#its not high school anymore she deserves better

[shvroyism]

they need to stop including Brooke in Lucas’ annoying love dilemmas. FREE MY GIRL!!!

[heliads]

I love you writing and I was hoping you could write Ben Florian x VK!Reader the reader is Lefou's kid. A soulmate AU where the negative things you think about yourself are marked on your soulmate's skin. Reader only has one or two things because Ben is from Auradon and has a good life and family. While Ben has around half a dozen. Reader is the one who gives Ben the love potion. During the lake scene they notice Ben is their soulmate and tries (but fails) to hide it thinking he deserves better

masterlist

There really is no good place for a prince. They are political figureheads in every sense of the phrase— too young to actually rule, too old to be allowed to skip state functions. They sit in corners of expensive meetings and cut ribbons in front of newly opened buildings, but they can’t do a whole lot except smile and pose. 

Shame your friend seems so fixated on capturing one, then. It feels like you’ve just barely left the Isle of the Lost, only bid farewell to the entirety of your prior life experience hours ago, and yet already Mal is scheming about how to best tear down everything around you. If Prince Ben is the best way to fulfill her nefarious plans, then so be it.

The only problem is that you’re now involved in all of this, too. Mal wants a wand and so she’ll take a prince to get there, but as one of her best friends, you’ve been drafted into the plot to catch a prince. Ben won’t have any idea what’s coming. Shame, he would probably run if he had any clue.

Mal’s good at covering her tracks, though, she always has been. You can remember elaborate plans from when you were much younger to steal cookies or cloaks, spellbooks and shoes. At this point, hearing Mal tell you that she’s going to bewitch the crown prince of Auradon into falling in love with her shouldn’t surprise you, just the fact that she’s taken this long to come up with the idea.

Usually, you have no problem going along with Mal’s little adventures. They’re entertaining, at the least, a good way to pass a few days when you’ve already gone over every alleyway and hiding place on the Isle at least a dozen times in the last month. The issue is that you’re not on the Isle anymore, and maybe– just maybe– disrupting everything here isn’t entirely what you want to do.

Mal doesn’t know this, of course. None of your fellow VKs do. Every time they monologue and moan about how they can’t wait to get out of this place, you find yourself holding your tongue, biting back your real thoughts about how the school isn’t actually as bad as you feared. Sure, the constant judgment from the other children of princes and princesses isn’t all that fun, but Auradon Prep has its positives, too. For one thing, you think your soulmate might be here.

What a terrible thing for the child of a villain to prioritize. You’ve heard Mal scoff at the idea of a soulmate, and although Evie is certainly more interested in the idea than some of your other friends, you’re still not sure that you’d find a welcome audience amongst their ranks when it comes to tracking down your soulmate. After all, the odds of that soulmate being from Auradon and not the Isle are pretty high. They’ve all but told you that themselves.

All things considered, for a society with such control over magic and spells, it’s pretty difficult to find your soulmate. You’d always wondered why those in charge couldn’t shorten the whole affair to something more simple– a name on the wrist, perhaps, or an invisible string that only the two of you could see– but instead, soulmate magic went the complicated route. How lovely.

The story about the origin of the soulmate magic is convoluted and ancient, going back generations and changing with each family. The general consensus is that soulmates were created to preserve the sanctity of true love, with the idea that soulmates should be able to love each other entirely, flaws and all. So, when you think something negative about yourself, those very same thoughts will show up on the skin of your soulmate, something like a warning label for what they’re going to get themselves into.

This is all well and good for people with few negative thoughts, maybe they’ll have something here and there about a bad sports result or a poor test grade that their soulmate can chuckle over before meeting them. For you, though? You, the child of a villain, cursed to live forever on a too-small island with the other convicts and criminals, you have had more fears and hated things about yourself than most. Your soulmate must be covered in unhappy musings, which only makes you feel worse about yourself than before. A self-perpetuating cycle of the worst kind.

By contrast, the startling absence of your soulmate’s negative thoughts on your own skin makes you certain that they couldn’t be from the Isle of the Lost. There are only one or two fears on your skin, proof of loving parents and a stable home, and they’re minor things like a bad hair day or a fear of not doing their absolute best. These change, often leaving every few months to be replaced by something else insignificant.

What makes you most certain that your soulmate is the child of a royal is the one negative thought that has stayed on your skin since the very beginning. Your soulmate, whoever they are, is terrified that they will let down the king and queen. Only someone with close ties to the royalty could have such a fear, so it’s proof that your soulmate is somewhere here on Auradon.

So maybe you don’t want to leave this place, not yet. Not until you can learn who your soulmate is. It’ll be almost impossible to track them down on this information alone, but supposedly that’s how the whole thing is supposed to work. You learn about the worst parts of your soulmate, and then you get to love the best of them. The only problem is that you’re fairly sure that if your soulmate is a royal, they won’t want to love you at all.

It’s easier to ignore the whole affair. Easier to agree to Mal’s plan when she proposes enchanting Prince Ben. At least another one of your friend’s schemes will keep your mind off the soulmate affair.

That’s what you tell yourself, at least, but your conscience is starting to get steadily more vocal as the days go by. Ben is a nice guy, which hurts, surprisingly. Although the love spell may have been cast on Mal, as one of Mal’s closest friends, you’re around the two of them all the time. The boy you see is someone that you wish could be your soulmate. He may be a prince, and you may be a villain, but he makes you want to believe in love after all.

You certainly have the capacity for such musings. For some reason, the love spell didn’t take all that well, and although Ben is now compelled to stay with Mal more than he was before, it’s not like he’s totally obsessed with her as Mal had hoped. Mal claims it’s because love spells can never work fully due to the soulmate issue, like having a soulmate is a kind of shield to protect you against that sort of enchantment, but regardless, Ben has just enough independent thought that he can tell you jokes and try to make you smile like– well, like he tries to do with Mal.

The realization that Ben is a genuinely good person, and worse, someone you don’t want to trick, haunts you as you fall further into Mal’s scheme. You’ve been trying to push the whole thing from your mind, letting Ben join your soulmate in the depths of your mind you don’t want to touch, but your train of thought keeps circling back to him despite your best attempts otherwise.

Besides, it doesn’t help that Mal keeps trying to involve you in the plot. Right now, the two of them are at the Enchanted Lake, out on a cute little date. Mal had been making mock disgusted faces at you the whole time she was getting ready, but some part of yourself can’t stop whispering that this doesn’t seem so bad, actually, that the thought of being out here alone with Ben would make for a wonderful day instead of the tedious chore Mal is making it out to be.

Ben doesn’t know you’re here, though. Mal wanted backup in case something happened, so you’re lingering in the woods to keep anyone from stumbling upon the scene and also holding onto more magical baked goods in case Mal feels the need to renew the spell. It’s kind of like torture, strolling through this beautiful forest, knowing that Ben is so close and you are helping hold him under the thrall of this plot.

The storm in your mind must be thundering too loudly for you to think straight, because you lose track of yourself and accidentally walk too close to the lake. You weren’t supposed to be spotted, but before you can back away and melt back into the foliage, Ben looks up and sees you. You panic, immediately heading the way you’d come, but you hear footsteps after you moments later and Ben manages to track you down before you can go too far. Mal is so going to kill you for messing with her plan.

“Sorry,” you murmur, eyes wide when he finally catches up to you, “I didn’t realize the two of you were– I’ll go now.”

Ben shakes his head. “No, no, it’s alright. It’s not like we have a monopoly on the woods.”

He’s dripping water, most likely due to a recent dip in the lake, and you can’t seem to stop your gaze from following the path of the droplets as they cascade down his shoulders, across his hands, and, most importantly of all, over the swooping letters of the fears of his soulmates. 

Usually, Ben wears long sleeves or something else to hide them. You can see why now– there are many of them, many more than you, perhaps half a dozen in all. You can’t read all of them from where you’re standing, just snippets about how a villain’s kid shouldn’t have a soulmate, how they’ll never amount to much, things like that. Things like what you’ve been thinking recently.

Ben must catch on to your train of thought, because he smiles weakly, absentmindedly scratching at a sentence proclaiming that his soulmate isn’t worth the good luck they get. “Yeah, my soulmate’s a little stressed, I guess. Hopefully, I can talk about that with them soon. I want them to know that they’re worth it, wherever they are.”

It had never occurred to you that hating yourself would make your soulmate this obsessed. You have no proof that Ben is your soulmate but– 

But, as you watch, you can see a new fear appearing out of nowhere, wrapping itself around Ben’s left wrist. I’m not good enough for a soulmate this good. Just what you were thinking mere moments ago. It’s like proof.

Ben looks up slowly, and although you were never blessed with the ability to read minds, you swear you can tell exactly what he’s thinking right now. “Are you–” he starts, ends, tries again, “Do you know who your soulmate is?”

You can do several things at this moment. You can confirm what you’re mostly sure is true, you can lie, you can pretend you hadn’t heard him. You spot movement in the trees behind him, a flash of purple, and remember belatedly that Mal is still somewhere at the Enchanted Lake, waiting for Ben to come back and wondering why you’re holding him here for so long.

All of a sudden, the reality of the situation comes crashing down around your shoulders. This is not something that can happen. Ben is a prince. You are the child of a villain, and the friend of another VK who’s counting on you to continue fooling Ben so she can pursue her latest mad plan. There is no world in which this works out.

So, you force a smile, banishing all thoughts back into the deep recesses of your brain once more. “No,” you say, “I don’t know. I think they’re a VK, though.”

Ben’s face falls in a flash. “Really? Because I thought–”

You shake your head quickly. “I don’t– it’s not me. I think Mal is waiting for you, though. You shouldn’t keep her for long.”

Ben glances back over his shoulder in memory of the girl he’s left somewhere in the woods behind him, and when he looks back, you’re gone. You’re good at running. It’s a skill you’ve perfected over the years. You just never thought you’d have to use it now.

Prince Ben is your soulmate. Impossible. True. Mal comes back later that afternoon, tells you the date went splendidly despite your accidental intrusion. Ben must not have let the brief moment in the woods faze him for long. It hurts more than you care to admit.

There is only so much running a VK can do, try as they might to pretend otherwise. You avoid Ben at all costs, hoping that whatever foolish war is currently being fought inside your heart will come to a tolerable ceasefire if you just ignore it long enough. Mal tells you that the plan is going swimmingly, she’s never seen the prince more excited about the VKs and the upcoming coronation. You nod and smile and tell her that you’re glad everything is going to plan, but inside, you cannot seem to stop your mind from screaming. 

And then, all of a sudden, despite your best attempts to remain out of sight, Prince Ben finds you. It’s completely out of the blue, so casual that you almost don’t realize it’s happening until he’s sitting down at your table in the library and it’s too late to run. 

You feel like an animal caught in a trap. He’s just smiling like nothing is the matter. “I know it’s you,” he says by way of hello. 

Your heart is stuck in your throat. “What?”

“I know it’s you,” Ben repeats, “I know you’re my soulmate. I had the Fairy Godmother do a little spell so I could check for you, but I think I knew since that day at the lake.”

You frown. “You can do that?”

He shrugs, looking a little embarrassed. “Not everyone can, I think. But I, uh, insisted.”

You grin. “Prince privileges?”

“Something like that.” He’s smiling, though, maybe pleased that you’re not trying to run off this time. “But you knew even without the spell, didn’t you?”

That does shake your uncertain sense of calm. “Yes,” you admit, “but I didn’t think you— I didn’t think it would work out.”

The look on Ben’s face is genuinely heartbreaking. “What, just because I’m a prince?”

He says it so casually, it’s almost funny. “Yes, Ben, because you’re a prince and I’m a VK. I mean, my dad was Lefou. He literally tried to ruin the happy ever after of your parents, why would you want someone like me to be your soulmate?”

“Same reason you shouldn’t be afraid to want me. You’re not your father, Y/N, and I’m not my parents. We’re just us, and I know that I want you to be my soulmate. I have since the start. I was hoping you would tell me you knew, but after a few days went by and you still said nothing, I figured I had to take matters into my own hands. Even if that meant using a spell or two.”

You keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, for him to laugh in your face and tell you it’s ridiculous to think that he would ever want a VK as a soulmate, but he doesn’t. In fact, you don’t think he ever will. As impossible as it seems, Ben wants someone who isn’t from a perfect fairy tale. He wants you. And that, lovely and wonderful and absolutely crazy, sounds like a fairly good happily ever after for you. 

disney tag list: @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @mayfieldss, @eclliipsed

[luciferanalyzestar]

Live Reaction: Ghostfuckers

Spoilers of course. I still hate the title of this episode. 0/10 for that alone. This post is just my unfiltered thoughts.

Look the other WLW couple in the Hellaverse! Forgot their names though.

Me thinking about how this show is slowly going downhill. /lhj Why is Blitz 'sulking' over Stolass?? Out of all the characters, he is sulking over the classist asshole who fetishize him for his species.

Man, I wish we saw more of that hard work. Not "yaoi." that overstayed its welcome. There is that Helluva cringe I love so much. /s

Ew. Blitz is fucking nasty. Ugh. More unfunny sexual jokes.

The American™️ experience.

Good!! Stolas is again, a classist species fetishizer. I do not Blitz that much, but he deserved someone better than the owl fucker. He needs to go to therapy first though.

Loona's attitude is fucking weird. She is 22 years old, why she calling Millie who is around 25-30 years old "grandma"??? If she was a teenager that would make sense, but she is an adult. Her insults suck pure ass. Like her calling Mooxie 'fat'. Send her ass back to that pound. /lhj

The word of the day is: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

Viv and the other writers need to learn new swear words.

The sex jokes are so bad. They are not even at high school level, more like middle schooler who laughs when seeing Bitch in the dictionary level.

This show overuses bitch too. There is no PUNCH to it anymore. It is like a sound bit at this point. I love this old man. Why does Blitz tell Mille to "Look out, he's a patriot!" like it is bad thing? He is a true definition of one unlike a certain party.

The song sucks. They truly peaked in Ozzie's and never returned to that level. YES MILLIE! Tell Blitz how you truly feel. That piece of shit has not paid you in weeks and was too busy buying cheap trash.

Remind of me of that faceless Squall moment in Final Fantasy VIII. I Never played the games though. I just know about it thanks to horror youtubers. I love me some good body horror. They finally took Blitz's mom out of the fridge. I am sorry but this scene is making me laugh. Her eye popping out is looks goofy. It like a zany cartoon from the 90s.

Backstory time? The dialogue is not natural in this scene. Blitz is saying some self-hating stuff and Millie is going "Do you remember" like she is Earth, Wind, and Fire. Imagine venting to someone about hating yourself and that you destroy everything you touch, and they say, "Remember how we met?" Blitz's response would be mines. "What?"

"Imps don't work for themselves, asshole."

I wish that show was still about this. A person from a lower class trying to work his way to the top. If that show would be more impactful and would be remember as the edgy demon show with an inspiring message that everyone would relate to or inspire to be. Not the sex joke obsessed demon show with awful writing and the main "appeal" is rotten yaoi. Anyway, the fight scene was fine. Loona looks off model when she has an happy expression. I am used to that aloof and pissed off expression she always have.

"He's my best friend."

Blitz is your best friend?? This is the most time y'all interacted with each other on scene. This is the first conversation Mille and Blitz has ever had. We are almost done with Season two by the way.

This show just loves to traumatize Blitz. I wish he relived his traumatizing experiences in a more natural way. Like seeing certain objects or hearing certain sounds makes him hyperventilate or sends him into the beginning of a panic attack. I have no issues with characters having trauma or PTSD, but it seems like Blitz's trauma is a part of his character to make him seem more interesting as the protag instead of telling how trauma can truly change and mold a person into something different. There are just sprinkles of this. Blitz puts a facade of being an foul mouthed asshole because he does not want to get attached to people, from the trauma of killing his own mother, and etc. I wish it was not this Clockwork Orange type shit. This is 100% a post for another day.

"Your level of insecurity is intoxicating." Rolando should visit the Hazbin hotel. The insecurity levels are off the charts in that place. /lhj "Tonight I'm Blitz Demon-Dicker!" That is pure cringe right there.

Blitz trying to have sex with the M&Ms was always creepy to me because the idea of a boss trying to sleep with his employees is gross. Stick to signing their paychecks, not being in-between their sheets. Blitz being jealousy of their relationship is fine; it should never have crossed into sexual territory.

Episode rating: 7.5/10

None of the jokes made me laugh which is the usual for me. That Blitz's mom scene is unintentional comedy though. Rewatching, it made me laugh again and of course there is a pin design of that scene too. This is Tilla's first real merch. Good for her. Of course they made merch for the one off. Someone is out there emptying their bank account to have a "complete collection" because they just love dropping merch back-to-back.

Lazy ass shit right here. Who in their damn mind would buy this? Better than that slurs shirt though. I have to talk about the Helluva merch, but they are doing recolors now. What is this a fighting game?

Back on topic, this episode actually kept my attention unlike Full Moon and Apology Tour. Watching those episodes made me want to start drinking. Just alright episode, one of the better ones for a season that was about to rot. I am starting to like Millie more; it is nice to see her talk to a character that is not Mooxie.

[cator99]

please finish your wedding story, i so badly want to hear the rest of it. i await eagerly.

>everyone lived happily ever after

>a few weeks pass

>I write the brides a lengthy and detailed letter of recommendation to their immigration lawyer

>they're overjoyed and think its a beautiful letter, and I'm glad to help because I hope they last forever and get everything they want in life, if I may drop the act and be sincere for a moment

>a few days pass. the bride I've known for over 15 years messages me

>however... she doesn't care. she's on her honeymoon. and I'm just some chick she was friends with as a kid. what does upset her is how she found out.

>at first I assume that the woman who reached out to her (who I knew back in jr high, and is a few years older than me) was just trying to upset her

>bride tells me about how this woman was her best friend and then suddenly blocked her out of nowhere, which was (and is) still very painful for her

>the woman, who we will refer to as "A" whips up a story about being concerned for the bride's safety and privacy or something

>bride is confused. there's no identifying information. the post is a nothingburger to her. what's important here is that she's upset that this woman messaged her after 4 years, not to make things right..... but to talk about "zander"

>right, this is about me, because this is "A" we're talking about here...... hell hath no fury like a closet case scorned

how did she find my blog?

I assume it went like this:

>"A" goes to peek at her ex-bestie's wedding photos

>"Zander" Spotted

>runs to LC

>"hey does anyone remember Zander who I used to post about on here all the time 7 years ago? I may have found an update!"

>"that's terf cator99 who was posted about on the Women Youre Ashamed To Want To Fuck thread you fucking idiot that looks nothing like her"

>no here's proof!

>autism ensues

>several replies get deleted, other responses indicate they're "A" sperging and linking my blog

>people argue if I deserve to be there anymore

>"she's a tif"

>"no"

> yes"

>"no"

>"I used to know her" ["A" posting]

>"tell us more!"

>"she used to have this one pair of glasses and then she had this other pair of glasses that looked really good on her..."

meanwhile:

>assume she's probably back on her LC shit

>find and link bride to the LC thread and explain to her that "A" has just been trolling for fun and to pay it no mind, you're better off without her in your life

>"hey bride-chan, not to be weird but I'm just trying to understand this shit, do you think A ever had a thing for me... I always kind of assumed she was bi or gay when we were younger and thought it was cool that she was androgynous and went to school dressed as Kaito from vocaloid all the time so I wanted to be her friend but she was pretty rude to people and I backed off"

>"well i dont know but she's married to a man now..."

>yet here she is trying to get under the skin of two women who are with other women

to be fair I earned the lolcow title fair and square years ago all on my own, and really do feel I owe "A" a favor for introducing me to the site. it was very formative for me to find out places like that existed right at the moment I was starting to have conflicting thoughts about the trans shit so I could gain some self-awareness (and general awareness overall) (shout out to "A"s friend who cowtipped to me.....)

meanwhile, on LC:

>"well done ladies, we've figured it all out. Butch Lesbian cator99 is currently partying with gay men, and It is common knowledge that "gay men" are all secretly bisexuals who are looking to hook up with women who say things like "I'm a lesbian" and "I am not attracted to males". That is their mating call, in fact. These words activate the Hetero gland in the Amygdala like a sleeper agent who has been biologically programmed– as we all are– to stop the kiki-ing and split off into heterosexual pairings at the end of a poppers-fuelled night assless-twerking to Britney."

>"good work. But I'll one-up you: look at this screenshot."

[photo from an instagram account, featuring a photo of 17 year old Zander's legs in the bath. "I Am Totally Into Epic Awesome Penis Now!!!!!!" (She had never seen a penis)]

>"yes, this is definitely a normal thing for a straight woman to say. I always knew she was a faker."

>"yes. as im sure you're all aware, there are many social and career benefits from pretending to be a lesbian."

>"doesn't that idiot know that she can't just lie and change her orientation? I can't believe she's been straight this whole time."

>"what does she have to gain from lying?"

>"She's so adamant about being a lesbian, which is a dead giveaway for a cover-up operation. The more they resist, the more evident it is that they are lying in order to gain access to that highly lauded Online Lesbian Following, which is something every straight woman wants deep down."

meanwhile:

>call gf

>"bad news. I just found out I'm actually straight."

[apopcornkernel]

dick and jason have so many cool parallels especially if jason is a villain it actually makes their relationship more interesting and meaningful. the concept of brothers in blood is so great!!! please tell what you wish was different about this story!!!

hi anon!! thank you for sending me the ask like i begged in that post shfdjshkf

compulsory disclaimer: i like working within the confines of the text, when they aren’t rooted in misconceptions of the characters in the first place. i think pre-flashpoint pre-morrison jason deserves the same treatment and so does dick's view of jason considering all the other extenuating circumstances

ANYWAYS, my main issue with brothers in blood is that jason doesn't seem to have a plan like at ALL. he just shows up and starts killing people...? i i believe that dick's jason event was not fully capitalized on and that jason's character suffers for it. like he never really comes off as a fully threatening rogue, dangerous and cunning in his own right; his main schtick is "needless" violence and that's really it 😭

unlike with bruce and mia, for bruce jason literally engineered a drug coup, he ran circles around batman and taunted him with hints and clues slowly until the revelation of his return (after which bruce goes on a hunt for evidence himself to see if it's true). jason then maneuvered him into an impossible situation where he had to choose between letting jason kill the joker or killing jason to stop him from doing it, wherein jason not only bared his soul and anger and hurt but also pushed bruce to do the same. and when pushed to make the final decision, bruce is panicking. he's shaking, he can't think straight. and when he hits falsely he's completely distraught and i know that it haunts him.

and i think that's the type of psychological anguish jason should always be inflicting onto his opponents!!!! after mia's encounter with jason, she was like this:

and that's after jason dug up her entire history and taunted her about it. and then he blew up her high school.

and guess what happened right before OYL, right before brothers in blood... yeah. devin grayson's trauma speedrun arc which culminated in the entire city of bludhaven being leveled by chemo

i honestly think that jason Would go there. and i think it would've made for a more intense fight, coupled with the resentment dick already displays in the comic! and i think it's a damn shame that brothers in blood flopped in execution when there was a lot of potential in its concept and setup :/

that's also why i don't like teen titans #29. jason comes off as just another jealous guy taking out his daddy issues on a teenager with no thought or regard for anything else but violence. his only semblance of a plan is in incapacitating the titans, and after that he doesn't really think anymore? jason's also unable to get a reaction from tim, like i said. jason is screaming out his feelings and going U REALLY THINK U COULD REPLACE ME???? meanwhile tim is just like: "mm yeah im better than you idgaf". it's really unsatisfying. i expected better from jason and in fact i do not think that he would be emotionally unstable enough to be this careless with tim. his biggest turmoil lies with bruce and even with BRUCE he's cunning. so,,, yeah

[itsbansheebitch]

OH MY GOD

yall... i just stood up to my dad.

I wont get into all the shit he has going on & what hes done, but hes what the public call "a crazy mfer" or perhaps "a jackass."

I just tested positive for Covid. My sister has Covid for the second time. She got it from going to a cousin's wedding.

That side of my family is known for BELIEVING in Covid, but calling the China virus (the crazy mfer side of the family, really :/)

Dad then invited himself and his sister (my aunt) to my GRANDMA'S (mom's mom) FUNERAL X_X

Theyre also homophobic (obvi) and my queer ass is like 0_0

Not to mention bro is misogynistic as hell. Bro literally believes that women can not be as strong as men. Disregards all papers that prove otherwise. This man is a SCIENCE PROFESSOR.

I decided to unblock him and rip him apart. I will repeat the text so that we can all clown on him together (written exactly as the text with names & locations redacted):

------------------------

[Sister] brought covid home from the wedding. i tested positive. we are both immunocompromised. the asthma was diagnosed last year or so. thanks for insulting my weight and putting both me and [sister's] lives at risk (sarcasm:D). me and [sister] will not be coming to any more family functions until you care about our health. you know, the bare minimum for a parent?

you will also not come to [town next to us where i went to high school], [city near us where we do shopping & such], or [city where our college campus is] until you get your shit together. if you do, we will have problems :). if i hear you EVER disrespecting my future step sisters, you are going to see what its like for me to take a big sister role :). im tired of yalls excuses. NO ONE deserves the treatment you have given me. i wish you well. as long as you stay far away from me.

------------------------

This is the most push back he's ever received in his life for his behavior. I'm sick and can't think straight. I'm going to make the best of it lmaoooooo

If yall think this is soft on him, consider that if he decides to not respect my boundaries, i will be getting a restraining order, a gun, and if he shows up irl (espec without warning) i will take more extreme measures.

I don't live in the same state as him anymore.

You learn you deserve/deserved better when you look at kids around you and realize that if the same thing happen to them, you'd beat the living shit out of the parents.

NO ONE deserves abuse. NO ONE deserves neglect.

I wish everyone healing in this trying time.

And my covid is already getting better. I think I just got past Day 3. College starts soon and after I recover I'm going to wear a mask just in case X_X

For anyone who has faced abuse or neglect I would recommend (for feeling seen):

OPAL (Animation on YouTube by Jack Stauber)

Not Like Us by Kendrick Lamar

[alien-hybreed]

The Abduction

Abigail's night is ruined. She thought tonight might finally be the night. She'd lined up a cute date at a Halloween party only to have her crush ditch her for another woman. Now she's walking home alone.

High above, it watches. The last of it’s kind. Cold. Alone. In her, it sees a kindred spirit, a future for its kind. Once it brings her on board the mothership, neither of them will be truly alone ever again...

The cold night air felt like it was biting into Abigail's exposed arms and legs as she solemnly strode along the dimly lit path. She sniffled, brushing her auburn hair away from her face as tears continued to stream down her face. She supposed this was how god might be punishing her for the indecency she'd been tempted into.

She hadn't expected Luke to take her up on the offer of being her date to the Halloween party, so she'd tried extra hard to look good for him. Too hard it had seemed. Was the sexy catholic school girl costume really such an affront to her beliefs that she'd deserved to be not only ignored, but ultimately ditched in favor of some busty, blonde, little bimbo? Ultimately the date had been a total disaster.

Abigail didn’t care how many people had stared when she cried at the sight of Luke and the other woman drunkenly making out in the booth. She'd high-tailed it straight out of there without even stopping to collect her coat. Admittedly, she did regret leaving that behind.

Grief-stricken, she had no idea where to go or what to do. She'd never felt so alone. She didn't want to go home but the thought of being around people made her uncomfortable and it was too late to seek refuge at her church. Though she'd have been too ashamed to go, were that even an option. Pausing to look up at the night sky, she mumbled a desperate plea;

“oh dear god, take away from here. Just let me start over. Let me be better.”

As if in reply to her prayer, she could smell a faint odour on the air, acrid and burnt like an overheating electronic device. The air around her seemed to shimmer like a heat haze before a flash of blinding white light forced her eyes shut. Abigail felt like in that instant she was on the sharpest drop of a rollercoaster. Weightless, her stomach catching in her mouth. And just like that, Abigail was there one moment, gone the next.

* * *

Abigail came to with a start, sprawled on a plain, gunmetal surface. Everything around her was pitch black. She hadn't partaken alcohol, had someone roofied her punch? Shivering, she picked herself up as a thick rivulet of clear slime dripped on her from overhead.

“ew, ew, ew!” she squeaked, frantically swiping at the trickle of slime as it ran down her neck and under her collar. It was freezing cold, thick and gunky as it slid down her back. A couple more droplets of the same fluid pattered down around her, but she couldn’t see anything but blackness when she looked up.

She thought that was odd, the floor was too smooth, too flawless for this to be a cave of any sort. Which means someone had to have made it…

“hello!? If this is someone's idea of a joke, congratulations, I'm real scared” she shouted to no avail. Nothing, not even an echo

“this isn't funny anymore, just let me out” still nothing. Her legs knocked together as she shivered. Unsurprisingly, her knee high socks and ridiculously short, tartan mini skirt did very little to keep her warm. Serves me right for not dressing up as a sexy cop or lumberjack, literally anything with pants would have been better, she thought. Also nowhere near as blasphemous. Luke was good looking but Abigail was really kicking herself for trying so hard to pander to his silly preferences.

“I just don't wanna be alone…” she murmured to herself. Much to her shock, something seemed to reply, like her own words being played backwards and slowed down.

“…who-who…. Who's there!?” the same sound as before, repeating itself was her only reply. Nervously Abigail began backing up. She shrieked as another strand of slime dripped down on her, soaking into her sleeve and bringing her arm out in goosebumps.

“this isn't funny, seriously just…” her voice trailed off as a low rumble above made her look up. The equivalent of a full drinking glass of slime dropped on her face with a sickening plop. She tried to shriek again but the slime was so thick she had to tear it away from her mouth just to breath.

She gasped for air as she desperately tried to wipe the rest of the strange liquid from her face. Just a little of it had touched her lip, it was surprisingly not unpleasant which was more than she could say for the rest of this experience.

“this is so messed up, please someone? Anyone!” she cried, choking back tears as her fear continued to grow. Abigail could hear something large and wet shifting in the darkness. As it did, a few more droplets of slime dropped on and around her. Abigail whimpered as she clawed at her hair, now wet and matted, desperately trying to clear the gunk from it.

So distracted by the gunk, she didn’t notice a thin, purple tendril snaking it's way towards her from out of the dark until she felt the sticky, soft, warmth of it's flesh on her leg as it coiled around her leg.

“Christ!” She screamed, stumbling backwards, hyperventilating as she shook her leg to try and shake the thing free. Feeling the hard surface of a wall behind her, Abigail panicked as she realized she was now stuck between a hard place and whatever this was.

The tendril was slithering up her thigh, tugging at her as it did so. She shrieked and screamed as she swatted at the appendage, trying to prise it off her or slow it somehow. Everywhere her skin was touched by it's slime now felt cold and tingled with the most peculiar numbing sensation. Only when the tentacle had enough of her leg in it's grip to anchor her in place did it finally stop, the tip hovering ominously an inch away from her miniskirt.

“oh no, oh nononono this can't be happening…” she blurted as she frantically looked around for any way out or a tool she could use to fend off the thing. Instead the wall seemed to just curve away into the darkness on either side. That would make this some sort of circle or chamber… or pit… was this hell? Surely not. Despite her desperation to date Luke, she hadn’t done anything? Thought about it and chastised herself maybe but nothing to warrant being damned to hell surely.

That’s when she noticed a surprising sensation in her trapped leg. The tentacle seemed to be massaging it. Her breath caught in her throat as she looked down to see it expertly working her calf muscles.

“that’s… oh that's… good?” she stammered, laughing a little hysterically at how absurd this was. A thin trickle of slime dripped on her shoulder and into her collar but she paid it no heed, as she was so focused on the motion of the tentacle on her leg. It's warmth was somewhat welcome given how painfully cold she'd been.

“You're uh… not so bad… right?” she murmured, slowly moving her hand towards it. Indifferent to the hand hovering over it, the tentacle kept constricting and releasing. Slowly, Abigail rested her hand on it and gently gripped it's tip. It almost tickled as it squirmed in the palm of her hand, smearing sticky strands of slime all over it. But it was so warm and the bones in her fingers had been so cold…

Abigail breathed deeply a few times and began to relax. This was beyond weird but at least she seemed safe or in no immediate danger. Briefly releasing her hold on the tentacle, she held her hand up close to her face to get a look at the white, translucent goop. As she looked closely at it dripping from her hand, she couldn't stop thinking about how it tasted before. How pleasant it was as it tingled on the edge of her lip. Slowly leaning closer, she carefully licked at the tip of her forefinger. How strange, it was salty and sweet at the same time, it's texture thick and rich, yet it dissolved in her mouth like it was nothing.

She stared at her hand for a moment, wrestling with the urge to lick it clean when she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. Three more tentacles hovering in the dark, like snakes ready to strike.

“um… hi?” she offered weakly, nerves and an escalating sense of dread creeping back into her mind. At no point did the tentacle on her leg stop massaging and that was proving to be quite a distraction. Abigail didn't even notice she'd put her hand back on it.

“well this, sure has been a thing” she stammered, trying not to smile at how good her leg was feeling. The tendrils snaked their way through the air towards her as the wet shifting sound came again, sounding closer this time.

“but y'know I really ought to be on my way now…” her voice trailed off as the tendrils drew close enough to touch her and dozens more seemed to be writhing in the dark. One of the three foremost tentacles began snaking it's way around Abigail's other leg, the sudden rush of cold numbness followed by the sticky warmth made her exhale sharply.

“ok um, please, I really should…” she began to stammer as the other two tendrils moved for her miniskirt

“whoa no that… that is not happening” she stuttered, blushing as she fought to hold her miniskirt down with her hands, unintentionally smearing the slime on her hand across her inner thigh. As a couple more tentacles snaked through the air towards her, Abigail’s lips quivered from both fear and impulsive need to taste the slime again. The tendrils seemed to be aware of this, moving closer and closer towards her face, almost as if to tease her. Abigail turned her head away and closed her eyes, silently praying for the tentacles to leave her be. To cease this... temptation.

She shuddered as she felt a large glob of slime land squarely on her collarbone and dribble down the curvature of her breasts into her cleavage. Her body was numb and tingling all over, save for where the warm tentacles massaged her legs. She could feel her knees beginning to buckle as she replayed the memory of tasting the slime on her finger over and over.

Anxiously, she bit at her lip as she felt a tentacle brushing against her cheek while another lightly stroked at her neck. The sound of something enormous drawing close with a series of wet smacking, plopping sounds forced Abigail to open her eyes. The sound had made her think of an enormous bag of sausages spilling open and much to her horror, it didn't look that far from it.

Dozens, hundreds of bright purple tentacles of varying sizes were unfurling, like a horde of snakes dispersing. Nestled at the heart of the mass was some sort of body or head tentacle that they all seemed to join to. Slowly, the tentacle peeled open like a banana, revealing a bright green interior full of smaller green tentacles that writhed from it's center.

Amongst them was a particularly bulbous purple tentacle that seemed to have eight amber eyes, four in a diamond pattern on either side of it. Abigail screamed as loud as she could, the tentacles filling the air around her. The bulbous purple tentacle lashing across her like a giant tongue licking at her. Thick ropes of slime cascaded over and around her as Abigail’s scream became a silent shriek. Her breath seemed to catch in her throat as purple tendrils stroked at her face and chest. More snaked their way around her legs, eagerly hovering below her miniskirt.

Slowly, she began to gasp shallow breaths, her pupils dilating to tiny pinpricks as the slime saturated her clothing and was rapidly absorbed into her skin. The powerful aphrodisiac and stimulants in the slime had been gradually influencing her earlier, but now her nervous system was all but bursting with the sudden sensory overload.

The addictive quality of the slime had an almost immediate effect as the young woman took her hands from her miniskirt and began clawing at her blouse, yearning to feel the creature's slime against as much of her bare skin as possible. The buttons on her blouse either slid free or popped off in her frenzy, Abigail had no concept of patience or care in that moment. She wasn't alone and she craved intimacy.

She giggled playfully as the large purple tentacle slid up her belly, between the exquisite cleavage formed by her black lace bra and against her cheek. As it snaked past her face, she eagerly licked at it's flanks, taking in mouthfuls of the arousing slime. She liked feeling like this, she wanted more.

She felt the giant tentacle pull away while the tendrils at her waist tore her miniskirt from her, plucking off her black g-string with a snap. Abigail ripped at her bra until the straps and fasteners gave way. She flung it aside before pressing herself against the wall, throwing her head back and arching her spine to present her breasts to the creature.

“can't be alone. Don't leave me, don’t stop” she slurred. As if on cue, the bulbous tentacle spewed forth a torrent of slime, splattering across Abigail's chest and oozing over her toned stomach and down her legs. Gasping and gleefully chuckling, she leaned forward to let the slime drench her face and pour into her mouth before leaning back to gulp at the delicious juices.

Drenched head to toe in a thick layer of the white slime, Abigail began running her hands up and down her body, kneading and pulling at her tits, occasionally stopping to caress and squeeze the tentacles that writhed over and around her. Slowly, the tentacle nearest her vagina opened like a flower, allowing a smaller, green, incredibly phallic tentacle to emerge and begin grinding against her slit.

Abigail's legs finally buckled, as she slumped onto the tentacle. She virtually impaled herself on it as it punched deep into her vagina. As she did, tentacles coiled around her arms to hold het up. Another set of tentacles coiled around her tits, massaging them with the same expertise as the earlier motions on her legs.

Abigail groaned unintelligibly as her head lolled from side to side. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head when another phallic tentacle slithered through her anus while a trio of tentacles ending in bright green suckers clamped over her nipples and clit. Driven by pure instinct, she rolled her hips back and forth, working the tentacles in her pussy and ass to and fro, creating a wondrous sensation.

This must be heaven, thought her intoxicated brain. Nothing else could be so sublime or euphoric. Hungrily, her jaw hung agape, trying to mouth wordlessly 'please' over and over. As if in response to her plea, the giant purple tentacle split open and engulfed her face.

Abigail moaned with delight as she felt something slither into her mouth and begin to pump more of the delicious slime. She gurgled and slurped as more and more of the liquid flowed into her body, permeating every fibre of her being. She shuddered as her body was wracked by it's first ever orgasm.

But at no point did the tentacles even so much as pause or slow their pace. Utterly relentless in their work, they kept massaging, sucking and fucking every inch of her. Abigail groaned repeatedly as her body relaxed into their grip, the tentacles in her mouth, pussy and ass growing thicker, pushing deeper, endlessly pumping slime into her. She writhed and tried to squeal as another orgasm rocked her body from head to toe.

Yet, the tentacles kept going. Abigail didn’t care how much of her own drool dripped from her mouth or the copious amounts of slime and vaginal discharge that rained down from her pussy as a third orgasm blew her mind and made her toes curl.

Intoxicated and overstimulated beyond being able to think or move, she didn't notice the creature drag her into the centre of the room. Nor did she notice how her body hung limp in it's grasp as it propped her up in it's center, occasionally jerking and twitching as another orgasm rolled through her. All that mattered was the next rush of erotic bliss, all other sensations might as well not exist.

Abigail barely even felt the green tentacles swarming around her, gripping her tightly as the creature's main body seemed to be folding shut around her. Eventually the purple tentacles wrapped around it's body and grew tighter and tighter. Abigail didn't care, encased in slime and silky flesh that clung to her tentacle-wrapped figure, the only thing she felt was the approach and arrival of the next orgasm.

Outside, the slime encasing each tentacle hardened, turning the creature into a giant cocoon for Abigail.

* * *

She dreamed of bright lights and other worlds. She dreamed of others, other tentacle beasts, roaming the cosmos, alone in their vessels. One by one, she felt their light darken and disappear until it was just her. Cold. Alone. Drifting. Except that wasn't her, Abigail knew this wasn’t her but it all felt so real.

Periodically she stirred from her surreal dreams to find herself floating in darkness, the sensation of warm flesh enveloping her completely. An orgasm would begin to build in her loins as the tentacles in her pulsed in time with her own heartbeat. She struggled to no avail as her arousal peaked, the tentacles pumping more slime into her that nudged her back into unconscious bliss.

As she slumbered, she would dream of strange languages, biology beyond human understanding. More and more frequently, she dreamed of herself as the tentacle creature. Sometimes she dreamed she was searching for a body she could adapt to become her vessel on the little blue world below. She was so alone, she needed to not be alone.

As she dreamed, her tentacles tightened around her, hugging her body as firmly as she could. She dreamed she was the human chosen for it's compatibility and then she would dream she was herself again, inspecting the human's form as she prepared to merge with it.

Again she would awake, her body aching as it grew accustomed to having bones. Her muscles ached as they stretched and grew. Her skin felt sore where her old form had fused to it's human body. Again, when it became too much, her consciousness would slip away and allow her to sleep off her growing pains…

* * *

The cocoon began to crack open, thick rivulets of white slime oozing from the breach in it's side. Several tentacle tips pushed at the crack, splitting it open and widening it until the body of a young woman slid free amidst a gush of slime.

Her purple flesh glistened in the low light as the slime slowly slid from her. Her head was crowned with a mass of tentacles in place of her hair, with dozens of larger, thicker tentacles extending from her shoulders. Slowly the tentacles began to twitch then wriggle, slithering back and forth like a nest of snakes. Her slender arms and legs slowly pulled her upright, her eight amber eyes darting around the control room of her spaceship.

Incredible, she thought. It felt so bizarre, yet so familiar to have arms and legs but equally so to have tentacles so suddenly.

She was neither Abigail or the pilot. She was now both. Both minds and bodies, merged flawlessly into a singular entity with the memories and personality of both. It was like everything until now had been a dream and only now was she truly awake for the first time.

She reached out with a tentacle and spoke the operation command. Sensing her DNA and the authority that came with it, the ship beeped in response. Immediately, three dimensional lights appeared in the air before her. Graphs and images showing a microscopic view of her cell structure told her the merging was successful beyond her initial hopes. Her new body was extraordinarily fertile and ready to begin repopulating her species.

Smiling wryly as she reviewed an assessment of viable human contributors. She remembered enough of Abigail's past life to see the irony in this. Chuckling to herself, she primed the teleporter and prepared to reacquaint herself with a very specific male…

* * *

She could hear the male and female grunting and moaning in the bedroom next to the kitchen the moment she appeared in a bright flash of light. Luke and his mate.

How oddly fortunate that his DNA would be an optimal match with her own. Abigail would have been mortified by what she was about to interrupt and what she would do to them. But she wasn't Abigail anymore. Her body was already secreting it's slimy coating as the thrill of seizing Luke and using him stirred her arousal.

Her tentacles twitched with excitement as she flung the bedroom door open. They were both naked, the other woman was riding Luke in a reverse cowgirl position while he gripped her ass and stared at the way his cock plunged in and out of her sopping wet pussy.

Before either of them could react, their intruder's tentacles lashed out, wrapping around both of the hapless humans. Abigail ripped the woman free, wrapping tentacles around her arms and legs to hold her at the edge of the bed.

“wait your turnnn” she hissed at her before stuffing a tentacle into the woman's mouth while smearing a handful of slime across Luke's face. Clambering atop him in a reverse cowgirl position of her own. Luke's eyes rolled as the slime immediately took a hold of him.

Now that she was part human, Abigail's slime was refined, perfectly adapted to work on humans. Her tentacles slithered around Luke's cock and steered it into her eagerly awaiting pussy. Abigail hissed and slithered her tentacles all up and over his body as she gyrated her hips against his, he bucked up to meet her and match her pace. His body was limp save for his waist and cock which possessed an unnatural vigor thanks to Abigail's slime.

“See, bitch. He's mine” groaned Abigail, her eyes boring into the other woman's. She squealed and kicked, making Abigail chuckle. Abigail squeezed her own tits and caressed her stomach and thighs with her hands as if to mock the woman's earlier movements.

“how's that huh? How do you like it now huh?” she hissed, relishing the woman's outrage as she struggled against her tentacle bindings.

“oh no, that's rhetorical, dear. You'll enjoy this, just like him” teased Abigail as the tentacle she'd stuffed in the woman's mouth began dribbling slime into her mouth. Abigail chuckled as her competitor slackened before eventually to sucking at the tentacle.

Beneath her, Luke's cock and balls had started to swell and take on a purplish tinge as the slime altered his reproductive organs to suit Abigail's needs. Abigail gasped as she felt the warm splash of Luke's cum surging into her womb.

For a solid minute, Luke kept cumming, pumping copious amounts of seed into her. Abigail pulled the woman close, panting as she felt her body taking Luke's seed and processing it. Instinct was guiding her as she felt a tentacle extend from between her shoulders and wriggle into the woman's pussy.

The blonde gagged on the tentacle in her mouth as she tried to cry out. Abigail slid her tentacles free and embraced the woman. Her tentacle sliding back and forth in the woman's throbbing pussy. The woman hugged her tightly, stroking Abigail's tits and ass as she continued to milk Luke's cock.

“now it's your turn” chuckled Abigail as her tentacle began pumping slime into the woman's womb. She cried out, hugging Abigail tightly as thick bulges worked through the tentacle and into her. Each bulge was a rapidly gestating egg, created by Luke's altered seed, fertilizing the hundreds of mutated ovum produced in Abigail's womb.

The blonde looked at Abigail with a vacant, giddy expression, her mind utterly crushed by Abigail's secretions and actions.

“that's what you get for not having any protection” giggled Abigail as she withdrew her ovipositor tentacle from the woman and stood up. Luke's cock slid free of her with a wet flop.

Standing on the bed over him, Abigail pulled him up with her tentacles and held him close to her while she watched the woman's body rapidly swelling with the dozens of hybrid offspring gestating within. Satisfied with her work, Abigail signaled the mothership to teleport the three of them back aboard.

Now, that she knew the breeding process worked, she intended to make plenty of use of Luke's manhood. Given the how unlikely it was that she could re-use the woman as a surrogate for her young, Abigail was already shortlisting candidates for her next batches.

Yes, there were no shortage of women she'd relish inflicting that upon. She would teach them all a lesson. The bright light flashed and Luke, his fling and Abigail vanished into the night...

[namtanlovesfilm]

gmmtv 2024 part 2 trailers first impression & ranking :)

from most excited for to least excited:

us: I SCREAMED!!! of course gl ranks number one, let's bffr, but legit this looks so indie & good I love it! sing is gonna be so good at being the abandoned lover hahaha, and the girls have so much chemistry & are so cute!!! I ship it already <3

breakup service: I did NOT expect to get an off as MAIN in a straight romcom again after 4 fucking years, I'm beyond elated!!! the fact that he's paired with a very popular singer also makes me happy! the plot looks really fun & reminds me of catch me baby and midnight motel so I'm all in!!! my man deserves this sm <3

hide & sis: gawin in a role like this??? ATE DOWN!!! but honestly the whole cast is perfect, I can't believe we're gonna get pepper & lookjun playing an on-screen couple! I hope this one is more like ps: I hate you & nothing like the jungle but I'm super excited I love everyone here :)

the ex morning: bruh if you'd have told a kristsingto show would be 4th on this list I would've laughed in your face but... tell me why this plot seems so fucking cute?? I feel like we haven't gotten this type of second chance bl before, and idk if it's nostalgia or what but I'm actually really into it lol

thame po: yooooo this morning I could not picture estwilliam together, but actually I like them a lot already! as a lykn fan I'm happy to see them in a series, and the plot is quite original which is becoming more & more rare so I'm excited!

sweet tooth, good dentist: I still don't know how to fully feel about mark & ohm t, I feel like they look way too similar, but oh well. this looks very sweet (like its title) & y'all know I love dumb romcoms like these so I'll be watching!

leap day: this looks insane & the cast feels random af but it seems interesting! I hope it doesn't end up being one of those shows who thought throwing gun & his insane talent in a show would be enough to cover its bad writing *cough* home school *cough* midnight museum *cough* excited to see pond in an interesting role for once though lmao

the dark dice: this looks like the thai high school squid game to me, it seems interesting & I love that aungpao is in here, but I'll have to see how I feel once the show starts airing to see if I'll watch it or not.

scarlet heart thailand: this teaser told me nothing so I googled the original, ngl it's a slay for tu she looks so pretty, and I do love historical shows so I'll probably be watching! also very happy to see tay, force & phuwin here :)

friendshit forever: I legit thought I was gonna get a mookpat gl bruh lmaoooooo, but nope instead I get girls fighting over a dude ;_; like I get it new is hot af but bruh in 2024 we still have girls having cat fights... I'm good :/ the title is hilarious though :')

ossan's love thailand: this trailer actually made me happy bc contrarily to my initial thought I think earth is ADORABLE as haruta! and the actor they chose to play the ossan??? DAMNNN DADDY 😏 probably still won't be watching since I hate remakes but this looks better than I anticipated!

the heart killers: call me a hater but I did not feel this at all, I feel like it's a more boring mix of not me, only friends & midnight motel and I don't particularly care for either ships so I will not be watching... I'm sure this show will be fine without me though lol

perfect 10 liners: we are but even more boring, they even pulled up aouboom & marcpoon LMAOOO. again all love but I don't care for this at all, it's so basic I can't do this to myself anymore, I'm sorry it's called self-care at this point :')

revamp the undead story: again I don't care for bounprem & THE gmmtv vampire show is my golden blood for me babe, like sorry but jossgawin forever 🫶 (more seriously this doesn't look bad but I simply do not give any fuck to watch this show)

[beacarrot]

made in 2007.

I wrote a piece, almost a critique,

In tribute to myself,

Since no one ever did it before,

The homage I was never ready to tell,

And this time, I don't regret anymore,

Neither sleepless nights,

Nor mornings I was high,

Promises made in heated thrill,

But never fulfilled,

So, I chose to act my age today,

I drove with my hand near my heart, on display,

Less fragile, weak, reckless for say about love like before,

And face all the truth I ignored.

Since my debut days, I’ve been out of my own sight,

The world was shocked,

When I began to bleed as I fight,

God has His way to show me it worked out right,

Still, there was a look in my eye as I prayed,

For life to be kind, for dreams to stay.

I was just a child chasing prophecy's thread,

Not sure if it ever truly led,

I never knew I could feel that much...

But I was made in 2007 as such.

I don’t know how long I’ll last,

Which morning I’ll wake and regret the past,

Every demon I fed, that brought me down fast,

With greed,

With precision, with fury, a seed

Of reasons without remorse,

No sense of the "moment," just driving off course,

Fueled by feelings, tribal and wild,

A sinking boat I swore was my Titanic, oh, shit, I was beguiled,

Powers I gave my ghosts so freely,

Only to lose my mind, pointing blame for everyone who was around me vaguely,

My hopes never the same,

Will death wait for my last cigarette's flame?

Will it show how my vices claim their price,

Expensive, not nice?

Will she have mercy?

Heal wounds untended,

Unloved love, time poorly expended,

Fixing a life that was unlived?

I don’t know how long I’ll live,

When I won’t wake, and they’ll forgive,

Every slip I made,

What prayers will be on my grave displayed?

A nameless soul, forgotten and slight,

Someone they wonder if was ever in sight,

A legend lost in a blink,

Born in 2007, but now on the brink.

Sometimes it feels like you're always misplaced,

And only they fit, like a perfect embrace,

But not you,

As if those you love make you unworthy and less whole,

But rainbow sparks still ignite your soul,

I hope you never forget your worth,

Even if your body feels wrong from birth,

And you cut yourself within so no one sees,

But you deserve a perfect life, with ever rigth,

You're bold,

And that’s something I behold,

Unique,

Deserving of the world’s glow,

Though the world might not deserves you back that well,

I hope you still hold onto the dream,

For a better world, a brighter gleam,

Taking risks could be the perfect door, the key,

The right words live inside you and me,

One day they'll watch in awe,

Mouths open, struck by what they'll see,

I'll know my bets were right,

Because me and maybe someone were made to fight,

Made in 2007, since there we stood bright.

I wished to freeze a decade in time,

Cherish my mother's hug, warm and prime,

Honor the personality that defines me,

Wish cancer never claimed so many,

That my theories on favorite songs were true,

That high school never bid adieu.

I wish I still believed in pretty lies,

That on some corner my favorite singer would rise,

And plant me a kiss under the skies,

I wish I remembered silly talks,

I wish my parents could knew "forever",

That friends never left town, or crossed seas,

That youth was an eternal diamond breeze,

I wish my paintings were seen,

My stories told and kept pristine,

I wish MY story was shared wide,

That oceans would carry me to where my heart longs,

I wish for so many things that I can’t even know,

And every thought’s a wish that continues to grow,

But one thing is true,

I began with a spark in 2007, anew.

I spent too long thinking he was all gray,

But it was just smoke and mirrors in my the way,

I was the gray,

Like the cigarette, my silent friend,

Lethal and sharp, a means to no end,

I thought the world was cold,

Drained of its color, some old story untold,

But I had a golden side that would show,

Though rarely, it never failed to glow,

I feel something pulling me near,

And I can’t fight it, though unclear,

Time that I left behind in disdain,

Freedom carries me like rain,

This life is dear,

A virtue beyond compare,

Not an illusion,

The world around has already been corrupted,

Decayed,

It’s cold in summer, and lessons fade,

But no one learns from your mistakes,

Except you, with every risk you take,

The past is a time machine,

The present, a luxury unseen,

And I know…

When you're ready, bury your sorrow,

Everyone loves your life, but you,

This is the time to see your achievements too,

I want you to see them, as I now do,

This is your place, and our time to rise,

And I end this note with clear skies...

Remembering I was made in 2007.

(I was born in 2007, and in this track I think I make this clear, it's the fifth poem I post, and five really a special number for me. I think I wanted to express the most positive points of my experiences from my first years of life, and even the not so pleasant experiences at some point in life when we look back it seems less impactful than it was at the time. It's about me, you, victories, values, reflections, comings and goings, pride and complexities. Anyway, I feel this track as an importanet part in me.)

Signed: Beatriz Ranzonni.🩵

[bluesturniolo333]

hello friends,

this has nothing to do with the sturniolo’s, heartstopper, one direction, or any of the other fandoms that i am a part of. but i have written something. this is like a poem. a poem that i have written about someone who used to be so near and dear to my heart. a person i used to call a friend, but they do not deserve that privilege anymore. please enjoy and let me know what you think. i want to submit it to a writing contest. here’s “i hate you” :

_________________________________________________

i hate you.

i hate how you make every single thing about you. i hate how when i try to share a story or say that i am even proud of myself in the slightest, you somehow find a way to make it about yourself every time. i hate that i can never win when it comes to you. i hate that you’ve made everyone feel the same way as you. i hate that you make me look stupid to make yourself look better. i hate that you treat me like this.

i hate how when i look at you, i see every thing i hate about myself. i see my flat ass, i see my stretch marks, i see my too big boobs, i see my yellow teeth, i see my red hair, i hate that i see why all the guys i like choose you over me. i hate that you feel the need to point out my flaws. i hate that you poke fun at me when you think i’m not listening. i hate that you make me so insecure.

i hate that you always argue with me. i hate that it seems like i can never be right in your eyes. i hate that you never feel the need to take my side because you would rather get validation from men who only want you for your body than say how you actually feel and take the side of your lifelong friend. i hate that you don’t see how much you’re hurting me.

i hate that you crave attention so much that you have started to put down others in order to make yourself feel better. i hate that i can tell that you think none of the guys we know will ever like me because they all like you instead. i hate that i can tell that you think less of me because of my weight. i hate when you make fun of “fat” people in public. i hate that you use to live by “never judge a book by its cover” but now you need to take your own advice. i hate that you don’t realize how your words can affect the people around you.

i hate how it feels like you’re turning my friends against me. i hate that i feel so left out sometimes when you two talk because that’s how her and i use to be. i hate that i sound bitter. and i hate that i am. i hate that you said you would never be friends with her if the circumstances were different because she “isn’t your kind of person” yet it seems like she chooses you over me. i hate that you have made my best friend resent me.

i hate that i’m so jealous and envious of your hair, your eyes, your smile, your body. i hate myself and it’s all your fault. i hate that i hate the girl i see when i look in the mirror because of you. i hate that i hate the girl who i fought so hard to become throughout high school. i hate myself but more importantly,

i hate you.

———————————————————————————

end.

[agentravensong]

two scenes i would add to nerdy prudes must die

the thing about being autistic is that i will have no motivation to sit down and write stuff for my grad school applications all day, but then at night i'll find it in me to spend 3+ hours writing a tumblr post about my latest hyperfixation ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

this time that hyperfixation is nerdy prudes must die, a show that, despite still not being my favorite starkid hatchetfield musical, has really dug its claws into me. i'm gonna detail two scenes that i think would add to certain character arcs, give ritchie (and ruth)'s death(s) more impact, and really drive home the show's themes. don't think i need much more preamble than that, so, here we go!

1. Second Lauter family scene

A scene set between Ritchie's death and Ruth's, fitting best in the plot as is right after "Hatchet Town".

Primary purpose: Show more of Steph's character and her relationship with her father; show that the attitudes that made the teens' high school experience hell (pre-ghost!max) are reinforced by the adults

Basic outline: Steph and her dad are having a convo, prompted by the mayor, about how school is going; a kind of convo that, with how awkward it is, clearly doesn't happen often. Lauter says something half-hearted about how it's a shame her high school experience is being ruined by these events, because it was the happiest time of his life (as a contrast to the opinions our protags express in the opening number).

Steph doesn't want to talk about the murder stuff (duh) so she redirects to how her grades have genuinely improved (or at least did for a minute there) thanks to her studying with Pete, in a way that makes it clear she's genuinely proud of her improvement.

Mayor Lauter, in response, tells her that he doesn't want her hanging out with the nerds anymore, in or out of school, because it makes her a target (and also a suspect).

Steph gets upset at this dismissal; what kind of dad, she scoffs, would tell their daughter who was finally succeeding academically to stop trying? Especially when he was the one who told her to get her grades up?

And Mayor Lauter says something to the effect of, "You don't need to be a star student. I know you, Stephanie; that's never going to be you. All you need to be is good enough. Can you just do that for me?"

We have the mayor leave at this point; let's say he gets a phone call, cause that makes sense, and also is a deeply ironic reason for him to leave a family conversation considering his criticism of Steph's phone use. Steph could even point that out as a joke.

Here is where, if we have time, we give Steph a solo number. Well, it could be a solo, or it could be a duet with her dad — the kind where they're not singing to each other or aware that the other is singing, but they're basically singing their different perspectives on the same thing (in this case, their relationship). I propose the duet version because Corey deserves to get to show off his vocals more prominently in these shows.

Alternate ending if we're not doing the song: Steph can storm out, and the mayor can have an ominous line foreshadowing the drastic measures he'll be taking when we see him again.

The idea with this scene is that I want to give more weight to the whole "she's smarter than she thinks she is" angle to Steph's character. Show that she has found something through her bond with the nerds (Pete mainly) that makes her want to be more than just the "cool girl". And show that there is a part of her that wants a better relationship with her father (because if he won't believe in her, be proud of her, then who will?).

But also, we see how her dad has pigeonholed her into being that kind of airhead. All he cares about is that she stays out of trouble (which is to say, anything that would cause trouble for him). He doesn't care what she's genuinely interested in, what she aspires to; he's spent most of her teenage-hood assuming she's not interested in anything worthwhile, that she doesn't aspire to anything. He doesn't see her as a full person.

And, perhaps most importantly, him telling her not to associate with the nerds draws a direct line between him and our main antagonist, Max. Which matters for reasons that will become clearer as I discuss the second additional scene I came up with.

For the record, if I only got to add one of these scenes (NPMD is the longest of the Hatchetfield shows already, and both these scenes would have to be Act 2 additions), I'd pick this next one. So let's get to it.

2. High School Regression scene

Primary purpose: Showing how the murder(s) has/have affected the student body, and making the point that the hierarchies Max represented can't be disposed of that easily when he's still, literally and metaphorically, haunting the place.

This one would happen in between when the protags find out about Ritchie's death and when Grace informs Pete and Steph of Ruth's death. Practically, this means it would have to be set either:

A) right before Ruth goes to the BBQ Monologues rehearsal, with the scene centering around her, and leading directly into her arrival there (maybe replacing the cop convo entirely? maybe they're at the end of it)

or B) as basically a replacement for the Beanie's scene, but still leading into "If I Loved You" (and everything that comes after)

The beat-by-beat for this one is less solid in my head compared to the first scene, but the idea is that we see some of the cheerleaders and jocks going back to bullying Ruth in version A or Pete in version B (though in a less confident and malicious manner than Max did, as if their hearts aren't fully in it). Ruth or Pete gives some pushback and asks what changed to make them revert to this behavior.

I'm not sure how exactly the bullies express the "why", but in plain-speak, it's this: the students know about Ritchie (and Ruth)'s murder(s), and, maybe more importantly, the "nerdy prudes must die" that was written in Richie's blood. The message they've taken from that is that there is a killer reinforcing the social hierarchies they all abandoned when Max died. And so, with that latent threat hanging in the air, these students have decided to fall in line, in the hopes that they'll therefore be spared. Maybe, even, the murders will stop.

(you could also have one or two kids who are genuinely almost as cruel as max and are using this as an excuse to going back to being the assholes they were before, but you'd need more proper set-up for such a character i think)

Version A is pretty straightforward. I like the idea of Pete and/or Steph being there as well so it isn't just Ruth experiencing the misery (considering where things go from here)... but I know that they need to be dressed as different characters for when Ruth gets to the auditorium, so that probably isn't practical. Maybe there'd be time for Mariah to have made that quick change if Joey really stretched out his bit? But I know the change was tight even for Angela as is.

For version B, you could have the bullies find Steph and Pete at or on their way to Beanie's and be assholes to them there (because it makes sense to me that Steph and Pete would want to have their potentially incriminating conversation off high school grounds), but I think it has more thematic punch to set it in the high school.

Wherever it's set, in version B, Steph and Pete talk a bit about how the bullies' regression sucks, how things are even worse now than they were before Max died, which then leads into their conversation as it is in the actual show over whose fault this all is.

With Pete specifically, I think it'd be neat to call back to what he said to Steph way back in the show about his desire to blend in, to be invisible. That maybe, for a little bit, he liked being accepted, being important (to one person in particular), but it wasn't worth it. And with Steph, if we do have the second dad convo in this version of the show, we can maybe have her comment on how even her dad seems to believe in this bullshit social hierarchy, how they might never escape it.

I mentioned in my post detailing my initial nerdy prudes thoughts that I wished Pete and Steph had a convo that felt like Paul and Emma's convo right before "Join Us and Die". Basically, this is my attempt to give these teens that, without adding an entirely new scene just for that.

As a whole, this scene is my best attempt to Make Something of the themes and plot threads that are so well set up but get kind of lost in the last... third? of the show. Plenty of people have rightly posted that the adults are the real villains of this story. Max isn't scary just because he's one guy; he's representative of larger ideas, a larger system, perpetuated by those adults. Hierarchy, competition, and domination, treated as the natural, necessary state of the world. A system that reduces the personhood of all those ensnared in it.

Those ideas won't just disappear with his death. Max might have peaked in high school even if he lived because of the specific brand of boisterous asshole he was, but the world that instilled those ideas in him, the world beyond high school, will keep fostering and enforcing them, in its more mundane, subtle (comparatively) ways. It will keep producing more Maxs, and more Solomon Lauters.

Like, the whole "fuck clivesdale" bit is a running joke, and a funny one! But, also, I think there's something to be said about the fact that both the teens and adults are all in on this seemingly one-way rivalry, and how much focus is placed on it, in a show about *bullying*. A show about people who have arbitrary labels slapped on them as an excuse to be cruel to them.

"you're fucking losers, and we'll kill you!" isn't that far off as a sentiment from "nerdy prudes must die", is it?

and, like. their team name is the clivesdale chemists. chemists, like, nerds. it's supposed to be part of the joke, i'm pretty sure, that they're named after something nerdy, not a cool animal. if that parallel isn't intentional, then, i dunno man. it's still there either way.

(see also: the musical motif underneath the "who will pray for me" section of nerdy prudes must die also appearing as the chorus of "hatchet town". a motif that plays both when max asks ritchie who will remember him (who will remember *them*), right before enacting his ultimate "justice", and when the adults twist their memories into an excuse for a witch hunt, their own paranoid search for "justice".)

In real life, getting rid of the one asshole at the top of a rotten system doesn't fix the system. If the non-nerdy teens in this school were impressionable enough that one asshole could make them all act in line with his arbitrary beliefs, then his haunting presence (even if they don't know it's literally his ghost) should absolutely have *some* effect on them too.

And I think if you included a scene like this, it would make all that stuff in the script that's subtext, or half-developed, feel like it really was intentional, purposeful.

Does that all make sense? I hope so.

I know that actually trying to fit both of these into the show would require cutting some other stuff down for time, and it would complicate scene transitions and maybe fuck with the overall pacing. Really, this is more a thought experiment than anything else. I'm just glad to have it out of my head after it's been brewing there for multiple days, There's other stuff I'd change if I were to do a full edit of the script, sure, but these are the big things that really would've made the show click for me on the level tgwdlm does.

[cricket-reader]

hii!! love your writing its intoxicating!!! idk if you’ve seen the movie Easy A (if not DO IT!!! its on Netflix) but if you have i was thinking a fem (or gn if youre more comfortable with it) reader x bucky fic thats along that line where reader is like Olive and bucky is like Todd? maybe lots of angst/fluff/smut or whatever this prompt takes you. honestly anything as long as it has bucky comforting reader through whatever you choose? again if you havent seen then feel free to ignore this and thankya!!!

Easy A

Masterlist | A03 | Wattpad | Recommendations | Inbox | Taglist

Summary: after a truly awful date, you are comforted by Bucky. (High School AU)

Warnings: language, mentions of sex, non-con kissing (not Bucky), Brock Rumlow being a prick, fluff

Word Count: 3,470

A/N: Sorry it took so long. It took a while to find inspiration, but here it is! I hope this lives up to your expectations 💕💕

How could life get so messed up?

You find yourself asking this question a lot lately. It was a simple rumour. Something that you could should have stopped—no, prevented.

In fact, you could have prevented all of this. So in hindsight, this is all your fault.

That doesn’t mean, however, that you deserved this… right? Sure, some people probably definitely thought you did. What, being the campus whore? The virgin slut.

It was a simple white lie. But it grew into something so much bigger. Something you could never outlive. Rumours spread fast. Especially on a campus. Almost like the wildfires along the west coast.

Despite never having sex in your life or even having your first kiss, you were the sluttiest, dirtiest, whore out there.

Whilst all that isn’t true, you sure felt dirty. It seemed as though everyone believed the rumours. Sure, you had done nothing to dispute them. If anything, you only encouraged them. That was just you being stupid, you realise that now. Despite all of that, you wished that someone could look through the stupid lies. Because everyone had to be idiots to believe them.

Thinking back on it, this all could have been avoided. If you didn’t tell your former best friend that lie, none of this would have ever happened. It was the snowball effect, and it had grown out of proportion.

It only truly hit you in the face when Brock Rumlow tried to make a move on you.

You didn’t put it past him to believe that you were really a whore. He was quite daft. Regardless, when he asked you out, you had foolishly believed that he liked you for you; not for your fake self. He took you out to eat at the fairly nice seafood place in town and everything. You should have known that it wouldn’t end well.

It started off fine. You both made small talk and ordered drinks and food. Then you saw Bucky. He was the guy you had liked for a long time, not that anyone besides your old best friend knew that.

He was singing a cheesy happy birthday song with his colleagues. You giggled at the sight, not expecting such a serious guy to do something like that.

It all went downhill from there.

You panicked when you saw your former friend, Sharon Carter, sitting at a table across the room. You knew that Sharon has had her eyes on Brock Rumlow for a while—since first grade to be exact. It evaded your mind until you saw her. You knew then and there the mistake you had made.

Even if she was no longer your friend, you felt horrible. Sure, she hadn’t been too friendly to you after all the rumours and lies spiralled out of control, but you were better than this. Surely there was some sort of girl code about this kind of thing, right?

“Shit… shit, shit!” you mumbled.

“What’s wrong?” Brock asked, confused at your sudden change in demeanour.

“Sharon is over there!”

“So?”

You huffed. “She’s been in love with you since the first grade.”

“And?”

“She’s my best friend.”

“I thought you two weren’t speaking anymore.”

“We’re not, but that doesn’t mean that she’s not my best friend or that I should be out with you.”

Brock frowns. “Her and I don’t have anything in common.”

“And you and I do?” This was such a bad idea. That was the mantra playing on repeat in your mind. This was a horrible, terrible idea.

“Yeah.” His voice wavered, cracking a bit. You could see his brain scrambling to come up with anything.

“Like what?”

“Like… I hate Kae too.”

You rolled your eyes. Kaecilius. The man that hated you from day one—ever since one of his Zelots—what they called themselves—overheard you talking to Sharon in the bathroom. A religious self-centred prick that thought his ways were better than everyone else’s. Nobody’s liked him.

You scoffed, “If that’s our connection, I should just date the entire school.”

“Haven’t you?”

That right there. It should have been a warning to you. But you just shook your head, brushing it to the back of your mind to focus on something more important: getting out of there undetected.

Before even eating your food, you managed to convince Brock to leave. It wasn’t soon enough because Sharon saw you. Alone with Brock. On a date.

The betrayal on her face hit you like a punch to the stomach. What even was your life anymore?

You both rushed out of the restaurant. Tears were threatening to escape from your eyes, but you willed them away.

“I’m sorry about that,” you apologised, walking to the car. You opened the door to get in, but Brock shut it before it even got halfway open.

“Uh, I’ve got something for you.”

You tilted your head, hoping it was something romantic.

He flicked up an orange gift card. “Two hundred dollars to The Home Depot,” he said with a big smile on his face.

Your face crumpled in confusion before the realisation set in.

This wasn’t a date. No. Of course, it wasn’t. Not really. It was a way to get you to–

“Bam,” he said, all smug. As if he has done something.

“I didn’t realise this was a–“ Now the tears really were starting to form. You didn’t listen as he explained himself. You didn’t care enough to hear what he had to say. You didn’t care because once you finally thought someone had shown an interest in you, it blew up in your face. Hell, maybe you’ve deserved it. Going along with all these rumours. It was bound to bite you in the ass one way or another.

You took a breath, resolving yourself to all the age old question. “So what did we do on this date?”

“Whatever two hundred bucks gets me.”

And with that he leaned in, grabbing your chin to push his lips against yours.

Warning signs flared in your mind. Just what the hell did he think he was doing? You pushed him away. “That’s not really how it works,” you tried to explain.

He wasn’t hearing it. “It’s okay,” he muttered before closing the gap again. You hit his chest, trying to get him off of you.

“Stop!” you cried out, so fucking done with today. “I’m not really having sex with people for money. I’m saying I’m having sex, but I’m not having sex for money.”

You didn’t know what about your explanation was lost on him. How he could listen to that and still continue, maybe he just wasn’t listening in the first place.

He leaned in again, trying to reassure you. And yet again you pushed him away. “Stop! No, no! Stop!”

“What? Come on just relax, babe. It’s alright.”

It was as if he didn’t hear you the first million times you said it. It was as if you didn’t repeatedly push him away. Or maybe he was just dumb enough to continue pursuing you when you clearly didn’t want it.

Whatever the case was, you didn’t care.

So, yet again, you pushed him away. His back hit the car, and you walked away.

“Come on, this is bullshit! I paid you.”

You turned on your heel and flicked the card back at him. “Well now you didn’t.”

He yelled after you, upset that he didn’t get what he wanted. Tears began trickling down your face.

You heard your name being called out, a familiar, friendly voice. You turned around to see Bucky, white button down and all, walking towards you.

“Bucky… hi,” you couldn’t hide the way your voice wobbled even if you wanted to. You saw his fists clenched as he watched Brock’s car skirt away.

“Hey, you alright?”

“What? Oh, yeah, yeah, I’m… I’m fine.”

He frowned, not believing you for a second. The moment you walked in with Rumlow, he was angry. Be it jealousy or knowing you deserved so much better than that prick–probably both—he hated watching you two together. It was wrong.

“You sure?” Bucky frowned. He hated seeing you cry. Especially over some jerk that didn’t deserve you in the first place.

You sniffed, rubbing your nose. This day has been so awful. You just wanted to go to your warm bed, curl up and cry. If god took any liking to you, you wouldn’t wake to see the next day. But why would he after all you had allegedly done?

“I uh, just got off my shift. If you uh needed a ride home,” Bucky offered.

Despite the fact that you had just been harassed by a guy you foolishly thought you could trust, you put your trust in this one. You just hoped Bucky was better. You had no reason to be weary of his offer. He had been nothing but nice to you even when the rumours and lies began their torrent on your life.

“Really? You wouldn’t mind?”

“Nah, plus my ma would kick my ass if I left you here alone.” The corners of his eyes crinkled as he chuckled. It was adorable. “Or my sister, or Steve’s ma. Hell, even Steve would try to beat me up.”

Now that was an image. Tiny, little, asthmatic Steve trying to beat up bulky, tall, strong Bucky?

You giggled in spite of yourself. Bucky always seemed to know just what to say.

You both climbed into Bucky’s car before he took off. It was silent for the most part, letting you think back to everything that had happened today.

You watched Bucky as his hands gripped onto the steering wheel. His mouth was set in a heavy frown, and you could practically see the gears turning in his head.

“What’s up, Buck?” You tried your best to sound like Brock’s actions hadn’t bothered you as much as they had.

He sighed, glancing at you for all but a second. He rolled up to a red stoplight and used that moment to look you in the eye.

“He didn’t hurt you, did he?”

“Hmm? Oh, Brock? No, no, no. Not physically anyway.”

His eyes searched your face. He was clearly distraught. “I’m sorry.”

“What? Why?”

“I didn’t get out there soon enough, if I just got outta there sooner he wouldn’t have… and you wouldn’t have had to–”

“Light!” you nudged him.

“Right! Sorry.”

“And hey, it’s not your fault, Bucky.”

Bucky’s knuckles were white as snow. He was clenching his jaw so hard, you worried he might damage his teeth. “He wouldn’t listen to you. You said no. Multiple. Times.”

Your heart ached because you knew Bucky wasn’t going to let this go. Because he actually cared. His eyes stayed on the road, and you were surprised the asphalt didn’t spontaneously combust into flames with the ferocity behind his glare.

“But I got away, I’m okay.”

“And what if you didn’t, huh? What if I was too late? You deserve so much better, you hear me?”

You didn’t even realise he was staring right at you until you looked back at him. You were stopped at a stop sign. With no one behind you, he didn’t feel any need to keep driving.

His face morphed into pure horror as the tears began rolling down your face. You looked away from him again, to your lap this time.

“‘M sorry, doll. I didn’t mean to yell, I’m so sorry.”

You shook your head and laughed. What even was Bucky Barnes? And why the hell was he always so inherently good?

“Bucky,” you sniffed, “I’m not upset about you yelling. I’m… It’s just… you, you care? About me?”

His brows furrowed. “Well, of course I do. You’re a great person. Your sweet and smart—”

“Why are you doing this?”

“What?”

“Come on. You’ve heard the rumours, James. You aren’t living under a rock and you’re not stupid.”

“Exactly, so I’m not stupid enough to believe the lies being spread around. What I can’t seem to figure out, however, is how you got mixed up in all of this.”

“It’s a really long story.”

Bucky shrugs, “I’ve got nowhere to be.”

That is how you and Bucky ended up on top of a nearby cliff, sitting on the hood of Bucky’s car, eating snacks you got from a gas station. You told him most of the details to your unfortunate series of events that led to this moment. Bucky only stopping you every once in a while to ask questions or make threats to anyone that he claimed deserved it.

You felt like a huge weight had been lifted from your shoulders. The best part of it was, you actually thought that Bucky believed you. He held no judgement and was a total sweetheart the entire time—well, besides the times when he teased you. But even then it was all in good fun.

You shouldn’t have expected anything less from the guy that was a complete teddy bear once you peeled back his intimidating layers. He was a good man, through and through. Nothing and no one could take that away from him.

When you finished, you leaned back to look at the stars. “If I ran away and changed my name, would you come with me?”

He chuckled. “I don’t know if that’s the best course of action to take.”

“What else can I do, Bucky? You’ll be the only person that believes me!”

“Maybe I’m the only person that needs to.”

“Yeah, right. What if my supposed sex life gets passed around so that everyone knows about it. Employers? Schools? The government? I’ll be screwed!”

“Why would the government care?” he guffawed.

“I don’t know, okay! Stop laughing at me, you jerk! This is a serious crisis.”

“Okay, sorry! Sorry!”

“It’s hard to believe you’re sorry when you’re still laughing.”

He calmed down enough to stop his laughter. “Look, you and I both know this won’t go away overnight. You did dig yourself into a pretty deep hole. I don’t know how we’re going to fix it, we just will, okay?”

“Okay, and what’s in it for you?”

He hummed, taking his eyes off of the stars to look at you. “Well… I get to help you. Maybe I’d get to spend more time with you too.”

“And why would you want that?” You look down at him, surprised to find him staring back at you.

He shrugs before looking back at the sky. “You’re pretty cool.”

“Mhm, and did you make this assessment before or after all these rumours started?”

“Way before.” He looks back at you. “Maybe that night I wasn’t ready for my first kiss. The night you covered for me, and you didn’t get anything out of it. You just did it out of the goodness in your heart.”

“I… didn’t think you’d remember that…”

“Of course, I remember. I’m practically kicking myself right now for not actually kissing you.”

“Oh, yeah?”

He hummed his agreement. Your heart beat faster as his eyes dropped to your lips only momentarily. If you had blinked, you would’ve missed it.

He cleared his throat and got up. You followed after him, frowning as he took a deep sigh. “What’s wrong?”

He looked back at you, anguished. “Sorry, I didn’t mean… I’m trying to do this right, y’know. I don’t want to pressure you or anything and this is all wrong.”

“I’m not following,” you cut his ramblings short.

“I’ve… I’ve liked you for a long time… I just didn’t say anything because… well, as Steve put it, I’m too chicken shit.” He chuckled. “I should’ve done it sooner, I guess.”

You didn’t know how to respond. You were speechless. You wondered just how different your life would be if he had confessed sooner. The fact that he felt anything for you at all was… it was… you didn’t even know.

“God, this is the worst possible time to tell you. I’m such an idiot! I’m so sorry, just forget I said anything.”

“What… what if I like you too?”

Bucky froze. All of him hoped that would be your response. Truly. But he didn’t want to take advantage of you. You had just gotten done with what was probably the shitiest date of your life. You had been ostracised by everyone else. And he was the only one who held an olive branch to you. It wasn’t fair to you.

“I… I can’t… not in my right mind would I ever dream of taking advantage of you like this.”

Your face twisted. “Take advantage? Bucky, how can you take advantage of me if I like you back?”

He sighed. “You’re not thinking straight. I’m just the first guy who wasn’t a complete dickwad to you, so naturally you would like me.”

“Bucky, stop. I have liked you… for a lot longer than I care to admit. This isn’t me being desperate for any positive human connection. I genuinely like you.”

He bit his lip, looking so conflicted it hurt. You wanted to ease his worries. He shouldn’t feel that way. Not when you truly cared about him and have for a while. You’d like to think you deserved something good in your life. And if that good just so happened to be named Bucky? Well… who were you to deny it?

You advanced toward him, looking into those pale, stormy blue eyes. He said your name, a warning tone lying underneath every syllable.

“Tell me you don’t want this, and I won’t push any further,” you murmured. You were so close to him you could feel the heat from his furnace-like body. He stared into your eyes, thinking about how damn lucky he was to have such a beautiful view tonight.

“You sure you want this?” Bucky just had to ask. He needed to be sure. He didn’t even know what this was. It could be just a simple kiss, maybe a one-night stand, or, if he dared to hope, a relationship. Whatever it was, he would take it. He would be grateful for the chance to hold you, to kiss your lips and maybe more.

“Have I not made it clear enough yet?” You smirked at him. Bucky’s tongue wet his lips, a moment you traced with your eyes. He was gorgeous.

His hands cupped your face as he leaned in. You both closed your eyes as your lips met. You let him take the lead, not one hundred percent certain what you were doing.

Most people when looking back on their first kiss, regale about how horrible it was. How awkward it was and how terrible it panned out.

You were not most people.

It was easy to follow Bucky’s lead as his lips moved against yours. You hoped you were doing good with your first kiss. You hoped he liked it. Because you really liked being kissed by him.

When you broke apart for air, you opened your eyes to see him grinning like a love-sick fool. It was so endearing that you pulled him into another quick kiss.

“I never thought I’d get to do that,” Bucky murmured against your lips. They were still held in an impossibly adorable smirk that made your insides melt.

You knew right then and there, you wanted him to be your first. Your first everything. Your first kiss, your first real date (because you sure as hell weren’t counting the shitstorm from earlier as your first date), your first boyfriend, your first lover.

“I really like ya, doll. Maybe we should do this again sometime?”

“Yeah,” you breathed out, “maybe I can skip the awful date next time though.”

“Well, if you wouldn’t mind… next time you could have a nice date. With a pretty nice fella if I do say so myself. He can be a bit of a jerk sometimes, but he’ll treat ya right.”

You smirked. “‘S that so? Maybe I’ll just have to go on that date and see for myself.”

He smiled even wider. You didn’t think it was possible. “Really? Does that mean you’d wanna go on a date with me?”

“Yes, you buffoon. I thought you were supposed to be a lady’s man.”

“Hey now,” he chided, “weren’t we just having a conversation about how awful rumours could be?”

You chuckled with him as he pulled you into his arms. He pressed a gentle kiss into your hair.

“I think we should get back before my parents send out a search party.”

He laughed and agreed. Bucky drove you back to your house. Instead of curling up and crying in your bed, you ended up smiling like a lovesick fool until sleep overcame you.

Bucky Taglist: @harleycao @hallecarey1

[blond-b]

TW: €D

My new rules for myself

Try not to eat high cal foods unless it’s in front of someone else (you need to keep others thinking that you DO eat normal, but you don’t have to eat more than it takes to convince others)

No more than ONE sweet a day (you are a fat ass, and you will binge a whole tray of brownies if your not careful. Never eat more than ONE)

No excuses about exercising (aw, your a little sore? Get over it. Do at least 5 miles, unless your in extreme pain, or physically can not exercise, there is no excuse.)

Do more than cardio. (You KNOW that muscle burns more calories than fat, you also know that your tummy looks frumpy even if your skinny… unless you tone it up. Don’t be lazy, you have no excuses. Do your workouts)

Always be moving (sitting down? Wiggle your toes or bounce your feet. Laying in bed? Do leg raises, or side leg raises, and move your arms some. Standing in line? Shift weight from one leg to another. Even small movements burn more cal than if you weren’t doing them.)

Only binge on foods that don’t matter (your high and wanna binge? Okay, eat watermelon, have an ice pop, have some broccoli, or strawberries. NO JUNK, save your junk food for your sober mind to decide on)

Stay active on rest days (you get one day a week to not exercise, that however does NOT mean be lazy. Instead, clean your room, play with your dog, go swimming, clean the kitchen, do anything to get some passive movements in. Your resting your exercises muscles today, NOT your whole body.)

No lying to yourself. (You binged? You went over on cals? Ate too much of a cal dense food? LOG IT. Telling yourself “I know I messed up, I don’t need to log it to know it” has to stop. You need to be honest with your future self, she’ll ask “why didn’t I lose any weight this week??” And she deserves to look back and see why. That and lying to your app just sets yourself for failure. You won’t know how much to restrict to make it up.)

Fruit/veggie fast the day after a high cal day. (You fucked up. Get over it, and fix it. Only eat low cal fruits and vegetables the next day, you’ll feel full but still be in a cal deficit. You may be starving, but you don’t need to feel it.)

Rules I’ll be implementing when school (college) starts back up

At least one day a week, eat less than 500 cal.

Meal prep low cal high nutrient foods. (You need protein, you DONT need extra calories. Boil some chicken, shred it, add some low cal seasoning. Do NOT add unnecessary things like oils, mayo, ranch, cream cheese NO. You want the protein that why you eat. Not for enjoyment)

You have a free gym membership, use it. (Oh, it’s ‘embarrassing’ working out in front of others? Get tf over it. You need to use the treadmill, and the stair master can burn EVEN MORE. Get over yourself and do it)

Bad weather isn’t an excuse. (It’s snowing? Tuff luck. Walk your ass to the gym and go on the treadmill. Its raining? Same thing, walk your ass to the gym and work out. Excuses build fat.)

Eat within your calorie deficit every day. (you have roommates? Worried the will notice how little you eat? Say you eat breakfast in your room, they don’t know what you keep there. They start acting worried? Wake up before them, say you ate. Get home after them, say you ate out. Lie.)

Rules for once I hit my UGW (125lbs)

Don’t stop. (So, your skinny now? So what. You can still look better. You can still lose fat. It’s time to focus on BUILDING muscle. Of course, not too much you don’t want to look like a man, but enough that you could be a swimsuit model.)

Track with Pictures more than anything (the plan is to build some muscle while cutting fat still now, yeah? So the number on the scale won’t be a completely accurate reflection of your efforts anymore {this does not mean stop weighing yourself}. You can look skinnier and weigh more with muscle, and we care about LOOKS not numbers)

Don’t let the doc.’s know. (This is where building muscle can come in handy. You don’t want to be stopped, so weigh a “healthy” weight, but let that “healthy” weight come from muscle, not fat. They never have to know.)

Don’t get bulky. (Yes, we’ve now switched mindsets from LOSING weight to GAINING muscle. That does not mean get bulky. Your goal is to look like a activewear model. Toned, fit, strong, but still dainty.)

Don’t stop cardio. (Cardio is what will KEEP you lean. Adding strength training does not allow you to cut out cardio. Remember, we NEVER want to look bulky.)

[chipadequeso]

can you talk about vishals prison stay …🙁 what did he do how did he feel etc etc. and on the other hand of things can you talk some about solenne? how does xe dress and what music does xe listen to and any other cool fun facts ^_^ hi holly

STRIKES A LITTLE POSE . OK hi nora THIS IS KIND OF LONG AS FUCK

on vishal in prison it was kind of permanently stuck in this ambiguous place of grief for Someone it didnt fully get to know , mixed with its resentment that had been building up for Years and was kind of bursting into the most utter Despise for benito. he was always permanently Uncomfortable with who he was and in his own body and his comfort came from the few interests he held (which were already becoming Less and less present since he was permanently overworked and stressed out before blen's death in the first place) so now he didnt even have that anymore ! It also falls into the desperation of oh my god Why the fuck didnt i do anything which feeds into why didnt i do anything years ago either and the cycle of suffering is unending!! inaction (both in that it didnt Do something (get it?) when it could have to save blen and that it didnt kill them in the first place) was the worst possible choice. it doesnt know if it deserves this or if it was going to happen sooner or later or what all it knows is it's life is ruined and it hates. benito ituarte. to everyone around him he's a Mix of a scared trembling animal and the fact that he is a 20 year old convicted murderer so i dont Think hes having much of an okay time at all just in general. he got out after 2 years due to good conduct (his being driven to insanity with pain was pretty much just eating him alive internally and he was always okay with helping out and also look at that guy). vishal :<

on solenne !!!!! yaaaaay ^-^ she's a butch through and through and her wardrobe is 90% sports bras and tank tops. she works as a delivery girl (similar to her high school best friend camila fernando who delivers pizzas) . xe Has an insanely cool motorbike !!!!which xe uses for work. the sun is her passion the sun helped her feel better and healed her when she was struggling and she'll always prefer to be sweating under a heatwave if it means she still has the shine hitting her face. she's rather obstinate in doing what keeps her at comfort. not very talkative + her sunglasses keep her communication to the specific way she could be flashing her smile. sephardic jew and is a non-blood cousin of naomi (and LUCY KOGEN!!!!! who lives in buenos aires argentina)^-^

[pleasantlycrazyworld]

Eddie Munson X Female reader 

Summary: Jason is an ass and he really hurts your feeling and get you into your head. Eddie finds out an comforts you. 

You and Eddie had been friends for years. You two grew up in the trailer park together and because of the slight age difference you started high school later then he did, but once you two were in there together, you were inseparable.

Things were going great until Eddie got a crush on Chrissy. Hellfire, including yourself, always teased him for it but when the jocks got a sliver of knowledge that the freak had a thing for the princess all hell broke.

You were walking to English by yourself since Eddie had a dealing to do when Jason pulled you aside. You instantly put a guard up not knowing exactly what he wanted but you knew it wasn't going to be good. "I knew the freak would cave soon enough. I just thought you'd realize you deserved better first. Honestly it’s pathetic lets be real. Even the freak knows you aren’t enough." You don't hear much after he said this you can see his mouth still moving but your ears started ringing and it was like your body went into flight mode with you not in control anymore. You walk past him and go start to the bathroom, skipping class entirely.

Eddie shows up to class late but he can tell something is off as soon as he walks in. You aren't taking notes, you don't have post its all over your desk writing quotes you can use for the final paper, hell you weren't even in your normal seat. Where the hell did you go? He's dying to find you but he knows you'll kill him for skipping class anymore. He reluctantly stays in class hoping you just left early.

Chrissy is actually the one to tell Eddie the location of his best friend. "Eddie!" He hears someone call out over the last bell of the day. "I was in the bathroom and I heard your friend crying really hard. She's in the bathroom, the one on second floor, b-but Eddie I mean it, she's crying really hard." Eddie can hear how out of breath Chrissy is as she explains where you are but he feels his heart fall hearing you're crying. He says a quick thank you before rushing to the second floor himself. 

He arrives to the girl bathroom completely out of breath when he immediately just walks in. Girls yell for him to get out but he just rolls his eyes and asks where you are. By the time he gets there you are nothing but sniffles and whimpers, he can hear which stall you’re in and as he looks over to the stall one of the girls who was trying to comfort you pushes the other girls out before sending him a soft smile. He walks softly and knocks on the stall door, he waits to hear you say “come in” and he doesn’t hesitate scared you’ll take back your words. 

He sees you sitting on the floor holding onto yourself. “Oh sweetheart” he softly says as he walks over to you before sitting down and pulling you into his side. “What happened?” He asks while brushing your hair away from your face. His heart aches seeing your eyes red and swollen like your lips, your cheeks having angry streaks down them. Something seriously hurt you if it had you allow yourself to cry in public. 

You whimper remembering everything that happened all over again. 

Your voice starts to break as you explain to him what Jason said. “I know I shouldn’t listen to that ass but...I am not enough for you Eddie, you deserve to have the best friends and the best relationships and you can’t get that with me, it’s obvious to everyone how pathetic I am.” 

He’s heart shatters hearing you but he starts to feel seriously nauseas hearing you call him Eddie, it’s been years since that name passed through your lips. Ever since middle school he was Ed’s or E even, but he was never Eddie and it felt awful saying it but now your whole world feels flipped. 

He shakes his head as soon as you finish talking. “Sweetheart you are so wrong. I love having you in my life, you’ve been apart of it for so long I couldn’t imagine having a day go by without you. Don’t listen to that ass, he’s so so wrong with everything he says but especially with anything that he says about you” He can tell that your brain isn’t allowing you to believe his words but you nod along and hold him close to you. 

“Thank you Ed’s” You mutter into his chest and the both of you can tell just from that sentence things will get okay. 

If you enjoyed please consider liking, reblogging, and commenting. It all means alot to me <3 

[jxcotts]

what's your honest opinion about the love interests? (both mcl and eldarya)

for example, no matter how handsome some of them are, I just can't like them (in fact, most of them are annoying to me)

ugh no yall gonna hate me forever lmao- ANYWAYS🥹

nath & nevra: they are so similar, their story, behavior so its pretty easy to love them both (i mean if they r your type lol), they can do no wrong😎 i cant really express my love for them, but yall know how much they mean to me so WHATEVER, just stan them !

armin: ahh he's such a cutie but also was very thoughtless, he did some bad shit in high school, but idk i just love him so much, best friends brother AND the gamer boyfriend trope are VERY entertaining💋

kentin: yeah well im not that okay w going from good boy to bad boy bc why???? and he was pretty rude to candy, when they were childhood friends and she did nothing wrong to him so i didnt understand it, but when he changed he was such a cutie. alternate life kentin is just ughhh THE CUTEST.

castiel: the good girl x bad boy trope is awesome, but sometimes he's an asshole, especially when he teases nath (high school), hate him for that, but his character development was cool and tbh i really REALLY like him w amber so... i have to say that she would've been the better choice, not candy. DON'T HATE ME. they were just more interesting TO ME. he and candy r lovely as friends tho <3

priya & hyun: they are cute and good friends! priya deserves everything and more <3

rayan: unpopolar opinion: hes ugly. and what the fuck. a teacher? lol.

eric: 😆 you dont want me to talk about this shithead, worst """love interest""" ever. please, you cant even call him as it lmao

lysander: well... ah please dont exile me, but hes a colorless character. the whole person is boring as hell to me.

ezarel: MAN I MISS HIM SM... hes such a silly character, im mad beemoov didnt bring him back in s2 and that nevra never talks abt him when they were like brothers. id love to see him and miiko in ep 20 (im a delulu<3).

leiftan: idk i just love his demonic side and his obsession with erika in s1🤭🤭 he's so supportive, but in s2 his story is so sad lol, he deserves better. he's not even that happy anymore-,, i love the tension between him and nevra lmaoo

valkyon: :) i love him as a friend and he def deserves so much better. i wish they could bring him back:/

uhh... help. ill be short.

the traitors: so... lance in s1 was EVERYTHING. i loved how cute he was with erika once or twice lol, but still, as the enemy its something. i just dont understand why beemoov didnt see the potential in season ONE ; the enemies to lovers trope would have been the greatest. seriously. uhm... no comment for season 2. i hate him as much as i can, lets be honest he looks like an annoying rat (SORRY) and im sorry beemoov, but i will NOT accept the enemies to lovers NOW after he killed his brother. erika had every opportunity to kill him, but ofc beemoov, keep him.

yeah about mathieu, hes as colorless as lysander, but even more.

manifesting an execution for both <3 (still a delulu😘)

if you still like me after all this, i love u:')