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skunkes · 23 days

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i dpnt want to go hoooome

#i miss drawing but thats it #talkys #at rainforest cafe we had a really nice funny upbeat server #who ended up chatting with us and saying he is 26‚ was FINALLY able to leave home from his home state (not Texas)#to be here (Texas) and he gets to be out of the closet and stuff and its like I feel this could be me too like I Get It. ive been having Fun #being away and chatting with strangers and such #i want to be away...my voice being hurt today had me dreaming about being on T again #bjut also i rly dont know its hard to see a future myself even now that my friend is continuing to help me find it ykwim #like as a kid i never looked forward to any of it. puberty high school driving college career #i thought id get over driving once i Got There but ive been driving and all i can think of is how i wasnt born to drive at all. i hate it #idk how i cld survive away from home if the driving is so difficult. the driving we did today was so stressful. i cld not have maneuvered #it at all. idk. i wanna live away but idk that its feasible and even when it seems more feasible (employment out of town) it doesnt #(the driving. the living. the sustaining self and making sure he eats the maximum 1 meal per day. the Fear. ykwim)

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gorillaxyz · 2 months

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i miss being a kid and watching sonamy pmvs amvs etc etc... and thise slideshow sonamy fics... i used to CRY SO MUCH at the ones where amy died... i loved the sonic.exe x amy videos too... and i HATED SALLY 😭😭😭 she got in the way of my otp... i fuck with her now though shes kind of like me honestly

#txt #i miss being a little kiddddddd <//////3 #and shadamy vs sonamy...... and the comic dubs #there was this one comic dub i LOVED SO FUCKING MUCH BUT IVE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO FIND IT OR THE ORIGINAL COMIC EVER AGAIN 😭#i just want ro see it one more time urgh... for the nostalgia :(

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videoworm · 17 days

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There is something about seeing actors Powdered Rich Hollywood Faces in interviews that can ruin the play pretend of shows so quickly

#first of all: rich bastards disconnected from normal reality #second of all: inflated unchecked egos #this is kind of about its always sunny bc the podcast did collateral damage to me being able to enjoy the show #also about succession although ive been dodging interviews left and right #interviews and fucking analysis videos #sorry to be a hater but i find 'ending explained' videos insulting. i imagine they have the same amount of passion like literature class ->#-> in school. where youre not allowed to enjoy a book but forced to summarize every chapter and highlight the right passages to get a good #grade #i NEVER want an ending explained. that's NO FUN. if i want to understand a show further and i care about it ill just watch it again #late night later activity #i respect the artistry housed in hollywood but damn do i not like the personalities

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littlest-bugz · 3 months

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Does anyone else go thru phases where you don’t want to talk to anyone?

Like,,, I love you so much, but I just need to RECOUP. I need my alone time so I don’t have another breakdown.

#littlest_bugz og #Like dawg Ive interacted with 2 people and even then Ive been spotty #like I just need a break #I know its not… like.. good to leave people on read or just not respond— I learned this in ‘Friendship 101’ but it gets SO tiring to mask #like no offense… i will never take the mask off. its how I fuckin survive #but I want friends #I want to love and be loved #but unfortunately :( Im not skilled at keeping friends #and Ive gotten so jaded by being a revolving door of friends that Im not even sure I can properly get emotionally attatched to anyone #on top of that ive been so in so many abusive romantic relationships that it feels impossible to find ONE GOOD PARTNER #Its not even yearning at this point because Im not sure I can form romantic connections anymore #last guy I liked by accident #like ex bestfriends ex #but he ended up being a fuckin creep #about the blowup part? I had a total explosive breakdown #over the stupidest shit too smfh #not even worth the breakdown #Broke my laptop #Hurt myself #Everything ended up okay #like even my laptop works again but #it was a lot for me- for my family #i hate being a lot like that #thankfully my brother who had similar breakdowns in the past was able to calm me down #thats why my brother is my father figure: my actual dad will yell at me while Im sobbing profusely and my brother will comfort me #and make sure im not hurt #I love my brother so much #Ive had so many people come into my life and be like ‘you love him despite all the trauma hes caused you?’#FUCKING YES #Like my brother was a survivor of fucking organized abuse. hes been through so much that it was only natural that he would blow up

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dervampireprince · 8 months

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when you read your own than/ares fic and remember how much you love ares unexpectedly being soft and insecure and he's afraid of hurting than, whereas than's just been staring at ares arms all day and can't stop thinking about getting fisted and how full he'd feel and asks ares and ares is so concerned that he's going to hurt thanatos but they prepare thanatos well and he takes ares fist and ares just watching in awe that someone trusts him this much to want and have his hands that have wrought so much inside of them. so yeah just those thoughts going around in my head while I'm sick.

[dni minors, dni blogs that have no 18+ age listed in their bio]

#you guys happy to see me posting nsft writings again only for it to be my rare pairs because im sick? welll being sick has made me able to d #do little else other than think and boy ive been having ideas akhsgdkagd #yes i re-read my own fics. why? i forget everything ive written as soon as ive finished so its like getting to read a fresh fic that i know #doesnt have any triggrs or things id find uncomfortable with it #case in point of how much i forget: i found a fic id written for myself (you can just do that you know. make stuff for yourself and not pos #it) and id not only forgotten the contents of it BUT FORGOTTEN THAT ID WRITTEN IT AT ALL #i saw krolock self insert in ym writing folder like huh no i never wrote one of those. and even after reading it im like... i still have no #memory of doing this but clearly i did alright then #thanares #nsft concept #nsft writing #thanatos x ares #the vampire writes #mlm nsft

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sonknuxadow · 8 months

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i always forget that i have this one random issue of archie sonic. you all should look at it

#i really like this cover thats the main reason i bought this i think #because i also have a physical copy of the volume that collects the first few issues with werehog sonic #and this is one of them #kinda want to find a way to display it since again the cover is the main reason i bought it #i would also kill to have a copy of idw sonic 22 but specifically the halloween alternate cover #but ive never been able to find that one anywhere. sad !#well its mostly just the cover i want so i could always just print it out and stick it to my wall

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beatcroc · 5 months

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after 200 hours in the game here are my final opinions

#i hate freezerator THANK you adn goodbye #my enjoyment of many of these levels has done massive shuffling around from first play to finding all their collectibles to p-ranks #but ive never been able to like freezerator #pizzaposting #its a shame i don't like pig city bc it's like objectively one of the funniest levels. goodjokes. but i dont like it #also oh shit is FINE it's GOOD even you guys just need to play better. i think its worth noting i had most of these p's pre-patch #pizzascare is the only one i didn't get until post-patch....im just glad ill never have to play pre-patch gnome forest again. EUGH.

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arts-i-enjoy · 7 months

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AHHHHHH

#this post brought to you by: me #i. applied for a preapproval letter for a mortgage yesterday. and spoke to a realtor to start finding me houses #i want to move several states away which further complicated things. but the houses there are CHEAP #like under 100k for a 2 bedroom move in ready #anyways i got approved for 80k with a 20k down payment. and im FREAKING THE FUCK OUT #and because i got that pre app letter i have a loan officer calling me today to talk #and we literally work at the same bank so i can SEE that hes active and hasnt read my message #even though its been 45 minutes. KEVIN MESSAGE ME BACK. IM NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO FOCUS UNTIL I DO THIS CALL #AHHHHHHH S C R E A M. it might happening!!!! i might be finally.mov8ng out in a few months!!!#i mgiht be a HOMEOWNER by the end of the year #i have been saving money for this since i was. 16? 17?#ive had a good well paying job since i was 18.#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #once i have a house then i start job searching in that area. and start getting really serious about LEAVING my very good job #which is soooo scary. this job was supposed to be my lifelong career. but then everyone fucking moved to other states and left me behind #so theres no point staying here.#i might never have this kind of job security again.#but also my realtor said that theres a lot of bank jobs in that area so maybe itll be easy to find something #on the fence on if i tell my parents that im Making Moves right now #on one hand its hard to not talk about it becuae im STRESSED TF OUT #but on the other hand when i tentatively mentioned the state i want to move to #richard started yelling and swearing el oh el #might be better to wait and avoid the tension as long as possible?#but also i dont know how they can stay angry when its literally my best option #the other places where my friends live either have 0 opportunity and high housing prices. or are even moe liberal than where im going #idk. why do half of my problems come down to “my parents will be mad” like im a 12 year old or something. shit fucking sucks #this is why i want to get out of here #also it feels weird and bad to talk to my friends about how stressed i am about buying a house when all of them are stressed about #not being able to make rent or something. my problems feel like a brag in a really odd and shitty way. but hey!#if this works out maybe ill start being stressed about how im going to make my mortgage payments! :') yay!

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weaseltotheface · 22 days

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I remember when I was a kid back in the 90's I would get these cheap little microwave cups of mac and cheese from probably walmart? With a bright orange lid and it was SO fucking good to kid me and it's almost definitely discontinued and if it's somehow still around it definitely isn't the same because I can guarantee that the reason it was so good was on account of all the trans fats

#ive never been able to find it again and it BOTHERS ME lmao

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carcarrot · 4 months

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babygirl i can obsess over vintage clothing in ways you couldnt imagine

#HATE!!!!!!!! the way depop people insanely mark up vintage items. yeah sure 200 dollars is a perfectly normal price for a pair of 70s pants #i gotta look elsewhere. there was some vintage clothing website i saw in a post once on tumblr #but i CANT remember the name and ive never been able to find it again #but it had stuff going back to like 1910s 1920s and was pretty reasonably priced i think #but rip i cannot for the life of me remember it #i gotta try like looking on ebay or somewhere else for vintage clothes #my DREAM is to have vintage clothes as my entire wardrobe. and have my house decorated with vintage kitschy things #until then...... alas

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be-good-to-bugs · 4 months

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you would think considering how much it loves sleeping that my body would, yknow, sleep when i ask it to. or even just when it has barely slept in days and im trying so hard to sleep

#the bin #uugghhhh i woke up at 1pm today bc my stupid idiot body refused to go to sleep at a reasonable time even tho i was alreday so sleep #deprived. i have to work at 6:30 tomorrow morning :/ so i guess i wont be sleeping till then bc i still have to clean stuff and shower #maybe maybe maybe ill get a nap in but idk. bleh. i hope after i get home my stupid body will sleep. its gonna have to bc i work 7 hours the #next day so i cant do that too sleep deprived. i really really hope i dont have to :( hhhh #i wanted so bad to get high last night mosty bc my body has been refusing to sleep this past week but my sister n her boyfriend didnt come #over so i wasnt able to get more edibles :( or boxes for packing. hhh. i need to move so soon! i have no idea what day its even gonna be yet #i badeky have an idea of how much its gonna cost either. they finally gave me a gas cost estimate afeyr ive been asking for 3 weeks #hhh. well. whatever. i only have 4 more shifts. im kinda sad tbh. i really like working here. my coworkers are so nice #tomorrow is probs the last time ill ever see my fav coworker. shes so nice. shes so nice she used he/him for me and calls me orb #i just mentioned the name in passing once after i changed my pronouns on my nametag and she noticed and she remember!#and before she used it for me she stopped and asked if i was comfortable with it or if i wanted to keep it private. i have never EVER met #another cis person who would even think to ask that. most cis people dont understand why you would care. shes like. the nicest person ive #ever ever met. why did i have to find such a great place to work in minnesota? well. even if i am super tired tomorrow morning itll probably #be ok. butbi really would prefer not to be.#i dont know why i havent been able to sleep properly. bleh. i do liek what edibles do to me its a fun time but its kinda annoying that i #cant use them very casually for sleep or pain. they incapacitate me for 14 hours minimum.#well. at least no matter how stressed i am abt everything. i will definitely be elsewhere in 18 days max. should be less than that.#i will miss this job and these coworkers but i am relived that i wont have to go to work for awhile. esp with this tooth pain.#and im so excited to be able to draw again! im glad im moving a month before artfight bc itll give me time to get shit prepped #i wanted so bad to participate last year but i wasnt able to come evn close to finishing any attacks bc i was too tired from working

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kideternity · 5 months

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Okay sorry if this is an insane request. But does anyone have any actual sources for if the cosplayer who served as the inspiration for Betsumon ever consented to her likeliness being used for the creation process. I found one blogpost which CLAIMS she was fine with it but there was no source for it attached I saw and I cant seem to find anything on my own just by looking it up

#digimon #betsumon #tailmon betsu #dinu yells into the void #dinu yells in the void #please. help me out with this one chat.#i know this is an insane request because most people dont like betsumon because they think the design is creepy or weird #i actually dont mind betsumon as a digimon purely from a design standpoint my hang up is that like #i feel Bad. over the idea of liking betsumon as a digimon because of the origin and because i have no idea if the cosplayer consented #in my opinion its way more important to me to know if the cosplayer agreed to having a joke digimon created based off her #its an entirely different situation if betsumon was created essentially as a mockery of a cosplayer who was just doing her job #and having fun #especially because in the original betsumon design it could be read as extremely transmisogynistic as well #sorry again i know literally no one else on planet earth cares about this BUT I DO!!!!!!!#ive never been able to personally reconcile like. Enjoying designs that are meant to be meanspirited mockeries #of whatever thing person etc. like it makes Me specifically feel bad #and again I think it’s more important to examine the origins of a design like this and Why it is the way it is. then just blanket #‘oh well its ugly to me so its bad and evil and gross’. do i make sense does any of this make sense.#fuckkkkkk i should go get dinner this just kept me up all night thinking about it #like obviously if the cosplayer was fine with it and she was like finding it funny or charming then my hang up is gone #because like Shes the main person affected in all of this. hence why i wanna know. you know?

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artemisbarnowl · 11 months

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Having a totally normal one* after waking from a dream where I just relive life with my ex. It was so normal and fine and we did things such as lay around in bed and make plans for the day, go to the Korean supermarket on the corner, go to a friend's house together.