#simply bc theyve changed and allowed themselves to change. and they stay together out of their own choice too.. n it’s an active choice

[swordmaid]

I don’t think shri’iia would’ve fallen for astarion if he kept up with his overtly flirting act/seduction which is ironic since she’s more comfortable with that compared to the more genuine version of him since she doesn’t know what to do with kindness in general, and this is new territory for her so she doesn’t know what to do with it. anyway. I don’t think shri’iia would’ve fallen for him if their relationship was just about the sex.

the reason why she starts that fwb relationship with him in the first place because she’s using him as a distraction because her oath has been severed and she’s been abandoned by her goddess. she needs something to latch onto or else she will quite literally spiral down since she doesn’t know what purpose she has anymore. shri’iia doesn’t know how to exist outside of lolth, let alone know such a thing was possible. and sex for shri’iia is mostly for the validation that comes with it and less about the pleasure (I’ll get into the whole of that in another post) — not to say she didn’t find enjoyment in it, she does - which is one of the things that sets her off (bc her relationship with her matriarch had never been mutual) but if her relationship with astarion was just about the sex then she would’ve never fallen for him as much as she did.

like the reason why she ends up crushing on him is bc of his companionship. I think they have similar humours and temperament, and they’re both pretty slimy who has no problem with being shitheads and I think that’s the key thing about it. they just have fun together! plain and simple. and I think when it comes down to it, shri’iia is a pretty lonely person who is so so desperate for companionship considering she was either hidden away in solitude or constantly chasing the approval of her mistress for a sliver of her affection and she’s been doing that for a near century. I imagine there are decades where she doesn’t even get a visit from her matriarch, and she is just sitting on the floors of her little tower waiting. I also imagine she talks to herself often because of this. regardless, I think shri’iia just ends up enjoying astarion’s company most of all, and she develops a little crush on him because he makes her laugh, and she also doesn’t realise that she has a crush on him or likes him in that way because the only thing she knows is outright devotion. love to her is something all consuming, not something that comes in quietly. she doesn’t realise she’s fond of him because she has never known such a thing before, or she finds him oddly endearing because her basis of love was her past devotion to lolth and her matriarch that bordered on obsession.

and it’s the funniest thing to me because I see him falling for her similarly too. like the thing to me is that hag romance never needed to have that fwb relationship in the first place; they inevitably will start to like each other because they simply just enjoy each other’s companionship BUT the fwb relationship is also important too since it starts when she is in her most vulnerable state (post oath-breaking), and it also allows him to be vulnerable with her too (let her read his scars).