#it's just iffy going places by myself sometimes

[umemiyan]

i need to use my PTO and take a vacation but i have no idea what to do that would be interesting but not cost a lot

[ponett]

this is gonna sound a bit odd, but playing your game has given me a bit (lot) of an existential crisis.

SLARPG is the first game I’ve ever played where I have felt represented. Ever.

2077 got close but I felt uncomfortable with how my character behaved sometimes and all of the visual options were skinny or some form of stereotypically attractive. Plus the pronouns being tied to a voice made me feel very iffy on the whole character creator.

Plenty of other games had the right vibe going on, but I either didn’t really identify with it or it wasn’t the right flavor of lgbt lol.

But SLARPG, with its characters Claire and Melody, and how they interact with the world. It made me feel like I could actually place myself in a character‘s shoes. Maybe it’s just me but at no point in my life until now did I get immersed into the character I played???

Sorry if this is misusing the ask box, I just didn’t know any other way to thank you for making this beautiful game without showing my blog or personal details.

i'm very glad to hear this! this is true of much of the cast, but melody in particular was very much just me being as self-indulgent as possible and going "well if no other piece of media is going to give me this type of protagonist then i'm going to make her myself." i'm glad she means so much to people

[imagionationstation]

Hi IS!! I seriously hope you're actually taking a break from Tumblr and social media instead of reading this haha, but I've been a follower for a few months now and couldn't help but send in a little post after seeing your rant. As someone who grew up with 2012 and adores it, and also as someone who respects Rise for what it is, I understand. 2012 is a huge comfort show to me and I've definitely gotten upset when all people do is go out of their way to tell you how horrible the show is without reason. 2012 is by no means perfect!! I am extremely aware of its flaws, but I don't believe that gives anyone permission to go out of their way just to ruin it for you. To target the one criticism that drives me a bit nuts, the "real brothers" thing. Rise has a very valid interpretation of brothers! But as someone with 3 other siblings, it is not sunshine and rainbows all the time. My older siblings would make me cry, we would fight and get hurt and hurt each other all of the time, my younger sibling would tattle on me, etc etc. But we also look out for each other, and have grown out of many of those things since then. I see a lot of my own sibling situations in 2012. Sure, it doesn't get everything right (and can be purposefully exaggerated because it is a cartoon!!), but it isn't wrong either. Everyone has different family experiences, and believing that Rise is the only correct interpretation of siblings would just be a bit narrow minded. I have many, many more points I could make in regards to the sibling ordeal (and other criticisms you mentioned!) but I'll leave it here for now. Overall, just enjoy what you want to enjoy! This goes for everyone. Someone is always going to want to rain on your parade, don't give them the power to do it. It's so much easier and less tiring to spend your time enjoying something you love over dunking on something you hate. :)

Thank you <3

As I mention over here, not really in a place to drop it yet, but I may sometime in the future. Your support is greatly appreciated!

As someone who grew up with 2012 and adores it, and also as someone who respects Rise for what it is, I understand. 2012 is a huge comfort show to me and I've definitely gotten upset when all people do is go out of their way to tell you how horrible the show is without reason.

Exactly! I have nothing against rottmnt. RISE is a great addition to the TMNT fandom. It has its highs and lows like anything else. It didn't deserve the dislike that many fans gave it in the beginning.

So why does 2012 deserve the exact same treatment after its time is over? Why doesn't it deserve the same respect for its diversity?

They experimented with some awesome and iffy things.

Some things worked and others didn't. Why can't we leave it at that?

I try and read the opinions that say "I like this, this, and this, but-" and ignore anything that is pure hate or comes from an account that has never said a single nice thing about the show.

But even then, it's often always the same old list of complaints.

And, like, Donnie is downright awful with his comebacks but sometimes I find myself doing the daily quote thing to the screen when I come across someone who is being supremely unreasonable.

(Not that I'd ever actually say that to anyone. It's my stress vice.

But. I definitely think it. Very hard.)

To target the one criticism that drives me a bit nuts, the "real brothers" thing.

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH BRINGS ME AN UNNAMABLE JOY.

You hit the nail right on the head!!

My family dynamic is so similar to these boys. One of my siblings very seriously told me a few days ago that I am not at all attractive, but a few weeks ago, the same sibling also reassured me that I deserved a love interest so much better than any person the world has handed me. Freakin' Raph impersonator over here.

Literally, I have siblings who interact like Leo and Raph. Constantly trying to be the superior in the relationship and hating when the other bosses them around. But you'd almost never find them apart because they are the other's shoulder to lean on.

I'm not anyone innocent either. I've said lots of things that I didn't mean in the past and I still slip up from time to time. I'm the type of person to be annoyed with a sibling and smack/shove them. My siblings do the exact same! Teasing and mocking and crude words aren't anything crazy. It's just how our fam do family.

I have a sibling who is just as insane and annoying as Mikey, but it's so frustrating because he's either purposefully stirring chaos and then laughing when we get upset, or so innocent and confused when I'm getting mad at him for doing something similar a while later.

We get so tired of it. But it's not his fault. He's untreated ADHD and lives his life to the fullest. What you gonna do? Stifle that? Please.

We get so tired of each other.

But we're always the first to have each others' backs.

Overall, just enjoy what you want to enjoy! This goes for everyone. Someone is always going to want to rain on your parade, don't give them the power to do it. It's so much easier and less tiring to spend your time enjoying something you love over dunking on something you hate. :)

Thank you so much. I always try to remind myself of that, but some days it can be hard. I really appreciate your kind words! I hope anyone reading this is also making note of them.

I don't ever want to be a hater.

Going giddly over the boys being themselves is so much more fun.

[sessakag]

Hi! I'm really curious about your writing process because you're writing so many stories simultaneously which i think is really impressive. 💖 Do you already know what's gonna happen in the story such as the ending? Do you outline the plot before starting a story or is the plot decided as the story goes? Do you also forget what happened in the previous chapters so as that you have to reread them before writing the next chapter?

My writing process can be summed up in one word: chaos.

Absolute chaos, no joke. I am always all over the place, bouncing from one fic to another, files everywhere, folders everywhere, docs everywhere, like omg, its so disorganized on my side of the fic but its like a disorganization I can navigate quite easily most of the time😅and yes, I write a lot of stories simultaneously, but its on a bigger scale than folks see, lol. I've been working on 8 unpublished stories at once alongside Prey and Butterfly for the last month or so🤔my brain is just always going, and it switches from one thing to other, sometimes within minutes, sometimes days, sometimes hours, and then I get super fixated on whatever has my attention at the moment and the words just come pouring out of my brain😅I do take breaks when my hands and wrist start to ache, though that only makes me think of more stuff to write about.

I usually have a very clear vision for my fics, they're like movies or tv shows that I live through and experience inside my head, but the majority of the decisions on how to get to point A to B are made on the fly and I do not constrain myself if the story takes me somewhere other than the "clear vision" lol. I'm allergic to following guidelines. I just can't write like that, I have to like, feel the story as I write and if I can't experience the feeling of it then I go a different route, planned or not. it's hard to explain it without sounding like a crazy lady���but yeah, I'm all feels and instinct with my stories, not much deliberate structure, though I have tried that before, and I was bored to tears and started dreading writing. Prey is a prime example of this. I planned on writing it one way, Prey!Naruto told me no🤭

I know how just about every single one of my fics are going to end already. I may not know how I'll get there, or what will happen in between, but I do know for a fact how they will conclude(unless the story demands a different end, but it's not likely to happen I don't think). I've already written the end for Butterfly, Monster, A Cure For Love, Prey, Dirty Little Secret, most of my unpublished fics and partially finished Secrets but I'm iffy on that one since I'm torn in two directions on how to conclude it. Once I get to the sequel I should have a better feel for it. But yeah, the end of these stories are already ready, they're just waiting for me to get there😂probably one of the reasons why I linger so much on fics so much🤔I already know they end and wanna have fun until the party's over🤭

I do forget things sometimes and need to re-read my stories, though for the most part, my fics are like movies I've seen a million times and I remember them just fine. I mostly re-read to pick up the momentum I had before I left, or to "get back in character" with the characters in the fic. Like if I've been writing Prey for an extended period of time, and then want to go to a fic where Naruto is more in line with his canon self, I'll have to re-read the story to put that hat back on, or listen to music that's less idgaf trap rap and more Naruto OST🤭but forgetting what happened in the previous chapters nah, not really. Not unless I'm having an episode or something, lol. Then Idk wtf is going on🤭

Anywho, hope this answered all your questions, but feel free to ask more!

[georgiapeach30513]

Peach! ❤️

Mrs. Pasta dropping by to wish you and your followers Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas to those who celebrate!

Also…I hope you and your family get to spend some quality time together. You are such a bright and shining presence always on here, and I commend you for being so strong. Please know that you don’t always have to be, but I understand this place is your escape and you want to avoid the negative. Totally respect that. I hope you bake a lot this Christmas! ☺️

Also, I recently watched Red One on Amazon and I loved it. I’ll admit I was surprised and also was going to skip it but I’m so glad I did not. This movie was made for someone like me (not sure what that says about me 🤣) and I will be rewatching and rewatching. Might I add that the movie is still making money in theaters and was still in the top ten this past weekend despite being on streaming for two weeks already. It’s still #1 on Amazon. But sure, nobody is watching it.

For anyone who may be on the fence or is iffy because of critics and online chatter, if you like Harry Potter and the Santa clause you will enjoy this film. That’s the best I can describe it, because both Santa clause and Harry Potter are pretty much classics in their own right now but both still have some very obvious elements of cheese. And honestly, I don’t think either SC or HP as much as I enjoy both, are award winning caliber either. However, people will still rewatch these movies year after year and I really can see Red One being this in the future. I myself have seen it twice already. It’s a really easy watch and Ramen had me amused and LOL-ing because he is so dang goofy. For anyone who has watched (this is not a spoiler), did you notice how Jack runs? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I loved how he made an effort to make his character run a certain way IYKWIM.

The industry/internet has been pretty tough on both ramen and the rock lately, and while I think criticism is warranted in some ways, I secretly hope for some letterboxed critics to get a taste of their own medicine in the near future. So quick to judge and hate when bet most of them didn’t even bother to watch the film or let’s be honest, pay attention to any of ramen’s upcoming projects. Like, ANY. But I find that sometimes subverting expectations is the way to go. I kind of find it refreshing his next few films aren’t really on the GP or average cinephile’s radar. Highly anticipated or extremely big budget with huge Names cast movies can be extremely risky and I for one am glad he chose some lower key projects because they all sound interesting to me. And the expectations may be subdued because of it, which leaves room for the element of surprise.

Lastly…just to leave you all with some subtle shade today. Imagine believing and taking to heart every Ramen comment from 2004 until now (even if he could have changed his mind or gasp, maybe even lied!) as gospel, unchanging, but ignoring when another person is quoted in two separate interviews that they claim to split their time between living in NY/LA 🤣 and europe for the past few years. Just because it doesn’t fit your fantasy. Interesting how conflicting narratives are always running about and most don’t ever seem to question it because they’ve made up their mind what they want to believe and anyone who disagrees is delusional. That’s how they getcha every time. 🤭

🎄🎄🎅❤️❤️❤️

Until next time. Enjoy the holidays, and stay sweet and superior as you are 🥰

Mrs. Pasta!! Thank you for popping by with a visit today! And I wish you and yours a Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

Whew...I know I don't always have to be strong, and yet, I always feel that is one of my roles in my family, so it bleeds over into everything else. But it is nice to hear that every once in awhile. Which is why I come on here, because it is a not so serious escape. Or it should be.

It's funny you should mention Red One at the box office. I saw a chart and how it made over $1M, still in in the top 10, despite being on Prime Video. I hope everyone paid for their subscription so you can watch it. It has become a favorite in my household. It's goofy, silly, but still has some heart to it. That's what a Christmas movie should be.

I keep comparing it to The Santa Clause as well, and that's a big deal because that is my favorite Christmas movie of all time, and we will be falling asleep watching it tonight. I think those that have not seen the movie, should kindly step back when talking about it. I don't care about opinions from people who didn't watch. People who have a holier than thou attitude when it seems that Santa has brought them some coal for Christmas. It's a lot easier to be kind, but that's a story for another day. Now I'm going to need @annislittleshopofhorrors to make gifs of him running.

I have noticed people having his last 8 projects with movies he cameoed in or had a small part in. But of course, whatever they need to do to make themselves feel better. Not every actor is going to be for everyone, and I have decided if I don't like an actor to not be talking about them. So, if anyone has sent in an ask with a certain someone's name it in, I won't be posting. Out of sight out of mind. It seems like some Letterboxd critics aren't fans of Ramen, so I'm not sure why they need to watch his movies. But I guess some people are gluttons for punishment. You know, when I don't like something, I don't get it attention. But of course, people do love to be superior while making fun of another.

But I do look forward to Ramen's future endeavors. His upcoming movies seem fresh, out of his comfort zone, he's working with new people, he's choosing scripts that I didn't see him choose (Priest Dean, anyone?). He's choosing smaller roles, characters with questionable morals, and it's nice to see him expanding his acting chops.

I do always love when you get shady, it makes me giggle inside when you use logic. But we should always pick and choose what we want to listen to. We should always take people's opinions as proof. We should always think that everything in Hollywood is as it seems. We should live in a fantasy world where everything is always perfect, and the way that some say that it is. I don't think that's how reality works, but again, I'm just a...nah, I won't give anyone that satisfaction today. It's Christmas Eve.

As always, Mrs. Pasta, thank you for dropping by with your words of wisdom. And I hope that you have a lovely holiday season. Hopefully it isn't too cold where you are. Maybe some snow?

[bookscandlesnbts]

they must have been planning/talked about this for a long time since the application process starts so far in advance, and then they went on their japan trip so would’ve had moments alone nearer to the enlistment time so of course they would have private moments to talk, but it also must be so difficult when you’re moments from actually enlisting and there’s btb staff cameras, media cameras, parents and family, 2 enlisted members and everything! so overwhelming - the moment where JK rubs JMs head and JM looks away then back at him, and that long look they cut at the end of the btb felt so…. heavy

Hi anon. Get ready for some all over the place thoughts because honestly, I’ve been having a hard time. And I knew I would, but even trying to anticipate this and getting myself mentally “ready”, I am not ready. I was not ready to say goodbye to Jimin, to Jikook to any of the members. And I’m not fooled. 18 months is a long damn time. If it’s this hard on day 2, then I need to prepare myself. I need distractions. If I still get anons, and can come up with things to post, then I will stay active on here. I have no one to gush about BTS with in my real life and even less so now that they are all gone to MS. I made it 2 minutes into Jimin’s last live and then I couldn’t do it. He was devastated. He was holding back tears and we know from a decade worth of content that Jimin is not one to cry easily. He waited until the very last second to cut his hair. It really broke my heart to know that he has to do this and doesn’t want to at all. In fact, I spent pretty much all of yesterday and the day before crying and now I am having moments where I break down if I’m alone with my thoughts for too long. Don’t be fooled either. It’s not just Jimin. I’m furious that all the members and every citizen has to. That MS is mandatory. But I’m not going to talk about that or go further into my thoughts on it.

I figured it would only be a matter of time before we learned more about the application timeline, but I knew it had to be far enough in advance. If I had even known that a companion enlistment existed, I would have called it from Day 1 that they would enlist together, but I sadly can’t claim that.

I hope they got as ready as they possibly could. It seemed like the reality set in for JM and JK during their lives, and unlike some of the shittest most obnoxious parts of the fandoms (yn cis hets looking at you) that claimed that JK was going to be so excited to go and want to even stay longer, he wasn’t. He wasn’t at all. His live was short and somber. He also said that he was iffy about it. I know BTS didn’t want special treatment, and part of me is glad that they didn’t get it because of the uproar that it would cause, but it’s still awful that they had to do it at all. I have to trick myself sometimes into thinking that it’s not what it really is just to cope.

The way Jimin bent forward to JK showing him his head made me cry. He needed comfort and approval, and JK just rubbed it over and over and looked away from Jimin for a minute. I think he was overwhelmed too. Of course, he complimented him which was so sweet.

I’ll be honest, I’m pretty terrible at noticing footage cuts, but that one was SO OBVIOUS that if I can notice it, then it’s really bad. I can’t even speculate what was cut because I’m not creative but my guess is that they said something comforting and private to each other.

In summary, I hate this. I knew I would hate it. But it’s so much more painful than I could have imagined and I think it’s because JM and JK were both so sad in their lives. And don’t get me wrong, I’m so so glad they were honest with us. That’s how you know that they aren’t “fake” and “scripted” like some idiots want all of the members to be characters in a tv show. They are human and they bared their human emotional souls to us. And it broke my heart and it will for the next 18 months. I think about how long we have been without Jin already and it sucks so much. But we will be there for each other. We will try to have little joys and experiences. We will work on ourselves and improve whatever it is we want to improve or achieve. Or some days or most days we will just fucking exist. We also don’t have to do anything monumental or special. Existing is enough too. Existing until 2025 when they reunite.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Attention TADC fans!

I'm officially opening requests for characters! Below the cut will be my base list of rules in regards to requesting and that sort of thing!

To everyone who followed me for creepypasta, do not fret! Creepypasta is still this blogs default and I'm not going to stop writing it for the forseeable future, I will still be responding to creepypasta based asked in the meantime

oh also, im adding this right before i post this but i do have fluff alphabet requests open for creepypasta, but to my TADC fans, how do you guys feel about the possibility of me reposting that list and letting you guys ask for it? im still kinda itching to do alphabet stuff... let me know ! ill probably do it anyways but i want yalls input!

without further delay:

RULES:

please do not spam requests, i know it will be hard to enforce this on my end since i want to keep anon enabled since i know it can be intimidating to ask for stuff non-anonymously

since the main cast + caine only totals to 7 characters i will allow people to request the entire cast in any given request, WITH THE KNOWLEDGE that the more characters the shorter their list of hcs will be

please do not pester me to answer your request, i will very likely answer your initial ask. consistent breaking of this boundary will result in warning, and if further boundary breaking takes place, the request will be terminated

^SHOULD NOTE! sometimes tumblr eats the requests you guys send in so simply asking if your request made it through is 100% totally fine!! I'm specifically talking about people who try to pressure me to answer sooner, I want to make that clear because I do not want to discourage anyone from reaching out about that sort of thing

Reader is GN by default, you can request a specific gender but know it likely wont be important due to my writing style

WILL WRITE:

SFW, angst, comfort, hcs, short imagines and scenarios!

As mentioned I will do all characters, asides Bubble since I don't think there's much that can be done for them

Poly, LGBT, readers with disabilities and/or disorders (will let it be known here that i am in no way well versed in every disability/disorder, however i will attempt to do basic research for the request)

I am also comfortable with writing platonic requests and found family dynamics! I am not limiting myself and you guys to romantic stuff!

reader abstracting, while this may seem contradictory to some of the things in my will not write segment I have written about grief and loss before and I don't think it fully fits the category of what I won't write + death in general, so it shall get a pass

really there isnt much i will turn down that comes to mind, if something is breaching a line or making me uncomfortable i will let you know

reader inserts, ocs, and the like are all welcome here! im not too confident with oc x character stuff due to the simple fact that i fear i may interpret your oc wrong but i am still willing to try!

WILL NOT WRITE:

general problematic stuff is an immediate no

^so like, straight up abuse and abuse adjacent topics since as far as Im aware all the characters in TADC are adults (if I have that wrong please please correct me!!)

i am also iffy on yandere requests, this one is more on a case by case basis so please be sure to specify the intensity of it, since that will really be a make or break for whether or not if the request is accepted

NSFW, this blog is for the most part SFW. I occasionally vague certain aspects, however nothing is ever explicit. That's how far I'm willing to go with these things and I want to keep it that way

Full fledged fanfics; a lot of my scenarios/imagines tend to border on that just on a much shorter scale and in a slightly different format, but I am not totally confident in my ability to write proper fics :(

no graphic depictions of gore or self harm, and i ask that you keep that out of my inbox in general. topics like SH are allowed, however covering requests for the act of it as its happening is an automatic no (IE if you ask me to walk in on a character walking in during an act of self harm), the same applies to suicide

ADDITIONAL NOTES:

i have a nasty habit of not proofreading my stuff, so grammar and spelling mistakes are bound to happen unfortunately. this tends to be a worse issue when im posting on mobile (which i am doing less and less since i like typing on a keyboard more)

^ on top of that i struggle with writing, english is my first language but i have a hard time getting stuff out right on top of having dyslexia so please be patient

i typically tend to respond to requests fairly fast, typically within a day or two, though i do have some periods where it may take longer. (possible) same day delivery YAHOO!!

back to a forewarning, i have a habit of rambling and adding additional ideas and concepts into a request though for the most part i think i remain on topic (that just means you get a little extra content for your request ueueue)

[diamondstripe1]

How To Make A Dreamcore Story

(if you recognize this- yes, this is copy-pasted from my tiktok. same username on both platforms!! <3)

So i’ve been hyperfixating on dreamcore lately, BUT i noticed some of the stories are a bit clunky, so i wanted to provide tips based on both my experience with writing, and my experience with dreamcore as an aesthetic!! <3

DISCLAIMER!! Please do not harass any dreamcore story creators, even if the writing’s iffy- after all, they’re most likely young, and this may be their first time working on a project of that size. This is not to shame those creators, but to help steer them in the right direction!! :D 

Common tropes i’ve noticed

The school format

I noticed most dreamcore stories have the same format. The viewer heads to school, random student approaches, speedruns their introduction, then warns the viewer of an entity/other student. This isn’t exactly bad- there’s quite a lot of room to work with!- but after literal years of being repeated over and over again, if you don’t do anything with it, it can get pretty stale.

2. The playroom format

This format is a little less common, but it’s still present- possibly owed to that one tiktok sound. Basically, a character’s at an indoor playground/some other kid-friendly place, but then they somehow get stuck for years on end. Again, not bad (a lot more creative than the school format, i’ll admit), but again-again, it’s been repeated and repeated with no sense of subversion or general flavor. Keeping that up, it’ll get bland.

3. The mother-centric format

Speaks in the name- more popular than the playroom format, but less popular than the school format. The viewer unexplainably encounters a character proclaiming to be the viewer’s mother, and keeps them in her house. Other characters say to beware of mother, mother goes apeshit, yada yada somebody dies, the end. This format has a lot of potential (I find myself more invested than, say, the playroom or school format), but you have to be careful, because if you don’t use that potential, it’ll simply be lost in a barren of so many other mother-centric stories.

4. Object head characters

Moving away from story formats, since those are THE most prevalent. Now okay, object head characters aren’t exactly bad- i love those guys! But there are a *lot*- from my experience, it’s mostly eyes and tv heads. Of course, eye heads and tv heads aren’t bad! They’re just extremely common, and thus, many people will get tired of it.

5. Just a human world with distorted people

This one’s more of a personal pet peeve of mine than an actual trope, but since it’s very common, I figured I'd mention it. Now, if you don’t know where to start in terms of worldbuilding, that’s okay! We’ll get to that in a bit. But like- this is meant to be otherworldly, is it not? So why is everything so *human*? Now, you do have a writing opportunity with that- maybe it’s meant to look normal early on, and the non-human aspects creep through as the story progresses. But a lot of the time, it’s laziness. And it’s okay to be lazy, but there are plenty of ways to spice up the world your setting is in!

6. Cookie-cutter personalities

Again, more of poor writing than an actual trope, but it’s still common, so it’s worth talking about. There’s usually three character archetypes within dreamcore stories- ‘vaguely benevolent’, a generically nice character that’s usually just an introduction/worldbuilding crutch and not much else, ‘one-note bully’, a character with little personality beyond harassing people (that is very commonly seen in the school format), and ‘homicidal creature’, the entity/other student that the vaguely benevolent character warns about, sometimes going hand-in-hand with the one note bully. None of these are inherently bad, and they’re great as a starting point, but they are bland, if you can’t expand upon them.

Now that’s out of the way, let’s move onto our points- writing tips, character tips, and story tips. While the first two are good for any sort of story, the last one is more dreamcore-centric, in my opinion.

 Let’s start with a few writing tips!

Take your time. I know it’s tempting to jump into the meat of your story, but if you do without buildup, it’s gonna give your viewers whiplash- basically, avoid speedrunning. Here’s an example on what to do- if you’re going with the school format, have the viewer meet the character, have the character say their name/pronouns/whatever, have them find out yall are in the same first class, then walk to class together. Have the two get to know each other, through hobbies and quirks and whatnot, then once you reach the class, THEN you can share about the entity/other student. Nothing oscar-worthy, but at least you’ll be easing the viewer into the story, rather than infodumping all at once. 

Show, don’t tell. Pretty similar to the first point, but equally as important! Rather than spoon feeding all the worldly info to the viewer, have them discover it themself! For example, don’t just say “hey there’s acid rain and eyes that watch your every move and teeth as money”- have an event where the viewer steps outside, and is baffled to learn there’s acid rain. Have an event where they see eyes on the wall staring into their soul, and bail from the area. Have an event where they head to a store, and is disgusted when they find out the cashier only accepts teeth. This way, the viewer will feel more immersed into your world, and it’s a good opportunity to explore different places!

Please, god, learn grammar. Of course, you may be young, or maybe english isn’t your first language- and that’s okay! This isn’t meant to be a dig against you. But poor grammar can easily pull the viewer from the story, and if you want viewers, you gotta keep them hooked! Stiffness of the wording isn’t (usually) the problem here, it’s often punctuation, spelling, and capitalization- see the difference between these two sentences; “What are you doing here? You shouldn’t have come here.” “what ru doing here, u shouldnt have come hear”

Be subtle! Pretty much just an add-on to the ‘show, don’t tell’ bit. For example, if you’re making a twist villain, you don’t want them to be screaming in the viewer’s face and chopping people right in front of them, because then nobody will be surprised. Instead, maybe they say something about how ‘everyone always leaves them’, or they have something negative to say about literally every other character. There’s still a glimmer of mistrust, but it’s not too obvious, so you’re able to take the viewer by surprise.

I think that’s it? My other points fall into other categories- speaking of which… Character tips!!

Get creative! I know, it’s tempting to go the standard “eyeball/tv head face” route, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But if you explore beyond that realm, it’ll make you stand out, even if just a little bit! If you’re going the object head route, then I recommend putting some meaning behind the objects you choose, since that can add to your storytelling. For example, if your character is a husk of the person they once were, then maybe you could use a broken vase, or an animal skull. It can also work as foreshadowing! If your character is a ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’ type, you can make them a literal sheep, or some other 'helpless' prey animal. Hell, you can look to symbolism specifically found in dreams- for a hopeless romantic character, you could use a red tulip, since in dreams, they represent intense passion and love. Of course, I recommend exploring outside the object people- are there shadow people? Dolls? What are the limits for you? Don’t be afraid to explore what you can do with your characters, because whatever you decide, it’ll make your story flourish.

Naming! I noticed people either name their dreamcore characters human-y names, or they’re named after the thing they are. Neither of this is bad, but you can explore a bit! Going back to the object heads, since that’s a lot of people’s comfort zones- let’s say you got a tooth head character. Rather than naming them Tooth or John, you can explore teeth-related name options- Canine, Veneer, Cavity, Fang, whatever. Nothing groundbreaking, but still, a bit of flavor’s appreciated. It can hint into your character’s personality, too! With Veneer, a veneer’s a custom shell that fits over the surface of a tooth, meant to improve their appearance. Maybe *your* Veneer’s a superficial bootlicker that boosts up and covers for the main antagonist of the story. As for another example, with Canine… Well, ‘canine poetry’ is all I'm gonna say.

Give their personalities flavor! Not everyone can be the three ‘vaguely benevolent’, ‘one-note bully’, or ‘homicidal creature’ archetypes. What are their hobbies? Little quirks and mannerisms? What is their trauma, if they have any? What is the reason to feel a certain way about a character? If you don’t know these things right away, that’s okay! Take some time to get to know your characters. What are your characters’ fatal flaws? Do your malevolent characters have any sort of redeeming qualities? How do your characters grow or regress throughout the story? Don’t be afraid to make your characters morally gray- it’ll only make them more engaging! (With careful writing, of course.)

Making the actual character. Now, picsart is a very popular tool, and it’s great for building a concept for how you want your character to look- and it’s perfectly fine to use that as your final, lots of people do! But my advice? I think you should try your hand at art. I know this sounds scary, but think about it! Not only will your story have a more personal touch, but it will also be a lot more expressive! If you don’t wanna draw them yourself, that’s okay- you can commission someone to draw the characters for you, or if someone’s willing to do it for free, take that chance!

Now, onto the meat of this guide- STORY TIPS!

Research dreamcore as an aesthetic. To put into simple terms- dreamcore is an aesthetic based heavily on dreams, nightmares, and nostalgia for something that never happened, or existed. Many people like to interpret this as pastel or bright imagery, mushrooms, eyes, vague text, trauma, comfort, etc etc. Of course, how you see dreamcore will influence how you create your dreamcore story, as there’s a lot of freedom in an individual’s dreams. This means you can stick to the common “mushrooms with eyes” formula (nothing wrong with that!), or you can go all out based on what you personally see in a dream, or nightmare.

Plot it out. It’s easy to just make stuff up as you go along- and while you can do that, you’re a lot more likely to create occasional plot holes, and general inconsistency. Take a moment to figure out what you want, even if it’s just a vague idea- beginning, middle, and end plot points may seem basic, but trust me, they’re essential to a coherent storyline. Your idea doesn’t have to be finalized, but you still need an *idea*, you know?

WORLDBUILDING. I can not stress this enough- please build on your world, make it your own. If you can’t think of any way to expand on it, let me ask some questions! Where is your main setting? What is the currency? How does time work- is it incoherent, like in actual dreams? What do living things outside of your ‘people’ look like, such as animals and plants? Are there common superstitions? Gods? What do the ‘people’ eat? What are the unspoken and spoken rules of this world? Build up as you go- you don’t have to figure everything out at once.

Get inspiration from dreams. The next few tips are gonna be “get inspiration”-esque, so buckle up. What are particular dreams of yours, or someone else's? What can you build around them? Maybe if there’s multiple, you can combine them in some way. On this topic, you can build on the inherent ‘quirks’ of dreams- for example, in dreams, time and wording are incoherent. Maybe upon exploring their world, the viewer may happen to find a clock whose hands spin at the speed of light. Or maybe while trying to uncover some sort of secret, they open some old book, only to find that the words change every second. Other dream quirks are ai-worthy hands, your reflection in mirrors never matching the actual you, flight, etc.

Get inspiration from various media. Personally, I recommend looking at analog horror for ideas- while analog horror and dreamcore are not the same thing, they do often have similar elements, which could be fun if properly utilized. Don’t copy/paste, obviously, but look towards it if you need an extra push. Another option can be looking at songs- spotify’s full of dreamcore playlists, if you don’t know where to start, though be warned, it can get a bit repetitive. Look at specific lyrics, or just the tone of the song- see how that makes you feel, and center your story around those lyrics or feelings. Yet another one is combining with another aesthetic- you can look at lovecore, cottagecore, gothic, etc. for ideas, since involving hints of other aesthetics can help build up the feel of the story that you’re trying to convey.

Get inspiration from your fears. While your dreamcore story doesn’t have to be horror (see; @/little.lizard.kisses on tiktok), dreamcore often has aspects of nightmares, which can be influenced by the things you fear. Fear of the dark? Maybe the viewer’s in a small neighborhood surrounded by an untouched, avoided forest, and the viewer goes out at night to explore it. Fear of being alone? Maybe the viewer’s in a liminal world where they’re the only person within it, and they’re desperately trying to search for someone else in this dreamscape. There’s many other fears, of course, but I encourage you to come up with your own ideas (though I’d still be happy to help!).

Music. Okay, done with the inspiration tips. Music is a good way to build up mood throughout your story, especially one like this. Though, many of the classic dreamcore songs (Hey Kids, School Rooftop, any Undertale song, etc) have been overplayed to hell and back, so it doesn’t hurt to introduce something new- here’s a few good playlists!

8. Voices. Now, of course, you could go with the computer-generated voices on free websites- classic, and less of a hassle. But unless you tinker around with it, there’s less room for expression, and of course, after years of use it gets old. So what’s the solution? Voice acting! Either do all the voices yourself, get some friends to help, or do a casting call. It’s definitely a lot harder to put together, but it leaves the story feeling authentic! Of course, you’re free to do the computer generated voices if that’s what you wish- this is just something I barely see in dreamcore content, if at all. (And besides, having voice acting isn't a fix-all, just a fun, unique thing for if you're doing a video format!!)

I think that’s it!! If you have any questions, or need any help (story ideas, constructive criticism, etc), please let me know in the notes, or just message me on discord (same as my username- diamondstripe1)!! <3

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

Hi, I became a fan and a larrie just a few years ago, so a while after the band went on "hiatus".

So I wasn't around when it all took place. But when I looked into it to inform myself and firm an opinion, I always had the impression that Harry and Louis were very much coding and WANTING the fans to know, that there was something going on. Of course I can't know their intentions, but thats what it felt like to me. So I can emphasize with the feeling of a lot of larries who felt like they needed to be loud for them.

I think all of that shifted immensely now, but it always sounds a bit iffy to me, when people blame larries for being loud.

Of course there's a lot of very questionable behaviour, but back in the day I totally get that they felt like they do it fir them.

I'm not sure, I got across what I wanted to say, but I hope you get what I mean.

I am much less sure of this than you anon. But I do think it's worth talking about a little bit.

I think using the term 'coded' is a huge and unhelpful leap. Coded implies that the intention is that a particular action is decoded. It centres the audience in a really specific way. It cuts off a lot of other options. In particular, the idea that communication can be expressive - that it can be about what people want to say - rather than centering the audience.

I'd be interested in knowing more about how you see different periods. I think I'd divide things up like this.

Up until April 2012, I don't think what we see was really about communication at all. They didn't have a good sense of what was being captured or what it would mean that things were being captured. They were young and in love and that was captured much more than anyone else. They weren't performing for an imaginary audience - in fact that's the reason we're here - was that they didn't understand the impact of their audience.

After that, while they were still in 1D, with one big exception, I think it's a great exaggeration to say they wanted fans to know. Both Harry and Louis took acts that were probably expressing their sexuality - but I think that was probably about them and where they were at at the time - not about the audience.

The one exception is the Bears - and while I've been arguing for years that they were more expressive than encoded - continuing to put the picture of the drag queen up until she was identified - does very much suggest the audience was the point. Although that doesn't mean it was the point for them (assuming they were involved) - we've always known there had to be other people involved with the bears. So just because the audience was important to some people involved, doesn't mean it was important for Harry and Louis.

Then if we take our next periodisation as from the end of the band to say towards the end of 2021. You do get occasional engaging with queer culture from Louis and increasing engagement with queer culture from Harry. I think that's all expressive - I don't think any of it was about conveying message specifically all to fans. I also don't think there was much about their relationship at all. And while we can make interpretations of songs - I really don't think they were coded - I think that's us doing the work.

Then finally you've got the end of 2021 till now - where there's even less. I think that's mostly about them being less expressive - although it may be also actively hiding. There are some questions in all this (I find Louis covering a song where the first word is Larry mystifying whatever is going on). But they're just that - questions.

So yeah, the way I see it is they have been expressive sometimes, but there's very little coding.

[stedefxckingbonnet]

requests info/intro!

hi, everyone!

i thought i'd take a quick second to introduce myself and to also formally open up requests. i'm already working on a few things, but requests really do always help and feel free to submit them at any point--but, we'll get to all of that in a moment!

my name is lavinia, and i am a uni student studying both theatre (dramaturgy specifically) and creative writing! i love to sing, act, write (obviously haha), read (i am a huge fan of classic literature, as well as donna tartt, mona awad, sally rooney, elif bautman, and ottessa moshfegh's works), go to concerts, go to the movies, style/design clothing, paint, collect records/cds, and so much more! this barely scratches the surface really but, if any of you share these interests, always feel free to reach out!

anyhow, as i said, i will officially be opening requests, and at the moment here is the media and the characters i will write for:

Our Flag Means Death

Izzy Hands (my BELOVED)

Ed Teach

Stede Bonnet

Lucius Spriggs

Jim Jimenez

Oluwande

Mary Bonnet

(more available upon request! these were just sort of my first instincts.)

Gilmore Girls

honestly, i'm pretty open to anything unless it's dean. just request and i'll see what i can do!

Gossip Girl

Blair Waldorf

Serena Van der Woodsen

Dan Humphrey

Nate Archibald

Chuck Bass (like sometimes)

Rufus Humphrey

more available upon request.

The Fosters/The Good Trouble

Callie Adams Foster

Mariana Adams Foster

Brandon Foster

Jamie Hunter

Gael Martinez

Dennis Cooper

Malika Williams

more available upon request.

Select Wes Anderson and Tim Burton characters. just ask!

Enola Holmes

Enola Holmes

Tewkesbury

Sherlock Holmes

Little Women (2019)

Jo March

Amy March

Beth March

Meg March

Laurie

Friedrich Bhaer

Star Wars

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Anakin Skywalker

Padmé Amidala

Luke Skywalker

Han Solo

Leia Organa

Kylo Ren

Finn

Poe Dameron

Ahsoka Tano

more available upon request!

Pride & Prejudice (2005)

Basically me just saying I'll write Mr. Darcy. but more characters available upon request, of course.

Community

Abed Nadir

Troy Barnes

Annie Edison

Jeff and Britta I'm a little iffy on but with the right request, maybe. don't hesitate to ask!

The OC

Seth Cohen

Ryan Atwood

Summer Roberts

Marissa Cooper

The Umbrella Academy

Klaus

Viktor

Ben

Five

Diego

Allison

Luther is like, not preferred for me but if you feel strongly about him and have a good request, i’ll consider it but don’t get your hopes up too high!

Once Upon a Time

Emma Swan

Regina Mills

Killian Jones

Neal Cassidy

August Booth

Jefferson (The Mad Hatter)

Mulan

Ruby Lucas (Red Riding Hood)

Belle French

Mary Margaret Blanchard (Snow White)

David Nolan (Prince Charming)

Peter Pan

Robin Hood

Any others, feel free to ask! I know I left Mr. Gold (Rumple) off, but that's only because it depends with each request. Also, please specify if you want it to take place in Storybrooke pre or post curse, or in The Enchanted Forest.

Merlin

Merlin

Arthur

Gwen

Morgana

Nimueh

Lancelot

any others, feel free to ask. i am just starting S2, keep that in mind.

The Holdovers

Angus Tully

Dead Poets Society

Todd Anderson

Neil Perry

Knox Overstreet

Charlie Dalton

Steven Meeks

Love Lies Bleeding

Lou Langston

Jackie Cleaver

i'll just start there for now, as honestly it's been a bit since i've written an x reader and i don't want to overwhelm myself much! but please, feel free to request at any time! I will update this frequently, as I am always either getting into new things or remembering things I already love. I am mostly dedicated to OFMD right now, but you may also leave requests for other fandoms and I will keep them on file, or who knows, perhaps even get to them sooner than you may imagine! Have a wonderful day (or night!), and don't forget to request!

yours truly,

lavinia

me filing through all of your requests (hopefully!)

[spruzu]

SONIC ADVENTURE TWO TALK!!!

SO I JUST FINISHED THE GAME AND OH MY GOD!!! I CRIED, I SCREAMED, I WAS SMILING SO HARD, I WAS HYPERVENTILATING AHH! I'm going to talk about it now here you go!

Thoughts about controls: I want to get my negatives out the way first before i talk about all the positives about this game. The main thing that i didn't like where the controls. Now don't get me wrong this is being REALLY nit-picky because most of the game i was completely fine with fighting and moving but sometimes it was really iffy. For example, Sonics homing attack was sometimes really janky. It would make you fall after pressing the homing attack half a second too slow which was what got me out half of the time with the Sonic stages. With Rouge, it would just send me flying which did genuinely make me laugh sometimes but there were other times where i got annoyed over it because i was close to finishing the stage. I don't have any criticism for Tails and Eggman's controls because they were the easiest out of all the stages overall. I don't have much for Knuckles either as he is very similar to Rouge. There was another thing that comes with the controls however which is the camera angle. If you mashed the attack button it would sometimes get really confused and just fly you about the place, making you camera angle stuck in specific way where you can't see the character (having a platform or a wall in the way of your vision/the character) then ending up dying. One thing i can say is that this happened mostly in boss fights and less in stages however, in the last stage with Eggman, i was hovering then managed to let go for a second, making the platform near me fill my screen then i couldn't see ending up in me falling. I don't have much to say other than that, again this is me being really nit-picky and it didn't bother me much until i was trying to actually get through something quickly or was close to finshing a stage.

The story: OH MY GOD! THIS👏 WAS👏 AMAZING👏!! There was no part of it that i was bored by or i didn't enjoy seeing. I was so excited every time i got a cut scene after a stage. The ending was incredible to. I was sat there crying doing the Biolizard, Super Sonic and Super Shadow boss fight. Watching that last cutscene was an experience that will stick with me forever. Watching Sonic and Shadow go super was adrenaline rushing it was so COOL! And the end credits, JESUS... i was BALLING. ''Sayonara Shadow the hedgehog'' HE DID FUCKING NOT. HE. DID. NOT. I screamed when he said that no joke. The end credits where so sweet to, the music was so nice. Honestly the ending was so worth it i'm So glad i played this game. I can see why people say this is one of THE BEST Sonic games especially counting the ending and sound track.

End boss fight: Now, with the Shadow Biolizard boss fight, that crap took me SO. MANY. TRIES. It took me at least 40 mins and a billion (joking) tries to get past that boss but there was no part of it that made me angry! It was a boss fight that made you learn what the bosses attacks and moves were along the way which is something i adore. Boss fights like that always have a special place in my heart. And the Super Sonic and Super Shadow boss fight, there is no bad part to it. It was such a nice boss fight to have finish off the game. Right after a hard-ish boss then throwing in an incredible song with two amazing characters and an easy boss!!! AH AMAZING!!!

Overall thoughts: I'm going to stop myself here because i know i could go on for ages talking about this. Overall, this is defiantly my favourite Sonic game. Its my first proper Sonic game that i have played (that isn't tmosth and 2012 Olympic games) and my GOD was it a good way to start of my intro to Sonic gameplay. You BET i'm ordering Sonic Unleashed soon so i can play that. But for any new sonic fans, i'd really recommend playing sa2 as one of your first games because its a really good way to get into Sonic and you don't need too much information/lore about other characters to understand the story line!

This game was incredible, i am going to try to 100% it... over the span of a reeeeaaaallllly long time.

[kitts-mechanix]

@jetravenex I hope you don't mind sharing this here, I just didn't want to leave a looooooooooooooong reply on an already long post so I'm going to put my thoughts here:

You are right, everything does have a message/something to be drawn, but it's not necessarily activism. I've noticed a lot of people tend to use those words interchangeably (and looking at my tags again I realise I didn't specify that, my bad. I had a long work day and am tired, so sorry!)

To rephrase, my issue isn't people drawing messages, it's when they INSIST every form is media is some kind of activism. And sure, there's definitely such media out there, but unless the creators come forward and confirm it, I don't like it when people insist something is "political" or "activism". Where is the line of "this is up to interpretation" and "this is straight up propaganda"?

The relatable thing, though, is where I get a bit iffy, because my issue with a lot of modern writing is they try to make the characters too relatable, i.e. one-dimensional and pushed around by the plot. Now I'm not saying they are ALL like this, because I think good character should be one YOU can relate to without the character being 100% exactly LIKE YOU, if that makes any sense (I relate to Cruz from Cars 3 despite not being Hispanic or a car). I mean, I was almost a little scared by how much I related to G1 Starscream in OG Transformers, and even asked myself "why do you like him so much, he's clearly a narcissistic character and you've dealt with narcissistic abuse". Then I realised it was because Starscream went through abuse similar to what I experienced, just more physical. That was how I could relate and sympathise with him--despite him being a fictional cartoon robot who turns into a jet.

I feel some writers make relatable characters as flat as possible so it's easier for people to see themselves in a character by not giving the them a strong base. A good character is someone the audience can relate to without being exactly like them. Hence how I related to both D16 and Orion Pax in Transformers One.

That being said, I don't think all characters need to be relatable, sympathetic or even likeable. What I care about personally is if the character is interesting or engaging. I don't have to relate to a character to enjoy the movie. I mean, I don't relate to Finn McMissile from Cars 2 or KITT from Knight Rider, but I still love them immensely.

(I realise I probably just over-analysed that and I'm terribly sorry).

But as I said before, I think one of the reasons I was so drawn towards Transformers when I finally got into it, was because the common theme across all the generations was a criticism of a corrupt system, war themes, internal battles, etc. and it was crazy how much that spoke to me, as someone living in a place with lots of political unrest and someone who deals with inner demons. (I could go into a whole essay about this).

There are many cases where people will use a medium to get their opinions through, and it's obvious they're trying to push a certain agenda (those adult cartoons like South Park come to mind) and there may be subtle themes/biases in other media, but I guess what I'm trying to say is don't make a mountain out of a molehill. Like when people jump to the assumption that Cars 2 was anti-alternative fuel/EVs, or Transformers One was some giant US election warning. I often wonder if Glen A Larson, who created Knight Rider, was very pro-AI vehicles/a major critic of the police force and government. And I have no doubt all three of those I mentioned have subtle biases from their human creators: but they are not political allegories/propaganda. Sure, there's a message to be drawn from each one, but sometimes I feel people cling too hard to that message (or what they drew from it personally) and try to blow it out of proportion.

JRR Tolkien and CS Lewis were both devout Christians, and they definitely translated their beliefs into their works (Lewis more so, because The Chronicles of Narnia is essentially an allegory to the Bible, however it wasn't in a preaching way: it was a story Christians and non-Christians could enjoy, appreciate and draw something from. He didn't write it convert people; it was meant to be a story to draw people in, something they could draw a meaning from, religious or not). But their works were not religious propaganda. Both stories have meanings that anyone can draw from.

I know I always say people need to stop reading into things so deeply, but the truth is, I do that too. Like when I kept pulling all these deep messages out of G1 Transformers episodes even when I kept telling myself "lady, it's an 80s cartoon, you're projecting way too much" yet I was drawing SO MANY conclusions and life lessons out of it.

It's kind of like what you said about how sometimes those meanings aren't necessarily intentional, but it's what people draw. And that's the beauty of storytelling and art; seeing what other people draw from that.

Same goes with character interpretation. There's something so beautiful and personal in that. Filling in the spaces with how you see them, often drawn from our own experiences.

Now as for what the OOP said (and I thank you for getting me the full text because I might have been looking at it out of context):

It is true that fandoms have always been a place where people can make hot/controversial takes with little to no policing. Slash shipping, for example, is something that's been around pretty much since I first started reading and writing fanfics. Go back to the first Cars stories published on FFN in 2006, it's 50% slash. Now for stuff like Star Trek, I can understand where people might draw political/activist themes from it since it did push boundaries for its time. I'm personally not sure why people draw so many slash ships from media like Cars, Transformers or Hetalia (excluding the fact the majority of their characters are male), but I can respect the fact that maybe there was something there that spoke to them, and just not to me.

But at the end of the day, I realise that you have to curate your own experiences in fandom. It would be wrong for me to police others work telling them what they can and cannot draw from or make for media. I'm a library technician (certified) and I cannot stress the importance of "No Censorship" (unless it's protecting minors from accessing age-inappropriate content)

The last part about banned books was beautifully said, and it actually brings me back to something I see everywhere: the "Fiction Affects Reality/Fiction Does Not Affect Reality" debate.

No, fiction does not directly affect reality. Writing about a dragon won't make a dragon appear in real life. But fiction can be influential, perhaps even change one's mind on something. Make people think. Dare to hold a different belief.

And that's what scares the people who want to ban books and other media.

[sweetsweetsstrawberry]

⋆˚࿔ Welcome 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

Hey guys!! I’ve been gone for a couple months now! Been in a weird place mentally, but missing tumblr a lot so I’ve come back (and found my account got Td while I was away) so here’s my new account!! ♡ ♡

A little about myself┊͙ ˘͈ᵕ˘͈

I am 22 years old, from Australia! I’m currently unemployed but studying full time at university doing a dual bachelors degree in psychology + counselling! I love also reading, nature, and the gym! I go camping a lot, I love the beach so so much, but also hiking to water walls and through the bush! I really try to be a positive person and try my best to be kind to myself, but I do struggle with some mental health problems such as anxiety, and my €d. I have a cat and her name is Ivy, I’m obsessed with her she’s so cute and cuddly and sweet (I might post about her a bit!)

Tw for my account ༊*·˚

- I mainly have this new account as an outlet (rant account). In the past I’ve posted f00d diaries, and my rules, and tips but I’m going to try and shy away from doing that on this account!

- I will post rants about my anxiety

- I will speak of f00d issues, di3t, gym, tracking macros, tracking c4lories, and body image (I will attempt to not post numbers but sometimes I may! And if I do, there will be a tw dedicated to it!

- There may be mention of other mental health struggles such as depression as well

I do not promote €d’s at all!! But it is something I struggle with so those themes may come up a lot on this account! I am here for anyone seeking help, my dm’s are open!

As I am a fully grown adult I would really appreciate it if minors DNI and seek help from those you trust if you can ♡

I am iffy on having my stats up but I will just add them to this introduction post for now (might remove later!) so tw stats below the cut

.❀。My stats ❀°。

Hw (highest I’ve ever gotten): 68kg (149.6 lbs)

Sw (from my most recent hw/ the current relapse): 60kg (132 lbs)

Lw (past): 42kg (92.4 lbs)

Cw: 50kg (110 lbs)

I was 47kg last time I was on this app, so yes I have gained a bit, but alas

I don’t currently have a certain gw! Usually it would be 40-45kg (88-99 lbs) but I am actively trying to build up muscle at this current phase in my life, so I guess maintenance is my current goal for now! (Wanting to lose f4t still but gain muscle and see what happens - always just lost f4t but still looked f4t to me so I wanna see if building muscle will give me the look I have been chasing my entire existence lol)

I’m more obsessing over macros at the moment, my rules for myself are heavily macro based rather than c4ls! Though, never consuming over my maintenance c4ls is important to me too, so I’ll post a nightly update on whether I was in a deficit or surplus from my c4l maintenance :))

Thank you for reading ♡ ̆̈༝༚༝༚

[thepolyamorouspolymath]

Ok, so I may have buried the lead there on my life as to why no one has heard from me in forever -- first thing is because my every weekend is being spent with the guy that every guy I've ever gushed about pretended to be. I'm going to call him Bard, bc he will LOVE that. Yes, this guy is great enough I am even giving him a loving handle here.

It's not even like big huge shit -- he's just honest, and reassuring, and considerate, and respects me, and he listens and he coddles me on the shit that's not really important to make me feel secure while standing up to me on the shit that is to find a compromise (like his schedule sucks, and his two days off he hosts DND every other week and has band practice the other, and I'm like there's no time for me, just fitting me in -- didn't drop either but we agreed to pause them for 6 weeks to give us time to spend together to make me feel secure, and then I could come with or hang out in the other room if I chose, and non DND weekends or sometimes Saturdays can be spent at my place, not always his. Like he wants us both to have our lives but he gets I'm scarred and so willing to show me first -- with a clock -- that I matter by giving me a window to settle in). He met my older kids and brought Oldest a birthday present, and Boy Thing had been giving shit about the last guy who wanted to impress him sent a fruit basket. This adorable man had no clue what goes in a fruit basket (his first thought were melons) or what fruit baskets were so he bought the apples and oranges and kiwis and put them in a medium laundry basket. Boy Thing straight up laughed out loud at the sight, it was perfect. Every time he left my room, he'd be gone like at least half an hour -- the bathroom is like a 90 second walk max -- bc he and Oldest would get chatting about gaming.

He tells me I'm sexy and I'm beautiful but he also compliments things like how I make him feel understood, how I communicate. He knows I'm perfectly capable of defending myself if insulted or offended but also doesn't think I should ever have to.

And yes, the sex is fantastic and in a way that's fucking revelatory. He tries my kinks even if he's internally a bit iffy on the idea, bc he trusts its OK if he stops as soon as he doesn't like something (thankfully he's liked them all so far, initiating them at times now.) I had to red bc of something he said while I was going down on him, after trying to convince myself I was overreacting (bc honestly it was nothing bad, and would normally not have even fucking blipped my radar) and when I did, he immediately dropped out of the scene and sex and into taking care of me and what was it that triggered me and what came up and not only did I not get any pressure but not even any guilt -- like I knew he meant every word that all he cared about was me. I can initiate with him without feeling paralyzing fear of rejection bc there's zero mind games, zero manipulations.

The first weekend, we hadn't decided to spend the whole weekend together -- we were just going on a bookstore. We spent it all in bed, but not just fucking, we were talking. And the fucking? He couldn't cum. Even had a tough time staying hard. And for the first time in my life it was OK. Normally a guy can't, and it fucks with my insecurities so much that like no, I don't even want to be there. But instead we did everything we could and both reassured the other that it was fantastic -- bc it truly was -- and not an issue. Problem resolved but he's said like he wouldn't even think to mention orgasms if anyone asked him about that weekend that it was like 4 days of the best sex of his life, like how it can be hard to cum while rolling but the sex is amazing.

After I red'd out during the first time I was giving him head (it's a thing for him, but I'd been refusing bc he'd eaten asparagus and I warned him every such occasion would be followed by at least 5 days before his dick came in contact with my mouth again bc it makes semen taste just the worst). Going another round later in a roleplaying scene, he broke character a bit to ask about head, I said I didn't want to risk another round of sex derailed bc I got triggered since it'd just been earlier that day, he's like yeah totally get that, and both back into character and having a blast. I'm completely comfortable naked around him even if my legs have stubble, but in a sexy way, and never ever boring!

He's a musician, guitarist and bassist. He's a nerd. I recommended a book, and he immediately was going to buy a copy and I offered to loan him mine (a fave book of mine) and he has been slowly but diligently reading it and says it's better bc it's my copy and looking at it's broken to shit spine and pages that have been dog eared a million times just makes him love it more bc I love it. He wants me to come to band practice (if I can behave lol) and to join the party at dnd (if I can behave lol -- to be fair, those are my caveats, not his) but also wants to paint with me and take pottery class with me, and write a metal track that can be belly danced to (bc metal is very masculine in the tantra vibe sense, not the gender roles way, while belly dancing is pure divine feminine -- never meant to seduce, it was by women for women -- and I think that juxtaposition would be fucking amazing if we get it right) and likes hanging out with my kids (Oldest made him a dice set) and respects my relationship with B, and tells all his friends about me and wants me to meet everyone and is more worried that I like them than that they like me. He makes terrible jokes that crack me up. He sits through my storms with me. He understands that I push people away and am the poster child for trust issues and hangs through all my bullshit.

He would never want to hurt me, like truly, but also never lies to me to spare me.

We will literally spend hours past when he should be in bed for work on the phone, to the point that I, Little Miss Time is a Construct, have started watching the clock for time so he can get his sleep and I don't resent it bc he's so great about setting the boundary of he wants to stay up with me but has to sleep or will be late for work, and when we go over never blames me or resents me, but owns that he chose to do so bc he was loving it.

Yeah, I might be more than a little gone over him.

[freyjas-light]

How do you communicate with your deities in meditation? I’ve tried but sometimes I wonder what’s them and what’s my imagination. I’m in my first year of deity worship so I’m still learning how to communicate

I went through the exact same thoughts as you when I started. I wondered if I was crazy for even attempting communicating with deities at all. I promise you that learning discernment does get easier over time, but I will also say that communicating through meditation is a skill and requires practice and not something you can jump immediately back into if you've set it down for a couple months (like yours truly can be bad about when life gets crazy)

Now I should start by pointing out that when I say "meditate" it's more of a practice in visualization. I can't clear my mind while meditating, it doesn't work for me. With that said, what I mention in this post might not work for you! Try different combinations, leave things out, whatever you know would be best for your style of "meditation".

So typically when I first sit down for my meditation session I set my intentions. I do this by simply stating in my mind who I would like to talk to, or what question I am trying to get an answer to, or just that I want to hang out with whoever is around.

I then start the process of relaxing and getting into the visualization/meditative state. I let all my thoughts flow, not focusing on any of them in particular. If I find myself focusing, I'll take a deep breath and try to relax back into this state of flow. I also will typically put on some ambient music to help get me in the right mood.

Now this is debatably the hardest part, and one you personally might not need. I have formed what I call a "waiting room" in my mind. It's a place I go that helps remind me to not focus on anything in particular, and is where I typically "meet" my gods. My "waiting room" is a very simple space, not much to conjure up, easy enough to come back to if I start to wander. It's more important that the space you choose or find is the same every time, that way you can get into the correct headspace quicker.

While in my waiting room, this is when I start opening up my mind to whatever messages I may receive. Sometimes this comes as visuals, sometimes this comes as an inner voice that seems to resonate from a different part of my brain. At this time I don't try to figure out what might be me and what might be my deity, I just let it all come in, filter what I need to to stay in the correct headspace, and ask any clarifying questions in my head if I need it.

Once I have received what I needed (I typically can tell because the energy shifts and the messages either stop, slow down, or I can start to tell my own thoughts are overpowering), I will write down anything important that I gathered. I will then take a moment to either pull runes or tarot to check if what I saw/heard was accurate.

When starting out, things can feel iffy on if the messages you received were correct or even there at all. But the more you practice, the better your intuition in these situations will get. I also feel that by doing these types of visualizations/meditations, I became more aware of being able to sense the changes of energies around me, particularly when one of my deities decides to show up.

I hope this guide helps a little! Please let me know if you need clarification on anything 💕

~Keegs

[spockandawe]

Hello, hi, sorry to bother you. Can I ask you a few questions about edge marbling? Cause I'm wanting to do a suminagashiarble on the edges of a book I'm doing and also it sounds terrifying. What I understand so far is that you get two boards and two c clamps, clamp the shit out of the edge of your book, and then dip. Do I round the book before I dip the fore edge? Will clamping the shit out of it prevent water damage? Do I have to dip relatively quickly? Does speed matter?

Thank you for your time

No problem at all!!!! So, disclaimer up front that I am just ad-libbing wildly based on vibes and instincts, and my instincts often skew in the direction of shortcuts and forgetting steps. So I'm not the MOST reliable resource, if something I say sounds iffy to you, please go ahead and question it and test it on your own and prove me wrong! Edge marbling takes place at a point in the process where failure would be HEARTBREAKING, so take whatever precautions you feel like you need! I tested some thrifted books I didn't care about before moving to books I had made.

The rounding is a hard question. I haven't marbled any rounded books, so I'm speculating here, but as you marble, having sides that trimmed and sanded at is CRITICAL. it isn't as finicky as for like, gilding, but you don't want to get bubbles trapped under your edge because that will leave a blank space in your color. it's less obtrusive in suminagashi than other marbling styles, but still a damn shame. When I round, I usually trim the fore edge flat afterwards. I like the look, some people don't. I would definitely be willing to marble an edge like that. If you want the concave look, you'll need to marble before rounding. And that's going to be... hard, because your edges need to be as flat as possible and your spine won't be fully glued yet. You might be able to get it good enough, but I would worry about bubbles. This is something you can't really test on a thrifted book, but I would sew a blank book or something to test on before doing it for real. Maybe clamping, sanding, marbling, and drying each edge separately before proceeding? I'm not sure, sorry.

Now, overall... When I do this, speed is definitely key, but rushing isn't good either, because some of the actions do need to be precise. It's a tricky balance to walk, but I would prioritize speed myself, rather than risk the integrity of the book. If I was being REALLY careful, I would use boards cut to be the exact size of my text block so I could clamp in one go, then dunk my sides one-two-three and get it out and leave it to press and dry. I don't, I use board scraps and move them between sides of the text block as I go. To facilitate that, I use these clamps specifically for this task:

These are spring loaded nylon clamps. They ratchet down with hand pressure, and when you trigger a switch in the handle, they SPRING open. It's much faster than a nice clamp, and gives me enough pressure for this task. I'm not trying to hold the text block in place while I hammer it. I'm just trying to stop water from soaking into the text block. And if I do this right, I'll be barely touching my text block to the water anyways.

I mentioned bubbles under your text block up above, but even more than that, I try to be careful about not letting the the boards overlap the edge of the book. I sometimes let them recess by a smidge, but overhang will DEFINITRLY guarantee a space where a bubble could be trapped. I try to keep a clean flat surface nearby where I can dip an edge, unclamp, move everything to a new side, and get it all freshly clamped, aligned with the new surface. Usually I'll just need to do the reclamping process twice max before I have to reset my marbling vessel anyways, so I usually just move fast and get a corner of my table wet, and wipe it dry later.

Then, the actual dunk. I usually go with a slight rolling motion along the length of the edge, from one corner to the other. This is another chance for bubbles to escape. But I also don't want to let the book go too deep. The clamps will help with water soaking in, but you still don't want to tempt fate too badly, and you don't need DEPTH to get the ink to take. I.... forget if I'm supposed to let it linger for a moment or not, but I usually don't. I take just long enough to be sure I've gotten the whole surface of the edge. Then I lift. I also don't remember if I blot it at all, but if I do, it's just a gentle touch against paper towels to make it stop dripping so bad, then I move to clamp the next edge.

Even if you move fast, by the end, you'll notice your first edges starting to swell up and maybe ripple a bit. That's just paper reacting to water. But also, no, bad, that needs to stop asap. As soon as I'm done. I press the text block HARD. I put paper towels and such on both sides, and then I put a LOT of weight on top of it. I want to get this as flat as possible and eliminate as much swell and ripple as I can. I usually end up with a *little* left over, but I can tell because I knew how flat it was before, it's not something I'm embarrassed to put in a binding.

I hope that helps!!!! I just kind of fudged my way through the process based on one short class on suminagashi I took and what little info I could find about other types of edge marbling. It's worked well for me, and was more forgiving than I was afraid at first. But it's still nervewracking! Best of luck with your efforts, I hope some of this is useful for you!