#it's not that it was bad but i was kinda reading it as a form of study and info and not for entertainment. so it was a slowwww process
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Also I'm unsure if you've been asked this before, but how would Geno and colors interactions be like? I randomly thought of them today so
I haven’t fully finished reading Aftertale, so I can’t give detailed dynamics at this moment (someone who knows Geno and his character well can potentially step in?), but I do know that Color’s character and design was inspired by a mix between Seraphim!Sans and Geno.
It’s to my understanding that other than the wound across their chests and something being up with one of their eye sockets, they were also both separated from their loved ones and kept trapped somewhere and potentially replaced by another.
Color was thrown into the Void alongside Gaster. His existence was completely forgotten and almost completely overwritten, with Undyne taking his place and role. Geno was in the SAVE screen, and was eventually joined by his timeline’s Frisk.
I’m uncertain if people forgot about him, but given the existence of another Sans, im assuming so—or at least, they didn’t realize their Sans was any different from Geno. I need to re read the comics at some point.
It’s to my understanding that Geno has/had plans to destroy his timeline/universe, wanting to end Papyrus’ suffering? I find that interesting when it comes to Color, mostly because Core Frisk confronted him once, about worries he’d turn out in a bad way.
I don’t remember the exact words they said to him at the moment, but given their knowledge of the Multiverse and the like, I wouldn’t be surprised if they were expressing concerns that Color would start thinking similarly to Geno.
Either wanting to end the timeline/universe to end suffering, or more character specific to Color’s situation, either for means such as revenge or what Color perceived as justice.
When Color confronts Undyne in the first part of Othertale and punches her, not only was the punch completely unnecessary, not only was the scaring her beforehand unwarranted, but we also see her both creeping up on her from behind and glaring at her too. His flames and eyes are yellow, implying he was filled with or influenced by Justice in that moment.
Another thing that’s different between Geno and Color, from what I see mentioned on the wiki at least (which im aware could be incorrect), is that Geno can control memories—can remove and restore them, which Color cannot, despite how much he definitely—desperately—would want to.
Color is forgotten, despite everything. And he cannot change that. Despite how angry and devastated it makes him, how much it hurts him.
Color also does not have Determination, he cannot control the Resets, although he has a close thing in the form of Perseverance.
That’s all I can really think of at the moment until I find out more about Aftertale and Geno. I’ve also seen Geno and Color’s duo being called sliceings (slice + siblings) before, which i thought was kinda funny.
#howlsasks#colorcxoded#slicelings#utmv#sans au#sans aus#perseverance soul#justice soul#fallen children#fallen humans#othertale six human souls#six human souls#othertale firelights#color sans#colour sans#color!sans#othertale sans#othertale#ivory!undyne#ivory undyne#othertale undyne#fishbones siblings#void colleagues#shade!gaster#shade gaster#othertale gaster#geno sans#geno!sans#aftertale#aftertale sans
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everything you pray for
rating: t pairing: carlos and marjan friendship word count: 3.8k
“I don’t know. It kinda threw me, I guess? I told myself I was ready, no matter what they said, but I didn’t think it’d feel like this.” “I get that,” Carlos says. His voice is gentle. Marjan looks back at him and finds something warm in his eyes. “A part of you was just expecting it to go well.” “Yeah.” She swallows against the lump that’s starting to form in her throat. “That’s kinda how I felt, when I came out,” Carlos goes on to say. “My parents hugged me and told me that they loved me, but… The next morning, everything was different.” “Bad different?” Carlos shrugs. “Not…technically. But it felt like it.” or, marjan texts carlos after the dinner with her parents
read on ao3
#one thing about me is i will continue writing marjan carlos codas while trying not to think about how close to home they hit#911 lone star#carlos reyes#marjan marwani#my fic
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I am EXCITED
Season 5 Episode 4 - The End
○ CAS'S STANCE lmao
They're talking about the Colt. Cas heard that the demons still have it
(I have no idea what happened to it, I'll have to go back and read who had it last) (okay, just looked, last I could see was s3 when Bela sold it, I'm guessing I'm missing a situation in between there?)
CAS STANDING On the side of the road for presumably 4+ hours lmao
○ Sam calling Dean to tell him about that Lucifer update. They prob haven't talked since they split
"I want back in for starters"
Sam wants to track Lucifer down and kill him
Dean's skeptical about Sam + revenge
There's still so much pain there. Dean telling Sam they need to stay away from eachother. They're better off apart. Both sides would try to use the other to get to them
"Bye, Sam"
○ Dean woke up in a post-apocalyptal world
It's 2014, 5 years in the future from our Dean's timeline
A Croatoan virus infested one
○ Zachariah just pops into the Impala, nonchalantly, reading a newspaper
Ha Zachariah had to place people around to give him Dean's location bc of his ribs (specifically a bible preaching guy on the street)
He says he's keeping Dean here for 3 days
○ Ha Dean meeting Dean
○ Dean canonically likes wearing pink satin panties. Now that's something
Why would Dean ask other Dean to say something only he would know when most of the time, the things looking like other people can see their memories?
○ No Bobby. No Sam.
Endverse Dean hasn't talked to Sam since what happened in our Dean's this morning
○ I've never seen anyone else say it, so is it just me who finds Chuck kinda...
Like, he's pretty cute?
○ So is Chuck asking stupid questions about supplies and stuff bc Zachariah formed this world, so he made Chuck the way he perceives him?
This only works if this isn't actually a real future timeline
Otherwise that's just Chuck being extra dick-ish
Like bro, do something.
Just casually asks about supplies he damn knows well what to do about.
(this'll only make sense if you know what happens in S11)
○ Okay, a few notes
1. Cas winking at Dean is beautiful
2. I've never wanted to be in an apocalyptic world so bad
3. Cas immediately being able to tell Dean isn't from his timeline is so special to me
4. The hair and the slightly longer stubble have me weak in all kinds of places
No, you
○ Dean's pissed at Dean
○ Woah 2014 Dean just aquired the Colt
"Tonight, I'm gonna kill the Devil"
○ Cas laughing at 2009 Dean being a little shit to 2014 Dean is also special to me
And again
"What? I like past you"
○ Cas pointing out all the issues with Dean's deadly plan, but says "of course" instantly when Dean asks if he's coming 🩷🩷🩷
Cas is just going along with everything grumpy old 2014 Dean says. I need him.
I wonder if Cas knew about our Dean right away bc he had an ounce of personality or hope or something
○ Sam said yes, so Lucifer is wearing him
2014 Dean is going to kill him
He's telling 09 Dean that when he gets back, he needs to say yes to Michael, so none of this happens. Begging, actually
I'll probably be wondering later, so: Being Michael's vessel aids in the apocalypse bc Michael vs Lucifer would be a huge battle that would cause a lot of damage.
"Half the planet is better than no planet"
○ Cas being absolutely hopeless is so hot
The drugs. The orgies. The guru stuff.
○ 2014 Dean sending people unknowingly into a trap as a decoy.
'14 Dean ended up being killed by Samifer anyways
Kinda digging it
He's missing the Lucifer charm, tho
Not that I like Luci, but idk how else to describe his snarky, happy, deviance
Samifer is great separate from the other Lucifer versions, tho. Hot.
Always loved Jared's eye shape and brow bone.
○ Zachariah is doing a lot to prove his point. Is that a real future, or something Zachariah concocted? Can he even do that?
○ Cas pulling Dean away from Zachariah
"That's pretty nice timing, Cas"
"We had an appointment" adorable.
He missed his Cas
○ Yay he's calling Sam.
Endverse!Dean tried everything, and couldn't stop what was happening, so his solution was to get this Dean to say yes. Even he knew '09 Dean would never.
'09 Dean is doing what the other never did - get Sam back in. That'll be the difference.
#supernatural#spn#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel#spn first watch#spn rewatch#spn s05e14#The End#spn The End
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Do you have any headcanons or thoughts about Falin having a crush on Marcille pre-canon? Especially during her later years at the school/the years she was with Laios.
Just full on "awkward and slightly gnc teenage lesbian has a massive crush on the touchy-feely girly girl straight best friend" tropes everywhere. Even better bc it's the "best friend is also the popular girl while lesbian is the slightly ostracized quiet one" dynamic in school. Falin gets so so so good at not having a heart attack every time Marcille gets in her personal space. But she's so resigned to never saying anything bc why would a girl as blinding as Marcille ever like her back. She also doesn't make an effort to get over it either, she's just content to be trapped in that stable dynamic of silently being in love with Marcille while getting to enjoy CLEARLY being Marcille's favourite person. She gets so used to it that it's almost just background noise most of the time-- it would have to be, unless she wanted to be freaking out 24/7 bc Marcille is so goddamn affectionate.
Her feelings also definitely change throughout the time that they're in school together-- at first it was this "whooaaah pretty older girl" puppy crush that you can clearly see developing in the flashbacks we get (I think she doesn't even like... realize her fixation on Marcille is romantic at all until years after it starts, when she's 12-14 ish and all the other girls around her are talking about crushes). But then they get closer, over the years Marcille starts getting really attached and letting down her guard, and Falin gets to see the ridiculous side of her. She gets to calm her down from her tantrums when experiments don't work out, or help her clean up when something explodes in her face. I feel like the progression of her feelings from "schoolgirl infatuation" to "unrequited love" probably almost exactly corresponds to how slowly Marcille goes from trying to keep Falin at a polite but friendly distance (like she does with everyone else) to her facade completely eroding as she becomes her cheerful and ridiculous self again for the first time since her father died.
That's probably the saddest part: Falin knows that she's clearly Marcille's favourite person on the surface level, but she doesn't quite fully grasp the enormity of what that means to Marcille. She doesn't get that she's the person who made the world colorful again for Marcille, that she is the first person outside of Marcille's family to really and truly make her laugh. She just thinks she's the beloved but dinky little short-lived sidekick, one of many that Marcille has had and will have.
Part of it is that, despite Marcille becoming such a clingy and affectionate best friend, I think her initial demeanour already did its damage. You see Falin being super adventurous and weird at first, bringing Marcille berries and other stuff, only to be rebuffed by Marcille exasperatedly saying she's working or looking kind of put off by it. And by the time you see her a little older, shes already quieter and better at masking -- and I'm not saying that that's entirely Marcille's fault (being the weird girl at an all girls academy for almost the entirety of her teenhood must have been brutal, my god) but she definitely learned that she's a potential nuisance to Marcille if she doesn't tone herself down. She learned that Marcille most likely sees her as a weird little kid following her around bc she has no other friends. And for the most part, she was never given any reason to unlearn any of that.
And that all very very smoothly transitions into Marcille being her "first love that was never meant to be anyway" when she leaves the academy. Chapter closed in her mind: she loved and pined from a distance and that was that. Every now and then she'll see another woman with Marcille's build or her shade of hair and be like ":( I miss her..." But then just kinda move on with her day. Same with when she's going through her own spellbook and finds a note that Marcille left her/correction that she made-- she'll smile fondly and reminisce about how much Marcille doted on her, and then move on.
Sometimes she thinks about contacting Marcille but convinces herself that it's too late (she spent too many months focusing on getting Laios healthy again and didn't mean to go no contact, but ah well). It's only when she has a practical reason to be reaching out that would also benefit Marcille ("Marcille is studying dungeons and we need a trustworthy mage to go with us to the dungeons") that she feels like she's allowed/that it wouldn't just be 100% a nuisance.
I almost think she didn't expect Marcille to reply at all, only to get a telegraph (or some in-universe equivalent of express mail, maybe magical pigeon carrier) that's like. EN ROUTE TO ISLAND. LETTER TO FOLLOW. and she freaks out like AAAA LAIOS SHE SAID YES WE HAVE TO CLEAN UP NOW.
I do think getting a response accidentally sparks a little hope in her, judging by the way she acts in the chp 57 flashback-- she's pouty that Marcille sees her as a kid, gets really worked up about being presentable, and then tries to play it cool when she actually meets Marcille (as if she didn't freak out and force Laios to shave while rambling a mile a minute about Marcille). She's an adult now, really and truly, and she's seen and survived things that her 18 yr old self would have never even imagined-- then all of a sudden, the person she was in love with since she was ten years old appears, and she's so desperate to be seen as mature and competent. She's trying soooo hard to impress Marcille with her newfound combat and dungeoneering experience...
Only to fall right back into their old dynamic. RIP. At least she gets the girl eventually, even if it takes dying twice and being the core catalyst behind an almost-apocalypse.
#asks#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#dungeon meshi#farcille#marcilleposting#kinda#the irony is that for me she DOES succeed in impressing marcille#its just that its so gradual and marcille is so so good at repression that neither of them notice it#marcille just sees her reacting so confidently to dire combat situations#easily throwing up protective spells even when they get ambushed#and seeing her become an expert in her field of magic that marcille would even consider an intellectual peer or equal#as well as a competent healer and combatant who also grew up a lot to take care of laios herself#changes marcilles feelings surprisingly fast i think. i think shes down bad in love with falin for the majority of the year before canon#the absence made the heart grow fonder but the feelings more mutable and its almost like meeting a new person when they reunite#anyway. you guys have to stop reading my mind and asking about major themes from my wips#yes the next chapter of a little creature touches on this a lot.#stop making me give away my takes before i can properly write them into fiction form fjsjjdf
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Thinking about how much I'd love to see a Digimon season where the main digimon can turn into humans... give me my reverse Frontier
#I loved all the human versions of digimon we got in Ghost Game#I want that to be the main gimmick of a season so bad#also obsessed with the human designs from the Xros Wars manga#which I haven't read yet but I WILL eventually#once I'm done with V-Tamer which I've been procrastinating#it's actually kinda surprising they haven't done that yet#having the digimon have human forms so they can blend in with the human world just makes sense#it takes away the hassle of having to hide them#they could go to school with their partners!!#it'd be so much funnn#aaa..#Digimon ramblings#I should go to sleep
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just read the new mutants issue where Charles chose to stay behind in space and my god the juxtaposition between Charles trusting Erik and Erik joining the hellfire club and wondering at his own trust worthiness. I wonder how much of Charles decision was him ultimately trying to avoid the fact that his first class had seemingly betrayed mutant kind and not be willing to face them and how much of it was Dani and Illyana's reaction to him having Karma mind control Illyana. the fact that Illyana was depending on him to ease her mind through limbo and in choosing to stay he forced karma to do it instead, probably fucking up their relationship in the process.
I love him, this is crazy, how much of this is him trying to runaway and how much is this him not trusting himself to fix things and how much is it just him trusting Erik?
i keep trying to put into words my exact thoughts about the sitch but there really is a lot for one issue aintit... oh charles you and your brain...
#snap chats#thats why we have tag rambles AHAHA#ok so to tackle things one at a time charles ultimately deciding to stay in space despite his expressed want to return to earth#obviously it was when lilandra pointed out if her sister took charge of the shi'ar then the universe- earth included- would be in peril#charles notes his position as a losing one: whichever choice he makes he loses#he goes to earth then the universe could be at stake/he stays in space he loses his kids#of course charles COULD just put his faith in the starjammers but is that a risk he wants to take ? evidently not#charles' reoccurring flaw is he's willing to sacrifice personal relationships for the greater perceived good#even lilandra acknowledges this- that charles' homesickness for earth was an inevitability just as she is indebted to protecting the stars#so now his ruptured relationship with illyana and co- esp right after comforting a split illyana last issue#we've seen charles act more coldly/rashly when he's about to lose people (i think of his first death with the og5 mostly)#i mean it's a key part to charles' chara that he doesn't favor mind controlling others and im sure he has the same regard for his students#he's aware of the damage it can do and in this instance- for one reason or another- he orders it to be done regardless#im sure he does this as a form of defense: if his kids are upset with him they won't feel too bad about losing him and it'll be less painfu#obviously we still see sam wish charles farewell and wish for him to come back soon but yk.. worthy attempt..#and it's not as if charles wants them to hate him ENTIRELY.. he's still touched by sam's goodbye no.... fickle man he is..#i dont think charles is totally afraid to confront the og5- its what made him want to return to earth with the nms initially#tho again.. could his decision to stay in the stars be influenced by that? that maybe he ISNT prepared to confront them like he thought?#who's to say... not me i dont got that psych degree yet..#erik being charles' trusted confidant definitely made his decision easier on top of that: i mean is he needed if he has a substitute#i think charles DOES wholly trust erik: charles really doesnt approach his x-men half heartedly. from his pov ofc#if he didn't genuinely believe in erik's potential he wouldn't have picked him; hes a comforting thought when charles decides to depart#'although i'm gone erik understands me and my goals enough to continue my work as good as i would have so i have nothing to worry about'#which. yk. makes the whole White King thing kinda awkward VJAELVJEAKL charles you fool#i have no idea how this saga ends though... tbh im only on ish 45 of NM i just read 50 and 51 to get context for this ask#so i can only wait and see how this saga turns out... once i finish reading house of m/secret invasion stuff jvLKEJKA#idk im tired and rambling dont pay attention to me.. ramblin bout charles' brain is a good day for me regardless if i make sense jVLAJ
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Probably one of my fave things about CPC is the fact that Gwen genuinely isn’t conventionally attractive, she’s not just some girl who *gasp* wears glasses and has her hair in a ponytail or something X_X The amount of ”””ugly””” characters I’ve that seen that fall into that trope bruhhh. But as the comic goes on, like Frederick, you get used to her appearance and come to appreciate her as truly beautiful bc of who she is <3
#cursed princess club#rambling#ig shes like fiona from shrek in that way??#who in the end stays as an ogre despite her princess form#and shrek loves her like that yknow#oh no another shrek reference#aerial was so real for that fic ngl#honestly i could compare cpc to true beauty as well or something#bc that comic also deals with ugliness kinda#but its different shit yknow#its more focused on love triangles XD#heck even lookism addresses it a bit#but that comic is kinda traumatic for me to read at times bc of the fatphobia and such lol#so id say it deals moreso with body image compared to cpc#which is more about the impact of words rather than the appearance itself#the literary compared to the physical#lookism is so fucking brutal fr#like you think frederick's bullying was bad???#lookism mc would be jealous of him#uhhh ive gone on a whole rant i apologise
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after drawing cold, i started thinking about how much they resemble eyeless jack, but the canonical version.

was this on purpose?? 😭
it wasn't lmao, eyeless jack, laughing jack, ticky toby and the like god i hope im getting those names right were a bit after my time in terms of creepypasta. by the time they were popular i was more so on r/nosleep. i don't know a whole lot about the """new age""" spooky spaghetti admittedly
#slenderman. the rake. smile dog. lavender town.#im more familiar with early 2000s creepypasta#there are exceptions to this obviously#a lot of them are edgy early 2000s-2010s horror or are like. the proto form of mascot horror in that the spookster in question-#is conventionally attractive person that Has Something Wrong With Them#and no shade to that at all because i know what I'M writing but at the time a lot of those stories were kinda dogshit#a la jeff the killer#you ever read the og jeff the killer story? its bad! it suck ass! the image is doing the heavy lifting#anyway that was my TED talk#what the fuck do i even tag this as.
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knowing that tiktok will be back under trump, esp after seeing that stupid little message on the shutdown page, is so exhausting. the braindead ppl on that app will literally eat it up so much, this is going to be such an exhausting era of misinformation even MORE than it's been and you can see it coming from a mile away
#i also think censorship concerns aside it might be good to force ppl off thst shit for a minute#like some of the reactions ive seen are insane#what do u mean u couldnt come up w smth to do in ur free time if u didnt have ur brain killer app help#read a book watch a movie take away read the actual news like literally anything else#its kinda miserable like obv the govt banning apps is not ideal here but i can hardly be#rah rah bring it back in its exact form bc its just not even healthy for the human brain fhskfbjsdjd#i mean none of these prob are but that one especially LOL#but itll be back its not that serious#also dont get me wrong from a progressive organizing standpoint i get why its important but like#the other side is also doing it on there lol and its bad#and most irls i see arent into it at all theyre mad they cant brainlessly scroll their jokes lmfao
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Some angst thoughts with you/Yuu after Jamil's overblot (with an extra dash of snake phobia because, uhh, personal experience):
Jamil thinks he knows why you avoid meeting his eyes - he doesn't realize you're still working on getting used to his presence in general, trying to keep at bay those memories of his overblot that seem so deeply ingrained in your mind.
In the right situation, just hearing Jamil's voice seems to take you back.
Seeing him from the corner of your eye isn't much better: those braids really look an awful lot like something long and slithery when your mind's primed for it, your mind anticipating the hissing snakes darting towards your face again.
You find it difficult to sleep with your bedroom door closed - it makes you feel too confined, with no way out.
Not that the new nightmares help your sleeping situation much, either.
Kalim keeps on inviting you over to the dorm for yet another get together. You know it would do you good to go, eventually, but you're not sure you're ready yet. So you come up with another excuse.
#twisted wonderland#jamil viper#kalim al-asim#ner writes#basically I would have a very bad time dealing with Jamil's overblot form because sneks#so I'm kinda just extrapolating from there and thinking how I'd do in Yuu's shoes#and alright canon Yuu did not spend that much time actually interacting with him iirc but anyway#not sure how much sense these make but like kidnapping mindcontrol and snakes?#yeah I would be shook for sure#ngl now I kinda really wanna read a nice fic of reader/Yuu and Jamil slowly building a connection after his overblot#sure the other overblots were traumatic too but the captivity just makes scarabia extra fun
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2024 reads / storygraph
Lord of the Empty Isles
sci-fi/fantasy
set on a supposedly utopian planet recovering from a climate crisis, where bonds between people are able to be seen and manipulated (by some people)
follows a young man whose brother was cursed and killed by an infamous outlaw 5 years ago, and he’s finally able to curse him back - but it rebounds, as he’s somehow fatebound to the outlaw
to find a cure and save them both they have to team up, and he quickly finds out that the resources the outlaw is stealing go to the thousands of people neglected on prison planets, and he has to go against what he thought was right to help them
no romance, aroace MC, focus on platonic relationships
arc from netgalley, out june 6
#Lord of the Empty Isles#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#I enjoyed this quite a bit! But I think it could have gone a bit further in places.#It has some interesting concepts and a great cast of characters and yay no romance#I do have a lot of thoughts and little critiques...#it's p obvious where the plot is going and what's going to happen#There’s clearly a lot gone into developing this bond system but to be honest I still don’t entirely get it?#It seems to emphasise that the bonds just reflect connections between people rather than predetermine anything; but also the plot kind of#hinges on Remy and Idrian having a predetermined bond? There are a lot of explanations of intricacies but a lot of it didn’t sink in idk#It’s promoted as QP but to me it reads as a general platonic relationship. I generally expect a depiction of a QPR to have like..#some form of acknowledgement/depiction of the form of their relationship being a particular (undefinable?) kind#with some specific level of commitment? I’m being picky maybe they mean queerplatonic themes/vibes rather than saying it’s a qpr#specifically. the centred platonic relationship is good! it doesn't seem like a qpr to me; at most what could one day be that#also things are solved quite quickly and easily in the end - both the curse and the downfall of the bad guy.#I feared it would go down the route of blaming things on the person in charge rather than emphasising systemic issues which it kinda does….#It’s impossible to ignore right now just how deeply people are willing to believe dehumanising propaganda - and how 'telling the truth'#and exposing the person in power as bad doesn’t actually do anything so that happening here made me go…… oh okay. well.#there is room for a sequel that maybe will explore this tho. idk#complaints aside - I do recommend this! It was fun and pretty unique.#aroace books#no romance
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Dan: local man who clearly loves his partner claims love isn't real Phil: local man pretends he didn't just imply he loves his partner by including his friends awkwardly to sound nonchalant about it, making it sound much weirder than it had to be
#yep they've nailed it alright#dnp#phan#read love platonically or romantically but like#just saying you don't buy a house with a person you don't LOVE in some way shape or form#anyway Dan's energy was all kinds of off this video I felt bad he looks tired and kinda done#idk if it was just gamingmas but probs not hope he's doing alright!#and I'm not even talking about the existential speeches cause same lol#the video was really fun as usual I'm not complaining just like hope they take a longer break if they need it we'll complain but be fine
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....idk in a fandom this gigantic how are people already coalescing onto a handful of popular headcanons and scenarios that just become the baseline now, when the source material gives us literally limitless possibilities to work with
#the torrential flood of 'jayvik with 4 kids' content im getting on arcane twt is incredible rn#but i do feel like im sitting in a bit of a corner bc i feel like the only person at this point who doesn't hc viktor as trans sobs#there's obv absolutely nothing i have against it it's just become a surprisingly pervasive fanon view that it's actually difficult to avoid#i think at least half of fics in the jayvik tag are trans viktor lmao#not to say i don't read any that are. but it's just not really what im interested in#i fear it will become one of those fanon hcs that will just be accepted as fact and if you happen to not ascribe to it you'll be ostracized#i've even started to see 'don't mpreg this you better be talking about trans pregnancy' like hi. sorry but are you new here#half my interest in the ship esp postcanon stuff is the weird magic and monsterfuckeryness of it all#like how can you not explore interesting other ways of giving them kids. he's connected to the arcane. he might still be in herald form#who the fuck knows. if i see pregnant viktor i would honestly prefer it to be Weird and semi-nonhuman thats the cool shit#i just. idk. srs please im not trying to say anything bad about the trans viktor headcanon it's fine and im glad ppl see themselves in him#it's just. it is becoming rather inescapable. the 'castiel loves bees' effect yknow.#i really want to interact with this fandom and im trying to like. reply to people on twitter. and even more now it feels like#if my headcanons don't align to the popular fandom big names' then it's pointless. i have no 1-on-1 communication with anyone#in this fandom it feels very lonely. i watch everyone make great art and jabber on and i kinda just watch and wave from the corner#anyway i'll just keep imagining my weird arcane herald mpreg or w/e. it's fun. prob will never write it tho cause the fandom clearly#knows what it wants and that isn't it lol. i barely see any arcane herald fics which is WILD. like canon gave you a feast and you're#ignoring it in favor of just having viktor be human in everything. lowkey hydrogen bomb vs crying baby lmao#i can think of three postcanon fics that have arcane herald viktor and i hold onto them so tightly lol#but yeah. this goes for more than just trans viktor it's about 'all timelines all possibilities' in terms of what people write in fics#it's for the most part very...tame? in terms of creativity of concept? there's darkfic of course but.#not nearly enough in the way of Weird that i'd expect given what's actually offered in the source material#'go write it yourself' well im trying it's taking forever and also the fandom's made me hesitant to write anything weird bc it seems like#there isn't interest in it. like bro even the number of fics featuring mage viktor is insanely low#the number of viktor permutations we have to work with and the fandom opts for the easy ones almost every time. sad
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Went to the beach, took a cold swim, dried in the sun while reading Crime and Punishment and drinking iced coffee. Walked back home. Ordered a copy of Eroticism by Georges Bataille. Checked my bank account and realised I have enough money to spoil myself with a new perfume. Made plans with friends. Felt better.
#i know eroticism is free to read online but i prefer to have things in book form when i know i want to read the entire thing#morning swims are making me feel so much better btw !#i think being in nature helps me have a wider perspective on things#its sort of the opposite of my body? if that makes sense#everything happening inside of me is so terrifying but outside of myself everything keeps living and thriving and thats kinda nice#when im at my lowest the world feels suffocating but being out on the water surrounded by greenery and peace makes everything big again :)#i still feel very bad and wrong. but im doing my best to find moments of joy and peace#for once in my life i am absolutely certain that whatever is wrong with me is not my fault#and that conviction makes it easier to take good care of myself in the best way i know how
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gin, we need your critical opinion about megalopolis. was it really that bad?
i mean.
is it unwatchable? no. but also it is not good for sure. would love for it to be a case of "so bad it circles back being somehow good", but unfortunately no, becasue in order to achieve such a thing coppola should have gone camp and embraced the style instead of taking himself too seriously.
there are. ideas. that considered by themselves sort of make sense if you are desperate to find sense in this insanity of a movie, but whether within or without context for the large part they remain disjointed. and are anyway very cringe at core. i don't know how to put it kindly but the script just sucks. and choices were made.
#continuing in the tags because i'm embarassed lol i am no expert at all and just like watching movies#before and after watching it myself i read and listened to opinions coming from both sides as one does and#listen the movie ain't that deep#what moves some people to call it a masterpiece is essentially the same that moves other call it a disappointment: - this constant quoting#(both in the dialogues and in the visuals) something else something cool#without paying the due attention as to whether each quote is coherent to the context in which it is being used or adds any value to the#general narration#- but also this. delirious. thing with lights and cgi (it should have been practical effects!!) and. editing. that wants to be something bu#it's genuinely just outdated‚ ridicolous‚ i found it kinda offending even lol#i appreciate a genuine homage to the arts as the next guy but citations aren't enough#this movie created some talk about the duality of cinema as a form of art and entertainment which isn't entirely out pf place but if you#watch megalopolis you will easily see the entertainment aspect isn't there because the movie sucks‚ and that the art aspect is shallow#anyway i forgot all the million things i wanted to add so very quickly:#director: gave himself five stars on letterboxd. bad#writing: bad#editing: bad#photography: okayish#music: don't even remember it#acting: there's only so much an actor can do when their characters are unflattering#set & costume design: i don't understand why the future utopia looks like 10s fast fashion clodius and wow are the only ones who get it. ba#sorry for the nonsense hope my answer is at least more enjoyable than watching megalopolis ha-ha (':#gin answer
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baru cormorant seems to me to be a series that suffers miserably for me having read machineries of empire first. unfortunately everything BC is doing strikes me as something MoE did better and more believably and with much a greater and more grounded eye for how systems, complex system interaction, and oppression like. work
#red rambles#also i don't like the writing very much so I'm not having as much fun with it as i did with MoE#but YHL straight up writes with the exact approach and methodology *i* write - the narrative frame is extremely close. the lines are punchy#the description is sparse the info we are delivered is typically in short wacky one-off chunks that tell us not only something about the#world but something about the narrator who is also the main character whose head we're in#the timing. so on and so forth#someone told me that seth dickinson is transfem but i cant find her (?) pronouns anywhere so if anyone knows where to see them i'd#appreciate a link if only to complain that i don't like her (?) writing that much in comparison because it is a lot less.... rewardingly#entertaining i suppose. when compared to the way yoon ha lee structures his. there are much fewer twists#and of course the major huge twist of Baru Cormorant was hidden from the reader which i just think is *bad form* when it comes to intrigue!#when yhl will lay all the moving pieces of the plot before you openly and say 'hey. isn't that a funny side tangent. anyway look to your#left; something is exploding' and then as it keeps unfolding he goes 'and here in small scale is how it is being used! isn't that#interesting to see how these pieces move? now look to your right; something is exploding' and then at the very end it all comes perfectly#together#the way i felt around the middle/end of Raven Strategem when i understood the spy network the first time is something that BC cannot do#you aren't trusted with the pieces and you don't get to play the game of understanding that you weren't *told* literally everything#i'm reading monster baru cormorant today as i go about my errands and I kinda don't think it's what i want because i want it to be the kind#of working awful poisoned bloodstained empire as the hexarchate and i want it to be a complex contradictory overlapping system like the#hexarchate's army and i want the banal cruelty of perfectly decent people condemning strangers to awful awful bloody deaths because they're#'not like us' instead of the petrified horror *everyone* has of the Social Contagion Agents because i just do not BUY the construction of#dickinson's Social Hygiene Offices and their place in the world#but i cant just read the MoE books any more. i'll get bored. i'm already kind of bored of reading them over and over
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