#its kinda giving dating sim

[pysgodyn]

[waywardsalt]

tbh i might go ahead and put dungeons in as a part of the bellum x linebeck fic's plot since like. 1) struggling to actually figure out a main plot and having dungeons as sort of bit points to hit and be little bits of fitting exploration and bonding and 2) i do kinda want to do dungeons. i like thinking of them and again i do think its fitting.

[aw-bean-s]

Ik probably no one who follows me cares abt the sims 4 but I gotta bitch for a second about the expansion pack leak because what the hell?? Like man it's kinda cute? There's some kinda neat ideas? But man most ppl who are interested in that stuff already have it covered with mods, and on top of that it doesn't seem like enough to be an expansion it seems like a game pack AT MOST like we are all aware ea is greedy and sucks ass but jesus

[thecherrygod]

i told this guy what i dreamt about last night, bc once we had conversations about dreams and i told him id tell him the next one i have, and we are psychology students who happen to be dumbasses so he asked me if i thought i could interpret it bc of all the stuff that happened in it and i thought he was joking and i went “well its possible haha”. he asked me if i was comfortable doing so and telling him what i thought, but if i wasnt i could like. not tell him. my guy you have to tell me how much you actually wanna know about me as a person first

[heartfullofleeches]

I've mentioned the cursed arcade cabinet in the Fast Food Reader universe exactly once and I feel I should talk about it more- The cabinet was dropped off one day by some weird scientist guy who still pops up every now and again to see if Reader is still alive. The game is a dating sim where the player character tries to get a date with the love interest who is actively being stalked by someone else. Those who win the love interest's heart end up dead shortly after completing the game-

Fast Food Reader blantly ignores the main game in favor of the cute little mini games which saves their ass on multiple occasions as well as draw attention from the entity masquerading as the stalker away from its initial target towards them. If Reader paid attention they'd notice new options to give gifts to this mysterious character. Fast Food Reader is too busy on that grind to care-

-

"You can't have him .... You can't!"

Fast Food Reader: That's great and all, but I'm kinda busy trying to catch the ingredients I need for the next level- How the hell am I supposed to make flan with no eggs?!

[hetaherr]

playing video games with them | anemo boys <3

: kazuha, xiao, venti, wanderer

:mostly crack, a little suggestive but no warnings

well anyway this is another reupload!! added kuni’s part also got lazy to proof read its just a headcanon anyway!!! i play wayy to much video games and id love to share my hobbies with these sweet babies <3

kazuha

i think this baby is a really chill gamer, he enjoys the cozy aspect of video games. thats why i think games like minecraft, stardew valley, animal crossing and the sims!! cozy video game dates are a norm for you guys when its too hot outside or too rainy.

imagine playing stardew valley with him, curled up under the covers with your MATCHING SWITCH CONSOLES. you guys working through the first few years of the game as little farm people doing little farm things. he’d even find some helpful guides online so you guys can maximise your finances in the game. honestly i can see how he gets a little petty at the fact that you MARRIED some npc in the game and he had to watch the whole cutscene while you joked around that he hadn’t given you enough attention and this was all his fault. now kazuha hates that particular npc, and he’s definitely pouting the whole night. give him lots of smooches, tell him that no video game code can replace your pookie wookie baby boy <3

but there, of course are other ways you can make up for it, like asking him to marry you- in animal crossing duh!! he’d take this whole thing very seriously obviously, its a wedding silly. he’d prepare a little wedding venue in his world by the beach, even going as far to design a cute little tux. it’s adorable, also don’t think for a second that he wouldn’t give you a kiss (giggling after) when the wedding officiant says you may now kiss. i also can picture kazuha buying you a promise ring irl , with a maple leaf engraved onto it. yes it was a animal crossing wedding, but it was YOUR WEDDING non the less.

another thing i can imagine is while you were playing the sims kazuha would 100% ask to create a little family with you. he’d even help to go “shopping” online for CC that would fit your characters or homes. kazuha DIES A LITTLE inside as you carefully curate each of the characters, spending hours deciding on the perfect outfits, hairs and personalities. coming up with mini fantasy stories about the mini yous and giggling along with him when they get a little too absurd. your cute family consists of you, kazuha and a little white cat. kazuha likes watching you get a little flustered whenever his character flirts with yours, sending a romantic haiku your way. not to mention the first time your character’s woohoo’ed he teasingly said:

“its honestly a shame that they’re the only ones that get to woohoo you know?”

anyway kazuha is 100% down to try as many games as he can with you, playing games with him is 10 bells out of 10 bells hehe

xiao

gamer xiao… yea he kinda scares me. xiao plays shooter games for sure, like obviously he’s had an eboy valorant phase but lets skip past that for now. its definitely more than normal to hear him grumbling how “dogshit” some of his teammates are. he’s definitely muted from chat on several games, also banned from league most of the time from being toxic in the chats.

playing competitive games with xiao is definitely an experience, and it definitely does not feel like the stereotypical pocket sage and hyper-carry jett. so please proceed with caution. the first time you and him played together, he may have gotten a little TOO HEATED and may have cussed you out on accident forgetting it was his loving, doting and caring partner who just wanted to participate in one of his hobbies. xiao doesn’t mean to get angry at you, please bare with him when the words “how is this person so fucking bad, how are they SO USELESS JUST GET OFF THE GAME DUDE” slip out. and oh boy… xiao immediately regrets his words, he feels so bad. he was actually overjoyed when you asked to play with him, even if he doesn’t actually show it, now he definitely assumes that you won’t ever want to play games with him EVER, hell maybe you want to break up. he’s spiralling. he apologises so much and he’s so awkward and so fidgety. its hard to stay mad at him, when he’s like this you have to admit he’s a little cutie. the next few days he’s definitely cautious and on edge around you, he finds it weird that you let go of the situation so easily and just moved on. he cant believe he let such vulgar words be thrown towards you. so after a conversation about his behaviour, you both decide maybe its best you just be an observer. you’re more than happy to straddle him, chin on his shoulder when he plays at his pc. and xiao LOVES IT, there is honestly nothing more comforting than you give him a little kiss when he starts to get a little too tense. occasionally when you face the screen and watch his games, he gets so nervous to play well. and xiao absolutely DIES when you compliment his abilities. bro needs the praise please, in that moment he thinks you’re so sexy and you have such a caring soul and his ears are tinted so red. don’t tease him though, he won’t be able to play the game properly.

another thing xiao is so weirdly good at is arcade games. i can picture arcade dates and xiao is just godly at them, claw machines, those basketball ones, car racing- you name it sweetheart and he’s earning those tickets like he needs to feed his 20 kids as a single dad. xiao acts so nonchalant about it, shrugging his shoulders as if this talent of his isn’t a big deal, but inside he’s so proud that he’s managed to get you that plushie he knows you’d been eyeing the whole day. he loves the way you grip onto his biceps pulling him to another machine to test his abilities, he may grumble about you overreacting but he’s so happy just to see you smile. and having you cheer him on the side is such an added bonus, you’re such a cute cheerleader. anyway i rate xiao a “please dont scold me baby im trying my best” out of “FUCK YOU FUCKING SUCK”

venti

horror games. literally venti HATES THEM but he cant get enough of it. playing phasmophobia would be so incredibly fun, but also a total shitshow. like im talking him making you do all the work while he intentionally provokes the ghost. at the same time he’s too scared to do anything so, he’s always really close to you. so if anything ever happens, you’d be a total idiot to think he’d try to help you, venti would be the first one out the door and running away. venti is also so horrendously LOUD, literally half the time instead of getting spooked by the game, your having a heart attack inducing jump scare from his random screaming. don’t even get me started on roblox horror games, every week there’s some new game he discovered on tiktok, and you are playing it with him, you have to.

another game venti loves to play is sims, but he’s about 100 times more chaotic compared to kazuha. he loves those ridiculous challenges and he wants to have like 10 babies with you, and then proceeds to cry when they are taken away from the sims version of cps. for some reason he has all the packs and likes to screw around with everything. he makes silly little bets with you in any game, for example in the sims he’d bet with you whether your 23rd child is going to be a boy or girl, most bets are harmless like a kiss or cuddles, unless he’s in the mood.

speaking of intimacy, venti needs to be holding you while playing games. arms linked, lying on your lap or you in his, honestly you just let him because he’s so cheeky about it anyway. venti also loves playing music related games with you, duh!! karaoke, guess the song, finish the lyric. ANYTHING!! whether you can sing or not, he just loves to hear your voice, definitely teases you if you cant though hehe. karaoke is so fun, if your shy he definitely eases you into letting lose and breaking out of your comfort zone, duetting with you is something he loves because music is his passion and honestly it hits so close to home for him. you’d often find him squeezing your hand as a form of encouragement.

im rating venti a solid 8 red bulls out of “i’ve already had 15”.

wanderer

this little emo baby is 100% only ever playing single player games, things that are extremely grindy and super lore heavy (bro is on subreddits looking at game theories and conspiracies, he would love to talk to you about them if you ever asked)!! im talking about bloodborne, doom, assassin’s creed and dark souls. he hates online multiplayer games because he doesn’t want to interact with “idiots” as he’s mentioned numerous times. so unfortunately its not often that you have a chance to play any type of multiplayer games with him.

however when it comes to his gaming sessions, he’d subtly invite you to come watch him because you’re like his own little streaming audience, and he loves it. the way you comment about how cool his character looks, or ask questions about gameplay mechanics. he loves how you involve yourself in his hobbies, it turns him to mush. he also loves how you play with his hair while peeking over his shoulder to look at the tv screen as he taps away at the controller. sometimes when the game gets a little boring he notices how your breath bounces off his neck, needless to say, those nights end up a bit more differently than how you originally imagined.

also if your ever interested in the game, kuni would “hesitantly” offer you to play on a new save file. but he’s actually elated that you’re going to try his FAVOURITE video game ever. you take your place in his lap as he explains to you the basics, not many would notice but you can ever so slightly hear the excitement in his voice. kuni complains about you being so lost but he’s so careful with explaining certain things, he’s also so patient as you take hours designing your character, well he’s okay being patient since its you. kuni absolutely DISSOLVES when facing a difficult boss, puzzle or obstacle, you kinda go into a slump against his chest and beg him to help you get past it. he snickers that your so weak, but somehow he manages to get through so swiftly- i guess he needs to show off a little to you. he also may complain a lot but thats just how this baby boy is, dont get discouraged he actually thinks you’re so cute.

also if you ever find yourself playing overcooked, moving out, gang beasts or any of those party games with kuni… good luck, just because he doesn’t like competitive games like valorant, DOES NOT MEAN HE ISNT COMPETITIVE. he gets so worked up and its honestly a little cute if you can look past the crusty white dog behaviour. if you do end up getting into an argument over these games, dont be surprised. im lazy to give a rating so im giving him 10/10, again minus the crusty white dog.

edit: if you saw “anyway wanderer is a straight” HAHA i apologise maybe thats why i should straight proof reading oops hehe

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hii~ as you know its spooky month!! ;)

So i was thinking about a demon reader for the tadc cast

The reader looks like a stereotypical demon( horns ,hooves ,maybe a tail idk) BUT is chaotic good

I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

Ty❤️

TADC cast x demon!reader !

gonna knock this request out real fast then go lay down; i feel all uehdoivnffvnelfnfv but i am still on that grind !!!!!!! (please dont be like me please work on trying to create a healthy work/life balance and take care of yourself) short segments for this one sorry anon :(

CAINE:

honestly he would occasionally make himself look like an angel to match with you; give himself a halo and wings and all that! loves your energy, i said it once and ill say it again, i think caine would love a chaotic reader who keeps him guessing! keep this man on his toes, hes into that, keeps things fun!

POMNI:

naturally a little put off at first but warms up to you. does she think you can be a little too much? yeah, sometimes... does she know you mean well? yeah, and she tries not to hold your way of doing things against you! sometimes you let her fidget with your tail if shes feeling nervous about something

RAGATHA:

"you may be a demon but you're the sweetest person i know!", does not miss a day where she says she loves you.. should you ever think badly of yourself and believe there was a reason you were made into a demon in this world, ragatha will immediately dismiss any bad idea you have about yourself

JAX:

SAY IT WITH ME NOW!!! ITS ADMINS FAVORITE JAX HC!!! if you have a tail hes gonna fidget with it!! bonus if it wags around, like in the tail haver reader in a previous post; this dude would find it cute too... thrives in your chaos, you two just bounce off each other... not uncommon for jax to do a little prank and you trying to correct what he messed with in the most.. well chaotic way.. probably ends with more people confused or annoyed, though

KINGER:

probably thinks youre a legitimate demon for a minute before realizing, oh wait no you arent youre just like. funky like that, digital world stuff. please try to tone down any chaotic activities around him, he is already freaking out enough as things are TToTT

ZOOBLE:

i think they would be similar to pomni, kind of put off by your energy but knows youre not a threat. plus they would rather hang out with you than half of the people here so hey, i guess you can say youre winning. thinks your horns are cool, regardless of what shape you as the reader imagine them to be. i think i also mentioned that zooble seems like the type to be into darker stuff and i think that would also tie in with supernatural stuff, and well, demons are supernatural, right? i mean youre not really a demon, but the appreciation is still there

GANGLE:

maybe this is self projection again, or maybe its because i think gangle would be an artist and this is just. a common artist trait, but they would think youre like. really pretty. thinks demons and monsters are cute, has definitely played a monster dating sim at some point before getting stuck in the digital world

not much else to say i just think this idea was a little funny for gangle.. i can kinda see zooble being a monster dating sim fan... maybe i just kin them both

[absolutebl]

Hi P’ABL, building off an earlier ask you answered, what are your top recommendations if I want to watch a BL where the main focus is the romance between two characters? Something along the lines of Semantic Error for example? Or even Old Fashioned cupcake?

Hum, you mean where there is little to no outside plots, external pressure, or secondary characters? Most KBLs are pretty closed systems but they of have external pressures. Lemme think... there are shorts of course. Okay I did a ratings sort and then just read through my favorites with this in mind... this is pretty darn subjective tho.

BLs that are just simple sweet romances

High School Setting

I Cannot Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai (Japan 2023) - a very simple friends to lovers romance.

HIStory 2: Crossing the Line (Taiwan 2018) - classic sports romance

My School President (Thailand 2023) - the high school version of soft boys being soft, there's a side "plot" and a band but who cares?

About Youth (Taiwan 2022)

University Setting

Semantic Error (Korea 2022) - asker chose this as their primary example.

A Breeze of Love (Korea 2023) - reunion romance

A First Love Story (Korea 2021) - 2 part short that is exactly what you want.

Oxygen the series (Thailand 2020) - the university version of soft boys being soft, this one is a hyung with the young rich boy chasing the older orphan

We Best Love (Taiwan 20210 - part one is enemies to lovers, part 2 is office reunion enemies to lovers 2nd chance.

2gether (Thailand 2020) - oh the pining ridiculousness

Star in My Mind Star and Sky (Thailand 2022)

Hidden Agenda (Thailand 2023) - that isn't hidden at all

Love By Chance (Thailand 2018) - watch for AePete and TinCan but don't bother with the other threads

Why R U? (Thai 2020) - I mean it's madness but there is no other plot but the romances

Why R U? (Korean adaptation of Thai original) (Korea 2023)

2 Moons 2 is kinda the same thing, but I don't rate it as high as the Why R U?s. There are many who would call me crazy for this.

I thought about including the Love Class series but both of them have stalking sub plots. And I'm inferring you don't want any darkness or stress at all.

Office Romances

Old Fashion Cupcake (Japan 2022) - asker chose this as a second example, although I would call it a bit more complex given the themes of self discovery and worth.

Our Dating Sim (Korea 2023) - basically a reunion romance (second chance) but there is a bit of work stuff.

Be Loved In House: I Do (Taiwan 2021) - office romance, it's Taiwan so like We Best Love it'll be a little chaotic but I think it's what you're looking for.

Love is Science? BL Cut (Taiwan 2021) - the gays are the side couple there is a noona romance lead and a mature romance side, everything soft romance all day long.

Step By Step (Thailand 2023) - pretty classic office romance, Korea's version is called The New Employee and is also good but there is a lot more about the actual job as part of the plot.

Love Mate (Korea 2023) - aggressive pursuit from the new intern but it's a Kdrama so its ultimately soft...

Roommates of Poongduck 304 (Korea 2022) - cohabitation and office enemies to lovers

Foodie Romances

Bon Appetit (Korea 2023) - reunion romance

The Tasty Florida (Korea 2021) - love at first sight

What Zabb Man! (Thailand 2022) - he knows him by the taste of that one dish!

You Are Ma Boy (Vietnam 2021) - had to throw in something from Vietnam

Countryside Setting

Love Tractor (Korea 2023) - city boy meets country boy, they fall in love, opposites attract

A Tale of Thousand Stars (Thailand 2021) - okay this does have lots of extra characters and some complexity because it's GMMTV and Thailand but it is the most classic "romance" that Thailand has ever done gay. Kissing on cliffs at sunset and parting at airports and everything.

Some More (Korea 2018) - another great short that meets your criteria

Okay I think that's it, if you want to give more restrictions I could tailor the list down more.

[kenziesimsblog]

SIMS 3 YOUTUBER LEGACY

SIMS 3 YOUTUBER LEGACY

FOR THIS LEGACY YOU CAN CHOOSE WHERE YOU LIVE BUT MUST BE A CITY CELEBRITY WORLD FOR GEN ONE PLEASE NOTE NOT ALL OF THIS INFORMATION OR TRAITS/GOALS FIT THE YOUTUBERS!

GEN 8 WAS A FILLER BECAUSE I COULDNT THINK OF ANYONE THEY HAPPENED TO POP UP ON MY RECOMMENED !

GENERATION 1- TARA YUMMY

you grew up in a rural town moving to the big city as soon as you got the chance , your confident with yourself and love to be social what does the city life hold for you?

STYLE PREFERENCE - Y2K

TRAITS - social butterfly, irresistible, party animal, dog lover and vegetarian

LIFETIME WISH- blog artist

GOALS

run a 5 star blog

get a partner have a few kids THEN BREAK UP no marriage yet

go clubbing every saturday night

adopt a dog -your a party animal throw birthday parties every weekend

throw parties for holidays sometimes -do not eat meat your a vegetarian

become a five star celebrity

when you reach 8 days before elder status get back with your ex and have a private wedding with your family

complete your lifetime wish then gen complete

OPTIONAL IF YOU HAVE THE MODELING MOD JOIN MODEL CAREER AND MASTER MODELING SKILL*

GENERATION 2- SAM AND COLBY

your parent was kinda of a party animal they never really grew up as soon as you reached young adult status you left.

STYLE PREFRENCE - DARK ACADEMIA

TRAITS- adventurous, night owl, rebellious, loves the outdoors and easily impressed

LIFETIME WISH- paranormal profiteer

GOALS

meet your best friend in high school and stay friends your whole life -pull pranks -when your first move out have atleast 2 roomies aside from your best friend

move out of roomie house with your best friend -join ghost hunting profession with bff

fall in love with co worker or bestie

get married fast

have as many kids as you want

must have triplets {can cheat this}

complete lifetime wish

GENERATION 3- STURNIOLO TRIPLETS

you and your triplets have always been close and its hard to move on

STYLE PREFERENCE - STREETWEAR

TRAITS (only give to main heir) - good sense of humor, friendly, schmoozer , excitable, and vehicle enthusiat

LIFETIME WISH- reach max influence with all social groups

CAREER- self employed

GOALS {follow with heir}

stay close to other triplets

you all move in together -you go to uni for fun ultimately dropping out

meet partner in uni

join any freelance career -only have one kid

be extremley close to child and partner

GENERATION 4- SIMPHORA (WRITTEN BY @simphoraa)

Name - Simphora °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･𐦍༘⋆

Description - You like to call yourself the “Jack of All Trades”, and eh.. you may not be actually considered one. But, you have a lot of interests, passions, the undying urge to explore new things, and acquire more knowledge and skills. Go show the world what you’re truly capable of!

Aesthetic - Luxurious Baddie

Traits - Ambitious, Dramatic, Computer Whiz, Hopeless Romantic, Workaholic

Lifetime wish - Forensic Specialist: Dynamic DNA Profiler

Goals:

Enroll in University and major in Technology

Live off-Campus and have one roommate

Get the disliked relationship with your roommate, and then find a reason to kick them out

Earn the Technology Degree

Reach level 10 in the Law Enforcement Career (choose the forensic branch)

Master the Logic skill

Create a Online Dating Profile

Fall inlove quickly with someone from the Online Dating website

Play video games once a day

Become a streamer, and livestream every Friday night (this is optional because you need to download the streamer mod from ModtheSims)

Befriend some supporters

Have as many kids as you want

GENERATION 5 - FLORYDA (WRITTEN BY @florydaax)

your life was cozy you wanted it more!

TRAITS- bookworm, cat person , clumsy, loner and socially awkward

LIFETIME WISH- the cat herder

CAREER- Lawyer (custom career by missyhissy) or law enforcement

GOALS

Join the Ballet/Dance after school activity as a child

Get a parttime job at the supermarket as a teen -Go to university and get a degree

Have at least 2 cats -Get married to your first boyfriend/ partner

Have 2 kids

Buy and read books every week

Master the Social Networking and Writing skills -Complete the lifetime wish and reach the top of the career

GENERATION 6- MR BEAST

you had a good life and you want to make sure others do to even if yours goes downhill

STYLE PREFERENCE= COMFY/ CASUAL

TRAITS- good, lucky, nuturing, ambitious, and charismatic

LIFETIME WISH- leader of the free world

CAREER- political

GOALS

donate to a charirty every week -do any opportunity that earns money or relationships

you meet a partner in high school but they cheat on you

your single for a while, until you meet a single parent

become close to them and there child

adopt 2 strays

adopt a kid

play a lottery when you can

your partner suddenly dies take in there kid'

have atleast one kid with your partner before they die

never remarry

complete lifetime wish

never have a bad relationship or distant friends

GENERATION 7- CATALEAH

you love animals and want to save them all

STYLE PREFERENCE - COTTAGECORE

TRAITS- animal lover, eco friendly, loves the outdoors, socially awkward and green thumb

LIFETIME WISH- the ark builder

CAREER- horseman

GOALS

get your first animal as a gift from your parent

have two of each animal that lifetine wish says

farm animals optional

master gardening skill

have a "perfect" garden

go to equestrian lot

learn to ride horse

be close to every animal

meet another animal lover

be close to your kids you lost your parents

complete lifetime wish

GENERATION 8 - CARLO AND SARAH

you want the perfect love life

STYLE PREFERENCE- FANCY

TRAITS- hopeless romantic, family orenited ,artistic, friendly and neat

LIFETIME WISH - surronded by family

CAREER- FREELANCE ARTIST

GOALS

meet your best friend in high school

when you graduate go to france

find your partner there

they move to town you get married

have 5 kids

do a family activity every holiday

throw many parties

complete lifetime

DONE

TAG ME IN POST I WOULD LOVE TO SEE!

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

Do you have recommendations for shows/books/whatever with canon/basically canon polyamory?

ok the only media w officially canon polyam i personally consumed are Iron Widow and Hades.

Iron Widow is a mecha scifi/chinese fantasy book, it has pacific rim mechanics, so it takes 2 ppl to pilot the mecha but its more dystopian in that the pilot (male) usually drains the life force of his concubine (female). the mc has a guy shes interested in from the start but she pushes him aside to seek her goals to become a concubine pilot (theres a very good reason for this but i dont wanna give too much away) ends up being forced to work w the most dangerous pilot (spoilers hes actually a misunderstood sweetheart and i love him), her first love somehow finds his way back into her life so he can be their ally and its very clear from the first time he meets the other guy that this bitch is bi af. At one point he literslly saves their lives and i wont elaborate on that cause again spoilers but someone mentioned it in a propaganda ask. They canonically fall in live w each other and start dating. Please look up the trigger warnings first cause theres some heavy subjects addressed in this book. The book itself has trigger warnings listed at the start so if u find it at a book store u can check them this was too.

Hades is a roguelike videogame w dating sim mechanics (ish) -you give gifts to characters to learn more about them, and theres two romance options but you can romance both at once, they're both aware of and okay with it, hinting that they mightve had a past even before zagreus was born (its greek gods one is death incarnate the other is one of the furies, they've basically existed since forever)

From the submissions I got:

ive been told Leverage is like the korrasami of polyam, as in they were as polyam as they could be in a show from 2010, so it sounds like its canon but not explicit because they couldnt get away with that.

The girls from Amphibia are apparently in a similar situation, heavily implied canon, someone told me it was confirmed by people who worked on the show, but i dont think its explicitly stated.

The Kane Chronicles apparently also has canon polyam, although its 2 bodies, cause I think one of them has a god in him or something? I never read the books, but I was told Sadie (i think thats her name? The girl) is in love w both of them, and kinda dating both too i think?

I dont know if Singing in the Rain is canon but theres that kiss gif that got prrtty popular on tumblr where kathy kisses one of the guys then the other, so it looks canon? or at least implied canon?

Sense8 as some people have mentioned has 1 officially confirmed to be canon throuple, 1 that has a lot of hints to confirm but a lot of ppl see it as a gay couple w a very supportive friend ig and someone else said in general because of the plot u could kind of see the 8 of them as a big polycule, although that one isnt canon

HoneyWorks/Heroine Tarumono is one of those songs turned novel turned anime. i dont think its confirmed canon but theres a lot of stuff pointing to the possibility, you mightve see @non-fantasy telling me about them in a few asks. im obsessed and ive yet to watch anything

Penumbra Podcast: Second Citadel has Rilla/Sir Damien/Lord Arum, i also haven't listened to this one but a lot of people told me rilla and damien were in a pre-established relstionship, both got crushed on lord arum separately, talked about it and worked things out to now be a canon polycule

im She-Ra (netflix) theres a trio that is implied to be a polycule at the end, a lot of ppl called them canon in the notes but i dont personally ember it being confirmed? i am very forgetful tho. It's Rogelio/Kyle/Lonnie, unfortunately they lost the prelim round

I believe people submitted some others that were canon but im very forgetful so i cant remember right now

[callmearcturus]

As the resident ITA hype person, I want to again say: you should listen to Into The Aether, a Lowkey Video Game Podcast.

I have listened to at this point a hundred media/hobby podcasts and dozens of video game-specific podcasts, and ITA is the best one. It's just the best one! I'm so glad to be the person to tell you this.

The entire conceit of ITA is that: this is a podcast that celebrates games and is built on love of games. The hosts only bring games to the show they enjoyed or found interesting. There is zero "let's talk about how bad this game is for 45 minutes."

HOWEVER, and this is the secret sauce of ITA to me, is a focus on positivity does not mean putting on blinders. Brendon and Stephen are super aware of the troubles of the games industry, of the continued crunch on the developers and creators, and... look, sometimes you enjoy a game and bring it to the show but also you can point out when it does something kinda terrible.

That is half of why I love ITA, that it can accentuate the positive without erasing the negative. And this show is like the standard-bearer for "A 6-out-of-10 game is more interesting than a 10-out-of-10 game." These are the guys.

The other reason I love ITA is their focus is timeless. If there is anything ITA should be Known For, it is they will play anything and don't really care about release calendars. Yeah, they will play the Big Event Games when they come out, like Elden Ring or TOTK or whatever, but they have a MASSIVE focus on older systems and older games.

To that end: their Season Four premiere episode was a full retrospective on the Game Boy Advance and its entire library. Since then, they have continued this tradition, spending months playing through the catalog of a single console and then opening each season with a huge episode focused just on that console. To date, they have done Game Boy Advanced, Nintendo DS, Sega Dreamcast, and today the Nintendo Gamecube.

(They also have a patrons-only retrospective on the Nintendo 3DS which IS worth the price of admissions, I promise.)

There's a lot of other reasons to love ITA.

The hosts are very conscious of burnout and their mental health and have now made it a tradition to take a few weeks off in the summertime before the season premieres. This last Summer Vacation, they did a special set of episodes hosted by their fabulous producer AJ in which they invited people onto the show to discuss different aspects of the games industry and those episodes were FASCINATING and excellent.

Stephen is a hardcore Theatre Kid Soul (who didn't get to do much Theatre, long story) and has the weirdest outbursts and bits that have had me in stitches.

Brendon has, over the course of ITA, gone from a person who doesn't like RPGs into a massive RPG fan, and watching that journey happen is really nice.

They explicitly will give games a second chance; they both bounced off Golden Sun during their GBA Retrospective and have been recently replaying it and enjoying it much more.

The original pitch of the podcast was "Stephen and Brendon try not to talk about The Elder Scrolls: Morrowind." The frequency at which they fail this is amazing.

They are currently trying to get into visual novels/dating sims and are huge fans of Tokimeki Memorial. The confidence with which Brendon can drop "Boku No Natsuyasumi" in conversation is Indicative of something. IYKYK.

Due to the lack of focus on what's Hip And Recent, the episodes have an uncommonly timeless feeling. Diving into the backlog is really fun.

The Season Seven Premiere is over the Nintendo Gamecube. It's a great place to start. I will also just list a few episodes I love off the dome.

Pokémon Crystal Bonus: as someone who has always loved Silver/Gold without having the language for why, this episode helped nailed down why. HUGE fan.

Berethor & NotGimli Are Dead: THE STORY OF THE LOTR GAME IS JUST GREAT.

Pretty Good Statham: FINALLY someone talking about the Playdate, yessss

Pigma's Allegory of the Cave: just an average episode but I remember really loving the Tetris Effect/REZ discussion.

X-Strike Summer 1: Break Glass in Case of Bandicoot: the first of the guest episodes that features a group of people with very different jobs in the games industry and have VERY interesting perspectives. HUGELY rec.

An Introduction to the Sega Dreamcast: Originally a patron-only episode but I was one of many ppl who yelled "PUT IT ON THE MAIN FEED" and you're all welcome! This episode features guest star Chris Plante (Polygon EIC) guiding the boys through the history of the Dreamcast. It's both a fascinating piece of history and also has a Plot Twist that uh. It... made me cry? Yeah.

I could keep scrolling back more but I think you all get the picture. ITA is the best game podcast. Please give it a shot.

[otherworldy-insect]

i already yapped abt this au on this blog (expect me to start hyperfixatimg) BUT eurghhg lemme explain this au ONE MORE TIME because i love to infordumo… hrhghgho (also so all of the current info abt my au is all in one post so it’s easier to understand)

so erm instead of being a creation of ganondorf, mucktorock/morcka is actually a follower of him, as well as the other temple bosses. i might expand on why morcka (since it’s not a creation of ganon i feel like giving it a name would be cool ig) is but for now let’s just say it joined for the evil doings (SO SCARY 😨😨)anyways morcka still has its icky yucky sludge powers ofc, everything’s mainly the same except for its shark form. it resembles a zora bc i fucking had to lol. but i imagine morcka would wear its disguise as a weird ass bodysuit and stuff, also small tad tiny weeny little fun fact, morcka is usually in its shark from even when it doesn’t need it (especially around the other temple guardians) it does this because it’s short as hell and is very pissed about that.

anyways the regional phenomena was able to happen cus morcka was told to steal the secret stone of water by ganondorf, so ofc it did because it was evil. this resulted in the secret stone becoming corrupted, since morcka had been hanging out with ganondorf so much it actually became a source of corruption. this also resulted in morcka’s sludge powers amplifying to the point that its powers could affect a whole fucking region , though not that much because of the initial corruption. anyways yada yada yada and link beats the shit out of morcka with sidon, and morcka fucking dies, and the two take the secret stone back and purify it. however morcka is resseructed by the blood moon, and ends up in the depths. this causes it to have “scars” (more like its wounds being patched up by gloom), and stuff. idk

also side thing, i made a separate au back where it was the ganon blights that were the same species of their champions and were ALSO followers of calamity ganon , instead of being creations of him (idk i thought zora waterblight would be cool…) i kinda abandoned that au, and recycled it into this lol. BUT i wanted a way to bring that au back, so i thought of making it again but NO @master-kohga-dating-sim CAME UP WITH THIS GODAMN IDEA /pos

im probably going to actually make the blights their parents, but idk. but it seems like a really cool idea!!!! (also so i could make this lmao)

anyways credit to @kollieflower for the inspo!!!!! and @master-kohga-dating-sim for the potential idea!!!!

(EDIT: THIS IS OLD AS HELL I FUCKIMG HATE THIS??)

[crazylittlejester]

ive finally decided. each slugcat that goes with each member of the chain

now i originally panicked thinking "oh fuck theres only 9 and inv would horribly mischaracterize whoever i threw them with because theyre basically just known as the dating sim one what do i do" (for context the dating sim is a feature added once you finish inv's campaign as a joke) but then i remembered the watchers existence so everything is great

oh yeah i threw the chart of them with each slugcat and the color i associate each one with at the bottom, and the slugcats themselves !! :)

Four is Monk because I just think it fits, a silly little guy, so why not?? (i secretly didnt know who would fit him and monk seemed like the best choice)

Hyrule is Survivor because Survivor is the sort of the mascot of Rainworlds AND everyone is based on their design, which is kinda what I see Hyrule as!!

Twilight is Hunter because Hunter's campaign is fairly hard,, atleast for a newgen ☹️ i got killed by like every monster and that reminded me how when i started playing twilight princess i gave up on the top of the castle because the birds kept killing me.

Wild is Gourmand because Gourmand can mix food and it gives him an extra food pip, which sorta relates to how Wild can cook food and its more hearts than the ingredients mixed in it are

Legend is Artificer because both are more closed off due to trauma of losing people they love </3 they could never make me hate you Artificer (shes been one of my favs since last year (i drew ship art of her and hunter to annoy my friend once as a joke even if the two characters NEVER MET and then i became an artificer fan LMAO))

Wind is Rivulet because.. well ive already yapped to you about this but Rivulet and Wind are kinda.. both already water related in their stories but also both care about the people they love!! Rivulet considers the character Looks to the Moon as their mom and their campaign is basically just helping her and Wind saves his sister in Wind Waker :3

Sky is Spearmaster because Spearmaster has a special ability of holding two spears, which i just think is cool and i was like "huh sky was kinda the one who helped forge the master sword (correct me if im wrong LMAO)" but also comes with a downside because.. Spearmaster cannot eat normally. they have to use the spikes they form from their tail to drain the nutrients out of creatures ☹️

Time is Saint for ACTUALLY THE PERFECT REASON???? basically once you reach karma 10 (im not 100% sure what karma even is but its earned through playing the game) you become a god and have the ability to kill everything with one hit (compared to before where you couldnt even pick up a spear) but when you ascend and end the campaign you end up in the same place as before, restarting the cycle.

Warriors is *checks notes.* thats? not a released character yet thats an upcoming DLC- who cares hes The Watcher/Nightcat because they technically arent canon outside of arena yet and haha thats like battling. hyrule warriors is battling mainly. see it matches it matches it fits its fits,,!! (ignore how their picture is their marketable plushie they have no canon illustration outside of arena icon yet)

NOBODY GETS INV.

heh... the yapping.. its over 🔥 i spent like 20 minutes on this. :3

tumblr please dont snack on this i hid a knife in it itll hurt☹️!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THEYRE ALL SO FUNKY LOOKIN THANKS FOR INCLUDING THE IMAGES. IM FUCKIN OBSESSED WITH THEM

i genuinely appreciate the amount of time you put into this dude, i may not really understand all of it but I’m absolutely fucking eating it up

[beeftony]

On top of being an excellent comedy/romance isekai, I’m In Love with the Villainess is a really good allegory for a particular form of media engagement, specifically the way queer people in general but especially lesbians engage with media. What separates it from a lot of other isekai is that Rae’s power (aside from the ones that the protagonist of her favorite game already has) is that she knows how the story is supposed to go. She knows how it’s supposed to end for Claire, and she is willing to do anything to change it.

Think about the space Claire occupies in the narrative of the game prior to when Rae awakens as its protagonist. She’s an act 1 bully with some incidental scenes who gets her comeuppance later on, but the story isn’t supposed to be about her. But there’s something about her that Rae feels a connection to, something that kept her going until she died from overwork and woke up in a world where she knew all the rules. And rather than use that meta knowledge to make herself the ultimate mary sue of the story (which the character she’s reborn as kinda already was), she devotes herself to someone that the creators of the game never put much thought into, but who means the world to her.

A lot of us have forged that kind of connection with at least one character who got shafted by the narrative, who keeps us coming back even when the story they’re trapped in doesn’t hold any other appeal. Rae obsessively played a dating sim up until the moment she died when she explicitly has no interest in any of the actual romance options, just to catch glimpses of a girl she felt deserved a better ending to her story. So she decides to give her one.

Idk I just think it’s a pretty neat metaphor for the transformative power of fandom and how it lets us draw more meaning from a story than its creators intended.

[colorisbyshe]

June Monthly Music: Half Way Through Edition

Music released before June 13th because WOW this month is stacked and this post is already this big this early!

Kaytranada came out with a new album--"Wasted Words (ft Thundercat)" has hilarious lyrics, "Weird (ft Durand Bernarr)" scratches an itch if you miss Azealia's vocalizations but can't listen to her for obv reasons, "Snap My Fingers (ft Pinkpantheress)" is bouncy and sweet, and "Still (ft Charlotte Day Wilson)" is a pleasant ache of a song. Not a groundbreaking album but reliable and solid.

"Drip Sweat" is my fave off that album, which is why it gets its own line. Very hypnotic, like being tugged into a dark corner at the club for some privacy.

After years away, Foster the People are back with a whole entire new sound. "Lost in Space" is... confusing at first but it kinda makes me think of Katamari Damacy... so I like it. I do not know if it's good, I am prejudiced. (Supermodel was one of my fave albums of all time.)

If you enjoy music from The Sims, yes, the game, give "Open World" by Toconoma a shot. A bit funkier, less perfect for constant looping but it's a purely instrumental song capable of invoking the same joy as booting up the game and hearing creation mode.

NGL, the singles were bangers, but I kinda feel... underwhelmed by the Charli XCX album (didn't think it was bad, just overhyped) but of the new tracks I really dug "Sympathy is a Knife," "Talk Talk," and "365." Bonus tracks are fun tho, "Springbreakers" is my fave.

Raveena's collab wiith JPEGMAFIA, "Junebug," is a sprawling river of champagne through a land of glistening sands and bubbling clouds.

"New Way Out" by Poppy is for those of you who want a song that feels like a re-imagining of Evanescence's "Going Under" by BMTH.

"Balloon in Love" by Sunmi is... cute. I love Sunmi but it's just fine. Worth a try.

"I Am the King" Fat Dog. This track FEELS like an interlude but in a way that makes you feel transient as well. Time is escaping, this song is escaping, you are escaping.

Peggy Gou released her first album and while none of it is as classic as her earlier track, "Starry Night," I do think if you like groovy dance music, "1+1=1," "All that (ft Villano Antillano), and "I Believe in Love Again" are worth checking out!

BREE RUNWAY IS BACK! "JUST LIKE THAT" IS WAY TOO SHORT BUT IF YOU LIKE MISSY ELLIOT, CHECK OUT THIS ELECTRIFYING TRACK.

"She a Wolf" Wayv. Fuck SM but this track does kinda go off. This is a song that would be fun as hell in an arena setting.

Glass Animal's "A Tear in Space" is a massive improvement over the lead single for their upcoming album. Still a step below their older stuff but if you were scared off from the last single, maybe give the a second chance.

"MPH" Doechii. High energy and it is, in fact, givin 'em cunt.

Music I vibed with this month regardless of release date:

"Good Club" Prince Club. Deep house track.

"The Feeding" Real Farmer. Punk, indie rock.

"The Bitch" Basic Element. I laugh-cry at the lyrics every time.

"Moonraker" Enth. Anime-ass song. Fun Jrock that you can imagine an anime character running through grass to.

"Opheliac" Emilie Autumn. Not for everyone but it was for me in middle school <3

"Jaded" Spiritbox. If you liked the Poppy track, come here.

"Make Love" Daft Punk. Transcendent.

NOW ITS YOUR TURN CAN SOMEONE RECOMMEND ME NON-ENGLISH MUSIC, PREFERABLY NOT KPOP (I LISTEN TO ENOUGH DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME)

Any genre works besides like... ballads... or screamo without a balancing melodic voice in the mix. Please. Anons, replies, whatever welcome

[epithetical]

2024 UPDATE (OFFICIAL)

Hey, everyone. Longtime no talk. Despite being weirdly active on this account, I haven't really made any textposts since high school. So I've decided to fix this by giving a gigantic update post about my very busy 2023. If you're new and don't know anything about me, or knew me as a teen and are wondering what I'm up to now: buckle up.

TL;DR:

Dropped out of art school. Released an award-nominated(???) dating sim, ValiDate. Killed the Golden Girls Take Manhattan DX. Conquered Jaw Explosion Disease. Hung out with some friends. (Also, a lot of NDA shit that I can’t talk about.)

ART-SCHOOL DROPOUT

From 2021 to 2022, I was attending a prestigious and overly-expensive art school for their (brand new!) game design program. When I first graduated from high school, this college was my dream choice, and coming off the success of my early game dev career, it seemed like a perfect opportunity to polish my skills while I kept working on the side. My first commercial game was still in development, but we were feeling comfortable, and I felt like getting greedy.

Pride before the fall. Full Icarus mode. You know how it goes.

The school itself was…alright. Satellite campus, mid-pandemic, hybrid learning. Close enough to commute comfortably, classes just long enough for masks to not give me a headache, and the handful of remote courses helped keep my medical problems at bay. Problems that the school was a little unequipped to help with, though the disability office did their best. I had to drop a class because my body, at the time, couldn’t handle eight hours of classes without some Crazy Side Effects. 

(Keep in mind that every class was, minimum, four hours. And I had to take at least five a semester. Each class also saw me make an entire game from scratch. My body was already at its limit.)

If you knew me in high school, you’re probably waiting for the shoe to drop: I was, famously, the worst at academics. Never did homework, rarely finished projects, slept through first period at least once a week. Surprise, though: I was fucking great at this. My GPA doubled. Turns out that going to school for a discipline you already have a career in, and are kinda obsessed with, kinda does wonders for you. Unfortunately, I picked the worst time to care about school, since my commercial game’s release was the same exact night that my five school games were due.

TL;DR, I didn’t sleep for a week, almost fucked both up, and got burnout so bad that I couldn’t do anything for a calendar year. So I dropped out! Now, about a year of job hunting later (the game’s industry is imploding right now, and the only studios that considered me were… questionable, to say the least), the expensive art school wants me back. So badly. Turns out the whole school is so broke and understaffed right now that they’re basically chomping at the bit for that tuition money. Got a week to decide. Jury’s still out.

VALIDATE POST-MORTEM

So, if you couldn’t tell from the above section, we released a game in 2022!  I was supposed to write a post-mortem for it, but… burnout from the above, combined with general “post-release depression,” and I didn’t feel like touching it. 

Part of me still doesn’t! 

Yet I kinda think the feeling of me not wanting to talk about ValiDate is still worth discussing, so here we go:

For those of you that aren’t aware, I was a head dev on ValiDate, a dating sim that released in 2022. Volume 1 (of 3) did, anyway.

Did a lot of music, did a lot of writing, created some characters people really care about, created some characters people really want to fuck, made a couple Tweets that my boss hated, got accused of being reverse racist a few times. It was truly one of the most exciting and rewarding experiences of my life. And, yes, we’re still working on Vol. 2 behind the scenes. 

That’s actually the reason why it’s kinda hard to talk about Vol. 1!

It was my first commercial game, my first publicly released game, and I think there’s always gonna be a… natural embarrassment toward your first “real” project. Combine that with my natural “if you stare at me for too long, I will kill myself” tendencies, and the game’s release was a special type of torture. It’s one thing to watch people play through a game that you poured your blood, sweat, and tears into, knowing full well that they might hate it (or just misunderstand it), but shit gets so much worse when you know that you could have done better. 

It’s a very special kind of psychological torture to have creative decisions you feel were mistakes, things you half-assed because of burnout or deadlines, or things you did wrong because you just didn’t know any better! The embarrassment was overwhelming, so I just… dipped for a while. Didn’t watch gameplay or read reviews, didn’t do much of anything.

Took me a while to realize that me being embarrassed about the project isn’t because ValiDate was bad or anything. I was embarrassed because it was an incredible learning opportunity for me. The amount that I picked up on game design, community management, leadership, marketing, pitching, porting, etc. in two years is more than any school could teach you in four. Volume 1 was a game made by amateurs, still wet behind the ears, trying to build something from grassroots. 

But Volume 2 is a game-ass game. 

And having done all the work we have on Vol. 2 (which, while I can’t talk about it publicly, is a lot!), looking back at our first release feels like… revisiting your awkward middle school photos. Sometimes it’s hard to not feel contempt for who you were when your biggest struggle was becoming, but learning to choke down that shame? It taught me to feel grateful for the you of yesterday, who clawed their way through uncertainty so that you, today, can stand on sturdier ground. Growing up is embarrassing, and it turns out you keep doing it well into your twenties! Sucks. 

For the past few days, Dani and I have been watching a Twitch streamer play through Volume 1. We’ve been so deep in planning for the future that we figured, hey, may as well revisit the past. Detached from all that embarrassment of becoming, I gotta admit: we made a fun little dating sim. People like it. Hell, I like it. Sure, I know all of its flaws and shortcuts, and I have my fair share of critiques… but fact of the matter is, if I have a problem with something, I can just fix it. 

Admittedly, In the past, that attitude of mine has actually been more of a problem than a solution. “I can fix this myself!” is all fine and good when you’re a solo dev trying to throw something together, but it turns out taking on excess responsibility in a collaborative setting is a way to make shit suck for you and your team. During the Kickstarter demo era, I was literally on every team besides art. Writing, programming, music, I got my fingers in all those pies. It was fun to me, and more importantly, it was sustainable. 

Until it wasn’t.

Volume 1 coinciding with my tenure at [art school], using a (finicky and, frankly, shitty) new game engine, being much larger in scope, introducing minigames (which, surprise, I was team lead on)... I pretty much killed myself trying to get it all done. Honestly, I blame half of our day-one bugfixes on me specifically. Every single one of them was an oversight made because I was pulling the classic “I’m unmedicated so crunching is the only way I can feel alive” type shit. 

Except for the OST. That one sucked because art school sucks all the joy out of creating.

Happy to say that our workflow for Volume 2 has been much more sustainable for me, even if I’ve officially broken my “no art” rule for it. Yeah, turns out I’m finally making use of that animation major. Sucks.

Self reflection over. Except for one last note:

If you’ve followed ValiDate, played our demo, donated to the Kickstarter, replied to our Tweets, played our second demo, bought our game, or just talked about us to a friend… I am so, so grateful. Beyond what words could possibly describe. It’s been my dream for as long as I can remember become a game developer, and I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you guys. Vd8 wasn’t what I expected the cornerstone of my career to be, but honestly? I couldn’t have asked for a better one. We have Vriska in our game. How many people can possibly say that?

And to those of you still waiting for Volume 2:

You haven’t seen anything yet.

GAYMING AWARDS

Speaking of ValiDate… Did you hear we were nominated for some Gayming Awards last year? We were! 

Three other head Vd8 devs (Dani: Production, Alexis: Art, Cam: Code) flew out to beautiful New York City for the award show last March, which was actually our first time actually meeting up IRL. Really funny how I’ve known Dani since I was fifteen, but here we were, a decade later, finally meeting face to face. She’s so much taller in person. I’m still taller, but barely.

Meeting up with internet friends is one thing (and more on that later!), but meeting up with internet coworkers? It’s interesting. This was the first moment that ValiDate felt “real,” seeing as it was suddenly important enough to give us comp’d flights and a hotel room, but more than that: the people I’ve been working with for years exist? We’re all hanging out together? We’re wandering through Manhattan all day? We’re eating the most disgusting food at Junior’s in Times Square? We’re trying to figure out what this mystery liquid is? How much did this food cost again? (Seriously, my onion rings were 90% dough and 10% onion.)

While I won’t bore you with the minutiae—I think my friends would prefer the privacy anyway—the entire trip to NYC was fun, exhausting, and a dream-come-true.

Except for that goddamn award show. Jesus CHRIST, what a trainwreck.

No, I’m not saying that just because we lost. We did lose, though. (Personally, I was fine with it, but I also had to travel the least distance to get there. So…) I’m saying that because the entire Gayming Awards industrial complex was, uh, kinda busted this year?

So imagine, you’re us: bunch of twenty-somethings on your Sex and the City shit. Big award show tonight, formal attire. We’re talking high heels, long dresses, full suits, the whole nine yards. Now what do you do in Manhattan? Walk. Sure, we weren’t walking in formal attire the entire time, but it was still a good five blocks to the award center where—wait, what do you mean they relocated the ceremony? The hall they rented is closed for mysterious reasons? Where the hell are we doing the award show?

If you answered “the drag bar where the afterparty was supposed to take place,” congrats, here’s $20. Way further away from our hotel, which meant more walking, and also a way smaller venue with a lot less… formality, let’s say. But we’re young gay people, we don’t care about formalities, who gives a shit! As long as it can seat all of us, then—oh there’s no seating. Ohhhh. Oh! Okay.

I’ll admit, that’s a bit of an exaggeration. There were a handful of couches, VIPs only. Realizing quickly that, oh shit, we’re VIPs, we managed to snag some front-seat couches before any of the pesky old people could. (We’re young! We deserve to sit! You’ve had your entire lives to sit, established games industry people! Let the new generation have a turn!) Unfortunately, when I got up to cash in my free-drink voucher, my seat was stolen by some white lady. 

So I sat on the floor.

March 2023. You, sitting at home, have decided to tune into the Gayming Awards “live” on Twitch, curious to see what Britain’s premiere gayming magazine had to say about, uh, esports. 

This is important to you. 

Fortunately, this year you’re watching a decently shot and scripted award show filmed in a (noticeably claustrophobic) little bar, complete with charming presenters (many of whom are local drag queens) and a myriad of corporate sponsors. You can hardly tell that the entire show was uprooted and moved hours prior!

Yet, for some reason, whenever the cameras cut to the audience… There’s some large man, right in front of the crowd, slumped down on the floor as if he’s bleeding out. With every award given, his clapping grows weaker. The more the camera cuts to him, the more life drains from his body, as if his existence itself is anathema to “gayming.”

Imagine, for a moment, that this man is nominated for an award. 

Imagine that he, after a lifetime of potassium deficiency, has been teetering on the edge of a Charlie Horse Reckoning for hours.

Imagine that the microsecond that his game’s name is called as a nominee, the Reckoning begins. 

Now imagine a world where he wins that award. 

A world where he is forced to stand—from his corpse’s rightful place on the ground!—in front of his peers and superiors, pretending as if he’s not afflicted with a life-ending muscle cramp.

So, yeah. I was pretty fine with losing.

Later, we ditched the “afterparty” to drink at Applebees. (Turns out “green tea shots” don’t have any green tea in ‘em?)

EULOGY FOR THE GOLDEN GIRLS TAKE MANHATTAN DX

Big announcement! I was a team lead on The Golden Girls Take Manhattan DX, a certified Tumblr Gold™ fan-project (by the immortal Grawly) about the eponymous Gold Girls in a Persona-esque parody game! 

Slightly bigger announcement! The game got cancelled. Sorry.

Feels a little weird talking about this, since the year-ish I spent working on the game passed in the blink of an eye, and I’m not going to lie and say that I was an instrumental piece of the team or whatever. I was lucky enough to lead a very talented team, and to play with some very fun devtools, but the game was definitely more important to me than I was to it. (Grawly, if by some off-chance you’re reading this, please click off now. You can peek back in at the Jaw Explosion Disease subheader. I promise I’m very nice and respectful.)

I was in high school when I was first made aware of TGGTMDX. My friend group was very into Persona (in the pre-P5 days), and one of our favorite video subgenres was “videogame UI on top of sitcom scenes.” It didn’t take us long to stumble onto early-build footage of TGGTMDX on Tumblr, and what spawned was a years-long fascination. I’d even consider it one of my many… game dev awakenings? The idea that the only thing stopping me from making “American Persona”—one of my many white whales—was commitment to the bit. Just one of the many things that fueled my teenaged suicidal overconfidence.

Speaking of suicidal overconfidence, about a decade later, I was invited to work on the game! Coming fresh off ValiDate, I was desperate for a chance to make a real portfolio piece (visual novels, while popular, will never get you a job), and this sort of opportunity only presents itself once in a lifetime. Fulfilling a teenage dream while furthering your career? What could possibly go wrong!

That makes it seem like there was some explosive drama behind the scenes that ruined everything. Sorry to say that most game cancellations aren’t that exciting, and that this game’s death was by a thousand microscopic cuts. Most of which are not my place to talk about: this game wasn’t my baby, and cancelling it wasn’t my choice to make! Many people worked on this for much, much longer than I even knew how to code, and they deserve to have their feelings prioritized. Whenever that post mortem gets published, I’ll be the first to reblog it, trust me. 

Instead, I’d prefer to talk a little about this as being my first real “loss” as a game dev. Certainly not my first project to go under, and I’ve had my fair share of shelved prototypes, but something about this cancellation was… different. Working on your dream project is all fun and games until you feel partially responsible for it dying, y’know? It felt Sisyphean at a point, like trying to dig a hole in the sand with a pitchfork. I would work at the game, and work at the game, but nothing I did felt like it made a dent. 

Part of me knew I wasn’t giving it my all, between the school-based burnout (above), jaw explosion disease (below), and ValiDate (omnipresent), it’s not like I could’ve afforded to put more of myself into it. Besides, I was literally a team lead, half my job was telling other people what to do. But the spectre of “you’re not doing enough” was hard to shake. Even when all these other responsibilities ebbed and I could afford to give this game my all, the difference felt minimal. 

We spend a lot of time pitying Sisyphus for having to push that boulder uphill over and over, but none of us ask ourselves “could we even move that big fucking rock in the first place?” Apparently, I couldn’t.

I wasn’t the only one that felt that way, it turned out. In fact, pretty much all the friends I made on the project felt the same. If there’s any “real” reason why the project got cancelled, it’s that. No big falling out, Disney didn’t give us a cease and desist, no secret rebrand going on in the background. Just a bunch of lads getting sick of pushing a boulder. Hell, Grawly’s been doing it for a decade. Let him rest.

Not too much rest, though: we’re already working on a different game together (Date Knight: check it out if you haven’t!), and some of us ex-Golden Girls devs have some ideas for what else we can cook up. 

For money, this time.

JAW EXPLOSION DISEASE

Probably the biggest “development” of 2023 was my sudden horrible nerve pain in July, which started as a sinus infection on the left side of my face, and soon became a horrific jaw pain. Long after my sinus infection healed, the jaw pain remained, which is a pretty bad hand to draw when a considerable portion of your day is spent “talking,” or “eating.” So, for the back half of 2023, I didn’t do much of either.

Instead, I had to take a considerable amount of ibuprofen, visit one doctor, three dentists, two hospitals, and four oral surgeons to figure out what the hell is wrong with me. The dentists discovered an exposed nerve, caused by wisdom tooth removal complications (sick!), the oral surgeons went “okay, we can fix that,” got me all numbed up. But it turns out that my left jaw is immune to local anesthesia! Thinking this was an infection, they kept putting me on antibiotics over and over in the hopes that it’d suddenly work. Took a note from my childhood dentist explaining that, “no, he’s always been like this” to find a surgeon willing to put me all the way under. (And then, the first time they tried, I woke up in the middle anyway! I got a full refund on the copay, at least.) 

Ultimately, I found a very nice surgeon in December that treated me same-day, and did it perfectly, but the damage to my liver from all that ibuprofen was… bad. But it turns out that livers just… regenerate naturally? So, give it a few months, I’ll be at 100%. Hopefully.

OOMFCON

Hilariously, six months after we met up for the Gayming Awards, Dani and Alexis found their way back to NYC for a little combination meet-up/vacation we affectionately titled “Oomfcon 2023.” This time, with bonus friends! Our entire friend server, whose name I’ve been advised not to post publicly, had rented an AirBnB for anyone willing to drop everything and go to Brooklyn. 

It took about a year of planning (mostly by Alexis) to get us all out there, but Jesus Christ, it actually worked.

Admittedly I’m a bit hesitant to talk at length about “taking a vacation”—even though I’m already… from here?—but it really was the highlight of my year. First for actually happening, when most friend groups I’ve had would have written the idea off as a pipedream, but mostly for being a really good time. A lot of walking, a lot of talking, a lot of drinking, a lot of dining. (This was during Jaw Explosion Disease, so you can imagine how my body took most of that.)

To Dani, Alexis, Miles, Haven, Grim, Xtine, and Ty: thanks for coming up here! The city is a lot more boring without you guys in it. I promise to have less health issues when we do this again!

And to everyone else outside the groupchat that I met and bored with my job hunt stories: Nice meeting you guys! Sorry that fate decided every single one of you is forced to keep in touch with me. (And I didn’t even get the shitty corporate job!)