#its hilarious guys i swear
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Warriors the Musical is so silly
'cuz wdym Eliza Hamilton got murdered by the police and gets replaced by Eliza Hamilton who then kisses Maria Reynolds
#musicallypan#warriors#the warriors#warriors album#the warriors album#warriors the musical#the warriors the musical#warriors concept album#the warriors concept album#warriors musical#the warriors musical#warriors mercy#the warriors mercy#warriors fox#the warriors fox#warriors swan#the warriors swan#mercy warriors#fox warriors#swan warriors#lmm#eisa daviz#swercy#swancy#swan x mercy#mercy x swan#eliza hamilton#maria reynolds#its hilarious guys i swear
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Nothing will ever be as gay as a straight man talking about Robert Baratheon
#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#asoiaf fandom#valyrianscrolls#robert baratheon#baratheon#they are having GLAZING competitions with ned#“every young maidens dream”#wdym maiden#literally you#yk men have a crush on a guy when they cast henry cavill as a faceclaim#'prime robert' and i swear thats their wet dream#their fav dreams about a pretty dude with long hair and confirmed facecard everyday#everytime i see a prime robert male fan its like getting a glimpse of modern au ned#this is obviously a joke#but...#“godssss he was strong then🤤”#hilarious#unhinged#love it#live your truth but know your destination#roberts rebellion
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Warning for: The (spider) legs showing below!
Under the hoodie/layers, she tends to wrap her legs around her kinda like a hug! And so in the first part that's the weird bumps under the hoodie. They're starting to unravel a bit. She hates being called a monkey cause it's NOT her fault she's short and has to climb on things and up things and includes people in "things" category.
#my characters#911 and 810 and 666 (Satan) are all just agents and everyone except 911 has an odd feature of sorts#such as her spider legs and 666s tail and 343s eye on her chest and so on#they just go by their assigned numbers usually until 666 overheard 911 talking on the phone and heard him say#yeah yeah its eric sorry for a new number again#bc he tends to get new phone numbers for secret keeping reasons#but he has to call his parent to check on em! so hes like yup its me! that guy with an actual name!#and 666 is like oh thats hilarious and starts to call him Prince (since he likes to sing a lot and also prince eric sooo)#and in return to being dubbed prince he starts calling 666 satan#but! 810 and 666 become really good friends and she decides it might not be his name but its more personal than a number#so she adopts the teasing nickname as an affectionate nickname#also 911 is distinctly the only actual boring human amidst the group and he just keeps finding out about the others on accident#and then since he lives at HQ he starts to offer his very boring room up to his friends so they can strip down#and let the extra limbs or parts get some air#so hes constantly just walking into his own room and having 810 in her underwear face down on his bed with her legs out#and he sighs and goes about his day#hes kinda grateful 666 just lets his tail out and keeps his pants on most days but hes also walked into his room and#no pants only boxers tail out and flicking happily#so he just kinda counts it as a win for everyone if satan is happy (satan is the nicest of them lmao)#but yes! in the first part shes basically yelling shes gonna kill him she swears to her best friend#and 911 is like yeah ok thats scary please do NOT actually choke your human jungle gym lets just not do that actually thanks!#anyway sorry for the heap of tags i wont stop overall but i will for now ty for looking at my ocs
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the vibe we bring to the function
#they're up to no good fr#billy is scandalized but not by the murder#guys hear me out on sapphic stuilly this is going somewhere trust me#put down the pitchforks i swear its not the fumes#soft launch for yuri stuilly fic in the drafts rn#totally following canon (so unbelievably not canon its hilarious)#dazndoodraws#stuilly#stu macher#billy loomis#scream 1996#yeah this TOTALLY takes place in 1996 and not the summer of 1995#i said like a liar#tns1995#that tag is a surprise tool to help us later#butterbee#also a surprise tag ignore for now
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"Yes Cesar," We all say in unison.
(@mustangs-flames)
#PLEASE IM CACKLING#hail true body#shitpost#whatever you do do NOT go the HTB universe#guys I'm hilarious i swear please giggle at this#insert laugh track#drawing on MSPaint with a mouse is hard#htb mimic!cesar#htb cesar hernandez#I'm so chronically online its not even funny anymore😭#drew this instead of sleeping HAH take THAT#art#my art
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WHY ARE ALL ELLIE WILLIAMS WRITERS COQUETTE WHORES
#they’re all coquette guys i swear#LIKE IM NOTICING A PATTERN HERE#AND ITS FUCKING HILARIOUS#and perfect 😌#it’s literally the best 🤭#ellie williams#ellie williams smut
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new hyperfixation incoming
#ohio breaks the 4th wall#this is a reference to the post i made right before this#iykyk#i LOVE that game its actually so fun#i am also hilariously bad at it. so#my poor guy (connor) has died at i think every time it was possible for him and im playing on EASY#need need NEED someone else to play this game#the gameplay itself is amazing. the story has me in a chokehold. i love the characters. i love CONNOR#kara and alice and markus and hank are all also really amazing#im invested in like. every plotline...#kara is probably my second favorite character but markus is also really close to being tied with her#hank is interesting and i like him mostly for his dynamic with connor because I think theyre just hilarious in almost every interaction they#have. like i cant talk about specific ones without spoilers but like. if you know anything about this game you know what its like. and for#anyone who doesn't know- robot and guy who hates robots forced to work together. the robot is trying his best and the guy who hates robots#has a swearing problem#and as someone who finds swear words incredibly funny...#i feel the need to clarify i dont ship them but i think they should continue to be forced to work together until they eventually become some#sort of found family#like not exactly father and son but like... something else thats similar#anyways. sorry for so many ooc posts today im just losing it#love this game sm..........#dbh#detroit become human
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Keep wondering how one would go around reccing Joy of Life and I get to "historial cdrama isekai" then my brain shuts down
#here like wait no guys come back it's good I swear. there's plotting and inexplicable pop culture references#and it hides its heart until it can clock you over the head with how sincere it can be. mostly tho it's hilarious.#lowkey annoyed at myself tho bc I enjoyed season 1 but it didn't occupy my mind and then s2 just has me Contemplating#but I watched s1 several years ago so I need to rewatch it to try to tie certain plot and chara beats together in my head#jol
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the way people in my server talk about the outer wilds 'fandom' as if its some big thing that they have no control over when they are literally in a server with 120 people that is practically, the *entire* fandom they are talking about lmfao
#no shade at anyone but god its very funny to me#the way ppl complain about time buddies shipping as if time buddies shipping existed before a couple months ago#and wasnt a super unpopular ship because for some reason everyone thought gabbro was SO OLD#it took like i dont even know- 5 of us in total to make time buddies more popular as a ship? like you must understand heartbeats is an#outlier.. heartbeats is the spiders george of time buddies. there are definitely more hal/hatchy fics than time/buddies if you dont count#heartbeats i swear i swear i swear#anyway i dont blame you guys for complaining i just find it hilarious because i am definitely part of the problem
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it's even funnier if you play a circle mage that actually told Irving - then there are no stakes, Duncan just pulls the Conscription out of his ass. "Not so fast, kid, you are going to fight darkspawn, whether u like it or not"
every time the wardens do something fucked up i like them even more. this isn't about any game specifically but all of them. i fucking love the knockoff night's watch, i love that they guzzle nasty ichorous darkspawn blood that you'll die from 1) now or 2) in thirty years and how they don't tell their recruits until it's too late and the damage is done. i love their secrets and corruption and their heroism in the face of primordial darkness. i love warden leaders and warden recruits trying their best and the infighting that inevitably happens when they disagree.
#also fiona being hated by the wardens bcs she managed to get away from all this is hilarious#guys i swear i didnt do it on purpose!!!#but idk in all seriousness i love the fucking wardens#And then you listen to the grey wardens theme its so heroic and tragic at the same time
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Yess so glad to see more Sakamoto days fans 😏 may I request some Nagumo headcanons with him being in a relationship, kinda curious about how’d he be like in an argument with s/o
ೀ ׅ ۫ . YOICHI NAGUMO RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS ?
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SFW and NSFW under the cut!
n. i just recycled and elaborate the sfw ones from the asked i got from my 🎲 anon, added other things also. i love writing my stinky rascal . . hope u enjoy ^3^
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the dynamic in a relationship with nagumo will be natural & playful so it allows the relationship to develop organically. your relationship with him is built on a foundation of mutual understanding and subtle communication. instead of a formal confession, his consistent flirting and genuine expressions of affection serve as his way of showing his feelings.
his love languages would be heavy on physical touch, means that he expresses and receives love most profoundly through physical closeness and touch. accepts pda; in fact, he prefers to take the lead. never let him take his hands off of you, somehow. pulls you by the waist and gives you a nosy kiss. he enjoys spending quality time, although his profession occasionally prevents him from doing so. however, he will make the most of his time with you while it is available.
really clingy in private. won’t let you get out off the bed by hugging you from behind. he’s also the big spoon most of the time.
he talks in his sleep when he’s comfortable with you, murmuring about how much you mean to him and lazy smooches here and there. likes to pretend to be asleep as well so you continue to caress him in bed when he’s ‘asleep’.
traps you in a hug every single time. nagumo just comes out of nowhere to hug you, not letting you go, and says “caught youu” and carries you in bridal style around the house.
if you love his tattoos, he definitely walks around naked in the house. also, the sign that he truly trusts you with all his life is when he tells you the meaning of each tattoo he has.
put your belongings at the topmost shelf so you need to call him for help or hides your stuffs in the most random places ever.
you guys have board and card games around the house. monopoly? uno? guess who? snakes & ladders? just name it.
i’ve seen so many times others saying he loves to play pranks, i definitely agree. intentionally getting you on your nerves just for him to apologize with another set of pranks. he’s just silly like that.
contrarily to beliefs, he likes to mull over after you guys argue and gives you space as he rethinks and reflects his actions. when he apologizes after a big fight, he takes both of your hands and swings them left and right as he explains, still teases but with a nervous smile this time.
a flirt, teaser, prankster, drama queen, what else?
he MATCHES YOUR FREAK, did i tell you he’s a nasty in bed? one hell of an experimentalist, doesn’t mind doing anything with you. his rage is huge, i’ll tell you that. vanilla? roleplay? waxplay? pegging? all down, just name it.
quickies at inconvenient times. you guys have a meeting in 10 minutes? 4 minutes is enough to do your thing in the public bathroom together.
likes to steal glances to your tits when you guys talk. i believe he’s a tit guy rather than ass. though, in public, his hands tends to uncontrollably go down to your ass when he circles you by the waist.
too good at nipple play.
nagumo likes you make you squirt, his personal favorite. however, for him, he likes it when you give him a handjob.
talks & coos to your pussy likes its you!
in bed, he likes it when you go rough, i think it’s really going to turn him on. just ride him i swear. might be one of his best times in life.
crack jokes during it, he’s quite humorous doing sex. compliments you in a funny way and says hilarious things also. expect your sex won’t be too serious and just all laughs & giggles.
doesn’t give a fuck about bounds, so semi public and publix sex are often.
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@uzurakis
#.writing#sakamoto days#sakamoto days x you#sakamoto days x reader#nagumo sakamoto days#sakamoto days nagumo#sakadays nagumo x reader#sakadays x reader#sakadays#sakadays nagumo#nagumo x y/n#nagumo x you#nagumo x reader#nagumo yoichi#yoichi nagumo#nagumo yoichi x reader#yoichi nagumo x reader#nagumo fluff#nagumo smut
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PostOutbreak!Joel likes reader but he tries to hide it because of the age gap. To try and put us off, he can be a bit standoffish/mean but Ellie can tell it’s a facade and tells him to drop it and the age thing doesn’t matter if you really like each other. Then a fluffy confession omggg
Pairing: PostOutbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
Warnings: unspecified age gap, joel being a lil insecure and scared, and Ellie being a menace, but its mostly all fluff who am i kidding
a/n: this was the cutest fucking request ever, thank you anon
You know those books or movies where it's painfully clear to everyone but the two main characters that they love each other, and you keep reading or watching thinking "How could anyone not see that he likes her?" as you increasingly get more frustrated and annoyed?
Well, this is a bit like that,
not a bit actually, completely so.
And in this metaphor, you and Joel were the two oblivious main characters, while Ellie, poor Ellie, was the unfortunate witness of your blindness.
It was so incredibly clear to her that she sometimes struggled not to laugh at your interactions.
I mean the first time Joel saw you was the very first time she'd seen him blush and forget how to speak in the span of a second- it was hilarious.
And then when he'd catch him staring at you or pretend not to purposely take the longer route home just to catch a glimpse of you outside the bakery... it was hard to only chuckle underneath her breath, but she managed...
until today
Joel slammed the door as he got it, like really loud, not like his usual slam.
"what's wrong?" Ellie asked, her brows frowning in suspicion as he kicked his boots off his feet before halfheartedly dragging them to the kitchen where she was sitting.
"nothin'" he grumbled,
Now that made Ellie sigh with annoyance,
he was always the one to blab about how she could always confide in him, and if that was the truth, then that meant it went both ways.
"Y'know a grumpy old man once told me that it's good to share how you're feeling" She tilted her head to the side, raising her brow as Joel rolled his eyes, filling a glass with water "Would be real hypocritical of him to not take his own advice..."
Said old man, was now rolling his eyes even harder, drowning the full glass in a second
"'s nothing, don't worry 'bout it"
"Joel" Ellie only glared at him,
and as always when it was her,
he was convinced faster than he liked to admit
He sighed, before speaking "It's stupid" he said
"I don't care" Ellie shrugged, placing her elbows on the kitchen counter where she sat and using her hands to support her head, her whole focus on Joel,
who sighed, again.
"I just-" he placed the glass in the sink before turning back to her "I just saw y/n talking to I guy I-"
"Oh my god you're jealous!" she said it with such enthusiasm and with such a smile pulling at her lips that you would have guessed she'd just won the lottery
"no" Joel frowned, shaking his head "What are you on about? I'm not jealous, I just don't like the guy"
"yeah" Ellie snorted "I'm sure you just "don't like the guy"" she air quoted as she laughed
"Why would I be jealous?" Joel went on pretending,
perhaps lying to himself together with her, the jury was still out.
"I'm just worried for her-" he argued "she's too kind and too fucking nice and Jake's an asshole"
again, Ellie only smiled as she watched him lie so blatantly
"why would you be jealous?" she pondered his question with amusement "well I don't know... maybe 'cause you have the biggest fucking crush on her"
"What!?" he spat "I don't know what's going on with you today, where did you get all these ideas? I-"
"Oh my god please shut up Joel" she groaned, rolling her eyes "That rude asshole act you do around y/n may work with her, but you don't fool me, Miller"
Ellie could swear she saw a hint of panic in his eyes
"I know you like her, just like I know she likes you" She finally said, done with this little act "I honestly don't get why you two don't just declare your love to one another and live happily ever after or some shit"
It was like he froze,
and while Ellie thought it was because he'd just been busted by a 14-year-old, it was for a wholly different reason
"she doesn't like me" he stated
And at that, at that Ellie could just groan as her palm descended dramatically down the length of her face
God, she'd always known he wasn't the brightest, but this? This is a little too much even for him
"Are you blind or something?" she threw her hands out for emphasis "She's definitely better at hiding it than you, I'll give you that, but I mean, still... it's fucking obvious dude!"
"Ellie" Joel only shook his head "you 'don't know whatcha talkin' 'bout"
Ellie was now very close to yelling at him.
"Joel I'm serious, she likes likes you!" she argued, "why do you find that so hard to believe?"
But of course, Ellie couldn't have known what was going on in Joel's mind, how certain he was that it wasn't true,
about how he knew he didn't deserve someone like you, someone so kind and beautiful and smart,
how he had spent months trying to get the thought of you to leave his tainted mind,
how he'd decided to be mean, rough, rude to you in the hopes that you would stop being so nice to him, in the hopes that you would start to avoid him, to hate him, and he'd never have to see you or that gorgeous smile again.
And finally, Ellie didn't know about how he was too incredibly, terribly old for you, for such a pretty young woman.
Half his hair was gray for god's sake, he never had a chance
"I could be her father Ellie" he finally confessed what had been eating up at him for so long "I'm too fuckin' old"
Ellie didn't even need a moment to take that it, she listened, thought about it, and immediately rolled her eyes
"SO WHAT?"
You don't understand how long she had to pretend not to want to give the both of you a good shake,
it was only right for her to finally shout it out
"First of all, you're not that old" she started listing, "second of all, she obviously doesn't care" she continued "and finally Joel, if you really like her, and if she really likes you, then it doesn't matter!"
But Joel was not convinced, he'd spent too long telling himself the opposite, and he couldn't even fathom the possibility of what Ellie was saying
"you just have to tell her"
she said it like it was easy, like the mere thought of it didn't give Joel a minor heart attack, like he hadn't woken up from multiple dreams where he would confess his love and you would laugh at his face, or worse, tell him you felt the same, something Joel knew not to be the truth.
Also, Joel had no idea when exactly throughout this conversation he'd admitted to liking you, but I guess it didn't matter now, it made no sense to keep the farse on.
"I can't Ellie, I-"
"oh my god you're such a chicken" she moaned "You're the one that always tells me to be brave!"
"that's different"
"how!?" she bugged her eyes, holding her palms up in show of her frustration "I get that it's scary, but what's the worst thing that could happen?"
And that, for some reason, stuck with him,
He really had nothing to lose,
It's not like you were friends or you would talk often, it's not like he would be ruining a relationship, there wasn't one,
And yet... yet it still terrified him,
"Ellie... I don't know"
"c'mon man, but your big boy pants on" she groaned "I'm telling you, she fucking likes you"
__ __ __
Joel didn't do it.
He couldn't. He just-
You were perfect, you were perfect in a way that made him feel all the more dirty,
like being close to you, talking to you, touching you... would be like plucking a flower with torn-up hands,
And fuck him, but Joel was scared, like he'd gone back 40 years and become 16 all over again.
He couldn't do it, he couldn't, wouldn't do it, and he'd set his mind to that, made peace with his cowardness and dread.
Until of course, Ellie's twisted mind came up with a way to force his fears to life.
"Howdy"
The kid was smiling so broadly that she looked like a child with a brand-new toy,
but Joel's eyes were somewhere else,
he was looking at you
"Hi Joel" you smiled, punching a knife into his gut
You were at his front door with his kid, who was very clearly plotting something, and Joel wondered for a moment if this was what would finally make his heart give out.
"Hi," he said, his voice sounding distant
Why is she here?
"Aren't you gonna let us in?" Ellie urged,
Us?
"Uhm, I-"
but Ellie had already sneaked inside, dragging you behind
And now the awkward scene was even more awkward, just at the entrance of his home.
"All alright" Ellie clapped her hands, watching Joel stare at you as you tried to avoid his gaze "I'm gonna go to my room," she said, shouldering him not so subtly
"Cool down dude" she mumbled, before disappearing upstairs.
What the fuc-
"I'm sorry to barge in like this" you finally spoke, a gentle smile on your lips "Ellie said you needed to tell me something, so I just... came here I guess" you finished with an awkward laugh
Fuck-fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck-
"If it's too much trouble I'll just go-"
"no," Joel said, before he could stop himself, finally realizing he was still holding the door's knob, and in a spur of bravery, deciding to use it to close the door.
"Oh, ok" you mumbled, puzzled by his demeanor "so uhm, what is it you needed to tell me?"
God damn that fucking trick-playing kid of his
"do you- do you want something to drink?"
the question took you aback, but then you did something that stunned Joel even more, you laughed,
you laughed softly, quickly, like you were letting out all this stupid awkwardness in a simple gesture
because that's how you were: Magical
"Sure" you shrugged, grinning "some water would be nice"
If Joel had to watch your face for an instant more he feared he was gonna explode, so he did all he could think of, he walked to the kitchen, only glancing at you again when he handed you your drink,
to his dismay, finding a smile still drawn on your lips.
"thank you" you said, taking a sip
god, even the way your lips wrapped around the rim made him want to drop to his knees.
He needed to get a grip.
"so... are you gonna tell me or do I have to guess?" you joked, your fingers drawing patterns on the glass
Was this really happening?
Was this hell?
"I..." he trailed off, running a hand through his hair as he glanced from the counter to you on repeat "I wanted to tell you that..."
"that?"
"that- the uhm-" he shut his eyes for a second, searching for words "the...bread you gave us this week was real good"
Goddamnit
"oh"
Even you couldn't hide your disappointment
I mean, you certainly didn't expect it. A compliment from Joel Miller? What universe were you in?
Just like you didn't expect any of this... him actually letting you in his house or offering you water...
You had half expected him to shut the door in your face,
The most he had ever given you was a half smile at a joke you told him while he was picking up bread, the rest were all rude grumbles or just a bunch of stoic looks...
and yet... yet a part of you couldn't help but have set expectations a little higher.
What a silly fool you'd been,
hoping for a love confession from a man who has made it very clear he despises you,
but still- a girl can dream, right?
"thank you" you mumbled, as Joel cursed himself over and over in his head "that's very nice of you," you smiled, stalling a second to see if he was gonna say something else, interrupt you at some point,
but he remained silent
"well if that's all, I'm gonna go then, thank you for the water I-"
Until he wasn't
"no-stop- I-"
Ellie was right.
He had to do this, he had to win his fear and try at least, or he was gonna regret it for the rest of his life, and he already had too many of those.
The problem was that you looked really beautiful today, and he'd never been good with words
Fuck it- if he was gonna make a fool of himself so be it,
He had nothing to lose and everything to win,
he had you to win.
"Yes?" you asked, trying to tame your hopes down
Think Joel, think
how the fuck do you tell a woman you like her?
"There's one other thing I've been meaning to tell ya" he cleared his throat, standing up straighter as he took a step closer to you.
"'m not great at doing this type of thing" he admitted, shaking his head slightly "but Ellie... she's right, I'm always tellin' her to be brave and everythin', so... I guess it's my turn now," he said, letting out a short, anxious laugh "I don't even know- I guess what I'm tryna say is that I'm gonna be honest now, but I want you to know that- that I know what you're gonna say and it's ok" he swallowed thickly, preparing himself from your inevitable rejection "I understand, really, I just- I thought I should try at least"
What was going on?
What the fuck was he saying?
"Joel, what are you talking about?"
This was it.
It was now or never.
"Y/n I-"
his heart was beating out of his chest, and his legs felt like jelly, but he had to do it, he had to take a leap of faith-
"Y/n I like you" he breathed like the words longed to be out of his mouth "I like you a lot, I have for a while now"
he watched your mouth part, your whole face filling with shock as you blinked over and over, trying to make sure this was really happening.
"Y-you like me?"
"yes" he nodded "And as I said, I know you don't feel the same, I know I'm old, and I've been an asshole to you all this time, so it's ok, really I-"
"stop talking Joel" you huffed a laugh, stepping closer, and then closer again, until your hand was on his arm "please just-" you bit down a smile, and he was so confused, so fucking confused, "say it again," you asked
"I like you y/n" he murmured, trying to get his mind to start working again,
but you were leaning closer,
and who cared what his name was anyway
"you were rude to me"
"I was, I'm sorry I-"
You pretended to be thinking about it, glancing upwards as you pursed your lips together
But who were you kidding?
"you're forgiven" you smiled, looking up at him as you slowly raised yourself on your tiptoes to gently, oh so gently, press your lips to his.
Joel was certain he had just died.
But then he opened his eyes again, and you were still there, beaming up at him, and he felt such a wave of happiness that he could have started crying right there,
only he took on a different route and grabbed each side of your face with his hands, crashing his lips with yours and kissing you, kissing you like he'd been dreaming of for months
exactly how you imagined he would,
better than you imagined, actually
so much better.
"Ha! I told you, Joel!"
He groaned as he leaned away, shooting Ellie an annoyed glance
"What are you doin' here?"
"just came here to gloat" she shrugged, watching you two with a grin plastered on her face
"I think you've done enough of that" he muttered, but you could only smile
"thank you, Ellie," you grinned "Thank you for doing this"
She raised her brows, looking at Joel as if saying "See, she's thanking me, why aren't you?", but then her expression got more genuine as she shot you a smile
"you're welcome" she smiled "Better having to see you kiss than having to put up with Joel being all sad 'cause you're talking to Jack or any other guy"
You gasped with amusement as Joel shut his eyes in embarrassment, his cheeks tainting with red
"Ellie-" Joel grumbled,
A soft giggle flowed through the room as Ellie turned away and went back up to her room, seemingly satisfied with her work
"You were jealous?" you teased him, your hands on his chest, while he'd moved one of his from your face to your waist.
"maybe I was" he fessed up
You smiled even brighter
"And you like me?" you asked for the thousandth time
"yes, sweetheart, I really fuckin' like you" he smiled too now, his lips finding yours again in a kiss that made time stand still and the world spin around
"I like you too Joel" you finally said, giving the man an actual mini-stroke.
"say it again"
#sorry for not posting lately im not going through the best time at the moment#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller fluff#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fic#joel miller fanfic#joel miller x fem!reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x y/n#joel miller smut#joel miller x you#smut#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#fluff#joel miller imagine#joel miller blurb#joel miller angst#fanfiction#the last of us#tlou#the last of us hbo#tlou hbo#joel miller x f!reader
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Tumblr’s Core Prodct Stratgy
Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on trying to keep our sinking ship afloat for as long as possible. This means desperately trying to copy every new fly-by-night social media app that some multi-billionaire sh*t out during their daily Peloton routine. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. If you find the things we say here worrisome, please understand that is our exact intention. You've outgrown our target demographic. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.
The Diagnosis
It's lookin' pretty bad y'all!
After somehow losing hundreds of thousands of users during the great pr0n purge of 2018, we started to wonder if anything could be done to get back to where we were. We even brought in a management consultant who charged us a ridiculous amount of money. It would make you sick if you knew how much, but we got a few nice meals out of it at least. Anyhow, we handed this guy the app, and HE HAD NO IDEA HOW TO USE IT! It was f*cking hilarious! But suddenly it all clicked -- our users are a bunch of stupid idiots who can't even do basic arithmetic. I mean, they spend all day looking at their phones, so what do you expect?
Tumblr’s best feature is its unique content and vibrant communities. But who cares, right? We're just as happy getting traffic from people sh*t-posting memes, vague-booking, giving out-of-context hot takes to news events, and spewing whatever random thought is in their head at the moment. Plus that stuff doesn't p*ss off Apple.
To keep this thing going we need new people. And by "people" we mean teenagers, like we used to have back in the good ol' days. Unfortunately we're all in our 40s now, so we have no idea what they want. But teenagers are so cool! Imagine if they talked to us like we're one of them? We're getting hard just thinking about it.
Our Guidng Principls
To make Tumblr cool again, we must address these huge glaring issues.
People can look at a blog without logging in. How is that fair to all the poor schlubs who had to fill out forms to get an account? Also we haven't figured out a way to force ads onto the personalized pages yet. But we swear that's not the main reason.
People can see content they are looking for or linked to. People can keep up with blogs they follow. But the problem with this is, people don't know what they want. We know what they want! We're smart. We wrote this damn site, remember?
Promote posts that incite pointless conversations. Posts that are guaranteed to bait every troll into responding. Isn't that why all your Magat relatives love Facebook so much? We can do that!
P*ss off your content creators in every way possible (see #2).
Create algorithms that throw an unending barrage of irrelevant content in your face. Have you seen Instagram lately? We could do that so easy!!!
The app is slow. The website is slow. Obviously this is because of GIFs. Facebook and Instagram don't allow them, so why should we?
Conclusion
Our mission changes on a day-to-day basis. Right now we're super jealous of all the attention that new Threads thing is getting. We're still not sure what it is, but we're gonna download it after work.
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Can you write some headcannons of Izuku, Katsuki, Denki, Kiri, and Tamaki Amajiki dating a reader whose quirk is basically her being a magical girl.
Hey hey! Sorry this one took a min! This is so cute I have just been so mf busy with work and everything in like (why is finding new health insurance so mf hard) Hope you like it!! headcannons under the tag!! (I'm switching canon a little around for a few to fit reader into the story!)
Izuku, Katsuki, Denki, Kirishima, and Tamaki with a magical girl! S/O!
Izuku Midoriya
The first time Deku had seen your quirk he was absolutely stunned.
You guys were doing the villain and hero scenario's and you had been partnered with Uraraka to stop Iida and Bakugou from taking the bomb
It was normal at first, until the bright light went off
At first Izuku thought it was Bakugou setting off a particularly big explosion, the white of the blast blinding the cameras they were watching the fight from
But as it dimmed he realized it was focused around you, and as it went away he realized why your hero costume at first was so basic
It had completely transformed, you now adorned in a cute (favorite color) outfit, complete with bows and a small staff now in your hands
You seemed to move faster, even with the complicated outfit you were dodging your enemies left and right, sending out blasts from the staff you now carried
Izuku desperately wished he had his journal right now. How did your entire outfit change? And the increase in your stamina and dexterity?
You were keeping up very well with your opponents, dodging Bakugou's blasts left and right and moving faster than Iida could reach you
You were able to keep them long enough for the timer to run out, signaling your win against the hero team
As soon as you got back to the meeting room you were flocked by everyone, all of them aweing over your new costume and how your quirk worked
Another bright flash was sent out and you were back into your normal clothes, fatigue now visibly apparent on your face
Deku offered to take you to the infirmary to rest since his trial was already done
He tried really hard, but he couldn't stop himself from throwing question after question at you, wondering how your quirk worked, its drawbacks, and what all you could do
You were happy to answer all of his questions, bashful at the idea of someone so interested in your quirk
This blossomed your friendship, and little did you know how far your relationship would go
Katsuki Bakugou
Everyone teased him for your relationship
How did he, the angriest and most volatile student in UA, get together with one of the most upbeat and sociable students?
He made everyone who knew swear up and down they'd never let it out that he was the one that fell for you first
When he first saw your quirk, he thought it was the most obnoxious thing in the world, bright lights and frills and a wand?
But the power you had, the strength and how well you wielded the quirk's possibilities was admirable
Your sociable personality bounced off of his brash one well, making you two a popular couple
He knew you could handle yourself, sitting back during training knowing you'd always kick your opponents ass
Plus, he found it absolutely hilarious to see hardened, scary villains get demolished by you in your adorable costume, like a doll beating down Godzilla
He will also never admit it, but he finds your outfit adorable
He swears it changes a little bit every now and then, morphing to your growing personality
No matter what, its a perfect personification of you, and he will never get tired of it!
Denki Kaminari
The first time Denki saw you in action he swears he died and went to heaven
We know this guy watches anime, so the fact that, right before his eyes, a beautiful magical girl is here, just for him?
Technically just for him, as you two were sparring and you were coming right at him with your staff at the ready
He didn't care if he got teased for the quickest knockout in today's class, the fact that you carried him back to the infirmary and waited for him to wake up is all he needed to see before he decided he loved you
He hits you with so many flirty comments, calling you magical and asking you if you could sweep him off his feet
Luckily for him, it worked, and you two began dating
He will never stop bragging about you, showing off your quirk and cuteness to everyone he meets, daring them to fight you just so he can see you kick their asses, and see their faces as they realize the adorable and seemingly harmless girl they dared to fight could probably send them to hell and back
If anyone makes fun of your quirk he's quick to defend you, threatening to fight whoever dares to be mean to you, even though he knows you can defend yourself
He will never get over your magical girl outfit, begging you to activate your quirk just so he can take pictures of you in it
He will beg Momo to make a replica of it so you can wear it even while not activating your quirk
You are his beautiful magical princess and he will always treat you as such!
Eijiro Kirishima
You two are such a power duo
you both are power houses in a fight, and when you're partnered you are practically unstoppable
Imagine trying to block Kirishima while you're in the back shooting blast after blast of pure power
Any opponent would be overwhelmed quite easily
If anyone doubts you because of how your quirk looks he is the first to defend you, telling whoever is being mean to you that you are probably much stronger than most macho looking guys out there
If anyone's words ever get to you and you start doubting yourself he makes sure to shower you in reassurances, telling you that despite how girly someone may think your quirk looks you are a beast on the battlefield
He would ask you to help him train, to shoot blast after blast at him to help him increase the durability of his hardening
You two are easily the most popular couple at UA, your guys' kindness and strength make everyone feel safe and appreciated
Tamaki Amajiki
Tamaki first noticed you when you got second place in that year's sports festival, just behind Mirio
Mirio quickly became your friend, so of course you became good friends with Nejire and Tamaki too!
You and Nejire became best friends first, two of the cutest girls in your year made you quite popular
Tamaki was very intimidated by you at first, your flashiness and power was enough to make anyone shy
But you were so nice! How could he not respond to you and hang out with you when you asked so politely, and made sure to make plans in calm places so he wouldn't be overwhelmed?
Plus Mirio loved you, so that was good enough reason for him to open up to you
You're definitely the 'leader' in the relationship, taking lead of plans and any interactions you guys had while you were out
"He asked for no pickles" type of dynamic
You thought his power was absolutely amazing, and you never failed to tell him so, even though it made him a blushing mess
You got lots of love letters, many boys and girls alike showed affection for you and it made Amajiki very self conscious
You always reassured him, promising you would never leave him for someone else
He loves you with all his might and he will never stop showing it to you
Can you tell I lost all writing capabilities and motivation half way through this LOL I love this prompt I just suck at keeping focused. Love ya!
#mha#mha fic#mha x y/n#myheroacademia#my hero acedamia#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bakugou#my hero academia#deku x reader#izuku midoriya#izuku x reader#bakugou x reader#denki x y/n#denki kaminari#mha kirishima#kirishima eijirou#kirishima x reader#tamaki amajiki#tamaki x reader#amajiki x reader#amajiki tamaki x reader#bakugou katsuki#katsuki bakugo x reader
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oh golly how do you make these things
jayvik tickle hcs because i can
(sparkle sparkle)
separate and then together, a few swears, one tiny suggestive bit on jayce’s
JAYCE
lee!
ohhh boy. jayce my bbaby. okay. so as a decently muscular man, hes gotta be at least a little ticklish.
i think his worst spots are probably the spots you can just latch onto and squeeze- thighs, ribs, knees, even shoulders.
my boy cannot take a massage. he has tried so hard but every single time he’s just a hiccuping snorty mess
speaking of hiccuping snorty mess. i think he has a lot of different laughs. when you get him really going it’s his usual deep belly laughter, loud and proud and so bright you’re gonna need sunglasses
but also i think if you have him for long enough his laugh changes pitch a lot. like it’ll go from low to super high, and he’s all like “hahahAHAHAHHHSGH OHGOD OH GOD OH GOHOHOD” and oough. bbg
if it’s less intense, he’s not really one to giggle, but he definitely hiccups. he scrunches his face all up and jerks around and flinches and snorts and covers his mouth with the back of his hand and.. ghrhrgh.. im going insane guys
i think he’s the kind of guy who doesn’t squirm too much but arches his back a lot. he doesn’t squirm back and forth, but he’s always folding like a lawn chair, forwards and backwards
with his hiccupy/snorty laughter, he’ll go silent for a few seconds, and his shoulders just bounce as his whole body shakes, face absolutely BURNING red
oh yeah and he’s a blusher. bigtime. he gets a little flustered at the fact he can get plucked apart so easily by something as silly as tickling. he doesn’t think its childish, per se, but certainly not something a grown man should be This weak to.
..and yeah, he likes it. he’s embarrassed about it, but won’t necessarily deny it. he kind of has a thing for going all dumb and happy and brainless. just made into a smiley little puddle of jayce
oh and his smile. i know these hcs are already so freaking long but his smilee he is always grinning. even just a poke and he’s already got a big dumb smile. he is literally the sun when being tickled, it’s absurd
i didnt even get into soft tickles yet what
okay so we all know his abs are sensitive. i think he might just die at some gentle fluttery fingers. same with his sides and back
hear me out. behind the knees. oh and biceps. and the underside of his arms in general. and his forearms. none of them are too bad, but he’ll still squirm a little if you just slowly trace your fingers over them
post-season-2(SPOILERS KINDA??) his wrist his mad sensitive from the crystal embedded in there.
all of his scars are sensitive too. i don’t think he has too many, but the ones he does have are Big and also very ticklish <3
all in all i think he’s very sensitive. he’s the type to be flinching and squirming at things that aren’t even supposed to be ticklish, like god this man cannot take a tummy rub. if someone’s hands are on him in a sensual manner he can’t hold back tiny little giggle-huffs.
whenever anyone’s hands are on his bare skin in any soft manner, he’s. he can’t. he is too ticklish to survive on this earth
okay im gonna stop myself there or im gonna be ranting for seven more paragraphs
ler!
this little shit oh my god
okay no i take that back. i feel like he would be a smug cocky little shit, but not always.
im sorry, i have to say it, engineer hands
i have less ler hcs than i do lee hcs for him but i do think he would be absurdly switchy. he’s the type of guy to just poke people at random whenever he’s bored or to prove a point
has a habit of digging. he’ll find a nice meaty spot and just squeeze it lighting fast for about a second and then give you a teensy little break before doing the exact same thing again
he can be a little merciless though. he doesn’t realize just how good he is at tickling, he just thinks everyone who he tickles is mad sensitive
its hilarious though. he’ll be like “How did I never know you were this ticklish?!” and the lee will be like I DIDN’T KNOW EITHER HOW ARE YOU DOING THIS-
his hands are going all over the place, too. if he has a really handsy/squirmy lee, he’ll just keep switching spots every time they go to defend something. arms glue to their sides? okay, he’ll switch to their knees. legs pull up? okay, neck now. shoulders scrunch? ooh, armpits are fun!
he is such a menace and doesn’t even realize it
he’s crazy playful. mostly back in academy days, but if you can get close enough to him as the man of progress, and he has some free time, he’s so freaking playful its wonderful
he thinks its fun, and he likes seeing people’s stress just melt away. he will get a little worried if you tell him to stop, though, and pulls back a little if you do. he doesn’t wanna hurt you or make you uncomfortable.
definitely pokes people a lot but doesn’t actually engage in full attacks all that often. usually he has to be pretty close friends with someone to do that.
he’s very gentle with viktor when he tickles him, sometimes a little too gentle. it’s agony
VIKTOR
lee!
okay im gonna say it now before the thought leaves my brain. ticklish ears
he’s a lot more keen to light tickles as rougher stuff just kinda hurts a lot of the time or gets him really overwhelmed
tbh if you wanna get him bad, tools are probably best bet. rough tickles with hands are a little too much, but get a feather or a pen or a brush and Hoo boy you’ve killed Viktor.
i don’t actually think he’s all that ticklish. like he is but he isn’t? he’s sensitive but not hypersensitive, i guess.
except for his bad spots. i think its more of a thing where he’s not too ticklish in most places but his bad spots get him writhing.
of course i’m obliged to say neck, ears, jaw, back.. the works. i think his stomach has the potential to be sensitive but he’s a little too skin and bones for it to really impact him.
he has a lot of vaguely unusual spots. his wrists and palms are sensitive, i think his scalp is even a little sensitive. he doesn’t like people playing with his hair for that reason
if not for his brace i’d say his back and spine especially would be real bad. without his brace, just tracing a line all the way up his spine has him jerking forward so hard sometimes he falls over. and absolutely spits out any drink he may be drinking. i mean it feels like stars bursting all the way up his back, okay?? so tingly
he’s the type to hold his stomach when laughing really hard, just in general
he’s also a big snorter, but he uhm.. he has a very maniacal laugh. it’s literally just like- a whole villain laugh. absolutely terrifying.
i think he’s a lot less sensitive than jayce in theory, but in practice he’s a lot less used to it and very squirmy
so squirmy. very slippery. i wouldn’t quite say nimble, because of his leg, but- at the very least very good at escaping.
definitely the type to go straight for his ler’s sides to get them off him. he panics and just squeezes. usually it works but sometimes it doesn’t
i think he has the potential to be a giggler. idk though. he wouldn’t have bubbly giggles as much as he would have really breathy, huffy giggles. silent giggles are another big thing
i think he’s very neutral on the whole concept. he has to be in the right mood and it has to be with someone he trusts with his life.
feather-ticklish bastard. trust me on this
ler!
idk about you guys but viktor talking like he’s documenting an experiment while tickling someone? oughhrgrh.
im usually not one for teases but aaugrgghgrgr.
his hands are absurdly nimble, so while he can commonly be overpowered by his lee, he’s still a slippery bastard and somehow manages to slip into all of someone’s worst spots
i’m kinda stealing this hc from someone else, but i think he is very good at predicting/guessing someone’s weak spots. “HOHOW DID YOU KNOW I-“ “oh, i just guessed. not very hard, you know.” gggggraagg
i really can’t explain just how evil he is. those nimble hands of his are all over someone in seconds, spidering and digging into every single spot and switching at lighting speeds.
very good at tickling people, i think. him and jayce are on a pretty even playing field for that
i have such a distinct idea of what ler!viktor would be but for some reason i just cant explain it with words.
TOGETHER
oh these two. these two. i’m.
they are so switchy it’s scary. tickle fights with these two are not tickle fights, they are strategic tickle wars.
viktor tickles jayce out of stress a lot. jayce is definitely the type to get overwhelmed with stress and not tell anyone, literal king of masking, but ofc viktor sees through it in seconds and wrecks him until he admits what’s wrong. and then viktor wrecks him some more so he can forget about it for a little while
they’re always teasing eachother. on energetic days they’re both so playful with eachother, and they’ll be poking eachother around the lab all day until one of them cracks and launches an attack
they wreck eachother just to prove a point sometimes.
jayce has a habit of getting viktor when he’s being too cocky or sassy. viktor has a habit of getting jayce just because he feels like it.
jayce tickles viktor when he’s bored, he’ll pick up a quill and flutter it against the back of viktor’s neck while he’s ranting about something.
they get revenge a lot, but then they get revenge on the revenge, so it’s kind of.. a cycle
they know eachother’s boundaries like the back of their hands, since they’ve known eachother so long they’re very good at knowing exactly when to stop and exactly what to do
they also pick up on eachother’s lee moods.. and ler moods sometimes. let’s just say jayce knows when to run when viktor gets a certain look in his eyes
aftercare with them is sickeningly soft. brushing hair out of faces, gently caressing skin, massaging eachother to get rid of some of the lingering tingles, all of it. they hold hands and press up next to eachother and ghhgh. even if its in a scenario where they aren’t dating, they still do all of this, and if someone questions it they just shrug. just two bros bein dudes, nothing to see here
i feel like these together hcs are so bad im sorry. it’s so early rn and im suffering Hunger. ill probably make more of these in the future if anyone is interested
feel free to shoot me an ask or two about them as well!!
#jayvik tickles#tickle hcs#arcane tickles#arcane tickling#lee!viktor#ler!viktor#lee!jayce#ler!jayce#ticklish!viktor#ticklish!jayce#arcane tickle#how many tags must i add for this to reach my target audience#wrongposting
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hockey abby 🌀🌀🌀
oh i need her so bad. want her so bad. also ik nothingggg abt hockey so don't beat me up guys.
click for palestine | dont buy tlou | read b4 engaging w me
hockey!abby who's actually a sweetie. beast on the ice. monster of a coach and captain, but such a sweet girlfriend. she's always more than happy to see you out in the stands, wearing her large jersey, cheering her on.
hockey!abby who coaches little league hockey. she loves kids, but they're awful. and by awful, they're actually hilarious. she has to stifle laughter during practice and reprimand them, but once she's home with you she's telling you everything.
hockey!abby who's definitely got a light 'hockey accent.' she denies it with her life. she hasn't got an accent, its you who's got an accent! but you've got videos of her saying "sorry" like a filthy canadian. she swears on her life it's a deepfake video of her. how could you do that to your pretty baby? she trusted you. what's next, fake news of her losing a game? gosh, papparazzi these days.
hockey!abby who brings you out on the ice when she's the only one practicing. slipping skates on your feet carefully, and holding your hand softly. she'd race you but you'd totally lose, and she doesn't wanna hurt your feelings.
hockey!abby who's fights with the ref every chance she gets. she gets heated quick and easy. whenever she loses because of a stupid ref call, you never hear the end of it.
"that ref is a fucking asshole. why's she even a ref? i can do a better job than her." she rolled her eyes.
whenever she's pissed, its easier to butter her up and stroke her ego. "you would, but you're a much better player baby," you take her hand and kiss her pulse point. "besides, i'd miss watching you play on the ice."
she smiles to herself, "when you're right you're right babe." she agrees, humming.
hockey!abby who is always in the penalty box. always swearing off on the ice. she's one of the few female players who does start fights on the ice, and they are brutal. blood flying, helmets clashing, sticks thrashing. she always makes you kiss her bruises better, and you always oblige. smiling against each scab and scolding her when finished.
hockey!abby who is always ending up in tik tok edits and has the most obscene comments. it drives you mad, but it just confuses her. cause her entire page is a shrine of you and your realtionship. she does post herself here and again. gym selfies, post practice drill check ins, once or twice with her hair out. which everyone knows, is a real panty dropper. but they're totally innocent pictures! she's got her eyes on you and you only! she replies to vulgar comments with corny stuff like:
'im happily married!'
'my gf shook her head in disgust when she read this'
'plz stop trying to build a wedge btw me n my girl! our cats won't like this!'
hockey!abby who always goes to speaker events and is incredibly passionate about women in sports. she encourages young girls to get engaged as young as possible. she always wants to uplift morale and increase the amount of girl in sports, especially her sport.
hockey!abby oh hockey!abby.
#written by lina ⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆#abby anderson smut#abby anderson x reader#abby anderson x female reader#abby anderson#abby anderson fluff#abby x reader#abby the last of us#abby tlou#abby x you#hockey!au#hockey!abby#hockey!abby anderson#hockey!abby anderson x reader#hockey!abby x reader#abby anderson x black!reader#black!fem!reader#black!reader#latina!reader#tlou fanfiction#tlou2#tlou#wlw fanfic#sapphic#fanfic#fluff#abby anderson drabble#abby anderson imagine#abby smut#abby headcanons
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