#ive already got some theories cooking

[rubitheracoon]

Oh well see the cherubs alright

Sallie May is hot af, but it's also cute seeing the sisters together! Hope we get more shorts going forward! Maybe we'll even see the cherubs again ^^

[orcelito]

Messaging my group asking to reschedule our meeting we were planning for tonight bc I got a cog knocked loose and I think any more fucking socializing today will just about drive me insane.

[do-it-uncomfterbl]

Every Fallout 4 Companion’s Approximate Birth Year (Part 3/3)

CVRIE — 2076

I assume Miss Nannies went out of production when the world exploded.

Codsworth — 2077

His box is still in your house during the prologue.

He also mentions enjoying the “months” he’s spent with you, though he might mean since Shaun was born.

Nick — 2175

We know it was over a century ago, but it can’t have been too far prior to the Gen 3 rollout around 2227.

I think Nick is the older brother, because it makes sense to start by creating a synth with stored personalities before trying to make one that develops a personality autonomously.

Longfellow — 2223

This man is only in his SIXTIES, they are LYING TO YOU

The Children of Atom were full-fledged on the Island when Longfellow was young. Confessor Cromwell is the one who sent them to Maine.

But he couldn’t have become Confessor until the mid-2250s, because he’s only FORTY-FOUR in Fallout 3, and he had a background as a trader before that! AND there still had to be time for the Children to travel all the way to Maine.

So Longfellow was born in the twenties, had his sad backstory in the fifties, and is about 65 in Fallout 4.

Strong — 2230

Strong could have been anyone, but I think he was either a divorced dad who would’ve been an accountant in another life, or just Mayor McDonough.

Hancock — 2235

Is 53-year-old Hancock controversial? Let me cook.

There’s support for the theory that synth McDonough was created before the election in 2282. We can assume the human had full gray hair at that point, because synths don’t go gray. So he was probably in his fifties at least.

John was younger, but he can’t have been that much younger. So he was probably ghoulified in his late forties.

Deacon — 2245

If you accept the John D. theory, this does put him a little on the young side, but it fits.

Gage — 2251

There’s not much backstory from his teens up to 2286, and I’m tempted to believe it was a shorter period. But he has late-thirties eyes.

…Eye.

Cait — 2260

Her parents helpfully drew the line at child trafficking, so we have a good idea of her age. She was 18 when she went into slavery and about 23 when she left.

Some time later, she spent about three years at the Combat Zone. Assuming some buffer room between the two periods, I put her at 27 years.

Danse — 2261

He’d have lived in the Institute for awhile, then Rivet City, then the Brotherhood.

He was already a paladin in 2277, but Maxson says it took him “many years” to become one.

Preston — 2262

I don’t know what it is about him that screams 25-year-old to me.

He joined the Minutemen at 17, then had “a few good years” before 2282 when Becker died.

MacCready — 2264

He was twelve in August 2277, and at that point he’d been mayor for three years.

He became mayor at ten. So he’s got to be nearly thirteen at the start of Fallout 3, which would make him 23 in Fallout 4.

Piper — 2166

Nat seems 13 to me. 

If Piper is old enough to have taken care of her as a baby, but not old enough to have significant memories of their mother, 21 sounds about wright.

Curie — 2277

Glory escaped the Institute in 2280, and she and G5 had known each other for some time before that.

Ada — 2281

Jackson seems to have created her reasonably recently.

Dogmeat IV — 2285

I think he is ouppy:)

X6-88 — 2287. 

Yeah, I said it.

This man thinks he’s so evil but he’s an actual baby.

My reasoning is that he wishes he had been there to see the University Point massacre in 2286, but apparently wasn’t.

It makes the game so much funnier.

If he was born earlier in the year, he could have been trained in time for the Kellogg flashback.

Part 1

Part 2

[spookydreamscape]

(Big big spoilers to the new spooky month short again) OKAY I'll get into the most interesting stuff already

THE FORSHADOWING THINGS FOR ALL THE NEXT EPISODES MADE ME HYPERVENTILATE. I've went through all of them multiple times while putting the video in a very slow playback speed so I got my ideas and theories formed fresh

SO in the first fordhadowing scenes, it's definitely about episode 7 !! Most obvious part being those tree branches surrounding the edges of the screen, hinting at the next antagonist who we know is some sort of tree being.

SUSIE SUSIE WE'RE GETTING A LOT OF SUSIE IN EPISODE 7. FUCK YEESSS LETS GOOO FINALLY FINALLY IVE WNATED THIS SO BADLY ACTUALLY IM LOSING IT‼️‼️⁉️‼️⁉️‼️

Susie, Skid, Pump, Hatzgang all will be together at the Candyclub. Judging off the scenes where Roy has a smug expression and then Skid and Pump run away happily— Roy is gonna mess around with them around again, tricking them into going in the woods (It's definitely the woods okay let me cook). Then we see Susie being shocked, then they all get mad and start to fight, and clearly get mad at Roy for what he's gonna do.

Everyone (except Roy) then leave the frame too, and I'm guessing it means they'll leave to search for Skid and Pump in the woods! Roy then stands alone there, now upset (ROY CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT FINALLY. EPISODE 7 WILL DESTROY AND ALSO COMPLETE MY LIFE‼️)

THEN we get scenes of Lila and Jaune screaming at Kevin, clearly mad, while Jack and John are there too— I'm speculating that this means Skid, Pump, Susie, Ross and Robert will get lost in the woods, making Lila and Jaune very stressed obv and they try to get the cops to help and find the kids. They'll yell at Kevin because he was present in the whole fight between the kids, but he didn't do anything about it (NOT BLAMING KEVIN BTW just saying why I think Lila and Jaune will scream at him!)

The short frame of Jack holding something yellow, which COULD be Susie's scarf, makes me more sure of my theory

[chososcamgirl]

HEYYY SIGMA ALPHA IYAAA GMMM HRUUUU ‼️🔥🤗 DAILLYYY CHECK INNN TIMEEE YK ITT RISE AND GRINDDD 🐺🐺

IM SERIOUSLY LACKING IN MY ASKS RECENTLY SO IM SORRY ABOUT THAT POOPIE PLS DONT BITE ME 😖😰

IM SO GLAD WORK IS GOOD BUT TRY AND GET MORE REST ‼️🔥 U CAN DO IT I BELIEVE IN U ALPHA 🤞🐺

IM GONNA RETURN THE CHARGER TODAY (and hopefully buy some things 😈😈) BUT GIRLLL I DO NOTTT WANT TO PAY THAT FEE URNENRNR KINDA WISH I WENT BACK AND RETURNED IT BUT IT WAS RLLY LATE AND WOULD HAVE BEEN DANGEROUS AND A GIRL NEEDS TO GET HER PRIORITIES STRAIGHT YKYK⁉️

OKKK THOUGHTS ON LAST CHAPTER 😈🐺🔥

nadnndbMDNDNEISNSNDNE DNENENEKE FUCK DUXK FIXKKKK I KNEWWWW IT WAS GONNA BE MEGUMI THANK YOU QUEEN FOR NOT GIVING IN TO SUKUNA BECAUSE GODDDDD 😭😭🔥🔥 BUT OMFGG??? “‘YOU SURE YOU DONT WANT TO STAY?’” OH MY GODD I AM SATTT UGHH THE PET NAMES, PERSONALITY SWITCH, EVERYTHING OMFGGG I WOULD HAVE CLUNGGGG ONTO THAT FUCKING MAN OMG YHE CHOKEHOLD THAG THIS CHAPYER HAD ON MEEE UGHHHEHHEHEHESK

IM SUCHHHH A SLUT FOR CLINGY MEN PLEASEEE LIKE OMFG JUST FUCK ME ALR HWBEBEBSKENNEND TWEAKING RN CUS THATS LITERALLY SO 🤗😍🔥😚🤤 I NEED SOMEONE LIKE THAT SOO BAD KEND GNAWING AT MY ENCLOSURE AND DROOLING RN OMG THE WAY I WOULD FORGET ALL OF HIS RED FLAGS LIKE I GUESS YN IS STRONGER THAN ME AFTER ALLLLLL WNNENEN AND THE FACT MEGUMI WAS WAITING FOR THAT TEXT OMGG ITS A NEED NOT A WANT 😍😍 ME AND WHO??? LIKEE WHENS IT MY TURN

the ai anon… I AM OUTTTT TO GET U HOW DARE U HO.. 👿👿 but iya.. ur writing is so fire you got your first allegation.. THATS HOW U KNOWW U MADE IT WHEN PEOPLE START ACCUSING U OF SHIT ‼️ guessing ai anon said that out of jealousy bc they can’t cook like you can iya but still.. ai anon i am OUT to get u 😡😡 the new chapter was SO FULLING KMFG IM FILLEDDD (in more than one way)

THANK YOU FOR BLESSING US ONCE AGAINNN IGNORE AI ANON THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THEYRE TALKING ABOUTT UR SO FYA 🔥🔥

toge running in on yn… omfg the way I RECOILED. Like I would just start digging my grave ON THE SPOT bc you KNOW I would never be caught sleeping with the ops (unless toge was the op but he would never be one 🥰😍🤗 [please let me hit im so desperate] “‘…but you owe me.’ There was a glint in his eyes, hinting at the mischief he always seemed to conjure.” OH OKAY 😍😍 WHAT WOULD THE FAVOR BE⁉️⁉️ 🤤🤤🔥

Maki going straight to yuta after the fight… OKAY GIRL GET UR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT 😭😭 how is this man still a side hoe/fwb I’m FUMING for him LMAO someone get them tg already ‼️

Sjap toge ily please marry me 🙏🙏 i can provide a good sense of humor, cunt, and lipgloss please give me a chance 🤤🤤🤗🤗🥰

CANT WAIT FOR NEXT CHAPTERRR DONT FEEL PRESSURED TO RUSH GIRL THE EDGING KEEPS US UP 🤗😍‼️

Sigh.. guess who’s ovulating.. on their own.. on a weekend.. ALONE… cramping… 💔 (hint: it’s me) UGHH I HATEREE BLEEDING MY PUSSY OUTT ESPPP WHEN I GET JT ON MY SHEETS. I WOKE UP TO A MURDER SCENE. ON MY WHITE SHEETS. WHITE. SHEETS. I’ll never recover from this 💔 BUTTTT I means I’ll be period free for the next month!! And that includes HALLOWEEN WEEKENDDDDD SENNENDNEN 🔥‼️ im doing matching costumes w my friends but we don’t know what yet 😭

I HAVE MY AMBASSADOR MEETING TMRWWW GANG WISH MY LUCK ‼️🤗

LYCHEE⁉️⁉️ OMG I LOVE LYCHEE.. THE OLIVE THEORY.. WERE SOULMATES 😍😍

MY HOT TAKE… I HATE DR.PEPPER.. IVE TRIED SOOO HARD TO LIKE IT BUT IT JUST TASTES LIKE CHERRY COUGH MEDICINE 😭🔥

OKOK QOTDDDDD… WHATS A LIFE HACK YOU SWEARRR BY ⁉️⁉️🤞

HOPE U HAVE AN AMAZING DAY/ HAD AN AMAZING DAY ‼️‼️ ILYSMM BYE SIGMA 😈😈

- 🐺

HI ALPHA!!!🐺🐺

NO UR SO OKAY!! i’m getting to ur ask now i promise ill be on top of them more as well😓😓 THANK YEWWW im feeling much better now so im happy <33

GIRL JUST KEEP IT ATP😭 do NAWT pay the fee🫵🫵 $40 is actually ridiculous and yes prioritise ur safety first over anything🙏🙂‍↕️

LMFAO IM GLAD YOU LIKED IT😈😈 sjap megumi is CLINGY. he was waiting for that exact text since they’ve met like and when he got it trust he was jumping up and down😏😏😏 sjap clingy megumi truther FOREVER 💯 also the ai anon I KNOW😭 eh i didn’t really bother w them i know they don’t mean any ill intent but it was just a weird ask to send like atleast don’t put urself on anon and face it but we ball🔥🔥🔥 thank you poo poo 🫂🫂 also i started calling my cat poo poo bc of you and i laugh everytime 😭😭😭

I KNEW YOUD LOVE THE TOGE BIT😭😭😭 fan service for you but omg the favour is going to be [REDACTED] so yeah🙂‍↕️ i NEED to write a sjap toge spinoff after i finish this one i just cannot i know it’ll eat so hard🗣️ YUTAMAKI TRUTHER FOREVER (i still love nobamaki too tho)

NAUR NOT THE WHITE SHEETS😭 omg when i hate when you can physically feel it come out of ur pussy like omg it’s like SUCH A GROSS FEELING EAUGH. BUT YESS HALLOWEEKENDDDD i’m supposed to go my co workers party but idk if i want to LOL i still have no friends in this city besides my co workers but idk i’m content rn i know uni is starting next year but that’s not until 6 more months😭 but we’ll see

YAYY I HOPE IT WENT WELL ALPHA‼️‼️ I KNOW U DID GREAT <3 OMG THE OLIVE THEORY😍😍😍 yes we r soulmates… ive never tried dr pepper mainly bc we don’t have it here so i wouldn’t know😭😭😭

AOTD‼️ IDK MANY BUT the post used one i do is putting a wooden spoon over boiling water so it doesn’t overflow (idk if that counts but yeah) HBY🫵

THANK YEW ALPHA!! I HOPE U HAVE A SUPER SIGMA DAY!! <33

[cyanlastride]

the colorado kid has torn through my mind over the past several hours

i was scrolling through tv shows i could watch when i saw haven. my parents watched haven when i was younger, and i remember bits and pieces of it. i was surprised, however, to see stephen king mentioned in the show summary. i read my first king book, the gunslinger, long after my parents finished haven, and before the gunslinger i really had no interest in king. now, even though ive still only read a handful of his books besides the dark tower, i jump every time i see his name, or anything nineteen.

i watched the first episode of haven with intent for the first time, and after something like 6 ad breaks decided that tv was not worth my time. also, though the show was interesting it didnt feel like king, other than it being set in maine. obviously i am no expert of what does and does not feel like king as i swore that donnie darko was a king adaptation when i watched it recently, but whatever. a quick wikipedia search confirms that only the setting and the idea of the colorado kid are king-inspired, along with a couple of references to stuff like IT. still havent read or watched IT. at the end of the day im a dark tower fan, not a king-horror fan, and surprisingly the fanbases have relatively small overlap. anyways, while im on wikipedia, i decide to quickly check out the colorado kid page.

and of course, my eyes immediately spy out the words dark tower.

"The review of The Colorado Kid in today’s issue of today's USA Today mentions that there was no Starbucks in Denver in 1980. Don’t assume that’s a mistake on my part. The constant readers of the Dark Tower series may realize that is not necessarily a continuity error, but a clue."

and just like that, im hooked. you see, im the type of nerd that grinned like a fool when i noticed the name of the bus company in the dr sleep movie. i love finding the little references and connections to the dark tower, so much so that the entire reason why i bought and read fairy tale was because i thought the staircase on the cover looked like the eye of the crimson king. the dark tower reference ending up being much more mundane in that book, but i still enjoyed myself.

so i wasnt able to sleep because i want to find my special little dark tower easter egg just for me oh boy oh boy, and now ive spent at least that last 4 hours starting and finishing the colorado kid which has left me unable to sleep because i cannot stop trying to come up with theories and trying to figure out how the fuck a starbucks existing in denver in 1980 when the first one didnt open there until 1992 on our/kings(?) level of the tower has any fucking relevance to the colorado kid who we already know exists on a different level of the tower to kings level because im assuming the forwards/afterwards are canon like they are in the dark tower books.

also, completely separate to the dark tower relevancy discussion, my main question about the colorado kid is as follows: where the hell did he get the steak from? either my man has been carrying around a cooked steak in his suit all day including into the fish n chip place, or he got it somewhere presumably after the ferry, so on the island? there cant be that many places that serve steak on the island, and with how the setting is described i find it unlikely they wouldnt be able to track down a witness who remembers an out of towner ordering a steak to go. so he was most likely given that steak by someone, someone who knew him well enough to want to give him a steak to eat with his bare fucking hands and then either purposefully doesnt speak up when he is found dead or never finds out about his death. im also willing to bet that the mysterious steak-bearing stranger saw and moved the colorado kid after he choked, because seriously if you were sitting enjoying some steak on the beach cuddled up with a trashcan one why are you rawdogging your steak next to a trashcan two when you start choking are you not going to attempt to stand, or lean over, perhaps over the trashcan, to attempt to choke out your steakbit? let gravity do some of the work, and right into the appropriate receptacle no less? like seriously my man mustve been going through something when he started choking on his steak he just sat there chilling, completely unbothered. if he was in any normal "ohgodhelpmeimchokingtodeath" position when he died he shouldve been face first in the sand. so yeah the colorado kid one hundred percent met with someone who gave him a steak, watched him choke on it, and then sat him up against a trashcan and just left.

maybe it was one of the furries or vampires or whatever. they were having some sort of fancy dinner when jake and callahan showed up, right? was that steak or human? also i seem to remember their little "come watch the humans fuck up their world lol hehe 9/11" teleport door hallway having something to do with russian currency, not sure what the connection is there but my brain seems to think theres something.

last thoughts before i give up for the night: not bothering to factcheck this but i think the dark tower series was completed in 04 and this book's afterward was dated 05 so the whole of the tower is potential context here. also the stand is one of the few other king books ive read and i think boulder colorado is important there too? its either the target city for the good survivors or the place where the sheriff comes from, i think? or maybe its the city the katet passes through in wizard and glass? i dont remember anymore my memory is awful and its late. if the kid ever went todash we at least know he started and ended on the same level of the tower cuz of his wife. the starbucks thing is bothering me too, like why is it significant that hes on another level of the tower, and one thats so similar to our own like they have starbucks during the cold war but with the way they talk about airplane regulations im assuming 9/11 still happened so it cant be that different. im starting to think that king just said that to turn people who were miffed about colorado kid onto the dark tower to increase sales or something but he posted this on his blahag so like i really doubt that.

im boutta pass out, damn you king, damn you colorado kid

[glsneeg-enthusiast]

id like to argue. says tumblr user glsneeg-enthusiast. the "previous hero" thing for sneeg is really a. normal theory. given his whole dialogue about charlies cooking game. but i think personally itd be more interesting if he just. wasnt. you know. anyway i have this idea that showfall just doesnt like him. based on the whole Thing with frank. and also connecting back to the cooking game ive noticed that sneeg is the only one who actually eats anything aside from charlie and then he literally gets cannibalized by charlie and the creature at the end of ep1. theres something about sneegs character and food trust me. which leads to frank i think sneeg ate frank in the cage. he says charlie doesnt visit him which means charlie wouldnt bring him food. and charlies a cannibal right so why would he bring sneeg food when franks right there. and all the sneeg frank stuff is a different post itself i need to get back on track. anyway. i do think sneeg is a violently important character for the plot and story itself. if you dont delve into it he doesnt seem like it but i do think he is. in episode one you get all the frank stuff but also he does really add to the "showfall taking children in" theory because of the things he says like not being able to read or write. and if you Really look into it he acts more like a child than the normal "unwilling sidekick". in the evil sneeg fight you get the relationship between him and charlie. anyway he gets eaten at the end of ep1 you can tell because of the chewing noises and the fact that his hats in charlies stomach next episode. he was horrifically important in episode 2. the bad hat scene was Violently important to show how easily showfall could control everyone and how determined sneeg was to get out. and hes incredibly smart he knew to say the thing that would be too gross to have happen on live television and he knew exactly the way to get out he just didnt have enough time. and the hats are actually sewn into his head confirmed by sneeg himself which is some meat for thought. anyway after that hes the only one that consistently eats in the candy room and Enjoys it (vinny instantly spat out the candy and said it was disgusting) which connects back to my Glsneeg Food Motifs. anyway you can see how brainwashed he is in the rest of the episode with how he doesnt react to anything like austin does. he spells out "already dead" in the wardrobe room and his dialogue shows that he doesnt care about dying. and i dont think he "fucked off" at the end of episode two i think he reasonably held austin back either because he was being controlled or because he knew ranboo had to be the one to get out because its already established that hes smart and has some sense of whats going on. in episode three he dies to security at the exit because of ranboos actions. this again shows that he knows what hes doing and hes conviced to get out and he was literally two inches from the exit. he got there while running from security which means he knew exactly where it was and how to get there. everytime he died it wasnt ""useless"" like the carousel crew. sneeg was actively used as a discardable thing to get ranboo further into showfalls horror. killed by the creature so ranboo wouldnt be, killed himself and austin so ranboo could go on, killed at the exit to give security enough distance from ranboo (and charlie) so that it wouldnt immediately kill them. and if you were to really dig into it sneeg could be another telling of how gay characters and people are treated. people have had the idea of "being gay is a stepping stone to being attracted to inanimate objects and worse things" which. like its right there man. especially if you take into consideration showfalls homophobia and how austin was treated. and i could go into so much more about sneeg and frank but ive talked too much i have so much more thoughts all i do is think about him but i cant keep rambling like thjs

hii i saw your thoughts on glanboo and thought they were interesting. do you have any for glsneeg?

I hate to say that I have SIGNIFICANTLY less but honestly I could see Sneeg falling into similar shoes as hetch

I REALLY wish he didnt just kind of?? Fuck off at the end of s2. In some ways it feels like him or ranboo could have fallen into the role of “the hero” and its entirely possible that sneeg did but maybe failed the first act of the story

Ive seen every version of gl at least once and unfortunately sneegs character is just a tiny bit too lacking to form any strong opinions on but also not mysterious enough like someone like hetch to go insane with theories. He DOES rank 3rd on my favorites list though and I have :) plans for him :) in my aus once i figure out how to tie up the dozens of loose ends tse/tfc/vhs left

Side note i do like to imagine the way he views things is more like vhs. Just flashes of everything being real and probably being more aware of the cameras and such. Maybe thats part of why the company opted to just use him as comical relief and lock him up any time he isnt on camera…

[daybreakrising]

okay, finished acts III and IV today. thoughts under the cut

i've already touched on my thoughts regarding act III: boring filler, dull af, too many 'walk, cutscene, walk, cutscene, walk-' elements, not enough actual story or useful information, hate hate hate c//itlali: she just fckn annoys me and her voice is grating AF bc 90% of her dialogue is either yelled/shrieked or the tone of it is just obnoxious and harsh to listen to-

act IV, thankfully, was much better. it is so good to see actual consequence happening on a large scale when we're dealing with war. i//nazuma should have been like this. that entire section of going place to place to fight back the abyss and seeing corpses of people and saurians scattered everywhere was exactly what it should have been like, and i'm glad they went there. war is brutal and it was nice to have that shown in game beyond "oh this one npc we met for five minutes is dead" (rip teppei)

i did really enjoy that entire section too - yes, it was a little repetitive but that's to be expected given the context of what we were doing, and there were some unique elements here and there with the npcs we interact with etc so it wasn't too stale for me by the end like endless combat stuff would usually be. the map slowly getting covered with purple fog and the markers slowly changing to "come here and you'll die" really added an element of threat and danger. & it was so weird but also so great to be working alongside f.atui npcs too lskdbgkfjnh love those reluctant allies-

my one complaint about it was that you couldn't pause. normally, when a quest has that restriction / is going to take a long time, the game tells you this and suggests you make sure you have enough time to complete it. now, unless i missed it somehow, for some reason this part of the quest didn't have that - and i ended up having to rush through some dialogue scenes because i had to go out and couldn't pause the fucking quest without risking restarting shit. i know there were a few "door of resurrection activated" pop up messages throughout so presumably it saved it in stages so you wouldn't have to do the whole thing from scratch if you did have to quit the game, but.... would have been nice to have the warning. (again, i might have missed it, but i don't remember seeing anything like the usual pop-up message on screen from previous quests involving a similar mechanic).

capitano lore? great. i gotta admit, the reveal of his identity (to an extent, as we still don't know everything-) was a tad disappointing for me, just bc i've seen so many really cool and interesting theories over the months/years, and the truth just... felt a bit eh in comparison, BUT still very interesting to know - and made me squint a lil at a certain mr boughkeeper (tell me your secrets, dain-). very interested to find out more after these reveals (also, rip to my menogias au that i never got to use-)

the last two 'heroes' were pretty obvious from the start, considering the tribes and the characters we've been introduced to. still undecided on how i feel about o//roron as a whole but his weird soul deal is definitely curious. c//hasca.... eh. i don't dislike her, but i also don't exactly like her. i don't really have any feelings regarding her, strong or otherwise. and tbh.... i'm so tired of the 'power gets awakened when loved one dies' trope, especially when said character is already the 'tragic backstory' kind. loved the consequence of war, hate how that one in particular was used. (at least we now know why she got the unique npc/potential 4* design but no visible vision-)

some nice world lore reveals in this act too - of course, honourable mention to the visual confirmation of the fake sky deal. very interested to see where that goes from here. and the cinematic cutscenes, as always, were fire (pun intended).

and now... we wait until 5-point-fucking-3 for more. hyv, you better be cooking something real fckn good-

[happiiest]

😔

[thehollowprince]

Slightly random TFATWS question here, but I'd be interested in your take on it. If the point of the supersoldier serum is that it essentially amplifies your existing qualities and makes you More of what you already were - as Erskine says, good becomes better, bad becomes worse - then how would you say it's affected Bucky? His actions as the WS were the result of Hydra's brainwashing, not the serum, and he doesn't seem to be affected by it in the way Walker or even the Flagsmashers are.

It's difficult to say for a variety of contributing factors.

Factor #1: Steve Rogers (and Johann Schmidt)

It's important to remember that both Steve and Red Skull were the only two that got Erskine's serum directly. And, if Schidmt got the same style of treatment as Steve did, then they were both the only two that we saw who got multiple doses of the serum, as seen below...

Steve was also the only one we saw who got the combination serum + Howard Stark's Hottie Machine, so we don't know what effect that tech might have had on administering the serum.

Every other person that we saw (or didnt see) had a single dosage of a modified serum - an attempt at recreating Erskine's original success. Such as, the Flag Smashers...

... or John Walker...

... or even the five other Winter Soldiers.

The only exception to this that I can remember was Emil Blonsky from the Incredible Hulk (I know we all try to forget that movie), because he had multiple doses over multiple treatments of whatever version of the serum Ross had cooked up trying to recreat Steve Rogers and Bruce Banner.

And much like Steve (and presumably Johann) it required extra steps to administer than just a shot or an IV drip, relying on Gamma Radiation to help "complete" the process.

The bottom line here is that, there have been no two versions of the serum that were the same that were administered in the same way. Steve Rogers was a unique occurrence in more than one way.

I also have a theory that the original serum was derived from the heart-shaped herb from Wakanda, given the similarities between the two when it comes to the enhanced physicality.

Maybe Erskine and Schmidt got their hands on an herb and refined it until it was just the physical (blue), excluding the more mystical attributes (red), such as the aspect that allowed Wakandan kings to communicate with their ancestors. (I have a theory about the heart-shaped herb, too, but I'll save that for another time)

It's also very important to remember that the only super soldier to experience any kind of major side effects was Schmidt.

No other super soldier looked like this

Factor #2: Hydra

Aside from the fact that Bucky didn't receive the same super soldier serum as the others, but whatever concoction that Zola managed to cook up in his attempt to recreate the serum (interesting to note that Schmidt seemed to take a more hands off approach to this, choosing instead to focus on the Tesseract and it's capabilities). As such, Bucky, as we saw him in The First Avenger, didn't exhibit any of the enhanced physical capabilities (or even an enhanced physicality) that Steve did after his experiment. In fact, the only evidence we have to confirm that Bucky had received some version of the serum was the fact that he survived the fall from the train, which we didn't get confirmed until The Winter Soldier.

The combination of Hydra having Bucky for over seventy years and him not presenting any attributes of the super soldier serum until after all says to me that he went through more experiments once he was back in their care, possibly some of the precursors to what they did during the Red Room and Black Widow programs.

Factor #3: Psychological

Now this last one is just my hypothesis, which is what you asked for, but I wanted to get the other variables out of the way first.

My personal opinion here is that, despite what Erskine said, I don't believe there is a psychological aspect to the serum. It is purely physical. The psychological component to these experiments - how the recipients handled their newfound power - was down to the individual. Steve Rogers didn't go through any radical ideology or personality shift. He was the same scrappy kid from Brooklyn who stood up to bullies and refused to back down from a fight, except now he had the muscle to back it up.

Same with John Walker, as controversial as that may sound. We had three whole episodes with Walker before he took the serum, and in that time, we already saw he was quick to anger and had aggressive tendencies. All the serum did was give him the power to back it up.

Earlier, he and Lemar were talking about what they could have done with the serum, saving their fellow soldiers, and we saw in the immediate follow up that Walker was trying to rationalize what happened, telling Sam and Bucky that he had to do it, that he killed a terrorist. That kind of mindset isn't something that can come about over night. That was something conditioned into him by the military, something he later shouted at them during his disciplinary hearing, telling them he was what they made him to be.

The Flag Smashers were fighting for what they believed in, for those the world forgot after the Snap (I refuse to call it The Blip, I'm sorry), and suddebly they had the muscle to stand up against those who would push them down.

Karli in particular was a scared kid backed into a corner, lashing out. Was a lot of what she did was wrong? Absolutely, but she wanted to send a message and used the only means that the governments hellbent on suppressing them seemed to understand. And, as we saw after that first bombing, this extremism wasn't shared by all the Flag Smashers.

It's like all those shows or movies or books where a mousy wallflower is given superpowers or turned into a vampire or werewolf and suddenly they have the power to push back against their oppressors. A great example of this would be the three werewolves introduced in season two of Teen Wolf, those being Isaac, Erica and Boyd, who all went from being shy loners to being cocky and arrogant because they had the power to stand up for themselves physically now.

You give someone power and you'll see who they really are.

To circle back around to the point I've been trying to make (sorry for the scenic route), it's that Bucky never showed any sign of extremism, whether for good or evil. And that had to do with a combination of who he was as a person - he was more or a follower, latching on to Steve and Sam as his guiding star - and Hydra's machinations and manipulations during his time as the Winter Soldier. By the time he was finally free of them, he just wanted to be by himself and deal (or not deal) with his various traumas.

The Bucky that we met at the beginning of The First Avenger was very quickly buried under war and tragedy. Who he was, because of what he went through, changed. And I think that was the point Erskine was trying to make, though he definitely could have worded it better. The serum makes you more of who you really are, shows your true colors, not because of any chemical response, but because of how power has been prioritized in society. The notion that you don't have to fear physical repercussions anymore, because who's strong enough to stop you?

[revenant-coining]

woah thats a lot of time :O but thats a cool theory !! im not good at math but if you were to put it into ratios im sure itll make more sense ooo jelly cubes sound good :O what kinds of foods do you eat here ?? pineapple sized grapes oh god those are big JFDLJLFK but ooo sounds good !! yeah thats fine if you cant remember !! ugh i wish it was like that on earth id love to go explore uncharted areas here :O i know the ocean is one of the most unexplored places but its not that easy to access sadly T__T /lh take the /j and make it /gen [/hj] ooo alright got it ahh i have so much information to document this is gonna be fun imma make a rentry >:] dang fates sounds so cool we love fate here !! i could never be that responsible DFJKLSJF /lh all i know about it minecraft ive never heard about terraria stardew valley or breathe of the wild but they sound fun !! what are they about ?? ohh so the chaotic energy is based on how you feel ?? like if you feel low on chaos would the chaos influx be low too ?? or would the chaos energy in general be low ?? ahh alright got it and ooo good theory !! id hope hasnt taken up that job sounds like she already has a lot to work with /lh yay !! :D ooo thats soo cool !! i love the balance of magic users :D yesss im glad were both thinking the same thing >B] ooo ill check out all of these games in my free time !! when im feeling more ghosty all i wanna do is stare at the ceiling on float around and turn invisible and become a spectator but experiencing things again in a new light is so much fun !! im already like that since im not cultured yet but yes soft things should be prioritized /hj woah im really glad heaven and hell isnt like what its percieved in this world it sounds so much fun being able to see different sceneries !! ooo what did the marble buildings look like :O yes lets goo i love the amount of free travel there is and good to know guardians could do that !! gonna ask the bodys parents whens the next time were going to a hotel so i can experience for myself B] ohh alright got it !! do you remember what their wings looked like ?? and yeah djklfjsd stairs are just so popular here considering transportation isnt as easy but so hell is mountainous and foresty and heaven is more city like right ?? ohh that makes sense !! yeah i can see how different attractions could look the same thats actually an interesting way to look at things mostly with others theres a lot of emotion that comes with those actions so thats where the difference comes from !! but hey im glad you seem okay with how you feel and interpret it !! :D - ramble anon

ok ratios: hell/heaven to my dimensions earth would be 1 month:1 week, my guess for this dimension's earth and hell is [some amount of years]:1 hour, or 1 hour:[some amount of years] (i am not good at ratios so i hope this helps somewhat)

in this dimension i eat fruit a lot, or salty snacks. I'm also a big soup fan. uncharted areas are sooo cool, i'd loved to explore the ocean if i wasn't scared of it /gen

yeah fate is very good at her job, and is very cool :D

terraria is sometimes described as '2D minecraft' but is has a lot more feature, items, enemies, etc. stardew valley is a 2D farming game with the ability to friend/date/marry npcs, like a farming simulator, mini dating sim, creativity elements, and resource gathering. breath of the wild is a 3D open world game where you can do lots of side quest, exploration, cooking and etc.

chaos being low causes me to feel low, not the other way around /nm and i meant sometimes i want to feel the extra chaos so i'd get closer to the source to feel it :]

the marbles buildings are similar to ancient greek architecture from this world! heaven's usually with smoother textures, and were very tall.

heaven beings usually had feathery wings, but they could come in any color, and were more like bird wings than angel wings. hell beings had more bat-like or dragon-like wings, scales or leathery. and yeah hell is mountainous and forest while heaven is a big city :]

I've spent a decent amount of time figuring out how i feel about romantic and platonic things, so I've been able to accept it really well :D

[gayspock]

brief star trek liveblog thoughts

im a little disappointed in the direction theyre taking alexander in, in ds9? dont get me wrong- im not even against the concept of it, you know? of him realising he was wrong, and wanting to rediscover his heritage, and feeling regret and having to deal with the consequences of a change of heart, so late... like i think that could actually be interesting to explore in theory. you know, since people dont find themselves perfectly first try and what you want/value as a kid isnt always the same as what you come to want/value as you grow older but its like...

despite all of that it feels off. i think its just bc alexander, in general, always just kind of... gets forgotten abt. and that sorta fits given how ticked off he is when he's first brought back. but nonetheless, like?? there's one or two good eps of him in tng, but literally its like when he's not onscreen its like he literally doesnt exist whatsoever ... and whilst i guess we are viewing this from worfs perspective, with the sudden change of heart happening offscreen, it still feels jarring and like it really doesnt align with the alexander we knew. like i dont think they explored it fully enough- exactly why alexander wanted to suddenly refind his heritage, as he got older. its like they just cooked up a justification for why he was there and thats it when... honestly as a mixed kid, pretty estranged from my own heritage, i know personally it runs? pretty deeper than that, yknow??? and its just- idk man... LIKE. we dont rlly get to hear alexander out properly, yknow.

and i think thts what a lot of my issues are with worf and alexander like. i really like them in theory but it does, a lot of the time, feel like alexander is literally just there to serve as substance for worf - when alexander himself has so much... potential there, yknow? but even when he does play a role in a story, its like.. never actually his story. its about worf dealing with his kid. in the same way all of miles/keiko stories are about miles, and his wife but not keiko like at all and its just like. -_- wahhh... SUCH a shame bc like ds9 was doing well with the kids, yknow?

like nog and jake- ive said already theyre really great, and i love them a whole lot. like thats genuinely quite hard to do. or at least most shows make it out like it is. like kids rarely... are done right ever, in my opinion, outside of kids' media. like a lot of the time its like: the parents' story and them trying to protect some walking cardboard cutout, thats too naive to know shit; or theres also those weird instances, where they try to make the kid seem super wise and weirdly mythical and its like... nah man just write them as little undercooked dudes like jake and nog. those are just two guys and theyre soooo good. a bit stupid but we literally are at that age its fine bc they nail down teenage stupid right and dont make them actual stupid yeah. and its like- with jake ESPECIALLY that makes sisko's love for him way way more real, you know... so much more heartfelt

[hectabdr]

Dragon Raja IV - Chapters 5 & 6 (Abridged)

Good evening (or morning, maybe?). Here are today's summarized chapters from the fourth novel.

Previous chapters (3 & 4)

For more source-material related stuff, check the new Index.

Chapter 5

Nono woke up in the backseat of a car. Initially she thought she was kidnapped, but by who?

Maybe the school infiltrated the Iris academy and took her prisoner, they must think she's a conspirator. She tried to remember her training, the first step was to stay calm, then, she had to analyze her surroundings. The bumps in the road and the speed indicated that she was probably in a highway. The weather belonged to a subtropical region and the strong tobacco smell was similar to...

-Your friend is a lazy-ass isn't she?

-Why would you say that?

-I gave her a sedative that should last at most 24 hours, but she's been sleeping for 30 hours!

...Finger!

She had managed to untie one of her hands already and now she wasn't afraid to reveal that she was awake. She used the rope to choke Finger and started beating both of them up out of anger. A police officer noticed their little exchange and ordered Finger to stop. Nono decided to play along, after all, this wasn't the right moment to put both of them in jail, despite how nice that sounded at the moment, deep down she wanted to believe Luminous.

The three were just entering to the city of Beijing and Nono agreed to help them begrudgingly. Finger's first idea was to search for Johann Chu's traces in the high school where he and Luminous studied years ago. Nono refused to get out of the car unless they bought her some clothes, since she was still wearing a night gown. Finger bought her a school uniform because there were no department stores nearby.

The place was heavily remodeled, now it had two statues in the entrance, one of which looked remarkably similar to Luminous. The school was holding an event that day and Luminous accidentally bumped into Chen Wenwen, his old crush. He thought he had erased her completely from his mind, but there she was again, and to his surprise, she was incredibly shy in his presence, blushing and stuttering, she even called him "Senior brother".

It wasn't only Wenwen, the rest of his literature club were acting the same way. Zhao Menghua and Wenwen were still dating in this new world, but he seemed extremely uncomfortable, it looked like he saw himself as second fiddle, he even stepped back to let the "old lovers" talk like some gentleman. Su-Xiaoyao, the school princess who used to compete with Wenwen for Menghua's attention before, now seemed to ignore the latter completely, she even called him "brother Mingfei". They were all there for a school anniversary event.

He found himself on the honorary lists as the highest ranking graduate and even as a basketball star, wearing the very same 'number 11' jersey that previously belonged to Johann. Luminous realized something, he had taken Johann's place in a world where he didn't exist. The statue in the school's entrance was actually built in his honor, it had his face indeed.

The principal asked him to give a speech to a crowd of admiring parents. It was raining, but people with umbrellas respectfully waited for him to finish reading the cards that the principal wrote for him. As the speech came to a close, he was surprised to see his uncle, happily applauding under the rain.

It had been two years since the last time he saw him, back then, he had an argument with his aunt and he never came back to Beijing after that. His uncle invited the principal and Luminous's classmates to attend a small celebration at the restaurant where he worked.

The party was a compliment fest for him, and as everyone got more and more drunk, Wenwen and Su Xiaoyao rested on both of his arms while Nono rolled her eyes. A little overwhelmed, he decided to leave momentarily and get some fresh air in the roof.

His drunk uncle reached him and tried to have a heart to heart conversation with him, with the occasional interruption to throw up in a corner. Most of the talk was centered around his future and the possibility of starting a career in China, the type of woman he'd marry and the life he hoped to have.

He turned back to say a few words but his uncle, along with the rest of the world, including the raindrops were standing still. In the middle of a paused environment, Ming·Z·Lu was siting in the shadows. In an illusion, he tossed Luminous a basketball, he realized he knew how to play the game, he was wearing Johann's Jersey and they had a brief match in the middle of the frozen rain.

Years ago, Nono made Luminous understand that, in life, choosing a door will always mean that another one is getting closed. When he chose to get on Johann's car instead of staying with Wenwen in the Aspasia restaurant, he chose Cassell over his previous life. Similarly, when Nono chose the Gattuso Family, she closed the door to Cassell. Ming·Z offered his brother to re-open this door.

For the last quarter of his life, Luminous could stay in his hometown and live the life of a local celebrity. He could date one of his former high school classmates, get a good job anywhere and drink with his uncle every week. However, Cassell would stay out of the picture forever.

Luminous asked if that meant leaving Johann behind. Ming·Z confirmed his theory, expressing that this world could only exist with his absence.

-He is my friend, if we die, we die together.

Angry, he caressed Mingze's hair right before pushing him from the top of the building, but the little devil paused his fall, floating in the air.

-I'm not a devil, brother. I'm a monster. We're all monsters and one day we'll be killed by the righteous Ultraman!

He resumed the flow of time and fell down.

Chapter 6

Finger and Luminous carried his uncle back to his house. Luminous really wanted to avoid meeting his aunt, but she opened the door before he could leave. It was awkward for a moment, so he hugged her without saying a word. She let them stay in his old room, Luminous wasn't expecting to find the place intact. His aunt kept all of his things right where he left them for the last two years.

Finger used some encryption and redirection techniques to contact his girlfriend in Cuba, asking Luminous to give him some privacy. He left his bedroom through the window, and he started walking on the streets of his hometown, the rain had only gotten worst. Suddenly, a red Ferrari stopped by.

-Get in the car, pretty boy!

It was just like three years ago, when Nono picked him up from the theater in the same car. While Luminous and Finger where drinking with his former classmates, Nono was looking for clues of what happened to Johann Chu and borrowed a car from Shao, an old contact of her family. Luminous suddenly remembered something.

Years ago, Johann's adoptive father organized him a birthday party. Since Johann didn't have any friends at school, he left an invitation in every club. Those were like golden tickets for the girls and Chen Wenwen decided to assist herself. Since every club had to bring a gift, she asked Luminous to collect some of the club's top literary works and deliver them to Johann's house during the party.

When Luminous arrived, he noticed everyone was socializing while the birthday boy grilled chicken in the corner. He looked lifeless, almost like a cooking robot. He passed the gift to Wenwen who thanked him and closed the door, leaving him outside. He walked back home and that was it. Thanks to that, Luminous knew where Johann and his mother, Su Xiaoyan used to live.

When they arrived, he recognized the house maid. Johann mentioned her a few times. He asked for his classmate, but the woman mentioned that there were no children in the house. He then asked for Su Xiaoyan, and the maid told him that she was in the hospital. After obtaining the name of the clinic from an envelope in the mailbox, Nono asked him to get in the car and they left the house.

The Sacred Heart Renai Hospital was surprisingly isolated. Since Nono was wearing a school uniform and it was the middle of the night, they made up a story: Luminous was her older brother and their car got broken on the road. They were proud of their little story but the guard was asleep when they arrived. Luminous almost woke him up to explain his made-up problem before Nono stopped him and they sneaked in.

She gave him a guard uniform that didn't fit very well and he searched for Su Xiaoyan. She was peacefully sleeping in her room and Luminous sat next to her. When she suddenly woke up and wondered why he was there, Luminous simply explained that he was covering up for a nurse, since the clinic was short on personnel and she surprisingly went along with it.

Without mentioning her son's name, he told her the story of Johann Chu, his missing friend, going through every detail, hoping that some of it would resonate with her.

The story successfully brought Xiaoyan to tears, but Luminous's sudden excitement was short lived, as said tears were not born from painful memories, but from deep felt sympathy. She said she was pregnant, hoping her future child would be as good as the guard's missing friend. Terribly disappointed, he thanked her, said goodbye and left the room.

Outside, Nono was waiting for him holding an umbrella. His eyes said everything, trying not to cry and to stay optimistic, he asked himself if anyone would look for him in case he disappeared as well.

-Finger loves you very much, he would look for you from every corner of the world.

If that Johann Chu is real, he would find you, you seem to care for each other very much.

Maybe Caesar would look for you too, he would take good care for his godson, no doubt about that.

...And if none of those useless guys managed to find you, even if you're deep in the gutter, I will bring you back.

Nono dropped the umbrella and gave her former sidekick a strong hug.

[lunariasilver]

The Virtuoso - 4. Meteor City IV

Masterlist

Previous / Next

A/N I'm sorry guys, the ending of this chapter kicked my fucking ass. I've been sitting on it being almost done forever.

After the troupe left, I started composing a song for them. I wasn't sure why. It wasn't like I was going to be able to play it for them but...it provided me with some peace. It reminded me of them. It wasn't just them that playing my violin reminded me of, though.

Every time I looked at it I remembered my grandfather. My mother, my father...my brothers. It made me want to tear it apart.

I wouldn't, though. My father always told me I was a sentimental fool, and he was right.

The music it made was nice, at least.

Inspiration had struck me in the middle of the street and I was working on a random stanza. Eventually I was going to have to put all of these parts together, but for now I just kept coming up with more pieces. I couldn't help but wonder if they would ever fit together.

I was interrupted by a familiar face. I couldn't quite place it at first, though.

"Give me your violin!" She demanded, standing in a threatening manner.

I stared at her blankly.

"Now, or- or I'll kill you!" She continued.

Oh, that's right. Zara. The girl I made lead me into the part of the city that people actually lived in.

"Why?" I asked. I was still positioned to play as if her presence made no difference to me. It didn't really.

"I'm- I'm gonna sell it!" Zara yelled. The woman was practically shaking. How tedious.

I tilted my head to the side. "To who?"

"Um-"

"Nobody here would ever buy this. Nobody can play it." I paused. "Why do you want it?"

Zara faltered, lowering her fists and looking at the ground. "Y-your music is beautiful. I thought that...maybe I could make it."

It remained silent. She was still trembling. She probably thought I was going to kill her. I was considering it. She did threaten me, after all...

"Would you like me to teach you?" I offered, surprising even myself.

-

-

-

After that, more and more people began approaching me asking for lessons. They started trading with me for them.

It was almost like I was an actual musician holding classes. After a while, people started trading violins to people. I assumed they bought them with whatever money they made working for the mafia.

I saw the mafia often. Well, their runners. It was strange how many jobs they were doing recently. They'd come to me a few times to ask me to handle a job for them. I obviously could never complete them, but I could at least point them in the direction of somebody who could. After the fourth time of me doing that, they started to come to me first. They even payed me. Jenny was no good to me, so I gave them a list of things that would work as payment.

I couldn't wait to discuss my new books with Chr-

Oh.

Right.

-

-

-

I was in the middle of teaching a class when I felt a familiar presence. It had been two months since I had last felt it. I almost dropped my violin I whipped around so fast-

"Chrollo?"

"I hadn't even said hello yet." Chrollo said, seemingly amused by my quick response to his presence. "What's this?"

My class was unnerved, but seemed to trust me to protect them from the former resident. "I'm teaching them to play the violin."

"How domestic."

I pursed my lips, trying to hide how truly pleased I was to see him. "I have to do something while you're not here." I then turned to face my class. "An old friend of mine is visiting. Class is over for today. Your next lesson will be free. I apologize."

They grumbled a bit, but they knew better than to kick up a fuss. When they were gone I turned to face Chrollo.

He was still smiling. "I brought you some books and sheet music."

I wasn't quite sure what to say to him, and I think he could sense that.

"I also brought food."

And those were the magic words. "What food did you bring? Is it cake? Cookies? Pasta?" I asked, advancing on him quickly.

His smile seemed to grow warmer at this. "You'll have to find out."

I narrowed my eyes. "Let's eat now."

"So impatient."

"Come on!" I demanded, grabbing him by his free arm and dragging him with me. When we got to my "residence" I paused for a brief moment.

"I-" I started, staring at the ground for a moment.

"Yes?"

I shook my head before dragging him inside. "I'm gonna have to read the books before you leave. So we can discuss them."

I didn't think you'd come back.

-

-

-

I was less sad when Chrollo left again. After all, this time I knew he'd be back. All of them would be back. They had no reason to, but they would. Just to visit me.

How strange.

The song that I had been composing with them in mind was so much easier now. I could hear how the puzzle fit together. It all started making sense to me. It had to be perfect, though. I couldn't count the amount of times that I had scrapped an entire section. Chrollo had given me a notebook that I was using to write it all down. I couldn't risk losing any of what I had already come up with. Maybe one day I would play it for them all. I knew Paku at least would like to hear it.

Time kept passing me by. Members of the troupe visited from time to time, usually by themselves. Sometimes they visited in pairs, but never all at once. That was fine with me.

Any time they got a new member somebody came to introduce them to me. Apparently Chrollo wanted there to be a total of thirteen members. I wasn't really sure why. (I mean, I had an idea, but he had never actually told me.) It kind of stung that I couldn't be a member, but I understood why. What use could I be to them if I couldn't leave the city?

Still, they clearly cared about me, and that was all I really needed.

Meteor City was starting to feel more like home. My thoughts didn't turn to Zoldyck Manor nearly as often as they used to. The people here were all fond of me. Or at the very least they knew better than to outwardly express their distaste of me.

I didn't "take care of people's problems" as often as I used to, since I was so busy with my classes, but I was still willing. Not to mention I had begun to serve as a liaison for the mafia. Honestly, aside from the complete and utter lack of modern amenities, Meteor City was quite comfortable.

I did miss having a chef, though. I still couldn't quite grasp the concept of cooking. Nobody had ever explained it to me. And it wasn't like I had an abundance of seasoning here.

....I missed good food so much.

-

-

-

Apparently the Troupe had gotten pretty busy as of late, trying to establish themselves in the greater world. They didn't have the time to visit me like they used to. It was okay though, I knew they hadn't forgotten about me. They still sent me messages from time to time, so I at least knew that they were thinking of me.

I tried not to think about how much I wanted to join them in whatever it was they were up to. That line of thought was dangerous. It might make me do something reckless.

I was laying on my pathetic mattress staring at a scarf that Paku had gotten me. It wasn't the actual scarf, it was a copy that I had conjured up. It had been quite some time since she had visited me. I missed her. I really wanted to see her again.

I closed my eyes, sighing heavily. Suddenly, it felt like I was falling, which was impossible.

My eyes shot open and I was standing in an unfamiliar bedroom. It was opulently decorated.

"What the fuck?" I muttered, looking around before I spotted a familiar face.

"Paku?" I questioned. She didn't look at me. She was currently cooking.

"Paku!" I tried again. Still no answer. "Pukunoda!" I exclaimed. It seemed she finally heard me as she whipped around to face me. Her gun was already drawn. She lowered it upon recognizing me, a perplexed expression on her face.

"Ivela? How did you get here?" She asked.

I looked around. "I have no idea. I was just holding the scarf you gave me and thinking about seeing you and then I was here." I shrugged at her. I had no real explanation.

Paku paused before nodding. "Ah. It must be your specialist ability."

"I'm not a specialist." I stated, raising an eyebrow at her.

She furrowed her eyebrows at me. "But you are."

That is not what my parents told me. "I must have developed a specialist ability, I guess." I was a conjurer.

"...I suppose." She said, seemingly unconvinced. "You'll have to figure out its limitations yourself."

I nodded. "I wouldn't expect you to have any insight."

I stayed and talked with her for a long while, quickly discovering that it didn't seem to have any kind of time restraint. That was good to know.

I figured out that going back was done much the same way as getting here.

I spent a lot of time figuring out my ability, which I decided not to give a name to. It seemed to tie into my conjuration ability quite nicely. I figured I'd just call it a part of "Gift Box."

In my defense I named my ability when I was young.

I found that I had to have been given a gift from somebody in order to visit with them, and I had to have chosen to use that particular gift within my Gift Box ability.

All of my Gift Box restrictions applied. When I was visiting someone, they couldn't see or feel me until I said their name. Their first or last name would suffice, I discovered, but it couldn't be a nickname.

Only they could see or feel me when I was visiting them. And I couldn't attack them, just the same as they couldn't attack me. I hadn't quite tested the theory on how my ability differentiated between an attack and innocent touching. That required further experimentation.

It was nice, actually. I could still see everyone without ever having to leave.

I could even see Killua.

He thought I was an imaginary friend.

I even checked up on my parents and grandfather from time to time. They seemed to be doing well, but I wasn't expecting them to be suffering. I was always careful to never make them aware of my presence, however. They didn't need to know what I was capable of. My luck they'd forbid it.

The time between the visits from the troupe grew ever larger, but it didn't really matter since I could visit whenever I wanted! I saw them all the time! It wasn't quite the same as seeing them in person, though. Apparently I felt different to them. Every time I visited Uvo he would throw something at my head. It would always just sail harmlessly through me. It was usually a can of beer.

He always looked so disappointed that I hadn't caught it. I think he was upset because now he couldn't drink the beer. (Cause it was all shaken up.)

The last time he visited the city he brought a keg.

That was a good time.

I barely thought of returning to Zoldyck Manor anymore.

-

-

-

It was almost like no time at all had passed before it was the second anniversary of my arrival to Meteor City. It was strange. This place was supposed to be a punishment, but it felt like anything but.

Which, admittedly, didn't make me feel as good as it should.

It wasn't like I had been falsely accused. I deserved to be punished.

I shook those thoughts away. It was better not to focus on them. The present was so much more pleasant than the past.

I hadn't been expecting it, but...the entire troupe came to visit me. I couldn't quite figure out why. It seemed like a strange thing to do.

I appreciated it, though.

Everyone around me was talking and laughing. I didn't know what about. Try as I might, I couldn't pay attention. I was too busy wishing it could be like this all the time.

I was too busy wondering what it would be like to really be a part of the Phantom Troupe.

I was too caught up in the realization that sitting here with all of them felt right in a way being with my actually family had never.

"When is your birthday, Ivela?"

I blinked. Chrollo was looking at me expectantly. Actually, they all were. I assume they had been talking about birthdays before and I realized they had no idea when mine was.

I made a split second decision.

"Today, actually. July 8th." The day I came to Meteor City. I didn't know why, but the day I was born a Zoldyck didn't feel like the right answer anymore.

The troupe were immediately in an uproar.

"Why didn't you tell us?!"

That seemed to be a sentiment shared by them all.

"Sorry, sorry." I said sheepishly.

"It's just a good thing we had a gift for you anyway!" Uvo exclaimed.

I narrowed my eyes. "Gift?"

"Hey! You weren't supposed to tell her that yet!" Nobu yelled.

"Uvo!" Chrollo said harshly.

The others also admonished him.

"We were gonna give it to her anyway!" Uvo defended.

Paku sighed. "The plan was to give it to her when we left. But I suppose now we don't have a choice."

I was beginning to think they liked giving me gifts because they felt bad for me, being cooped up here. That didn't bother me as much as it should have, though. Maybe people should feel a little bad for me. I have to bathe in a dirty river.

"I'm waiting with bated breath." I said blankly.

"We're gonna wipe that look off your face." Machi vowed. "Close your eyes."

I did as requested. If it isn't food I'm gonna be pissed-

I almost snickered at my own joke.

A moment later, I was told to open my eyes. Chrollo was standing in front of me holding a violin. At first glance it was nothing special. I was confused. I already had a violin, I didn't need-

Wait.

My eyes widened as I carefully took the violin from him. It was a Strandivari Violin.

Back when the world was my oyster, (so long as I obeyed,) I had taken a particular interest in valuable violins, for obvious reasons. This one in particular was...

Insane.

I looked at Chrollo with my eyes wide, and turned my gaze to the other members. They were all staring at me.

This was literally the most valuable violin in the world. This violin was...perfection.

I couldn't believe they'd stolen this for me.

Whenever my family had given me gifts, they'd always been practical. Any gifts that weren't murder related weren't gifts at all. They were rewards.

A dagger. A bottle of poison. A blade hidden within a bracelet.

Nothing they ever gave me was to create. Every 'gift' I received from them was a tool meant to help me do whatever they wanted me to. Nothing was ever chosen just because I might like it.

In contrast, the troupe had always brought me things that made them think of me. They brought me books. They brought me food, sheet music, scarves, clothes. Things to make me more comfortable.

Things to make me happy.

Things to make me smile.

"Ivela?" I heard Chrollo ask.

I blinked, registering that my eyes had started to well up. I blinked rapidly, trying to clear my eyes.

"Do you like it?" He asked softly.

I stepped back and regarded the whole troupe, as opposed to just Chrollo.

They were all staring at me.

I stared back blankly, before I smiled warmly. "I love it."

The uproar was immediate.

"What a pretty smile!" (I still hate Shalnark.)

"Ivela can smile?!?!"

"I DIDN'T THINK SHE COULD!!"

"You guys haven't seen her smile?" That one was Chrollo.

"You have??!?!?!"

I just kept smiling at the chaos I had caused, waiting for it to settle down. If anything, my smile was only growing wider.

I adored these people.

I snickered as the chaos only grew. They were being completely ridiculous. It was just a smile.

I pursed my lips and turned away from the Troupe. They quieted down immediately as I positioned my new violin on my shoulder.

"So. Do you guys want to hear a song?"

I didn't wait for a response, instead choosing to force them to listen to me play the song I'd written for them.

8 years passed mostly uneventfully.

After that first birthday celebration, the trend of me seeing the troupe in person less and less continued, although they all came for my birthday every year. Or...they did. Before my father came. Before he killed a member on my birthday.

(To be fair, he was unaware that it was my birthday. But still. To hell with him.)

I liked the girl he killed. She was kind.

He and Chrollo fought. My father didn't stick around to finish the fight. Of course he didn't. Chrollo wasn't his target.

I couldn't do anything. I couldn't even let my father see me.

After that, it was decided that the Troupe having a regular day where they're all in one place was a bad idea, even if it was only once a year.

I still saw them, but those get-togethers that I had so cherished were long gone. I started to get a little scrappy with everyone that I could. I had to be the strongest Zoldyck. At least for now. My training regimen was intense.

I met many people over the years, although only two of them were particularly memorable. They all inevitably left or died any way. Aside from those two, the only people I bothered to remember were my violin students.

I remembered a girl that I trained. She grew to be quite strong. So strong that when a butler from the Zoldyck estate came looking for a new apprentice, I sent her off with them.

Cruel, perhaps, but it was what she wanted. Besides, the family never did much to the butlers. They wouldn't treat her the way they'd treated me. She'd be fine.

The other....well. Ging was...well. Um. Hm.

He wasn't someone I liked to think about.

Some of my violin students managed to get out of Meteor City and make something of themselves.

Or at least I hoped they had. I only really knew that they had left to go join an orchestra or something. I try not to think about them either.

No, I have to stay focused. I have to keep running towards my goal.

I'm going to get out of Meteor City.

A/N

Okay guys once again I am so sorry. That birthday scene was something I had a very specific plan in mind for, and executing that was a struggle. (I'm pretty happy with it.) Plus I'm doing the school thing again, so...that isn't helping with writing time. But I'm not going on another insane hiatus! I promise.

Anyway, here we are! Next chapter we start the real story. Only took 5 chapters to get there, counting the prologue. Hope you guys liked the Meteor City Arc! IT WAS A LOT

Also, Ivela's violin is based (obviously) off of Stradivarius Violins. Her's in particular would be this world's equivalent of the Messiah Stradivarius. That's right guys the Troupe went all out.

They said "If we're stealing Ivela a violin, it's gonna be a VIOLIN."

Previous / Next

[litwitlady]

whoever is filthy, let him be filthy still (4/6)

Read on AO3. - A chapter ahead over there.

Warnings: mentions of murder and childhood abuse

iv. Max

‘And Max. He’s your brother? You were found together?’

Michael nods but frowns. ‘We’re brothers in theory, I guess.’ 

‘In theory? Explain that.’ Dr. Sampson hands him a cup of coffee and settles back into her seat. 

He shrugs. ‘He and Isobel were adopted together. I got thrown into the system. Once I returned to Roswell, we struggled - I struggled.’ He clears his throat and takes a sip of the coffee. ‘He can be a condescending dick. And as de facto leader, he pisses me off - a lot.’

‘Have you ever been close?’ Dr. Sampson has a voice that lures things from you - ugly truths that you never made a conscious decision to admit. To yourself or anyone else. Michael decides it’s her superpower. 

‘Once. Back in high school. Before all the lies.’

She smiles warmly, trying to soothe the answers loose. ‘I know you two aren’t blood related, Michael. And that your relationship is often strained. But do you still think of him as your brother?’

‘Only sometimes.’

***

Michael doesn’t immediately go to Max. He drags his feet for a couple of weeks and is happy to continue doing so, but Isobel has other ideas. She begins orchestrating reasons for family meetings - their doppelganger problem, Liz and Max’s emotional crisis, her desire to cook some new recipe. 

None of her plans work. Michael too stubborn and Max too oblivious. It’s not until Max unexpectedly climbs down into Michael’s bunker that avoidance is no longer possible. And he comes at the worst moment. Michael is already fuming - his newest calculations providing nothing but bad news. No matter how many simulations he runs. It’s frustrating, but not nearly as frustrating as when he’d run into Alex and Forrest that morning. At the Crashdown having breakfast, hands touching across the table. This time they had noticed him and he honestly wishes they hadn't.

‘Not in the mood, Maxwell.’ He doesn’t bother looking up from his worktable.

Max ignores him and slides a stool over, sitting far enough away that Michael can’t reach him. Already playing defense to Michael’s anger. ‘You’re never going to be in the mood for this, so sit down and listen.’

Michael laughs, bitter and sarcastic. ‘Fuck you, Max.’

‘I don’t want to be the leader of this anymore.’ He motions vaguely around the bunker.

That certainly grabs Michael’s attention. ‘Come to handover your letter of resignation?’ He sits down on his own stool and smirks at Max. ‘Because I accept. Long live Queen Isobel.’

‘Not Isobel, Michael. You.’ He’s looking at Michael through those big, brown puppy dog eyes - full of sincerity. Not a single hint of humor anywhere on his face.

Michael laughs anyway. ‘I don’t have time for this, Max. Go brood somewhere else.’ 

Max stays quiet but he doesn’t move. He watches Michael work for a long time. It frustrates Michael because it’s always been one of his favorite strategies. Wait him out until he crumbles - which Michael always does because Max can be a patient motherfucker once he digs his heels in and decides to be an asshole.

The air around them thickens and when Max clears his throat, Michael comes the tiniest bit unhinged.

‘Alright, fuck! Say what you came to say. I’ll listen.’ He only half means it, but Max seems satisfied enough. 

‘Sheriff Valenti confessed something to me a few months back. Something I’ve kept from you and Isobel.’ He stares down at his hands and grimaces. ‘I didn’t know how to tell you or what any of it meant or even who I was anymore. And that was wrong. I’ve been wrong about a lot of things, Michael. Especially with you.’

Michael rolls his eyes at Max’s melodramatics. ‘Spare me the contrition, Max. Just spit it out already. I have work to do.’ 

‘It wasn’t you in the group home who was drawing all over the walls. It was me.’ Their eyes meet over the table and a heated silence falls around them. Michael blinks slowly, not comprehending what he’s just heard. ‘I was the deranged, damaged kid. And I think I’ve known that all along.’ He shakes his head and breaks eye contact, staring back down at his hands.

More silence. Several moments stretching long between them. Finally, Max sighs. ‘Say something.’ Emotion straining his voice. Eyes welling with tears.

Michael continues to glare at Max. Not believing he has the audacity to cry. He tries to stand but it’s like he’s glued in place. And instead of his normal white hot rage, a calm coolness washes over him. Pooling in the bottom of his belly. Michael knows that feeling is hate. Pure, icy hatred. He’s not unfamiliar with the feeling - Jesse Manes, Kyle Valenti, Flint Manes, Noah Bracken. Sometimes the list seems endless.

‘Explain it better, Max. Make it make sense.’ Every word pushed through teeth clenched so tight he’s worried they’ll break.

The tension surges between them, the temperature palpably rising in the windowless bunker. Michael’s not sure he’ll hear anything Max says - not with the ferocious pounding in his head. Blood pumping through his veins like icy sludge.

‘All my nightmares as a kid - the times Isobel literally had to mind-walk me so I’d calm down. My obsession with the symbol - the way I’d doodle it over and over again in every notebook I ever owned. And then the tattoo.’ His voice cracks, high-pitched and frantic. ‘Now, with all that devil talk? Michael, I couldn’t have survived what you survived. I’d have killed more than some random pervert in the desert.’

Michael stalks towards him, fists raised. ‘Is that supposed to make me feel better? I was kicked around - slapped, beaten, burned. And that’s all supposed to be okay because you were safe? From yourself?’ A strangled noise rises from Michael’s throat. ‘I was never loved, Max. Not ever. Not once. All so you could be protected and loved, held tight by the perfect fucking family?’ 

He takes several steps forward, fisting the collar of Max’s jacket. The urge to wrap his hands around his brother’s throat throbbing in his fingers.

Max grips Michael’s wrists softly. ‘And yet, you are the most loving of the three of us. Of anyone I’ve ever met. And no that’s not fair, but it’s the goddamn truth.’ He pounds his fist on the table and Michael flinches, dropping his hands away and stepping back. Watching as Max’s tears finally crawl down his cheeks. ‘You’ve always had the most control - ever since we were kids.’ He throws his hands up in submission. ‘You’re not the murderer, Michael. I am. It always had to be this way.’

A manic sort of laughter overwhelms Michael. He can barely believe what he’s just heard. And by someone meant to love him. He turns his back to Max and moves as far away as he can. The rage inside him festering into something almost sentient. He closes his eyes and counts backwards from twenty - inhaling and exhaling around every number. Like Dr. Sampson had suggested whenever his anger tries to get the best of him. 

Michael can choose to take back control. To let it all go. Even if the other person doesn’t deserve such kindness.

And it works, mostly. Some of his tension drains away and the weight on his chest subsides enough for him to breathe again. He’s still angry - still furious. But it’s a low, simmering heat now - not the numbing white hatred that had consumed him earlier. His head is spinning with this sudden rewrite of his life and there’s only one person he wants to talk to right now. And that person is certainly not Max Evans.

Michael slowly turns around and shakes his head at Max. ‘I need time. Maybe a lot of time.’ He needs Alex. ‘I miss my brother. I’ve missed my brother for a long time now. But the truth is, Max? I don’t recognize you anymore.’

Max nods. ‘I get that. And for whatever it’s worth, I’m sorry.’ He starts to walk away but stops with one foot on the ladder. ‘I won’t tell Isobel yet. To keep her out of your hair for a while. However long it takes for you to process all this.’

‘I’ll tell her when I’m ready, Max. You don’t have to keep making all the decisions and putting in all the work. We can’t be a family until we’re all on equal footing.’ He moves towards Max. Not necessarily because he wants to - because he doesn’t. Not right now, anyway. But he knows that some future version of himself will want this. That Max needs this and Isobel. Maybe even Liz. So, he wraps his arms around Max, quick and tight. One sharp clap on the back. ‘Maybe take a trip to California.’ He pulls back. ‘I hear it’s nice this time of year.’

Michael returns to his calculations and Max leaves, already planning the best route to California in his head.

[fotiathymos]

would love to hear the backstory hcs regardless of them being sad or not :0

SIGH. 

I wrote a lot and it got eaten by tumblr and I'm upsetti so IDK if this is any good. Also this is just Lio's backstory stuff and his parents. I could do Galo but maybe if anyones interested I will?? And not tonight..

Its sad and its LONG. So just be prepared for that. Its also 2 am so no one will read this anyway so...

tw for parental death, kidnapping, stalking, genocide, government abuse, and if i miss something my apologies

Do note this isn't the end all be all for a Lio back story. I honestly love everyones interpretations. Mine tends to be sad and less cool and edgey I guess? Everyone makes it cooler, I just go.. oh heres some sad mixed with reasons for Lio's mental illness. 

DO REALIZE. PLEASE. REAL GENOCIDE IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW IN THE WORLD AND IS NOT COMPARABLE AT ALL TO ANY FICTIONAL 'RACE' LIKE THE BURNISH.

Okay.

Lio's backstory and his parents.

--

Lio is a powerful burnish. We know that. He has massive control of his flames and a strong connection to the Promare. It is a common theory that he awoken as a Burnish rather young. I share that theory. Lio became burnish around 8-9 years old. Very very young. Most children who become burnish are taken away, hated by the parents or killed/arrested by Freeze Force. Lio was loved very much by his parents.

Like Simon and Nia. Lio's parents were rebels. They grew up in a world where there wasn't any burnish. They witnessed the uprising, the first World Blaze, the oppression of the burnish. They were against it. They were not burnish themselves but they could not just idly sit by and watch people get murdered and kidnapped for something they couldn't control. Lio's parents joined the rebellion quickly.

His father being an inspiring man, friendly, loveable, a leader, and a beacon for the good of all man and Spiral kind. He was fond of pointy glasses, capes and inspirational speeches. His mother was kind, a bad cook but still tried, soft spoken and believes there is good in everyone. Lio got his attitude from his father, his soft spokeness from his mother. And maybe some magical pretty eyes and hair from his mom too.

His parents were anarchists. His father worked in a line of direct action. Fighting and pushing back against the government, rioting, sabotaging government burnish kidnappings, breaking people out of prison, etc. His mother pretended to play 'stay at home mom'. She worked with the community to build unity and strength within. She'd homeschool Lio to make sure he was not fed propaganda that was quickly over taking the education system. She owned a community garden and helped feed everyone. From a young age Lio was surrounded and taught to be kind and help others.

Unfortunately, Lio was an unexpected child in an unexpected time. The activism of his parents cause the young family and the young child to be targets of the government. Considering they werent burnish and no crimes could be found on them, Freeze Force just wanted the annoying pests to be eliminated. But killing a quiet family wouldn't look good on their part. They wanted to scare them out of activism, scare them into obeying the order. Lio became an easy target.

Strange men started to stalk Lio. It was quickly noticed by his parents and caused them to isolate their child from the world. Lio was a lonely kid, he wasn't allowed friends, couldn't go to the park and mostly stayed home with his mother. 

One day while playing in the backyard, Lio wandered off. His mother was keeping an eye on him of course, but kids are kids. And Lio was Lio and a rebellious kid. He wandered off into a stranger who was watching him from afar. Waiting for Lio to get far enough away to be grabbed. The stranger threw a bag over Lio's head and desperately tried to throw him into a van. Lio was young and small and scared. He was suddenly covered in flames. Burning both himself and the stranger. 

His mother who was already frantically looking for her child, suddenly saw flames appear in her backyard. She grabbed a hose and hosed them down. Only to see her child still on fire. She grabbed Lio, ignoring the burns and ran into the house away from the stranger. After placing Lio in the shower and calming him down, telling him he was safe, she quickly packed bags and left with Lio. 

The family moved to a new house quickly. The news never mentioned a man being burned by the burnish, but they couldn't risk anything.

They now had a burnish son, who was lonely, scared, paranoid and burning everything all the time. In their activism the parents grew to understand the burnish struggles and needs. Not to the extent of understanding completely as they were not burnish but they tried. They loved Lio and did everything they could to help him. His father would teach him to control is flames to make objects, from toys to animals to swords. His mother had him help with cooking, control the flames to not burn the food. They served many burned dinners either way. One day they walked in on Lio climbing into the oven while it was turned on. Freaking out, but suddenly realized he was fine. Lio's excuse was he wanted to see the fires. 

Lio would talk about how the fire spoke to him. How he needed to burn. It became a common thing of Lio bursting into flames just from laughing too hard or crying or just any emotion being felt a little bit too hard. His father always had a pair of fire proof gloves in his pocket and would pick up Lio and rush him into the shower to cool down. He could burn all he wants in the shower with no water, but if it got too much he was to turn it on and cool off. 

The house furniture had scorch marks in Lio's favorite spots. Lio's favorite books needed multiple copies because he'd get so excited from certain parts in the story he'd set the book aflame. He was to watch his mother garden from afar to not burn the plants. Lio learned to make fire that wasn't hot quickly so he could still burn in excitement or joy and not harm his parents or things.

His parents were still activist. Laying low but committed in making the world a better place for their son. His mother stayed home still to teach Lio as he got older. His father would do more secretive work but it'd cause him to not come home for days. They were still being hunted. And possibly even more so since information about their burnish son may be known.

Lio was 12 when he was home, staring into the fireplace, breathing with the flames. His father was out for work. His mother busy in the garden out front. A Freeze Force van pulled up. His mother quickly ran inside. "Lio, go hide. Now." But it was too late. Large men pounded through the front door and threw a bag over Lio's mother's head. Lio screamed for her and burst into flames. He tried to direct them at the men who now had his mother on the floor. But suddenly everything was cold. Lio was shot frozen. And blacked out.

Freeze Force arrested Lio. They told him his parents were killed for treason. Lio was to be experimented on. He never saw them again.

When he finally broke out of prison, he tried to go home. There was a new family in his house. They quickly called the cops on him and Lio ran. Lio was on the run for years. Joining and leaving groups of burnish, being on his own for some years. 

When he finally found the Mad Burnish, interacting with others was foreign to him. He managed to connect with Meis and Gueira only. They respected Lio's way of communication, no touching, less talking, more actions, more burning. 

Being on the run, with and without the Mad Burnish, made Lio never really have a 'home'. The only one he ever had was taken from him. After the Parnassus events, staying put or settling down wasn't in him. Lio continued to travel with Meis and Gueira to aid other ex burnish around the world. He'd come back to Promepolis every so often to stay in touch with Galo. They'd mostly call and video chat from afar but it was nice to see eachother after all they've been through.

It took Lio over a year to finally discuss his feelings with Galo. And even then, when they finally became romantically involved, Lio requested they 'take it very very slow'. Lio continued to travel and help others but started staying at Galo's apartment more. It took another year for Lio to finally call Galo's apartment... home.

When Lio finally opened up to Galo about what happened when he was younger.. Galo told him how proud Lio's parents would be of him. How he was still so kind, loving and helping others, just like his parents. How proud they'd be knowing Lio saved the world. 

--

Okay! That was sappy and i tried to end it nice??? I didn't proof read this... its 230 am... ive got insomnia so whatever but staring at a screen typing doesnt help nor did tumblr eating this post first and having to rewrite it.

Once again this is just thoughts. I'd love to know what anyone thinks. Ive seen much cooler more actiony backstories of Lios parents being ex mad burnish leaders or something. I just got sad. pft.

Thank you for reading if you got this far!!! Much love!! Hope I didn't make anyone feel horrible. GNIGHT!