#ive been a witch for 12 years and it happened for the first time like 2 days ago but. its not impossible.

[thornsandbrambles]

okay real talk put wards on your sleeping self sometimes shit will just attacka you while ur dreaming and you wake up like what the fuck was that. while you dream you're more vulnerable to all kinds of things and spirits/demons/etc can and will take advantage of that if you are in the wrong place at the wrong time.

[peachscribe]

peach’s summer book list

i had a lot of fun compiling the list of books i read during the 20-21 winter, so i decided i would do a summer one as well! i still have a lot of books i own but haven’t read, so im definitely not lacking in material

if you didn’t see my winter list, how my book list works is basically like this: i read a book that i own but have not previously read, write a short summary immediately after finishing the book, write down my thoughts on the book, and then provide a rating for the book. i also might include background info on why i read this particular book/feelings about the author, but that depends on the book. that’s how each entry works

without further ado, let’s get started!

1. Grasshopper Jungle by Andrew Smith

okay so i absolutely adore another book by andrew smith (written after grasshopper jungle) called the alex crow. it’s one of my favorite books of all time, so naturally i wanted to see if grasshopper jungle would make me feel similarly. just like the alex crow, grasshopper jungle’s plot is. so fucking weird. it stars austin szerba, a teenage polish kid who lives in ealing, iowa, and is often sexually confused regarding his girlfriend shann and his best friend robby. and in ealing, iowa, austin and robby accidentally and unknowingly unleash an unstoppable army of huge six-foot-tall praying mantis bugs that only want to do two things: fuck and eat. and i just have to say: andrew smith’s got an absolutely dynamo writing style. alex crow is similar, where it’s a book about kind of everything all at once, framed in a moment centering around teenage boys. it’s fantastic, and it’s more than a little gross, and i love it. this book made me feel so many things, and i thought austin was such an amazing narrator and main character to identify with. this book has it all: shitty teenage boy humor, fucked up science experiments, and poetic imagery that will make you want to cry. and explicit lgbt characters.

412/10 andrew smith what do you put in your water i just want to know

2. Burn by Patrick Ness

patrick ness has written a plethora of some of my favorite books (such as a monster calls, the chaos walking trilogy, and the rest of us just live here) so when i saw this one in the store i knew it would be a great one. burn is an alternate history fantasy that takes place in 1957 frome, washington, during the height of the cold war, and it begins with a girl named sarah and her father hiring a dragon to help out on their farm. but there’s not just dragons, farm living, and cold war tensions; there’s also a really shitty small town cop, a cult of dragon worshippers and their deadly teenage assassin, a pair of fbi agents, and a prophecy that sarah’s newly hired dragon claims she’s a part of. i think eoin colfer’s highfire was on my winter list, which also featured a story that included dragons and shitty cops, so when i first began burn i thought it was funny to have two books that had both things. you know, if you had a nickel etc etc. but that’s really where the similarities end because burn is entirely it’s own monster (dragon). burn is entirely invested in its world, and its fascinating. not only that, i had no clue where the book would take me next. there were so many surprises and amazing twists that honestly just blew me away. this book also includes beautifully written complicated discussions on family, race, and love - it features interracial and queer romances as the two most prominent romance plots which was such a nice surprise from a book i wasn’t expecting to have that kind of representation. this book is witty, fast-paced, and a very heartening read - i absolutely adored it.

9/10 dragons and becoming motivated by the power of love and friendship are so fucking cool

3. As Meat Loves Salt by Maria McCann

i hate this book! as meat loves salt is a historical fiction novel which takes place in seventeenth century england, which is going through a grisly civil war. the protagonist, jacob cullen, is a servant for a wealthy household and is engaged to another servant in the house. but due to certain events that are almost entirely jacob’s fault, he flees the house and is separated from his wife. from there, he joins the royal army and meets a kind soldier, ferris, and the two become fast friends. jacob and ferris’s relationship begins to bridge past friendly, and jacob struggles with his homoerotic feelings as well as the growing obsession and violence inside him. also, they try to start a colony. listen, i don’t know how to describe the book because so much happens, but it basically just follows jacob and all the terrible decisions he makes because he is, truly, a terrible person. ferris is kind and good, and jacob is scum of the earth. he sucks so bad. the entire time i was reading this book (which took absolutely so long), all i wanted was for jacob to just get his ass handed to him. i wanted to see him suffer. and it’s not like i just personally don’t like him - i believe the book purposefully depicts him as unsympathetic even though he is the narrator. i did enjoy the very in depth and accurate portrayal of what life would’ve been like in seventeenth century england, and i think it was interesting to read a character that is just the absolute worst person you’ve ever encountered and see him try and justify his actions, so if you enjoy that kind of thorough writing, then this book would be perfect for you. however, i did not see that bitch ass motherfucker jacob cullen suffer enough. i’d kill him with my bare hands.

2/10 diversity win! the worst man on earth is mlm!

4. This Savage Song by Victoria Schwab

i know ive had a friend tell me how great one of schwab’s other book series is, but truthfully i bought this book because the cover is sick as hell and it was on a table in the store that advertised for buy two get one free, i think. something like that. anyway, this savage song takes place in a future in which monsters, for whatever reason, suddenly became real and out for blood in a mysterious event nicknamed the phenomenon. august flynn is one of these monsters, but he takes no pride in that fact and only wants to feel human. kate harker is the daughter of a ruthless man and is trying her hardest to be ruthless, too, but deep down she knows it’s just an act. their city, verity, stands divided, and kate and august stand on either side - but when august is sent on a mission to befriend kate in the hopes of stopping an all out war, the lines begin to blur. this book rules. august and kate are such interesting and dynamic characters, and the narrative is familiar while still being capable of twisting the story around and taking the feet out from under you in really compelling ways. this savage song is part of the monsters of verity duology, and i can’t wait to dive into how the story continues and finishes.

11/10 sometimes you can judge a book by it’s cover

4a. Our Dark Duet by Victorian Schwab

this is the sequel and finale for this savage song and i’d figure i’d update everyone: fantastic ending, beautiful, showstopping, painful.

12/10 loved it and will definitely be keeping an eye out for schwab’s other books

5. White is for Witching by Helen Oyeyemi

oh boy. okay. white is for witching is about a house, and it is about the women who have lived inside of it. when her mother dies abroad, miranda silver begins to act strangely, and there’s nothing her father or her twin brother seem to be able to do about it. she develops an eating disorder and begins to hear voices in the silver family house, converted to a bed and breakfast by miranda’s dad; and she begins to lose herself in the house and the persistent presence of her family legacy. white is for witching switches perspective dizzingly and disorientingly between miranda, her twin eliot, miranda’s friend from school named ore, and the house itself. this story is a horror story as much as it as a tragedy as much as it is a romance as much as it is a bunch of other things. oyeyemi brings race, sexuality, nationality, and family into this story and forces you not to look away. this book is poetry.

(like i mentioned briefly, this book heavily deals with topics of race and closely follows miranda’s eating disorder. read responsibly, and take care of yourselves)

15/10 this book consumed me and i think i’ll have to read it another 10 more times to feel it properly

6. These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong

okay. okay. strap in for a ride. these violent delights is a romeo and juliet style story, taking place in glittering 1920’s shanghai. the city stands divided - not only between the foreign powers encroaching on chinese land, but also between the scarlet gang and the white flowers, who are at the height of a generations-long blood feud. juliette cai, heir to the scarlets, has recently returned from four years abroad and is determined to prove herself ruthless enough to lead. roma montagov, heir to the white flowers, is standing strenuously on his place as next in line due to a slip up four years prior and is desperate to keep hold of his title. and in the midst of juliette and roma’s burning history with each other threatening to combust, an unnatural monster lurks in the waters of shanghai, loosing a madness on scarlets and white flowers alike. this book has it all - scorned ex lovers, political intrigue, deadly monsters, and all set on a glamorous backdrop of the roaring twenties. i absolutely was enraptured by this book and the way it plays around the story of romeo and juliet so well that it easily became it’s own monster, but with the punches and embraces of something classically shakespearan. gong does just an absolutely breathtaking job of fitting this fantastical story amid the larger world of shanghai and the real life historical events that had shaken the city to its core. completely immersive and outstandingly heart racing.

17/10 i was chewing on my fingernails for the last thirty pages and will continue to do so until the sequel is released (our violent ends, 16 nov 21)

7. The Antiques by Kris D’Agostino

you ever heard of the american dysfunctional family story? this is most definitely that. at the same time george westfall’s cancer takes a turn for the worse, a hurricane hits the east coast, and suddenly all at once the issues of his health, the hurricane, and all three of his children’s achingly dysfunctional adult lives are crashing into each other. reunited by george’s death, the westfall siblings have to face their grief, each other, and the problems in their own lives they attempted to put on hold while planning their father’s memorial. this is a nice story about grief and loss and love and somehow finding the humor amidst it all.

(this book does include a depiction of an autistic child who does experience several pretty bad meltdowns due to ignorant people around him not understanding how to cater to his needs. im not an authority on what depictions are or are not harmful, but i do believe this depiction is ultimately loving and well-intended.)

7/10 it made me laugh and cry and was generally one of those books that somehow hit you close to home

8. Fierce Fairytales by Nikita Gill

fierce fairytales is a poetry anthology that reimagines classic fairytales from a modern, feminist viewpoint, acknowledging that the line between hero and villain, monster and damsel, are not as clear cut as the classics try to make you believe. this book also includes illustrations done by the author herself, which i think is really cool. my personal favorite story reimagining was the story of peter pan and captain hook, called ‘boy lost’ which looked at how peter and hook’s relationship began and rotted. all in all, i think this collection of stories had a lot of important things to say and said them in frank, easy to understand poetry and prose.

7/10 beautiful message and pretty prose, but at times a little cliche

and that’s all from the summer! my fall semester starts tomorrow, and overall i feel very good about all the reading i did this summer. i even read four other books not on this list for work! so i definitely feel like i made the most out of my time, and im really glad i was able to read so many stories that made me feel a variety of different things

thanks so much for reading this list, and let me know if you read or have read any of these books and tell me what you think of them!

happy reading<3

[rumor-imbris]

Hello, Lady Connor! I want to ask out of unbearable, suffocating curiosity in my heart, even though in the previous post you already said to not mention "that certain comic". Could you please enlighten me about your view on that comic and what you despise about it? I would love to read your detailed thoughts about it even if just once. But if this is too triggering for you, I'm truly sorry for your discomfort and you don't need to answer it.

Hello, dear Anon and welcome ^-^ It's weird you naturally called me Lady Connor, as usually only my little fairy @giuliettaluce does. Well, I guess her magic put a spell on everybody here!!

If you really care to know, I'll answer, but brace yourself, it's going to be very long, almost an essay, because I can be very detailed about that comic being a failure in its every part. There's so much to say. You're right, as I mentioned before, it can trigger me, but I have attentively analized it and I know it makes not a single atom of sense. So nothing can actually bother me that much, don't worry ^_-

First of all, my general consideration of the AC Reflections comic issue #4, (yeah, that thing -.-) is that of a mere attempt to desperately make Bayek's remote vision through Senu's eyes a canon feature. It was created and published in 2017, the same year AC Origins was released and yes, they needed an excuse to make believe Connor's alleged daughter inherited a skill someone (who isn't even their direct ancestor!!) that lived 1700 years ago in ancient Egypt had! OMG, this should be funny enough, but I'll go on. Also, I think it was likely a carelessly arranged way to satisfy those AC3 fans demanding a "happy ending" for unlucky Connor (quite 5 years later, of course).

I'll better go step by step to figure out where to start from, seriously.

1) In the comic, when Otso Berg opens the file related to Connor, the scene is set in "1796: Upstate New York." Now this is chronologically and spacially incoherent and illogical. We see Connor still wears his assassin outfit in it, right? According to AC Initiates (2012) in 1804 Connor invites the Dominican assassin Eseosa at the Davenport homestead to provide him some advices and further training as he's involved in the leading of the Haitian Revolution. That's a really cool character, read about him, if you want!

So, until then Connor is still an assassin, probably the mentor (by now) of the Colonial Brotherhood. He still runs the homestead and he still commands the Aquila, I guess, he's the captain still. I calculated the distance between the homestead and the then upper NY frontier territories is approximately 260 miles (quite far nowadays with cars and planes as well). Then, why the hell should he have a family located in the forest upstate NY? It sounds very unconfortable to run back and forth to reach them and go back to take care of all the Brotherhood matters, doesn't it? Unless he knew about teleportation!!! Also, wow, he lives all alone in a nice massive villa with all the comforts of that time while his children and wife still live in a Native village constantly menaced by settlers wanting to steal their land? Beside the fact that Connor, at least in my point of view, seemed at last very familiar with european way of living by the end of the game, this leads us to the next point.

2) By the time the game and the comic are set (second half of 18th century), most of the East Coast Native tribes were facing the tragic and forced migration to western and northern territories (mostly towards Canada, protected by the British) because of all the consequences of the Revolutionary War (lost territories, failed alliances, settlers advancing and buying their lands and so on). So tells us history, unfortunately. It's a fact. And this is wisely showed to us in the AC3 main game when, after all the Kanien'kehá:ka tribes had left the territory around Connor's village (yes, even those near New York, to be clear) even Connor's own tribe at last migrates west, leaving an empty ghost village. They had remained all along to protect the secret temple, but in the end they as well were forced to leave. So, to me it's highly improbable that in upstate NY, one could still find a tribe and even if so, that Connor would let his family live there and risk their safety everyday.

3) The whole comic plot revolves around the fact that Io:nhiòte has a "special gift"... She inexplicably knows how to read the ground and find animal traces, she also can perform a perfect twisted acrobatic flip in the air and land unharmed to the ground. Do we know why? No, don't ask! xD She simply knows U.U, even if right after the next scene she slips and falls miserably down a cliff xD, but... ok!! Beside that, when Connor is far away to search for some water and is about to be attacked by a wolf hidden in the grass nearby, she sees the whole scene from the eyes of an eagle flying in the sky above her. As I said before, this reminds us of Bayek's (never clearly explained) ability to see through his eagle Senu's eyes and spot dangers and enemies. Now can you tell me why the hell this little girl has super powers and a skill Bayek had? As I said, they are not even directely related, as Bayek is not one of Desmond Miles' ancestor, we know him simply because Layla's new Animus is magical and can inexplicably read fragmented DNA from people who died a thousand years ago (it can also prepair coffee, I think!). So, where did she get that from? Magic? Mysteries of life? Convenient improbable connections for marketing's sake? We'll never know and you should simply accept that and ask no question!

4) From her height, way of speaking/moving/running, I assume Io:nhiòte is at least 8 years old, 8 - 9 minimum. She's the youngest of three siblings, who must be at least two years older than her and than each other (according to a human woman pregnancy timing!). If the comic events are set 12 years after the main game ending (1784, when Connor also starts to train the young ex-slave Patience Gibbs, arriving at the Davenport homestead with Aveline De Grandpré, according to AC IV Black Flag bonus mission with Aveline), so, this means that in that same year Connor must have found hastily the love of his life in a Native village (as if he was easy to open himself with other people after all he's been through), married her, impregnated her and seen her give birth to their first child, all in the same year when (let's not foget! xD) he still is the leader of the Colonial Assassin Brotherhood at the Davenport homestead training novices. Now, this may even be possible humanly speaking, (well, if you force the things a bit and hurry up!) but highly unlikely to happen!! xD

These are the main problems affecting the logic of the comic in my opinion, the points making its foundations crumble apart. Though I'm sure there are many little others to point out, such as Otso Berg "opening" Connor's files... like what? Where did those data come out from? I remember playing AC IV Black Flag and uncovering a file where Abstergo researchers themselves closed access to his memories as there was "nothing appealing to this character anymore"! So, if no more researches were conducted on him since 2013, where did Mr Berg magically or conveniently discovered such data in 2017?

Or... do we want to talk about the cover? It shows Connor in the spirit outfit from the Tyranny of King Washington DLC, which has apparently nothing to do with the comic, since it is set in his present day and he wears his assassin standard robe. Now, I think that can be either a simple marketing choice to make the comic more appealing, as... well, that cover is so cool, let's admit that, or maybe the subtle suggestion that the events told in it are just a parallel Disney-like reality and are not to be considered true at all! xD i don't know, maybe both explanations are right.

I'm sure that the deeper i dig, the more nothing rational I'll find!

If you played the old games, if you know well the franchise and its lore, the true, good, old AC lore, you definitely realize by yourself how that comic is useless and senseless.

This doesn't mean I do not wish an "happy ending" for Connor. But I'd rather accept something coherent with the main game events and AC chronology. Also, it doesn't necessarily needs to be a "happy" ending, as they conveniently created to please complaining fans. I wished for something real... coherent with his personality, acquired life-style and endless sense of duty and values.

Maybe that's what pushed me to write my FanFic novel in the first place, after all... To give him MY OWN cohesive ending, including my love, for love is always needed, I guess.

I'm so sorry if the answer took this long in time and words, but you were warned! ^w^

Though, thank you... Seriously, thank you so much for asking. You made me reflect once more about this matter.

Come visit me again, if you want. Take care

- Rumor Imbris 🦋

P.S. Oh, and if you're interested, this is my "jelousy song", for when things like this trigger my inner witch!! xD

[ruby-read]

mid-year book freak out tag! - 2021

best book so far

a court of mist and fury by sarah j maas - 5 / 5 stars

need i say more? it was just so good.

best sequel so far

bitterblue by kristin cashore - 5 / 5 stars

i don't think i have talked about the graceling realm series and how much i love it on here but here i am.

i loved every book in this series but bitterblue stood out to me because even though it was incredibly long, it kept me gripped throughout. there was an unsolvable mystery (maybe im dense though) that kept me guessing for hundreds of pages and just a glimmer of romance which i usually miss when its not there but this stood on its own without it.

i thought bitterblue was an extremely strong character and it was a great ending to a companion trilogy (before winterkeep was announced and continued it). also, loved seeing all of the characters come together at the end and seeing katsa and po pop in and out.

new release i haven't read yet but want to

the nature of witches by rachel griffin realm breaker by victoria aveyard

something about witches and elemental magic just sounds so awesome to me and i am just so drawn to this book.

and i am currently enjoying the red queen series and love a good found family so im hoping to love realm breaker. ive heard mixed things so im gonna lower my expectations a little but still excited.

most anticipated release for the second half of the year

these hollow vows by lexi ryan aurora's end by *** ******** graceling: the graphic novel by kristin cashore six crimson cranes by elizabeth lim the hawthorne legacy by jennifer lynn barnes

idk why i am so excited about these hollow vows but i am and i think it's just gonna be a (hopefully) exciting fantasy romance. im hoping for two sexy men and a bad BITCHHH of a main character.

ive heard only amazing things about six crimson cranes so i am very very excited! i've been waiting for this book i think since january and its almost finally here!

aurora's end (even though the authors are cancelled) i NEED to finish the series then they will officially never receive my money again. the cliffhanger at the end of aurora burning was so incredibly uncool and so now i have no choice but to see what happens in the finale.

the graceling graphic novel. do i need to explain myself?

and the hawthorne legacy is the next installment in the inheritance games series and i really enjoyed the first book! the mystery and the way patterns were worked into it really had me intrigued and i was itching to know what was happening for the entire book. so excited to see what happens in the next one!

biggest disappointment

the crown of gilded bones by jennifer l armentrout - currently on pause/possible dnf

this book was just so boring but also SO much happened in the first 50 pages that i was honestly incredibly confused? and there was just overwhelming info-dumping about the history of the world and an underdeveloped plot. idk i just couldn't get into it (which was really disappointing bc i loved akofaf). thinking of dnfing...

biggest surprise

crown of midnight by sarah j maas - 4.5 / 5 stars

ok so. i really did not enjoy throne of glass. after reading the acotar series and then jumping into throne of glass, i hated the love triangle, the intrigue wasnt enough to get me engaged until the last third, etc. sooo i was even considering not reading the rest of the series. but of course like the sjm stan that i am, i had to. and this one was so good. i wrote a review on it so if your interested in more in depth thoughts go take a peak!

favorite new author (debut or new to me)

kristin cashore!

the way that she writes political mystery in her world is so good. not a single time did i have a correct guess on what was happening. i also loved how her books had strong woman main characters, but they all had agency in a different way. and how the romance subplots were small but enough to keep the romantic in me satisfied, but also didnt take away from the main heroines story. ugh just so good! love u girly <3

new fictional crush

aaron warner (shatter me series by tahereh mafi)

ok i know hes kind of like super crazy and kind of creepy obsessed, but also like.... cmon. hes kinda super hot too. and i kind of love the i hate everyone but you trope....

art credit: @jessdraw.s

new favorite character

lara (bridge kingdom series by danielle l jensen)

her strength, her agency, her ability to unlearn everything she grew up believing, her power. an amazing and complex character.

art credit: @rosiesfables

books that made me cry

a court of wings and ruin by sarah j maas

if you've read this book u understand why. there was a happy ending for our two main characters at the end but the war that ensued at the end of this book was just fucking heart wrenching and so beautiful at parts i will never forget everything that happened.

books that made me happy

heartstopper vol. 1 by alice oseman

i feel like this series is great for young readers (12-17). it teaches about friendship, sexuality, mental health, asking for help, how to offer help, etc. and tons of really diverse representation throughout. i wish this existed when i was younger.

it made me happy to think about young people reading this series and feeling seen and validated. and about how openly alice oseman illustrates difficult topics and how to deal with them. just made my heart swell.

most beautiful book bought/gifted so far

the ones we're meant to find by joan he

i mean... its gorgeous!!

books i need to read by the end of the year

crescent city by sarah j maas

again as a stan i need to finish this before the end of the year bc i have only heard good things and the second book comes out jan 2022.

favorite book to movie adaptation so far

moxie, shadow and bone, brigerton lol (and very excited about along for the ride!!)

2021 reading stats so far...

45 books read

35,000 pages read

11 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ reads

4.13 average rating

thanks so much for reading my mid-year update! happy reading! : )

[tirorah]

Road to Berlin’s Episode 12 Is a Spectacular Finish to a Spectacular Show

It was damn good!

After the slightly tame setup Episode 11 provided, it fell to Episode 12 to deliver the payoff not just to the finale that Episode 10 started, but also to wrap up the overarching story of the entire season. And oh boy, did it do just that!

First, let’s talk about our favorite looming antagonists with barely any world-building, the Neuroi! Well, they once again upped the creepy factor by replicating World Capital Germania. How they managed to do this is still unclear, as the city never left the planning stage; it truly does seem like the Neuroi don’t just consume for sustenance or whatever, but also that they can replicate whatever they find in the territory they conquer. Of course, none of this matters much to the story at hand, but it does give us a tiny bit of world-building on them, and it would also explain some of the more bizarre Neuroi designs. Do you remember the Cube Neuroi? I do.

I was also intrigued by this former emperor of Karlsland who designed the plans for Germania. Whoever they were, they were forced to step down, but this raises all kinds of questions. When did this happen? How long has Emperor Frederick IV been in power? What does the mere existence of these plans imply about Karlsland’s history?

By the by, the building that was never in the plans seems to resemble the Great Hall, which was, in fact, shelved due to the start of WW2. Strike Witches occasionally gets some stuff hilariously wrong, but much of the research definitely seems on the money.

See, as far as I know, Nazism doesn’t exist in Karlsland. (Actually, that’d be pretty awkward for Karlsland, with the 501st’s logo being the way it is...) Judea was wiped out by Neuroi in the year 29; this, and several other differences in the world’s history, produced a different world than the one we know. (See the Strike Witches Historical Timeline for more information.) Culturally, Karlsland is far more akin to Imperial Germany, but transplanted into the 1940s and borrowing some iconography and designs.

There WAS tension in Europe before the Neuroi showed up and forced everyone to unite against a common enemy; would that have been enough incentive to create these plans, as well as structures like the Flak Tower? I hope we’ll find out someday. Either way, the fact the Neuroi created such an intricate city-shaped structure based on nothing but plans on paper is pretty terrifying. What else did the overrun countries have lying around when they were invaded?

Right, well, enough about the ancillary stuff. Let’s talk characters!

And cutting right to the chase: Shizuka definitively earned her spot on the team this episode. Yes, I know she technically earned it in the Movie at the earliest, and I guess Episode 10 at the latest. But Episode 10 still left me a bit wanting, as it was part of the process of building up to Shizuka’s turning point as a character. But now we reached that moment at long last, and it was everything I’d hoped to see.

First, RtB shows us how far she’s come. Her determination is nothing short of epic; she’s grown so much since her first engagement in the Movie, and nowhere is that more obvious than here. She lands a difficult shot on the bomb while flying a Striker her magic can’t handle, to the point where it’s physically hurting her to breathe. And then, she sees Yoshika trapped down below, and she finally passes the point of no return.

For the entire season, Shizuka’s been utterly obedient when it came to orders. As soon as someone dropped that o-word, she’d stop whatever action she was entertaining and went along with what she was told, even if it didn’t sit entirely well with her at times. She still does that at first, actually. But then, she finally sees something she can’t walk away from, and she decides to risk her own life to protect the girl who always throws herself into danger for others.

She saves Yoshika’s life, and even though she’s definitely not sounding well, she then takes up the fight in her friend’s defense without a single ounce of hesitation. Her switch from defense to offense is almost explosive; no talking, no checking on Yoshika, just straight-up switching on a dime. And her valiant stand is successful!

Until this happens, and once again I have to commend everyone involved in RtB on the gravity of this scene. Shizuka’s injury is devastating. The cinematography is chilling and incredibly well done: the way the beam punches through the profile shot of her body; how the beam takes all the colors with it as it leaves the screen, monochrome swiftly washing over the scene in its wake, Shizuka already pale; the trails of blood; the dilated eyes. They don’t show her crash, but it sounds awful. And then there’s the blood, positively pouring out of the hole in her body, spilling out until it even reaches Yoshika’s knees, a symbol for Yoshika failing to save her.

As the scene dragged on and Yoshika became increasingly frantic, fear slowly trickled into me again. Strike Witches doesn’t kill characters, but Shizuka was dying for sure. I was still holding on to the hope that everything would turn out okay, but there didn’t seem to be any way out, and that was a gut-punch and a half. It was seriously upsetting, and in a good way: that moment when you realize you do, in fact, care about a character whose presence you’ve questioned for the entire season.

I’d never been so happy to see a Deus Ex Yoshika hit the screen.

Now, I'm not the biggest fan of Yoshika. I do like her as a concept: the pacifist medic thrown into war. But I still feel like Yoshika’s character leans too much on her desire to protect people. It worked well at first, especially when her new companions needed someone to give them hope, but while quite a few characters showed growth as time went on, Yoshika’s always remained relatively static. And RtB’s excellent character writing has only emphasized this for me.

That’s not to say she hasn’t grown into a badass though, because she has! This episode had her at her craziest yet, leveraging the power of her grief to jump-start her magic back to normal levels. And with the fine magic control she’s been forced to work on all season, she can finally let loose and do some incredible things!

A giant shield? Try more than one! Who needs a gun when you can use your magic as a battering ram? (Trude would be so proud!) And sure, just pump so much power into your Striker that you overtake the escaping Bell-type Neuroi holding Wolf! I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Yoshika attained her final form of hax, and it was glorious.

Still, it was clear that battle, short as it was, took a toll on her. This means she’s not exactly all-powerful; it just so happens that she has some very powerful genes, and the right motivation to use them.

Anyway, it was to be expected that Yoshika and Shizuka would hog the spotlight for a bit in this final episode, and that’s all good. The others mostly filled their usual roles, but we did get some great character moments from them!

Let’s start with something adorable: Minna using Sanya as a portable telephone, and Sanya being entirely stoic about it. I was laughing so much, and even more so when Eila saw it happen!

“GYAAH!”

I also liked it when Eila and Sanya were so surprised at seeing so many Neuroi swarms that Sanya said this absolutely needless thing:

You know the shit’s hit the fan when Sanya, of all people, does this.

Oh, and let’s not forget: it was Eila and Sanya who finished off the dome! I’m not sure why everyone else decided to just fly off, but these two have their backs.

Shirley and Lucchini were a solid team. I liked how each of their personalities shone through in their mannerisms and dialogue, with Shirley being calm, perceptive and responsible, as well as looking out for Lucchini. She also made a good guess at Wolf’s hiding place.

Lucchini, meanwhile, was her adorable hyper self, chafing at the narrow tunnels which prevented her from bouncing around, and later, gleefully taking out one Neuroi tower, only to realize she was shooting at the wrong thing, and being utterly unconcerned as she switched targets. Nyroom! She’s such a playful kid.

I also really liked it when Wolf was running away, and Lucchini immediately looked to Shirley to chase it, but Shirley realized she couldn’t catch it from that distance. She’s come to understand her limits over the course of the series, which pairs well with her increased sense of responsibility in RtB.

Lynne and Perrine were once again the support squad, looking out for Shizuka and later on being quite attuned to anything regarding Yoshika. Unfortunately, they didn’t do much else of note, but that’s been a bit of a pattern for them since Episode 8. Either way, I’ll save my thoughts on that for the full season review. (Yes, I’m going to rant about the season in its entirety next. No one is surprised.)

Erica mostly fell into the same support role as Lynne and Perrine this episode, but she did make the highly useful observation of the anomaly in Germania: the big central building that hadn’t been in the plans. And of course, she was one of the determined Karlslander Witches who chased Wolf at the end, limits be damned.

Hey, while we’re on this pic: I’m pretty sure Mio has spent more time with Ursula than with Minna this season. How crazy is that?!

Mio was also here. I’m sad that we didn’t get a Mio Laugh, not even one at the end. I did enjoy how concerned she was about Shizuka’s well-being though; Mio is like Trude in that she’s quite married to her job (she’s even worse about that than Trude), and so her personal feelings can sometimes end up left behind. But she was still doing everything she could to help her friends, and she was genuinely terrified when she realized Shizuka was about to do something dangerous.

Before I forget, I even have to give a slight nod to Patton. He was good in this episode! Even though he loaded up his revolver, he never actually ended up using it; instead, he was a good supporting character. Even his “GODDAMU” was endearing!

Last but certainly not least, Minna and Trude were, again, excellent. I really loved how they worked together this episode: forming a united front when they told Shizuka she had to stay behind (like two parents telling their new kid to do what’s best for her, ha), and Minna using her reasoning and magic to navigate them through the tunnels while Trude smashed stuff.

Ah yes, Trude. Lovely, lovely Trude. When I wrote about Episode 11, I expressed bewilderment at her sudden suggestion of using the underground tunnels. How did she come by this information? Why did Minna not know? But Episode 12 had my back; Erica asked her about it almost immediately, and as it turned out, Trude had the most adorable reason of all time OMG:

All is forgiven, show. All is forgiven. The fact Trude learned everything about a subway system in a city Chris never even lived in, just to engage with her sister’s interests, is so downright cute and awesome that my love for her has once again increased to previously unimaginable levels. And she memorized it all so damn well that she planned out an entire route into the dome for them! This is the best thing ever!

I was also so, so happy for Minna at the end! In previous seasons, it was always Yoshika who dealt the final blow to their antagonist, but here, Yoshika only prevented Wolf from running away. It was Trude and Erica who pierced its defenses, and it was Minna who went in for the kill. Not only is this amazingly cathartic for her, it’s also something Minna 100% earned in this season. Episode 9 did so well in showing us how badly Minna wanted this, to secure victory for her girls and for herself, to the point where she disregarded her own views on self-sacrifice. And now here she was, maybe in the last sortie of her career, and she received the sweetest reward of all.

...Except the promised coffee in Berlin, which we never got! But that’s okay; this episode already did so much in its runtime, I can’t fault it for not showing us something that would take some time to happen.

Instead, we got something equally satisfying, and something I loved about the ending: it showed us everyone working hard to rebuild Berlin after the battle. RtB has been so good at details, at continuity and consequences, and here, we see that life moves on. Berlin is in ruins, and it’s going to take a lot of elbow grease to get it and the rest of northern Karlsland back into shape. But with people returning and the 501st doing everything they can to help, reconstruction will surely succeed.

And Perrine will one day conquer the world with her army of adopted children!

Life also moved on in a different way. As it turned out (or maybe I just forgot about this?), Wolf was one of two hives in Karlsland. The other one is located somewhere in the south, and thus, the 501st continues their battle for peace. I wonder if this means we’ll get more 501st content down the line? It hasn’t been ruled out, and it’d be amazing to see where these girls go next. (I demand more coffee scenes!)

[kickdownthewalls]

TOP 20 ROCK/METAL ALBUMS OF 2019

Been looking back at the list I made last year and it is hard to say if 2019 was better or not. I feel like, if nothing else, there were fewer let-downs and more out-of-the blue surprises, so I guess that means it was an improvement. For anyone who says there are no good metal albums coming out these days, I say they just need to dig a little. So many great bands have been forming in recent years and started looking back to the origins of metal before death and black metal ruled the world. Since that was the era I grew up in, it isn’t too surprising that a lot of my choices this year hark back to earlier times. Case in point…

20. BEWITCHER - Under the Witching Cross 

First up is one of many bands to put a modern spin on a retro sound and this one is even from the PNW (Portland). In this case, the most obvious comparison is early Venom. “Hexenkrieg” even has a chorus like “Acid Queen” and a bridge straight outta “1000 Days in Sodom.” Lyrically, Bewitcher may be even more primitive, with lots of references to Satan, goats, and witching of all sorts. Musically, however, they do show some real diversity and skills, mixing up lightning-fast tunes with slower, pounding metal. No sophomore slump here, thank Satan.

19. INCULTER - Fatal Visions

Norway is starting to establish itself as a home for raw and brutal old-school thrash metal, with the likes of Condor, Deathhammer, and Nekromantheon delivering some wildly OTT albums in recent years. Inculter are a bit newer but really impressed with their debut in 2015 and are back with an even more lethal release in 2019. The riffing is relentless, although the band does do a good job of mixing up the tempos throughout. Still, fast thrash with touches of early Sodom and Sepultura is the core of Inculter’s sound and it is the perfect soundtrack for getting out your aggression here at civilization’s end. 

18. MIDNIGHT PRIEST - Aggressive Hauntings

I’ve been following this Portuguese outfit since their debut nearly a decade ago and have seen a solid increase in songwriting and production, along with a solidification of style. Many bands have stolen King Diamond’s sound and style, but Midnight Priest use it as a jumping-off point into a realm of their own. The vocals cover a great range with theatrical lyrics of hauntings, convents, and candles, while the music is firmly in the classic 80s vein with some wildly catchy riffs that remind me as much of Priest and Accept as they do King and Fate. 

17. FATAL CURSE - Breaking the Trance

Hailing from the middle of upstate New York, this power trio has more in common with their NWOBHM-loving brethren across the northern border than they do most US bands. Fortunately, they pull it off with the effortlessness only a group of dyed-in-the-wool fans of the music can. Songs like “Can’t Stop the Thunder” and the title track overflow with pure, punchy energy that reminds me of the heyday of Diamond Head and Jaguar. It’s a short but power-packed debut that bodes well for the band’s future. 

16. BABYMETAL - Metal Galaxy

Although this might seem out of place, I’ve always had a love for electronic dance music and this is the best combination of metal and dance I’ve heard yet. While the first two Babymetal records had a cool sound, they felt kind of samey and it was hard to really remember any of the individual tracks. Not so here. “Da Da Dance” is pure anime energy, while “Shanti Shanti Shanti” incorporates Indian instrumentation and melodies and “Oh! MAJINAI” can only be called a pirate anthem. Even “PA PA YA!!” with its rap bridge totally rocks. Some folks are turned off by ‘manufactured’ bands like this, which I totally get, but I’m more interested in the results and “Metal Galaxy” is a really solid, diverse album that I’ve come back to many times already. 

15. IRON GRIFFIN - Curse of the Sky

Finland is apparently the world’s capitol of metal (most bands per capita) and represents all types well. Iron Griffin is a thoroughly original and enjoyable mix of 70s occult and hard rock, early USPM, and classic epic metal. The production is nice and organic, with each instrument shining through, especially the bass. Vocalist Maija Tiljander can deliver the mellow and screaming parts with equal panache, while all of the instruments are handled by Oskari Räsänen (drummer of the divine Mausoleum Gate). If you enjoyed their EP, this album is 100% better and that is saying something. 

14. VIGILANCE - Enter the Endless Abyss

Haven’t heard too many Slovenian heavy metal bands (Hellcats is the only other one I can think of), but Vigilance is quite impressive in both delivery and originality. Their style is a fairly complex mix of classic, speed, and black metal. The riffing is solid, with plenty of Maiden-esque harmonies to be had, while the vocals are gruff in the vein of Amok-era Sentenced. Every song is a bit of a journey, without being overblown, and it makes for a very satisfying album experience. 

13. TANITH - In Another Time

After being blown away by their performance at Frost & Fire IV, I was very pleased to see Tanith sign with Metal Blade and release a killer debut. Trying to describe the band’s sound is difficult, as they incorporate a lot of different elements. There is a definite 70s vibe and some early prog-rock influences at work, with complex song structures that thankfully never get self-indulgent. The blending of male and female clean vocals is another highlight and both work remarkably well with the melodic riffs. The bass playing is also worth noting, as it winds its way through each song in perfect counterpoint to whatever the guitar happens to be doing. Bonus points for writing a song about the Cassini probe and its journey to Saturn.

12. ATLANTEAN KODEX - The Course of Empire

When I hear the term ‘epic metal,’ this is exactly what comes to mind. It incorporates the most grandiose elements of bands like Manowar, Bathory, and Solstice, but Atlantean Kodex somehow take it to the next level. This isn’t a collection of catchy songs, it is a weighty opus that you need to sit back and let cascade over you. It has been six years since their last record but you can definitely hear the time was well-spent and great care taken to craft each song just so. Although it doesn’t surpass The White Goddess in grandeur, it is close behind. 

11. SUICIDAL ANGELS - Years of Aggression

Greek thrash very much in the vein of the classics from ’88-’90. Solid production, straightforward but great riffing, and a wide range of tempos. There are songs that swing back and forth between fast and slow, some that are mid-tempo throughout, etc. I love that Suicidal Angels sound like they are equally influenced by the Germans and Bay Area thrashers equally, with nods to outliers like Sepultura and Artillery as well. The band tends to sound pretty much the same from album to album, and that is true here as well, but it feels like this is one of the best collection of songs they have put together yet. 

10. POUNDER - Uncivilized

Here is another great US band, this time formed by some death metal merchants looking to do something a bit more traditional. Pounder really do a great job covering all the bases and Uncivilized overflows with catchy riffs and melodies, anthemic choruses, and a great deal of diversity. Speed metal like “Red Hot Leather” is followed by a power ballad in the form of the AOR-tinged “Long Time No Love” and both are excellent. Shades of Rainbow permeate tracks like “The Mists of Time” and “Uncivilized.” Early Pretty Maids is a good reference point for the styles covered and the gruff but melodic vocals. Stellar debut and I’m really hoping the band forges on as I think there a great deal of potential here for even better work. 

9. TOXIKULL - Cursed and Punished

This one almost slipped under my radar but glad I managed to hear it. This is the stunning sophomore release from Portugal’s Toxikull and is prime power/speed metal with searing vocals and some of the best change-ups and most memorable choruses of the year. Imagine Judas Priest’s Painkiller with more modern production and even more adrenaline and you have a pretty good idea of what to expect. Clocking in at just over a half hour, this is a solid album that never disappoints. 

8. DESTRUCTION - Born to Perish

Destruction was never my favorite of the German thrashers but I still enjoyed most of their albums, even if they started to sound pretty much the same shortly after the reunion in 2000. I felt like something was different with this new one, as the opening snare drum assault of the title track got stuck in my head almost immediately. The overall style is still very much modern, thrashy Destruction, but there seems to be a little more melody overall and the songs feel more thought-out and memorable. It is always heartwarming to hear a band releasing one of their strongest albums this far into their career. Now we just need a US tour… 

7. MYSTIK - Mystik

Another release that I nearly missed out on is Mystik, who hail from Sweden and pack a real wallop of melodic speed metal with compelling vocals and strong choruses. The production is that perfect balance between pro and underground and gives the music a really timeless feeling. This is another short album that gets to the point and delivers, song after song. The vocals remind me a bit of early Warlock and Acid, while the music has a darker edge and the two complement each other to a T.

6. ROTTING CHRIST - The Heretics

These Greek pioneers have really walked a wide-ranging path over the years, from raw black metal to polished gothic metal, and on into uncharted realms where those elements and more all come together in sublime fashion. There is a truly epic quality to the songs on The Heretics, even with all of the songs being in the 3-5 minute range. Gruff vocals are juxtaposed with clean backing vocals and chanted choruses, with the music covering equally diverse ground. A work of startling, dark beauty and possibly my favorite Rotting Christ record to date.

5. VULTURE - Ghastly Waves & Battered Graves

This is pure German speed metal, with frantic yet melodic riffs, relentless drums, and piercing vocals. Bands like Ranger and Speedtrap brought the sound back to life a few years back and Vulture really take it to the next level. The aggression and rawness is still intact, with nods to early Exodus, but there is a keen sense of melody and strong songwriting that runs throughout the record. Plus, possibly the best album title of the year.

4. AVATARIUM - The Fire I Long For While

I have always enjoyed Avatarium’s records, this is the first time that it feels like the band has really come into its own and produced a remarkable piece of art in the process. The heavy, doomy riffs are still plentiful, but there is a deeper resonance to the melodies and riffs than ever before. The powerful vocals of Jennie-Ann Smith take the center seat, but the increased use of organ and fuzz-heavy guitars and bass really rounds out the sound. The shift from 100% Leif Edling-penned songs to the majority coming from Smith and guitarist Marcus Jidell also no doubt lends to the more unique character of The Fire I Long For (though I must say that “Epitaph of Heroes” would be right at home on Ancient Dreams). 

3. DEATH ANGEL - Humanicide

As much as I love many bay area thrash bands, I think Death Angel have secured themselves as my all-time favorite. Their first three albums are timeless and the albums since the reunion have been close behind. The worst thing I can say about any of the records is that they are good but maybe not as memorable as the ones before (notably The Evil Divide and Killing Season). Humanicide is probably my favorite since The Art of Dying, with a wide range of styles, memorable choruses, and the artistic blend of rough and polished that Death Angel does so well. 

2. SOILWORK - Verkligheten 

It has been a while since I’ve paid that much attention to Soilwork and now I wonder if I’ve been missing out because this album is a monster. The combination of styles here, from melodic death metal with blastbeats to 80s metal to frantic thrash is intoxicating and executed so perfectly, the album just blows right by. “Full Moon Shoals” exemplifies the range perfectly, with one of the best bridges I’ve heard in ages. It feels like Bjorn’s involvement in the retro-minded Night Flight Orchestra has helped to give Soilwork a broader sound as well as a tighter focus on crafting the songs into something more than just a collection of riffs. Even the bonus Underworld EP is consistently strong, while many bands would just toss their throwaway tracks on such a release. For a band’s 11th album, Verkligheten is not just above average but near the top of the band’s best works, period. 

1. SACRED REICH - Awakening 

Sacred Reich was one of the brightest stars of the late 80s thrash wave, with a strong debut and a timeless follow-up, but, like so many others, they lost their way in the 90s and eventually disbanded. Although it took the band 23 years to finally get their comeback record out, damn, it was totally worth the wait. Everything that I love about Sacred Reich is here: speedy riffs mixed with chugging mosh parts, a hypnotic rhythm section, Phil’s one-of-a-kind vocal assault, and every song a winner. Even “Death Valley,” which I didn’t care much for on first spin, has grown on me with its groovy, stoner vibe. The timing couldn’t be more perfect for Sacred Reich’s heartfelt, socially-conscious lyrics, too, and Awakening is hopefully just that: the dawn of a whole new era for OD and tha Reich! 

There may not have been any big-name releases this year, but the underground came through with a ton of brilliant new releases. Narrowing down my list to 20 was more difficult than ever this year and I’d like to mention several other bands that nearly made the list: ALCEST, ANGEL WITCH, APHRODITE, BARBARIAN, CALYX, CRYPT SERMON, DEMON HEAD, EXCUSE, HAUNT, HELLISH GRAVE, KRYPTOS, LUCIFERA, METAL INQUISITOR, ROCK GODDESS, SANHEDRIN, SCREAMER, SMOULDER, and SPIRIT ADRIFT. Definitely check out any and all of these albums, preferably on Bandcamp where you can also buy them.

With so many smaller and retro-minded bands hitting the scene this year, there were also plenty of demos, EPs and 7” singles. Among the best: BEASTMAKER, CIRITH UNGOL DENIAL OF GOD, GALAXY, HAUNT, MIDNIGHT DICE, MIDNIGHT SPELL, SHADOW WARRIOR, SOLICITOR, SOURCE, THE NIGHT ETERNAL, TYRANN, and VISIGOTH. GALAXY in particular has the potential to really be something special and I can’t wait for their next release.

Will 2020 top this year? Hard to say, but there are plenty of promising releases on the way from SODOM, HELLOWEEN, DELAIN, NIGHTWISH, DARK ANGEL, and LUCIFER. Maybe MEGADETH will surprise us with a worthy comeback, too, you never know. It will be a chaotic year for the world, no doubt, so we are going to need some good, solid metal releases to help us cope. Horns up!

[otakucalsama]

cal’s bella x crossover pairings fic recs

hello! this is cal here (obviously) and i’m just reposting this. i made it a while back, but the links didn’t work, so now i’m redoing it. this time, i’m going to make it smaller, with more posts, instead of larger in one post. so without further ado, here is my bella x the crossover pairings fic recs. also, this is only for completed fics, so if you have a story i didn’t add (that’s complete) send me a link and i’ll read it and then decide whether to add it or not. i will not, however, take any bella x edward, bella x jasper, or bella x jacob fics.

other fic recs here

last updated- 12/4/19

s u p e r n a t u r a l

d e a n x b e l l a

i. stick a fork in her by geezerwreench / m / 7-8k, one-shot / complete

Receiving another cryptic set of coordinates from their father, Sam and Dean Winchester head to the Pacific Northwest where they’re confronted by a different kind of werewolf, learn about a sparkly new type of vampire, and meet a girl who’s fed up with all of it. Written for the 2016 Fandoms Against Domestic Violence fundraiser compilation. Language, violence, character death.

ii. ever hear of cold ones by shenandoah76209 / t / 10-15k, three-shot / complete

When Dean answered the phone it was only because he saw Bobby’s number on the ID. “Yeah Bobby, what’ve you got?” What Bobby had was a Hunter up in Forks with something that sounded like a cross between a Wendigo and a Vampire. Either one of those would be trouble. A mish mash of the two? This could be nothing good.

iii. bad medicine by bertie bott / m / 15-20k, three-shot / complete

On the flight home from saving Edward in Italy, Bella has a decidedly different reaction to finding out the truth behind him abandoning her. While running from her demons, Bella crosses paths with a couple of new ones, one of which she has no desire to run from… New Moon A/U and set in the beginning of season 10 in Supernatural.

iv. azazel cullen by t1gercat / k / 30-35k, multi-chaptered / complete

During a hunt Sam Winchester gets a vision of their life-long nemesis hunting the daughter of an old friend of his father. Will they make it in time to save her? Can vampires even be possessed?

v. she’s everything by maxipoo1024 / m / 140-150k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella has spent her whole life thinking something was wrong with her, that there was a glitch in her brain. A chance encounter with the Winchesters confirms her suspicions. With a hole in her heart and an apocalypse on the horizon, can a certain Winchester brother save the world, the girl, and heal his own heart in the process? Takes place beginning of New Moon

v a m p i r e  d i a r i e s  /  o r i g i n a l s

k l a u s x b e l l a

i. she didn’t have time by lorelei candice black / t / 20-25k, multi-chaptered / complete

Loosely inspired by the song She Didn’t Have Time by Terry Clark. Bella ends up pregnant after her birthday and leaves her home. Edward left her. On the way she gets help from a witch who helps her survive and asks something of her. Bella/Klaus soul mate romance. Give it a chance and review please. Now complete.

ii. wherever this goes by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

It was simple, until it wasn’t. Bella didn’t know that when she became friends with Kol that it would bring Klaus into her life. After falling in love with the feared hybrid she comes to the conclusion that maybe he’s not meant to be hers.

iii. mystically charmed to fall for klaus by lorelei candice black / m / 140-150k, multi-chaptered / complete

Set during season 1 of TVD and at the beginning of New Moon in Twilight. Bella is a witch, the Charmed kind of witch. I borrowed some Spells for the TV show Charmed. It has the same base as my MCTF that paired Bella and Elijah, except now she’s with Klaus. Rewriting makes it LONGER. Done

iv. troublemaker by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella Swan, doppelganger, ends up being the missing piece to Klaus’s ritual. Only this sets in motion a romance that ends up being everything she could ever want. Nothing can keep these two lovers from each other, not even a new identity.

v. untouched by lorelei candice black / k+ / 2-3k, one-shot / complete / sequels- unbroken + unclaimed

PART 1 of a three part story. Bella wonders if she’ll really be happy with Edward without physical contact and staying human while he’s eternally young. She makes decisions, she sets the path for a new future. Try it please.

vi. can’t help myself by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Their first meeting was strange, but it leads to wonderful friendship. This friendships lead to something a little more special. But stupid later decisions lead to bigger problems. Hopefully, they get their happily ever after.

vii. goner by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

It was dark. Everything was dark inside and all hope was gone for her. The only thing that made her feel alive anymore was her brother. The dark was seeping into her soul and she was starting to lose the fight within herself. All it takes is the soul identical to her own to make her feel something other than sorrow.

viii. midnight love by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

She got what most people never did a final goodbye to her father. Moving to Mystic Falls with her Aunt and cousin Bella finds a new home. But Mystic Falls was the last place she ever thought she would meet her mate.

ix. salvation by ncbexie25 / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

1st place Kittyinaz WC Feb 2015. Pain immobilized him, and it was only the help of his brother, Elijah, that caused him to move some hours later. But his words stirred the drive and determination within him to a new focus that would last one thousand years. “We will bring her back, brother. And we will avenge her. Always and forever, that was our pledge. And we will stick to it.”

x. reaper twins by bitemytongue / m / 85-90k, multi-chaptered / complete / sequel- the reaping of new orleans

Bella’s life is going smoothly after the Cullen’s left, until she finds she has a twin brother & was adopted. With her new identity comes new power. Bella discovers she’s a different type of supernatural. Charlie gets a new job in Mystic Falls, Bella moves to continue her education with her brother. Bella’s mysterious identity and powers attract attention to her. M for Violence

xi. third time’s the charm by bitemytongue / m / 8-9k, one-shot / complete

Everyone has an epic love. A person you fall for so quickly and so hard that you can see forever with them. It’s that type of love that everyone aims for in their life. I’ve been alive for 38 years and a vampire for twenty of those years. In all my time I found three loves, but there was only one I wanted forever with. ONE-SHOT Rated M for Violence

xii. lifting his curse by lorelei candice black / k+ / 10-15k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella is 6 when she tells Klaus he is like THE BEAST in her book. Can True Love’s kiss really break any curse? Who is Klaus’ true love? Just a short one I’ve had in my head for a while… Might get bigger later but that’s it for now!I added Nanny’s POV, along with Elijah’s and Katerina’s.

xiii. my heart is forever yours by bitemytongue / m / 7-8k, one-shot / complete

Far before she was Bella, she was Isabelle the wife of Niklaus Mikaelson. After hiding for centuries from her love, she finally re-connects with her past. M for violence.

xiv. nobody’s fault by darkest original / t / 65-70k, one-shot / complete

When something terrible takes place, part of the solution is to find someone to place the blame on. Alaric dies, it’s Esther’s fault. Elena dies, it’s Rebekah’s fault. When will people realize that blame does not rest on a just single person’s shoulders? It rests on the shoulders of each person involved, but sometimes accidents do happen and it really is nobody’s fault. B/K

xv. the visit by louisaxo / t / 3-4k, two-shot / complete

Set five years after the Cullen’s left. Bella returns to Forks with her new husband and family in tow, but who will they run into? ONLY DISCLAIMER:I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE SHOWS OR FRANCHISES MENTIONED IN THIS STORY.

xvi. on the 5th day of christmas, my true love gave to me (5 golden rings) by meekobb / m / 5-6k, one-shot / complete

Written for winter contest on BIT, prompt cozy fire. Bella develops an unusual friendship, seeks his help after going on the run for her survival. Circling a traditional bonfire, she learns all she needs is her family. M for adult situations, violance, and fun.

xvii. of wolf and man by cuinawen / m / 2-3k, one-shot / complete

Seventh in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Klaus is being pulled towards something or someone, and he is done fighting it… Rated M for a little language and violence. One Shot.

xviii. sacrificing time by lorelei candice black / t / 25-30k, multi-chaptered / complete

What would you be willing to sacrifice to ensure the safety and happiness of the man you love and know is your Soul Mate? Bella sacrificed time. Bad people killed, good people killed and brought back, other killed and completely ignored… Rated T for safety. 8 chapters once complete. Review, please.

xix. a jump through time by lorelei candice black / t / 85-90k, multi-chaptered / complete

A few months after Edward left, Charlie announces something important to Bella and it will lead her to New Orleans. There, she finds not only her grandma but also a cousin she never knew she had and the Mickealson’s. When something terrible happen, the only way to change things is to go back in time…Can she do it?Rating for safety. Bella/Klaus, Review please COMPLETE

k o l x b e l l a

i. enchantress by bitemytongue / t / 70-75k, multi-chaptered / complete

With only a few months left until her graduation, Bella is told she’s an Enchantress. Bella adapts to her new magical powers, and decides to finally get out of Forks, and move to Mystic Falls. Charlie and Bella buy a house there Bella moves a month early to set up the house. It’s then she discovers her 2 younger cousins Elena and Jeremy have been pulled into the supernatural.

ii. the oracle by poohbearbms / m / 80-85k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella loved Edward but when he left her in the woods that day he did not know the events he set into motion. Plans three thousand years in the making are about to be set in motion due to a broken heart and a desire to find who she really was meant for. With her her gifts to help her along the way the servants of nature will learn what the true meaning of natures balance is.

iii. red string by imaginary raine / k+ / 10-15k, two-shot / complete

Theirs is a story that have spanned a thousand years. He would search for her, and she would wait for him. Because no matter how long it took, they would find each other. It was their fate. Soulmate fic. Kol/Bella

iv. their forever promise by brookie twiling / m / 4-5k, one-shot / complete

They met in a dark alley. She, born and raised in a pleasure house, him, lonely and bloodthirsty. Both lusting for each other. They live happily for four years together before Klaus daggers him and Allibelle is left alone. A hundred years later and he’s free. What will happen when they find each other again? Will Kol forgive her for being with another? One-shot/ExplicitContent.

v. you’re not the one by bitemytongue / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

After centuries of being together, Kol has grown tired of the life he leads. In a solution to make him happy, Isabella lets him go. With a heart full of pain, she travels back to her homeland to get away from the heartache.e No longer going by Mikealson, Bella Salvatore returns to Mystic Falls to visit her boys. Only to run into the past she wasn’t ready to face. 

vi. a love to kill for by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Kol moves to Seattle after his babysitting of Jeremy Gilbert in Denver. In Seattle he finds more than he was looking for when he comes across Bella Swan. M FOR VIOLENCE. One-Shot

vii. a shadow in the mirror by cuinawen / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Bella Swan finds herself dragged into the middle of things when mysterious murders begin to plague the small town of Forks. But the most obvious danger isn’t always the one you should worry about the most. Romance/Horror, Bella/Kol. *Mature Content* Halloween One-shot contest entry for Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Spook Fest

viii. moonlight and mistletoe by cuinawen / m / 3-4k, one-shot / complete

Twelfth and final story in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… After the Cullens leave Bella finds peace while going out running… and then someone finds her… Rated M just in case. One Shot.

ix. fallen for you by agmdnat / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

After her break-up with Edward, Bella found her soulmate in the form of another vampire, an Original vampire. She also discovered her real parentage that gave her amazing abilities and wings to go with it. M for some language and violence. [Kol,Bella]O/S

x. sanctuaire by buggyfiction / m / 90-95k, multi-chaptered / complete / sequel- pandore

On a class trip to New Orleans, Bella stumbles upon history like she never anticipated. Learning about one’s self is never easy, but discovering new things is always an adventure to true independence. Witch!Kol/Bella pairing.

e l i j a h x b e l l a

i. near to you by bitemytongue / t / 7-8k, one-shot / complete

A month after Edward leaves Bella, Bella is beginning to heal. She meets Elijah and with him she begins to really forget Edward and embrace who she really is. With Elijah she truly begins to love. ONE-SHOT

ii. eternal love by bitemytongue / t / 6-7k, one-shot / complete

Bella lied to everyone at Forks. She wasn’t human, she was a cupid. Most of all, she was the daughter of one of the most feared people on Earth. With less than a year to live she sets out on a trip around the world. Ending in the small town of Mystic Falls. Where she meets HIM. ONE-SHOT

iii. vegas by excentrykemuse / t / 6-7k, one-shot / complete

Alice and Rosalie take Bella to Vegas for her bachelorette. What they didn’t realize was that Bella would meet a certain Original while playing Poker … and would fall in love. Bella/Elijah

iv. an eclipse in time by lorelei candice black / m / 45-50k, multi-chaptered / complete

In New Moon,Bella goes to her grandmother’s in Mystic Falls. The war between Hybrids and Vampires is in full swing and it’s horror. Bonnie sends her back in time when the originals were human to change things. Klaus starts out evil…Will he change? Story COMPLETE

v. mystically charmed to fall by lorelei candice black / t / 110-120k, muti-chaptered / complete

Bella learns that she’s a witch after Edward leaves her. She goes to Mystic Falls to learn more with her grandmother. Set in New moon and at the end of season 1 of TVD. Evil Alice. Bella’s the Charmed kind of witch. Review:-) NOW COMPLETE

vi. a love for nature by bitemytongue / t / 7-8k, one-shot / complete

Bella has found her safe haven in New Orleans. With the help of Marcel she’s able to live a normal life, or as normal as it gets for her. She quickly meets the Mikaelsons, and with her love for children helps them with their new member Hope. This friendship will hopefully lead to love.

vii. the waltz by cuinawen / k+ / 1-2k, one-shot / complete

Second in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… A brief encounter at a Mikaelson party in New Orleans… One Shot.

viii. where are you now by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Bella had come to her senses, letting go of the love of her life was the worst mistake she had ever made. In an effort to find him, she leaves Edward and Forks behind. Only the hunt for her love gets postponed after she has an accident landing her in New Orleans. ONE-SHOT

j e r e m y x b e l l a

i. hunting by numbers by cuinawen / t / 2-3k, one-shot / complete

Ninth in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Jeremy meets a girl at Whitmore College… she’s mysterious, quiet… and she needs his help… One Shot.

d a m o n x b e l l a

i. living on a prayer by bertie bott / t / 7-8k, one-shot / complete

Originally written for Kittyinaz’s July Writing Contest. On his death bed after Tyler’s killing bite, Damon has an out of body experience that leads him to a revelation, finally giving his eternity meaning…

ii. almost lover by bertie bott / t / 5-6k, one-shot / complete

Jasper’s honor demands he takes action. Really, he couldn’t abide sitting by watching his family smother Bella to the point of snuffing out her happiness… And if helping her also helps an old friend, then it’s any easy decision when he takes it upon himself to set her free.

iii. a reality romance by t1gercat / t / 20-25k, multi-chaptered / complete

When bad boy superstar Damon Salvatore is forced to have his own reality show to up his album sells he has to have a roommate. Who better than shy girl Bella Swan? Can the two live in peace or will their secrets tear them apart?

iv. the shortcut home by kittyinaz / m / 8-9k, one-shot / complete

A meeting one night in a dusty town changes everything. Now a man becomes a father, a woman becomes a daughter to someone who deserves her, and a love is started. Read what would happen if Twilight had started differently. 

v. this left feels right by bertie bott / m / 15-20k, three-shot / complete

Sometimes life throws you a curve ball right when you need it most. Damon is asked to visit an old friend by someone he can’t say no to. When he gets to Forks, though, it’s not a family of vampires he finds waiting for him, but an angry girl who just might give his life the new direction he’s been seeking…

f i n n x b e l l a

i. all paths lead home by thedarkestfallingstar / m / 1-2k, one-shot / complete

She had given up hope of ever seeing her love again, she should have known that the fates wouldn’t be so cruel.

ii. thaw by thedarkestfallingstar / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

It was cold, the wind and rain seemed to seep to her very bones. Yet, she did not care. She was numb anyway, her heart frozen beyond repair.

iii. speechless by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Life had been hard for Bella Swan after the departure of Edward Cullen, but the rescue of a new friend changes things. Attempting to control her power, and trying to grow accustomed to her new disability Bella Swan starts a new life, and hopefully finds new love. M for Violence

h e n r i k x b e l l a

i. connected by the soul by bitemytongue / m / 120-130k, multi-chaptered / complete

With a forgetful mother and a father several states away Bella has always been on her own. That is until her eleventh birthday when she encounters her soul mate. The only problem, he’s a spirit trapped on the other side. Seventeen and moving to Forks with her father, Bella is closer to being with her soul mate,there’s always something fishy lurking around the corner. M for Violence

ii. renegade by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete / sequel- run away with me

Being stuck on the Other-side is worst than anyone could ever imagine. Being forced to watch as his family unravels before him, Henrik changes from the lovable boy he was human, to a cold and hating ghost. Meeting Bella Swan only fuels his anger for all living beings.

k a i x b e l l a

i. bring you back by meekobb / m / 5-6k, one-shot / complete

When Bella finds herself immersed deeper in the supernatural world, without any cooperation, it drives her to find help from an unlikely ally. Her loyalty to the only one who shows her any concern changes her in ways no one anticipates. Cover art by Bertie Bott.

s l a t e r x b e l l a

i. hacker’s code by bitemytongue / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Being a Hacker is who she is, it’s all she has left anymore. That is until Bella comes across a certain Mikaelson who uses her skill to track down his brother. Working for a Mikaelson leads her to find her equal and a true friend.

t h i e r r y x b e l l a

i. holding onto you by bitemytongue / m / 9-10k, one-shot / complete

Bella had never been without her brother for long, but she was beginning to feel the pain of his loss. She needed to find someone who could help be the family that she needed, but being rejected by her older brother was the last straw. Bella heads to the one place that reminded her most of family, only to meet someone important.

t e e n  w o l f

s t i l e s x b e l l a

i. keep me warm by bitemytongue / m / 9-10k, one-shot / complete

Bella meets a boy her age who is being ignored by all his friends, and being the new kid in town means she has no one to talk to. It makes for the beginning of a beautiful friendship. One that involves, werewolves, vampires, magic, and falling in love.

i s s a c x b e l l a

i. last of the true believers by bitemytongue / t / 9-10k, one-shot / complete

Bella’s life was a bad 90’s high school movie, that is until her father takers her on a vacation around the world. Somewhere between exploring and rediscovering herself she gets a new best friend who might just also happen to be her bonded. But that doesn’t mean that have to date… not yet anyway.

j a c k s o n x b e l l a

i. give me something by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Bella needs a fresh start, one away from vampires and the overbearing weight of grief she had. She moves to Beacon Hills with her older cousin Derek, and his new found pack. She wants friends that are her own, and to be seen as just a girl and not part angel, she gets more than she ever wanted when she meets the cocky blonde haired werewolf.

h a r r y  p o t t e r

s e v e r u s x b e l l a

i. dark eyes by metallicangel28 / m / 10-15k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella was a witch. A dyed in the wool, wand waving, potion brewing, broom riding witch. Not that she rode brooms. She was also Hermione’s elder cousin. After finding a dying Severus Snape in the boat house, she works her magic to heal and bring him back to life. In more ways than just physically. (Timeline altered to make Bella older than Hermione but Twilight story remains as is.)

o n c e  u p o n  a  t i m e

p a n x b e l l a

i. flying away, back to neverland by lorelei candice black / k+ / 8-9k, one-shot / complete

Bella met Peter Pan when she was 8. She kept on coming to Neverland often at nights and grew very close to Peter Pan and the Lost boys. On her 15th birthday, she decides not to go anymore until she’s ready to stay. When she turns 18, she’s ready but will Edward let her go? One-shot. Review please?

a v e n g e r s

l o k i x b e l l a

i. my true self by desertdarkfire / k+ / >1k, one-shot / complete

She’s heard him all her life, somewhere in the shadows. He’s been waiting for her, waiting for her to awaken. What she thinks is a dream, quickly turns to reality. Who is this man? BellaxLoki AU. Based on a song challenge from a friend.

ii. god gave me you by darkestdarkfire / k / >1k, one-shot / complete

Loki takes two very big steps in his life. One of them involves Bella. What could they be? AU Oneshot fic, BellaxLoki

iii. let the stars unite us by whatarefilms / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Sometimes a mother just has to meddle, and this is one of the times that it’s for the good of the universe. (One shot)

s t e v e x b e l l a

i. a heaven from hell’s despair by steampunkfairytale / t / 65-70k, multi-chaptered / complete

When Charlie Swan and Sue Clearwater were murdered by Renee Dwyer, Bella Swan, reeling from the departure of the Cullens, her father’s murder and desperate to escape her psychopath mother turns to the only family she has left: Her Godfather Tony Stark. Bella/Steve. FINALLY COMPLETE!

x m e n

g a m b i t x b e l l a

i. explosive love by thedarkestfallingstar / m / 6-7k, one-shot / complete

Everyone has someone to complete them, challenge them, protect them, even someone as broken as she.

d o c t o r  w h o

1 1 t h d o c t o r x b e l l a

i. is it really you? by queenvampire / k+ / 1-2k, one-shot / complete

Bella is actually another time lord, Huntress, the doctor’s soul mate. She survived, but the doctor thought she was dead, after an incident involving the tardis and a sabre toothed tiger. She lived among humans for a while, trying to find the doctor. What happens when he is put in hospital by accident, and Carlisle Cullen is treating him? Don’t own it.

p i r a t e s  o f  t h e  c a r i b b e a n

j a c k x b e l l a

i. a caribbean soul by fanpire.x / t / 20-25k, multi-chaptered / complete

After Edward leaves, Bella goes back to her real home in the seventeenth century where her first love awaits; but what happens when seven vampires are transported there as well? *Bella/Jack - during NM, then CotBP*

l a b y r i n t h

j a r e t h x b e l l a

i. twilight in the labyrinth by metallicangel28 / m / 45-50k, multi-chaptered / complete

Bella is Sarah’s cousin, and was sent to live with Sarah’s family when Charlie believes her to be sinking farther into her depression. When Sarah makes her ill-thought out wish, Bella is taken with Toby to the castle beyond the goblin city. What will happen when Bella finds both family and love in the Underground. Set in modern times with Jareth’s 80’s clothes. Rofl Sarah bashing!

c r i m i n a l  m i n d s

s p e n c e r x b e l l a

i. look after you by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Being the child of an infamous BAU agent didn’t mean anything to Bella, she was just happy to have a father. Now, at 22 she finds that she’s happy being in love with the genius Doctor Reid. Only now she hopes that she can be forever happy with him. 

d e r e k x b e l l a

i. no more bad days by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete

Bella was never normal, but luckily for her she met her best friend who was just like her. She had to learn the hard way that life isn’t always going to be filled with happy memories. Her life contained bad memories, anxiety attacks, and some loneliness. That is until she gets a job at the FBI and through strange circumstance finds herself in a relationship with a certain Agent.

a a r o n x b e l l a

i. stolen by agentswan / m / 5-6k, one-shot / complete

Aaron Hotchners wife and son get kidnapped. See how he gets them back and who took them. This is for twilightvixxen. M for a reason!

v a m p i r e  a c a d e m y

a d r i a n x b e l l a

i. smile by jasper’s guardian angel / t / >1k, one-shot / complete

In their darkest days they found each other and learned how to smile again. Vampire Academy/Twilight cross-over one-shot, Adrian/Bella pairing. Takes place after LS and During NM. AU

c o v e n a n t

r e i d x b e l l a

i. finding myself with you by bitemytongue / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Everything changed when Edward left. Bella was left broken, and after hitting rock bottom she leaves Forks to move in with her cousin Tyler. Hopefully, Ipswich will be exactly what she needs to find herself.

t y l e r x b e l l a

i. blue eyes by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Heartbroken Bella moves to be with her cousin. All she wants is a normal life, but she isn’t that lucky. Falling in love with her cousin’s best friend is only the beginning, it’s discovering she’s not who she thought she was that changes everything. All she wants is to be happy, and she realizes all she needs is her soulmate to be happy. M For Violence

ii. all i need is you by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete

After everything, leaving Forks was the best decision Bella had ever made. There was no regrets when she left to attend Harvard. For Tyler going to Harvard meant being with his best friends, only freshman year he meets the love of his existence. It’s a real shame his shyness has been holding him back from making a move. Can a math class change things? M for minor violence and such

c a l e b x b e l l a

i. better with you by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

For one it was a lonely life. A life full of sorrow and pain and an overwhelming hate for being an immortal. For the other immortality was a new beginning. A beautiful chance to live a life without sorrow and pain. Coming together they find they’re just perfect for each other, only it takes them a bit of time to realize it.

p o g u e x b e l l a

i. say you love me by bitemytongue / t / 8-9k, one-shot / complete

They met in college, two broken hearts coming together to put the pieces back together. Only after two years and a visit to Ipswich do they begin to realize, that maybe they’re meant to be more than friends. ONE-SHOT

z  n a t i o n

1 0 k x b e l l a

i. no longer alone by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete

Bella Swan didn’t experience the normal zombie apocalypse. She was kidnapped just before it began, so her time was spent with vampires instead of zombie. Escaping she found her way to a small group of survivors on a mission. Keeping her secrets Bella tags along with the group only to fall in love with their quietest member. It’s strange to find love in the apocalypse M for Violence

t r u e  b l o o d

g o d r i c x b e l l a

i. sweet compliance by cuinawen / t / 1-2k, one-shot / complete

Sixth in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Godric isn’t the only one imprisoned by the FotS… they use an innocent human girl to force him to comply… One Shot.

ii. the rescue by velez / m / 3-4k, one-shot / complete

“I Do” vs. “I Do” What is your forever like? Bella Swan is about to say “I Do” but, to the wrong man. Her rescuer is an immortal 2000-year-old vampire who will go to any length to save her. Even if they have not seen each other for some time.

iii. you loved me back to life by velez / m / 3-4k, one-shot / complete

From comatose to two thousand years. Godric and Bella learn to live, love and care for each other during the storm called life.

e r i c x b e l l a

i. an unexpected claim by cuinawen / m / 1-2k, one-shot / complete

First in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Bella goes to Fangtasia with her cousin Sookie and the vampire Bill, and finds the experience exasperating, until she meets a certain Viking. Rated M just in case. One Shot.

a l c i d e x b e l l a

i. taming the wolf by jinx dodson / m / 120-130k, multi-chaptered / complete

“Get on.” He half growls with a slight smile. “You said it’d be as if you never existed…” He turns to her. “What’d you say baby?” She shakes her head as he looks upon her strangely. “Nevermind baby let’s go.” What happens when he doesn’t stop and Bella finds herself in Shreveport, La? With a wolf that has claims to her. (A bit of a dominating Alcide.) Read and Review. RATED Mature

[greymuse]

Witchy QnA

1. Are you solitary or in a coven?

Solitary!

2. Do you consider yourself Wiccan, Pagan, witch, or other?

Witch, or Enchantress if I wanna sound fancy

3. What is your zodiac sign?

Leo sun, Aquarius moon, Leo rising

4. Do you have a Patron God/dess?

Nope

5. Do you work with a Pantheon?

Nope

6. Do you use tarot, palmistry, or any other kind of divination?

Tarot sometimes

7. What are some of your favorite herbs to use in your practice? (if any)

Im just starting to get into more physical items. I was raised to do most things mentally.

8. How would you define your craft?

Im not sure? Green but a lil eclectic

9. Do you curse? If not, do you accept others who do?

I dont think of it as cursing. More so protection from certain people.

10. How long have you been practicing?

I found out about what I was already doing as being Witchcraft a couple months ago. But Ive been using Tarot, using kitchen Witch spells, as “prayers” as spells since I can remember

11. Do you currently or have you ever had any familiars?

Nope. I hope to have one soon though

12. Do you believe in Karma or
Reincarnation?

Absolutely believe in karma. Reincarnation, possibly. Its definitely something I think about

13. Do you have a magical name?

Nope.

14. Are you “out of the broom closet”?

My whole moms side practices casually, so I mean I guess? But I havent referred to  myself as a Witch or something like that.

15. What was the last spell you performed?

I enchanted a ring I got. Also, a money spell that worked but uhh its definitely showing me that I need to work harder.

16. Would you consider yourself knowledgeable?

Im pretty decent. Most of what I look up is common knowledge to me

17. Do you write your own spells?

I havent yet, but I also dont do many spells verbally. I more so visually manifest

18. Do you have a book of shadows? If so, how is it written and/or set up?

I do, Its just a plain lil notebook, I have just some basic reference sheet type things in it.

19. Do you worship nature?

Absolutely

20. What is your favorite gemstone?

rose quartz. or tigers eye

21. Do you use feathers, claws, fur, pelt, skeletons/bones, or any other animal body part for magical work?

I dont particularly enjoy using animal/ human materials. I use natural things, like dirt and water.

  22. Do you have an altar?

Not so much a physical Altar, but my bed is definitely my safe space and I can clear my mind here the easiest.

23. What is your preferred element?

Water, but fire always make me wide eyed and curious. definitely curious. but its destructive potential scares me.

24. Do you consider yourself an Alchemist?

Not art all haha

25. Are you any other type of magical practitioner besides a witch?

Im not sure!

26. What got you interested in witchcraft?

realizing that I had been practicing for my whole life and I hadnt known before

27. Have you ever performed a spell or ritual with the company of anyone who was not a witch?

yeah, with my mom and her mom. I just didnt know at the time. We do protection spells often.

28. Have you ever used ouija?

yup! with my mom and her mom. Its just a family thing we do every time we all get together. I grew up thinking it was completely normal.

29. Do you consider yourself a psychic?

My mom says I used to be. I used to dream about natural disasters before they happened as a kid. I dont think im too good anymore. just empathetic.

30. Do you have a spirit guide? If so, what is it?

I dont think I do. If anything, I do feel a feminine energy? dark (like a shadow, not negative) and watery is the best way I can describe it. But its not a human  entity. Just energy.

31. What is something you wish someone had told you when you first started?

That not everyone believes what you do. And its totally okay! Just maybe dont loudly announce your Ouija board antics with your science teacher in middle school.

32. Do you celebrate the Sabbats? If so which one is your favorite?

I havent before, but im going to try to this year

33. Would you ever teach witchcraft to your children?

Absolutely. I want my son to grow up the same way I did around magick. Itll be normal for him.

34. Do you meditate?

Sometimes! its definitely something im trying to do more often.

35. What is your favorite season?

Fall and Spring! Theres so much change

36. What is your favorite type of magick to preform?

Im not sure yet! Ive only just started branching out and actually considering what ive been doing all my life as magick.

37. How do you incorporate your spirituality into your daily life?

Daily affirmations/ protection spells, I manifest me and my sons happiness and safety every day.

38. What is your favorite witchy movie?

I dont think Ive seen any haha

39. What is your favorite witchy book, both fiction and non-fiction. Why?

The Darkest Powers books by Kelly Armstrong. More supernatural (vampires, werewolves, stuff like that) but I loved it growing up.

40. What is the first spell you ever preformed? Successful or not.

Knowingly, a protection spell from someone who had hurt me

41. What’s the craziest witchcraft-related thing that’s happened to you?

Im not sure! I can see auras if i really focus and can tune into someone, so maybe when i saw a family member with a pure black aura? That was freaky

42. What is your favourite type of candle to use?

I dont use candles! Bonfires or fires in fireplaces usually, to burn a paper if needed. Again, I dont  trust myself with fire very much.

43. What is your favorite witchy tool?

My crystals and my tarot. They all have vibrations. Everything does but especially those, because im so connected to them

44. Do you or have you ever made your own witchy tools?

I want to!  Havent yet

45. Have you ever worked with any magical creatures such as the fea or spirits?

Spirits, yes. I can call on family that Ive known in person for protection. Been doing that as long as i can remember

46. Do you practice color magic?

I used to! i dont really anymore. 

47. Do you or have you ever had a witchy teacher or mentor of any kind?

My mom, aunt, and grandma! 

48. What is your preferred way of shopping for witchcraft supplies?

Dollar store, thrift store, antique stores (though im always hesitant to use something that belonged to someone else. If there isnt a close emotional attachment, there wont be any noticeable vibrations.

49. Do you believe in predestination or fate?

I think theres a general way that things can happen. More like a decide your fate book. There are multiple options, it just depends on what you choose.

50. What do you do to reconnect when you are feeling out of touch with your practice?

Meditate, or go to the lake.

51. Have you ever had any supernatural experiences?

ohhhh boy. I got stories.

52. What is your biggest witchy pet peeve?

People thinking theyre better bc they have a crap ton of materials, thinking im less than because I visualize easier than with material items.

53. Do you like incense? If so what’s your favorite scent?

I do, I just cant very often. I have a child and very smell sensitive people livingg with me

54. Do you keep a dream journal of any kind?

I rarely ever remember a dream, so no

55. What has been your biggest witchcraft disaster?

Im not sure ive had one yet

56. What has been your biggest witchcraft success?

I havent seen who i dont want to see since protecting myself

57. What in your practice do you do that you may feel silly or embarrassed about?

 Everything, haha. I think thats why I enjoy visualizing instead of rituals or verbal stuff.

58. Do you believe that you can be an atheist, Christian, Muslim or some other faith and still be a witch too?

Absolutely!

59. Do you ever feel insecure, unsure or even scared of spell work?

yes, I feel like it //can be// kinda like a genie in a bottle type thing. Itll work, but not without a price.

60. Do you ever hold yourself to a standard in your witchcraft that you feel you may never obtain?

Nope

61. What is something witch related that you want right now?

A cauldron to mix and burn things in haha

62. What is your rune of choice?

I dont know yet! Runes are something Im looking into

63. What is your tarot card of choice?

My birth card, the Tower.

64. Do you use essential oils? If so what is your favorite?

I love lemon and eucalyptus 

65. Have you ever taken any kind of witchcraft or pagan courses?

nope!

66. Do you wear pagan jewelry in public?

Nope

67. Have you ever been discriminated against because of your faith or being a witch?

No one that would feel that way knows anything about it

68. Do you read or subscribe to any pagan magazines?

nope

69. Do you think it’s important to know the history of paganism and witchcraft?

Yes. Its like knowing world history and us history, We need to learn from the past.

70. What are your favorite things about being a witch?

I feel powerful, and connected and accepted by nature.

71. What are your least favorite things about being a witch?

having to tiptoe around things around certain people

72. Do you listen to any pagan music? If so who is your favorite singer/band?

Nope! ill have to look into it

73. Do you celebrate the Esbbats? If so, how?

I havent fully figured out what i want to do for the moon cycles yet, but I definitely want to. the moon and water are so closely related

74. Do you ever work skyclad?

No, but i mean.. maybe one day?

75. Do you think witchcraft has improved your life? If so, how?

I feel like i have more control of how im able to use my emotions and feelings

76. Where do you draw inspiration from for your practice?

The energy i talked about before.. It gets more intense and stronger sometimes, and i know i need to put more time and effort into my practice

77. Do you believe in ‘fantasy’ creatures? (Unicorns, fairies, elves, gnomes, ghosts, etc)

no, but i do believe in energy. not ghosts per say but definitely energy

78. What’s your favorite sigil/symbol?

I try to make most of them myself. I have one for protection while driving that i use for me and my boyfriend a lot. And one for the safety of my son.

79. Do you use blood magick in your practice? Why or why not?

Not as of right now. I did bleed onto my tarot cards on accident though..

80. Could you ever be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t support your practice?

Theres a difference  between “doesnt understand and doesnt care to” and “fully doest support and refuses to let you practice safely”. I dont mind the first, but wouldnt stay with the second.

81. In what area or subject would you most like your craft to grow?

Reading auras, and tarot. Also just connecting with nature more

82. What’s your favorite candle scent? Do you use it in your practice?

I love fall scents! but no, i dont really use candles

83. Do you have a pre-ritual ritual? (I.e. Something you do before rituals to prepare yourself for them). If so what is it?

Meditate and protect

84. What real life witch most inspires your practice?

My mom honestly lmao. i dont think she views herself as a full witch though.And my aunt

85. What is your favorite method of communicating with deity?

I dont worship dieties. But i like to just be in natural and connect emotionally, nonverbally to this energy Im somehow connected with.

86. How do you like to organize all your witchy items and ingredients?

In this lil wooden box my mom gave me for my birthday to hold the tarot cards my grandma gave me haha.

87. Do you have any witches in your family that you know of?

my mom. aunt, and grandma. I know my grandpas grandma was a voodoo witch too.

  88. How have you created your path? What is unique about it?

I havent seen much about nonverbal, mostly mental witchcraft. So i guess  thats one unique thing.

89. Do you feel you have any natural gifts or affinities (premonitions, hearing spirits, etc.) that led you toward the craft? If so what are they?

A couple things. Feeling vibrations, the connection to nature, auras, growing up surrounded by it.

90. Do you believe you can initiate yourself or do you have to be initiated by another witch or coven?

I believe you can initiate yourself. I dont feel the need for someone elses validation is i know my connection with nature is real

91. When you first started out in your path what was the first thing or things you bought?

crystals, lmao

92. What is the most spiritual or magickal place you’ve been?

The southern oregon coast. honestly everywhere in oregon feels so alive and vibrating so heavily with energy. The water and the lush greenery is perfection.

93. What’s one piece of advice you’d give someone who is searching for their matron and patron deities?

I have no idea, I dont follow a deity

94. What techniques do you use to ‘get in the zone’ for meditation?

quiet, listen to music i like and that help calm me, slightly cool, a breeze is good. the sound of real water flowing from a lake or ocean. recordings of water dont help me. sometimes white noise if theres too much noise

95. Did visualization come easily to you or did you have to practice at it?

visualization is the easiest thing for me. ive always daydreamed so heavily that itll be like im dreaming with my eyes totally open and tracking. 

  96. Do you prefer day or night? Why?

early mornings, right as the sun is coming up.

97. What do you think is the best time and place to do spell work?

I like doing spell work before bed, when the moon is bright enough to light up what im doing

98. How did you feel when you cast your first circle? Did you stumble or did it go smoothly?

I dont know if it counts as casting a circle? but i visualize a swirling white ball of energy, starting out like a strawberry size in my hands, and every time i breath in, it gets bigger. Its a protection circle. i learned to do it at like?? 3 years old?

99. Do you believe witchcraft gets easier with time and practice?

Yup!

100. Do you believe in many gods or one God with many faces?

If i had to guess, id say multiple gods/ goddesses. one entity shouldnt have that much power imo.

101. Do you eat meat, eggs and dairy?

Ive been trying to go vegetarian, and i eat minimal eggs and dairy.

102. What is your favorite color and why?

dark, smokey colors. grey, black, dark muted purples, navy, smoky pink.

103. What is the one question you get asked most by non-practitioners or non-pagans? How do you usually respond?

I dont have many people im even slightly into that stuff, let alone a witch. So usually just “how do i cleanse my house? i think its haunted” type stuff

104. Which of your five senses would you say is your strongest?

Feel, haha, physically and emotionally.

105. What is a pagan or witchcraft rule that you preach but don’t practice?

Always properly cleanse new materials, haha

[thejazzvoid]

Oh and for the ask meme, all of them

...Oh dear. Well, anyway, here they are, I suppose?

I (Where did you hide the body?): In plain sight.

II (Favorite rock?): Chalcedony, most likely, partially because hhh cool rock, partially because of Elizabeth Bear’s story “Tideline,” and partially because the name just sounds cool.

III (Worst dream you ever had?): The first one I could think of was one in which I was trying to hide from something or other and ended up trapped in my backyard; also spiders had begun emerging from my hands.

IV (Answer this with a lyric from the first song that comes to your mind.): I want a love that falls as fast as a body from a balcony; I want a kiss like my heart is hitting the ground (from “Townie” by Mitski).

V (Does blood make you uncomfortable?): It honestly depends on the context, but not just seeing it.

VI (Even numbers or odd numbers?): Odd numbers, I’d have to say.

VII (Something you hate that you love?): Homestuck.

VIII (The first initial of someone you hate?): B.

IX (Make up an acrostic for the word “exsanguinate.”): (Based on the TMA episode “Blood Bag” because it seemed fitting and I didn’t have any other ideas)

Entomology led me here, to my likely e-

Xit from this room within the

Stomachs of thousands of mosquitoes,

And

Nothing seems to

Go right; go right—it’s the fastest way out, and

Underneath ceiling panels,

I am bled dry, and

No one else is

Around;

They’re already out there, and

Entomology led me here.

X (Do you enjoy corndogs?): Not really?

XI (Favorite movie from the year 2005?): I suppose I’d have to choose “Harry Potter & The Goblet of Fire.”

XII (Least favorite music genre?): Most modern country music.

XIII (Have any terrible restaurant experiences?) Yes, if by “terrible restaurant experiences,” you mean “the result of other unrelated turmoil unfolding within the confines of a restaurant.”

XIV (Three things that you would never want to come near you?):

i) The sun, or any other star, for that matter.

ii) The remaining smallpox viruses still in containment.

iii) The supermassive black hole at the center of our galaxy.

XV (What is the worst way for you to die? [In your opinion]): Buckle up, kids, this is going to get detailed. So, let’s say that I’ve uncovered something significant that could right some wrongs and provide information that a lot of people need.

Before I can release my findings, though, or prepare for my likely neutralization, I’m abducted and recognize some of my captors as acquaintances or loved ones. After days of coercion, I make up information on the whereabouts of several important figures and/or my friends. My abductors know that none of this is true, and they tell me.

I am violated repeatedly, shot, then set alight. Somehow, my death is covered up or framed as suicide. None of my discoveries ever reach their intended audience.

XVI (Any unusual habits?): I tend to flap my hands when I’m excited or stressed?

XVII (One emoji that you probably have never used?): 📟; I’m not quite sure what it’s meant to be.

XVIII (Write a three-sentence horror story about a Gatorade bottle.): My mother told me never to leave food in my tent while camping. Tonight, however, I kept a bottle of Gatorade half-closed next to my sleeping bag. I woke to a decaying hand shredding the side of my tent and a long, hollow-eyed face softly groaning above my own.

XIX (Do you know what Old Bay is?): Do you?

XX (Can you dance?): I’m a fairly good dancer.

XXI (What first comes to mind when you see rope?): The figure-eight follow-through knot, for some reason.

XXII (Make an obscure reference.): What happened in Piedmont will hopefully stay in Piedmont or eventually mutate into a non-virulent form.

XXIII (What is your favorite color for a balloon?): Yellow or teal, most likely.

XXIV (If you were to ever go to court, would you more likely be guilty or innocent?): Depends on the crime, my guy.

XXV (Are you hungry?): No.

XXVI (Do you have an unlucky number?): 7.

XXVII (What does “JMD” stand for?): The Oxford Dictionary says it’s “Jamaican Dollars.”

XXVIII (Random inside joke?): This vanity’s real picturesque.

XXIX (What sends chills up your spine?): Whenever I stand in this one spot outside my house, I just kind of reflexively shudder for some reason.

XXX (How many questions are currently in your inbox?): 2.

XXXI (Someone real who scares you?): This might not technically be someone, but the fact that Disney has the influence that it has?

XXXII (Run or hide?): Hiding, most likely, because you can hide indefinitely, with any luck.

XXXIII (Who is the last person who mad you angry?): Jeff Bezos.

XXXIV (What’s going on in your head?): ...I don’t know; I just work here.

XXXV (One little thing that makes you smile?): Moss.

XXXVI (Are you a decisive person?): Not really, but I’m working on it.

XXXVII (Would people describe you as a paranoid person?): A year ago, definitely, but not so much now.

XXXVIII (What store would you be the least likely to be found in?): I have been many places, but I’ve never once seen a Sam’s Club, no matter how many signs I see for them, and I have no real interest in seeking one out.

XXXIX (Do you like hats? If so, what’s your favorite type?): Yes; I don’t know what my favorite type of hat would be, but my favorite hat is this massive orange sun-hat that makes me feel like some kind of reclusive artist/former socialite.

XL (Bowties or ties?): Ties.

XLI (Who?): The friends we made along the way.

XLII (What?): Oh, you know,,, ;)

XLIII (Where?): The Taco Bell parking lot.

XLIV (When?): The witching hour.

XLV (Why?): For love and for spite.

XLVI (How?): Duct tape and a fire within.

XLVII (Do you collect anything?): Tiny containers.

XLVIII (What time is it?): As I type this, 12:04 p.m.

XLIX (Favorite mode of transportation?): Bus, walking, or “Castle in The Sky”-type airship.

L (Would you ever kill someone to save someone else?): It depends.

LI (Make a joke.): Contrary to popular belief, magic actually does abide by mathematical principles—hexponents.

LII (.esrever ni gnihtemos etirW): Rats live on no evil star.

LIII (Would your dash be considered SFW?): Yes, for the most part.

LIV (Do you like to cuddle?): Heck yeah, my dude.

LV (What makes you angry?): Late-stage capitalism and the texture of Jell-O.

LVI (How many voices are in your head?): I don’t think in auditory words, exactly; it’s more a Strange Cloud Of Ideas and at least one song playing the background.

LVII (Do you consider yourself mentally stable?): Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ve been doing better than I have been in a while, but it’s still some kind of time.

LVIII (Are you easily offended?): If the comment or whatever it is is directed at me exclusively, no, but if it’s meant to target other people as well, then I suppose so.

LIX (What’s wrong with taking the backstreets?): You’ll never know if you don’t go.

LX (Any questions you want people to ask you?): Be needlessly ominous. Ask me to write short horror stories. Confess your feelings for me. That kind of stuff.

[tobesoeros]

part 1 - 5 & 17!

17. Are you more of a sunrise or sunset watcher?

sunrise. i go on camping trips with my frat and i get up really early to always see the sunrise on the lake :) 

you can’t make read mores in asks rip

PART 1. Ask me about myself…

1. Do you like the way you look?

yeah most of the time. i know i could look better if i put in more effort into working out and stuff, but overall yeah. im not completely mad. 

2. Have you ever cut your hair yourself?

yeah when i was little my bangs were a shit show lkjdads

3. What’s your Instagram @?

mutuals can follow at @xsabrinalynn :)

4. Favorite console to play video games on?

i don’t play a lot of video games now, but i really loved my nintendo ds when i had one.

5. Do you collect anything?

all my tickets from flights, concerts, movies, etc.!! 

6. Have you ever smoked a cigarette?

nope!

7. Are you a fan of bread and butter?

yes!!!!! outback bread is my fave 

8. Does everything happen for a reason?

yeah. 

9. What’s the most embarrassing thing that happened to you?

oh god. i accidentally texted my dad that i wanted to f*ck harry styles. 

10. Have you ever almost died?

yeah. i fell off some stairs and went backwards, falling half way down the long staircase, but i grabbed onto the railing somehow. i know if i didn’t try to grab onto something i probably would’ve broken my neck. 

11. Go-to ice cream order?

anything strawberry!! or taro! 

12. Do you like your room?

yes!! i like my college and home now, we just redid my home room :’)

13. What do you like to do when you’re feeling stressed?

do nothing. sleep. 

14. Who’s your best friend?

idk honestly. 

15. Favorite animal?

cats! 

16. Do you like to read?

yes!! 

17. Are you an extrovert or introvert?

ambivert!

18. Biggest regret?

not confronting people in my past sooner. would’ve saved me my mental health. 

19. Are you a fan of theme parks?

yes!! california adventure was the best! 

20. Have you crossed anything off your bucket list in the past 2 months?

i don’t have a list???? but im doing everything i wanted to do this summer. 

PART 2. Ask me if I’m a believer…

1. Do you believe in aliens?

yeah! 

2. Do you believe the butterfly effect is real?

uhhh idk 

3. Do you think love at first sight is legit?

yeah i think so. 

4. Do you think we go to heaven or hell when we die?

idk im not religious so idk 

5. Do you believe in karma?

yeah to some extent

6. Do you believe in witches and/or magic?

no

7. Do you think ghosts are real?

yeah! 

8. Do you believe in anything mythical/supernatural? (Bigfoot, Mermaids, Vampires, etc.)

yes and no, like i want them to be real but i don’t think they are. 

9. Do you believe in a God?

no

PART 3. Ask me about relationships & love…

1. Are you in love with anyone at the moment?

no

2. Do you want to eventually get married?

idk if it’s really the right person

3. Have you ever broke a friend’s trust?

yeah

4. What was your first kiss like?

haven’t had it

5. If a friend called you to help hide a body, would you help or turn them in?

god idk i don’t think i would do anything?

6. Have you ever had a crush on someone that, now as you look back, is completely embarrassing?

oh god yes 

7. Explain your dream date.

a theme park. 

8. How would you react if you had a secret admirer?

try to figure out who they are (ive had one and knew who it was lol)

9. You’re having dinner with your s/o, are you guys eating at a restaurant or having a home cooked meal?

restaurant unless they know how to cook

10. Talk about one of your favorite memories you share with a friend.

i got close with one my friends at a party and it was really nice cause we clicked immediately we’re really great friends now! 

11. Have you ever secretly taken something from a friend and not given it back?

i don’t think so?

12. How would you react if a friend started dating your ex?

haven’t had ex’s so

13. Do you think any of your friends talk about you behind your back?

yeah

14. Where would you want to have your honeymoon?

santorini

15. Do you believe in sex before marriage?

yeah why no 

16. Are you currently single?

yeah

17. Have you ever broken up with someone?

no 

18. Have you ever cried over a break-up with a friend?

no 

19. If you were in an emergency, which friend would you call first?

my dad 

PART 4. Ask me about my favorite things!

1. Favorite feel-good movie?

to all the boys ive loved before

2. Favorite song from before 2005?

hey ya! - outkast

3. ALL-TIME favorite album?

god. probably i like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it - the 1975 

4. Favorite actress?

brie larson

5. Top 3 favorite colors?

pink, blue, purple

6. Favorite book genre?

young adult

7. Favorite poem?

ithaka by c.p. cavafy

8. Favorite actor?

tom holland dakjsdk obvs

9. Favorite type of food?

italian!

10. Favorite pair of shoes you own?

my white leather converse 

11. Favorite song right now?

senorita - shawn mendes, camila cabello

12. Favorite show you’ve ever watched?

bates motel 

13. Favorite show as of right now?

good trouble! 

14. Favorite quote?

“we are the choices we make. and have to make. we aren't anything else.” - chaos walking  

15. Favorite thing to do when you’re bored?

tumblr, watch a movie or sleep

16. Favorite food?

baked ziti or arroz imperial 

17. Favorite sea animal?

dolphins! 

18. Favorite perfume/cologne/body spray?

elizabeth james nirvana white 

19. Favorite drink to order at a coffee shop?

chai tea latte 

20. Favorite person you know?

my dad 

21. Favorite blog(s) here on Tumblr?

you!! @tomhollandcouk @parkerpete @parkerleeds @zendhaya @officialtessaholland @tmholland​ @akapeterparker​

22. Favorite Youtuber?

mikey murphy 

23. Favorite place to shop?

f21

24. Favorite book?

chaos walking series 

25. Favorite musician?

the 1975!

26. Favorite city you’ve been to?

chicago!

27. Favorite sport?

american football

28. Favorite outfit you own?

my overalls with a simple t-shirt and my converse

29. Favorite app to use?

instagram

30. Favorite flower?

sunflower

PART 5. Ask me Would You Rather…

1. Eat a slug OR Eat a cockroach?

cockroach

2. Not take a shower for a week OR Not brush your teeth for a week?

teeth? gum right??

3. Cuss out your boss OR Tell your mom she looks fat?

tell my mom she looks fat cause she asks me this anyways 

4. Fart in front of your crush (and they know it’s you) OR Accidentally sneeze in your celebrity crush’s face?

sneeze dkaskd

5. Jump off a cliff into the ocean OR Go skydiving and jump out of a plane?

skydiving

6. Be the girl who was known for eating her tampon OR Have everyone in your life legitimately hate you?

the tampon i think rip 

7. Not be able to own anything that costs more than $20 OR Only be able to own things that cost $100 or more?

$100 more 

8. Shit your pants on nation television OR Shit your pants at a job interview?

job interview shit happens lmao 

9. Be famous while you’re alive but forgotten when you die OR Be unknown while you’re alive but famous after you die?

famous after i die

10. Go to jail for 5 years for something you didn’t do OR Get away with a horrible crime and live with guilt & fear?

jail for 5 years 

[padfootagain]

I can't believe I reached 3k followers!!! Thank you all so much!! When I started this blog, I hoped to reach 100 followers one day, and now here we are!

So to thank you all and mark the date, I'm making a little event! The theme is simple : movies!

What is it all about?

Under the cut are a list of prompts and scenes from different movies. You can choose between two different things that you would like me to write:

-        You can choose between 1 and 5 prompts along with a character and I will write a one-shot based on these prompts for the character you have chosen

-        You can choose one scene in the list and a character, and I will re-write that scene for the character you have chosen

A few rules to follow if you want to send a request.

-        If you request for the prompts :

- You can request up to 5 prompts, not more

- You can add a few details that you would like to be featured in your request if you have precise ideas

 -        If you request a scene :

- I will write a one-shot that is inspired by that scene, not the exact same scene (obviously, otherwise, where is the fun?). The idea is to get the same spirit and some references, or the same situation, but not a simple copy.

- These scenes will require me to turn AU!, so don't be surprised.

- You can request only one scene, so choose wisely ;)

- I will most likely 'erase'  the characters who were in the original scenes, so don't be surprised.

 No matter if you request for prompts or for a scene :

- You can request for any character on my masterlist, no matter if I've already written for them or not.

- I have no trouble with anons, if you're a little shy. So don't hesitate to send a request on anon if you feel more comfortable this way.

- Please, send me your request through my askbox and not in a PM. It's much easier for me to manage, and I might forget about your request if you send it to me privately. If you're shy, send an ask on anon.

- Sadly, I will probably not be able to write all the requests that are sent my way. I will write as many as I can, but I'm only human. I'm sorry if I don't get to write your request. But I invite you to send it anyway, because I might write your request! If you don't send it, then you can be sure that I won't though. Again, I'm sorry if I can't write all the requests I receive, but I usually get too many to be able to write them all.

 Requests for this event will be up for one week, which means until January 14!

Considering how well this event works, I may change that date along the way.

Thank you all again and I hope you like this event :D

Prompts :

Every prompt is a movie quote. The movie it comes from is written under the quote in italic

 1. "Was that a joke?"

"What if it was?"

"I don't like jokes!"

"I don't like you!'

Kuch Kuch Hota Hai

 2. "Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking, nerf-herder!"

Star Wars : The Empire Strikes Back

 3. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

 4. "Well… my philosophy is that worrying means you suffer twice."

Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them

 5. "A heart's a heavy burden."

Howl's Moving Castle

 6. "You're far away, where are you?"

"In a world that's disappearing, I'm afraid."

The Sound Of Music

 7. "No, I'm not mad. I… I'm hurt, and disappointed and… and mad."

Funny Face

 8. "I'm always gonna love you."

"I'm always gonna love you too."

La La Land

 9. "I'll just take my ego for a walk…"

An Affair To Remember

 11. "Would you like to stay for dinner?"

"Would you like to stay forever?"

Mulan

 12. "At midnight, I'll turn into a pumpkin and drive away in my glass slipper. And that will be the end of the fairytale."

Roman Holiday

 13. "Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around, he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?"

It's A Wonderful Life

 14. "Whatever crimes I commit against you, remember, I have diplomatic immunity in 46 countries. Including Puerto Rico."

The Princess Diaries : Royal Engagement

 15. "Anything can happen if you let it."

Mary Poppins

 16. "Life is suffering. It is hard. The world is cursed. But still you find reasons to keep on living."

Princess Mononoke

 17. "Everything is possible. Even the impossible."

Mary Poppins Returns

 18. "Love isn't a thinking thing. It's a feeling thing."

Playing It Cool

 19. "That is one big pile of shit."

Jurassic Park

 20. "I love you."

"I know."

Star Wars : The Empire Strikes Back.

 21. "Sadness, anger, hate… we were not allowed to express anything. So no, how do we express love?"

Dear Zindagi

 22. "Carpe Diem. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary."

Dead Poets Society

 23. “Always believe in yourself. Do this and no matter where you are, you will have nothing to fear.”

The Cat Returns

 24. "I'll probably lose my citizenship for that."

Mission Impossible III

 25. "Oh, don't waste my time with flattery."

"Not to seem rude, but I wasn't actually talking to you."

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.

 26. "But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass."

The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers

 27. " I guess we need to register you as a lethal weapon."

Lethal Weapon

 28. "Just because it is, doesn't mean it should be."

Australia

 29. "It does not do well to dwell on dreams and forget to live."

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

 30. "A lot of people are in love… but none can love like me, because they don't have you."

Kal Ho Naa Ho

 31. "Just follow your heart. And keep smiling."

Kiki's delivery service

 32. "That look in your eyes is a pain in my arse, you know that, right?"

Mission Impossible III

 33. "Can we take a flight back to reality, or do we have to change planes in Denver?"

The Santa Clause

 34. "Yippie-Ki-Yay, motherfucker."

Die Hard

 35. "I retire for like five minutes and it all goes to shit."

The Avengers

 36. "Would you like to know the probability of her using it against you? It's high."

"Let's get going."

"It's very high…"

Star Wars : Rogue One

 37. "I'm too old for this."

Lethal Weapon

 38. "Oh yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it."

The Lion King

 39. "Now, think of the happiest things. It's the same as having wings."

Peter Pan

 40. "I'm in love with you."

"So what?"

"So what? So plenty! I love you! You belong to me!"

"No. People don't belong to people."

Breakfast at Tiffany's

 41. "It's called Karma. And it's pronounced 'Ha! '"

Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again

 42. "Whoa, lady, I only speak two languages: English and bad English."

The Fifth Element

 43. "You were my new dream."

Tangled

 44. "Any question?"

"Yeah. Could we get a cappuccino machine in here? Cause I don't know how you call this."

Mission Impossible

 45. "I'm not used to people sticking around when things go bad."

"Welcome home."

Star Wars : Rogue One

 45. "Stop, you'll kill them!"

"That's the idea!"

The Mummy

 46. "Probably best not to tell anyone about this."

"Right, no one. I mean, I'll tell myself sometimes but don't worry, I won't believe it."

Notting Hill

 47. "Once you've met someone, you never really forget them."

Spirited Away

 48. "I hit my head on something."

"Yeah, my head!"

Balto

 49. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Are you okay to drive? A minute ago, you were dead."

"What are you talking about?"

"This is not going to end well."

Mission Impossible : Rogue Nation

 50. "I've got a bad feeling about this…"

Star Wars

 51. "A little consideration, a little thought for others, makes all the difference."

Winnie The Pooh

 52. "If she loves you then she will turn around and look at you... turn around... turn around!"

Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge

 53. "Can I stay for a while?"

"Stay forever."

Notting Hill

 54. "Promise me one thing: don't take me home until I'm drunk - very drunk indeed."

Breakfast at Tiffany's

 55. "This California dew is a little heavier than usual tonight."

"Really? From where I stand the sun is shining all over the place."

Singin' In The Rain

 56. "You need to stop carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders."

Spider-Man: Homecoming

 57. "Who ever said the human race was logical?"

Star Trek IV : The Voyage Home

 58. "Blow up the car."

"Oh, it's such a nice car…"

"And yet, do it."

Mission Impossible III

 59. "Why complicate things that are really quite simple?"

Mary Poppins

 60. "Who are you?"

"Your worst nightmare."

Mulan

 61. "You said 'whoopsidaisies'."

"I don't think so. No one says 'whoopsidaisies', do they? Unless they're…"

"There is no 'unless'. No one has said 'whoopsidaisies' for fifty years and even then it was only little girls with blonde ringlets."

Notting Hill

 62. "I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore."

The Wizard Of Oz

 63. "Are you out of your corn-fed mind?!"

Star Trek : Into Darkness

 64. "You're a good man, with a good heart. And it's hard for a good man to be king."

Black Panther

 65. "It is mine to give to whom I will. Like my heart."

The Lord of the Rings : The Fellowship of the Ring

 66. "There's no place like home…"

The Wizard Of Oz

 67. "I'm with you till the end of the line"

Captain America : First Avenger

 68. "You deserve better than this. You deserve people who value you. You deserve to go somewhere where you can be proud of who you are."

The Shape Of Water

 69. "No matter how many weapons you have, no matter how great your technology might be, the world cannot live without love."

Castle In The Sky

 70. "There is nothing more reassuring than realizing that the world is crazier than you are."

Thor: The Dark World

 71. "I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone."

The Lord of the Rings : The Fellowship of the Ring

 72. "I love her."

"Does she love you?"

" I don't know now. Yesterday, you weren't alive."

"Well, I apologize for not being dead in a ditch."

"I don't think I can accept your apology."

"Is that a joke?"

"Yes, yes, sort of. I'm not... I've never been very good at jokes."

Salmon Fishing In The Yemen

 73. "English, motherfucker, do you speak it?"

Pulp Fiction

 Scenes :

The links to the scenes on youtube are set in the titles of the movies, so it can be easier for you to choose. I'll re-write the scene entirely so you and the character of your choice can live it ;) It can be set either in the universe of the character you have chosen or the universe of the original scene depending on the scene you choose.

 1. Indiana Jones : Raiders Of The Lost Ark

You are so close to finding this lost treasure. Bad for you that you have fallen in a cave filled with deathly traps.

 2. Jurassic Park

You thought you would enjoy a nice weekend discovering an amazing scientific breakthrough. Now, here you are, hiding from a T-Rex and wondering how you got yourself in this situation…

 3. The Shop Around The Corner / You've Got Mail

You have a date with someone tonight, but you don't know who. All you know is that you are to meet in that café. All turns crazy when your date is actually this colleague of yours whom you hate… kinda…

 4. L'Arnacoeur

Your family engaged him/her to seduce you, so you would break your engagement with this guy they hate. Bad luck that for once, he/she falls for you too…

 5. Love Affair / An Affair To Remember / Sleepless In Seattle

It's love at first sight. But perhaps the two of you are getting ahead of yourselves. You give each other a bit of time to think, and set up to meet at the top of the Empire State Building, if in six months, you still feel the same for each other. But will you both be there?

 6. The Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian

The only way to win this war is to earn more time. And a fight one on one with your enemy is the best way you can come up with. But who will survive the fight? Will it be enough?

 7. The Lord Of The Rings : The Fellowship Of The Ring

You are trapped in Moria. A Balrog chasing after you. This looks pretty bad… yep… that's bad…

 8. Roman Holiday

You are a princess in your country, but for one day, you have managed to escape your duties, and you are now roaming through the streets of Roma. A stranger helps you through the streets of the city and you spend a magical day…

 9. The Holiday

You have exchanged your house for the holiday with a woman in England. You expected a quiet week, but that was before you would meet the woman's brother…

 10. The Lake House

Through your mail box, you somehow receive letters from the man who used to live in your house 5 years ago. Through the letters you exchange, you slowly start to develop feelings for each other. Until one day you decide to meet, and set up a date. But he never comes. You realize that he didn't come because he had died during these five years that separated the two of you. But you may have one last chance to save him…

[ask-shakespearehigh]

Q&A post with the Mods!!!!

This is going to be a long one oh boy

How strict is the delineation of creative control vis-a-vis characters/plays between the mods? (@pedanticlecturer)

We generally have the plays split up along lines of “what we know”— we have a list at the very beginning of the blog. Sometimes we’ll draw the others’ characters (mostly me drawing some of Star’s…) but even then the final say on characterization is up to the “main” mod for that play — mod aster

what aster said -- mod star

What is your favorite play? What is your favorite character in terms of how they were written in the source material? (@pedanticlecturer)

I think my favorite play overall is Macbeth, just because I like the vibes (and the fact that I too could kill Macbeth), the fact that you don’t say it’s name in theatres, and the fact that it’s a play I did a full read through and analysis of in class. Favorite character? Puck from Midsummer. — mod aster

uhhhh,, hmm. ive always had a soft spot for midsummer since i saw it with aster esp bc of how fun the costumes were. of the comedies it has the largest potential to be the most visually pleasing bc of the concept of fairies,,,and im gay and dramatic so i love that. id die if i got to costume design for midsummer,,,or be in it,,,yeah. fav character. hmm. probably mercutio?? i recently saw a version of romeo and juliet where mercutio was played by a woman and oh my god it was amazing!!! not to mention mercutio’s portrayal in baz luhrmann's INCREDIBLE version of r n j!!! (I based my mercutio design on him) he just spends the entire time making dick jokes. love that. -- mod star

How do you answer asks so fast? I mean it's great but I'm impressed 😂 (Anon)

Personally, it’s a mix of: notifications on, quick drawing speed, and using the blog to avoid my class work — mod aster

aster is fast and (as you can see from all of my answers) im lazey -- mod star

Are there any elements/characters of the plays you're covering that you would have liked to work into this blog's plot, but couldn't due to the constraints of the setting or the synthetic nature of the blog? (@pedanticlecturer)

I wanted to make everyone gay but unfortunately due to plot constraints we have to have some hets but that wont stop me from making it lgbt as possible. -- mod star

I did want to make The Tempest more of a central play, but it just didn’t translate well. Similarly, other supernatural elements like the witches in Macbeth. This isn’t so much a constraint mentioned, but my own time/energy means that I want to show the Macbeth backstory, in a specific format, but I can’t right now— mod aster

Is there a hierarchy of import when it comes to each play's individualized impact on shakespeare high's general arc? If so, what plays are crucial to the foundation of the story? Which ones did you do mostly for shits and giggles? (@pedanticlecturer)

This is phrased like an ACT question and i might not answer it right so sorry in advance but: mod aster and i only selected a few plays for each of us to do given we dont know all of shakespeare’s works, but we tend to put more emphasis on the the more well known. But it also comes down to 1. How much we have plotted out for each play and 2. What the followers ask about most. Our two most popular are hamlet and macbeth bc people are familiar w those but around march caesar always becomes relevant again. I didnt even have designs for some of the characters until someone asked about them. -- mod star

I would say the same as star— it generally comes down to what people ask about. I will say that the overall plot is sort of separated into “has happened” and “is happening”. Like, the human potion of Midsummer, Julius Caesar, and Macbeth are all in the “aftermath” portion, while Twelfth Night, Hamlet, and Romeo and Juliet, among others, are happening. We’re trying to incorporate as much as we can, and I don’t think any of them were really put in without some thought.— mod aster

What personal significance does shakespeare hold in ur guys' lives? (@pedanticlecturer)

I go to a theater school rn and so ive dealt w shakespeare (although not all of them) it also helps that i was in loves labours lost last year as moth and that i read hamlet and r n j. Theres also a theater in my state that always does One Big Shakespeare per season and they always do them super well!!! My love for shakespeare probably started w seeing midsummer at that theater w mod aster!!! So. Theater kid rights!! -- mod star

To be honest, I got back into Shakespeare Because of the blog. I’ve been friends with some people that got really Pretentious about Shakespeare, and it kinda put me off of it. I did have a book of abridged plays (the plays’ plots written out in prose, basically) that I read as a kid, which is what got me into not only the plots of a lot of the plays, but also the idea of having them illustrated. And, same as star, the theater in state does the One Big Shakespeare— and they tend to do some really cool things with the costumes, setting them in diff time periods. I haven’t been able to see any lately since I’ve moved, but they still slap. — mod aster

🥰😘💙🥰🥰💜💟🥰I 😍💗💚😍😍LOVE🖤🖤 YALL ♥️♥️🧡💛💚💝❣️💕💘💖💗💓💞💝❤️💛💜 okay now i have a question i swear— how long have the two of you been doing art??? and what were your first shakespeare plays??? (@hellaghosts)

Uhh i started drawing when i was like idk 12 and i have the giant boxes of sketchbooks to prove it!!! I moved to digital art at abt 14-15 but mostly stayed traditional until this yr when i got a Neat New Tablet so some of my sketchbooks are sitting abandoned rip. My first shakespeare was either romeo and juliet or midsummer nights dream and i love both of them v much!!! I have a very old piece of art that i did for r n j for my freshman class assignment on it and it hasnt aged well alsdjfjafd circa 2016 i think??? -- mod star

Oh man. I started drawing when I was about 10, but it was Bad. I don’t think I got much into drawing again until I was about 14? Sometime around the end of middle school/beginning of high school. I would say I started getting into drawing as more than doodling/coloring edits sometime around 2015-16? I would draw on my iPad with my finger, then I got a tablet for my computer, and now I pretty much stick to my iPad with an Apple Pencil. My first Shakespeare play was….. uh…… probably Midsummer???? I have No idea. We would go to plays when I was little, so I honestly don’t remember if I saw others before. It may have been Romeo and Juliet— I had that book where it was the original and the “modernized” with the little dog that explained things— which, if you know it makes sense, but if you don’t is probably a bonkers answer. — mod aster

Do you think this blog has like? An overarching thesis (be it b/c intentionally or simply b/c ur own take on the world has bled thru to the point where u believe it’s central to the piece at this point)? (@pedanticlecturer)

Not gonna lie, I had to read that like three times AND dm you to figure out what you were asking from us and all I have is “be gay, respect women, write your own happy endings”. — mod aster

This blog started with an ides of march shitpost and you think we have enough brain energy to write a whole thesis? I projected feelings of found family onto my half of the blog but idk if that counts. Be gay do crime 420 69 -- mod star

What’s the nature/rough dynamic of ur relationship? How do y’all know each other? (@pedanticlecturer)

Met mod aster when i was like 4 and even tho we didnt live close we became like, best friends although the Best part didnt start until we were like 13-ish and eventually we talked like non stop (about anime and homestuck. Yknow. 13 year old kid things) and we didnt see each other a lot bc of Distance and now its even worse bc aster is in colleg.,e but we consider each other siblings regardless of family bc we’re adopted into our own respective families so that bled over into our friendship and it would feel weird calling him anything other than my brother now. We’ve seen each other at our best and worst and if you really want a good insight on what we’re like as siblings watch griffin and justin mcelroy’s overview video of catlateral damage wherein i am griffin and he is the long suffering justin. -- mod star

Star is basically my long distance sibling and functionally the only cousin I recognize bc like their parents are basically an aunt and uncle and like our dads look enough alike that we’ve both accidentally gotten the wrong dad for a hug or similar so like. Anyways yeah Star is the Griffin to my Justin, complete with our absent middle brother who we love dearly— mod aster

Dubiously relevant q but what kind of music do y’all listen to when u do art (if that is indeed a habit either of u partake in) (@pedanticlecturer)

It can depend on the piece? I was working on some (unrelated) oc prints that were song-focused, and for those I just listened to said song on loop. Sometimes I have playlists. Sometimes I’ll just be in a Mood and throw a song on loop. But a lot of time for the blog, I’ll listen to The Adventure Zone for the billionth time, because I have Too Much Attention. I’ve also, on request from Star, linked the most recent “loop song”.— mod aster

I tend to obsess over the same like 3 songs every few weeks so those get listened to on repeat but it also depends on the tone of what im drawing or who im drawing i might genre switch bc of that. If im drawing ophelia i stick to lana del rey and if im drawing hamlet its the neighborhood, horatio is sufjan stevens etc. i have categorized,. Most of the characters i draw into different songs/genres/energies of music but not like i ever follow that. Sometimes i just pull up a really long nonsense video and forget to draw. Essentially: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ -- mod star

How’d y’all come up with ur pseudonyms? (@pedanticlecturer)

I love space so much and my main blog is starryeydsailor space gay rights!! Im also tiny and full of energy and bright so basically i;m star -- mod star

Uhhhh i was like “hey i want to do uhhhhhh flower?” And then I google searched flower names until I found one I liked —- mod aster

How did you end up deciding the rough timeline of events in canon? (@pedanticlecturer)

It’s mostly determined by like. How we choose per story? If that makes sense. Like, we just take story by story, and decide “is it happening, has it happened, and when?” And then we fit them together in relation to each other just by dint of. All existing at once. Like, I knew I wanted Macbeth to be in aftermath, because like, even though there’s no murder, the way I’ve translated it to the AU is still kinda heavy, and it’s something that I don’t know that I could do properly if it were happening right now. Also, it’s more interesting IMO to have them at different times. Tl;dr we wing it per story and slot them together— mod aster (mod star agrees I just can word better, in theory)

If you could tell the story of shakespeare high in a different format than an ask blog, would you? Obviously y'all are making very good use of the format, but would you want to write this as a animated series or like? a comic book? or is the form inseparable from the story? (@pedanticlecturer)

I kinda wanted to do a webcomic or maybe to plot develop through like, animatics but the element of surprise comes from the asks we get and really makes us think so the blog is a good start. We didnt think we’d get this far -- mod star

Pretty much what Star said— there are certain elements where it’d be neat to do as a comic or as an animatic. Like, the fantasy dream is like, an anthology webcomic of each story, where you can like, see other characters in the background and stuff. But to be honest, we develop a lot by what we’re asked— there was a post about developing worldbuilding by being asked questions and then pretending you’ve thought about the answer, and it’s not far off. Personally, it’s hard to just lay out a story, because I have a whole WORLD and what’s relevant? What are people interested in? It’s by getting questions that I can then focus in on an area to develop. And yeah, we Super didn’t think we’d get this far lmao — mod aster

Any headcanons about your characters that you don't think will ever come up on the blog through asks or plot posts? (@pedanticlecturer)

I could make a whole separate post for this!!!!! Mostly its voice headcanons (and by mostly i mean like 1 or 2) or relationship hcs!!!! -- mod star

Honestly same. I don’t think I have voice headcanons for mine, though I bet I could find some. I’ve got a bunch of miscellaneous headcanons that just kinda float around, but like they’re scattered, too numerous for this post, and also not always things I’m sure are canon yet.— mod aster

[batsandbloodmoons]

Pagan Origins: Christmas

WARNING: LONG POST

So I’ve always had a love for knowing why we as people do certain things, it’s kind of a strange marriage between history and psychology. This really blossomed when I became a witch and started working on my craft. As part of developing my Sabbat traditions, and I plan on celebrating the pagan origins of Christmas as well as Yule, I figure I should learn about the history of them.

One of the things that baffled me were the major holidays that are celebrated in the United States. I was raised Roman Catholic, and have long since became disillusioned with the Church and ultimately switched to paganism. But I remember as a child, wondering about why we gave and received presents on Christmas when it was supposed to be Jesus’s birthday, why did we believe in a jolly fat man that delivered the presents, and why did we have a tree in the house? When I posed these questions to my family as a child, I never got a satisfactory answer... until now.

*Note* the following is for how Christmas is celebrated in the United States and are not universal to all cultures. Nor is it a hit at any religion.

❄️☀️🎄🎁🎅🎁🎄☀️❄️

GIFT-GIVING AND MERRYMENT

This custom started as far back as Ancient Rome and thier festival of Saturnalia. Originally, a farmers’ festival that was dedicated to Saturn, the god of agriculture and the harvest. According to Roman Mythology, Saturn was a titan and the father of Cronus, thus grandfather to Jupiter. Saturn was eventually overthrown by Cronus and moved west into the Italian peninsula. He then taught the people he meant there how to farm the land. In Greek Mythology, Saturn doesn’t have a name.

Saturnalia starts on December 17th and lasts until the 24th. Homes are decorated in wreaths and greenery. Feasts and parties werr thrown. People would overeat, overdrink and burst into songs in the streets (origin of caroling). Originally, the festival was only one day but grow longer and longer over time. By the time Rome converted to Christianity, Saturnalia now incorporated other festivals including Sigillaria, the day of gift giving which was on 12/23, and Died Natalie Solis Invicti, the birthday of the sun god Sol Invictus, which was on 12/25 because that is when it is noticeable that day is getting longer.

Saturnalia was so popular with the people that cancelling it was unthinkable when the Christian Coversion happened. So Saturnalia was transformed into a Christian holy day instead by replacing the sun god with baby Jesus. Despite the fact, that the Bible gave references to the time of Jesus’s birth being around the lambing season, in other words springtime. (bbc.co.uk)

SANTA CLAUS

Santa Claus has a number of origin stories and a number of different forms depending on the country in question. This will focus on the American version of Santa.

He can be traced back to a monk named Nicholas, later St. Nicholas by the Church, who was born around 280 A.D., in modern day Turkey. According to St. Nick’s legend, he was born into a wealthy family but gave away all of his possessions to travel the country and help the sick and the poor. One of his best know of these stories was when he raised enough money to cover the dowries of three sisters so they could marry instead of being sold into slavery or prostitution by thier father who couldn’t afford to care for them.

Over the course of the centuries, he became the protector of children and sailors. He died on December 6th, which became the day of his feast. It is also said to a lucky day for making a big purchase or getting married. By the time of Renaissance, he was the most popular saint in Europe and remained so during the Protestant Reformation, especially in Holland.

St. Nick was introduced into mainstream American culture at the end of the 18th century. In December 1773 and 1774, a New York newspaper reported that groups of Dutch families have gathered to celebrate St.Nick on the anniversary of his death.

The name Santa Claus evolved from his Dutch nickname, Sinster Klaad, which is a shortened form of Sint Nikolaas.

As his popularity grew, St. Nick was described as everything from a rascal with a blue three-cornered hat, red waistcoat, and yellow stockings to a man wearing a broad-brimmed hat and a “huge pair of Flemish Trunk hose.”

The Santa that most Americans know today didn’t emerge until 1822, when Clement Clarke Moore, an Episcopal minister, wrote a poem about Santa. He described Santa flying from house to house on Christmas Eve in a sleigh led by eight reindeer, leaving presents for deserving children. He gave Santa the ability to magically squeeze down the chimney and his love of milk and cookies.

In 1881, Santa got his iconic look from political cartoonist Thomas Nast, who used Moore’s poem as inspiration. His cartoon depicted Santa as rotund, cheerful man with a full, white beard, while holding a sack laden with toys. It was Nast who gave him his famous red suit trimmed with white fur, the Northpole workshop, the elves, and his wife, Mrs. Claus.

Other versions of St. Nicholas:

-Christkind or Kris Kringle was believed to deliver presents to well-behaved Swiss and German Children. Meaning “Christ Child”, Christkind is an angel-like often accompanied by St. Nick on Holiday missions.

- In Scandinavia, a jolly elf named Jultomten was thought to deliver gifts in a sleigh drawn by goats.

-English legend says that Fathrt Christmas visits each home on Christmas Eve to fill children’s stocking with treats.

-Pere Noel is responsible for filling the shoes of French children with treats that were left by the fireplace.

-In Russia, it is believed that an elderly woman named Babouschka purposely gave the three wise men the wrong directions to Bethlehem so that they couldn’t find Jesus. Later, she felt remorseful, but could not find the men to unto the damage. To this day on, 1/5, she visits Russian children leaving gifts at their bedsides in hope that one of them is the baby Jesus and she will be forgiven.

-In Italy, a woman called La Befana, a kindly witch who rides a broomstick down the chimneys of Italian homes to deliver toys into the stocking of lucky children. (History.com)

RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSE REINDEER

Rudolph was created over a hundred years after the other eight reindeer, in the 1920’s, by Robert L. May, a copywriter at the Montgomery Ward department store.

In 1939, May wrote a Christmas-themed story to bring holiday traffic into his store, which is the story Americans know today. In 1949, one of May’s friends, Johnny Marks, wrote a short song based on the poem. It was recorded by Gene Autry. The television movie, narrated by Burl Ives, was released in 1964. (History.com)

CHRISTMAS TREES

Plants and trees that remained green year had a special meaning for ancient people. One myth I heard, but couldn’t find a source for, for the reason Evergreens stay green was that. During the first winter, the sun spoke to the trees and told them that he would be resting for a few months and told them not to loose faith in his return. Months later the sun had not returned yet, many trees and plants began to lost faith and dropped thier leaves in thier despair. All except the Evergreens. When the Sun finally returned he saw what had happened, disappointed in those who lost faith, he cursed them to lose thier leaves every year while the Evergreens were allowed to keep their needles.

Another belief is that Evergreens would keep away witches, ghosts, evil spirits and illness when hung in the home.

In the Northern hemisphere, the winter solstice is the shortest day and longest night of the year, which falls on December 21st and 22nd. Many ancient people believed that the sun was a god and the winter came very year because the sun had become sick and weak. They celebrated the solstice because it meant that at last the sun would began to regain strength. Evergreens remind them of all the plants that would grow again when the sun was strong and summer would return.

Even ancient Egyptians worshipped the sun, in the form of Ra. At the solstice, when Ra began to recover from the illness, the Egyptians filled their homes with green palm rushes to symbolized the triumph of life over death.

Early Romans knew that the solstice meant that soon farms and orchards would be green and fruitful. They decorated their homes and temples with Evergreens. In Northern Europe, the Celtic Druids also decorated their temples with Evergreens as a symbol of everlasting life. Vikings would bring whole trees inside to preserve the spirit of nature.

However Germany is credited with starting the Christmas tree tradition as we know it. In the 16th century, Christians would build pyramids out of wood and decorate them with evergreens and candles. It was widely believed that Martin Luther, the 16th century Protestant reformer, first added lighted candles to a tree. The story goes that while walking home one winter evening, composing a sermon, he was awed by the brilliance of the stars twinkling amidst the evergreen trees. To recreate this for his family, he hung a tree’s branched with lighted candles.

In 1659 the General Court of Massachusettsenacted a law that made any observance of Christmas illegal because Christmas was too pagan in thier Puritan eyes. People were fined for hanging decorations, singing carols, decorating trees or any other joyful expression. That is until the 19th century when an influx of German and Irish immigrants came to America.

Before the then, Americans found Christmas trees to be an oddity m. The first record of one being on display was in the 1830’s by German immigrants in Pennsylvania, although the trees had already been a long standing tradition in German households. But as late as 1840’s, Christmas trees were still seen as pagan symbols and not accepted by most Americans.

That changed in 1846, when Queen Victoria and her German husband, Prince Albert were illustrated in a London newspaper, posing with thier children around a Christmas tree. Due to her popularity, Christmas trees became fashionable through out British and American societies.

By the 1890’s, Christmas ornaments were arriving from Germany and the tree’s popularity was on the rise in the U.S. It was noted that Europeans used small trees about, 4 feet in height, while Americans liked tall trees reaching from the ceiling to the floor.

The early 20th century saw Americans decorating their trees with homemade ornaments, while German-Americans continued to use apples, nuts, and marzipan cookies. The invention of electricity brought about Christmas lights, allowing trees to glow for days in end. With this, Christmas trees began to appear in town squares across the country and having a Christmas tree in the home became an American tradition. (History.com)

MISTLETOE

Mistletoe is actually a poisonous plant and its use as a peaceful symbol is rooted in Norse Mythology.

Baldr, the son of Frigg and Odin, was one of the most beloved of the gods. But he was plagued by dreams of his own death. So in an effort to protect her son, Frigg made everything: plant, animal, or rock, living in or growing in the earth, swear never to harm Baldr. As a result, he became invincible and the other gods began to use him for target practice because he always survived. But Loki, being his usual mischievous self, realize that mistletoe had been missed by Frigg, as it didn’t actually grow on the ground. He fashioned a weapon from some mistletoe. Whether that weapon was an arrow, dart, or spear depends on which version is told. But Loki persuades Hod, Baldr’s blind brother, to strike Baldr with the mistletoe weapon during a target practice session. This ensured that Hod took the immediate blame. Baldr died from a single wound and he was mourned deeply by all, especially his mother. Some versions say he was brought back to life, but most agree about what happened after his death, that Frigg‘ tears became mistletoe’s pearlescent berries, and in her grief, Frigg decreaded that mistletoe shall become a symbol of peace and love. Which is why now, people kiss under it today. (Mistletoe.org.uk)

HOLLY

Holly is another evergreen that is believed to ward off evil spirits when planted outside the house. When brought indoors, it increases fertility. Holly is believed to be linked with masculinity and most people use the holly bushes that produce red berries. But it is female holly bushes that produce said berries. Ivy is often the female equivalent to holly’s masculinity.

WREATH

It was difficult to find a definitive source about wreaths but the general consensus is that wreaths were made in a circle out of evergreens (holly, Laurel, or pine) to represent either the sun and life, or the wheel of the year. In fact the word Yule is believed to have stemmed from the Norse word “Jol” meaning wheel.

CANDY CANES

These are entirely Christian and were invented in 1670 when a German choirmaster at the Cologne Cathedral bent all white sugar sticks into canes for the children who attended the ceremonies. The shape is believe to represent a shepherd’s cane or the letter “J” for Jesus. After the advent of mass production, in the 1950’s, the red stripes were added. The red represented the blood of Jesus and the white was his purity. The three finer stripes were said to be the Holy Trinity (God, Jesus, and the Joly Spirit). The hardness is to symbolize the solid foundation of the Church. The peppermint flavor is supposed to stem from an herb called hyssop because, according to the Old Testament, hyssop was used to symbolize the purity of Jesus and his sacrifice. (Candyhistory.net)

ANGELS AND STARS

These refers to the debate of the tree toppers, angels or stars. The angel is represent the angel Gabriel, who came to Mary to ask her to bear God’s son, Jesus. The star refers to the Star of Bethlehem that wise men supposedly followed to find.

However since it was discussed above that Christmas lights are representations of the nighttime stars, then it could be argue that the star on top of the tree and being the largest, could be the sun, as it is the closest thus largest star to Earth.

🎄Please feel free to add to this as I tried to get most famous symbols of Christmas!! 🎄

[eddycurrents]

For the week of 19 November 2018

Quick Bits:

Aquaman #42 is a tie-in to the “Drowned Earth” event, following on his skewering at the hands of Poseidon in Justice League #11. Navigating his way through a dead realm is kind of a weird way for Dan Abnett to close out his run on the series, but it’s still a satisfying issue. Great art from Lan Medina, Vicente Cifuentes, and Gabe Eltaeb.

| Published by DC Comics

Batman #59 continues the “Tyrant Wing” arc with Batman acting a little unhinged on Penguin’s tip that Bane is running Arkham from the shadows, continuing his criminal empire to kill throughout Gotham. It’s interesting to see Batman alienate his allies again in his pursuit for vengeance.

| Published by DC Comics

Bettie Page #1 begins a new volume setting up an alien adventure in Britain, building upon the previous series but not requiring it as reading, from David Avallone, Julius Ohta, Ellie Wright, and Taylor Esposito. Bettie Page, paranormal investigator, is still a weird but entertaining remit and this opening issue does a good job of continuing in that vein as Bettie travels to England to investigate the Queen having been abducted by aliens. Ohta’s art also just keeps getting better and better.

| Published by Dynamite

Black Badge #4 employs a unique approach to flashbacks, with a solid spot colour in otherwise black and white image from Tyler and Hilary Jenkins. It’s a neat technique that really makes the scenes stand out.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Bloodborne #7 continues to question the realities and relationship of religion and science, even as the city’s fate becomes bleaker and the disease threatens more and more citizens. While I think I preferred the existential terror of the first arc more, this is still highly enjoyable.

| Published by Titan

Cold Spots #4 delivers a little bit of explanation as to what Grace has been brought to the island to do. I say a little bit, since there’s still a lot left unanswered in this penultimate issue. Gorgeous artwork from Mark Torres. You can almost feel the coldness coming off the pages.

| Published by Image

Cover #3 is some amazing storytelling. Somehow Brian Michael Bendis, David Mack, Zu Orzu, and Carlos M. Mangual are layering more and more into the narrative with each subsequent issue in such a brilliant way that you barely notice how many disparate pieces are being presented. It’s like an intricate tapestry being woven before us. This issue even has a special sequence illustrated by Bill Sienkiewicz of a fantasy story I desperately want to read the rest of.

| Published by DC Comics / Jinxworld

Crimson Lotus #1 begins a new series from John Arcudi, Mindy Lee, Michelle Madsen, and Clem Robins giving an origin story to Yumiko Daimio, one of Lobster Johnson’s enemies and grandmother to the BPRD’s favourite jaguar. It’s good, and an appearance early on from Rasputin just further shows some of the intricacies of the Hellboy universe.

| Published by Dark Horse

Devil Within #2 keeps the creepy factor up as Samantha and Michelle try to get help for Michelle’s possible possession. Excellent moody atmosphere provided by the art from Maan House and Dee Cunniffe.

| Published by Black Mask

Doctor Strange #8 begins “The Price” but it’s really just a continuation of the “Two Doctors” arc, building off the corruption of Strange’s former student. Mark Waid gives us some very interesting developments here regarding who is targeting him, along with Kamma finding out something Stephen wishes she wouldn’t, and the revelation of the location of one of the other gems from Cyttorak that were revealed to exist in X-Men Black.

| Published by Marvel

Evolution #12 ends the second arc with some lies, half-truths, and compelling confessions. The theme of change and mutation that has been evident since the first issue really comes to the fore this issue as some huge changes occur for the cast.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Exorsisters #2 gives more background to how the sisters came about through a deal with infernal powers by their mother. The art from Gisèle Lagacé and Pete Pantazis really is a huge draw.

| Published by Image

High Heaven #3 spends some time with Heather as she deals, kind of, with the loss of both David and Ben. Very weird things continue to go on in heaven with the usual great art from Greg Scott and Andy Troy. The Hashtag: Danger back-up remains funny with the lengths that the team goes to in order to save one of their own, only to have her kill herself again. And the prose pieces nicely round out the entire package.

| Published by Ahoy

Hot Lunch Special #4 delivers the penultimate chapter to not just one of the best crime stories I’ve read in years, but also just one of the best stories I’ve read in years period. Eliot Rahal, Jorge Fornés, and Taylor Esposito have really got something special here, with intriguing characters, an ever twisting plot, and some incredible visual. The layouts for this issue, breaking down the pacing, are just wonderful.

| Published by AfterShock

Immortal Hulk #9 is another staggeringly good issue, with a change for the Absorbing Man as he’s tapped to go up against the Hulk. While I am a little sad he didn’t stay legitimate following his redemption arc in Black Bolt, his development here from Al Ewing is pretty intriguing. Also love the art as the regular team of Joe Bennett, Ruy José, and Paul Mounts trade off pages with guest artist Martin Simmonds. The former illustrating the Hulk and the latter Creel before alternating in the battle between the two.

| Published by Marvel

Infinity 8 #7 begins the third loop “The Gospel According to Emma” from Lewis Trondheim, Fabien Vehlmann, and Olivier Balez. This reboot of the timeline starts off incredibly wrong as the Marshal approached to assist this time turns on the crew and effectively strands them in this timeline. There’s some interesting bits of grave robbers stealing treasure and overtones of the Marshal’s religion.

| Published by Lion Forge / Magnetic Collection

Infinity Wars: Ghost Panther #1 begins the final of these two-issue “Infinity Warps” mash-ups. Like the rest, it is incredibly well done. Jed MacKay, Jefte Palo, Jim Campbell, and Joe Sabino craft a tale merging Ghost Rider and Black Panther, seamlessly blending the two into something magical. The art from Palo and Campbell may well be the best of any of these minis and the art on all of them has been very impressive. Love the design for Zarathos.

| Published by Marvel

Judge Dredd: Toxic #2 has the violence and toxicity spillover as the explosion at one of the waste facilities causes increased fear and tension amongst the scrubbers hired to keep Mega-City One functioning. Paul Jenkins is crafting a tale full of the problems that come with xenophobia and the art from Marco Castiello, Vincenzo Acunzo, and Jason Millet just makes it visceral.

| Published by IDW

Justice League #12 has some really nice art from Frazer Irving for this penultimate chapter of the “Drowned Earth” event. Also, a very interesting revelation from Poseidon when it comes to the invading sea gods.

| Published by DC Comics

Justice League Dark #5 kicks off a new arc dealing with the ramifications of the first one, “The Witching Hour” crossover, and previous unrevealed tales of what happened with Detective Chimp after inheriting the Oblivion Bar. James Tynion IV gives some nice nods to the original Shadowpact series aided by beautiful art from Daniel Sampere, Juan Albarran, and Adriano Lucas.

| Published by DC Comics

The Last Space Race #2 introduces us to another member of the team, giving us a bit of his backstory, and largely making us want to drop him into a deep dark hole and forget that he’s there. Peter Calloway does a wonderful job of making Roger Freeman thoroughly unlikable, it’s kind of astonishing.

| Published by AfterShock

Lightstep #1 is a very different kind of sci-fi tale, mixing almost the feel of the decadence of Rome under Nero or Caligula and the high concept science fiction of a society that measures the class of its citizens by genetic similarity to their progenitor, and thereby assigns how “fast” they live. As I say, different from Miloš Slavković, Mirko Topalski, and Andrej Bunjac. Slavković’s art reminds me a bit Pasqual Ferry mixed with John Watkiss. The story itself somewhat reminds me of Watkiss’ work on John Jakes’ Mulkon Empire. On top of that, it’s part of a broader video game/media franchise from Eipix Entertainment, of which this looks like only the first volley (a novel and video game are forthcoming).

| Published by Dark Horse

The Lollipop Kids #2 continues to be a fantastic and fabulous comic from Adam & Aidan Glass, Diego Yapur, DC Alonso, and Sal Cipriano. The art alone from Yapur and Alonso would be worth the price of admission, but the characters, setting, and overall plot just elevate this beyond a typical kids fantasy type deal.

| Published by AfterShock

Low Road West #3 gets significantly stranger and much more surreal as reality seems to be growing thinner. We’re still not any closer to really understanding what’s truly going on, but it doesn’t really matter. Phillip Kennedy Johnson, Flaviano, Miquel Muerto, and Jim Campbell are telling one hell of a compelling story.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Mae #10 has Mae deal with some stuff in our world before stocking up and returning back to Cimrterén to resume her search for her father. Gorgeous artwork as always from Gene Ha and Wes Hartman.

| Published by Lion Forge / Roar

Marvel Knights #2 sees Matthew Rosenberg and Nico Henrichon join Donny Cates for this chapter, giving a bit of back story on how Banner roped in Castle into searching out the various heroes and leads to a confrontation with Elektra. Still no closer to understanding what happened here, but it does get weirder with a hallucinatory Karen Page. Henrichon’s art is just perfect for telling this story.

| Published by Marvel

Middlewest #1 is a magical debut of this new series from Skottie Young, Jorge Corona, Jean-Francois Beaulieu, and Nate Piekos. It’s a fantasy grounded in the reality of growing up hard in Middle America, with Abel dealing with an abusive father, while just trying to be a kid. But there’s a talking fox and devastating sentient storms. Rather inventive stuff all around. I’m also getting the impression that Jorge Corona should really be a household name. Between No. 1 with a Bullet, Old Man Jack, and now this, he’s been killing it recently.

| Published by Image

Night Moves #1 is a pretty great debut from VJ Boyd, Jordan Boyd, Clay McCormack, Mike Spicer, and Shawn DePasquale. It’s a gritty crime drama with occult overtones, but most of the weirdness is just simmering under the surface so far as the protagonists work to find out what kind of mess they’re in. McCormack and Spicer’s art really capture the feel of the seediness of the story well.

| Published by IDW

Optimus Prime #25 brings it all to a close, with a flashback through Optimus’ life and little vignettes of the various Transformers from John Barber, Kei Zama, Josh Burcham, and Tom B. Long. I’m really going to miss this world. 

| Published by IDW

Pearl #4 is probably the most stereotypical Bendis issue to date, but the dialogue doesn’t tip over into the ridiculous territory. Most of this issue is a conversation between Pearl and tattoo boy, but at least it’s interesting conversation and not random pop culture references repeated as questions.

| Published by DC Comics / Jinxworld

Pestilence: A Story of Satan #5 gives a bittersweet end to this story, filled with loss and sacrifice. It’s kind of fitting considering how bleak both this and the first series have been. Wonderful art from Oleg Okunev, Guy Major, Michael Garland, and Marko Lesko.

| Published by AfterShock

The Punisher #4 may well be one of the bloodiest, most violent mainline 616 Marvel Universe Punisher issues yet as Jigsaw and an assortment of Hydra goons attempt to kidnap Frank from prison. Matthew Rosenberg and Szymon Kudranski are continuing to keep this book moving at a breakneck pace, like an action movie that barely takes any moments to breathe.

| Published by Marvel

Quantum & Woody! #12 brings this volume to a close, with an interesting character study of the brothers at the hands of GATE and X-O Manowar.

| Published by Valiant

Rumble #9 brings “Things Remote” to an end with an epic battle between the Esu and Rathraq’s friends, leading to an interesting realization for Rathraq and what he wants out of life. Stunningly beautiful art from David Rubín and Dave Stewart.

| Published by Image

Shadowman #9 continues the “Rag and Bone” arc as Alyssa and Jack confront Sandria Darque. Gorgeous artwork from Renato Guedes, Eric Battle, and Ulises Arreola. 

| Published by Valiant

Shuri #2 continues the search for Black Panther, while back on Earth the women of Wakanda form a council to figure out how to maintain and administer the nation while he’s missing. Definitely some interesting concepts and character points from Nnedi Okorafor. Phenomenal artwork and layouts from Leonardo Romero and Jordie Bellaire.

| Published by Marvel

Spider-Force #2 is probably one of the bleakest, mean-spirited stories I’ve read in a while. This isn’t a bad thing, but the story’s a bit of a downer as the nature of an irradiated world without hope seems to permeate everything, including characters like Jessica Drew who are normally at least a bit more level-headed. Priest is writing a very dark story, with some complicated characters like Peter’s granddaughter who grew up in the Old Man Logan universe and a Peter Parker who looks like he was abused by Uncle Ben.

| Published by Marvel

Spider-Geddon #4 kind of spoils the need to read Spider-Force #3 out in three weeks, which just kind of adds to the downer feel of that series. This issue turns darker itself with a bevy of betrayals. Christos Gage has kind of stacked the deck against the spiders, I wonder how they’re going to get out of it in the finale.

| Published by Marvel

Stellar #6 concludes the series and it is incredibly messed up. The conflict between Zenith and Stellar is bizarre and perverse, but I don’t really want to go into it more because spoilers would ruin its impact. Joe Keatinge, Bret Blevins, and Rus Wooton have done an amazing job with this series. Highly recommended.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Sukeban Turbo #1 is another series originally published by Glénat Editions in France, translated into English for North American markets. It’s a mix of teenage rebellion, crime, and following a boy band from Sylvain Runberg, Victor Santos, and Shawn Lee. The art from Santos is worth it on its own, very impressive layouts and storytelling.

| Published by IDW

Summit #10 kicks off the third arc for the series and like most of the Catalyst Prime series recently it undergoes a bit of a change in status quo. Val finds out that she hasn’t been hallucinating, but hearing the voice of another of her team that was essentially vaporized during the event, before having her life turned upside down as the government starts hunting her. Amy Chu continues writing the series, while she’s joined by Marika Cresta fully for the art here.

| Published by Lion Forge / Catalyst Prime

Tony Stark: Iron Man #6 begins “Stark Realities” and the launch of Tony’s eScape virtual reality game. Dan Slott, with a script assist from Jeremy Whitley, does a great job of making it feel chaotic at launch, with some ordinary and extraordinary problems occurring. The pissed off griefer is hilarious.

| Published by Marvel

Web of Venom: Carnage Born #1 is an interesting reinterpretation of Carnage’s origin to fit within the new mythology being crafted in the current Venom series, also building off the recent two-part arc there with the Maker, from Donny Cates, Danilo S. Beyruth, Cris Peter, and Clayton Cowles. This is more very entertaining outgrowth of the Marvel Universe from Cates and gives us a quite possibly deadlier Carnage.

| Published by Marvel

West Coast Avengers #4 concludes the first arc in fairly straightforward fashion as the team deals with BRODOK and the women transformed into giant monsters. Some nice little character moments from Kelly Thompson and great art from Stefano Caselli and Tríona Farrell.

| Published by Marvel

The Whispering Dark #2 continues its existential and moral crisis as the squad commits war crimes as they struggle to survive. There’s something off about how everything is happening, in how Christofer Emgård is writing the narration, but I’m not sure if it’s just the in-story reason of the go-pills. It feels like the squad is already in Hell and being judged.  

| Published by Dark Horse

Other Highlights: American Carnage #1, Archie #700, Black AF: Widows & Orphans #4, Black Hammer: Age of Doom #7, Burnouts #3, Days of Hate #10, Dejah Thoris #10, Dick Tracy: Dead or Alive #2, East of West #40, Encounter #8, GI Joe: A Real American Hero - Silent Option #2, Go-Bots #1, Jughead: The Hunger #10, The Long Con #5, Love & Rockets #6, Lucifer #2, Lumberjanes #56, Mars Attacks #2, The New World #5, Olivia Twist #3, Project Superpowers #4, Rick & Morty Presents Pickle Rick #1, Smooth Criminals #1, Star Wars #57, Star Wars: Solo #2, TMNT: Urban Legends #7, Underwinter: Queen of Spirits, Xena: Warrior Princess #10

Recommended Collections: 24 Panels, Accell - Volume 3: Turf Battles, Amazing Spider-Man: Renew Your Vows - Volume 4: Are You Okay, Annie?, Crude - Volume 1, Dark Souls Omnibus, Delta 13, Dungeons & Dragons: Evil at Baldur’s Gate, Flavor, Immortal Hulk - Volume 1: Or is he Both?, Justice League - Volume 1: The Totality, Peter Parker: The Spectacular Spider-Man - Volume 4: Coming Home, Resident Alien - Volume 5: An Alien in New York, Spidey: School’s Out, Stray Bullets: Sunshine & Roses - Volume 3, Unnatural - Volume 1: Awakening, Venom - Volume 1: Rex, The X-Files: Case Files - Volume 1

d. emerson eddy wonders if there’s going to be any light in our real darkest hour.

[elane-in-the-shadows]

Red Queen Fan Fiction - Blood Curse Chapter 28

Find this on wattpad and on ao3

chapter 1

chapter 2

chapter 3

chapter 4

chapter 5

chapter 6

chapter 7

chapter 8

chapter 9

chapter 10

chapter 11

chapter 12

chapter 13

chapter 14

chapter 15

chapter 16

chapter 17

chapter 18

chapter 19

chapter 20

chapter 21

chapter 22

chapter 23

chapter 24

chapter 25

chapter 26

chapter 27

chapter 28

chapter 29

Final chapter

Mare POV

The march begins in two days hence, but Iris Cygnet already stands on the frontline-to-be like a raised flag. It’s because of her cape, long and waving in the wind. In hindsight, that piece of clothing alone should’ve given her away when I saw her first. Who wears a blue cape with such intricate design and embroidery, more-so in a war-camp? Not that it’s indecently sumptuous, only richly made. Apparently, Iris can’t wait for the enemy to see her, or she merely likes to pose majestically as she faces the direction we’re going to take. Maybe they aren’t as of much of an enemy to her as to us, as they’re Lakelanders, her citizens. Yet she’s too careful to rely alone on their knowledge of their princess and their loyalty to her, as she wears functional black armour beneath the conspicuous cape. She wears both all the time, whether she walks over battlefields or in the camp, either leading or training our nymphs. By now, I’ve finally seen what Iris can do with rain and it left me believing in the claims she made to our leaders, promising to breach the enemy lines which we – so far –  failed do on our own.

After she arrived, on a meeting I took part in, Iris conveyed this eloquently without saying it all too plain. She sat in her chair like it was a throne, flanked by Captain Ives, the companion who brought her who’s also Roman Eagrie’s new brother-in-law. That was strange enough, not even to speak of the apparent trust Iris put in the Red-blooded Ives. The commanders, meanwhile, tried their best to hide their own confusion when dealing with the ex-queen of Norta, now the crown princess of the Lakelands.

“When I pledged to the Scarlet Guard recently,” Iris said, “it was decided it’d be for the best if I joined these fights. That aligned with my own intentions, I admit. I’m offering you my powers in the ways you see fit, Generals, but I think to be the greatest asset among your own nymphs, teaching – and eventually – leading them.”

Her polite tone was met by dark expressions, me contributing my part. She wasn’t swayed by them. “Not to forget I know how to work against the tactics my mother and her generals use, so this stalemate will be over before it drags on as long as before.”

Akkadi took a sharp breath. “As if you’re the only capable one here, ma’am? We’re to rely on your word to sabotage your own mother and not us?”

Iris swallowed, hesitating, pondering. “Indeed,” she agreed. “Indeed. If it soothes your suspicions, I did come with requests relating to my support.”

The room, curious for more, lost a little tension as if this was only to be expected. Silvers with “requests” were familiar ground.

Iris noticed this too. I saw her take Ives’s hand in the shadows under the table. “Firstly, I wish to negotiate with my mother in person. I’m certain you realize the advantage of that.”

I heard a few people starting to mumble. “Her fault for vanishing and provoking the water witch to run rampart.”

Iris continued, mostly unperturbed but aware of the lack of an answer. “Secondly, I want my mother’s life to be spared.”

“Ma’am,” Davidson prepared to object. But he hardly knew how to address her, ma’am being an acceptable cop-out. “That is a lot to ask, given her recent acts – “

“Weren’t it your allies, the Samos of the Rift, who instigated this?” Iris countered. “They attacked the Lakelands. Apparently, you let them. I wonder how Volo Samos convinced you, he and his family never seemed like the diplomatic sort to me.” She smiled. “Or that is just my impression, as they were never interested in being diplomatic and allying with me.

“However, I promise you to do better than them. I will settle this, and I will convince my mother to bring the peace as we intended to a year ago. And yes, that will include all of you, the Red activists of the Scarlet Guard. I can think of ways – “

“So you plan to keep your power and the rank of a crown princess, and queen-to-be?” Davidson inquired.

“That is not my plan.” Several gasps. From me, too. I couldn’t believe someone like her would be serious about this, and not only sweet-talk us like those before her. “My mother the queen,” she went on, “is the head of the church of our country, and she’ll act accordingly. To preserve and … to reform, too. Currently, she’s acting as a secular ruler which the head is usually supposed to leave to appointed politicians. She chose to change this for … family reasons, which you all know, my father and sister having been those appointed rulers. Yet, I see no reason why people like you should not replace the old agents so you can take your share in governing the Lakelands. There is no law forbidding this.”

“Now that is an offer, ma’am.” Davidson appeared duly smug. “Although you still sound very conservative.”

Iris blinked. “It is an offer, Premier Davidson. I wouldn’t presume to set this in motion without your advice, or the approval of the citizens of the Lakelands.” She looked around, scanning the room filled with potential enemies. “I do wish to preserve … some things,” she admitted. “Our faith, our traditions. Is that too much to ask?” She became more passionate with every word – which also revealed a subtle insecurity on her part. “There’re Lakelanders in this war, in this room. Do you wish to destroy our culture, hoping that alone will make everything better? I do not believe we need to shatter and forget the past to build anew, and therefore, I wish my mother to live – and repent.” A pleading note entered her voice. “If you cooperate, there’ll be amnesty for all Lakelander members of the Scarlet Guard.”

It was a wrong thing to say, angering the Lakelanders she tried to appeal to. Why would we need her amnesty if we won? Then again, did we have the certainty to win? What would Farley have said to her?

“You’re praising a faith that benefits you, your highness,” a soldier sneered and this, finally, took Iris aback. She flinched.

“I … won’t continue to demand those benefits for myself. I swear,” she insisted. “The succession of religious leaders will be reorganized, too. I won’t take such a position. You understand, the defining features of the faith are not about division.”

“They aren’t?” someone scoffed.

Iris straightened. “No.”

“I’ve never heard – “

“Comrades, please,” a soldier from the Lakelands intervened. “It’s true. The faith is about the divinity surrounding us, in ourselves, in nature, in every moment. The Silvers spill their own nonsense to cement their rule, but when they argue with the faith, they’re kidnapping it.” And although the soldier cleared the ground for Iris with this, she had some glares left for Iris, too. “Not that we don’t expect you to live up to those grand promises, ma’am.”

Iris nodded, meeting her gaze. “Thank you, ma’am. Indeed, I’d claim to be too honourable to make empty promises.” She stood up. “But no matter what I say, I can only step forward as one of many. It won’t mean anything if no one follows. I can walk in the front of the battles to come, but it’s your choice to come with me.

“Will you follow me?”

What would’ve happened if they’d remained silent? The moment dragged on long enough to make me wonder. But I was one of those to raise a hand, and the affirmative calls began which Iris answered with her own, quiet, “rise, red as the dawn.”

I knew I couldn’t trust her words. But I trust in what she can do.

„What storm we could make together, Sergeant Barrow,” Iris says to me. She must’ve noticed me sneaking around her after the end of my shift. It was an early end, due to the preparations for the coming charge. Although I’ve been lurking for days, only not as near as today.

Now I close the distance between us, done with playing pretend. Yet she doesn’t turn to me at first, heavily focused on conjuring shapes out of the water and fluids in the air around us, that is, maybe in a radius of 25 meters. When she looks at me over her shoulder, the patterns she made freeze for a second, before, with a swing of her arm, they change from “shields” and “arrows” into stylized lightning. Or a liquid cage.

She tilts her head. “Wouldn’t we?”

I scoff. “I’m not sure,” I reply. “The wind element’s still missing, isn’t it? Or is that the ability of your friend Ives?”

She shakes her head. “Technically …” She smiles. “No, he couldn’t.”

“You really like him? I’m surprised, Iris.” She’s stunned too, at my use of her first name. “I thought you royals don’t have friends, much less Red ones.”

The personal topic flusters her visibly and as she fights to maintain her composure, I expect her to just send me off. Yet I’m amused, enjoying to unsettle a Silver royal. Because she’s one, no matter what she announces. She must be used to this by now and swallows a breath. “He brought me here, and helped me out before. He became a friend to me.” She shrugs. “I assume you can understand that.”

I don’t really, but I respect her unspoken plea for privacy on that. To a point. “Certainly.” I smile back. “But I’m merely wondering, like so many here, what it was he helped you with, which kept you missing for so long.”

“I see. This is another trial about trust.” She stares at me while no muscle in my face moves. The water continues its play. Iris sighs. “I feel inclined to remind you I’m here by choice, on my own account, and allying with your cause.”

“An alliance you let us pay for dearly.”

“Have I asked for any untoward conditions?” She’s less calm now, for her standards. “All I’ve brought up I did believing it’d benefit the Scarlet Guard in the end.”

The watery shapes turn back into a shield and attack pattern, as if with the lightning pattern gone, our conversation is over. But Iris doesn’t even turn away from me. She continues to fixate with her gaze until I’m the one to give in. “Why would you think,” she begins, quieter now, “I haven’t paid dues on my own for the peace I wish for?”

I can’t avoid to snicker. “Excuse me,” I say. “But that’s something I know a lot about.”

The corners of her mouth twitch. “If we have finally something in common, why not use this common ground as a reason to return to my request?” I blink. “To call forth a storm?” she adds.

I shrug, then start to show off some of the tricks I learned from Ella. But despite Iris’s talk of a common ground, she revealed nothing about what she claims to have given up, although I can imagine enough, especially in case of someone who came too close to Maven Calore.

Merciless rains fall during our march. The dark and grey sky forebodes the coming battle and the air feels charged with electricity, whether from a gathering storm or just from my ability I can’t say. It certainly erases any easiness in our approach, with water soaking our clothes, tents and food. Our boots often stay stuck in the mud. But to march we have as our schedule is tight, decisively so. We’re supposed to sneak closer to the Lakelander camp for a surprise attack as long as our own location remains unknown.

“I wonder if Lakelanders conjured this bloody weather!” Kilorn curses.

“Wouldn’t be surprised,” I reply in agreement. The rain feels like a threat on its own, like a poison, a noose about to strangle us.

“That is unlikely.” Kilorn and I jerk when we hear General Akkadi joining our talk. Iris Cygnet walks next to her, no doubt trying to glean as much information as possible.

“The General is right,” she agrees. “The stormcallers of the Lakelands could do this in theory, but not for so long. Not when they don’t know our exact location. Rather they would create fog or a storm right before the battle begins.”

“What a smart-ass,” Kilorn whispers and I elbow him while suppressing my own snicker.

“Let’s hope this warning will help us when the time comes,” I say.

Iris nods. “Then, we’ll all work together to spring our own trap.”

Even on the trek scouting remains a necessity. Still I’m in a team with Roman Eagrie and keep my lightning ready for a charge. But this night has a different kind of tension, when our attention is as vital while we’re much less safe.

Eagrie touches my arm. “Hush, stop,” he whispers. My eyes widen and I summon lightning in my fingertips while keeping it weak enough to hide it from view. Eagrie takes his rifle off his back, aims and shoots four times in one fluid motion.

“Done?” I murmur.

He checks for a few more seconds, then relaxes. “Yes.”

“You’re a good shooter,” I say as we go to look for the bodies.

He smiles wrily. “It helps when you know you’ll hit the target.” The four enemy scouts are certainly dead but I don’t feel at ease yet. Instead, a sense of danger lingers on my mind. Even more so when the leaves of the woods rustle.

I shove Eagrie aside and create a lightning shield before the Lakelander can assault us. But the person appearing isn’t a Lakelander, at least not an enemy one. I tsk. “You’ve scared us, Princess Iris,” I say sarcastically although my heart still beats fast. “Or did you want them to take you with them?”

She shakes her head and comes closer. Amusement shines in her eyes, even in the dim torch light. At least she can get a joke. “Well done,” she says. “But their absence will send its own kind of message to their commander.”

I shrug.

“To answer your question, Sergeant Barrow,” she says, “no. I didn’t intend that. Yes, I plan to negotiate but a battle is unavoidable. It’ll be to the advantage of the Scarlet Guard as well to fight one.”

“If we win,” I object.

She nods. “I believe you’ll be vital to that victory. Good night.” She turns to leave, her cape dragging on the wet ground. Does the clamminess even bother her? Then she stops. “I wonder, Sergeant, why you chose to fight.” She points to the sky. “It was decided one electricon has to stay back to keep up with the interceptions of the airjets, as a distraction.” That’s true, Tyton’s the one. “That could’ve been you,” Iris goes on, “and yet you’re here.”

She seems frankly curious, but I’m not in the mood for banter and chatting. “I’m fed up with people making decisions for me, and I rather fight my battles myself.”

“I’m sure of that.” She looks at me, expectant, understanding. I almost wait for her to apologize for being complicit in my imprisonment, and a thousand other matters.

“Can I make a request?” she asks.

I raise an eyebrow. “Another one?”

The corners of her mouth twitch. “Just a last one, please,” she says. I wave a hand.

It replaces her amusement with earnestness. “I’d be grateful if you told me whether you killed Maven,” she asks. “Or whether he’s alive at all, if you knew.”

I suck in a breath. She craves to know this and her eyes are adamant, demanding an answer. I hate how I freeze when he’s mentioned. Iris notices and lowers her head respectfully. She gives me a moment but doesn’t apologize or waves it off.

“I have not,” I spit out. “You should ask Tiberias. Didn’t you leave behind him with his brother?”

She almost bows this time. “I thank you, Mare Barrow.” I shrug, swallow the topic before it can fester in my mind. Now she takes her leave for good, and raindrops follow, forming into swivels like an aethereal train. So ostentatious, a showiness Maven would’ve liked.

Breaks are soggy affairs, as is sleep. Whether we walk or rest, the rain is an incessant nuisance. In our sleeping bags, I cuddle against Kilorn to fight the clamminess with body warmth, with Rafe on his other side.

“Look,” Rafe says, pointing to white lightning in the distance. “It’s Tyton in action.”

I smile. “Good to know.”

Rafe sighs. “Too bad we can’t answer him.”

I nod. “Soon, he’ll see us as well.” Soon, when the real battle starts.

The call comes too soon. The camp rises, everyone runs to get into formation. “Seems like the Lakelanders found us first,” pants Nadine. “That demands operation B2, Barrow!”

“Sure!” I nod and we head to our respective units. The thrill of the coming battle courses through me, mixing fear and excitement.

Now it happens.

General Akkadi organizes the troops like a conductor, setting everyone in place according to the plans and her absolute foresight. She nods to me, pointing to my position at the front line. I swallow and go on, searching my way through the crowd and seeing more of the enemy with every step. Fortunately, we have the higher ground, standing on the upper end of the slope they’re climbing. At the foot of the hill, fog gathers and clouds the expanse of their army.

But their nymphs are at the front, as planned, already threatening to destroy our advantage in position by, once again, pulling away the ground beneath our feet. The mud only makes that easier

Our nymphs are prepared for this charge, about to counter the Lakelanders by interfering with their own control over the element. As a result, the water supposed to wash us away and flood the camp is turned into a whirlwind gyrating around the frontlines, more and more resembling the eye of a storm.

Akkadi barks several commands to get us into place, calling back armed soldiers while Rafe and I step forward on both ends of our vanguard, the nymphs between us, and only waiting for Akkadi’s next order. She’s still scanning the whole of the battlefield, assessing the perfect moment. Terrifying seconds drag on and current tickles my skin. Yet when the call comes, I hesitate. Am I ready for this? Are the nymphs? If this goes wrong …

I release my breath and stop thinking, I fall to my knees and put my hands onto the ground, into a puddle. And then, I let loose all the electricity I can summon, once, twice, until nothing is left.

The current, both from me and Rafe, is conducted by the muddy earth and swirls of water controlled by our nymphs, leading directing towards the enemy. They can’t get away, first paralysed by the shocks and soon killed by them.

I sink into the mud, wholly depleted. But it was a success, the majority of the enemy vanguard is down as well, unconscious or electrocuted. Akkadi shouts again, urging me to rise as we have no time to spare when timing is absolute. I have to get up, and now our gunners step forward to shoot anyone still standing. Yet as I move, my eyes stray over our nymphs, searching for losses. By Akkadi’s visions and command, they should’ve known when to sever the physical link to the water conduits to stay safe, but I might’ve just as well taken down some of our own.

“Help!” someone cries, and m head spins. There they are, my victims. I can’t run past them, so I go straight to the source. Iris Cygnet was the one who called, and she bends over an unconscious nymph, grabbing a knife to cut through his uniform and start to massage his chest.

“I don’t think he needs any more electricity, Sergeant Barrow,” she hisses.

“No,” I say. “I’m sorry – careful!” I shout, and she looks up to see the Lakelander soldier heading towards us.

Iris curses. She lets go of the nymph and fumbles for a gun; she shoots just in time but the Lakelander outstretches a hand and the bullet dissolves in a heat wave.

An oblivion.

I try to call my lightning but it’s still too soon – nothing happens. Iris spills another surge of curses in her native tongue and gather a water wall as a defense. Still I can feel the next shockwave coming from the oblivion. He forces through, causing Iris to shift her water wall.

“What should we …” I utter, but she already grabs my hand and wraps us in another wave, just before the oblivion shatters the earth and we fall.

I open my eyes with a groan. Now I can add bruises to my exhaustion although I begin to feel again the sparks in my veins. I get up and check my surroundings, now a few hundred meters away form the battle. Not that I can reach it easily, as the ledge we were on has broken off. I find Iris on my other side, bending over the nymph once more. I approach her but her attempts at first aid are over, now she’s murmuring a few verses. Prayers. She doesn’t heed my presence until she’s done.

“Rest in peace, James Huntingdon” she concludes, and focuses on me. She nods. “Good you’ve gotten away as well.”

She stands up, about to get going on. Her stance reflects both weariness and determination, a stance I know all too well, one I force myself into often enough. “What do you intend to do?” I ask.

“Do you want to come with me?” she smiles, wrily. “I go to find my mother, I should be able to guess where she is.”

Of course. “Why should I? Do you want to present me as your prisoner?”

She frowns. “No.”

“You were okay with it before.”

Her lips quiver but don’t produce a straight answer. “I won’t force you into anything, Mare Barrow. You can come with me, or stay with James, or whatever else you think is best.”

When I don’t reply, she turns without looking back.

I let her go, and still I watch her. I shouldn’t, better I focus on a way back. I curse my bad luck at finding myself once again between the lines, unable to just rejoin my unit. Nor do I want to leave James behind. He died because of me, after all, and he deserves better than to be buried in mud.

I head to a higher ground to see more and even climb a tree to find a possible and safe way to return to the fights. Yet the broken ledge is still impossible to scale and I doubt I can carry James all the way round. It’d be safe enough for me though, although it’d also take me a day. I can’t decline my urge to look after Iris as well, as she’s easy to locate in her silly cape. How careless, but if she puts a conspicuous appearance above everything else? In front of her, the main body of the Lakelander army is harder to see. Strange.

Or not. The way the mist parts and gathers has no natural source, I can see that now. It must be controlled by nymphs or stormcallers and Iris is just a few hundred meters away from the fog, already becoming enwrapped in it herself. I doubt her sight is as good as mine, as long as she doesn’t chase off the fog.

So she can’t see he unit separating from the back of the army, marching in the direction of the frontline while hidden by fog and glamour.

“Oh you stupid girl, you’re walking into a trap!” I utter.

But so am I, since I jump off my tree and run after Iris.

I’m about to reach her just as she parts the fog but before I can warn her, its already too late – the soldiers appear from the mist and attack the intruder, unaware it’s their princess. Iris sidesteps as knives fly her way, one of them cutting her hand. The next moment, she’s lifted into the air and swung hard onto the ground.

I drop to the earth, too. Are they telkies? Or magnetrons who use her armour against her? Undecided between crashing into the scene and figuring out a better plan, I watch the enemy leader send their soldiers ahead. They vanish quickly, someone among them restoring their stealth. Their supposed purpose fills me with dread, certainly it’s a surprise charge against us. I grind my teeth. Why does their commander stay back? Have they finally recognized Iris? But when she tries to rise, a volley of something like spikes heads her way and she can only roll out of the way.

The commander has to be a magnetron.

Hit in the leg, Iris doesn’t get up. The Lakelander commander approaches her and strangely, he appears neither relieved to have finally found his princess, nor shocked to have assaulted her. No, when he bends down to grab her by the chin, his demeanour oozes smugness.

I sneak closer to be certain but I already know the man holding Iris in his grasp is Volo Samos.

“How come my mother released you from your king’s cage?” Iris sneers.

He cackles and grabs her tighter, probably choking her. “Haven’t you heard, your majesty? It seems that the Lakelanders and I have a mutual enemy,” he gloats. Iris groans. “Your mother the queen was against it, but in the end, she had to agree with her clever advisors.” When he smiles, I feel a surge of his power although I hardly wear any metals. He’s even stronger than Evangeline.

“But unfortunately. I have to see the rumours regarding you are true, and you do fight for our enemy.”

Iris wriggles and kicks, her hands move to conjure water and assault Samos whose expression becomes aching. But the water that splashed his face falls down as he pushes on, to make Iris scream in pain.

“I wouldn’t try that again!” he calls and Iris’s knife leaves its sheathe and starts to levitate an inch from her head. “Do this another time, Your Highness, and you’re dead.” Then metal loosens from his armour and forms into a rope he uses to bound her hands. “After all these undignified months of captivity, I find myself truly fortunate,” he gloats some more. “When I return you to your royal mother, she’ll have no choice but to offer me clemency and acknowledgement of the Rift. Whether the same goes for you, I’m not so sure.” He rises and lets go of her throat, pulling her along by her manacles. “A disobedient child has to be punished.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure either.” Volo’s head spins around to face me and the lightning shooting from my hands, towards him.

“Barrow!” he yells and spikes fly off his armour, charged at me, and some of them making in to their target. I supress a cry of pain.

He only drops to a knee. Damn, my lightning is still too weak to kill him with one blow and I have my own problems to maintain my stance.

Iris doesn’t waste time. She used my attack to remove her manacles and collects water to lift Samos into the air, wrapping him into a whirl he can’t escape. She doesn’t have to give me a sign. Despite the bleeding wounds in my stomach and my leg, I summon all the electricity I can and throw it at Samos, frying him, letting it course through the water, his metal armour and his body until he’s only a charred mess.

My knees sink into a puddle and I stare at Volo Samos’s dead body with satisfaction. As long as I can. I would’ve fallen down completely if Iris didn’t come to pull me onto her lap. She tears at her cape, staunching my wound with it and her own bleeding hand. And yet, my red blood drops like the cursed rain and mixes with her silver blood.

She looks so determined, and yet so desperate. “Hang in there,” she pants, “I’ll have it bandaged soon!”

I chuckle, and rue it for the pain it brings, but hoping she’s right. But we’re in no man’s land, who should come to save us? “I’ve done it,” I whisper instead.

“Hm?”

“I told myself I was born to kill a king and now I’ve succeeded,” I cackle. It impedes Iris’s efforts but she only tries harder. “But it wasn’t the one I expected it to be,” I continue.

“So, you intend to kill another?” she asks, a little wary.

I sigh, both for the topic and the pain. “… I don’t know. I couldn’t face him. I have to. To tell him he has no power over me.” Although just having this thought means he still has. “He’s already done what he can to me,” I say.

Recognition dawns on Iris’s face. “Then you have to keep going, Mare!” Live, if only to spite Maven …” She continues to talk, I can hardly listen. “We’ll both live, and when this is al over, you’ll forget Maven and I’ll hold Arthur, just one time at least …”

I still hear her, and the sounds of the distant battlefield. But all I see is the white-grey sky that makes me feel like time has stopped.

@clarafarleybarrow @mareshmallow @redqueenfandom @lilyharvord @inopinion @hannaharies @samanthaslytherin @kihlorn @mareenattitanos @redqueenforever @marecalrandomstuff @wrenskonos @runexandra @artbooks-trash @selenbean-beany @scarletguardsource

[ast-heljar]

the path of a witch or some such other came to me, really, when I was eight. it wasnt flashy, like some, and I would venture that nothing significant happened excpet that it has been on my mind for so long.

it wasnt just the idea of a witch, that is certainly present enough for an american kid. Halloween is a reoccurring thing. Witches are all over in child media.

and I would mention things from before that age like when I was more connected to the air than water. Like being relatively ostracised until I was in the 2nd grade for being to different-- ive learned it was probably the autism, but then i suppose that in and of itself says something, implies a certain level of the fae from a historical mythologic level rather than a scientific real world one. of course there was a time when there was no difference...

but all kids are strange as they work out the world, right? Adults often forget, I think, that there are so many things kids have literally never experienced before.

but when I was eight I found it and it hasnt left since. It didnt leave when I pushed it away until I was 12 or 13 bevause what does a kid actually know about hexes anyway. And then it was the things that we did, that shared energy and experience. I think they out grew it. i never did.

It didnt leave as I had a crisis of faith when I was 14, if you can even call it that considering I never had much faith to begin with. When i stumbled and struggled for information when I was 15 and discovered the idea of traditional folklore paths when I was 16.

It certainly hasnt left since I was 17 and 18 and discovered the only real accessable online source for such things as Sarah Lawless and another woman whose name I cant remember. Her blog had been dead for about a year by then, but I do remember how it spoke to me. There was other information, of course, witchvox helped me by at least throwing around enough opinions to find a foundation for my own but I cant say I took away things that actually benefited my practice.

Of course there was more information, but where was the question. It exists, but for all the digging i did I think it must have existed on a private forum which was accessable only after approval and never appeared to be active. I always wonder what was there, but not so much that I go back and dig for it. and of course it must have been between the lines, because there are many people who study on their own...

but i wouldnt necessarily label that as easily available. The more I hear about the "pagan community" the less I care for it, but of course the name is a misnomer. there is no single community for all we call it that. lessons lie behind charletons, racists, and sexual abusers, for prices I wasnt willing to pay.

i paid anyway, the same price for different lessons, maybe those were more important. I would never label them as "meant to happen" because no one is "meant" to be a victim, but maybe my new fire is more useful in the long run, if only i can figure out how to burn the right things.

i interacted with wicca first, but it wasnt enough. there was never enough. it was never what i was looking for, even before I knew what that was.

but I talked to the the earth, the air, the devil, and at some point between 18 and 19 Loki started talking back. and maybe adhd and autism made self teaching hard. and maybe my actual doing is hindered by both and by never having enough to feel comfortable.

and maybe comfort itself should come from doing instead of thinking. maybe I still dont quite know what path im being pushed toward. My family is the epitome of watered down white catholicism. our abilities are hindered by removal from time and place.

but my aunt could see things before she pushed it away and now she is trying to find it again. to take back control of forces she lost control of once and have plauged her life since. or maybe she was never in control of them. maybe control that should have been passed down was foresaken by certain ancestors generations ago.

im not sure. maybe i will ask them one day.

but I know that it came when I was eight and I always come back to it no matter what I try. maybe thats not witch-fire as ive heard people calling it. My story certainly doesnt sound remotely the same as anyone else who speaks of it.

but it hasnt gone away and somehow i dont think its going to. i think im just going to have to learn to manage it. Loki acts on the fear of the unknown and while I dont know how i feel about doing that, not being a god or a spirit and all and having a lot more to to risk and lose, i do know im eventually going to have to figure it out.