#ive been going to bed at like 2 for a week and ive been like. huh im not really feeling any effects im still waking up at 7 or 8 thats great
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
US Tumblr user growth rate is estimated to slow down to 4.1%.
Note
me Omw to annoy you about more Francesca content 馃樇馃樇
you and my entire inbox my friend strap in everyone this is gonna be The Francesca Mega Collection. part one The Bed Collection ft You HAVE To Click/Tap To Read Anything ESPECIALLY The Asks
thank you for joining me for the Francesca Bed Collection im going to pass out
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#francesca the cat#snap sketches#OK HI HERE been tryin to posts this for ten asks now cause i severely underestimate the speed of my inbox once it picks up#ironically my sis dropped her cat off for the weekend so. i have much fran inspo LMAO she loves doing the bed thing i confess..#i will be candid and say right now that like. two(? maybe just one) of the asks in this post arent fran related#theyve been sitting in my inbox for weeks but they were used for inspo in this post SO IT COUNTS IM POSTING IT TO FEEL LESS GUILTY OK !!!!!#these arent meant to be a cohesive story or w/e but i mean if you try it can prob be. at least the last two#i was gonna try to knock out all my fran asks today actually but 1.) i underestimated how slow i draw#2.) i got to the thirdv (i made it first in this list but i mean he cutie in the third too..) comic and my brain decided i drew erik too ho#and ive decided to dedicate the rest of my night praying for forgiveness for my lascivious thinkings <- they will continue#but yeah like i said i have all the comics and the sort sketched out buuut i might redo one of them#its kinda nsft flavored (but still cute + sfw) and thats not usually a prob but the asks themselves are wholesome i felt awkward jerLJLK#maybe ill repurpose the beginning panels ... or hell maybe ill just finish them and post them as is#spoilers its more Superhero Roeplay bullshit so it can def be posted on its own without fran.. idk ...#we know how my brain goes Thats Why We're In This Sitch once im given an inch i run a marathon and i dont stop#i be having such intense visions im gonna throw up. anyway wtf was i saying i forget. oh well thaat means EnjoYWAIT I REMEMBER#im tempted to close my inbox for a bit just until i clear out all the asks i wanna draw and ik i dont HAVE to draw them#but as ive said i get visions so easily ...... and i must see them realized ... but then id miss talking to everyone :(#so we ball is simply the answer. ok fr enjoy now LMAO BYYYYEE im gonna go redraw some old stuff i think to wind down#maybe ill touch one more asks cause . cause like Many Of Them its got stuff ive been wantin to draw all week ... heh ...#ok bye we'll see what happens im not checking over these if theres a mistake then by god theres a mistake BYE
356 notes
路
View notes
Text
procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally
#on my friends living room floor they love together but one of them has been london for weeks or maybe months#to be with her love. im on a foam mattress from one of their beds next to a glass bottle of water opened by one of them#in a mug given to me by another. the weather felt like my childhood today and it also felt like 2 years ago.#(put space in the heavens Einstein's idea and hes your friend too so nothing to fear) around the table they drank and laughed and i thought#i hope you keep growing so full with the love you receive . i hope your appetite becomes insatiable from how used to it you are#and i know youre all leaving soon but i hope one day you miss this and that youll be happy you miss it#its worth missing i think#i thought he didnt care but he said after exams hes going walk around this area over and over#(this is near where he lived and where we visited almost daily for a year)#(hed come across the bridge on a lake)#we went where she used to live and at the entrance a fox sat calmly. it just yawned and stared.#it felt important somehow. i think maybe their impressions of me will never be close to how i feel inside but i think#i love them enough for that not to matter. i dont think theyll ever know this. i dont think if they did it would change much.#and seeing them smile makes my heart glow anyway. today i tried their malaysian tea the ginger burned my throat#they warmed my heart. hes going to canada soon and hes going to the US soon and shes going everywhere soon ill never understand#how were supposed to live with memories and with seperation and with the past but we do it anyway so i think it doesnt matter much#i wanted to write a poem for the lab rats with the fibre optic wires lit with blue forcing them to turn around and around#something about how im sorry that the two photon arrays burned the inside of your brain. im sorry about the sharp points of multielectrode#arrayes. im sorry about everything we do to you. she asked to see me tomorrow. im trying to have self control but i miss her so awfully#last night my friend talked to me and i updated on everything that happened with love and the lack of it and she just started laughing#and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets#and she felt like the people were her. and her eyes would go over the people and the bag of bagels and the construction men they probably#have a kid at home maybe shes a daughter. this kid is crying for her mother and the building you just walked past caused#blisters and pain and people died in it and very likely people were born in it. we talked for hours and i felt like#i was holding her hand just like that time she held mine watching a horror film. i love her so much#my friend is a genius and i remember her picking up the charms of my phone and staring at the leaf hanging from them. shes side stepping to#music drinking dangerous cider and cocktails from a movie and chit chatting with billionaires and undergrads#i love her dearly. his head covered in electrodes. she tells me about a syrian guy shes in love with and she says#what you feel and what i feel is like cocaine. ive tried a lot of fucking cocaine.#she says ive reminded her of what living actually feels like and to never put energy into someone who doesnt see me this way.
30 notes
路
View notes
Note
how do u draw so much so fast
well,
#the short answer is autism and ritalin. btw#the long answer is: i wake up anywhere between 730-0900. i draw. if i have work when i come back i go and i draw.#i go to bed anywhere between 0100 and 0230. i wake up the next day and i draw.#i dont draw fast and in fact i get distracted and/or procrastinate quite often#i just have 16 hour days! every day! i am awake for 16 hours! sometimes more depending on the general mood! [cursed emoji here]#and like! wtf do you even do at that point?? how do you fill a 16 hour day? an 110 hour week? an almost 6000 hr year?#i draw! i have been drawing *seriously* since grade 2! and i have *seriously* loved the persona series since like mid/late 2017!#for those of you keeping score at home; i am 19! 2017 was grade 7 for me! ive loved this series for almost a full third of my life!#[continued emotional rant cut for length] but this is my community and my arts been the way i interact with this community since#(looks at my blog archive) 2019 when i posted my first persona art! please dont look at any of that now tho lmao!#so i guess. if the long answer needs to be short too then the long answer is love!!!! its always been love!!!! AND ALSO STILL RITALIN!!!!!!#asks & requests#personal
64 notes
路
View notes
Text
sleep doesnt exist but i animated a fish even more so life is okay
#my older brother complained that it was too choppy and i needed to make it 24 fps#i nearly killed him#guys my sleep is so fucked#like i go to bed at 8 pm and then sleep terribly only to wake up at 5:45 am#i genuinely cannot fall asleep at 8 ive been trying to for like 2 weeks now#but every morning i have to wake up before six so i dont miss the bus#i have no free time anymore#i have an assignment due on saturday night#but im booked all day tomorrow and all night tonight#im literally so tired all of the time#three pigeons in a trench coat
7 notes
路
View notes
Text
i am very grateful that im not someone that has to deal with daily seizures but it is evil when it takes like a week and a half's worth of business days to recover from a seizure
#if i had them everyday or every other day i would be so fucked 馃槶#id like to say they dont bother me per se but the entire week after is laying in bed after 11 pm and wondering if jts going to happen again#bc my head feels like its about to explode#and then do not get me started on the fear of getting in the shower within the first few days of one happening .#reasonably i understand that my seizures happen from 11pm to maybe 3 am on average .#but ill have a seizure and then have to hype myself up for like 2 hours just to take one 3 days later st like 2 pm#my seizures do not interfere with my day to day life in extreme ways but existing knowing that i have them during a certain time frame is#like. Hey man can you grow up#also it is really funny being told theyre probably hormonal or stress related and should 'probably stop' as i get into my mid 20s .#Well im turning 25 next month and evidently i still have seizure activity in me#also also heres a fun fact: my epilepsy does not have an actual named diagnosis they just said i certainly have a Form of it 鉂わ笍#they dont know what causes them and i have no real warning signs (bc a headache =/= potential seizure)#they dont bother me but i do have to live with the knowledge that i could have one any day now and wake up to my mom asking me questions#hope everyone can tell i have a lot of feelings about my epilepsy despite not talking about it like ever 鉂わ笍#the only thing that really bothers me is the no warning signs. ive been perfectly fine and had them. ive had massive migraines when i was#unmedicated and didnt have one. very bizarre#and ofc all my brain scans come back normal all the time so they dgaf Lol
8 notes
路
View notes
Text
.
#been sitting here for 1.5 hours now trying to decide if i should go see my friend as promised#or not. basically i texted earlier like heyy sorry can we do tomorrow im all over the place (mentally extra unstable*) i don't wanna#make you deal with that#but she said she might not be able to do tomorrow and she's told me she hates when ppl cancel bc so many ppl have been#cancelling on her and yk. feels bad. so i really should go but im also just. ???#idk what it was but today is just so not it ive been crying a bunch and barely working and i v much needed#my noise cancelling headphones on the train and then i just kept them on for 1#and then i just kept them on when i got home and ive just been on my bed scrolling and trying to decide dhsjsjdjd#yes i was supposed to work 8 hours today 馃拃馃拃馃拃#so that's the other part like if i go see my friend i know tomorrow will probably be rougher and i also need to work then yk#ugh anyways i should go we can just chill im sure#* headphone context for myself bc im just like 馃え馃え am i just kinda sad and tired today or do i really need to rest#anyways. Thoughts? dhsjjdjdjd#other context is that my friend rly isn't doing good at all and i haven't seen her in a week and it's been#even longer since we could talk 1 on 1#like 2 weeks rip#maybe i just need food tbh ive mostly had sugary stuff today rip
8 notes
路
View notes
Text
good morning
#txt#gm gm gm gm gm#wanna buy a hot choclate and draw christmas beatles illustration#storybook illustration career here i come 馃檱馃徎#anyways i went to bed at like#jesus when did i go to bed i dint even know. 1 am?#whatever i woke up st 4 am but ive been doing this 3 hour sleep every 8 hours for weeks now#this means nothing 2 me
2 notes
路
View notes
Text
Bruh people aren't fucking lying about COVID fatigue goddamn
#covid#life of sponty#ive been sick since i got back home on 12th#infected probably 1 to 3 days before that#so im coming up on 2 weeks of covid#and right now the worst symptom remaining is the fatigue and exhaustion#i got up and showered and sat at my desk for 30mins and now I'm so exhausted i have to go back to bed#it's effort to stroke the cat#the other day i did a small physical exertion and afterwards was so intensely tired it tooo about 6 hours of recovery#just to be able to lift small objects without dropping them#shits fucked bruh#also I'm getting the classic taste fuckery and bitter and alkaline flavours are literally making me choke#it's wild#desperately hoping it doesn't last because i really dont want to lose onions forever#i love onions#i was scared for a second that I'd lost mango too but it turns out it's just the mango skin flavour. the flesh is fine#cough was only monstrous for like a day#rest of the time it's not been any worse than ive had from normal nasty coughs. pretty manageable#the fatigue is wack though#I've never been this weak before#it's kind of fascinating from an authorial perspective#this is going to be useful experience for the writing banks
37 notes
路
View notes
Text
okay i need to find something to crochet or knit or sth cause i really cant spend one more day just sitting in my bed doing nothing
#i used to hear people talk about how having to be quarantined the 2 weeks was so hard and i didnt get it#bc 1. i love being in my home and bed and 2. during the duration of all the lockdowns i went out once just around the block bc it snowed#and in retrospect it heavily impacted my mental health but at that time i was perfectly fine with it#and then at uni when i didnt have lectures id hardly ever leave the house and id be mostly fine with it#but theres something about being locked in my room bc of covid that is making it feel terrible#and like ive been watching shows and i read like 200 pages of a book yesterday#so it's not like my life has changed#but i just want to go do thiiiings. ive been in bed nealry all the time since friday night#also i now hate speaking with people apparently? like mom will come ask me if i want any food or my sister will text me to ask me how i am#and i just get so agitated. i don't know why. but yeah tumblr is the closest thing to communication i can deal with#okay gonna go find some scrap yarn project to start while i finish my heartstopper rewatch#jo says stuff#personal ramblings
3 notes
路
View notes
Text
depression cancelled i cleaned up a small part of my room and also my bag
#logbook#i hsd tea bags in my bag without a baggie bc im an idiot and was walking around with spilled tea in said bag for a month#i have spent all weekend in a depressive haze im so tired and sick. and this week is going to SUCK ass.#its fine everythings fine.#im debating if i want to go do laundry tonite or not. in the process i could pick up some food and things for the house up here.#and then not have to go down tmrw. . .sighs#also my plans to hang out wirh new friend were cancelled. he said he didnt make enough and had to work and was like 'oh yeah#we can hang out for an hour' and im like bro wont you need to get ready for work. like dw abt our hang out take care of yourself#and then we bonded over taking care of ourselves LOL#i think it worked out bc i ended up tsking 2 hrs to build a maybe hr max furniture and then napped for another 2 hours#i was so sick snd exhausted. this whole weekend has been like what if you are never not depressed. thanks man!#i forget how depressed i get at the end of summer going into fall everybodys so up there and im just waaaay down here#but i have managed to do some things. finally pulled myself out to bed. and ive also forced myself to eat so theres thst too.#jk also in case it wasn't obvious. depression still here
3 notes
路
View notes
Text
i swear to whatshername you could stop heating this house in november and it would still be warm enough by xmas. outdoor temp peaked like 3 days ago but my room is still at 28掳C 馃懝
#I WANT TO GO TO BED ugh#no wonder ive been sleeping like shit#i mean my room is cooling down#but only by like#1-2 degrees per day lmao#so 鈥媔 get to enjoy a week long echo of every heatwave#its 19掳C outside!!!!!!!!! what the fuck!!!!!!#its bc this is the sunniest corner of the house#the windows open onto a stone patio#i.e. a giant heat reservoir#south facing ofc#perfect for a summer lover like moi#&
6 notes
路
View notes
Text
#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/#but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment#i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating#there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2#months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it#not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him#in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to.#until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if#he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone#and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think#there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy#your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you)#and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly#so last night#i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text.#i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart#until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent#that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real#did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart#and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about#and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in#which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever#it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in.#just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the#reason that he went away on me.#im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying#not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me#that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest.#and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs#he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am
4 notes
路
View notes
Text
hey guys
#vent#just... gimmie a sec im gonna put it in the tags i cant find the readmore on my phone rn#im havin a straight up not good time but not the worst in the house!#the worst is my cat. whose old and dying. and i have no money to put to sleep to fuckin put us both outta this misery#typical. she cant get a heart attack and go fast like my moms dog#shes gotta wail and be ill for a month while im recovering from one surgery and trying to get ready for the next#its also an amazing time for my ocd that i learned i have from artists on hear explaining what it is to send me into spirals#over germs. but shes just 20 with teeth and respiratory issues her whole life and been struggling with constipation#so i KNOW how shes dying. shes backed up and hungry and dehydrated but feeling bloated still and not eating or drinking.#shes probably got arthritis and has been moving like a geriatric for a while but its to the point now she wont even lay down. shes just#perched on a pile of towels in the bathroom dozing and occasionally crying for me to come pet her. im so fuckin tired#and theres nothing i can do! the vet i could find a timeslot for in a reasonable time said 500$. so thats cool. im paying 1000$ for me in#a week for my stuff and its just. god all she and i are doing is crying and it sucks ass#she wants company for comfort and i dont blame her - so the fuck do i!#but i cant sit in the bathroom with her my damn legs keep going numb. and my roomate 1) cant emotionally buoy me thru this#and 2) has a long work day tomorrow and its already mad late. sigh#dont try to offer me condolences ive worked thru her dying already its just now we're botb exhausted in the form its taking#if anything i just need another distraction to keep me from spiraling over something again#edit: ARUGH AND THE OTHER CAT THROWING UP IN THE OTHER ROOM. GOD DAMN IT#the younger one has so many allergies and wont stop fucking eating things off the floor babygirl i am BEDRIDDEN you gotta stop eating shit#off the floor!!!!!!!! you have specialty food for a reason!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#awesome it was right in my bed
2 notes
路
View notes
Text
ive been either working and going to school at the same time or doing the other when im not doing one for so long i'm going to start my first summer vacation in five years after tomorrow! yay!
#i could do 3 weeks but im doing just 2 and then one a bit later this year#i mean. i tehnically did have one vacation last year. but it was me being on sick leave so i dont think that counts#bc i was literally recovering from a surgery#also tbh. i am in need of a break. ive been not sleeping properly for like a month or two so i need to catch up#and fix my sleep schedule#and i do crave having nothing to do#i am going to do nothing but rot in bed and play video games#and also go to a con and see friends but i swear i will do nothing for at least half of my vacation#my performance at work has honestly been pretty poor for a bit now bc i need a break but now i get it so im fine#leevi talks
3 notes
路
View notes
Text
that vibe youre on when its summer holidays and youre unmedicated and hyperfocused on something and going to bed at 2am every night and time is bending away and reality starts getting kind of wavy actually still fucks. this energy stands the test of time all my mutuals should do this
#ive been going to bed at like 2 for a week and ive been like. huh im not really feeling any effects im still waking up at 7 or 8 thats great#i must have really improved my sleep quality! awesome!#and today im like. oh. ogh. feelin it 馃憤#i need to quarantine . my phone#hm on second thought. its a bit scary that i spent the majority of my teenage years feeling like this#like oh i was. so fucking checked out........hm....maybe that was bad for my development or whatever idk#anyway. im having a great time with it now to the absolute detriment of all the healthy routines i was making prior to this ^.^
3 notes
路
View notes
Text
grrrughrgurh i keep seeing puss in boots stuff n i have to stop myself from going innsane i wanna watch it sooooooo bad
#i love puss in boots so much whahhhbaisikajc#watched the first puss in boots today even though i said id do it like.聽 2 weeks ago LMAO#im ngl fuck that egg#its been awhile since ive actually been excited to watch a movie#OH SHIT WAIT WHENS THE SPIDERVERSE COMING OUT I FORGOT ABT THAT#OH ITS THIS YEAR... that was a movie im also very VERY excited to see#like. i didnt care abt spiderman that much but then i saw spiderverse and my whole life has changed i love it so much#i should def rewatch spiderverse#not right now tho.. its almost 12 and i need to sleep#its been hot all day and now its raining abit and its making everything humid i just wanna go to bed#goodnight !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
22 notes
路
View notes