#it's probably still day 3 somewhere

[starswordartblog]

Shininginktober Days 2 & 3 - Bowie & Oddeye (+ Peter)

Quiet guy carrying the world on his shoulders, quiet guy with demons on his past, and a chicken who talks enough for three people. I love them. I also have no idea if I wanted Peter to be this big but it's too late to go back now lol

[notonlymice]

the best girls (my opinion) (movies only)

[brittlebutch]

it's actually so fascinating to me that Brennan has created a character that maintains a pretty relaxed and mild-mannered demeanor and has said multiple times that the absolute Core of her is "FEAR" and how often we see this Fear manifest specifically in Avoidance; it really nails a relationship to that mentality where your brain fully Stops recognizing the emotion properly out of like, sheer self-defense from the stress of having to carry it all the time

I think this is also perfectly showcased in the way we tend to see Tula swing so suddenly from 'level and steady' to 'snarling Panic' and then back again - Just because your brain has detached itself from the Conscious Recognition of the emotion doesn't mean it can Actually stop itself from experiencing it. So the Fear is always there and always acting as a stressor, but because of that inability to Identify it there's no way to recognize or address it before that final straw hits and your bodymind jumps Straight into Full Meltdown Mode; but then once again, once you drop even a Little bit below that Peak Terror your brain ceases to process the emotion; it's like the most exhausting form of Poor Object Permanence in the world

And even if Tula is aware of this happening to her, that doesn't really make it any easier to deal with / address. Even if you're able to spot the symptoms Around the emotion -- chest pain, irritation, nausea, whatever -- because the Emotion Itself is basically impossible to find, you can't really Successfully Pin Down what the problem is OR a way to cope with it. If you can't figure out That You Are Anxious, then figuring out What Is Making You Anxious is impossible, which makes Find A Way To Make Peace With That incomprehensible. That's where the Avoidance comes in: you can no longer identify what might be a Dangerous Situation, which means that Anything New has a big potential to be Really Bad in a variety of ways (ranging "I don't Feel Good" to "Fully Lashing Out bc you've entered Fight/Flight and can't get out of it" to "Actual Outside Danger This Time") and that means the Only Way you know how to be Safe is to just Avoid Doing Anything New and Only stick to Familiar Situations, because anything unfamiliar is a monster of a gamble you don't know how to prepare for or cope with

[eggmeralda]

do you ever feel casually suicidal? like you're not depressed or anything you're doing fine but also it feels like a convenient option

[elizabethrobertajones]

I stan Alphy's character development. Me too, lil buddy.

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else

[icewindandboringhorror]

Recent game related things .. hrmm...

[lemonykleonella]

Thank you For making me feel alive again For making me believe in myself again For making me have passion again For saving me There's no words out there that can describe how I feel without me sounding cheesy and corny, but you have no idea how much you helped me rediscover myself. I wish there were more times when I could see you. Maybe one day.. we could do it all again Thank you so much for that day of January 8th, 2023 @jampreserves @banyanas

[voidscarredadjudicator]

I must inquire how both life and writing are treating you. I crave life update.

Well, I've got good news and bad news. Nothing's canceled, don't worry. It's kinda rambly, so I put it under the keep reading tab, but tl;dr is that more personal life stuff occurred that has dramatically altered the way I go about living for the time being. If you'd like to know more, go ahead.

The good news is that my schedule has recently opened up quite dramatically as of late, which theoretically means I have much more time for writing. The bad news is that the reason for this is that last week I injured my knee bad enough to where I can no longer walk on my own, and therefore no longer work. Very likely a meniscus injury, which is to say the best case scenario is that I need a few weeks of physical therapy to be able to walk again. I've got an MRI scheduled for tomorrow, so I'll know what's going on for sure following that.

On the bright side, I don't live alone, so I've been able to live a relatively comfortable existence despite that - just a lot of adjusting and having to rely on others (which is anathema to me btw bc my dumb ass brain keeps trying to convince me I'm burdening other people despite the fact I literally cannot help myself right now). This was also an injury that happened on the job, so I'm likely covered by Worker's Compensation. From what I understand, it's a pretty common injury among athletes, but an athlete I am not. I've already gone through the low points mental health-wise regarding all this, and these past few days have been spent just taking it easy and doing my best to make this entire situation something I can laugh about.

Sorry that this is just something that I'm dropping out of nowhere, but life does like to just throw shit at you like that - and I in particular can't seem to catch a break. But hey, if I'm feeling up to it here soon, I've got a lot more time on my hands to get back to work on Act 2.

[vvitchering]

I’m like half asleep but I’m thinking about a “bad” god!Gale endgame where a heartbroken Tav is unwilling to just let what they had with Gale go because he’s lost himself. Under the divine veneer, there’s still something of the mortal man left and Tav is going to find a way to bring him back.

Whether he wants to or not.

[love-songs-for-emma]

i was on zillow today, fantasizing about being able to live somewhere, when i came across the listing for my childhood home. it wasn't active/being sold, but it was on there with some pics of the interior. and my GOD. THEY MADE HER UGLY. THEY TOOK HER RUSTIC PUSSY OUT. WHAT THE FUCK

[arielluva]

grief is such a weird emotion bc i can be fine most of the time even if it think about it, but then sometimes thinking about it digs it up all over again

[squidkidcelebi]

Friends, past and present

[ectoplasmer]

world decided to be nice to me and let me dream of bakura and let me interact with him but now i’m yearning So Bad

[dan-crimes]

My sibling is trying to out Link me, you DARE QUESTION THE OG!! THE MASTER !! THE HOLDER OF THE KNOWLEDGE OF LINK !!!!!

[brittlebutch]

i have too many WIPs already but every so often i do think about the first mismag ep where the headmistress casts magic at Jammer to get him to stop talking and Evan questions the legality of that kind of punishment and then the first adult they bring it up with asks if Jammer 'deserved' it instead of literally anything else and can't help the certainty that those moments became kind of Cornerstone to Evan's understanding of the school and how it operates