#its neither fully good nor fully bad

[cut-catches]

me after watching the imaginary friend mv for the sixth time today and i still cried lol

[candymeatlemonspiced]

Agrhrhshrh 💥💥 I'm the best for sure

[jiminrings]

if-then

pairing: jungkook x reader

wordcount: 7k

glimpse: you're an alien in prince jungkook's planet — both literally and figuratively.

alternatively, jungkook gives his nickname for you to someone else in a fit of anger, and you've never been more upset.

[ fluff, angst, painfully oblivious n dense alien koo, mutual pining (yes MUTUAL!!!!), the glaring concept of not being good n whole enough to deserve love (yikes but i Swear it gets better), mentions of injuries ]

notes: after being asked for literal years to write an alien au, it's finally here!!!! mwah thank u for patiently waiting :D

as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!!

Jungkook’s fond of appraising things.

He’s fond of assigning values to things that may or may not hold some bit of importance to his life, whether its value proves itself in the present or the future. Jungkook likes setting his literal ducks in a row, and the little inanimate yellow tokens that his brother brought back from Earth serve as a discreet (not really, though) reminder that he may have some hoarder tendencies.

Jungkook’s not really a hoarder-hoarder; it just happens that he likes keeping things, sometimes for no apparent reason at all.

He likes swiping the flashlights that the night guards use to stash in his own personal “emergency” (not that there’s ever been one, nor will there ever be) cabinet, just because he wants to be prepared for a natural catastrophe that won’t probably ever happen in his area. He’s already seen a couple of films that humans have made, and if ever comes a time that Planet Twell has a dinosaurian monster battle it out with a gigantic prehistoric ape, Jungkook’s proud to say that he has a couple flashlights for him and his brothers to use.

In addition, Jungkook likes picking flowers just before they go out of season. His eldest brother’s already cussed him out for it, but he’ll still do what he does best (?), if best means “preserving” the flowers by drowning them in water every ten minutes so they wouldn’t wilt and he’d still get to see them during off-peak days.

Prince Jungkook likes appraising things in his own definition and pace. They’re never categorized in his head for what they actually do, but for what kind of unexplainable fulfillment fills his chest whenever he thinks about the item.

The youngest prince of Twell didn’t like it when there was a commotion at the lily field and the citizens ran out to see what it was about, instead of eating their slices of cake with the fondant that he made out of scratch. Jungkook didn’t like the fondant either because there must be something insanely wrong with itself (or it’s just that he made it just as bad), but he didn’t like being alone either when finding out about the taste.

He didn’t like seeing the tiger lilies he planted himself squished underneath an unknown figure, who may or may not have fallen from the sky, judging by the way you’re wincing alone with no aircraft, no parachute, nor any other person with you.

Jungkook didn’t like seeing you, an alien, who’s just as confused with the entire ordeal. You can’t remember anything about how or why you’ve gotten here — all you know is your name and who you are, and unexpectedly so, the first prince who’s gotten to where you are isn’t so thrilled about the fact.

He’s fond of appraising things, and although he’s not extremely excited about you just as he had been when Yoongi brought home trinkets from him during his trip to Earth (including the very seeds for the tiger lilies you’ve destroyed), he’ll make do.

Jungkook will try and make you mean something, if not everything, to him.

.

.

.

Prince Jungkook has come to learn that you’re part human.

You’re neither fully his kind nor his type (or atleast that’s what he thinks so) and he doesn’t know what to feel about that. He doesn’t know what to feel about only the slight panic that filled you knowing that it’s still unexplained of how or why you’re in Twell; even more, he doesn’t know what to feel that you’re neither scared nor intimidated by him.

You don’t know what to feel either when Jungkook, who’s only mildly shocked about your existence in general, delivers his first question to you and it’s not of the sort that you expected. He looks soft and round, unlike the hearsay about his kind that only amounts to half of you. He doesn’t look aloof and unaccepting at all — if anything, he looks at you like you’re the one who’s cruel instead of him.

Jungkook almost completely does not care about who you are or where you’re from, but what he cares about is if you have any trinkets with you that he could possibly have. Out of anything he could possibly solicit from you, he only asks for so little, no matter how odd.

“T-trinkets?” you squeak, brows raising in surprise. “I’m sorry, Prince Jungkook — y-you’re asking if I have trinkets so you could have them?”

“Yeah,” he nods, lips pursed and cheeks puffed out as he confirms your confusion. “It’s my birthday, and I want to have a trinket.”

“Oh,” you blink once, twice,  a small smile playing on your lips to replace the fact that you’ve been confused for the entire half hour since you came back to consciousness. “Happy birthday, prince.”

“I see.” 

“It’s thank you,” you mutter automatically, coughing lightly when he only knits his brows at you. He’s cute this way — innocent, even. “I-I mean you’re supposed to say thank you when someone greets you, or when someone does something nice for you in general.”

“Okay. My brother forgot to teach me that,” Jungkook hums in recognition, eyes briefly glowing with a bluish hue before he regains his composure. “Thank you.”

You wonder if staring is also frowned upon in this planet.

You wonder if it would get you a mean glare or a sarcastic snicker if you were to stare at Prince Jungkook a little longer without any thoughts floating in your brain, except for the fact that you are completely unaware that you’re already zoning out on him. 

You wonder if it would be wrong for your eyes to take in every single detail of him from his short hair that softly falls onto his forehead, to his supposed birthday attire that only consists of a white button-up, to his gleaming royal jewelry that rightfully so, only looks like it would belong to him and him only.

“Trinket?” he reminds you, head tilting and eyes widening as he cranes his neck to look at you beyond the table that separates the both of you.

“Oh! U-uhm,” you scour your pockets immediately just to present something, and bluntly put, you haven’t even checked your well-being, much less the possessions you have on yourself. You feel more than relieved to know that it isn’t empty, because oddly enough, you’d feel a little upset— a little down if you were to disappoint a prince you just met not more than an hour ago. “I have this handkerchief, I guess.”

“Perfect!” Jungkook exclaims, leaning to grab the baby blue square from you that’s embroidered with your initials that are unfamiliar to him. He clutches it into his hand tightly with a smile on his face, the happiness later dwindling when he realizes he has no clue of what he’s holding. “What is it supposed to do?”

You blank at that, meekly scratching your temple. “Nothing, I think. It’s just there for most people, but I’ve never had to use it.”

“You’ve never had to use it, but you still take it with you?” he attempts to clarify, a slight frown embedded into his lips as he looks down on your averagely prized possession.

“I don’t mean never as in never ever, and I’ve used it a couple of times like everyone else does, but it’s just-…” you trail off, shrugging helplessly because you can’t describe the concept of nothing to him easily. “It’s just there.”

You’re more than fatigued and a lot more confused (albeit less worried) about the semantics of your presence here in Twell, specifically in Prince Jungkook’s office, but the latter doesn’t seem to take mind as he takes you with an open mind.

“Okay. Thank you. I’ll have it,” he announces, shifting his eyes between you and your (his now) handkerchief that he’s slowly and hesitantly unraveling, only to put back into its original square form after every move.

“You will?” you almost snort, a tiny bit amused that a prince is clenching your handkerchief like its the most interesting thing in the galaxy.

“Yes,” he hums distractedly, looking up at you as he lightly scratches the embroidered teddy bear at the corner of the fold. “I will have you too.”

“You will?! You’re not going to dispose me or anything?” you straighten immediately, eyes more frantic and disbelieving to hear that you’re being taken care of (or something of the sort) than just awhile ago when you were unsure of your fate. “Why?”

“Don’t know,” Jungkook shrugs just as easily as you do. “I just want to.”

( ♡ ) 

Prince Jungkook isn’t so bad, and neither is Twell.

The planet isn’t so bad in the sense that although you don’t feel the most welcome you have ever been in your entire life, there’s a recognition that seeps into your bones that some of them, if not most, would set out a plate for you if ever Jungkook came into their homes. He’s the social butterfly of his family; the baby lamb that’s set out into the field to check up on everyone else and act as a mannequin of sorts that’s a little less superficial, and a little more warm.

Jungkook isn’t so bad either in the sense that although it’s the bare minimum to do so, he doesn’t throw his kindness back to your face even in the most critical situations, with now being the sole exception.

With the exception of now, Prince Jungkook has not ever acted rashly towards you. He wasn’t annoyed with you when you kept asking him questions of what it would mean to act as his security detail, and he wasn’t irked either when your questions about your heritage (and his by extension) toed personal lines that no one else would dare cross.

With the exception of now, Jungkook’s never acted rude towards you. He wasn’t as guarded with your existence like his older brothers were; as a matter of fact, he even came to your defense when some of them theorized that you were only here in their planet to act as a precursor for their downfall.

With the exception of now, Jungkook’s never been this cruel; with the ultimatum of his pride over your heart, he’s never made you feel this different and alienated from him — with, of course, the exception of now.

Heartbreak is a human emotion.

The weakness of the concept is disturbingly human and vulnerable. There’s no escape from it, even if the said percentage of human in your blood is barely half and could light a candle to your more evolved, far more powerful Twellian genes. It’s a sickening emotion to feel, much more have it get you carried away from what you have to do at hand.

The grip that said heartbreakhas on you is unimaginable, far more different than what your people, not humans, tell you how it’d feel like. There had already been an uproar when it was announced that you were appointed as Prince Jungkook’s guard, the news of an impure Twellian bearing the coveted position receiving every reaction possible — from fear, to distaste, and even to genuine amazement.

All of the kingdom’s advisers had theorized that despite you of being impure heritage, youwere superior in terms of physical capabilities. With everything else you’ve been theorized to lack at, you bite at the possibility that the ache in your chest is attributed to your stunted emotions.

You feel painfully human. You feel what heartbreak is, and compared to what others have made it out to be, it’s an emotion that you can’t put into words.

“You can’t, Jungkook,” you firmly say once more with your ears ringing, not because the volume of the club makes you want to get down on your knees, but because you’ve perhaps heard something far worse; far more grating, and far more overwhelming than what your heart could even bear. "All of your brothers specifically insisted for me to bring you back before midnight."

They say that your hearing’s supposed to be better. They say that you could see far more colors than what your alien counterpart could ever do. They say that for everything else you lacked, you made up for with the way you’re more physically advanced and therefore adept to protecting the planet’s youngest prince.

No one’s ever said that you’ll be safe from Jungkook himself.

"Jungkook, let's go home. Please," you plead through your teeth, the word you’ve last spoken being the latest term you’ve taught him. Jungkook, along with everyone else, is not familiar with begging; they’re not familiar with desperation so wrung out, there’s actually a word made just for it.

Jungkook only scowls at you, eyes turning a bright red as opposed to his usual pink allotted for you. "Butt out," he murmurs, tightly crossing his arms as his nostrils flare involuntarily. ”You promised me I could be out tonight."

You’re starting to get over the heartbreak little by little, the tantrum thrown by the young prince making you indifferent. 

Maybe you just misheard a few minutes ago — maybe, it was only a fluke and you didn’t hear it correctly the first time. Maybe it’s only your faulty impureness that made you susceptible to just hearing your nickname out of nowhere. Maybe, it’s not heartbreak that you were feeling, but rather only a subdued version of it by seeing Jungkook disappointed at you doing your job.

It’s your fault, you guess. Perhaps it’s the fault of the bustle of the club and the hundreds of dialects you could hear all at once finally got to you, overwhelming you to the point that you heard Jungkook calling for your name, despite not looking at you all.

You’re about to plead even more for the both of you to go back already; to save him from a lecture from all of his brothers and for you to be spared an even harsher scolding because they think you’ve gone too soft for him — but then you hear it. Again. 

Jungkook clenches his jaw tightly, eyes glowing a bright magenta before he opens his mouth.

"Come on, princess," he calls you by his term of endearment for you, yet his hand is outstretched for the female Twellian on his side.

He’s not calling you — he’s not even paying attention to you. Jungkook isn’t giving you a shred of his focus but he wants you to hear him call someone else the endearment he had playfully made up for you, to which you grew accustomed to without fail. He wants you to see how he gives it to someone else easily, the syllables falling from his tongue easily getting into the girl’s head.

Jungkook wants you to know how angry he is over you doing your job, he hits you where it hurts. He has no idea what heartbreak is supposed to feel like, but he doubts that you’d even feel that emotion over what he’s done — and if you actually do over something seemingly simple (for him atleast), he could only think that everyone else is exaggerating what it felt like.

Your heart, whatever is human of it, skips. It tightens and it loosens alarmingly so, almost as if you have no control for the liquid hurt that compromises you.

“I’ll show you a good time tonight, princess,” Jungkook whispers to her ear loudly for good measure, eyes darting up at you, only for him to see that you’ve been watching the whole time. 

You almost can’t tear your eyes away until Jungkook crashes his lips into hers, your nickname easily falling out of his lips as if the endearment is free for everyone; as if it’s never been yours in the first place and you only borrowed it out of desperation.

Your whole flight home is quiet.

Jungkook makes it back home before midnight, but you don’t.

( ♡ ) 

Jungkook’s been looking for you the whole day.

He’s been looking for you since he woke up, and that was fifteen ungodly hours ago when he had risen in a cold sweat. Jungkook felt sick to his stomach, and despite his insistence that something must be severely wrong with him for him to feel that way, the palace doctor (along with every other physician, healer, and reader he knew of) confirmed that nothing was out of place.

Jungkook’s supposedly okay, yet it feels like every part of him is being wrung dry. There’s an ache to his chest that renders him stupid because he feels like he’s forgotten every word, every lesson, and every vaguest bit of semblance that would detail about what he felt.

All of a sudden, Jungkook feels like he’s forgotten what the palace looks like. It’s as if he’s forgotten how tiles are supposed to feel cold on bare feet and how bleak his days are when he doesn’t have you by his side, even if the palace is also occupied by his brothers and the grounds are teeming with staff.

The young prince suddenly feels that he’s forgotten the very layout of his home because his mouth is agape at each room he walks in, simply because you’re not there. He’s practically turned the palace upside down just to grab a whiff of you somehow, and yet you’re nowhere to be found. 

Nothing from his or his brothers’ belongings are missing. There’s not a single piece of furniture that’s tilted askew. Nothing has been taken from Jungkook except his peace of mind and the capacity to just stay still because your sudden disappearance unsettles him like no other.

.

.

.

You’re back home, except you’re no longer dressed in the same outfit you left him in. 

Your uniform’s been ditched for something more casual — something more worn and lived in to the point that it looks like a shirt that’s never been yours in the first place. The sight of you, dressed in clothes that’s not yours, puts a bitter taste to Jungkook’s mouth.

He’s never been that selfish before. He’s generous and lenient as far as a prince could go, and yet he’s never felt this territorial over something seemingly as trivial as a shared garment.

The concern feels too vulnerable to the point that only a silly human, something Jungkook’s not, would consider it as a burden.

“Where were you?” he asks with the gentleness he didn’t think he’d possess after being worried shitless about you, the panic he had harbored for the longest time immediately dissipating at you.

Jungkook wants to be mad at you so, so, so badly. He wants to be angry at the way it was irresponsible for you to be alone because after all, your strength wouldn’t compensate for the gleaming fact that you’re not from here in the first place.

“I was on my leave,” you answer simply, keeping your hands behind your back as if this was any other outing with Prince Jungkook and not just Jungkook, the same man who’d call you princess for fun and hold your hand just for the sake of it.

“I didn’t say you could be on leave,” he lowers his voice, jaw tightening at the sight of you being indifferent towards him.

“I asked your brothers.”

Jungkook feels that sickness again. He feels that tinge of metal that lingers in the roof of his mouth and he wants to spit it out in front of you just to see if he’d find something else that’s not the sensations he’s been experiencing since you came around; if he’d find something else that’s not your doing yet affects him just as much.

“What if I needed protecting, hm? What if something happened to me while you were gone?” Jungkook half-taunts, shrinking on himself despite doing his hardest to appear big by crossing his arms.

“I knew you were in good hands, prince,” you tense, the tide that comes with your tone washing over Jungkook until he drowns in the realization that you were there while she was in his quarters. “I made to sure to hear that you were in very good company before I left.”

( ♡ ) 

Jungkook’s on a self-imposed break from his duties.

The prince’s duties almost exclusively involved chatting and being charismatic in general, along with the occasional goodwill event wherein he had to be all over the place just to take care of things, and not once did he ever take this long of a radio silent break — or atleast that’s what one of his brothers said.

He’s been cooped up in his room since you came back two weeks ago. Despite your absence (if you could even call it that) that barely lasted for an entire day, along with your confrontation just spanning within minutes, it’s been theorized by one of Jungkook’s brothers, again, that it’s because of your doing.

The youngest prince is theorized to be sulking over you and you simply cannot believe it.

You refuse to believe that Jungkook is bedridden with sadness because to begin with, his kind isn’t even supposed to feel such type of intense emotion. He shouldn’t be swayed by you — he shouldn’t be preoccupied with such pathetic, human emotion that you thought only you could feel because of him.

You rebuff the idea that he’s paralyzed with guilt, not only because you feel that it’s physically impossible for him to be, but because it’s him. Someone of Jungkook’s power and influence wouldn’t be so ridden with guilt that he refuses to show his face to you because he’s ashamed of hurting you.

You reject with your whole heart each and every idea that his brothers pitch you. You stay stationary with Jungkook and yet you will yourself to amount to something, even if it isn’t for him, just so the sickening feeling of being replaced won’t ever creep up to you.

You’re in love with him and it’s terrifying.

What’s even more terrifying is that you’re not the only one who knows so.

“I suggest not falling in love with Jungkook.”

You look up so sharply, your neck aches at the speed. Yoongi stands above you with a perfunctory smile, and with just the tiny bit of effort for him to come near you almost makes you forget that he’s Jungkook’s brother who had been particularly vocal about being wary of you.

“I’m sorry?” you murmur in disbelief, eyes wide and unblinking as you take into account his perfect tone.

“It’s obvious, you know?” he smiles tightly, pulling a chair to sit himself down across from you. Yoongi looks relaxed as he takes you in, almost as if he hasn’t spent half a year avoiding you. “I’ve seen the way you look at my brother. I’ve seen it over and over again when I was sent for a mission on your planet.”

You want to ask him why he’s telling you this. You want to ask badly why he’s saying this now when you’ve been certain for the longest time that your adoration for Jungkook wasn’t apparent in a land of creatures that don’t know what love, in your own terms, is supposed to look like.

You want to ask Yoongi why it shouldn’t be Jungkook, but you can’t bring yourself to — not because you know the answer deep down in your subconscious, but because you’re afraid that he would only make sense—

That he’d only solidify why Jungkook should never be in your orbit.

“Oh,” you swallow the lump in your throat. “How do you like my planet then?”

“You’re changing the subject.”

“I’m sorry, my prince,” you immediately apologize, looking down on your lap as you wait for the impeding lecture; maybe even the impending punishment (you’re not sure what it is, but you know it would hurt someway and somehow) that comes with loving the prince, even by the sidelines.

“Jungkook is a wildcard at best,” he trails off, exhaling heavily as he listens for the heartbeat in the room behind you that houses his brother. “He’s brash and stubborn. He’s driven by emotions we are not even supposed to have.”

If Yoongi stands up now and jiggles the knob to Jungkook’s room with just the slightest bit of force, he can guarantee that the latter would be falling face-down to the floor, just because of the way he has his ears pressed to the door.

Jungkook is moping and sulking and to this day, he does remain miserable — the aforementioned factors don’t stop him from being desperate and nosy.

“What I’m saying is that he’s weak, Y/N,” Yoongi sighs. “The strong isn’t for the weak. That’s always been the case.”

“I know I’m weak, prince, but I-…”

“What?” the prince laughs out loud, the smile on his face wide and cheery. He’s so amused with you that his eyes glow into pink, throwing his head back as he regains his composure. “Jungkook’s the weak one. Not you, obviously,” he snorts. “He’s basically a loser with a crown on his head. He’s the one who doesn’t deserve you and not the other way around.”

You’re not the one who’s being insulted, and yet it feels like it. Your throat tingles and your ribs burn at the sudden urge for you to protect Jungkook, even if he’s in no real threat; even if it feels like all the baser parts of you are coming together just to make sense of the way you grow simultaneously weak and strong for him.

Jungkook, the actual subject who’s being insulted and is proving his brother right by being weak because he’s wallowing in his room out of self-deprecation, sadly hums to himself in agreement.

“I’m not-…”

“Don’t refute it — that’s an order.”

“Prince Yoongi,” you relent, trying to find the right words. “May I ask why you’re telling me this?”

“Because Jungkook’s weak,” Yoongi answers simply. “I’m just saying that you don’t have to be weak with him and for him.”

( ♡ ) 

You’re eating dinner by yourself in the staff room when Jungkook walks in.

It’s the first you’ve seen of him in three weeks. He’s evidently moving on from what seems to have been a rough period for him, right when you’re at your lowest that you’ve ever been.

Prince Jungkook decides that after three weeks, he should take you by surprise and meet you in the staff room wherein you’re alone, pushing your dinner around your plate instead of doing any other menial task you’ve assigned yourself just so it would feel like you’re in use.

You’re just there. You just happen to be there and no one, even you, could do anything about it. You just happen to be there with no exact purpose and it’s gnawing at you from the inside out.

It feels all over again that your family is the runt of the entire extended bloodline. It feels that you’re not remarkable enough for your relatives to surround you and that you don’t amount to anything enough, in whatever aspect it is, to get a shred of attention that isn’t pity,

It feels like the sinking sensation in your chest wherein you have to see that all your mom could contribute to the table is her trusted homemade recipe during holidays, lost amongst a sea full of pre-ordered meals that only your relatives could afford. Like it’s how your dad’s side of the family is borderline batshit crazy and he’s the only one that turned out to be good, and you can’t do anything but watch strangers your have for blood relatives belittle you. Familiarly so, it’s like you’re a kid again with your siblings sitting on the carpet and cleaning up wrapping paper from gifts, not because the gifts are for you, but because you just happen to be there.

You feel like the alien that you are wherein you don’t belong; wherein your family has to sit on the spare chairs dug up from the basement, situated on a portable table outside of the actual, solid dining table where everyone’s sat. 

Jungkook sits with you at that dusty, old portable table. He sits himself on the flimsy chair that’s only used for stepping and for laundry.

Jungkook sits with you, not because he just happens to be there, but because he’s there for you.

“I’m… sorry for calling someone else princess.”

“It’s no problem,” you murmur, putting your fork down as you keep your hands glued to your knees underneath the table.

“But there is a problem,” Jungkook counters, lowering his head to get you to look at him yet you don’t budge. “I’m not okay with calling anyone else princess other than you.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not.”

“Then suit yourself,” you quip, even with your voice shaky and your vision blurry.

“I’m-…” Jungkook starts again, racking his brain for the limited vocabulary he has that surely isn’t enough to make up for his grave msitake. “I’m very sorry for making you feel bad. It must have hurt.”

“It’s no problem.”

“There’s a problem,” he insists. “I’m saying sorry because I hurt you.”

“You didn’t hurt me.”

“But I did,” he frowns, beyond confused to why you keep denying the fact that he’s hurt you in ways he can’t even imagine.

“You really didn’t.”

“Why do you not want me to say sorry?” Jungkook questions, voice raising yet he still looks confused— innocent, even. “Did I… hurt you that much?”

It’s the last straw for you. The pure innocence in Jungkook’s words is and should be the last straw for you because it only makes you realize that he’d never understand you. It resonates in your head, more than ever, that you’ll never be able to understand him fully either because you’ll never be the same.

The only option the universe provides you is for you to love Jungkook halfway.

“You’ll have to excuse me, Prince Jungkook. I shall go back to-…”

“Can I not say sorry to you?” Jungkook bursts, darting his hand out blindly to get a hold on you before you leave.

“You can’t say sorry to me because all of this would feel real,” you ramble, shaking your head vehemently. “You should not say sorry to me because that would mean that I’m hurt because I love you.”

Jungkook looks at you innocently with his eyes wide and lips parted, blissfully unaware of the name to the sensation that keeps tugging at his chest to the point that it feels like it would burst open, yet above all else, he still dives in head-first.

“Can you not love me, princess?” he tilts his head. “Is it not allowed?”

( ♡ ) 

Yoongi’s words lie heavily on both you and Jungkook.

The prince’s sentiment stays on your chest like a paperweight that only grows heavier the more that you try to push it off. You know Yoongi means well, no matter how his words come across otherwise, but the longer that you think about his own suggestion regarding his brother, the more you feel unsure.

Jungkook’s made complete sense of his brother’s words on the other hand, and instead of being filled with a type of rage that only bubbles up when being looked down on, oddly enough, he comes to the truth quite easily.

He knows the truth that he’s weak despite painting himself the opposite, and he feels it the most now that you’re the one who’s distancing yourself from him. Jungkook feels like swallowing the sun and chasing it down with water when you respond to princess, even if it’s jokingly uttered by his brothers and not said sincerely by him alone.

He knows the truth that he’s the weak one in the family, if not the weakest, whenever he stands next to them. Jungkook may be the poster prince for the citizens but he knows the most out of everyone that he’s not as vital to the kingdom as the others are. He may get an assigned seat at the actual, solid dining table, but he knows that he’s not at the head of it.

He knows he’s weak, with and for you, and that’s never bothered him until it actually did.

Jungkook’s eyesight isn’t as good as yours.

Unlike you, he’s restrained by the entirety of his Twellian blood from immediately focusing his gaze on anything. There’s a lag that registers whenever he fixes his sight on anything, just like everyone else but you, and that hadn’t been a bother to Jungkook the whole time.

He had falsely assumed that since you’re the only one who’s different here, the only exception in the planet by being impure and partially human, you’d be the one who’ll have a hard time adjusting your daily life to his — not the other way around.

Jungkook, who had not once ever felt insecurity before, suddenly feels inferior. He feels like dirt and yet he’s angry, not because of the fact that he comes second to your abilities, but because he can’t do shit when it comes to you.

The prince’s eyesight isn’t good enough to notice the tiny little expressions that litter your face whenever something remotely intriguing happens to you. His hearing isn’t on par with yours because he can’t register the laugh in your voice as quickly as you could recognize his. He’s not on the same level as you and it’s only now that it bothers him—

The realization creeps into Jungkook, slowly yet unsettlingly, when he sees the cut on your cheek; the liquor of inferiority, chased down by Jungkook’s own rage, only hits him the moment he sees that a nasty bruise is blossoming by the corner of your eye.

Jungkook grips your jaw lightly out of nowhere, making you look up at him unexpectedly when you had been only preoccupied with fixing him his drink. The prince, no matter the unmistakeable rage that’s brewing in red, is the softest he’s ever been when it comes to addressing you.

“Who hurt you?” 

He has all his attention on you and it’s almost sickening with the way he doesn’t want to break off. Jungkook’s hand is still on your jaw and his eyes are still fixed on yours and yet his mind, whatever remains rational of it and not just vengeful, is going a million miles per hour.

“Get your hands off me,” you spit, suddenly overwhelmed by his presence and the vitriol that spills out of him so clearly, the air around both of you shifts.

“I asked you a question,”Jungkook repeats, putting is hand on your wrist firmly instead. He makes the grave mistake of looking down, though, because as soon as he realizes that there’s blood caked underneath your nails and that your knuckles are stained with your own blood, Jungkook can no longer hold himself back. “Who. Hurt. You.”

Jungkook’s reflexes are slow, but the moment your bottom lip trembles in vulnerability and pure bitterness, he feels as if time has caught on to the point that it’s only your anguish that sharpens his senses.

His feelings, even.

“If I tell you, would it make a difference? If I’m considered weak, Jungkook, then that means you’re even weaker,” you scoff, eyes trained on the ground with your head low so you could muffle the tremble in your voice; not that it would make your prince any less attuned to you.

Jungkook’s eyes remain narrowed at you, breathing heavily as you only state the facts not to insult him, but to remind the both of you of your place — or whatever is left clear of it because Jungkook can’t even think straight the longer that he looks at you hurting.

“What, prince? What are you gonna do about it?” you spit as the last resort, standing up abruptly to storm off and make an escape for it just once so you’ll be free of the burden of being yourself in Jungkook’s existence, yet he doesn’t let you.

The grip that the prince has on your arm is unstable yet unyielding at the same time, as if it’s taking everything in Jungkook to remain standing despite wanting to hunch over by the unexplainable tremor that roots from his chest.

(It is taking everything in him.)

“Burn,” he utters. “I’ll burn everything.”

“You’re-…”

“Weaker than you? I know that,” Jungkook interrupts, his lips set in a straight line as he lets himself be swept by the current that is you. “All the more reason to do everything for you then.”

The young prince doesn’t even break his gaze from you once, even if his pupils are trembling and his teeth are chattering out of the sheer trepidation that comes with being scared for someone else who carries your heart with them.

He doesn’t break his gaze from you, even for the briefest second, as he fishes out his (your) handkerchief from his pocket that’s there, not because it just happens to be, but because it’s allotted for you.

To love and to be loved is to feel the sun from both sides, and Jungkook no longer wants the star to swallow him whole because he doesn’t want you to be burned.

Jungkook wants to love you all the way.

[redheadspark]

Bliss

Summary - Druig knows how to bring you bliss

*Got the idea for this one shot from this Gif*

Warnings - SMUT SMUT SMUT! This is 18+, NO MINORS ALLOWED FROM HERE ON OUT!

A/N - I am no SMUT writer by trade, so bear with me :D

You fell back into the bed, your breath barely on your lips as your thighs were trembling and your orgasm was now dwindling to a small simmer.  Sweat itched along your skin, thanks to the solid body on top of you that was holding you close and still buried deep inside of you, watching your body shake from your post orgasm.  His eyes were wide, nearly black with no evidence of the sapphire blue they naturally were, his lisp plump to almost crimson in the moonlight, and his skin with its sheen of sweat along his porcelain skin.  

"That was…..I can't even talk" You tried to say, but your voice was nearly gone with a small smile on your lips as the man above you merely chuckled and ruffled his own brown hair from his eyes.

"Don't say a single word, darlin'." He hummed, leaning back down to have his arms on the mattress below you, digging his forehead against your shoulder as he rolled his hips deeply and slowly.  You mewled, arching into him as you clung onto his shoulders, knowing fully well that he was not done with you.

Neither you were done, not with what you went through.

This was not the first time you two were in bed together, nor would it be the last.  But it felt like your first time, not with the intensity and the lust that was seeping under your skin as you both were gasping for air and pouring your love to one another, but with the intense love you both had for one another for centuries and centuries on end.  

Being together on the Domo for some time as friends before realizing your feelings for one another brought your paths together as lovers, then as a married couple.  You never thought in your wildest dreams that the Mind Controlling Eternal, the very one who was aloof to outsiders and sarcastic by nature, would fall head over heels in love with someone like you. He was wrapped around your heart so naturally and organically that before you knew it, you realized that your heart was taken by him and there was no way to be without him.  

You both went along with the evolution of humans, seeing the good, the bad, and the ugly.  Even within your own family of Eternals and how straining it was getting with one another, you both stayed side by side.  Druig's heart was beyond massive for the sake of the humans, for wishing them peace and tranquility on that small and fragile planet.  So when he decided to walk away after seeing a genocide unfold in front of his eyes, you joined him. How could you stay behind and let the love of your life walk away?  He was part of your soul, half of your heart, and neither one of you wished to be parted. 

"Uggh….Oh fuck Druig," you moaned against his head as his hips were staying consistent, rolling sleep and slow as you felt his cock slide in and out of you.  You were feeling that tension again, the burning in your thigh muscles since your legs were bracketing Druig's hips with ease, your arms shaking while you clung onto his muscular shoulders, and your core finding that flicker of pleasure again while he kissed your skin over and over.  One of his hands moved from under the pillow where you were, bracing your jawline to have your head stay in one spot while he was still fucking you deeply.  You loved when he did this, his actions were both filthy and intimate at the same time.  Holding you close as you fucked, perhaps thinking that you two could blend into one as he made you cum multiple times.  

This was how he loved you: showing you with his actions along with his words how he loved you and would never stop loving you.

You moved your head to kiss his palm that was against your jawline, feeling him thrust again to have you moan silently and feel his thumb trace your lower lip.  Without you thinking about it and merely thinking about the pleasure that was now etched within you, you slide his thumb into your mouth.  He moaned against your neck.

"Fuck," he growled, his thrust never slowing as your hand moved down to grasp at his ass through the thin sheet that was covering it.  He huffed and moved his head to gaze at you with heavy eyes, seeing his thumb in your mouth as you locked eyes with him with a blissed-out face, "You want me to make you cum again, don't ya?"

Releasing his thumb with a pop, you grinned as he gave a particularly hard thrust, you moaned out, "Do it,"

His eyes narrowed: challenged accepted.

Having this kind of love with Druig was nothing short of amazing.  Built on the solid foundation of friendship and devotion, you both could take on the world if you wanted to.  Yet you and Druig didn't wish for that, you both instead settled for your little village in the Amazon.  A slice of paradise amongst the soldiers that followed Druig, underneath the massive trees, and hidden from the rest of the world.  The love that was blossoming over time between you and Druig was now thriving and evolving, spending mornings in bed together and long walks amongst the trees.  Druig never strayed from you, and he proved it again and again.

Druig loved running the village and caring for the families that were growing as the years went by, and you saw the new side of Druig that was hidden for so long because of his inability to step in and help humans.  It made you proud to see him care for his villagers, to see the brightness in his eyes and within his tone, and you wished that would never go away.  

Even after 500 years when your Eternals family came back to find you two to stop the ending of the world with them, nothing seemed to slow the pair of you down.

Moans were filling the room for the pair of you now as Druig was now determined to make you cum again, you letting him as his hips were now snapping and his eyes never leaving your face as you were melting with the sensation.  You felt that drive in his hold along your body, in his whimpers along his lips,  and in his eyes as he was watching you get closer and closer to teetering over the edge.  He knew just how to make you cum: his rough fingers along your body or inside of you, his sweet and yet filthy words in your ear, and even his cock that was perfect in length and girth that seemed to be created to only fit inside of you.  Inwardly, you thanked your lucky stars that you both were Eternals with extended energy, being able to fuck all night without a single need for a break.  

This led to your record: 14 straight hours back in the Amazon when you two went off together on your anniversary back in 1869.

This time, this was more than a simple act of love or fuck session.  The world almost ended, and you all almost lost everything you knew thanks to Arishem and his need to bring Tiamut to life and a new balance to the universe.  Yet you all stopped it, not wishing to let this planet go to waste since you grew to love it over the centuries. It was a relief that there was no more danger for any of you to worry about, and to think that you were so close to losing Druig at the hands of Ikaris, you thought of the worst.  

Seeing him walk up to you with a few cuts and bruises, yet alive and well, you had to hold him close and engrain him in your mind.

He must have felt the same, whisking you away from the rest of your group. Which then brought you to your current predicament.

"I'm close…I'm close Druig…" You moaned against his head as he was not slowing down with his hips and his open-mouth kisses against your jawline.  He hummed, his spare hand moving down to rub his thumb against your clit as he was thrusting deeper and deeper.  You moan hotly from the touch, your legs sprawling out at this point as he keeps the adrenaline going.  

"You don't have to tell me, I can feel ya flutterin' against my cock," he growled as you were feeling that sensation in your toes moving up to be along your spine, "I know your body and what makes ya tick, right?  I know where to touch, where to lick, where to….where to fuck," 

He rubbed your clit hard, making you moan with no abandon as he chuckled to pause and sit up a bit.  He looked down at your body, seeing him undone you were yet at the same time tight wound.  Your hair askew, your breast etched in hickies and exposed for him to savor, even the gorgeous sight of where you two were connected along your hips.  

But what got him was your eyes, the same eyes that he fell for when he first saw you on the Domo.  The same eyes that saw his painful and tear-jerking moments throughout the years but never repeated.  The same eyes that poured love into his own when he felt he was undeserving.  He swore a long time ago when he first kissed you at sunset, he would do anything and everything in his power to keep you in his life.  

Centuries later, he held onto that promise. 

"I love you," He hummed, the tone of lust simmered as you gazed up at him with lust in your own eyes.  You felt that love seep under your skin, even in the heat of fucking you both would find a way to have another layer of intimacy with each other.  Perhaps you were thinking that he was going to die because of Ikaris, or that was world was so close to ending, but you two looked at one another as if nothing else existed in the world, or in that little room.  

You leaned up, moaning as you did since he was involuntarily thrusting in you to make you tremble.  Druig moaned too, though it was silenced by you kissing him softly.  He kissed you back,  feeling that gentleness along your lips as you framed his face in your hands.  Although you knew of it being a distraction, moving one hand to be placed in his chest to give him a push.

Within a second, he was sprawled on his back as you were now riding him.  He grinned as you gently grasped his throat, feeling him gulp as you too locked eyes with that intensity again.

"Love you more," You replied, then giving one hard roll.  Druig moaned loudly as his eyes rolled back in bliss.

The End

tagging - @a-lumos-in-the-nox @heliosphere8 @virtueassassin @pemberlyy @botanicalbarnes @reader6898 @eternalslover

[alottiegoingon]

but i'm a cheerleader

jackie taylor x fem!reader

summary: where reader is a cheerleader and jackie taylor is the football captain

warnings: jackie being too obvious and reader too oblivious, characters are aged up, 90's but no homophobia cause its pride month and bc i can, really cheesy and lots of fluff, not proofread

a year ago, when you made the decision to try out for the cheerleading team, you had no inkling of the repercussions that would follow. you were uncertain if cheerleading was the right thing for you, especially considering the many sexist comments aimed at the girls. yet, it would look quite good on your college application.

neither extremely popular nor a complete loner, you were content with your close-knit group of friends. however, everything shifted once you joined the team. suddenly, you found yourself the center of attention in the hallways, drawing looks of both amusement and envy, a situation you still hadn't fully adjusted to.

one person in particular seemed more entranced by you: jackie taylor. the football team captain constantly had her eyes on you. no matter where you were—be it the cafeteria, by your locker in the morning, or during class—you would eventually see her watching you, prompting you to quickly look away after making eye contact.

thinking it couldn’t get any worse, you were stunned to find jackie gazing at you from the bleachers during cheerleading practice. you nearly caused the entire pyramid of girls to collapse, resulting in numerous angry stares from the others and a lecture from the coach.

you were starting to suspect that there was something wrong with your face!

⚽︎

"this is getting really weird, i swear, tai," you blurt out as soon as you sit down beside your friend at lunch. after setting your tray on the table, you take a sip of orange juice and tune into your friends' discussion.

"you're overthinking it," your friend, van, steps in, swiping an apple from your tray, "it's jackie. she's harmless."

"right! except every time i look at her, she's staring right back at me. maybe she just hates me," you reply, trying to retrieve your apple but getting a slap on your hand instead.

"hate you?" lottie scoffs, "she's like butt-crazy for you. i bet she writes your name with hearts all around it. no wonder she's terrible at french."

that was an actual good argument. jackie was really bad and hearing her attemps of speaking french was torture. still, it would make absolute zero sense. jackie taylor was popular, stunning and smart and the fact that she was the captain only added to that. she was probably memorizing your flaws to make fun of you with her friends.

⚽︎

seeing your coach step onto the field with coach martinez, the one in charge of your friend’s, and jackie’s, football team, made your heart sink. you’d experienced this before, back when the schedule became so tight that they had to combine cheerleaders and jocks.

a really, really, really bad idea.

the field was huge, yet it still felt too small to avoid jackie’s piercing glare. the worst part wasn’t your constant stumbling and tripping over your own feet and the others', but the relentless urge to look back at her.

from the other side of the field, the girls’ taunts directed at jackie reached your ears, and you knew it was because of you. you weren't the only one to notice her stares.

“careful not to slip, jackie,” van teased, their breathy and tired voice not hindering them from poking fun while playing on opposite teams for practice. she chased jackie, trying to swipe the ball while gesturing to the ground.

“what? where?” jackie stopped and looked down, not wanting to slip in front of you, giving van just enough time to snatch the ball.

“on your own drool,” their joke made the entire team laugh, and even from a distance, you could see jackie’s face turn red, speechless.

what a dweeb, you thought, even if you were also smiling at the oddly funny moment moment.

⚽︎

despite all the teasing and awkward moments, you couldn't deny that jackie's constant attention was doing a number on your nerves. you couldn't decide if you liked it or not, if she hated you or not, if you should confront her or not. one way or another, she wasn't discreet at all.

in the very next saturday, your phone rang with tai's voice, inviting to a party. you hesitated for a moment, maybe a party was just what you needed to get your mind off things but, at the same time, it would be too naive of you to imagine that the thing you were fighting to avoid wasn't going to be in there as well

as you arrived at the place, you noticed the usual crowd already mingling. music blared, voices echoed, and the familiar scent of pizza, soda and alcohol filled the air. a very weird mix, you'd say.

you tried to relax, but your eyes instinctively scanned the room, searching for jackie. it didn't take long to find her. she was in the corner with a group of friends, a jacket draped over her shoulder and a pretty dress catching your eye. but you didn't want to cross her way, at least not now.

"someone's looking at you," lottie's voice linger in your ears, scaring you away from all the jackie taylor's thoughts inside your head.

"hi, lot," you ignore her words, not daring to look in the opposite direction, "i don't know what you're talking about."

"oh, come on, don't be so boring. jackie’s been staring at you all night."

you rolled your eyes, trying to focus on your drink and the conversation around you, but the weight of jackie's gaze was impossible to ignore. you stole a glance in her direction, only to find her quickly looking away, her cheeks tinged with a faint blush.

"seriously, what's her deal?" you muttered, more to yourself than anyone else.

lottie chuckles, "she likes you, duh. everyone knows it except you."

before you could respond, your other friends joined your little circle, a mischievous glint in their eyes. "so, are you finally going to talk to her or just keep pretending you don’t notice her staring?"

you sighed, feeling cornered. "I don't know. what if she hates me?"

"you are so complicated," tai groans, arm resting over van's shoulder, "just go find out!"

with a deep breath, you decided to take their advice. you just had to be confident.

instead of walking straight to jackie, you made your way over to the drinks table, trying to appear casual. she was close by and you figured grabbing a drink might be a discreet way to approach her. if it was too awkward, another word for 'if you were too much of a coward, you could just back off.

as you reached for a cup, your hands shook slightly. not only you had accidentally knocked over a few cups but also spilled soda all over the counter and the floor. the noise drew everyone's attention, including hers.

great, you thought, just what you needed.

before you could react, jackie stepped in, grabbing some napkins to help you clean up. her proximity made your heart race even more.

"you okay?" she asked, her voice gentle and concerned, wiping the counter around you. at least she wasn't judging you.

"yeah, thanks," you mumbled, feeling your cheeks burn. you could barely talk or breath at that moment, too stunned it even took you an extra second to help her clean up your mess.

noticing your jitter, as you both cleaned up, jackie glanced at you. "this party's pretty wild, huh?"

you offer her a nervous grin as she hands you a clean cup. "right, i guess people really like the weekends."

"absolutely. and they're probably too stressed with ms. jamison class. four pages in a day? that woman crazy," jackie's gaze softened as she glanced at you, attempting to ease the tension between you.

"what about her hair? she looks like she's stuck in the 70's," you added, feeling a peculiar flutter in your stomach as a tender giggle escaped from her lips.

the two of you stood there, the awkwardness lingering in the air like a heavy fog as the sound of your laughter slowly faded into silence.

"i gotta say, though, this wasn't what i had in mind when i decided to come here tonight," you admit, reaching a hand to grab a drink, being much more careful this time.

she looked up, her eyes locking onto yours. "and what was your plan?"

you hesitated for a moment, then blurted out,"honestly? trying to dodge you and those pretty eyes of yours that seem to follow me everywhere."

a look of surprise flashed across jackie's face, her eyebrows shooting up and her eyes widening briefly before she couldn't hold back a snicker.

"it's not funny, jackie," you interrupted her giggle,"why do you keep staring at me all the time? do you hate me or what?"

as your confusion amused her further, her grin widened. could she be any more obvious? "hate you? no, not at all. It's the opposite, actually."

you frowned, puzzled. "what do you mean?"

drawing nearer, jackie's gaze held an earnestness that sent a flutter through your chest. "i like you. a lot," you stole a glance downwards, observing her fingers twisting nervously. she seemed as jittery as you now. "i just didn't know how to tell you. and I guess I was too scared to find out if you felt the same."

her confession left you at a loss for words for a moment, this wasn't something you had prepared for. "so, you... like me?"

jackie nodded, a shy smile tugging at her lips. "yeah, i do. i thought i was being clear about that."

it all fell into place in an instant—the lingering looks, the nervousness, the way she seemed to be everywhere you were. feeling a warmth spread through you, you couldn't help but smile back. "i gotta say, that explains a lot."

jackie's laughter echoed softly, easing the tension in the room. "sorry, i just didn't know how to handle it."

you paused for a moment, gathering your thoughts. confident enough, you spoke up, "maybe we can figure it out together."

jackie's eyes lit up with enthusiasm. "i'd really like that."

[ondeemand]

Transformers One Review

For the sake of convenience, I’ll be referring to the characters as their new names (Optimus Prime, Megatron, Bumblebee) instead of their old ones (Orion Pax, D-16, B-127).

Also, I didn’t grow up with Transformers, so this will be mostly from an outsider’s perspective. I can’t tell what possibly was or wasn’t a retcon or how accurate to the source material it was, but I think the background info on their world held up very well and they were able to explain it clearly to new viewers like me. It definitely would have hit harder if I grew up with Transformers and knew more than just facts from cultural osmosis, but I still enjoyed the movie a lot.

Notes/Things I’m Neutral On

Very weird to hear my name (Dee) being said throughout most of the movie by Chris Hemsworth’s bad American accent.

Also, I forgot that Megatron has transformed into ground vehicles before. I only ever knew him to turn into a jet, so I was kind of confused that he was a tank in this movie. I hope we get to see him get upgraded to a jet in the next one, but the tank is still cool.

Pros/Things I Liked

Simple but effective color theory with their eye colors. Main good guys have blue while Megatron has yellow, sitting between good and bad. Still a friendly color at first, but slowly turns closer to orange and then fully red as his anger and hatred consume him (and after he met the red-eyed Starscream, a cowardly man who ends up enabling Megatron‘s more violent/aggressive tendencies)

○ Also I don’t know if I was just seeing things, but it looked like Megatron’s eyes got more yellow whenever he looked at Optimus which is so sad and so gay.

I really thought they were gonna push a romance between Elita and either Bumblebee (goofy manchild x competent woman trope) or Optimus (male lead x female lead, blue x pink), but I was pleasantly surprised that they didn’t. Sadly, there’s still time for it in future installments, but I can dream.

Not to be gay, but spider woman sexy. Airachnid was so obviously evil that it was funny, but I can’t fault Sentinel for having her around because I, too, would want a deadly goth woman to be my right-hand lady. They felt like the evil, less developed versions of Mustang and Hawkeye. I am in love.

The animation is gorgeousssss. The environments, the character designs, the fight choreography, the transformations, the lighting, the texture, mwah mwah MWAH STUNNING!!!

○ Sorry, I’m never gonna stop talking about this. The way they were able to make square/blocky figures move so fluidly was fantastic (and proof of concept that a fully animated Minecraft movie would have worked). ○ The camera angles were also great for framing both the dramatic, intense, and/or high-action moments like fights or chase scenes, while also adding a lot to the comedic moments. Like when the camera stays tracking Optimus’ face when running through the forest, only for him to suddenly fall down a cliff neither he nor us saw coming, only to then zoom out to the perspective of the guards below, showing them stumbling and falling. ○ The contrast between the mechanical and organic elements on the surface were really cool, and the way it was introduced was able to convey this idea that organic life was this strange, alien thing. ○ The way the surface just rebuilds itself into these jagged, blocky terrains was really unique and interesting! It felt like a glitched computer model because of its rougher shapes which really added to the fear and hostility of the surface.

90% of their jokes landed and they landed hard. The bit where Optimus looks like he’s about to transform and then just fucking books it is incredible. The audio and camera work help add to these as well, like the music building as Optimus pretends to transform, the camera zooming in close to different parts of him, only for all background noise to cut out as it shows Optimus running away. I won’t name every joke and quip I found funny or we’d be here all day, but they’re certainly a highlight of the movie.

I love Keegan-Michael Key, but I wasn’t a fan of him as the comic relief character of Toad in the Mario movie. When Bumblebee showed up I got a little nervous, but I really loved his performance of the character.

I really liked the midpoint pep talk about hope. That’s a really nice reason that Optimus is the leader despite not being as skilled as other people. He has the hope for a better future and it was a core part of his character from the beginning, and I really like the idea that a leader is someone who can envision a brighter future no matter what.

Alpha Trion transforming was SICK AS FUCK!!! I love that he was more animalistic when the rest of the cast become vehicles. His final fight was so cool, and it actually made me kind of emotional to see him at the end with the rest of the Prime ghosts.

The stabbings? The beheadings?? The branding??? The way Megatron tore Sentinel in half and then ripped his heart out on-screen holy shit???? This movie was incredibly brutal and I loved it. It’s such an interesting phenomenon that children’s media is allowed to be about as graphic as they want as long as it’s against robots, even incredibly sentient ones like in the Transformers series.

○ I watched the 1986 Transformers movie for a class earlier this year, and while it also had a lot of brutality in it’s fights, the new movie felt more intense. Part of this could be attributed to me watching the 2024 movie on a big screen vs the 1986 movie in my living room, but there are other reasons as well. The 1986 movie had more upbeat songs playing over the fights, specifically songs like The Touch and Dare, which helped keep the tone lighter and more exciting. The 2024 movie didn’t have anything like that, allowing the action, while still cool and exciting, to take on a more serious tone. This is also emphasized by the graphics of the movie being 3D instead of 2D. While the 2D 1986 movie is a stunning masterpiece, people still view it with the idea in mind that, since it’s a cartoon, the stakes and story will be less intense. The 2024 movie being 3D with very detailed graphics and lighting already has more visual intensity. The characters are still these bright, poppy colors, but they can come across more moody and dark due to the environments, lighting, and textures that the 3D medium more easily allows. And while the painted backgrounds and cell shading of the old movie are great, the CGI backgrounds are a lot closer to realism, so the harsher elements like metal and rock, which make up a vast majority of the environment and characters, look real too.

The way Megatron’s hate consumed him to the point where he started acting more villainous and, while not entirely similar to Sentinel, still ended up hurting innocent people was tragic. Trying to push away and deny everything about a person only to wind up being just like them. This was perfectly shown in the end credit scene where Megatron is branding himself and the new Decepticons with Megatronus Prime’s face. To him, it may be him reclaiming the traumatic experience and literally using it like a badge of honor, as well as thinking he’s honoring Megatronus Prime. But in reality, he’s just inflicting the same trauma done to him onto others, just like Sentinel. Such a cool way to show how every villain is the hero of their own story.

The doomed yaoiiiiii I’m never gonna get over them. The only other Transformers media I’ve consumed is the 1986 movie, which kills off Optimus Prime in the first 25 minutes and Megatron becomes Galvatron, so I never knew the depths of their homoerotic relationship.

I’m a sucker for “the hero and villain used the be friends (and maybe even lovers?)” trope, so Optimus and Megatron’s relationship and the general premise of the movie was already a slam dunk for me.

I’m also a fan of legacy stories like Avatar and She-Ra. While this movie didn’t get as in-depth with the concept, I enjoyed that they played with the idea of legacy and taking up the mantle of the former Primes.

I absolutely loved the end message that Optimus gives us. Hope, freedom, and autonomy are incredibly important things to learn, and as a trans person who very much wants to keep control over what I do with my body, I really resonated with that last one. I think it’s really cool that they included a message like that in this children’s movie about robots that turn into cars.

Regarding the message of autonomy, I love that it gives the term Autobots a new meaning. Auto meaning “automobile”, since they transform into cars, and Auto meaning “self”, as they are now fully their own bots with control over themselves.

Cons/Things I Disliked

Mid vocal performances from everyone except Brian Tyree Henry and Keegan-Michael Key. And as I mentioned before, it was hard not to focus on Chris’ attempts at an American accent, not to mention how recognizable his, as well as Scarlett Johansson’s, voices are.

The plot felt a little disjointed in the first 1/3-ish.

○ Good setup with the main characters being an oppressed working class with one dreaming of better things and the other hesitant to fall out of line or take risks. But then suddenly there’s a race, and then they’re in it, and then they lose, and then their leader wants to promote them. At first it feels like there are hints that he’s a scummy celebrity-type and that meeting their hero is what will spur on the disillusionment with their society. But then some random douchebag that doesn’t like them reassigns them which goes against their leader’s command, and that’s how the plot kicks off? ○ Also, Elita’s involvement felt kind of rushed/hand-waved. They all get stuck on the surface, but instead of trying to make her way back to report them like she was saying she would for the past few minutes, she makes a complete 180 and heads the expedition herself. ○ It all just felt a little strange, but once it got going the rest of the plot felt fine.

Megatron’s descent into “evil” felt kind of rushed. I understand that he feels betrayed and I really love where the character ends up by the end, but it felt like a real 180 without a lot of build up.

Some jokes fell flat or felt annoying and kinda cringe. That’s the territory of children’s movies though, so par for the course.

TLDR

Overall, this movie was a really fun watch and I’d love to go see it again. While some parts fall a little flat, the movie is lifted from mediocrity by its many Pros. From the stunning visuals, to the quick humor, to the tragic origins of two friends driven apart by their ideals, I’d recommend this movie to anyone interested in animation or the Transformers brand.

8.82/10

[hminnj]

Have My Heart

gojo satoru/reader

cw: fluff, angst that isnt angst, comfort, gojo satoru is his own warning, not fully proofread or edited, short maybe bad writing, more experimental than anything

an: wrote this with have my heart by maverick city in mind (its christian music, just in case you decide to look at it), no religious themes in the fic tho dw

-

Satoru loves with no reservation.

It's clear in the way that he answers to your beck and call- his whole body attentive to every word and every movement of your lips. He doesn't look away once, carefully observing and picking out the gems of information you give him about yourself- about your day, what you like, your family. He treasures them like a historian's sacred relics, cataloging everything properly so nothing is forgotten, and making sure they're kept clean, as neat and tidy as can be. It's something he's always done, and you see it with Suguru and Shoko as well, it's sweet of him to do so.

.

Satoru loves with no reservation.

You're late one day, it's raining, and you promised Satoru you'd meet up with him early today. You're expect some sort of whining or complaint from him, some sort of pettiness. But he doesn't do anything but grin when you're finally there. Offering up a greeting and then turning, expecting you to follow him. An apology starts to come out but he stops you before you can get any further. Giving you a smile and telling you its alright, that he'll forgive you, and he always will. You don't believe him that day, but now the countless times he's given you grace proves it to be true.

.

Satoru loves with no reservation.

He doesn't ask or expect perfection in anyone. (except himself but in his defense he's already perfect. You, Suguru, and Shoko argue otherwise, however you all agreed the infinity keeps anything from getting into his head). Satoru sees you for the first time that day, you've come back from a visit to your family not long ago. Sitting outside quietly, letting the breeze blow over your features, but everything feels so stagnant. He approaches with light steps, placing himself gently on the bench, and he stays quiet.

His presence is comforting, its peaceful, and you think he'll ruin it when he opens his mouth in about three seconds, likely teasing you about the look on your face and how exhausted you are, but he doesn't. It feels like a breath of fresh wind, blowing away your countless thoughts. You don't know how he does it, but it's nice.

.

Satoru loves with no reservation.

Tokyo Metropolitan Curse Technical College is quiet today. The loud one enabler (Suguru) is out on a mission and as are you, which leaves Satoru and Shoko. Shoko doesn't provide him enough entertainment, and neither you nor Suguru text him throughout the day, which leaves Satoru with two options; bother Yaga or simmer in his glorious thoughts and ideas, he chooses the latter.

You arrive back to your dorm late into the night fully prepared to crash but lo and behold, your bathroom light is on, there's more bags than you can count on your desk of what you think is mostly food, and Satoru has his left foot in the sink under the running water.

You ignore him for your sanity, skimming through the bags to find not just food but surprisingly a few pieces of jewelry and other miscellaneous items. Satoru recieves a raised eyebrow when he comes out of the bathroom with a water trail behind him (a slug, you think), shrugging in response with an "I missed you" that just free-falls from his lips and then immediately going through the bags to show what he bought for you. His behavior is akin to a cat bringing back its finest catch to proudly show their owner. You don't think you'll ever get used to this.

.

Satoru loves with no reservation.

You're talking with Shoko in the classroom about something that Suguru did the other day; a small mess up, which is strange for the black-haired male, but makes for a good conversation nevertheless. Your phone buzzes and theres a reminder you accidently snoozed earlier about your non-sorcerer friends performance, you apologize to Shoko and dash out in a hurry, calculating how late you might be until Satoru stops you right at the door of the building, a questioning look on his face.

After you explain he immediately offers to take (teleport) you but your refusal comes with the fact that you wont have a way back. So he says he'll stay the entire time and leaves you no room for arguing as he hugs you tightly and you're suddenly at the concert hall. The white haired teen smiles at you, getting you back home safely after the few hours the performance is and the extra time you spent with your friend even though you know he has work to do.

.

Satoru loves with no reservation.

Affection practically spills from him, you think he's overflowing with enough of it to fill more than two Earths full. Even in his banter with any of your fellow students it escapes, and especially Suguru. They yell at each other but from Satoru's end you can see the fondness seeping through his words and actions.

You can tell in his sleep as well, unguarded, comfortable, and digging into your side; attempting to mold his body to yours as a movie runs in the background. Suguru is usually the victim for Satoru's "cuddles", but he sits at the table, pleased with the lack of the roach this movie night. From the other side of the couch, Shoko looks over ever so often amusedly to see you get more and more entangled with the six foot being, and she can only offer her "condolences". Eventually you find a somewhat comfy position and play with his limbs and hair, unable to do anything else being physically restricted. It's cute how he subconsciously leans in to your touch.

.

Satoru loves with reservation once.

Its only been two days since then but it feels like an eternity, and the sunlight blaring down on the school isn't helping anyone. You've never seen Satoru like this, silent with a permanent frown, and maybe this is the only time you can say there's something that shines brighter than he does.

It doesn't take you long to follow your feet that lead you to Shoko; she's doing paperwork, and you know she's only doing it to distract herself. That's why you're here after all.

The buzz of the infirmary and the shuffling of papers fills your ears. It's like that for a few minutes until she speaks up.

"You should go talk to him." Of course that's what she says.

"I thought he wasn't willing to converse with anyone." Talking about Satoru doesn't help with the hoarseness of your throat, it just makes you think even harder.

"He isn't but you're... you know." You turn to her confused, and she gives you a look. She's probably messing with you, but she seems so sure of something.

You cave eventually. It takes a lot out of you to stand up, but you do, dragging your feet and your heart in the direction of a dimming sun.

Satoru's on the same bench when you find him, and just like last time it's a breezy, sunny day. You copy his actions, walking over, gently setting yourself down, and quietly observing. He looks so tired. But you don't say it, you know he wouldn't either.

It hurts to look at Satoru in this state. He's less than half a meter away but it feels like there's an infinite distance between the two of you.

He's quiet, too quiet.

It's strange, but you can't think or bring yourself to say anything to fill in the gaps he's left.

Instead, your body moves on its own, shifting closer and gently taking his glasses off, not making eye contact because you know it's the last thing he wants. Then you pull him close and cradle him tightly, he doesn't object. His body lays against yours limply like he's dead weight, and Satoru feels like he should be dead right now. He doesn't hug back, you don't expect him to.

The only thing you do is stay with him like this, until the second-brightest star in your life begins to fade.

.

Satoru loves with no reservation.

He's given you his entire heart and being by now and still attempts to give you more even if after his being there isn't much left to give. The students see it more than ever, with how their sensei brightens (more than he already is) when you show up, words of endearment flowing out of his mouth so easily (his current favorite is wifey), and the overbearing physical affection that you'd have to be blind and deaf to miss.

It's maybe your favorite thing about him, said male would say otherwise, but a sweet smile can't help but reach your face when he talks about his students' daily meanderings to you. Treating them like close family, with the same type of love he's shown you.

-

thank you if you read <3, likes, reblogs, and comments are greatly appreciated

gojo is hard to write for ngl ughh

[correlance]

Remember that one fan theory I wrote about Alastor having a rivalry with Thomas Edison in the 1920s? Well, I decided to do a bit more research; it turns out that, not only was I right, but Edison really hated radio. He loathed it so much that he wrote not one, but several articles railing against the "radio fad" in 1926, to the point where an anonymous person wrote "letters to the editor" to argue with Edison.

Gee, I wonder who it could be doing that in the Hazbin-verse? /s

GIF and art originally by karumkin on Twitter/X (2019).

There was also a slew of increasingly aggressive telegrams sent back-and-forth between Edison and radio proponents, with Edison penning thinly-veiled insults that offended even mild critics of the "Wizard":

"The radio is a commercial failure, and its popularity with the public is waning. Radio is impractical commercially, and ethically distorted, and is is losing its grip rapidly in the market and in the home. There is not 10% of the interest in the radio that there was last year.

Radio is a highly-complicated machine in the hands of people who know nothing about it. No dealers have made any money out of it. It is not a commercial machine, because it is too complicated. Reports from 4,000 Edison dealers who have handled radio sets show that they are rapidly abandoning it; and, as for its music, it is awful.

I don't see how they can listen to it. Thousands of people have signed a petition asking that sopranos be kept off the air. Of course, most of them don't know that the soprano voice distorts the radio. The phonograph is coming into its own because people want good music. The fact is that the radio never had a high peak of popularity.

In towns where 25 or 30 dealers were handling radio sets, only one or two are now handling them. A farmer 5 miles from town buys a radio, perhaps on the installment plan. A wire becomes loose. The dealer has to arrange to fix it. This happens time and time again. The business becomes unprofitable for the dealer to engage in. He does not make any money out of it. None of them has. They are giving it up as fast as they can. It is not a commercially successful machine, because it is too complicated.

Static is awful, and the difficulties of tuning out--and now, they're stealing each other's wavelengths! It is too bad that the radio has to be too complicated. It was a big and interesting thing, and the people responded to it, but they want good music, and they found it is not to be had on the radio. That is why the phonograph is reclaiming its own."

Quote from "Edison and Radio", Radio News, December 1926, "in which the Editor takes issue with Mr. Edison's claim that radio is a failure; yet it is pointed out that the radio industry owes Edison a great debt; wherein facts are figures are given to show that radio is on a steady increase; granting that neither radio, nor the phonograph, is yet perfect; how the interest in radio is steadily increasing, and radio dealers are now making good money":

"Since the publication of the famous interview with Mr. Edison, the press, and particularly the radio press across the entire country, has been more or less agitated...I do believe that Mr. Edison has not been recently in-touch with radio sufficiently to appreciate fully the tremendous advances that have been made. Mr. Edison is a busy man, and a tremendously busy inventor. It would be well-nigh impossible for him to be in-touch with all of the various commercial phases of radio all over the country; and, like other executives, he obtains his reports from his subordinates, and such reports often as not may be highly colorful, and even wrong...[thus, the radio industry is unwilling to accord Mr. Edison anything]...as to Mr. Edison's remarks, the statements that follow are facts, which can be checked up by anyone who is unbiased."

Imagine Alastor and Vox with "Stayed Gone" in Episode 2, and Alastor and Lucifer with "Hell's Greatest Dad" in Episode 5, but happening entirely over letters and telegrams, because mass media and television didn't exist yet. The closest musical numbers would likely be "Farmer Refuted" and "Your Obedient Servant" from Hamilton.

Per the book The Wizard of Menlo Park: How Thomas Alva Edison Invented the Modern World by Randall E. Stross:

Page 276: "[Edison's] phonograph business faced a challenge in the 1920s unlike any that had come before: the advent of commercial radio stations, and the wide availability of free music broadcasts and other entertainment. By the end of 1921, an estimated 1 million listeners had access to radios, and listened to programs broadcast from the Eastern seaboard. A single station in Roselle, New Jersey, which offered the voices of operatic stars among its musical programs, had a broadcast range of a thousand miles, covering New England and the mid-Atlantic states, and reaching as far west as Missouri. A contemporary newspaper account explained to readers not yet acquainted with the phenomenon that those who owned radio sets could enjoy entertainment that was 'literally as free as the air'. Charles and Theodore Edison [proposed a combination phonograph-radio]...their father need not feel slighted because the vacuum tube, a key component of the radio set, was a modern descendant of Edison's experimental work on the incandescent lightbulb. Edison did feel slighted, however; such, at least, was the opinion of Thomas Cowan, a former Westinghouse employee...[who conducted experiments in radio broadcasts with the aid of a phonograph Edison was willing to loan him in 1921]. Cowan had several conversations about radio with Edison, who became upset and recalled the loaner when he heard the Westinghouse broadcasts...[Edison's sons were embarrassed, humiliated]."

"Edison calls radio a 'failure for music', thinks phonograph will regain its own": The New York Times, 23 September 1926. Underlining the usefulness of radio for purposes other than musical programs, Edison did tune in to a radio broadcast of the Dempsey-Tunney fight in 1926, which he was too deaf to hear. He had to rely on family members [usually his wife, Mina] to summarize what had transpired at the end of each round.

"Radio satisfactory on bout, Edison says": The New York Times, 24 September 1926. Defending the quality of musical broadcasts, the radio industry offered expert testimony to rebut Edison's claims [in the next week's newspaper]. See: "Broadcasters disagree with electrical wizard", The New York Times, 3 October 1926.

The "radio fad": A few months later, [after much outcry from the radio industry], Edison was willing to grant that radio might not disappear, but he had a new criticism: listeners' aesthetic sense would be damaged. "Undistorted music, in time, will sound strange to those brought up on radio music," he predicted, "and they will not like the real thing." See: "Thomas A. Edison sees a menace for music in the radio", Musician, January 1927.

"Edison's fears [about the Edison Company not succeeding in the radio business] were realized, though it had been Edison's intransigence (refusal to change one's views) that put the company at such a great disadvantage as a late entrant...on 9 October 1929, Charles Edison prepared a report for his father that showed a loss of $1.3 million due to start-up costs for the [Edison] radio...he could not know that, two weeks later, the stock sell-off would begin with Black Thursday, on 24 October, followed by Black Monday and Black Tuesday...a few days later, Thomas A. Edison, Inc., announced that it would cease producing [music] records [altogether], and refit the factory for the production of radios. The announcement was accompanied by a mention of regret, as the phonograph was 'one of Mr. Edison's favorite inventions'."

"An employee reported observing Harvey Firestone tearfully explaining to Edison that the collapse of business due to the stock market crash of 1929, and the Great Depression, meant that he could no longer continue to financially support Edison's laboratory. Edison was heard, sneering, 'He's a Goddamned lightweight.'" ("I saw your fiasco on the picture show, and I just couldn't resist. What a performance! Why, I haven't been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929, hahaha! ...so many orphans.")

Edison's death at the age of 84 on 18 October 1931 was also, ironically, commemorated through radio broadcasts: "[The next] night, two radio networks, the National Broadcasting Company (NBC) and the Columbia Broadcasting Company (CBC), jointly broadcast an 8-minute tribute that ended on the hour, when listeners were asked to turn out the lights. The White House did so, and much of the nation followed, more or less together, some a minute before the hour, others on the hour. On Broadway, 75% of the electrified signs were turned off briefly. Movie theaters went dark for a moment. Everything seemed connected to Edison: the indoor lights, the traffic lights, the electric advertising, everyone connected via radio, which Edison now received credit for helping to 'perfect'. In the simple narrative that provided inspiration for posterity, one man had done it all..."

Some numbers provided for how much radio was making:

1922: $46.5 million (~$860 million in 2024)

1923: $120 million (~$2.2 billion in 2024) (156% increase)

1924: $350 million (~$6.3 billion in 2024) (186% increase)

1925: $449 million (~$8 billion in 2024) (27% increase)

1926: $520 million (~$9.1 billion in 2024) (14% increase)

Overall, per another source:

1922: $60 million (a little more than the previous statistic)

1929: $842.6 million

From here, we can tell the biggest gain was in 1923-1924. Per another source: "Total cost was about $120.00 to buy a new radio in 1926; in today's money, that is about $1,500 to own a radio." That would mean that 7.6 million radios were sold by 1926; an impressive feat, considering that the United States only had a population of a little over 117 million people at the time.

Percentages of United States households with radios:

1925: 19% (5 million households)

1929: 35-40% (200% increase)

1930: 12 million households

1939: 28 million households

The number of licensed broadcast stations surged from just 5 in 1921 to 500 by 1924, per yet another source. In the early years, household radio ownership was highest in the Northeast and on the West Coast. In large sections of the South, Midwest and Great Plains, stations and radio sets were scarce. However, there were notable exceptions.

There were 732 radio stations total across the country by 1927, and the average radio was on 2 hours and 25 minutes per day. People who couldn't afford radios purchased them on installment loans, through which the full price of a new radio could be paid over time. Radios had even more advertisements for washers, dryers, and refrigerators, causing people to use even more merchant credit and installment loans to purchase these shiny, new technological devices.

However, radio sales also took a hit with the Great Depression, as average income levels fell from $3,270 per year in 1920 ($53,300 in 2024), to $2,300 per year by 1929 ($41,500 in 2024), then to $1,500 per year by 1932 ($35,500 in 2024). However, buying a radio also became cheaper, dropping from a costly $200 ($3,200 in 2024) in the early 1920s, to just $35 ($630 in 2024) by 1929-1930.

By the time Alastor died in 1933, 3.6 million radio sets were sold that year alone. By the mid-1930s, 67% of American households had radio sets, and by 1939, about 80% of Americans—over 100 million people—owned radios. Radios were in almost every house, and some Americans even had radios in their cars. The Golden Age of Radio lasted from the 1930s to the 1940s, before being eclipsed by television in the 1950s. Radio hosts went from being paid $10 per broadcast in 1921 ($180-200, 1-2 hours per night, 3-4 nights a week, for a weekly salary of $720-800; monthly salary, $2,900-$3,200; annual salary, $34,800-$38,400; modern-day annual salary range for a radio show host is $30,000-100,000, depending) to making triple-figure salaries in the later 1930s.

Another source lists the following salary ranges for radio hosts:

$2,500-2,700 a year to be an announcer in 1927* (~$45,000-$48,000 range in 2024)

$2,400 a year to be a dramatic director (~$43,000 in 2024)

$4,000 a year to be a program director (~$72,000 in 2024)

New Orleans' first radio broadcast was on 31 March 1922, with WWL. The station wasn't started as a commercial one; but rather, "more of an experiment, started as an interest in wireless communication picked up nationally". The station did not go commercial until 1929, meaning that Alastor also probably had at least one other side job.

Also see:

"Early Radio Announcers Invented Their Profession in the 1920s"

"The History of the Radio Industry in the United States to 1940"

"'A Godlike Presence': The Impact of Radio on the 1920s and 1930s" by Tom Lewis

American Babel: Rogue Radio Broadcasters of the Jazz Age by Clifford John Doerksen (see excerpt here)

Race and Radio: Pioneering Black Broadcasters in New Orleans by Bala James Baptiste (Note: The earliest Black broadcast in New Orleans was in 1945, meaning Alastor was white-passing.)

"Golden Age of Black Radio - Part 1: The Early Years" (Note: The first Black radio announcer, Jack L. Cooper, hosted in 1929.)

"How African Americans Entered Mainstream Radio" by Bala James Baptiste, the author of Race and Radio: Pioneering...

[m1ssunderstanding]

If Paul can't be who he is, or talk to people, keeping it in him who's to blame for this. If he has problems he doesn"t talk about or we older fans see him the way we do, whom is he hiding from? Is it really fare to blame his fans for thinking like he's happy and got it together. Do the younger generation see things differently? I care and adore Paul and don't want to think he isn't. Is that it? Or do we need to feel he's lying and all pr I know pretty much everything public about Paul. I dont mean to be rude or disagree with you. I enjoy seeing new fans and sees him from your pov but I wanna know what you think what he feels he can't share.

Hi! Okay, let's break this down.

Question one: Who is to blame for Paul not being more open about his private life?

Jim McCartney. Next question. No, it's a lot more complicated than that. Besides it being just a natural part of his personality, the foundation of this trait was formed through the whole context of his upbringing which laid the groundwork for how Paul would react to fame, as opposed to the other three. Then, because he was already set up to do so, fame and its side-affects and consequences made Paul double down on closing up. Then during the breakup, John's diarrhea of the mouth syndrome and Linda's encouraging Paul to lean into his home life and let his public life be, put Paul further into a pattern of craving privacy.

Question two: Is it fair to blame older fans for taking Paul's public self as his private self?

Firstly, I don't see the point in talking about blame in the first place. A) being a private person, putting on a face in public, is neither bad nor uncommon. (Maybe nobody really does it to the degree Paul does it. Maybe it does have some negative outcomes and does point to a lack of self-assurance and a strong tendency to emotional avoidance) but to some degree, Paul's cagey and fake public self is normal and healthy. B) blame is the least interesting mystery here.

Secondly, no one is trying to blame older fans for Paul's behavior. What I personally am frustrated with is what such a large group of people taking the surface as the entire ocean does to Paul's character as a historical figure and to the Beatles narrative as a whole. However, this large group is certainly not limited to older fans, nor does it contain all the older fans. Additionally, people can do, think, and say what they want. It's not some pressing humanitarian concern if people misunderstand Paul McCartney and the Beatles. It does seem to indicate and contribute to a large-scale cultural deficiency which may negatively impact more important social issues, but it is certainly far from a life and death situation.

Question three: Does the younger generation see things differently?

I'd actually never thought of these views in terms of generations, but yes, I guess many younger fans do look beyond the surface more than many older fans do.

Question four: Do we need to assume Paul is lying and all PR?

Again. Nobody needs to do anything. Do what you want. But. If you are looking to gain a more serious understanding of one of the most influential people of the twentieth century, then I suggest you don't take every word from his mouth as one-hundred-percent truthful as you should with anyone. This is absolutely not to say Paul is a liar and only cares about looking good to the public for business reasons. In fact, I believe if he was completely open about a lot of the things he guards against fully sharing, he would come off a lot better.

My personal rules of thumb with the Beatles are these: 1. John (and to a lesser extent George) often speaks from a place of strong emotion and uses talking about his experiences and feelings to regulate and soothe. Therefore, his statements are often extreme and often emphasize the negative. Paul (and to a lesser extent Ringo) cannot express strong emotion and fears talking about his experiences and feelings without disguising them or softening them. Therefore, his statements are often evasive and often emphasize the positive. If John says "I was going through murder," he means, "my mental health struggles were particularly difficult at that time even with all the good things I had going for me." If Paul says, "but it wasn't all, you know, great," he means, "Despite what I've made it seem like, that period of my life was not even safe, let alone perfect." 2. Take into account the culture these men were raised in and the attitude that culture would've pushed on them about certain topics. None of them are going to be particularly open about anything they would've been in any way punished for during the bulk of their life experience.

Question five: What do you think Paul feels he can't share?

If you were internationally famous, would you share absolutely everything about your personal life, innermost thoughts, politics, desires, regrets, hurts, and loves? I don't think so. Now, imagine you had most of your ability to be emotionally vulnerable beaten out of you as a child, you and your three best friends experienced death threats and permanent career damage due to one seemingly innocuous comment, and the person you trusted most in the world turned on a dime and exploited all your insecurities and the entire world followed suit for decades. I imagine there would be galaxies filled with all the things you feel you can't share and that you would use whatever protective measures necessary to keep yourself sane.

[myfandomrealitea]

ok I’ll be honest, I was one of the people who approached your safe space post with the mindset “yeah, but…” like, I now whole-heartedly agree that there should absolutely be fandom spaces devoid of real world issues. We all need our spaces to rest and relax. I think I just felt weird about your post because previously ive been in fandom spaces which did operate on the (perfectly fine) rule of ‘no politics’…but ‘politics’ would also include talking about a gay ship or any queer headcannons.

That obviously wasn’t fair to you because you obviously didn’t mean that w/ your post, but I can personally see as to why some people would feel that way if they were in similar fandom spaces. I do still want to reiterate I do agree with your post and I think some of the rebloggers took it…a bit far? Like Jesus Christ some of y’all need to eat a snickers. I also think some of the wording like “bitching about world issues” and “whining about their shitty parents” might’ve thrown me off but that’s not your fault and really a non-issue 🤷🏽‍♀️

you can delete this ask if you want I really won’t mind, I think I can just see as to why there were so many ‘yeah, but…’ rebloggers.

I actually really appreciate asks like this. For a multitude of reasons, but also because it gives really good insight and outer perspective for both me and other people who are aware of or involved in the discussion.

I think what a lot of people don't yet grasp about me is that while I may hold an opposing view to yours (general, not directed), in the vast majority of cases I still very much understand why people would think the way they do and where that thought process comes from and goes.

Its very, very easy to fall into the mindset of thinking that not helping when you have the ability to makes you a bad person or however in/directly causes suffering. Its very easy to be in the mindset of one single individual making a magnitude of difference.

I fully and genuinely understand and comprehend a lot of the points being brought up.

I just don't agree with them and hold a different outlook on those issues.

For example:

Talking about enjoying a queer ship to me is not 'political' in the sense that, personally, if you're a homophobe and upset by generic conversations about queer people, I really could not give a fuck. And if you raise objections to me talking about two dudes kissing, I'm simply going to remove you from my space because clearly it is not beneficial for either of us to share it. And I made it.

Its obviously very very much down to personal discretion to decide where that line is and what that bracket encompasses, but I think the most universal aspect of that safe space post was trying to get people to understand that forcing others to suffer in solidarity isn't activism and that strangers are not obligated to allow you to use them as support and a dumping ground for your needs.

Spreading around videos of people's dead loved ones isn't activism.

Spamming taglines and buzzwords on completely unrelated posts and videos isn't activism.

Relying on complete strangers for emotional and mental support and regulation while dumping vulnerable, graphic, personal information on them is neither safe nor healthy.

People are not obligated to smother or confine their happiness because of your misery. If you're having a bad day you have no right to tell other people they can't be happy in front of you.

A lot of people, mostly white knighters and people of color took the post as "a white privileged pig saying its okay to let racism slide because you want to play your video games" (actual hate mail I received) and that's so laughably and wildly far from the actual basis of the post.

I've had bigots in my servers before. Homophobes or racists who've slipped through the cracks.

You know what happens when they say something homophobic or racist?

They're immediately removed, blocked and reported, and their information is placed in a private document I keep. I issue an apology to the members of the server for their actions, and life goes on.

People are, of course, entitled to take the post as they see fit. They're entitled to their own perspectives and opinions. I'm more than happy to simply focus on the people who have taken support, guidance and solace in the post.

[jeonqkooks]

jungkook #33 from the fluff list 💗 (even better if its like fboy badboy jungkook getting flustered and shy around oc hehe)

daft pretty boys | jjk

pairing: jungkook x reader

prompt: "i can't think around you."

rating: G

word count: 0.8k

genre/warnings: classmates to .. lovers?, college au, basketball captain!jk, he's neither a fuck boy nor a bad boy he's just a cute boy <3, fluff, swearing as per uzh, i plagiarized MYSELF bc the shit mentioned here was actually taken from my final paper for a film class two years ago lmaooooooo

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

If there's one thing that Jungkook absolutely despises, it's when people think jocks are dumb. It's a common misconception and it's downright hurtful sometimes; just because Jungkook is the basketball captain, doesn't mean that anybody has the right to assume he's got hay for brains.

However, if someone were to come up to him right now and say it to his face, he probably wouldn't disagree.

"So yeah, if they lose the memories of these relationships, I think they'd also be losing parts of themselves that make them whole, because an individual's identity is an accumulation of multiple smaller identities they have with every single intimate relationship that ultimately forms one collective identity, y'know?" you finish, and it's not until then that Jungkook comes back down to earth, realizing that he's just been staring at you this whole time. "Anyway, what do you think?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah! Same, uhm," Jungkook stammers. "I also thought about their collective relationsh- I mean, collective identity and multiple identities and-"

You purse your lips as you take in his whole demeanor, like a nervous child fumbling with his words. "Did you not watch the movie?"

He did watch the movie. In fact, Jungkook watched it three times over the weekend because that's how much he liked it. When he registered for this class - History of Popular Cinema - at the end of last semester, he was hoping that it'd be an easy elective so he could focus more on basketball and his core courses. And for the most part, this film class is easy. All he has to do is watch movies and hand in a few short essays every now and then. Piece of cake.

Then the final paper rolls around and the professor assigns everybody a partner to work with. In theory, it should still be a piece of cake, because there still isn't that much to do anyway.

So why is it so fucking hard all of a sudden?

Jungkook had never really noticed you before you became his designated collaborator for the month. Never saw you on campus, never saw you attending the games. Hell, he didn't even know your name until this final assignment.

"I watched it," he defends himself lamely.

"Okay. And?"

"It was good."

You frown, and all Jungkook can think about is how adorable that crease between your eyebrows is. How he just wants to reach across the table and smooth it over, or better yet, kiss it away.

He's fully aware of how stupid he must look, with his sweaty palms and his words falling over each other like goddamn Jenga pieces, in front of a girl that he's been obsessed with for weeks now. Jungkook doesn't normally do crushes, but the more time he spends with you to work on this lame ass paper, the more he finds his mind drifting to you even when you're not in his vicinity.

He thinks you're so pretty when you absentmindedly bite your lip whenever you're concentrating. He thinks you always smell like jasmine, and he's delighted by how your scent lingers on his own clothes after every time you meet, like he's carrying home a reminder of you. He thinks you're ten leagues smarter than him when you text him whole paragraphs detailing how postmodern filmmakers flirt with the concept of identity fragmentation through different types of cinematic manifestation as a reflection of the realistic postmodern person, because what the fuck does that even mean?

"You're not doing a very good job at convincing me you watched the movie," you say.

Jungkook groans internally - and a little externally too - as he runs a hand down his face. "I watched it, I promise," he tells you. "I watched it, and I really liked it. It made me think about a lot of deep shit that I don't normally think about."

"Uh huh," you say slowly. Your frown is still there, but now it's embedded in confusion as you try to understand his dilemma. "Then tell me about that. What was the deep shit?"

"I can't."

"Why not?"

How is he supposed to explain that every single thought he had suddenly grew legs and yeeted itself out the window the second he saw you arrive today, wearing a stunning smile and a t-shirt that says Caution: Full of Shenanigans? Not once in his entire life had Jungkook felt so no thoughts, head empty.

"Because I can't think around you," he settles on being honest. "Because I keep thinking about you when you're not here, yet when you are, I can't even think at all."

It takes a minute for his words to sink into your brain, and Jungkook watches nervously as a blush spreads across your cheeks, so rosy that he just wants to grab your face and pepper kisses all over. For the first time since he has known you, you don't know how what to say.

The sight of you, rendered speechless by him being rendered an idiot, has Jungkook blushing too. Despite the patch of bashful silence that ensues, somewhere outside the metaphorical windows of his and your minds, both your thoughts are riding off into the sunset together, holding hands.

all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 27.05.2023]

[pharawee]

I've been meaning to make a list of spooky (Thai - because negl that's 99% of what I watch) BL series and movies and what better time to post this than in October?

Spooky BL are my favourite flavour of BL. Turns out, there's actually a lot of them (maybe because Thailand does horror so well). These are only the ones I've watched (and enjoyed) so this list isn't complete.

*On another note: horror doesn't faze me at all so I can't really accurately say how scary some of these are. If you have squicks or triggers like jump scares, gore or bad endings please feel free to ask and I will do my best to give you a heads-up.

**This has been updated in October 2024 to include new shows and movies.

✨Spooky Thai BL✨

7 Days Before Valentine | This BL is a lot more introspective and heavy than other BLs on this list. It's beautifully filmed and very dark, however, which makes it the perfect watch for a spooky October evening.

1000 Years Old | Was it really all that spooky? Probably not. But sometimes spooky is a quirky vampire with an umbrella for every occasion and his clueless alien-loving boyfriend.

🎞️After Sundown | A period ghost movie slash love story with ZeeNuNew. Make sure to watch the uncut version if you can find it because it adds additional context and atmosphere.

Dead Friend Forever | This show has its spooky moments but at its core it's more of a psychological thriller with a few slasher tropes on the side. If you're in the mood for some suspense and not put off by heavy themes then this is definitely one of the highlights on this list.

🎞️Death Is All Around | Saint Suppapong coming through with another spooky production - this one about death and the afterlife. It also has Seng Wichai, Bas Suradej and Dun Romchumpa (presumably as a couple) but has yet to be released internationally.

Dear Doctor I'm Coming For Soul | This one has reapers and ghosts and lots of bittersweetness. It's not that creepy since the supernatural elements are very matter-of-fact. It will make you cry though, sorry. :(

Ghost Host, Ghost House | Spooky with incredible chemistry between the leads and a cast of characters that you will immediately fall in love with.

He She It | A three-episode miniseries with a haunting soundtrack and a nice plot twist. This will make you miss JeffGameplay. :(

He's Coming To Me | Probably one of the first series everyone will think of. Not that spooky but a solid ghost (love) story with a murder mystery at its core.

Hidden Love | This is a budget show filmed under serious constraints during the worst of the covid pandemic. It's clichéd. It's over the top. But it's also got its charms. It comes with a tragic ghost (love) story that completely overshadows everything else with its many flashbacks and plot twists. If you manage to get over the camp. I warned you.

The Hidden Moon | The story of this BL is a lot better than its editing (it is after all by the same author as I Feel You Linger in the Air) but it's definitely worth the watch for its spooky vibes and the ongoing and very intriguing mystery of the ghost story.

Low Frequency | Not spooky at all, and a bit slow and empty at times, but it has ghosts (in a way) and a sweet enough couple.

Make a Wish | Unfortunately, this has never had an inter release. There's inofficial subs floating around on grey sites but as of yet the series hasn't been fully translated. Which is a pity because it's a cute show about angels and spirit possession and (some) murder mystery.

Midnight Museum | I'm stubbornly putting this under BL. This show has everything and everyone. It's genuinely spooky at times but mostly draws on folklore, the mystical and an absolutely stellar cast.

OMG! Vampire | Well, it has vampires - which by definition should make it spooky but actually it's neither spooky nor particularly good - unless you miss LongFrank (which is a valid excuse).

🎞️Red Wine in the Dark Night | The oldest entry in this list. Admittedly, not very spooky (and instead rather surreal and sad), but it has one (1) vampire and Fluke Natouch in a role that's more grounded than we're used to nowadays.

Something in my Room | A spooky show with ghosts, mystery and romance that hides a lot of commentary behind metaphors and allegory. Criminally underrated because it didn't have a wide enough release. If you want to binge something fun and spooky for Halloween then this is the series to go for. Prepare tissues.

The Spell | A vertically filmed indie horror BL that was recently recommended to me. It comes with a serious SA warning so be aware of that if you decide to give it a try.

The Whisperer | Whatever happened here, it's not worth it. It could have been (maybe) if the production company didn't hold the last episode hostage until this day, but without a finale to maybe redeem some of the characters it's really not worth the watch unless you like the actors.

✨Not spooky but we're here for the vibe! ✨

4 Minutes | This show has mystery, style and time loops. So many time loops. Bring a whiteboard and marker for theories.

Every You, Every Me | This show is only just releasing in October 2024 but will apparently heavily lean into the fated soulmates and parallel realities trope.

Century of Love | Another gorgeous and suspenseful high-budget show about soulmates with plenty of fantasy tropes to choose from.

I Feel You Linger in the Air | Everything about this show is simply beautiful. It comes with a few supernatural elements that draw heavily on atmosphere and cinematography - but make sure to keep some tissues ready.

I Saw You in My Dream | The vibe of this show is both cozy and mysterious so it's perfect for an October binge-watch.

La Pluie | La Pluie draws from its fantastic premise and then it just goes from there. It offers amazing character development and a deep-dive into what it actually means to be soulmates.

Lover Merman | Exactly what it says in the title. Sadly it's not been released yet and it's currently MIA.

The Luminous Solution | Mysteries, a magical coffee shop, plot twists and a whole lot of confusion. Personally, I really liked it but it's definitely flawed.

Memory in the Letter | Time travel AND interdimensional mirrors. This is beautiful, almost like a fairy tale - if you can overlook the abrupt and slightly shocking ending.

On Cloud Nine | Short and beautiful. An indie production that's more ethereal than genuinely spooky.

The Sign | This show went all out. If you like crime mysteries, action sequences, fated lovers and folklore, then this is THE show for you.

Triage | A fantasy thriller set in Sammon's Manner of Death universe. No spooky vibes but plenty of suspense and an ongoing time loop.

Two Worlds | Parallel universes but make it gritty and grounded with plenty of angst and whump (and amazing love scenes). You're welcome. :)

✨Not a BL but hey, I know that actor!✨

Enigma | Win Metawin (and surprise guest!) in an incredibly well done 4-episode series about the occult with interesting worldbuilding and the promise of a second season.

🎞️Ghost Lab | Tor Thanapob and Ice Paris in a genuinely gruesome, shocking and scary horror movie. You've been warned.

Girl From Nowhere | One of the best things tv has to offer, and genuinely dark as well. Up Poompat, Pepo Nutchapan and James Teeradon feature in some of the loosely-connected episodes.

Haunted Universities 2 & 3 | James Teeradon (pt2) and Mark Siwat (pt3) in a horror anthology series set in and around campus.

🎞️Hoon Payon | Phuwin Tangsakyuen, Up Poompat and Bank Nuttawat in a classic spiritual ghost story. More shocking than scary.

🎞️Inhuman Kiss | Oab Oabnithi and Great Sapol (sadly, not as a couple) in a sad and romantic take on a classic Thai legend.

🎞️Inhuman Kiss: The Last Breath | JJ Krissanapoom in a thematically loose continuation of the first movie.

Let's Fight Ghost | A Thai remake of a fun and somewhat spooky kdrama with spiritual themes. And Saint Suppapong.

Peaceful Property | The verdict's still out on whether this is or isn't a BL (as of October 2024 the show is still running) but it offers plenty of spooky vibes, a stellar gmmtv ensemble cast and, yes, some queer rep too.

🎞️Pee Nak 1, 2, 3 and 4 | I'm biased because I really like this movie series. It's spooky but in a fun way. It has queer characters (as comedic relief - but not in a degrading way) and can get surprisingly deep. Watch this if you want to see (baby!) Tar Atiwat grow up on screen (because he's in all four movies). The third movie rewards you with some surprisingly sweet MeanPlan that continues into the fourth movie.

🎞️Operation Undead | A proper historical zombie movie with Nonkul Chanon (and Boss Thawatchanin if you can spot him). This movie has yet to release internationally but once it does we're definitely in for a treat.

School Tales | A Thai horror anthology centred around students at various schools. This series has Fiat Patchata, Kay Lertsittichai, Pepo Nutchapan, Mark Siwat and, most prominently, Saint Suppapong and Chimon Wachirawit in well-paced 50-minute episodes.

Shadow | Personally, I love everything about this show and I'm still hoping against all hope that it'll get a second season. It has queer characters (without being a BL - which disappointed a lot of people due to the fact that it was advertised as such), amazing cinematography, storyteling and acting and more dark and spooky themes than I can count on both hands.

The Stranded | One of my favourite series ever. If you watched LOST then you know what to expect. This has 3 QL couples (Perth Tanapon & Mark Siwat, Win Pawin & Tanthai Tatchapol, Ticha Wongtipkanon & Chaleeda Gilbert) but don't expect any of them to get a happy ending. Sadly, this series ended on a cliffhanger and won't get a second season due to the lead actor's tragic passing and Nadao's dissolution.

The Tenant | This was marketed as a horror BL but there's nothing left of that in the actual trailer. It stars Pepo Nutchapan and Boss Pornpipat (House of Stars) alongside Tan Kittinan (Love Puzzle) and I can't wait to watch this once it's released internationally.

✨Upcoming Spooky BL✨

Happy Ending | The pilot trailer for this was full of opulent dark fantasy thriller vibes.

The Hell Guard | Chains of Heart but make it spooky. Oh, I am so excited for this!

Goddess Bless You From Death | A horror murder mystery with a familiar cast and amazing visuals.

I Love/Kill You | A psychological thriller that might have plenty of horror to go with it, from the same author as 7 Days Before Valentine.

Khemjira | Past lives and curses and dark folklore - if you go by the (very well-written) novel, this BL will have it all.

My Golden Blood | GMMTV does vampires, part 1. I hope this is every bit as glorious as the pilot trailer suggests.

My Imaginary Boyfriend | Based on another one of Pat Rangsimant's novels (my favourite, actually). This one is more grounded, and spooky in a more psychological sense.

Mystique in the Mirror | Another of Pat Rangsimant's novels (and psychological horror too by the looks of it). This one started filming in 2023 and since then... nothing. :(

The Red Envelope | A Thai remake of Marry My Dead Body starring PP Krit and Billkin Putthipong.

Revamp - The Undead Story | GMMTV does vampires, part 2 - but this was originally a BounPrem project (and it still is, rest assured) by Studio Wabi Sabi.

Spare Me Your Mercy | A dark crime thriller set in Sammon's Manner of Death universe with an amazing cast and a very prolific director.

Vamp | Very likely not a BL but with many familiar faces. And vampires. One can never have too many vampires (unless you're in Paris and it's just after WW2).

Zomvivor | The only zombie series on this list has entered pre-production and is slated to be released in 2024 (but hopefully before the end of the year). Will it have BL? I don't know, but it stars pretty much all of domundi's acting couples (and more).

[monsterblogging]

So, it finally clicked that while the average person does in fact broadly comprehend that people are neither good nor evil - they're good and bad, and have free will - they also can't understand why some people would fully commit themselves to completely awful causes or to being a terrible person throughout their entire lives. They can't really picture how this works, because they can't imagine themselves choosing to die on a hill of Being A Terrible Person.

This void in their comprehension is where the myth of the Ontologically Evil Person is very likely to come and settle in sooner or later, because it seems to finally provide an answer that makes sense of otherwise senseless cruelty and violence. Agonizing questions like "Why would my boyfriend spend so much energy on making me feel like shit and breaking me down?" "Why would this historical figure decided to kill all of these people?" and "Why would this guy go start a cult and murder everyone?" are finally given an answer, and the formerly-bewildered person finally has some peace of mind.

Because of this, the myth of the Ontologically Evil Person is incredibly hard to get out of people's minds once it takes root. For one thing, bad ideas are like bad habits; it doesn't really work to tell people to Just Stop With Them, because without something else to take its place? They're going to fall back on it.

And if somebody's been traumatized from abuse? The last thing they want to hear is that they're basically dehumanizing their abuser and that's not cool, because it feels to them like the other person is taking their abuser's side and telling them to get fucked. Even if this not what's happening, the survivor's brain is currently operating on fight/flight/fawn/freeze mode, and a brain operating fight/flight/freeze/fawn mode is keyed to making snap decisions to try and remove you from the danger as soon as possible, which means categorizing everything into black and white. This person couldn't care less about the history of eugenics right now; literally all they care about is being safe.

"Okay, so if the Ontologically Evil Person doesn't exist, how the hell do you explain those fuckers over there?" some of you are probably asking.

Here's the deal. Literally every human being alive can and will do terrible things if they're sufficiently scared and desperate. They're in no position to appreciate that nearly all asshole behavior can be explained by a lack of critical social and self-management skills, or by a lack of access to self-improvement (including being too traumatized to trust means of self-improvement).

People who are scared, insecure, and under high levels of stress will often cling to anything that makes them feel better, because they want to feel safe and secure and not in psychological and/or physical agony. (Stress does an absolute number on your body, too.)

Being reliant on a shitty behavior, belief system, or product for some measure of feeling secure and safe is how you get people saying things like "If I didn't act mean, everyone would just walk all over me!" or "I was really depressed before I found this, so if I gave it up I'm going to get depressed again, and I might hurt myself." (And there might be some truth to this one! This might indeed happen if they give it up cold turkey, and without finding an alternative!) It's how you get people conducting """scientific""" studies to """prove""" that their bigotry is totally justified and not at all irrational. ("Well of course these people are genetically inferior, they wouldn't be poor and disease-ridden if they weren't... what do you mean, systemic inequality and uneven healthcare access? No that's obviously fake and made up by More Bad People.")

People also act in unhealthy ways to deal with personal insecurities implanted by parents or society. You have people out there whose parents drummed it into their heads that second place was for worthless losers, or that no one would love them if they didn't look or act a certain way. You have people who absorbed the idea that acknowledging the basic humanity of shitty people means that they have to forgive them and personally help them get better and just suffer through the abuse in the meantime.

This is how people choose to die on the hill of Being A Terrible Person. They weren't ontologically evil. They were scared, and they thought they saw a fortress on the top of that hill that would keep them (and perhaps also their loved ones) safe.

[littleblackraincloudofcourse]

Verna my beloved raven

I've seen a lot of ideas about who or what Verna truly is. Most have compared her to Death or the Grimm Reaper because she caused most of (some would say all of) the deaths of the Ushers. I don't fully agree with this simply because Death doesn't make deals and Death doesn't stop for or hurry for anyone. Death comes for all things in their time without emotion There is no reason for death to have offered them anything. There is also no reason for death to offer the kindness of a peaceful end.

The other idea I see the most is that Verna is a sort of crossroads demon. This idea does make more sense to me considering the kind of people she had been seen with throughout time and the deal she made with Roderick and Madeleine. Three things about that don't fit to me. First the way she trys to ease things for the children (except Fredrick but fuck him), she gives them a chance to walk away and have peaceful deaths closer to what she gave Lenore. Which brings me to point two, Lenore. What reason would a crossroads demon have to share all the good that Lenore had done and the lives she would save before giving her a peaceful instant death? The third thing is when the deal was first made, Roderick ask if its his soul he would be trading. Verna says souls aren't real but "If they were you already sold your earlier tonight when you killed Rufus Griswold". If this was a demon what did they gain from this deal?

I believe Verna is neither demon nor Death but the Devil herself. Verna is the fallen angel Lucifer. What she offered the Ushers, what she seems to have offered those before is the ultimate test of free will. What would you do with unlimited wealth or power? She never forced them or manipulated them. Every evil thing they did was entirely their choice. She even points this out to Madeleine when they meet and talks about all the terrible things humanity does to one another without her having to interfere. Then there is her decision with Pym about his trip. She says she came "topside" to see what they did. She knows the people they sacrificed along the way, even what part he played in these deaths. She even laments the injustice that corruptions like Fourtonato never face any real consequences for their actions. When she showed Roderick his true legacy she makes it clear those deaths where his alone, she played no part. But most of all her attempt at mercy for the children. They're doomed to day anyway but she tries to ease their pain. Taking Lenore seems to break her heart. She tries to explain to Perry that he's done enough. She gives the others chances to be honest, make amends or just walk away and be a peace. Exect Fredrick (that piece of shit) he made his choice the minute he starts mistreating his wife. Verna never interacted with him until his death because the decision was already made. The worse their behavior, the less of a chance she gave them for peace. She also never interacts with Auggie. He sees her but she doesn't offer him anything or even speak to him. She knows he would never make a deal like that.

There is a karmic balance to everything Verna does. One that fit the role of a reaper or demon. But the angel who was banished for questioning GOD? The angel who questioned free will itself. The angle made devil that everyone blames for the every bad decision they make. That seems like someone who would be interested in how things would play out and still be disappointed they didn't make better choices.

[ysljoon]

Hey savvvv<3 So i have a request, can you write like a established relationship smut of like simon (from cod) going absolutely feral while you ride his face? Thank youuu love you pookie🤍🤍

riding simon 'ghost' riley's face

warnings: oral (f receiving), use of pet names (lovie, sweetheart), afab reader (no use of y/n), overstimulation a/n: jay i really hope you like this im sorry for the delay oh em gee <3 MINORS DNI (have your age in your bio or you're getting blocked)

Simon had been gone on an operation for two months and you were counting down the days until he was home. Today was the day and you were sitting on the couch busily scrolling through different apps to keep yourself occupied. You couldn’t tell if it was minutes or hours until you heard the lock to the door turn and squeak on its hinges. You jumped up from your seat and scampered to see Simon placing his duffel bags on the floor and starting to take off the balaclava. Once the mask was off he met your eyes and and you couldn’t contain yourself you leapt yourself on to him and he caught you with ease. You planted kisses on every corner of his face you could reach, not even caring about the residual paint around his eyes.

“Simon, I missed you so much.” You tucked your head into his neck muffling your words a little.

“I missed you too lovie.” He traveled through the home with you still clinging on to him and once he found the bedroom he positioned you on the edge and started to kiss you with more passion and hunger. You loved when Simon used his height to dominate you and having him looming over you right now is all you dreamed about while he was away. Your hands roamed around all over his body and you felt some relief when you didn’t feel any new wounds on his torso and only the old scars you have become acquainted with over the years. 

You moved your hands down to his belt buckle and he stopped you by grabbing your wrists while not even pulling away from your lips. His reflexes never failed to leave you in awe. “You don’t hafta do anythin’ for me tonight. I’m gonna make up for all the time I left you alone. Gonna make my girl feel so good.” Hearing his gruff voice mixed with the intentions he had for you had you clenching your thighs together to get some relief for yourself. This action did not go missed by Simon. “Aw my poor girl needs to get off so bad. Let me help you sweetheart.” He crawled on to the bad so he was right above you and slid your pants fully off till you were only left in your shirt (its his shirt actually but that's neither here nor there) and panties. He pressed a thumb to your aching clit and rubbed small and slow circles but it was enough to already have you twitching. He was teasing your covered cunt and you let out whiny little whimpers hoping that was enough to give Simon enough of a hint that you need more. Simon usually would make you use your words to beg for what you need from him, but he was already mean enough for having to leave you for months. He doesn't want to make this harder for you tonight knowing how needy both you and him are.

He moved his face in between your legs and nipped the waistband of your panties and dragged them down to your ankles. He released the cloth from between his teeth and placed a gentle kiss on your very sensitive bud. “Come sit on my face lovie I need to taste you so bad. I’ve thought about your delicious fuckin’ cunt day in and day out while I was gone I need it.” You positioned yourself over his lips and while you had planned to only hover he wrapped his arms around your thighs and dragged you down till your fully bodyweight sank down on him. His lips wrapped around your clit and he sucked with so much force it had your back arching and you were crying out. Your hands tried to find purchase and clutched onto his shoulders. “C-Christ Simon. I won’t last at all if you keep it up.” “Just keep takin’ it sweetheart.” He punctuated his sentence with a nibble on your thigh and swiped his tongue along your soaked slit and inserted it inside. He hungrily ate you out and you felt an impending orgasm coming and you grinded against his tongue for extra pressure.

Your orgasm consumed your whole body and your thighs trembled around SImon’s head. You thought he would give you a small break before continuing, but he kept going and the overstimulation had you trying to pry yourself off of Simon’s face but his muscular arms gripped you in place and you couldn’t escape. “No use running from me lovie, I’m a man starved. Hope you get comfortable because you’re gonna be here for a long while.” You looked down and saw his smirk with your essence dripping down his chin.

[animeyanderelover]

Nsfw headcannons for madara?

Tw: Yandere themes, toxic relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, Nsfw, breeding kink, afab s/o

Tags: @shumidehiro @swagenemyartisan

Nsfw Hc’s

🌑​If we would consider the era he was born in, I can definitely see that traditions are a lot more sacred than they would be later on. Especially within a clan as feared and big as the Uchiha clan there are values and traditions that neither you nor him can fully avoid. One of those is most likely the ancient tradition of waiting until the wedding night to consummate the marriage to its fullest. Whilst Madara obviously thinks highly of his clan, I do think that he may just be tempted at times to mess with such an old custom at times, especially since the eldest of the Uchiha clan will probably be very adamant to have him do as the clan has always done. Messing with those old geezers at times is just quite amusing and he additionally gets to enjoy your flustered face by getting rough with you by making out with you. Yet he never goes further than that as he still decides to value the traditions of his clan. It's not like you are going anywhere as soon the vows of marriage will tie you two together.

🌑​He does his clan proud by savouring the wedding night with you fully until you are too exhausted to even form a single sentence anymore and the only word leaving your mouth will be his name. Hours upon hours he finally claims what is now rightfully his and he's quite pleased to know that this will be one of many times where he gets to rail you as passionately into the sheets as he does now. Passion is quite a good word to use for him though as he is like this when expressing his feelings in non-sexual as well as sexual ways. So you can fully expect to have many nights with him just as passionately and fierce as during your first time with him. Especially if we consider that as the head of the Uchiha clan, he is expected to keep an intimidating composure in public which at times prevents him from expressing his love fully to you so as soon as there are no watchful eyes with expectations, he is fully prepared to express all of his feelings to you.

🌑​Madara is the dominant part within the relationship in all aspects though and that also includes the bedroom activities. Madara can be quite lovable to you though despite the intimidating image many outsiders tend to have of him. That of course only if he is in a good mood but honestly, if him and his darling are on good terms there will be a lot of teasing and bickering going on and he will allow it. You can run your mouth a tad bit, he enjoys it if you can spit some searing lines and have a snarky demeanor because that makes it all the more enoyable to rail you out of your mind and watch you falling apart with every thrust of his. Not so smart now, are we? What can be a quite enjoyable and warm experience can feel very cold and possessive if Madara should be in a bad mood as he can use sex also as a mean to show you to whom you belong if you shouldn't behave yourself in which case his words can be icy and condescending as he comments how you could never be with another one as he has shaped your insides already so perfectly to only fit him perfectly.

🌑​Speaking if his size, he is well endowed down there and he most likely knows that too. He isn't necessarily tall if we're talking about his body height but I do think that if his darling would be smaller than him, he would definitely develop a size kink and would enjoy the potential panic whenever having your smaller build pressed beneath him. He also enjoys potential panic you might express whenever you feel worried about how he'll fit his cock inside of you even if you shouldn't be that much smaller than him. It never gets old for him as he jokingly likes to remind you that you've taken him before and that you will do it again as many times as he desires. Do Madara the favor of being as vocal as you can, maybe even to the point where people outside the bedroom can hear you and know just how good of a husband he is for you. Madara on the other hand doesn't want to be too loud by comparison although he groans and grunts a lot throughout the long sessions which last quite a while.

🌑​Whilst he is not going to admit it out loud, Madara has a thing for your hands tugging at his hair during sex. His hair is his pride and he has to take excellent care of it to maintain his mane of black hair so he enjoys even under normal circumstances if you appreciate it. It's quite different though if you do it whilst his shaft is buried deep inside of your pulsing walls and his whole body is already filled with sparks of pleasure as the sensation of your fingers pulling at his wild locks of hair and your nails scratching his head just hits different and only enhances the pleasure he's already experiencing in that moment. His position demands at times a lot of him and it can get somewhat exhausting and frustrating for him at times in which case he can blow off some steam wonderfully with you. Madara is traditional enough to use only one hole of yours most of the times, though at times he also enjoys seeing you kneeling in front of him with tears in your eyes, his hands entangled in your hair whilst forcing your head to bop back and forth as you do your best to not choke on his size.

🌑​Most of his precious cum gets dumped into your womb though as Madara has a desire to get you pregnant. Not only is he the head of his clan and for that is expected to have a strong heir to succeed him but besides those expectations other members of his clan have on him, he just has the simple wish of having a few kids with the person he loves. Not only would it tie you to him forever but it would also be quite adorable to have some children to raise with you and make them into strong and proud members of his clan. Your pregnancy and all the transformations your body would go through during that time would be low-key a bonus since he'd probably find your changed body with all the extra curves and weight quite attractive as all those changes are caused because your body is carrying his baby. He'd even want to show you off to others more during your pregnancy just to let them see how much you're glowing whilst expecting his baby.