#it's been something more like static
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#sometimes i brush against triggers and spiral completely and immediately#but more often#more recently#it's been something more like static#and unexpected and startling jolt#but not painful#not a reason to cry (usually)
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Two researchers and a granute walk into a lab
#kamen rider#kamen rider gavv#kamen rider vram#lakia amarga#lage9#nyelv stomach#kenzo suga#tokusatsu#fanart#comics#comic#artists on tumblr#what's the suga/nyelv ship tag btw? i'll add it after figuring it out#suga being so shady to everyone but nyelv who he actually have some boundary towards as research buddies means something yknow#fun fact i've been legit torn if i wrote 'a granute' or 'two granutes' bc both are funny in different ways imo#but i'm going for 'a granute' bc i feel its less confusing plus nyelv is a research buddy above all else lol#look— so far hanty is still my fav but lakia and nyelv have become a threat for the first position#lakia due to the big bro figure + fighting style props to eitoku#and nyelv mostly for every single week he delivers one new static or quote for me to use LMAO but i also like his style#'i didn't see you for a while and you grew up even more' me at anything at this point really
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Had a thought yesterday
[Clean version + bonus below]
#my art stuff#digital art#gravity falls#stanford pines#w.d. gaster#undertale#glitch#static#secret code#transparent#gaster!ford#journal 3#bright glasses#beware the man who speaks in hands#me and a friend are half-baking concepts with this#Gerson I’m coming for you next >w>#been a WHITE since I sat through drawing a character that I’m not gay over and isn’t me#I needed that lil stanley to push me through - these are difficult times#I must admit it was really nice drawing something out of lore passion reasons again though#Staring at sixer that long was contorting my face out of uncomfortable awkwardness though#I don’t like staring at the brother in law (in TWO ways) - especially when he looks so similar to MY guy#brother in law specifically cus a friend of mine who I call MY twin has latched unto him#but also cus he’s Stanley’s brother - I suppose#but the other one much more.#I needed something to look at to get a break and just smile at instead of being awkward man#yes I know the text is lopsided and messed up - I work with CSP and I was TIRED
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okay this is one of those things that i imagine people who read journal 3 a while ago already knew but i'm just reading it now so.
static when a dimension is destroyed that's fun huh :] when the cause is a dimensional rule being broken :] i wonder if the same kind of rule would apply to whatever bill did trying to show a 3d reality to a 2d world :]
#i think i already heard about the static fear being something to do with euclydia's destruction but it's fun to find something this specific#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#this is not a website dot com#journal 3#the book of bill#gravity falls#bill cipher#i could tag the fords too but this isn't really about them#i wonder if bill only escaped because he was already in a way a part of the third dimensional world#which means no one else could have been saved. but that's getting into even more just speculation#who knows there was also fire and blood and. mandibles maybe?#but honestly? none of those things sound like they could easily destroy an entire DIMENSION#not as easily as this#triangular stringboard
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buzzmind
#I want to get better at presenting these without erroneously cutting the form off at the edges#like. for the static to be totally contained within the boundaries of the image? rather than trail off-screen.#I know it’s a *photo of a screen* but I do not want it to look like a photo of a *screen*#or rather. I do not want it to only look like a screen. I’m so fond of the actual pattern found in the arrangement of the phosphor#but#it needs to look somehow more real than that. projected outwards#or onto something? projection mapping has been in my orbit but I have never afforded a fancy projector#aaaaa so much to learn for literally no reason that besides to sate the Itch#my art#glitch art#aesthetic#art#artwork#webcore#internetcore#glitchcore#abstract#artists on tumblr
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just watched the borderlands movie and the only good part was that krieg’s little harness thingo lowkey looked like a very skimpy little bra thing sometimes
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he needs some back support with those jugs ofc
#it wasn’t AS bad as I thought it would be#but it was not good#at all#idk why they changed so much of the story and just like Made It Worse#why did they make Tina’s dad head of atlas? why not just keep her parents killed off? why did they mischaracterise her so badly?#why was she annoying? why was she an experiment? why not use a more compelling villain than Guy Who Looks And Acts As Bland As Possible#the villain was simply. no good#I wish they used jack 😔#I also wish they didn’t do the Lilith’s mum subplot bc it was a little off??? somehow?#and Tannis and Lilith’s relationship wasn’t particularly fulfilling#claptrap was even more annoying#the jokes weren’t funny#the sfx were NOT as bad as everyone said they were I’m sorry I thought they were fine aside from a few weird shots in some chase sequences#another thing I don’t get that much was ppl hating Lilith’s hair bc it’s doesn’t look like in the games#ppl compared the wig to wigs that cosplayers use that look rly accurate and good but#u have to take into account#that it’s rly hard to stylise a live action movie to look something like boarderlands and most cosplays are made to look good statically#things that look good in cosplay and in the game will not look good in a live action action sequences#like if u gave her a cosplay wig it would look great and accurate but it also would be completely rigged in the wind and would not move#like real hair#which would probably be incredibly jarring to see in a live action film especially with all the action#was the hair great? no. I still think it could’ve been vastly improved on while remaining realistic for a live action movie#but I think some people hold it to unrealistic standards in their criticisms or whatever#also costumes have to be actually movable and breathable bc REAL people are shooting REAL scenes and doing stunts and shit in them#but. yeah. the costumes could definitely have had some improvement#I think that if u wanted to make a borderlands film that was accurate to the design of the characters it would be easier to do it animated#and the writing?#we do not speak about the writing good lord#borderlands movie#borderlands
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can i ask.how u guys practice ur creativity <3 how u practice ur imagination or like.. how u experiment with ur art, how u come to ideas and how u develop them.<3 pretty please <3
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#smthing i have always struggled w.is feeling like i can only draw things that r handed 2 me.#as in.an idea or concept that already exists#chara or conflict that already exists.Scene that alr exists.#and i think it can be soo limiting bc when i have that sort of creative desire but nothing 2 reflect off of it#i feel like im unable to do anything/get anywhere bc im unable to do that mental legwork myself ykwim#like comic artists r SOOO JAW DROP INSPIRING TO MEE bc not only are u envisioning ur own sequences/situations#but u are able to imagine even the most MUNDANE interactions within those scenarios u know#like the transitory panels and the quiet moments and the every day stillness#and i feel like.its not even a poor attempt on my behalf its like.i cant Even attempt it.like my brain is soo empty#and soo static and noiseless that i am like gauhh......#i can practice lines all day long and practice colors and practice anatomy or Whatever bc its something concrete#and its in front of me and i can pry apart the physical technicalities until i understand it better#but my MIND???ABSTRACTION>? THOUGHTS .ough its so hard#and i really want to push past that but i dont know how and its so .. demoralizing to think that ill get there One Day but i feel#one million and two days away.and not making active process towards it.#i know the first step is to build ur visual library and i feel liek. idk i FEEL LIKEEE theres more 2 it that im missing#but also im depressed as hell n my job is killing my creative drive and the seasonal stuff isnt helping#so maybe i just need 2 give it time (true) but i also like.man i dont know. i want 2 do something w my hands#but everything ive been doing so far has felt soo .hard and fruitless and i definitely dont want 2 turn art into such a stressful thing#fruitless as in like.i dont get any personal satisfaction w it.idgaf abt monetization or algorithms or any of tht#but smtimes thats just what happens and i have 2 weather through and know ill be more equipped 4 this some other time#SAWRYYY IM ALWAYS GOING ON AND ONNN im nromal im normal<3 i just rly like art and it sucks balls whn it feels out of reach#sigh cry fart scroll.(:salute:)
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most exhausted ive ever been: everyone hates my swag soooo bad for WHAT??
#i think this is the maddest ive ever been at the way my life seems to exist to isolate me#it literally only escelated to the point of such anger cos i wanna get laid and i have 0 avenues avaliable by which to pursue that. which is#cool and fun and a good time for everyone#well i guess i technically have the dating apps route but actually rhe thing is#no one in my area wants me at all. i get nothing but radio static#ever since i started getting a little more masc i get like NOTHING where i used to get Some Things#you know how it is.#im high and rambling and i juat got really embarrassed abt how much im talking hahaha#nosy bastard if you read all this. send me an anon abt something if u did. play my arg.
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I don’t think shri’iia would’ve fallen for astarion if he kept up with his overtly flirting act/seduction which is ironic since she’s more comfortable with that compared to the more genuine version of him since she doesn’t know what to do with kindness in general, and this is new territory for her so she doesn’t know what to do with it. anyway. I don’t think shri’iia would’ve fallen for him if their relationship was just about the sex.
the reason why she starts that fwb relationship with him in the first place because she’s using him as a distraction because her oath has been severed and she’s been abandoned by her goddess. she needs something to latch onto or else she will quite literally spiral down since she doesn’t know what purpose she has anymore. shri’iia doesn’t know how to exist outside of lolth, let alone know such a thing was possible. and sex for shri’iia is mostly for the validation that comes with it and less about the pleasure (I’ll get into the whole of that in another post) — not to say she didn’t find enjoyment in it, she does - which is one of the things that sets her off (bc her relationship with her matriarch had never been mutual) but if her relationship with astarion was just about the sex then she would’ve never fallen for him as much as she did.
like the reason why she ends up crushing on him is bc of his companionship. I think they have similar humours and temperament, and they’re both pretty slimy who has no problem with being shitheads and I think that’s the key thing about it. they just have fun together! plain and simple. and I think when it comes down to it, shri’iia is a pretty lonely person who is so so desperate for companionship considering she was either hidden away in solitude or constantly chasing the approval of her mistress for a sliver of her affection and she’s been doing that for a near century. I imagine there are decades where she doesn’t even get a visit from her matriarch, and she is just sitting on the floors of her little tower waiting. I also imagine she talks to herself often because of this. regardless, I think shri’iia just ends up enjoying astarion’s company most of all, and she develops a little crush on him because he makes her laugh, and she also doesn’t realise that she has a crush on him or likes him in that way because the only thing she knows is outright devotion. love to her is something all consuming, not something that comes in quietly. she doesn’t realise she’s fond of him because she has never known such a thing before, or she finds him oddly endearing because her basis of love was her past devotion to lolth and her matriarch that bordered on obsession.
and it’s the funniest thing to me because I see him falling for her similarly too. like the thing to me is that hag romance never needed to have that fwb relationship in the first place; they inevitably will start to like each other because they simply just enjoy each other’s companionship BUT the fwb relationship is also important too since it starts when she is in her most vulnerable state (post oath-breaking), and it also allows him to be vulnerable with her too (let her read his scars).
#and something about how the relationship started on lies and deceit! and using each other!#but develops into something sweeter and more genuine out of the simple fact that they like hanging out together 😭😭😭#and I think their relationship is just this fragile thing that can go sideways so easily.#like though they’re willing to be vulnerable they can easily harm each other too.. so they’re actively choosing not to hurt the other#<- two people who were in such cutthroat hostile and toxic environments before btw#n to me the spawn/oathbreaker ending is when they’re both actively putting in the effort and care#to grow as individuals and to learn how they want to be loved and also what they want love to be. and giving that to another#allowing another to take care of them as well as learning how to stand on ur own two feet.. like there’s sm care and effort there!#so when the act 3 scene finally happens it feels like it’s so earned act 1 hag romance would NOT have been able to do that#simply bc theyve changed and allowed themselves to change. and they stay together out of their own choice too.. n it’s an active choice#they’re both choosing… as opposed to ascended/reformed oath shri’iia where they’re bound together by blood#so it’ll inevitably go stale and sideways bc they’re not choosing each other anymore. they’re not growing they just remain static#anyway just thinking abt these two sobs i lov my hags sm it’s making me vomit#shut up about bg3.
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i will genuinely never understand my dad!!! and i feel guilty for being confused and angered by him!!!! i don't know what he wants and i doubt i ever will
i guess he's known that he's had cancer for over a month now but never told me. and i dont know if it's because he wanted me to reach out/pay attention to him, as he's done in the past or if he just didn't think to, or if it's some other third mysterious reason that i can't think up
we aren't close since he was rarely in my life but i feel like that's something you tell your kid.
and the only reason i found out is because i went to go check and see why he hadn't replied to my message about asking if he wanted to hang out for the thousandth time without getting a response
#[static]#he tells me 'kid im gonna change i miss you i love you we need to hang out more im sorry that i wasnt around'#and then when we try and make plans it's like pulling teeth to get him to follow through#and sure there's been a couple of times in my life where ive had to back out of plans with him but like .....#we're talking less times than i have fingers on one hand in 30 years lol meanwhile he disappears for years without a word regularly#i thought we got somewhere last year when i decided to reach out after i stopped talking to him#we're both adults and we're busy but i somehow manage to have regular scheduled dnd games with 4 other adults twice a month#and i cant get my biological father who claims to want to know me reply to a message#and i know i know i know he's got his own demons and battles but i s2g it's just Frustrating because i dont know what he wants from me#i dont fuck with indecision and i dont like not knowing where i stand with someone#i know that he wont reach out to people in hopes they 'care enough' about him to do it#but like dude .......... SHOW THAT YOU CARE ABOUT ME TOO WTF#i want to be unendingly compassionate to him since he's gotta figure out what he's gonna do regarding his throat cancer#but like ..... what am i supposed to do with this lmao he saw my message and didn't reply and maybe he's busy#but he also didnt reply to any of my other messages asking to make time to see each other#but then he called me this summer to see if i was in town when he was there (and i wasn't and it was out of the blue)#he also posted a lowkey transphobic comedy sketch on his page which is weird because that's not really his politics but also he's old#and i can just hear exactly what he'd say about it if i tried to even bring it up to him ever#idk what he wants from me but i sometimes think even he doesn't know#i think we missed our time to mend things into something that makes sense#anyways sorry for the vent into the void i just got new information and dealing with stuff about my dad is always difficult#i have rarely felt wanted by him and have never felt seen for who i am either
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Everyone describe the what you think the tour will be in one sentence in your tags and whoever is closest wins
#i’ll go first#when I hear the phangenda I think phan+agenda or basically their motive#BUT phan could also be in reference to their relationship and how they have been accused to using it to queerbait#so it could be basically about the internet’s reaction to their relationship and a response to that#but also that sounds more like a video than a tour#in the shot it’s all static tvs their 1st videos gtpwtw and something that looks like a stage#so like humble beginnings mixed with gtpwtw- a very specific choice#that video went with the theme of II which was that#so they obvs wouldn’t do that again bc II was all about how they want to please us but mob mentality and harm etc#I think maybe it’ll be kinda like- so we’ve done all this what’s next- in a funny and interactive way we wanna know what we meant to people#okay seriously comment on this tho bc I’m stumped#phan#phangenda#dnp#dan and phil
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I see it now! I was literally reading and listening about their relationship in your podcast! i really thought that Statice and Nick DESPISE eachother. This AU is interesting, I love it vry vry much. Im not fond of it at first because I can't really Imagine Basil. Basil doing all of that stuff. because he's my favorite character(and I can't really see him being like that). But I eventually learnt to separate them and sees Nick as his own character. Like an actual oc(Still sees him a little bit as Basil if you understand what I mean)( can't wait when Sunny's other friend gets revealed or maybe the parents. *Maybe* they're not that important to the story but the CURIOSITY IS TOO STRONG AND SORRY FOR YAPPING HSJSKAK IT MUST BE TIRING TO ANSWER ANY OF MY QUESTIONS I WON'T DO THAT AGAIN)(Also excuse my grammar also, english is not my first language 😣)
-Anon from the previous previous post.
(the aura I felt after asking that is unimaginable. I used to be so shy to ask anything on people's blog so Im a *bit* proud of my confidence!)
Oh I see !!
Yeah Nick is... more or less an OC, he's got very little to do with Basil now. I refuse to cut of all ties to OMORI/Basil because it's very important to his origins and taking that from him would be taking out a lot of how I personally see him, but, well... He wasn't exactly based off of normal in-game Basil, either, so it makes sense that he's very different. He looks different, acts different, has a different family, age, personality, story, nationality even, different interests... He's like, 70% OC and 30% OMORI AU. Basil is also my favorite character, and that's not how I see him at all either.
I understand why you thought Statice and Nick hated each other — to be fair, there aren't a lot of people who don't hate Nick, lol. Being around him and knowing why he is the way he is makes it easier to love him, though.
#also no parents are important to the story — in nick and statice's case their abscence is what counts even#so i dont think they'll ever even get introduced#i'll do something about the third friend eventually when i'm motivated enough but tbh--#--that plotline is one of the earliest things i worked out about the AU back when it was really just an outlet for venting#so it's not very detailed. i have a very good idea of the events but. yeah since it was for vent purposes and im better now--#--i guess i dont. really want to think about it anymore. lots of things have changed in my brain since november...#i like playing with arsenic and sunny like dolls. it's less about having a concrete storyline and more about playing around with dynamics.#i've always been a slice-of-life person and this is no exception... i'd rather just take snippets of their lives to think about#i like the more mundane aspects. i like putting them in different circumstances and seeing how they'd act#but i'm not super interested in making this a very structured thing with a beginning then story then ending#this au is very personal to me so i guess i like thinking about it and explaining things about it more than i like. making Content for it#there's a difference between Content im giving people and what i do with that AU. so it doesnt end up looking very logical or structured#and it's hard to understand some things if you're from the outside looking in (like statice and nick's relationship for instance)#most of the characterization and info is hidden away in discord chats. sorry everyone#btw ! PLEASE dont be afraid to send more asks i LOVE getting asks like you wouldnt believe#you're not annoying for asking about things i promise !!!!#i love talking about them ! so much !!!#if someone gives me an occasion to talk about them i will NEVER SHUT UP (as im sure you've come to realize by now)#i love asks !!!!!#arsenic#rant#ask#anon
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idk when i made my movie verse i was trying to keep it as unobtrusive as possible since everything was so fresh but man….. thinking about all the mike afton theories where he wasn’t necessarily too young to remember anything related to that but his “memories” are just so unreliable due to trauma
#been seeing a LOT of talk about it which is also something i considered as a possibility pre movie and MAN#mike who sure could just be constantly dissociating about his past#yea his brother who was uhhh taken in [tv static] vague woods location and his parents named uh [more tv static] who were just like#families in old commercials and certainly not with any familiarity with a Certain Restaurant-#you have got to admit. That Is So Fucking FNAF. That's So Novel Charlie Core. IM JUST SAYING......#and of course this could also be used as an explanation for the emily theory and why he just has zero memories of fazbear#BUT... you know. This Is A Michael Afton Blog DJSFHGDFSJ#unfortunately a very difficult idea to work with BECAUSE if the dreams are entirely unreliable that would leave Everything up in the air#but hooo boy it's a concept. canon who he has literally been my oc this whole time what if-#⁂ ・゚: i was looking for a job‚ and then i found a job‚ and heaven knows i’m miserable now ➛ ooc#and of course i still don't want to be too obtrusive like there is POTENTIAL for his dynamic with vanessa here oh god!#as for abby and garrett who knows i don't it's not like this is a coherent post anyway-
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Everyone's always hit me with the "you're a hypochondriac" so I stopped mentioning symptoms to my parents and now that leaves me in a bind because my anxious ass trying to deal with getting this stuff sorted? Horrid.
#ive dealth with static vision for ages. i mentioned a long time ago to parents and eye doctor about eye floaters#that souldnt go away and he was like thats nkthing to worry about#but its such a pain because it literally makes it hard to see and ive just been dealing with it#thankfully the static isnt as bad as it could be for some people its like foggy or opaque i guess#its pretty clear for me but its synapses of light pinpricks constantly and eye floaters that refuse to leave#and its like no wonder i never liked wearing my glasses at least then it was hard to see anything anyway#its been driving me more bonkers than it ever has and idk if its actually visual snow syndrome or a symptom of something else#like autism spectrum disorder wowie zowie#or even just my anxiety zooweemama
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one of my friends may be able to get me a rollator 🎉
it belonged to their grandmother (i think?) and they've been given the OK to give me one which is actually really exciting
#disability#chronic pain#fibromyalgia#mobility aid#i love my cane and it will still be my go to#but for like flare ups or for big events and stuff???? a rollator is amazing to have#i rented a wheelchair for a day a while back and it was great and all#but a rollator would have probably been way more helpful that day#i enjoy walking and am capable of doing so i just need something to lean on when my leg(s) do(es) weird shit#also something to put stuff on instead of juggline 18 different things with one free hand#especially when im having hand pain#i have so many thoughts about this but my brain is static right now#cane user#also several years ago when i talked to my gp about mobility aids she literally said “get a rollator”#and then my rheumatologist said “start with a cane” so i did that#i guess this really was just the planned progression of things#and I didn't need a prescription for either. i was just told to go to a store to get sizing
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I hope we're still friends, yeah, I hope you don't mind
#evil lovecore#static#sweetheart#spilled ink#Heart bc the heart is Sweetheart's organ. Ribcage is supposed to be a ref to timeline C#Vague squiggles pointing to eyes supposed to highlight static-ness#lines for to highlight scars (static's hands. Sweet's arms)#tbh this turned out more peaceful than I intended :P. what ever#spongebob stance. sweetstatic bad however rghghghghgh#sorry I keep drawing people Laying Down. that pose scratches my brain#also it's kinnndd of supposed to be a mirror of the short thing i wrote#under misc. titled 'you left some holes in the plotline I left some holes in your clothes'#like home vs shock. you get what I'm trying to do#controversial take. not allowed is a sweetstatic song#drawing sun beams is hard. thats what this is supposed to be#:P#something something the tragedy of the fact that in another lifetime we could have been friends#but you fucked everything up and broke everything beyond repair
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