"This is something demonic. I am contacting a priest," she told me as I walked out of the room in confusion.
A priest eventually showed up and talked with me for awhile, determined I was just sad and not possessed, and left. But, my roommate said she could no longer be in the same room with me. She slept somewhere else until the administration moved me.
They ended up moving me to an isolated room in the far corner of a building that didn't house many students. It was an old motel that was now being used as student housing. They usually only put older students or Grad students down there. The entire campus and the dormitories were on top of a rather large and steep hill, and this building was at the bottom.
Each room had it's own bathroom, which was nice, and I didn't have a roommate. I really loved that part. I could sing, dance, cry, lay on the floor... do whatever, and no one would think I was demonic.
But, it was also lonely.
.
I prayed for The Anointing with the group in a classroom every morning and then on Saturdays they had prayer meetings.
Steve and Joe really wanted to have a healing ministry on campus. They were enamored with evangelical faith healers. They would watch videos of Kathryn Kuhlman and Benny Hinn (we even went down to Tennessee to see Benny Hinn at one point) and act star struck. They showed everyone who would watch.
They invited as many people as possible to the Saturday night meetings because they wanted to "bless" as many people as possible. They would choose 5 or 6 people to pray over others. I asked if I could also pray with people and they refused.
"You just aren't gifted. We need people who are gifted."
I didn't want to let it go. I wanted, not a Benny Hinn style healing ministry (which made me feel uncomfortable), I wanted to love people through prayer and for them to find peace and emotional healing. So, I didn't give up. I kept asking if I could pray over others and they kept telling me no.
I called Br. David, who told me, while it seems harsh, they are right.
"You have to trust them. They are anointed for this ministry. God chose them. You just aren't gifted at this time. Just go and receive the blessings. Just receive."
I always hated how he said that. He used this odd, buttery tone every time he told me to "just receive." The same one he used to tell me how I'm "so blessed."
One day, a friend of mine was crying and she asked for prayer. It wasn't at one of the meetings, we were just hanging out together in a chapel and she saw us and asked if we would pray with her. The men pulled their holy oil out and began to prepare for their usual ritual. I quickly pulled Steve aside and asked him if I could pray with them. Not by myself, I just wanted to be there for her. She was my friend and they didn't know her well, so it made sense to me.
"You just aren't gifted. You can pray for us over there. That's where you belong" he pointed to a quiet spot across the way, far from everyone else.
I began to tear up. When will I be good enough? Why am I not good enough to pray when I've been here from the beginning? Isn't it just prayer, technically anyone should be good enough, right?
"Don't cry. Please don't. Just go pray over there."
He left and I couldn't help it, I cried.
.
.
A few hours later I got a call from Br. David who told me that he heard about what happened. I started crying again, partially out of anger and partially out of embarrassment.
"You don't pray A Prayer To Take Authority enough. You have a spirit of sensitivity attached to you. I can hear it in your voice. You need deliverance from this. I've always known you are sensitive and this is why. You won't be able to receive gifts until you are delivered from this spirit. Seek out Steve and Joe. They can deliver you. You need healing. Trust me. We are anointed for this."
(To be continued)
#ex cult#ex religious#ex christian#ex catholic#exvangelical#ex pentecostal#cult survivor#cult#religious trauma#religious trauma syndrome#spiritual abuse#emotional abuse#trauma#atheist#agnostic#deconstruction#deconversion
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wrestling asks: 1, 2, 5, 13, 14, 16, 19, 24, 26, 27, 28, 30, 37, 39 ~
1. favorite current male wrestler im trying to think who ive been flipping my shit over the most recently, but yeah i think we have to go with trent. youve heard me literally cry over him the past few days and while yeah theres a lot of names up there with him, currently i think i can name him my number one. greg just makes me very weak fucking fight me
(rest is under a read more cause man there ended up being a lot of things lol)
2. favorite current female wrestler god this one is. so much harder tbh. i love so many girls but i also dont know if ive really ever picked any faves from the current rosters. tho now that i think about it, i might just have to give it to deonna purrazzo? shes amazing and watching her recently has been an absolute treat, god what a queen
5. favorite tag team why would you do this to me. how am i supposed to choose. my brain is fighting over so many rn but i think. it has to go to breezango? theyve been so entertaining since the very beginning and i still very dearly love these bois, they are talented as hell and deserved so much better than what they were given tbh
13. the best looking diva female superstar i can answer this one again since theres a many lol (i say and immediately my brain locks up as i cant think of anyone LOL)
buuuut lets do zelina. cause she makes me gay and shes tiny and just. helluva cute. fight me. also a literal queen so hell yes we stan
14. the best looking superstar uuuUUUH. fuck do i need to pick another one LOL
lets go to the other end of the spectrum, kip sabian! hes cute, i love his hair, his smile could destroy me for days, CROP TOPS and. i dont mean to objectify but dat ass tho
16. the best gimmick i already talked about seth so lemme bounce around a bit and mention mjf
not only is he better than you (and you know it). but he takes that to such extremes its amazing and hilarious at the same time. hes so over the top it works perfectly for him, and how he keeps the kayfabe going outside the ring too is fucking fantastic. hell he literally puts his own parents on blast on social media sometimes its fucking wonderful. he absolutely owns that shit, despite not being like the top guy of the company or even having held any titles recently, but there he just goes - being better than anyone else cause fuck you thats why. its fucking amazing i tell you lol
19. the best mic worker god theres. probably like ten million people i could mention in this one lol. im just trying to think who i love listen to speak honestly, but im trying not to be biased to my. other tastes lol (looking at you jay, i love your accent but my god it gets hot in here when you get angy and that doesnt work for this one LOL)
..you know what i think i gotta give this to cm punk. thats kinda outside the box for me but its also a very obvious answer, cause this man is very good tho. the way he speaks speaks volume and the way he talks is high key just mesmerizing. you just gotta listen to every word he says whether you like it or not. and im not even talking about the legendary promos rn, but just in general. this man is a god on the mic honestly
24. which wrestler would you like to see make a return? oh my god.. well i mean. define a return tbh. if we're talking about ppl that have retired officially, im heavily leaning towards aj lee tbh cause man i miss her in the ring.
if we're talking about just someone that hasnt been in the ring for a while due to, well you know, company bullshit releases. definitely breezango. i know dango is active but i havent seen him in anything cause im too lazy to try to look for stuff, but breeze hasnt done anything and im like. pls my boi come back i miss you and your precious face and in-ring abilities :(
(..also do kip and trent count for this like they are both out with injuries and i miss them both dearly i need my dumb bois back on screen pls)
26. one unpopular opinion of yours. ..impact is the best wrestling there is on television right now. dont even fucking @ me you know im right LOL
27. who do you consider underrated? ..how much can i repeat myself if i say kip sabian? man is hella talented, absolutely unrecognized about it, and he deserves the world. also a huge ass sweetheart and im just ugh. pls return soon kip ive seen your 'underrated and over it' stuff i need you back to kick ass soon plEASE
28. what about an over-rated wrestler? how many toes am i ready to step on is the question LOL. im gonna take the easy way out on this and just say charlotte, i never really got behind her hype and while im not denying her talent or anything, i just think theres more deserving girls in the roster that could easily take her place and at least slow down her title reigns cause man. i get it live up to the dad hype cause you brother couldnt but holy shit creative calm the fuck down okay
30. you get to make your own stable. who would it consist of? what is their name? listen i think we already know im bad at names so im just completely gonna sidestep that one LOL. also im taking this question as like. who would i put in a stable together, and not as who i would be in a stable together with, so lets roll with that lol
..tho ive been sitting on this for fucking ten minutes now and my brain is completely empty. get back to me about this at some point maybe i'll eventually have an answer for you lol
37. if you were on the original nxt who would you choose as your pro? are we only including ppl in that timeframe or can i pick whoever i want? cause if its whoever, its sami zayn. he has a style i adore, i feel like that would include some really fun on-camera chemistry, and he would either just enjoy being there or make it into a very dramatic "reality tv" which would also be fucking hilarious. also its sami, its a really good chance to actually learn something really valuable even tho this isnt like. probably actually couching and shit but you know. i'd never miss that chance tho
39. what is your best wrestling related memory? can i name three? cause i think i have three lol 1. when i introduced this interest to my wife like last year. im very selfconcious when it comes to telling ppl about my interests that are kinda out there, cause ive been dealing with a lot of shit that comes with it for a loooong time tbh, but its a huge part of me and shes my best irl friend and i was like. im gonna do it she can judge me all she wants. and she got SO into it and was super excited that i shared this with her and we watched a whole lot of stuff that weekend and everything was super great. god i love her
2. my first ever live show. so wwe took like a ten year break between coming to finland, and then they decided to show up again in 2019. now me and my brother are both adults compared to the last time they were here, we were both making our own income and were like FUCK IT LETS GO. and thus we ended up in our first ever live show. i still fucking tear up thinking that oh my god i saw all these peeps live. i was one of the few people (there was like. four of us, me and my brother and some kiddos across the arena) chanting 'sami zayn sucks' which is still one of my fondest memories ngl LOL. such an emotional and amazing night, would do again in a heartbeat and i dont even watch this company anymore lol
and 3. those two nights we watched battle in the valley with @ss-trashboat (feels high key weird to tag you in this since you asked this LOL). the first night the whole karl thing happened and i fucking lost my mind, you literally heard me cry on voice. and the second night just. as a whole. seeing buddy again after months since his release, you freaking out over will, just juice, both of us losing it over jay. and being sleep deprived to hell and back on both nights cause lol timezones and just man. i love wrestling and i love you so much this whole thing honestly meant so much to me im ah <33
wrestling asks ~
#ss-trashboat#thank you for asking! <3#have i rambled enough am i now free lol#also putting this under read more cause theres. a lot. sorry not sorry woo
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𝐈𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 ⇾ 𝐍𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐚 𝐑𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐟𝐟
pairings ⇾ natasha romanoff x genderneutral reader
summary ⇾ nat gets hurt on the mission and the reader stays with her the entire time
warnings ⇾ mentions of injuries, battles, anxiety and worry
a/n ⇾ so ive just hit 700 followers 🥺!! thank you all so so much, I appreciate every single one of you and your support and I love you all! I've had this in my works for a while and I guess a sort of celebration I thought I'd share it with you all! I hope you like it 🥰🦋
*not my gif, full credit goes to the owner*
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Natasha Romanoff was brave. She did everything in her power to save everyone or anyone even if it meant sacrificing herself in the process. Her relationship with you only fueled her need to protect others, more importantly you.
Your relationship with Nat was everything you could ever wish for. She was kind, beautiful, caring and above all she made you happy and you made her happy too. It made missions slightly harder, although you agreed to not let your relationship influence your job you couldn’t help but keep an eye out for her every time you went on missions together.
This particular mission was going to be difficult, there were so many components that could go wrong and even though the entire team was assigned you couldn’t help but worry more and more that something bad was going to happen.
You were stood on the jet waiting to arrive at the target base, your foot bouncing against the floor as you picked at your fingernails, a habit you had from a long time ago. You felt a pair of hands rub over your shoulder blades reassuringly. You melted into her hands, knowing exactly who it was just by the scent you could smell.
“What’s troubling you my love?” She asks curiously.
“Nothing just have a bad feeling that’s all” You reply softly, turning to give her a convincing reassuring smile.
“Everything’s going to be fine baby, we’ve got each other’s back” She smiles placing a soft kiss to your cheek as Steve announced we were at the drop off point. You kissed her cheek softly before making your way off the jet, getting into position.
The fight was long and hard. The team underestimated the amount of Hydra agents in the base and no matter how hard you tried, they just kept coming and all you wanted to do was protect Nat. Everyone was overwhelmed, You, Nat and Steve were all on the one side trying to clear your sector before progressing to help the next.
You looked over to Nat taking down the agents around her until she was hit by a blast, throwing her against the tree, knocking her unconscious. Your heart rate sped up to an ultimate high, anger flowing through your veins as you took down all the agents around you quickly. Instantly, you ran over to him, holding back the tears as you looked at her injured state. You ripped apart your shirt, wrapping it around her leg and using it as a makeshift tourniquet to stop the bleeding in her leg.
“Nat’s down, unconscious but breathing we need to get her out of here now” You shouted into your COMS, the replies not registering in your brain as you held pressure on her other wounds.
“Everythings going to be okay baby, I’ve got you” You whisper repeatedly panicking completely at this point as Thor arrives to help evacuate her to the jet.
You continued to hold pressure on her wounds the entire jet ride back to the tower, nothing was really registering in your mind, all you could think about was keeping her alive. You followed the gurney all the way to the OR floor, only leaving her when they said you couldn’t go any further. You watched as they wheeled her into surgery, complete panic and shock flooding through your system as your head fell forward.
You looked down at your hands, her ruby red blood covering them entirely, the sight alone making you want to throw up. Your hands began to shake as the worst cases ran through your mind as your usual calm and rough exterior completely shattered at the thought of losing the love of your life. You were snapped out of your trail of thought when you felt a hand on your shoulder. You turned your head, meeting Steve’s worried eyes as you let the tears fall. He wraps his arms around you tightly, reassuring you that everything was going to be okay and no matter how much you wanted to believe him until you saw Nat you just couldn’t.
The next 5 hours felt like a lifetime, you couldn't sit still and it was probably exhausting for Steve as he watched you get up and then sit down then pace for a little while. It was the waiting you couldn't stand. You’d never stood up further than when the surgeon came out and explained Nat was okay, you thanked him continuously and practically sprinted to her room when he told you the number.
You let out a sigh of relief when you heard the monitor beep after each pump of her heart. You were instantly sat at her side pulling up the chair and intertwining your hands with hers. You didn’t know when or if she was going to wake up but you prayed every minute she would.
It had only been a few hours and you were still anxiously waiting by her bedside, telling her small little funny stories in the hope that she could hear you. You didn’t realise how tired you were until your head hit the bed beside her, your hand still in hers as you fell asleep.
A hard squeeze of your hand woke you up. Your eyes adjust slowly to be met with Nat’s beautiful grassy green eyes. You smiled widely, cheering a little when you saw her awake and okay.
“Oh my god, you're okay!” You said softly, happily getting up to place a soft kiss to her lips, not letting yourself cry again.
You sat back down, kissing the back of her hand as she wiped away the tear that accidentally fell down your cheek.
“I’m okay sweet girl, I'm here” She whispers as you let the tears fall freely.
“I’m so happy you’re okay, I love you more than anything” You whisper in reply, saying I love you for the first time.
“I love you too” She replies softly as you smile widely, moving to kiss her lips once again.
Nat had to stay in for a few more days, you stayed by her side the entire time, getting anything she needed and doing everything she wanted you too. Of course she tried to rush recovery, she just wanted to help in every way possible but she couldn’t argue with you when you told her to stop pushing herself so hard.
You had each other's backs and that's all that mattered.
Taglist: @multixfandomwriter, @cherrychris, @sw33tgirl,@averyhotchner, @aayaissaa
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This is such a cute idea! I’m addicted to making weirdly specific Spotify playlists so this is perfect. I have an ✨eclectic✨ music taste but my favorites are usually bedroom pop (mxmtoon, chloe moriondo, khai dreams, etc), romantic classical (think Debussy and Revel), and indie (although I like some Megan Thee Stallion, AC/DC, Nirvana, etc when I’m hyping myself up). As far as my personality goes, I’m pretty insightful and like to support people whenever I can, even if I don’t know them well. I can be a little chaotic sometimes, but I like to think it’s a chaotic good. I love tea, blankets, philosophy, deep conversations, the outdoors, and writing. I’m also an INFP and a Taurus :)
Sorry if that was too much, thank you so much! Take care of yourself and stay well
- Elle ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ
( @snoozless ) you don’t understand how bad i want to be your friend. 😐😐 ok so you kind of get bonus 😀 but it rly might not be bonus because akfjakdkw. so, i gave you matsukawa!! but he’s not always like revered about so if u want a character lmk!! i am. in love w him tho. you’re so sweet you would balance him out and yall would be equally chaotic together.
he would have philosophical questions w u!! he might just be a little blunt & might accidentally cut the convo short, but he would listen to everything you said.
he’s used to a wide variety of music bc i’m convinced the seijoh playlists are absolutely fucking cracked like so loud. so he really could sit there and listen to anything. and i mean ANYTHING. like if you wanted to put on christian rock he’d awkwardly try to tap his foot on beat for you.
but, that doesn’t mean he’s gonna geek over you i feel like he’d be pretty private about the relationship. he’s not like secretive but he’s not gonna post you every two seconds yknow? he wouldnt put prom photos, but if yall went to look at the stars or go on a little hike he’d take a pic and youre wearing baggy sweats and one of his shirts and your hair isnt brushed for shit and it’s way too dark to properly make your face out and he’d put that shit on his main absolutely 😒
this man would be the kind of mf to look up his “crush’s” zodiac just for shits & giggles, so if he randomly knows a taurus fact, don’t question it<3 (he looked up your compatibility and he will take that to the grave)
issei is an infp idc. so yall got that in common.
he’s genuinely so pretty.
bc i took so long, i’m going to put descriptions for all the songs i love you thanks for requesting sorry for taking forever i’ll link the playlist and list the songs<3
1. silly girl- chloe moriondo
okay while this song is actually kinda sad, i think tHIS is pretty cute. issei comes off as this intimidating guy, and the more you get to know him the more you forget ab this idea of him you had or whatever? like the lyrics “i made him perfect, cause i wanted him to be” are really prominent in the point i’m tryna make because like even tho the lyric is obviously sad bitch shit, music is up for interpretation and this is like “hello ok he actually a real mf and shiiit maybe he cool😁✊”
2. nice boys- TEMPOREX
kinda sad. i don’t care how unemotional he might act, everyone has shit that brings them down. PLUS HES A PISCES THERES NO WAY HES NOT SAD SOMETIMES. this song just really taps into insecurities for him, and the song just gets under his skin in like a very therapeutic way. also “because he’s a pisces” some of his emotions are super intense so the “because he cares too much” line hits him fuckin hard
3. IV. sweatpants- childish gambino
this is some shit he listens to more with his team, absolutely. no doubt they blare this shit during weekly practice. but, he really really likes the song. so, when you’re hanging out and he has the aux? it’s one of the first ones he puts on. you two jam to it together. he’ll come up w dumb little dances to fit with certain lyrics (stole some of them from oikawa and hanamaki, but he won’t tell you)
4. you get me so high- the neighbourhood
okay unfortunately i must say him and hanamaki get fuckin faded in empty fields at two am all trashy like. but they make it look good idc. and if you smoke, cool, if you don’t he does not care. he always associated getting high with,,, getting high and everytime he listened to this song it just was one of his getting blazed jams, but now he’s got like a different kinda “euphoric” feel with loving you? like i said this bitch is a pisces even if he doesn’t overwhelm you with affection, he thinks ab you 24/7
5. 80’s makeout session- dacelynn
thIS SONG IS SO CUTE. but it’s p self explanatory. in love and also spare a kiss pls
6. can i call you tonight- dayglow
i feel like actually coming to terms with genuine feelings for someone would be kind of weird for issei. like no offense, but he sees it as kind of a pain in the ass. i genuinely think he would be someone to put his all into work or a task in front of him. he’s super intuitive, and constantly uses it to be better. whether it’s in volleyball or like cremating ppl i guess (HE WORKS INA FUNERAL HOME POST TIME SKIP IF U DIDNT KNOW). and it’s the same in relationships, but it’s also harder because he can’t have this complete clear head because you make his brain go kinda fuzzy. so, this song is like his little way of expressing that even tho he was like ‘internally conflicted’ this mf chose to go for it and that’s how much u mean to him
7. clair de lune, L. 32- claude debussy
i’m gonna be fucking honest with you. even though he’ll listen to anything, i really don’t think this man is looking up ‘classical romance study tunes’ playlists in his free time. he definitely enjoys the music, but that’s only if someone points it out to him. and he’s listened to you talk about it before, and watched you as you heard the piano and gauged your reactions and thought u were pretty cute he’s not gonna lie😼. so he definitely just looked up classical romance and picked the first recommended song and added it on there. he’ll dance w you a lil bit, but it wouldn’t be that quiet, intimate slow dancing in the dark you think would come w this song. itd just be a little sway as he hugs you from behind while you get water, or he twirls you once randomly with a laugh UGH I LOVE HIM
8. like real people do- hozier
ok. this one was fun for me. idc. double meaning lol. so this song is literally about two dead bodies in a bog and ,,, and he works in a funeral home PLS LMAOFJAJDJA I THINK THATS SO FUCKING FUNNY AND SO DOES HE. but also this song literally is my idea of love. this is my idea of love. and yall listen to it, with your stupid little death joke, but he looks at you and he’s just like ‘oh’. yknow? YKNOW?
9. BS- still woozy
like i said, i think he puts a lot into work. and he literally plays for a powerhouse school there’s no way he doesn’t practice a lot. so that means there’s a lot of time where he’s physically not there and definitely can’t text, because he’s trying to improve. and while he wouldn’t stop volleyball for someone else, he understands that you are like super amazing for being so Cool with him not being the most available. the song just reminds him of how compassionate you are and also he does miss u when he’s at practice YKNOW?
10. i <3 u- boy pablo
this one made me so fucking soft ew. ok. this song reminds him of you so so much. he’s totally okay being vulnerable with you? and even though he has pretty heightened emotions, he’s never felt like so strongly for smth other than like ??? volleyball and caring ab his siblings (BUT HE FEELS DIFFERENT FOR U THAN HE DOES FOR A VOLLEYBALL AND HIS SIBLINGS PLEASE😁). HE LUVVVVV YOU
11. heart-shaped box- nirvana
so many reasons. for one, simply fucking JAM. yall would scream this on a drive. if you ever got drunk together, this would be the first song you play. also, little lyrics remind you of each other. (the pisces lyric in the first and third verse, and even tho the flowers aren’t being used in a sweet sense in the song he does remember talking ab flowers w u, and now any flower is mentioned and he’s like “ah yes. my girlfriend.”)
12. pluto projector- rex orange county
FUCK. FUCK THIS SONG. GOD. NO. LIKE HE REALIZES HE’S IN LOVE WITH YOU WITH THIS SONG. HE T E L L S YOU HE’S IN LOVE WITH YOU WITH THIS SONG. the first time, he just sends you the name of it like ‘pluto projector <3’ and you listen and it’s so sweet and ur like ayo turn this shit up. and he adds it to your playlist, which definitely gets a smile from you. and then one night like two weeks later youre just laying together, and he’s running his fingers through his hair and he pulls away for a second to grab his phone and he turns the song on and you just listen to it in silence and it’s so fucking intimate. and he’s just like “i don’t think i’ve ever related to a song more” and you think he’s making a joke so you tell him to shut up (also jokingly) and he just laughs and it’s dark in his room and he’s playing with your hair again and he just goes “god, if you’re telling me to shut up over that i don’t even want to imagine how you’re gonna react when i tell you i love you” and it’s right around 3:10 in the song i’m literally so gone for him. bye you cry and try to hide it but he can tell HES PERCEPTIVE
13. i wanna be yours- arctic monkeys
okay for one, it’s a good song. it’s a song he absolutely let’s play in the background, just to cover the static lol. but also? ALSO? THE TITLE APPLIES TO YOU THE FUCK? it’s as if,,, he’s whipped,,
14. supermassive black hole- muse
hanamaki prolly showed him this song, and it’s one of his vibe songs. he will do falsetto while singing it if he’s in a really good mood and it just makes everyone laugh, including himself. it actually kind of grosses him out, because this song used to literally just be a song he would aimlessly go hard to but NOW his little bitch ass is like “you set my soul alight”? i guess i relate and “oh baby, i’m a fool for you” well, surely i’m not a fool but yea i get you muse sing it. it’s so gross. at this point he wants one thing that doesn’t make him think of you, just to prove that he’s not that gone, but he struggling
15. desperado- rhianna
i’m sorry to say it but this song makes him feel like a bad bitch LMAOOOOO. like if he’s ever getting pregame jitters or anything, he will just play this song. whether it’s on the speaker or in his headphones, he puts this shit on full volume and gets a lil too cocky LOL. this is also on the main seijoh playlist no doubt. he wants to share his bad bitch song w you, so you can aLSO feel like a bad bitch?? dUH
IM SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT BABES! IF YOU WANT ANY OF THE SONGS CHANGED (or even the character) LMK!! UR AMAZING ur so sweet it makes me ill
#haikyuu#haikyuu playlists#ikigaitooru playlists#matsukawa issei#mastukawa x reader#matsukawa playlist#haikyuu x reader
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thank you for the tissues!
i hope you enjoy reading guardian and whatever else comes next.... i know u have excellent taste, how could u not, just look at your username
continuing that line of thought, if you enjoy agendas maybe you would enjoy.... making a rec list... ? 👀
(no pressure of course!)
okay it took me like a full day to get back to this but!! thank you for asking thats so sweet!! and yes i love this username so much <3 since you didnt specify ill just give a mix of things here is what is coming to mind!!
top 5 movies (of the moment)
- the handmaiden (2016) aka the best movie ever love it so much i rewatched it immediately as soon as i finished it and have watched it several times since then (it is heavy and tw for sexual assault and csa if anyone watches i think i can find a more in depth triggers guide if needed) - ladyhawke (1985) an all time fave!! a thief winds up helping two star-crossed lovers in their quest to be reunited. its animal motifs to the extreme its everything and the soundtrack absolutely slaps - the secret of roan inish (1994) one of my favorite movies as a kid. in ireland a young girl goes to live with her grandparents and finds out more about the little island where she was born. there are seals - whale rider (2002) some similarities to the above but still quite different. a young maori girl tries to claim her birthright as chief, in defiance of her very traditional grandfather. this movie is so good i had to stop to cry about it while i was writing this, it hits harder every time i watch it its so so good - suckerpunch (2011) this movie is good i dont care what anyone says its good (a big part of the film is forced institutionalization and pretty heinous medical abuse i can tell you more if you need to know) its interesting visually and thematically and the action scenes are well shot and the costumes are AMAZING
honorable mention for this sideblog is a wuxia movie called shadow (影) that i watched a year ago that was really cool!! it was fairly bloody in a squelchy way just fyi but the cinematography was gorgeous and the ending made me go !!!!!!!
i dont really have any show recs other than way i post about on here. OH i know here's my last two things
ive posted about this before but Feng Ling Yu Xiu is a wlw donghua about two young teenagers, one a thief and one a powerful martial arts master from an esteemed family. its cute!! i havent finished it but i think the whole thing has aired now. ill probably make another post with more information about it later but its on the same bilibili youtube channel as tgcf (might be members only tho) and some of it is also on wcostream(dot)com. i really like the characters and the art style and i swear only like 10 people watched it lol i would like to spread this agenda if i can
now for another webnovel!! Female General and Eldest Princess!!! again ive posted about this before but i havent finished it either im so sorry women. lin wanyue is a girl whose entire village gets killed by huns so she takes on her twin brother's identity to join to army to get her vengeance. li xian is the (you guessed it) eldest princess of the royal family trying to secure power and safety for herself and her younger brother. they meet. everything i read was really good and im planning to get back to it soon i really enjoyed it i just had a hard time keeping track of some of the characters when it got to the palace intrigue and schemes but its very good
#now that ive typed all this out im like wait i hope you meant like media in general and not fics or something#i can provide those two but fjaklfjlsd ive typed all this out youre all getting it now#too*#anyway im flattered to be asked!!#also idk if you were here when my url was still sangchengagenda but yes <3 agendas <3#hope all is well with your eyes btw!!!#ask#anon#OMG TBIS IS SO LONG ON MOBILE SORRY#didn’t realize i had so much to say oops#long post
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Ugh today. Thats how I feel right now. I am glad tomorrow is the start of spring break, even if Im working through most of it. I need a change of pace.
I slept okay I guess. I calmed down after being so upset. And I didnt have as hard of a time falling asleep but staying asleep was harder. I did let myself sleep in until after 930. And didnt get out of bed until 945. So I had a lot less time. But I got up and dressed and while my hair looked filthy, I felt cute.
I had a bagel and watched a video and was out the door with some art to show the kids. It was muggy out today. Not rainy like yesterday, but humid.
Work was alright. Only a couple kids again. I got to work on some collages with stickers with one of the kids. And later in the day I showed them the art I make and they used those sticker collages to create their own drawings. I made one too and it was just a nice project.
But before we did that I had my meeting with my manager. It went okay at first. When I had filled out my SWOT analysis thing I was really upset. It was last week when everything was bad. And she knew that, as I had warned her to take it with some salt. And she did. And a lot of things I had thought, like independent work time and schedules were confirmed. I got things clarified that I didnt know. And that helped make me feel more secure.
But then at the end of the meeting she tells me that she needs to talk about how I crossed some lines and boundaries yesterday and I was like. What?? Im like running through the whole day and I couldnt think of anything except the kids yelling? But apparently because Im an aid at this site, and not a lead teacher, I shouldnt be talking to parents? I shouldnt be checking in? I shouldnt be doing a bunch of things that have to do with the end of the day.
And I was shocked. Because I have been at this site for a month. And I have been doing a bunch of these tasks every day. Because I had been told to. It was just shocking. And I started crying. But I was embarrassed and I was like I know I am crying but this is not because of you I just cant stop. And she was taken aback and I think she tried to keep talking to make me understand but I was just like. How would I know I shouldnt be doing something I was told to do?? And it was just. Really shocking.
One of the things that bugs me is this aid thing. I dont care about being an aid, its all good. But also I dont understand why I was the lead at the other two sites but not this one? And like. I wasnt in trouble. But the way it was phrased. Crossing a line. Going outside my boundaries. Made me feel like I had done something really bad and offensive and it really hurt my heart. Because I had been trying to do the things I had been told to do from the trainings I did right before I started at this site. Talking to and checking in with parents. Leading projects. Delegating as a team with the other teachers.
But it just felt like. I was being told I was both doing to much and not doing enough. And that was really hard.
So I dont know what tomorrow will look like. And at the end of the meeting I was still very teary. I went to the upstairs bathroom that no one really uses and cried for a few more minutes. I tried to get my face to stop being so red. And headed back to class.
It was a mostly quiet day though. We did another story telling game. We did my drawing project. And made little paper crowns. It was mostly a good afternoon.
Before I left for work today I told James I hoped all the kids would leave by 4. But at 4 we went to the gym to play basketball. We were only in there for a few minutes when I realized that the other side of the gym had a family playing basketball with no masks on so I called upstairs to ask what to do. And she was like. You gotta get out of there. So even though the boys were upset, we went upstairs to the yoga studio and played catch. Me and the only girl did some ballet at the barre. It was nice.
But then all of a sudden everyone was getting picked up!A And we only had one kid left. And since we have another staff at night I got to bounce. Awesome.
I was home before 5. I put my stuff away, put a pizza in the oven, and played some animal crossing. I was supposed to have a meeting at 6 so I prepared myself for that. But then it got pushed back until 7. All good. James went for a walk and brought me french fries home. And I had a really nice meeting with Alexi about camp.
Im going to be going out there for the first 3 days of next week for a spring break camp. I have a bunch of projects to come up with for programs. Im really excited.
I still hope things are a little more normal after this summer and I can work closer with camp rather than any other job. But well just have to see. Im really excited to go out there for this little bit of time.
James made cupcakes for me to take to work tomorrow. And while they were finishing that I went and took a bath. Helped my back a little bit. And Ive just been hanging out on the couch for a bit.
Now Im going to brush my teeth and try to sleep. I got my schedule at work changed so I dont have to go in til 1 tomorrow, and noon on T/W/T, so Im pleased about that.
I hope you have a great night everyone. Sleep well. Wash your hands.
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