#its bs killer of course it is

[absurdumsid]

badsansuary day !! i forgor its like ten days late whoops

anyway the great thing about paralleling illusts is i can just copy paste stuff

my friend kept calling him oopy goopy i fear they are correct

[a-killer-obsession]

OKAY I DID IT, I FIGURED OUT THE LAYOUT

Disclaimer: it seems like the size of the ship changes every time we see it, but the newest eps vs wano seem pretty consistent so I went with that and used Wire's height for scale

Floor layouts under the cut ✂️

Edit: you can find clearer/more detailed versions here

Layout based on the 31 member crew that Oda confirmed. I also took in to account that a significant portion of the members are fucking massive, so everything is bigger which matches the scale it's drawn in. Floors are approx 5m high with 2m wide doors in most places, which makes sense when a good portion of the crew are 3m tall.

Sorry about my handwritting lmao I'm so tired but I have serious brainworms and couldn't sleep

The specifics:

Kid's Floor

Of course he has his own floor

Quarters include his own private dining space which I imagine would also include a workdesk, bedroom with king sized bed and probably a couch, walk in closet, and bathroom definitely large enough for a massive tub

Workshop also has bathroom entrance for when he's feelin lazy

Ladder space in the middle goes straight through, this is so crew going to the castle deck don't access his floor

Commander's floor

Heat, Wire and Killer have their own rooms and a private lounge just for them and Kid

Heat and Wire share a large bathroom, definitely big enough for normal bath

Heat and Killer have king sized beds, Wire's bed is almost as wide as a king but mostly it's made especially long

Small decking that runs the whole way around, unspoken rule that crew aren't allowed there since windows peer into commander's rooms

Killer could probably fit a drumkit in his room 👀

Cannon Deck

We get peeks of this in the anime and in Oda's notes but they're fuzzy so I just did my best

Made a mistake tho, cannon platform should be whole way around back like a U shape to account for 3 cannons facing backwards, total 9 cannons

Theoretically this is where the helm should be so uh that's where I put it

Screenshots make it look like they also store a lot of other weapons here

Main deck

Forecastle includes navigation room with bookcases, central table, and desk for paperwork

Forecastle also has infirmary with two longer than normal beds to account for larger crewmates, and a desk for crew doctor to keep notes

Door between nav and infirmary cos Kid is lazy

Kitchen and pantry. Given the rooms are 5m from floor to ceiling I imagine that pantry would have a small mezzanine accessed by a ladder to take advantage of vertical space (and would be a sick place to nap)

Galley/dining hall contains 3 bench style tables, seating 10 large crewmates each, with one extra fancy chair at the end of one for Kid

Lower deck

Did my best to do some math to figure out how many larger than normal beds were required and decided on 6 bunks for 12 larger crewmates

Additional rooms for average sized crewmates include 4 rooms with 2 bunks each, and one room with 1 bunk, making for a total of 30 beds below deck. That means, counting the commanders for the 31, there are currently 3 empty beds, so a few rooms aren't complete full

Probably looks like fuck all space but its actually significant for a ship living quarters

According to google you only need 1 toilet per 10 people and 1 shower per 40 but that seems like BS. Bathroom has 4 large, accessible sized toilets, 4 showers, long benches down the center and a long counter with plenty of space and mirrors for makeup, given how many crewmates wear it

Also, storage room. Could be converted to extra room for another bunk

Hold

Access via ladder

4 cells. No toilets, you get a bucket ✌️ tbh might not even have beds but there's room for em anyway

Desk in case they need to keep an eye on prisoners

3 storage rooms, but i think one of these would actually be a torture room. Probably the one by the desk.

Mechanisms for power and water are probably in one of these rooms as well as a lot of materials for ship repairs

Also of note

Crows nest is definitely big enough for a bench, definitely big enough for... activities. Not as big as the Sunny's though I dont think a gym would fit, I think it'd be more likely that gym equipment is kept on the cannon deck

Idk if the mizzenmast is supposed to go all the way through but that physically can't happen with where the helm needs to be based on screenshots so ✌️

Crows nests are definitely access via climbing nets

Please absolutely feel free to use this as a reference for fanfictions, but I'd appreciate a shout out if you do 💖

[thenixkat]

also the president gave shoot on sight orders for the Joker. I dont think anyone would care if a superhero murdered the Joker who's orchestrating the mass death of thousands at this very moment, Nightwing. Get off yer fucking high horse

of course the Jokerization is randomly killing/dropping villains now. We can't have this ass pull have any real long term effects

faces

they got paid. so the doctor that diagnosed the Joker with a brain tumor was playing a prank on the Joker and didnt think it would go horribly wrong

folks making deals with that fuckin brainworm that i know is usually up to some shit

ok just spread the jokerness via tainted rain, sure, whatever

you were just fleeing from Joker the other issue why are you demanding being taken to him now? Fuck it, let Harley go to the Joker so he can rape and kill her, it's what she fucking wants right now. Let her get her dipshit ass killed.

also Dr. Langstrom is that Dr. Langstrom, the werebat. In this he turns when stressed.

there's a protocol in place for getting Dr. Langstron to calm his shit when he goes werebat. They shot him with some calming drugs

meanwhile, Harley is getting cavity searched for a 3rd time apparently by an overly gleeful lady soldier, cause sexual assault is funny when its lady on lady apparently.

Oracle calls in Huntress, a hero known for killing fuckers, to do whatever she feels necessary to save Robin and clear out some jokerized villains. Just dont tell Batman

jokerized, ugh, Killer Croc called dibs on some Robin wings

Nightwing you know better than trying to reason with the fucking Joker. Also staple gun

oh hey Batman put tracking devices in the costume upgrades he gave his allies. Gotta love that paranoid big brother bs. Someday folks are gonna get tired of that shit and beat Batman's ass

like that's rude as hell also fucking boob socks on the fucking bulletproof vest is a shitty art decision

i doubt Tim-Robin got eaten that quickly and Killer Croc is still fucking hungry. Tim's a decent-sized child, with plenty of meat

again, I don't think Tim-Robin is dead. An offscreen death in a miniseries that doesnt focus on him? I dont buy it

and even if he was he'd be back sooner rather than later

also since when does a superhero need to be sanctioned? I doubt Batman can keep every hero he doesnt like/wont bow to him out of Gotham

oh so now Nightwing is ok with killing Joker. It only took the Joker killing Jason, crippling Barbra, and killing Tim too. Damn, fuck you Nightwing

The Joker has to murder and maim multiple people that Dick is close to b4 dude would consider killing him. Man, I'd be pissed off at Nightwing if I lived in this world and had folks I knew murdered and maimed and the heroes only get serious when it gets personal

yeah, these heroes should have more enemies with the common people just for that alone. 'You had teh chance to stop a terrible fucker and chose not to. Repeatedly even tho the bodies kept pilling up' also the folks in charge with stopping the prison riot are …alive after getting sucked into a gravity well. B/c gravity wells transport fuckers to a pocket dimension instead of crushing the shit out of things in this world. They've been dodging the aquatic villains and murdering one villain who's power is he gets a new power every time he dies which is extremely unethical

Oracle switched positions and wants Batman to stop Nightwing from murdering the Joker.

let him kill the Joker and get him some therapy after, yall making this more of a problem than it needs to be

No shit Tim-Robin wasnt dead. They didnt even put a whole issue between the fake out and him being back

fucking bleeding hearted saps feeling bad about killing the Joker. Couldn't be me

Batman you should have let him die. Everyone the Joker kills after this is directly on your fucking head.

yall weak ass bitches. Everyone the Joker kills after this is on you all for reviving the fucker.

the put the Joker back in prison instead of just killing him. so he can escape again at some point for more adventures. Lex Luthor is the president, its not like he has fucking morals or that the global public doesnt want the Joker dead. Just kill him

and that's the end. There's no good reason for anyone involved to not just fucking kill the Joker

the villains dont like him, the heroes should kill him for the greater good and they'd actually be justified in this one case more than anything else, the world governments should want the Joker dead. No one benefits to the Joker continuing to be alive

[herofics]

I’m back on my mha bs so do you suppose we could have some friendship headcanons for todoroki, izuku, and iida where the reader doesn’t go to UA but still has an amazingly powerful quirk (kinda like the nature sprite from fantasia 2000) and is an absolute free spirit?

please and thank you

A/N: It’s been ages since I saw disney’s Fantasia (at least that’s what I assume you meant), so I had to google some stuff about the whole nature spirit thing. It’s not really exactly the same powers, because that would be pretty overpowered, but I took the nature/plant/animal stuff and used that

~Iida Tenya~

•You knew Iida from before he went to UA and you kept in contact even after he entered the school

•You’re childhood friends actually

•You went to a different school, since you didn’t want to do hero work, and you wanted to become a veterinarian

•Your ability to communicate with animals and your connection to them means you’re a great fit for that

•You were really worried when Tensei ended up in the hospital because of the hero killer, and you reached out to Iida and went to support him at the hospital

•You could see he was incredibly distraught about the whole situation, you were upset too, Tensei was (or at least used to be) like a big brother to you too

•You also visited Iida at the hospital when he ended up there after his confrontation with the hero killer

•It was the first time you met any of his friends from UA and you were of course super worried for Iida, but it was nice to meet his friends too

•You were pretty upset that Iida had gotten so hurt, and your quirk kinda has a mind of its own when you’re feeling strong emotions

•So the flowers that were by Iida’s bedside started growing as you told him he was an idiot and that he needs to be more careful

•Iida promises that he will be more careful, and you do believe him

•You walked him out of the hospital later that same day and you talked about how things had been lately, how Tensei was doing and all that

•Iida promised to call you once he got back to school and keep you updated on how he was healing

~Todoroki Shouto~

•You’re Todoroki’s neighbor, and you met for the first time when you were like 3 years old

•So about a year or two before his mom ended up in the hospital

•You’ve been a lifeline for him ever since you met, and Rei always encouraged your friendship, so after she went to the hospital, Shouto needed you even more

•Of course Endeavor didn’t really like you, because he thought you made Shouto soft and weak, even though it was just that you made him happier

•You and Shouto also went to the same school up until he enrolled in UA

•You remained close friends even then, even though you didn’t contact each other very often

•Both of you felt like you didn’t need to keep in constant contact to remain good friends

•You of course contacted him after the USJ incident

•You hadn’t seen each other in a while, and you wanted to make sure he was okay

•He came over to your house later that week, and you talked a lot about how you’d both started at new schools and how it had been

•You’ve got a lot of plants in your room and when he told you about what had happened at USJ, you got really angry about the whole situation even happening, so the plants started growing pretty uncontrollably

•Shouto knows this means you’re feeling strong emotions, since he’s seen this happen multiple times since you were kids

•You were mostly upset, but also very happy that he hadn’t gotten hurt

•Though you weren’t really super surprised about that, he had always been really strong

•You talked for quite a long time, and it was nice for Shouto to get some of his thoughts out too

~Midoriya Izuku~

•You’ve been friends with him since elementary school, after Bakugou became a jackass towards him

•You actually bonded first because you both had green hair, your hair was plants and flowers and vines and such and Midoriya thought it was really interesting

•Animals love you and you can grow plants and even control them to a certain degree

•When Midoriya first met you, he thought you were like a nature spirit from an anime or something

•You’ve remained close friends, but your communication sort of dwindled when he was training for OfA, but you of course didn’t know the reason

•You were pretty scared that he was getting depressed, because he seemed to be withdrawing from you, but in reality, it was just him being super busy with his training

•When All Might found out about this, he encouraged Midoriya to keep in contact with you, because friends are important

•You were the second person he told when he got his UA acceptance (his mom was the first)

•The situation being confusing to you was the understatement of the year

•You tried to pry, but Midoriya wouldn’t tell you, so you just let it go

•There was something weird about the whole thing of course, but you were so happy for him, he was reaching for his dreams

•Midoriya felt so bad that he couldn’t tell you, but it just wasn’t possible

•You heard about him getting injured all the time, and you lectured him about it almost every time it happened

•When Midoriya moved into the dorms, you saw each other less, but you kept in contact and saw each other when he came to visit his mom or when he otherwise got permission

•You remained good friends and kept in pretty frequent contact, sending each other pictures and sharing music and stuff like that

•Midoriya’s pictures kinda suck though, he somehow always manages to make them blurry or his thumb is in the picture

[flowerslut]

Haha despite not having posted in 10 years, my blog shows my teenage angsty self so perfectly i will never delete it :) I have a question if its alright, one of the things I love is the way you've written the relationship between Rosalie and Jasper. I always felt they must be close and Rosalie wouldn't share her human last name with him if they weren't. However they both had a very different violent past and i imagine it being difficult at the beginning. How do you think they bonded?

THE PERFECT TIME CAPSULE BLOG I love to see it thank you for preserving such vital history 🤝

I'm so happy you asked this because I answered this pretty thoroughly a few months ago here in this ask. but I love that you ask it in reference to their starkly "different violent" pasts, because like yes!!!!! they're on opposite ends of the spectrum there! sure they both have 'fucked up' backstories, but in this case Pretzels is Not The Same and I looooove zeroing in on this to add another layer of "rosalie was definitely not okay with their arrival NOR SHOULD SHE HAVE BEEN! *gestures to jasper's Everything*"

rosalie was a victim of a horrific crime who was changed via carlisle to save her life. jasper was very much not a victim at the time that maria found him and was changed as a form of recruitment for a very different army in a very different war. now of course there are arguments to be made about jasper being a victim in this circumstance, and while there is nuance to it (after all, what would drive a 16 year old to run away from home in the 1860s to join a brutal, deadly war that they'd probably end up dying in if they stuck with it?) I typically have to disagree when people like to try and pass jasper off as this innocent little baby Who Knew Nothing Better 🙄. but I digress, this isn't about jasper. this is about rosalie's and jasper's contrasting starts to immortality which I find so interesting

I love rosalie and jasper's relationship for sooo many reasons and this completely different start to 'life' is a big one! rosalie was a victim of intimate partner violence who was changed into a superpowered bloodthirsty immortal vampire. after this she sought revenge, killed her killers but did it without spilling their blood, reclaiming some measure of power despite now existing in this life she never wanted and pretty goddamn miserable because of it. jasper was a perpetrator of violence even before he gained immortality (even without "seeing any real battle" or whatever bs line they gave him in the movie) which only escalated when maria found him and he was gifted with his own superpowered bloodthirsty vampirism. then, surprise! his has an extra superpower! which helps him to control this army and continue this cycle of violence, but slowly it begins to wear on his mental state until this "monster of the grisliest kind" becomes a depressed meandering nomad destined for suicide if we're being real here

again, I won't get into it too far or this answer could be another 1k+ words long, but even in eclipse, jasper doesn't try to dodge responsibility or moralize when he's telling bella his story, he just tells it as it is. (which I've said before but I adore as a character choice. it makes him so much less bastard-man-coded than edward because of it. and thank GOD 💀) but I find it so so so interesting that the two cullens (hales) that bella has less of a grip on are the ones who come from such violent backgrounds! but! on different ends!! of this spectrum of violence!!! it makes it that much more meaningful to me when you see them take each other's sides in midnight sun, as they seem to acknowledge that if someone's gotta make the tough choices, it'll be them 🤩 ugh I just love them so much, yknow?

[klonoadreams]

I was reading all the posts about Mako and, damn, now I have a taste(? for the couple that won't be a couple, Dellinger x Mako.

It's impossible but that has never stopped the ships. (And then I remember the age difference they have, it would be more or less the difference between Pudding and Sanji, right?)

Would there be about 4 Fishman/human hybrids? Big Mom's twins, Mako and Dellinger?

Who would be your actress in mind for a live action? I dominate Anya Taylor Joy or Isabella Gomez.

Lmao the NOTP of interest, like nope for reasons but also owo 👀

I getchu tho, its the concept, the parallels, but also, without Dellinger, we wouldn't have had Mako in the first place.

It's an interesting concept. Also yee, those actresses seem cool, Jenna Ortega or Xochitl Gomez are also some I'd have in mind too. So fun :V

Idk about the hybrids, yes maybe??? Idk lmaoo

Also gather round for my tirades. Its gonna get looong lmao and also at some point I went fuck it because nuance but also I don't have the brain cells to even go anything further than what I just blurbed lmao.

Like, sometimes I forget that Pudding is 16, but like that's why I had to make One Piece the exception to a lot of shenanigans, given the complexity of the fact that you got 17 and 19 year olds drinking so much, which even by the standards of Japan's drinking age, its still under it (which is 20).

So at soem point I was just fuck it, we ball. It's like with my Naruto fics, where you just set apart the civilians from our ninjas. Do that with pirates and whatever.

But remember, civilians are exempt from this. Thats why you got Mei flirting (albeit, playfully) with Chouko and how Killer B said she wasn't his type do to marriage custom shenanigans. And of course pre official genin Haku considered a civilian when he got engaged to Chouko, even tho he's older than her lmaooo.

It's honestly easier this way, but always keep in mind there is a line to be drawn. And that's why you got Law, Robin, Mako, and so many others that are resentful of the World Government.

Because they didn't even have a choice when they were all forced to grow up so soon, which is why so many of them are stunted to a degree. Even Mako has her own suffering, with how she kept suppressing her own emotions, to the point it made her sick because her body could not handle the strain at all.

Zoro probably has the most "normal" ish upbringing like he went through a lot, but no abuse, no neglect, no world government bs, but something along the lines of what I call Bridge to Terebithia, where you lose your childhood friend so suddenly like that. Because life is random sometimes and it sucks (also the writer's son's friend irl died via lightning strike, but it was tweaked to what happened in the book because it wasn't as realistic so yeah), and it will forever stay with you. So live on.

Probs the most stable as a result, he is a rock. Love him. :V

[greensparty]

This Month In History - July Part 1

This month there's so many pop culture landmark anniversaries to the point where I needed to do a part 1 and part 2. Here is part 1 of what I celebrate this month in history:

July 1, 1979: Sony releases the walkman

On this day in 1979 the first ever walkman was released. Here is my piece I wrote in 2019. Happy 45 walkman!

July 2, 1999: Summer of Sam opens

In July 1999, one of Spike Lee's most underrated movies was released. The fictional narrative film looks back at the Summer of 1977 in NYC as a Bronx neighborhood becomes paranoid about the Son of Sam murders and begin suspecting one of their own as the killer. It also showed the way that you could be at a disco in NYC and then within minutes be at a punk club. I loved the cast and the way that Lee showed the paranoia growing within this group, not unlike that Twilight Zone with the neighbors getting suspicious. Happy 25th SOS!

July 3, 2004: Before Sunset opens

In July 2004, one of the greatest sequels ever made was released. Here is my piece I wrote in 2019. Happy 20th BS!

July 5, 1989: Seinfeld premieres

In July 1989, the pilot episode of Seinfeld aired on NBC. Here is my piece I wrote in 2014. Happy 35th Seinfeld!

July 9, 1999: American Pie opens

In July 1999, one of the funniest movies of 1999 opened. Here is my piece I wrote in 2014. Happy 25th AP!

July 6, 1964: A Hard Day's Night opens in the U.K. and July 10, 1964: A Hard Day's Night soundtrack

In July 1964, the soundtrack to the aforementioned Beatles movie was released. Here is my piece I wrote in 2019. Happy 60th AHDN album!

July 11, 2014: Boyhood opens

In July 2014, Richard Linklater's epic 12 years in the making was released. The MA premiere took place at the 2014 IFFBoston, where my doc Life on the V: The Story of V66 had its World Premiere. To know my film was under the same umbrella as Linklater was truly an honor and when I saw it I was blown away. He had the creativity, patience and vision to show a boy ACTUALLY growing up over the course of 12 years. I named it my #1 Movie of 2014 and also my #1 Movie of the 2010s decade. This is also a movie with a great deal of truths that I find myself referencing frequently. Happy 10 Boyhood!

July 14, 1969: Easy Rider opens

In July 1969, one of the great 1960s movies was released. Here is my piece I wrote in 2019. Happy 55th ER!

July 14, 1999: The Blair Witch Project opens

In July 1999, the high standard of all found footage movies was released. Here is my piece I wrote in 2014. Happy 25th TBWP!

Stay tuned for Part 2 of This Month in History for July.

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

I think one of the big reasons chapter 3 of v3 reveal doesn't feel as bad is because they don't fucking lampshade it, like they pointed out in the trial in thh that split personality serial killer is a bad overdone trope, but they still do it.

(but also Kiyo's incest thing doesn't both me too much Because he's a serial killer, like by the time we learn about That part it's already established that he's a serial killer who has been killing girls for the sake of his sister, so it's like par for the course of fucked up serial killer shit y'know vs if he wasn't a serial killer and still had that incest stuff)

Idk if any of this makes sense

Danganronpa does that quite a bit and to be honest it's one of my least favourite things, especially when its about the more problematic elements. There was a moment watching udg where Toko goes off on a book having bad DID representation and Komaru is like "I dont think this was about you specifically though..." and it just made me. So Frustrated. I mean. This isn't exactly lampshading, but it's similar right?

As for korekiyo, I think I see what you mean. I mean it Did bother me, and I genuinely still don't like that about his character at all, but it was just following the same reveal throughline as they had been going down with him, like you said. He is fucked up, here's how he's even more fucked up. vs 1-2 is more like. Out of nowhere here's some problematic BS about two characters who aren't even the blackened.

[pararennial-archived]

COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS

Hm... I mean... there are so many misconceptions that border on the intersectionality of Roxy being a woman of colour, asexual, and other aspects of her personality and character. To start, women often get typecasted as the caretaker, the love interest, the sexual conquest, or get assigned gross and shitty complexes because people don't like to think that there are more dimensions to women other than being good/bad, pure/corrupted, messy/pristine, etc.

Again, these complexes are what makes me resent writing a female character, not gonna lie! People see that Roxy, fundamentally, is a good person. She has upstanding morals, integrity, and she fights the good fight. And people have it in their heads that she is an "uwu sunshine pure vanilla bean baby" ( and I will say her being ace doesn't help because people tend to assign that pure, virginal presumption to asexuality, which is incredibly ignorant! ) but really, she is kind and sweet but it doesn't mean she doesn't have a spine. The girl can have a bit of a mean streak at times!

On the other hand, when Roxy exhibits her more competent and ruthless side, people are all like "OH YES STEP ON ME KILLER QUEEN, YES YOU COLD AND BLOODBATHED GODDESS." That also bothers me because it also doesn't capture the full dimension of Roxy being a fully realized character who is multifaceted and cannot be pigeonholed. She won't always be strong, decisive, or cold, and she won't always be soft, warm, or affable. To presume how she would act or behave is simply... a grave mistake.

AN IMPORTANT HEADCANON

In terms of the meta, Roxy is not your typical hero. Yes she fights the good fight but does so in very complicated ways that allow her to surf within that grey area. Nothing is ever black and white in her world. And thus, she is more of a culture hero ⏤ somebody who can change / recreate the world. As a categorized Good character, she often wildly swings between Lawful, Neutral, and Chaotic depending on whatever methods or approaches suit the situation. She abides by and breaks rules, she creates and destroys, she cleans and makes messes, etc. All in all, it's to ensure that balance is maintained and restored, and she doesn't even know how vital her role is.

A USELESS HEADCANON

One of the things that will bear no meaning or significance in plots, threads, etc. is that she likes putting gummy bears with her ice cream. I dunno why, it just makes him harder to chew but Roxy likes that??? Weirdo...

POTENTIAL TRIGGERS

I mean in terms of triggers, there might be written literal or metaphorical gore as I am noticing that viscera tends to make its way into my writing. Struggles with mental health is also present in a way in which trauma is dealt personally and how intergenerational trauma is a huge proponent in Roxy's story. Of course in spite of all the supernatural BS she has to deal with, she is still very much a person dealing with things the best she can. Some of these fantastical aspects sometimes could bleed very well into relatability in which some take comfort in or it can be too much. I don't go too heavy with triggers in my writing, but that being said, I could still very well write some trigger-heavy things without knowing because everybody has their own lived experiences and everybody's traumas manifest in different ways.

SOMETHING YOU ENJOY ABOUT (WRITING) THEM

I think it's the growth of Roxy's character, I've rped her since 2013 seeing her actually grow from a teenager to an adult. It's a journey along with that, so was writing and finding my own voice and style as an author.

Furthermore, I actually like writing a character who has multifaceted and very flexible because it keeps her dynamic. At this rate, she's become more than what I had her set out to be and it's a blast to see where she goes!

SOMETHING YOU WANT OTHERS TO KNOW BEFORE WRITING WITH THEM

fuck around and find out

tagged: @velvetineblue tagging: whoever wants to go off on what they love about writing their muse

[goshdangronpa]

Thinkin about my old ideas for "I DISAGREE: An Ibuki Mioda SDR2 Protag Swap AU" and remembered what I wanted to post next. Previously, I talked about how Ibuki might be like as a protagonist, but I didn't get into what she'd be like during the class trials. So, let's get into it!

One Step Closer to the Edge: Ibuki in the Trials

Hajime and the other DR protagonists approach class trials by piecing together clues and finding holes in arguments. Ibuki has never shown an aptitude for that kind of reasoning. She contributes almost nothing during the two class trials in which she’s present.

To be clear, Ibuki’s not a total idiot, either - though it’d be great if she’s briefly stumped when asked to name the number of sides in an octagon (“Rock stars don’t need to know calculus!” “Ibuki, it’s basic geometry …”). If she hopes to determine the killer and save everyone else, she’ll need to tap into different strengths:

Perfect listening! In Chapter 1, Ibuki boasts about her extraordinary ability to … tell which of her classmates is talking when it’s dark. Not that impressive, with everyone having a distinct voice and manner of speech, but I’ve always loved the notion that her hearing is enhanced as a result of her Ultimate Light Musician talent. Imagine an SDR2 that includes Mass Panic Debates before their introduction in V3. Years of discerning the layers in complex instrumentals would help Ibuki sort through the noise of the hysteria and find the arguments that matter most.

Perfect recall! What is impressive about her contribution in Chapter 1 isn’t that she recognizes her classmates’ voices, but that she remembers everyone’s exact words and the order in which they talked. That’s quite a memory! Something like that could really come in handy down the line, with mysteries built around a need to carefully remember events. Maybe Monokuma could even decide that instead of offering a limited number of details in a Monokuma file, he should just destroy all the e-Handbooks. That would require Ibuki to exercise this ability like never before.

BS detector! I swear it’s not just because I’m a big fan of the mystery-of-the-week TV series Poker Face. Look, Ibuki’s living her truth right now, but that’s only after spending a long time hiding behind a conformist facade. That experience helps her recognize when someone isn’t being fully honest. (It’s a good thing this is just a narrative and not an actual Danganronpa game!) As fellow Poker Face fans might recognize, this seemingly busted ability comes with its own challenges: figuring out exactly why someone is lying, learning to discern when someone only believes they’re telling the truth, and so on. Then there’s Byakuya Togami, who seems honest but has something just a little off about him.

There’s also her sharp wit and fair level of intelligence. Moreover, she has a genuine fondness for her classmates, striving to overcome their barriers and see who they are at their core. All this should combine to make her a shining star on the stand. Of course, she’ll get by with a little help from her friends … but that's for another post.

Anyway, I'm surprised more Danganronpa protag swaps don't account for the differences that their stars have from the actual protags. It's fun to think of how each character might use their own strengths to guide their approach to this kind of situation.

PREV: What Would Ibuki Be Like as the Main Character of SDR2?

NEXT: The Major Side Characters

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | Sanctimony (Boll, 2000)

Casper Van Dien's limitations as an actor I found a liability in his best known role in Starship Troopers. That movie was supposed to implicate us in its satire, and his woodenness meant that we could never quite identify with him. But here I think that quality works. This character is a sociopath, he's not all there, and Van Dien's woodenness, especially in his badly acted interrogation scene, plays into that. I'm not crazy enough to suggest that Uwe Boll is a better director than Paul Verhoeven, but I do think he makes better use of this one specific actor.

Van Dien is a trader who kills people for some mix of thrills and contempt for society, and he's contrasted with a working class cop played by Michael Pare, who basically fails to keep up with Van Dien until the latter starts shooting people on live TV. I won't pretend Boll is a great progressive filmmaker, but to his credit he does present both actors as objects of desire, Van Dien's body pored over with admiration in his racier scenes, and Pare being thirsted over during a nude photoshoot. (You see buttcrack but no hog.) Unfortunately, such enlightenment does not extend to the characterization of Jennifer Rubin as Pare's partner, who decides to use her feminine charm to trap Van Dien. Boll auteurists will also appreciate the presence of Eric Roberts, who plays his role as Pare's and Rubin's superior with little flash, although I suppose the guy has to be a bit quirky if he's gonna assign the two worst cops in the force to a high profile serial murder case.

Boll auteurists will also appreciate that he exercises his stylistic muscles more than usual here. There's a bit of Natural Born Killers inspired sensory overload, a pretty stylish scene at a shooting range (including a shot through a bullethole in a paper target and gunshot-punctuated editing), and a particularly tasty sequence where Pare navigates the labyrinthine basement of a club while enveloped in red and blue lighting and hissing steam, which plays like the dipshit Y2K equivalent of the creepy corridor scenes I love from classic gothic horror movies. This basement belongs to a club where they have some kind of bushido cage match for the enjoyment of the regular patrons and evil Germans making a BDSM snuff video underneath. Where is this club? So I can never visit it, of course.

Boll's weird blocking pops up too, to sometimes effective results. Van Dien's work setup is not a conventional trade floor, but a villainous lair that makes him look like an evil receptionist, where he takes videocalls resembling FMV games. He visits his favourite restaurant and seemingly gets the table right in the middle, which evokes the insularity of the circles he travels in. (There's another restaurant he visits that has a giant aquarium, and were I of his status, I would visit that one way more often because it looks way cooler.) Less sinister is a scene where Pare scrambles out of a crime scene like a Keystone Kop in the background while Van Dien in his car in the foreground makes an angry phone call that begins with "Do not sell, motherfucker!" and ends with "Now go pick up my dry cleaning."

I do think this movie suffers by not leaning hard enough into its premise. Van Dien doesn't get to kill nearly as often as you'd hope, and his rants are textureless "We live in a society" BS rather than the kind of "Get a job!" stuff you'd expect from a finance bro, so whatever societal rot he was hoping to explore through these acts of violence doesn't land. (Given the scene here with a trap, I do wonder if this stuff would have landed more had Boll made this a few years later in the context of both the torture porn era and the financial crisis.) That being said, if you're in the tank for the guy, there's enough good stuff here that this probably lands near the top of his filmography.

[kursed-arcana]

Fruits Basket Prelude Review

Fruits basket prelude. The values of modern times may change, but past media doesn’t.

The relationship of Kyoko and Katsuya is controversial amongst fans of the series, especially the anime onlies who flooded the fandom as result of the reboot. What is important to remember is that fruits basket is both a series from another culture, and another time. The 90s and early 2000s was a different time. Teens dating slightly older adults wasn't viewed the same way and the further back you go, the more common it was. From The Sound of Music, to Sabrina the Teenage Witch, you see it. Add in the fact japan is a different culture which changes at a different rate and you should get the picture. And for the record, the story is self aware enough where starting drama accomplishes nothing. Kyoko literally makes a Lolita complex joke at Katsuya's expense.

Let's all remember this is a work of fiction as well and enjoy the show. While we may relate to these characters and love them, they aren't real. And fiction is where we explore fantasy. A student teacher romance itself, being a popular romance story trope.

Before we tackle the prelude, let's address the recap and epilogue.

The recap, while unnecessary does provide some nice insight into kyo's point of view. For those of you who were dissatisfied with some creative liberties the final season took regarding kyo "forgetting" his connection to Tohru and Kyoko, despite it being clear through out the earlier seasons and even during the final itself, that he didn't, this clarifies that he simply tried to put it in a box and not think about it. Is it a lazy retcon because TMS got called our for their bs and realized they created plot discrepancies that weren't there? Probably but we'll never know for sure. At best this recap serves the purpose of emotionally prepping the viewer to cry during the movie and reintroduce the context regarding kyo's bond to Kyoko. Something that wouldn't have been necessary if they final season was given the full season order it needed.

At worst, it's just a cheap and pointless time killer eat up runtime while barely spending any money. It's also a minimalistic approach to trying to restore the emotional impact this background story had during the manga and how the later content would play off this tension, both during Kyo and Tohru's character arcs. Not that tms / production committee saw much value in those, despite them being the protagonist and love interest.

Now Takaya sensei hear our pain about the final season rushing though content and not properly delivering the resolution to character arcs and the story. And she took this opportunity to provide a nugget of joy to anime and manga fans alike. That's right, a new brief epilogue from therapist. I mean mangaka.

While the epilogue is brief, it hits all the right notes. It builds on Tohru and Kyo’s graveside conversation and shows a glimpse at their married life. The happy couple is living their best lives, working hard, panning a trip back to the family and being all lovey dovey. Its everything tms cut out of the main series. It's thrilling to see some of the sweet kyoru content we deserved. Thank you sensei.  You never fail to deliver when you're needed. Now please pick up that pen and get back to Liselotte. If you're truly done with furuba and furuba another your fans need you elsewhere.

So let's dive in to prelude now. Katsuya Honda is an interning student teacher and the fantastic woman we all know and love, Kyoko, is a middle school senior. Their paths cross at a time where Kyoko is young, rebellious and emotionally volatile. She is the crimson butterfly, the girl gang member feared by her peers, and underneath her tough as nails facade, is just a broken girl from an unhappy home.

This is the story about how this girl became the emotional pillar that helped save Arisa, Kyo and of course Tohru. And the person who saved her? That's right, Katsuya Honda. He saw in Kyoko, the same emotions he hid beneath a mask of his own and when she broke down and cried, he fell in love. It was her raw honesty that reached him. And while their situations may have been different, they were still quite similar.

While she had chosen to put on a tuff girl act and gall in with a bad crows in order to hide her pain, he had chosen to give into the demands of his controlling and judgmental family and put on the act of the dutiful and obedient son. Even his decision to pursue teaching was in order to please those around him, be they family or the expectations of the other teachers. You can see the moments he drops his mask. He removes his glasses (which are fake and part of his facade) and swiftly flips the switch into a dark prince type character. He takes Kyoko pointing out his bad behavior as a compliment every time. Because she sees the real him along with the fake him and enjoys it. Just like how he sees value in both versions of her.

 The two of them spent many lunch breaks chatting and growing closer. She never once attended his class. Even after he revealed he would be leaving the school and not pursuing education, she couldn't bring herself to face her peers judgement by entering a classroom. But luckily for her this twisted teacher wanted to keep meeting her.

His belief in her, reach her. It helped guide her to a better path. And helped teach her that she is worthy of love. But this better path and desire to change was held back by her past. Her decision to leave her gang, stole her opportunity to attend high school and got her disowned by her family. But luckily for her, Katsuya provided the home she needed and with the blessing of her father who just wanted her gone, married her.

We spend just enough time witnessing and enjoying their life together to become attached to their bond, their marriage and their parenting before tragedy strikes and Katsuya abruptly passess away. It leaves you wanting more, a feeling painfully shared by Kyoko as she is reduced to an empty shell of the woman she was before. She falls into so much darkness that she essentially forgets about Tohru entirely.

This story is as much a commentary on societal expectations as it is a romance. Both Katsuya and Kyoko were forced to hide behind masks as they came from two very different, but very troubled homes. They were judged by their family, each others families, their peers, but with the support of Katsuya's father who had lightened up after the death of his wife, they were able to move forward, determined to prove everyone who judged their relationship wrong.

"Show them you are happy because you are together"

That’s right people, even within the story their relationship is judged as wrong. And anyone who is looking at furuba as some black and white morality story seriously needs to rewatch it again. After katsuya's death,  insults at hurled at Kyoko by both his family and her own father. And while the movie didn't show it, the anime did reveal that they even insulted tohru, choosing to say hurtful things like she probably isn't even Katsuya's son. We spent 40 minutes on a recap but couldn't even have crucial content like that put in cause reasons.

Now I want to take the time to discuss something very important. The poor planning of the series that tore the final season to pieces is not solved through this movie alone. And the poor planning continues here. The time spent on the 40 minute recap, could of easily been spent animating content that directly ties into Kyoko's death. Kakeru's arc and connection to Tohru were repeatedly foreshadowed throughout the second season. Manga spoilers follow, so please only continue if you're OK with that. This would of been the perfect opportunity to fix one of the biggest mistakes of the final season, which was not adapting the content revealing what this connection was. Kakeru's girlfriend, Komaki, who was also mentioned several times, is the daughter of the man who killed Kyoko with his car. He attended Kyoko's funeral and went off on tohru for acting like she was the only person who lost someone in that accident (all before Komaki could nock some sense into him). An act that would play a part in Tohru beginning to hide her grief behind her happy go lucky attitude for most of the series. The final season did Tohru's background and character arc a disservice in many ways, and while this movie at least restores some of it, it does not fully deliver or resolve the issues with the final season.

I'll see you guys when tms and the production committee come back for more ovas, movies or whatever else they decide to do to bleed more money out of us. There's still entire chapters that were left unadapted and plenty of half chapters and skipped scenes, so here's hoping for a director's cut. Otherwise, be sure to check out the manga. You won't regret it. The story deserves the be told infull and that's the only way to experience it as of now.

And for anyone wondering if they'll adapt furuba another, the sequel series, kakeru and komaki's child is a player, so it shouldn't be adapted without a proper adaptation of their story arc.

Please make sure to like my review on mal

And if some of you'd be interested in hearing more of my thoughts, please let me know. I had a lot more I wanted to say but thought it was already pretty long for a review. I'm more then happy to write a bit more analysis though if asked.

And please excuse typos. I'm still doing everything from my phone. I held onto this review for over a week to make corrections but got lazier the more time went by.

[matchstickdolly]

Lucifer 5B: Cutting off Touch to Spite Your Fans

Spoiler warning: This post assumes you've watched all of Lucifer, season 5, part B.

CW: There's plenty I like about season 5, but this is a negative post. I know not everyone is up for negativity about the things they love. I also generally avoid it and (try to) keep my mouth shut about things I don’t like in most spaces. It’s good etiquette. But this is my space, and I have thoughts specifically about purity culture and the treatment of sexuality and trauma in fiction. You’ve been warned!

---

I'm a professional writer (not in TV). I've worked with enough bad clients, editors, and other writers to recognize some hallmark behaviors in how both Fox and Netflix gave Lucifer's writers incredibly difficult, unfair, and frankly weird situations to create through.

Fox did them dirty, interfering and ordering too many eps in S3. Netflix did them dirty, ordering 10 eps for S4 when it clearly needed ~13. Then Netflix ordered 10 "final" eps for S5—then, just kidding(!), 6 more after they'd done their writing for the 10. (What the fuck?) And then Netflix ordered 10 more for a "final-final" S6 after the writers had done their best to tell their whole story in S5. (MORE what the fuck.)

Talk about whiplash for creators, and half of those who consume content don't even care to understand such creative pain.

So, there are problems on multiple fronts. There's much I'll forgive writers, accordingly. I go into most shows expecting plotting/pacing issues. I look, instead, for characters and relationships that will triumph over those issues.

Heart is what the show Lucifer has always had in spades, both in its characters and in the immensely committed, wonderful ways the actors have tried to realize the characters' humor, love, trauma, and���most importantly—struggle to find healing. Yet, when given the opportunity to show health alongside another in a relationship, the writers/directors of 5B chose to remove most sexual humor and physical intimacy from their female lead and bi/pan characters to, I feel, sanitize them and troll fans. What happened?

Well, for one, say hi to showrunner Joe Henderson bragging about how the writers decided to be colossal dicks to the fans who helped secure their jobs:

From CBR's 'Lucifer Showrunner Joe Henderson Dissects Season 5B's Chaos'

Have we not suffered sidelined/repressed female characters, "bury your gays," and, oh, Chloe fucking a serial killer enough? Must we also say hello to neutered relationships once characters find stable love (whether same or opposite sex)? The result of withdrawing more sexual humor and physical intimacy from paired characters is an uncomfortable suggestion that they're reformed by "pure" love—more chaste and aloof, more acceptable in polite society. This is only done to end-game committed relationships.*

The writers seem to think they're edging the viewers, but the reality is they're taking traumatized minority characters who rejoiced in sexual freedom, but lacked and craved an emotional connection, and showing they can't have both, or, if they find both, it will never last. They've taken hypersexual characters and said, here, even they can have the love and commitment they desire, but some physical intimacy, especially sexual intimacy, is what they must trade for it.

There's always one more case, phone call, or coincidence interrupting intimacy. Traumas or deaths deserving emotional and physical comfort go on to receive none or only one aspect. Done sometimes, it's fine. Done always, it's sick. Dan dies, and there's no hugging? Really?†

Don't craft characters who crave a full range of emotional and physical intimacy, only to rob them of related scenes every chance you get. That's not complexity. That's bad writing. To even achieve this in 5B, they must squash banter and sideline their female lead yet again.

What a gift to purity culture, which tells us to be more palatable by bottling and buttoning up. That sex should be taboo, but violence glorified. That there is no heated desire among "Good Women," that sexual minorities of all genders shouldn't experience it much at all.

5A is so good. At the very least, it's on the right path (clearly, since the plot payoff from 5x01 to 5x16 is great). It shows a couple working through difficulties and trauma, toward each other emotionally and physically. It even pokes fun at people who think an established relationship means the death of romantic and sexual appeal (a tired and hugely sexist trope). And then... And then 5B reverses that, pretending established relationships are barely physical during emotional struggle and that the honeymoon phase doesn't exist. It robs characters of joy and comfort through physical intimacy when they need it to move through or push beyond trauma.

It's telling that so many fan wishes for Deckerstar are about healing touch and existing in each other's spaces: amending Chloe's spicy PDA history with Cain, Chloe caring for Lucifer's wings, soft family scenes a la Monopoly night and shared meals, morning-afters, etc. Reasonable fans aren't asking for porn; they're asking for connection and humanity. They're asking for writers not to forget characters (and, yes, including hypersexual characters) on their way from Point A to Point B.

That 5B lacks these things isn't a "tee-hee frustrating" slow burn or a cockblock. It is, in so many scenes, excising from characters a core part of what nearly every human and fictional monster craves. And it's a slap in the face to the "found family" trope. When you remove or tamp down a casual physical intimacy that was previously there, characters and their relationships fall flat, even if only partially. They become blunt weapons creators wield against watchers or readers begging for scraps of warmth.

Minorities shouldn't be killed off with ease, and they shouldn't be stifled with ease, either.‡ And maybe there shouldn't be deep trauma driving a wedge in a romantic relationship if you're not going to explore it through that relationship, too—physical intimacy included.

I'm still reserving some judgment. I loved the family drama and the end. (Although, again, where was the physical intimacy? No intimacy when Chloe or Lucifer return from the dead? Really?) I see where they could do awesome things, and could have done more if not for network BS.

But I no longer trust Lucifer's writers and directors. They thought S5 was the end. And what they gave us of Deckerstar, of the relationship that symbolizes health and healing in their fictional world, is this: cold distance. And they got a kick out of doing it, apparently.

If this is a "love letter" to me as a fan, I'm burning it. I can only hope S6 course corrects. If not, the writers who made these choices shouldn't write sexual minority and/or traumatized characters again. If you don't understand most of us, you should stop fucking using us.

---

* If you don't believe me about the differences between casual/short-term relationships and end-game relationships in Lucifer, go back and look at how Lucifer and Maze are with strangers in all the other seasons. Look at Chloe's sex dream, her propositioning of Lucifer in a library, her sex with Pierce in the evidence closet. Look at how much physical intimacy there is between Lucifer and Eve, and then between Eve and Maze (if only as a ploy). Across seasons, there are sex/kink jokes and scenes galore.

Compare this to how these same characters are portrayed when with their end-game loves. Notice the gentle pecks on the lips and the huge general drop in sexual humor between 5A and 5B. How boring. Where's the spice these characters had? Also, give me a damn break. Buttoning up in a relationship is contrary to four and a half seasons of emotional character work that's been communicating security in our relationships is personally freeing.

† I'm not just talking about sexual intimacy in this post, though that is a big part of it because of the characters. 5B lacked crucial found family scenes, too.

Chloe should have been at God's family dinner, but being so would have prevented more ham-fisted angst. Chloe never even has a one-on-one with God, probably because that would demand a straight answer about her miracle status, which I would guess will be used to drive yet another wedge between her and Lucifer next season, but we'll see.

In multiple before- and after-work scenes, there was no reason for Lucifer and Chloe to be apart more, even, than they were in S1 and S2. Monopoly night was in S3, for crying out loud. Most horrifying of all? No one touches Chloe after Dan's death, but Trixie. Meanwhile, Linda, Amenadiel, Ella, Maze, and Lucifer all receive physical comfort. No wonder Chloe's tired of being strong.

‡ If you don't think it's offensive that they stuffed all their wlw content for two hypersexual characters into a few clunky, irrational, and chaste scenes that rushed I love yous, a marriage-like proposal, and the mention of soulmates, I don't know what to tell you other than get off my lawn.

[wolfhowlingdragonflyingsirensong]

Veronica Mars season 5

So I just finished the VM movie, and I still have season four to go on, but hear me out, if I was rich I would produce season five (I already know season four' stupid ending) and it would have:

-First of all, Logan is alive, and to go with a cliché, he has amnesia. He could have been picked up by his coworkers in his shadowy job at the time of the accident and is back to work, so he is still "competent" to do the job but really doesn't remember anything. If anyone wants to see snarky Logan back, that's a great way to do it. And it also provides an excellent opportunity for the blue flashbacks every VM fan loves. Trina could come back too! And we could revisit every single LoVe moment in Neptune.

- Second, I would like the show to wrap the Castle storyline. Maybe start with Jake being murdered and Clarence being the one that has been accused with a lot of evidence? He has to ask V and Keith for help, and that would provide a lot of funny moments, but they would help him because they know he couldn't have killed Jake. There could be lots of adrenaline moments, like season 1 ending, with Veronica escaping from all the bad guys from the Castle.

I would like the killer to be Gory Sorokin, because I think he was a cool villain and it wasn't over with Veronica's revenge and his own against Logan. I want Logan and Keith and Veronica and Wallace to save the day. But I also want to have bitchy Celeste back, and Duncan!!!! I would like for Logan and Duncan to reunite because we didn't see a goodbye scene for them. While Veronica and Duncan's story was well done, I think a hug or something with Duncan's daughter appearing would be nice. Plus, some Lily moments would be the perfect ending.

- Third, there would be more Wallace, Keith, Logan, and Weevil storylines. The show was more interesting for me when everyone had their own thing going, and Wallace and Keith, and Logan were a great part of why I loved the show so much.

Wallace was someone with a strong compass moral, who wasn't afraid to call Veronica on her bs, and who was a badass of his own, so not giving him more screentime is a crime. And he would be perfect to show how you can be a badass and still have a happy family. And it would be nice to see Wallace's family once again, his mother, his dad, his little brother, etc. I would like for Wallace to see corruption at work and fight against it with the help of V and the others AND his family.

Keith, oh my beloved Keith. The show was at its peak when Keith was shown as a good father, a smart P.I. with his own cases who was actually some steps ahead of his teenage daughter instead of having him being the typical useless adult, and with his own life. I would like Keith to be able to enter a romantic relationship with someone, maybe reunite him with Alicia, and I would like for him to still kick ass. We have already seen how Keith risks life, limb, and career for Veronica, and while I would like to see that again, I would like to see Veronica this time doing it for her dad. To me, Veronica Mars is more than two characters, but at its core, their bond is one of the most important things. And I want Keith to finally hug Logan like he should have done in season one and have grandchildren.

Eli Navarro, what can I say, I want better treatment for him. I want him to finally be able to be happy and to actually be acknowledged as a friend of Logan and Keith, and for Veronica and Eli to hug a little more. My best boi deserves a happy life and to kick some ass. And I think after what Celeste did there could be some importance for him in the Kane plot.

- There could be another storyline in which someone is offing Neptune high students, so there would be many happy returns. Mostly, I want Jackie to come back! Jackie was a great character very underutilized, and it would be awesome for her to come back.

If Meg wasn't dead I would like her to return but alas :(

I would like Corny to come back, he was so underrated and I love him! Plus he was always funny. Butters and Clemmons are other characters that I would like to make a comeback to. TBH, I would like for all the students and professors to make a comeback.

OF COURSE, Mac should come back because it's Mac.

- Another plot to be tied is Keith finally locking up the Fitzpatricks. I would even like Kendall coming back, because no body = no death, and it would be awesome because she's such an interesting character and to get her own revenge.

- If there is an obligation for deaths, my pick would go to Leo, Dick, or Piz. Now, I don't hate any of these characters, but it would provide a general sense of pain and it could be heroic.

If Piz were to appear I think he should be fleshed out more, AND NO MORE ROMANCE BETWEEN HIM AND V just giving the character his own arc and romantic relationships, same with Leo. I like Piz more than Leo so I wouldn't want Piz to die but alas.

- I think Veronica Mars was more interesting when it focused on the differences between the rich, the normal class and the poor, and for people who felt like pariahs, so it would be nice a return to those themes.

-Ending: all plots solved with their obscurity behind and a new sun is rising on Neptune, Mars little children playing detectives because it's in their blood, and everyone is happy. A love letter for the dedicated fans.

[homophobicpunz]

beet’s c!punz fic recs! (updated as of 3/20 in reblog)

i went though all 30 pages of the punz tag on ao3 to find the good stuff amongst all the fics where hes a side character and the weird shit so you dont have to :)

everything here is gen and dream smp. its all pain and suffering, im not sorry 

friends in uncanny places (1,940 words) | ghost!punz & ghostbur - ghost boys bonding with a touch of angst. memory loss is fun! 

why is it still raining (1,298 words) | ghost!punz - based on the short "rain" by jack stauber which i did not realize initially so it hit me like a truck 

remorse (1,648 words) | punz & dream - punz copes very badly with being a killer for hire 

knife in my back  (1,083 words, incomplete) | punz decides he’s done with dream’s bs and switches sides, set right after the end of tommy’s exile arc

the death of a martyr (1,255 words) | punz realizes he cant kill for dream anymore - warning for implied suicide 

aftermath (970 words) | punz feels conflicted about doing what dream would want - warning for graphic violence and mercy killing

and of course, my own fic: i’d do it again (3,107 words) | punz & sam - punz lets sam accidently on purpose beat the shit out of him 

-- these next fics aren’t punz centric, but he plays a big role so im including them

i wanna put a magic bullet in my bed (1,519 words) | ranboo centric, ranboo & punz & awesamdude - ranboo has a really bad panic attack, punz and sam help 

i don’t know you, but i think i’d like to (1,535 words) | second person, purpled centric, purpled & punz - immediate aftermath of... something. you don’t remember 

what do you mean (i’m sorry by the way) (1,798 words) | dream centric, dream & punz & awesamdude - dream is fucked up but sam and punz are there for him 

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

What type of kids do you think the ikevamp guys would be if they went to high school?

Oh boy HERE WE GO

(Under a cut bc this post is a Long Boi^TM)

Napoleon. Would prbly be that kid that’s like somehow bafflingly in the top ten of his class but nobody ever sees him??? Like he’s always late to school or napping in the quietest places on campus (they found him in a locker once and the school was laughing about it for WEEKS bc he insisted he was just chillin, and it wasn’t like a bullying incident he just wanted to sleep LMAO). Surprisingly amiable? A lot of people are afraid of him at first but he’s just so casual and direct, he gains quite a few friends (and a good number of girls have a crush on him--he always diverts the attention of skeevy guys). Good friends with Jeanne because they fence together a lot, and people are always baffled at how easily they chat

Mozart. Where do I begin. Number one in his class, perfectionist prick. That one kid that’s a known prodigy and that everyone hates for his impeccable grades and musical talent. Always gets the solos and conducting roles in the school performances. He knows how to play a crowd--will always be sweet and cherubic in front of teachers. But when it’s just the students? All gloves are off. Frigid and incendiary, will not take any shit and will tear you apart with words in milliseconds. Do not cross. He will end your entire life and self-esteem, it’s not worth it. Has a few friends, and they often experience the disdain of jealous students--but they’re all steadfast about defending him. And Mozart will not tolerate it if people are mistreating his friends, he’s an iron wall of defense; to be his friend means to always have someone looking out for you, make no mistake. He and Jeanne often grab food together after practice and ask about each others day, they hella close but never really show it while school’s on--their class schedules are worlds apart bc of their grades, and at lunch they’re usually practicing/doing hw. When they hug it out at graduation and pat each other on the back everyone nearly falls the fuck out of their chair LMFAO

Leonardo. That kid that 100% could probably be in the top fifty of his class but just can’t be bothered to give a damn. Always argues points with his teachers and plays devil’s advocate until they are inches from exploding at him. Always the one to mercifully make class feel shorter with his absolute distraction-heavy shitfuckery (and sometimes you really learn something because of his line of thinking). He's a dumbass but like harmless, essentially. Used to be the perfect student^TM and then decided the system was bullshit and he wanted no part of it, thinks public education can kiss his ass. Nobody knows it since he asks people not to talk about it, but he tutors kids after school for hours--has brought kids from Ds to Bs. He always dodges nosy people, never goes to parties, and finds ways to intervene around kids that are struggling with smth (with ninja stealth of course). Despite how easily he laughs and chats with just about anyone, he’s...actually surprisingly v much a lone wolf. Only ever consistently hangs out with the heartthrob rich kid, but nobody understands why???? And they’re always roasting each other wtf, are they even friends????

Comte. Pretty boy genius, always in the top five of his class though doesn’t seem too worried about it or obsessed with rank as students often are. It’s more that his parents have high expectations for his future as their heir, so he tends to fall in line with it. Born into money but somehow....not an asshole??? He doesn’t really like showing off, tries to be quiet about his accomplishments but his parents won’t really allow it--and he’s the star of the soccer team so it can be hard to hide. Most often the one at a party trying to help people sober up (always designated driver) or hearing his friends out when they have a problem. Has never publicly tried to bust heads, but some of the guys in the school insist he’s got a dark side--probably because he threatened them (passive aggressively) within an inch of their lives for being disgusting to girls. But nobody believes them bc...I mean look at him, does that look like a threat?? He just bought that kid’s lunch for christ’s sake. TONS of girls ask him out and confess their feelings, and he always lets them down as gently as he can--conceivably doesn’t like anyone himself, as far as the student body knows. Like Leonardo he’s v amiable, but also manages to reveal nothing personal while getting close. Leonardo’s the only one that’s managed to scratch the surface, and the kid won’t leave him alone for some godforsaken reason. And yet, he seems to enjoy their minutes of banter more than the hours of time spent with “friends”

Arthur. Oh boy. Good lord. Well. He used to be a sweetheart that would always seek out the mousier students and bring them into discussion/involve them on the playground. But alas, Teenage Jadedness^TM hit him like a train and now he’s an incorrigible flirt and believes no single person can be good deep down (somebody get this bitch some eyeliner). Believes the world will always be a cruel and unfeeling place where victims are never heard, so he just kind of goes full skeptical and bitter (think Sylvain for those of you that are FE fans). Has fun with every girl he sees (usually dating several girls at once) and doesn’t much care for his grades, but somehow has perfect scores in English?? He insists it’s because he needs to keep his seduction game on par with the voices of older legends before him, but some of the girls that see him in the library from time to time--v serious--are struck by how attractive he is in such deep focus, entirely uncharacteristic of his nosy and boisterous behavior in the halls (can often be seen whirling around Isaac like a bird of prey while our little baby robin Isaac stiffly tries to get away from him, and Dazai often joins to make things even more chaotic bc why not? In reality they just love this feisty kid that never gives up on what’s right, even though they’ve both given up trying themselves)

Dazai. He’s one of those kids that like does weed regularly but is also like...alarmingly insightful?? Like those kids I was always told to avoid, but now and again I would have conversations with out of necessity and was just...kinda shook. I mean granted he’s a little weird but he’s fairly harmless?? He’s like a class clown but on a massive scale--there’s nobody in the place that doesn’t know who he is, that haven’t heard tales of his exploits (he always comes in through the windows and gets detention for it a lot, and he even brought a chicken with him to school once????) nobody gets what he’s doing at any moment (don’t even know if he does really, chaotic mofo) and honestly nobody wants to know they just do the side eye meme when he appears or laughs. The teachers lament his untapped potential or just hate him for making their lives an even bigger headache than usual, and his grades are...yeah let’s not look at those. Organized the senior prank with absolute GLEE, and it was talked about for ages after he was gone--an inspiration chaotic bastards everywhere

Theodorus. (I hate.......that I pictured him in those like Vineyard Vine white boy clothes.......for the record its mostly bc his parents force him to wear them). All business. This kid doesn’t have time for your bullshit, will absolutely walk away if you’re boring him or seeking social clout. Popular because he’s hot and has a mean streak a mile wide, all the girls that didn’t like Mozart for being ethereal and effeminate boomeranged to find Theo ready to fulfill their hopes and dreams. They only grow more feral when rumors of him actually being fairly nice one on one--and telling creeps to fuck off of vulnerable girls at parties--start to circulate. (If he isn’t with Vincent, Arthur is probably near. Nobody understands how the two are brothers????) Van Gogh name apparently is just “I can be your angel or i can be your devil” and no one understands how... Grades are average and he’s plenty capable, most of his time is spent working after school because his parents refuse to provide Vincent with any artistic materials (canvas, paints, etc). They ask him to go to parties more, but he only goes to piss his parents off (he’s v lowkey punk and it’s understandably sexy of him). Will literally only listen to Vincent, and got in a looooot of trouble after getting into a fistfight with Shakespeare. Only stopped because his parents blamed Vincent for the incident, and Vincent apologized and went quiet for days ;-;

Vincent. Always been quiet and shy, but he doesn’t dislike ppl--he just has a hard time speaking up now and again. His parents always talk over him and tell him nothing he has to say has any real value, so he tends to struggle with a lot of self-doubt. Not isolated because he’s not likeable, it’s more because people tend to take advantage of his mild and earnest nature--until Theo runs them off. He’s on amiable terms with most people but has no real, true friends and it makes him feel lonely a lot. Mostly copes with the emotional turmoil by painting as much as he can. His grades are average, he does reliably well but can often be found daydreaming or distracted. Theo tends to escort him everywhere because of his propensity to attract danger (namely Shakespeare) or walk into things cuz he’s in his head a lot. A few of the artsier girls and the quiet academic girls have HUGE crushes on him (he’s softspoken, sweet, and calm; come on now), but he’s so distant--and honestly nice to everyone in equal measure--that they don’t have much hope of it coming to fruition. This kid deadass doesn’t think a single girl would ever like him that way so he’s just c:???????? when Theo talks about “those nosy harpies coming after my brother”

Jeanne. EDGY MCEDGE. Isn’t amazing in the academic department, but he’s a killer fencer--the rallying cry of the entire team. He became leader his sophomore year and he’s pretty much the only reason they keep destroying at tournaments throughout the year. Despite the pervasive interest in him he intimidates most people away with his swift intensity and ironclad stoicism. Silent as a grave and very still, people are convinced he’s the Grim Reaper reincarnated (listen he’s juST A DUTIFUL BABIE N O). If he isn’t fencing or practicing, Isaac often offers him help in the library after school hours in one of the study rooms (can’t be seen who’s inside from the outside). The two develop a kind of uncanny bond; they’re both so...bad at human-ing that they find a lot of comfort in the atmosphere they create. There’s none of the bullshit grandstanding or clout obsession, just them genuinely trying to help each other (yes Jeanne absolutely teaches Isaac self-defense moves in order to crush the kids that pick on him, and Jeanne often either glares or outright threatens those students when Isaac isn’t looking). Only ever smiles or feels understood when he’s hanging out with Mozart, so he cherishes the time Mozart offers him to hang (he knows the kid is busy up to his eyeballs and under a ton of pressure by comparison, his parents don’t care much as long as they can brag about his fencing records)

Isaac. Mega nerd that just...does not know how to interact. Only understands math and DESTROYS in competitive math club, but otherwise is always alone at lunch or just in the library. A little bean pole because he doesn’t look after himself very well (neglects to eat a lot) and can sometimes be found asleep on his books. If approached he will be very thorny, doesn’t have any friends to speak of and trusts everyone about as far as he can throw them. Yells at Arthur and Dazai a lot when they flock around him, and has gotten into his fair share of fights. Never starts fights, but will finish them. People are surprised he can hold his own, and he comes away with blood that ain’t his. There are a few girls that are curious about him, but its mostly the ones that have seen his awkward thoughtfulness in club--or the girls that are sick of the assholes and appreciate how stalwart he is. He really just wants to be left in peace (his parents never show up to his meets or when he wins academic awards, and the few teachers that notice are pretty concerned abt his reactivity and complete lack of social savvy...) Leonardo always helps him sneak in at night to look at the stars on the school roof

Shakespeare is p much the like “kid most anticipated to be in jail as soon as they’re out of high school” He just. Has that like...serial killer vibe??? Idk if I’m explaining this well but he was that guy that would always cling to genuinely compassionate girls just trying to be nice like a LEECH, and would never fucking shut up if he did or didn’t get attention. You just can't win with this kid. Probably wanted to kill the kids that made fun of him or at the very least wanted to lash out against the confident/popular/nice kids. Only liked you if he didn’t deem you a threat, or if you didn’t make him insecure, or if you tolerated him (aka Vincent. Vincent PLEASE stop trying to reach out to dangerous ppl....I love you too much to watch this shit...) He admitted as much to Theo and the kid went livid with rage and pummeled him into the ground, though most of the rest of the student body doesn’t know quite what happened. (Theo refuses to explain to anyone, and just walks away if asked). Shakespeare will just change the subject endlessly and make passive aggressive threats until the person leaves if they try to bring it up. The only time the entire class has EVER seen Leonardo mad is when Shakespeare kept tailing this girl that wanted no part of him

Sebastian. Nerdy like Isaac, but is more of the silent observer type. Like Theo, doesn't want any part of the bullshit but won't be as blunt or outspoken about it, he's only open about it if pressed or pissed off. Doesn't have much patience for the clique-driven nature of high school and tends to take an interest in the people who stand out beyond the mind-numbing drama. Also is in the top fifty but studies like a lunatic, and can often be seen asking Comte for tips now and again. Has tried talking to Mozart and admires his talents, but Mozart gives a cold shoulder that would put Antarctica to shame. (Leonardo tries to ninja him into taking breaks but never succeeds). Has a great deal of disdain for the troublemakers (Arthur and Dazai) but doesn't intervene, just watches shit go down and sighs. Probably the most normal(?) one of the bunch, just does his best and keeps his head down