#it. was. thoroughly not worth it
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ok i am *never* making my own sushi again
#alpaca.txt#i.am. in sO MUCH PAIN#it was terrible sushi#i couldnt even cut it up either#and now i am. very ill#it wasnt even raw fish. it was cooked!! properly!!#like. so much went wrong with the making of it but. i should have been ok with all the ingredients!#ive never gotten pain with sushi before!! even on Bad Stomach Days#it. was. thoroughly not worth it#should have saved time money and energy and walked to the sushi shop
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bring your son to work day
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#tsumsted wonderland#sorry this might be it guys#just kind of burnt out right now#i am enjoying the event though! i love these silly beanbags and their charming little adventures#can't wait for silver-tsum to wake up just long enough to take a bullet for malleus-tsum#and i extra extra love malleus and his beanbag both being SO passive-aggressive about missing the pile-up#the solution: DANCE PARTY#APPARENTLY#between this and glorious masquerade i'm starting to think this is malleus' solution to everything#(is this how episode 7 will end) (we DO traditionally get an end-of-episode rhythmic...)#also a+ some truly excellent spritework going on in this on#(sebek crunches down slightly 'RIDE ME WAKATSUMSAMA') (long beat) (malleus and tsum just sliiiiiide away screen left)#genuinely so much funnier than a literal depiction could ever be#anyway i did some careful calculations re:the probability of upcoming cards that i absolutely need and long story short#i am key-poor but tsum!malleus-rich >:)#(immediately goes through and switches all his lesson sprites to having a tsum wobbling on his head) worth it#now watch next month they're going to give us a white rabbit rerun with malleus and/or lilia as the frilliest froufrou bunnies#and i will be thoroughly effed
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Why bother? (Why bother?) It's gonna hurt me. (It's gonna hurt me.) It's gonna kill when- (Why bother!) -You desert me! (Gonna hurt me!)
Set after Nightmare. Laios is reminiscing and contemplating.
#laishuro#laios touden#i make a lot of jokes on here since part of the fun of this blog for me is limiting myself to only expressing ideas via drawings#as much as I can to try to see what I can try to convey in the limited time I have to draw each day which is sometimes like 15minutes#but laios idea of who shuro was to him and who he continues to be and how it ties into his own feelings of self worth and self hatred#not to mention being so thoroughly defined by having never been indulged before by the men in his life#are so compelling to me#and then of course you mix in toshiros own mind prisons#and their established dynamic of him begrudgingly putting up with him because he feels he has to and bc hes cursed with obedience#whilst laios genuinely thinks shuro does it because he likes it and likes laios because why else would anyone act like that#when everyone else in his life has not hesitated to Let Him Know#this is what is so fun about relationships like this…forever passing by each other’s true feelings like ships in the night#sometimes i get embarassed how deep i get for some of the characters in this series it really is that deep sometimes but not always#but WHATEVER#i never even engaged in or was interested in shipping the several years i read dunmeshi EXCEPT laishuro lol#which i sadistically wanted to stay one sided and miserable forever. I rarely get fed such genuinely fraught dynamics as their one in manga#so i became obsessed#and walked through the desert alone for 40 years and then checked in as anime started airing that other people ship this and gaf#and decided to unleash the jokes and ideas that my like 2 friend who like anime previously suffered alone as though they were jesus christ#now tho as much as I still enjoy tragedy and pain and emotional suffering I’ve let love and peace and requited fulfilled yaoi into my life#with laishuro. and its great!#my comics
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youtuber i watch who's playing disco elysium rn passed the shipping container check on his first try at 3% chance and i was genuinely just as flabbergasted as he was
#high net worth individual speedrun!!!!#leo.txt#de#disco elysium#i love his playthrough so much actually it's hilarious#it's been 2 days and he hasn't checked out the body yet#but he's explored like every nook and cranny of martinaise#and he doesn't get like half of the political commentary but he still does his best to read everything thoroughly JBSDFJKFDFK
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finally stepped foot on the sacred grounds of miraculous ladybug
#so i went outside to touch grass and ended up in. paris#it has been a Weekend <- ticked off the list every possible tourist attraction (and a few underrated spots) in less than 4 days#and man. that is one big city#excellent food. surreal views. strange but wonderful sensation of seeing that famous landmarks/paintings/french ppl actually exist#also great place to converse in all the languages you know :D it's like the whole world is there#history all around. very musical. spotted a little girl in a lb onesie. the grass-touching was literal (had to see that one stadium)#got a custom shirt of my fav player and a dazai noodle stopper. also the muscle soreness of all time <- all of them thoroughly worth it#yk i COULD proudly say i was just plagging around paris- except no lazing around was done whatsoever#quite possibly the experience of the year 😌#now if you'll excuse me i need to sleep until christmas
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Just wanted to ask is cult of the lamb on switch worth it like is it still updated or has it been abandoned
It got the sin update if that’s what you’re asking
Only problem is like — the lag is still pretty shitty. I remember getting too many followers ( you need that many for the after game ) and my switch can barely run it :/ so I had to play on laptop
#trust me it’s more worth it on computer#idk why they just won’t like ?? fix the switch ?? like if we have to pay sm for the game you’d think they’d put in some bug fixes#regardless I DID beat the game on switch and still thoroughly enjoyed it there regardless of small spike lags#it’s possible but just not worth it.#ask
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day 32
Twelve drinks! Strolling out of the hospital. Is it hair of the dog if you stay drunk and don’t stop at all? Another night losing it more than I can afford Was I just feeling bored? Am I that insecure?
[...] I’m gonna hate myself tomorrow then I’ll do it again
#cookie run#vampire cookie#vampire cookie daily#cw alcohol#even though here it's only really implied#sparkling cookie#i am thoroughly beat after this week#but it was worth it methinks
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HENRY WINTER ASS CHARACTER
#posts only this about the likeness again sorry#i just got to an incredibly funny part thats not worth posting a pic but he doesnt know who the prime minister is#txt#currently reading#thoroughly enjoying my little tsh-love-letter crimefic#glad i decided to continue with it although i was at first lukewarm on it compared to in the woods
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having a bad time lmao, busted old phone went missing with my authenticator app.... i have a lot of old important shit on that stupid thing but also i need my 2fa codes
#disappeared during the move and has yet to resurface......i am more and more sure it fell out of my pocket in the car at some point#but that car isn't ours so i have no way to check it. just gotta take the word of the owners that it isn't there#but i am also...idk. unconvinced they'd care enough to search thoroughly. since i'm worth less than dirt to them.#stirring up trouble#and maybe i'm not actually that worthless to them! it's just. the impression i got after a couple of years being glared at any time#i entered a common area. and sometimes having to fish my belongings out of the trash if i could find what went missing in the first place#and being told--actually. nah. that's too personal for the internet. but. yknow. i just. am reasonably sure their opinion of me is low#and it's not like i make money. with that as a key metric in determining worth i guess it's understandable...
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3 days post fob and my voice is entirely completely gone 😭 which is so funny bc ive never fully lost it after any other concert but ig fob was on a mission to kill me and they succeeded fjdndkd
#even funnier is the last two days it was like hoarse but still there but today???#fully suffering the consequences of screaming for two hours straight <3 worth it#i think what fully did me in was when rat a tat started i like soooo thoroughly lost my shit i was Done for 😭#txt
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Filled with literally so many feelings about jimbotnik I could burst from the seams
Just… thinking about him, his upbringing, the reasons he is the way he is now, what’s buried beneath the crafted image…
The loneliness he’s likely felt growing up. The depression and anxiety and self loathing I’m sure he’s had since far too young that he buries so deep if it were to escape again it would probably have 3 heads now. But you can only hold so much back before that dam bursts and it all overflows in a flood
He’s so fascinating to analyze and dissect psychologically, and to overlook his whole life. I’d really like to write some pieces touching on those things more directly, I have so many thoughts I couldn’t possibly convey properly just by babbling
Give jimbotnik the love and friendships he deserves!!!
#stobotnik#ivo robotnik#agent stone#jimbotnik#dr robotnik#not to be a jimbotnik apologist on main but I think it’s just really sad that he’s only a bad guy because he’s been so thoroughly neglected#him being an asshole is a very charming part of his character of course but being hated by everyone#and viewed as a villain#feels so excessive for a dude who’s just kind of a mentally I’ll menace#ill**#let him be the local jackass but goddamn he’s still human as much as he wants to deny it#that heart in there is more human than a lot of people and he can’t even see it#and it’s the way that Stone is the only person who’s given a shit#who’s cared for him#who’s seen HIM and his everything and thinks he’s worth it#wants to devote himself to him and show him he’s valued and appreciated#that he’s wanted somewhere by someone#I think about that one line from the rescuers a lot that I used in my kidbotnik piece#’someone’s waiting to love you’ feels so applicable to stobotnik#cries into my pillow from all these thoughts#I just want jimbotnik to be loved it pains me so deeply to see someone so deprived of every human need truly#mocha rambles#clays fic really got me in my feelings uuwuwah
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there are a lot of reasons i think pericles is really slept on as one of the most tragic characters in sdmi, and they start with how easy it is to connect the dots that he took a mind-destroying curse full to the face as an infant. one that breaks adult humans and renders them unrecognizable, when pericles was not only a baby but is from a species that is explicitly much more vulnerable to it. right from the beginning of his life the entity obliterated his sense of self so thoroughly that there's not even a version of him who shows up in the Sitting Room.
fuck, man.
#sdmi#scooby doo mystery incorporated#professor pericles#sdmi is fundamentally a show about the cycle of trauma and abuse--about breaking a very literal generational curse#and i think it does a real disservice to both that theme#and pericles' narrative specifically#that he gets painted as That One Guy Who's Just Evil and Abusive for No Reason#when everyone else gets the benefit of 'even thoroughly horrible people are still people'#'and that doesn't mean they didn't hurt you; or that you have to let them keep hurting you'#'or that you're obliged to proceed in a way allowing for the possibility they'll decide to stop. that's on them to do. and they might not.'#even w/o the systemic oppression or decades of torture and psychiatric abuse#pericles was a victim of the entity in genuinely and quite possibly the most thorough way of them all. and yet he made a lifetime worth of#choices and many many many of them were to harm people in horrific ways; to his own ends and for his own satisfaction#and like. what do you do with that.#it is difficult and uncomfortable to sit with that and draw conclusions from it that are neither 'his trauma means none of that counts'#nor 'okay yeah well he's a victim BUT HE DID BAD THINGS SO THAT DOESN'T MATTER FUCK HIM'#if there's any show that invites you to do that it's sdmi; i love that about it. but you can't leave pericles out w/o defeating the purpose#especially when the nature of his being a link in the cycle of abuse is critical context for exploring the trauma of his victims#the vast majority of what he does to ricky is very clearly projecting and reenacting his own trauma onto a vulnerable target#and just. aaaaahhhhhh i have so many feelings about it god#abuse cw#grooming cw#SDMItag
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My mother got me an advent calendar, and today's note broke me. I'm shuddering at the ineffebility of it all
#good omens#good omens 2#ineffable husbands#ineffable idiots#that was a gut punch#i thought advent calendar notes were supposed to make you feel all warm and cozy not shaking and dizzy#i really need tea and something stronger#no distance of place or lapse in time can lessen the friendship of those two who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth#but didn't we have worth isssssues#like sh*tload of them#ngk
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Friday me: this is going to be great! Nine straight days of not having to go to work, plenty of time to work on all my projects, and write a lot, and clean my house, and–
Saturday: lol no, you're sick, it might be food poisoning from the terrible undercooked restaurant food you had on your work trip
Sunday: lol you're not poisoned but you're still sick, here's a migraine to go with it
#i am thoroughly looking forward to what tomorrow brings me guys#managed to do a lot of cleaning and post a oneshot before i got sick saturday#but now it's sunday afternoon and things are just not going that well lol#prayers appreciated#please let my suffering be funny and then it'll be worth it#personal post
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Sooooooo, BG4 when?
#Im kidding Im kidding the devs clearly worked their ass off and the game turned out amazing#and I will be replaying it for a long time to come#however the ending while awesome was thoroughly unsatisfying for every character that wasn't Wyll and Karlach and maybe Lae'zel#and there's a lot of plot threads to pick up on#so I have to believe/hope they're not putting this cast away just yet lmao#bg3#bg3 spoilers#oh hey I could unfilter those tags now#if I decide the good content is worth risking fandom brain damahe for lol
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☀️
#a week ago i would've never thought that i'd arrive at this decision so soon#and so abruptly!!!!! and like. something about myself that i've always been proud about is my conviction n confidence. once i've made up my-#-mind it's almost impossible for anyone or anything to change it. and that's bc i know that i've already thought it through sooo thoroughly#i have so much conviction! my values my heart my logic brought me here! im sooo clear about what i want#n anyway back to the original point....... somehow everything was timed perfectly#it was a perfect storm. but the me from a week ago would've never thought that i'd decide so quickly#and now that i have. i feel so light and invincible. i have sooo much conviction that im doing the right thing#and if anyone's gonna try to change my mind they'd have to go through my values my heart and my head. not Easy!!! i'm so assured aha........#personal#i think i'm in a good place! i think there's nothing i cannot do!! i'll get through anything#im competent and capable and kind. im a decent person! flawed obviously but like. im alright#mayb this is what adulting is all about. learning to stand up for urself. learning that u don't have to put up with things at work bc-#-your values and heart are worth so much more than A Job. n you should protect everything that makes you You!!! oho
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