#its a trust thing but DAMN is it gay

[time-woods]

queercosmicentity stuff

[peanutheaddd]

gay as fuck to possess another man tbh

in my head uhhhh this probs happens in the climax . altercation riht before god comes down . grinning so dam huge Guys i hate love being neurodivergent . i feel a little crazy umm ill explain under cut

okay basically petey asks if he can possess dm multiple times throughout the story mostly for selfish reasons LOL

if he possesses dm he not only retains his demonic powers but he also becomes immune to any forms of holy resistance. so like holy water crosses whatever none of that shit works on him . so its like a win win . his demonic powers are also enhancing in nature so wahtever strength the vessel has originally is retained . so obviously dms strength is a perk in this aspect . dm is also a super high tier priest so his holy abilities are Very strong . so basically if he ever possesses dm it would make an almost unstoppable creature .

its like this situation of the more valuable a vessel is the harder it is to possess them . bc a vessel is more valuable the holier they are and holiness is directly correlated to level of resistance against temptation LMFAO .

ive alr implied it above but the only reason petey hasnt been able to possess dm so far is bc the vessel has to be willing . and obvs until this point dm has said no without a moment hesitation LMFAOOO bc he knows petey would get up to tomfoolery and bullshit in his body

BUT another issue is that he has no idea when (if ever) he would get his body back . bc petey can stay in his body as long as he wants essentially. the possession ends whenever petey decides to leave . so if he really wanted to he could just Never leave . and then dms soul would probs wither away over time . so theres this baseline lack of trust thats making it so dm is like no way jose . bc if he lets petey possess him then hes yielding almost 100% of his autonomy essentially .

i reckon theres also a cost to the vessel in some way (physical or spiritual cost idk shrug. maybe the soul gets corrupted or smth) which is also part of the reason dm is against getting possessed .

degradation of the soul is one thing i alr mentioned . so like if the possession lasts for long enough the soul gets eradicated entirely . its not a huge issue tho bc the possession has to last for a While for this to actually happen .

in the initial stages of possession its more like a coexistence of the demon and the vessel . so the vessel is still there and can communicate with the demon . in a way? like their conscience is there ?? and then the vessel just goes more and more quiet as time passes and eventually goes dormant . this is diff from total eradication its just a subconscious yielding of autonomy to the demon .

i think possession also creates like a soul bond of sorts so the demon can possess the vessel whenever they want afterwards without needing permission . this is another reason possession doesnt rlly happen bc someone MIGHT be okay with getting possessed once but theyd be scared of regretting it and being unable to stop any subsequent possessions .

this is ALSO ☝️ yaoiful as hell . there was an anon that asked if they ever get into a relationship and ig this is. kind of smth like that. fellas is it gay to form a soul bond with another man 😭😭😭😭

but anyways during the climax altercation i think the main problem boils down to petey is too weak against the angels and dm is too weak against the demons . and hes like Okay i have to lock in. so he tells petey to possess him and peteys like what the fuck no way bro bc at this point in the story petey actually cares about him and he knows that if he possesses him then dms gonna bear the brunt of the cost . possession incidence 😭😭😭😭😭 and dms like IDGAF LIL BRO LP IS IN DANGER and peteys like damn ur right so BOOMMMM possession and thats what the drawing is LOLLLLLL

[hypertechnica]

i’m going to make fiddauthor art with fidds wearing his wedding ring and you are NOT going to like it

big obligatory banner that says “cheating is bad don’t do it i just like stories with relationship drama”

closeted, internally homophobic gay men who are married with kids has to be the trope i’m weakest to. no person involved is escaping the despair brought on by a relationship built on a well intentioned, desperate lie, born out of a desire to be normal and good

he WANTED to love her so fucking badly. he felt no ill will towards her and he loves their son more than words can say. he thought the attraction, the way she felt about him, would come with time. it didn’t. he doesn’t want to hurt her yet was doomed to from the start, and he’s truly, truly sorry. this does not absolve him of anything whatsoever and she has the full right to never want to speak with him again. he lied! he pretended to feel the same when he never once felt anything but platonic affection! he’s been in love with someone else this whole fucking time! and their kid… he’s caught in the middle of it all, too young to understand why his father would hurt his family like this.

and then he disappears and never comes back. imagine you’re 5 and your dad goes to the middle of the woods with his buddy for science shit, all of the sudden your parents are yelling on the phone and signing papers, and then he goes MIA. for years.

imagine your husbands “buddy” was the one he was thinking of all this time, not you, never you. and the first chance he gets to run away from you, he takes, and you should have been suspicious by the rushed frenzy of it all, the phone calls getting shorter and shorter until it fizzles to nothing. he forgot to get you a christmas gift. he hand-made him two. there has to be something wrong with you, it has to be your fault. you wish you married the man he becomes when he’s in his presence.

he folded when you started questioning him directly - he’d been to neurotic to ever be a good liar. you thought he was the one. he thought you were nice.

by the time the divorce is finalized he’s different in a wrong way. confused, angry, forgetful, insane - if the giant homicidal robot pterodactyl you’ve been harassed by is any indication. (he’s had a bad habit of building homicidal robots when he’s mad since they met -engineer things- but it was never directed at her - thankfully it never actually does anything) he’s clearly abusing drugs - you’d feel bad if he hadn’t abandoned you with the burden of explaining why your son can’t see his father anymore.

it’s a rotten bit of your soul, but time heals you. you move on and no longer think of him. trust in your career. find a man who truly loves you with no motives attached. raise your kid to be a good man. and in a fashion not unlike shakespearean dramatic irony, this makes him move to gravity falls to find and take care of his father. you couldn’t care less what hee doing now, but damn it, it’s his father, what is the kid supposed to do? but its futile- he appears to have no remorse, hell, no memory of the incident in the first place. (this isn’t his fault but how are they supposed to know that?) so he grows bitter and cold just like his mother used to be.

imagine that.

all over a mans inability to do anything but live in denial. to force himself to live in a box and pine like a dying man over the right one at the wrong time, destined to crash and burn. to take denial to a new level- a cult, brain damaging radiation, a total ego death - just to take the edge off. take off that damn wedding ring

[calliesmemes]

YET ANOTHER ROUNDUP OF ASOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF

ASSORTED SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AROUND THE INTERNET, including quotes from Tumblr, Pinterest, TikTok, and X (formerly known as Twitter), for when a muse wants to be a bit silly <333

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

❛ I am not merely a clown; I’m the entire damn circus! ❜

❛ I will bite you if you continue this behavior. ❜

❛ Being a dramatic ass bitch isn’t a personality trait; it’s a lifestyle! ❜

❛ Trauma? Oh … you mean, my lore? ❜

❛ why must I cite sources? is it not enough to just say ‘trust me, bro’? ❜

❛ sorry for being a perfect sweetie and a genius it will likely happen again. ❜

❛ forget about touching grass; I need to touch WATER I NEED TO GO INTO THE OCEAN I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!! ❜

❛ I’m attracted to men with muppet energy and no i will not be explaining. ❜

❛ you want me to make friends with people? the thing that killed julius caesar? ❜

❛ what’s your birthstone? mine is rock bottom. ❜

❛ I absolutely hate that I’m not bioluminescent. Pathetic. ❜

❛ ohhhhh my god i have got to stop mourning the past or whatever. ❜

❛ you expect me to act like a normal human being? I’m wearing a turtleneck! ❜

❛ i don’t struggle with same sex attraction I’m actually very good at it. ❜

❛ unfortunately i often find out without even getting the chance to fuck around. ❜

❛ I’m bisexual which means that I’m attracted to anybody who can defeat me in physical combat. ❜

❛ all anyone needs to know about me is that i’m a dumbass and i love women. ❜

❛ sorry but philosophers aren’t impressive i came up with stuff like that when i was 12. ❜

❛ I pay my own bills; I can cuss all I want! ❜

❛ I don’t have rizz; I have sad eyes and a weird presence. ❜

❛ my demons are chasing me and they’re doing the Naruto run. ❜

❛ honey we are ALL doomed by the narrative. it's not that serious. have some fun with it. ❜

❛ dating me is like interviewing a psych ward patient. ❜

❛ being a girl with very large brown eyes comes with great responsibility. ❜

❛ i’m autistic in ways that you can’t even begin to imagine. ❜

❛ being a loser may be a phase to you but its a lifestyle for me. ❜

❛ entering a magical portal in the woods would fix me. ❜

❛ I’m lonely but not in a hot mysterious way; more like in a pathetic way. ❜

❛ life is so unserious just say womp womp and move on! ❜

❛ you’re vibing? In this economy? ❜

❛ just because I’m small doesn’t mean I can’t kick your ass. ❜

❛ my primary motivators are fear, spite, and aesthetic longing. ❜

❛ sorry about the chaos; I needed attention. ❜

❛ WHAT IS UP GIRL you look foreboding and malicious! ❜

❛ baby i can be your problematic bi wife. ❜

❛ i don’t think any of you understand how important i am to the plot. ❜

❛ what if we are both red flags? what then? ❜

❛ any dream can be a prophetic dream if you’re willing to do some really weird shit. ❜

❛ my hobbies include being right, being gay, and being a hater. ❜

❛ i have a phd in Loving The Color Pink And Also Glitter. ❜

❛ being a menace to society is a full time job and I am dedicated. ❜

❛ my life has been a bouquet of oopsie daisies. ❜

❛ i survive on spite, anxiety, and blasphemy. ❜

❛ if you’re not obsessed with me, why would I wanna be with you? ❜

❛ the hottest thing a man can be is a little afraid of me. ❜

❛ my love language is being a hater. ❜

❛ i don’t get enough credit for acting far less insane than i actually am. ❜

❛ the A in my name stands for always right. ❜

❛ Jesus is my homeboy but God has a lot to answer for and I will continue to be rebellious until he does so. ❜

❛ I’ll see a man with long hair and then remember that I’m not above temptations of the flesh. ❜

❛ i’m going to be honest with you I’m not going to be honest with you. ❜

❛ stop asking me if I’m ok I’ll literally make out with you. ❜

❛ part of my masculine charm is that I’m literally insane. ❜

❛ are you sure those are demons bro? or are they consequences from the choices you made? ❜

❛ i do not identify as a boy or a girl. i identify as a nuisance, an irritant, a fool, and a problem. ❜

❛ praying on someone’s downfall isn’t enough i need to participate in it. ❜

❛ we all need to chill. i won’t do it first but it’s something i noticed. ❜

❛ not to sound like a Victorian woman suffering from hysteria but going to the sea would fix me. ❜

❛ the silly goose convention called; they asked if you could be their keynote speaker. ❜

❛ i deserve unrestricted access to old castles and old churches i want to know all the secrets. ❜

❛ doesn’t matter if you’re cringe or based we’re all just here to suffer. ❜

❛ I’m no longer comedic relief I’m now serious panic. ❜

❛ this is getting difficult to romanticize. ❜

❛ done healing my inner child. next up is my inner teen. her highness needs a sword. ❜

❛ i am God’s silliest experiment. ❜

❛ i’m very vulnerable right now if anyone wants to take advantage of me. ❜

❛ sorry i overshared do you still think im hot? ❜

❛ I can yap for days and still maintain my air of mystery. ❜

❛ good luck sending me mixed signals; I don’t even understand normal ones. ❜

❛ not all of your life decisions have to be smart. some can be purely for cinematic value. ❜

[laplumasucia]

ravi headcanon time

- i’m a pansexual ravi truth

- ravi comes from a wealthy family (they could afford his hospital bills AND this man owns rental properties in Cali? thats generational wealth bby)

- ravi has 2+ siblings (buck’s not the first to yap at him, okay?)

- he has a good relationship with his parents (funny, relaxed father + stricter mum. he secretly loves her concern and advice and pestering)

- bobby tries to adopt him like buck (and eddie) and he’s like “hey cap, you’re a great guy and ily, but you kinda act like my dad” and bobby is like ???? bc he IS his dad and ravi brings up his bio father and how close they are and bobby can’t believe someone in the 118 actually has good parents. like wdym you are happy to go see your whole family ?????????

- ravi has a nonbinary partner. the 118 thinks he is poly bc he keeps saying “they” and shows photos of what seems like at least two people (a masc person and a femme one) but one day the team meets ravi’s person and ask abt the “others” uhhhhm no that’s a single genderfuck i fear

- ravi genuinely thought buck and eddie were together when he met them and he can’t figure out wtf their relationship is. divorced? and remarried? friends to lovers? idiot4idiot? queerplatonic?

- ravi doesn’t mind buck talking abt eddie its that just ravi is done with how little sense it all makes “so he went to texas with our son” “damn another divorce?” “no his wife died, they didn’t divorce” ??? “anyway, he’s the best father in the world” “go back his wife???” “yeah, she was killed in an accident years ago. remember that random lady he cheated with? they looked identical” “he cheated on you with his dead wife’s doppelgänger??!??” “no he cheated on his gf” “HE HAS A GF?!?” “well not anymore” like how can ravi make this make sense

- hen and ravi are secretly besties bc they both detect Bullshit everywhere.

- chimney gaslights ravi over everything. absolute bold faced lies. it makes understanding the 118 even harder.

- ravi didn’t know maddy was buck’s sister for years so now he doesn’t know if its gaslighting or true

- ravi and his partner have a cat who is their child. ravi loves that thing. his princess. they found it at a shelter and it was so fluffy and round. perfect.

- ravi has book smarts more than street smarts but doesn’t know it. can recall maths and literature from school but he will see his buddies going through ptsd and be like “weekly crash outs am i right?” then high fives them

- he texts all lowercase with ironic emojis and it confuses everyone but eddie who was a twitter girlie and has a son. buck pretends he understands but doesn’t

- chim and ravi love to match esp with sunglasses. even though chim gaslights ravi, that’s his little buddy. that’s his guy.

- ravi sends texts to the 118 family minus buddie abt buddie and they give neutral group reactions then all dm each other going crazy. the one person who remembers to dm ravi is karen.

- ravi babysits chris and denny once and is immediately initiated into a trio. like chris + buddie is family. henren + denny too. chris and denny are a cute duo. but The Trio. the boys are BACK. chris and denny have a chill new friend with a car, a steady income, and every video game ever. like yes game nights with mums/dads are epic but ravi doesn’t know not to let them say fuck.

-ravi is a little cutie pie princess. like yes he’s a big strong man but he is a sweatheart. not quite a himbo but definitely has his dumb blond moments. like yeah he will volunteer for terrorism bc those are his emotional support unhinged gay coworkers.

- ravi is a bobby lives truther. obviously bobby IS alive in my fanon but like ravi never believed he died he was like nah nah you guys are trusting the GOVERNMENT. not on my watch.

- going back to the lack of street smarts, sometimes he forgets his filter and will just speak his mind. he’s smart and perceptive so its usually accurate but he will spill devastating truths. he sees eddie back in LA and goes “thank god you’re here. buck rlly needs some dick” and eddie is like ??????? then maddie has the baby and ravi is like “thank god bobby didn’t die bc that baby is not a robert…. so what’s his name?” “kevin” “maybe robert isn’t such a bad idea”

okay that’s what i can think of for now. lmk your headcanons. obviously i’m right but like are YOU?

[sanji-piss-hell]

ZOSAN FIC REC

Here is some of my fave zosan fics. Some of these I read years ago and so I don't fully remember what theyre about but they we're good enough that I still have strong emotional attachments when I see the name. Most of them are things I've read recently. Literally all I do all day is homework and have an app tts fanfics to me like an audio book so there's quite a few of recs here. I am not the best at summeries but just trust me bro these are GOOD SHIT. I only provide the best. What I consider a good fic: - Takes place in the one piece world (I don't like modern aus) - Characters stay in character or if they do have changes from their canon portrayal there is a justifiable reason from within the story. - Solid story telling and arcs (even the shorter fics) - The Zosan dynamic is kept mostly how it is in canon they fight and bicker. (I know some like when they're soft with eachother like a loving married couple. You won't find much of that here) - Some of these have pervy sanji, que nose bleeds and ogling. With that out of the way here's the list!! Now to my fave zosan fic of all time and ironically enough the only fic taking place in a modern setting: Life is fine series. TW: Drug abuse, heavy angst, depression I have reread this twice and forced a friend to read it too. It is so amazing not just for the zosan but for the genuinely good story telling. You follow zoro reeling from his sudden loss of relationship with Sanji and falling down a...Well uh, path. It's fucked it's dark it's depressing and its fucking riviting. Alot of the time reading this you're just like WHY DID SANJI LEAVE HIM WHAT IS GOING ON??? Honestly I need to reread this again. Onto softer fics to heal your heart after that one: Honor in limits, his strengths in weakness By Hawksbrood

“Fucking hell cook, what happened to you?” Zoro demanded, voice low so as not to disturb the others sleeping nearby.

Sanji rolled his eyes. “What do you think? I told you we got in a fight earlier.”

“Not that, your fucking feet!”

The cook snarled at that, crushing his cigarette in his teeth. “What the fuck do you mean, my feet? They’re just feet!”

Zoro’s eyes widened, looking at the bruised flesh before him. This wasn’t that.

This was just so good and cute. I appreciate watching zoro appreciate sanji. They take care of eachother but in a way where theyre both still them yeah know? I appreciate how sanji is written letting himself be vulnerable but understanding that he's always gonna be crass cause it's just a part of who he is.

come on, come on (turn a little faster) by donutsandcoffee

The one where everyone thinks they’re dating, Sanji is oblivious, and Zoro takes everything in stride.

Sometimes a love story can go in reverse.

I reread this one recently and it's just soft and sweet. I like watching sanji flounder around. The gay panic is great.

a complete guide to falling in love by ThousandSunny Sanji was trained in the Bridal Arts; this does not go unnoticed by the rest of his crew. I read this like 3 years ago and I dont remember much but I do remember loving it!

Part Timer By 8ball Sanji really, really doesn't want to give Zoro a job at his restaurant. Zoro doesn't really even want to work there in the first place, but, well, there’s this thing with Sanji, and this thing with feelings and the whole thing is pretty damn stupid all together. Zeff just wants grandkids. He’s too old for this bullshit anyways. I am sure everyone knows 8ball very well they're like zosan famous but still just in case this one is really fucking good. Also read this 3 years ago so I don't remember much but I consider this a zosan classic. Onto the rated R Grand Buffet by asyndese Drunk fic!! If there was one thing Zoro knew, it was that you could always trust Sanji's inclinations to do a beautiful 180 as soon as he was drunk. Luckily, Zoro was more than equipped to handle it. I spent. 30 minutes. Trying to find this fic again because that's how much I loved it. It altered my brain chemistry. Sanji getting a nose job during sex is just. aaaaaaaaa. Read it. Cannot suggest enough. Horrors not yet known by Trixree

Sanji doesn’t know how he didn’t notice it before, is the thing. Of all the times he has seen Zoro shirtless (in battle, mostly) he just… never noticed. The problem is, once he has noticed, Sanji can’t seem to stop noticing. And neither can anyone else.

In which Zoro has a nipple piercing and Sanji has a Problem.

I recently reread this and the first time I read it I didn't really get the whole gender sanji shit. Now though???? Yeah another fic that rewired my brain chemistry. This fic opened doors for me it exposed me to a new world. Also sanji gay panic is in here and I live for that. It can be pretty raunchy (love that too) Three rounds with a tiger by KobochaKitsune Another drunk Fic!! also in modern times damn maybe I lied sdklfj

Liquid courage, drunken decisions, terrible euphemisms, and texts from last night, or: how to think entirely with the booze (and your dick) for once.

Or: By the time Sanji got to the party, everyone was already drunk.

I read this 3 years ago (theres a trend going on can you tell??) It also rewired my brain chemistry (from this point on just assume all of these nsfw fics rewired my brain chemistry each of these opened doors for me. This one opened the doors to bottom zoro.) Fucking 20k words of just pwp. I dont even know how the author did that bro like damn. Nature of things by stark_black Tw: Sex work and prostitutes When the Sunny docks, Sanji and Zoro sometimes seek out relief in some not so savory places. After crossing paths in town on more than one occasion, the two find they have a lot more in common than they would like to admit. I hunted this down for like fucking hours a couple of weeks ago because it was that good. Stark_Black has a fucking library worth of zosan fics this one is a classic to me. But if you want more content check out his other fics I think they have like over 100 zosan its kinda insane. Coregasm by Yakarmi

Sanji discovers that sometimes, Zoro has orgasms while he lifts.

-----

“You…” Sanji trailed off, gaze turning down as he licked his lips. Pink tongue darting out nervously. “You orgasm when you exercise?”

Zoro clenched his jaw. Shrugged. Trying to act nonchalant.

“Sometimes.”

Sanji’s eye went wide, and like his mouth had suddenly been liberated from his brain, blurted out, “that’s so fucking hot,” before clamping his hands over his mouth. His cigarette fell from his mouth, bouncing soundlessly on the ground.

Bro bestie, the way this put me on nose bleed Sanji. Perv sanji. I need that gif thats like mmm cause man this is good. Ending this fic rec with a BANG we have

Contingencies and Congruencies by PeaceSignDisasterBi

Somewhere between finishing the bottles of alcohol and mugs of beer, the crew comes together to create a contingency plan for something that may-or-may-not-happen during their time on the Grand Line and beyond. Usopp thinks it's more likely than bumping into zombies, Zoro wants to stay out of this, Sanji is just going with the flow, and Nami may or may not keep things legally binding and above board with consistent consensual acquiescence. Robin finds it all amusing.

The damn chart stays in the locked drawer in her desk, split into three neat categories: Devil Fruit Powers, Science, and Magic. Each represents whatever they're hit with but also categorizes the amount of self-control the person has during.

AKA: 5 times Zoro and Sanji had to help each other as Consensual Helpers of Dubious Consent + 1 Time There Was Nothing Dubious At All

Ok this is 152k long its pretty insane. It regoes over the arcs so throughly so carefully that I literally had to question my memory because I havent experienced alot of these arcs in a while (it's one of the reasons im rewatching one piece). I will say despite how amazing and well written this is I had a hard time comprehending sometimes. now I was sick at the time of reading this so that might be why but sometimes the way things were phrased felt like yoda talking. I think it's just me though. I'm not used to big words :( And thats a wrap!! These arent even all the ones I wanted to include I have at least 20 more off the top of my head but I'll save that for another day. I hope you find joy in these fics Like i did I'll def do another one of these as cause I didnt even touch my sanji centric fics or germa 66 or just in general the best sanji fanfic writers. (Mentioned some of them like 8ball, thousand sunny and donuts and coffee.) Best of luck to yall and let me know what you think!

[yaoireview]

hi Mr yaoi! Big fan here! review Chester and Parker from luxury pranks.

Thanks for being a fan i guess..

🤮....

PARKSTER YAOI REVIEW

(DISCLAIMER: This is about the CHARACTERS they play in these videos. Chester and parker the IDEAS, NOT the people.)

Chester and Parker.. the best creature ghost insect hunters on the west side.. but some might not realize that when they're not hunting ghosts.. they're hunting each other... romantically i mean..

Before I give my two senses.. I'm gonna throw out some evidence of their homosexuality, in case you all were busy pissing your pants about the monsters to realize

EVIDENCE 1: HES SEEN THEM SHARING THAT BED

Look.. I GET IT.. the words that chad used to describe women were frankly.. DISGUSTING.. but he was gonna have a bitch over, which is something that parker nor chester would ever.

The episode with chad is one of the few that recognize the ongoing sharing of the bed between the two. Chad calls the two out saying.. and i quote..

"you guys are gay... GAY!! GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY!!"- Chad

Some may say that its just because there's only ONE bed available.. and if you say that you're STUPID. DUMB EVEN. When there has been two beds, chester has went OUT of his way to FIX IT and so he could share a bed with parker. If you don't believe in gay people.. you'll believe after you see THESE..:

When the two had personal beds, chester said "damn.. its just not the same.. do you think we could push them together??" and parker replied, "dude... no...". Chester went on to do it anyways.

another situation of there being two beds and chester not being happy about it was when he CLAIMED that the bed was absolutely SOAKED with piss. Honestly im kind of convinced by how he said it.. sounded very genuine but.. i dont see any pee.. parker went on to say he wouldn't share the bed with chester but OH LOOK WHO GOT HIS WAY

i know what you're saying... "sharing a bed between friends is normal" well this is just the beginning..

EVIDENCE 2: INTERACTIONS WITH WOMEN

the look parker gives chester after he talks to a woman

Even though it seems that most of the time parker is just trying to get with the women he's trying to save, he's oddly pretty disgusted a good amount of the time that chester is messaging this girl. i mean COME ON in this one it looks like hes gonna cry

parker is absolutely NOT on the idea of chester getting a girlfriend and hes even more mad when he finds out that chester was using HIS PHOTOS for the dating app.. also why did chester use a photo of parker sleeping in that one kinda... odd if you ask me..

but then its revealed that for SOME reason chester is trying to get parker with this girl and so he drops their home address in their text messages, as you do. When parker sees this girl in REAL LIFE he does actually seem interested. he looks joyous..

but then when the girl actually wants to SPEND TIME WITH PARKER... ALONE... just them... without... chester.. he panicks. It makes it seem like that chester thought the girlfriend would just be for the video and nothing else. When he realizes that its just not for the 20 minute video and parker actually CARES for this girl.. he is distraught

Chester gets so jealous of the fact that he invades the womans purse which IS A CRIME. Chester finds IDS of other men shes been with and rushes upstairs to tell parker. When he sees them sitting together he acts confused and he asks why parker would ever do such a thing. After parker asks why Chester committed a crime, he locks him OUT of the room.. The entire video chester keeps on saying "this girl is TROUBLE PARKER!! shes SUSPICIOUS!!" even before he found any evidence to think that of her.

Chester then went on to stick his camera under the door frame under the bathroom because.. as we know he does NOT TRUST this girl

Parker is reasonably upset at this and calls chester out for being a SICK FREAK, and he asks chester why he doesnt want him to be happy with this girl, to which chester spits and sputters, since he never thought he came off that way

main point of the video chester is jealous and saying that this woman REEKS and SUCKS, which i feel like if the woman WASNT a monster he would've been locked up after this episode.

another episode with the same gimmick but the woman is into chester goes about how you think it would. Chester is extremely uncomfortable. Its like the exact opposite, where parker and the girl hits it off in the first one with chester uncomfortable, to where the girl is kind of insulting chester and chester isn't into it and parkers trying to be a wingman until he's freaked out by her

She may be insulting chester but.. atleast shes impressed by the chairs thats all you really need in a significant other

Chester is also really obsessed with her taking off her shoes in the house because he doesnt want her to bring MUD into his home or something

The entire time shes just using chester and she took chester's car keys and just DROVE OFF, and then when she wakes up and just starts BREAKING PLATES IN THEIR HOME. The two seem to get more scared than any other monster they've had to put up with and the thing is.. SHES NOT A MONSTER.. SHES JUST SOMEONE THAT CAME INTO THEIR HOME, BORROWED THEIR CAR AND BROKE THEIR FINE CHINA... unforgivable..

Main point of this section.. I'm pretty sure chester doesnt like girls..

EVIDENCE 3: THE CLONE

Alright.. I dont even need to ask i KNOW that you're convinced that chester loves parker.. but the other way around...? Well.. I think I got just the thing..

The second clone episode of Luxury Dark.. lets just say.. it was very eye opening,,

This isnt the main point of this section but at the beginning chester DOES throw out the idea that they should make the clone a child of the two of them, to which parker shoots down

When they finally decide on The Perfect Clone, the description states that the clone is not needed to be teached and that "it will already behave like you"

When they get this clone, it CANT STOP gassing chester up and saying everything that chester wants to hear.

Now you may just think "Well the clone is just manipulating him.." WRONGO ROUND EYES. I believe that the clone is just openly saying parker's inner feelings about chester.. You may think its a stretch.. but you wont after this NEVER BEFORE SEEN CUT DIALOGUE.

Got nothing more to say, do you? Thats what i thought.. don't doubt me..

CONCLUSION:

Maybe the scariest monster were the umm were the... uhh... i'm not sure.. YAOI: 9/10

[cryingat300kph]

Pretty Thing

Pairing: Sebastian Vettel x Boytoy!Mechanic!Reader

(Bad) Summary: When Ferrari gets a new pretty boy for a mechanic a certain 4x world champion takes notice.

Rating: M Warning(s): Mentions of sex, but no actual sex. Cursing. Use of Y/N. Allusion to homophobia in sports. F slur (but in a self-descriptive and reclaimed way) -Not Proofread-

Length: 1.4K Words

A/N: This is Seb in his chaotic flirt Ferrari era, like 1st/2nd year at Ferrari vibes. Also the ending is kinda cut off because I lost steam, but wanted to put something out. Let me know if ya’ll want this continued, I have ideas ;) <3

“Lewis look, that’s who I was talking about.” Seb says poking Lewis’s arm gesturing towards the bar. “Him?!” Lewis asks turning back to Seb. “Yeah.” Seb suppresses the urge to add Isn’t he pretty? “Damn I'm surprised they would hire a mechanic so-“ “so gay?” Sebastian supplies. “Heh-Yeah.” “Well he usually doesn’t look like that.” Seb says again gesturing towards the man.

The “that” Seb is referring to is the absolute twink uniform you are wearing. You might as well be wearing a flashing sign reading “I like dick! ;)” And Sebastian thinks you look completely and utterly delectable; more than usual.

He’d had his eyes on you since you joined the team at the top of the year. At first he noticed you because were young for someone not on the PR team, and far too handsome to not be in a more front-facing role. He was glad he was known to make sure to get to know all new members of the Ferrari family, because it meant he could satisfy this curiosity; finding out you had climbed the ladder at the factory quickly and had always wanted nothing more than to be in the garage track-side.

His interest in you only grew as he got to know you better. He knew obviously that as a mechanic you weren’t just a pretty face, but he soon found out you weren’t just either of those things. But someone who was extremely funny, kind and just as much of a nerd about racing as he was.

And so, a friendship slightly-beyond coworkers started to form. Now, at halfway through the season you two could be called proper friends, but your friendship is still very tied to work. Either way, you feel comfortable around Seb, comfortable enough to speak freely of your interests and life outside of racing. However, one thing he doesn’t know about you was that you don’t mind sharing a bed with a man.

Its hard being queer in formula one. It’s 2015 and huge strides have been made, but motorsports lags behind. Especially as someone who is involved in a more “masculine” job at Ferrari you keeps your more flamboyant tendencies under wraps. European ideas of masculinity help a lot, but it’s still a bit lonely, stressful and draining, to be closeted.

Hence why you’re here.

It had been a stressful race weekend, but Seb ultimately got podium and everyone was rightfully really happy and the team planned to go for drinks with the winning Mercedes team.

Seb had protested a bit when you said you thought you’d sit this one out. “I would, trust me, but I’ve had this headache all day and I doubt a hangover will make it any better.” You lied. He had seemed to come back to himself, like his earlier protest was a slip. Laughing it off. “You’re right, go, rest. We need your brain intact!”

You had chuckled at that saying bye to him and driving back to the hotel to get changed before heading out for your real plans. You felt bad lying to Seb but after this weekend a guy needed some attention damn it! But most importantly you wanted to dress how you want and exist how you want for once even just for a couple of hours.

---

Without you at the party Sebastian is more melancholy than usual. He's cursing himself for crushing like a teenager, but without you there he’s lost interest. “Dude is this about the guy you told me about.” Lewis asks seeing Seb is obviously down about something. “what? no- it” “Where is he? Go talk to him!" “He’s not here, had a headache so he stayed back.” “Well you don’t seem to be having fun so go after him, just ask to hang out.” “But the team, i should-.” “Kimi is enough of a party for the team, he’d probably enjoy the company.” Lewis nudges him. “You know why I can’t Lewis.” Seb says seriously. “Yeah.” Lewis agrees and they’re silent for a bit before he speaks up again, mischief in his voice. “But maybe we could find some other entertainment for the night. To quell the ache?” “What are you suggesting?” Seb asks suspicious. “There’s a bar a couple blocks from here. Heard its a discreet spot, good for cruising.” He says like he’s stating the weather and not suggesting the two biggest F1 drivers at the moment go cruising for gay sex.“What if someone sees us.” “we’re in America, no one knows who we are.” And Seb is just tipsy enough, and yearning to fuck a stranger and imagine it’s you, so he agrees.

“Let’s do it!”

---

And so, Sebastian now finds himself at a loss for words, staring at you. At you, sipping a cocktail, half sitting on a bar stool, your back slightly arched. Honestly the picture is so inviting. Lewis is just looking at him with a smirk.

Sebastian sees that a couple men obviously have their eyes on you too. He watches as the bartender hands you a drink gesturing to one of the said men. You look over and the man starts to get up. Seb feels his fists tighten, but he relaxes when you hand the drink back to the bartender looking at the man apologetically. He’s glad the man gets the idea and sits back down, Seb doesn’t want to think what he would have done if the man had persisted.

Wait, so maybe you’re just out for a nice night alone, he doesn’t want to disturb that. But dressed like that? He’s having a hard time resisting.

“Lewis what do I do?” He asks. “The flirt is asking me?“ Lewis scoffs, but when Seb just looks at him annoyed, he Chuckles; he’s never seen the confident man so nervous before. “Just, go get him tiger.”

He knows it’s now or never, so Sebastian goes to the opposite end of the bar and tells the bartender to get you a drink.

-- The bartender hands you another drink. It’s top shelf which catches your eye. A couple men have bought you shots and stuff throughout the night but so far when the bartender pointed to who they all weren’t your type. Or they quickly stopped being your type the moment they opened their mouths.

When you ask who, this time, the bartender cocks his head to the end of the bar. You look over and it’s Sebastian! Your eyes go wide, unsure of what to do. What is he doing here?! Here, where you are looking like a complete faggot and nothing like you do at work. But he’s your friend right, he would’ve found out eventually and he just bought you a drink?

You tamp down the flicker of hope that tries to spark. So you just smile and raise the drink to him raising your eyebrows. It’s friendly coworker shit right? He’s just being nice. Your brain is forced to stop working overtime when he approaches you and starts speaking.

“I could barely recognize you y/n!” He says smiling and friendly, but with a hint of something? And he is blatantly looking you up and down. Tongue between his teeth. Oh. You can’t help lighting up despite being nervous. “Well let’s just say the Ferrari uniform is not my personal style.” You joke. “This definitely suits you much better.” He blatantly flirts, which catches you bit off guard, but you try not to show it, excitement now replacing your nerves. “You think the boss will let me wear a crop top to work?” “Maybe I could ask him nicely.” Sebastian says and then leans closer.

“Having something so pretty in my garage can only bring me good luck right?” “Oh, I don’t think you need luck, Seb.” You laugh because now you are definitely blushing.

“Every driver needs luck.” He says low.

The way he's looking at you. It’s almost too much. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted. In the span of a few minutes you’ve basically come out to a coworker turned friend, but also discovered that apparently Sebastian Vettel, Ferrari driver, four time world champion also likes men. And now said Ferrari driver and friend is flirting with you.

You can't wait to see where the night goes.

[kayyrandomposts]

(here are my Marcus Flint Headcanons,sorry if you all dont like it😭 hope you all like it)

1)

Hes russian,i dont know why but he just gives me russian vibes so i'll probabily do him russian in every post,i'll use google translator to translate the russian things he'll say so dont hate on me if the translate is wrong😭

2)

Hes a bottom (or maybe a switch) he just doesnt gives me a "top" vibe,everyone do him a top in every story,dont get me wrong,i love the stories but cmon,lets normalize Flint being a bottom,please,i'll probabily make him mostly a bottom in my posts so yeahh.

3)

Hes DEADLY afraid of all types of insects (like me). He just cant stand looking at them even tho he will NOT admit this fear (everyone knows it bc he makes it dead obvious),everytime he'll see an insect,this boy will scream and probabily hide behind whoever is near him for protection (its kinda funny now that i think abt it)

4)

This boy KNOWS how to cook,and knows it very well,i know he does knows it,thats all i have to say.

5)

Hes gay. His guy is the most homosexual boy on earth,even if he fucks and makes out with multiple girls,hes HOMOSEXUAL,he just does it w girls because hes probabily bored😭.

6)

Hes afraid of dentists. No need for an explaination.

7)

He likes books even tho he hates studying,his favourite books are probabily horror ones or dark romance ones.

8)

His favourite colors are dark green and black,even if he'll never admit it,he likes purple too.

9)

His favourite animals are snakes and cats,he has a pet snake in his house,his parents told him multiple times he couldnt have it but they gave up and gave him a pet snake for his 14th birthday,its a girl and her name its probabily Cherri.

10)

WALKING RED FLAG but when you get to know him and he opens up to you,he'll be a sweetheart (and probabily threaten you if you tell it to anyone)

11)

DADDY ISSUES. ABSOLUTELY MASSIVE DADDY ISSUES. His mother left his father for another man and since Marcus is IDENTICAL to his mother,his father hates him for looking so much like her.

12)

MASSIVE trust issues,this man wont open up to you so easily,it could take days,months or even a whole year for him to open up to you.

13)

His favourite foods are sandwiches,he cares about his health so he always eat sandwiches.

14)

He has scars all over his body,from fightes or quidditch practices or matches probabily left by bludgers.

15)

He has sleepy eyes and   has a DAMN SCARY death glare.

16)

He has earrings,he got them at 12 and always wears the damn same (black pearls) even if he has a collection of ALL BLACK earrings (and wears a lot of black rings,bracalets and necklaces too).

17)

His wardrobe is ALL BLACK even tho the only colored hoodies he has are from either Adrian Pucey or from Terence Higgs.

18)

He hates Snape and professor Sprout because Snape is too strict and he hates Sprout only because he hates herbology.

19)

His favourite subjects are flying lessons (of course.) And Defense Against Dark Arts.

20)

(LAST ONE FOR NOW.)

He (Strangely) LOVES stuffed animals,he has a snake stuffed animal (From Adrian) hidden in his room so no one can find it (his whole team knows it.) He probabily even sleeps with his snake stuffed animal.

(ALRIGHT THATS IT FOR NOW,IK ITS BAD SORRY,TELL ME IF YOU LIKE IT AND GIVE ME MORE IDEAS FOR OTHER HEADCANONS AND TELL ME MORE CHARACTERS TO DO,BYEE)

[johnegbertlover413]

Alotta peoole, especially June fans, act like homestuck is ABOUT queer people, NO. ITS NOT. It never was and it was never planned to be.

Homestuck STRICTLY and obviously about ISOLATION. It’s litterly in the god damn TITLE. And of course u can be isolated because of gay but most of the characters aren’t honestly. Saving John for last,

Rose matured quickly but superficially so she doesn’t trust anyone

Dave is a horrible person so no one wants to be around him

Jane suffers constant assassination attempts to the point she can’t leave the house and falls back into Crocker corp as something safe, ending uo very skeptical (doesn’t help that Roxy, Crocker corp hater, is one of them seriously wtf)

I don’t think I need to explain the other kids

Karkats a mutant and can’t let anyone know

Kanaya is the antithesis to troll culture

Aradia fucking died and lost all feeling then was physically separated by a metal robot

Vriska has spider mom and other influences that cause her to ruin allll her relationships

Terezi has her attachment to vriska messing with her other relationships

I don’t feel like doing all of it but Even characters that don’t matter as much to the overall story have the same fuckung themeeee

Feferi has to constantly hide as to not be culled by condy to not take tha thrown

Eridan gets no hoes

I brought up June earlier because NONE OF HER “““““FANS”””””” UNDERSTAND THE SOURCE OF HER LONENES. They make it about her being transsss uwu which isn’t in the text at alllll and never will be no matter how you read into a one off line of dialogue.

It feels like they are doing it JUST to give John truama uwu because they can’t understand what makes characters sympathetic without it. Not even with out it just without them constantly whining about how much they suffer soooo much. They need to act like dad Egbert was some evil patriarcy man who forced june into a MAN NO EMOTION NO FEELING role (despite the fact he constantly pours his heart out about how much he loves John). At best theyll portray “June” as just going after her father’s role because she’s grieving and dysphoria and uhm blah blah blah or something which also is insanely retarded because it’s a straight forward lie.

But anyway it’s all ignoring the fact that JOHN EGBERT IS THE MOST AUTISTIC CHARACTER IN EXISTENCE.

I swear hussie himself could have put fucking books on autism in dads study, transcribe the whole thing, specifically specify Taht they are to Better understand John n bitches would be like “ooooooh he’s ignoring his child’s obvious gender dysphoria and blaming it on AUTISM. Classic abusive parent smh”

Lemme list out every single autistic traits n experiences show in my beatiful goddess princess Johnathan Egbert. I love lists

-he has big explosive reactions to things deemed as trivial by other characters but matter so much to him (Betty Crocker, how he thinks about his father blah blah) also referred to as tantrums by other characters despite technically not fitting the criteria and fitting in much more with melt downs (like he doesn’t liek Betty Crocker so he freaks out when a food he likes IS BETTY CROCKER)

-his reactions to more major events are much more low-key . His dad’s a business man? Curled up on the bed horrified. Dads dead? Oh no. He’s still very sad he just lashes out in other ways, the whole ship melt down n avoiding processing it by focusing on his special interests(like how he started to hate con air)

-he very clearly has special interests as mentioned last point. He rants to Kanaya (my favorite page) and meenah about Mathew McConaughey and paranormal lore respectively Not really caring/ noticing that neither of them give a fuck.

-he is really gullible like he’ll go along with what rose says and with what terezi says 1 to 1 because he doesn’t really think like that. The most obvious answer is vriska, she was 100% using him against terezi but he doesn’t really understand that EVER even when he realizes that she’s crazy he doesn’t realize that vriska was toatluu using him. Not to say vriska doesnt likeeee john ever but they basically fuckung say that their realatiojship started out as daverezi envy.

-he is the most uo front of all the kids. Not THAT Crazy for general people but he doesn’t really hide any of his emotions beyond just not being able to process them and compared to litterly every other character it’s noteable

Before yoh freaks say it I’m not saying June can’t exist because John’s autistic. YOU are just applying johns very fucking obvious traits to transness that both makes those traits miserable (his special interests and bluntness being covers or whatever) and erases johns ore existing character

Nothing wrong with having a non cannon head cannon you don’t have to make it retroactively cannon! Stop eith the delusions !!!

[fallenhunnyapple]

So the Poll said you guys were interested in the Human Priest!Adam AU which was a bit of a surprise honestly. But I'm very happy to talk about it~

I shared this art before for the AU. I gave a very basic description at the time, so let me get more detailed about it!

It hasn't gone unnoticed that Adam has gotten... Rather vice-ful in Heaven. One might even say sinful. And as such a public figure, that's no good. So they come up with a plan. Reincarnate Adam as a Human and let him live out a life and Prove that he's worthy of his place in Heaven. Of course, they'll take his memories and put him in a religious setting so he'll follow the proper path and prove himself.

He's sent to earth as a younger version of himself, old enough to take care of himself but still rather young, with the excuse of having been in an accident for why he has no memories (it removes the hassle of having to fabricate memories) and gets taken in by the church. He becomes the priest for this small town church. He's rather popular, his attitude, though not typical of a priest, being refreshing after their previous priest. He's made a bit uncomfortable about how adamantly homophobic some of his parish is as a closeted gay man, but he plays it off and over all he's doing well enough for himself at his church. Kinda lonely since its his Parish and not real companionship, he doesn't have any other friends or family. Not to mention he's actually been Good about not being sinful or acting on vices. Life is kinda hard.

Lucifer heard about this whole experiment. It doesn't really matter how, but since he knows, of course he needs to interfere. He... Hasn't actually gone to Earth before. He's sort of Shackled to Hell, its part of his punishment. But he finds some sort of Loop hole, using an Asmodean Crystal and some of his own cunning, he manages to make it there. Of course, he finds he still has his limits, he can't really interfere with most Humans, but Adam is a special case because while he is very much Human, he's still holy beyond any other human currently on Earth, and that gives him the chance to get close. His plan is honestly just to get him to Sin, enough to damn his soul so that Heaven would lose him when he died. He wasn't really planning on getting too Directly involved, but more nudging him in viceful and sinful directions.

And then Lucifer entered the church to meet him. Hallowed ground doesn't Actually affect him, he was an Angel once, he still has Angelic Powers and Abilities. The worst would be a vague tingling.

(take rp snippets. I'm Lucifer and Adam is @fallenguitarhero)

The AU as a whole, though it's definitely full of sexual tension and smut, because of course it is, it's also... Weirdly wholesome?

Adam didn't really have a Chance to make real friends or feel like anyone truly cared about him, he lost his 'childhood' and then was raised by the church and no one from his past ever tried to reenter his life. Aside from the setting though, he doesn't have the long hard life he lived in his memories, so he's basically like Eden Adam all over again, childish in a more playful way, not as bitter or vindictive, not as cruel. And Lucifer is there trying to gain his trust, and having this Adam act so much like the one he befriended back in the Garden, well. Lucifer sees him as sort of a friend too. And its the first time Adam's really felt companionship like that in this life. Sure, Lucifer is the Devil, but he acts like he cares more about him on a personal level than anyone else ever has.

Does that make him more susceptible to falling to Sin? Sure. But he doesn't find himself minding when the Devil makes him Feel Things, from romantic and sexual attraction to true fondness and friendship.

And for Lucifer's part, he's decided he no longer wants to tempt Adam to Sin just to fuck with Heaven. No, he wants Adam to join him in Hell because he was Adam To Join Him In Hell.

⚠️🔞 And since I mentioned the sexual tension and smut-

Essentially, as soon as Lucifer noticed that Adam was showing interest in him from their first meeting, he knew he had to have him Carnally. It wouldn't be enough to simply convince him to sin in other ways, no. He wanted to fuck him because there's no quicker way to Damnation than having sex with the Devil himself, right? Especially as a closeted gay priest. And Lucifer has the very specific goal in mind of getting Adam to let him fuck him in the confessional.

Lucifer doesn't start out pushing sex or anything. He wants to build trust with Adam first. But it's really not that hard to get under Adam's skin, he hardly has to do anything! Adam is a sexually frustrated man who has an inexplicable draw to the Devil and it doesn't take him long to start getting off to the very thought of him, of what Lucifer would do to him. And of course, Lucifer knows. And it only takes a little more poking and prodding and nudging before he can get Adam to agree to indulge in his fantasies and make them real!

And then there's just a fun scenario in my head about them being nasty in the confessional (like Lucifer wanted) and someone entering the other side and so Adam has to do his Job while Lucifer has him fully hilted and seated on his lap with a prehensile tentacle dick that's moving around on its own while Adam has to try Really Hard to not let himself make any suspicious sounds while taking confession-

[anonymouscheeses]

No cuz in the snowgrave route SOMETHING gay had to have happened between susie and noelle when susie went in her room to save her, yall CANNOT tell me otherwise 😭🙏 like maybe a PECK a lil kiss or somthn

It would fit SO well with Noelle's new "i have to take control" mindset. And since she thinks it's a dream she gotta be like "eh who tf cares" and str8 up kiss the real susie on accident 💔 that would also explain why Susie goes back to chekc up on Noelle, which is pretty small and COULD be read as platonic... but thats a little suspicious. Since it's the most and probably only time Susie has ever shown interest in Noelle in the snowgrave route, so why would she care so much as to even see her again right before they close the fountain? HMM. almost like she's worried Noelle may not remember their little time together and wants to salvage what they have! HMM..

And on the spot im on right now uh Noelle is a bit too happy to have had an entirely horrible dream(which is even MORE evidence)? And cuz of that, Susie asks with a zesty ass smirk "did u have a good dream?" Of course Noelle says it was a nightmare cuz yknow we hurt our poor deer girl 😭 but i feel like Susie was a bit hurt by what she said cuz she doesn't reply after that and goes back into her little mean girl mask she puts on.

Thankfully Noelle says the end part was pretty nice and Susie gets all excited and giddy like damn lesbian 💔 and to top it all off Noelle gets SUPER nervous by that and rushes to get out of the room.

Idk this is my interpretation (whcih is basically canon cuz im always right trust guys 🙏) go with ur own headcanons or somthn i really dont care- but it also like, makes the most sense?! With the way they're acting, the character implications, and of course, since we can't see what did happen, I don't think Toby fox would want us to see them together so soon, or atleast not let us know about it yet. (Plus this would definitely be a wee bit toxic imo, because of Noelle's need for control. Or she'll get alot of character development! Maybe- i love toxic yuri but its gonna hurtt if its my babiess noo ☹️)

Another thing to add, later in the same scene, after Noelle leaves. Susie says "kinda sucks Noelle has to forget too..." that was NOT said in the normal route. Guys. Guys i think im gna 🥺 so yeah take it with a grain of salt, but something definitely happened in that room and imopo i'm taking it as suselle confirmation 😈

Anyways im ranting i just love deltarune sm and these two especially noelle rot my brain so im forcing my interests onto u 😼

Yes im playing snowgrave, yes it hurts to see my comfort character go thru hell why? 😭

[pellowinksx]

MOTIVATION FROM 🧷🧷🧷🧷🧷🧷🧷SAFETYPIN ANON🧷🧷🧷🧷 BC WE ALL NEED IT UTS TUESDAY AM I RIGHT

So yesterday was the worst. absolute worst. so tired of everythitn so much hatred. cried. anxious. couldnt focus on a damn thing. got more meds. drove well. etc. but didnt feel good at all. guys. trust if you ever feel in despair its not real. I was so tired and even then things changed. my friend only wears her emerald necklace. she wore a flower necklace instead? I zoned out listening to lana del rey in math trying to do void (ive been just popping up in there since I was a kid but it was out of desperation ykyk I was like no everything's bad I need to lock in!) and suddenly my math teacher was trying to get my attention even though he never rlly cares because I get good grades yk? then suddenly we did an all-class activity. at first I was gonna just revise that it ever happened but then I was like ykw no why is the world crazy. then today the boy that in my opinion. why can't he be a girl hes cute but im GAY. anyways. idk it all looked weird he looked different and I woke up smiling today even though yesterday I was crying and sooo sleepy. also before bed I realized I just had a headache all day and wasn't even tired... so it was all fine. ALSO make sure when you have bad days to remember it doesnt manifest because you dont persist in that. it doesnt matter if you feel like shit you wont attract shit ykyk. today feels fine I feel much better my bangs looked ass this morning but i feel better AND I took a video for my friends with my outfit and my friend just said 🧷 ur so beautiful like ur actually gorgeous WEEE! I feel better today guys a bad day only means you're one step closer to getting there trust me nothing can stop you, ever ever ever. its all fake and the world is an opp. trust yourself. anyways yap over i keep having dreams i forget. but they're not rlly awful. think I dreamed my SP again I drew her yesterday and then first thing when I wake up my friend posted a reel of Joan Jett to her story who I do in fact find cute. idc idc its real my hair is 24in and someone cute goes here. HOLY YAP. idk im an oversharer anywaysss. its like if I dont tell anyone I just think its not even real. ALSO im making a background video collage type shit for my choirs performance on Thursday and my teacher LOVES IT and I was nervous so I emailed her instead of going in person but she had me show ut to her on my phone and she loved it so much I have to get it done today/tomorrow ugh but im so excited its going rlly well. ALSO probably its bc I practiced too, I drive myself home every day but ive gotten significantly better at driving (I was an anxious wreck before). but also I started taking my iron pills again so. I think. that might be why things sucked for a while. guys. take your iron pills. they're not making your life suck I took like 4 yesterday (dont do that but I hadn't in months. guys dont mishandled your meds i do dumb stuff but you shouldn't ok???) now I feel blessed or whatever. so you know what. yeah. take iron. also try to absorb yourself in activities if you can only react to the world around you. thats why works for me AND I get to say I did things! I also love to say i already did it automomously without thinking (manifested) and that being upset only makes it happen more. bc lord knows I am an upset little child at times. anyways I feel much better will take iron and MAKE SURE YOU DO TOO! if u need it. I promise promise promise if some rando like me can change her whole face at the age of 12 you can get a text back, $5, whatever. dont hype a single thing up in ur head its all just THINGS in the world, even Carl Sagan says. everything in the universe is a "moat of dust, suspended in a sunbeam." now when I was un medicated I found that distressing but nothing is too much or too little you assign meaning so dont let anything assign it for you trust me it feels so good to be in control and you really are. yesterday I was crashing out and all that means is I have it today and yesterday and every day. trust

🧷

I love this so much I wish we were friends irl so I could just listen to you yap

lmfao, anyways. this is honestly amazing and a couple of points caught my eye, 1 when you were talking about smth abt bad days and then know it gets better. There was this girl who manifested her dream life on twitter, and she said a very interesting quote to me "if your life is falling apart right after you affirm and persist, I have some news for you" That really piqued my interest because its SO TRUE LIKE I feel like that's the biggest sign you could ever get but we turn it into a negative

2 girl have fun with it and turn him into a girl LMFAO you could just assume he was born a girl, whats he gonna do abt it (I mean- she 😂)

3. I LOVE THIS FOR YOU like you had a bad day yet you still persisted no matter what and stayed faithful and loyal like AGHHH girlie ily

you're so right, you really ARE in control so why stress about it?

[artemisthemooner]

Left Behind // Chapter 8: Yelling

Chapter 7

Ao3 Link

CW: Fae AU!Johnny MacTavish x GN!Reader, Simon 'Ghost' Riley, Yelling, Mentions of kidnapping, Arguing, Power Struggle between Soap and Ghost, Threats of violence, Features both of them being lowkey gay for each other, Sucky Scottish and equally as bad Mancunian

Summary: Ghost drags Soap outside to 'talk' (read yell at him) where they have a bit of a scuffle. Ghost threatens Soap into telling The Captain all about his issue with Birdie. At the same time, they discover that Birdie has flown the coop and is nowhere to be found.

Author's Note: This is like one of my favorite chapters that I've written mostly because I love the inherent trust and loyalty between Soap and Ghost both in this and in the canon material. I seem to be getting past my writers block luckily so hopefully I'll have a new chapter out on ao3 in the next couple of weeks. Meanwhile, I'll keep posting older chapters here. Anyway, this has been inspired by Peachesofteal's Which Witch fanfic which I highly recommend reading because it's so good.

Word Count: 6032

“Wha’ the ‘ell were ya thinking?!”

Johnny stood there for a minute, just processing. Then he processed some more. Why was he being yelled at again?

Oh, that’s right.

Kidnapping. 

He kidnapped a mortal.

Apparently, it didn’t matter that it was under very extenuating circumstances or that the mortal was a witch who had control over him. All that mattered to Simon was that he had kidnapped a mortal. A human. A major no no.

He didn’t care that you had tethers embedded in his soul. He probably would only care if he was the one you had put hooks into. Johnny was sure of it.

“Well? Anythin’ ta say fer yaself?” Simon asked again, his hands propped up on his hips.

Johnny stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jeans and shrugged. He knew how much of a petulant child he was being. He didn’t care. He had very well earned the right to act as a petulant child.

Simon pinched at the bridge of his nose, half covered by his mask and balaclava. He grumbled and shook his head, muttering, “Johnny…” He growled, shooting him a look.

A zing of electricity went shooting right up his spine, making him stand up straight. It was much like what happened every other time someone said his true name. It acted as a reminder for him that someone held power over him. Simon was using it to his advantage.

Luckily for him, two could play at that game. He returned Simon’s stare, “Simon.” He huffed back, standing all of his weight on one leg, putting himself in a stance that he hoped radiated pure sass. If he had affected Simon, he didn’t know it.

The two of them shared this look between them and continued to for a while.

At least until Johnny broke down and slammed his head into the stone wall behind him. A momentary ache radiated out from the impact point but if he was in any actual pain, he didn’t show it. He stared at the ceiling and sighed in defeat, “They have power over me.” He admitted shamefully into the silent air.

The only sound Simon made in return was a forceful exhalation of air from his covered nose. Ever a man of few words, that was practically him cursing up a storm.

Johnny let his head fall forward and into his open hands. Somehow, this was a way worse experience than when he had to admit the very same thing to Gaz. He couldn’t believe that it had only been three days ago when he did that. It had felt like a week. Maybe it had actually been a week and he just hadn’t realized.

Compelled to answer only by the silence of the charged air in the hall, he began to explain everything using only the one breath he had in his lungs.

He didn’t get more than a word into the whole thing before Simon stopped him in his tracks, “No.”

Johnny could barely lift his head to stare at him. But somehow, he managed it. Simon was staring at him with eyes much too wild for his liking, and damn, that was an achievement all on its own.

He blinked, finally registering what exactly he had said. He chuckled and shook his head in an insane amount of bewilderment, “No??? Si, ye canne jus’-- It already happened. There’s nocht ye can do about it.” 

Simon’s eyes hardened into ice behind his mask and his lips pursed into a straight line. He was thinking. And hard by the looks of it. He was coming up with a plan. Maybe he’d have more luck at it than Johnny had. He was always the planner after all. 

Johnny may have been smart on his own, certainly enough to come up with a plan all by himself, but there was something about Simon that just tamed him. When it came to him, he was much more akin to a loyal and well-trained dog. Simon gave the orders and Johnny carried them out, no questions asked. 

Simon started pacing back and forth, like a dark looming cloud of pure shadow. Although, that was also something he always tended to resemble, so that wasn’t too surprising to see. What was surprising to see was how concerned he looked. He watched as he strode back and forth, his eyes bouncing with his movements. 

Finally, he came to a stop and spun to face him, “No.” He said again, like it was some sort of holy revelation or epiphany.

Johnny honestly wondered if he was just going bonkers and if he needed to tell The Captain about it. He sighed, rubbing at his temples, “Si…”

“No, no, Johnny, listen.” His tone was sharp as a knife and Johnny’s spine straightened right up again. Oh, the consequences of letting him have so much power over his soul.

He snarled, “Oi! Dinnae do tha’ tae me, ye arse!”

“Jus’ listen to me.” Simon rolled his eyes.

“Fine. Whatever. Ah’m listenin’.” He grumbled, done with all of the theatrics, but that was Simon for you. Always dramatic. 

“I don’t give two shits how it happened or why ya let it happen–”

“Ye say tha’ as if Ah had any choice in the matter.” He interrupted with a comment and was immediately silenced from providing any further commentary by Simon’s withering glare.

“If ya’d let me finish?” He sighed, sounding exhausted and completely done with him. 

Maybe if he kept it up, he could get him to finally leave and he could go back inside and deal with you. There was still a conversation to be had between the two of you. One about your little stunt a year ago. It was sure to be peppered with many thinly veiled threats, but still. It had to happen eventually.

He let out a huffy breath but gestured for him to continue nonetheless.

“Good.” Simon nodded, “Wha’ I’d like ta know is if ya’ve told Price yet.” He looked at Johnny expectantly, like he was hoping for him to tell him he had.

But Johnny didn’t know what to tell him. He knew how ticked he’d be if he found out the truth, but he also knew how pissed off The Captain would be if he found out. He would never get the chance to talk to you. He’d never find out why you had sought out a Fae in the first place, let alone what you needed one for. There had to be a reason behind it all. A method to your madness. There was always a ‘why’ behind any given action. He just had to find yours.

But if he was forced to tell The Captain before he could take the time he needed to talk to you, he would never find that out. 

He couldn’t tell him the truth, but he also couldn’t lie to him. He was, quite literally, physically unable to. His tongue would never allow him the luxury of telling a sweet sweet lie. No Fae could. He frowned and grumbled out his answer. It was barely understandable, even to him.

Simon shook his head, “Tha’s wha’ I thought.” He sighed and pinned him down with one look, “Ya need ta tell him, Johnny. He needs ta know.”

“No can do, Si.” He vehemently shook his head, the shiver of his name hitting him in the center of his lungs and making his breath catch.

“An why is tha’?” He was quickly getting done with him. He could tell as much.

He snapped back, “Do ye even ken wha’ will happen if Ah tell ‘im?” He asked, impatience heavy in his tone. There was no way Simon didn’t know.

“He’d certainly be more capable of dealing wit it than ya would be!” He shouted back, throwing up his arms.

“Maybe Ah dinnae wan’ ‘im tae deal with it!” He stomped his foot. The sound echoed through the hall.

Simon scoffed, rolling his eyes, “Maybe ya should.”

“Well, Ah dinnae wanna.” 

“Stop bein’ so damned stubborn, Johnny.” 

Another zing of power ran through his body, tracing up and down his spine, over each one of his individual vertebrae. He groaned and shivered, “Knock tha’ shit off, Si. ‘s not fair.”

“Wha’s no’ fair is ya no’ tellin’ Price about all this. Do ya wan’ him to be completely blindsided when it’s found out?” Simon glared at him.

“It willnae be found out.” Johnny defended with a scoff. 

“Is tha’ fact or are ya guessin’?”

He kissed his teeth, “No one will find out anything. Hell’s bells, Simon.”

Simon’s shoulders shot ramrod straight for a second before he rolled them back out and growled at him. His eyes squinted behind the mask to show his displeasure. Johnny was sure he was going to reach forward and throttle him senseless with his own two hands, all for that singular comment and use of his name. 

But he didn’t. 

His gloved hands clenched together, then smoothed out against his leg, his thick fingers tap, tap, tapping away at his black cargo pants. He chuckled darkly, ducking his head. Few things scared Johnny, but that was definitely one of them. It didn’t help that when he raised his head again, his eyes were glinting a soft black, like he had just found himself some new human prey to take advantage of. Johnny hated when he did that. It never failed to creep him out and believe him, he had known Simon for a long time. Simon definitely knew the effect it had on him. 

He pressed himself back against the wall, as far away from his intimidating comrade as he could, “Wha’? Why’re ye lookin’ at me like tha’?” He asked, although he found himself not really wanting to know the answer. Usually, that look, coming from Simon, meant danger. It meant he was planning something and it was going to be something Johnny was not going to like. Not one bit. He tended to avoid Simon when he got like this. But he couldn’t do that now. He was trapped between a rock and a hard place there.

Simon’s head cocked to one side, which just made it all the more worse. If the eyes alone weren’t creepy enough, the mask and that look definitely added to it in a way he never liked. Johnny shivered as an unsettling feeling rose up through his spine from the bottom of his toes. Simon grinned, knowing how he affected him. That definitely did not help. He finally spoke, “Oh, it’s nothin’...” He shrugged.

Johnny wanted to sock him one, right in the jaw. Maybe followed by one right in the gut and a kick to the nuts. Anything to wipe that smug grin off his face. He scowled and pushed forward. He got right in his face and glared up at him, “Tis not ‘nothin’’, Si. Wha’ the hell are ye plannin’?”

Simon’s eyes glided up Johnny’s face and landed on a spot just above his head. He smirked a little more but said nothing. It was like he knew something Johnny didn’t.

He grabbed him by the bottom of his mask and dragged him down more to his level to look him in the eyes, “Wha’ is it?”

He grinned, mischief dancing in his eyes. But he still wasn’t answering him.

Anger rose in Johnny like bile from his stomach. He pulled Simon’s face closer to his, “Si.” 

“Johnny.” Simon finally returned, cooing mockingly.

His spine straightened involuntarily and he let out a deep growl under his breath, “Simon.”

If it had affected him again, he didn’t let it show. That only pissed Johnny off more. Stupid brick wall of a bastard.

Simon’s eyes left his and travelled back up, focusing on that one spot right above his head. When he tried looking for whatever he was staring so intently at, he found nothing there. He whipped his head back to glare at him, fury burning at his core, “Wha’ in the hell’s bells are ye gawkin’ at there, huh?” He shook Simon like a very large maraca, desperate to get an answer from the painfully stoic man.

At least it worked this time. Simon put his hands on Johnny’s wrists, smiling as he pulled his hands away from his mask, “Yer antlers. They’re showin’.” 

He couldn’t believe it.

All of that runaround just to be so smug when he finally told him.

He knew he should’ve punched him in the nuts.

“Ye fuckin’ bawbag!” He shouted and released him, patting desperately at his head. 

Sure enough, in his anger, he had forgotten to keep his glamour up and his antlers were showing. Ever tall and ever proud, like two large tree branches, they sprouted from either side of his head, twisting and turning. He groaned in annoyance, mostly directed at the smug arsehole across from him, “Yer a fuckin’ arsehole. Ye should’ve told me.” 

“I did tell ya.” He shrugged, leaning back against the wall, out of Johnny’s immediate reach. He was enjoying this way too much.

“After the fact!” He screeched at him louder than he meant to in his fury. There was no way his antlers were going away. Not with how angry and stressed he was. He needed to calm down.

Although, that was going to be difficult enough as is, for a number of reasons. Mainly two. One reason was because of how smug Simon was. The other reason was because of how much he wanted to just pummel Simon’s smug face into a pulp. But, unfortunately, he had enough power over him already. Even if he had let him have it in the first place, there was no way Johnny was going to be letting him have any more. That would be really idiotic of him.

Then again, there were times when he really wasn’t as smart as he should have been. Like that very moment.

It was happening before he even knew what was going on. He was already throwing the punch and he was already following through when he realized what he was even doing. But he didn’t stop himself either. 

He wanted to fight. 

He needed to fight.

Also before he knew it, he was being grabbed and restrained against the broad planes of Simon’s chest. Once he figured it out, he started kicking and fighting back. But no matter what he did, it did not work. He was stuck, both arms behind his back, pinned by Simon’s gloved hand. He grumbled, hissed, and growled, sounding much like a wild animal caught in a trap.

In a lot of ways, he was. 

Simon kept him there for a while, at least until he calmed down some more. Which did take a while.

When he had finally stopped his fighting, he whined pitifully under his breath, struggling only briefly, “Si, c’mon.” He tilted his head back to meet Simon’s eyes. He hated sounding like that, so pitiful and small. Weak. He was none of those things usually.

Simon was enjoying it however. His grin came back, as smug as it had been before. Maybe even more so. He met Johnny’s eyes, “Are ya done?”

He grumbled and rested his head against Simon’s chest, “Aye.” He gritted through his teeth.

“Good boy.” Simon nodded and dropped him on his feet. Johnny hadn’t even realized he had been off the ground in the first place.

He stumbled forward, almost landing head first in his own front door. He whipped back around, “Arsehole.” He grunted, wiping at his t-shirt, “Ye dinnae have tae held me so long, ye ken.” 

Simon shrugged nonchalantly, as he did everything, “Only way ta get ya ta stop and listen ta me.”

“Ah would’ve listened without it!” 

“Uh huh.” Simon was not believing it.

To be honest, neither was Johnny. He huffed and rolled his eyes.

Simon let out an amused huff of air, staring at him, or more at his soul, “Are ya finally ready to listen or do I need ta restrain ya some more? Ya know I’d be more than willin’.” 

It was the way he asked that made Johnny deeply aware that it was not a question in any sense of the word. It was a command. He was telling him to listen.

He gritted his teeth, ever the feral dog ready to bite, and nodded, “Wha’ is it.” He stared at his feet.

“Ya need ta tell Price.”

Johnny’s head whipped up to meet Simon’s cold eyes. He shook his head vehemently, “No. Ah told ye this. No way in all of the courts am Ah tellin’ him. He would have my head.”

“Fine. I’ll tell him.” 

“Ye willnae!” He practically screamed. 

Simon stared at him, utterly unaffected and unimpressed by how he was behaving. He stepped up to him, forcing Johnny to crane his head back just to meet his eye. He stared down the bridge of his crooked nose, “Ya will tell him, or I will. Which do ya think will go over better?” 

Another order disguised as an ultimatum and a question. He saw the truth of what he was saying.

Simon was telling…No. Commanding him. He was commanding him to be the one to inform The Captain of his issue. Otherwise, there would be consequences that he would have to live with. Like Simon taking matters into his own hands and telling him himself.

Either way, he was screwed.

If he was the one to tell The Captain, there was no way he would get the answers he so craved. He wouldn’t even be allowed to leave his home, let alone the Faelands.

But if Simon was the one to tell him?

He might as well be as worse as you, running and hiding like a coward. He wouldn’t be any better in the end. 

If Simon told The Captain, he would lose much more than just his freedom. He would completely lose his trust, and that was a dangerous thing to lose. More dangerous than losing a human with power over a Fae. And with the amount of hooks and tethers The Captain had in him, it just increased tenfold. Losing that trust would be like death for a mortal. There would be no coming back from that. Not for him anyway.

He scowled at the thought and cursed in his head. He hated this. He hated ultimatums. 

“Well?” Simon prompted him, raising his eyebrow high on his forehead. Don’t ask how Johnny knew that’s what he was doing.

He made a noncommittal grunt in return. He was desperately wracking his head for ideas. There had to be a way for him to avoid telling The Captain now that Simon knew his secret too. There was nothing there yet, but he was sure he could just stall him long enough for him to be able to come up with some sort of idea. He could do that. No problem.

“Gimme a bit, aye?” He tried.

“Mm.” Simon grumbled, but shrugged in resignation, “Fine.”

Very silently and very much in his own head, he celebrated. That gave a bit of time at the very least. If he had to guess, he would put how much longer he had at around ten minutes. Maybe. Really, it depended on what mood Simon was in for the rest of the conversation and how much more he could tick him off. Depending on those factors alone, his timeline could be either extended by a lot, or shortened by a lot. He wasn’t sure how much he liked that. But it definitely made his brain work that much harder in order to come up with a good idea, or just an excuse not to tell The Captain. He could stall some more. He made sure to act as nonchalantly as possible, “Why’d ye come here in the first place anyway? Ye couldnae have known Ah had them in my flat.” He asked, checking his blunt nails like they interested him so very much.

“Kyle texted me. Said ya disappeared last night and never texted him back.” Simon shrugged.

That brought back a burst of memories upon him, all from the night previous. He groaned and facepalmed. He had totally meant to text Gaz after he had gotten you back to his flat, but as soon as he had gotten you in his room, he passed out on the couch and stayed there until quite literally that morning. He had completely forgotten. And as per usual, in the recent events of his life, you were the one to blame. It was all your fault. All of it. If he hadn’t needed to use off of his glamour just to calm you down, he wouldn’t have been so exhausted and he wouldn’t have passed out on the couch from the exhaustion. He would’ve remembered to text Gaz back and he wouldn’t have felt the need to send Simon to check on him at his flat. All your fault.

He grunted, “‘Course he did.” He grumbled, “Tha’ right bastart.”

“Does Kyle know?”

The question didn’t surprise Johnny. He would have asked the same thing, down to the tone of voice. Didn’t mean he was too eager to actually provide an answer. He huffed reluctantly, crossing his arms.

“Johnny.”

His spine straightened and he gnashed his teeth together, “Knock that fuckin’ shit off!”

“Answer me an’ I will.” Simon promised as he stared back, a challenge in his eyes. He was daring Johnny to fight him on it.

He clenched his jaw tighter, “Fine, arsehole. He does ken.”

“Tha’s wha’ I thought. Did he tell ya ta tell Price too?”

“He might’ve warned me off not telling him.” He crossed his arms even tighter.

“He’s a smart cookie tha’ one. Smarter than ya anyway.”

Johnny glared at him, “Hey!”

“Am I wrong?” He asked and Johnny definitely saw that he raised a very judgemental eyebrow underneath his mask, which he took offense to. He took offense to the entire question itself. 

He bared his teeth, “Aye. Very.”

Apparently, he had fallen right into Simon’s nefarious trap. Simon grinned almost instantaneously, his lips twisting up, “Then why are ya the one who got himself hooked by a human if ya’re so smart? Can’t imagine tha’ has ever happened to Kyle.” 

“Awa’ n bile yer heid, arsehole bawlbag!” He cursed loudly, stomping his foot.

“English, Mactavish.” Simon responded dryly, acting as if he didn’t already know what Johnny was saying. He had heard it enough from him after all. There was no way he didn’t know what it translated to. Just as Johnny was doing to him, Simon was attempting to rile him up. Surely just to get him to act as an idiot.

He scowled, squinting his eyes. He leaned forward and growled, “Go fuck yerself, Si.”

“Gladly.” Simon smirked, very much satisfied with himself. Johnny wanted to throw himself to him and punch him again, but he knew what would happen if he did. Simon knew it just as much as he did.

He rolled his eyes, “Ye’re a real pain.”

He shrugged and leaned back against the wall, staring dead-eyed at Johnny, staring into the very depths of his soul. 

He shivered under the weight of his gaze and shot him a very dirty look, “Knock tha’ shit off. Creepy motherfucker.” He muttered, rubbing his hands along his biceps.

Simon kept staring at him. And staring. And staring. In utter silence. That was, until, he finally spoke again, just to say, “Ya need ta tell Price.” He pointed out unhelpfully, “Ya can’t just avoid it fer the rest of yer life. He will find out.” He reiterated.

He guessed the time had come. He had to come up with an excuse and now.

Very lamely, he shrugged, “Ah will. Eventually.”

“No.” Simon shook his head and got up really close. Probably closer than he needed to be.

Johnny blinked and scoffed, looking side to side in the hallway, like there was anybody else to witness this. He shook his head, confused, “No??? Wha’ do ye mean by no???”

“I mean no.” He said again, nodding insistently.

He grumbled, rubbing at his head, “Ugh, c’mon, Si, Ah said Ah would.” He complained, “Innit tha’ wha’ ye wanted? Me tae tell him?”

“Ya said ya’d tell him ‘eventually’. Ya forget tha’ I know ya, Johnny.” He reached forward and pawed at Johnny’s jaw with one massive hand, brushing his thumb over his cheek.

He had to force his spine to slacken, huffing, “Exactly. Ah’ll tell him. Eventually.”

“Yer eventually means ya’ll do it in about a hundred years. By then yer lil mortal master will be dead and very well gone.” Simon looked at him with all the seriousness he could muster, which was a lot. But Johnny didn’t really understand why. Not like he was going to admit that though.

He shrugged, playing it off, “Tha’ sounds alright tae me.”

Simon pulled his hand off his cheek, backing away and pinching at his nose, “I know ya haven’t been around tha’ long but tha’ doesn’t mean ya should be such a goddamned idiot.”

“Oi!”

“The longer ya avoid tellin’ him, the more trouble ya’ll be in, ya know that, yeah?”

Unfortunately, Johnny did know that. He knew it all too well. But he was already in too deep. At this point, he was just hoping he could get all of it resolved before it went on too long. And that was going to happen after Simon was gone, when he could finally go back into his flat and have that long awaited conversation with you. You would not be getting away from him ever again, not when he knew where you lived and who you were friends with. He would have that conversation with you, even if it killed one of you. More likely you than him though. You humans were always so weak compared to the Fae.

He grumbled, “‘Course ya ken tha’. Ah’m not tha’ much o’ an idjit.”

“Hard to believe.” Simon muttered under his breath, “So ya understand tha’ ya need ta tell him sooner, not later.”

“Uh-huh.” He nodded uselessly, mumbling half under his breath. He really did not want to agree with Simon, even though he knew he needed to.

“So ya’ll tell him?” Simon’s eyebrows rose again, Johnny could tell.

He closed his eyes and rubbed at his eyes, “Mhmmm..” He really did not want to. Maybe he could still get out of it if he tried hard enough.

Or so he thought.

“Johnny.” Simon grabbed at his face again, his warm hands encapsulating his cheeks. He forced his eyes open and into his gaze.

The tingle that travelled up his spine was warm and crackly, like a wood fire burning through his system. Despite that, he shivered, “Wha’?”

“Tell me ya’ll tell him.”

Johnny sighed in defeat, his head tilting back. Simon’s roughened and gloved hands forced it forward again so his eyes stayed focused on his. He relented, in utter annoyance, “Fine. Ah’ll tell him.” He couldn’t believe himself. He couldn’t believe how easily he had given into Simon’s demands. 

He could’ve sworn he had more fight in him than that.

Apparently not.

“Good boy.” Simon praised him, patting at his cheeks. His hands then slipped back to his sides, right into his pockets.

He frowned deeply, practically scowling in return. He hated this. He didn’t need to be praised for giving into some demands. He didn’t want to be praised for it either. He didn’t want to be praised for giving in. He crossed his arms, “Whatever.” He grumbled, “Since ye got wha’ ye need from me, Ah suppose ye’re done here and ye can go?”

“Maybe.” Simon leaned back against the wall, regarding him with a cool expression, “Unless ya’ve got something else ya’re hidin’ from me…But ya wouldn’t do that, now would ya, Johnny?” His eyes glinted, just daring him to try hiding anything bigger than you, or a breadbox, from him. 

If he did have anything else to hide, Johnny was sure Simon would be the one to find it.

Invasive bastard.

He reached for his front door and looked back at him expectantly, his hand wrapped around the door handle and ready to push it open, “Would ye like to have a look fer yerself an’ confirm tha’ Ah’m not?”

“I might take you up on that offer.” Simon cocked his head and gestured for him to open the door.

He did so, pushing the door open further and walking back inside, “C’mon then. Let’s have a look-see.”

He didn’t realize it at the time, but something was different inside his flat. Something was off. Something was missing.

But he was too busy grumbling to notice, wondering why he had even bothered to offer in the first place. He knew that it was only going to be more trouble for him than it was all worth. Possibly even more trouble than you were. 

Not to mention, it made it so that he had to continue delaying talking to you even more than he would have liked. 

It made no sense to him why he offered. He had known deep down that Simon was going to want to have a look. Even if he was absolutely sure Johnny had nothing to hide, he would still make sure to have a look. It was just the way he was. Johnny knew that. For as long as he had known him, it was just the way he always had been. 

Just as Gaz had always been charming and The Captain had always been commanding, Simon had always been more suspicious than all of them combined. Johnny had never really been sure why that was the case and he never wanted to figure out the reasoning behind it. It was Simon’s business after all. 

Just as Johnny’s was whatever was in his flat. Which should’ve been you.

At least, it would’ve been, if you were still there. 

But you weren’t. 

Finally he had realized what had felt so off about his place. He had figured out what was missing. It was you. 

He wasn’t sure how exactly he knew that, but he did.

It didn’t help that as soon as Simon walked into his flat for the second time that day, he bee-lined it straight to the kitchen and stopped dead center. He looked around, then back at Johnny, who was standing in the entrance way. He frowned, “Where’d they go?” 

That just confirmed the bad feeling that had settled into his bones and nestled in the deepest crevices of his soul. He clenched his fists and looked around, “Ah dinnae. Ah thought Ah left ‘em right here..”

He didn’t like that. He didn’t like that one bit. He really hoped you were just off hiding somewhere and you hadn’t just completely escaped. But he also had the bad feeling he was very wrong.

“How did ya lose a human? They’re the easiest damned things ta take care of.” Simon remarked.

Johnny shot him a dirty look, “As if ye’ve had any experience with them either! Besides, it’s not completely my fault. Ye were here too!” 

“Yer human, yer responsibility.” Simon shrugged and plopped his ass down on the nearest stool. Instead of being helpful, he took to watching Johnny and being generally UNhelpful.

He rolled his eyes, “Awa’ n bile yer heid. Help me find them, aye? Instead of sittin’ there all pretty.” He drifted into the next closest room, just as he was hearing Simon getting off the stool and starting to move around. As empty as it was, it was meant to be an office. Though, he never used it as such. It was just as barren as the day he had bought the place.

Luckily, that also meant you had no place to hide from him in there. After all, there was no furniture to crouch behind.

He moved on through the halls, ducking his head into each room on his side of the flat and checking them out. 

He could hear the distant yet very distinct sounds of Simon moving through the rooms on the other side, also ones that he never used, separated by the living room that was never used either.

Since there was no sign of you in the rooms he had checked, he returned to the kitchen. It just so happened that he was returning right at the same time Simon was. They met over the kitchen island, staring at each other with concern in their eyes.

He leaned against the counter, bracing himself with his hands, “Anythin’?”

Simon shook his head, crossing his arms on the island counter, “Not one sign of ‘em. It’s like they never existed.” He commented, rubbing at the back of his neck.

“Aye.” He begrudgingly agreed, then sighed in exhaustion. Only you would be bold and cocky enough to escape from a Fae’s flat, if that was even the case. It was likely to be that, but he couldn’t help but wonder if you had just cast some sort of spell that made them completely oblivious to your presence. It would make sense if that were the case. That kind of spell would be very well within the purview of your supposed power level. He had seen plenty of witches with power levels similar to yours cast those kinds of spells.

The only minor discrepancy to that theory of his was that, even if you were more powerful than he could have first thought, Fae like him and Simon could typically sense when a spell had been cast in their general vicinity. But he wasn’t getting any feeling like that. Not even a tingle when he went past a dark corner. That led him to believe that, for some bizarre reason, you had not used a spell to escape them.

But if that wasn’t the case, how could you have gotten past them in the first place? 

You couldn’t have used the front door, not with them standing right outside having their conversation. They would’ve seen the door open.

You couldn’t have gone out a window either. His flat was not very close to the ground, so any attempt to jump out would have certainly ended in a painful death, knowing how fragile humans and their bones were. 

There was no way you weren’t still in the flat. They had to have just missed you somehow.

He sighed and buried his head in his hands, wracking his mind for some sort of solution to this puzzling situation. They had to find you. He had to talk to you. He had so many questions for you.

Finally, he thought of something they could do. He looked up and met Simon’s dead-eye stare. Simon raised his eyebrow again, a questioning look in his eye. Johnny pushed himself off the counter and started off at a brisk pace towards the other side of the flat. The side Simon had been searching. He glanced over his shoulder as he walked, “Let’s switch. Ye search tha’ side.” He told him as he ducked into one of his guest rooms, gesturing towards the other end of the flat. The side he had been searching originally. Simon nodded and walked off towards that side.

Johnny, warmed with a new purpose in his step, went through each and every room with a fine tooth comb, looking for you. 

He was starting to run out of steam when he stepped into the very last room, a bedroom he never used at the end of the long hallway spanning the center of his flat. There, he found a window, pushed wide open in a way that he didn’t remember doing. He was sure he hadn’t done it and he was more than sure Simon hadn’t either. 

But he would’ve bet everything that you had.

He ducked his head out, then slipped onto the rusty old fire escape below. He cursed, “Crap.”

He knew it. He knew you had escaped. Apparently, you had done it through a window.

Classic.

Just fucking classic.

[nerdishpursuits]

And this is one of the countless reasons I love chatting about Mafin with @midniteowlet: she's my very own toma a Tierra and grounds me, so I can approach things more rationally.

Upon concluding our debate of the current turn of events on the show, Mafin on the whole and their narrative? I've come to look at things as follows. The show very much reflects society as it is: a sad state of affairs where good people hurt and unsavory characters often prevail. The fact that we want everything good and wholesome to triumph at every turn? Idealistic, not realistic. Not to mention lofty expectations actually prevent one from truly appreciating the show, with all its ups and downs and winding roads. And personally, I'd like to keep enjoying it, without getting dragged down the utopian rabbit-hole.

For the most part, the representation we get is actually well crafted: Mafin feels organic, tried and true, and the chemistry between them is undeniable and thrilling. More so? Their story doesn't feel forced and thus, can be promoted to any viewership without it coming across as preachy and condescending, or having an agenda. If anything, Mafin is by far the best developed, healthiest relationship on the show. I, for one, much prefer the portrayal of good communication, heartfelt romance and overcoming obstacles together than a deluge of r-rated scenes. And honestly? We are being offered a damn good story here, even as it fails to satisfy everyone's hopes and demands (which in all honesty, it never could - at the end of the day, someone will always be disappointed)

I'm also reminded of Marta B. mentioning in a recent interview that the show is not aimed exclusively at the sapphic community. As such, it will not depict or cater to its particular needs. It's part of a larger ensemble and needs to appeal to a broad audience. And, when all is said and done, it actually manages to accomplish more with this kind of storytelling: one that's simpler, one that doesn't try to be pedantic. Ergo, they will not linger and preach to the audience. What they will do instead is allow the characters, their circumstances and actions, to speak for themselves. And they will trust they're doing a good enough job to let people draw their own conclusions. So far, I think they've achieved that: there’s heterosexual people watching the novela who love Mafin and think they’re the best couple on the show, there’s elderly people learning to be more open-minded, everyone loves Damian's character development, everyone hates Santiago and acknowledges he is a despicable lowlife etc. The show is moving the pieces along the board quite deftly and it makes for an interesting, if not always gratifying, game.

As for today's episode? There's no doubt that Marta and Fina only have eyes for each other. They're an established couple who will face anything thrown their way as they always have, as one. No mustachioed men will ever change that. Marta and Fina's narrative will never be whether they desperately adore each other. That they do couldn’t be more obvious. Their story? Ever has it been, and will continue to be, about their fight to attain freedom: freedom to live their love in a society that forbids it.

Therefore, I've reached the point where I'm not worried at all about either Santiago or Pelayo. Based on Pelayo's reaction upon learning Marta is a lesbian? I doubt he'll help Santiago in his attempt to sink Marta's ships. To me he comes across as a calculated businessman, but not a heartless one. He stands to profit more from a partnership with the de la Reina family than throwing Marta to the wolves. He also didn't bat an eye at Santiago's reveal, wasn't surprised or outraged. Which, I'll go out on a limb and say, is telling. He's either gay himself or simply plans on advancing his business / political career by securing a partner that won't demand his attention or affection. The first scenario ensures he remains socially upstanding while the second allows him to live as he pleases. To a man like Pelayo? It's a jackpot either way. Hopefully, the benefits outweigh the costs for Marta as well, should the plot move in that direction. And given all the signs? It's already halfway there.

That being said. It remains to be seen what happens to Santiago. I assume, and hope, his little ploy at denouncing Marta to the Civil Guard will cost him, dearly or otherwise. His own thirst for vengeance pushed him to make the wrong move which is, in my opinion, seeking out Pelayo. And while there's plenty of outraged cries that Marta & Fina don't need another man to save them? Let's not forget it's 1958. The likelihood of neither of them attracting a suitor, fake or otherwise unwelcome, is as doubtful as improbable. The fact they managed to successfully evade them so far? Quite the feat.

As for what awaits? Marta won't go to jail, I think, since that card has already been played. Or who knows? We might be surprised. The fear they need to instill in her requires new heights, in order for Marta to reluctantly accept another cage. Mind you, she's still trapped: as much freedom as she currently wields, Marta remains a woman whose very social status entraps her, singling her out as prime real estate. She's the proverbial golden goose, especially as dictated by the mores of society back then. Marta and Fina's shared dream of freedom remains, for now, a dream. One they've almost had at their fingertips, which makes their current circumstances all the more painful. I will say: it stings that Fina won't be the first to read Marta's journal. Undoubtedly, at some point, she will. After all, that journal is a mirror of Marta's very heart. It lays out her deepest fears, her innermost longings. It chronicles the fiercest battles Marta has had to wage with herself, her losses and triumphs, her meditations and hymns, the anguish and the deliverance of her love for Fina. To have it fall into the wrong hands? A violation of the utmost personal, a desecration of what is deemed sacred and untouchable. The diary symbolizes Marta having a safe space to call her own, one where she was allowed to embrace her true self, one that initiated her journey to freedom, her quest to rid herself of her shackles. Santiago has no honorable bone in his body and his hatred towards women, and Marta in particular, drives him to invade and vandalize her privacy, this blessed sanctuary she got to call her own. Let's see if Pelayo rises to the occasion and proves himself as a noble character. You can never have too many allies. Do I still take issue with how certain things are handled, with the inconsistencies and shoddy character work? Definitely. But I’m also able to simply sit back and enjoy. Let's see where all this goeth, shall we? Hello pain, let's go again.

[jinbeisluffy]

Me and my friend hung out for a few hours yesterday and yapped about op way too much so now i wanna contribute more sexuality hcs but for side characters instead of any specific group. you can have ur own hcs these r just mine

ace - TRANS TRANS TRANS TRANS TRANS you will believe in transmasc ace agenda. he is so trans, what are you doing walking around shirtless CONSTANTLY if not to flex your top surgery scars. he’d beat up anyone as a kid who called him a girl hes known this for a WHILE. sexuality wise hes gay, hes gay and theres not a hint of asexuality in him because hes a freak and unapologetically loves men openly. gay icon in the op world

law - i havent seen law being shipped with a woman once and i find that really funny and telling of what people think of him. and theyre correct, hes a gay man. difference between him and ace is that he’d rather die than admit he even likes people so yk. cis but he did ace’s top surgery

sabo - i have never before seen a character so very much be aromantic without being an implied aromantic character. hes not repulsed by romance its just that hes preoccupied with overthrowing the government and supporting his brothers at all times, he has other things to worry abt. gender, could be anything and could honestly fluctuate depending on the day. at the very least, he fist fights transphobes on the daily and in a modern au would hangout at iva’s drag bar and fight anyone who acts weird

yamato - if you dont think yamato is a transman i want you to get away from my blog okay thanks. that isnt a hc, thats a fact and ppl who disagree are weird in my eyes. sexuality wise, he could honestly like ANYONE, but he just finds himself drawn to men more often than not (ace) so if you were to ask him he’d just say “oh men are cool, women are pretty but you know i cant find myself drawn to them” and he thinks hes normal get a load of this guy

kaku - most proudly bisexual guy to exist. i think he started to think more to himself about things during his time at water 7. he could also be okay with it and live his life that way without any shame because he wasnt an assassin working for the government there, he was kaku so yk, he could actually openly be with whoever he wanted. gender, cis man but if you talk about him using they/them only he’d just laugh and not correct you

lucci - hah gay. him and kaku probably got married in water 7. cp9 questioned kaku for marrying lucci, meanwhile pauile just questioned to himself how things would work cause of the pigeon. lucci is such a gay man, he fucking trans too dont ask me how i know i just know. Ai can sniff out my fellow transguys from a mile away alright

kalifa - oh i love it when women hate on men but the second a woman shows up she acts all flirty and confident. totally heterosexual of you kalifa. no but shes such a man hating lesbian, she always has been and could probably be due to men’s treatment of her during childhood which made her really not like most of them. i need to write out a backstory for her damn. oh and shes trans trust me on that one

koby - sometimes a lot of op characters will be inlove with luffy and never get their feelings returned, and one of those people is koby. yeah hes gay, and asexual he just kept discovering stuff like that when training under garp cause garp is so okay with everything, and then we incorporate more moments between him and helmeppo like in the live action where they sit and talk about stuff. koby realises hes gay and sighs. “that explains a lot…”

buggy - gaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy he doesnt like women he cant bring himself to he had his first tragic yaoi relationship as a teen and never looked back. gender is whatever you want it to be baby. freaky as all hell my GOD every time im reminded of the cross guild and what they do to buggy i just know. theyre so freaky

shanks - bisexual icon but hes been hung up on the same ex (buggy) for so many years that other romances are less prioritised cause “omg what if buggy comes back:}” get over it man he aint coming back for u. trans man, look at him and his pussy yeah thats a trans dude hell yeah

Said friend i yapped with is —> @brooks-heart-sunglasses pookie 🤞