#its so hard for me to be open about the things that have happened to me the last 2 years

[mminghaos]

best friend seungcheol whom you have a crush on, but never told him. he doesn't know it either and y'all just bicker all the time as bsf, one day all of it changes when you finally say you found a match on some dating app. he realises it and bam! hot and heavy shit go down.

bitter crush , choi seungcheol x f!reader

SYPNOSIS: your bestfriend doesn’t know you’ve had a crush on him for years, but when you mention matching with someone on a dating app, everything changes.

WARNINGS: smut, fingering, kissing, teasing, mingyu as the failed date lmfao

requests are open, do send some in!!

you’ve been friends with seungcheol since high school, watching each other grow up — first jobs, first kisses, and everything in between, sticking together through the highs and lows. your friendship is built on bickering and teasing each other like it’s second nature. but now, the bickering feels different.

“i matched with someone on that app i told you about,” you say, placing your coffee down on the wooden table of the café you and seungcheol are sitting at.

you’d decided to give a dating app a shot, hoping it would help you take your mind off seungcheol. maybe meeting someone new will help you move on, or at least distract you from the constant thoughts about him. but so far, it’s just more of the same — swiping, chatting, but none of its ever seemed to match the energy you share with him. you might as well move on, since seungcheol has is own hookups and girlfriends, and none of them will ever be you. its frustrating, the way this burning crush for him is always shimmering beneath the surface, gnawing at you. this is going to be the death of you — that’s what you always tell yourself.

“so you’re telling me you’re out here swiping on strangers?” he responds, his voice laced with something you can’t quite place. “what happened to the whole ‘not needing anyone’ thing?”

“it changed.”

“really? that’s weird.” he says, his eyes never leaving you. “thought you were too busy to deal with anyone new.”

you roll your eyes, trying to brush it off. “yeah, well, apparently im not as busy as i thought.”

you’ve never been the type to casually date or get involved with someone just for the sake of it. but lately, things feel different. seungcheol’s always been there — constant, reliable, and annoyingly perfect in his own way — and it’s hard to ignore how your thoughts always circle back to him, no matter how many times you try to push them away. you’ve never said it out loud, never let him in on the truth of how much he’s been occupying your mind, and the idea of dating someone else? it almost feels like a joke. you’re not really here for some random guy who doesn’t know you like he does. but the more you try to distract yourself, the more you realize how little it helps. no matter how many matches you get, no conversation ever seems to compare to the effortless back and forth you share with seungcheol. it’s like you’re chasing something that doesn’t quite exist, and each swipe only makes you feel more frustrated. but you can’t exactly admit that, not to him, not to anyone. so you keep trying, hoping maybe this time will be different, even though you know deep down it won’t be.

“so, who’s this guy?”

you shrug, trying to keep your voice steady. “kim mingyu. he’s nice. we’ve met a few times before, actually — works at that bar down the street.”

seungcheol leans back in his chair, his arms crossed as he watched you. he clears his throat. “just don’t pick some random guy who doesn’t get you, alright?”

“what, are you jealous or something?”

“no.”

the date with mingyu went well. you two got along really great — there was no shortage of conversation, and the chemistry was comfortable. you both enjoyed the meal and found common ground in ways that made the evening feel lighthearted and easy. it was nice, actually, to just relax and enjoy someone’s company without any pressure.

even if the date was good, you and mingyu both agreed that you should just be friends, neither of you feeling the sparks you were hoping for.

you walk into your apartment, slipping off your shoes and placing your keys under the mat. its quiet, the only sound being the soft hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. you head towards the living room, where seungcheol is sprawled on your couch, sorting through the groceries he offered to pick up for you earlier this week.

“you’re back early,” he says, glancing up with a smirk. “thought you were gonna be out all night with your… date.”

you roll your eyes, not really in the mood to talk about it. “it was fine,” you reply, shrugging as you drop your purse on the counter. “nothing special.”

seungcheol raises an eyebrow, clearly not convinced. “really?”

you let out a breath, trying to sound casual. “yeah, well, turns out i’m not as interested as i thought.”

he tilts his head, looking at you like he’s trying to figure you out. “what do you mean?”

you hesitate, leaning against the kitchen counter, fingers tapping against the countertop. “we got along, i guess. but we just decided to be friends.”

“huh.” seungcheol shrugs, clearly unconcerned, though there’s something in the way he watches you that makes you pause. “so you’re saying you don’t feel any connection with him at all?”

you shift, rubbing the back of your neck. “it’s just… not there. but whatever. i’m fine.”

“you sure?” seungcheol presses, his voice dropping an octave, and you can’t help but notice how close he’s sitting now. “because i’m sure someone else would love the chance to—”

“ugh, please.” you cut him off, trying to brush it off. “i don’t need some random guy to be interested.”

he smirks, clearly not buying it. “really? sounds like you do.”

you bite your lip, trying to hold onto your patience, but it’s slipping through your fingers. you know he’s teasing, and usually, you’d laugh it off, but tonight feels different. there’s a tension in the air that you can’t ignore, something that’s been building for years. frustration bubbles up inside you, and before you can stop yourself, the words spill out.

“cheol, i like you, okay?” you blurt out, your voice trembling slightly, surprised by how easily it all comes rushing out.

he pauses, his eyes narrowing slightly as he processes your words. there’s a moment of silence, and you feel like you’re about to suffocate under the weight of it. his gaze flickers to your face, then down to your hands, then back to your eyes, as if trying to figure out what’s really going on.

“wait,” he says slowly, his tone less playful and more cautious now. “you’re not drunk, are you? had drinks or something when you were out?”

you quickly shake your head, trying to steady your breath. “no, i’m not drunk. i just—” but the words feel clumsy on your tongue, and suddenly, you’re unsure of how to take them back.

“i shouldn’t have said that,” you mutter, your cheeks burning with embarrassment. “this was stupid, i’m sorry. i don’t even know why i—”

you start rambling, trying to downplay the confession that’s just slipped out. each word feels like it’s digging you deeper, and you just want to take it all back. “i mean, i don’t even know what i was thinking—this is—god, i’m so—”

but before you can finish, seungcheol pushes himself off the couch and walks towards you, stopping just a few inches away. his eyes still lock on yours. the silence stretches, and you feel your heart race, your breath catching in your throat. you want to say something, to apologize again, but all the words are caught in your chest.

“stop,” he says softly, his voice low, but there’s an intensity in it that you can’t ignore.

you open your mouth, wanting to explain, to take back the awkward confession, but the words jumble in your mind. “it’s just… i didn’t want to make it weird, and now i’ve probably ruined everything—”

seungcheol doesn’t say anything, just watches you with an unreadable look in his eyes, waiting for you to stop rambling. you go on anyway, trying to explain yourself, even though you can feel yourself getting more flustered with each passing second.

before you can continue, he steps forward, his hand gently cupping your face, cutting off your words. you freeze, eyes wide, but before you can process anything, his lips crash onto yours, effectively silencing you.

the kiss is deep and urgent, like he’s been holding back too. your brain barely registers what’s happening as your hands instinctively move to his chest, but the tension that had been building between you both for so long snaps. everything goes quiet in your mind, and for the first time tonight, all the chaos and nerves fall away, replaced by the heat of his kiss.

the kiss lingers for a moment, intense and raw, as if neither of you wants to pull away. your breath mingles with his, the world around you blurring until there’s only the feeling of him so close, so real. your heart pounds in your chest, each beat echoing in your ears, and you can feel the tension in his body as he holds you just a bit tighter, as if he’s afraid you might slip away.

when he finally pulls back, you’re left breathless, your forehead resting against his as you both try to catch your breath. his hands are still on you, one gently holding your face, the other resting on your hip, grounding you.

“you really don’t make things easy, do you?” he murmurs, his voice a little hoarse, the teasing edge back in his tone, but it’s softer now, more affectionate.

you don’t trust yourself to speak right away. all the words that had been stuck in your chest before are now lost, replaced by the overwhelming feeling of him so close, his touch still lingering on your skin. instead, you look up at him, meeting his eyes, trying to make sense of everything, but before you can say anything, he smiles slightly, a genuine, soft expression.

“i didn’t realise how much i liked you until you told me about that guy,” he admits, brushing his thumb over your cheek gently. “i was too stupid to notice.”

you dont get to reply because his hand moves down your back, pulling you closer, your chest pressed against his. the room feels warmer now, charged with something you can't ignore. your hands find their way to his chest, pushing lightly at first, unsure if you should pull away or let it happen. but he doesn't give you that chance.

his lips return to yours, but this time, there's more urgency in it, his kiss deepening as his tongue brushes against yours. you let out a soft sigh, the tension that's been building between you two for what feels like forever finally snapping. he groans, his hand moving to your neck, holding you in place as he deepens the kiss further. the heat between you both grows, and you can feel every inch of him pressing against you, making your pulse quicken.

seungcheol's voice is low, almost a whisper as he takes a step back, hands resting on your waist, grounding you both. "do you want to keep going?" he asks.

you nod, your heart racing, but your mind is clear. “yes.”

he doesn't say anything more, just nods and gently takes your hand, leading you through the apartment. when you get to your room, he lays you down on the bed gently, his hands never leaving you.

seungcheol hovers over you, his eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation, any sign that you’re unsure. you can feel his body close to yours, the warmth radiating off him. “are you sure?”

“yes, cheol.” you let out a light laugh, pulling him closer. “im sure.”

his lips trail down your jaw, each kiss softer than the last before he moves to your neck, his teeth grazing slightly over the skin. you let out a soft sigh once he pulls back after reaching where your shirt starts. before he can say anything, you’re reaching for the hem of your shirt, pulling the fabric over your head.

seungcheol takes a moment, his gaze lingering on you before meeting your eyes again.

“you’re so beautiful,” he says, unclasping your bra and slipping it off. “god.”

his hands find their way to your pants as he trails kisses down your chest, each one growing more desperate as his lips move lower. the warmth of his breath against your skin sends a shiver through you, and you can feel your heart race with every gentle press of his lips.

eventually, he pulls your pants off, discarding them somewhere on the floor behind him. “please.” you breathe out

“hmm?” he responds, his fingers slipping just under the band of your panties. “what do you want, baby?”

“need you inside me, please.”

he glances down at you, lips twitching up into a smirk. “patience.”

“no, no, no— cheol, please—” you whimper out.

“don’t worry, you’ll get what you want.” he cuts you off, pressing a light kiss to your collarbone.

when he finally stops teasing you and pulls your panties down, tossing them god knows where, you’re already a mess underneath him. every nerve in your body is on edge, anticipation building as he slides two fingers through your folds. “fuck, you’re soaking wet for me, baby.” a low groan escapes his lips, his restraint wavering as he fights to hold himself back.

he slowly pushes one finger into your pussy, giving you a moment to relax before he adds another and starts to curl them into all the right places.

“cheol!” your head falls back against the pillow, hand going to grab his wrist for some sort of stability.

“yeah, you like that?”

you’re already so close — just from the way his fingers move inside you, hitting every spot that sends sparks shooting througu your body.

you nod over and over again, hips rising to match the rhythm of his movements. “don’t stop— fuck— please, im so close.” 

your breath hitches, and you clutch at his arm, desperate for grounding as the sensations overwhelm you. every stroke of his fingers feels like its pulling you closer to the brink, and the tension in your body winds tighter with each passing second. “please—” the word slips out as a whisper, barely audible. your legs start to shake, the pleasure coursing through you almost too much to bear.

before you can even warn seungcheol, you’re coming undone all over his fingers, hips bucking up at the same time.

“god, thats so hot.” he mutters, but you’re too out of it to know if its to you or himself.

"you alright?" seungcheol asks softly, his hand resting on your hip as he looks down at you with concern. his touch is gentle, almost hesitant, as if he's checking for any sign of discomfort.

you nod, your breath still ragged, a soft smile tugging at your lips. "yeah, i'm good. just... didn't expect that." your voice is breathy, the lingering effects of the moment still making your body tingle.

seungcheol smirks, clearly pleased with the reaction. "you sure you're not too overwhelmed?" he teases, his hand moving to brush a strand of hair out of your face.

you laugh softly, the sound shaky but genuine. "im fine" you reply, looking up at him with a playful glint in your eye. "was that your way of saying you like me too?"

“it was.” he smirks, eyes locking onto yours. “think you can go for one more round?”

he really is going to be the death of you.

[himluv]

On the Mend

Chapter 21 of Say My Name (Say it Twice) is here! Lucanis and Davrin finally have a much needed Chat™. Read it below, or over on AO3.

Lucanis took the wooden stairs slowly, each step measured, as he approached Davrin’s quarters. He was sure the Warden would not be glad to see him, but after all they’d seen that night at the Cauldron…? Besides, this conversation was long overdue. 

Spite seethed and growled, but said nothing as they entered Davrin’s room. For a moment Lucanis was struck by the openness – the tall, paneless windows inviting the Fade-sky into the room. It was so different from his own quarters that he felt off-kilter for several heartbeats. It was too exposed. 

Spite bristled in response to Lucanis’s momentary discomfort, but still the demon kept his silence. He was sullen, almost pouting. Like a dog who’d been caught with his nose in the trash.

The next thing Lucanis noticed about Davrin’s room were the wood carvings. Some were collected from elsewhere, merely decoration, but most were obviously made by Davrin with a startling eye for detail. 

The final thing that caught Lucanis’s attention was just how comfortable the room was. A fire blazed in the hearth, before which sat a sturdy, but worn wingback chair. Assan lay sprawled at its feet, his head perking up as Lucanis stepped further into the room. 

Davrin peered out from the back of the chair, surprise overtaking his scowl for just a moment. “Lucanis?”

“Davrin.”

Doesn’t like us. Doesn’t trust, Spite hissed. 

Well, whose fault was that?

Spite grumbled but said nothing more. 

The Warden turned back to his whittling. “Come to gloat about Warden secrets?”

Lucanis winced at that. “Actually,” he moved to lean against Davrin’s workbench –well within the Warden’s peripheral line of sight. “I came to ask if you’re all right.”

Davrin’s scowl deepened, but he said nothing. As if wary of some sort of trap.

Mierda, what was he thinking? Davrin didn’t want his assurances, didn’t even need them. Rook would have this conversation with him, and do a better job of it. And yet, his conversation with Neve needled him. She wasn’t wrong. He needed to interact more with the team, and he needed to smooth things over with Davrin. He couldn’t let their conflict jeopardize their work. 

Lucanis sighed and shook his head. “The Cauldron, what happened to the griffons? That was… harrowing.” He gave a pointed glance at Assan. “And I’m not guardian to the last of the griffons.”

Davrin watched him, then snorted. “You sound like Rook.”

Lucanis chuckled at that. It was possibly the greatest compliment he’d ever received. “She was here already, then?”

“Barely had time to change out of my armor.” He sounded exasperated, but fondly so.

Likes. Rook, Spite said. 

Lucanis froze, suddenly wondering if the demon meant Davrin had feelings for Rook. The last thing they needed to add to their already contentious relationship was jealousy. 

No! Spite said. Likes Rook. Like everyone likes Rook! Rook is good. Rook helps. 

Well, that was a relief. Lucanis smirked at Davrin. “She’s good like that.”

“Yeah,” he said. He leaned back in his chair and gave Lucanis an appraising look. “Speaking of… ‘our Rook?’”

Lucanis pinched the bridge of his nose. “Mierda. I knew you’d pick up on that.”

“Kinda hard not to when a demon’s shouting it at you.”

Lucanis was surprised at how casually Davrin said that, at how much humor there was in the Warden’s voice. 

“So, you and Rook–”

Lucanis shook his head. “No.”

“Your demon seems to think so.” Davrin sighed. “And Rook definitely seems to like what she sees.” He chuckled. “I’ve never seen her blush as hard as she did in the kitchen the other day.”

Lucanis frowned. “Bellara certainly didn’t help matters.”

Davrin laughed. “Not for lack of trying!” His brow furrowed and he tilted his head. “So what’s holding you back?”

Lucanis raised an eyebrow at him. “Really?”

“The demon?” He shook his head. “Can’t say I agree with Rook’s taste, but if someone looked at me like that? It’d take more than a demon to keep me from them.”

Easy for him to say. He didn’t have a demon inside him. Lucanis glared at Davrin. “It’s not that simple.”

Davrin shrugged. “I get the feeling nothing is simple with you.”

HA! Spite barked. He’s. RIGHT!

The last thing Lucanis needed was Davrin and his demon teaming up against him. “I came here to talk about you,” he said. How had this conversation gotten away from him?

Davrin grinned. “You might sound like Rook, but she’s way better at this.”

“Of that, I have no doubt.”

They watched each other for a moment, their looks just cool enough not to count as glares. Then Assan stood and stretched, rubbing up against Davrin’s knee. 

The Warden sighed. “You might suck at this,” he said. “But, thanks for trying. I guess.” He winced at Lucanis. 

He shrugged. “I am sorry,” he said. “For Spite.”

Davrin waved him off. “It’s done,” he said. “And, Neve filled in some of the gaps.”

Lucanis scowled. “So she said.”

He smirked. “I told her you wouldn’t like that. But, it did help,” he said. “That shit with your cousin?” He shook his head.

Illario, Spite growled. 

“I’m handling it,” Lucanis said.

“I’m sure you are,” Davrin said. “I don’t envy the guy the pain you’ll put him through.”

Yessssss! 

Lucanis felt his face go blank as he shut down on the anger and heartbreak that swelled up in him at the thought of Illario. “The Crows are assassins, not torturers,” he said. “A good kill is clean and efficient.”

Davrin considered him. “For a contract, maybe. But this?” He shook his head. “This is personal. Family. That’s bound to get messy.”

It already was. It had been messy from the start, when Illario had been too cowardly to sink his blade into Lucanis’s back himself. 

“Yeah,” Davrin said. “That look, right there?” He chuckled. “That’s the real Demon of Vyrantium. And it’s scarier than whatever it is you have going on with Spite.”

I am. Scary! Spite grumbled. Tell him!

Lucanis ignored the demon and scoffed at Davrin. “Only if you’re a mage.”

“Yet another reason I’m happy just being a monster hunter.” 

Lucanis heard the slightly contrived note in Davrin’s voice, saw the forced cheer on his face. If he were more like Neve or Rook, he’d hone in on that inauthenticity, push and prod to help Davrin dissect that feeling. Hunt for the meaning hidden beneath.

Lucanis would rather chew glass. “So,” he said. “Are we…?”

Davrin sighed. “We’re good, Lucanis.”

“For now?” Lucanis smirked. 

Davrin chuckled. “For now.”

That was good enough for Lucanis. They nodded at one another, and Assan squawked his goodbye, then Lucanis hurried back to the close comfort of the pantry. But even before he was back in his comfortable space, he felt a weight lift from his chest. Losing control hadn’t permanently ruined anything. Nothing was broken that couldn’t be fixed. Maybe, there really was a through anything…

He hadn’t truly believed that until now. 

[wordywarriorwrites]

Between the Pages

Title: Between the Pages | AO3 | T+

Pairing: Joel Miller x F! Reader AU

Summary: A photograph brings you back together.

Warnings: Hints of spice.

A/N: For @jolapeno Dear-uary challenge. Prompted in bold/italics.

The photo Joel texted to you didn’t come with any additional context.

His thumb covered up the racier bits, but still, you knew what he had in his hand. A rather salacious polaroid: a private, intimate moment captured forever on film. A photograph meant only for your eyes and his. Something to be kept secreted away, and now, perhaps best forgotten about entirely.

Especially given the circumstances…  

“I found it tucked into the book you loaned me,” he followed up. “Right after the sex scene. Was that on purpose, or just a coincidence?”

You swallowed hard and rolled onto your side, “You should burn that.”

“Not gonna happen,” Joel shot back.

You paused, fingers hovered over the keyboard, cheek smashed into the feather pillow that still carried the faintest trace of his cologne. The two of you had been seeing each other for a while and had inevitably strayed into “where is this going” territory. Keep it casual in one direction, make it more serious in the other, and neither one of you with a map. And other than agreeing you enjoyed each other’s company and that the sex was rather phenomenal, nothing else had been discussed or decided.  

What were the kids calling it? A situation-ship? Is that what you’d gotten yourself into? Whatever the case, a couple of weeks had passed since the night of that particularly awkward conversation, and for a moment, you gave into the pull of your more defeatist thoughts.

You mused that you must’ve misread things. You had a drawer at his place, and he had one at yours, but it was just about convenience – not a sign of intention or genuine attachment. Sure, his glovebox now carried some of your favorite snacks because he knew you tended to get hangry without any warning. And okay, you kept his preferred coffee (sludge, swill, tar) on hand because he didn’t truly appreciate your more sophisticated blend (he swore it all tasted the same).

Or maybe he just didn’t want you anymore?

You groaned, flopped onto your back, and dropped that metaphorical hot potato because it was just too early for such dark contemplation. But still, you threw back the blankets, placed your phone on the nightstand, and got out of bed. From there, you went through the motions – hair and teeth, robe and slippers, toast and coffee.

Mug refilled with a second helping, you sipped and decided a trip to the grocery store was in order. Toilet paper and milk made the top of the list, but the bread wasn’t added because you heard the front door open, and the question of whether you were about to be killed by an axe murderer in your kitchen while wearing your favorite, fuzzy bathrobe was answered when Joel walked in.

It seemed as if he’d rushed over, and it was fucking criminal how good he looked, stood in the passthrough, breathing a bit ragged, damp hair clearly finger-combed, and flannel shirt buttoned all askew. The coffee pot spluttered in the silence, and he fiddled with the hideaway key he used to get in – the one you probably shouldn’t have shared the location of, especially if the two of you were going your separate ways.  

“You didn’t reply,” he blurted by way of greeting.

You stood tall and placed your mug and pen down on the island, “I didn’t know what to say.”

Joel nodded. Ran a hand over his beard. Paced back and forth for a time before he eventually stopped and put his hands on his hips. You met his eyes and tried to brace yourself for whatever he’d just geared himself up for, but the question he walloped you with still hurt.

“You wanna break it off?”

You blinked rapidly and cleared your throat, “Is that what you want?”

“No,” Joel sighed out raggedly. “It’s the last thing I want.”

“So, what do you want, then?”

The little stone turtle that held the spare key in its shell was carefully placed on the counter. Then, Joel slowly rounded the island, his steps careful, almost hesitant. You remained rooted, and you proved to him with your stillness that you had absolutely no intention of running. This talk could no longer be avoided – not if the two of you wanted to move forward. But achieving world peace would’ve been easier than not reaching for him, for the comfort of his touch – especially when he gripped your waist in his hands and turned you to face him.   

“Just want you,” he asserted, straight from the hip, and without any hesitation. “For however long you’ll let me have you. That alright?”

A veritable kaleidoscope of mixed emotions rushed through you. Your relief must’ve been palpable because when you nodded, Joel’s dimples made a rare appearance, and he swept you up into his arms. A breath later, you were being kissed until you were dizzy, and you made no protest when he started to shuffle you out of the kitchen and back into your bedroom.

“Christ, I missed you,” he groaned as he tugged at the tie of your robe.  

“I missed you, too,” you sighed against his mouth. While you worked on the buttons of his flannel, he yanked the belt free from his jeans and kicked off his boots. “But if you won’t burn that picture, at least hide it better than I did, okay?”

Joel grunted and shook his head, “Nuh-uh. Gonna frame it.” He pushed the robe from your shoulders and grinned again. “Maybe even put it on the fridge.”

You laughed and pinched his side, “Don’t you dare.”

He chuckled, shoved his jeans and boxers past his knees, and nudged you toward the bed. The sheets were cold when your back hit them, but they didn’t stay that way for long. Captured by his bedroom eyes, whatever doubts you had, whatever worries you carried – they all melted away. And everything you felt and wanted was distilled into just a few words.  

“Don’t let me go, Joel,” you breathed against the apple of his cheek. “Please, don’t let me go.”

The way he pulled back and looked at you. The way he kissed you – soft and slow, your chin gripped in his hand. The way he whispered “never” in such a way that was somehow achingly tender and fiercely possessive…   

There may not have been a camera to capture the moment, but you knew you’d remember it forever.

[eusuntgratie]

as a certified mom(tm), what's the most common thing people get wrong when they write children?

ooooh i love this question! (adding certified mom to the resume STAT btw)

i think the MOST common thing people get wrong is the realistic development/representation of a child at a certain age. i see lots of fic where a three year old is speaking in full sentences, where an eight year old baby-talks all the time, where a six year old has literally no concept of what is happening in their life. i saw a good tumblr post that was a great resource for writing kids by age that i'll see if i can find. but with how many moms are on tumblr, i think just asking them... how would a five year old talk? or how would a ten year old handle this type of situation? would be a great start.

there are other things that are always jarring for me as a parent that someone who doesn't spend a lot of time with kids might not notice or care about.

the first is that your (young) kids are ALWAYS around. you are literally always responsible for where your kid is and what they are doing. if they aren't with you, you've made a plan for where they are, how they'll get there, when you'll pick them up, etc. there are exceptions of course (people living on huge pieces of land or in neighborhoods where they know everyone are more likely to have their kids running around and might not know exactly where they are, some people have multigenerational households and have a lot of help). but even in those cases, the parent still knows and is responsible for that kid. there's nothing wrong with writing a kidfic that isn't realistic just bc its cute or you like the trope. but as a parent its jarring as hell to have a character introduced as a parent (especially a single parent!) and then the kid is never around. i promise you that man is not fuckin' or going on dates as much as you want him to be 🤣 or if he is, it took a LOT of work or he has a LOT of support.

related to this, every parent i know is exhausted. if their love interest isn't attracted to their eye bags or letting them sleep instead of waking them up for sex, get outta my face. the sexiest thing a partner could do for a parent? LET THEM SLEEP.

related, we do fuck with kids in the house. (cough cough chris going on sleepovers 3x/week in fic 🤣). its okay. you can make keeping quiet sexy. you can lock the door so you'll hear it if they need something without traumatizing them. you can use a baby monitor to keep an eye or ear out. we don't wait until our kids leave to have sex, or some of us would hardly ever have sex.

a few random notes and i'll wrap up. kids aren't (and shouldn't be put in the position to be) solving their parents problems for them. most kids won't immediately trust a new adult, especially if that person is dating their parent and their other parent is still in their life, even if they really like that person. a parent would not leave their child with their brand new love interest unless they had literally no other option. i have some issues, but there are very few people i trust to be alone with my kid. someone i don't know well would never make it onto that list.

lastly, parents fuck up. we aren't perfect. i try really really hard to break generational shit, to do better, to be a good mom. i've read lots of books, done tons of therapy, found great resources, done parenting groups, i consult with other parent friends and friends who work in mental health about challenging situations. and i fuck up all the time. kids, even great kids, are little assholes sometimes. nobody's perfect, and that's okay. nobody's kid is a perfect little angel 24/7 and nobody is a perfect parent.

my askbox is always open and i always love to talk about writing! thanks for this it was a fun question to answer <3

[deoidesign]

Someone killed my boss last night and he sent me this I'm so fired

god I can't wait to make this comic.

[lunarharp]

into the deep end - 30k T orufrey fic, focusing on memory trauma, disability, and romance.

the sweet oblivion of the victim, the poisoned freedom of the witch.

for one moment - it had felt like two parts returned - the needed reunion of two disparate halves. no more secrets, no more pain.

the moment you get to give back what you never wanted to take. that moment, under the night-blooming flowers, when they had both let out the same single broken sigh of relief.

but they were never whole to begin with, were they?

qifrey swore he wouldn't say 'sorry' to this man any more if he could help it - sorry is cheap now. he didn't want to be in a position ever again where you only have 'sorry' left. so he just looks down into the threads of his blanket, strains his eye until it hurts, feeling his insides - his throat, heart and head - burn with pain. he expects more, but olly says nothing.

olly says nothing.

[talkorsomething]

want to cut my hair again like you wouldn't believe. What are the possible consequences of going bald

[echidnana]

i think it took us so long to realize we have depression because we always attributed everything to our dissociation

[iniziare]

Re-tag drop: Yelan

[sleevebuscemii]

tmi

[ashmp3]

haterism is going to be strong in this post but i hateeeee pathetic weak people that victimize themselves. that kind of behaviour is just despicable to me it makes me ill im not joking. like one thing about me is i would rather die than let anyone feel sorry for me and seeing how some people willingly hope for it omfg...... no words. does it make me terrible person i dont know. but if youre like :( everyone hates me i am terrible arent i ....... my eye starts twitching and i am silent im not coddling you and now youre getting on my nerves so

[meateater-rabbit]

(dont read the tags actually)

[transurgender]

i wish i was better at character analysis because like. kabru (dunmeshi) and enrico (gayepo) are such similar characters it makes me want to Bite someone but the moment i try to explain how i feel my brain just gets fuckin fried. i think about either of them for 0.5 seconds and i explode on the spot

[lovrboyx]

body: ur hungry to the point of nausea

me: oh shit my b so if i eat something the nausea will stop right

body:

me: if i eat something the nausea will stop right

body: :)

[fleastinger]

[pessimisticprincess]

i’m so tired