#its about identity its about history its about SO MUCH
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What You Really Want
Milo mouths off about a man dating his long time crush before immediately learning the lesson that he should be less trusting of strange voices promising to fulfill his desires
Pretty standard straight to gay himbo/jockification! It will also be my final story for some time I believe, so I do hope you enjoy! -Occam
“It’s no fair that they literally have it all.” Like many a ‘nice guy’ Milo has spent an inordinate amount of time skulking social media and disparaging more physically gifted men as he stumbles across them. The root of his despair is not difficult to ascertain, his eyes burning with envy make quite clear the inner monologue of ‘girls always date assholes.’ He sneers as he comes across the most recent post of his friend and crush, Juliet. The jealous man of course knows next to nothing about the character of James, the jock-type now dating her, but judging by the gleaming smirk and the bulky arms of a killer hanging from his shoulders, the judgemental dweeb has more than enough evidence to speculate.
Delving into his memories, Milo’s face burns with embarrassment as he recalls mentioning his crush to Juliet, ‘Oh!’ her bright eyes shift uncomfortably and her cheeks begin to blush enough to match the pink tint she threw on this morning. Milo’s fist clenches as she almost giggles in her discomfort, ‘sorry Milo I guess- Well, I guess I just thought you were gay?’ After this Milo played it cool, he thinks. Hand scratching the back of his head as he asserts his straight identity and the two go on to have a meal far more quiet and awkward than usual. When new-boyfriend James comes to pick up Juliet, Milo forces a smile before staring daggers at his back as the pair walk away.
This brings us to the present hate scrolling session in which Milo is more than absorbed. Lips curl into a sneer as he traces the impossible to ignore curves of this must-be dullard’s defined body. Milo scoffs as he sees the litany of women that must make up the man’s dating history. “Bet they won’t even last a week, ha! I mean judging by how much the douche spends in the gym I bet he’s just using her as a beard anyway.”
With this final rather homophobic assertion, the nerd’s phone flashes before going dark, “What the-” before he has to determine whatever caused this, he goes stiff as a strange voice resounds through his head. ‘Tired of all the big boys getting what they want, hmm?’ Immediately concerned he’s lost his mind, Milo gets to powering back on his phone to call for help. ‘Now now, Milo. Do not worry your little head. I am here to help. Would you not like the chance to be just like them?’ Just like them. Envy burns through his veins greater than anything. Sensing this immediately, whatever this voice is seizes upon his clearly fragile psyche, its laughter steely and alien, ‘Ah ha ha. I thought so.’
Dropping his phone once more, Milo tries to drill the voice, “Wh- what are you exactly. Are you a dem- hm, an angel?” The voice answers almost before he even finishes the thought, ‘It matters not what I am. All that matters are your desires. Now. Do you wish to be all you desire, all this James embodies? All that he is in your head.” Miles gulps and almost starts drooling at the idea, just like James. Women at his fingertips whenever he wants, a body sculpted by the gods while keeping a far better mind than that oaf could ever afford. With next to no hesitation or forethought, Milo nods and the world goes dark.
When he awakens the poorly mannered man finds it’s the next day. His phone rests in his hand and when opened he finds it zoomed in on a picture of James’ meaty bicep. Milo rolls his eyes and tosses his phone aside before going to stand. Making it halfway up he grunts in pain as he only then discovers morning wood more pressing and turgid than he’s ever encountered. Falling back down he clutches at the pain in his crotch from his cock being forcibly yanked by his underwear. Hands now grasping it he gasps as he finds it filling them far more than it has any right to.
Well now, while they’re already down there he might as well have some fun right? After briefly struggling to get his waistband over his swollen package his mouth falls open in shock as he’s finally able to appraise the almost unrecognizable cock hanging from his crotch. It’s like none he’s seen before, not that he generally observes dicks of course. Far more impressive than he imagined a dick could be. His fingertips can scarcely meet his palm when he tries to grasp it, and as he begins rubbing it it feels leagues more sensitive than it has before now, as if nerve endings are multiplying. Looking to his awaiting phone he sees the photo of James and what’s her name as he begins masturbating outright.
Seeing a bulge in James’ strained pants he grunts as he returns to stare at his own suddenly substantial cock. More like him. The already thicker rod strains as he reflexively humps into his hand, forcing his grip wider as it expands to simply need more room. The new veins painting the length of his nascent ten inch dick surge higher up its length as he swears he can see them pulse and bulge with each racing heartbeat. Beneath his thrusting hands, bouncing as his hips continue to forcefully thrust with more strength than he has, his balls similarly grow heavier, larger as they send hormones flowing through him enough to metamorphosize and, more immediately, cause pre to stream and coat his fingers.
Milo leans his head back as he is bursting with a need for release greater than he can understand. He shifts his jaw as it twinges with the pleasure of growth, widening and strengthening into one fit for titan. Below his newly defined chin, his neck thickens and moans grow deeper as an Adam's apple bulges out of his throat. Hearing his voice echo deeper throughout his bedroom, his heady pleasure comes to a head as he is struck with the bizarre urge to lick the pre off his fingers. Before he’s able to acquire or express shock and disgust, his eyes blast open and he is again staring at the image of James, more like- and he blows his load.
The moment of release may as well have shut him down once more, pleasure overloads him like a flashbang as every inch of his body feels at once. Drool drips from his plumper lips as his mind is fried and his hips continue to thrust without any input or awareness, sending stains across his wall and splattering into his darker hair as it begins to pull shorter and tint darker. Eyebrows thicken and cover more of his forehead as his brow hangs lower over his eyes staining brown and growing duller.
His whole form tenses as he finally achieves release, staring at the image of his, uh, competition. Arms flex as his hands crack wider, fingers stretch longer, skin grows rougher. For the first time in his life definition appears on his arms, biceps and triceps compete for which can increase faster, which can catch more eyes, which can rival those alluring arms of James. Beneath shoulders packing on weight are pits that darken with curls now thicker, a deeper brown nearing black as the forest strives to prevent any light from breaking the canopy. Similarly they moisten with the masculine heady musk that they are perfectly designed to disseminate, powerful enough to allure any twink towards his dick, or uh, huh.
Milo moans as this seemingly intrusive thought makes itself at home in his morphing psyche. Barely returning to sentience enough to realize the stray gay thought, he arches his back and stretches as if he were waking up. Mindlessly he wipes the cum staining his larger hands on the new dark treasure trail as it itches and slowly inches up from pubes unshaved. Feeling the hint of an Adonis belt he sits up with a shock, the feeling of something he has long envied bringing back his awareness.
Despite the obvious differences it takes far too long for him to be aware of, to truly notice what has become of him. He struggles to make sense of the effort it takes to move his new larger limbs. He grabs at his new hair and sucks drool through his teeth as he tries to understand how it’s changed texture and color so totally, did he dye it and forget or what? The gears in his mind slowly turn as his fingers move to scratch an itch under his arms, struggling through the dank jungle of curls. Thoughtlessly he brings his sweat-wet fingers to his nose and grimaces. “Fuck man, I smell like an, uh, like a, unnh-” he moans quietly as he’s unable to even finish the sentence, instead an image of James forces its way to the front of his mind and two now-malnourished brain cells spark together and strain to form a thought.
“Oh fuck I’m turning into a imbe-, an uh imbekle? Ugh, an uh- a dumb jock.” Milo bites his lips and flexes an arm to try and assuage his nerves, to get his attention focused on anything but his anxieties. Fortunately to this end, seeing his bulging biceps he feels his larger cock begin to stir. Some semblance of rationality knows ceding to his wanting package is probably what led to this encroaching fog over his mind. His skin begins to prickle as all-around it grows more sensitive. Beyond these skin deep sensations it also seems as if darker hairs are beginning to spread out wherever his follicles will allow.
Seeing hair beginning to prickle his chest and blanket his legs his mind produces images of hairy men he has leered at through the years. His neck twitches as whatever dregs of the pathetic skirtchaser he once was rise up and try to combat his new predilections. He’s straight, he’s always been straight. Right? His mouth goes dry as he tries to remember ever having dated a woman in the past. Barring that, only just able to recall that something is happening to him, only just able to remember that he is transforming into some alien self, Milo tries to produce an image of what he used to look like. And he cannot.
His mouth falls open as it often does whenever he struggles to produce a thought, making it almost his default state. Mouth-breathing mouth ajar he fully experiences the thick air of his bedroom as it fills with his new musk. The room around him begins to dissolve and reform into surroundings that reinforce who he is now, that prove this is who he has always been. Clean pressed laundry dirty and shift into unwashed gym clothes that help cloud the room with his stink. Posters of whatever movies and video games he enjoys corrupt into images celebrating the impressive male form, all distinctly stained from the years of hanging on Milo’s bedroom walls. He hears clanking outside of his bedroom as bookshelves collapse and reform into weights heavier than he would be able to lift.
Milo stumbles to his larger feet and ignores the hefty weight of his balls and cock bobbing in the air as he drags himself out of his bedroom to find a mirror. He leaves sweaty footprints larger than any shoes he owns on the tile of the bathroom as he bumbles in. Leaning over the sink his lips quiver as he sees a razor clogged with hair darker than he feels he should have. Sooner than the doubts arrive they vacate as a thick, stubbled beard rapidly bursts onto his face. Looking up he smirks as he sees a thick mustache surges over his upper lip, looking just like the ones he appreciates, just like he has always been into. His eye twitches and he grunts as his hair retracts once more into something far more intentional and stylish. At the same time pecs suddenly bulge larger and hang lower as Milo leans heavier over the bathroom sink.
His eyes glaze over as complex thoughts once more become too elusive in the face of his rising lusts. Muscles bulge larger as his back and legs creak, stretching him taller as thighs and shoulders widen and continue putting on mass. Feet spread like fins on the floor as his hands widen and sweatily slide on the ceramic sink. His mouth continues to water as he inspects all these increasingly masculine changes and his cock continues to throb. Milo bites his lip as new sensations arise from his cock once more, this time the change is apparent as his foreskin regrows, making his cock look even thicker as its head grows hooded and he struggles not to immediately break into masturbation at the powerful image of his own seductive form.
Milo’s barely functioning mind struggles to argue for any reason to not just return to the immeasurable delights of gratifying his all-encompassing urges. He stays his hands for a moment before the greatest horror yet rears its head. A monologue begins in his mind that is not his own, that cannot be his own. Dull laughter echoes through his increasingly vacant mind as a voice even slower and deeper than that which sounds from his new vocal chords, “Yooo broo come onnnnn. Give up, give in. This is what you wanted, ‘s what we wanted huhuhuh.”
He feels a pressure in his balls as they almost churn with the otherworldly need that seemingly always flows through him. He can’t help but imagine the men he’s going to bed with his new endowment, how many cocks he’s going to take in his new powerful ass. Drool trickles from his lips through the dense black stubble that coats his face denser with each second, with each breath. Spit continues down the length of his more defined face before dripping onto weighty, similarly furred pecs. His heavier hands slowly creep towards the hardening cock standing tall and long from the jungle of pubes. Before he’s able to assist his thrusting hips however, his lusty haze is interrupted by his phone chiming. His mind immediately thinks it must be James which fills him with conflicting emotions of rage and giddiness. “Ohh bro maybe he’s inviting us over. It’s been toooo long since we fucked huhuh-”
Milo pointedly tries to ignore his hairier, bulkier reflection as he stumbles out of the bathroom to check his phone. Unfortunately he catches a glimpse which makes it all the more difficult to ignore the throbbing weight dripping, almost pouring, pre onto the floor. Despite it all he stands strong, quieting this other voice as it urgently tries to convince him to give in before he’s able to pick up his phone. In a final act of resistance, or perhaps impotence, he has the lofty idea of calling for help before his mind goes completely blank and, seeing the notification, he instinctually goes to his messages to find who texted him. It’s Juliet!
First his heart flutters before he’s absolutely confused at the sensation. She’s just his bestie? Weird. He shakes off whatever that was and gets on to reading the message, “heyy girlie- which of these do you want me to post? Oh ya and lmao, are you and james cool if I do the last one?” At the mention of James his pulse again races and there are butterflies in his stomach far more powerful than whatever bizarre feelings he had but moments ago. No time to dwell, Milo starts swiping through the images sent. They’re a photoset of their little group outing to a halloween party last week, the trio, Milo, James and Jules dressed up as a group, as X-men! Respectively dressed as Wolverine, Cyclops and Jean Grey.
He smirks as he starts chubbing up again thinking of how easily he was able to pass as the hairy beast. His eyes then return to see James’ bubble butt in trademark spandex, which only makes it harder to not lose control then and there, moaning as he imagines playing with that ass. Holding to whatever well of willpower remains within him Milo holds strong and keeps his hands above waist level. Finally he gets to the specific image Juliet mentioned, one of him and James messily making out on the dance floor. James yanks at the hairy Milo’s hair, visor half hanging off as Milo reciprocates by shoving his hand into James’ pants. Fuck that’s hot.
Without even touching his needy cock, without any pleading from the new voice in his head, without a single chance to hold back. Simply from seeing the steamy image of him and James, Milo’s mind is overrun with memories and desires of the new man he is. The man he ever was and always will be. And for the second time today, but not the last, he loses control. Cum splatters against his phone as his mind goes blank anew with rushing pleasure. Painting himself once more with his most-used utensil he laughs dumbly as he realizes how swiftly he just came. Almost with pathetic haste, though now he’s quite unfamiliar with any sense of shame. The voice that only just wormed its way into his head spills from his mouth as it fully and forevermore wrests control as the true Milo.
“Huhuhuh guess I should work on my hair trigger,” He grunts as he looks at his phone and texts back some variation of ‘girl that’s porn you can’t post that!!!’ he turns his mind where it goes more often than anywhere in his new life. He wonders what James is doing and immediately texts him. Waiting for a reply Milo heads off to the gym to get a pump in before presumably going to meet him, not worrying about cleaning up or covering his scent. The gym’s for smelling like a man right? He certainly wouldn’t mind if everyone else followed his lead huhuh. Milo bites his lip trying to ignore his hardening cock as he makes his way out of the apartment clad in too-tight, stained gym clothes.
Before he even makes it out the complex he gets a text from James and promptly changes course. Immediately Milo’s racing down the street to his lover’s apartment. Cock already snaking down his shorts and creating a stain at its nadir, Milo hopes he can keep his needy cock at bay until he makes it. Thinking of the alternative work out he’s to enjoy in bed with James, Milo struggles to not moan obscenely as he waddles as quickly as he can into the lobby of James’ building.��Heart racing with excitement he can’t wait to see James in person. Jittery with nerves, it feels like he’s going to meet the man for the first time. Hah! Milo promptly ignores the idea and starts to get some stretching in before their session. Trying to practice mindfulness with a mind thicker than mud he quickly finds himself possessed with memories of their countless times fucking in the past. Easy enough as the pair have been doing so for years. Still nerves assail him as his cock continues to strain his shorts. As the elevator doors click open he smirks as he was able to make it this far without blowing his third load of the day. His cock throbs with anticipation for its release soon to come, and impatiently awaits each and every similar session to follow.
#male tf#mental change#straight to gay#male transformation#hair growth#muscle tf#jockification#dumber#reality change
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It's hard talking about the disrespect to Greek mythology and religion when every argument people brings to the table is "look at this original novel that is adapted into a movie that is turned into a tv show that didn't follow the original plot" as if the Greek culture is on par with fictional story instead of a tradition and heritage of real life people.
A media that is broadcast to the public and make accessible to everyone that erased the values and lesson of a cultural story still can do harm when it feeds misunderstanding and misinterpretion of the culture it originated from.
Greek people has the right to be upset when their culture keeps getting misrepresented, doesn't matter the good intentions behind it, why must it be at the expense of Greek culture?
You can create arts that is so beautiful and so praises by many, and years from now you could look back and see what an amazing experience and community you have created out of it. But at the same time you also continue feeding the distorted ideas and flawed understanding about a culture as a whole.
All because you took from a culture and want to tell your own story.
Retelling is telling back the story. Any addition or new ideas you bring is when there's part in the original story that is vague or open for interpretations. Even then, when you elaborate, you follows the already presented ideas that the original story already established.
If it so beloved to you and so meaningful to you, why couldn't you be faithful when adapting and retelling with the talents you have?
Shouldn't it be better if you created an original story inspired by it? If you feels that the values and standards are not to your taste, but you so loved the stories and could related to it, isn't it better to create original characters and settings with your own voice and narrative with the story inspiration as the backdrop?
At this point, what is greek mythology and lore to you? That makes you so passionate so inspired, that spark your imagination that encourage you to be creative but it is at the ruin of old age history that is meaningful for the Greek identity. Do you really appreciate the values and moral that you gained from the stories, or did you forget yourself along the way?
I couldn't have said it better! I agree to all that because that is exactly my sentiment as well! On one hand of course I am proud that Greek mythology contnues to inspire and people want to create stuff on them or that even now there are people who think the values of Greek Mythology are universal and they are!
But as you said it pains me to no limits when stories that were literally created from people based on their culture and religion to pass on messages are not only distorted beyond recognition but also to a degree where nowadays most people of Greek mythology liking spectrum know only how terrible villains some men are (in actual mythology they are complicated personas) and how weak women are (there are literlly figures in Greek mythology that are so strong personas that honestly I am shocked. See Helen for example how she is the most projected persona as a pretty face that does nothing when Helen literally taks back to Aphrodite, she is the only one who sees through Odysseus's disguise, she has knowledge of medicine and so much more for once) Mythology loses all its meaning, all its allegory and all its cultural spectrum because as you said people do not use it to retell the story, they use the word "retelling" as their excuse to just tell a story that fits them by using the popularity of greek mythology and yes as you said why cannot they say their original stories while using inspiration from Greek mythology?
Honestly I have nothing to add! You said it all dear Anon!
#katerinaaqu answers#greek mythology#tagamemnon#retellings#“retelling” means “tell the story again” it doesn't mean “make it unrecognizable”!#people still can critisize regardless of pure intentions#ancient greek myth#ancient greek myths#ancient greek culture#food for thought
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i have an update
so the way they address everyone taking this new sitting down is..
dalish elves in the area became veil jumpers. They explored arlathan and learned about its shitty history. "it's okay to grieve something imperfect". Bro. BRO. WHAT.
First of all, why y'all treating this like it was taylor swift fans finding out she does organized crime? 💀
Second of all... Why they couldn't have done that in the THOUSANDS of years before? Wtf is different now? Why in the past 8 years things suddenly became different? Did Solas invent AI? Did Dorian's political activism somehow get rid of a rigid societal hierarchy tens of thousands of years deep? And people didn't think that THAT story was worth telling more than these gods coming back? 🫠
Also people expect me to believe that Dalish elves are just extremely progressive and wouldn't think twice about abandoning what they thought were their identity?? Not all of them were in love with Solas. No firetrucking way. Religions have been built on so much Less.
At least letting them discover on their own was a small kindness. But I just. idk man.
These were Choices.
so im playing an elf rook, I'm not that far in the game, and I have complaints. If later portions of the game actually address my complaints, please please please let me know. I can barely go on like this.
I purposefully made my rook NOT dalish so I don't have to have an opinion about the elven gods returning (you see where I'm going with this?)
After seeing the conversation with bellara and the veil jumpers, and just how Readily they accepted the news that "our gods are back and they're evil" was such a WTFbbq?? moment for me.
First of all, not Dalish, not my god. Just because elf doesn't mean can't be andrastian. Beliefs are beliefs.
Second of all, elves used to worship these gods. They used to do it even though they were persecuted for it. And they worshipped these gods enough to adopt their symbolism as face tattoos in their rite of adulthood tradition. And they did it even when they (well, some of them) weren't sure if these gods were even real.
How y'all gonna expect me to believe that they're gonna take that news sitting down?? HOW??
"our gods (who we didn't even know were Real or a Myth) are back"
"cool cool cool. Let's stop them." (While invoking a different god from the same pantheon. How ironic is that?)
Y'all gonna at least act surprised that they've come back after answering exactly none of your prayers? Y'all gonna at least wonder about how your world view is gonna change? Hoe your culture will be futher demonized by the anti-elf racists? What about pillars of emotional comfort just disappearing?
Okay, so one can argue that true believers would absolutely think these gods were real. They've just been real quiet lately. Then, how would you not react to them coming back? They could finally start answering your specific requests again! I mean, even Beyoncé fans reacted more than this when she dropped an album unannounced. And they raved in the streets when they found out it was in a new genre. It was just a new genre of music, she's even still a singer!
Like if a Swiftie finds out Taylor Swift transitioned her career and is now running a drug cartel and illegally harvesting organs, they're not gonna just be like "oh, ok, let's stop her." They're gonna at least be concerned, right? They're gonna at least wonder if the news is accurate, right? 😵💫
After this, all the awesome richness of Thedas instantly flattened for me. What happened to the world building, the continuity? Does "no canon" mean literally all previous world building goes out the window?
I'm too shocked to go on atm...
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ahem. im ok now . goodnight
#read The Summer Hikaru Died#its a queer eldritch horror manga about growing up queer in a rural town. about losing someone close and grieving them. some ship of theseus#philosophy about dying and coming back except You didn't come back you're lying to yourself#its about identity its about history its about SO MUCH#its about two young boys havinf the worst summer of their life and i adore them#50% of that spiel didnt make sense cuz im half asleep. i stayed up way too late. goodnight#chris noises#hgsn
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dysgraphic artiƨts risɘ UP!!!!!
#raise your pencils!!!! and erasers. to fix the backwards letters 😔#sorry still thinking about my weirdness with my art professors. yknow a lot of em have been really pushing us as#students to make our personal identities a major part of like our 'brand' as artists#which. well from an art history major perspective thats a very contentious and nuanced topic. i love a lot of artists who live this way#and i think its great seeing my peers who focus on identity thrive. but also as an fine arts major (double major fool LOL)#i keep getting pushed by teachers into like. specific '____ artist' identities???#specificaly woman artist. which is a little bizarre because im a bit fat and a bit gnc so im generally like. ungendered? in day-to-day life#(which doesnt actually matter to me directly that much honestly LOL people tend to view me as like. buddy? buddy or pal.)#(not man. not woman. not anything human. sometimes i remind people of a beloved dog. which. hkdsahjk thats its own can of worms)#(a can of worms that also doesnt matter much to me directly because im a wannabe furry who chose to be the dog when playing house as a kid)#(LOL so um. well. theres that) but yeah i dunno i dont really consider myself a woman artist. its been. shockingly (and sometimes luckily?)#irrelevant to most of my life and experiences and art (although dont get me wrong misogyny is very real and very present) so i dont#have a whole lot to say about it from an art perspective. you could also call me all kinds of things. a queer artist. a mixed race artist#again technically correct. some aspects more visible in my work than others. but also very technical. i focus on race a lot in in my#art historical work but i dunno how much my drawings have to say. except that i keep making too many mixed ocs LOL#i dunno i just think my professors gotta focus that energy away from tokenizing me and over to supporting like actual#capital W Woman artists capital Q Queer artists capital A Artists of Colour who are doing far more interesting things than I#far more thought out and engaged in these topics directly. i just kind of stumble into my art blindly and confused <3#sorry that was a long tangent WHAT IM SAYING Is despite all that: i do consider myself a capital D Dysgraphic artist#i think its an unmovable constant of my art and the way i draw and the way my hands move. the untrained eye doesnt seem to be as aware#of it directly. but those who are familiar can probably see it. the dysgraphia LOL if not just from whenever i write a letter or number#half of them are busted and frantically fixed HDKJSDJDS but its in all my art. if u can see it <3 ive been trying to embrace it#dygraphic artists raise your pencils indeed!! and throw away the eraser!!! make the legibility of your words everyone elses problem!!!#what does that say? what is that sketch? none of my business! none of your business!! its the business of my hand and the pencil alone#motor skill and spatial issues take the wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel
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really?? it's been so long since ive had a long rest cutscene and i dont even get one after everything with ansur???
#personal#please. i am begging for story progression#like obviously im getting a huge amount of actual story progression. ive finished every side quest and nearly every companion quest#all i have left are voss (and orpheus presumably) and gortash and... well that's gonna be the entire game right?#other than the final boss of course but that goes without saying#interesting listening to the elfsong camp song now. much to think about#hmm. i do think the first emperor identity reveal was more interesting and impactful#i feel like it took so long to get to baldur's gate and im not from here so its history is....not that important to me#BUT I DONT EVEN GET AN EMPEROR CUTSCENE DURING THE NEXT REST HELLO????#we had apparently mindblowing life-changing sex and we've talked like. twice since then
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I think the timeless child theory you have makes sense yea! :)
Yayyyyy :3
#i love time travel nonsense i love overwriting your identity as horror i love when you hate something so much and yet create it as the#only possible reality there could be through that fear and loathing of it#ask#like. the master says it’s true. the doctor has NO fucking evidence for it besides fugitive Existing and she should know by now that#sometimes she just! forgets herself! forgets versions of herself or suppresses them!#but maybe this has to be the explanation. and together they’ve rewritten gallifrey’s history to be her own.#neither of them wanted this. but they were both willing to believe it. to hate it so much but not to doubt that it could have happened to#her. like the master Knows the time lords would do this shit to the two of them. to her as they did to him. they put the fucking drums in#his head when he was eight. they rewrote his timeline to torture him for their survival. of course the timeless child would be the doctor.#it is ALWAYS them. its always HER. and now it is!!!!! because he couldn’t fucking resist!!!!! making it about her!!!!!!!!!!! making it about#her and about him and now that’s it! that’s true!#idk i just think the show should be more timeywimey it would be confusing but i dont care i wanna get silly with it
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Everybody learns at their own pace everybody learns in their own time everybody everybody learns at the time best for them everybody-
#.txt#AGONIZING#the desire to improve right.this. second to unattainable degrees is crushing me oh nature cleooo#so many skilled artists and writers to be inspired from and motivated by#I REALIZE its like. all 20-smiths but I just love their stuff so much TT#and look. I still have to do my yearly america cringe post redraw and I’m excited BUT LAST YEAR I literally preferred the previous#and writing again and realizing I might have REGRESSED?!?!? from 2021?!?!? well maybe not BUT#its a tough lesson to learn that just because you age you don’t improve things you associate ur identity with if. you don’t. PRACTICE#like idk#anatomy not good enough#dialogue not good enough#not doing trends means less acknowledgement and that HURTS but I just don’t like making shit idc about it so it doesn’t feel worth it#going to college and realize it ur gonna have to stop being a kid and being ok with inadequacy#loving talking to fandom ppl but thinking oh ill never be as charismatic never be as interesting or as knowledgeable about history and#lighting#PEOPLE SHOULDNT COMPARE THEMSELVES TO THOSE 5+ YEARS OLDER bc DUH they’re gonna often be better#I just. havin a creative bump where it feels like ill never bring my ideas to as good fruitation as others can#well. um. yea if that’s about it. I’m gonna go plan for tomorrows usual week comic cuz I’m flying to England at 5pm and wont have time/bars#ill be in Europe for the next three weeks and I’m very excited#just feeling all around inadequate if cuz Europeans often judge you REALLY harsh when they find out your American#I just need to POWER THOUGH and have a good time and make the comics and write the stories I wanna write#cuz that’s all I can do and the only way to get better at walking is to walk the walk
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ughhhh if only discovering new music could be classed as a professional hobby 😔.
#its one of my faaaave hobbies to indulge in if only i could talk about it and make it sound all professional like 'yeah i have an entire#blog dedicated to sounds i love and like and wish to encapsulate and store in one place that then becomes my happy go to place#and says so much about my personality and what i listen to and the energy it gives me and how discovering new music#has made me listen to so much of different cultures and countries and languages#that i couldnt ever do so before and even within my OWN cultures (indian and pakistani) ive LEARNT SO MUCH!!!#such as how sound changes overtime throughout history but some elements stay the same#how good folk music can be if you just pay attention to it and are willing to give it a try#how the east mix elements of the west into their music but still keep it sounding eastern#but v modern too so that its a relatable listen for a westerner but still firm to its eastern roots#how multilingual songs have become! how much that says about an artist trying to express themselves and their identities!#how stories are told how concepts are explored how religion is used as a way to devote something to someone close to you#how much you learn just by opening up yourself to new music and sounds!!!! how you can build entire playlists around fictional media#and characters based on the songs you hear and how you can make the two things crossover and overlap.#how that enhances your experience of consuming media!!! and makes the song and piece of media even more symbolic to you.'#ughhhhhhhh 😔😔😔😔😔.#faiza talks
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Talking to my dad after listening to Unreal Unearth like
#like i know the reason is that he only ever spoke it in school and never learned it that well to begin with but like. really? not even a few#basic words?#idk ive been reflecting a lot on my cultural identity in the last few years and how my mom made sure to immerse us in her culture as much as#humanly possible and maintain that connection to her home and how it's a much bigger part of my identity than i realized#and on the other hand my dad did none of that and had no real interest in sharing that with us (not intentionally hes just emotionally#unavailable) so there's this whole side of my family and my history that I don't really feel connected to at all#like there have been a few times where someone in my dads family has asked me if i 'feel irish' and they always seem so sad when I have to#be like honestly not really. and its so sad to be basically completely cut off from that entire side of my family and myself especially when#i can compare it to the joy and connection i have in my moms side#like my dad is incapable of talking about a feeling and now all his children and anyone who comes after us will have zero connection to the#country they lived in for generations.#idk i just have some Feelings about this that unreal unearth brought back up#esp butchered tongue#thanks hozier#(seriously thank u 11/10 album)
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reading this blurb made me realise this is possibly the first time ive ever seen my own life experiences shared by another person. damn
#liiike who else up having childhood meningitis leading to moderate-severe deafness thats disabling but also 'not disabling enough'#exasperated by problems with new digital hearing aids GIRL ME TOOOOO we need to get coffee sometime#im reallyyy curious about this book now i wanna give it a go.. ive been meaning to read more abt deafness tbh#its never really bothered me before bc ive never really thought abt it that much. but actually theres very little lit on deafness#and also barely any fiction featuring deaf characters.... plus when it does exist theyre either a) old asf or b) fluent in sign#when actually like. if youre not raised with sign/dont have access to a signing community its very rare to learn it at all#ive met so many ppl irl across the deaf spectrum who cant sign like its WAY more prevalent than youd think#not that signing rep isnt cool!! but i guess no one wants to write deaf characters who cant sign bc then its not 'fun'#bit of a shame that ive never actually seen that massive part of my life + identity reflected in media like. ever lmao.#i mean ive seen more dyke rep than deaf rep.. which is weird thinking abt it bc deafness impacts my life so much more radically#anyway. might see if i can find a copy on abebooks 👀#Hearing Happiness: Deafness Cures in History by Jaipreet Virdi is the book if anyones curious i just saw it on someones reading reclist#.diaries
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sorry, u can't add pics in the replies so i thought this was better! here are some of the book covers he did which i found particularly evocative
some album covers
he's mostly known for the book covers but he also designed the covers of the enciclopedia catalana and some REALLY cool covers for Serra d'Or which is a magazine that promoted pro-catalan and pro-democracy sentiments under franco's regime but which for some reason i can't find anywhere on the internet and i was trying not to take pictures of everything like i usually do in art museums but to enjoy the art so i don't have any of my own lol
this is the only cover i could find online but the ones in the exhibition i remember them being more colorful and with some very daring headlines considering the subject matter and the political situation
this link offers more info about him and his work: https://tempsarts.cat/arts-visuals/jordi-fornas-una-manera-propera-de-representar-el-disseny/
oh my god this is fantastic! thank you so much for going through the trouble!!! i'm really interested now in exactly how his work was shaped by catalan identity and what choices he made that worked towards reviving it. definitely will be reading the article you linked. also genuinely really like the design of the book covers.
#tysm!!!!#its so much fun learning about things trough conversation#almost on accident#i dont know much about catalan history/identity and now my interest is very piqued due to several experiences#also i feel you so hard re: taking picture in musuems....#the desire to experience the work vs the need to archive and look back upon and remember......#yugocars impromptu art club#is how i'll tag these chats i think!#jordi fornas#on the question of art#soon nostalgia will be another name for europe
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what is the true essence of womanhood?
Thinking to oneself “I am a woman” or “I am a girl” (which generally means “young woman”). You can’t always know what other people think, so you ask, and they will tell you.
It’s a simple yet reliable test, doesn’t involve looking at people’s junk, and won’t get you weird looks for asking about people’s junk. A lot of people seem to think it’s socially acceptable to ask strangers about their junk, but I don’t think anyone should be required under any circumstances to disclose the anatomy of their junk (c.f. “hi you don’t know me but how big are your labia”, “your job interview is going great so far, are you cut or uncut”, “we need to check your hymen before soccer tryouts”). I don’t think people should be treated differently based on what their junk looks like. I believe that deliberate misgendering is a juvenile form of bullying more often seen on the playground, for nonathletic boys or girls with unibrows. I don’t think of myself as a bully, so I’m not going to do that. I address people with their choice of title, name, and gender because that’s the polite thing to do and everyone is happier that way. Also, it doesn’t involve looking at people’s junk.
#it’s a dangerous path to celebrate a group defined more by its out-groups than by its in-groups#that’s where we get ‘white pride’#a celebration of a group of people that have no real unifying trait* or history#*skin tone is not a unifying trait because at certain points throughout history it failed to account for the irish italian or latinos#the kind of mentality that says ‘it’s easier to exclude people than to send out invitations’#and if a group celebrates being defined by who they’re NOT… they probably don’t have a lot to say about themselves#trans women are women#because they say so#if you say you’re a woman#then you’re a woman#because you say so#not because I checked your genitals first#also I think you’ll find it much more meaningful to have a functional definition to ‘womanhood’ rather than a structural/physical one#c.f. the ‘is it a chair’/‘is it a sandwich’ debate#if the ‘essence’ isn’t their gender identity then tell me about who they are as a person#there will be a lot more meaning worth celebrating in what they do and how they dress and how they act#than ‘they popped out of a vagina with another one’#seems kinda sad to reduce womanhood to a piece of flesh#that’s something misogynistic incels do
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just realised i can write an essay for this semester on everything everywhere all at once
#they said the case study can be anything (film. theatre. performance. art. exhibition. nonfiction or fiction books. poetry. journal issues.)#shouted YES so hard when i realised im pretty sure its expansive enough for me to probe#so long as its expansive enough to probe at least two of the following: aesthetics. identity. society/culture. space. history. politics#thats what they said#and what can i say. i like writing about things im excited about and those essays get graded best tbh#(much love to contemporary fiction and performance art you are the real mvps for getting me 82s)
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i really want to see genderqueer be an identity we talk about in great detail this pride month. genderqueer saw more usage in the 90s and 2000s, with the rise of the term non binary we've seen more people gravitate toward that label as it becomes the more socially accepted term to use given its notoriety. i would like to bring back alternative labels for this experience, since our diversity is what makes us so unique and strong as a community
genderqueer is an identity that has a long history, and a myriad of definitions and folks who express it in different ways. it really can mean whatever the hell you want. it can mean that you're cisgender but express your gender in a queer way. it can mean that you're trans, take hormones, have gotten top and bottom surgery and dress however you want. it can mean that you dress "normal" and pass as cishet but have a queer gender on the inside. it can mean that you combine masculine and feminine aesthetics. it can mean that you strive for gender neutrality. it can mean that you want to be so ambiguously gendered strangers can't tell who you are.
there's no guidelines or rules, genderqueer is an identity meant to embrace the freedom one can have with gender expression. it can mean as much or as little as the person using it wants it to. it's a beautiful term that is just as flexible as non binary, and i do not postulate to replace that term, but rather bring light to another identity that may suit folks slightly better. it's a beautiful identity. it's what I came out as first in 2011 and I'm happy to be back at all these years later.
2024 is a great year to be proud of being genderqueer and to proudly tell people about this part of yourself. let's celebrate ourselves louder and prouder than ever before. there are many ways to exist outside of the binary, and folks deserve to know about older terms that have been used by the community as well as newer ones
#lgbtqia#lgbtq#lgbt#lgbtqa#queer#trans#transgender#pride 2024#pride month 2024#pride#genderqueer#non binary#nonbinary#transmasc#transmasculine#transfemme#transfeminine#ftm#mtf#trans woman#transfem#trans man#trans men#trans women#trans community#transgender community#enby#our writing#about us#genderqueer lesbian
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#so i have been looking at ancestral practices to add to my collection#(WHITE SUPREMACISTS AND NATIONALISTS THIS POST IS NOT FOR YOU KEEP FUCKING MOVING)#bc my heritage is mostly hungarian and slavic and germanic#i have been peeking into those areas#and everything seems to be leading back to the scythians as far as a practice/cosmology that resonates#but it is so difficult to find untainted info#obvs im not talking about christianity bc it just kind of syncretized its way in#and that’s fine#tho im most comfortable with a practice that is faaaar away from christianity for personal reasons#im talking about like. people made shit up and also white nationalism#ofc because i live in the US my main focus is my region#but i like what im finding and i wish i could find MORE#would scythian practice be closed??? is it weird for me to go so far back in history????#agh this is mostly just the result of me not having anybody to talk to about this IRL so im going insane#ALSO how much of this is closed???#i know there are potentially shamanic practices in some of this and i don’t want to take what’s not mine#even if some of my ancestry is held there i didnt grow up in it and i really do not want to take what i am not welcome to#these are practices that i respect so deeply and i do not want to do them an injustice.#ALSO of course the white american lack of identity leading to people saying ‘oh im x nationality’ when their family is generations removed#there’s a lot going on there that i can’t speak to eloquently#but i know that’s something to consider as well#(my recent ancestors mostly kind of suck so building a practice based on them isnt something i will do#just as an aside to why I’m doing this specific searching so far back)#but the lack of cultural identity (or more the ‘american identity is the default so much that we dont even see it anymore’#and ‘my ancestors squashed their heritage so they could assimilate but were still extremely privileged in many areas so#how do i reclaim that and still acknowledge my struggle is lesser than others’)#so im going insane. again.)#if anybody with perspective wants to chat about this please hmu!!!! i am begging you!!!!!
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