#its 4am im just raging | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

micropoe10 · 1 year ago

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Dumb Ways to Die..BG3 Edition!! Part: 2

Long post EXTREMELY LONG POST...okay maybe, probably not that long?? DEFINITELY LONG and Possible spoilers?!? I'm not sure read at your own peril! IT'S TOTALLY WORTH IT THOUGH🤣

If you didnt read Part: 1 do that now :3

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We left off with Astarion and Wyll trying to kill a couple of gate goblins to free the spiders. If you remember Halsin told me to kill the BIG THREE Goblin Camp Leaders. Shadowheart and my ALT character are trying to kill off the random goblin that joined the fight when Granny Gut (one of the BIG THREE) steps in. Now compared to the other 2 bosses she is a walk in the park. But she does come with her own annoying small pack of goblin mobs.

Wyll and Astarion FINALLY kill off the gate spamming guards and unlock the doors, the spiders are estatic and start helping me kill off the goblins. As I foretold my ALT and Shadowheart make quick work of Granny Gut and killing off the extra few stragglers proves to be a breeze. I'm calling this a WIN. About this time I am going around looting bodies cause.. 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑CHA CHING🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑

I was also totally not tabbed out looking at ASTARION TIKTOKS 🥰When I tab back in the spiders are gone and I'm like ohhh probably should find them. Around this time is when I should have healed up with more than potions. This is where I should have been the voice of reason the MOM of the group and taken a Long Rest...

Yea I should have been this person but... instead I go in search of the spiders and find their smoldering dead corpses. And the part of me that lost them as fighting allies is sad and morns them. But not before I roll a NAT 20 in OVER-CONFIDENCE! I dont need them, they were just spiders I can kill the rest of these mobs I've done it before this is nothing now that I killed the majority of them. I walk my party to a side enclave we'll call it, its RIGHT before one of the big bads. I walk right past them they arent thinking that I'm a threat. THAT IM A TOTAL EDGE LORD COME TO SUNDER THEM!!!!! That I'm about to ruin their day, now I dont always spin my camera around.......I probably should have...

In my over-confidence I attack said goblins. There's only 3 right....WRONG...HORRIBLY WRONG. No in the doorway of which I stood was a room that I thought void of creatures instead I was greet with 3 goblins to my back quite literally I was in a tight spot when they called upon WORG companions. This is fine.....everything is fine..I am fine WRONG! My presence in killing off these goblins has alerted the nearby attention of

DROR RAGZLIN whelp im fucked...

We pick off mob after mob that dealt us devastating blows. Remember that I had not taken a LR (Long Rest) soooo I had NO spell slots for anyone... and (cough,cough Shadowheart) a cleric with no spell slots to heal just... just becomes a glorified DPS. And if you know/love Shadowheart..please dont come for me but ma'am.....

☠️I NEED YOU TOO HIT SOMETHING other than the floor!!!!! ☠️

10/10 Misses everything AGAIN!

She was the first too fall, calling to me for aid I helped her up (though it was pointless) Dror Ragzlin's rage was just too much for her. About this time I was waiting for it too go through initiative. My ALT is almost dead popping health potions left and right, Astarion is barely hanging on.. As I stare down Dror Ragzlin with an intensity that screams IM STILL STANDING!!

and thats when it dawned on me... I'm going wait OMG where is WYLL did he LEAVE me?? Did he get killed and I just cant see him?? I look to my party list and notice that Wyll is very much alive and well infact, he has full health and i'm sitting there in my 4AM stupor wondering when was the LAST TIME I used him in this long list of initiative rolls..... Remember when I said to remember that I UNGROUPED WYLL to save the spiders.... and remember me saying in PART: 1

☠️☠️☠️ALWAYS REMEMBER TO GROUP YOUR PARTY☠️☠️☠️

This is why, when I realized that Wyll had infact not been fighting with me this entire time I grouped him into the party and walked him into combat. Together with Astarion and Shadowheart lying helpless on the floor Wyll and I fought, struggled to keep alive against Dror Ragzlin and two of his minions. Until even Wyll too fell unable to carry on and then it was only Me, Myself and I contemplating what my options were with 3 health, no potions, no party members, no spell slots, no sleep and the VERY LIKELY possibility that I would have to load into my last save again......

😨😱😰

my last save...NOOOOOOO...I pull up the load menu while its still my turn. And I scroll down the list of saves that I have made ONLY to come to the horrible conclusion that my last save... Was made in the dungeons where I had only JUST rescued Halsin..ALL of my progress with the small goblin mobs, saving the spiders, killing Granny Gut, ALL the loot.

ALL GONE...ALL of it had to be REDONE.

I succumbed to defeat, in my pain, my loss I laughed through it. A learning lesson we'll call it. I ended my turn without doing anything more and took the killing blow! I loaded into my last save, and sat stunned and dumbfounded..how much more easier would it have been if I had taken that long rest, if I had GROUPED my party members back together.

Let my pain, my mistakes be a lesson for all! Carry on with this knowledge my fellow adventurers.😅❤️

Until the NEXT STORY TIME this has been Dumb Ways to Die.

#bg3 stuff #bg3 spoilers #bg3 wyll #bg3 astarion #bg3 oc #bg3 shadowheart #dumb ways to die #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 goblins

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randomcontentdude · 1 month ago

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The only one that can get inside of their place, so I’m monitoring their location and I see they stop at the stadium for a bit, so I assume equestrian friend needs to puke (I was later told she was, indeed, puking, and also that some cars almost chopped her head off). So I’m running through the avenue and if I had a penny for every time I have ran this avenue while being under the influence I would have three pennies, which is way too many times running down this mf place in the middle of the night. Now that I have everything im just running down the ave trying to get to monkey’s place until I decide to check their location and they were inside of the house, which allowed me to chill out and just walk like a normal person. I drop everything off but at this point I had forgotten my headphones so I decide to call a friend of mine, and I told her how I felt about not ever being as attracted to anyone as I was to GG blonde and how it’s awful to think I’ll have to “settle” for someone or how I would feel if someone settled for me and how it was unfair, how everything was super confusing at this point and that I was unsure of what was gonna happen, she told me to meet up with him the following day. I get inside of my place after staying in the phone outside for half and hour at 4am in 2C. I took a boiling shower and went to bed.

Sunday

God okay so we’re eventually catching up with the days of the week, I’m writing this on Wednesday but oh well. So I wake up on Sunday and life felt great for me, I asked him if he wanted to go climbing to which he answered positively, we talked about finals and studying and this is where I learn he finishes his exams right before I leave for the holidays, meaning he could be gone by the time I come back to the city. So now it is truly a “is this the last time I’ll ever see him”. Anyways, now I’m starting to feel uni deadlines breathing in my neck, assignments and midterms coming up and I’ve wasted my weekend in completely random side quests instead of properly studying. This is where I mention that I was in the phone with my mom when she asked about emo friend and his boyfriend, and she said “Ig we’re cursed in love, we always have bad luck” and I’ll talk about that in more depth in later posts. I’m feeling super stressed because these are two courses I’ve been out of date and completely lost on for the last few weeks. So I’m desperately downing macroeconomic presentations until I can't do it anymore, at some point I hope onto the sofa where my friends are watching a movie and eventually I crash asleep for like 15 minutes. I wake up and keep studying, im picking at literally any little snacks im able to find In the house even tho im super full because I had a whole pot of pasta for lunch. Anyways, time comes around and I head home to change, GG blonde tells me he's gonna be a bit late but thats fine because I was running late too, I always account for him being late so im never on a rush unless I am. I leave for the climbing gym and eventually we meet, I feel bored with him, I feel stuck. I had been going to the climbing gym for a few days non stop by this point so all the routes were a bit boring by now but I was also bored because I feel like him and I are stuck, were not progressing anywhere, we're not becoming friends and we are not becoming lovers neither and this constant limbo is getting to me, i cannot handle it no more, I decide its enough, I feel uncomfortable and like im wasting my time, I feel dine, I feel rage and boredom, I feel bothered, I feel annoyed. I tell him he looks distracted and he tells me about how one of his exes reached out to him yesterday, I tell him id rather kill myself than having to deal with someone from my past but he says it didn't end badly and that he has good memories with him, it was just not meant to be. At this point I already feel like leaving, so we climb a bit more and then we leave. I go home and im stressed about macroeconomics, I couldn't care any less about gg blonde, im done with him (I desperately want to talk with him). I try to study a bit but decide im to stressed and tired and just go to bed.

Monday

So I wake up Monday feeling a little better, I go to class and we have a bit of a fun time trying to nail some posters into the concrete wall with some pins, I go to pilates. I send an instagram reel to gg blonde about climbing with someone thats super tall and he answers "evil midgets" to which I answer "Yk I thought I saw you last night, then I realised it was just a pole, tall and stiff😁" he answered "wowww, fair enough". I feel great about myself, I joked about him and I feel like im in control, I feel like we're friendly and I get to lowkey insult him. bear in mind im super flexible so I get to say his stiff if I want. At night the following happens and I feel like I have some feelings about this so here I go. In the flat our flatmates decide to meet, I dont really care about anything they might say but in case they say something really stupid I decide im not going to to be there so I can have plausible deniability, I love my plausible deniability, I dont say anything, i dont agree, I dont disagree, so then I get to to whatever I want, but that is because I dont really mind or care and know I will mostly abide with what they ask me. I tell this to emo friend and he decides he also wants plausible deniability, he decides he also will come to monkey friend's house. I agree because, it's not my house and I know monkey friend also likes him. I will be studying anyways so it's not really worthy for me to clash about this, however I am a bit annoyed that I dont get a break, sometimes I feel he is too clingy. And here is the thing, he has a lot of problems with the people of the flat, he is constantly annoyed by them, he has to solve his beef, he is not like day them and they do not like him. Im distant but polite and nice with everyone, emo friend has this tendency of talking shit about them when he knows they will hear him and im stuck In the middle of everything. I cook dinner and take it to monkey's, we eat and I try to work on my homework, im not getting anything, I cannot do this assignment and im going to do so bad, I feel a lot of guilt coming in, all the weekend procrastinating. Why have I done this? why am I so irresponsible? I need to handle my shit. Emo friend helps me out, he literally gives me the answers allowing me to turn in my assignments in time. I feel grateful for him, even when sometimes I wanna kill him and I just want to be left alone, he is a good friend and im ultimately grateful to have him. I go back home and go to bed.

Tuesday

I come back from uni and just sleep all afternoon, I have an statistics midterm the following day and I had not studied shit, im feeling super bad and im annoyed and im sad and im stressed, I call my mom and ask her to get me a new Apple Pencil because mine got lost at the beginning of the semester and it would be rather nice to finally give some use to my iPad, she agrees, I go to pay, they dont accept her credit card. I try again, error again. I give up, ive got to pay for it, I aint got any money so now I have to wait after travelling to get my Apple Pencil and be broke for another month. Im craving suicide, it's not accepted because the card is not from the same country as the store, I know this because it has happened many times before. I tell her im gonna chop off my hair because I cannot deal with it anymore, she tells me to go to the hairdresser and now im spiralling. I hate the products I currently have and I dont have time nor money to go back to my previous routine, I am terrified of going to the hairdresser, I have known I need a haircut for at least two months now but ive been in constant denial because im terrified. I have been growing out my hair for at least two years now and im scared they are going to cut it too short, I never had a good haircut in my whole entire life, I had an undercut for like two years and im recovering from that, im trying to grow everything equally and it is indeed time for me to visit the hairdresser, but Im panicked. I buy myself a mystery pack from a cafeteria near my place, they are super cheap because its the leftovers of the day and its a lot of food. I go pick it up ad had a funny situation with the door which lightened up my mood a bit, and something that made me super happy was that they gave me two of my fave sandwiches. I have that for dinner and some extra pastries, at this point im feeling super anxious and I know im not gonna focus anyways, so I tell him to come over to my room since he had asked me to have dinner earlier and I had declined, I told him I had some pastries left. He comes over we talk, he eats all my pastries, mind you there were like 5 pieces of pastries left. God I know you haven't got dinner and that you're desperately trying to safe every penny you have but leave my pastries out of it, I dont give that much importance to it since I had gotten my moneys worth already and they were too many calories I shouldn't have been consuming since I have been stress eating junk food since Sunday, but im still annoyed by this, its manners, dont eat my pastries, what if I wanted some for breakfast? there were FIVE pieces left, if not more, and you decide to eat them all, well thank you. I keep studying once he leaves deep into the night, I am going insane, im not understanding shit, im confused, I want to go back home but I realise im far too deep into this shit and I can't go back home at this point and I have to finish my career here, I want to cry myself to sleep. I go to bed giving up in my midterm.

Wednesday

I wake up skipping my first class, I print some formulas that I needed for the exam and head to the bus station, I like using the train but its okay because I live a minute away (literally) from the bus station, I try to catch snow-white but I miss her by a few people, the trains were not working properly and theres only two ways of getting to our uni, train or bus, so the buses were going full. Luckily the system was in our favour and they decided to send more buses to our line and as soon as snowhites bus left I got into a another one and got to uni with time, I was stressed, I was feeling down. I study for a bit and get to my midterm, I notice one of my friends using chatgtp to cheat and im like she so smart wtf, but my moral code is too strong and I push through. We get out, I had told Plurinational friend I was not staying for pilates, my morale is on the floor. She insists that I stay and that it will bring my spirits back up, I stay for lunch, emo friend comes along which is nice but not so much because I feel oversaturated of him. I want to talk one on one with plurinational because I want to tell her about how I feel in general in regards to my academics and my general mood, how im feeling down and stressed. We leave and im able to talk about it for a bit with her, I go with her to the gym building but ultimately decide im not coming in, Im not feeling it. I leave, as I leave tho, I get a text from Canary friend (plurinational's best friend) asking how things were with GG blonde, since I had updated her last week on everything, but for me it was obvious plurinational wanted to know if something had gone down with him, im annoyed at this, am I not allowed to feel bad for my academics? is this what im reduced into? liking a blonde?

I go my merry way, because of the delays it takes me around an hour to get home when usually it is 30 minutes including waiting time. I had a normal afternoon soon pretend a fast forward of my afternoon while I tell you this. I texted ring guy (I guy I was seeing back in the summer that sorta ghosted me but not really because we have each other on instagram?) because I noticed im hormonal at the moment (super horny and my facial hair is growing faster than usual) and he didn't text back, he hasn't to tis day (its Friday when I write this bit) so I started feeling a little insecure in general and I deleted the entire chat. I dont give it that much importance anyways.

We are going to watch wicked to the cinema, we have been trying to coordinate this for like two weeks now and im super annoyed from the beginning because somewhy im responsible to get the tickets and schedule everything and it makes no sense because plurinational and emo decide to insult me about this and even tho they are joking im a bit annoyed by this. I feel like im taking onto a responsibility that I dont have to so that everyone can have a good time and I just get shit for this. We are 20 minutes early for the movie, without counting the trailers, and I want to get snacks at this store that I really like, but no one wants to come with me so after I already led them to the cinema, and insisting for them to please come get snacks with me, I decide to just go get my snacks and being like fuck them. I talked about this with emo friend already amongst other situations I dont really want to touch on anymore because it will be brought up in other posts. but they weren't too happy about this.

Lastly and before I finally finish this post, during the movie I couldve sworn I saw GG blonde in the room, this blonde skinny tall guy with rings was sitting just across the stairs from me. This lead me onto a full on spiral. for two reasons:

was that how many fucking coincidences could we have, this had to be a fucking joke.

My friends were going to kill me if I said hi to him, it was gonna be tragic.

And after this point I realise how fucking asshole shit friends both emo and plurinational were, they made me feel guilty about how I felt, they undermined both mine and my therapists decisions and they were not supportive for me at all. They both created a hostile environment for me and my feelings, they created an environment where I felt punished for having feelings and being in a complex situation, they did not try to understand how I was feeling and on top of that they made me feel like I was guilty for them teaming up and distancing themselves from me because of this. And then again I feel so pressured and that im seen as non human to them, like im not allowed to have feelings, or a life outside of them. Like I have to be patient and supportive when they need something but when I AM for ONCE in a YEAR AND A HALF that we have known each other, I am the bad guy, I am a danger to my wellbeing and im stupid for doing what feels right. How are they even my friends?

On that same note, literally as I was finishing this last paragraph, emo friend opened my door unwarned, unnecessary to say I got terrified, but also I enjoy my alone time, im an only child, I like doing things on my own... anyways, lemme get onto my next post, so many things to say.

hello my gorgeous readers (my therapist), its almost 1am on a Monday and ive got to wake up tomorrow however ive had you abandoned over the weekend and I feel like I have so much to write from the weekend, this is a week full of stress and I just want to start it with a clean slate when it comes to events in my life. This was a long weekend since Friday was festive so I have extra info, this might take a few blogs hehe. I am currently listening to memories..do not open by the chainsmokers, which is probably something I would've listened back in my original posts back in 2020.

Thursday

This was a super long day, I went to therapy and got lost in my way there since I had to go to another clinic that's not the one I usually go to. I feel like it went quite well, it turns out my therapist actually reads my posts which is impressive since I wrote a lot here in the last few weeks, im not seeing her until after finals so ig our next session will be packed. It was a good sesh tho, I updated her on everything and her response was quite positive, we were able to also talk about my relationship with my body and food and ive got to say im on a very good stage of it, I will never be fully recovered but thats just how I was wired and she also brought attention to the fact thats its an agenda being pushed at us all the time so how can I move on if its everywhere?

Anyways, I went climbing that afternoon with my friends, Cheesy friend's ex fling turned into friend (we will call her fellow country girl since we both come from the same country) started coming with us. My fellow country girl is super nice to me, we have a lot of fun together and she advices me on whatever she cans, she is super cool and hardworking and I like her, monkey friend doesn't like her that much tho, I do. We were playing tough in the climbing gym and I accidentally hit her head with something(?), cheesy friend brought this to my attention and I felt super bad, all of the sudden I was a little kid again hurting his friends while playing, I apologised to FCG and said I wouldn't do it again, she answered to keep doing it, that she liked to play tough because she grew up with like 4 brothers or something, I was astonished but it lightened the mood for me. It was a quick climbing sesh because cheesy friend and I were down for a boys night.

I ran home and got ready, put on my fancy coat because it wasn't any boys night, it was coat boys night since Cheesy friend had just gotten a new coat too. After a very funny incident hopping onto metros, me telling him he was on the wrong way and then him having to run across the station, we finally made it to the same train, and off to boys night. Boys night is something super fun that started one evening where we went to see a speed climbing competition and started bar hopping and just had such a good time the two of us and now we just try to do it as often as possible, this is just our second one but it ought to keep going. We accidentally got into a gay bar which was super funny to me because Cheesy friend is a 183cm straight 31yo next to a 19yo gay twink, he doesn't mind tho, he's been through worse when it comes to gay clubs, and honestly, so have I. we just had like a blast, I did the "wait, they dont love you like I love you" dance in the middle of the street and a girl saw us which amused cheesy friend for the rest of the night. We found this very cool bar that I will deffo be going back to, I took some pictures for this post actually(the purple lights with the screens). I feel like he didn't want to go to the last bar but he gave in because I wanted to, I feel a bit sad about that but he had a good time too, we always do. We visited 5 bars, thats a new record. We went our separate ways, I bought myself a burger and watched an episode of the end of the fucking world on Netflix before going to bed. I always watch it on my birthday but I didn't this year, so I owe it a watch.

Friday

I woke up super confused, I have hyperrealistic dreams when I drink and today was one of those days, I woke up unsure of if I had cancelled my plans for the day and thinking I had texted GG blonde, wasn't the case. I was able to remember everything from last night and neither of those things were real so idk what happened there. I had plans with my virtual friend turned into real life friend (lets call him virtual friend even tho we live in the same city now). He's one of the few people I talked to during the pandemic, we met on a Taylor swift community on the internet like 7 years ago and now we live in the same city. We went to a museum and I put on a cute aesthetic outfit and he took some pictures of me (I'll add one here), we talked about life and boys and pop culture and life. He came with me to do some Christmas shopping and soft launched our friendship with my mom. He was a bit upset I hadn't told my mom about this little friendship we have had going on for the last years, I guess I was always scared of my mom taking my phone away from me and then of her getting upset about me lying or hiding things, his mom knows about me tho, so im considering telling my mom soon.

Saturday

At this point I should’ve been studying already, however, I didn’t. I read like 3 slides of the presentation I had to study and moved on, I can’t truly remember what I did during the day, I had lunch? And went climbing? No, I had a very heavy lunch, then I went climbing with my friends and we went to a café, I had an alfajor and then was sort of falling asleep. I also bought a can of Arizona tea on the way there which made me very happy. I went home and took a nap, and I wanted to keep napping but I had to get ready because my friends from uni wanted to go to the supermarket? And I don’t want them to think(or notice) they’re the other friends so I have to accept, we ended up going to my favourite supermarket tho so that was fun, I had to leave early tho because I had a dinner party with Monkey friend and company. It was a cute little dinner party for a Colombian holiday where you turn on candles for the death and for your wishes. This is one of my favourite things about living in my current city, everything is sparkling with different cultures and traditions and it’s just awesome. I manifested money, I wished for a “blondie” as I’ve been wishing for for the last few years but never seems to happen for me, and I also set a candle for my late father, it’s so weird because now that I’m the furthest from home I’m the closest to commemorating him and remembering him and who he was and what he liked.

Anyways, here’s the deal when I go out with them and by now when I go out in general: I don’t drink or if I do I drink very little. I haven’t made a recap yet but there’s many reasons why I shouldn’t be allowed near alcohol. So I just enjoyed the night and the cats and the pizza and the company and went my merry way just drinking a few plastic cups of wine by the end of the night and trying a bit of this traditional schnapps and that was it. Monkey friend was really excited about going out and making out with someone, whilst equestrian friend mission was to get super drunk and god she did. Since we were going out I gave little side quests to everyone and they gave me a bunch and that was gonna be fun to do.

Night was progressing and I decided to have a bit of the wine I had brought, I was a little disappointed cause it was a nicer wine and it wasn’t all that good honestly, I also tried a bit of said schnapps but that was it for me. I urged the need to leave since it was getting late and if we wanted to find somewhere cool it would’ve been impossible if we took any longer. Cheesy friend and I took the elevator with equestrian friend, this is when we notice she’s not precisely sober, however at this point we think she just needs a little walk and some water, so while we’re carrying her I get her some water in the hopes she starts to feel better. We hop onto the metro and reach our station, this is when she says she is indeed not feeling well and decides she wants to go home, of course we all go with her. We just had to change metro lines so we did that and, I’ve got to say, I’ve got a fair bit of drunk stories both of me and friends of mine, I’m an alcoholic empath if you may, so I could tell by the face of this woman she is going to throw up. As we reach the following station (mind you it is a 30 minute metro ride back home) she lets us know she’s going to be sick, for me this is obvious. I step back as she gets up and cheesy and monkey help her get out, it is as she’s stepping off the wagon she projectile vomits onto monkey friend, I can tell this woman is having a bad night. I stay in awe but not for too long since I know the metro is going to close the door and keep going. We all get off and equestrian friend starts puking in the corner, and she keeps puking. We were well passed the time the last metro had left the origin station, we were in luck this line is super long and slow so we had some spare time, the next one passes and we are not ready to get in. The next one passes, we stay, that was the last one. We’re stranded 40 minutes away from home. At this point we have to take the night bus, this was usually a 15 minute walk from where we were. A guard lets us know it’s time to leave the station since they were closing, and we go off to this main avenue, we are able to walk a block down when she finds some bushes and starts puking there, I go get her a sandwich because at this point she’s not even puking, she’s just spitting. She’s claiming she’s about to die. These girls pass in a car and scream at us “you’ve got this girl, we’ve all been there!”, this creepy dude asks us if we need anything cause he lived right there, my friends say he invited us in, for me he just asked if we needed anything he could provide for us. Mind you we spent around an hour in this situation. This is where I start spiralling, I’m thinking of gg blonde and what he was probably doing(sleeping tbf) and about how gorgeous he was (I feel stupid writing this now cause these feelings feel so distant now). So I was panicking while equestrian friend was throwing up and I decide it’s time for us to move on, she’s not progressing and it’s late and cold and we all want to get home. So we decide we will not take the night bus but an uber, however that it is a good idea to start walking in to direction to the bus and following its route since it’s basically all the way through another main avenue and we basically live on it so it’s our best chance to get her to sober up before putting her inside of a vehicle. As we’re walking im trying to feed her but she can’t swallow, I notice she’s about to run out of water so I rush to a subway I knew was on the area to get her some hydrating drinks, we go past some super posh clubs and all I can think of is how cool would’ve been to grow up rich in this city, it just would’ve been the coolest thing ever. Monkey asks me if I can get equestrian some electrolytes for the next morning, so when they hop onto the taxi I take the bus so I can get down at the 24h pharmacy near my place, pick up a something that cheesy can wear to sleep cause ofc he would be staying over at the girls’, and this is when I notice I have their keys, and monkey told me they only brought one set of keys tonight, so now I’m panicking because I am…

#shitpost #random thoughts #diary #random shit #piece of life

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letluigisaythefword · 3 years ago

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im going to Cry i just got thrown into in lava on the server i play on with. everything important i own on me

i am going to commit so much murder on hoglins i was just getting decent items w/enchants and shit

#minecraft #literally so fucking.aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #im ngl i did baby rage and just stop playing for the night #but its also 4am so im not gonna hold that against myself

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cowb0ycrime · 4 years ago

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me: human!cas is definitely my favourite. he's so soft and funny and I just want to hug him.

me having to watch his fucking human arc storyline knowing Misha was actually homeless in real life:

#spn #ooooh i just #i fucking am seething with rage #wym it took the winchesters DAYS to be like #oh maybe we should go get him #and then APRIL-#my boy #was fuckin ASSAULTED #and then straight up KILLED #AND THEN KICKED OUT OF THR BUNKER!!!!!!#MY MAN GOES THRU IT #LET ME HUG HIM MY GOD #IM SO HEATED #ITS 4AM #ooooooh #seething #tags #castiel

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mischiefmanaged687 · 5 years ago

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blackberry-bamblz · 2 years ago

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this save is also just an empires/hermitcraft/traffic life crossover that i've been working on here's some other important notes. its mostly empires rn because im slowly working on moving the other sims in but a lot has happened

the dogs live directly across from empires!false, who also lives right next to empires s1 fwhip. she's having a great time

When i first moved empires s2 joel into the neighborhood he immediately set his kitchen on fire and after it was put out he continued making his grilled cheese like nothing was wrong and it was normal quality. he sat down covered in soot to eat it too

empires s2 jimmy has been abducted by aliens twice. none of the other 30+ sims i've moved in so far have been abducted by aliens while playing them. i have no fucking clue why. gem *almost* got abducted but the action cancelled itself before she got outside and i dont know why?? out of everyone it would be jimmy this would happen to

Speaking of empires s2 jimmy and joel while i wasnt playing them the game decided that they would dislike each other and i found it very funny

i made empires s1 lizzie a mermaid and twice now i've looked away to pay attention to another sim in her household only to come back confused as to why she's uncomfortable and in those 5 minutes i was away she wandered out into the ocean and now its 4am and she's complaining because its cold out and she has to pee. mrs ocean queen this is your own damn fault

note to self if you give werewolf sims the perk that lets them pee wherever and their rage meter fills they can and will pee in the same spot 5 consecutive times. ren what the fuck.

gave s2 fwhip the law career (because of the whole lawyer thing) and since he's a kleptomaniac he's stolen twice from work so far and both times i've opened up the household inventory to check what it was and both times it's been a singular dirty plate

btw i've been hyperfixating on the sims 4 since ive been able to pirate every single DLC and for some reason my sims save has generated an entire household that nothing but dogs and moved them into the vampire neighborhood and tbh good for them. like idk how this even happens but im happy for them living their best dog lives

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speigel · 4 years ago

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Id say fuck my neighbor but they're fucking so loudly im actually crying

#its fucking 4am #i just listened to a man scream and im full p rage #so much rage #but they also sound ridiculous #im fucking ajshdjdjwjxe #never have sex yall its too embarrassing #im so embarrassed!!! ew !!! why theu doing that!!!

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dramaqueeenamby · 4 years ago

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Waves: The Read

A/N: I am a shady bitch, and I regret nothing. Also, if ya’ll remember, Mercedes is Summer’s publicist/manager. I mentioned that in a few waves, so don’t get confused, friends!

Warnings: None.

Word Count: 2K

Masterlist

TAGS: @notacamelthatsmywife @babe-im-bi @liquorlaughslove @letsshamelessqueen-m @missyperle @valkryienymph @tashawar @mani-lifes @missdforever @hello-therree @toni9 @queenshikongo3

"How many solos has my sister had?"

The room grew quiet, all eyes on the speaker. They’d just finished a number, or rather, Finn and Rachel had just finished a number. The rest of the students served more as props than singers. Ad-libs only constituted so much.

Mr. Schue’s smile dimmed. Slightly. "W—what?"

Alexus shrugged, motioning around the room. "Or any of the kids whose names aren’t Flipper or Rachel?"

"It’s Finn."

"I don’t care," she dismissed, eyes still on the instructor. "I’ve been here a whole week, and not once have I seen someone other than Cher and Sonny score solos."

Mr. Schue scoffed, crossing his arms. "Now, hold on a second, I treat all my students fairly. Any student is allowed to audition for a solo—"

"And how many who have auditioned actually received one, other than your prized pupils?"

Mercedes stood up. "Alexus—"

"No." Alexus lifted her hand and looked over at her sister. "This isn’t right, and you’re too kind and understanding to say anything, so I will."

"You’re out of line, Alexus."

She laughed, looking back at him. "Out of line? I’m not one of your little students, and you’re not going to shut me down like you do them. I’m going to say what I want and need to say, and then I’ll leave, but you’re going to catch this read, first."

"And, cut!"

Summer broke from character and offered Matthew a fake smile before turning away and catching Amber’s gaze. They shared an unspoken exchange, one that caused Amber to laugh after Summer rolled her eyes.

Summer didn’t know why she was so weary about accepting this role. Only 10% of it was acting, the rest was her actually reading the problematic cast members, which was all but a handful. But, to fulfill her petty side and get paid?

It was a double win.

Summer noticed Ryan was speaking with Lea, which ignited another eye roll. She was the guest star, not that Barbara Streisand wannabe. Still, Summer counted her blessings, because she could only take Ryan in small doses. He wasn’t as bad as his prized actress, but it was the fact that he allowed her to treat everyone like shit that made her think less of him.

Perhaps she was spoiled in the sense that every other director she’d had the privilege of working for would never tolerate such behavior. She had to accept that Hollywood was a game, and the rules changed constantly.

"Someone was having fun," Mercedes, Summer’s assistant chimed, coming to walk beside her.

Summer feigned innocence. "I have no idea what you’re talking about."

Mercedes smirked. "Yeah, right. You weren’t acting. You were giving them all a piece of your mind."

Summer retained her smile as they reached her trailer, Summer opening the door so Mercedes could enter first. "Are you trying to insinuate that I was using my job to tell these people how I really feel?"

"I surely was."

As soon as the door closed, Summer confessed. "You know me so well."

The two laughed. "Girl, you know Lea is probably complaining to Ryan right now."

Summer sucked her teeth. "You know she is." Walking over to the kitchenette area, she turned on the Keruig and opened the drawer to select a pod. Her hand ghosted between the caramel and the dark magic, before she settled for caramel. "That black bitch—"

Mercedes snickered. "You sound just like her."

Summer frowned as she insert the pod and selected 8oz. "God, you’re right. I have to have to get out of here."

Smiling, Mercedes swiped down to refresh her emails. "Hey, look at it this way, you keep up this level of performance, and you’re a shoe-in for that Primetime Emmy.

The idea of adding another award to her resume was more than enough to keep Summer focused and dedicated. As a dark skinned black woman, she had to work ten times harder just to remain 20 steps behind. Anything she could do to push herself, she cherished.

Summer added creamer and sugar to her coffee, blowing before taking a sip. "After this, I need a quick break."

Mercedes hummed. "Umm, about that—"

"No."

"Summer—"

"No, Cedes, I’ve been working back to back since I scored 4AM, I think I’ve earned a little vacation time."

"I don’t disagree." Mercedes raised her hands in surrender.

"Thank you," Summer nodded, taking another sip of her coffee.

"But—"

"Here you go."

"I’m just saying, I’m hearing rumors about a potential role that’s gonna start casting in a couple of months."

Summer rolled her eyes and brought the mug to her mouth. "And?"

"And." Mercedes also rolled her eyes. "It’d be perfect for you."

"Mmmhmm."

"Summer," Mercedes lowered her voice. "It’s Storm."

Summer narrowed her eyes. "Storm?" Mercedes nodded. "You don’t mean—"

"X-Men Storm? I surely do."

Summer gasped and covered her mouth. "Bitch!"

"I know!" Mercedes giggled, shushing her client. "So do you see why I want you to keep your options open?"

Summer downed the remainder of her coffee and washed her mug in the sink all the while still stuck on the information she’d been told. "Do you really think I could be Storm?"

"Summer, please, you won an Oscar for your first Hollywood role. You’re a shoe-in."

"What about Shipp?"

"Shipp can skip her ass off somewhere."

The two women laughed when a knock on the trailer door prompted Summer to walk over, opening and smiling when she saw Amber. "Hey girl, come on in."

"I wish." Amber rolled her eyes. "Lea’s ready to start filming again. I mean, Ryan is ready to start filming again."

"You’ve got to be kidding me." Summer checked the watch on her wrist. "It hasn’t even been twenty minutes."

Amber sighed. "You know the saying. She says jump. We say—"

"Trip, bitch."

Amber laughed, as Summer looked back at Mercedes, pointing a finger. "This conversation isn’t over."

Mercedes winked at Summer, the two actresses sauntering back onto set.

Summer wondered if Lea had been listening outside her trailer, because it seemed as if Ms. Michele was purposely antagonizing Summer. Any scenes they had together, Lea would abruptly call cut and give Summer "pointers," all the while Ryan sat in his chair and said nothing.

Summer, forever the professional, managed to keep her composure, but there was only so much she could take.

Finally, when it came time for Summer to film her final scene, she saw an opportunity.

"Alright, and action!"

"I just want you to know that despite your distasteful behavior toward me, I hold no animosity and hope that one day you can release your unwarranted rage, and we can be cordial once I’m on Broadway."

Alexus turned to Rachel and tilted her head, crossing her arms. "I don’t like you. Never have, never will."

Rachel’s smile faltered. "Well, I-I’m sorry you feel that way, but--."

"Let me explain something to you, Berry. This is Lima, Ohio. The biggest thing we have going for us here is Breadstix, a restaurant chain that’s been on it’s last leg since that lawsuit filed by the kid who got two breadsticks stuck up her nostrils."

"I’m much better now."

Alexus ignored Britany and continued. "So, I’ll give you this, this small town notoriety and fame, because I know and you know, that once you actually make it out into the real world, reality is going to slap you so hard, you won’t need to have a nose job."

"Alexus—"

"Your stardom is limited to this pathetic town and its almost entirely pathetic population. And don’t get me wrong, you’re very good at manipulating and controlling individuals, because you can. For now. But, let’s be real, your voice isn’t anything I haven’t heard coming from street singers in NYC. Face it, you don’t have the talent nor the looks to make it into this big star you think you’re going to be. NYADA?" Alexus laughed. "Maybe you’ll make it, I doubt it, and even if you do, once you realize how utterly mediocre your narcissistic ass truly is compared to real talent, you’ll come crying back to Lima and spend the rest of your life working nights at Breadstix while watching reruns of Funny Girl on a goodwill VHS player." A beat. "Now, how’s that for raining on your parade?"

"And, cut!"

——

PRESENT TIME

"Christopher, stop!" Summer laughed as Chris came from behind and lifted her up against his solid frame. "I’m trying to do my makeup."

"You don’t need it," he murmured into her neck. "It’s going to end up all over the pillows anyw—"

"Sir!"

"Autumn."

"Would you please leave me alone?" Summer managed to wiggle herself free from her husband, flipping him off when he slapped her ass. "I am a human being."

"Allegedly."

"Alleged—lemme stop before I end up going to jail." She leaned over and examined her skin, feeling for the tackiness to see if her primer had settled. "This is why I can never do my makeup right. If it’s not him, it’s the twins."

We wanna see the babies!

I don’t get it. Why is she always so mean to him???

^^^^You must be new around here…

What makeup do you use?

Summer caught the last comment and grabbed her foundation and concealer, flashing them on the camera. "You know I have to support my girl, Ri. It’s Fenty Beauty all day everyday over here, ya’ll."

More comments came rolling in, Summer partially paying attention while she tried to do her makeup. Chris was taking her out on a date, the first they’d been on since the birth of the twins.

Summer was actually excited. She was in much need of alone time with her husband.

She grabbed the Snap shadow and blending brush when she noticed majority of the comments kept mentioning Lea Michele.

She didn’t even attempt to hide her distaste. "Why are ya’ll asking me about that girl? Did something happen?" Different stories were coming in prompting Summer to do her own research. "Baby, can I see your phone?"

Without hesitation, Christopher jogged into the bathroom, grabbing onto Summer’s hips while she typed Lea’s name into google.

Five minutes into reading, Summer slammed his phone onto the counter.

"Finally!"

"You’re paying for that," Chris muttered, grabbing his phone, thankful that it wasn’t cracked.

"Sorry, baby." She leaned up and kissed his cheek before looking into her phone. "Ya’ll, okay, most of you should remember I played Mercedes sister, Alexus, on Glee, right?" A wave of "yes" rolled in. "So, I’ve worked with the bitch, and I am not exaggerating when I say bitch. That heifer is literally the worst person I have ever had the displeasure of working with."

Summer pushed Christopher out the bathroom, in case her adding onto the Lea Michele drag train somehow ended up bad. "Now, I’d heard she was a nightmare, but I like to give everyone the benefit of the doubt."

"But, literally the first time I walked onto set and introduced myself to her, she looked me up and down, turned up her nose, and walked away." Summer clapped and covered her mouth. "It took everything in me not to call her ass out, but it was my first day, and I didn’t want to cause a scene."

"Obviously, I was a recurring star on the show so I would make appearances throughout the series, and each time I was there, she treated me, and everyone around her, like trash."

"Okay, but here’s the real tea, you know that read Alexus gave Rachel in season 3? That wasn’t in the script." Summer laughed at the comments. Her fans were freaking out. "My line ended when I told her I didn’t like her or something, but it was my last day of filming, and I’d literally had enough of her."

Even more comments came rolling in of laughing, frog, and tea emojis. Summer sucked her teeth and placed her hand on her hip. "Ya’ll, her white ass thought she was gone’ be a thirty something Maria from West Side Story on broadway." A beat. "Somebody had to let her know!"

#chris hemsworth #chris hemsworth fanfiction #chris hemsworth fanfic #chris hemsworth x black!reader #chris hemsworth x reader #chris hemsworth x black!oc #fic: waves

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tantibusromance · 7 years ago

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#its 4am and i cant sleep #so here's some more music from my favorite artist #im seriously considering just getting out of bed to play video games rn #but if i do ima prob log into for honor but then i'll start raging #and prob wake my roommate 🙄#i shall lay here for now until i get sick of it and decide to get up #early morning rise i guess #mymind #atlas #tantibusromance #eulogy #soundcloud #fave music

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rubadubdub3nunsinatub · 3 years ago

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you ever just rage quit a family get away at 3am? am now im home but so worked up i gotta wait for the panadol to kick before i sleep and its nearly 4am and its only a few hours before they start looking for me. then i have to explain i left because i was literally screaming and kicking around because of the sleeping conditions?

#yikes #im not having a good time right now #cried while driving the entire way wow

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swamp-world · 3 years ago

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anyways. if... (1968). how to talk about it. tired ramblings below the cut. again, big TWs for a lot of stuff.

im slowly in the process of rewatching it because i just havent had the time lately. it just...strikes me as such a strange film for what it is. i dont remember much, frankly. i remember the general idea, the general vibe, i think there was a lot i was too young to understand the first watch.

the first thing that comes to mind in this film is the idea of the school shooting. they didnt call it such, no, but that’s what we would call it today. as a film made in 1968, it’s morbid and horrendous that they created an event in an overdramatized film, clearly meant to be divorced from reality, clearly satirical in every way, and that by the end of the century, Columbine would happen, and within the 21st century, school shootings became a regular event in america. a cursory search shows that there certainly were instances of school violence before this (a man shot a student in a dorm; a principal shot colleagues, etc.) but none so sensationalized or arguably senseless as those in Brenda Spencer, as Columbine.

and that’s where this film walks a tightrope. there are multiple ways to see the film and all of them are true in at least part.

1. many will recognize malcolm mcdowell from his role in A Clockwork Orange. many will recognize that as a film that white american men tend to look to aspirationally instead of with horror, as it was designed. same vein as the matrix, fight club, the joker, etc. this movie is where he got a lot of his character inspiration from. and there’s definitely that same idea of the disillusioned loner who, if given a gun, can make enough of a revolutionary difference in a world that has wronged him

2. is this supposed to be a good thing? the film seems conflicted itself at times. the teachers are in the wrong, certainly. oh, that’s without question. it doens’t paint the violence as aspirational, i dont think. i do think that there’s this idea of a fictionalized, sensationalized and glorified revolution, fighting back against the school system and society

3. this was part of a “series” that was satirizing british school, healthcare, and capiatlism. make of that what you will.

4. it predates monty python as well but absolutely demonstrates much of the same humouor and influence and aims. i can’t explain the surrealness of it.

5. the disillusioned students aren’t disillusioned for no reason. the school system strips them of their character, reduces them to family names and no personality, turns a blind eye to abuse at the level of peers, encourages harmful hierarchies within the student body that involve active abuse and corporal punishment, and aims to produce machines instead of people. this is an understandable reason to be upset. it’s something we still grapple with today.

6. the context of the school shooting in the film absolutely must, for my intentions here, be separated as much as possible from our modern conception of the school shooting. the ones that we encounter in the modern world are certainly a product of the issues that the film brings up, but i want to do my best to look at it in its own time, as much as i am able to with my limited knowledge

7. the modern school shooter tends to be a “lone-wolf” domestic terrorist, and i will not hesitate to call them such. they tend to be incels, white, straight, young men who perceive themselves as being rejected by women, or who are motivated by alt-right and fascistic beliefs and goals. these are acts meant to inspire terror in those populations. i would certainly classify these as hate crimes, since that’s their primary motivation. in If... on the other hand, they are very clearly attacking the system of british education itself and the people who perpetuate it. (in a lot of situations, this isn’t inherently much different from the way that a lot of modern school shooters see themselves: important to consider.) rather than being violence deliberately directed at the students, it’s specifically on Speech Day, where parents, administration, faculty, etc. are all present. These are the people in power; these are the ones who send their children to these schools, who fund them, who run them, who allow, encourage, and enact the violence. it is not an aimless violence, nor is it a hate-motivated violence.

8. the shooting in the film is meant to be farcical and satirical. who would have imagined, in 1968, that this scene, meant to be the pinnacle of overdramatized and hyperviolent revolution in a satirical manner, not meant remotely to approach reality, would become something that people avoid watching because it has in fact happened to them? in 1968, who would have predicted Brenda Spencer, Columbine, Stoneman Douglas, Sandy Hook, Virginia Tech? there was one significant school shooting in 1966, in Austin, that killed 28 and was the deadliest mass shooting for 18 years. but, and while this doesn’t diminish the violence, i want to emphasize that that took place at a university in america, not at a boarding school in england. the fundamental difference between the concept of adults, former military, gunning down 28 people; and a set of schoolchildren taking over the boarding school’s armoury and shooting at the headmaster, having been taught how to shoot those very guns on that very schoolground, is an extreme difference.

9. so, the shooting is designed to be an act of violence, targeting a system that the film paints as being actively harmful and deserving of a takedown, using the very weapons that the school taught them to use but never anticipated to have turned on them, and created in a farcical light: the idea that “this won’t happen, it’s too outrageous to be real”.

10. how do we take this these days? it seems, in many ways, like very little has changed. oh, corporal punishment isn’t practiced (or at least, not sanctioned, but certainly practiced). students are still molded to machine standard on the basis of class and aspirations spoon-fed to them by their parents. there’s still a significant divide between the working class and the capitalist class. there’s still rage simmering at the way that students have been abused by their schools. the violence that was seen as being overexaggerated at the time became a reality for a completely different set of revolutionary reasons, and the film balances the same tightrope as the matrix, as fight club, etc., between being commentary and satire that violent men will mark as aspirational and true rather than satirical and a warning

11. (that’s not to touch on the misogyny of the film)

this is apparently voted one of the best british films of all time, but that doesn’t mean much a lot of the time. it being a best voted doesn’t mean it’s popular or common or well known among people outside of britain, or outside of that generation; it doesn’t mean it was understood and received as intended.

the other thing i want to bring up about the film is the question of reality. the whole thing is so surreal and strange that the line between reality and imagination begins to blur regularly, but particularly near the end. there’s the question of whether this shooting actually happened in the film, or whether it was merely a twisted fantasy of mcdowell’s character. frankly, i would say that it doesn’t matter if it’s real, according to the movie or not. it genuinely doesn’t. this is what we as the audience see, and the intent is the same: either the boy is so driven to this violence that he actually does it, or he’s so driven to it that he fantasizes vividly about doing it. the point of it is still the same. it isn’t our job to know reality from fantasy; it’s possible that if it’s made up, the character himself isn’t aware of that. of course the film won’t make sense, it’ll be muddled and confusing and unrealistic, it’s satire and meant to bend the rules of reality to make a point. (those rules of reality included: schoolchildren do not use semiautomatic weaponry on their own schools. except for in texas, it does not happen.)

so what’s this to do with dark academia? let me answer that when it’s not 4am.

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