#it's not a one-and-done type of convo situation

[riaki]

i literally cant stop thinkin’ about highschoolbully!gojo who used to be your ride or die ‘til he started getting attention from those popular jock type guys who are always assholes to everyone. and him being.. well, him means he preens under attention no matter who it’s from, so naturally he started to gravitate towards that group and their little troop of cheerleading fangirls. and then he started distancing from you and without either of you really realizing it, you’ve slipped between the other’s fingers. but the way he acts towards you makes you think he let you fall without moving a muscle to slow you down.

soon enough, a year swings by and by the end of it he’s gone from your life, save as just another face in the gaggle of boys who make crude jokes and laugh at smart kids and pop milk cartoons during lunch just for the hell of it. but you’re minding your own business, ‘cause you’re mature enough to realize that people come and go, no matter how close you might’ve been and you think it’s unfortunate that so many memories could be thrown aside in a blink of an eye, but it makes a lot of sense when you walk past satoru and his friends bullying some random kid. you don’t know him, but you’ve heard enough to realize it’s his girlfriend satoru’s flirting with while his ‘gang’ kick at the kid. and it’s sickening, but you don’t say anything when you walk by.

and when you don’t ever see the kid afterward and catch the dark eyebags under his girlfriend’s eyes, you come to the cruel realization that satoru isn’t the boy who’d bandage the scrape on your knee you got from tripping in the playground or buy you a soda because he’s noticed your sweat when you were walking home and you don’t have any money left on you.

it’s a glass half empty, half full type of situation. on the one hand, you don’t have him anymore. on the other hand, you don’t have him anymore. that is, you lost your best friend, but you’ve also lost someone who has the potential to absolutely ruin your life. and you don’t know whether to be glad or not, so you just mind your own business even if it hurts a little when he ignores you, stops tossing paper at your head in class (unless it’s to embarrass you) and stops walking you to and from school.

but the cherry on top of the shit cake is that he doesn't get it. so when he approaches you in the library one day after satiating the need to tear pages from books and make them into paper airplanes to throw at people, he doesn't seem to understand why you try to ignore him, or put off his attempts to hold a convo. but the worst part is that he's just sleazy and clueless about it. it's like he took an eraser and wiped every single year of your friendship off the chalkboard with one fell swipe, and you wish he'd done that too to the less-than-appropriate messages he and his friends had written towards one of your classmates.

he doesn't understand why you're hesitant to talk, and that's what makes it the worst. he always thinks he's in the right, and he keeps setting you off and it sucks that he knows exactly what sets you off. "i'm an asshole? what're you talking about? really, you're in over your head. you never change." he laughs, and you ignore him, and he gets bored, and he's about to leave when he spots your wallet open next to your book, on the table. there's a polaroid peeking out, and he recognizes the tufts of white hair to be him. but there's a weird feeling in his chest, and he thinks he gets it from you, so he leaves because he thinks you're weird.

and it goes on; you practically become a nobody in satoru's eyes, because of that weird, weird feeling you give him. it's unfamiliar and he's never gotten it before and he doesn't like it. but it's unavoidable when your professor pairs you two for the end-of-term project. and of course, you're ready to do all the work, because that's how it always was between you when you were kids. but sometimes he'd surprise you by helping, and he'd show you that he was actually intelligent just to earn your praise because he liked it. but he ignored you, and you did everything, and it would've been okay if not for his friends egging him on to present your entire project when the day came and leave you with no content for a grade.

that's the first time it hits him: does he really want to do that? but it's not like it'll be the first time; you've always taken the hits for him, because you're naturally smart and you'll pick yourself back up in no time, and you get why he does it, so it'll be okay. so he agrees, and he enjoys the time he gets to spend with you through it, but the nagging weird feeling that blooms in his chest like a pesky weed only grows stronger. that's all his feelings ever seem to do around you.

but before you know it, presentation day swings around. you had coffee this morning (on his card), and you're ready enough to shoot him a small smile that sends his heart a-flutter. so you go up, feeling up to the task and ready until— he starts talking, and talking, and talking, and people don't think that he's taking your words out of your mouth because he's intelligent when he wants to make you praise him and you don't get the chance to get a word in and you notice the guys are laughing and hitting each other's shoulders to themselves in the upper rows and before you know it it's over. people are clapping but moreso they're looking at you and they're whispering— but it's terribly loud and they don't bother to hide it. they call you things that shouldn't bother you but they do anyway, because it's satoru's fault, and you're such a fool for thinking you could have it your way again.

so you leave class early, excusing yourself and ignoring the way your professor gives you a distasteful look and scribbles something next to your name. you're out the door in a second, neglecting your bags and satoru's a little lost because— didn't he just do good? people were clapping, and laughing with him and not at him, but it's attention either way so he doesn't mind. so why do you? why did you look at him like he stabbed you in the back? and his friends are calling his name, and he wishes he could chase after you and do something but he doesn't.

and it's a little sickening what they do next; one of their girls grabbed your bags and tossed it to them, and they've started rifling through it as if they own it, tearing up your shit and dumping everything onto the ground and he's kind of just... glued to the chair by his feelings. his heart feels like it's been patched together and the weird fuzzy feeling he had in his chest that's been cultivating has extinguished to be replaced with something he realizes he's only ever felt when it comes to you— guilt.

he's so lost in his thoughts that he doesn't realize his friend is silently offering him something— nudging his side to get his attention. he takes it without really realizing he moved his hand, and his silent friend with the gauges in his ears and the dark hair gets up and leaves without another word. when satoru looks down, he realizes he's been given your wallet. "the reward for betraying your baby," they call it. like all you're worth is the money in your account.

he's a little curious. that's how he's always been; asking you questions, rummaging through your stuff, laughing sheepishly and shaking it off when you caught him red-handed. so he opens it up, ignoring your sad little cards and the funny look on your license. he's looking for something, subconsciously; but he doesn't find it. there's no white tuft of hair to suggest his presence in your life; just empty black leather. nothing else.

and he doesn't see you after. or the following day. or the following weeks; weeks that turn into months that turn into the end of school and he's graduating but you're not by his side. and neither are his so called 'friends'; the only thing he has to their name is your own ruined friendship. it's a shame; he feels alone. very alone. no fuzzy weird feeling, not even that thing people call guilt. no attention to chase, and connections are ever harder to make. it shouldn'tve mattered that much, right? it was just a presentation. why wouldn't you just come back to him like you always did? were you not still friends...?

but the blood is still on his hands, and he doesn't manage to ever wash it off. guilt has a way of festering; of weighing on the heart 'till there's nothing left to feel or think but unfortunate circumstance and what could've been done differently. it just sucks that he never tried hard enough to keep you from slipping between his grasp. and now, he doesn't even have a polaroid to your friendship's name.

pt.2

[majikkulu]

˚₊· .͟͟͞͞➳❥ PILE ONE i’m  getting  the  vibe  that  you’ll  meet  your  future  spouse  during  a  time  when  you’re  really  feeling  yourself.  like,  you’re  glowing  from  the  inside  out.  you're  doing  what  you  love,  you’re  tapped  into  your  passions,  and  your  energy  is  magnetic  without  even  trying.  people  are  noticing,  and  so  are  they.  this  person  might  come  into  your  life  when  you’re  not  even  looking  for  anything  serious.  just  vibing,  hanging  out,  focusing  on  yourself.  maybe  you’re  out  with  friends  or  throwing  yourself  into  something  you  love.  it  feels  like  you're  in  a  strong  place  emotionally,  really  centered  and  grounded  in  who  you  are.  even  though  you’re  shining,  you  might  still  be  going  through  it  a  little  behind  the  scenes.  maybe  you’ve  taken  on  too  much  or  you’re  dealing  with  burnout  or  just  general  life  stress.  your  plate  could  be  full  emotionally  or  mentally  and  you’re  probably  tired  of  carrying  everything  on  your  own.  it  will  be  a  moment  when  you're  juggling  a  lot,  maybe  healing  from  something  heavy  like  betrayal,  heartbreak,  or  even  just  feeling  worn  out.  that  this  person  shows  up.  and  they  feel  like  a  breath  of  fresh  air.  it’s  not  just  about  romance,  it’s  about  peace.  it’s  like  they  walk  into  your  life  as  you're  closing  one  tough  chapter  and  starting  something  softer,  calmer,  and  way  more  aligned  with  where  you're  going.

WHERE YOU MIGHT MEET THEM think  a  party,  a  casual  get-together,  somewhere  that  feels  familiar  or  safe  like  a  friend’s  place,  maybe  even  your  workplace.  could  also  be  the  gym,  or  a  graduation  type  event.  basically,  anywhere  that  blends  your  personal  growth  with  a  social  vibe.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ PILE TWO so  the  way  you  meet  your  future  spouse  will  be  kinda  chaotic  but  in  the  best  way.  it  feels  super  fast,  super  unexpected,  and  honestly  might  catch  you  totally  off  guard.  i’m  getting  big  “we  met  online  or  while  traveling”  energy.  maybe  you  slide  into  their  dms,  maybe  it’s  a  dating  app,  or  maybe  you  bump  into  them  at  the  airport  or  during  some  random  busy  life  moment  where  you’re  just  not  expecting  to  meet  anyone  there’s  also  a  lot  of  talk  here  like,  a  lot.  this  could  be  someone  you  start  off  chatting  with  about  something  really  niche  or  interesting,  like  a  topic  you’re  both  weirdly  passionate  about.  it  could  even  start  off  as  something  super  casual  maybe  even  a  one-night  stand  kind  of  situation  for  some  of  you  but  there’s  this  pull  between  you  two  that  neither  of  you  can  ignore.  it  just  escalates  fast.  timing-wise,  it  feels  like  this  happens  when  you  (or  them)  are  in  the  middle  of  letting  go  of  something  that  wasn’t  working  anymore  maybe  a  relationship,  a  job,  or  just  old  emotional  patterns.  both  of  you  might  be  in  this  place  where  you’re  done  settling  and  you’re  craving  something  real,  something  that  actually  feels  good  and  aligned.  and  even  though  neither  of  you  is  really  looking,  the  universe  kinda  shoves  you  together  anyway.  after  you  meet,  things  move  quickly.  like,  a  lot  of  texting,  calls,  late-night  convos,  maybe  even  making  plans  out  of  nowhere.  it’s  that  “everything’s  changing  all  at  once”  kind  of  vibe.   you’ll  probably  both  be  really  focused  on  your  own  growth  at  the  time.

WHERE YOU MIGHT MEET THEM online  for  sure,  but  also  bars,  clubs,  school,  during  a  lecture,  a  sports  event,  in  transit  like  airports  or  train  stations,  maybe  even  just  randomly  at  a  park.  wherever  it  is,  it  won’t  feel  like  a  “fated”  moment  until  you  look  back  and  realize  how  wild  the  timing  was.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ PILE THREE you  and  your  future  spouse  will  click  in  such  a  natural  way.  you  just  get  each  other.  the  energy  feels  super  balanced  like  you're  equals,  and  there's  this  low-key  vibe  of  “wow,  we  really  work  well  together.”  you  might  meet  them  during  a  moment  when  you're  trying  to  make  a  big  decision  or  when  you’re  in  a  setting  where  talking  things  out  is  a  big  deal.  maybe  you're  speaking  up,  defending  an  idea,  or  just  sharing  your  thoughts  in  a  way  that  really  shows  who  you  are.  it’s  definitely  a  mentally  stimulating  situation.  lots  of  conversations,  debates,  bouncing  ideas  around.  you  both  feel  pretty  self-sufficient  at  the  time  like,  you're  not  looking  for  someone  to  “complete”  you,  because  you  already  feel  whole  on  your  own.  there's  a  mutual  respect,  a  kind  of  clear-eyed  understanding  that  you  both  bring  something  real  to  the  table.  the  place  or  vibe  around  your  meeting  could  be  somewhere  open,  honest,  and  maybe  even  a  little  professional  like  a  work  thing,  a  social  event  that  has  a  purpose,  or  even  something  tied  to  politics,  activism,  or  community  stuff.  it  could  also  be  something  more  fun  or  celebratory  like  a  festival,  workshop,  or  a  group  project  kind  of  situation  where  people  are  vibing  and  collaborating.  you  might  even  meet  after  hitting  a  big  goal  like  graduating,  landing  a  job,  finishing  something  that  took  a  lot  of  work.  and  when  you  do  meet,  there’s  this  strong  feeling  of  admiration.  like,  you  genuinely  respect  each  other  from  the  jump. 

WHERE YOU MIGHT MEET THEM offices,  group  projects,  college  or  uni  events,  workshops,  festivals,  social  gatherings  with  some  kind  of  purpose  behind  them.  stuff  where  people  are  connecting  over  shared  goals  or  ideas.

[steppenwolfslair]

No people are not wrong that Nevecanis feels canon rather than Rookanis

An analysis (and vent) on the poor writing of the whole romance situation. A long post for those that want to read. I need to get it out of my system because more than anything this ruined my first playthrough. I know this has been talked to bits but i was recently reminded of this and it ruined things for me again while playing.

NO NEVE HATE ALLOWED, don't come here with that home wrecker bullshit.

First let's start of with saying i will be looking at what the actual text and game shows me here, no hc's, no fics just the pure canon. When the in your face text actively contradicts all of the ”subtext” a lot of people like to throw around it isn’t subtext, it's wishful thinking and making things up. We are sticking to the WRITING.

No Neve isn't a distraction, it isn't a casual relationship meant to fail. It is supposed to be genuine, Lucanis by the end of the game does love Neve and Neve loves Lucanis. Endgame convos show us this, especially if one of them dies. It isn't lust or distraction or whatever, it is a real genuine relationship. We are shown this through many lines of banter and interactions. And Spite likes Neve too i don't know where this started but Spite is fine with Neve. Stop reducing Neve and making shit up because some people just can’t handle the fact that the writing for all of this isn’t well done.

Now there is the first coffee date which i LOVE and shows that Lucanis isn't an awkward bumbling ''doesn't know intimacy'' dummy, he can flirt, he can show that he likes Rook but the game after this scene completely forgets that.

There is a very weird personalty split with nevecanis and rookanis when ti comes to Lucanis later in the game.

The problem is this: Lucanis actively pursues Neve, flirts and shows interest. He is completely capable of showing it, he isn't the closed off traumatized assassin people paint him, the game shows us this repeatedly. With Rook it is the complete opposite, stonewalled and disinterested, if someone acted like that way to your flirting you would leave them alone because you would think you were making them uncomfortable which is what it often feels like with Lucanis and Rook.

There are few moments besides the very end game that Lucanis actually reciprocates feelings, one is the lean in kiss that amounts to nothing that is never talked about and addressed and one is a RECYCLED Neve scene that is actually very sweet and insightful when it's about her but with Rook it flows incredibly awkwardly like it's missing half it's conversation. Yes acts of service are a way to show love but this is literally a recycled scene that seems far more friendly than romantic because it WAS meant to be friendly (and like i said lucanis is very capable of being romantic, he isn't an awkward little uwu i don't know how any of this works type). And then to add salt to the wound Nevecanis actually gets a follow up scene to that which confirms their feelings for each other, they get an ACTUAL verbal lock in scene that Rook doesn't.

Then we go on to the banter, Rookanis gets three lines of romance banter through the whole game with three different characters which are... fine. While Taash gets a whole series of banters with Neve same as Lucanis with others. If in party they constantly have little tid bits about what they do together and how their relationship actually progresses. Rookanis doesn't get any actual progression. Hell nevecanis banter with Taash actually talks about spites whole deal in the relationship which is never mentioned AT ALL with Rookanis. The post Talon conversation is mostly about spite with a VERY awkward lucanis standing next to Rook scene and a ''whatever this is'' I'm sorry but after all that game time this is what the relationship is? “Whatever”? And then after a whole bunch of nothing I’m sorry the end game scenes and convos are completely out of nowhere.

And don't even get me started on that little flower comment in the grove, that one legit made me sad that Lucanis wants to get flowers for Neve but a Rook version of that doesn't exist. It made me so pissed that no one writing it thought “maybe the player would like something like this”

Sure we save him from the mind prison, Rook is obviously close to Lucanis and definitely friends with him but if you had Neve and Lucanis in your party a lot like I did (and no matter what some people claim they very much flirt with each other) Neve showing up in there 100% feels like another nod to the fact that he is very much interested in HER. There is a little nice sincere bit of dialogue in there for Rook that however feels disjointed because this man has been ignoring me for most of the game at this point.

I'm sorry but the writers did an abysmal job with this relationship. More on Lucanis' side since his content is cut to shreds because from what I've been told Neve doesn't elicit the feeling of being ''the second choice''. They gave me a love interest who is more actively interested through a lot of the game in someone else and then gave them more content, in fact used Rook as a bad fill in for Neve's content.

So with the actual game you are very correct at being bitter, disappointed and robbed of a good/meaningful romance. Without fics without a shit ton of contradicting hc's and mental gymnastics Lucanis is far more into Neve than Rook for most of the game and then then definitely later when Neve and him get together.

And look this is a problem with two writers obviously not cooperating, MK getting real shit treatment at bioware (but let's not let her completely off the hook, the woman stated she hates writing romance and has received criticism before for it) ,the general unfinished nature of Lucanis' character and the fact that Neves writer definitely overdid it with the ship. Which while does give an explanation and context doesn't suddenly change the situation that it makes the player feel like ass when they find all the nevecanis info.

DATV is never beating the ''these are the writers OC's and you are here to watch them'' allegations for me.

You are allowed to feel sad and bitter about this, I still am. I feel robbed and lied to after seeing everything that Nevecanis gets that Rook doesn't. I've also seen that Neve doesn't suffer the same fate of '' i feel like she's settling'' because the game makes their relationship far more active with an amazing lock in scene and actual good reactivity.

And you can still like his in game romance for what it is I'm just saying these complaints aren't coming out of thin air, they come from the game itself showing you things that make people feel this way. After seeing the Nevecanis clips i wanted my money back. I love romance in games and here I am seeing that a side ship is meant to be more canon than my characters.

And istg if someone brings up Lucanis being demi as an excuse i will block you, demi people can be romantic (which Lucanis can be just not with Rook only in the nevecanis route ), they can flirt (which Lucanis does on the first coffee date and with Neve frequently), demi people can be very sexual (something that is alluded to with Neve banter with Taash). Stop using acephobic rhetoric to try and wash away bad, janky, unfinished writing. Demi people don't all act the same and a lot of you are projecting a stereotype on Lucanis that he isn’t (or projecting your own demi experience which he isn’t). Lucanis isn't an uwu baby who doesn't know anything about intimacy, who shies away constantly and just gets so confused and scared of flirting all the time it’s just that the writing didn’t care about Rookanis enough to show what he actually could be in a romantic relationship with Rook (see cut gondola scene and mined dialogue that went with it).

Also i couldn’t care less about what MK posts on bluesky, that isn’t in the game, it isn’t in the canon. If you want to keep to it fine but we are sticking to actual text here on my blog and this post.

EDIT (i reblogged with this but adding it to the og post too)

I just remembered this too: no matter what, even if you never go through the lock in convo for neve and lucanis to happen, lucanis still professes his feelings for her at the end game to rook saying he ''feels sorry for never telling her how he felt''.

So it really is canon that he will always like neve first and foremost.

Who in their right mind thought this would be a good experience for the player? Did absolutely no one playtest the lucanis romance and see that “hmm this feels like shit”

God this is so badly done.

[privateanxieties]

a few observations about Frank Castle in the new episode (spoilers below):

the pain meds/other type of prescription meds

My guess is they're pain meds because Frank must be in constant chronic pain by now given everything he's done and still does, and he's not the type to take any other kind of meds, such as anxiety/depression/etc.

2. the wall of crazy behind him, his general surroundings

This is a man at rock bottom, but then again, this is kind of his baseline. He's never had need for anything beyond rudimentary lodgings, but at least before (S1 Punisher) he was still somewhat living among people. Frank has removed himself from all human contact and lives in a seemingly abandoned building with no creature comforts to be found. It's just the mission, the tools to accomplish it and the bare minimum to keep him going.

3. his general state of mind

I've seen this expression on him before - in the hospital, with Karen, after he thought he'd killed innocent women in S2E11. And I'm sorry, but his conversation with Matt doesn't really warrant this expression?

Frank reserves moments of great vulnerability like this for talking about his family. And he does talk about his son briefly, but this lingering shot of him with this heartbreaking expression seems disjointed. And I can explain why, I think, through a simple observation. Right before this shot, Frank is situated here in the room:

somewhat behind the weapons rack, definitely behind the lamp in the corner. the items are clearly in front of him from a depth perspective.

Then, immediately in the next shot, Frank is here:

The lamp(s) are clearly behind him, the TVs are behind him, the weapons rack is behind him. He's much closer to where Matt had been standing just moments prior, near the entrance. And I don't think this is a continuity issue per se.

This shot looks like one you'd use to drive home something devastating that the character has just experienced. You'd use it to linger on some terrible thing that just happened. I'm not sure this shot is the natural conclusion of Matt and Frank's convo. Maybe they reshot the scene and rewrote lines. Maybe the content of the conversation changed purpose. I think they used this shot because it's really impactful and I wouldn't want to waste it either, but it doesn't really belong from a sequencing perspective.

I mean, here it is again, if you think I'm delusional:

I just feel like this is from a different sequence of events, or the result of a different conversation. With how disjointed everything else has felt thus far, I wouldn't be surprised if this was also a victim of editing/rewriting.

[mscherub]

What Twst characters would say based on interactions I’ve had with my friends 👍

Characters: Prefect, mainly first years, mentions of others + professor(s)

Warnings:

Swearing, mentions of drugs, rude words, yall sorry for this—

Most convos were twisted to be a little more PG…

Also, I’m a girl and most of these experiences were at school and from my pov so if they seem a little harsh, MBBBB

KEY: Prefect is what I said in the situation, Everyone else is what my friends plus others have said <3

Chaos below the cut guys, good luck—

Prefect sits down at lunch table

Ace: ew, you’re here?

Prefect pauses

Ace: I’m jokinggggg

Prefect: bitch

MC sits down at lunch table, Epel has his phone out and has a picture of Vil next to a picture of Jeffrey star

Prefect: “Shit…”

Epel: “I know, right?”

Prefect: “similarity is uncanny.”

Messaging GC

Prefect: luv u guys, Gn <3

Ace: Fuck you

Prefect: Fuck you, too, dude, smd

Ace: love*

Prefect: KYS U WHORE, and I meant to spell it that way

Sebek: everyone go to bed

Messaging Gc again

Deuce: wht arw u gya ar

Ace: what did bro say

Prefect: mans is typing in hieroglyphics

Deuce: DID U JUST XALL ME TYPIBF HEIRIGOPLDUGIS

In PE

Epel: Y’all, don’t fall, there’s water all over the—

Slips and fucking falls on his face

Prefect: BRO, nice one

Epel: fuck you

In class

Prefect: can I see your work? I promise you I won’t copy like word for word, I didn’t have time to do the assignments last night

Deuce: wait…what work?

Prefect: …

Stares at each other for a minute than nods, sighing and looking away

Jack: what does “she hawked on my tuah mean…”

Prefect: uh, maybe don’t figure that one out

Sebek: I heard in response to a phrase like that you just say, “Skibidi”

Prefect: u know what…I’m done

Prefect doing most of the group work with the first years

Ace: Thank you my trusty slave

Everyone looks at him appalled

Prefect: what…the fuck

Ace: sorry, slave

Forgetting a literal child was there

Prefect: then I said, “you’re just a carpet muncher—“

Ortho: what does that mean?

Prefect: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO, NOOOOOOOOOO, IGNORE THAT AHHHHHHH

Jack: I can’t believe you’ve done this

Ace: I hawk and I hawk and I tuah your house down

Deuce: you need to hawk tuah your way to therapy my guy

Prefect: I can agree with this

Ace: but, Prefect, aren’t you the therapist friend? Why haven’t u been helping me then…

Prefect: …

Internet goes out at school, supposed to take test online (I know Trein prefers old fashioned way but pretend for a bit…)

Trein: unfortunately we can not take the test

Everyone: Professor Trein, Trein— it’s fine, really, it’s ok :)

Prefect: eughhh, that’s a big bitch!

Points over at a guy who did ortho dirty

Prefect: eughhhh that’s a guy with a small di—

Sebek: HUMAN, DO NOT SAY SUCH TERMS, if you’d want to truly get back at him, let us go together to fight

Prefect: awww, Sebby

Some bitch is talking shit on Prefect and Jack, the relatively nice ppl of the group—

Ace: I called in reinforcements

Prefect + Jack: huh?

All house wardens proceed to come to defend yall…

Prefect: I���m…wtf, why…

Ace: they all hate that kid, too

Prefect: what—

Prefect: ALL I HAD TO DO WAS TAKE A PISS, BUT NO, I WALKED INTO THE BATHROOM AND PPL WERE SITTING IN SINKS AND IN THE STALLS SMOKING AWAY, LIKE WHAT GRADE ARE WE IN AND WE’RE DOING THIS?

Ace: that’s…rough

Prefect: I wouldn’t be surprised to walk into the bathroom one day and see someone snorting a Coke line…

Epel: nobody would be, believe me

In PE class again, everyone lines up on the line

“The fitness gram pacer test—“

Prefect: I just got war flashbacks

Jack: it’ll be fine, just breath through your nose and out through your mouth

Prefect: ITS NOT THAT EASY WTF, THATS LIKE ASKING ME TO BREATHE UNDERWATER

Prefect peacefully walking then— BAM, backpack gets pulled back by someone behind them, causing them to stumble back

Prefect: WHATTTTT

Ace: hiiii

Prefect: unhand me!

Prefect: Ace…Ace, Ace…ACEEEE!

Ace ignoring everyone

Prefect: dude…

Looks over in another direction and lies to get his attention—

Prefect: I see the bitch that u hate with the wig

Ace: WHERE?—

Sitting at lunch table, eating, cater pulls out phone and snaps pics

Prefect: wtf man

Cater: cause :)

Prefect: whatever…don’t post it on your story

Cater: :(…ok…

Does it anyways

Prefect and Grim walk in, Prefect carries Grim in arms

Prefect: how many hours of sleep are you all going off?

Ace: three

Deuce: three

Jack: three

Epel: three, don’t tell Vil

Sebek: three, as well, Human

Ortho: charged for three hours, battery levels are lower than usual…

Prefect: Oh my seven, we’re all like…twinning today!

Yayyyy

Grim slams lunch tray down which is piled with food

Prefect: dude…

Grim: I’m hungry

Ace: too hungry, clearly, ya big back

Walking back on campus back to ramshackle, wild turkeys square up around Prefect and Grim

Prefect: if this is how I die I’m not gonna be happy

Grim: I thought those were trash bags, oh well, let’s eat them

In locker room

Ace: smells like ass and chlorine

Jack: that’s oddly specific

Ace: it does tho

Epel: BE MANLY ABT IT BRUH

Ace: Kys

Epel: well damn

(Idk the context for that one)

That’s it cause I can’t think of anymore— and I know some of these weren’t that funny, BUT THEY ARE TO ME

Part two maybe :3 ?

Master List

[domm1etae]

sent to tempt me - chapter eleven

chapter eleven: hidden underneath

chapter summary: Are Yunho and Mingi finally starting to get along? It sure seems like it, especially after their breakfast conversation…. or not?

pairing: yunho x mingi

genre: smut (not yet but there will be eventually), angst, fluff, romance, m/m, non!idol!ateez, sub!yunho, dom!mingi, drama, coming of age, collage, religion

rating: 18+ (for the whole series bc there will be smut eventually) | mdni

word count: 2.1k

warnings under

collage, roommates, sub!yunho, dom!mingi, bad boy mingi and religious church good boy yunho same-sex attraction, m/m, teasing, dark themes, homophobia, self discovery, pet names, strangers to lovers, religion and religious topics, aaaand more will be added soon hehehe

previous chapter | next chapter | AO3 | this fics masterlist

author's note: heeey, sorry today's chapter is shorter and not that packed, but i'm taking my driver's license test in 2 days and i'm super stressed and studying A LOT!! after i'm done, there will definitely be more chapters coming. ps. i'm currently watching spy x family, that's why i chose it hehehe

Yunho shut the door to his room, pressing his back against it as he exhaled sharply. His heart was still racing, his mind running in circles around everything that had just happened.

Mingi wanted to be friends. Not just tolerate each other, not just coexist—but actually be friends.

The idea sent a strange rush of warmth through Yunho’s chest, but it also left him reeling. It didn’t make sense. One second, Mingi was teasing him, pushing him into uncomfortable situations, acting like Yunho was some nuisance he had to put up with—and now he wanted to get along?

Yunho groaned, running a hand down his face as he stepped further into the room. The way Mingi had looked at him—so intense, so unreadable—it was burned into his mind. And that comment… You’re actually pretty cute. I like your kind. Yunho shuddered at the memory, unsure if it made him embarrassed or if some part of him liked the way it sounded coming from Mingi’s mouth.

Nope. Not thinking about that. He shook his head, forcing himself to push the thought away. He needed clarity. He needed someone to help him make sense of all this. And he knew exactly who to turn to.

Grabbing his phone off his desk, Yunho quickly pulled up his messages and typed out a text to Jisung.

Yunho: Hey, I have something I need to talk to you about. You got time tomorrow?

The response came quicker than expected.

Jisung: Ohhh interesting. I’m hanging out with two of my friends since it’s Friday tomorrow, but you can totally join us. They give great advice, so they’ll add a lot to the convo.

Yunho hesitated for a moment, a small flicker of anxiety creeping in. He hadn’t expected Jisung to invite other people. What if they judged him? What if they didn’t understand? But before his nerves could fully settle in, excitement took over. Maybe this was good. Maybe hearing different perspectives would help him figure things out.

He took a deep breath and started typing.

Yunho: Amazing. When can I arrive?

Yunho woke up the next morning to the soft glow of sunlight filtering through his blinds. Blinking groggily, he stretched his arms over his head, his body still heavy with sleep. It took him a second to remember that it was Friday—one of his lighter days. Just two classes before he was free for the weekend.

He sat up, rubbing a hand over his face before swinging his legs over the side of the bed. He didn’t bother putting much thought into his outfit, grabbing a pair of jeans, a black shirt, and his hoodie. As he pulled the hoodie over his head, his gaze landed on something small and familiar resting on his desk—his rosary.

For a long moment, he just stared at it. He hadn’t been to church once since arriving at college. The realization made his stomach twist with guilt. His parents would be furious if they knew. They would probably disown him, or at least have a long, soul-crushing conversation about his ‘drifting faith.’ The thought alone made his chest feel tight.

With a sigh, he reached for the rosary, letting the beads slip through his fingers. He used to wear it every day back home, a constant reminder of who he was supposed to be. Maybe he couldn’t bring himself to step into a church just yet, but he could at least wear it. That had to count for something, right? Maybe he’d even look up some services online and go this Sunday. That would make his parents happy… if they ever found out.

After a brief hesitation, he slipped the rosary over his head, tucking it beneath his shirt. He didn’t want people to stare or ask questions. Keeping it hidden was easier.

Shaking off the unease curling in his stomach, he grabbed his backpack and headed for the bathroom. A quick splash of cold water helped wake him up, and he brushed his teeth, letting the mundane routine ground him. When he was done, he slung his backpack over his shoulder and made his way into the kitchen.

Yunho stepped into the kitchen and immediately froze.

Oh. Right.

He totally forgot about this part.

Mingi was already there, leaning against the counter with a mug in one hand, his phone in the other. White wired earbuds trailed from his ears, one tucked loosely beneath his silver hoop earring. He wore a black and white striped sweater—slightly oversized, the sleeves pushed up to his elbows—and ripped black jeans that hung low on his hips. Rings adorned his fingers, a few silver necklaces layered around his neck, one of them catching the dim kitchen light as he turned.

Noticing Yunho, Mingi pulled one earbud out and paused whatever he was watching. “Good morning, roomie,” he greeted casually, his voice still a little rough from sleep.

Yunho’s heart did something weird in his chest.

It was just the way Mingi said it—so easy, like they’d been doing this for years. Yunho swallowed, nodding stiffly. “G-Good morning.” He quickly turned toward the fridge, opening it even though he had no idea what he was looking for.

His mind raced back to their agreement from yesterday. Okay. He could do this.

They were supposed to be nice to each other now. Friends. Or, well, something like that. And really, Yunho didn’t want any bad blood between them. If Mingi could act normal, so could he.

Gathering every ounce of courage he had, Yunho turned back, still gripping the fridge door. “Uh—” he hesitated. Then, before he could chicken out, he asked, “What are you watching?”

Mingi paused, blinking. “Huh? Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

Yunho hesitated, his grip tightening on the fridge door. “I, uh—” He cleared his throat. “I asked what you were watching.”

For a second, Mingi just stared, unreadable. Yunho braced himself for some sarcastic or dismissive remark. But then—

Something shifted.

Mingi’s whole expression changed in an instant. The usual sharp, dominant aura softened, replaced by something Yunho had never seen before. His eyes lit up, his mouth tugged into an excited grin, and suddenly, he was a completely different person.

“Oh man, okay, so—it’s Spy x Family! Have you heard of it? It’s so good, bro. Like, the animation? Top tier. The humor? Amazing. And the characters? Anya is literally the cutest kid ever, I swear. And Loid? The coolest fake dad to ever exist. Yor? Absolute queen. I just finished an episode, and I swear, every time Anya does something dumb, I lose it. Like—”

Mingi kept going. And going.

Yunho just stood there, completely frozen, watching in stunned silence as Mingi excitedly rambled about the anime. He was practically bouncing on his feet, hands moving as he gestured wildly to emphasize his points. His usual laid-back, intimidating aura? Completely gone. Instead, he was a total softie, eyes gleaming with pure enthusiasm.

It was… cute.

Wait. What?

No. No, that wasn’t the point here. Yunho shook himself out of his trance as Mingi finally paused to take a breath.

“You watch anime?” he asked, still processing.

Mingi grinned, nodding. “Yeah, when I have time for it.”

Yunho felt his face warm up. “I’ve heard Spy x Family is really good. Not just the story line, but the animation too, as you said. I wanted to check it out, but ever since college started, I haven’t had time.”

Mingi gasped dramatically. “YOU’RE AN ANIME FAN?!”

Yunho scratched the back of his neck. “Y-Yeah. Probably not as big as you, but…” He hesitated for a moment, then admitted, “I actually speak Japanese pretty fluently. Or, well, at least I think so. I haven’t used it in a few months.”

Mingi’s jaw dropped. “Bro, what?! You’re like my hero.”

“What?” Yunho blinked, caught off guard.

“I’ve tried learning Japanese, but I suck at studying,” Mingi groaned, running a hand through his hair. “I think my pronunciation is pretty decent, though! Watching anime helps, but man, it’s hard. You gotta tutor me or something.”

Yunho turned even redder. “N-No, I’m not that great…”

Yunho kept his head down and focused on preparing his breakfast, still feeling flustered from their conversation. But just as he took a bite, Mingi’s voice cut through the silence again.

“Yo, Yunho.”

Yunho glanced up mid-chew. “Hm?”

“Come closer.”

His chewing slowed. “…Why?”

Mingi sighed, rolling his eyes. “Oh, don’t make me come to you myself. Come on, I don’t bite—unless you want me to.”

Yunho nearly choked.

What the hell did that mean?!

Mingi raised an eyebrow expectantly, and despite every alarm blaring in his head, Yunho hesitantly stepped forward. Before he could process what was happening, Mingi suddenly reached out, grabbing him by the collar and yanking him closer.

Yunho froze.

Brain: shut down.

Body: completely rigid.

Soul: leaving his body.

WHAT IS HAPPENING. OH MY GOD. IS HE GONNA BEAT ME UP???

Mingi’s grip wasn’t rough, but it was firm, and Yunho barely had time to panic before he felt a light tug at his chest. His eyes darted downward just as Mingi pulled his rosary out from under his shirt, letting the small silver cross dangle between them.

“I knew I wasn’t making it up,” Mingi said, examining it closely. “You were hiding something under your shirt.” He smirked slightly. “It’s your rosary.”

Yunho swallowed hard. “Y-Yeah. I, uh… I’ll take it off. I left it on by mistake.”

At that, Mingi’s expression shifted into something unreadable. His smirk faded, replaced by something more serious. “Why?”

Yunho blinked. “Huh?”

“Why take it off?” Mingi frowned slightly, letting the cross rest against Yunho’s chest again. “It looks pretty. And super cool, actually.” Then, tilting his head, he added, “And I think you’re kinda lying to me.”

Yunho stiffened. “W-What?”

“Nobody leaves something like this on by mistake.”

Yunho bit his lip, looking away. “…I just don’t want anyone making fun of me for having a religion.”

Mingi scoffed. “Making fun of you?” He shook his head. “Trust me, nobody will. People will just think it’s a jewelry accessory, not an actual rosary.”

Yunho stayed silent, still gripping the hem of his hoodie.

Mingi studied him for a moment before sighing. “But, y’know…” He leaned back against the counter, crossing his arms. “If you have to hide your religion from people, doesn’t that kinda say something about what kind of believer you are?”

Yunho’s breath hitched. His fingers curled slightly, pressing into the fabric of his hoodie.

Mingi tilted his head. “Like, if it’s something you really care about, shouldn’t you wear it proudly?” His voice wasn’t mocking, just… genuinely curious.

Yunho swallowed, unsure how to answer.

Mingi sighed, then suddenly stood up, stretching. “And even if someone does have a problem with it…” He rolled his shoulders before shooting Yunho a confident grin. “Just call me up, and I’ll deal with them.”

Yunho’s head snapped up. “Huh? Wha—”

“You have my number, right?” Mingi added, winking before casually slinging his bag over his shoulder and heading out of the dorm.

Yunho just stood there.

Processing.

His face burned. His heart was racing.

What… just happened? What was that?

Yunho had no idea what to focus on first—Mingi getting that close to him first thing in the morning? Ugh. But shouldn’t he also feel at least a little offended? What did Mingi even know about religion or what a rosary meant?

But….Mingi had a point.

Yunho hated to admit it, but he did.

If he truly believed in God, if his faith was something he held close to his heart, then why was he so afraid to show it? Why did he tuck his rosary away like a secret—like something shameful?

His parents would say it’s because the world was cruel. That people would ridicule him, tempt him, try to lead him astray. That he had to stay vigilant and protect his faith, not flaunt it.

But was he really protecting it… or was he just afraid?

Yunho exhaled sharply and ran a hand through his hair. Ugh. No. Stop thinking about it. This wasn’t the time to spiral over religion. He had class. He had things to do.

…And Mingi.

You have my number, right?

Yunho blinked.

Wait. No. He didn’t have Mingi’s number.

Why did Mingi assume he did?

Maybe Mingi thought he gave it to him at some point? Or maybe they were already in some group chat for the dorm floor, and Yunho just forgot to save his contact?

Still. The way he said it so casually, like Yunho should’ve already had it, like it was natural for them to text—

Yunho pressed his palms into his cheeks. His face was burning. God, I need to stop thinking about this guy.

With that, he grabbed his bag and left for class, determined to focus on anything other than his roommate.

Oh, and the rosary, stayed, where it was—hanging freely over his shirt, out in the open.

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[us3rnam3-r3dact3d]

In honor of your wonderful update, an ask for you, my friend!

I'm struck by the real, raw, loving dynamic of Milo/Sweetheart you so expertly depict I'm FFAU. Can you say a little bit about how long Milo and Sweetheart have been together at this point in FFAU and how that comes into play as their argument from last chapter takes hold, please?

I ask because I'm wondering if Milo has realized that Sweetheart is the type to feel her emotions only when they feel safe enough to do so? It's such a tricky habit, you know? If you define "safety" as being alone (safe to say, Sweetheart learned to do), then it's easy for them to come across to others as if they feel nothing. But I can tell in your work that in reality, they do feel and feel everything all together as a torrent, tumultuous rush once the danger is over. And Quinn is certainly a walking mountain of danger, meaning sooner or later, when the dust clears, Sweetheart is going to be in DEEP with feels.

That was a long mess of context to ask, does Milo know that's how Sweetheart operates? He's probably never seen them deal with something as dangerous as Quinn. Is he prepared to help Sweetheart when that moment hits? Does he see it coming or expect it? Will he be taken off guard by it? Will Sweetheart continue that pattern of isolation without Milo even being aware? Is this new information to him that he's ready to handle?

No pressure to respond if I'm asking stuff that's spoiler-y (or any other reason)! Thanks for sharing your work!

My friend!! I’m so glad you enjoyed the chapter. I figured this one would hit hard for you. Our convos have really informed my understanding of Sweetheart and Milo. Just know every time I write them, I’m thinking about you!

So in the continuity of the FFAU, Sweetheart met Milo in 2017 and they were dating before the year was out. So at this point they’ve been dating for 8 years and own a house together.

I think that this argument is one they’ve had before. It’s a fight they’ve had on a much smaller scale. Sweetheart struggles to express their emotions, and they struggle even more to ask for help. It’s something their brain tells them is a weakness, and a weakness is not something they can show. It’s shown up in smaller ways, most notably when Sweetheart handles a big emotional upset in their life and doesn’t let Milo in on the matter until they’ve finished processing it. They feel like they’re saving him the headache of “dealing with them” and Milo feels like they’re depriving him the opportunity to be there for them. Deeper down, Milo is afraid that they don’t trust him enough to let him do that.

When you’ve been with someone for that long, you form patterns. You circle the same problems until you figure out how to unravel them. The issue here is deeper seeded for Sweetheart. They have done this for their entire life. Milo, likewise, has been surrounded by people who do this. Sweetheart is intentionally similar to Colm in many ways, as a sort of reference to how we chase what we already know from our childhood in our adulthood. Colm also pushed everything down until he could safely feel it, he just let it out in much less productive ways. Sweetheart doesn’t let it out like he did. In fact they don’t let it out at all.

That sort of blankness Sweetheart gathers around themself is a form of control. They appear calm and collected because their emotions are so out of their control. When they can’t control their emotional reaction to the situation, they thrown down the walls and don’t let anybody see it.

Milo knows this is happening. He’s seen it happen on smaller scales. He has the patience to slowly ease those walls up and help them feel safe enough to tell him what’s going on. The difference now is their life is in danger and he is scared. He’s scared, so his own less than ideal coping mechanisms rear their head.

They’re pushing him away? They don’t want him. They’ll throw away the family they’ve built. They’ll destroy everything.

Sweetheart is pushing down their emotions to an unhealthy and dangerous extent. Milo is treating them as though they’re just like his father.

Yeah. Messy situation. If either one of them can get over their own shit, they’ll be able to help the other. They are at boiling points in their temperaments and they will spill over.

He is capable of helping them. He just needs to set his own bullshit aside. Sweetheart is capable of helping Milo. They just need to set their own bullshit aside. It’s a common thing for many relationships, the couple’s individual issues rubbing awkwardly against each other. They will figure it out, but it’ll be when they’re both capable of approaching it as a team and not on their own. Tall task when people’s defenses are up, but if any couple can do it, it’s them!!

More is coming my friend and I hope you’ll enjoy it!! Thank you again for hopping into my askbox!

[rorysterr]

Matchup for @foxboyxyn

⊹ ࣪˖🍹⋆˚✿˖°🧡⋆.˚

i straight don’t know why but I can’t respond to your ask so im just gonna tag you!!

Your romantic matchup is…

Mammon!!

- this one came to me immediately!!

- looking for someone to match your freak or bounce ideas back and forth with? say no less. mammon is super talkative and I think he matches your energy super well. you’ll never have to feel like you’re talking to a wall with him because he ALWAYS has something to say with you. it’s literally just constant back and forth convo with him, you will legit never be bored with him.

- I feel like you guys got along pretty well from the start. Both of you are sociable and talkative so I can’t see it being awkward at all when you too were first introduced, however, I think Mammon kept calling you a “lowly human” back when you first met because despite you two getting along, he still saw you as just a lesser than human, yk? but you’re also the type who doesn’t take much offense to anything like that so I don’t see this bothering you. if anything, I could see this annoying you but it doesn’t hurt your feelings.

- I feel like mammon would lowkey have a crush on you after he makes a pact with you but he’d try to deny his feelings like the tsundere he is and ask why he likes some human.

- also you’re basically his type canonically. he likes someone who’s outgoing and sassy and while you didn’t describe yourself as sassy, you’re def outgoing!

- I could see him spending a lot of time with you, like randomly barging into your room or dragging you into his money making schemes and hiding behind the excuse that Lucifer entrusted him responsibility over you so it only makes sense for you to be with him 24/7.

- but obv that’s not the case and you start to realize that he has a thing for you. everyone does tbh but mammon thinks he’s so slick and nonchalant so he’s convinced that only he knows but in reality the whole Devildom knows LMAOO

- I could also see him frequently spending the night in your room and him hiding behind the excuse that he’s too lazy to walk over to his own room or that it’s too messy to sleep in.

- i feel like he’d also lowkey get jealous or a little possessive whenever he sees you socializing with another dude in your freetime and he might even get a bit touchy but he’ll STILL deny his feelings for you.

- i think you would eventually have to confess to him and when you do, i can imagine him being super caught off guard and flustered. I feel like he wouldn’t even be able to look at you LMAO but when you pull him into an embrace, i could see him melting on the inside.

- he’s super social too so i could see him socializing with you! plus more connections could benefit him financially right?

- i feel like he’d be touchy in public. i could see him constantly having an arm around your figure or keeping you close because he wants ppl to know your his and he loves to show you off. you are lit his treasure LMAO

- i think when it comes to cuddles tho, he’d be more shy and would prefer if you initiated it.

- also i can imagine that despite his financial situation, he would always insist on paying for your dates. he likes to show you that he can provide for you and he shows his love through actions instead of words. you know you mean a lot to him when he willingly spends his money on you.

Your platonic matchup is…

Asmodeus!!

- this one also came to me pretty easily!

- i can see you guys hitting it off from the start because of how sociable and chatty the two of you are.

- i could see Asmo inviting you to get your hair or nails done with him and you guys just having yap sessions at the salon.

- omg and Asmo has SO many connections so i imagine that he knows at least some of the people you know and i could see you two gossiping about them LMAO

- he’s the type who you can have fun and more lighthearted convos with but whenever you’re vulnerable with him, he’s ready to beat ppl up for you LMAO he’s super protective of you and your enemy is also his. He absolutely WILL NOT stand for anyone who hurts his bestfriend.

Runner Up… Diavolo

[eternal-pie]

Bullfrog Headcanons

(New account version)

Pt.1 pt.2

Some are reader insert some are just general

I have seen no fics of this beautiful French man so I have done it myself

Just my thoughts in bullet point form

———————

he is an american bullfrog, he not only looks like one but also despite the name there are tons in France

He enjoys warmth and gets grumpy if he is too cold

I feel like he doesn’t touch you all that much but adores cuddling

If given the opportunity he will burry himself in pillows and blankets ( bonus if they are weighted) especially during winter cuz of his hibernation instinct

He will insist you join him and promise it’s very comfortable

He isn’t slimy like his real world counterpart but his skin feels very moisturized

He gets cold super easy and shove himself under your shirt or jacket to soak up your natural body heat

You also don’t have to worry about it being too hot to cuddle as he is cool to the touch

He will insist you let him put his cold ass hands on your bare back to warm them up , he will pout if you don’t let him

Letting him do this will more then likely result in him having his head under your shirt and his face pressed into your back and his hands on your upper stomach

He usually avoids conventional touch based pda, the most normal pda youlll get out of under normal circumstances is a peck on the cheek

Instead the way he shows touch based pda is by sitting on your shoulders

Although if he is super cold he won’t care all that much

And Unless your in a situation where being partners with him would put you in danger, he will be fairly vocaly affectionate

He will call you his beloved and other “refined” pet names

As well as praise, flirt and compliment you, though he sometimes gets shy after( especially if he fumbles the line)

He seems like a darling, my dear, love type of person

He will jokingly call you stupid ones as well

He has a lot of running jokes with you and will tease and joke around with you all the time, he just likes laughing with you in general

Some of your jokes might take a second to land with him in the beginning but as your relationship continues he will pick up almost immediately

He tries really hard to be cool cuz he wants to make friends but everyone being stuck on him being a frog annoys him a lil

He will complain about this to you at least once

He is trying to be cool and Poetic!

He is just in general, just a huge over dramatic dork

When he is mad he will begin to speak in a mix of French and English but he doesn’t really yell at all, he does talk faster tho

He will bath for hours but doesn’t like to shower

He cannot use certain soaps or he will get sick because he will absorb the chemicals through his skin

He likes the look of bubble baths but if he sits in them he gets sick cuz of the soap In the water

Given his accent I assume he speaks French but I think he can speak multiple European language, due to his job

He is very adverse to the idea of eating bugs, he isn’t scared of them but if someone offers him a bug he will be grossed out.

He is the kind of person to not only catch and release bugs he finds inside but he will have little convos with them too

You’ll hear in the other room “hello there my miniature friend.’’ And as he takes them outside “I’m very sorry but you cannot stay here.”

His approach to flying bugs is far different, he will take NO PRISONERS

He is very efficient with a fly swatter and knows all the concoctions to lure and kill fruit flys or other wise

He avoids using his hands cuz of the bug guts

If you are afraid of bugs he will find it amusing but he won’t tease or torment you, he will just chuckle at how ridiculous you look up on the counter while he captures the invader.

He is very polite and kind to everyone he interacts with unless they have done something to warrant other wise

He will use French sayings in English instead of the English version because he is convinced that “they are far superior”

Pins and needles are now ants, it’s raining ropes not animals, forget apples falling from trees, dogs don’t make cats.

If you use the English versions he will argue the French version is better

“bolt of lightning explains the felling of it, love at first sight is so bland.’’

Please convert he will find it unendingly adorable every time

He does get cuteness aggression and will randomly shove his face into your chest and aggressively nuzzle into you whist squeezing you and violently kicking his legs and making a happy humming

He will be embarrassed the first few times he does this

He will get cuteness aggression from your cuteness aggression

(the inescapable loop)

If you bite him he will be very confused but won’t care all that much so long as you aren’t hurting him

You will probably be taller then him and honestly he likes it that way because when you hug him he feels like momentarily he is a totally encased by you

You can carry him but only certain ways

No toddler hold, with one arm and him on your hip

Piggy backs, shoulder sitting and standing are encouraged

You can only sling him over your shoulder in emergency’s

Same with under your arm

He doesn’t like princess carry’s cuz he can’t hold on to much and he wants to touch with max surface area

He also doesn’t like the instability

Carrying him by his armpits away from you has the same problem, he will struggle

He does enjoy if you hug carry him with both arms, either his face in on your chest or resting on your shoulder

I have made a helpful diagram in case my descriptions made no sense ( I can draw but it’s just stick men cuz I’m lazy)

He will randomly start monologueing if given the opportunity

He will tell you about being an assassin but only if you ask

( please ask, his creed and brothers mean so much too him, and he want a too them with you)

I think he is more likely to be with Someone who has prior experience with fighting

He feels nauseous after producing bubbles

He will lean on or try to be touching you while he recovers

You cannot truly surprise him, he will know something is up the moment you even begin to plan

He knows because you act slightly different

And hiding or sneaking something past him is also impossible

He has to actively try to avoid finding out what your doing

You’ve snuck something into the garage? I guess he isn’t going In There for a while

Hiding something behind your back, he isn’t even gonna face your direction while you hide it

You cannot sneak up on him either

When you try he will scare you by suddenly turning around and grabbing you

On the other hand he has scared and surprised you accidentally many times by just quietly existing

if you hug him against your chest and look down at him You’ll be able to see him melt and look at you with the most lovesick look you’ve ever seen

He will also grow to enjoy you squishing his face

(He is sooo squishy)

He doesn’t understand what you mean when you tell him he has a squishable face but he enjoys the attention it gets him

——————

hope you enjoy and this inspires more fic to be written of bullfrog

[emis-cutesy-diary]

omfg i absolutely HATE HATE HATE W ALL THE PASSION IN MY HEART mfs w CRINGEY STINKY AURA that try to act like they be the ones done wrong in a argument/situation. Like OH MY DAYS why is ur victim complex so strong yet your grades so weak and ur face card is declining hella 🥀🥀. Maybe instead of venting to me and kyle and WHINING 24/7 go pick up a fucking book and fix ur own goddamn problems 😁. Its soooo fucking funny bc anytime i tell u abt my own problems u like SUDDENLY stop responding and go offline for lieeekkkk 1047758 fucking bussiness days ???? If I wanted to wait for a goddamn response i wouldve pigeon mailed that shi to u and wait 4 u to write back. Dawg we have technology for a reason and I would expect u to type back in lightning speed especially bc ur a fucking keyboard warrior w that crusty dusty musty rusty ahh ipad of yours. Speaking of books, im pretty sure u ac illiterate or sum shi bc tf u mean rise w a z??? R u genuinely homeschooled or sum shit bc the fact u cant even spell rise and all u gotta do is sound it out syllable by syllable 😃. Speaking of syllables, i think its absolutely hilarious that i fr be typing FUCKING 5000 WORD ESSAYS WHILE TAALKING TO U AND U RESPOND W A ONE SYLLABLE WORD. Im talking abt MLA format, introduction + body paragraphs + conclusion, Arial size 11, single spaced, and left aligned. Like im not joking i got receipts and the texts to pull up its gen crazy. Also why r u talking to some college guy while not responding to my texts?? Then u interrupt me halfway and then start complaining abt sum shi like “omg he wont respond to me” LIKE OMFG SYBAU AND AC ENGAGE IN OUR CONVO IF U WANTED ME TO SHUT MY PRETTY LITTLE ASS UP U COULDVE JUST SAID SO 🙏🙏🙏

And tf u mean, “yikes…” or “damn” DAWG. like bro is that ur only dialogue u npc?? i mean like i could say yikes to ur fit, to ur face, to ur greasy ahh hair, ur personality, etc. wait, not even YOUR personality bc that shi is borrowed from others tf 🙄? U so dry that u soak up the ppl around u w actual funny personalities but then u jst sound weird when u try to act like them. Like a fucking sponge. Ur acne matches up w the holes in a sponge. You also try to copy me and kyles personality and jokes to jst like jessica. Like omfg u so sensitive and a whiney ass crybaby it makes me want to punt you into the ocean and drown you like instead of complaining go fix ur own fucking problems dumbass hoe before i go fix ur face and stinky ass aura 😚.

Also lets not start about how u use AI to comfort ur friends…(which is a lie bc its crazy to think that u have any REAL friends and how ANYONE puts up w ur shit) u literally showed me a ss of u texting and comforting ur friend w “did i cook?” like girl no u did not cook chatgpt was cooking a whole damn five star meal in the kitchen while u sat ur lazy ass down and bedrotted while cntrl c and cntrl v’ed that shi. Also not only r u diddy irl but u also diddy online…calling me “kitten” LIKE VRO R U A DISCORD MOD??? “grrr…thanks kitten” WHAT IN THE HELLIANTE R U TALKING ABT 😭😞🥀🥀 dawg u make me so uncomfortable its not even a “silly little joke” atp 💔💔 i could go on and on for hours but im tired of thinking abt u bc youre weighing on my mind since ur so big 😁😁

ANYWAYS GUYS SPREAD KINDNESS AND DONT BULLY PPL 😁😚❤☺💞💗💕💖🎀

HAVE AN A-MAZING REST OF UR DAY 🫶🫶💞💕💗☺😋😋

[hismercytomyjustice]

My husband effortlessly outmaneuvered my OCD today. I am still in awe.

I didn’t want to go to my piano lesson. Last week was ROUGH. On top of still struggling with this more advanced piece, I had major migraine brain fog.

The good news is that I didn’t want to fake my own death or wind up in near tears after. Yay, progress! But it wasn’t the best experience otherwise. It was just really frustrating and humiliating to struggle so much.

This more advanced piece has been triggering my OCD like crazy too.

I told him I didn’t want to go today because I hadn’t practiced enough.

He responded with “So?”

It was exactly the right answer. Even though I still tried to push back with, “I haven’t made enough progress.”

And he was just like “The point of you going is to practice. And you did practice.”

“I haven’t practiced enough.”

“Not going isn’t going to help with that.”

T^T !!!

(extended OCD rant below the cut)

I had similar convos with my therapist where she’s insisted that the only thing I need to do for piano is show up for my lessons. That is the only expectation.

My piano teacher would disagree with that, lol. But I get what she’s saying. Because my desire for “doing it right/enough” is my perfectionism OCD talking.

Which is why piano is such good unintentional ERP for me. Because it upsets my perfectionism OCD so much. My therapist has said this multiple times now.

Lol, I also finally told my piano teacher I have OCD and that my OCD loves piano. In that it loves to tell me how bad I am at it. He was telling me last week, “Just play through, it doesn’t have to be perfect.”

Which has become his new mantra for me lately. orz I was playing some for my husband too to show him how far I’ve come and he said the same thing because I kept stopping when I’d mess up. “Just play it through.”

It is SO HARD TO though. Especially with how hard my OCD focuses on every single mistake I make. Which just leads to building anxiety and more mistakes.

I’ve had moments where I’m struggling while practicing and have literally had to tell myself “practicing will only help, it can’t make you worse at this.”

Because lord knows avoidance is one of my favorite compulsions. Because you can’t be bad at something if you don’t do it, amirite? (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

God, I also realized my OCD has eased up a bit when it comes to writing (sort of), but now it’s decided to focus on replying to comments on my fics instead. Something I genuinely enjoy doing because getting comments fills my heart with rainbows. It gets riled up with me trying to leave comments too.

My perfectionism OCD has decided this is a great time to overthink every single word I type. Just a constant stream of “You have to give the perfect reply to a comment, otherwise people won’t think you’re grateful enough for them taking the time to comment and they won’t want to read your fic anymore and they’ll hate you.”

And “You’ve left comments on other fics that people have said made their day. If you don’t leave a good enough comment or if you don’t comment at all, they’ll think you don’t like their fic anymore. You know how happy getting comments makes you. If you don’t comment on everything you read, that makes you a bad person.”

None of that is true, ofc. I know it’s not true. I know it’s not even logical. But it is all triggering my avoidance SO HARD. Because I can’t mess it up if I don’t do it at all! So now I have a bunch of comments that have piled up and a bunch of fics I’ve read that I haven’t commented on and I’m starting to ruminate on all of it.

And it’s just like…so objectively ridiculous. That’s not self-compassion, I know. But like, it feels so absurd to be in an OCD spiral over this. Where I am actively spending more time agonizing (ruminating) over the fact that I haven’t done either than it would take to just…reply or leave a comment on a fic.

Like. This is not a life or death situation. This doesn’t even have to be a situation! And yet the spiral continues. I stress, I avoid, I stress about avoiding. And I waste time and energy and brainpower on all of it.

I have the same issue with the other fics I’ve promised too. I’ve been deep into the final chapters of my kid!Alastor fic and hyper focusing on it as a result. But I have been talking about posting Part 8 of my Radioapple series for so long. I threw 8k words at it like a month ago and then started overthinking it and then started worrying about falling behind on my kid!fic. The same for the BG3 oneshot I drafted. All I need to do is edit it so I can post it. But editing to me = executive function (writing somehow does not…?). And, again, I wanted to get caught up on my kid!fic. So now I feel guilty for not finishing it and posting when I said I would.

None of this is anything I should feel guilty for! And I know that. I am doing all of this FOR FUN.

It is supposed to be fun!

AND YET.

Ugh. Not me over here like “My OCD hasn’t been that bad! Why can’t I get anything done?”

Because it picked new things to obsess over and I was late to the party on realizing that. ( ˶ •̀ ⤙ •́ ˶ )

I’m glad I’m meeting with my psychiatrist tomorrow. My depression has been better but now that I’m aware my OCD is ~clinically severe~, I’m hoping maybe she can help get me on something that will do more to help with it. Because while the meds I’m currently on are preventing me from a full blown relapse, I don’t think they’ve been very effective at straight up treating my OCD otherwise.

I’m really hoping a different medication will help. It’s just frustrating to be putting all this work into therapy and all, but not seeing more of a reduction in my symptoms.

Literally one of the questions on the YBOC is: “How anxious would you feel if you were prevented from performing your compulsive behaviors?”

I told her it wouldn’t make me anxious because I don’t WANT to do the compulsions. And if I had a magic button in my head that would make them easier to resist, it would be the greatest thing ever. The compulsions are what’s making me anxious. Most of the time I don’t realize I’m obsessing or compulsing.

So then I get frustrated and upset at myself for not getting things done and it’s only then that I’m like, “Wait, is this an OCD spiral?”

If I could get better at recognizing them sooner and acting sooner, I think it’d go a long way toward helping me. The thing is, I don’t know if this is a medication thing or a me thing and tbh I’m worried it’s a me thing. That I’m not doing something right, and that’s why I’m having such a hard time with it all.

I really hope that’s not the case. Like, I am DESPERATE to get out of these never-ending loops. I just really, really hope that the will is already there and that a different medication can help get my OCD under control enough for me to actually make progress.

T^T Guess I’ll find out tomorrow. Lol, not me stressing now that my psychiatrist is just gonna be like “Your problem is that you aren’t trying hard enough!” Because I think my problem is trying so hard to the point I unintentionally actively sabotage myself… Like I’m trying to fight perfectionism OCD with gasoline instead of water or something.

Ugh. Fingers crossed she can give me some better insight into all this tomorrow.

I’m just curious now too if my OCD has always been this bad and I’m only just now realizing it, or if it’s just been worse in general over the past year or so for whatever reason.

FIX ME, SCIENCE! FIX ME!!!

[rin-and-jade]

how can you begin to communicate if journaling hasn’t worked. there’s not back and forth convo or me not having memory of past entries. I just know I write things when I feel certain ways but there is no conversation bc it still feels like me .. just .. not me. and how do I know when I hear them vs when it’s intrusive thoughts or just my own thoughts? I would like to be able to talk and meet them. I want to know that they are real and not just me accidentally making it up or looking too deep into things. how can u know for sure that they are real and that you haven’t just overthought? that you haven’t willed them into existence?

If journaling hasn't worked, added by any lack of system activity as how you remember/wrote, you might have a more abstract experience rather than a direct one which is often discussed about; internal dialogue.

But it could also mean your dissociation barriers is still too high up the bar to facilitate healthy communication of the ability to self introspect, since internal communication is heavily affected by the slightest things such as brain fog, stress, lack of sleep, or physical/mental exhaustion. So, the first thing i would suggest you to do is putting aside your journal for a bit, try meditation (instead of writing things outwards, lets see how well you react to activities that requires to go inwards), and fix any stressor/needs that weren't met yet.

If you had done these two things for the past week with no changes, i will wait for you to come back, if something did change--or found something, come back earlier too! This is not a one-time-off advice, this is used to bring clarity to your situation.

Normal, intrusive, and alter thoughts are all different:

The normal ones are the ones you have daily, the things you plan to do next, planning meals, choosing your type of clothes for the day. It's characteristics will be having a consistent, uninterrupted flow,, being aware that it was thought by you, owned by you, innately.

The intrusive/impulsive ones ranges in a spectrum from uncomfortable (weird ones also counts) to panic-inducing. It is often short--a sentence or less, often associated with a cue too. Eg. you see a ledge, and your thoughts went "imagine dropping my phone down there" . Doesn't give the whole picture of what intrusive counts but its usually a thought barrages your logical or emotional reasoning in my own words.

Alter's thoughts are like the normal thoughts, but you can tell it came from a distinct perspective outside of what you were equipped with, oftentimes different accent, tone, or even the reasoning. A good way to tell if it's not an intrusive thought is if its capable of replying back or keep the conversation going. You also can attempt to deny/counter it whenever you have an intrusive thought to check which one it falls to.

Lastly, as hard as it sounds,, you cannot fake or will alters to being alive if you have a good cohesion of your integrity--which are singlets, or even me, an ex-system (yeah i final fused). It takes dissociation to do that, and i got no more dissociative coping mechanisms anymore, so its totally gone and silent in my head right now. Even if you still worry wether you truly have alters or not, its still a good idea to work on the unhealthy coping mechanisms that is not serving you well anymore.

- c

[sixosix]

THOUGHTS THOUGHTS THOUGHTS THOUGHTS- Akjsdhfaksljhflka Exam season ended earlier than i thought so it's time to poke for details! 

I gotta start off with me kicking my feet over my shared theories from last time. They weren’t fully right but AAAA

The fact that Thawed!Reader was a distraction to Lyney and Father leaving her alone all this time…asjkghhsgaf Her just casually mentioning, ‘oh yeah, I knew she couldn’t have gone far’... And her implying that she had already had a plan to deal with this type of situation before Aether interfered just says so much about her character. I wonder how different it was going to be, because it seemed like she was just going to leave T!Reader be until she actually interfered like now. Maybe use the potion still? Relocation? Her character both in general and here makes it seem like she wouldn’t just kill her without a second thought. 

Also, I like to imagine the research she did into Rosalie was not only to come up with a plan as to what to do now that there were new variables, but to make sure her child was at least going to be ok under Rosalie’s care. After her not-a-answer answer…. Adlkfhjasldkfjlaks Father cares in her weird way it's fine, don't worry.

I love the inclusion of the potion from her story quest by the way! I think it adds a more devastating twist than what I originally thought may have been on the line, like her life. Like, Thawed!Reader would be perfectly fine, but not only does she lose memories of all the recent (and previous) memories such as any positive moments with Aether or her familial connection with Rosalie, but also people who deeply care about her (Rosalie, our fauti trio, maybe aether and paimon?) suddenly lose their friend since her identity is so closely tied to being a part of the Fauti. From being one to becoming a runaway one, almost every action she has taken till now has been influenced by her past and if she accepts then it's all gone. I know you mentioned that Lyney would absolutely still chase after Thawed!Reader even if she took the potion and he had to start from the beginning(which absolutely see it ashdlaksh) but there is absolutely no way he wouldn’t feel any short of hurt by that. Even as he tries to woo her for a third time, he’s going to be holding on to memories he can’t tell her about for multiple reasons. Experiences he adores like sparing but she may not be able to do any more. 

(Speaking of the potion, i do have my own theories on what may happen with everyone involving that… but i’ll share that in a separate ask.)

The Knave’s and Rosalie interaction was so nice; both sets of parents really do be fighting huh. But while T!Reader’s and Lyney’s was a bit more high strung, the other parents feels a bit more like understanding each other. Not that they like it, i mean, look at Rosalie. It felt like two different parents trying to co-parent, if that makes sense? I mean, like I mentioned before, if the Knave really wanted to, she could have just killed T!Reader and even Rosalie and be done with it. But besides wanting Rosalie to act as bait; she mostly had a calm discussion, and seemed to keep Rosalie’s feelings in mind as a fellow parent of this kid. I mean, she even reined in the soldiers when they lashed out at our favorite flower shop owner in their blind loyalty. And her kinda silent approval at Rosalie’s answer about the potion? Why is the set of parents that includes a harbinger having the calmer convo? (Gotta ask as well! What flower did Father give Maman? Despite the meanings, I do think that considering her ascension materials, it may have been a rainbow rose. But if we consider other Fontaine flowers, Lumiose bells also fit well! And Romaritime flowers sadfasfasdf…) 

As for T!Reader and Lyney- akdfjalskjf THE PARENTS REALLY DO BE FIGHTING HERE! Dear god the tension rising in the situation, T!Reader is blinded by worry and anger while Lyney is partly blinded by love and his want to help. Paimon, Aether and Lynette are the audience at this point (although, gotta say, love the explanation to how they know there T!Reader lives! Despite how she’s acting now in the context of Rosalie being kidnapped, it was a perfect compromise to deliver the gift but let T!Reader keep some form of privacy. Too bad it is also working against the twins in this moment with  Arlecchino’s plans. Plus, they may have found out anyway due to the fact their crew of workers had also seen T!Reader around Fontaine in the past. All it would take was one of the workers going to Rosalie’s shop while T!Reader was working.)

Lyney almost said love!! My man had a confession moment!! Too bad that it was in the middle of a fight. That whole conversation had layers I want to poke at for more information. Lyney’s automatic confirmation of betraying Father for T!Reader, her calling Rosalie her mother to everyone, Aether’s hurt at her blaming him, T!Readers fixation on the fact that; from her point of view; Lyney is only taking and taking and taking.But it's her exit that caught my eye the most. It felt like a really cool parallel from back in chapter three when T!Reader gained her vision. 

Both times T!Reader was upset and angry, and Lyney comes in as both connected to the source of her problems as well as someone who just wants to help her. Both times she lashes out at people (the fight/freezing during the first and the cruel words plus biting cold in the second). And both times she walks away leaving behind a barrier of ice (technically it was a door covered in some ice in the second fight but shh we’re still counting it).

I wonder if Lyney also recognized the parallels as well, since his tone switched from stubborn and confident to weak pleading the moment T!Reader starting walking away! Just the echoes of it, I wouldn't be surprised if somewhere in lyney’s thought process was just like ‘not again, please not again’. All the effort and care he took into trying to not scare her off again just went down the drain by Arelcchino’s actions, and just like before, he’s unable to convince her to stay and let him help. However, this time, he has a lead in the form having some knowledge on Father’s methods as well as knowing that T!Reader is going to try and go after her to get Rosalie. And I’d be willing to bet money that he’s going to latch onto that and not let go. 

Also, remember how my first ask mentioned aether being a deadman once lyney found out that he blackmailed Thawed!Reader? Yeah I think we’re at that point, we’re gonna see this man go feral like he did in the fortress. Not to mention Rosalie and (maybe) Arlecchino’s reaction. I doubt Arlecchino will actually do something since the potion is already her plan but I’m sure she’s curious about how the traveler pushed up the timeline. And I doubt Rosalie is gonna be a happy maman once she learns why her daughter started hanging out with the Outlander. 

P.S, totally for absolutely no reason in particular… how do you feel about fanfics of your fanfics?

-deadman aether anon

HHEHEHE IM SO GLAD U STOPPED APOLOGIZING FOR LONG ASKS its about time…. WE LOVE THIS SHIT!!!!!

- father does care!!!!! and it shows even in canon lore!!!!!!! ofc the children wont have it easy and they wont be spoiled rotten with affection but i think thats what makes arlecchinos way of doing things even more special and i rlly wanted to incorporate that here toooo

- yesss:( mc’s entire identity is VERY tied to her “past” as a fatuus! of course lyney wouldnt be happy about mc forgetting everything that made their relationship, because what they had was very special to him!! (and i would love to hear that potion train of thought)

- i think i didnt write it clear enough which is my fault! but the flower i was hoping to hint that arlecchino was giving to rosalie was the “Snezhnayan” flower that Arle bought from her a few chapters ago. fun fact i didnt want to assume to whatever hyv had planned for snezhnaya flowers, but i wanted it to be a flower that had originated from khaenriah but still became relevant to snezhnaya. so to rosalie, it was just an imported flower, but it was one that was unique enough to make her remember whoever bought it!

- and yes HAGSHAHA i found it hilarious to write in that rosalie and arlecchino would have a calm meeting while lyney and mc are a mess and a half. i think it shows that they both have a long way to go before they reach the same level as the other two:)))

- THE PARALLEL!!!! YUUPPPPPPP i wanted to reference it in the next chapter too in case people didnt realize it but im glad u caught it BAHAHAA

- i guess we will find out if aether truly will be a dead man next chapter…. Didnt even get the chance to reunite with his sister ohhh poor boy. this is why u dont blackmail someone! learn from aether, everyone

- ALSOHELLO??? fanfics of my fanfics? oh. PLEASE. hello. YES! i would absolutely love to see how people interpret my series and the characters within them:( that would be such a joy!!!!!! but i also just want to see how people think of thawed!lyney HAHAHHA

[proveagain]

i rewatched s6 p2 earlier this week with my dad, and sorry i'm gonna ramble again because going from the frustrated scenes that lead to the locker room blowup -> the plane heart-to-heart with j.ohnny -> the 'you're a natural leader' convo with r.obby after he lands just feels SO clunky... i thought it was just because i had binged all the eps at like 2-3am that first night, but now i can tell there's at least one or two scenes in there that they cut for time. i'm not disagreeing with m.iguel's reaction to the 'you're my son, too' line because i know that's been something he's been needing to hear since after prom in s4, but the show insinuating that m.iguel's frustration is solely because j.ohnny has been favoring r.obby over him (i know whatever scene that was got cut for time bc ... vine vc bitch where) comes out of nowhere???

firstly because the 'support' j.ohnny gave r.obby didn't make it off the cutting room floor (i know he's not talking abt part 1 bc j.ohnny made a point to be unbiased and support m.iguel and r.obby evenly before the captain qualifier), but also because feeling ignored by j.ohnny was never even hinted to as a motive for the desperation m.iguel has with the captain spot in 6 part 1. he and r.obby had figured out their shit from that type of thing in s5 (another thing the writers tell instead of show but that's a rant for another time). his whole desperation for winning the taikai is that m.iguel thinks it's his only shot at swaying the stanford admissions board. he was giving d.emetri a run for his money in the 'shut tf up abt college' race in 6 part 1, and he was so preoccupied with his plan to get noticed and change the board's mind that he completely ignored and invalidated r.obby's feelings.

the main reason he's upset with j.ohnny - and with everything at that point - is that everything comes back to that lack of control he's felt on and off since season 3. j.ohnny just finished telling everyone that the results of the taikai could have them 'regretting everything for the rest of their lives' (get that '84 guilt out of here), right after telling m.iguel that his own victory on the mini platforms didn't mean shit (the only time where m.iguel did feel ignored by j.ohnny, and it wasn't to hype up r.obby bc j.ohnny sat there yelling at everyone in the locker room after), and that he the rest of the team were still going under. they're on the way back to los angeles because his mom got rushed to emergency surgery, another thing he has no control over. there's a couple lines from j.ohnny about 'not thinking like that' when j.ohnny's sharing his worry about not having control re: c.armen's situation, but i don't think that was stressed nearly enough to progress his narrative and show that correction. ideally, i think doubling down on that with a heart-to-heart with c.armen in the hospital about m.iguel fearing the risk of something happening to her again would have done that really well.

that mention of the real motive was also missing from his pep talk with r.obby after he gets back to barcelona, watered down to 'oh i was being an asshole sorry,' and i think it was a disservice to the bond they keep trying to say m.iguel and r.obby have had since s5. a lot of their 'fixing things' convos get watered down to the most basic shit, when the very core of their 5+ season conflict has always been abt miscommunication. they deserved a longer scene talking about both m.iguel and r.obby's frustrations before m.iguel started hyping him up, and i know they glossed over it because of time.

tldr: if i had a dollar for every time a character got cheated because of the short eps + cluttered character roster i'd have enough money to buy the show myself

[eddsboxofdisectiontools]

Not even gonna entertain it aside from this post and this is so stupid of a situation that I'm not even going to tag it but like. Yeah I'm going to mention if somebody is hiding something like being proshipper. I sort of just block and ignore people who make it clear on their profile except for untagged posts, convos with friends, or if I'm asked something about it, but proshipping is a serious issue if you aren't somebody who is completely braindead in the topic of psychology and how the brain works and finding out that somebody was secretly supporting proshipping is the type of thing that's really not okay, and even if we put this into a weird "antis vs proshipping" thing I wouldn't even bother if somebody did the same thing for somebody who is anti and was like "omg just found out oomfie is anti they don't have it on their profile I'm so sad" because it's a serious fuckin boundary especially for children and abuse victims so can't complain when it's done back. If anything, I'd prefer it be done back so we don't even gotta deal with people finding stuff like this out the hard way. But I just think hiding that kind of information in the fandom a show for kids is maybe just a little bit peculiar and I have every right to be distraught about it and let other "antis" know so they can set boundaries and block 😵‍💫 that's not cancelling, people really use that term loosely, if anything I'm inviting proshippers over there. I'm just trying to keep people who are uncomfortable with it comfortable because fandoms can be a safe space for people and this can help it feel safer for people who have the "anti" view ❤

Lowkey this is probably about as much as I'll say unless somebody takes it to a personal and legal level (yes, it's happened before. Yes, it was stupid as shit.) because I think anyone who has basic human empathy can understand boundaries and why people may be a little upset if somebody hides something about their morality. Countries are falling into fascism, removing the education system's educational aspects, and creating people with failed logic and a false sense of superiority for topics they've never actually studied on a scientific and peer reviewed level. I meet these people every damn time I go outside and I'm not really shocked there's mild forms of such online (clarifying this because I don't believe proshipping is fascist; I feel like my words will be twisted if I don't clarify) trying to convince other grown adults that I am some sort of evil for letting people in my specific group of specific viewpoints know when somebody has hidden a viewpoint from us that affects their image. We've got people who think vaccines cause autism wandering around, and the literacy rates are at an all time low for adults in a particular country I'm sure we all know. If they want to play victim because I mentioned that somebody hid something very important to their morality, whatever. I've had worse. There is worse out there. Once I'm given access to psychological studies and get to research stuff that has been underresearched or vague, I probably won't create posts longer than one or two sentences if somebody hides information like this. I don't support attacking and I block anybody who I believe might go after somebody because I mentioned them in one of those "quick note for those who feel more comfortable with these people blocked" type posts. I'm a straight A student, early into college, with at home education of psychology and philosophics of such obtained from only peer reviewed and/or credible sources. I have no doubt in my mind that I know what I'm talking about when I protest the profiction concept, so I've sort of just stopped caring. For anybody that feels like reaching out because "ohhh somebody's talking about you!!" don't bother. I grew up getting called an armchair professional because people think the source's credibility changes as soon as the textbook leaves college campus, don't waste your time on trying to make me feel better just because some people are unfortunately very strict about their belief system, even when all scientific studies proves against it. People suck, it's whatever. Don't feel bad bout keeping yourself feeling safe. It's why I let people know when this information gets hidden from view. If you can make the internet feel a bit less nasty than the outside world by blocking away proshippers, go ahead. And I encourage proshippers to do the same, and also include their status as such in bios. You don't gotta, but if you don't, I would want you to understand when somebody from the opposing side finds out and lets people know so they can create a boundary.

Seriously, the world looks like shit out there. Let's be respectful when groups of viewpoints find out somebody they know has the opposite viewpoint secretly and lets people know about it. I'm going to fight for more and more peer reviewed, replicatable studies on the effects of profiction mindsets so that this information is easily accessible, even to those who don't study it for fun, but honestly I'd rather keep the actual proshippers outta my space. If the proshippers wanna keep the antis outta their space, too, that's cool. Sadly most of the studies that reveal the impact of profiction content are scattered across topics and delve into different forms of proshipping rather than the entire topic as a whole, so many profiction people try to claim that because it's not broad spectrum, it's false. Not my circus, not my monkeys. I'm not falling into the danger so whatever. Can't stop somebody from doing something if they truly believe that they're correct. Just don't wanna associate.

I know this was a long post so for the MAYBE 4 active followers I have, and for the 1 that perhaps actually read this entire mouthful, here's my pigeon Prism ❤ I've begun working with raising and bonding with undervalued species recently and she's such a cutie! I can't wait to learn more about the brain function from first hand experience with her behavior. She's quite the character so far.

[tales-from-nocturnaliss]

Okay people real talk. You know it's serious when someone who never watches videos actually sits down for thirty minutes to do just that.

I'm not a big typology person because basically I already love psychology and astrology and all the things that like to create labels and explanations for personalities and picking from each what I find valid. That's how I do know my typology (INFP), but I never looked more into it. I'm a Mediator. Okay cool.

Then my bestest buddy @cicidarkarts shared a couple funny videos about her typology (I laughed beyond tears it was so fitting) and I enjoyed this dude's presence and figured I'd find mine. I choked in my laughter.

I stopped laughing when I rabbit-holed into this video right here.

This is all of me, give or take some autism traits and a couple issues already worked on. But this is me - the super friendly little introverted butterfly who self-paralyzes while considering EVERYONE before herself when deciding what to say or what to do. Chronic fatigue is one reason I disappear from socials at times. Other times it's just that I choose to live in my own little bubble, sometimes at the detriment even of friends when I lose track of the world for days on end (granted there's some AuDHD here at work)

And I genuinely feel like I will not amount to anything in my own life and this part of his funny INFP video actually no longer funny now that i've watched the above.

You know what else isn't funny? Yeah i'm connecting to the INFJ type entirely and did not realize until NOW that I'm actually INFP. Or so the test said. Let's take a second here to throw rigidity out of the window, and for me to throw out "oh gods I got it wrong I should probably delete this post now" reasoning and put my foot down and state: yes, I mixed them up, but I connect to the J in all these meaningful ways so fuck 'the test' and I'ma now follow what feels like personal truth instead.

You really can't begin to imagine how much energy I spend/waste considering others' feelings and emotions before posting, or reblogging, or doing anything that might lead to problem situations. Just earlier I checked my notifications and I'd been in this convo with someone about writing, really not vibing with their state of mind but still tried to be supportive, saw today I'd gotten a response starting with "with all due respect" and I just nope noped myself outta checking the response out. But part of me feels bad for likely having been upsetting. It's my default mode of operation. I'd feel it my duty to go check out the response just because it's the 'polite' thing to do since the other person took time to respond and just. No. Please no me STOP enough. You don't want to, you don't want to; fair, done, move on.

I have been losing my mind (positively) in an AU in April and genuinely it feels god, but watchign that whole video is making me second-guess myself now. Am I just doing that apparently typical unhealthy disconnect thing? Just. Me. STOP. All that energy going into all these worries and I cannot keep myself from doing so and gods do I want to though. I'm so tired. Beyond just bad sleep. So, so fucking tired. Of me, essentially. I'm 44 and it's true: I have no idea who I am. I have thoughts on who I manage to be, what my core values are, but me specifically? Not a fucking clue. I exist. Isn't that enough? Every character of mine is a piece of me. Does that work?

Speaking of which but my decade-old friendly psycho who came back full force into my head feels like the best influence right now because he doesn't stop to care about any of the things that are my default personality. He has mean comments for everyone (including me), hit on my bestest buddy a few times (through me!) and he's the little voice in my head that just takes over and speaks up and overrides my safeties into typing up his responses. And there's something genuinely freeing about not second-guessing myself, just doing (also cuz he's mean but he is so in a way that is somehow charming. Tall lanky pale white-haired 2000-yo teasing vamp would have all the ladies in the ship comms)

I've been working a lot on me these past months (and years) but y'know what? Kinda getting tired of working on me. Kinda just want to exist as me, make it fun, not work, because I may be a work in progress always but then if I'll always be a wip, why bother trying to complete me? (that whole perfectionist part in the vid? Hit. Hard.)

Anyway I had this moment and decided I'ma SHARE the moment with y'all (who don't care lol that's fine, just doing what I needed to for me) and now Ima watch the INFJ self-motivation video (another 30 minutes) and take of it what helps because I swear I do have books in my head and I'd rather start spending energy thinking of how to share my world instead of dreading I'll never manage to. Such. Waste. of energy. When you realize that sharing is as simple as, y'know: SHARING. (okay but I also want to complete a genuine book)

You'd think I'd be tired writing this up but actually gave me energy. Funny how that works.

(edit: this part right here? I think I fluctuate between INFJ and INFP depending on how well I function on a given day because thank you autism. And this is the thing with strict labels: individuals are unique and spectrums unto themselves. Take what feels right, not what people might tell you is right because hard rules etc whatever. Psychology, especially is NOT an exact science. Generalizations are only that. They're not perfect truth)