#its ok my therapist has called me out
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i will rlly go “my perfectionistic tendencies are not perfect enough to be perfectionistic tendencies” and just nod
#its ok my therapist has called me out#gotta love therapists for calling us out#also man i honest to god love my anatomy class discussions#they r online so yay to that but also all the things my group and i have tlked abt is just sooo wonderful i love those humans even if#idk most of them#in contrast my elec class has mandatory in-person participation + discussion and#the way its almost always the most basic pts ever and thats it and ppl just do their own thing#i cldve gained as much from literally not being forced to participate thank u…#that was very offtopic BJT thats what the tags r for 😁
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god i hate everyone
#who thought it would be cute to immediately start ribbing me about how hairy and bald and ugly im gonna be when i go on t#one. im taking minoxidil. two. i wanna be hairy. and three. im not transitioning to attract you guys im transitioning to attract other trans#people! other trans guys find it hot come on!#like ok so dads brother is out here rn right#so first mom tells me hes gonna ask me questions about being trans. ok fine.#second she starts going on about how i had to be emotionally vulnerable with like 3 different therapists for this. whatever.#then when i start participating in the conversation she immediately asks “so how are you feeling about losing all your hair”#THEN she has the audacity to say to my uncle “yeah its sort of a gamble hes either gonna end up hairy like the italian side or fairly#baby smooth like yall“ when she fucking KNOWS that im dysphoric about my lack of body hair#and this happens every time! and its out of nowhere constantly!#all the while the cis men in the room are fucking bullying me with all this toxic masculinity bullshit!#sometimes i just wish i had never come out is all im saying#kept this a secret until i became an adult yknow. yeah i would have to do everything myself but it wouldn't be like this#just because i told you that you could call me a fag doesnt mean youre suddenly allowed to do microagressions constantly#shes tickled to fucking death with calling my future bottom growth my “teenie weenie” what the fuck! what the fuck!!!#and meanwhile every time i try to say words or make a joke my dad and grandpa jump on the fucking opportunity to correct me! or cut me off!#sorry im fucking exhausted i barely slept at all the night before last and got i think maybe 7 hours of sleep at most last night#and i just got out of therapy which always wears me out
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staring at the wall rn
#made the mistake of watching my memorial video i made 13yrs ago for my brother#now i'm like trying to process it all again and my monkey brain has to wonder why i cant just call him#or text him#or play games with him#and on top of it all my back hurts and i'm mega dizzy today (ily period + POTS <3)#grief doesnt get easier it just gets easier to live with ugh#holds my hands out for my f/os to help me but they're all evil little bastards that take ppls lives#that and the other ones.. all they know is tragedy#its so hard to cope with the death of my brother when no one and nothing can relate or share support#i'm so#bluh#i originally watched the video to see if i could hear my dad's voice in the background but alas#just brother grief AJDFKLD#and NOW father grief because i realize i uploaded NOTHING of what i had of my father on youtube#i'd be lucky if my mom had tapes of him but she purged everything of our family when my step father came into the picture#ok i gotta stop AJSDLKFASJDF#This is just turning into me needing to hold my hands out to my therapist xD#ugh#sorry i feel like i got no one to talk to about this garbage so i dump it on here sometimes#vent#tw death
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it's bullshit that the 3 nearest adhd support groups to me are all for parents struggling to deal with their adhd kids lmao
#the nearest adult one is over an hour away by train + currently indefinitely suspended but when thry start up again ill probs check it out#i think i just need like. a space where i can talk abt this shit with real people and likewise sympathise with them. solidarity#the adhd reddit isnt a terrible space but id rather it was an in person thing..#kind of miss my old flatmates bc one of them had adhd too and while we didnt talk a whole lot we had a couple conversations where i felt-#seen + like we actually had some common ground. bless my current flatmate i love her shes v sweet but i dont think she understands#my mum has adhd and i like talking abt it with her bc she knows a lot of technical stuff from a psychological standpoint#and also sometimes she'll call me just to be like My Head Is Filled With Wet Cement Right Now and im like Yeah ❤️#but I cant talk abt super personal things with her bc shes too closely emotionally involved and gets rly upset if im having a hard time#and i cant afford a therapist and dont think id get much out of it anyway i just want some kind of community !!!!!!#sorry for complaining sooo much today im just not feeling it girls. its ok tho im gonna go get some snacks from lidl#and hopefully i can do even just half an hour more of job apps when i get back and then maybe call it a day#oughf.#.diaries#.vent
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to add on to the humans are space orcs/earth is the universe's australia, sensing. my therapist has recently explained that its not normal the way i know who and where someone is by their footsteps. not just the sound, but the vibrations. if someone isnt purposely walking on light feet, i can tell who and where they are, even with headphones blaring. imagine a human on a ship and the awe-filled terror itd earn from their non-human crewmates.
edit: ive realized i wasnt clear enough in my intentions. im not saying "if you can tell peoples footsteps apart, youve been ✨️ T R A U M A T I Z E D ✨️ d-(^♡^)-b ". its about the inherent panic in Not hearing the steppies and therefore Not having the time to prepare yourself for whoever might be approaching and essentially being ambushed. also, being able to tell if someone is normalTM, happy, sad, et cetera. the combined terror of not being given time to make oneself "presentable" for whoevers coming, And Also whoever has just seemingly teleported is fucking pissed, which is never good. Anyways, enjoy!!! \(^o^)/
Gilith enters the library, searching for Human Raven. They seem to be found most often either here or in one of the many gardens on the ship. Human Alex said he'd likely find them here today.
Gilith pokes his head through the doorway, not seeing Human Raven, but before he can move on, a voice calls out from one of the high-backed chairs decorating the library.
"Hello Lithy, what do you need?"
Gilith sputters, "Wha- Human Raven, how did you know it was me?" Gilith makes his way over to the chair that held Human Raven in a twisted knot that, when Human Raven stood up, would surely leave a horrifying crunch Human Alex had likened to a human candy that exploded in one's mouth.
"You've got some loud stompers, Lithy."
"I do not know what that means, Human Raven."
Raven stands, causing Gilith to flinch at many snaps and crackles of their bones settling into place, and smiles up at his towering form.
"What did you need?"
Gilith notices more and more Human Raven's greetings. He thought maybe they could hear him coming, but they greeted him while wearing ear speakers, the volume so loud, Gilith could hear it from a few feet away.
Humans did not have psychic skills, and the only other human who seemed capable of a preemptive greeting was Human Alex. The two seemed to share all of their off-hours, so maybe that was where he could find his answers.
Gilith scoured the many gardens, stopping just outside of the doorway. He could hear Human Alex and Human Raven chattering to each other, but neither seemed to notice his presence.
In an attempt not to disturb them, he walked with what Human Bea had described as "tip-toes". A challenging feat, considering his round flat feet, but he managed.
Both Human Raven and Human Alex had their backs to him, so he coughed in the same way Human Bea often did to get everyone's attention.
The reaction he got was unexpected when both Human Raven and Human Alex flinched so hard their shoulders seemed to lock.
"My apologies! I didn't mean to startle you," he rushed over, but stopped short when they both flinched again. He recoiled his hand.
"It's ok, Lithy," Raven says, voice slightly choked. "Just give us a sec."
"Oh. Okay." Gilith turned his eyes down.
"What-" Alex started, his voice sounding as though it was rubbed raw. He cleared his throat and tried again. "What can we do for you, Gilith?"
"I did not have anything specific to talk to you about. I wanted to..." he trails off. "I wanted to inform you of the new plants we are picking up at the next trade planet."
Gilith feels his face twist with the lie, but now didn't seem like a good time to ask.
His desire to understand, however, doesn't fade after the incident. It only makes his hunger grow.
Instead of bothering Human Alex or Human Raven, Gilith decides to ask Human Bea, who does not sense him before he greets her.
"Hello, Human Bea."
"Yes, hello, Gilith. Is everything okay?"
"I have question."
Bea tilts her head. "Ask away."
"Are you- humans- able to detect someone before you see them?"
Bea's face softens into an aching sort of frown. "Not naturally."
"What do you mean?"
She takes a breath, seemingly preparing herself. "Well, most people are able to live in a relatively safe place. But some people aren't as lucky. Some people have to memorize the falls of others' feet. It's a learned survival tactic."
"I don't understand," Gilith says, his face wrinkling in confusion.
"Some people aren't safe, so for the ones who weren't born with the good luck of a safe home, they have to know who and where someone is. They have to know if they need to hide or prepare themself. They have to know if they're in danger or not."
Gilith feels his whole body go slack as a wave of sadness washes over him at the memory of Human Raven and Human Alex's reaction to his sudden appearance.
"I have loud stompers."
Bea's face scrunches up as though she's trying not to laugh. "You do. You have safe stompers, too."
#humans are weird#humans are space australians#earth is space australia#humans are space orcs#poor gilith hes just a skrunkily little guy#his skin is a kinesthetic mood ring lmao#space orcs
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waiting room | s. reid
summary: spencer can't seem to escape the girl in the waiting room
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader
warnings: mentions of reid's addiction & tobias hankel, mentions of kidnapping and mass shootings (in, like, a joking way??) my terrible, terrible humour, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE LMAO, this is deffo terrible, pls tell me if i missed anything!!
a/n: ok idk if i wanna continue this and make it a series so lmk lol (also im on writers block so i literally can't come up with SHIT)
SPENCER REID WAS a pessimist.
At least, that’s what he’d call himself. His colleague, Derek Morgan would most likely (and by most likely, he means, definitely already has) call him an overanalysing introvert. But in Spencer’s defense, there has never really been a good reason to go out and “live your life”. Consider this:
Go to the new coffee shop? Mass shooting.
Go to the mall? A child gets abducted.
Leave the apartment for a short while? A stalker finds out where he lives, kidnaps him in his sleep, and, in a nightmarish turn, auctions off his organs to the bidder in the black market.
Besides, his life isn’t some John Green book. There were no life-affirming adventures or poetic moments of self-discovery awaiting him. Carpe diem? A fanciful notion for others, but for him, not so much. Sorry, Mr. Keating.
Yet life—or more accurately, bureau protocol— had its own plans. Ever since the Tobias Hankel incident, a visit to the psychologist wasn’t just a request but rather (unfortunately for him) an order. Which meant, he’d have to risk his entire life to get up and walk for ten whole minutes just to sit and wait, in this glaringly bright waiting room, when he could have stayed at home and read the new books he’d gotten from his team as a get-well gift.
Speaking of which, why the gifts? He was fine. Physically, at least. But really, when have you ever seen get-well-soon cards in an asylum? Well, alright, maybe he was being a little bit dramatic. A visit to the psychologist doesn’t mean he’ll be institutionalised—but then again, Spencer Reid was never one to wear rose-tinted glasses.
This is his third time in the waiting room, and she’s always there. He isn’t sure as to why she is, because, well, unlike himself, she was very clearly an optimist—and at least, from the looks of it, she hasn’t been kidnapped and drugged in the past month. But she's sitting there again, in the exact same chair for the past three weeks, along with a beacon of smiles where joy usually fears to trend. Maybe, he isn't as good of a profiler as he’d like to think he is.
“Dr. Reid?” the call of his name rips him out of his thoughts. He looks up to see the same kind woman he’s seen the past three weeks—not the one in the waiting room, no, he means his therapist.
Dr. Brown was easy to profile: She wore heels to make herself look taller, and she hated wearing glasses, apparent by how she would continuously place them atop her head instead of her nose. Her teeth were abnormally perfect, which meant, she’d had to wear braces when she was younger—which (from his humbling experience) means she wasn’t exactly the most popular at school. Perhaps, psychology felt appealing to her because she could help people like her.
“How are you?” she asks, her pen clicking.
Usually, he’d offer her a meek shrug. The kind that could win awards for its commitment to non-commitment. Besides, he’s not one to talk about how he feels—there isn’t much to say, anyway. And let’s face it, “How are you?” in the grand tapestry of human interaction is almost as genuine as a three-dollar bill. And, get this, the average person asks “How are you?” 6,739 times a year but only listens to the answer about half the time—well, okay, maybe those numbers might have been fabricated, but isn’t the sincerity behind the question also made up? But instead of telling her all this, he remembers what Hotch had told him, one, two, three weeks ago: that he ought to cooperate with Dr. Brown or the board won’t be happy. So, he kisses his teeth before he says:
“Fine. I’m fine.”
And the session went on.
PLS TELL ME IF I SHLD CONTIUE OR NOT LOLOLOL spam my inbox with ideas I BEG.
#c can’t write#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid smut#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fic#criminal minds#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds fic#criminal minds fandom#spencer reid x fem!reader#hurt/comfort#fluff#angst#flangst#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid blurb
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MAJOR UPDATE: Questioning systems or systems in a doubt spiral pls read.
I recently told my therapist about potentially being a system. This was a scary move because she has previously had some iffy takes about systemhood. But I told her because I trusted that she would meet me where I was at and help me navigate , at the least, the general idea of not understanding my own brain if nothing else which I was ok with. I told her and it went as expected. I explained why I thought I might be a system but also the doubts I had about it and how it was distressing me to not understand myself. She agreed to use the language I was using for it and was happy to help me through (as is her job) and also because whether it was systemhood or not it was something in me that was trying to be seen and we would work on figuring out what it was.
Fast forward a few session, and I was going through another bout of "what the fuck even is my brain". I was starting to realize that my "systemhood" is very different from the things I've been seeing online. In the ways that it's different to other systems is: - I'm always in the front, always in the captains chair - I have no amnesia because I never switch out - My hyper-vigilance never lets me dissociate fully though i definitely "check out" in my own way - Head mates just feel like vague ideas or emotions
But the ways that are similar are: - These vague ideas or emotions have opinions and feelings that are different from my own. - Though they are vague, I can definitely tell they are separate from what I have come to understand as "me" - I become "a different person" in the sense of my attitude, vibe, behavior, and opinions change from where they were 5 mins ago, but I am still me, just a different me.
Anyway, I was already trying to make sense of all of this and was not planning on talking about it with my therapist because nervous... However, my therapist ask me about it first. She asked some clarifying questions about my partners system vs my own and how they are different. When I explained what I just wrote above to my therapist she said "Thats what I thought and I owe you an apology."
Basically, my therapist, like any good therapist should when confronted by something they don't know a lot about, had been doing research on complex forms of trauma and coping. Things in the same vain as CPTSD and Plurality including those two topics. She had specifically been reading a book called "The Body Keeps The Score" (TW it is a book about trauma and studies of trauma so it has details of case studies that some people may find incredibly triggering). I did some research on what exactly the book was talking about in regards to "systemhood" and from what I've found, chapter 14 at the end of a section called "Writing to yourself" and the first parts of chapter 17 have interesting information regarding systemhood and how its not entirely limited to things that are diagnosable like DID or OSDD. It seems to talk about how we all have several selves and trauma can get in the way of those selves communicating effectively. My therapist told me about this book and what she learned from it and apologized to me because the book made her realize that she was wrong and that I was in fact a system....
The session ended and I just kind of sat there... not sure how to feel but definitely feeling relief and validation.
After doing research on the book to write this I have some words of wisdom. If you are a questioning system or are doubting your validity remember this: The human brain is so incredibly complex and no one actually understands how it does anything beyond its basic physical functionality... the conceptual abilities of our mind are a mystery. How we define self is just theory. If you don't fit into boxes, labels, identities, or diagnoses that does not mean your experiences aren't real. You are going to be ok. Understand YOUR mind and how it works for YOU, not through a label or diagnosis. If those things come later, great! Do not let them destroy you just because you don’t fit perfectly. I am a system. Simply. No types, labels, or diagnosis. I am a system. I have a unique experience because my brain is no one elses. I am a system. I may not have people in my head in the traditional sense but I'm also not alone up here either. I am a system. I am a system. I am a system. Nobody has the right to deny me this for they do not live behind my eyes.
As I understand myself: I am a system.
#median system#questioning system#plurality#system#actually plural#actual system#actually median#questioning median system#plural community#neurogenic
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the ask was for a sanzu x fem reader nsfw and they’re both getting high together in the car and they do the thing where they bloke smoke in each other’s most and one things leads to another. But I thought it would be funny of on the middle of their sesh, ran calls and idk you could decide if he answers or not. Lol
— mile high club
ø contents: smoking, smut, possessiveness, fluff, takeomi slander ish bc i hate the mf, friends to lovers, mutual oblivious pining, akashi brothers' mentioned beefing
o word count : 7.1k.
ø notes: is it even a sanzu fic if i dont include some sort of tension and psychological explanation to do with the neglect he faced from Takeomi? no? ok anyway...
@wenumsmol 🫶🏾
The sun sets over the streets of Tokyo when you park the car in the garage of the Akashi household, having dropped Haru off at home since you’re now his designated driver because his license got suspended for reckless driving.
“We’re here.” The car shuts off when you turn the key, both hands resting on the wheel like the professional, respectable driver you are. “Now get out of my car.”
Sanzu groans from the backseat, laying flat on his back, hand splayed over his forehead, the cold heat from his hands doing wonders to soothe his burning headache.
“Oi.” Over your shoulder, you peek at him, fighting the urge to poke him awake. “I said we’re here.”
“I know.”
“ So…get out?”
“I don’t wanna.”
“You don’t—” You bite your words, stopping yourself to give yourself time to take a deep breath, soothing your bubbling frustration before it erupts. “You don’t want to enter your own house?”
He raises a long, slender finger, pointing insistently out the window. You follow his gaze to the back corner of the garage, Takeomi’s bike perched on its stand.
“Ohhh,” you realise, unbuckling your seatbelt to turn and face him fully. “Well..you can’t avoid him forever.”
He removes his hand from his forehead, eyebrows knitted, forehead creased as he glares at you. “Watch me.”
“I’m serious, Haru.”
“So am I.” He’s sitting up, face stern and serious, you swear his green eyes practically glow in the dark as they catch the edge of the yellow tint garage light.
When it comes to Takeomi, Haruchiyo mainly plans on avoiding him at all costs, dodging him around the house, wearing headphones at full volume just to drown out the sound of his brother’s voice, not coming back home for days on end, rather spending the night at yours or Mikey’s house.
He’s developed different coping mechanisms : talking to Mikey is a big help, though Mikey isn’t one for therapeutic advice, he’s still willing to lend a helping ear and listen to Haruchiyo rant on and on. It’s not much help though, only hearing responses like ‘ hm ’ , ‘ oh ’, and ‘ah’, maybe if Mikey has a little energy left in him, he’d nod occasionally, but that’s about as much help as you’d get.
His second coping mechanism is you, someone he’d befriended a couple months back and kept you by his side secretly ever since, using you as a personal chauffeur and a therapist, but more importantly a best friend. Someone who’d be there for him without judging him and his dirty secrets; someone who likes to be around him not because they’re scared or intimidated, but because they enjoy his presence.
He cannot be in the right state of mind when talking to his brother, not wanting to remember their interactions in the morning, so he relies on getting stoned or drunk to wipe his memory. It’s a potentially dangerous mechanism, but Sanzu enjoys the adrealine rush of trying something new, enjoys the out of body experiences, the fuzzy feelings, the wild imaginations and visions that make his world look colourful rather than monochromatic.
“Haru.” You call his name with that sweet voice of yours, one that makes his heart warm. “You can talk to me about anything, okay? I’m always gonna be here for you.”
He’s looking down at his lap, mouth twisted in a way he always does when he’s deep in thought. You can’t help but wonder just what’s going through that brain of his, knowing fully that up there is a mess of unorganised feelings and emotions he’d never been able to fully process.
“Haru. Is everything oka—”
“You know what I want?” He cuts you off, changing topics with a bright smile.
His decision to switch topics isn’t something that offends you, knowing that he takes time to fully open up and you’re willing to wait as long as he needs. “What do you want, Haru?”
“I want weed.”
“There’s no weed, wait. What are you doin—” He moves quickly, his lean body brushing past yours, balancing a hand on your lap for leverage as he reaches inside the glove compartment pulling out his stash. “What the hell! You stashed your crap in my car?!”
“Of course I did.” He cackles at the dumbfounded look on your face, moving to the backseat. “Where else would I put it?”
“Uh—I don’t know? Your room? Anywhere but my damn car! I got pulled over the other day. What if I had gotten caught and they searched my car?”
“Did you?” He shrugs half heartedly, opening the ziplock bag. Almost instantly the car smells of marijuana, your nose wrinkles as you try to process it.
“Well, no…but that’s not the point!”
“Shhhh,” he shushes you, taking his time to roll his blunt, all the while you’re glaring at him. “Stop pouting. You should be thanking me.”
“For what?”
“This.” He licks the joint to seal it, lifting it towards you like it’s his artistic masterpiece. The smile on his face screams child proud of their school project, diamond scars stretching cutely as his smile only widens. “It’s strong. Try it.”
“It better be.” You snatch it from his hands, holding it between your teeth as you manouevr yourself to the backseat to seat beside him.
His chin is heavy on your shoulder as he watches you light it, wanting to be as close to you as possible not only to get a whiff of that perfume he loves that you practically drown yourself in, but to see your initial reaction to the weed.
The smoke burns your throat before you could fully inhale, coughing violently whilst pounding on your chest to ease it. Haruchiyo grabs water from the front, tossing it to your lap as you erupt in a series of coughs. “What is that?”
“I dunno.” He eyes the joint between his two fingers, looking oddly fascinated by it. “I just heard it was strong.”
“No shit.” It hurts when you talk, still feeling the ghost of smoke searing your oesphagus.
His spare hand hooks onto your legs, and you yelp as he swings them over on his lap, slender fingers rubbing up and down your thigh as he smokes. “You’ll get used to it.”
“I don’t wanna.” You shift upwards on the seats, sitting on his lap, wrapping an arm around his shoulders to rest your forehead against the side of his face and shoulder. The scent of his cologne is overpowered by the marjiuana, but it’s still visible, dipping your face between his neckline and sighing. “This one is too much.”
“Are my eyes red?” His jaw moves when he speaks, and it tickles as his smooth skin brushes against your cheek.
It pains you to move from your current position, his warmth and scent are soothing to you, but you shift back, turning the car lights on to see better. The corners of his eyes are red, and he’s struggling to keep them fully open.
“Yeah, they are.” The urge to brush his cheeks is tempting, and your fingers twitch and hesitate by your side.
“Hey hey, wanna see somethin’ cool?” When you nod, he shifts upwards, his hand grabbing to hold onto your waist to ground you before you slip off his lap.
The sudden contact had you stiffening, blood roaring in your ears as his strong hand held your side. You watch him perform a trick, his diaphragm contracting as he inhales, lips pursed as he exhales, several rings of smoke following suit. Your brows raise in surprise, ready to praise him when he sucks it all back in with one huge breath, the rings dismantling in the air.
He turns back to look at you, chin high in the air, eyes tinted red gleaming as he grins at you, cheerful and animated. You can’t help it, reaching out to cup his soft cheeks with one hand, tracing over the outline of his lips, the shape of his scars with your thumb.
It’s like he’s frozen stiff as your fingers feel up his face, and he blinks at you as you look at him with those soft eyes of yours. “You’re so cute, Haru.”
His eyes dilate; from the light in the car, or the strong weed you don’t know, can’t tell. What you can tell is that from his silence, his mind is running wild, thoughts bouncing across his brain from left to right, mirroring the way his eyes dart over your face, your lips, and the curve of your nose.
“So are you.” The words spill out from his lips faster than the blush creeps onto his cheeks. He looks away, embarrassed, clearing his throat before smoking from the joint again. “I learnt it from Ran. That useless lazy fucker is sometimes helpful.”
“Ran, huh?” Your fingers find themselves latched to the front strands of his hair tucked into a ponytail, twirling it on your fingertips. “He’s the tall one, right?”
He chuckles, short and amused, voice muffled from the joint between his lips. “All my friends are tall, ya know?”
“Well maybe if you let me around your friends, I’d be able to identify them.”
“You’ll live without ‘em,” he says, blowing smoke in your face, snorting when you cough and swat the smoke away, then try to hit the side of his face, only for him to catch your hand in time. “Your reflexes suck ass.”
You struggle to shift your hand from his grip, frowning at him. “I’m not a ninja.”
“I can teach you to be one.”
“You a sensei, now?”
“I’m anything and everything. Like Batman.”
He smiles when you laugh softly, the sound making him feel lightheaded, paired along with the weed flowing through his veins. “Batman is rich, though. You’re not.”
“I can steal money, all is good.” His hand, warm and hot, slides under the hem of your shirt, leaving a searing trail behind his movements that burns into your skin. “I’ll buy you anything once I get rich. Promise.”
He’s been subtly leaning closer as he speaks the whole time, but you don’t notice until his forehead brushes yours and you’re both staring at each other, daring the other to move closer. “ Anything? ”
Green eyes fall down to your lips, not even trying to look subtle. “Anything.”
Fuck, at this angle you look so pretty, staring down at him with those dreamy eyes of yours, looking at him like he’s the most precious thing in the world. He always feels like that around you, another reason why he loves getting high around you. It forces him to be vulnerable around you, letting the feelings he’s been shovelling down refsurface.
Though it’s risky, and there’s nothing more he fears than rejection, he’s always been a risk taker. You make him feel good with your words, your presence, your voice, the silly moments you two share alone in his car, your room, his room.
Your lips are what he favours the most on your face, always glossy with whatever flavour lipbalm you wear that day, and he physically fights the urge to kiss them just to guess it. His eyes are drawn towards your lips like a magnet. The way you bite at them when you’re focused, chew on the skin when you’re nervous, lick them when they’re dry, he notices, and wonders how soft they truly are.
“Do…do you wanna kiss me?” Your question catches him off guard, brows knitting in confusion as he wonders if he’s been speaking his thoughts aloud this entire time, but in truth, he’s been making his intentions obvious as he’s been staring at nothing but your lips the entire time.
“Huh? Don’t be weird.” He instantly facepalms himself mentally, fighting the urge to turn back time to take back his words, but it’s too late when your brows rise, lips parting slightly in surprise before looking down at your lap with a slight frown.
“Oh, sorry. That was weird, wasn’t it?”
“It’s fine.” His heart stings in his chest, he can feel it clenching painfully leaving nothing but a hollow feeling in the depths of his stomach when he realises you’re upset. “Why’d you ask that anyway?”
Maybe he can shift the narrative, find out a way to spin the conversation back to kissing. He still has a chance. “Have you never kissed anyone before?”
“I have!” The pout is back on your face, but not from being sad; he can tell the difference, so he sighs in relief. But still…the way your lower lip juts out slightly has him fighting the urge to tug and bite at it. “I’m not a virgin, idiot.”
He doesn’t bother trying to hide the surprise on his face, and you notice. “What? It’s that hard to believe someone would fuck me? Am I that ugly or something?”
The effects of the weed start kicking in, now you feel yourself getting emotional over nothing.
“I never even said anything.”
“You didn’t need to. I’m not stupid, Haru.”
He flexes his jaw as he glares at you, trying to shovel his anger down. The argument is pointless, so he stays silent, bringing the blunt back to his lips. He inhales it for longer this time, and it can’t possibly be healthy for his lungs, but he doesn’t care.
“What time is it?” you ask, and his hand squeezes your waist tighter, stopping you from squirming from his lap.
“Why do you need the time?”
“Because I gotta get going at seven.”
“...why ?”
“Because…” you chirp, shifting to face him with a huge smile on your face, “I’ve got a date.”
When you bite down on your lip, he can’t even be bothered to look down at it, or notice it. It’s silent in the car as you wait for Haru to be your best friend/wingman that hypes you, ask you for his name, height, age, job, personality, whatever. But he’s silent, face unreadable, and the tension in the car rises thick when he continues to stay silent; your excitement fades along with your smile.
He knows he’s been silent for too long, now everything is awkward, but he can’t find the right words to say. Congratulations? It’s just a date, what do you expect him to do? Find you wedding rings?
His brain isn’t co-operating either, not in the right state of mind to process his words like a filter, so he says nothing before he says something he’ll regret.
“...Anyway,” you have to choke your words out, refusing to show your slight embarrassment, “hurry up and get high, so I can leave and get laid.”
“I am high.”
“Then I can leave.”
“No, you can’t.” He glares back when you glare at him, but he can’t find it in himself to control himself any longer. Maybe it was a bad idea to get high in a confided space with you, on his lap, with your face so close to his.
“Why can’t I?”
“...’cause he’s a loser, and you don’t wanna get laid by a loser.”
You snort. “He’s the only loser available, so maybe I do want to.”
“What if…there’s another loser available?” He goes stiff and still when your eyes flick up to his face, looking concentrated at him eye to eye as if you were trying to decipher his words. “Me. I’m the loser.”
“You?” He simply nods and you do the opposite and shake your head. “You’re not a loser.”
“Yeah, I am.” You shift on his lap when he shrugs, leaning his head back against the headrest, and you watch as smoke leaves his lips as he exhales.
His senses are intensified with the drugs, your fingers tickling their way up his shoulders, along his neck, to behind his head, lacing them between his soft hair. Leaning down, you hold his face in your hands and kiss him.
The moment your lips touch his, he feels like the world paused, and he’s dying to find whoever has control over the remote of his life so they could press play and he could embrace you like he deserves. Or, maybe he’s dying, and whoever is up there allows him to imagine just one night with you before he fades into nothing.
It’s real, all real. The tender slide of your lips against his are real, the sensation of his teeth sinking into your soft plump lips, biting, and nibbling at it is real, the gentle moans he eagerly draws from your lips when his tongue swipes against yours, wet, messy and sloppy is real.
“Fuck—” you whisper along the swell of his lips, pulling away to examine his face.
He looks gone, shallow half-lidded eyes looking up at you with blown wide pupils, mouth half open as if he’s forgotten how to close it.
“Haru, you there?” Your knuckle traces along the side of his face, stopping under his chin, lifting it to look up at you.
“Yeah yeah, ‘m here.”
Your giggle echoes in his ears, and he’s never been harder in his life, cock pressing uncomfortably tight against his pants. “Good, because you look wasted right now.”
“Just, fuck— stop talkin’. C’mere.” He pulls you down for a kiss with a hand at the back of your head, sloppily working his mouth against yours. He tastes like weed, the smell strong but it doesn’t stop you from licking into his mouth, desperate to drive the strong taste away and replace it.
Big, strong hands wander the length of your back, slipping under your shirt, cold hands hugging you tight, tight to his body that you can’t help but arch into him.
A sound that comes from the inside of the house has you pulling away, turning to face the window, and he trails his lips down the length of your neck. His nose pokes into the flesh of your neck as he sucks deep, red hickeys onto the plane of your neck, breathing heavily as he savours the feeling of your soft feeling of your skin.
He could get used to this; the weed makes him feel like your skin is ten times softer, or maybe that’s how it generally feels and you’re just perfect, so soft everywhere.
“Tak—take this off.” The words are lost to your neck as he sucks along the column of your throat, rogue hands wandering along your chest, up your shirt, kneading your tits through your bra.
“Okay, okay, wait —” When you pull backwards, he follows, leaning up from the seat, lips attached to your neck by the hip. “Haru. If you want to see me naked, you’re gonna have to let me remove my clothes.”
“Just…wait a min’ longer…” He sucks harder, and you shudder as shivers race down your body at the feeling of his teeth nibbling at the sensitive part of your neck. When he’s satisfied, he pulls away, admiring his handiwork. “You look so sexy like this, fuck.” He’s tugging your shirt off, throwing it behind you, uncaring of where it lands.
Warm hands roam your stomach, your sides, sliding up further to wrap around your throat. “So beautiful ‘n sexy, just for me.”
“You already said sexy.” He hums absentmindedly, obviously not paying attention if the way he’s squeezing the fat of your breasts were any indication.
“You’re sexy times two.” He grins up at you before pulling your bra cup down, and you inhale sharply when it brushes down your nipple. “No, no actually. Times infinity.”
You flush hot at his words, especially when his lips brush against your ears, biting down against the shell. He’s sweating from the heat in the car plus the heat from both your panting bodies.
“Don’t you think we should—ah fuck—” He tugs you upwards on his lap, your clothed cunt grinding against his hard cock, hands curling into fists behind his neck.
“We should what?” His musical chuckle vibrates along your ear, sending cold shivers down your spine, forcing you to arch to chase the feeling away. You squeal when he bites down along your ear once more, smirkingpleasantly at the soft, squishy press of your tits against his chest.
“We should go to your room. I mean there’s not much room in here.” Your neck aches from the angle you’re sitting at, neck bent at an awkward angle to avoid hitting the roof of the car.
There’s not enough space in this crammed car to fit yourself comfortably. Haru, on the other hand, is more than comfortable, seated on the seats like a king that’s blessed the majestic view of your half naked body atop of his.
“I got an idea,” he says, not giving you a moment to wonder what he’s thinking before he’s lifting you from his lap, plopping you onto the seats. Your forearm darts quickly to cover your chest when he pops the car door open, lips pressed together tightly as he walks to the front seat, yanks the door open without a care and readjusts the seats back, pushing it till there’s enough room between the wheel. “This space big enough for ya?”
You tilt your head past the seat, surveying the space with a keen eye. There’s enough room for you to kneel down and take his cock in your mouth without a fuss or a struggle. A bed sounds nicer though, the thought of sinking into his soft mattress as he fucks you crosses your mind, but it’s overpowered when you remember his siblings are home and you’d rather die than let them hear you.
“Seems good,” you shrug, sliding quickly out the car; the cold air from the garage AC hits you smack in the chest, hardening your nipples momentarily.
“Ah, ah wait.” Haru pulls you back before you could climb on top of him. The cute way your tilt your head at him, confused, makes his heart do a triple beat for a moment. “I wanna try somethin’.”
“Okay…”
It’s stressful the way he’s manouevring you along the seat, pressing your back into the front seat as he shifts to kneel between your legs. “Hold your legs up for me.”
You swallow hard, unable to taste your saliva with how fast your nerves are racing. Doing as he said, you bring your hands under your thighs, holding them up as he tugs your pants down, struggling to get them past your bent knees, glaring at you when you choke on your laugh, muttering out a quick apology.
“Don’t apologise now. You’ll be beggin’ for it later, trust me.”
His confidence is over the roof right now, evident in his strong posture, shoulders back as he leans forward, swiping a finger along your folds with ease.
“You’re really wet.” Your slick catches on the tip of his finger, and you want to hide your face between your hands when his pink tongue darts out to lick at it.
“Could you maybe not do that? It’s awkward…”
He hums when he looks at you; now it’s his turn to tilt his head at you. “How else am I supposed to eat you out then?” His hands press themselves between yours under your thighs, and your back aches from almost sliding down the seat in this awkward position. “You want me to skip the prep? Fuck you into the seat right now?”
“I mean—” It sounds like a good idea, but then you remember the length and thickness of his cock through his pants and swallow excessively. “Prep please.”
He smiles at you, the car light reflecting off the side of his face as he dips his face closer, digging his fingers into the swell of your thighs, nose pressed against your folds and sniffs so hard it’s like a vacuum, your clit tingles with the need to have his tongue in you.
“This gonna sound so weird, but I really don’t give a fuck but…” he moans as he licks along your slit, a long, wet stripe from the bottom to the top, “you taste so good, fuck—”
“Haru stop…” He seals his lips around your clit, fingernails digging into your thighs as he sucks hard, numbing your clit with the continous flicks of his tongue moving at rapid speed. “Oh my go—”
Your hands fight the urge to fly to his hair, pull him closer to grind his nose against your stubborn clit, but you remember his instructions, to keep your hands on your thighs, keep you spread open for him.
He’s devouring your pussy like a starved individual, flicking his tongue rapidly, slurping the wetness that drips from your puffy folds. You try to close your legs, try to squirm away from the ticklish feeling of his wet tongue trying to squeeze its way through your cunt, but it’s intoxicating, and overwhelming, especially when his finger tickles against your hole.
It’s fascinating watching it go in and out, and Haru dreads pulling his mouth away from your cunt but he needs to watch your face as his finger slides knuckle deep inside you. His bloodshot eyes twinkle as he watches your slick coat the length of his finger, translucent liquid dripping down his knuckles to the seat.
“You always get this wet?”
“I don’t know…” It’s not often you finger yourself, so the experience is first hand. You’re also partially amazed that your body managed to produce this much slick from a single finger. “Wait, wait, right there. That feels so good—”
“Here?” His finger curls inside you, itching the side of that spongy spot.
“No, no—not there, wait—” Your hips shift to the side a little, then it’s like something switches inside you, hands shaking against your thighs as he spreads you out with a second finger, applying pressure to that spot that has your moans increasing in pitch.
His cock twitches with the need to replace his fingers, sink himself deep inside you, watch your eyes cross as you melt in pleasure. He leans forward, slurping, sucking along the sensitive hood of your clit.
Your body feels numb, voice coming out as breathy pants as you tilt your head back to hit the headrest, giving into the warm, fuzzy feeling deep inside your abdomdem as he fingers you to your climax.
He knows that you're close when your walls cling and squeeze his fingers tight, barely giving him enough room to move them. His own tongue slithers through your folds, lapping up the leftover slick. The taste of you is better than he’d expected, and he thinks he could live between your legs for the rest of his life.
There’s a swell of pride swirling through his chest when he feels you lose yourself on his fingers and tongue, your teeth pressing into your bottom lip painfully as you jolt and sit up from the effects of your orgasm. Your hands forget holding your thighs up, gripping onto his hair tied up loosely in a ponytail and tug him forward, craving the warmth of his mouth sealed around your clit as your world comes tumbling down.
It takes a couple moments for you to get yourself together, still holding painfully onto his hair before letting go. He presses ticklish kisses along your thighs, licking at the wetness spread along them.
“That was—” You swallow, trying to find the words since your brain isn’t co-operating. “That was so good.”
You look all cute when flustered, face heated and flushed, your pretty lips left open as you pant heavily, desperately trying to catch your breath.
“Think I found my new addiction.” He grins up at you, big hands squeezing the fat of your thighs as he kneels up between your legs, wrapping them around his waist and leans in for a kiss.
Your hands cup his cheeks, holding him close to you as he licks into your mouth, forcing you to taste yourself on his tongue, giving you a moment to gather your nerves because you’re going to need it.
“I’m ready,” you mumble into his mouth, feeling the shiver that races down his spine.
“Bet, okay. Hold on.” He draws back, big hands spreading your thighs apart.
You look at him through your lashes as he sheds his shirt, tossing it behind you. His body is lean, capacious, abs faint but visible and your mouth waters, hand flying out to run down his stomach. Your touch is so light, his muscles flinching away from the ticklish feeling. Everything you do to him makes him feel so good.
He grips both your hands, pinning them above the headrest. “Keep ‘em there,” he says, unbuckling his belt, sliding his pants down to his knees. He grabs a condom from his back pocket, ignoring your humourless stare.
“You planned this?” You gesture at the condoms with your head.
“Better be safe than sorry.” He bites the end of the wrapper, pulling the condom out, rolling it slowly down his shaft.
Your eyeroll is cut short when the tip of his cock angles itself at your entrance. He can see the way you’re dripping, the slick smeared along your thighs.
Warmth engulfs the head of his cock as he slowly pushes it in you, and he hisses, biting his lip to stop himself from thinking how good you feel, how tight you’re going to squeeze his cock, how he’s going to cum inside you—
You’re panting, the tip of his cock stretching you out, almost screaming when it pushes past, the thick head making you dizzy it carves a path inside you. “Ah, Haru that—” He pushes deeper, and his eyes roll back when you clench around him.
Haru swears, gripping onto the base of his cock, squeezing it to stop himself from cumming too quickly, pushing through the urge to shove the rest of his length inside you. He stills halfway, needing to take a moment to compose himself, his mind fuzzy and warm, and he feels lightheaded.
He has to close his eyes, knowing if he looks down, seeing his cock between your legs, halfway inside you, he’d cum in an instant.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to wait—I can take it,” you pant, hips desperately trying to rut forward. “Please…”
He takes a moment to swallow, groaning lowly, as he pushes the rest of his cock inside you, trying to ignore the tight suction of your walls. The moment he bottoms out, he’s falling forward, dipping his face between your neck and shoulder and moans, the sound desperate and needy, causing your pussy to clench and quiver around him.
You wrap your legs around his waist, arms wrapping around his head as you hold him closely, enjoying the feeling of his breath tickling your shoulders. “You okay?”
It’s funny how you’re asking him this instead of the other way round, and a part of you feels pride in the fact you could make someone this desperate and needy without effort.
“I’m good…it’s just…fuck , you’re so tight.” He forces himself to inhale deeply, eyes squeezing shut painfully to compose himself. He shivers at the feeling of your nails raking up and down his hair, scratching at his scalp addictvely. “You’re good though, right? It doesn’t hurt?”
You shake your head, smiling softly at him. “Nah. The seats a little uncomfortable but…that’s about it. You can move, Haru.”
“It’s uncomfy? Oh…” You almost want to cry when he pulls out, but he’s lifting you from the seat, switching your positions, slotting you back down on his lap.
“You want me to ride you?”
He nods, biting his lip when you grab onto his cock, seating yourself down on his cock.
“Oh my god—” You feel so full, his thick cock stretches your walls, whimpering beside his ear when he rolls his hips sensually, pressing his cock deeper inside you.
“ Holy shit , you’re so tight.” Your pussy drives him into a frenzy, eyes threatening to roll back at the way your cunt squeezes him so tight, clinging to every inch of him.
He swears, voice low, sounding wrecked as you begin riding him a little faster, slowly lifting your hips up and down. The obscene squelch of your pussy grasping pathetically around his thick shaft has him biting his lip so hard he might draw blood.
“ Haru.” You wail his name, collapsing onto his chest, shuddering when his hands, rough and warm, grab onto your hips to slow your pace down.
“Yeah?” His voice is quiet, like a whisper, so he clears his throat and tries again. “Yeah? What’s wrong?”
“Lemme move—” You trail your lips down his neck in an attempt to soften him, waiting for him to let go of you so you can move faster. There’s a nudging spot inside you, an itch that needs to be scratched. Your attempt to move is shut down again, frustration building up and up the longer you feel his cock twitch inside you. “Haru please…”
“If I let go, you gotta promise to take it slow.”
“But I wanna make you feel good.” You whisper along his lips, tugging at it with your teeth. He groans into your mouth, and shifts for a moment, his cock follows suit, twitching desperately for some friction. “Wait, do that again.”
“This?” He rolls his hips upwards, rolls your hips backwards and forwards, and you drip a little wetter down his leg, wetting his thighs.
“Yes. Do it again.”
He starts a steady pace, steady enough for you to feel the way he’s deliberately aiming at that spot in you that makes you squirm around.
“I’m so close.” He says beside your ear, his voice lingering in your head, clouded by the feeling of his hands roaming your back, scratching at it with every bounce you give him.
“Me…me too.”
He’s tense, gritting his teeth when you clench around him. You shift backwards, unslinking your hands from around his neck to grab at his knees, using them as leverage to support yourself as you roll your hips in circles.
He can feel the energy buzzing between you both, can feel the tingling sensation on the edge of his fingertips, the drugs running through his veins has the regular feeling of sex intensifieid, and he swears he can feel every inch of you.
Everything is so hot right now, the temperature in the car, the feel of your hands braced against his knees, the way your nails dig into the bone, the way your tits bounce in his face as you fuck yourself on his cock.
You clench when you cum, and he leans forward suddenly, grabbing your hips to lift you up, slamming you back down with a loud moan, hips jerking as he cums inside you.
You’re shaking, trembling at the feeling of his cum spurting inside you, the wet sensation is ticklish, cold shivers running down your spine.
“You feel so fuckin’ good,” he mumbles again, holding you down to feel your greedy walls sucking him in further. “Holy fuck, I could stay here forever.”
“I need a shower.” You say once you come back to your senses, groaning softly when you lift yourself up and off his cock, the wet squelch following after echoes throughout the car.
“That’s so hot.” He mutters, eyes wide with fascincation as he reaches out to thumb at your clit, enjoying the way you shiver and let out a soft moan as he rubs it in circles. “Holy shit that’s so hot. You’re so hot.”
“I kno—” It’s distracting when you can feel his cum dripping out from you slowly making you lose your train of thought , the drip of it is anticipating until it forms a small pool between both of your bodies. “I know.”
“You hesitated.”
“I didn’t.”
He removes his thumb, wiping the wetness from it along his tongue, tasting you, and you feel your face flush at the action, burning hot when looks up at you, the corners of his mouth dragging up slowly. “You did.”
“Shut up.”
Sanzu’s reaching towards the backseat for his stash, and you laugh at how his arm barely reaches it, flailing it uselessly around the air.
“You’re not gonna reach it, Haru.”
“Watch me.”
He grunts and groans like he’s lifting heavy bricks, and you start to take pity on him. “Dude, just give up.”
“No.”
If there’s one thing about Sanzu it’s that he’s determined, but not in the way you think. It’s more the stubborn version, always trying to do the impossible, ignoring you when you tell him it’s not possible, then sulks when he fails.
He clicks his tongue, shifting you down on his lap so he has more room and this time successfully grabs at it. “Told you. Always hatin’ on me.”
You giggle, faint and shrill, leaning forward to rest your head against his shoulder, watching him dug through the contents of the bag, his slender, skilled fingers professionally rolling another blunt.
It’s silent in the car again, you two both bask in each other’s presence. Both of you refusing to discuss what happened earlier, not sure if those sudden feelings you felt were because of the weed or if there’s something else deep inside, a false truth you’ve refused to make terms with, or shoved them aside for another unknown reason unbeknownst to you.
Your head is racing with thoughts, pictures of Haru wondering where you suddenly felt these emotions towards him came from. The thought of sharing him with anyone else angers you, but it shouldn’t because you’re both friends. The thought of him laying in a car with another girl on top of him angers you, makes you feel bitter and resentment towards this imaginary woman your brain fabricated inside your head.
It’s like your body is working against you.
Stupid weed.
Haru’s gone for the second time today, and for the first time in what felt like ten minutes—in actuality it was only three—you look up at him. He looks like he’s falling asleep, those chubby cheeks of his so promising, so soft, you can’t help but shift upwards, pressing soft kisses against them.
It should be weird to him that he doesn’t question your sudden out of character movements, but then again you both did just have sex not longer than five minutes ago.
His phone rings at the backseat, pulling you away from his neck where you were sucking fresh purple hickeys onto and he groans when your ass brushes aginst his cock. It’s been slightly hard the entire time, still not over his recent orgasm, but not strong enough to maintain itself to stand tall.
“What’re you doin’?” You freeze as your hand hovers over his phone.
“Your phone’s been ringing non-stop. It’s irritating.” The caller ID is Ran, and part of you wants to answer it so you can know what he looks like. It’s been nudging at your brain the entire time, trying to figure out which one of his friends is who, trying to put the pieces of the faceless group of boys together to solve the puzzle.
“Just ignore it—okay then.” You answer the phone away, turning the camera away from your naked body onto Sanzu’s face. You squirm around, trying to find where Sanzu threw your bra and shirt as the two engage in small talk.
“What do you want?”
Ran snorts on the other end, his voice deep, familiar, and husky. “Don’t needa get all pissy, you big baby. Takeomi wants to know where you are.”
“What the fuck does that have to do wit’ me?”
“Call him, or somethin’. I don’t fuckin’ know?”
Haru sniffs, nose wrinkling when the smoke he blows out invades his nostrils. “Tell him I’m busy.”
“Being a fuckin’ junkie?” Ran snorts, petty and bitterly, voice now laced in sarcasm. “So productive.”
Haruchiyo rolls his eyes at the same time you put your shirt back on, reaching under your shirt to fix the straps of your bra. “I’m doing more than getting high, you slug. I’m with my friend.”
You had tuned out the conversation from the beginning, your main priority being your clothes, but at the mention of ‘friend’, he jostles his leg, catching your attention. “Say hello.”
“Uh…hello?”
“Oh? Who might you be?”
“I’m—” Haruchiyo ends the call before you could even get the first letter of your name out. “What the hell?”
He lazily shrugs, tossing his phone into the backseat without a care. It hits the edge of the seat, before hitting the floor with a mild smack. Two noble fingers grasp at your chin, redirecting your gaze from his probably broken phone to his face.
The kiss is passionate, and long, his wet slide of his tongue laving itself inside your mouth. Your face grows hot when his lips wrap around the length of your tongue, sucking the moisture from it, replacing it with his own. It’s messy but you don’t care, happily drinking the mixed saliva from his mouth.
His sharp teeth sink into your lips, stopping you from pulling away, kissing you with fervour as his heavy head spins, and bright flashes of colour appears behind his closed eyes.
“I’m so hungry,” he gasps out when he finally pulls away, wiping the saliva from his mouth with his forearm, giving you back the breath he stole from your lungs with that kiss.
“You want me to drive you to McDonalds?”
He grins up at you, that stupid adorable look on his face that has your heart warming in your chest. “Is this your way of asking me out on a date?”
“It’s my way of forcing some food down your throat before you die of starvation.”
“What if I was thirsty instead?”
“McDonalds sells drinks, dumbass.”
“ Or… ” He places his hands on your hips, pulling you forward on his lap. You yelp at the motion, hands flying to the headrest behind him to stabilise yourself.
What he’s insinuating is lost to you for a moment, only becoming obvious when his hand snakes down to your pussy, thumb nudging insistently at your clit. His eyes dip down to your chest, your nipples still hard and poking through the thin fabric of your shirt, then drags them back up to your face and smiles.
“You’re so horny.” Your eyeroll is fabricated and fake, part of you deep down wants it too.
“You like it though.” It’s true, and he knows it too. The defeated look on your face is all he needs to know when he moves to open the car door, nodding his head outside. “Let’s go to my room now.”
#—tr </3#sanzu x reader#sanzu haruchiyo x you#sanzu haruchiyo x reader#tokrev sanzu#tr x reader#tokrev#tokrev x reader#tokyo revengers smut#sanzu smut#sanzu haruchiyo smut#haruchiyo sanzu x reader#featuring ran#haitani ran x reader#ran haitani x reader#ran x reader
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WIBTA For Snitching On My Brother?
tl;dr at the end, the submissions a bit long. sorry if this sounds like stupid teen drama, but i needed outside opinions. (tw for mentions of attempted suicide)
so for a bit of context here, me (14nb) and my brother (14m) both have Parental RestrictionsTM on our phones. In my opinion they are way more severe than they need to be. i am not allowed to have any social media at all, my mother barely tolerates discord. I cannot text anyone who is not my direct sibling or parent from 9pm at night to noon the next day and i cant use any "nonessential" apps during that time frame too. my brother has the same restrictions on his phone, but he has safari removed because my mother said he was playing "random internet games". however, he has found ways around this and ways around the app restrictions. i know how he does it. i really dont have any intention of telling our mother, its none of my business and i honestly dont care that much.
I recently moved to a new school. My brother and i were homeschooled prior to this during covid. And it was fine. We went to a homeschool co-op twice a week. A year ago we were both enrolled in Local Community College as dual enrollment students. A semester into that i was Not Vibing Well and ended up having a breakdown and getting a therapist. I would talk to her directly about this but i havent been able to see her in weeks due to scheduling conflicts. The workload seemed too much to me, there was no longer a distinction between School and Home. i felt like i was constantly on the clock, and i barely saw my friends. In addition to other factors at my co-op, I got very lonely. At that time the limits on my phone were 9pm-3pm (it was later edited to 9am to noon) . I cant remember exactly what happened, but i asked my mother to at least change the communication limits so that i could talk to my friends during the day. She said no, stating that I Do Not Need to Communicate With Friends During The School Day. i do not have a real “school day” i am at home basically 5/7 days of the week. And normal kids see their friends every day at school. The argument got dropped then.
Fast forward half a year, i felt increasingly lonely, out of place, bothersome, etc, at my co-op and have decided to try going to Local Public Highschool. This meant leaving my best friend (14f) whom i love dearly (for the purposes of this post i will call her Z). Z is one of my favorite people in the whole world, we got platonically married, I lovingly refer to her as “my wife”, and i would genuinely die for her. She got a phone over the summer which means we have a better way to communicate, replacing discord as the primary communication system. Also at that time one of my best online friends fucked up their discord account somehow and the whole online group moved to text. there's about four of them? J, Other J, B, and L (ages vary from 12-16). I believe only B is directly relevant to this story but the others are worth mentioning. Additional context (tw for mentions of suicide from now on), all of those four are varyingly suicidal. B has attempted before, at least twice I believe. out of the group i am probably the most mentally stable.
School starts! I am already feeling a bit lonely due to leaving Z but we stay positive. I wake up for school at like 530 and check my phone at like 6:45. Woohoo a message from B! It was sent at 4 am. This is concerning. There is a glitch that i can use in order to view texts for between half a second and four seconds, it depends, and i use it. B’s message reads “Bye”. theres no fucking reason that they would be texting me goodbye at 4am in the morning unless they were going to kill themselves. I cannot properly view or respond to that text until noon, so eight hours. I wait to know if my friend is ok for eight hours, and at noon i check my phone again. In that time i’ve received messages from the groupchat. J, Other J, and L all received “bye” texts from B at around the same time period. After a few messages, we know B is ok, i dmed them privately and they responded both in ims and the gc. So they are ok. But i had to wait for eight hours to know that. Later that day i asked my mom if she had considered my proposal (i asked her a day or two before if she would at least turn off communication limits because it is also rather embarrassing to be honest to have to tell other people that oh i cant respond to your message right now, sorry my mom has limits on my phone :D. In addition i get anxious when i send a message that im nervous abt and it doesnt get responded to for hours so i hate leaving messages for longer than two hours). Once again, she said no. it goes against her Views As A Parent for me to have “unrestricted access” to my phone. She offered to add only Z to the list of people i can contact during the limits. This is better than nothing but Z texts more in the groupchat than she does in private messages so it wouldn’t work that well. We argued, it didnt work out, i got pissed off and we both went to bed. i very strongly feel that for like my mental health i need to be able to communicate with my friends better than i can at the moment. And i dont want to wake up to a message from a friend, have it be the last one they ever send, and not be able to respond for hours.
Heres where the part where i could be an asshole comes in. (so sorry that that was really long i didnt know what parts would be needed as context and what were not so i just typed everything i think might be relevant). This isnt something that i am very strongly considering, as i truly dont want to fuck up my relationship with my brother and i love him a lot. I just want opinions on whether it would like be going too far i guess. I am considering offering a trade. I tell my mother how my brother has found ways around his limits, and she turns off the communication limits on my phone. WIBTA if i did that?
TL;DR: would i be the asshole if i snitched on how my brother got around some restrictions in exchange for me being able to communicate with my friends?
What are these acronyms?
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ok ven is genuineposting about a comedy podcast again alert but im in the middle of the newest dndads ep and ngl. one thing the crew has always done SO WELL is the way they manage to portray that these characters are real friends
the s1 dads are the strongest example of this to me and ill use those moments as examples because ive listened to it the most but its so obvious in every single other season and character group theyve ever made, and it popped into my head when the s3 crew learn that trudys a bot
like all the characters do fight and get into disagreements and do shitty things to eachother, sometimes the reason being that its a comedy and sometimes glenn stealing darryls car or any of them really calling any other dad a bad parent is funny ..... but then they have these insanely genuine moments that feel so fucking real and honest that arent played for laughs for a second. glenn hugging ron when he gets out of prison and ron crying, the rest of the dad crew essentially tackling glenn into a big hug after learning his wife is dead, everyone being SO ready to dropkick willy when they learn what they did to ron and yelling at him so much that anthony cant get a word in for a good minute, the hug darryl, henry, and ron have after ron talks to a therapist and henry talks to autumn and darryl talks to his dad, glenn sharing with darryl that he doesnt know what hes gonna do or if hes gonna stay in the realms after the big omegadaddies finale fight but never for a second even considering not helping the daddies get back to earth even if hes not gonna follow them,,,
i 100% believe that its one of the core foundations of dndads, that thats a big subconscious reason why people instantly adore this podcast so much and the crew is so fucking good at being earnest when they need to be. these characters, no matter which group of them were talking about (s1, 2, 3, or the miniseries ones) are real friends who care about eachother and would kill and die for eachother
#like yeah they will all go “ok you die lmao” when freddie rolls a 100 on a con save etc and whatever#but when trudy tells everyone shes a robot everyone reacts with just the right amount of shock and seriousness#they care so much about her. like. tony starts screaming and francis adds tuckers name to a kill list#its been like two days of in-game time and they care so much about eachother#the dndads crew is just phenominal at balancing comedy and seriousness#caring about not just their own characters but eachothers as well#tldr this whole show radiates warmth like no other#dndads#dungeons and daddies#glenn close#darryl wilson#henry oak#ron stampler#dndads s1#dndads s2#dndads s3#the peachyville horror#tph#trudy trout#tony collette#francis farnsworth#kelsey grammer#dndads spoilers#dungeons and daddies spoilers
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DCXDP prompt
Ok, so there's plenty of Danny laying low or freaking out about the no meta rule, but I have this CRAVING of someone for once just explaining it to him? Like whoever bird or birds he's talking to just leans in and whispers "Wanna know a secret? That's mostly just a mind control precaution. I mean would you want to see Supes jacked up on fear gas? If the league do come over he prefers to be called first so he's close if something happens."
Danny- "Oh... yeah that makes sense actually, that shit isn't fun to be under.."
"Wait is THAT why you have that string of robberies on your record?!"
"That and the time my whole town got possessed in order to make me look bad and get arrested.."
The bird then drags Danny into the cave to open Bruce's file on him, and they both sit down and fill in the gaps on the shadier spots of his record. Heck Danny eventually gives Bats a few thermoses and other less harmful but still disabling device blueprints to add to the contingency file cause even if Dan is in therapy and on probation he knows his shit luck will probably make it needed sooner rather than later and he knows how fast it will go bad.
It comes in very handy at the next gala when Vlad attempts to have a duplicate overshadow Bruce who refuses to take his business propositions. Vlad gets nosey before Danny pulls up his king rights and makes vlad take an Oath (the magic binding kind) to not mess with Bruce or his family or reveal any of their super identities to anyone at all. Constantine is there beforehand to read over the contract and outthink any loopholes before vlad can take advantage of them.
Danny gives them samples of ecto-dejecto for medical emergencies, the Bat's keep them refreshed and in stock especally after they meet Ellie and hear about her stability problems. With help from Frostbite and Danny's ok they start working on a more reliable formula just for Ellie's sake.
Yes Jason is calmer around the halfas and he is slowly stabilizing enough form a proper core from it, (not an instant fix this time!) whether hes becoming a true halfa, more towards a remnant, or both they arent sure. But one night when the phantoms arent around Jason is having a bad time, reacting from something he was hit with during a fight. Tim just grabs one of the ecto-pens on a whim and it just flushes out the toxin so fast Jay passes out. When he wakes up his core has had a good growth spurt, its still not complete yet but he's beginning to get some minor abilities, the Phantom sibs start coaching him before it gets strong enough for Jason to turn completely intangible and if Jay starts complaining? Clockwork whisks them ALL up to the tower for a home movie night of Danny's greatest fails. Grampa has a collection, good and bad XD. Yes Danny is cringing in shame while eating Clockwork's ecto cookies but Jason is slowly starting to understand the importance of getting the basics right cause he does NOT want to accidentally sink completely under the ground without being able to get back out no thank you!!
What core type would he get anyway? Shadow's like Johnny because of the stealth perks? Earth to prevent being buried again? Would he have literature as a secondary obsession cause obviously he's gonna follow Danny into the family/protection category but since Danny also has a space obsession why not?
He puts Jazz's name in the list of superhero safe therapists, the fact she's already making waves at Arkam is only boosting her reputation. Especially once they read her paper on ghost obsessions and how sometimes they are comparable to hyper-fixations in autistics in the way they both satisfy and promote healthy growth for a ghosts physical and mental state but also how being deprived of them or forced to go against them can be severely harmful to their literal health.
And that was one thing the birds kept tripping on to understand whenever they needed to bench one of the halfas but they would end up just hovering around NEEDING to be helpful no mater how much they are told to go back to bed. They also get a whole new understanding on what happened to Dan cause yeah his whole timeline is based on loosing his family and retaliating out of grief.
So from then on the halfas are allowed to help with little tasks as long as they do not strain their recovery at all. Whenever Danny gets sickly and depressed they take him up to the watch tower, Ellie gets lessons in different languages so she can interact more when they let her join them on international trips, Jason gets set loose in a newly discovered bookstore when the manor's or Bab's library isn't enough, and Dan.. they're still figuring him out but he seems to enjoy wrecking little play city set ups and games where you play as the monster like Godzilla or Rampage along with general ghost sibling rough housing. (Lilo and Stitch is his favorite movie but you'd be hard pressed to get him to admit it,)
As for ships, definitely anger management. Jason becomes an unofficial fourth Phantom sib. Platonic everlasting trio cause Danny loves his friends and they will pet him like a cat for hours while his tail coils around them possessively like a giant snake and still make memes of it when he's grumpy. Brain dead is fun also, especially if Danny or the others are capable of Little Baby Man form and Tim has to fight Damian for cuddle rights! Bats has his usual girls but hey superman isn't that bad to hang around either.
#dc x dp#dc x dp prompt#silverlugia's free prompts#danny phantom#batman#jason peter todd#danielle phantom#dan phantom#halfa jason#tag me if you use this#little baby man danny?
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I'm going to really need you to hear me out on this one because it seems a little ick at first, but Sandy x Clint. I imagine that they bond over being friends with Emily initially then it blossoms into something more. And it's the slightly stereotypical mid man with model women.
I love ur ideas Ollie
I love that you called it as a mid man with a model woman thats so funny lmao
Ok honestly guys... I'm prepared to forgive Clint. I know.
I saw a post recently pointing out that Sebastian has a comparably sus line about Abigail. I am a Sebastian lover and not a hypocrite so I took a deep look inward and decided, you know what, being a blacksmith is hot. His facial hair is hot. I'm okay with it. We could give him a redemption arc.
It helps imo that Emily is weird. Personally I think it lends credibility to his crush in a way that would have been lost if his crush was on Haley, for example. Clint and Emily were friends first and he likes her personality, and is potentially just misguided because of self-esteem issues and toxic masculinity making him believe he can't have female friends.
So let's put his ass in therapy when Emily gets married and he has his little menty b about it.
He starts to leave the workshop more per his therapist's insistence. He joins some kind of club in town like a wine and cheese night. (Im basing off of his little Parisian-looking outfit during Emily's clothing therapy cutscene, its not out of nowhere, Clint is a man of culture on the inside) He apologizes to Emily and they start to rebuild their friendship, maybe have a fun little shopping makeover.
Sandy has never really met Clint before his makeover. Maybe a glimpse of him at an event. But they formally meet at Emily's birthday party and Sandy likes what she sees.
Clint's easily flustered. Not a tall man but BUILT, stocky with chiseled fucking arms from his smithing. A man not afraid to get his hands dirty, but also likes a bit of culture. He's well-groomed, with fun facial hair that is just quirky enough to be very intriguing to Sandy. Like, come on. When you look at it like that, you can't tell me it's not compelling.
Sandy is confident and domineering. She zeroes in on him so hard even Emily is like woah there girl he's fragile lol. The success of this relationship is largely due to Emily, in the early days. Clint relies on her and his therapist to navigate the intense feelings of inadequacy until him and Sandy eventually develop a solid enough platform of open communication.
(Partially thanks to BDSM) Oh my god who said that... 🫢
This ask is a part of the (now closed) SDV Rarepair Challenge! Check out the other answers here, and make sure to boost your favorite so it can appear in the final fic poll! More info on that here.
#stardew valley#sdv#answered asks#send asks#fic writer#ao3 writer#rarepair#shipping in the valley#rare ship#rarepair challenge#ficlet#fic idea#lily speaks#sdv clint#sdv sandy#sandy x clint#clint x sandy#stardew sandy#stardew clint
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Dysfunctional Fam™
Dysfunctional Fam™
sunboi: yo guys why poseidon looks mad
messenger pigeon: wdym bro
sunboi: he looks ready to turn someone into a dolphin
drunk_on_LOOOOVE: ey! That’s ripping me off!
sunboi: fine he looks ready to turn someone into a horse happy
drunk_on_LOOOOVE: very
seaking: ATHENA.
Athena Parthenos: Poseidon.
sunboi: soooo
What’s wrong people???
free therapist here yk
seaking: WHY IS HE BACK ATHENA?!
Athena Parthenos: it has been years poseidon
Let. it. Go.
sunboi: so were ignoring the free therapist offer
ok
interested in a calm the heck down lollipop?
seaking: I AM NOT LETTING IT GO AFTER ODYSSEUS STABBED MY SON IN THE EYE
Athena Parthenos: so what?
Your son was ugly anyways.
seaking: GASP
YOU DID NOT SAY THAT
NONONONO
.DFKAKFHSDFAKSDFHKASHFDASHDFKSH
messenger pigeon: bro got so mad he couldn’t even speak properly
drunk_on_LOOOOVE: lmao screenshotted
Athena Parthenos: Stop being childish, Hermes, Dio.
messenger pigeon: hey, listen, im just tryin to break the tension for our readers
Athena Parthenos: what
drunk_on_LOOOOVE: what
sunboi: what
seaking: what
messenger pigeon: what
sunboi: moving on-
You two @seaking and @Athena Parthenos take this to the Dms
Me and Hermes here need to talk privately too.
messenger pigeon: what..?
sunboi: you heard me, messenger boy
dms, now.
messenger pigeon: … sure.
*
sunboi > messenger pigeon
sunboi: why are you hiding from me, hermes?
messenger pigeon: what do you mean?
sunboi: youre avoiding me
You wont even look at me
Hermes
What are you hiding
messenger pigeon: i cant tell you, apollo
sunboi: what do you mean?!
Is someone threatening you?
If they are i swear on the styx im going to toss them in the worst pits of tartarus
messenger pigeon: NO NOTHING LIKE THAT!
I just…
I cant say
sunboi: hermes please
I need to know
I dont want to be like this anymore
messenger pigeon: apollo…
Its supposed to be a secret
sunboi: so?
That’s not as important as us
messenger pigeon: its about artemis
I just thought that, you know,
It wouldnt be fair to tell you to keep it from her
sunboi: i can hide something from her
I swear!
ive gotten better
Tell me
messenger pigeon: alright. Ill tell you
Its about orion
He’s returned.
sunboi: no.
No, no, no, no, no
It cant be
messenger pigeon has sent a video
messenger pigeon: this is the video hephaestus saw on cams
This is why he took so long to respond
im sorry apollo
sunboi: artemis is goig to finds outtr
yuo knwo that riughts???
messenger pigeon: eventually, maybe
but not now.
sunboi: i dont knwo whaat illl do if orion comes back
Wha t if artemis seeshim and brings him to olympus
Thentheyll both hate me
I dont want artemis to hate me
messenger pigeon: apollo thats not going to happen
Shes your sister
she’ll stick by you
I know youre panicking
Want to call?
sunboi: mhm
messenger pigeon started a call that lasted 6 hours
*
messenger pigeon > machines <3
messenger pigeon: hephaestus
machines <3: you told him, didnt you?
messenger pigeon: how did you know?
machines <3: I saw the messages in Dysfuntional Fam
messenger pigeon: well, you’re right
machines <3: do you really believe that he’ll manage to keep it a secret?
messenger pigeon: well it seems he hasnt kept a secret from artemis in a long time
But we dont know, so maybe he has
machines <3: i suppose thats fair
But its just a guess
not fact
messenger pigeon: are you angry?
machines <3: no, no
I should’ve expected it, really
after those issues with the cows were ironed out, you and apollo were inseparable
messenger pigeon: thanks for understanding, hephaestus
machines <3: no problem, brother
~
sorry for not posting but hereeee
#ares#zeus#hermes#hephaestus#posideon#athena#hermapollo#apollo#hermes x apollo#kinda#sorry for not posting#artemis#orion#chat fic#greek mythology#greece#fanfiction
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alright i was planning to put out a big celebratory nublar six fanart for chaos theory day but since its 10 and I'm only done with darius I'm putting a pin in that and instead posting the notes i took at the time while watching the show!!
BIG JURASSIC WORLD CHAOS THEORY SPOILERS AHEAD
I'm going to come out with more sane-sounding analyses and all when i calm down so stick around for that -> for this i was just writing down whatever was in my head while watching but it's still fun!! (italicized the best fragments)
episode 1: - oh my fucking god bens a redditor. my sweet boy what have u done to him - darius calling brooklynn just to hear her voice made me tear up :(( - oh my GOD i missed benrius so so much
episode 2: - HE TURNED HIS VAN INTO A HUGE DORK POUCH AWWW LOVE THIS LITTLE (BIG) GUY - "guess we could've looked that up but… well…" BEN. - WHAT THE FUCK WHATTHEFUCK BEN AND BROOKLYNN WHY ARE U DOING THIS TO ME - SHES SO CUTE…… - im crying,,,, - brookes an investigative journalist awww that fits her so well - them bonding over dark jurrassic i CANNOT - ben being obsessive and dealing with constant anxiety ahhh - darius just called ben 'benjamin' i am in shambles - ohhhwwhbgb theyre fighting over trust and brooklynn and ughghhh my babies - awww bonding over candy i MISSED THEM SO MUCH
episode 3: - SAMMY LIVING ON HER FARM AHH - she doesnt talk to her parents anymore??? girl we all KNOW you care, you loved them SO MUCH?? she sacrificed so much for them what the hell happened - BUMPER CARRRRR SHES HEERREEEEEE - AWWW HER AND BENS REUNION!!!!!!! - ben defending bumpy. also i dont like carlos - SAMMY GIRLIE I LOVE U SO MUCH PLEASE GO SEE A THERAPIST. AVOIDING UR PROBLEMS BY KEEPING URSELF BUSY ISN'T HEALTHY. PLEASE - WHATTHEFUCK WHATTHEFUCK HER SEEING BROOKE I AM IN SHAMBLES - SAMMY GUTTIEREZ. STOP. - THE TEARS IN HER EYES - OH MY GOD IM SOBBING WHAT THE FUCK - "And what, Darius? Stop and think about Brooklynn dying, or my family not speaking to me, or Yaz pulling away from me? No. I… I can't stop. I won't." JESUS FUCGIN CHRSIT WHY - ^ im gonna have to post a whole analysis on this scene because wgat the fuck man - seeing them back in their 'hiding from the dinos' selves fbiudsjkbgfskd - Sammy with Brookes jacket awhghh - ^ also i STILL believe Brooklynns alive I DONT CARE WGAT ANYBODY SAYS PKAEASE - ^^ HHDFUSIGIF - alr this is the 2nd scene involving cars and jumping i have to start counting - ok ths is building up GOOD
episode 4: - ben being emo and sighing so somebody would notice him BROO - THEYRE SO CUTE?? benrius married for the double income shenanigans - YEAH BUMPYS A BOSS SHELL BE FINE - BGFDHUJKH THEYRE ADORABLE - i didn't know i needed benrius conspiring together until we got it - BEN HAS A GIRLFRIEND. !!!! - DARIUSES FLASHBACK SJIT?? - these children. (theyre older than me now i think) - oh my fucking god theyre all so traumatised - DARIUS AND KENJI ARENT ON SPEAKING TERMS. THE HELL. - KENJIIIII HEIII!!! - HES IGNORING HIM. WHAT THE FUVKING HWELL - hes an eat-love-climb kinda guyy - WHYRE THEY FIGHTINGG - oh hes BLAMING DARIUS for brooklynn? KENJI KON WHAT THE FUCK - she went to see daniel?????? why. - SAM CALLING YASMINA ALL THE TIME I - KENJ AND DARIUS WITH TRUST - sammy ranting about yaz doing things she doesn't like i- PLEASE communicate. i beg u creator gods make them actually TALK to each other - "I think we should split up." "gasp you and yaz?!" "what?! noo! us! the three of us!!! …why, did she say somethin'?" OH MY GODSHBKJG HOW BAD IS THEIR SITUATION IM SCARED - sammy just tickled the keys off him - THEY LEFT DARIUS TO DEAL WITH IT. - okay them having the emotional conversation ON THE CLIFFSIDE. ok. - KENJI BROKE UP W HER?? alright were getting dinostar then right - ^ christ man i am too good at guessing these things - DARIUS NOT KNOWING HOW CLIMBING ROPES WORK LMAO - okay B&Kenji were cute im gonna miss them - but Brooklynn ignoring him,,, JUSTIFIES IT. I GET IT KENJ OK - POOR KENJI??? WTF??????????? - OH GODFFDHGFBV AND BEFORE HER DEATH TOO WHY - OKAY i get that i should pay more attention to the dinostar crumbs and all but all i feel rn is sympathy for kenji. hes been done wrong ENTIRELY in this scenario and just. man. - HTEY GOT BUMPY
episode 5: - aiaiai darius babY PLEASE - make them COMMUNICATE. PKEAFEEE - kenji calls ds mom more than he does whagthehellman - SAMS STILL CALLING YAZ AGHHH - OK THE TEARS IN HER EYES STOP IT - her and 'benjamin' bickering AHH - SHES SOOOO GIRLBOSS I LOVE LVOE HER - WTF THAT GUYS AN ASSHOLE?? - aaand THEYRE FREEING THE DINOS! - FHUCkin daniel kon - AHH THEYRE SO CUTESY - BEN SUSPECTING SAMMY. AND JUST SAMMY. WHAT THE FUCK - 'but i promise, I do trust you. now.' OOOHHHH MY SWEET SWEET DUDEEE. FUCK U - i get WHY i GUESSS, with his paranoia and all but thats an ASSHOLE move - daniel and kenji ermmbnbgvjsdk - HES TRYING TO MANIPULATE HIM AGAAAINN DUDE ITS GETTING BORING - w6AT. TF. KENJI - ooh the good ol dino chase!! - SAMMY BEING A GOOD FIGHTER AWHGHH - WFAH THAT SCARED ME - ok they made up!! - I KNEW THIS GUY WAS AWFUL - OKAYYYYY KENJ YESSS TALK ABOUT IT!!! FINALLYYYY COMMUNICATIONNNN - YESWSS AHDJFSN THEYRE TALKING - I LOVE THIS SO MUCH TEARS FLOWING DOWN MY CHEEKS AHFGDS - I HATE THIS FUCKING GUY AIGERG SDFJ - YES KENJI GO OFF BITCH!!!!!! - brooke… whatttth, - TF WAS SHE DOING - OH MY FUCKING GOD THE SCREAM I SCREAMT WHEN I SAW THIS DINOSAUR CONTROLLING PERSON NIGHTMARE FUCKING FUEL - WHAT THE FGUCK WHYS SHE SO UNCANNY VALLEY I LITTERALLY JUMPED AND MOVED AWAY IMMEDIATELY - oh he doesnt die :( - still WHO IS THAT?? - oh he does die :) - fr tho - KENJI POOR BABY IM SO SORRY. as if he didnt go through enough already.. - WHY TEHGFHBVCKJS OH WHO ARE U U EERIE FUCKIN - is kenj having a panic attack!!!! - BCFHSDKJFBJKDBFKJVX THEYRE SO CUFKING SCARY WHY ARE THEIR MOVEMENTS SO MECHANICAL - KENJI SAYING お父さん NOW I AM DDYING. I WILL NOT RECOVER.
episode 6: - SHITTTT YAZ'S HEREEE - ohhhh fuck shes dealing with A LOT - DARLING U OK??? - THE FLASHBACKS ARE TERRIFYING - shes so pretty!!!! - BROOKLYNN BITCH WHTWS FD - THEYRE SOOOOO CUTEEEEE - I LOVE HOW YAZS MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES HAVE BEEN AND STILL ARE PORTRAYED - I'm SO glad to see her dealing with everything and slowly getting over some of her trauma - ooh ok YAZ AND SAMMY - THEYRE SO HSGDIUF - okay so the solution to the problem is. TALK. its just. TALK TO EACH OTHER. - AWHH OK SHES NOT READY I SUPPOSEE - SHIT sam bb i get protecting the ones u love. but u shouldnt hide things from ur gf just so she doesnt feel bad. especially things so huge. - AND YAZ. babygirl. you shouldn't avoid your gf if shes doing something ure uncomfortable with. you shouldn't ignore her and make her feel bad abt it. YASAMY. THIS IS AN INTERVENSION. TALK TO EACH OTHER. ACTUALLY. PLEASE - ^ this is me showing how much im loving this storyline. VERY annoyed. love angst in fav ships. GOTTA HAVE SOME SPICE ONCE IN A WHILE I GET IT - ^^ but if they break up im killing myself - sammY PLEASEEFH DONT ASSUME JUST TALK. PTSD/MENTAL HEALTH IN GENERAL ISNT THAT SIMPLE - theyre both doing wrong things AND I JUST AGHHH -ALTHOUGHH when they finally DO communicate itll be SOO satysfying - EEEE HERE THEY AREEEEEEE - awkward. a little. BUT SWEET - OK NO I CHANGED MY MIND THEYRE SOOOO CUTEEEE - and ben and yazs friendship AGHGHHHG - therapy island. awh okayy!! - YAZS SO PASSIONATE I LOVE IT - 'ohohohhh… let me show u!… benny boy' - this is GOOD. it IS impressive!! - SAMMY STOP IT - YES YASMINA TALK ABOUT IT - I AM LOVING THIS OH MY GOD - JESUS CHRIST BEN - NAH WHAT THE FUCK - WHY. BENJAMIN. - yasammyyyyyy i love u to hell and back WHY R U LIKE THIS - ben&yaz bonding!!!! - YEAHHH SHES HAPPY FOR UUUU - THE BESTIESSSS - OH MY GOD THE FUCKING DINOSAURS ALWAYS RUIN EVERYTHING - ohhh this isnt good!!! - OHHKAY THE GUYS DEAD WHAT THE FUCK - jumping car scene count: 3 - 'big bens got moves' SHE SAID THE LINE - i feel like DPW is gonna play a bigger role in this - ^AND IM RIGHT. - WGAT THE FUCNK
episode 7: - OHKAY WHATS GOING ON - theyre up buttt….. what the hell r they gonna do. they either drown or get eaten by a dino. - YASAMMMYYYYY I MISSED U SO MUCH - AND THEYRE SPEAKING AND SHJOWING AND HFUDSI - okay KENJIS HABING A PANIC ATTACK I AM - quick break to say the mental health representation and how its done in this show is one of the best examples on how to portray mentally unwell characters I've seen lately - WTF DOES THIS GUY HAVE TO DO WITH THIS - bens soggy van is what ure complaining about rn guttierez??? - OK THE SCENE OF BS DEATH I CANT IM SOBBING - them both reaching for the phone ok. - THEYRE ALIVE, - YASAMMYS BACK OFFICIALLY PEOPLE I AM SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP - ben respectfully i love u but that van wouldve died of old age in a matter of a week - SHE HAD A PLACE - he finally got to throw them phones away - I AM SCREAMING OVER THESE YASAMMY MOMENTS IM AHGFSFJSV - 'oh i am so gonna hunt them from beyond the grave' yasmina fadoula will u marry me - oh right they dont have their phones so theyre not gonna be able to find each other - ok so if im picking up what theyre putting down correctly brooklynn was investigating illegall DPW dinosaur dropoffs?? - cant tell if kenjis coming to terms with it or being jealous - WHAT THE FUCK OK SHE EITHER GOT REALLY INTO THAT INVESTIGATING OR SHES ACTUALLY WENT CRAZY - ok this kenji sequence questioning scene was amazing
episode 8: - wgat the aHELL wr they doin - ok darius and kenji awkwardly connecting. good - ^and darius being protective around kenj over brooklynns phone since he left so many voicemails that he doesnt want him to hear? jesus christ man - OKAY my favourite little trio in a truck with a dinosaur chat do we think theyll survive this - tbh the amount of times in these kids lives where the probablity of survival was scary low is. er. sad - ^ not only for them cause of trauma and stuff but for the random bg characters - dude dies after seeing a dino ONCE but six random kids? yeah theyll survive DOZENS without help - quickly ill just say we need a name for the lesbians and their emotional support muscle wall. their dynamic is superb - the kenji and brooklynn video I LOVE THEM - BABYTALK - . POOKIE BEAR. KENJI WENJI. - shit fuckballs they're fighting again - darius. just. talk? - YES THIS IS GOOD TOO THIS IS GOOD - that CAN be a coping mechanism i GUESSS - what. who r u - DPW BOSS? - YEAH I THOUGHT THEYD FALL FOR THAT AGAIN THANK GOD - YOU WERE IN WHAT WITH WHO NOW - ^WHAT THHFSDN - ^^I WAS EXPECTING THIS HIGHKEY BUT STILL - ^^^ its good that he told kenji about this - ^^^^ and its GREAT that kenji's understanding - is this THE video??? - SHE IS WHAT NOW - maybe this is how they get to take these dinos away?? by pretending the dinos are dead in the face of the law?? - 'ooh heyyy!. boo.' I LOVE U GUYS - it IS the video. - OK BUT A LITTLE BIT LONGER - if i was in dariuses place i would NEVER recover - KENJI RESPECTFULLY DON;T - ^DONT BLAME HIM???? - please dont let this be the scary lady - YEAH KENJ ATLEAST URE RESPECTFUL - whats going on with bumpy. - YASAMMMY I WANNA INJECT U INTO MY VEINS - SHESAIDTHELINESHESAIDTHELINE - ^ 'wanna make a little chaos?' WHAT IF I DIE. WHAT IF I DIE YASMINA. WHAT THEN. - 'maybe. maybe not!!!!' BABIES?? - r the dinos drugged or controlled with the same method the inhumane ladys using - ^or are they tranqued out of their minds. idk. - OH SHIT? THEY SHOULDNT KILL AT THE WATERING HOLE guess it isnt really that is it - BENJAMIN NO
episode 9: - now SAMMYS anxiety's spiking - ok bens gonna not die hopefully?? - i love them stalking. the little creepers. hehe - BUMPER CARRR WHATS GOING ON - ^ is she drugged or smth :((( - ^^^maybe shes pregnant?? but idk idk i dont think so - ^^^^ fucking forshadowing - ^^^^^ i sincerely hope its more positive than im thinking - COMMUNICATION!!!!!!!! YESSSS!!! - theyre the cutest!!!! Yasammy charades level teamwork!!!!! - ok i love both the teams - kenji and darius sticking up for each other despite everything. DO THEY WANNA MAKE ME SUFFER - the kon puns im crying - KENJI HELPING DARIUS CLIMB IM SCREAMING - ok quick intermission i LOVE yazs design shes so cute - hndsgjkb JUST FIND EACH OTHER ALREADY - BENJAMIN CMON U GOTTA SAVE HER - 'Are you dying?' WHATRF ESDGUHKUFDGKJBFDXBFVGBUFIDCFGVBKJSDXBC K EFAHBUISDAGEBDBWAUISDFK - ^ NO - ^^ NO - ^^^ NOOOOOOO - WHATTTTTFDSDGJBMGDF - SHE CANT BE - ILL SOB MY EYES OUT I SWEAR TO GOD - BEN HIDING AND CRYING I - I FEEL U IM DOING THE SAME EXACT THING RN - OKAY THEY KNOW NOW - yaz&sammy&kenji&darius reunion1!!!!1! - ^ AND WHERES BEN - BUMPY. U STRONG STRONG WOMAN. I WANT U TO KNOW THAT IF U DIE. I WILL TOO. - IM GONNA KILL MYSLEF/.
(this i fear is where i realise that im going insane)
- CREEPY MICRO BANGS IS AN AMAZING NAME FOR UNCANNY VALLEY WOMAN YEAH - yeah atp i think weve all figured out its an illegal dino selling business - wGAT - yeah WTF WAS SHE DOING - 'no talk. come quick. bumpys dying.' IM FUCKING DYING TOO!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS SHIT OH MY GOD - BUMPER CAR DO NOT. PLEASE. DONT. - WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I WAS RIGHT - ^ WTF WTF I - thats an egg. - DONT THINK ABOUT IT BUD.
episode 10: - these kids r so traumatised they do not need this - IS SHE RLY DEAD…. - ok so its two separate factors i think?? DPW on one side, creepy micro bangs on the other. right? - ^ this is delving DEEP into the mystery factor… - BEN WTF!!!!! DONT JUST??? DO THAT???????? - OMFG SHES HERE - ^ I HATE HER IHATEHERIHATEHER - SHES WHY THE DINOS R ACTING WEIRD - WHY IS SHE SO FUCKING UNCANNY I CANNOT - ^ SHES LIKEA CARNIVORE DINOSAUR IF IT WAS A HUMAN - ok so SHES the real boss. the unresponsive. wide eyed. controlling dinosaurs. microbangs. woman. - SWHE KILLED BROOKLYNN. - ^ WHAT THE FUCK. - im ngl i DID kinda dig her vibe but AFTER HEARING THIS I JUST CAngfijbdsuif FUCK U - who THE HELL - GET UR FREAKY ASS BOB AWAY - BRUH PUT THAT FUCKING WHISTLE DOWN - IM GOING TO HAVE NIGHTMARES OVER THIS LADY - WHAT THE - theyre way too lucky who the hell is driving that truck - i feel like atleast ONE of them shoulda got injured in that fall - OH MATEO!!!! HI BB - OOP CREEPY BANGS DEAD YIPPEE - AND THEYRE ALL GOING BAZONKAS?? BC SHES UNRESPONSIVE I PRESUME? - ALWAYS THE MFING RAPTORS - okay theyre definitely coca in the loca - WGAT TJR FJCUK EPIC EXPLOSION TYRANNOSAURUS REX - ^ R U SLASH J OR SRS RN - JESUS I LOVE THESE KIDs - where's yaz. - SAMMY!!! - 'Hey, Stripey! Leave. My girl. Alone!' YTHIS IS WHY I HATE THIS FUCKING SHOW /affectionate - AND THE ALMOST KISS HALF HUG IM KMS - WHY R THEY LIKE THIS - HES LETTING THE ALLOSAURUS OUT???? HUHHHHHHH - DARIUS BOWMAN. - IS HE - IS HE FUCKING - SERIOUS RN - jesus christ this BOY. this BOY man. - DIE - DDDDIIIIIEEEEEE - what tf!!!! the broker??? - we still dont know the creepy bangs name…. - so we're getting a 2nd season right - AWW YASAMMY SHOT - HWRFIUSDHGSFDKHAWVBSDXCZKJLGDHSFKLJGBJKESRDFJ - WHYSDHIFUJDIGVBDFS - WHEN I TELL U I JUMPED I MEAN I JJJUUUUMMMMPPPEEEEDDDD - THIS EERIE ASS BITCH KEEPS ON SHOWING UP WHEN I DONT EXPECT IT - DONT GET ME WRONG - PEAK CHARACTER DESIGN - AND THE LOOK ITSELF IS RLY CUTE AND ALL - BUT IF I SAW A BITCH THAT LOOKED AND BEHAVED LIKE THIS I WOULDVE SCREAMED MY INTESTINES OUT AND RAN ALL THE WAY TO AUSTRALIA - THE CREEPIEST CHARACTER IVE SEEN IN YEARS IM AFRAID - oh she still cares about her dinos!!! this makes her a little more human - a little less scary - ok - her movements r less mechanical more affectionate now - less hvfudignb BIGBFI SHE JUST TURNED - thank GOD shes gone - theyre me - 'well that was… unnerving' WELL SAID - YASAMMY HUG!! - YEAHHHH THE LOOK!! - the regular schmegular 'let's save the day' speech. we gotchu darius!! - GASPPP - ok so UNREQUITED dinostar - OH MY GHRHSIUDF THATS SO FUCKING SAD - DARIUS MY BABY I - YEAH!! SHOW UP!!!!! - ofc they are????? - it IS a very brooklynn thing to fo - you kon count him in too!!! - LMAO MATEO I LOVE YOU - YUP YUP BUMPER CAR NEEDS CARE AND SAFETY - IS THIS THE END??? - please give me atleast one more cryptic scene - OH SHES IN ON IT TOO?/BG - bgiudsfgtbfseruifdgkdfx - I FUCKING TOLDF U - I TOLD U ALL - I SAID IT FIRST - HGIUDFSOI;GT;ERASFOICXLBVNIPGRSD - SHE LOST AN ATM - SHES ALIVE - THIS IS WHAT IVE BEEN FUCKING TALKINHG ABOUT - TOLD U SHE COULDNT BE DEAD I MEAN. ITS BROOKLYNN.
(ok all in all. this was. an experience. gonna leave it at that and go take a nap)
#jwct spoilers#jurrassic world chaos theory#jwct#darius bowman#brooklyn jwcc#yasmina fadoula#sammy gutierrez#ben pincus#kenji kon#get ready for a bunch of analyses and all cause MAN#this hyperfixation will last for quite some time
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Averygrayson Headcanons Before Bed!!
yes, i ship avery and grayson. i don't think jameson is all that. no, i do not think he is a cheater. i know that averyjameson is already endgame. please don't come at me in the comments/reblogs.
(read my ao3 fic This Game Can't Last Forever (by zinnias_on_venus) for more averygrayson content from me, i update at least once a week)
OK TO THE HEADCANONS
• Avery and Grayson love to travel together. Grayson takes a bunch of photos, and its perfect because Avery adores sight seeing.
• Both of them have a tendency to overwork themselves, so sometimes the other will force them to take a break from Foundation work.
• Speaking of the Foundation, they share an office and they always leave each other little notes on their desks.
• Grayson loves coffee, so Avery always makes him a cup in the mornings.
• They read books together (romance, mystery, historical fiction, you name it) and have really heated (in more ways than one) discussions about the plot and characters.
• Grayson always takes Avery to different plays and musicals. Though not always Broadway, sometimes it's just the local theatre group performing!
• More often then not, they fall asleep cuddling on the couch.
• Grayson loves shopping for Avery.
• He buys her so many clothes, she had to use a second closet.
• On their travel journeys, they always visit poorer cities/countries and donate a bunch of stuff to them.
• Grayson especially loves the kids, and Avery thinks its adorable.
• Avery sometimes gets Grayson to read her children's books, and she thinks it's the funniest thing when he does the voices.
• For her twenty-first birthday, Grayson, with the help of all his brothers, organized a House-wide scavenger hunt, where with each clue there was a gift.
• The final gift was Toby. Grayson had Zabrowski distract E*e while he snuck Toby out. He also had all the contracts burned (don't ask how, Hawthorne magic), so Toby was free.
• Avery cried so much, and she kept thanking Grayson everytime she saw Toby.
• Whenever Avery gets hate comments, Grayson absolutely destroys the person on his NonErrata575 account (he can't use his main one or else he'll get cancelled or some shit idk).
• Avery got him to wear the leather pants again. That's all I'm going to say.
• They shower together, but nothing sexual. Just wash each other's hair and other coupley fluffy stuff.
• Bubble. Baths.
• They both like to swim, and Grayson teaches Avery his favorite strokes.
• Grayson is a better swimmer, but Avery is better at diving and tricks because she used to do gymnastics before her mom died.
• Avery LOVES hanging out with Gigi and Savannah. They drag Grayson along on their girl time though, sometimes, because he's basically "one of the girls" (Gigi said it first) (my friend calls a bunch of boys at my school this)
• They make a gingerbread house together every Christmas Eve, and then eat it while drinking hot chocolate and watching Home Alone (they do it religiously every year).
• Not really Avery and Grayson, but Nash is basically both of their therapists (like they go to him when they need help, not like couples counseling lol).
• Grayson sometimes has really bad days when all he can hear in his head is Em*ly telling him he's not good enough and will never be worthy of Avery.
• He gets really depressed and doesn't talk to Avery, or anyone, at all.
• When that happens, Avery gives him his space, but at night she always makes sure to give him extra kisses and cuddles, and tell him she loves him.
• It always makes him feel better.
• Every year for his birthday, Avery gets him a personalized mug, pen, and a new tie (he loves practical gifts).
• They go on double-dates with Max and Xander, and sometimes Nash and Libby.
• Beach trips every summer. Avery and Grayson absolutely love the summer heat and tropical beaches.
• Grayson also sometimes sets up one of those little fancy tent things that companies do for like couples (idk what they're called but if you've seen one you'll know what I'm talking about), and sometimes Avery does it for him.
• They get a cat to keep Tiramisu company, and name it Canolli.
• They're both allergic to birds.
• Avery makes him wear color suits sometimes (shocker I know).
• Grayson has like an Atlantic accent, which he copied from TV, but sometimes his country slips (kinda like Young Sheldon), and Avery always tries to record those moments.
• Grayson and Libby actually become really good friends because of Avery, and bond over their love of their siblings and cooking/baking.
• Same with Avery and Nash, except they bond over how they like to keep a simple life (for the most part), and didn't really care about having billions.
• Grayson never drinks when Avery does, he needs to make sure he's 100% sober in case she needs him (Grayson would drink, but he can hold his liquor well and doesn't drink a lot).
That's it cause I actually have to sleep now lol, hope you liked them!!
#the inheritance games#the final gambit#the hawthorne legacy#the brothers hawthorne#avery x grayson#averygrayson#avery kylie grambs#grayson davenport hawthorne#the grandest game#jlb#jennifer lynn barnes
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🎵 & platonic love
warning that i am notorious for sending love songs to people and being like "this but not romantic" sooooo (ft. very VERY brief blurbs)
send me 🎵 and a feeling/mood and I'll make you a lil playlist
playlist under the cut <3
FEELS LIKE by Gracie Abrams / I love this song soooo much and was soooo excited when I found out this was literally written about her (platonic) best friend.
WITH YOU by Colorfire / When my friends and I "graduated" from 8th grade, one of them made a video of our friend group to this song and I still go back and watch it sometimes.
I GOT YOU by Leona Lewis / when I was in middle school I watched a fanvid of Brennan and Angela to this song and I think about it constantly (it also made me love this song). I CANNOT FIND IT and it KILLS ME.
FOR GOOD by Idina Menzel & Kristin Chenoweth / Don't get me wrong, Wicked is gay, but this is a platonic love song (and to me, that adds to its beauty).
WHAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT YOU by Drew Holcomb & the Neighbors / Such a sweet song that I sometimes hear when I look at my friends.
HAS ANYONE EVER WRITTEN ANYTHING FOR YOU by Stevie Nicks / someone gave this to me in high school and it broke me (in a beautiful way) :)
HOPE UR OK by Olivia Rodrigo / this song is so me, it's why for a long time I didn't know if I could be a teacher/therapist... the way I miss people forever and have to let them go.
CALL ME ON YOUR WAY HOME by Emily James / I love this song soooo much because it's so me! Things I'd say, written about my college town... and I know it could be romantic too, but it's pretty platonic to me.
SATELLITE CALL by Sara Bareilles / any reason to recommend this song ever.
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