#its about. the romantic implications of wanting to consume and be consumed.

[doribuki]

hey have you guys read @sharkodactyl's fic Watersong yet if not you should its pretty great. and im not saying that because its saved me from sheer mental collapse multiple times. im normal about that fic. i promise.

[ilynpilled]

That post about the concept of deserving when it comes to ASOIAF makes me think of the arguments about Jaime deserving Brienne

i mean i obviously hold the same opinion on that whole conversation too. this is a fictional story where relationships serve a thematic purpose. i can understand doylist criticism of certain trends in grrm’s writing (like the age gaps), but i personally will never give a shit about what a character “deserves” because they are not real people. they are tools to tell a story. brienne being a good person doesn’t mean her romantic arc being with an ideal/perfect partner that “deserves her” or whatever would make an interesting fictional story. jb is extremely thematically central as a relationship when it comes to exploring gender, constructs of beauty and ugliness, the battle between cynicism vs idealism, and synthesis when it comes to interrogating knighthood and its deeper existential meanings in the context of the text. if you take out the uglier parts of it then that story is no longer there, or the story is not as strong. i like jb bc i think it is a very thematically functioning dynamic, that is also very interesting to follow in canon. and i like the dynamic at a surface level too. i am fine with ppl who do not like it or care for it, but this brand of criticism means nothing to me personally. if you want more ugly female characters to be given romantic arcs that is understandable, which would mean a diversification of relationship dynamics, but this is one example with a specific intent, and it excels at that in my eyes.

[vidavalor]

Hey lovely.

Had a bit of a rabbit hole about Cheneval wine I thought I'd share.

I was thinking about Aziraphale's bad French and possibly one of the reasons he was so confused is because in 1760 due to a lot of political and economic unrest, mainly peasants but a lot a lot of people were moving around France in search of work and new opportunities/conditions. This led to a lot of…shall we say melanging of regional dialects but also a lot of encountering colloquials and variations in language which could make things quite confusion. Encountering many slight variation in pronunciations and meanings can lead to a lot of stumbling and learning on the spot and confusion.

There was also, from the 1600s-1800s ESP a whole lot of France trying to take over neighbor kingdoms/countries. I'm not going to go into the history of the Kingdom of Holland, the Netherlands, Belgium, Luxembourg, Switzerland etc.

But suffice to say during this time there was a lot of French and French colloquialisms also melanging with neighboring Germanic languages.

Anyway long story short.

We've got some melanging.

Chene (where's my circumflex hmph) in French means Oak. Biblically Oaks represent strength of faith.

Val in French is Valley

Now.

One interpretation could be a valley, or a drop off, a lessening of faith.

In Dutch. Val means to fall. As in a devastating fall. The kind of fall of an Angel falling to Hell.

Chene can also colloquially/regionally/melangically in France, esp at that time, refer to variations on the words for "Chain" as well as "I don't" or "I'm not."

Which is great because you can turn that into some sort of nod to if you have strength in your faith you won't fall.

Or, it could mean you are connected/linked to someone who did fall.

Or. Also. Either a funny nod to "I didn't really fall..."

I find it interesting symbolism that Aziraphale did not accept that offer of a glass of wine from Crowley. But a somewhat easy refusal that matched those thousands of years of "you are fallen" and we can't be fraternizing because of our "jobs" with the "I'm at work."

It kind of mirrors the FF to me...like "stay here or run away just be with me," and the "I have to 'work' - you go inside / 'I have to work, come with me to Heaven.'

Which. To be honest. It's like. Aziraphale is doing all of this "work" to set up his ball so that he can, ultimately, try to get them out of their debacle with Heaven and Hell and confess his love to Crowley/be with Crowley.

And then he has to go to "work" in Heaven....also, ultimately, so he can stop the Heaven and Hell bullshit and be with Crowley.

But I like the sort of ambiguity of it all. I'm kind of attached to the idea that Crowley offering Aziraphale glass of wine is him offering that link/chain to Him/the fallen.

And even though Aziraphale doesn't take it....because he has things to do....Crowley holds onto it, consumes it, accepts that Aziraphale is being the responsible one trying to fix things, goes on to defend Aziraphale against Jimbriel....not being angry at Aziraphale for taking care of Jim so much as he is angry at the entire situation and taking it out on Jimbriel because Jimbriel represents the establishment, the whole damn Heaven/Hell bullshit, that Aziraphale is still trying to fix. Because let's be real. Crowley is having a hard time handling it/figuring out what to do. Bbygrl is just sitting there drinking. In FF wanting to run away to Alpha Centauri. Aziraphale is the one who's making the hard choice....having to give up the lovely romantic glass of wine dinner date so that he can fix things. Because nobody else is going to do it.

And the fact that he doesn't say 'No' to the glass of wine lmao. Just says "I'm at work." Sort of....I'm not refusing it per se, I'm telling you I have responsibilities / duties now.

Then the FF 'Tell me you said no' and no direct response to that from Aziraphale... Its the same thing. He never says "I don't want to." And I think the implication there is that he doesn't have a choice. Anyway. I'm not great at these. But that's where I got before I had to stop myself from going further down the rabbit holes.

Hi right back at you! 😍 Apologies for the long response time. OMG word nerdery in my inbox?! Is it Christmas?! This is such a treat! *bounces and rubs hands together* Let's do this! Oh, right, yes, snacks, of course! Kitchen's open. You clearly know your way around this blog so you're cleared to go through the fridge & have whatever strikes ya fancy. 😊

I love your thoughts & had fun doing some digging for a response. I've some more to add about word stuff related to oaks and some stuff about the Monsieur Rossignol scene that you might find interesting beneath the wonderful excuse you've given us for a Crowley-at-Marguerite's gif.

re: The French lessons in 1760-- I think you're correct about the melanging being why it's 1760 that Aziraphale chooses for year in this line. What you're talking about with the wild changes of language in the decades prior to that would definitely work with that. It shows the extent of Aziraphale's devotion to learning and making a study of French, in particular, that he took lessons-- and I do believe that he did actually take the lessons, despite what else I'm going to say about that scene.

There's always both the literal and the figurative/euphemistic layers in their speak, just as there is on the show as a whole. There's crepes and then there's crepes and there's sushi and there's sushi and I think the French lessons thing is that there were French classes and then there were French classes. Your melanging is likely why Aziraphale chose 1760 for the line but he's been, erm, making a study of French both long before and for ages since. Aziraphale took French lessons in 1760 but he also went to Monsieur Rossignol's night classes then and I'm pretty sure those are not exactly the same things. 😉

"You speak every language in the world. We both do."

Crowley is basically like: Angel, we both get off on words and speak every language on the planet, including the one we invented and flirt in constantly. Thoughts on why you're seducing me this morning en Francais? To which Aziraphale replies:

As others have pointed out, Rossignol is the French word for nightingale. The famous family of cryptographers who built the secret code that protected French state secrets for generations is the Rossignol family and they are the reason why the word doesn't just mean nightingale in French but also a skeleton key. In Good Omens, one of the skeleton keys to Crowley and Aziraphale's speak and to the use of language in general-- the master keys that unlock the other doors-- is nightingales. I call their speak Ineffable Husbands Speak in posts but nightingales appears to be basically their word for it.

I wrote a thing recently about how Aziraphale is using "Prof Hoff" in wordplay in 1941 to actually be referring to Crowley. I'm inclined to think he's doing the same thing in this scene with Monsieur Rossignol and that his Mr. Nightingale is Crowley. It's also a fun bit of gender-related humor because he refers to him as Monsieur Rossignol and their mentions night classes. 😊 Monsieur, literally translated in French, is also "my lord" and mmm hot blasphemy. As a bonus in there, the word class comes from a homophone to its plural-- the Latin classis-- which, along with the education definition, was a word related to sub-groups of people within ancient Rome.

Aziraphale said he learned "French" from Monsieur Rossignol "the hard way", which is both dirty and sweet, as, yeah, iit's a pretty basic erection joke, but also that hard is etymologically derived from and connected to both heard/to hear and heart. Hard/hear/heart in a sentence using Rossignol/nightingales and the two of them feels like it's referring to their spicy and romantic secret language💗 by way of referring to that time there was some linguistic melanging and Aziraphale really did have to take lessons in actual French-the-language, even as he was also spending some classy evenings frenching his rossignol. Long before frenching also became slang related to open-mouthed kissing, to french was euphemistic for oral sex. Devoted Francophile, the angel is.

re: the wine findings--

One thing I realized in thinking things through to respond to you is that I think we've both been spelling the name of the wine incorrectly. I blew up the gif of Crowley that I put in the top of the post and I think it's actually spelled Chenevel. The good news is that I don't think it actually changes your ideas about the words a lot and might just add a few things to them.

I love how you mentioned that chene (I can't do the accent mark on my Tumblr, either, but I know the word you're talking about) is oak in French. I can add a couple of things to that for you that you might find interesting. I also found oaks in 1941 and have had just this question mark next to it until you mentioned them in your message. That caused me to look at it a bit more and I remembered something interesting about the history of the word that I then confirmed & will put here. First, where the oaks come up in 1941, in case you're interested in that, too. It's in this bit:

When Aziraphale does the coin trick in the bookshop for Crowley, he presents both coins that are part of the trick-- a sixpence and a farthing. This scene is really meta-- Crowley's even making meta roleplaying jokes while roleplaying an audience-- and I had the feeling that some ties to nightingales were happening quite a bit in it so I was looking at the words pretty carefully. I had a hunch that looking at what is on those coins might prove interesting. I'm American and I don't really know a ton about British coin history (I'd wager there are plenty of British people who don't either lol) so I looked up what was on the farthing and the sixpence. The farthing made me smile a bit because it's a wren--the nightingale-wren-- but the sixpence was stumping me a bit for awhile because it was an oak.

I have been all around the block looking at symbolism of oaks and I had really nothing that was super-direct to Good Omens. Even the Biblical ties felt kinda meh. Everything was kind of "yeah, I guess, if you stretch it, that works" but the symbolism in this story is sharper than that so I got to a point where I was even wondering if this is something that is more set up for the future and would be better understood after S3. Then, I remembered the word history thing I'll share as I think it makes the oaks make more sense.

The word oak in Indo-European languages comes from the root base which evolved into the word tree. Basically, in these languages, etymologically, an oak is part of the root word for every kind of tree because it's part of the root word for the word tree itself. In this way, it's very similar to the word apple. A long time ago, people used the word apple kind of in the way that we use the word fruit today and the roots of types of apples and apple itself also contained the Greek word mela, which is also the basis of the word melon. Fruits were described in relation to apples-- so, dates were originally called fingeraeppla, literally: "finger apples", and so on. As a result, the names of a ton of different fruits are etymologically tied to the apple and the same is a bit true of how the word tree ties to the oak.

I did a post awhile back about the word costermonger, which is the old-timey name for a vendor in a street market, and how coster was a kind of apple so the word literally translates to "apple seller", even though, by definition, it refers to a seller of any kind of food in a marketplace. With etymology-based symbolism and the marketplace in S2? This makes all food in Good Omens, effectively, symbolic apples. So, we can apply the idea of the Serpent and the apple to literally everything that can be drunk or eaten in Good Omens and that would include this wine... but what does this have to do with oaks and trees?

It hit me the other day that, if oak = all trees, then the wordplay there has to do with the fact that to fell is the verb used to mean to cut down a tree. To "cut Down (Hell)" is a big part of why Aziraphale is Mr. Fell-- it's that he's Crowley's and de facto married to one of The Fallen and their relationship is felling Hell-- cutting down on its impact. So, the wine being the oak? The chene part of it being the tree? 🌳...

You mentioned that val in Dutch is a bad fall and this is where it both does and doesn't matter that we both spelled this wine incorrectly when we were first looking it up because if the rest is spelled -vel, as seems to be the case? Val and vel are apparently related in Dutch. The Dutch vel is not to fall but part of the origin of the word fell, in as in tree-related definition. Chenevel would then be a kind of mash up of French words forming a version of the English definition of to fell a tree, with the chene part referring to the tree and the vel referring to felling it. Chenevel = Fell. 😲

It's either a massive coincidence or one of them influenced a vineyard to adopt their name back in the day or they own a French winery together or who knows what but I think it's a French version of their name. The bottle is labeled 1938 so whatever happened here with the wine happened prior to that. 🍷💘

So, what might it mean that Aziraphale refuses a glass of the Chenevel wine? I agree with what you said about it being about Crowley offering a connection to him and that it wasn't like Aziraphale didn't want one but that he felt like he was "working." I don't see it as him really working, though, so much as just telling himself he was. Where we differ, I think, is that I actually think that refusing the wine was a bad, if understandable, call on Aziraphale's part. I see connections between Aziraphale refusing the glass of wine and him taking the coffee in the two, different conversations at Marguerite's. There's also that coffee convo at Marguerite's is when the restaurant is closed-- a hint to it not being a genuine offer, imo-- while Crowley is offering Aziraphale wine while being there when it, like Crowley, was open.

We have some different ideas on what's happening in the plot in the end of S2, in that your message indicates you believe that Aziraphale is about to be the Supreme Archangel, while I believe that he was tempted by Satan to fall in 2.06 and is about to be a demon in 3.01. Either way, though, I think he should have had a glass of wine with Crowley and for reasons that I think are in the same spirit of what you're saying-- Aziraphale wants to make things better. I just don't think that a job in Heaven or letting Heaven's actions determine how he lives his life is how he does that.

Crowley isn't completely in the right in S2, either. He's not talking to Aziraphale enough, especially about his Book of Life fears, and he winds up having too much to drink in the Marguerite's scene and after it, but what I don't think he was wrong about was that what would have made them both feel better, especially Aziraphale, and done more to solve what was happening, was for Aziraphale to quit running around tying his every anxiety to one another and building up this party into the meltdown it became but to, instead, sit with Crowley for awhile for a little date at the pretty French place, have a little wine, and talk.

They could see the bookshop door from where they were sitting and Gabriel was fine inside. Aziraphale hadn't been eating or drinking much of anything all week and he and Crowley hadn't had much time alone for days. I think the healthier thing would have been to have a glass of wine and talk. Aziraphale does at least sit down and flirt for a moment or two but he won't have a glass and take some time with Crowley for long enough to really talk about how he was feeling, which I think was what Crowley was going for.

How would this have solved the stuff going on with Heaven?

I think it does because, fundamentally, the only way to change Heaven is to be the change, and that means living life the way they want to, on their own terms. Aziraphale doesn't need to be the Supreme Archangel to change anything-- I'm not sure he actually would ever have the power to in that job. Aziraphale and Crowley making their own life on Earth is how they've already changed things and will continue to do so.

The way to take out the system is to refuse to take part in it. If enough people do, the system will collapse itself. There won't be a war if enough people refuse to fight it. In that way, the way for Aziraphale to deal with Heaven isn't to stress about what they're doing but to just live life. It's very understandable where his anxiety comes from and his concern about the danger but there's nothing he can do to fix it individually except to live the way he wants to because that is actually the most powerful thing anyone can ever do.

It's like dealing with abusive family or a corrupt church. How do you deal with it? You don't go to it anymore. You don't give it your time or your money. To the best of your ability, you don't give it the headspace it doesn't deserve. Instead, you live the way you believe is right. You live the way you want the world to be and try to support others who are doing the same. You keep the door open for those who want to escape and might need help but you keep it closed for those who seek to further oppress. Aziraphale is already saving Heaven. He gave Gabriel sanctuary. He gave Muriel an escape. He's made a life with Crowley that shows others that there is more to life than misery and waiting for war.

Most days, Aziraphale knows this but it's not easy and he's exhausted and depressed and going through all the things in S2 so he goes down a bad path with it but yeah. That's why I think it would have been better had he just sat down and split some Chenevel with Crowley. He became so convinced that he was Managing Heaven Stuff but he was really just spiraling a bit and refusing to let Crowley or anyone else in and it snowballed into disaster.

Aziraphale needs-- just for starters-- a long hug, a great meal, a great fuck, and seventeen straight hours of serpent-cuddled sleep. He'll be a little balmy until those goals are achieved so, probably, until the South Downs Cottage 😂 but, whatever actually happened to him in 2.06, he and Crowley will get back to smitten silliness soon, of that we can be certain. 😊

Thanks for the word fun & feel free to message anytime.

[moonyinpisces]

re: your last post, i would really love to get this ask answered but i can understand if you don't (and i definitely do not expect this to be answered publicly), but is there a post that i can read in which you've explained your "love and sex are connected" stance? i ask because i'm so curious to read your thoughts about it, coming from someone who agrees with that thought, i'm just curious about the specifics of what do you mean when you say that (for example: does that mean that by definition asexual love is platonic and not romantic? is there space for asexuality or aromanticism in this idea? i think that love and sex are connected and that there still are people who are asexual and can have partnerships, so that's why i was curious about more details on that).

sorry for bothering you and thank you in advance if you answer my question 🩷

you're totally fine! i hope it's cool i answered it publicly, i think it's a topic that a lot of people shy away from. luckily, i have little to no self preservation. i'll just re-explain my stance here 👇

i think just inherently, if we call a piece of media a love story it implies sex. this is a fact no matter how deep you worm your way into internet culture and try to convince yourself otherwise. now that doesn't mean sex is going to happen, or even be mentioned--that has to do with the rating/presentation of the media, not the media itself (one time almost a year ago i mentioned this same topic and someone specifically cited the little mermaid as ace rep. and i was like in the sequel they... literally have a child? and then the person blocked me lol)

now can love be platonic? absolutely. can people have love for others and not want to fuck them? yeah, i would say a majority of love experienced globally is the platonic/familial sort lol. but a love story is only platonic if it's designated as platonic, meaning that at its root, the implication is sex. if i want to divorce sex from the romance, i have to explicitly define it as such. meaning if we call, for example, good omens a love story, that implies sex and sexual attraction unless the canon ever explicitly tells us differently. a love story includes sex unless it can prove it doesn't, that's just... the nature of being a human being living in a human society lol

and i think that's a scary concept to people who have labeled themselves as sex-repulsed without digging into WHY they feel that way in the first place. but i think further than that people are too bogged down in connecting their identities with fiction to the point that the work becomes divorced from fiction, so you have huge swathes of people claiming characters as whatever they want external to the canon in order to feel secure in their own identity. fascinating subject, too dense to get into in a tumblr ask haha

i think at the crux of it what i need people to understand is characters are not real people, they do not have aspects deeper than what we're shown in the canon. characters are simply functions of the plot. like take two characters in a love story. sure, if these WERE real people, TECHNICALLY someone could say "they can have sex and actively want to have sex and be attracted to each other and still be asexual!" which. uh, sure, but if a mouse said that about a kia sorento, etc etc. like that potential reading has so little bearing on the story that i know it's just pulled out of someone's ass so they can manufacture deeper meaning and "representation" out of the media they consume because they're not getting that representation elsewhere. which sucks! but! just because something COULD be canon doesn't mean it IS canon and in our current climate of media illiteracy, that's the unfortunate trend to how people are choosing to consume media. self-first rather than story-first, internal vs external, individual vs collective. you can go on and on.

and of course. of course. you can negate ALL of this by just telling me it's not that serious and media is consumed in the preferred method of the consumer, that's what it's meant for. i am fully self-aware i come at this like i have two english degrees. and for that fact, rest assured i will always be deeply deeply uncool

[mytwotragicgaymen]

Magic reveal playlist

Ok bois strap in this might be a long one. First off this post is inspired by this work on ao3 by @heyitskai2 (thank you so much for this btw). I don't know about yall but I sometimes like to make playlists of scenarios (where are my maladaptive daydreamers at) and this time I decided to make a somewhat specific one: Merlin's magic reveal to Arthur, specifically the one described in the work I mentioned just now.

For those of you who are too lazy to check it out (which you definitely should it's really good and quite short) the gist is that instead of Arthur catching Gwen cheating on him with Lancelot, its Arthur discovering that Merlin has magic (with the implication of an already existing romantic relationship or feelings), which is followed up by Merlin's banishment from Camelot.

Now, few things to get out of the way before we begin:

The lyrics might not match completely in some of the songs. That's fine, we are working with a very specific scenario after all.

The playlist is short, just 8 songs and all have reoccurring artists. We're going based on vibes, not variety.

Speaking of variety, the genre of this playlist is a clusterfuck of whatever I want it to be.

This playlist is more from Arthurs perspective though some songs can be applicable to Merlin.

Link to Spotify playlist is here.

That being said let's move on to the playlist:

Decode by Paramore - this is the song that @heyitskai2 talks about in their work. The big, booming reveal that is angry, emotional, and full of angst. Arthur is upset. Merlin is upset. No one is happy. Everyone is angry and sad and miserable.

Black Out Days by Phantogram - Arthur, in a flash of fury, decides to banish Merlin from Camelot. Consumed by rage he cannot think of anything else other than Merlin and at the same time, he tries to fight away any and all thoughts of Merlin.

The Day You Died by Phantogram - Arthur fights with the conflicting feelings of banishing Merlin. Kind of in a limbo of emotional turmoil, flip-flopping from feeling anger and resentment, and also trying to convince himself that he is "fine" and that Merlin is "just a traitor".

All I Wanted by Paramore: kind of applicable to both Arthur and Merlin. As they dwell on about their choices and ways they could've avoided this happening. Truly letting their feelings settle in, and understanding what is going on aside from just anger.

The Night We Met by Lord Huron - the big sad settles in. Both start missing each other and reminiscing about their life before everything collapsed. Realizing just how much they love and need each other.

Abstract (Psychopomp) by Hozier - This is basically Arthur coming to terms with the fact that even though Merlin lied to him, he understands why, and how he is also at fault (what with the magic being illegal in Camelot). Despite Merlin breaking Arthurs trust, he finds that he can't not love Merlin. And truly, even after this, Arthur still finds that he trusts Merlin wholeheartedly.

Meet Me in the Woods by Lord Huron - the more Arthur thinks about magic, the more he understands, not only Merlin, but also all the magic users. Realizing the error of his fathers ways. This incident has changed him forever and he now works on changing things in Camelot for the better. He misses Merlin horribly, but is uncertain of how Merlin feels towards him. Perhaps he is angry and disappointed in Arthur? Arthur decides to send Merlin a letter announcing that his banishment has been revoked and that he is welcome back to Camelot, if he wishes to return.

I, Carrion (Icarian) by Hozier - It's been a while, and there is no answer from Merlin. Arthur is overcome by bittersweet emotions. On one hand, he's happy for him. Thinking about how Merlin is probably in a better, safer place. On the other hand, he can't help but wish to be Merlin's safe place. And so, he tries to do for the people of Camelot what he could not do for Merlin: making Camelot a better and safer place by legalizing magic. And on a nice, sunny day, while Arthur is out, riding his horse in the woods, in the distance, he sees a figure approaching. Merlin.

[technicallyverycowboy]

Top 5 BL scenes/moments? 👀💕

OKAY as soon as i sat down to think about this my brain immediately went "we have never watched one single show in our life" so it took me a couple days to mull it over. in no particular order (behind a cut because i got wordy and needed to include illustrative screencaps)

moonlight chicken - uncle jim pulling out that ear bite move on wen

for my money i think moonlight chicken is gmmtv at its best, in no small part because it's about two grown adults and has a much tighter 8 episode run. (my only real qualm is believing that earth, whomst was 29, was meant to be almost 40. drop the skincare routine, loong jim, the people need to know.)

so much of the show is about longing -- for people and places and times that are gone -- and this scene cashes in so well on the seven previous episodes of growing tension and comfort between jim and wen. you can't always get what you want but, like, sometimes you do and it's fuckin' great.

2. bed friends - king fully laying on top of uea after banging

obviously the cat sex scene was a close, close second to this, because i very much do often think about king's rapturous expression when he tells uea that he really does look like a cat. chase your bliss, king.

but something about the intimacy of this moment burned itself into my brain. it's partially the implication that uea was getting fucked from behind (which pretty much never happens in bls) and partially the bone deep satisfaction they're both radiating. most fade to black sex scenes don't really convince me the characters did fuck in the pause, but this one 100% did.

3. playboyy - nont putting prom in his place

OKAY truly i could have put the vast majority of the six aired episodes of the show so far and it would have been true. soong and first in the pool throwing cash around. zouey and teena's painting thing. phob and nuth's wildly romantic in an "i'm in danger" way sex scenes.

but i came back to this one because it was the moment when i felt like the show clicked a piece solidly into place. nont isn't nant and he's done pretending that he is. prom does not get to act like he knows nont and he does not get to tell nont what to do. this little exchange did so much to get me really interested in both these characters. prom's face journey from annoyed to so hard he might pass out is fuckin' divine.

4. only friends - top and boston

only friends made many, many mistakes and i won't relitigate them here. still, when episode 3 came out, my expectations were solid and there was a lot of promise in what we'd seen so far.

everything about this sex scene is fucking perfect. the fucked up relationship between boston and top. nick listening. the three second shot of boston blowing top. force and neo put their whole pussies into this and delivered.

5. i told sunset about you - a tie between teh and oh-aew's first time really touching each other and oh-aew trying on the red bra after teh shoots him down

this entire sequence -- after they've sat downstairs inching closer together on the couch -- is one of the most erotic things i've ever seen in any media. and literally nothing happens but them sitting together while teh runs his hands all over oh-aew.

there's so little dialogue here; the incredible longing they're both feeling is 100% told through their expressions and the way they touch each other. the first time i watched it, i probably replayed this scene four or five times. nothing has ever captured what it's like to really, really want someone for the first time, when it's the most consuming feeling you've ever had.

a gifset of this scene is actually what made me decide to sit down and watch itsay in the first place. pp krit is great in all of the show, but this moment of a particularly queer expression of heartbreak is devastating every single time i watch it.

"if i was x, someone would love me," is such a common refrain when you're queer. watching oh-aew go through that imagining if he was a girl and teh could actually like him back in the daylight broke my fuckin' heart. (i also think it's a really lovely way to foreshadow oh-aew being told he's not manly enough for acting later on.)

[pinkcannibal]

Okay so this is my second comment on the new chapter but while you're answering asks I just wanted to say that I've been thinking? So much? About "You think of how lionesses are known to eat their cubs if they die, out of grief and hunger, and suddenly it all makes sense." Like... GOD. The POWER of that image and all the implications of how their all-consuming love (emphasis on the consuming part) has become the thing tethering them to earth. And the fact that really, you've been writing Marilyn as a kind of lioness this whole time, maternal and fierce and protective and ravenous and... ;O;

Every update just floors me in a new way and I just wanted to salute you for that sdlfkjhjsdhfsdf

~ @proton-selfships (we were mutuals on my old blog so I don't know if you wanted to follow again but .///. I'd love to talk to you more about your Marilyn/Laurel thoughts and headcanons!)

omg hi!!! ill definitely refollow again omg <33

but thank you for such kind words!! that means sooo much to me you liked that line :') its special to me in the way that reader is truly realising the depths of marilyns love here and the blurring of the maternal/romantic attachment they have to each other. i find it so fun and fascinating to explore bc they find so much comfort in it, and marilyns love IS truly like a lionesses to their cub. something really fierce and terrifying. and if reader died, the grief would be so deep and powerful marilyn would consume reader in the only way thats left. romantic love like to me is such a joy to write

[miens-reading-nook]

The Blighted Stars by Megan E. O'Keefe

Pages: 544 Published: 23 May 2023 My Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Wow, straight to my top 5 of 2023. Five stars 🌟 Okay, so, think Altered Carbon (your brain is mapped and your consciousness can be transferred to new copies of your body or other bodies, making you virtually immortal) but make it less gory (still pretty bloody, though), a bit spookier (scary fungus destroying everything everywhere) and add a little ✨spice✨ (casual queerness) and you've got The Blighted Stars. I don't even know where to start. I read this last night and I'm still vibrating with excitement. It's books like this one that remind me why I love sci-fi so much. First, I'll say that the casual way queerness was introduced in the story melted my heart. Sometimes people are just queer and that's it. I loved that. Second, sometimes you love a story because of its characters, sometimes it's the world building, other times the plot. With this book, well, its everything. Tarquin and Naia - the main characters - are great. As soon as I started reading I just wanted to know more about them. The world-building is great too and relatively easy to follow: - In a distant future, 5 corporate families rule over a world where resources are scarce and people are starving if they're not under contract with one of the families. Humanity is spread out over multiple dying planets and space stations, and the race for new habitable planets is on as a deadly fungus consumes every bit of plant life it touches. - Tarquin is the second heir to one of the families and Naia is his father's ex-bodyguard turned environmental terrorist. After their ship crashes on a dead planet that should’ve been thriving, they’ve got to figure out: 1) how to survive, 2) what the hell is going on. I feel like I could talk about this universe for hours so I'm just going to copy paste some of the notes I took while reading: "Yaassss, we love good queer representation" "The misprints are so fucking creepy" "Okay, but the plot is so cool." "Oh this fungus is scaryyy. I like it" "I JUST REALIZED THIS IS NOT GONNA BE FIXED IN ONE BOOK OMGGGGG THIS BOOK IS GONNA MAKE ME LOSE MY MIND" - this was when I realized this was probably part of a series lol "Okay I dig how much of a romantic tarquin is." And then it's just a bunch of theories trying to guess the plot as I went along 😂 I love when a book gets me this excited. When the story lingers in my mind and I find myself thinking about it over and over again, wondering about the implications of certain details, about the rules of this universe and what that means for the story going forward. I don't even know what else to say, I just know that it was super fun (and stressful) to read this and I love Megan O'Keefe's brain ❤❤

[lovecomesin]

Dear, Ebony

“My bounty is as boundless as the sea. My love as deep; the more I give to thee, the more I have, for both are infinite.” I love you Ebony. I love you for everything you are now and for everything you will be. I love the darkness and unlovable sides of you. I love and accept myself in all of my complexities as am a woman, and a lover, and a human. I won’t deny my basic need for love, beauty and happiness. Lately I have been consumed with so much love and happiness it fills me up. My main focus is allowing myself to live in the moment and love in the moment. Accepting all that I have for every beautiful and special aspect that it is instead of dwelling on the things that I would like to have. 6 months from now I will turning 30. This will be one of the biggest and newest milestones for me. I want to make a habit to start being more selfish. On one hand I dislike the term selfish because it has a negative implication to it where you assume to give attention to yourself you are minimizing the attention you give others and its simply not true. When I say I want to be selfish I want to be more devoted to myself as a person who is in need of myself. Too often I give so much of myself to people who use, exhaust or don’t deserve the totality of the experiences I naturally offer. I cannot and I will not change my hopeless romantic nature. For me, love always win. Love is the greatest and most beautiful gift a human can ever offer to another. I implore myself to continue to walk a path of love, light and happiness. I implore myself to give myself the love I wish to receive from others. It is my responsibility to take care of myself. Just as it is my responsibility to advocate for myself first and foremost. Essentially, I am the only person who can allow others to treat me the way I would like to be treated. It odd to imagine how the entire trajectory of my life has changed so much over these past few months. When I first bought my house I was struggling to navigate into my adulthood. I was holding onto friendships and relationships that no longer served me. I was entering a completely new and foreign stage in my personal life and I was scared and needing the familiarity of those I love to guide me through it all. I know now that I was wrong about needing to hold onto who I used to be. And when I say it was wrong I don’t mean wrong in a negative manner. I simply mean it was wrong in a way that it wouldn’t allow me the opportunity to grow and it would keep me exactly where I have always been. I’ve been so focused on figuring out the kind of life I want and ensuring I do everything in my power to achieve it. I had been so focused on finding love and making other people happy while singlehandedly ignoring my own wants needs and boundaries. No more! I want to use the last few months of my twenties to be as selfish as I desire. I want to be able to revel in the fact that I moved exactly as I pleased because it is my desire to do so. I have always lived a good life but it can be much better. I have to take responsibility for my portion of it all. I realized a few years back that I didn’t love myself as much as I thought I did. I was simply stating that if loved myself without actively showcasing actions and making choices that did not prove my love for myself. The truth is I love others more than I loved myself. I was dependent on friends and pseudo relationships. That attachment to those friends and men I needed to let go set me on a course where I couldn’t possibly fully love myself because I was much to consumed in overextending myself to everyone else. No more! I love you Ebony. I have always loved you. I loved you even when you used to dislike the things you cannot change about yourself like your voice, your body and your mind. I want to be able to give myself a love so all-consuming and so romantic that it manifest into my life so that I can receive it from other people as well. Now I am aware that self-love is not a substitute for a intimate relationship with another person but it all must start with me.

With the grace of God I pulled myself out of my dark spaces. When I moved into my first home I felt alone and abandoned by the people I loved most. I didn’t expect that betrayal and it really made it difficult for me to navigate being a homeowner in a new city with essentially no support from my best friends. I didn’t mention my home or even show anyone what it looked like because I felt so guilty about my blessings. I’m making it my main priority to live a life that I am happy with. To live a life full of love and reassurance. To live a live surrounded by people I know have my best interest. I find solace in my ability to love deeply even when the person I love isn’t loving me in a way that I can recognize or appreciate but I am done with that. This is the last of my twenties and it is time to put childish things away. I love you Ebony and it is precisely because I love you that I want you to get everything you deserve. You have such a big heart and is full of so much love that it would be a disservice to yourself to accept anything less. With the grace of God and my own hard work I healed myself from every single trial and tribulation. I have healed heartbreaks, friendships and depression and I will continue to overcome more. I love you Ebony. You have always been so strong which is why I know you will succeed in all you desire. I trust you Ebony. You are deserving of an epic love. You are deserving on happiness. You are deserving of peace. You are deserving of reassurance. You are deserving! It’s okay to not always be okay and it’s even okay to be uncertain. I am my safe space. I am the master of my abilities. I can’t shrink myself to be digestible for anyone because that would be a violation of myself. No more violating yourself for others! You are worthy of all the things you want and need in this life Ebony. God has taken you out of so many situations and places you directly into your biggest blessings. I love you Ebony always and forever. I trust in my ability to step into this newest chapter with my head held high and with good spirit because there is so much for happiness and beauty to come. I am not afraid to make mistakes because those very mistakes are what allow me to continue to grow and be the very best version of myself. I release myself from all the pain, all the betrayal, the drama, the confusion, the broken hearts, the guilt, the loneliness, the depression, and the absence of love. I welcome everything that God has for me. I welcome the freshness of new beginnings. I welcome new love and friendships. I welcome a deeper connection to my faith and God. I welcome a happy life. I welcome a peaceful life. I welcome joy in abundance. I welcome my ability to trust in myself as well as those who love me. I welcome myself and this journey I’m on. Writing to myself in a way is so lovely because it gives me the opportunity to release all that I am, think and feel in my rawest form and covert into the manual to elevate myself. This is my journey. And in Ebony’s journey there is ups and downs, love and betrayal and lain but it is still my beautifully unique journey. A journey that is specific to me by me. A journey where there is no wrong turns only adventures. I love toy Ebony and I want you to continue to be the lover that you are. I want you to find a love that is soo perfect you’ll immediately be able to recognize it. I love you now, back then, in the future, always and forever. This is my love letter to you. To remind you how much I love you and how much you mean to me. To lift you up when you feel down. To make you smile in your moments of sorrow. To romanticize your life just as it is because it is deeply romantic. I love Ebony and I can’t wait to read about all your future adventures of love to come. Until then, laters baby.

[licncourt]

Why does Lestat only get involved sexually and romantically with other people? Is it a way to seek validation and love?

How do you all always know exactly what I've been thinking because this is a really under-discussed part of Lestat’s character that I've been meaning to talk about. I absolutely think it's what you said and when you look at his history, it makes a lot of sense.

We know Lestat experienced childhood neglect and abuse, with the implication that he was quite isolated otherwise. The first meaningful relationship he recounts experiencing is with Nicolas. This also seems to be his first real romantic/sexual relationship, occurring at a formative age when a lot of the identity is beginning to solidify.

Throughout the series, Lestat meets a lot of people and they react to him in a wide variety of ways, but his looks and charm are the only consistent way in which he attains the attention he desperately wants and needs. I don't think I need to expand on that bit of Lestat’s characterization, I'm pretty sure we can all agree he's extremely motivated by attention and validation. It doesn't help that he's consistently desired for his looks and charisma and then rejected on any level deeper than that.

I would argue that, in addition to the childhood groundwork, his assault by Magnus exacerbated the issue in its own way. This "rape" was based extremely heavily on Lestat's looks, something Magnus makes him very aware of, and then they form a sort of trauma bond through the turning where Lestat experiences what he describes as an almost romantic and sexual attachment to his attacker. He actually repeats this trauma bond with Akasha under almost identical circumstances.

Regardless, this trauma with Magnus and the subsequent rejections that follow (Nicki and Gabrielle) really kick Lestat's need for romantic and sexual attention into high gear. The way he falls for Louis essentially at first sight and commits himself entirely within days really drives that point home. When he feels Louis slipping, he takes drastic measures to either hold tight to that connection, find a new one, or both (Antoine).

I'm actually going to acknowledge later canon now because one of the only Lestat-isms that makes sense is his sudden serial monogamy. In a world where he doesn't remain in a committed relationship with Louis (something that might soothe those urges to seek and seek and seek love) I can absolutely see Lestat behaving the way he does in the later books.

Maybe in this scenario, the sudden intimacy with Louis is too scary and overwhelming so he backs away, but then that love void returns. What's interesting about the way Lestat approaches his romances for this period in canon is that, bar his human body...adventures...none of them feel like flings in his approach.

He seems to genuinely think he loves (or wants to love) people like David and Rowan and Gretchen and Dora. These relationships, however brief and ultimately surface-level, are all-consuming for their duration. He needs them, and for him that becomes indistinguishable from love. Or at least he lets himself believe it is.

Lestat is lucky that he's attractive and charming because it makes it easy for him to acquire partner after partner. He can satisfy his desire for love and attention without the terrifying vulnerability and intimacy that comes with a long-term, committed relationship that might actually meet his needs in a healthy way. Instead, it's one fix to the next like an addict.

The only thing he has that consistently gets him "safe" love is his appearance and superficial personality, so it's not a leap to say that these traits become something he leans too heavily on, flaunts and plays up to an off-putting degree in his attempts to be wanted. That creates its own issue, his perceived vanity and narcissism making the relationships he can form all the more brief and shallow, tanking his self-esteem further and creating a vicious cycle as he tries to compensate more.

All the terrible characterization notwithstanding and with my fantasy of "Loustat definitely worked things out in-depth behind the scenes between PL and RoA" intact, I think his happy relationship with Louis and the sudden drop-off of those serial relationships tracks.

The fact that he was so devoted to Nicki and then spent 70 years trying to keep his marriage to Louis intact by any means necessary indicates to me that he does want that kind of commitment and longevity from a relationship, he just didn't know how to achieve it before. It's not that Lestat is magically able to be happy with one person overnight and stopped wanting to sleep around, but that his intimacy issues have been resolved to the point where his need for love can finally be met by one person. I sure wish we'd seen that happen, but I'm very glad that he eventually got there.

[mikauzoran]

The Shipping Continues

I’m still reading through the Vanitas no Carte manga to practice my Japanese, and I have some more favourite moments from Volume Four to share. ^w^

First off, Noe completely losing it when Dr. Moreau tries to touch Vanitas.

Dr. Moreau was just asking Vanitas if he could extract one of Vanitas’s eyes to study it, and Noe has had enough.

Vanitas says, “Hey. What are you doing? Stop it.” because Noe is going to blow their cover to which Noe replies, “I’m sorry, but that’s impossible. Dr. Moreau, I’ve got a mountain’s worth of things I want to say to you, but...calling people by a number like you’ve been doing with your ‘Number Six-Nine, Number Six-Nine’...cut it the hell out!!!”

I like that Noe just drops all pretense of politeness here and snaps. ^.^

A side note on Dr. Moreau: I really love the allusion to the 1896 book by H. G. Wells: The Island of Doctor Moreau. (Have people heard of it before? ^.^;) It’s about a mad scientist who’s made these hybrid human-animal creatures on this island that the narrator gets shipwrecked on. My favourite character is the pink sloth creature. It’s an interesting book, and I always love when contemporary fiction references classic fiction. The references make me happy. ^w^ It’s like finding Easter eggs.

This is another great scene. Vanitas was about ready to give up, but Noe inspired him to keep trying. Actually, what happened was Vanitas was going to have everyone leave and seal the room until the monster consumed itself and disappeared on its own because there was no way for them to get the cursed one out of the monster in order to purify them. Noe convinced Vanitas to jump into the monster’s void-like maw in order to perhaps save the cursed one from inside of the monster.

Only, they didn’t know that that was going to work. For all they knew, they were going to their deaths. Instead of letting Noe go in on his own (because Noe wasn’t giving up, and he was going whether Vanitas went or not), Vanitas decided to go with Noe, knowing that it could be a suicide mission. It’s kind of romantic in a twisted way that Vanitas picked possibly dying with Noe instead of letting Noe go alone and then sealing up the room to let the monster eat itself out of existence.

But what I really like about this scene is the dialogue!

Vanitas: That’s the cursed one who created “Predator”. (The kanji says “shadow figure”/“silhouette”/“shadow monk”, but the furigana reads “puredatouuru”.)

Noe: It’s okay. We can win.

Vanitas: Ha. “So long as we’re together”?

This is a callback to a scene in Volume 3:

Here, Vanitas has just asked if Noe can win against Roland (I’m guessing that’s how you spell his name. In katakana, it’s “rooran”. I’m guessing that’s the French name “Roland”). Noe says, “I don’t know...but we can win. So long as we’re together.”

A note on my translation: That’s not literally what Noe says, but that’s the vibe. In Japanese, it’s “oretachi nara”. Literally, that means “so long as it’s us”. The emphasis is on “tachi”. “Ore” would just mean “me”. “Tachi” makes it plural, so Noe is emphasizing that so long as it’s him and Vanitas, they can win. It feels more natural in English for me to translate that as “so long as we’re together”. 

I love the above scene of Vanitas and Noe laughing together after having pulled it off and narrowly escaped death. I also love Roland looking on in awe at a vampire and a human laughing together. 

You can tell he ships it. This is his “and then a shipper was born” moment.

Above is another great scene. Amelia comes in to give Vanitas a message, and Noe is still sleeping. He’s just fallen out of bed with a loud crash.

Amelia: Noe-san?!

Vanitas: Oh, so he’s fallen out of bed again?

Amelia: Uh... Is this...really okay?

Noe: *soft, breathy snore*

Vanitas: Hey. Don’t get close to him. He’ll turn you into a body pillow.

I love the implication that Vanitas knows this fact from personal experience. How else would he know that Noe latches onto and snuggles anything and anyone within reach when he’s asleep? Vanitas has definitely gotten snuggled before, and I want fan art. XD

Honorable Mentions from Volume Four:

This scene. I won’t translate it word for word, but Vanitas is getting worked up because Noe refuses to take one of the Chasseurs hostage. Vanitas says that if Noe doesn’t like Vanitas’s way of doing things, he can just go because Vanitas doesn’t want to be around people with Noe’s soft way of thinking. Vanitas is afraid that if he spends time with people like Noe, Vanitas will eventually go soft too, and then he’ll end up dead.

I really love the depth of Vanitas’s character. Sensei has done an excellent job with him in particular (though, all of the characters are wonderful). His psychology is fascinating. He’s obviously been through a great deal, and he’s adapted in order to survive. He’s scared of letting people in because being the way he is and being a loner is what’s kept him alive and safe up until this point.

I’m really looking forward to seeing how Noe slowly chips away at the walls Vanitas has built around himself. ^w^

This is my other honorable mention. After Noe and Vanitas escape from the catacombs, Vanitas collapses next to Noe and slumps against Noe’s back. It’s really precious.

He closes his eyes and sighs, “I’m tired”. I love the trust and vulnerability here. Vanitas obviously feels safe enough around Noe to let his guard down. ^.^

My Love Letter to Yen Press:

Once again, if you’re interested in reading Vanitas no Carte, you can get it in English from Yen Press. I really love this publisher because they do an excellent job of staying true to the original text. When I was in high school and couldn’t read manga raw yet (either because I couldn’t get my hands on it or my reading level wasn’t sufficient for what I wanted to read), Yen Press was my favourite because I felt like I could trust them to translate the manga how I would myself.

When I was little, you couldn’t trust the people who were dubbing anime into English. They did ridiculous things to sanitize anime for kids’ consumption like editing out all of the cigarettes and guns. They changed dialogue so that characters who had been hinted at being queer in the original were no longer queer in the English dub. They did silly things to localize the anime like changing onigiri into donuts and whitewashing the characters. That was my main motivation for teaching myself Japanese. I wanted to be able to tell for myself what was actually being said and going on. Yen Press was one of the companies I could trust to be faithful to the original in their translations until I was able to read the original on my own, so I’m sure they’ve done a fabulous job with Vanitas no Carte, if you’re interested in checking it out. ^.^

Okay. That’s it for me for now. Do you guys like me talking about my favourite scenes? ^.^; I know my Ladybug followers are probably like, “What is she on about?” XD Thank you for indulging me.

[imposterogers]

i’m not even in the stevebucky fandom and i don’t have any strong feelings about them whatsoever and i still fully believe that steve/bucky could have been the best love story in the entire mcu. like honestly just the content that we have for them already is more romantic than pretty much all the canon mcu couples. it makes complete logical sense for them to be together??? and people say this about mlm/wlw ships all the time but it really is so true for them that like... if one of them was a woman they would undoubtedly be together in canon... sorry i know you know all of this but scrolling through your blog is really getting me annoyed that stevebucky didn’t happen....... like....................

the thing that gets me about stevebucky is that their relationship was literally framed in a romantic context. like, I legitimately think it’s impossible for the writers to not notice what they were doing. i’m not trying to minimize the importance of platonic male love in the media we consume, but it doesn’t change the fact that the characters were placed into traditionally romantic tropes, and made borderline flirtatious comments to each other. 

I mean, let’s start from the beginning 

-steve (the damsel) is being beaten up in a back alley behind a movie theater, where bucky (the dashing knight)  knew exactly where he was because they were supposed to meet to watch a film together 

-they then go on a “double” date, where bucky pays more attention to steve’s reactions than the girl’s. when steve slips away and tries to enlist, he follows, and says “They’ll catch you. Or worse, they’ll actually take you.” he wants his “sweetheart” safe on the homefront while he’s away at war

-when steve hears about the 107th being captured, their roles immediately switch. steve becomes the “knight” bucky becomes the “damsel”. steve risks his role as captain america and his life just at a chance bucky might be alive. when steve is trapped in the burning hydra base, bucky yells “no! not without you!”. it is made explicitly clear that they both would rather die than leave the other behind

-at a bar, over drinks, bucky says to steve “you’re keeping the outfit, right?” which is a direct implication that he thinks steve looks good in it 

-when peggy enters the bar, bucky is visibly jealous. while, because its two men, the audience is left to assume steve has the affection of the hot chick, if we look beyond that, bucky could also be seen as being jealous/hurt that other people are beginning to see steve as a romantic interest and Incredible Human Being, when for years, bucky had steve all to himself 

-when bucky falls from the train, steve goes back to that same bar where he asked bucky to join him (stay in war for him, not go back home without him). peggy says to allow steve to allow bucky the dignity of his choice (to stand by steve, to die by steve) and that’s when steve decides to avenge his death. he says, “I’m goin’ after Schmidt. I’m not gonna stop till all of Hydra is dead or captured.” he very literally becomes the first avenger (hence the title of the movie) for bucky. 

let’s fast forward a bit 

-ITS BEEN A LONG LONG TIME (still not over that)

-when the winter soldier’s mask fell off, steve stopped in his tracks and allowed himself to be captured by hydra because of the shock (even when I had nothing, I had bucky), and bucky broke through 70 years of brainwashing from the sound of steve’s voice (the man on the bridge, I knew him). true love conquers all babyyyy

-til the end of the line = til death do us part

-sam tells steve that the winter soldier might not be the type that you save, but the type that you stop, but it is very clear that steve is not capable of making the choice to stop him 

-on the helicarrier, steve lets himself be beaten bloody by bucky. bucky chooses a “stranger” over everything he’s been programmed to know, then proceeds to keep a journal with a big picture of steve in it 

-civil war happens (I hate civil war so i’m not getting into it) but essentially its reiterated that over everyone and everything, steve and bucky choose each other 

-in infinity war, when everyone was dusting away, bucky calls out steve’s name so that steve would turn and look at him, allowing him one more glimpse at his “love” before he died 

i’m just not sure how anyone could provide this kind of content (including the fact that they lived together, went to art classes together, etc) and be surprised people shipped it. the issue with stevebucky, is it goes beyond a simple “shippers being shippers” sort of situation. they’re written with so much undying love, so much devotion and jealousy and intrinsic detail, its actually a shame they weren’t a canon couple, because even without it being canon, they’re the best written and strongest written romantic couple marvel has (to date) put onto the big screen 

[masterhandss]

Personally I don't see what you see in Geordo. He seems like such a scumbag to me and is the least likable charater in the whole series. He is always trying to get her alone to push her into things of a sexual/ more romantic nature without taking how she really feels into consideration. Like he "really wants her" and thats enough for him without caring what she really wants. Honestly he is the borderline non-con villian in my mind.

I mean, it's okay if you feel like that. To each their own.

Hmmm when I think about Geordo being sexually aggressive towards Katarina, I only really just think of the anime. The manga is a much more moe-fied and toned down version of the novels, and the novels does an okay job at balancing his desires for Katarina in all aspects. I'm not saying he doesn't have that trait in the other two mediums, I just think that they aren't as intense as the anime, so as someone who consumes all three versions I just tilt my head and go "huh." Of course I'm sure there are people who read the manga and novels that still feel uncomfortable about his behavior and that's valid too.

-> light novel spoilers ahead <-

tldr, there is a lot more going on to him than just someone who offers sweet words and questionable invitations to Katarina's ears, this may not be noticeable or acceptable to some people but we get to know more about how he thinks whenever the novels puts us in his point of view. You're free to dislike him as much as you want, but I like him & don't see him as a scumbag; and here's why:

I at least find it okay that Geordo is very serious about his pursuits for her because he is aware that she is dense and will not get it until you spell it in the sky. Everyone is just walking eggshells around Katarina hoping that the girl would just develop feelings for one of them to win the harem olympics. He knows that being dealt with a good card isn't enough, so he's actively taking action in order to win her heart. I mean I don't always agree with his methods either, like the "fait accompli" line or constantly inviting her to his room alone, but really, how much of that is something he really means to do vs how much of that is his excessive flirting + our minds assuming that he really means to claim her in that way?

Lines like that are really popular with japanese fans because it makes Geordo look "sexy" and "forward", which they enjoy in their fictional stories. He knows that his position gives him an advantage so he'll try to play his cards right and use it to increase his chances in victory.

It actually reminds me of a scene from the Hamefura StoryMe game, (don't really know how canon it is but I remember the JP ver. was advertised by @/hamhura) where Geordo indirectly asked Katarina how to woo a girl he really likes, and Katarina thinking he was referring to Maria, gives all the things he usually does in order to win her heart (visit her home, give her gift, dance with her in parties, be really forward about your feelings etc). I'm not saying Katarina approves of the ways Geordo attempts to win her heart, but there's some hilarity in knowing that Geordo already had and is constantly trying all the known ways to win over a girl in the world from a young age, and still has nothing to show for it. Like no awareness, much less any *feelings* lmao. So trying to make it obvious that he is interested in her romantically and sexually seems like the next logical step to him. I mean if you go by Geordo's logic and considering the time period this takes place in, he's pretty confident that he can get Katarina to love him back and they are engaged anyways so in his head he's in safe waters to attempt to make teases about such advancements if it gives him the smallest chance that Katarina would become at least aware of him through it.

Of course I know that stuff like that won't fly here in the real world, but maybe that's why I'm so lenient personally when it comes to his (debatably) sexual teases and advances, because it's a fictional story for a japanese audience. Doesn't mean I would approve any advances like that if it happens to me, it's just that it's hard to take his actions seriously when Katarina or the story doesn't take them seriously. Like, the girl would be pushed down to a bed by RufuSora and gives her a hickey and she still thinks the man is out for her blood.

He wouldn't even be entirely wrong, knowing the identities of the characters who Katarina knows has romantic interest in her in the novels, actions does speak louder than words when it comes to her. Like I said, whether or not Geordo really means what he says when the story teases the readers with sexual implications in his words and action depends on the reader in my opinion. They are there, I wont pretend they don't but I'd argue about the level of intent depending on what scene you're talking about.

The only scenes on the top of my head where he is very abrasive towards Katarina is the "fait accompli" scene, the Book scene form the anime (S1 EP8), saying he wants to lock her in his room (LN6) and the multiple times Geordo had invited her in his room at night alone (LN6 and LN8, i think).

I've already explained why I am okay with both Keith and Geordo's Book scenes from episode 8 of the first season because they are accurate representations of an exaggerated and unhinged versions of their desires towards Katarina so I won't bore you with those details again.

He mentioned in Volume 6 that he wants to lock Katarina in his room forever and keep her light to himself, which alarmed a few people when the book came out, but he said that in a moment where he feels super grateful and loving towards her because she knew how tired he was despite his fake face and without even saying anything. It was a moment where he felt so infatuated towards her that he wished the moment where he gets to rest in her arms would last forever, thus he made such a comment. I make it sound more dramatic than it was in Volume 6, it was just a quick comment honestly lmao.

For people who don't read the novels, that last part looks very sus and raises a few red flags I know, but to be fair we can't definitively say what his intentions are because Katarina never commits to those visits. Katarina has actually become wary of those invitations, because Keith and Mary have warned her that Geordo's intentions are sexual, but I'm not really trusting the word of the two people who are most distrustful and antagonistic to Geordo. They could be right, of course, but who can really say? We assume that they are correct because they care about Katarina and are wary of Geordo, but hamefura('s novels) is full of unreliable narrators anyways, it's not like Keith or Mary would consider the possibility of it being anything else because when it comes to the third prince they always fear the worst case scenario.

If you think about it, Geordo is probably aware that winning her over with a "fait accompli" won't work at all because it'll put him in a position that will make other people push him for the throne (which he doesn't want) or could ruin his reputation in high society if Katarina or her family react to it negatively. I'm not Geordo though, so I can't really say if he even have such fears and doubts in the first place, that's just my assessment based on the obstacles he has. On the outside he is really sure of himself and confident (which he arguably deserves) and on the inside he is very careful and insecure when it comes to Katarina.

Also like, spoilers but for someone who is very forward when it comes to his physical advances, Geordo is super weak when he is in the receiving end of those touches. He gets super embarrassed and easily flustered when its Katarina who is touching him, as if implying that to some extent that he's all just talk lmao.

I don't really agree that Geordo doesn't care about what Katarina feels at all, in fact his inner dilemma in the novels is that he doesn't know what to do because in every step he takes he might do something that could ruin his image in Katarina's eyes, be it pursuing or abandoning the throne or looking like a monster in front of her. He even halts his plans to make advances towards her during the Keith Kidnapping Arc, but threw it away because he knows how much finding Keith means to Katarina. He puts what Katarina want and doesn't want as his priority, so when what she feels is unclear that's when he acts on his own intuition. The only reason Geordo feels so confident to advance towards her sexually is because Katarina never rejected him before (because she doesn't know what they mean, and all of this is for the sake of simply making her aware in the first place)

I'm not trying to make anyone think that one has to read all the books in order to understand him, I think the manga does okay at conveying his feelings too. The anime really prioritizes on making him look "sexy" for the japanese female audience, so anything he does is sprinkled with spice whether we like it or not.

I'm sorry if it seems like I'm overanalyzing all his actions just to justify them, everyone has the right to be uncomfortable with his advances if it seems too much for you. It's just that his actions, while over the top and unnecessary, are done to please the type of audience that hamefura caters to, and it's hard to take him completely seriously when the story doesn't either in my opinion. Doesn't mean he's right or that any of it is okay, but it's his method of trying to put a dent on Katarina's bakashield. When you're in a race versus your friends who Katarina all loves equally, he's gonna use whatever card he can get in order to win.

I like Geordo; I like how much of his feelings for Katarina forces him to reexamine himself and realize that he isn't a perfect prince at all, that he has lots of problems and flaws that he needs to work out in order to be someone worthy of her. I like the way he falls more and more in love with her in every interaction they have because he finally gets to have a genuinely and caring interaction with someone. I like how Geordo wants to do better and be better for Katarina and the people around him, and he wants to be able to thank Katarina directly for that through being able to show his love. I like that despite how much of a chad he acts in front of her, he's a blushing mess at the thought of Katarina returning his feelings. I find it funny when his "sexual advances" fails and gets thwarted because he's trying them on the densest person and most protected lady to ever live. I like how Geordo is so head-over-heals in love with her and how much comfort and warmth she brings to him by simply being her caring and bubbly self.

I guess it's just a matter of different perspectives. If you find him unlikeable or a villain, then you do you. I try to explain why I personally excuse his actions, but I know it wont fly with everyone. We all see each character differently and absorb the material in different ways. In fact it's probably a bad idea for me to defend him with material that isn't the anime nor manga yet lmao. I mean I'm not that much of a fan of Mary anymore, and I'm kinda scared and wary of her, but I know people don't see her the way I do and I'm okay with that.

Maybe its just me, who is the kind of person who just goes with the flow and doesn't think too hard because it's all fiction anyways

It's hard to tell all this from simply watching the anime, so I laid all my feelings down in hopes that someone out there would understand why I like him so much.

Thank you for the ask, you can ask more questions or call me out if I said anything insensitive or wrong, I know a lot of this is me overanalyzing things which might look like I'm jus stretching. As someone who is aware of the things to come in Hamefura X, I can say that I am both excited and nervous as to how everyone will react for the direction of Geordo's character.

[mitthsyndic]

Here is my second attempt at writing Thrawn, much longer this time! Again if you have any criticisms or feedback then please feel free to share!

Read on AO3.

Summary: Lieutenant Thrawn meets the reader (gender neutral) at the Ascension Week celebrations on Coruscant, and she offers to show him around her art gallery. (Based roughly on the 2017 Thrawn book). 

Pairing: Thrawn x Reader (gender neutral, Thrawn is still a Lieutenant at this point).

Warnings: None.

Word Count: 1,715.

A Keen Eye

If you'd learned at least one thing from your meeting with Lieutenant Thrawn, it was that he was passionate about art. 

He wasn't simply an admirer or even a collector; he'd told you in detail about how he used an enemy's artwork in order to anticipate their tactics in battle, and ultimately defeat them. From what you could gather from his companions, this proved to be effective far more often than not. Your own companions scoffed dismissively at these claims, and not so politely ushered your group away from Thrawn towards more powerful, influential partygoers. 

However, you believed you could understand where Thrawn was coming from, and you felt compelled to see his analysis in action. After all, it wouldn’t exactly be an inconvenience to you, as he could simply meet you at your own art gallery here on Coruscant. Furthermore, it didn’t take a keen eye for art to notice Thrawn’s strikingly good looks; his dark blue skin and illuminating red eyes caused him to stand out among the other guests, and he was what drew you over here in the first place. If he didn’t appear to be interested in any romantic prospects, you figured you could at least have some fascinating discussions about the pieces in your gallery. 

"I had best follow my companions. However, Lieutenant Thrawn, I'd like to observe your analysis of artwork and the military conclusions you draw in person. Please, take my comm details and contact me to arrange a meeting at my gallery - that is, if you have any spare time." You smiled at him as you offered him your comlink.

His eyes flicked briefly between your face and the comlink, as though he was unsure how to proceed. You tried to read his face; it was unwavering and unreadable. Well, almost. You could have sworn you saw the corner of his mouth slightly upturn into a smile.

Taking your comlink and quickly inputting his details, he responded coolly, "That would be most pleasant. Allow me to check my schedule for my remaining days on Coruscant, and I shall respond with my availability." 

As he handed you back your comlink, your fingers brushed for a brief second. The fleeting contact was intoxicating, yet his expression remained unvarying. It was almost impossible to tell how he felt about the momentary brush of your hands, or if he could tell that your proposition was identical to that of a date. 

"Of course. It was delightful meeting the three of you, and I hope to see you again soon." Politely smiling at Ensign Vanto and Colonel Yularen, you reluctantly trailed after your friends, leaving you with the rest of the evening to reflect on your meeting with Lieutenant Thrawn.

**

It was late; with your thoughts consumed by your encounter with Thrawn, you had left the celebrations and gone to bed at your apartment on Coruscant. Awoken by the faint alert of your comlink, you drowsily sat up and picked it up, allowing the incoming transmission through. 

“Apologies if I woke you. This is Lieutenant Thrawn.” His smooth voice echoed out of the comlink. 

“No, not at all. And, please, there’s no need for titles when we’re alone.” You boldly suggested. From what you could gather, Thrawn was exceptionally good at reading body language and tone, so you tried to convey your desire for a more informal relationship, in case he hadn’t gathered the implications behind your invitation.

“Of course.” You were certain you could hear a smile behind his voice. “This may be of short notice, but I will only remain on Coruscant for another day. There is a lapse in my schedule tomorrow evening, and I leave the following morning. I would like to see the works in your gallery, and hopefully demonstrate my... abilities to you then.”

He was incredibly difficult to read -even more so when you couldn’t see him in person, but you were sure that you could detect a hint of flirtation in his tone.

“Tomorrow evening works for me. Allow me to send you its location. If you need any directions or your schedule suddenly changes, then feel free to contact me. I’ve got my comlink on me at all times.” 

“Thank you. I look forward to meeting you again soon.” Your comlink clicked off, and Thrawn was gone once again. 

You laid back down and allowed your mind to drift off to sleep, thoughts consumed by the mysterious Lieutenant Thrawn and your ‘date’ tomorrow. 

**

You’d spent all day debating on whether or not to close the gallery and give Thrawn a private tour, and, eventually, you decided against it. It was never busy at this time of night anyway, and you didn’t want to appear too forward if you had in fact misinterpreted his intentions, and he really was here to only demonstrate his analytical abilities. Then came the matter of your outfit; he’d provided a rough estimation of his time of arrival, so you couldn’t exactly run off and change into something more ‘date-worthy’ before he arrived, but if you dressed in your regular work clothes then Thrawn may believe that this meeting was strictly business. After much deliberation, you’d settled on an in between that appeared professional, yet a little flirtatious.

Once that was sorted, all you had to do was wait. Many admirers came and went, as did the occasional interested buyer, yet the minutes passed by slowly as you anxiously anticipated his arrival. Normally, you would consider yourself a fairly confident, collected individual, if somewhat an overthinker, but in comparison to Thrawn? You felt almost neurotic. 

Although he’d spent almost a full day now preoccupying your mind, all coherent thoughts dissipated out of your head once he finally stepped into your gallery. He was precisely on time, and wearing simple black garments that had presumably been issued to him by the Empire upon his admission into the academy. From what Colonel Yularen had said, Thrawn had been practically discovered by the Empire, as his home planet was not in a region familiar to you. He also hadn’t mentioned what species he was; at first guess he appeared to be Pantoran, yet his glowing red eyes suggested otherwise. You made a mental note to ask him at some point this evening. Furthermore, you realised he actually hadn’t told you his last name -or maybe he hadn’t told you his first name? As your lack of true knowledge about the man who stood in front of you became more and more apparent, it began to feel like an incredibly stupid idea to invite him here.

Though, it was too late to do anything about that now. I guess I’ll have to make sure I learn everything I didn’t think to ask, you thought as you approached him. His expression was indecipherable, as, you began to suspect, it always was.

“Welcome, Thrawn. May I call you that, or is that your surname? I didn’t think to ask yesterday.” You bit the bullet and chewed your way through the awkward question. 

“It is Mitth'raw'nuruodo. My native language is Cheunh, and Chiss is the name of my species.” He broke eye contact and looked around at the gallery, and you did the same. Currently, it was just the two of you in there. “May I ask how you came to acquire the gallery and its pieces?” 

Though, Thrawn didn’t appear to find it awkward at all. Your eyes locked, and that same small smile you identified the night before appeared on his face. “Yes, you may call me Thrawn. That is my core name, as Chiss names can be difficult for many species to pronounce.”

“Ah, I understand. May I hear it anyway? And, is Chiss the name of your language then?” You asked delicately, although Thrawn appeared unbothered by your questions. 

“Well, I’ve had a passion for art since I was very little, both painting and admiring it. I practiced as much as I could with every bit of free time I had, and I took any even remotely artistic jobs. If a neighbour wanted their walls painted, I’d do it for free and they’d let me keep any leftover paint afterwards. All of my money went towards buying canvases, sketchbooks, paint, brushes, even spray cans. Sometimes I’d even spray paint murals, though I think everyone else saw that as graffiti and vandalism rather than art.” You paused, and the two of you locked eyes again. He was listening intently, so you decided to continue on. “Anyway, as I got older I’d sell my paintings, but it didn’t provide enough money for me to live on, so I begged Zena, the old owner of the gallery, to give me a job here. I did small things at first, like sweeping floors and cleaning picture frames, but eventually I got to lead tours and meet with other artists. When she retired, she left the place to me, and here we are now.” 

Thrawn paused for a few moments, as though he was fully taking in and understanding your words. “How fascinating. Do you still paint now?” Thrawn began to walk slowly towards the closest painting on display.

“Yes, whenever I have any inspiration or time.” You followed close behind, intently watching his focused stare on the painting in front of him. 

He then turned back to you, and stopped just before the painting. “Is any on display? May I see it?” He questioned. 

“No, it’s all in the back in our studio. Plus, I’ve never fought any kind of battle in my life, so I doubt you’re going to be able to observe any military tactics from my paintings.” 

“Perhaps, perhaps not. Many do not realise exactly what their artwork can reveal about themselves or their culture as a whole. So, although you may have never fought before, I could look at your work and anticipate your possible movements and strategies if we were to engage in battle, whether that be in a ship or in hand to hand combat. I have demonstrated it in this particular way once previously with a friend.” 

He noticed the slightly apprehensive look on your face, and smiled. “Of course, we do not have to fight. That would not be very typical behaviour on a date, would it?”

[ranboo5]

whats 'the clip' and knifetrick?

Augh. Under the cut for shipping discourse and p/dophilia ment (nothing graphic or specific). Gets long bc I discuss my thoughts on DSMP shipping in general. You are setting me up fr anon

Some quick vocab -

intimacy here is used to refer to. Well. Any kind of intimacy between characters, of any sort, as an umbrella term /r, /p, and /qp here are used as shorteners to denote "romantic," "platonic," and "queerplatonic," both as adjectives And as verbs ("to /r" = "to portray romantically") shipping here is used to refer to any focused examination of intimacy between characters

And some clarity that Should follow from the essay next but may not - """anti-antis"""" and RPF writers delete forever

The Clip is from one of if not the? most recent Discord stage(s) Mr Live has done (which I missed when it was live RIP) wherein he issues a hard ban on shipping him ("do not ship me, in any way, with anyone!") which would less influence c!beeduo (which has been portrayed/stated to be romantic AND nonromantic both conflictingly for a while until being confirmed unconfirmed several months ago, that being the last was heard) without its direct invocation if he hadn't also cited for the reason as being underage ("'Cause, one, it's straight up pedophilia") which is! a) immediately applicable to At Least his DSMP character, Partially and b) while not Strictly True (should b obvious that portraying a relationship within the bounds of what it is in canon and in a nonsexual way is not That, and /r-ing c!beeduo etc was possible to do Appropriately again by remaining w/in the bounds of canon) is Clearly Indicative of the fact that baggage-wise it IS associated with people being fucking creeps

This Really complicates things bc like okay the apparent solution is "lol just don't /r it" but it's really like. A Worse issue than that bc like.

Okay the reason shipping in terms of fictional characters is a Different Bar is bc it's an examination of Intimacy and certain lines exist in certain dynamics of intimacy that Isn't Shown (which is the whole Within The Bounds Of Canon thing) which is important in a medium like DSMP because of the smaller gap + more personal relationship b/w character and streamer. Examining intimacy beyond th bounds of the consent that has been established in that regard is Weird at best and Violating And Creepy more often and, As Mentioned In Ranb's Stage, Literally Evil at worst

Which is why writing abt like. QPR or platonically intimate Techno and Philza (characters) is smth that is fine because that's smth that has been shown and repeatedly stated onscreen; it's in the bounds of canon n thus within th bounds of what the streamers've consented 2 be done with their characters. But writing T3chza making out or whatever is fucked up because it's smth that's beyond those consent barriers

And the thing is right

Slapping a /p on T3chza makeout doesn't. Make it less violating

Like what you CALL romantic is not the measure or whether it's past those barriers yk? And if it's indistinguishable, if it's in extrapolative territory that is Past The Bounds, it Does Not Matter how much you /p it EVEN IF IT IS TECHNICALLY PLATONIC y feel? Like at the end of the day placing a moratorium on some/all forms of shipping is placing a moratorium on certain examinings of intimacy

And okay 2 go back to Mr Live and his character. What it implies taken in context w/ older portrayals of c!beeduo and said by invoking smth that both evokes Really fucked up baggage (that does unfortunately exist btw I'm sorry if you didn't know that but People Really Do B Fucked Up Abt Beeduo) AND applies to his character is a revocation of consent to examining deep intimacies:tm: with his character, which is gonna apply regardless of the nature of that intimacy (even if nonromantic)

Like I don't /r c!beeduo myself, do not, never have, but I talk to people who have and have consumed content where they r background /r; I also don't think it matters. Like I don't Actively /r it and I don't Actively Not /r it because imho w/ the intimacy regarding c!beeduo that is plot relevant and character important whether that intimacy is /p /qp or /r doesn't really matter. I don't consider myself Less of a c!beeduo shipper than someone who /rs them because that would be dumb as hell and while none of the content I've made* is Intrinsically or Intentionally /r it certainly can be read tht way as much as it can be read /qp or /p. It's be dumb and hypocritical of me to like, dunk on ppl for /r-ing c!beeduo when I'm also invested in these two and my tonetags r not gonna suddenly Delete the picking apart I've done of the dynamic @ hand

Which Has Been. Within Bounds Of Canon. It's been what's been shown (sometimes to my great distress. There is a reason that the :canon_beeduo: emote looks the way it does) Directly Onscreen and in general keeping with the tone n intensity/directions of what they've Done With The Characters

HOWEVER

As mentioned up there. Revocation of consent

It makes. Full sense 2 me that Mr Live wants to place a moratorium or fullon ban on shipping his characters perhaps where he wouldn't have before because of the Unfortunately Very Extant trends of people being Fucking Weird about shipping his characters AND of using them as a Thinly Veiled Excuse to ship HIM, which. I should not have to explain why shipping real people is fucking abhorrent

THIS creates a problem which is a. Bit of a vacuum in interacting with what is a facet of c!Ranboo's arc, decision making, and character. Like you CAN have c!Ranboo w/o cbeeduo but you Can't Really have his plotline without examining c!beeduo. And as I mentioned earlier: even if your examination of c!beeduo is fully platonic, the significance of it To the plotline means that any examination of it and its relevance to the plotline and characters IS gonna be an examination of intimacy, which. Regardless of it's platonic, Is Still Shipping

Unless some HARD retconning happens it leaves this like. Hole in an aspect of c!Ranboo's arc and decisionmaking and it's very. Uncertain? God. Fucking months ago I was already kind of :huh. Does he know what the fuck he's doing: irt c!beeduo and desperately wishing for things to be cleared up and now it's only That Much Stronger

NOW. KNIFETRICK, FINALLY

Knifetrick (or, as it’s actually listed, Bishop’s Knife Trick) is a fic about "Ran and Jackie from The Pit TFTSMP" in a "canon-typical ambiguously romantic relationship." As you can tell from the scare quotes, especially if you've seen me vague, both of these are, to put it politely, Doubtful. I've read the fic; I will not be sharing my opinions because that would be neither productive nor responsible (I will just say I can't recommend it and leave it at that) but I WILL say the following that Is relevant to the conversation:

Ran's and Jackie's characterizations respectively have very little to do with characterizations from The Pit, and bear a dollar-store-version resemblance to tropes and personality motifs found in ESPECIALLY fanon c!beeduo, especially later in the fic. I would not go so far as to say they are Intentionally Literally Ranboo and Tubbo but they are transparent expies and were clearly written at LEAST unintentionally w/ c!beeduo in mind (esp since. Ran and Jackie barely interacted in The Pit), and for a readerbase that, as far as I can tell, is HUGELY dominated by /r c!beeduo shippers. Like. Sorry. This is off-brand c!beeduo.

The dynamic between the two is pretty unambiguously romantic, also; despite what the fic's white knights claim, romantic tropes and implications/motifs/imagery from at LEAST chapter two, and is very much explicitly romantic by the most recent chapter.

FROM CH1:

"And now, with raised eyebrows and a pursed lip, the newly named General Jackie observes Ran in such a way that makes the enderman’s skin crawl. Ran reminds himself that this kid, as short and harmless as he may look, is trained to kill. [...] Jackie narrows his eyes and tilts his head a little, as if he’s trying to read in between every one of Ran’s imperfect scales."

FROM CH2:

"It makes Ran’s skin itch with discomfort. [...] 'That actually doesn’t explain much of anything at all,' complains Jackie, and he pops a few croutons into his mouth with one hand. 'Tell me what you’re thinking, pretty-boy.'

"Ran feels his face flush, no doubt mildly glowing green.

"Yes, that was the other thing. The unnecessary compliments to his physical appearance.

"They don’t happen very often, and don’t seem to have very much meaning or intention behind them— Jackie often speaks like an unthinking kid— but when they do happen… they’re embarrassing. [...] It’s annoying how the rug is pulled out from under his feet in these moments when he’s 'embarrassed'. Like the conversation see-saw has temporarily shifted weight in the general’s favor."

I am not going to include excerpts from Chapter 6 because it's just the entire chapter.

I WILL SAY, HOWEVER, STEPPING ON THIS SCORPION BEFORE IT STINGS: they are not written in an RPFy manner and I don't think there's any grounds, including Vibes, of accusing Knifetrick of being like. Closet truthing or whatever. Also, while I think there's certainly Some Weirdness ESPECIALLY around the reaction, the romance itself is Not written in any way I'd call weird or problematic pre-clip; it's nothing inappropriate or like Weirdly Fetishy or whatever. Knifetrick is not #problematic or anything and I don't have beef with like the concept of liking it intrinsically; if I thought it was like. Abhorrent I wouldn't be sharing excerpts lmao dhjfnhdsbvdnfjh. Hence: if anyone uses this post or anyth like it to send harassment or bad faith ANYTHING to anyone involved with Knifetrick I will hunt you down in the fucking night even if it WAS #problematic that'd be the LITERAL OPPOSITE of productive and as it stands it's Literally Not. Essentially: Knifetrick is a (questionably-written /mean) fic using Ran and Jackie from The Pit as a vessel for a large chunk of the dynamics and headcanons of fanon /r c!beeduo in particular

And again, I would not call it problematic in any way (aside from the disingenuity of the insistence that it's TOTALLY UNRELATED TO BEEDUO and TOOOTALLY WASN'T INTENDED TO BE ROMANTIC GUYS like own your shit please)... IF it weren't for the advent of The Clip, which is calling in2 question the Entirety of the problem of /r-ing any variant of c!beeduo or any of Ranboo's characters at all

I really do not have an answer for this tbh. I genuinely wanna hear from the streamer on this more specifically because I like,,, I got no clue where 2 go from here? Do I just consider an arc retconned? Was it an issue of speaking abt a troubling subject kneejerk wise and I'm reading too much in2 it?

I just. I dunno

Tl;dr (AT LONG LAST)

- The Clip is a clip of a Discord stage where Ranboo (streamer) loudly explicitly decried shipping in a way that implicitly applies to characters he plays - This would be all well and good but is rendered complicated by the plot relevance of c!beeduo, which does not stop being shipping if it's /p'd due to it still necessarily being an examination of a particular intimacy in a way that is in canon hard to distinguish the /p, /qp, or /r nature of - Bishop's Knife Trick is an AO3 fic centered around using TFTSMP characters as /r c!beeduo expies which is not a bad thing in and of itself unless it also is covered under this moratorium - Things remain unclear until and unless we get clearer word from streamer, but considering Mr Live seems to be allergic to clarifying anything abt c!beeduo this is doubtful

*very little if any of the content I personally have made 4 c!beeduo has been posted publicly, for related reasons. You May have seen it if you're in servers w/ me, depending on Which Ones

[ryukyuan-sunflower]

Response to the Moral Question of the MugenxFuu Romance

This is a full response to an anonymous ask I received: 

“Can I ask why you ship fuugen? Isn’t Fuu a minor and Mugen is 19.”

This is a rather...complex and loaded question. There’s multiple things to address but I’ll start simple and work up from there. I will first go into my personal feelings on why I ship the pairing, evidence, and then the more complicated concept of the character’s ages both in reality, as well as in the fictional anime. Hopefully it will alleviate some distress on the issue. If it doesn’t, and you consider the age gap morally unacceptable, then it might unfortunately serve to make Mugen out to be a morally questionable character, implied romance aside.

The Simple Question: Why do I ship it? 

I ship Mugen x Fuu because it’s implied canon by the creators.

I believe strongly, and have found and provided plenty of evidence in my numerous other posts that support my belief, that Mugen and Fuu were written to have romantic feelings for one another. These feelings were never addressed, acted upon, nor explicitly spelled out for viewers. But the subtle implications of their unsaid feelings added up, episode by episode. The interviews of Shinichiro Watanabe, Ayako Kawasumi and Ginpei Sato only solidify my interpretations and findings.

The actual anime aside, here are the links to my posts concerning the interviews, if you are interested.

-Shinichiro Watanabe about Mugen’s Character.

-Ayako Kawasumi and Ginpei Sato about Fuu’s Feelings for Mugen in the Roman Album.

I adore the entire cast of Samurai Champloo, as much as by themselves as I do as a trio. I love Jin just as much as Mugen and Fuu. However, I do not see any implication of Jin having romantic feelings with either of them. His romance is canonically with Shino and his role for Fuu feels more brotherly and fatherly to me.

Personally, I am not a “crack shipper”. I am not someone who typically likes two characters and pairs them off together for my own amusement. I have nothing against crack pairings, nor their shippers, but it is not my taste. I enjoy romances that have some type of evidence or backing behind it. So it is not as if I simply ship Mugen and Fuu because I like Mugen more than Jin.

If hypothetically, all the things that happened with Mugen and Fuu happened with Jin and Fuu—if Jin saved her constantly, if Jin and Fuu had strange, intimate moments like the wrist grab scene,  if Fuu jumped in the way to save Jin’s life, if Fuu cried for Jin seven times, if Fuu’s voice brought Jin back from death, if Jin gave up his sword for Fuu—well, I would not be a fan of the Mugen and Fuu ship. I’d be a fan of Jin and Fuu. 

But that is simply not how the anime was written. 

On that same note of liking an implied romance, I am not as interested in blatant romance stories either. Implied, subtle romance is so interesting because it leaves enough clues that one has to find themselves, and then you are able to make your own interpretations and “what if” scenarios surrounding it. This is why I enjoy the story types of, say, the Souls video game series and its related titles. (Demon’s Souls, Dark Souls, Bloodborne, Sekiro). The story lines have to be figured out, and while there is evidence and clues dropped all over, nothing is ever specifically stated. But even so, we can come to solid conclusions that are difficult to disprove, but also never fully confirmed.

Samurai Champloo spells out very little for viewers. Example: Never does the anime state what island Mugen is from. We only know it’s in the Ryukyus. But based on historical evidence, and also symbolism in the show (the paantu and the trees in his flashback) we can assume it’s Tarama-shima or another island in Miyako.

Never do Mugen and Fuu state they have feelings for one another, but it’s in subtle dialogue, numerous times. Most blatant however, is when Sara tells Mugen “It’s as if you’ve never been loved by anyone.” and then Fuu proves her wrong by saving his life by throwing her own in the way, only seconds later.

Their actions fascinate me. Both Mugen and Fuu demonstrate self sacrificial behavior for each other, and show how much they care with actions rather than words. Most of all, I enjoy the romantic trope of “love leads to a character’s redemption.” Mugen’s feelings for Fuu is what redeems him from the sins of his past, and saves him from a life without meaning and only pain, anger and hatred. These aspects of his dark character are highlighted both by the dialogue of Mukuro in Episode 13 and Sara in Episode 21. Fuu being his redemption is also symbolized in her saving him on three separate occasions. The last incident, when she calls him back from death and the Paantu taking him away, is the most symbolic of his “redemption”.

Samurai Champloo is a direct response to the cynicism of Watanabe’s previous work, Cowboy Bebop. Where revenge and the past consumes Spike, ruining his future and love, Mugen is redeemed by love and is able to face his past and press on. 

Here is a fantastic article about the concept of Mugen’s love for Fuu being his redemption and also being a direct response to Cowboy Bebop. 

All of this aside, because of the second comment, I’m assuming that this isn’t necessarily what you were asking. 

“Isn’t Fuu a minor and Mugen is 19?” 

I’m guessing you’re implying that either the romantic pairing is impossible due to their age gap, or it’s morally wrong.

I was conflicted how to answer this, at first. I know this can be a triggering topic. So I decided on providing several explanations. I hope at least one answers the question properly, or at least sheds some light on the issue.

Either it will justify why there is nothing morally reprehensible about the Mugen x Fuu romance, or, it will unfortunately show that Mugen is morally questionable, depending on how the evidence is taken.

First, at 15, Fuu is not a minor in her time period. Second, Mugen is either 19 or 20 depending on the source.

Samurai Champloo is not set in one specific year of history, as the anime is not only anachronistic, it historically takes place in multiple years that could not coincide. In essence, Samurai Champloo is not one year, but “a chanpuru of one whole era.” This era is the Edo/Tokugawa era, which includes the years of 1603-1868.

In the Tokugawa Era, Fuu is considered an adult. She is a young adult, yes, but in the eyes of everyone, she is an adult. This is both historically accurate, and is also demonstrated numerous times in the anime. Fuu’s sexualization and her being seen in a romantic way is never frowned upon by any of the characters in the entire series.

Brief disclaimer: Nowhere in my love of the Fuugen pairing or fan interpretations of the characters’ futures, do I see any sort of sexual relationship between Mugen and Fuu developing when she is 15. After they part ways, is where I like to make my fan conclusions on them meeting again when she’s older.

I also want to clarify here and now, that I’m not a supporter of a 15 year old entering a romantic relationship of any kind, let alone a sexual one in real life. I think that teens should work on themselves and not get swept away by romance and sexuality, especially frivolously. It’s irresponsible and dangerous. But, it’s also unrealistic to believe all young people will never fall in love, whether it’s fake or real. If there happened to be a man who was 5 years older than a girl and the two did develop feelings for each other, I believe nothing should be pursued between them until they are both of age.

Adulthood in the Tokugawa Era

I want to first talk about the concept of Fuu being a minor. In short, she is not a minor in her time period.

To begin with reality first, the life expectancy hundreds of years ago was much lower than now. In Japan now, the average life expectancy is in the 80s. But hundreds of years ago, it was estimated to be about 50. Women in particular had the complication of fatality from childbirth. Led makeup, childbirth, and also STDs were a huge threat for courtesans of the time period as well. Many women died in their twenties.

As for the concept of ”adulthood”, the adult age of 18 only started in the Meiji Restoration (late 1800s- early 1900s) when Japan contacted the west and emulated its practices. The age of 18 being an adult nowadays is largely based on the setup of the education system. Whether 18 is too young or too old is a matter up for debate and varies country to country. 

Specifically, in the Tokugawa Era, the age of adulthood was considered when one entered puberty. This was generally 15 for a male and 12 for a female. 

Here is a link to the full article on the topic of the shifting coming of age, if you are interested.

In the case of aristocratic children, such as boys raised as samurai, the Genpuku ceremony that transitioned children to adults varied in age. During the early Tokugawa era, it was 15-17, while later into the Tokugawa era, during less civil unrest, the age dropped to as low as 13. At this age, these young men could then marry and were likely pressured to do so. Marriages in the Tokugawa Era were very different than nowadays as well. Many nobles and royalty had their daughters married off at young ages such as 8 years old.Though, the sexual nature of these relationships did not develop until the girl was likely of child bearing age, which was in the teens.

Taking the historical 12 year old age into account, Fuu being 15, is then already three years into adulthood. 

Fuu’s Depiction as a Woman in the Anime

In regards to Fuu’s maturity, she has no guardian, nor caretaker, which shows she is an independent adult making her own decisions. Yes, Mugen and Jin are her bodyguards, but they are not her legal guardians, because she does not need one. It is her who commands them and leads them. After they part ways, she is fifteen years old (perhaps a year older based on the time span of the anime) traveling the country alone.

She was forced to grow up very fast. Not only is she an orphan, but Fuu’s resourcefulness allows her to survive on her own. She tricks two complete strangers to escort her across Japan. But Fuu is fully functional as an adult, arguably more than Mugen or Jin in some ways. She works, fishes, cooks, sews, tends to wounds etc. Fuu is by no means innocent to mature situations either. She’s seen Mugen and Jin kill numerous people in front of her, which is traumatizing in itself.

In regards to Fuu’s sexualization,on separate occasions, there are bath scenes in the anime, showing Fuu partially nude. There are also scenes of her undressing. Morally correct or not, it is clear she was sexualized like many young anime females.

Aside from that, here are examples of male characters viewing Fuu as an adult woman, romantically or sexually.

Episode 3 and 4: Fuu is thrown in a brothel. While the legality of her being forced against her will just for the sake of paying off a debt is somewhat in question, the fact that she is 15 in a brothel is not. Brothels were not an undercover organization. It was completely legal in Tokugawa Japan, and Fuu being 15 as a courtesan was not illegal. When an ugly rodent man buys her, it’s served as comedy.

Episode 5: Fuu becomes a ukiyo-e model, the backwards beauty, for Moronobu Hishikawa, who was a real historical figure. This grown man, probably around Jin and Mugen’s age or maybe older, also is not considered a creep for his attraction to her. In fact, it’s not even considered wrong that he paints a nude picture of a 15 year old. Again, because she’s deemed a woman in this time period.

Episode 8: Nagamitsu, who is leagues older than Mugen and Jin, asks Fuu to become the “harem of his heart”. He is attracted to her, sees her as a younger version of his wife when he first met her, and even asks her on a date, to which she accepts. This entire interaction is played off as comedy, and not that he’s some creepy grown man attracted to a minor. More like, he’s a bumbling buffoon. His two sidekicks, the beatboxer and Ogura do not intervene, nor make a comment that it’s wrong he is interested in a 15 year old when he’s in thirties or forties. Because quite simply, in this time period, it’s not wrong.

Episode 16: Okuru tells Fuu that “a woman with a healthy appetite is a good woman” when she is devouring fish.

If you stand firm that it is still morally wrong and all these characters were creeps for being interested or saying these words to a 15 year old, that is fine. If you think it is morally wrong to ship Mugen and Fuu because of the age gap, and refuse to believe that the two are an implied romance, that is fine too. I can’t convince everyone.

However, I will make the counter argument then, that liking Mugen as a character means liking a morally questionable character. Romance and feelings aside, the reason for this is simply how he treats and talks to Fuu.

Mugen’s Questionable Dialogue to Fuu

If shipping them is wrong, then what Mugen directly says and does to Fuu is just as wrong. In my opinion, it makes it weirder if he doesn’t develop feelings for her.

Episode 2: In the original Japanese dub, Mugen tells an unconscious, intoxicated Fuu that he’s going to rape her. “Okasu kureru” is the dialogue.

The English changes this to “Let’s strip her and dump her.”

Episode 11: When Fuu asks why Jin needs to go see a woman when she’s around, Mugen then responds “Because you’re flat chested”, not to be confused with “You’re a child.” When she says her kimono makes her look slender, Mugen calls her a liar and then says “Show me.” He asks Fuu to undress for him and show him her breasts...

Episode 20: Mugen stands up naked for Fuu in the hot spring even though she’s clearly flustered. Exposing oneself to a minor is an offense in the modern era. But he doesn’t stop there. He berates her, and then peeks his head out to look at her naked too.

All of these examples are meant as fluff and comedy too, no matter how offensive they can be. It also implies his attraction, interest and his consideration that she is indeed a woman. This is then furthered in his dialogue with Jin.

Episode 12: When they read Fuu’s diary, Mugen asks the odd question to Jin. “Man to man, what do you think of her?” This “man to man”, implies Mugen wants to know how Jin feels about Fuu as a woman.

As for a debatable canon example, I have the need to bring up the Samurai Champloo: Sidetracked video game on PS2. In Japanese, it is entirely voiced by the same cast as the anime: Kazuya Nakai, Ayako Kawasumi and Ginpei Sato. In English, Mugen is not Steve Blum, but Fuu and Jin are the same voice actors as the anime: Kari Whelgren and Kirk Thornton.

In it, Mugen develops an attraction to a girl who looks nearly identical to Fuu: brown hair in a ponytail, big brown eyes, pink kimono, three hairpin beads. The kicker is her name is Yuu. The even bigger kicker is that she is younger than Fuu.

Here are the links to the scenes. Japanese audio is much better, as a warning.

Link to English, Fuu catches them alone and tells Jin “I had no idea Mugen was a cradle robber!”

Link to Japanese: Fuu calls Mugen a “lolicon”.

When the girl asks “Do you like me? You can lie if you want.” he tells her:

Link to Japanese: “Suki da. Uso jane.”

Link to English: “I like you. I ain’t lyin’.”

And the two share a kiss, before she dies. Worth mentioning, Fuu also admits to being jealous about all this and a fortune teller tells Fuu that this is her “heart talking.”

While debatable canon, the video game still highlights this concept that Mugen will even like a girl younger than Fuu (anywhere from 12-14), so long as she resembles Fuu.

If we pretend for a moment that Fuu is indeed a minor in her time period, then that makes Mugen’s actions and comments out to be even worse. Not only is he a pervert, but he’s then a pervert flirting and making sexual comments about a ”minor”.

Underaged Girls and Age Gaps in Other Japanese Romances

If you still believe that there is something morally wrong, regardless of the time period it takes place in, I have more modern examples in media.

Modern Japanese shoujo manga and anime (shoujo being a genre directed at teenage girls) is rife with romance stories of older guys with younger girls. It’s not frowned upon in Japan, and even for its readers in the west.

I will give you some major examples I can think of, off the top of my head.

Inuyasha: Inuyasha and Kagome. Inuyasha is over 150 years old (not counting the other 50 years he was comatose). Yes, he ages slower as a half demon, but that is still 150 years of experience in life. Kagome meanwhile, is 15 years old and does not come from the Sengoku era. She’s from the modern era. If one wants to argue that Inuyasha doesn't count because every decade for him is one year, meaning he’s supposed to be “15 in human years”, then there is the matter of Miroku. Miroku is 18 years old, and fondles not only Kagome who is 15, but Sango who is 16. And he and Sango later become a romance.

Shugo Chara: Ikuto and Amu have an age gap of 17 and 12. While there is a love triangle element, it is debatable that Ikuto is more her true love interest in the manga. This takes place in the modern era.

Dengeki Daisy: Kurosaki and Teru have an age gap of 24 and 16. This also takes place in the modern era.

Incidentally, all of these aforementioned romances share some parallels to Mugen and Fuu in some way. Whether the guy is argumentative with the girl, a homeless wanderer, antagonist by nature, teasing about her lack of a figure, a bodyguard/protector role etc. 

These are just a few of the more pure Shoujo examples directed at young girls.This does not include age gaps between characters, or underaged girls in anime meant for men or adults in general. They can get far more morally questionable, in my honest opinion. Mugen and Fuu barely scratches a surface. There is clearly a cultural gap between Asia and the West and the concept of age gaps, regardless of one’s personal moral stance on the subject.

Mugen and Fuu’s Actual Age Gap and Maturity

In the Tokugawa Era, their age gap of 4 to 5 years is incredibly small. Even nowadays, that age gap is very small, if Fuu was a legal adult in modern times.

Tsuru-himegimi, the real daughter of Shogun Tsunayoshi was 8 years old when she was married to her husband Tsunanori of Kii, who was 12 years her senior.

As for the anime’s depiction of them, there was never a sense of “Fuu is child. Mugen is a man”. It always felt like the two were in a similar age bracket. 

I must ask the question, if Fuu or Mugen’s ages was never revealed, would it change the context of the story at all? If Fuu was older, would it change it? Personally, I don’t think so. In this case, because she is both physically developed and also deemed a woman in the anime and historically, it changes nothing.

Their interactions, their bickering, their attitudes, and the way Mugen yells at her, and the way Fuu reprimands him, it always felt like they were similar. They both exhibited many immature, innocent qualities, as well as adult qualities. It was Jin who had a more mature demeanor, being the calm, responsible one, who would rather not intervene with their nonsense. This is another reason why I see Jin as a father figure to Fuu: a representation of the samurai who smells of sunflowers that she did not have growing up.

These images here show their similarities in behavior quite well. And there are many more examples.

Conclusion

A good, well developed character is not a perfect one. There is no denying Mugen is flawed, morally questionable and sometimes straight out an antagonist. He steals, he kills, he was an ex-pirate who likely raided and pillaged��� Realistically, he would have no qualms about being attracted or developing feelings for a woman who is 4 or 5 years his junior, let alone the other crazy stuff he’s done. Especially when, in their time period, there is nothing wrong about it at all.

Regardless if his morality is in question or not, what makes the implied romance so interesting is the fact that he didn’t act upon anything sexually with Fuu. His actions towards her were selfless, and Mugen developed greatly by the end. But because of his actions and words,and jealousy, it does not come off as simply a sibling or familial relationship that the two have. This differs from how Jin and Fuu interact.

Most importantly, Fuu serves as the catalyst for Mugen’s growth and redemption of his sins. Unlike Jin, Mugen saves Fuu time and and time again, making him her hero, despite being seemingly an ex-criminal that only works in self interest. Jin did not require this change, as he was always an honorable samurai from the start.

Both men found purpose for different reasons.

Mugen needed love.

Jin needed duty.

I think that covers everything. Well, unless your question is simply why do I ship them when the characters are young and I’m older than them.

As of the time of making this post, I am a 23 years old woman. The first time I ever set eyes on the anime, I was 8 or 9 years old. As a kid, I had my first innocent, childlike suspicion of a romance between them when Mugen first went to save Fuu from the “bad place”, being the brothel in episode 4 without any reason to, while Jin didn’t. Also, he saved her in Ep 1 and 2 and Jin didn’t.

The first time I got to watch the whole anime, I was 13 and saw the full story play out. And at that point, I was more convinced. Over the years, I rewatched, looked into a lot of the history and symbolism used in the anime, analyzed the episodes, and I became more convinced. I shipped it when I was Fuu’s age of 15. I shipped it when I was Mugen’s age of 19/20. And, I will likely continue to cherish the beautiful story of Samurai Champloo and the implied subtle romance of Mugen and Fuu for years to come.

Perhaps it is a reminder of the purity and innocent nature of love for me. These two did more for each other, cared more for each other, and were more entertaining with each other than so many cliche, blatant romance stories.