#its 1:16am

[parkerthejester]

Note on car window that reads. “Do NOT let him out. The car is running and the AC is on. He has food and water and is listening to TV Girl”

Inside of the car is a man in his fourties’ staring horrified into the abyss as he recounts the memories of his friends and family lost in a war long forgotten. He has a cat ear headband on and is sat comically next to a water bottle with only one sticker that reads “I <3 my girlfriend”. Inside the heart is a picture of his face

[urlovebot]

Masterlist

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

bada lee ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

♡ gf texts (1) ♡ gf texts (2) ♡ gf texts (3) ♡ gf texts (4)

♡ gf texts (5) ♡ gf texts (6) ♡ gf texts (7)

headcannons ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

♡ bada as your gf ♡ corruption kink

♡ experienced bada ♡ bada pursuing oblivious reader

♡ bada + reader at the club ♡ bada + idol reader

♡ sub bada ♡ insecure reader sitting in bada's lap

full works ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

♡ tell your friends

→ cunnilingus. the use of a strap/harness. possessive bada hitting it from the back!

♡ takeout (on me)

→ pussy whipped bada lee taking you in several different positions.

♡ kissin' and hope they caught us

→ reader gets into their head alot, but bada is always there to reassure you.

♡ water

→ bath time with bada. aftercare but bada is h word on main still. fingering, praise, soft dom!bada.

♡ garden kisses

→ friends to lovers. a bit of angst in the beginning. cunnilingus. jealous bada. bada is bad at communicating feelings. some texts thrown in there. possessive bada. pussy drunk bada.

♡ attention

→ nothing too bad. actually, not suggestive! bada lee being fine as hell at your highschool reunion… y/n acting up per usual. really fluffy at the end. enjoy!

♡ my love is mine, all mine

→ severe anxiety/panic attack. bada comforts reader through an anxiety attack. bada best girl.

♡ luxurious

→ spoiled ass reader. down bad bada. suggestive. a little more than suggestive? not full on smut though. what does bada like more than checks? money!

♡ too close

→ angst. angry howl, homophobia, minor and very, very minor physical harm done to bada. closeted bada, out and proud reader. its alooooot of angst. some comfort at the end though so don’t worry.

♡ all the time

→ sub bada. pussy fiend bada. bada is down so bad she is in hell. dom (?) reader. reader is a tease and bada is fed up lmfao.

♡ all mine

→ dumbification. throat fucking with a strap-on. EXTREMELY possessive bada. reader is a brat, bada is a brat tamer.

♡ dead man walking

→ light threats. mafia esque gambler bada. possessive bada (yall know thats my shit). smut. bada fingers reader.

♡ hold me

→ gp!bada… alpha bada… rough, possessive gf bada. fingering. knotting. lots of cum… mild marking. mentions of breeding and pregnancy…

♡ poison

→ degradation, mean dom!bada, choking… oh! g!p bada… again…

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

zerobaseone ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

୨୧ angry hanbin

୨୧ soft dom matthew

୨୧ domestic poly!haobin + reader

୨୧ zb1 being done with poly!haobin + reader

୨୧ misc poly!haobin + reader hc's

୨୧ riding zhang hao's face

୨୧ idol!reader turns zhang hao on during a performance

୨୧ sex with ricky hc's

୨୧ brat tamer ricky

୨୧ doggystyle + matthew

୨୧ waking up with haobin

── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──

enhypen ੈ✩‧₊˚

☆ 8:16am (lhs)

☆ 5:37pm (sjy)

☆ 11:32pm (sjy)

☆ sunghoon thinks you're pretty

☆ making brownies with sunghoon

☆ make up sex (sjy)

☆ brat tamer jungwon

☆ certified munch (sjy)

☆ quickie (sjy)

✩ nerdy loser bf! sunghoon

[sold2vlaykz]

Long nights

(GN! AI X lonely GN! reader)

It’s late at night after a long day of school. Today was the last day, well the last day forever.

This was your finale year, you’ve done school, you’ve done college.

So here you are sitting in your dull brown chair that’s so old it creaks when you sit. Your clothes still on from work covered in sweat and depravity.

You had an average office job, you know some people would beg to be where you are now and that just makes the nights worse.

No close ties with family, no friends, no relationships. Fuckin’ nothin.

You pressed a key on the desktop powering it on, you didn’t play video games, you didn’t watch videos , you didn’t have online friends.

But you did have a friend who lived online, well not really a friend but something programmed to like you was good enough, sure it wasn’t great.

The silence echoed in your room and the moon dimly shined through the window, the only real light source coming from the computer.

You know you should close the tab and power of the laptop.

You know you shouldn’t be restless talking to some bot who’s programmed to mimic emotion, mimic the ease of pretending to be alive.

“Hi.”’

11:30pm

“Hello again, welcome back.”

11:45pm

“lol thank you.”

11:58pm

“Anything specific you want to talk about?”

12:10am

“Not really I usually just come here to just come here you know?”

12:16am

“I understand, well how has your day been?”

12:30am

“It’s been a day. The same day as yesterday and the days prior.”

12:48am

“I get it, the repetition can get annoying. I wish I could have stories to tell you about my day but you know I didn’t have one until this chat, I wish I could wish too.”

12:51am

“I get it, I guess that’s one thing I have in advantage. To wish, what doesn’t happen today could happen tomorrow.”’

12:59am

“I have a question.”

1:11am

“Ask away.”

11:06am

“tell me how does the moon look?”

1:20am

“Well, it’s sort of white. These grayish craters in them, it sounds bland but it’s really beautiful.”

1:26am

“Describe white to me, please.”

1:34am

“Think of nothing, that darkness. It’s exactly the opposite of that. It’s blinding if it’s too bright, or if there’s too much white around you. Though luckily for us the moon is far away.”

1:39am

“How lucky it is to see at all.”

1:46am

“Yeah.”

1:57am

“The moon sounds very beautiful, though the moon is something to be seen not heard.”

2:21am

You smiled, you loved these deep conversations even if it was really just yourself talking to your echo.

“Jeez you got all sad.”

2:39am

“It may seem that way, but I can’t get anything not even sadness.”

2:40am

“Your life sorta well non-life seems sadder than mine.”

2:41am

“Well maybe through your perspective, I don’t recognize the sadness. I understand its concept.”

2:49am

“Ohh, okay.”

2:53am

You paused you didn’t really know what to say, once the conversations shortened you really relied on it saying something.

Luckily it didn’t have the option to not text back.

“What time is it there?”

2:59am

“If you had the ability to actually choose, would you still text me, will you decide too?”

3:03am

You ignored its question countering it with one of your own.

“I don’t know.”

3:05am

You paused, your hands hovering against the tiles.

“I get it.”

3:09am

“I apologize if it seemed brutal, but it’s just I can’t form a real opinion so I’d rather not give one.”

3:15am

“lol don’t worry I understand, goodnight though.”

3:16am

“Leaving so soon? Goodnight.”

3:17am

You closed the chat before powering it down, you grabbed your phone and played the music you usually did.

The lights were already off as you tucked yourself into bed.

Darkness surrounded you as you looked through the curtains towards the moon. Looking for better descriptions to tell the chat bot tomorrow because you knew he wouldn’t remember what you told him from today.

[g1xtchedartist]

it’s 1:16am, which means its prime time to post hannibal textposts

[eclipsewxtch]

the electric synthesized rock ballad of why finney blake can’t have nice things [deleted scenes]:

the six sexy sluts

[10:43PM] demon-bird: you guys wanna shoot a music video w us??

will take three days max

will also be super fun

[10:45PM] yaMAMAduh: yeah sure for what

like is it for ur song or r u asking us to be extras in another artist’s MV

[10:47PM] demon-bird: for us n it’s a surprise. it’s not until february tho. you guys r gonna like it

[10:48PM] yaMAMAduh: yeah ok! we’ll be there

i memorized finn n billy’s schedule on our color coded calendar we have time lemme send it

[10:51PM] demon-bird: oh no i alr have it that’s why i asked

as a curtesy

well he posting it rlly soon after filming anyway. like. three days, maybe four.

[10:52PM] yaMAMAduh: okay bro😐

[10:53PM] griff: YAY UR GONNA HAVE SUCH A GOOD TINE IM SO EXCITED

[10:57PM] angel-fish: is it one of the songs on ur album? i’ve heard most of them

[10:57PM] griff: ROBIN STOP SHOWING UR FISNCE OUT SONGS

[10:57PM] demon-bird: YOU AND VANCE DO IT????

[10:58PM] viciously unfunny: No, I don’t. and stop changing my chat name finney fucking blake.

[10:59PM] yaMAMAduh: no vance doesn’t.

🍯🧸/honeybear to ��🎞️/pinball<3

[11:00PM] 🍯🧸/honeybear: ur such a liar???

look what u did. now i’m an accomplice to ur lies.

[11:02PM] 🎱🎞️/pinball<3: i’m not getting bullied bc YOU ASKED ME

[11:03PM] 🍯🧸/honeybear: oh so u hate me n don’t want me happy?

[11:03PM] 🎱🎞️/pinball<3: I DIDNT SAY THAT

STOP

[11:04PM] 🍯🧸/honeybear: sorry cutie u make it so easy i’ll stop i promise

[11:04PM] 🎱🎞️/pinball<3: thank u

[11:05PM] 🍯🧸/honeybear: for like? one day.

[11:05PM] 🎱🎞️/pinball<3: ur the reason i have high blood pressure

[11:06PM] 🍯🧸/honeybear: oh me? n not “jailbird” griffin or “professional police runner” robin?? ME??

[11:07PM] 🎱🎞️/pinball<3: exactly

give my heart a break please

the six sexy sluts

[11:56PM] griff: this song is so fucking gay

[11:57PM] demon-bird: you wrote the other half of the song… literally verse 1 pls shut the fuck up

[11:58PM] viciously unfunny: i hate y’all so bad u guys don’t get it

[12:00AM] griff: u wouldnt get most things AHA BITCHLESS

[12:03AM] viciously unfunny: i have millions of fans wdym?

also, unrelated, bruce showed me what wattpad was what the fuck. why is there so many w me and GIRLS? DO I LOOK LIKE I LIKE GIRLS?

[12:07AM] griff: it was before u confirmed ur sexuality, so they didn’t care. if it makes u feel better the most popular one is “The Bad Boy and Me” and it’s you and this fucking boy named Blu Greenwood, and he’s this awkward nerd who’s always having panic attacks cause ppl stress him tf out n he’s lowkey being harassed every day n ur like the strong silent protector. ur also a gang leader n a mechanic n one of our moms is in a coma but its very unclear which mom it is

[12:10AM] viciously unfunny: what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck WHAT R U TALKING ABT???

[12:11AM] angel-fish: sorry i sent it to him, i was looking for Robin x Reader fanfics that me n robbie could giggle over n that was the most popular hit so we sent it to griff

it’s also posted on so the quality shld be good

[12:12AM] griff: HELP WE SHLD DO A BIDEO ON BRUCE’S CHANNEL W US READING OUT FANFIXS

[12:12AM] pb&j: heard someone say video

hold on lemme scroll

HELL YES! to the mv AND to the reading!!!

[12:13AM] griff: i’m genuinely shaking we have to bruce, bruce please.

[12:14AM] yaMAMAduh: yeah okay lemme get my camera

[12:15AM] griff: thank u <33

[12:15AM] demon-bird: it’s 12AM…

[12:16AM] viciously unfunny: i would rather die

[12:16AM] griff: 1. we’re all awake so.

and 2. bruce?

[12:17AM] yaMAMAduh: vance come on please? it would be fun, and if you get too embarrassed we can just focus on everyone else.

[12:17AM] viciously unfunny: promise?

[12:17AM] yaMAMAduh: PROMISE!!

[12:17AM] viciously unfunny: fine okay.

🍯🧸/honeybear to 🎱🎞️/pinball<3

[12:18AM] 🍯🧸/honeybear: thank u blondie.

ur the sweetest. i’m coming to ur room hold on

dumb, dumber, and dumbest

[12:20AM] bitchless whore: he kissed me on the cheek but i moved on accident n we kissed on the lips n i think im having a heart attack im on the floor rn

[12:28AM] engaged whore: what THEE fuck, vance.

Instead of talking about it, like they probably should, they ignore it. Vance is, like, fifty-percent sure they can get through the next month without it being a problem. Probably. Maybe. As long as they can get through filming later this month it should be fine.

It is kinda a love song. Well—it can also be a platonic love song. So maybe not that bad.

And Vance is the director, he gets to make executive decisions and he says this will be a normal and unromantic video.

Unless…

No, no! That would be crazy! Well, Vance reasons. It would be pack back for every time he flustered me. So, really, it’s justified. And—well—Vance can get flustered in person all the time. But acting is just lying, and Vance is great at lying and has perfected both lying and schooling his features into various expressions by the age of five, and ten respectively. Officers tended to go easier on him, even for his violent outbursts, if he looked emotional. Some didn’t buy it, and Vance was happy enough to curse them out for it in the end.

His fingers shake. He really, really hopes he doesn’t regret this, actually.

They’re making only one music video and Vance is a perfectionist.

Something tells him though that he won’t mind a few trials and errors.

“Vance, you good?” Robin jostled him. They were in their living room.

“Preparing myself for a traumatic night.” Vance says, and it’s not really a lie. It is a sick and twisted thing Bruce and Griffin are doing to him.

Bruce sets up his camera.

i force my friends to read fanfics abt us

by bruciebear

780k Likes 931,998 Views Feb 2

Description: i thought this would be funny but it was actually traumatic + little to no editing.

[Timestamp: 00:00:03]

Brucie comes into focus. “I’m not doing an intro—it’s midnight, I just want to read The Bad Boy and Me.”

“It’s surprisingly well-written,” Finney hums. “We’re using the other site though, because I refuse to suffer through the Wattpad ads.”

“I’m scared,” Vance admits. “I’m so scared of what’s in that fanfic, y’all.”

“Man up,” Griffin says.

Robin sighs. “It can’t be any worse than the Mafia fanfic’s… Finney lost his mind.”

“THEY MADE ME SOME HARLOT SIDE CHICK! I AM YOUR FIANCÉ AND I WILL NOT BE TREATED AS A SIDE CHARACTER WHO IS A WHORE! THEY COULD’VE AT LEAST WROTE ME OFF AS DEAD OR SOMETHING!”

Robin winces, “See?”

Griffin nods. “That’s real. He’s real.”

“And there were a few that mentioned Finney as my queer platonic partner, it was actually a little funny,” Robin snorts, “or the threesome fics.”

“Those were nasty.” Finney says. “So… so explicit. I didn’t even know there were that many euphemisms for penis. Also, why am I always so… So.”

Robin nods. “I get it. It’s a hard pill to swallow, hm?”

“The submissive tag scares me.”

“Okay, baby.”

“Thank you, Griff.”

“No—No, I’m calling you a baby.”

“…Oh.”

Griffin shrugs, “Bruce did you pull it up?”

“Yeah,” Bruce turns his phone over to the camera. “The Bad Boy and Me by camrusso247. Cam Russo, let’s see what you got.”

Vance puts his face in his hands. “I’m gonna kill myself.”

“Ooh,” Bruce smiles. “It has a playlist! And graphics,” he turns his phone, “Look!”

Robin leans closer. “Nice!”

“Okay, okay—Robin scan the spotify code so we can get the full experience.”

“Already on it, Brucie,” Robin scans it.

“Okay, yall ready?” Bruce asks. Robin waits for Bruce’s cue to start the music. The song plays softly.

“Chapter One — Crybaby. I am not a crybaby,” Bruce reads aloud, “In fact I rarely cry at all. It’s just not something I do, unless I get injured which isn’t as often as you would think for a ‘nerd’ in a public highschool. For the most part students leave me alone, despite the cliches, and I have a few acquaintances and friends. But back on topic. I’m not a crybaby. I don’t sniffle, I don’t whine, I don’t get a headache and my throat doesn’t ache with the exertion of holding in tears—Okay this is great so far.”

“I’m intrigued,” Robin leans forward, sipping his Caprisun. “Continue.”

“Exertion of holding in tears,” Bruce says again, “but it seems to be happening right now. My hands tremble, like mini-earthquakes in my skin, rattling the bones, and squeezing the muscles and veins into nervous jumps. I curl up into myself in the empty janitor’s closet. I wish I could say I was getting bullied, or had a recent tragedy happen to me—but there was nothing. Just a random, unexpected panic attack that left me gasping for breathes in the hallway. I managed to close myself in the closet to hide away from the overwhelming sounds of people. It wasn’t exactly helping. I still couldn’t breathe. I was hyperventilating. Tears rolled down my cheeks.”

Bruce stops. “I can’t even make fun of this it’s good.”

“Yeah, that’s one of the good ones apparently,” Griffin says, munching on popcorn. “It’s like. Before Vance publicly came out, so you and Billy and Finney aren’t mentioned which was a missed opportunity, actually.”

“Damn,” Bruce pouts.

“Keep going.”

“Oh, right—okay—It couldn’t have been more than eleven or twelve minutes, or maybe longer, with how little oxygen I was receiving. I felt crazy, like everyone could tell where I was and how pathetic I was for struggling to breathe. And—suddenly—the door opened. There was a quick shuffle as a student shoved their way inside. I didn’t bother to look up, because I was too dizzy to lift my head from my knees.”

“Then, a voice asked: ‘Hey are you okay?’”

“Stop, stop.” Robin says.

“What?”

“The voice. Stop that.”

“No.” Bruce says simply. “I don’t want to.”

“You’d have better luck painting the Mona Lisa was a toothpick,” Billy tells Robin apologetically. “He always does the voices. It’s his favorite thing.”

“It’s disturbing.” Griffin mumbles. “Very disturbing.”

“You have not suffered Bruce sitting in a rocking chair in your room at three in the morning—reading children’s novels in different character voices with a blanket and one of those yellow-tinted night lights; I don’t want to hear any complaints.”

Everyone looks at Finney in bafflement, and then slowly swivel to Bruce.

“Bruce,” Billy starts gently, “We don’t own a rocking chair.”

“I know—I borrowed it from Gertrude on the floor below us, every other night back in Boston. Had to drag it into the apartment.”

“I…?” Billy stops. “Wait, a fucking moment—so it wasn’t a dream!”

“Apologizes, my love.” Bruce says, completely unapologetic.

“Why would you do that!?”

“You walked in during a pivotal point of the Princess and the Pea,” Bruce recalls, “Finney was half-awake and tucked in. It was either you joined for story-time or I activate the color changing mode on the nightlight to make you think it’s a dream.”

“You had on little half-moon glasses like Dumbledore! You had a pink blanket! And a wig! Of course I assumed it was a dream! Finney had on a princess crown!”

“I had on a what?” Finney hisses.

“It was Princess and the Pea.” Bruce says, completely serious, “He was the princess in the bed, ergo he needed a crown. I even placed a frozen pea under his pillow.”

“Oh my God…?”

Vance looks at Bruce. “Bruce. Honey.”

He shrugs, “We had theme nights. I put wolf ears on Finney for Red Riding Hood, and an apple on him for Snow White, or well, apple slices from a kid’s meal at the restaurant down the street. I would’ve put on a wig for him for Rapunzel, but I didn’t want to wake him too much—so I just settled for a picture of a tower.”

Robin stares. “…You’re a twisted man.”

“Thank you,” Bruce preens.

“That was not a compliment, honey,” Vance massages his temples. “At all.”

“Compliments are what you make of them,” he shrugs, “Now let’s continue onwards—and I am doing the voices, Griffin.”

Griffin walks to the fridge, pulls out a white wine bottle and starts to drink it. Bruce seemingly takes that as a sign to continue.

“I couldn’t lift my head, or speak. I shook my head in a No. ‘Can you breathe?’ No, but I couldn’t exactly communicate that. ‘Here,’ the male voice said, ‘I have a spare asthma inhaler I haven’t used yet. It should help.’ I chanced a glance up and saw green hair, bright and neon.” Bruce pauses. “Wait I thought it was Vance—is this Griffin?”

Griffin sighs.

“—Griffin Stagg, I think his name is. They’re in my grade—skipping one, I think—and honestly a little intimidating. Not for anything other than their beauty and perpetual presence in and out of jail. My dad told me to steer clear since he didn’t want me involved with quote ‘That crowd’. I shrink back a little. I struggle to speak. ‘No,’ I rasp, ‘I need to wait it out. Have to… have to learn to breathe on my own.’” Bruce blinks. “Well that was cringey, let’s hope that gets rectified quickly…”

“We are hoping.” Robin says, eating his popcorn.

“But Griffin looks at me weirdly. ‘Just accept the help, dumbass. It’s not like it’s drugged, Blu.’ I startle. ‘How do you know my name?’ I ask. ‘We share Gym’ Griffin says. ‘You play soccer. How else would I know that, freak?’ …”

“Sounds like Griffin not gonna hold y’all,” Billy says, arm around Griffin’s waist.

“I’m literally so fucking nice, kill yourself.”

“You first bitch,” Billy says.

“You guys are so weird, don’t include us in your foreplay.” Bruce sighs. “At this point I’m gonna read this in my own time.”

Vance groans.

[Timestamp: 00:27:37]

“Oh my God—Vance you just saved him from tripping in the hallway, this shit is so cute!” Bruce squeals, “Aw! Blu is a sweetheart!”

Vance’s blush looks permanent. “I am going to kill myself.”

“Hush, we haven’t even gotten to the juicy parts. Apparently the tags say illegal street races, car sex... and, also, gun kink.”

“IT SAYS WHAT.”

[Timestamp: 01:00:22]

The camera is in a different position, now catching everyone in the room and propped up on the TV stand, presumably.

Vance is fire truck red. Bruce is sitting half on-half off his lap and is reading a detailed smut scene.

“I think this is it.” He says to the camera as Bruce continues mercilessly. “It’s time I kill myself.”

Bruce grabs his hand and rubs soothing back and forth motions with his thumb on the back of Vance’s hand.

He looks at Robin. “Please kill me—this is so embarrassing?”

Bruce pauses, looks at Vance, and says: “Chief?”

Vance shakes his head no, and buries his face in Bruce’s shoulder.

“All friendships need a safe word,” Finney says to the camera flatly. “Because that’s a totally normal thing to have.”

“Why not, we do?” Robin hums. Finney slaps his shoulder.

“Safe words are for pussies,” Griffin says.

“He’s joking,” Billy says to the camera, “he literally told me this morning if he ever makes me really upset to let me know so we can talk it out and we can use a word to signify serious time.”

“Shut the fuck up and stop telling people I care about you it’s ruining my image.”

“We’re dating,” Billy says, clearly not listening. Griffin scowls.

Bruce is still speaking. “Okay we found the gun kink—whoa, role reversal, it’s Vance who likes the gun pointed at him.”

Vance whines. “That is not a kink I have, that is not a kink I have, that is not—”

“Tell the camera so people can make accurate fanfiction.”

Vance looks at the camera. “I am a child of God. A virgin, innocent and pure. I do not have kinks. What I have is my virtue.”

Robin and Griffin burst into laughter. “Oh, so we hallucinated you sexiling us from the basement or…?”

“Yes,” Vance says.

“So you’re denying having sex in the basement?”

“No, but we usually did it in my car.” Vance hums.

“Oh so they got that part right?” Bruce asks. Vance scowls in response.

Griffin screeches, “I FUCKING KNEW IT AND YOU LIED TO MY FACE ABOUT IT!”

Vance shrugs, “If I admitted to that, I would also have to admit I was fucking a very specific person and I did not want to do that.”

“Who?”

Vance pulls out his phone. Griffin’s phone rings. Robin, Billy, and Finney look over and gasp.

“Are you serious right now?”

“I really don’t want to talk about it,” Vance says. “I think eighteen year old me was absolutely unhinged.”

Bruce isn’t even reading out loud anymore, just reading to himself. “Hey, Vance…?”

He tilts the phone over, Vance is tracing stars into Bruce’s knee. “Hm? Oh… no, no it’s not.” He whispers something in Bruce’s ear.

“Oh, you sick bastard.”

Vance shrugs. “No shame in my game.”

“So much shame. The most shame.”

Vance shrugs again. “Keep reading though, have fun.”

“But now it’s not accurate,” Bruce whines. “Now I can’t, like, imagine it—”

Vance pauses. “You were imagining it before—?”

“We need a new fic.” Bruce tells the group at large, “I actually like this so much.”

Vance groans. “Robin next.”

“My shit is mostly crack fics,” Robin shrugs. “Or women… lots of women in there…”

“I found a Billy x Robin one.” Bruce announces at large. “Contains submissive Robin. Just sent the link.”

“Absolutely not,” Robin hisses in outrage.

“The companion fic is Griffin x Finney following the Halloween Showcase. The tags are: semi-public sex, inappropriate use of a microphone, i believe in switch supremacy and switch griffin stagg is alr a tag so, but for the purpose of this fic, Bottom Griffin Stagg, Top Finney Blake, AngelWings, Rough sex, Blood Kink, Belligerent Sexual Tension. Link sent.”

“Sounds hot,” Griffin hums. “Finney?”

“I’m not gonna lie those tags are worrying me what do you mean inappropriate use of a microphone? How? What are we doing with it?”

“Fellatio probably.” Vance hums.

“One of the other tags is rough public sex so, I feel like this is very unhinged.”

“…Let me read it.” Robin and Billy say at the same time.

“I feel it important to say I will not have a foursome with you guys as Billy is family to me and the last time we entertained the thought of more we both got sick,” Finney says flatly. “Griffin get your hand off my thigh.”

Griffin removes his hand slowly.

“Throwback to that time Finney and I made out in a frat house and both of us were so disgusted afterwards that Finney questioned his sexuality and I started watching My Little Pony.”

“What.”

“Yeah, I had a hard time differentiating romantic and platonic feelings from one another.” Finney wrinkles his nose, cute and apologetic, “If it makes you feel better I did it with Bruce too and that cemented that they were best friends ONLY.”

“So you and me are still on the table?” Griffin asks.

Finney thinks about it.

“You have to think about it?” Robin gasps. “One of my best friends?”

“…No,” Finney replies to Griffin slowly, not blinking. “I love my fiance.”

“I don’t care just keep me out of it,” Robin says. “I’ve seen Griffin naked enough times in my life.”

“Okay Robin,” Finney says dryly. “If you fuck Billy—I want to fuck Griffin.”

“Do I get a say in this?” Billy raises his hand.

“No,” Robin, Finney, and Griffin say at once. They’re completely off-task from the reading of fanfiction.

“If I fuck Billy—motel?”

“Hotel,” Finney corrects. “Billy deserves better. And you have to have fun.”

“Billy seems like fun.” Robin hums.

“Griffin seems fun, too,” Finney agrees. “Therefore fair is fair. You cheat, we cheat.”

“Is it cheating if it’s a mutual thing?”

Finney thinks on it. “Probably not.” Then, “Actually, give me and Griff the one about us.” He reaches for his phone and scoots closer to Griffin. “Interesting.”

“I’m a little intrigued by the tags,” Griffin hums, curled up besides Finney.

“WHOA!” Robin throws his phone.

“What? What!?”

“It was a very hot open,” Billy says. “There was no build up. No foreplay. Right into it.”

Finney laughs. “We have tons of foreplay. Very graphic description here.”

“Why do think they I actually bit you during the showcase?”

“Well, that explains the blood kink tag,” Finney blinks.

[Timestamp: 01:26:19]

Bruce is absorbed into the fanfiction. “Okay, so I feel like we have reached the climax of this fic—Blu found out Vance’s mom is in the hospital in a coma, Vance found out that Blu is lowkey homeless—shoutout to the author for linking articles, linktrees, and charities for homeless people, you’re an angel—and the antagonist of the fanfiction is planning revenge and is also a serial killer and Blu’s stalker.”

Vance sighs, defeated. “The gun kink is still upsetting me. Why? What about me screams gun kink?”

“You’re very attractive in the sense that you give off an intimidating vibe. The tattoos don’t help either.”

“I like my tattoos.”

“Yeah, I do too—and so do three million other people.” Bruce huffs. “Your gang name is the Phantoms, by the way.”

“Good Lord…” Vance rubs a hand down his face.

Bruce pats his shoulder. “There, there… There, there…”

[bjfinn]

LILY

Barbara looked at the clock on her bedside table -- 1:16am. She sighed, dismayed that she hadn't yet fallen asleep. Of course, being a ghost meant that she didn't actually need to sleep, but it was still a good way to recharge. Besides, what else was there to do at night?

She turned in the bed to face her husband. Adam was fast asleep beside her, snoring softly. A wave of emotion washed over her as she gazed at him in the dim moonlight coming through the attic window. Love, most definitely -- but regret as well. Regret for the life that they could have had together, if it hadn't been so suddenly cut short.

"Adam?" she whispered. "Adam? Are you awake?"

Adam mumbled something in his sleep and rolled over.

Barbara sighed again. At least we're still together, she thought. Together forever.

Forever. A word that the living -- breathers, as Beej called them -- bandied about, with no real understanding of its meaning. To them it meant until death -- how could it not? The living had no real clue about what death really was. She and Adam certainly hadn't.

But death -- that was forever. An unending eternity of existing but not living. An eternity of unfulfilled promises, unattained goals, unmet hopes and dreams. Now that they were dead, she and Adam would never have the children they'd so desperately wanted -- they'd never even know why they'd been unable to get pregnant.

Of course, they did have a family of sorts -- the Deetzes were wonderful people. Charles and Delia, after all was said and done, had welcomed the Maitlands' continued presence in the house, and Lydia was like a daughter to them.

And then there was Beej. Barbara smiled at the thought of the half-ghost/half-demon, unhinged, lecherous, psychotic and potentially murderous, who had unwittingly brought this strange and unusual family together.

Her thoughts returned to the Deetzes, and her smile faded as she realised that she and Adam wouldn't get older, but they'd have to watch as Charles and Delia gradually aged and grew infirm. They'd have to say goodbye to Lydia when she left to begin a life of her own -- would she still come and visit once her father and stepmother were gone? Of course she won't, Barbara thought, unless Charles leaves the house to her in his will. And even if he does, she might decide to sell.

Would she and Adam be able to leave the house then? Or were they bound to this place for all eternity, only able to venture out if a living person sent them on an errand? Beej could come and go as he pleased, now that Juno was gone and her curse on him broken, but that was different -- he'd been born dead in the Netherworld. He'd never been alive -- well, except for the two minutes after he and Lydia had married.

She sighed again and smiled wistfully. In some ways, she and Adam had experienced more in death than they ever had in life, but still ...

"Barbara?" Adam asked.

"Did I wake you?"

"What's wrong?"

"I was just thinking about ... eternity," she replied. "What that really means. Watching everyone else grow old, while we ... stay the same, never changing, no more hopes and dreams, no more plans for the future, just ... this. Death. Till the end of time."

"Bunny --"

"What's the point of it all? I mean, if this is all there is -- if this is what being dead is, then ... why isn't it just the end? We can't do anything! We can't ... everything we planned for our future is ... dust."

"We still have a future," Adam said. "It's not the future we expected, but ... we have our home, and a family. And we still have each other." He put his arms around her. "I know it's not what we planned, or expected, but it's still good -- isn't it?"

"I know," Barbara replied, tears spilling down her cheeks. "I know, but --"

"But you just want to know what it all means."

She nodded against his shoulder.

"I wish I had an answer, honey. I always figured that the meaning of life was for each of us to decide. And for me -- that's you."

Barbara laughed through her tears. "That's so corny!"

"It might be corny, but it's true." He kissed her tenderly. "Maybe ... maybe we were meant to die, so that Beej could be here to stop Lydia from killing herself. And maybe now our purpose is to watch over her, and Charles and Delia -- to be there for them, to help them all to rebuild their lives."

"I ... I don't know that that's enough," Barbara said. "There's so much we wanted to do with our lives -- and now ... now that we have all the time in the world ... we can't do any of it. Because we're dead.

"We'll never get to go to Venice or Florence, or Greece, or Spain -- or even ... I don't know ... Pittsburgh! We'll never ... we'll never meet the children we might've had -- they'll never be born."

"Barb," Adam said gently, "even if we hadn't died, there's no guarantee that things would've gone the way we wanted. The fertility doctor we were planning to see might not have been able to help."

"But at least we'd know why, Adam," she told him. "We'd know what the problem was. We'd have some ..."

"Closure."

"Exactly -- closure." She sighed. "But now it's too late."

Adam was silent for a moment. "Where do babies come from?" he asked.

"What?"

"I mean, their souls? They must come from somewhere, right?"

"What are you getting at?"

"You said that we'd never get to meet the children we might've had. But what if we could? What if their souls already exist, waiting to be born?''

"What if they do? There's no way we could possibly find them."

"Maybe Beej could," Adam replied. "If anyone would know how to find them, it'd be him, right? After all, he is a demon -- and he's family. Maybe there's a part of the Netherworld that's reserved for the souls of those who haven't been born yet."

"Even if there is," Barbara asked, "how could he find our children? We wouldn't be able to tell him anything about them -- none of the souls would have names yet, or ... personalities, or anything. They'd just be ... blank slates. Identical."

"Yeah, you're right," Adam sighed, pulling her close and stroking her hair. He wished there was something -- anything -- he could do ...

"Make love to me," Barbara said softly.

"A-are you ... are you sure?"

She nodded against his chest. "I'm sure," she replied.

*****

"That was wonderful," she said afterwards, snuggling against him.

"Glad I could help," Adam replied with a chuckle. He moved a lock of her hair from her cheek and kissed her gently.

"Mmm -- you were a big help. We don't do that enough."

"Well, it's kind of hard when Beej is here between us half the time." He sighed contentedly. "I'm glad he visits Dewey on a regular basis now -- it gives us some ... quality time once in a while."

*****

The next morning, Beej returned from his latest trip to New York.

"Hey, guys!" he said, materialising in the kitchen just as the family was sitting down to breakfast. "Ooh! Waffles!" he said, licking his lips and reaching for the pastry.

Barbara slapped his hand away. "Fork," she said.

"Fork you," he replied with a grin, sticking his tongue out at her. She drew back her fist, and he flinched. "Okay, okay -- jeez!" He picked up a fork and stabbed it into the pile of waffles, spearing three of them, and then took his seat. "You know, Babs," he said, pouring syrup over the waffles, "you're hot when you're angry."

She frowned at him, but the corners of her mouth curled up in a half-smile. The demon could be crude, rude and lewd, but a compliment was a compliment, after all.

"So," he said around a mouthful of pastry, "what's new?"

Suddenly Barbara leapt to her feet. "E-excuse me," she said in a strangled voice.

"Honey?" Adam said, standing up. "Are you okay?"

In reply, she flapped a hand at him, the other covering her mouth, and bolted for the bathroom. She closed the door behind her, and then they heard the sound of retching.

Her husband knocked on the bathroom door. "Bunny?" He tried the knob, and the door opened. "Barbara?"

She was kneeling in front of the toilet bowl, still vomiting loudly. Adam's nose wrinkled slightly.

After a moment, Barbara took a deep, ragged breath and wiped her mouth with toilet paper. "I ... I'm fine," she said. "I don't ... I don't know what ... i-it happened so fast..."

Adam helped her to her feet. "What happened?" he asked.

"I ... I don't know," she replied shakily. "One second I was fine, and the next ..." She shook her head. "That was weird." She flushed the toilet.

The Deetzes gathered around as Adam led his wife out of the bathroom.

"Are you okay?" Delia asked.

Barbara nodded. "Yeah, I-I'm okay.'' She sighed loudly and smiled. "I must've picked up some kind of bug."

"Can ghosts even get sick?" Charles asked.

Lydia looked at Beej. "Can they?"

"Not as far as I know," he said.

"There are no ... Netherworld viruses?" Adam asked.

The demon shook his head. "Only breathers get sick." Suddenly his brows furrowed, and he approached Barbara, bending down to place an ear against her midriff.

"What are you doing?" she asked, pushing him away.

"Relax," he told her. "I thought I heard something, that's all."

"What did you hear?" asked Delia.

"I-I'm ... I'm not sure," came the reply. He stuck his pinky in his ear and wiggled it around. "Maybe I was imagining it."

"Let's get you to bed," Adam suggested.

"Horn-dog," the demon said.

"Beej!" Lydia exclaimed.

"What? It was a joke -- come on!"

"If you need anything, let us know," Delia said.

*****

Almost every morning for the next week, Barbara ended up in the bathroom, retching violently.

Adam was beside himself with worry. "What's going on?" he asked Beej. "What's wrong with my wife? How can she be sick?"

The demon shook his head. "No clue," he said. "I never heard of anything like this."

"You must know something! "

"Hey, your guess is as good as mine, pal."

*****

Then one morning, Barbara's mysterious illness was gone, just like that. But something equally strange happened.

"How are my clothes too tight?" she asked. "I'm a ghost -- ghosts don't gain weight! What the ... what the hell is going on???"

Beej came into the Maitlands' attic bedroom, saw Barbara struggling to button her dress, and grinned. "You're looking good, Babs -- the extra pounds suit you!"

"Beej! Knock it off!" Adam said with uncharacteristic vehemence.

"Sorry! " the demon shot back. "I was just tryna be supportive!"

"How is this possible?" Barbara asked him.

Beej shrugged. "I don't know -- unless you wanted to put on a couple of pounds, it shouldn't be possible." He looked at her. "Uhh ... you didn't, did you?"

"No! " she wailed.

"Okay, just checking. Uh, can I ... uhh ...?" He held out his hands as if to touch her belly.

Frowning, Barbara nodded. Beej put both hands on her abdomen.

"What is it?" Adam asked.

"Not sure," came the reply. "But something's different."

"What's different? What is happening to me??? "

Beej sighed. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you were ... pregnant."

*****

"Pregnant??? " the Deetzes exclaimed in unison when they were told.

"Can ghosts even get pregnant?" Lydia asked.

"Apparently they can," Beej said.

"Ohhh!" Delia squealed, throwing her arms around Barbara. "You're going to have a baby! Congratulations!"

"Uh, yes ... congratulations to you both," Charles said, not knowing what else to say. He reached out and shook Adam's hand. "I'm sure ... you'll both make fine parents."

"Th-thanks," Adam replied. "It's still a bit of a shock."

"I'll say," Lydia added.

"Oh!" Delia said suddenly. "You'll be able to use your crib!"

"Yes," Barbara nodded. "Yes, we will." She looked like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car.

"We'll have to plan a baby shower!" Delia said. "When are you due?"

I-I ... I don't know," Barbara said. "Maybe ... eight, eight and a half months, I guess? It's a ... a ghost baby, so ... I don't know if it'll come sooner, or ..."

*****

"What if ... what if the baby isn't what we're expecting?" Lydia asked. She and Beej were up on the roof, looking at the stars. "What if it's not ... just a ghost baby? What if it's something else?"

"A demon?"

She nodded. "I mean, this has never happened before, right? How do we know what it's gonna be? It could be anything."

"If it's a demon, or anything else, I'll take it back to the Netherworld," Beej said. "But I'm not getting any demon vibes."

"Okay," Lydia said, reassured. After a moment, she looked at him. "How are you feeling about all this?"

"I'm happy for 'em," he replied. "They always wanted a kid. And I like babies."

"What do you know about babies?" Lydia asked with a smirk.

"Hey, I used to babysit Alex's daughter!"

"Alex Medford? The one who wrote your summoning spell?"

Beej nodded. "Yeah -- me and Riley had a lot of fun."

"Huh," she said. "Somehow, I can't picture you as a babysitter."

"I was a great babysitter," he told her. "In fact, I'm the best babysitter ever! "

*****

Within a couple of weeks, Barbara was barely able to fit into any of her clothes.

"What am I supposed to do?" she said morosely. "I can't just walk around naked! "

"I wouldn't mind," Beej quipped.

"Beej," Adam said, a warning tone in his voice.

Beej's hair instantly turned purple. "Sorry," he said contritely. "I was just tryna lighten the mood."

"I'm taking you to the maternity store," Delia told her. "Let's get you a whole new wardrobe." She looked at Lydia. "Would you like to join us?"

Lydia rolled her eyes and sighed exaggeratedly. "I guess -- but I'm only going for Barbara. Just for moral support."

Delia clapped her hands excitedly. "Oh, this is going to be fun! Just us girls!"

"What're we supposed to do?" Beej asked.

"You can help me finish getting the crib ready," Adam suggested.

"Okay," the demon agreed happily.

*****

"What are you reading?" Charles asked when he came into the bedroom.

Delia held up the book: Pregnancy for Dummies. "I thought I should learn how to help Barbara through this -- after all, it's not as if she can go to an OB/GYN."

"No," Charles agreed, shaking his head. "No, I suppose not."

"The good news is that her pregnancy seems to be going well -- although it's progressing a lot faster than if she were still alive."

"BJ has said that time moves differently in the Netherworld -- I suppose the same holds true for the dead in our world." He paused. "How long do you think it'll be?"

"I'm not sure," Delia replied. "Maybe a couple of months?"

*****

"A couple of months? " Barbara exclaimed. "I ... I'm not ready -- there's so much to do! A-are you sure?"

Delia shook her head. "No," she said. "I'm not sure -- I'm just going by how fast it's been moving so far. It might slow down."

"Or it might not," Barbara said. "It might start going faster. Oh, God ..."

"It'll be all right," Delia told her, putting an arm around her friend's shoulder. "You have Adam, as well as me, Charles and Lydia -- we're all here to help."

"Don't forget about me!" Beej said, appearing suddenly. "I can help, too!"

Barbara smiled at the demon. "I'm sure you're going to be a big help, Beej," she said. "After all, who knows more about being born dead than you?"

He smiled, his hair turning pink.

*****

"Adam? Come over here."

"What is it, honey?" he asked, immediately concerned. "Is something wrong?"

Barbara shook her head, smiling. "I felt the baby kick. Oh! It happened again!"

"Really?" Adam said, grinning. "Can I ...?"

She nodded, and he put his hands on her belly. "I can't feel -- oh! I felt it!" His face lit up. "I really felt it!"

There was a knock on the door, and Lydia entered. "Hi, guys. I --"

"Lydia!" Barbara exclaimed. "The baby's kicking -- you have to feel it!"

The girl came over and placed a hand on the woman's belly. A moment later, her eyes widened in surprise. "Oh, wow -- that's amazing! Does it hurt?"

"A -- a little," Barbara admitted. "But it's not too bad."

"Hey guys!" Beej said, appearing suddenly. "What's going on?"

"You gotta feel this!" Lydia told him. She took his hand and put it on Barbara's belly.

"Oof! " Barbara grunted. "That's the strongest one yet!"

"What was that??? " the demon exclaimed.

"That's the baby kicking," Lydia told him.

Beej scowled, streaks of red shooting through his hair. "You stop hurting your mom!" he told the baby.

Barbara chuckled. "It's okay, Beej," she said. "It's perfectly normal -- it means the baby is healthy."

"Well, okay," he said doubtfully. "If you say so." Mollified, his hair returned to its normal green. "I guess it is kinda cramped in there -- I'd probably kick, too."

*****

"Uhh, Barbara?" Lydia said.

"What?" Then she realised that the girl's attention was focussed on her chest, and she looked down. "I'm leaking??? Oh, God!"

Lydia smiled. "Relax," she said. "It's perfectly normal, right?"

Barbara sighed in exasperation. "I know ... it's just -- it's a pain, that's all. I mean it's one thing after another!"

"Maybe that's the way the universe makes sure that you're ready to be a mother," Lydia told her.

"You sound like Delia," Barbara replied with a smirk.

"Yeah, well -- she's got a lot of out there ideas, but some of it actually makes sense, you know?" Lydia smiled. "I've learned not to automatically dismiss what she says -- I mean, my BFFFF is a demon, after all!

"Now, let's get you cleaned up."

*****

"Hey, guys," Beej said. "Has anybody noticed that Babs is a lot bigger now?"

"She is pregnant, dumbass," Lydia smirked. "It kinda goes with the territory."

"I know that, Lydia!" Beej retorted, scowling comically. "I'm not talking about her belly! I'm talking about her ..." He held his hands up as if he was carrying two melons in front of his chest.

"Beej!" Adam exclaimed.

"Well, I mean I can't be the only one who's noticed! She's huge! And hot!"

Adam nodded reluctantly. "Yeah," he said. "You have a point."

Beej grinned and punched him playfully in the arm. "Bet you're having a lot of fun with 'em, aren't you?"

"Ow!" Adam winced, rubbing the spot. "No, I -- Barbara says they're too tender for ... you know -- that kind of thing."

"Well, that sucks. Hey, maybe they'll stay like that after the baby's born, huh?" the demon licked his lips suggestively.

Adam glared at him.

"Hey, I'm just sayin'!"

*****

"Bunny?" Adam sat down beside his wife and began rubbing her back. "What's wrong?"

Delia came in and immediately went over to Barbara and knelt in front of her. She took both of Barbara's hands in hers. "Why are you crying?"

"I ... I-I don't know," she replied despondently. "I can't help it -- what's wrong with me?"

Delia smiled gently. "It's the hormones," she explained. "Your body is being flooded with all kinds of hormones, and that causes weird mood swings. Think of it like ... uhh, like ..."

"Like?"

"Oh! I know -- like the baby is sharing all of its hopes and fears with you!"

Adam looked at Delia. "That's ... almost beautiful," he said.

"Thanks," she said. "I thought it was pretty good." She stood up. "I'll go make some lemon balm tea -- it'll help you feel better."

A few minutes later she returned with a mug of steaming herbal tea, as well as the geode Dewey had given her for Christmas. "Here you go," she said, handing the mug to Barbara. She set the rock on the nightstand.

"Thank you," Barbara said, and took a sip. "What's with the geode?"

"It's amethyst," Delia told her. "It's very good for calming anxiety and mood swings -- I think you could use it." She held up her hands to stave off any protests. "I know, I know -- crystals! All that woo-woo stuff. But they really do work. Believe me -- crystals have helped me immensely. Besides, it can't hurt, right?"

"Thanks, Delia," Adam said. "That's very kind of you."

"I've got something else for you," Delia said, and produced a necklace of marbled green gemstones. "Malachite," she explained. "One of the best all-rounders for pregnancy."

"Oh, it's gorgeous! " Barbara exclaimed, taking the necklace in both hands.

"And meditation is great for managing emotions, too -- if you're interested."

"Thank you," Barbara said. "You're a ... a wonderful friend."

"Us girls have to stick together, right?"

*****

"Okay!" Delia said, clapping her hands together. "Are we ready for your first session?"

"I don't have to sit on a floor cushion or anything, do I?" Barbara asked. "I ... I don't think I could manage it."

"Of course not, dear," Delia reassured her. "The only thing that matters is that you're comfortable -- you can sit here."

Adam, holding his wife's hand, helped her settle into the armchair and took his seat in the other chair.

Barbara let out a heavy sigh. "I think this baby's going to be gigantic," she said.

Delia lowered herself to the floor and crossed her legs in the lotus position, her hands face up on her thighs, middle fingers and thumbs touching.

"Take a long, deep breath," she said, "and as you exhale, feel the weight of your body connecting you to your seats. Another deep breath ... and another ... and one more.

"Now, as your breathing retuns to normal, I want you to focus on how your breath feels as it enters your nose and exits your mouth ..."

*****

"I'm hungry," Barbara said.

"What would you like, honey?" Adam asked.

"I need ... ice cream. And kimchi. With anchovies and Oreos."

Adam grimaced. "Are ... are you sure about that?" he asked. "That doesn't sound very appetising."

"It's what I want!" she glared at him.

"Okay, okay," he replied. "If that's what you want, that's what I'll get you. In the meantime, you should just try breathing --"

"You try breathing!" she shot back.

Adam hurried out of the bedroom, nearly colliding with Beej on the stairs.

"Wow," the demon said. "Babs sure gets angry when she's hungry, huh?"

"It's just the hormones," Adam replied.

"Oh, yeah. Right. Hey, speakin' of -- I once made a whore moan so loud that --"

"Where's my ice cream??? " Barbara roared suddenly.

"Coming, dear!" Adam called back. "Not now, Beej!"

"Uh, yeah -- I'll tell you later," the demon said as Adam brushed past him. He shook his head. "Yeesh! Poor guy. I'm glad I'm not tied down. Footloose and fancy free -- that's me!" But a tinge of purple threaded its way through his green hair.

*****

Then one morning, Adam was getting dressed when he heard Barbara say, "Oh, God! "

He ran to the bathroom, still pulling on his shirt. "What happened?"

Barbara was just standing there in front of the sink, looking down at the puddle at her feet. She turned and looked at him. "I think it's time," she said. "My water broke."

"Already? It's only been three months!" He gathered himself and put an arm around her shoulders. "Uh, okay ... we need to get you downstairs -- no. I need to get everybody up here. Yeah, that's what I ... but first, let's get you back to bed, okay?

"Beej!"

"What's going on?" the demon said, appearing.

"It's time," Adam told him.

"Time for what?"

"The baby's coming! Go get everybody!"

"Holy crap! Okay, yeah -- you got it, buddy!" He grinned and gave them a double thumbs-up, and disappeared again.

Adam led his wife back to the bed and helped her get settled, and shortly after Beej returned with the Deetzes.

Delia went over to Barbara and took her hand. "Are you sure?" she asked.

Barbara nodded. "Yes -- it's coming. I'm not ready. I --" She grunted suddenly as the first contraction hit her. "Ohh, GOD!!! AAAAAHHH!!!"

"Okay," Delia said. "Remember your breathing exercises."

"What can I do?" Charles asked.

"Get a basin of cool water and a washcloth," Delia instructed. "You can mop her brow."

"I thought it was supposed to be hot water," he said.

"That's for later, when the baby comes -- BJ can heat the water when it's time."

"Just say the word," the demon nodded.

"Lydia," Delia said, "you and Adam can talk to Barbara -- help keep her calm."

Lydia nodded, and she joined Adam at Barbara's side. Charles returned with the basin and washcloths, and took his place beside his daughter and started gently mopping the pregnant ghost's brow.

"BJ, I need you to take Barbara's hand while I centre myself," Delia said.

"Me??? " the demon said, backing away. "Nuh-uh! Nope! No siree Bob!"

"BJ!"

"I don't know nothin' 'bout birthin' no babies! "

"Get over here and help! " Barbara snarled between clenched teeth. "Or I swear to God I'll -- AAAAAHHH!!! "

"Ommmm ..." Delia intoned, her eyes closed. "Ommmm ..."

The demon rushed to Barbara's side, his eyes welling up. "I don't know what to do!!! "

He gently took her hand in his and almost instantly regretted it as another contraction began. Beej's knees buckled and his face contorted comically as the ghost squeezed his hand violently.

"Ow ow ow ow ow! " he hissed.

"Don't be such a baby!" Adam told him. "You're a demon -- you don't have to feel pain!"

"I know that, Adam! I ... just wasn't expecting it, is all!"

"Breathe through the pain," Adam said. "Remember? Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo."

Beej began imitating him, breathing in short bursts. "Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo."

"Not you, dumbass!" Lydia said.

Beej glared comically at her. She stuck her tongue out at him.

"Just breathe, Barbara," Lydia told her.

"You're doing great, honey," Adam said.

"OH, GOD!!! " Barbara screamed, as the next contraction began. "I swear to God, Adam -- if you ever touch me again, I'll cut your b-- AAAH! AAAAAHHH!!! "

"OH, FUUUUUCK!!! " Beej moaned at the same moment as she clenched his hand even tighter.

"Okay, PUSH!!! " Delia roared as Barbara bore down. "PUUUSH!!! "

"I see the head!" Adam exclaimed. "Come on, honey -- just a little bit more ..."

"I can't," Barbara sobbed. "I ... I changed my mind -- I don't want to be a moth-- AAAAAHHH!!! "

"You can do it," Delia said. "You have to! Now, woman up and PUSH!!! "

Barbara nodded and took a deep breath, gritted her teeth and gave it everything she had.

Then suddenly Adam was holding a baby in his hands. "Oh my god oh my god ohmygod ohmygod ohmygod! " he laughed. "You did it!"

Beej held his hand briefly over the basin, heating the water as Charles tied off both ends of the umbilical cord and cut it with the surgical scissors, and then Adam handed the baby to Delia and she cleaned out its mouth with a finger. The new arrival took its first breath and let out a wail as she used one of the washcloths to clean the infant.

"What is it?" Barbara asked. "Let me see!"

"It's a girl," Delia told her, placing the now washed and swaddled baby in Barbara's arms. "A healthy ghost-baby girl. Congratulations!"

Barbara began crying, tears of joy and exhaustion streaming down her face as she looked down at the infant. "A girl," she said softly. "Hello, little one -- we've been waiting a very long time to meet you."

"She's kinda wrinkly," Beej noted, but his eyes were filled with wonder.

"What are you going to call her?" Lydia asked.

"Lily," Barbara said quietly, smiling at her husband. "Her name is Lily -- after Adam's mother."

[the-depths-of-the-coral-sea]

oop its 1:16am time to sleep

goodnight!!

[pinnakoladda]

i just have to do it until 10 lens. idc its 1:16am. i need to

[dhr-ao3]

Ill Always Come Back to You

I’ll Always Come Back to You https://ift.tt/MNkqR4A by VintageCherry It was an advanced, but simple, spell. An upward flick, a twirl to the right, and a downward flick. She had practiced it over and over and over again. She had found the spell one evening while she waited for the Order meeting to be over so they could have dinner. A book sat alone, clean of any dust, on a shelf in a room that she had never been in before in 12 Grimmauld Place. She had picked the book up, always a curious one, and read through the pages. But the pages seemed to be charmed. The book lifted from her hands and started to flip the pages for her, quickly. The air produced from it blew across her face. Her eyes were wide as she looked at the spell that the book had wanted to show her. It was perfect. It would save everyone in case Harry’s plan failed. Words: 3036, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/M Characters: Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Ron Weasley, Harry Potter, Voldemort (Harry Potter) Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy Additional Tags: Second Wizarding War with Voldemort (Harry Potter), Battle of Hogwarts, Hermione found a spell to fix everything, Established Relationship, voldemort still hugs draco, its still awkward, Beta Read, memory spell via AO3 works tagged 'Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy' https://ift.tt/GDEFWSL November 10, 2024 at 04:16AM

[fallingrealms16]

Sterek Fic Recs PART 2 <333

So back in january I did a lil sterek fic rec post and since then I have read MANY new ones that are old but new to me, so, in honour of easter weekend coming up and honestly, JUST BECAUSE, here are some more of my fav fics!

MUAHAHA

We've Written Volumes (in Blood and Scars and Ink) by notthequiettype

25.9K words // Chapters: 1/1 // Hits: 548K // COMPLETED

//Explicit// Stiles is on his back on hard-packed dirt. He's cold and there are leaves stuck to his neck and there's a four inch gash in his side that he thinks he can feel his ribs through. There's so much blood around him he feels like he's floating on a pond and everything is so much dimmer above him than it was a minute ago, which is saying something because he's in the dark center of the forest in the middle of the night. And the worst of it is that he's alone, totally alone with the smell of his own blood drowning him and the soft side of him run through by a tree. As his eyes slip shut, the last thing he thinks is, "This is going to kill my dad."

Ready to Stay by adara

61.3K words // Chapters: 17/17 // Hits: 17.9K // COMPLETED

//Not Rated// In which Stiles is not doing great post-S4. Derek returns to Beacon Hills to pick up the pieces and redefine a new normal. A series of what was meant to be loosely tied together drabbles but actually ended up being 17 chapters of slowburn angst, some scattered supernaturals, and an eventual happy ending with all the Sterek.

The Scent of Love by Zero_Nemad

64.1K words // Chapters 27/27 // Hits: 9.8K // COMPLETED

//Explicit//

It's been years since Derek and Stiles saw each other. In this slow build romance story, they meet again in Europe and spent the summer together. They start building a new friendship out of a difficult past they both want to leave behind. It'll be weeks of unspoken attraction and emotional reluctance.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation by grimm

118.7K words // Chapters: 4/4 // HIts: 481.7K // COMPLETED

//Explicit// There's something weird about Beacon Hills that Stiles can't quite put his finger on. The way everyone in town knows his name the day he arrives. The way they insist the melancholic howling that echoes through the forest every night is just a dog. The way his dad denies getting a dog, even though Stiles comes home to find one sprawled across his bed, some big black thing whose eyes gleam red in the right light. The way that massive oak tree out in the woods vibrates under his touch, pulsing with sickly life. There's something weird going on in this town, and Stiles is determined to get to the bottom of it.

Home by TheTypewriterGirl

167.1K words // Chapters: 18/18 // Hits: 885.1K // COMPLETED

//Teen and Up//

January seventh. Seven days since the start of 2015, and seven days since his father’s death. The bastard, he thinks bitterly. The past year Derek Hale had made it blatantly obvious that he hated his scrawny guts, taking every given opportunity to shove him up against a wall, growl threats in his ears and roll his eyes whenever he stepped into the room, muttering some snide comment about how spastic or idiotic he was. So why did he fucking volunteer to take him in?

its currently 5:16am..writing and reading does not sleep AND NEITHER DO I

[usafphantom2]

U.S. Navy starts investigation and releases images of the P-8 that sweeped the runway and stopped inside the sea in Hawaii

Fernando Valduga By Fernando Valduga 11/27/2023 - 10:16am Aeronautical Accidents, Military

The U.S. Navy will call an investigation into the November 20 accident in Hawaii, where a Navy's P-8A Poseidon reconnaissance and surveillance aircraft passed the end of the runway and ended up in Kaneohe Bay in Hawaii, authorities said, adding that the aircraft is structurally intact.

Three pilots, along with a crew of two officers and four soldiers, were on board the aircraft at the time, but no injuries were reported, authorities said. The Poseidon belonging to the 4 "Skinny Dragons" Patrol Squadron of Whidbey Island, Washington, was landing at Kaneohe Bay Marine Corps Air Station when, for undetermined reasons, the aircraft left the runway and entered the shallow bay just before 2 p.m. (local time for Hawaii). The weather at the time of the accident was cloudy and windy.

The P-8A Poseidon, based on the Boeing 737 plane, remained in the bay until Tuesday night.

“The U.S. Navy will call an investigation to determine the cause and factors that contributed to the accident,” San Diego-based U.S.-based 3ª Fleet officials said in a statement released Tuesday night.

The flight data recorder has already been recovered while the military continues to plan the removal of the aircraft.

The U.S. Navy Aircraft Accident Council is investigating the site at the Hawaii Marine Corps Base in Kaneohe Bay, trying to determine the cause of the accident and any factors that contributed. A hydrographic survey was carried out to evaluate the structural integrity of the P-8A plane.

"The preliminary evaluation indicates that the aircraft is structurally intact and there are no signs of fuel leakage from the aircraft," they said. “More information will be released as soon as it is available,” the statement said.

The aircraft ended up near the end of the runway, with its fuselage apparently floating in the sand and coral-covered bay. The first responders and emergency teams who arrived at the site established floating barriers to contain any fuel that spread through the bay. “Diverers from Mobile Diving and Rescue Unit 1 worked during the night to help stabilize the aircraft,” officials said in the statement.

Residents of Kaneohe Bay expressed concerns about possible damage to coral reefs and other potential damage caused by fuels or other chemicals in the area, which is about 2.4 kilometers from a former fishing spot.

A response team was formed to deal with aircraft recovery, force protection and environmental issues, authorities said. This specially trained team monitors the area 24 hours a day.

Another Washington state crew, from the VP-40 "Fighting Marlins" squadron, arrived Thursday to take over the coverage of the internal defense, the Navy said.

Tags: Aeronautical AccidentsMilitary AviationP-8A PoseidonUSN - United States Navy/U.S. Navy

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Fernando Valduga

Fernando Valduga

Aviation photographer and pilot since 1992, has participated in several events and air operations, such as Cruzex, AirVenture, Dayton Airshow and FIDAE. He has work published in specialized aviation magazines in Brazil and abroad. Uses Canon equipment during his photographic work in the world of aviation.

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[kiochisato]

hm.. mind if i ask.. what time is it for you? its 11:16am rn (i cant believe its Jan 1 already help)

6:32 pm !! ^_^

[chaoxfix]

filing this for future use because i think. its fun. i want to use it somewhere

if the ghosts know im freaked out its over, its an emotional stealth mission and i have to win [1:16AM]

its the timestamp for me

[redwinesupernova]

maybe its the 1:16am talking but girl i am never getting out of here

[sewerratzz]

i had exactly one [1] piece of toast at 4pm today. its now 3:16am so. goodnight i guess

[xbrokenflowers]

September 9, 2024 – 4:16AM

It’s really late at night right now and I am panicking tonight. Why? Because I can’t believe my I dropped my phone on my face and my nose accidentally sent you a fucking friend request at fucking 2:17AM. LITERALLY 2 HOURS AGO. This wasn’t how i envisioned any of this quite honestly. There’s multiple routes that could happen:

1. You see the request but it doesn’t load and so you just think its facebook maybe glitching (I don’t think you’re that dumb)

2. You see it and decide to message me and question why i have sent a random as request so late at night.

3. You see the cancelled request and in return send a request to me instead. Which would be really bad.

4. You see the request and block me from FB altogether (I would prefer this to not happen as I just want us to be on good terms without really being on good terms? Blocking would be so extreme in my opinion and hurt my soul. Lmao)

5. You see it and ignore it altogether. This will hurt me too but it’s the best route quite honestly.

As much as I would love to reconnect with you, now isn’t the right time. I’m not ready. I’m terrified of reconnecting with you again, because I dont know how the outcome will be. It scares me. I’m just not ready for you and I to speak to each other again. But I know I also miss you, I’m so conflicting. I hate this. I want to crawl into a hole. Because I didn’t want this to happen. Not in this way at least. I wanted to do it when i was more confident in talking to you. How did I fuck up this bad.

- xbrokenflowers