#it's still my own fault. it's still on me for not saying anything.

[beamorgan]

Favourite Reads of the Year

I will not be ranking these, because that would hurt my heart. Buckle up folks, there are a lot of amazing books out there

The Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells

I know, I KNOW, I'm late to the party but omg this whole series is just as good as people say!!! I know I said I wouldn't be ranking, but if I was these would be fighting for the top spot. I have already relistened to all the audiobooks. I anticipate rereading them literally every year from now on. I would die for Murderbot, which it would think is a stupid thing for a human to do when there is a SecUnit right there. [adult, scifi]

Emily Wilde's Map of the Otherlands by Heather Fawcett

Sequel to last year's fav Emily Wilde's Encyclopaedia of Faeries, this follows a bullheaded academic trying find the magical door that will let her faerie boyfriend back into his faerie kingdom. Chaos ensues in the Alps. It's fabulous, and the author's approach to using folklore is very similar to my own writing, which I love and also get imposter syndrome about. 10/10 recommend [adult, historical fantasy]

Model Home by Solomon Rivers

Would you like to be repeatedly punched in the gut? Look no further than this story of racism and child abuse in a Texas McMansion, with gorgeous prose and a genderqueer protagonist and the laundry list of content warnings you can expect with the genre. It hurt so good. [adult, contemporary gothic horror]

You Should Be So Lucky by Cat Sebastian

This love affair between a baseball play and a sports reporter was recced to me by the lovely @colubrina and boy was it worth the two-day binge it inspired! Romance can be very hit-or-miss for me, but this knocked it out of the park (please enjoy my pun). I didn't even have to know anything about baseball to love it! [adult, historical (1960s) romance]

The Locked Tomb Series by Tamsyn Muir

Another tumblr fav, FOR A REASON. Gideon is hilarious. Harrow is an absolute mess. Nona is BABY, my beloved. (Camilla and Palamedes have my whole entire heart). Also, the audiobook narrator is fantastic. In the words of the author, the buns are also fried chicken. [adult, sci fantasy]

Master and Commander by Patrick O'Brian

This one is @elodieunderglass's fault. Historical buffoonery on boats. The main characters are ridiculous. The sailing jargon is incomprehensible. It's great. [adult, historical fiction]

All You Can Ever Know by Nicole Chung

This is a gorgeous memoir of an interracial adoptee trying to make contact with her birth family while pregnant with her own child. It grapples thoughtfully with reconnecting to a lost culture, the complexities of family history, and the social and legal barriers adoptees face to learning about themselves. [adult, memoir]

Death in the Spires by KJ Charles

I devour everything Charles writes, so I was EXCITED for this mystery. She made it very clear on social media "It's not a kissing book!!" (it's kinda still a kissing book). She wrote a stonking book, as usual, with an underdog protagonist revisiting the murder that happened during his toxic time at Oxford university. [adult, historical mystery]

Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar

My favourite literary fiction read of the year, this meditation on Iranian diaspora identity is written by a poet and you can tell. I would suck the prose up through a straw if I could. The protagonist is an addict and also quite suicidal. It was fun :) [adult, literary fiction]

She Who Became the Sun by Shelly Parker-Chan

and the sequel, He Who Drowned the World. I don't even know how to sell this, all I want to do is flail incoherently about how amazing it is. IT'S AMAZING. JUST READ IT. (wait I know: this satisfied the part of me that was obsessed with Mulan as a kid) [adult, historical fantasy]

A Little Trickery by Roseanna Pike

The voicey-est book I've ever read. I screenshot like every other page. It follows an orphaned girl trying to survive in Tudor England through various means, such as faking a miracle in the church where her gay best friend is priest. [adult, historical fiction]

At the End of the River Styx by Michelle Kulwiki

My friend wrote a book! It made me cry!!! They were delighted with this!!! Please give this to any teenager in your life who needs to see thoughtful representation of grief and depression and boys in love. [YA, contemporary fantasy]

[moralesluvr]

RE-TAKE | b. eilish.

ꨄ︎ delivering some more teacher!billie for you… <3

you’re halfway out the door when her voice stops you.

it’s a call of your name, laced with an angry and frustrated tone. you freeze, hand tightening on the strap of your bag. the classroom is empty now, the faint sound of footsteps fading down the hall as everyone clears out for the day.

but you’re still here.

you swallow thickly, turning on your heel to face your teacher. her hair that was previously flowing down her shoulders is now placed in a messy bun, her blazer already discarded on the back of her desk chair— now only clad in a white, too-tight button up and a black skirt.

“we need to talk,” miss eilish says, her voice low and steady. her eyes don’t leave you as you start to walk forward, and she tuts at you harshly.

“no, shut the door.”

your skin feels clammy as you shut the door behind you quietly, dropping your bag on the floor and standing next to the doorframe, awkwardly. the air is thick and hot with tension, and you’re even more scared because you already know what this is about.

it’s about the fucking quiz. the one you didn’t even finish because your mind was elsewhere, lost in a maze of thoughts that all seemed to lead back to her. it wasn’t your fault that miss eilish decided to wear tighter dress pants and a flowier, lower-cut top that day. she had looked so pretty, and she still had that hickey on her collarbone that you had given her the night before, that she tried so hard to cover up with that small collar of her polo.

“come here,” billie says, snapping you out of your intrinsic thoughts. your feet move before your brain can catch up, carrying you toward her.

she waits until you’re standing in front of her desk before holding up the paper, “do you want to explain this?”

your eyes drop to the paper, to the bright red “F” scrawled at the top. even her handwriting was angry with you.

your face burns with shame, and you smooth your hands over your own skirt in hopes that it’ll calm you down. “i… i just had an off day,” you mumble, not even daring to meet eyes.

“an off day,” she repeats, her tone laced with amusement. she gives you a cocky, mocking nod, “that’s funny, because it seems like you’ve been having a lot of those lately. why is your shit not together?”

you swallow hard, your hands clenching at your sides. you don’t even dare to respond.

“look at me,” she says, and your heart stutters in your chest.

you lift your eyes, and there it is— that look she always gives you, the one that makes it impossible to breathe. she knows you down to a T, and her eyes are sharp, knowing of you, like you’re her prized possession.

“you really are better than this,” she says softly, leaning forward, her elbows resting on the desk. “i know you are.”

you nod, your throat too tight to speak. you fight for your eyes not to drift down to her exposed cleavage, so you flutter them shut before you make any more mistakes.

“but…” she trails off, tilting her head slightly, a loose strand of her black hair slipping over her shoulder. “i’m not happy with you. the retake date has already passed, so you’re going to have to show me that you want to pass my class.”

the way she’s looking at you, eyes slit and low, nearly makes you fall to the floor that your shoes keep twisting on, anxiety fueling you.

truth is, billie was always so big on not fucking you in school. it just seemed too risky, but today, it was like she couldn’t care less. she was already pulled closer to you now, unbuttoning your cardigan slowly as you gulped.

“what—what does that mean? i thought…” you stammer, but she just continues with undressing you, her smirk deepening.

“you’re my smart girl,” billie says, her voice like honey. she passes you a wink, “i think you’ll figure it out.”

that nearly kills you. your cardigan’s now on the floor, discarded like it’s worth nothing— and it really isn’t worth anything, not in this moment.

billie doesn’t kiss you with the usual softness she gives you, she kisses you like you mean nothing to her, like you’re worthless, like you’re just her pathetic little student who can never pay attention in class.

it’s quick, the way that billie rips your clothes off, propping you up on her desk as she fumbles around in a locked drawer of her desk, pulling out a thicker, longer, harder strap that you’ve never seen in your life.

“what the—?” you speak shyly, half due to confusion and half because there’s no way she’s going to use that on you. but your eyes turn wide as saucers when you see her slip her skirt and panties off, slipping on the strap and fastening it to her liking.

she pulls you by the hips without saying a word, the tip of the faux cock aligned with your entrance as her tattooed hand snakes around your throat, “don’t fucking talk at all, you hear me? you’ve done all the talking you need to in my class, giggling and whispering instead of doing your work. such a slut..”

you wince as the strap stretches your cunt out, your walls stretching to accommodate how fucking big it was. billie starts off slow, but that doesn’t last for long— she slams into you at a brutal pace, your stomach twisting as her hand slaps over your mouth to block your moans.

“shut up.” she seethes in your ear, her free hand kneading at your ass as her grip on your lips tightens, “you wanna get caught? you want someone to come in here and see me fucking you like this?”

you think her question is rhetorical until she slaps the flesh of your thigh, pushing you to answer her. and she lets you, her hand coming off of your mouth so you can mumble quietly, “n-no! please, billie….i’m so sorry…”

your eyes blink away tears as you feel a mix of pain and pleasure erupt in your abdomen, and it almost feels like too much, the way she’s fucking into you so hard. but deep down, you wanted this, wanted her to put you in your place. you wanted to fail that quiz so you could be where you are right now— legs shaking, pussy clenched against her strap. it was so wrong, but it felt so right.

a moan passes through your plump lips, and it makes billie’s frustration with you only worse. it’s like something snaps in her, the pace that she’s fucking you at almost seeming inhumane as your ass collides with her thighs, the sound echoing off of the classroom’s walls.

“such a dirty whore,” billie growls, her lips right against your ear, “know you could do much better in my class, but you’re just so distracted… may have to have a talk with the counselor, hm? do you need to be switched to another teacher?”

“n-no! miss eilish…please, wanna stay with you…wanna stay in your class…” you whine pathetically, and billie chuckles at how desperate you look.

tears find themselves streaming down your cheeks as you feel your orgasm closer and closer, your pussy clenching around the strap sporadically. almost inaudible whines leave your lips as you fight to stay upright, “i-i’m close— m’gonna cum, please, i—“

“cum for me.” billie orders, though her voice still drips honey. her hand snakes between your legs to rub your clit, assisting you through your orgasm as you heave, your cum sticky and hot as it races down the length of billie’s strap and onto her thighs.

billie fucks into you slowly a few more times before pulling out, watching as your cum seeps out of your cunt and onto your clit, glistening in the dim lighting of her classroom. billie gives you a kiss on your back, “good job, my girl— took me so fucking well.”

you thank her through puffy lips and teary eyes, laying on your back on her desk as she flips your paper over, writing a new grade on the front.

A+. Good job. :)

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[mika-no-sekai-blog]

One bed

Azriel x reader

Word count: 3000+

Summary: Due to unforeseen circumstances, you end up in the same room as Azriel

Warnings: none

I'd love to say I have solved the Frozen thingy, but I haven't yet. I've started writing part 3 and that's where I stopped because of the madness around. I was so close to making a solid plan for it. Unfortunately, the work happened, then Christmas at work baking f***ing chicken farm. Then husband got fever🙄and he couldn't live without getting someone else sick as well, so now son has high fever too and I'm the last one somehow surviving here. At least I have whole week of holidays next week. I hoped to relax and write more, but we'll see. Wish me luck🥴

Anyway here's something small and not so angsty that just popped up suddenly. Hope you enjoy it.

And for everyone who celebrate, have a peaceful holiday 💕

"I thought I've reserved enough rooms," Rhysand sighed. The last hour he was talking with the owner of the inn we were staying at, trying all possible tactics to persuade him to find us one more room. Impossible task from the very beginning as the inn was full.

We were on non-official official mission. At first, there were only six of us supposed to go as Amren declined, intending to stay with Mor in Velaris, protecting it. However, the two of them had yet another quarrel recently, which led to Amren suddenly appearing with a packed bag in hand a few seconds before intended departure. Nobody, not even Rhys, had balls to tell her no. And that's why we ended up in this situation. Rhys had everything perfectly planned, as usual, but he couldn't have known this would happen. And now we were one room short, but again - nobody dared to tell aloud whose fault it was. Amren was like hungry bulldog, ready to tear to shreds anyone and anything at the best of her days. Now, she was pissed off.

Feyre and Nesta took their keys, Feyre giving me an apologetic look. From the start, they were supposed to share rooms with their mates. This was also kind of vacation for us, so it was only logical they wanted to be with their partners.

That left Rhys with last two keys in hand. Amren snatched one and without looking at anyone or even a small mumbled sorry, she left. We exchanged look and whole group finally relaxed.

"Sorry," Feyre murmured as she headed to her room with sorrowful expression.

Before she left, Nesta gazed at me with silent question and I nodded. I would be fine, for sure. Cassian winked at me as he followed her. They both knew about the feelings I had for Azriel for quite some time, each supporting me in their own way. At this point, probably everyone around knew, except for the mentioned Shadowsinger and I didn't plan to be the one to break the news. I knew my limits and he was off them.

Rhys turned to me and Azriel with sorrowful expression, brows furrowed. "I'm sorry, Az, but you know.. Ladies first," he offered me the last key. Spymaster didn't even as much as blink, no protests at all. He looked as his usual self, unbothered by the problem at the hand.

"Thankies," I smiled, took the key and looped hand to Azriel's arm. "Come."

They both opened mouth in surprise, none of them expecting this from me. Rhys recovered as first.

"Enjoy yourself," he smirked and I rolled my eyes.

"Ha ha ha, how funny," I stuck out tongue at him. He chuckled and hurried after his mate, leaving the two of us alone. I raised brow at Shadowsinger who was still too shocked to speak. He didn't even notice Rhys' teasing.

"What? Did you think I would let you sleep on roof or what?"

"B-b-but," he stammered, his cheeks dusted with pink.

"No buts. Come!" I had to pull reluctant Azriel down the hallway.

"I can try another inn-"

"Nonsense! You would miss all the fun. Plus, I really don't mind. We are friends after all. I have nothing to be afraid of, right?"

I came to a sudden stop, realizing something.

"Wait! You mind staying with me in the same room?"

Before, it didn't occur to me that he could be against. I thought we were getting along pretty well, given the fact that we tended to seek out each other's company, sitting together and talking. The two of us even often hung out in the city, venturing cafes and bakeries. I thought he liked to spend time with me, but it could be only my mistaken impression. I knew I couldn't hope for more than friendship and I was fine with that as long as I could be close to him. He could feel differently though.

"No!" he hurried with an answer, eyes wide. "No, nothing like that. It's just.."

"What is it?"

"It's just.. you are female and I'm male."

I was so relieved to hear that, that I wanted to laugh, but I didn't. "That means that you will pounce on me like an animal as soon as door close?"

He flushed fiercely, averting his eyes. "You know I will do no such a thing. It just means that you might be uncomfortable because of that."

"I'm fine. Believe me," I said softly and took his hand. "So come on, silly."

He chuckled and this time, he willingly followed me.

The room, we got, was quite a nice one for an old inn, but it was rather smaller one. Most of the space was occupied by bed big enough to accommodate Illyrian wings. It was one of the reasons Rhysand chose this place, thinking about the comfort of his brothers. We were supposed to spend here whole week, maybe longer, so it was necessary.

Except of bed, there was only small table with two old chairs, hearth and connected bathroom.

After we settled down, the air had somehow thickened, both of us suddenly embarrassed. And so I did what I could to lighten the atmosphere a bit, but every try for a conversation died out soon after it started. At last, I gave up.

"It was long day," I stretched out, all my joints making a satisfying cracking sound and Azriel grimaced. He didn't like when I did it. "I'm tired. Do you want to use the bathroom as first?"

"No, go ahead," he offered and started to line up on table all the daggers he had on him. I paused and watched him, amazed. How could he hide so many? I thought he had only two, max three. He noticed me and smiled shyly.

"I'll clean them while you take shower. Don't worry, I'll put them away afterwards."

"I don't mind them at all," I mumbled, ashamed I got caught. "I'm just stunned you managed to sneak in the whole arsenal. Seeing it now, I would bet that not only do you have one for each of us but also even one spare."

At that he finally laughed, the rich sound warming my heart. I already missed that sound. Corners of my mouth curled into satisfied smile and I quickly gathered all necessary things and went to the bathroom.

When I came out, the daggers were gone from the table. Azriel was seated on the same chair he occupied since we came, pyjama in hands. He was staring into space, looking somehow troubled. Shadows gathered around his ear and he looked up at me, faking smile. Without a word, he stood up and hurried to the bathroom.

While I was waiting, I shoved my used underwear to the bottom of my bag and climbed to the bed, snuggling up in a warm blanket. It was quite cold here, old window hardly blocking the cold wind from outside.

Azriel took quite long to finish. By the time bathroom door creaked open, I was almost asleep. He rustled around for a while and adding big log to the fire, he turned off lights. I waited. The room went completely silent.

I opened eyes. "Are you kidding me," I sat up, sighing. "Az, I thought, we already talked it out." I glared into a dark corner by the hearth.

"Don't worry about me and sleep," he replied from his place on the old chair.

"You can't sleep on that old crap. It will most likely give in soon." The only answer was silence.

"C'mon, Az. It won't do you any good if you're sleep-deprived. To none of us in fact. What if something happens and you won't be able to fight because you are too tired and sore?"

Again silence.

"Do you want me to help you to the bed? I warn you, I'm going to drag you here not by arm but by ear this time."

He chuckled. His wings rustled and mattress dipped under his weight. "Fine then. Have it your way."

I tucked him in like a small child, mindful of his wings and settled down, heart pounding in my throat.

"That wasn't necessary."

"Believe me it was. And don't try to fake it. I'm light sleeper. I will know if you get up in the middle of the night."

"Fine, fine." He sounded amused. He was lying on his back, wings folded and tugged close to his body.

"Relax. The bed is enough big for both of us. Even if you touch me. I'm not made of sugar, I won't melt into puddle," I assured him as I curled up on my side of bed with back to him, taking as little space as possible so he had enough comfort. He made a sound at the back of his throat.

I thought I wouldn't be able to sleep at all with him being so close. But as bed warmed up with his presence and his calming scent wrapped around me as another blanket, I fell asleep in no time.

* * *

Azriel didn't even blink an eye. He was just lying there, stretched on his back, gazing at ceiling. He wasn't used to falling asleep next to someone. After she reassured him, he relaxed a bit but only his body. He was too nervous and excited at the same time. He was scared to even breath, not wanting to wake her up. How could she sleep so soundly? Didn't she feel the same? Didn't his presence stir her nerves?

Shadows curled on pillow near his ear, whispering. They described him in detail how she drifted off with sweet smile on her lips. Smile that she was still wearing. He wished he could see it with his own eyes.

He dared to turn his head to the side to watch her back, her shoulder slightly rising with every breath. Even at place like this in the middle of nowhere, she kept smelling like field of spring flowers, delicate and sweet. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the moment.

He felt so lucky right now and thanked the Mother for sending Amren at last minute, giving him this opportunity. For years, he was trying to get closer to Y/N. No matter how many times, he was ready to tell her about his feelings, he always gave up in the end, not daring to even suggest it. She was everything he wasn't, beautiful, kind and perfect. She deserved better.

He watched her entire night, mesmerized. It was strange. She was always so energetic during the day, yet at night she didn't move at all. It made him wonder whether it was because of him or it was normal.

It was after the sunrise when he finally calmed down and dozed off for hour or two.

* * *

Three days later, a knock sounded on our door. We were just finishing off the lasts of our breakfast. We looked up in time to see Rhysand's head peeking in. He held hand over his eyes with sassy smirk on his lips.

"Can I come in? I wouldn't like to see something inappropriate."

I rolled my eyes while Azriel bid him in, unaffected by his teasing. Honestly, everyone was making fun of us for no reason. After the first night, Nesta pulled me aside to ask me how it went and how I felt. I had nothing to tell her. At least nothing interesting anyway. I slept like a baby and not only the first night, but every night after.

Every evening, Azriel dutifully took his side of bed and I curled up on mine. No touching, only a pleasant small chat between friends. It was noticeable that he didn't sleep much the first night, however after that, he didn't seem to have such troubles. I was glad for that.

"I came to inform you that finally one more room is available. If you want, one of you can take it," he grinned and waited for our reply with one brow raised.

Out of the corner of eye, I looked at Azriel who was already eyeing me with unreadable expression. It seemed he wouldn't speak and it was up to me to decide.

"Well.. I don't mind to share room with Az at all. But if you'd like to have your privacy.." I turned to him.

His eyes widened slightly and his lips moved without making a sound.

"I don't mind, too," he managed.

"So," Rhys dragged the word. "You want to stay together? Really?"

We nodded as one man, not willing to give him what he hoped for. He was visibly disappointed.

"Fine then," he sighed, "as you want. I'll inform the owner."

* * *

A week later we were so used to this situation and each other's presence that we returned to our usual selves, rambling about anything, laughing, even touching lightly.

Our mission was over and this was our last night of sharing room. Azriel was spread on bed next to me, his wing gently touching my back. I was slowly falling asleep while we did small talk. Somewhere between dream and reality I got idea. Crazy as it was, my sleepy brain didn't find anything strange or wrong with it and my body acted on its own.

With closed eyes I rolled to his side, wrapped arm around his waist and rested my head on his chest. Azriel made a surprised sound and stiffened, but he didn't try to push me away. His smell filled my nose, his warmth seeping into me. Frantic but steady melody of his heart lulled me deeper into sleep. Last thing I felt before I completely drifted off, was his body relaxing under me and his arm holding me close.

* * *

Azriel was so surprised, he couldn't think straight. What was happening? He touched Y/N lightly, yet she didn't mind. She was almost asleep, relaxed and seemingly comfortable with him as her pillow. He felt her smiling into his chest and that gave him courage to wrap his hands around her. She hummed with satisfaction and dozed off completely.

Azriel gazed at her, unsure what to think or feel. Naturally, it made him happy, a dream-come-true kind of situation, but was it really okay? Was it really happening? It seemed to him just like a figment of his imagination, fed by amazing week spent by her side, so close to her.

He pinched himself, really painfully, leaving a bruise on his forearm. It was real. He swallowed hard. Slowly small smile spread on his face. He could get used to this.

When the initial surprise and embarrassment had passed, he found himself enjoying this. His heart was pounding fast, as he touched her hair and pushed them aside to see her face. He couldn't help it and traced a single finger down her face and jaw, mapping her full lips, lovely nose and soft arches of her brows.

He chuckled lightly. Y/N didn't even stir. So much to a light-sleeper.

As he watched her, his fantasy took over, offering him all kinds of imaginary situations that could lead to them ending up in this position; from innocent snuggling together for the night to them being naked, covered in sweat and spent after good sex. His heart squeezed in pain. He loved it and wanted it all. He didn't even realize that he was tugging her closer and closer, holding her so firmly there was no space left between them.

Despite everything, the scenario of innocent snuggling immediately became his favourite one. It held a certain kind of peace and warmth, something he longed for the most. He kept replaying it again and again until he fell asleep, too. The fantasy followed him even to his dreams where it became so real that it was unbearable.

* * *

I woke up unusually early at dawn. Still drowsy I looked around, not comprehending where I was. I was warm and comfy, so ready to close my eyes again, until I notice rising and falling steady flesh under me. That completely woke me up.

I looked up, finding Azriel still fast asleep. He was smiling sweetly, yet the tears rolled down his cheeks, soft whimpers leaving his lips. My chest tightened at the sight. It hurt me to see him like this. I reached up and gently wiped the tears off.

He slowly opened eyes and looked at me, still smiling.

"Good morning," I whispered.

"'Morning, Y/N," he replied, his deep voice raspy in the most sexy way. His thumb started to move up and down my waist in soothing motion.

"Bad dreams?"

"Sometimes dreams can be so beautiful that they make one cry," he murmured. He sounded so sad that I felt like crying too. Instead, I placed both of my hands on his chest and rested my chin on top of them.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I searched his eyes.

He shook his head and wiped off the rest of his tears. "I just wish I could go back and keep having the same dream for the rest of my life," he sighed, his eyes never leaving my face.

I propped up on my elbow and caressed his cheek. "You know that dreams don't have to stay dreams. They can became reality if you want them to."

His eyes widened and he swallowed hard. He seemed to be thinking very hard about something. Determination filled his eyes and he lifted up his head, stopping an inch from my face, waiting.

It was so sudden that I held my breath, but I didn't pull away. Watching me closely, Azriel leaned even closer and his lips lightly grazed over mine. I moaned, my body acting on its own. My eyes closed and I firmly pressed my lips to his. All the years of my suppressed feelings poured into this one kiss, not believing that there would be any more. He groaned and opened up, slowly moving, testing the waters. His fingers dug into flesh of my waist, holding me impossibly close.

It ended as suddenly as it started. He reluctantly broke the kiss and rested his forehead against mine, heaving.

"I want it to become real."

[st4rrzynight]

𝐈 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔, 𝐈’𝐌 𝐒𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐘 — 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐬

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 — 𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐠𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐫, 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐛𝐞𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭– 𝐧𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐧𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐚𝐟𝐚𝐫

𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

ʳᵉᵃᵈᵉʳˢ ᵖᵒᵛ

𝟏𝟎:𝟓𝟑 𝐏𝐌. i anxiously stared at the time on my phone. it has almost been an hour and paige still hasn't shown up. tonight is my birthday, she promised she'd show up after she washed up from tonights game.

i'm looking around as my friends converse around me in my apartment. my roommates have already questioned me on the absence of my girlfriend. i wish i knew why she wasn't here either.

i enter the passcode to my phone in a hurry as i pull up her contact and type out a message.

Paige 💜🫶

hey, where are you? everyone’s asking about you... are you on your way?

i'm so sorry, babe. i can’t make it.

what?

i know, i know. I feel awful about it, but something came up the team wanted me to come celebrate tonights win with them

its my birthday paige you promised you would be here. going out with the team is suddenly more important than your girlfriends birthday?

it's not just "going out". it's to celebrate tonights win, and it's kind of a big deal. if i don't show up, it could look bad. i don't want to let them down, you have to understand.

no paige, i don’t understand. I’m standing here, surrounded by my friends, and i have to keep making excuses as to why you’re not here. do you know how embarrassing that is? to not have my own girlfriend show up to celebrate my birthday??

i'm sorry, okay? i’ll make it up to you. i’ll take you out somewhere nice tomorrow just the two of us, yeah?

no paige it’s not about “making it up.” it’s about showing up when you say you will. but you NEVER do.

that’s not fair. you know how much pressure i’m under i just want to celebrate the win, look i'll make it up to you tomorrow i promise.

paige i am so tired of this. seriously, you keep making empty promises, you get my hopes up only for you to tell me a half assed excuse that you pulled straight out of your ass last minute.

please don’t do this right now. i’ll call you after i leave.

don’t bother, we're done.

what??

read 10:56

what do you mean were done??

read 10:58

y/n answer me please baby

read 10:59

please ill do anything ill make it up to you i promise please answer my message baby

⚠︎︎ not delivered

꥟

ᵖᵃⁱᵍᵉˢ ᵖᵒᵛ

two years. 730 days. i lost her two years ago today, i lost it all. i know it was my fault, i put everything above her and i deeply regret it. now i have to live life in regret watching from the sidelines as she celebrates her birthday once again. this time, with her girlfriend.

her laugh filling the air knowing i used to be the cause of that laughter. admiring her from across the bar, sitting in between my teammates as they make conversation yet i can't bring myself to take my eyes off of her.

i scan ever inch of her body my eyes stopped on her wrist, then her fingers, then her neck. every single piece of jewelry i got her, gone. none of it in sight as if it never existed.

a hand on her thigh from a woman who was a copy of me. blonde, blue eyes, tall, and she plays soccer. but its not me. it will never be me again.

i can't even blame her, thats why i hate it. i hate that i can't hate her no matter how hard i try because in the end i will always love her and it will always be her.

even if i'm not her happy ever after. i distract myself trying to find someone new but it never ends well. i always find similarities between the girls i've gone on dates with and her. thats what attracts me to them, the fact that they slightly even look like her. but they will never compare to her full look, no one will.

so for the rest of time ill find myself watching from the sidelines seeing her take on life with someone who isn't me by her side, someone who looks like me but is not entirely me.

it will always kill me, it's going to eat me alive till i die. knowing that i'm not hers anymore, i won't be looking for her in the student section knowing shes there. instead ill be looking for her in the student section in hopes she decided to show up, but i know she didn't. she's going to be in the student section of the soccer games watching and cheering on her.

i won't be able to buy her flowers anymore, instead i watch as she gets gifted flowers by another woman. except those aren't her favorite. they're the wrong flowers.

i wont be able to buy her the perfume she always wears when it runs out, her signature scent that i always loved. instead i watch as she gets gifted perfume by another woman. she sprays it into the air and by the time it reaches where i sit i know its not the one she loves. its the wrong perfume.

i won't be making late night sephora trips, picking out her favorite makeup products when shes running low. instead i watch as she gets gifted makeup by another woman. its the wrong brand.

because of my mistakes, ones that i regret so deeply, i now live with the gnawing feeling knowing that she now loves a woman who doesn't pay attention to small details and gifts her all the wrong things, on her birthday of all days, but she showed up. i didn't.

clearly i lacked attention to detail as well if i couldn't see how much i truly disappointed and hurt her and didn't even show up. i wish it went down differently.

every shooting star, every coin toss into a fountain, every time the clock hits 11:11, every fallen eyelash, every dandelion, my last two birthdays, my only wish was to have her back.

but i cant.

not anymore.

and it hurts.

i open up my phone clicking on her contact, i type out one last message, even if i know she won't ever get it. i type it out and send it as some type of closure.

𝐢 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐢'𝐦 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲.

⚠︎︎ not delivered

𝐚/𝐧 — 𝐧𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐢𝐟 𝐢 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐍𝐎 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲, 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐦𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫

𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝, 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐮𝐩 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐢𝐭.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 —

@uwupaige @jadasogay @sweetluna20

[revelboo]

Im not sure if these are updated based on request or based on your whimsy, but if it *is* request based, may I please beg for Ironhide? I love the old man >.<

If not, feel free to ignore and I will continue to patiently wait :) 👍

Love u so much for this blog; it gets me through the work day.

Honestly, it’s mostly based on people reminding me in the asks that I’ve neglected a character or story, because I’m not motivated enough to make a posting schedule I know I won’t stick to and those asks are sitting at over 300 at this point 😂 no matter how fast I go through them

Hold Me Down Pt 4

Ironhide x Reader

• “Rules,” he growls, servos flexing as you scowl up at him from where he’d unceremoniously dumped you on his cluttered desk. “You’re going to behave. Primus help you if I catch your sticky little fingers on anything that’s not yours.” And you’re looking around, ignoring him. Smacking a hand on the desk to make you jump and glare, he grins. “Act like a sparkling and I’ll treat you like one, darling.”

• Eyes narrowing at the big, red jerk, you curl your lip at him. He’d made it abundantly clear that you’re not getting away. That you’re stuck with each other and that he hates it. Well, that’s fine. The hate is pretty much mutual. He’d tried to give you a heart attack after all. And, okay, maybe you’d been trying to steal him at the time, but how were you supposed to know he wasn’t a real van? If anything, this is his fault. And what is a sparkling? Sounds like an insult. One thing you have figured out? He can’t hurt you or you’re pretty sure he’d have chucked you out while driving and that makes you brave to cover up the fear. “Look, demon van,” you say ignoring his pointed ‘it’s Ironhide.’ “You kidnapped me, so I have every right to make you miserable. And I’m going to enjoy it.”

• You’re grinning at him, no longer putting him in mind of a sparkling. No, they’re at least innocent. You’re a vicious little scraplet, all teeth and evil. “Try me.” Because he’s not putting up with any sass or attitude and unfortunately, you seem to be nothing but. He almost liked you better screaming. Bending slightly to get on your level, he reaches out and taps you on the head with a servo. Grimacing as you slap at him, swearing. Maybe gentler next time, he decides as you rub your head to send your hair into disarray. “I’d behave a little better if I was your size.”

• “Well, I’d punt you across the room if I was your size,” you mutter, rubbing your head. He’d thumped you hard enough to hurt. “Jerk. Demon van. Asshole.” Those big servos flex into a fist and you shut up. Know he can’t hit you, but the threat? Cringing and hating yourself for it, you glare up at him, heart racing.

• That shut you up, but it twists unpleasantly through him, too. That fear in your eyes so raw. It’s the look of someone expecting a blow because it’s familiar, cringing but still defiant. Resigned. “Look,” he grumbles, sitting down and suddenly exhausted. “I’m not going to hurt you, but you can ease up on the back talk.” Lips pressing into a thin line, you just shrug. Right. Brat. “If you haven’t noticed, I’m not cut out for taking care of sparklings.” And far too old for it besides.

• That word again. You’re beginning to suspect what it means and it’s not flattering. “You understand that I’m an adult, right?” When he just stares, you swallow a laugh. “I’m not a kid, pal. I’ve been on my own for years and I don’t need taking care of.” Or want it. Relying on other people, trusting them to look out for you, to have your back can only come back to bite you. The only one you can count on is you. You’ve learned that the hard way. Anything else just gets you hurt and you’re so sick of pain.

Previous

You hold me down

You're the echoes of my everything,

You're the emptiness the whole world sings at night.

You're the laziness of afternoon,

[da-enasalin]

Bioware has been getting a lot of flack recently and I just thought I'd share some ideas I've had about it recently.

One thing that has been bothering me about the discussion around Veilguard is that people are criticising it for the past games not having a big enough effect. Bioware has always touted themselves as a games company that has mastered the art of connecting plot lines through multiple games but, while I think it's true for Mass Effect, has never been the case with Dragon age.

Origins was designed to be entirely self contained and that shows.

Dragon Age 2 was made in a tremendous rush and that shows.

Inquisition was made with little care for the past games besides the themes / concepts and that shows.

Veilguard was made as a rushed attempt to refresh a franchise that lost itself near immediately and it shows.

This isn't me saying Dragon Age is overall bad, you would never catch me saying that in a million years, but if you have any love for the franchise you have to admit that the games have never been stable and likely never will be. A huge thing in the Dragon Age fandom is that we just don't know what parts of the lore from Origins are still accurate to what Bioware is considering cannon and I think that's one of the best examples of how Bioware don't really know what they're doing when it comes to making Dragon Age. (I say this with love)

I enjoy exploring Thedas, interacting with the people in it and developing my own ideas from what is shown to me from these games. Thedas itself being so malleable is what first drew me into Dragon Age as it is. Nothing is concrete. No one knows everything. Any piece of information you hear could very easily be false.

People are allowed to interpret Veilguard anyway they want because that's always been what Dragon Age has encouraged us to do.

The one thing that I do think is unfair is when people say that the import choices for Veilguard is what makes it bad compared to previous Dragon Age games. I genuinely can't think of a single point in any Dragon Age game where your choices in previous games has an actual impact to the point that I generally use default world states when playing.

If we want to be criticising Veilguard for being under baked then we should be criticising EA for not letting Bioware do their own thing. I have the art book for Veilguard, I've read through the Joplin section and I really would give anything for that to have been the game we got but it isn't and the fault for that lies with EA forcing Bioware to restart Dragon Age 4 god knows how many times.

Just remember it could have been a live service game. That really would have been the end of Dragon Age. Veilguard isn't nearly as hellish as people make it out to be and I really do think that something like what happened to the general opinion of Dragon Age 2 will happen to Veilguard.

[the-writerwoman]

Happy holidays 🎅🏻🎄🎁☃️ I bring you the gift of angst!

Another 4am brainrot as my baby kept me up most of the night.

In this one, Logan and Wade fight against a mutant, not knowing that they can go through time and send people through time. Logan ends up getting sent back in time. To 2016, but he doesn’t know it until he tries to regroup at Sister Margaret’s and Weasel doesn’t know who he is. He waits for Wade anyway, but instead of the red leather clad weirdo he was used to, in walked the unblemished, full head of haired mercenary. Before he met Vanessa, before he got his cancer diagnosis. Logan was in trouble. Especially when Wade finds out that Logan is the very wolverine he’d admired as a kid, and he declares them soulmates and tries to chase after him and if Logan’s not careful, then the whole of Wade’s future could be changed.

This scene is after Wade finds out Logan is from the future, and what the consequences could be if the future was changed.

Hope you enjoy!

——————————

The tension in the room was suffocating as Logan stood there, clenching and unclenching his fists. Wade’s chest felt tight as he waited for Logan to say something, anything, that could make sense of the situation.

“I don’t know,” Logan said finally, his voice raw. “I shouldn’t be telling you any of this. The timeline is delicate, Wade. If you decide not to go through with the program, or if you don’t fall in love with Vanessa when you’re supposed to, everything changes. Everything goes wrong.”

Wade frowned, stepping closer, his voice low. “What does that mean, Logan? Why does it all matter so much? I don’t even know a Vanessa.”

Logan hesitated, the pain in his eyes evident as he looked at Wade. “Because if you don’t become who you’re meant to be, you won’t be the man who saves me. You won’t pull me out of my universe when it matters most. And if that doesn’t happen…”

Logan’s voice cracked, and he looked away, his hands curling into fists. “Then I stay in my world.”

Wade tilted his head, his chest aching at the sight of Logan’s visible anguish. “What’s so bad about staying in your world?”

Logan let out a shaky breath, his shoulders sagging under the weight of the question. “If I stay in my world… I spend the rest of my life hated. Hunted. Spat on. I’ve worked on it. I know I’m not to blame, but in my world, the X-Men were attacked while I wasn’t there. I came back to find them all… gone.”

Wade’s heart sank, his breath catching as Logan’s voice broke.

“Jean, Scott… even the kids,” Logan continued, his voice trembling. “All of them. Dead. And I wasn’t there to stop it.”

Wade’s stomach twisted painfully as Logan paused, swallowing hard.

“I lost it,” Logan admitted, his voice thick with guilt. “The rage took over, and I… I killed people. People who didn’t deserve it. I let it consume me.” His shoulders shook slightly, and when he looked back at Wade, there were tears glistening in his eyes. “It doesn’t matter how much time passes. I’ll always be the man who let them die.”

Wade couldn’t take it anymore. He crossed the room in two strides and pulled Logan into a hug. Logan froze for a moment, his breath catching, before his arms wrapped tightly around Wade. He clung to him as if Wade were the only thing holding him together, his breaths shaky against Wade’s neck.

“It’s not your fault,” Wade murmured, his voice soft but firm. “None of it is your fault, Logan.”

Logan didn’t say anything, but the way his grip tightened spoke volumes. Wade held him closer, his own chest aching at the thought of this version of Logan, so broken, so weighed down by guilt and grief.

After a while, Wade gently pulled back, his hands resting on Logan’s shoulders. He tilted his head, pressing a soft kiss to Logan’s temple, a quiet, comforting gesture. Logan closed his eyes at the contact, his breathing still uneven.

Wade’s lips hovered for a moment before he shifted, catching Logan’s lips in a soft, tentative kiss. It was gentle at first, a question rather than a demand. Logan didn’t pull away, but he didn’t respond either, as if he were frozen in place.

When Wade pressed again, Logan responded tentatively, then with more certainty. His hands found Wade’s waist, grounding himself in the moment. For a fleeting moment, everything felt right.

But then Logan pulled back with a sharp breath, his eyes wide. “We can’t,” he said, his voice strained.

Wade blinked, his heart pounding. “Why not?”

Logan shook his head, though his hands didn’t leave Wade’s waist. “Because… if we do this, if I let this happen, it could ruin everything. The timeline, the future, it’s too risky.”

Wade’s jaw tightened, and he reached up to cup Logan’s face, forcing him to meet his gaze. “Logan, listen to me. I’ll do it. Everything I’m supposed to. The program, the torture, hell, I’ll even fall in love with this Vanessa when the time comes, if that’s what it takes. But don’t push me away. Not now. Not when I have you right here.”

Logan looked at him, his resolve visibly crumbling. “Wade…”

“Please,” Wade whispered, his voice trembling. “If this is all we get, if this is all we’re allowed, then let us have it. Just this once.”

Logan closed his eyes, his jaw clenching. Wade didn’t give him time to argue. He leaned in again, capturing Logan’s lips in another kiss, more desperate this time. Logan groaned softly, his hands gripping Wade’s waist as he finally gave in.

[carletes]

oh how about carlando cockwarming?

It was because Carlos was as sweet, considerate, and careful as he was that Lando loved when he wasn’t. And mostly, it was Lando’s fault. He pushed Carlos, liked making his eyes flash, liked seeing how far he could go before Carlos’ resolve broke.

But sometimes, Lando didn’t have to do anything at all. Like one day, when Lando was in a conference call, late at night, irritated because it was cold and he wanted to be in bed. Duty called, and so did timezones, so Lando had to crawl out of his comfortable bed, from beside his hot boyfriend, stand in the living room. Staring at the swirling snow outside. Forehead gently banging against the window.

Which was why he was able to see Carlos approaching, his reflection drawing closer to Lando’s.

Lando glanced back with an apologetic grimace. He put himself on mute and said, “Did I wake you up? I’m sorry, babe.”

“It was cold,” Carlos said instead, and Lando was too distracted to notice, then, the look in Carlos’ eyes.

“Yeah. Freezing out there. D’you wanna hike up the heat?”

But Carlos just went to the couch, their large sectional, and laid down in it. He patted the space in front of him. Lando shook his head. “I have the meeting.”

“Come here.”

“Carlos, I’ll be there when I can–”

“Lando.”

And Lando shut up immediately. Carlos was looking at him intently, his voice sharp. Then he said, less sharp but still commanding, and fuck that went straight to Lando’s dick: “Ven aquí.”

Lando immediately walked over. He sat down in front of the sectional, phone still clenched in his hands, AirPods in his ears, and knelt, gazing at Carlos.

“Sorry, daddy.”

“Good boy,” Carlos said. “Strip for me.”

Lando did. He set his phone aside and took his sweatshirt off, careful not to jostle his AirPods, then kicked off his sweatpants. He was naked, shivering slightly in the cold, AirPods incongruous against his nudity—but he knew Carlos liked that. Liked that Lando could be the CEO in his own world while Carlos (at least sometimes) called the shots in their shared world, simultaneously.

“I’m cold,” Carlos said, his voice calm, even. “I need you to warm me up.”

“How, daddy?” Lando asked, eager to please, desperate to please. He knelt down in front of Carlos again and made a high, desperate noise as Carlos ran a hand through his curls.

“So pretty,” Carlos murmured, and Lando glowed with the praise. “Turn around and get on your hands and knees for me.”

Lando did. In his ears, whoever he was speaking with (it didn’t matter, he didn’t care) was saying something about profit margins against marketing costs, and Lando was just aware enough to know he needn’t be concerned. He presented himself to Carlos, and Carlos leaned over and ran a broad, large hand over Lando’s ass. It was an appraisal. Lando was hard with it. He spread Lando’s ass, and Lando moaned softly.

“You don’t need any preparation,” Carlos said, satisfied. “Tell me why?”

“Because you fucked me so good before bed, daddy,” Lando explained, flush with pride. It was good, Carlos fucking Lando from below while Lando gasped above him, coming over Carlos’ abs without warning as Carlos just grinned delightedly.

“That’s right. Do you want to do something for me?”

“Anything,” Lando said, turning back around, wanting Carlos’ approval more than anything. Carlos put a thumb to Lando’s lips and Lando opened his mouth.

“Like I said. I’m cold,” Carlos said. “I’m going to warm my cock in your little asshole.”

Lando moaned. It was embarrassing. He should have been embarrassed. But he wasn’t. He just nodded over and over, whispering, “Please. Please.”

“Please what?”

“Please use me. Daddy. However you want.”

“That’s my good boy,” Carlos said, and he patted the couch again. Lando immediately slipped in, back against Carlos’ chest, and Carlos wrapped an arm around Lando and pulled him into position. “Baby boy. Perfect for me.”

And without warning, Carlos pushed into Lando, his cock thick and wonderful and insistent. Lando mewled, eyes fluttering.

“Lando, you still there?”

Goddammit.

“Answer your people, Lando,” Carlos said quickly, right into Lando’s ear. His cock, his cock, it felt so good. “You have daddy’s permission.”

Shaking, Lando scrambled for his phone and unmuted himself. He cleared his throat.

“I’m here. Everything sounds good so far. I think we can launch the campaign in a month.”

“Glad you agree. We have a couple more things to discuss, and then we should be good to wrap up.”

Lando muted himself just as Carlos whispered, “My impressive Lando. My successful Lando. Do they know you’re just a cockwarmer at home?”

Lando’s cock twitched with that. He bit his lip and shook his head.

“Do they know who fucks you every night?”

Every inch of Lando’s body ached to push back against Carlos, fuck himself on Carlos. But he was a good cockwarmer. He wouldn’t move.

“Yes, daddy,” Lando said, as the men on his phone spoke about views and interactions and influence collaborations. “They’ve seen me on your arm lots of times before.”

“And if I asked you for this in front of them?” Carlos whispered, pulling Lando deeper onto him, his cock pulsing inside Lando. “If I told you to sit on my lap, let me use you like this, in the middle of a business meeting…would you?”

The vision of it. Lando sitting in Carlos as his throne, leading a meeting, his asshole full with Carlos’…

“Yes, daddy,” Lando said, and he turned and smiled at Carlos. “I’m doing it right now, aren’t I?”

And Carlos’ smile was surprisingly sweet. He leaned in and kissed Lando’s lips. “My perfect Lando. Filthy just for me.”

“Yes, daddy.”

“You can go back to your meeting, baby boy.”

“Thank you, daddy.”

Somehow, the meeting passed. Lando even made some points during it. And through it all, Carlos remained in him, almost as if he were dozing, only then he would rock into Lando and make his breath catch on a sentence.

Afterwards, when Lando had his AirPods out, his phone cast aside, Carlos pulled him in close.

“Lando. Can I fuck you now?”

And Lando grinned at Carlos, his eyes heavy with the joy of being used so. “So now you want my permission?”

“Well, you’re the boss, aren’t you?” Carlos replied smoothly. And somehow, even as Carlos began fucking him hard, his hand pumping Lando’s heavy, straining cock, Lando wondered at how Carlos made him feel in control even when he wasn’t.

Because somehow, even when he wasn’t, Carlos was as sweet, considerate, and careful as always.

[transformers87]

Ok!! Thought Dee was gunna be easy or a tad bit more simpler to draw/design

NOPE!!!

And this is my weak ass attempt at drawing Orion hiding in his neck/shoulder blade armor from the teasing Dee was giving.

Still working on the style…. Just wanna post and show off some ideas of mine.

This was after Orion helped lead Dee and escape the security drones Sentinel had placed all over the restricted archives…. They were walking back to Orion’s royal chambers… using the secret escape cavern/tunnel that was meant for Orion if the Quintesans ever found his location… and Dee being curious as to why this ghost bot went all out his way to help a poor, low-class miner like himself.

Also I know I butchered the enemy’s name!! But luckily I somehow surprisingly remember their name!!… which… it never happen!!

——————————————————

First draft!! Hope you like it!! :3

Orion kept his cloak over his helm, hoping that none of his father’s drones had found him, he shivered at the thought of having to step one ped inside their royal chambers only to be faced to face by an angry Prime…. And now his bigger problem… how to help the newcomer back to where he originated from… peering a sneaking glance from the hood of his cloak he caught sight of the mech walking in pace with his stride.

The mech was large.. much lager and taller than him… the Prince practically was a dwarf strolling near him….the mech’s color plates were a darker shade of silver and grey… his helm a deep blackish grey as well as his servos… which were large enough to tear through anything that if angered so…. The optics of the mech were a brilliant shade of golden yellow…. Blazing like fire… and filled with hope…. The prince then recognized his staring.. and went back to his pondering as he subconsciously use his servo to gently guide the mech to his chamber.

He knew that the mech is one of the thousands of other cog-less miners… all whom have either lost their lives or in the mere verge of losing it when mining for energon… he sighed knowing that the energon loss was his own fault… after all he is the mech’s prince and new leader… yet to be anyways…. It was his responsibility to find the matrix of leadership and help his father bring back victory…. But as for now all he felt was an utter failure for he was nowhere near in finding the ancient relic…

“HEY!!!” Hissed the mech, his large servo grabbing a hold of the prince’s armor and shook him stopping the prince dead in his tracks. He looked up and meekly whispered, “what is it?”

The mech beamed him a friendly smile and said a quick apology. “I wanna say is thank you for helping me ditch them drones back there sir.” Sapphire blue optics blinked for a bit and smiled behind his mask. “It’s no problem…”

The mech nodded, but glanced around the passage way curiously. “So? Where exactly are you leading us?” “you could stay in my quarters til near dawn…” “I had to wait that long?!” He said. Golden optics wide. “that way there’s enough time for the drones to stop in their rush.” The prince stated, ignoring the rude cut off from the mech.

“Why your place? And who are you?” The mech asked, eyeing him suspiciously. “My dear miner… I apologize for the lack of knowing your name… yet i cannot tell you mine due to being out in the open… and as for my home… this passage way is where we are heading for.”

“So?.. you’re not a haunted spark?” The mech questioned, his optics squinting. “No, “ he chuckled “i’m not dead… i may look a bit hauntingly but i can assure you that i am in fact still much alive…. And no i don’t haunt these tunnels” the mech laughed at the end bit. “Ok… ok… well my name is D-16… my friends and coworkers all call me Dee though…. and i am not a haunting spark either” he smiles a bit more once the prince started to laugh more.

“But what i don’t understand is why a cogged mech like yourself is helping a cog-less mech like myself?” Dee asked. The prince smiled within his mask. “Because… it’s my job to help. Why can’t i help?”

Dee sighs, “no cog bots in iacon are allowed to help a cog-less bot, much less a miner.. like me.. you could’ve lost your job or worse.” He blinked and sighs at the mech with him. “A spark is worth saving for Dee,” stated the prince

“But?-“ the prince then cut Dee off. “every bot no matter how great or small… with or without a cog..… deserves a helping hand once in a cycle… even if it meant my own spark slain… then so be it…you do matter”

He then opened the secret door that lead into his personal chambers and helped his newfound friend in

[caliluvsthe2000z]

“tutoring”

You're known for being intelligent at your school. You're usually picked to answer questions. You think you're pretty decent in academics, but not that good.

Because of your intelligence you were chosen to be a tutor for an after school study hall session that students with bad grades were supposed to attend. The instructor told you to go help Christopher Sturniolo. He was told to study for a test but didn't want to.

You went and took a seat at a desk beside Chris. He was running his fingers through his messy brown hair. You could tell that he was frustrated then he finally gave up and sat back in his chair.

"Y'know I'm not gonna do this, right?"

“You have to Christopher.”

"No I don't, actually. I can ditch if I want."

He closed his textbook and sat back in his chair, stretching, making himself comfortable.

“Yeah you can if you wanna repeat being a freshman.”

"It's the end of the year anyway and I'm passing a few of my classes with a C or better. If I fail a class it doesn't make me flunk."

“Christopher. the principal gave me a paper with your grades on it and you’re failing almost everything. Don’t say you have a C or better.”

Chris looked off to the side, a little embarrassed. It was true, he was failing all his classes. It wasn't his fault, he was having a hard time coping with his own life. He didn't want to admit that though.

"It doesn't matter, I'll just go to summer school, or something."

“You wont get anything done there Christopher.”

Chris shrugged. He was too stubborn to admit he needed the help. He didn't want to deal with this right now.

"Fine. Let's get it over with, I guess."

He grumbled, opening the textbook back up to a page you told him to look at. He was obviously still annoyed.

Cali pointed to the text where he left off.

“Read that one.”

she was talking in a soft tone because she knew that he was just gonna get frustrated and give up again.

Chris groaned, rolling his eyes before reading out loud. Reading wasn't his strong suit, but he wasn't a terrible reader. He read the text in a lazy, uninterested tone.

“Hey I know you don’t wanna be here but if you wanna get better you have to try. Please?”

Christopher sighed, annoyed. He sat up fully in his chair, dropping his casual, laid-back demeanor from before.

He looked straight at you, clearly frustrated.

"Why do you care anyway? You don't even know me that well. I won't be in any of your classes next year. We'll probably never see each other again once the year ends."

“Because i don’t want you to end up homeless or being nothing in life or worse.”

Christopher’s annoyed expression faded. He looked down, no longer making eye contact with you. He was a little surprised at your response. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know what would happened if he didn’t try in school. Would he even be able to improve? He didn't know, but it was too scary for him to give any effort.

“So please try Christopher.”

Chris was quiet, contemplating the choice he was being given. He didn't want to do this but it was either this or fail. He let out a small huff before looking back at the text.

"Fine. I'll try. But I can't promise it will go well."

“Thank you so much.”

At that moment she smiled for the first time. she had a beautiful smile and her dimple went out when she smiled.

Despite the whole studying thing, Chris took a moment to look at your smile, noticing your dimple. He felt a little flutter in his stomach, something he hadn't felt before. He quickly looked down at the textbook, shaking himself out of it. He was supposed to be focused on studying, not paying attention to how pretty you were. He told himself to push that thought out of his mind.

"Just... just tell me what to do."

“Read this text please.”

Chris quickly shoved his thoughts out of his head and focused on the task at hand. He tried to keep his tone neutral, but his voice was a touch softer than before.

"Okay. Fine. Whatever you say"

He picked up the textbook, looking for the text you asked him to read. He found the page, reading it aloud.

“Good!”

She said it in a soft easy tone. She knew this was hard for him so she had to go easy on him.

Christopher found himself wanting you to say the word "good" again. He wanted to get praised and have you tell him he was doing a good job. He liked your voice.

He shook that thought away, telling himself to focus on the studying. Even though it had only been little while, his attitude had completely changed. He wasn't as annoyed at having to study, at least he was when he heard you praising him. He was putting an effort into the work.

"Okay, now what?"

“Write down what i say okay?”

Chris grabbed a piece of paper and a pen. He was actually willing to do this for once, not just half-heartedly going through the motions.

"Right, got it. I'll write it down."

He looked at you, waiting for you to start speaking.

When she starts reading the passage Chris tried to listen to what she was saying but her voice was just so beautiful he just couldn’t focus on what he was supposed to be writing down.

Chris tried to focus on the words, but they faded out, replaced by the sound of your voice. It was pretty. Soft. Soft and sweet, like honey. He had to focus himself back on the task at hand every few sentences.

He quickly jotted down the words you said, trying to keep up. It was difficult because he found himself listening to you instead.

“Got all that?”

Chris snapped himself out of his trance. He looked down at the paper in front of him, a little embarrassed at himself for zoning out so much.

"Uh, right, yeah. Got it."

He said, looking down at his notes, his face a tiny bit red from embarrassment at spacing out like that. The whole time he was taking notes, he had to remind himself to pay attention to what you were saying and not your voice.

“i’m so proud of you getting stuff done!”

When she said that she gave him a rub on the back. Chris’s heart gave a little flutter again when he felt your hand on his back. Nobody had given him praise like this or said they were proud of him in a long time. It felt good, even if it was just over something small like actually studying.

He took a moment to let the feeling sink in before responding. His head was still down, looking at the notes he had written.

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right, I've actually gotten stuff done today..."

“And that’s not all.”

Chris looked up, curious. He had been doing surprisingly well so far. It had gone better than he thought. He didn't expect something else.

He looked directly at you, waiting to hear what he needed to do next.

“Now you’re gonna look me in the eyes and tell me what you learned from this text right here.”

Christopher felt a pang of nervousness when you said to look you in the eyes. That would be hard because of how pretty your eyes were, as well as looking you in the eye is already nerve-wracking.

He took a quick deep breath, mustering the courage to do as you said. He looked into your eyes, trying to keep a calm focus. He suddenly couldn't remember what he had written down at all. He tried to keep it together.

"Uh... well, what I learned is..."

“Go on.”

Chris tried his hardest to focus on answering the question, but it was hard when looking into your eyes. They were just so beautiful, so pretty. He could just stare into them all day. He tried to collect his thoughts.

"Uh, right, right... well, I learned that..."

He tried to remember what he had written down, but he was so distracted by just looking at you. It was impossible to focus on what he had written down.

“Here read it again.”

Chris let out a quiet sigh, trying not to seem like he was frustrated. He knew he should be able to tell you what he had written down but he still couldn't focus. Your sweet eyes and soft voice were making it so difficult.

He looked back down at his notes. They were messy, written in a hurry. He took a moment to read through the words.

“Hey hey don’t be frustrated take deep breath’s! When she said that she moved his hair out of his face.

Christopher almost shivered slightly when he felt your fingers brush his forehead, gently moving his hair. He took a deep breath like you said, letting it out through his nose. He closed his eyes for a second, trying to calm himself.

"Okay. Okay. I'm good, I'm okay now."

“Okay now read this one.”

He took another deep breath, feeling a little more in control now. He slowly started reading, trying to keep a steady tone. He spoke clearly and slowly, putting a lot of effort into it. He wanted to impress you.

She saw that he was having trouble with pronouncing the word equivalent so she tried to help him.

“Do you need some help?”

Chris stopped reading, taking his time before answering. He was getting a little frustrated with himself, having so much trouble. He let out a quiet groan, looking at the word.

"Ugh, yeah. Equiv- equivolent."

It was getting harder to even spit out the word now. He was never good at reading. He dreaded whenever he had to read aloud, even though he just heard your voice reading perfectly. It wasn't fair, he was supposed to be the popular and good looking kid, not the one with bad study skills.

“Its okay here i’ll help you”

She said that with the most beautiful smile on her face. Chris felt like he was going to melt if he looks at you for one more second.

Chris went quiet for a moment as you help him pronounce the word. You slowly helped him say it slowly, sounding it out carefully while he repeated it multiple times.

He mumbled it under his breath as he finally said it correctly, a little frustrated he couldn't say it easily. "Equivalent... got it."

“Im so proud of you You’re doing great.”

Chris was proud that he was finally able to say the damn word. He had a small smile on his face, not realizing that it mirrored your smile from before.

He looked up at you, feeling more confident. He still didn't like studying, but he was actually getting better at it. The fact that you were complimenting him and telling him he was doing good felt good. He wasn't used to hearing that from people.

"You really think I'm doing good?"

“Yes i do you’re doing way better than before!”

Chris was surprised at how much it made him smile to hear you say that. He actually was doing well. He was not only passing the subject, he was actually getting a good understanding. He never had that happen.

He sat up straighter in his chair, no longer leaning back as he had been before. He felt motivated now. Studying was becoming less of a chore and more of something he wanted to try.

"Yeah, okay. Maybe this isn't that bad after all."

“Well study time is over see you tomorrow!”

The words "study time is over" immediately brought back that annoyed feeling in Chris’s stomach. He was doing so well, he didn't want to stop.

But then, he realised that meant he was free. He didn't have to sit and study anymore. He was kind of sad though. He wouldn't get to see you until the next day. It wasn't ideal.

"Right... uh, okay. Um, see you tomorrow then."

[euniexenoblade]

Not a real apology, because the following two paragraphs are continuing to mock me on a premise you're wrong about.

"in line with your usual behavior" the fuck are you talking about? I post smut and kink. My usual behavior isn't anything related to this. You see like five posts from across the year get handed around and you think "oh this is all she is" if you took one look at my blog until you came up in my activity it was multiple reblogs of a piss kink Xmas meme. Like, this is a drama you created, not me. You cherry picked a post about real events that have transpired because you were gonna own the dumb faggot tranny for thinking hon can be a bad word, and still instead of just saying you were wrong, you are trying to make your aggressiveness, your wrongness, my fault. It is your fault, because you came into this with a preconceived notion about me based on whatever lie you got told.

I don't call everyone terfs or Nazis. Most of my posts are domming, teasing, encouraging people to clean their rooms, and art of maids. My most popular post rn is a positivity post for trans people who have to go back home for the holidays and hide their transness. Like, you do not know anything about me and it shows. You only know what *others* portray me as for means to demonize me. If the people in your circle keep getting called terfs and Nazis, maybe you should look at your circle, and not the trans woman who is apparently getting demonized so heavily.

"if you constantly cry wolf" except I haven't. I proved I was right. It's not crying wolf when I prove it. YOU are the one who cried wolf here.

You can't even actually say "I'm sorry, this is my fault." You have to make it about what you hate about me. About some imagined slight, some inherent sin to my existence I cannot change or speak to.

Be a fucking adult and say you're fucking wrong for once and stop blaming others for your actions.

Oh my god, this has to be the absolute most ridiculous thing I've ever seen in my entire life. The trans guy you're all losing your shit about calling a nazi was probably just from southern America holy shit

[lucyvaleheart]

.

[thegoldencontracts]

Every single time someone makes Azul out to be a pathetic easily bullied guy with no ability to defend himself whatsoever an angel loses its wings falls to the ground and fucking dies.

Please remember, Azul's overblot was the exception, not the norm. He's not a pathetic little crybaby. The thing about this portrayal is that it does insinuate the idea that someone is weak and "pathetic" for having a breakdown when it's this widespread, clearly genuinely belief that a character is pathetic as evidenced by one breakdown.

Same goes for Riddle. Yes, he had a breakdown during his overblot, but with both him and Azul, that was an exception, not the norm. There are plenty of scenes where they've both shown themselves to be smug and powerful characters.

Heck, even during Azul's breakdown, he did end up displaying his true power by sucking that literal magic and talent out of all the students nearby. Leona literally stated that his Unique Magic was forbidden. Riddle was known as the Crimson Tyrant because of the way he treated others. Azul isn't going to cry every time someone insults him, case in point, the way he behaves with Jamil, who makes a habit out of it. He doesn't run off feeling hollow after every interaction, because, well, he keeps coming back! And his enthusiasm is never hankered!

Even when dealing with physically stronger individuals, like Floyd (and most twst characters let's face it most of the cast has six packs), Riddle is never afraid. It was once mentioned that he effortlessly overpowered Floyd during the opening ceremony in Beans Day. With his magic, he's not weak, and he's certainly not helpless.

Obviously, while you can write whatever you want, I just want to explain why I believe that characterization is inaccurate. I love writing fics myself, and I (a long with most fic writers I've asked) prefer writing things that seem like they could reasonably happen with the characters and/or au in question.

[skunkes]

1 week until surgery...my brain keeps trying to talk me out of it bc i dont Need it and im scared of medical environments and Pain but i have to remember this is one of the only things that has ever made me consider wanting a tattoo and also the only thing that's made me Excited For and Wanting visible scars...

And also I've been making "i want sterilization and testosterone" meltdown tweets every other week for many many years so we're scratching one off the list LOL

[martinskiseyes]

.

[yuridovewing]

like guys i promise im aware blossomfall is meant to be a glass child. i just think she’s a poorly written one lmao