#it's because i think the map called it a golf course but I only really remember the golf part

[ruitethewingedfox]

ok so I've been messing around in Google maps as of late for Fanfic Purposes and now I'm a bit confused; whenever "hilltop road" is mentioned, does that mean the one in London or the one in Oxford with the golf course (?) at the end?

[acerace]

...you have opened my eyes to a vast universe of VintageBeef lore that I was unaware of. I knew about the New Hermit Order, of course, and the UHC invention, and I've watched a few of his CTM things but -- I will take all the info and lore you feel like giving out because Beef is amazing and my knowledge is so small.

Vintagebeef my beloved <3

So the thing is, right, until about 2016 I only watched two (2) youtubers- Vintagebeef for Minecraft and aDrive for Pokemon (and funnily enough both of them are named Dan irl). So I've watched most of Beef's videos over the years and have a general knowledge of most of his stuff, except because it's been like a decade I don't remember where most of the lore comes from XD

The thing with him is that he doesn't do Lore tm the way other mcyters often do lore- he doesn't have an extensive RP series to draw from like Grian, doesn't have a solo world with steadily increasing amounts of lore like Etho or Zisteau, and while he's played on SMPs and been involved in storylines before it's not really the focus of his episodes unlike with Evo or Legacy or Empires

So where does that leave us?

IRL, Beef always has multiple series running at the same time. Often he's playing on an smp while doing a singleplayer, often modded, series as well as a CTM or modpack with a group of friends. For example, right now he's playing on Hermitcraft, doing weekly Pixelmon and Building a Zoo episodes, and a CTM map with Slip. And to me, this translates to one thing: Beef is an adventurer. He travels frequently- he explores a world and when he decides he's done, he leaves for the next one. That's the basis of my personal interpretation of his series and his character for my writing.

Ok so reading this back, this got extremely long and didn't explain much in the way of lore, somehow? If anyone has any additions to add please do so, I am very definitely leaving out a lot and would love to see what other lore people remember and are using for Beef! I didn’t include the Hermitcraft stuff since my memory of season 4 is blurry (his base was themed after the Martian, that much I know, and he and Iskall were buddies :D) and most of the s5 NHO lore is best watched from Bdub’s perspective from what I remember, and the only s6 stuff is a single line in Hermitgang and then the Area 77 arc with its possibility of an NHO reunion which we did not get rip. And s7 of course had the cloning machine and also the Podzol Party as the main lore. So all the original rambling is still below the cut though it is very long, and I'm gonna bullet point the main stuff here instead:

Actual canonical things:

Invented UHC and was the only survivor of the first ever uhc (Mindcrack UHC s1)

Married to an ender dragon (one of the UHCs I think), later father to a different dragon (Mindcrack season 3? I think?)

Might not have legs if you choose to take that joke as canon (Mindcrack s2)

Was a wizard (RAD)

is a zookeeper (Building a Zoo) 

Had a wife and kids (Sims in Minecraft)

Part of the Trial of the B Team court case (Mindcrack)

NHO founder, founder of the Podzol Party (Hermitcraft)

Created a cloning machine that sort of works (Hermitcraft)

Played the Forest which is I believe the first time he and Keralis played together (look up the trigger warnings for this one, it's a horror game)

Was the creator/owner of Sourceblock SMP (featuring some familiar faces if you know Legacy, Empires, or MCC) and there is literal magic from a mysterious sourceblock of water that teleports people and summons mobs and probably more stuff that I haven't seen yet since I'm still watching it myself

Things you can infer:

Good with animals (Life in the Woods, Pixelmon, Ark)

Is a car nerd (irl and all of the car games he's played)

Is a highly experienced adventurer who has traveled through dozens of worlds both vanilla and modded, across multiple dimensions (Twilight Forest, the Aether, the Betweenlands, Limbo), completed dozens of monuments, fought in blood sports, survived apocalypse after apocalypse, tamed dinosaurs, and played a lot of prop hunt and golf with your friends

If you're looking for what to watch for lore purposes, I'd say the Mindcrack UHCs and Team Canada's RAD series are pretty good, definitely Sourceblock and HC s5, plus the Diversity CTM maps and Ruins of the Mindcrackers maybe? And Mindcrack Prank Wars for the chaos and the origin of Team Canada. And if you can handle horror than the Forest is fun and if you don't do horror you can watch the Pojkband play golf or prop hunt they're hilarious I love them sm I want a Pojkband reunion So Bad 

Beef's first series was a singleplayer series in beta 1.4_01 though he had played the game extensively before that, and was a big fan of Guude, having watched his own Minecraft videos. The series was functionally a hardcore one where if he died Beef would delete the world and start again! I haven't actually Watched this series so idk if he died or how often lmao. When Guude made Mindcrack, which was btw one of the very first Minecraft SMPs, he also hosted a competition for people to join, and Beef submitted a video (which is still viewable on his channel I believe!) and won, and was added to Mindcrack in season 2 :D (fun fact, Guude said that even if Beef hadn’t won he would have added him anyway) 

Two running jokes emerged from Mindcrack- pulling a Vintagebeef and Beef doesn't have legs. The first is a reference to Beef dying of fall damage (I believe the exact instance was him trying to jump into his swimming pool and failing spectacularly) and after the incident, every time someone died of fall damage they were pulling a Vintagebeef. The second joke comes from Guude, who joked that the reason Beef wasn't going to a convention was because he didn't have legs, and then he pranked Beef's base by building a giant pair of legs at the entrance to his castle so you had to walk between them to get into the base. This joke has long since died and both Beef and Guude feel pretty bad about it iirc because there were people who genuinely thought Beef was disabled and were emailing him supportive messages and stuff oops. So if you go looking on the Salad or find old Mindcrack fics, you might see references to Beef having prosthetic legs!

Mindcrack also brought about the creation of several Player groups- Team Nancy Drew, Team Canada, and GOB to name a few relevant to Beef. Team Nancy Drew consists of Beef, Pauseunpause, Guude, and Baj, who formed to investigate a prank on one of the members but I forget who. They're named Nancy Drew after the detective! Team Canada also formed in retaliation to pranks, with it consisting of Beef, Etho, and Pause, the three Canadian members on the server (not including Adlington who moved to Canada but never joined the group). There was also a Team America who pranked them with American flags everywhere. GOB is Guude, OMGChad, and Beef, who played stuff like the Ragecraft, Pantheon, and Monstrosity ctms together but that's way down the line lol

Team Nancy Drew is also notable for inventing UHC. It was Beef's brainchild but it was the four of them who first played it! The first UHC had the four of them working to kill the dragon with no natural regen, with everyone dying but Beef, who "won" the UHC. The second uhc was still dragon focused and iirc is where Beef married the dragon? Memories are hazy but they do kill the dragon in this one I think. UHC was then revamped as a pvp event and became a regular Mindcrack game every few months, featuring most of the Mindcrackers and several special guests, including Dinnerbone, who as we know Thanos-snapped Doc's arm out of existence as a result of Doc killing him in one of them

In one of the seasons of Mindcrack, Beef invited swedish Mindcracker and good friend Anderzel to go caving with him and invented ABBA Rules caving, where the winner takes it all. ABBA Rules is a game where each ore (and also dungeon loot like nametags) is assigned a point value and the person with the most points at the end wins and gets to keep all the stuff collected from the game.

In Mindcrack season 3?, Beef punched the ender dragon in an... awkward area, so when the dragon died and left the egg behind, Guude said Beef was the father of the egg XD I don't remember if I watched s3 so I have no idea if anything Happened with this concept but *history of the world voice* you could make lore out of this!

So Team Canada has played a Lot of CTM maps (which fun fact were pretty much invented by another Mindcrack member, Vechs, with his Super Hostile series! Super Hostile has a bunch of things called "Zistonian", which are references to another Mindcrack member Zisteau, who has a very wild singleplayer series with even wilder lore but I digress). In Ruins of the Mindcrackers, they had a running joke that Beef was Etho and Pause's mom, which is a joke we can leave in the past actually /lh. They also played all the Diversity maps, Sky Factory, Terra Restore, Uncharted Territory uhhh and a couple more ctms and adventure maps! Each map kinda has its own story so in Diversity 3 for example they were trapped in a simulation? I think? Team Canada also recently played the Roguelike Adventures and Dungeons modpack, aka RAD, in which Beef was a wizard with a magic staff that could do anything from summon lightning to control hostile mobs.

Sourceblock SMP is a vanilla survival 1.14 series that ran for one season and the series starts with each of the Players being drawn to a strange sparkling water source that, once they touch it, brings them to the Sourceblock world. It also summons a giant zombie at one point. There's probably more lore for this series but like I said I haven't watched it all the way through yet 

He has a Patreon server called VintageCraft and has done a series or two on there as well, and played a few UHCs with them, so lore that how you will! 

Beef also played a few popular mods, notably Pixelmon, Life in the Woods, and Feed the Beast, with LitW being singleplayer and the other multiplayer. He's also recently played the Zoo and Wild Animals mod a lot. He did a short series with the Minecraft Comes Alive mod where he married one of the villagers and had two children, so that's canon now :D he’s played a Lot of Pixelmon starting when the mod first came out iirc (he chose Turtwig in his first series and built a Grass gym, then made a Normal gym in another series in uhh 2016) and he still plays to this day. Quite a few Hermits played on his Pixelmon servers with him, like Wels, Etho, Iskall, Stress, Slip, Zueljin, and also Guude and Phedran (a Mindcrack adjacent player and creator of the LitW modpack) and a few Mindcrackers on the older servers 

Mindcrack and friends played a lot of other games too- 7 Days to Die, Ark Survival Evolved, Unturned, to name a few, so you can pull a lot of lore out of these as well. Speaking of friends and non-Minecraft games, Beef teamed up with Pause, Keralis, and Slip (a former Hermit) to play the horror game the Forest, which saw them stuck on an island trying to survive against terrifying mutated human... things. They played it a few times as the game updated but as afaik it's the first time Beef played with Keralis and possibly Slip and since the game starts with the Player's airplane crashing, that could totally be how Beef first met them in-universe 

I... think? that’s everything I mentioned in the tags? There is probably way more stuff I’ve forgotten that stems from inside jokes and things that happen within each series, but I hope that was a) helpful and b) at least somewhat comprehensible lmao 

[twdmusicboxmystery]

TWD 11x22: First Thoughts

How did everyone like ep 22? I liked it a lot. I won’t say there was tons and tons of TD symbolism. Some things to talk about for sure, but it was more of an action filled episode, which always means slightly less symbolism. But that’s okay with me. They’re barreling toward the end of this arc with the CW and toward the end of the flagship series, and obviously they’re trying to squeeze a lot in.

***As always, spoilers abound below for the episode. Don’t read until you’ve watched!***

Probably the biggest thing I saw here was that Negan and Annie are in a Bethyl template. I’ve mentioned this in previous weeks. The part where Negan is assaulted by the troopers on the train tracks, and then Annie tries to attack them and is dragged away, is a parallel to when Beth was taken from the funeral home. Negan even dropped the map at that part, which lines up with Beth dropping her black bag fully of stuff.

Later, when Negan and Zeke go to talk to Tyler, who at first refuses to help them, Negan is twirling his spoon all around, as if he really wants us to notice it. Spoon parallels, especially to Beth’s spoon at the golf club.

They do meet later when he goes to see her and she’s napping. But the template isn’t complete yet. I’m not sure whether to believe recent spoilers that have surfaced. Taking them with a grain of salt for now. But either way, it will be interesting to see where this goes.

I’m going to do a whole post about the Donnie situation. Probably tomorrow. But for now, let’s just point out that literally NOTHING happened. People were afraid this would be the episode where Donnie would go canon, because of this tunnel scene. People were calling it the “tunnel of love” because of a song that was attached to it by the TWD crew. But guys, literally nothing happened. There was no plot at all in the tunnel. They used it to get inside Alexandria, which was important, but that’s it. While traveling through the tunnel, they said about four sentences to one another. No more. People have got to stop freaking out about Donnie.

I get that the writers are teasing/trolling it pretty hard right now. But we’ve always said Donnie would not be a romantic thing and, yet again, we were right. There are only two episodes left in the flagship show and then Lauren Ridloff has about 5 projects lined up that are NOT TWD. So I’m telling  you, they’re not about to force a relationship in less than 2 episodes, when they have a billion other things to do to tie up the CW arc.

That’s all I’ll say for today. Tomorrow I’ll do a deeper dive into what we’ve seen with these two lately and what it means.

Other things of note in this episode. Luke and Jules resurfaced, which was fun. The thing that stuck out to me is them saying that they were gone when the CW took over, and returned to find their home had been enslaved. Just jumped out at me as similar to the Charleston/Swamp Fox template, which we believe to be a Beth foreshadow. I’ll keep an eye on this as the story line progresses.’

Of course Lydia dropped a knife that was picked up by a smart walker. Not sure where they’re going with that, but kind of freaky, right? Of course Eugene was found guilty and sentenced to death. 

And Mercer finally decided to do the right thing. I thought Maggie’s ‘bring it’ line from last episode was pretty awesome. But Mercer managed to top it here! ;D

The title of the episode is interesting. I had to think long and hard about what it means and why they called the episode this. And of course my fellow theorists helped out a lot, too. They pointed out that we have several martyrs in this episode. Eugene is a martyr, having been unjustly found guilty of something he didn’t truly do. Negan offers himself as a sacrifice to save his wife. Annie is then chosen as an unwilling sacrifice, though she’s completely innocent. (Something we’ve often said about Beth in Coda.) Ezekiel then stands between them, and others join him. So, the episode is full of martyrs who, through a show of faith, do the right thing, and are rewarded in the end. So, it’s kind of a “faith precedes the miracle” sort of theme.

How does this relate to Beth? Well, aside from being a reference to what she believes and some of her direct dialogue in Inmates, I also think it’s more of what we’ve already seen, in that this is a retelling of 4b, but the results are different.

I’ll talk about this in more detail later in the week, but last episode, Carol said to Maggie that they were no longer alone and would figure this out. That’s the opposite of what happened in 4x13, Alone. Beth was taken, alone, to Grady. Daryl was left, alone, without her. While the other characters might not have been completely alone, they were separated into small groups. With Carol saying they aren’t alone anymore, it’s a direct opposite to what happened before.

Similarly, when Beth told Daryl to have faith, he said faith hadn’t done shit for them. So, it was a denial of faith on his part. Here, we’re seeing people practice faith and be rewarded for it. So, retelling of S4, but also kind of the opposite. Things will be better this time around. Now, we’re just waiting for Beth to show up.

Other than that, Maggie finds Hershel, and it’s unclear what they were doing with him in that room, but he doesn’t know where the other kiddos are. They’re still missing, but may be somewhere in Alexandria. I’ll stop there for tonight. But stay tuned. Lots more to discuss from this episode.

[darkarfs]

single moments from the Trump presidency that would have defined/ended any other politician’s career

- saying he could “buy Greenland” - suggesting it was a good idea to nuke hurricanes - saying there would be fewer forest fires if we just got rid of all the leaves - asking Trudeau if Canada had tried to burn down the White House - autographing pictures of shooting victims - when he kept talking about how they drop bowling balls on cars to test them in japan and no one could figure out where he could have even gotten the idea - when he suggested Seoul should just move away from the North Korean border - introducing West Virginia’s governor as ‘the largest, most beautiful man’ - when he tweeted SEE YOU IN COURT! right after an appeals court ruled against him. like. yeah man. they just did. - the time he didn't know how to close an umbrella so he just dropped it and walked away - fighting with the Vietnam vets over whether napalm or agent orange is used in the Ride of the Valkyries scene in Apocalypse Now and then when they insisted it was napalm, Trump said they disagreed with him because they didn't like the movie (The line is famously, literally “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”) - using his position as the single most powerful person in the world to promote Goya canned beans - when he bragged about the crowd size at the hurricane shelter in coastal Texas (”what a turnout”) - signing Bibles. What. - thinking the F-22 is invisible to the naked eye - smiling and giving a thumbs up during a photo op with a baby orphaned by a mass shooting - putting a candy bar on a Minion’s head because he’s never interacted with a child before -  when he interpreted some stray comment about transparency in the process to mean his border wall should literally be transparent, so passersby are not beaned by bundles of drugs and cans being thrown over the wall - the time he talked about having to flush his massive dumps 10 times and then immediately tried to blame the dumps on his supporters - the fake Sharpee’d hurricane map, which he did solely to not appear wrong on television - suggesting that federal employees working unpaid during the gov shutdown should just “do a work around” at the grocery store if they can’t pay for groceries - the fucking eclipse thing - the fucking three-pointers with paper towels to Puerto Rican hurricane victims - when he told thousands of Boy Scouts a story about his rich friend's fuckboat and then complained about Hilary for the remainder of the speech - when the called the CEO of Lockheed Martin “Marilyn Lockheed” (her last name is Hewson) which was objectively funnier than “Tim Apple” - when he picked an argument with Baltic world leaders because he thought the Baltics were the Balkans - the first time his team had a meeting in the cabinet room they couldn’t figure out how to turn on the lights and ended up just having the meeting in the dark -  The time he said Andrew Jackson was "really angry that he saw what was happening with regard to the Civil War, he said 'There's no reason for this.'" (Jackson died 16 years before the Civil War, and he owned 150 slaves.) - told a 7-year-old boy there was no Santa Claus on Christmas - the team of staffers whose only job was to tape back together documents he had torn up because he’s just THAT used to destroying evidence, because they couldn’t get him to stop ripping them up, but legally, the documents had to be archived - when he said the Continental Army took over the British airports during the Revolution - no sanctions on Russian soldiers killing American soldiers - “I take no responsibility for this pandemic.” - when touring the damage the Louisiana gulf coast after Hurricane Laura (just a few months ago!), he started giving first responders autographed pieces of paper, which he told them to sell on eBay for $10,000 - when he thought "clean coal" meant that the miners dug it out of the ground and physically cleaned it - the goddamn fast food catering - trying to trick the family of a teen killed by a US diplomat's wife who fled justice into meeting her, Ellen-style - pushing the Prime Minister of Montenegro out of the way to preen - that time he called into Fox & Friends and ranted for so long that they politely but firmly kicked him off - hiring an Obama impersonator solely to berate him - having a button installed on his desk that let him order Diet Coke on a whim. And sometimes using that button upwards of 13 times a day. - that time when a kid handed him a hat to sign, and he signed the hat, but instead of handing it back, he just threw it into the middle of the crowd - autographing the guestbook at the Holocaust memorial, with an added “had such a great time!” - when he zoned out and wondered where a woman's dead relatives were DIRECTLY after she had said her mother six brothers were killed. (Actual exchange: “They killed my mother, my six brothers...” “Where are they now?”) - sending 2,000 soldiers to the border to stop “the caravan,” having their pictures taken, and then recalling them all. - consoling a dead soldier’s family by saying “he knew what he was getting into.” - when he said no one could climb over the border wall because there would be no way down, and then belatedly remembered rope - when he congratulated the Great Lakes on their "record deepness" - calling Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas” at an event meant to honor Navajo code talkers  - “Shithole countries” - calling Baltimore “rat-infested” - tweeting “too bad!” right after Elijah Cummings’ house was broken into - calling the White House “a dump” a month into moving in, which led to first both him and Melania, and then just Melania by herself, staying in Trump Tower for almost 5 months, costing taxpayers around $100,000 a day - an entire quarter of his presidency spent on his own golf courses, costing taxpayers around $141,000,000, NOT counting the Secret Service detail (they were charged for rooms and golf carts, since these were Trump’s OWN golf courses) - using “Pocahontas” again to slur Elizabeth Warren while talking down to a Native American journalist - holding a rally in Pittsburgh and trying to woo the locals by ranting about how the statue of Joe Paterno, the accused pedophilia enabler who was coach of a rival sports team, should go back up - confusingly having bigger salt and pepper shakers than everyone else in his administration, because everything to him is a dick-measuring contest - when he said he would “run in and take care of” school shooters, to school shooting victims - appointing fucking DeVos, Miller, Pompeo, Mnuchin, Nunes - inciting a seditious white supremacist mob to make sure he’s president until he’s 85, resulting in 5 dead (for which I am constantly wondering...”really? FOR THIS GUY?”) - drafted a proposal to open 94% of previously protected American shorelines to offshore drilling - when he walked up the stairs to Air Force One with toilet paper stuck to his shoe -  at least 44 times in March, April and early May in which he downplayed the threat of the virus calling it “very well under control” again and again - when somebody asked him his favorite book and he pointed at a bookshelf and said “there are some over there” - meeting with the goddamn MyPillow guy to discuss overturning election results and declaring martial law - impeached twice, was golfing both times the vote went through - 70 pardons for known criminals (including Bannon), 70 sentences commuted, just to be a spiteful little toad - when he blathered on about how much he loved the queen, the totally hacked her off - when Hope Hicks steamed his pants as he was wearing them - getting mad-pissed at White House kitchen staff because they couldn’t recreate McDonald’s and it was too late to order  and I wonder how much I missed. I bet there’s a McSweeney’s article listing all of it.

[sycorpse]

So here's an idea I've had for a while! I picked it up halfway through because sometimes I have issues with beginnings and just want to write whatever I have in mind, but it sprialed from there but it's a bit disjointed because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do exactly and then the Salad Gang decided to stream mini golf so I was kinda distracted but I just wanted to post something.

So, the originally idea of this came from the night that Sykkuno messed up whatever he said and said NEXT time he saw Corpse maybe he'd get the merch. And so it was like wait. Have they already met? Why did they not say anything? So I narrowed it down to it had to be in Cali/LA post-Christmas but pre-Sykkuno moving to Vegas. Like Rust days. So I came up with this being a middle of the night Discord call turned into a Corpse anxiety attack where Sykkuno goes to comfort him.

The lead up to the kiss, like the almost kiss and Corpse turning away and the discussion was the original thought. It's a headcanon I've had for a while, especially on Sykkuno's side. Otherwise, there's TW for mentioned child abuse(Corpse's past, it's not really discussed in story, but Sykkuno knows the backstory) and allusions to suicidal thoughts(But it's getting better!).

Thank you for reading! I hope it's not too confusing!

Corpse pulled his face out of Sykkuno’s neck and met his eyes. Sykkuno continued to rub his lower back gently.

“Feeling any better?” Sykkuno asked softly. Corpse nodded.

“Yeah. Thanks for driving over, Sy. I know you’re tired from streaming Rust and getting ready to move,” Corpse said.

“It’s alright. I didn’t want to leave you alone with the way your anxiety was flaring up,” Sykkuno said.

“Thank you,” Corpse said and sighed and gave a small smile. Sykkuno smiled back.

“Your smile is, um, it’s nice,” Sykkuno said and blushed. Corpse’s smile widened a bit and Sykkuno rubbed his thumb on the scar on his chin.

“Liar,” Corpse said despite the smile, his self hatred was thick.

“Not a lie,” Sykkuno said, “You’re quite handsome.”

“I am not. And you cannot say that, Sy. You’re even more adorable in person,” Corpse said and Sykkuno looked away.

“Liar,” Sykkuno said. Corpse chuckled and the sound sent butterflies through Sykkuno’s stomach. He glanced up and their eyes met again and everything seemed to stop. Corpse’s eyes dropped to Sykkuno’s lips for a moment before glancing back up and Sykkuno wasn’t sure who started leaning in first. At the last second, Corpse turned his face away and Sykkuno’s nose brushed against his cheekbones.

“Corpse?” Sykkuno breathed.

“You’re straight,” Corpse whispered.

“Only to please my parents. They’re disappointed enough to say I’m a streamer, they don’t want to have to say their son is a gay streamer,” Sykkuno said.

“No. You’re straight,” Corpse said, like he was trying to convince himself.

“I’m not. You, however, are,” Sykkuno said, but with the way Corpse had been looking at him, he had been able to fool himself into thinking Corpse felt the same. Had been falling these past four months just like Sykkuno had been.

“I’m scared,” Corpse said.

“You have no reason to be scared around me,” Sykkuno said, breath still against Corpse’s cheek.

“Don’t you see, Sykkuno? That’s what scares me the most. That I’m not scared around you,” Corpse said and he fisted his hands in Sykkuno’s hoodie. “I was straight. I thought I was. But then I met you and suddenly I’m not sure. I just know my heart skips a beat when we talk. I think about you. I watch your streams and I feel safe. I trust you. And when I’m alone it terrifies me because I thought I was secure in my heterosexuality and now I’ve lost that too.”

“I’m sorry,” Sykkuno said.

“No. Don’t apologize. Everything changed last year but in the end, it was for the better, I think,” Corpse said.

“I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Especially not you,” Sykkuno said and Corpse pulled back to look for him and in the dim light, Sykkuno could see his eyes searching for the lie in his words. “I like you, Corpse. I assumed it would always be unrequited and it hurt. A lot. But keeping quiet was better than saying something and losing you.”

“Agreed,” Corpse said and before either of them could say anything more, he leaned forward to kiss Sykkuno. Sykkuno made a noise of surprise and he wasn’t sure what to do with his hands before he reached up and slipped a hand into Corpse’s curls and kept the other on his lower back. He tilted his head to angle the kiss better, and Corpse took the opportunity to deepen the kiss.

They kissed for what felt like hours, actions saying what they had been terrified to put into words. The kisses were passionate, desperate, they couldn’t get enough of each other. Sykkuno learned Corpse loved having his hair tugged, and his groan did things to Sykkuno’s insides. Corpse seemed to know all of Sykkuno’s sensitive spots like his heart had had a map to them all along, and seemed to be equally egged on by Sykkuno’s moans and whines, especially when he reached the sensitive spots along his collarbone. Eventually, Sykkuno tugged Corpse’s hair hard enough to pull him away from his neck. They looked at each other for a minute and then Sykkuno kissed him, just a couple short and chaste kisses and he could tell Corpse was trying not to try to chase his lips.

“Wow,” Corpse said and Sykkuno giggled.

“Indeed,” He said. Corpse leaned their foreheads together and giggled for a minute. “I really like you, Corpse. I know it’s scary. Trust me, I know. I’m scared too and I feel so horrible that I leave the state on Friday. But I want to try to figure us out. If you want to.”

“I do too. I don’t normally like long distance but I don’t normally like people for people like I do you so I want to try this. As long as you promise me that you like me. Even after I opened up today?” Corpse said. Sykkuno met his eyes.

“Of course not. Your parent’s physical and emotional abuse and neglect was not your fault, never, ever your fault. You had a hard life and you pushed through it. You are so handsome and kind and I wish you showed yourself an ounce of kindness. I miss you when you aren’t in lobbies and I worry about your health and even now I am terrified of being close to you without me being tested for COVID. But I could never get enough of this. Of you. We’ll make this work. I like you and I don’t see that changing anytime soon,” Sykkuno said.

“Good, I’m glad, because neither do I,” Corpse said, “And this is worth the risk of you not being tested.”

“We’ll see,” Sykkuno said softly. Corpse nuzzled into his neck.

“I’ll be fine. Live a little, Sy,” He said and chuckled when Sykkuno squirmed at the air on his neck. “Sensitive?”

“You now know I am,” Sykkuno said and Corpse laughed more. They stretched out on the sofa, Corpse’s head on Sykkuno’s chest and Sykkuno playing with Corpse’s curls. “I can live a little if you’re alive. I mean that in a lot of ways.”

“I know. And it’s getting better,” Corpse assured, “Everyday I find more to live for. And now I have you.”

“I’m glad. And I’m still only a call away even if I am in Vegas. We’ll figure out how to be comfortable in our sexualities. If we have each other, there’s no reason to be scared because that’s all we need. And when numbers go down, we can travel back and forth easier. We’ll make us work,” Sykkuno said.

“We will,” Corpse agreed. They fell silent and eventually they dozed off. When they woke, the morning sun was still weak and their morning kiss was chaste and shy but still hopeful for the months to come.

[lov3nerdstuff]

Voluptas Noctis Aeternae {Part 4.8}

*Severus Snape x OC*

Summary: It is the year 1983 when the ordinary life of Robin Mitchell takes a drastic turn: she is accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite the struggles of being a muggle-born in Slytherin, she soon discovers her passion for Potions, and even manages the impossible: gaining the favor of Severus Snape. Throughout the years, Robin finds that the not quite so ordinary Potions Professor goes from being a brooding stranger to being more than she had ever deemed possible. An ally, a mentor, a friend... and eventually, the person she loves the most. Through adventure, prophecies and the little struggles of daily life in a castle full of mysteries, Robin chooses a path for herself, an unlikely friendship blossoms into something more, and two people abandoned by the world can finally find a home.

General warnings: professor x student, blood, violence, trauma, neglectful families, bullying, cursing

Words: 4.6k

Read Part 1.1 here! All Parts can be found on the Masterlist!

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It was the middle of April when Robin finished the very last of Snape's book collection. The day she returned the very last book to him was both a sad and an exciting one, for Robin wasn't entirely sure what he would give her to do next. To her disappointment, he merely remarked that she had read everything he could give her at the present time, and then continued with his work as if it was nothing special. Maybe it wasn't… but somehow Robin had hoped for a little praise at least, if not a prospect of what to do next. Thus she stuck to doing class assignments and readings for a while (she managed half a week, which was already more than anticipated), until at last she just couldn't handle the lack of private studies anymore.

She had already finished most of the library books about potions, herbology, and magical creatures, which is why she decided to find a new topic to read up on rather than trying to find more books on the topics she already had studied profoundly. Thus she started reading all the books about the dark arts the library had to offer, but more out of interest in the mysteries that hid behind the generic title than out of preference for the correlating class. And really, it was a weirdly broad topic. Everything that wasn't allowed or was dangerous to use fell into this category, but more often than not Robin wondered why exactly something was considered 'forbidden' or at least unappreciated to use. Sure, most of the things described in her newest reads were potentially harmful for someone involved, but honestly, so were kitchen knives, or golf clubs, or cars. And nobody bothered forbidding them either.

That's the only revelation she's had by the time exams rolled around, and the exact point where she found herself stuck at now as she sat in the potions classroom like always, on a Friday evening in the second week of June. Not even a week before she would have to go back to her parents' house for the summer.

"Do you have a minute?" Robin asked as she looked over at Snape to her right with an inquiring expression. Some time in March she had started sitting at the side table next to his desk rather than at her usual seat in the students' rows when she came here for coffee and work at night. Admittedly, she'd occasionally been sitting there way before March already, whenever students were in the classroom for detention, but somehow after one particularly detention-heavy week in March, she hadn't bothered going back to her original seat, and he hadn't bothered asking her to. That's how she came to sit at the table next to his desk permanently now, in the evenings at least.

"Of course. I wanted to talk to you about a certain issue anyway, but feel free to start." He replied and closed the book he'd been reading for the last hour to meet Robin's gaze.

"You probably noticed that I've been reading up on the whole 'dark arts' thing over the last weeks, except for the week studying for my exams that is, and well… I just don't understand why there is such a thing as dark arts in the first place." Robin shrugged and closed her own book as well. "It's just more spells that happen to be a tad more dangerous than others. But the danger is just a potential, isn't it? I mean… the magic isn't good or bad in itself, it's the person using it who determines that. And calling it 'dark magic' is kind of taking the responsibility of making this choice from the witch or wizard who makes it."

"What exactly do you mean by that?"

"I mean…" She sighed and paused for a second to think of a good example. "Take a kitchen knife, for example. It's just a tool in itself, and only because some people use it to stab others doesn't make it inherently bad, nor do the people who use it to chop vegetables make it an inherently good thing. It has the potential to be both, and if one isn't aware of that, there always is a danger in its use."

"I agree."

"So why do we learn in school that there is good magic and bad magic? Why don't we learn to work with the responsibility of dealing with a neutral magic that leaves it entirely up to us how to use it?" That was the actual question Robin had been meaning to ask, but it had taken a while to find a way to phrase it.

"Because it is easier to keep people on a predetermined path if you map it out in front of them. Tell them what you think is good by giving them something that is bad in contrast, and the majority will let it guide them according to your very wish. That is how politics work, and as despicable as it is, the school is a political issue no matter what the headmaster says. Also, the dunderheads we teach couldn't deal with such a responsibility."

"That doesn't sound like an answer a professor would normally give." Robin smiled in amusement at his last comment.

"Your questions aren't something a student would normally ask." He returned with a shrug and an expression that made Robin chuckle.

"I guess you're right about that. And I do see your point. Thanks for the honest answer." She sighed and felt like he was probably right. What is taught and what isn't was all politics… and that meant it didn't always make sense. Huh, what a sad end for her private studies of the mysterious dark arts.

"Of course I'm honest with you, there would be no point in anything else."

"So… what issue did you want to talk about?" Robin inquired a few seconds later and tried not to showcase her curiosity all too much.

"There have been rumors for a while now…" He started, and Robin grew nervous immediately. Rumors were always bad, and somehow she always seemed to be entirely oblivious to them. Most of them at least.

"If it's that one that I failed transfiguration, that is entirely made up! I got an 'Exceeds Expectations' on this year's exam, and McGonagall was merely making a joke when she said she would give me a 'Dreadful' if I kept going over the maximum essay length!" Robin blurted out before Snape even had a chance to continue with what he meant to say.

"That is a rumor I have been entirely unaware of, but seeing as I know of your grades, it is also entirely irrelevant." He replied with a doubtful expression. "Is that the only rumor you have heard of?"

"Well, yeah…" Robin shrugged and looked down at her table as she bit her bottom lip. "Recently, yes." Maybe she shouldn't be so exclusively concerned about her own issues and actually start taking notice of the real world more often.

"There has been talk for a good two weeks about an unofficial end of term celebration. A party, hosted by a group of sixth years for the entire house and whoever is invited. Obviously the professors are not to know of this happening, but I like to pay attention to the ongoings within the student community. You don't happen to know anything more about the issue, do you?" His eyebrows rose in question, and for some reason Robin felt as if he seriously expected her to know what he was talking about.

A Slytherin party everyone was invited to… well, everyone except for Robin as it seemed. She didn't usually care about these things, but somehow it hurt a little nonetheless that absolutely nobody had bothered inviting her. Did her roommates know about this? Or were the first years generally excluded? She had absolutely no idea, she hadn't even heard of it at all. Hell, even Snape knew more about it than she did! A burning shame with a hollowing tail of pathetic sadness crept from the pit of her stomach up to her heart and wrapped it in a veil of unwanted shadows.

"I… didn't even know there was a party at all. This is the first time I hear about it." She finally managed to reply, but her voice was way too quiet for her own liking. Really, this shouldn't even be bothering her! "I would tell you if I knew anything about it, I promise. I'm sorry…"

For a moment, Snape actually looked fairly uncomfortable upon her words, and Robin wondered if she had said anything stupid yet again. But she had no idea what it could be, and therefore she simply looked down at her book in silence. She would like to help him, really… but there was little she could do now.

"Do you even speak to the people in your year at all?" He asked after a moment, honestly inquiring rather than scolding her.

"I do talk to Theresa usually…" Robin shrugged. "Only about class issues though. Some other people outside of my own house too. But the only students in Slytherins I talk to are Cas and Jorien, and while they're both extraordinarily bright and truly lovely girls, they're far from being familiars to me. Maybe they know more about the party than I do though. I could ask them, if you would like."

"There will be no need for that. I was hoping you knew about it, but otherwise I have no intention to intervene."

"You don't?" Robin looked up with a frown. "But aren't they breaking a bunch of rules?"

"I would assume so. However as long as they stay within the castle and do not wander… I usually ignore occurrences like this."

"Why?"

"Because there isn't even half a week of term left, and I would rather spend that in peace and quiet than with fifty students in detention. As long as they do not cause or suffer any harm, I let them proceed and get it over with."

"Then why did you ask me about it in the first place?"

"I was wondering what kept you from attending, seeing as you still were here and not on your way. And I was curious about the specifics of the event, which I unfortunately have not had the luck to overhear."

"Even if I had known about this stupid party, I probably wouldn't have gone anyway." Robin shrugged with a badly feigned indifference. "I'm no fan of those events, nor would I have been appreciated there as it seems."

"Then why does it upset you that you were previously unaware of it?"

"I'm not upset." Robin shot right back, but upon his 'who are you kidding' expression, she rolled her eyes and gave a truthful response. "I mean… yes, I'm inattentive to these things sometimes, as I don't particularly care about the students' world, but if even the professors know about this stupid party… I just can't imagine that I merely missed the talk about it, which obviously has been going on if you could overhear it. Which in return means that I was intentionally excluded. That's just… I don't know. I shouldn't be upset about it, I don't even like these people. It's unreasonable to be sad about it."

"Emotions usually are unreasonable." He mused in return and Robin found herself nodding on instinct. Emotions are unreasonable, but they are an unavoidable pain in the butt nonetheless.

"So… that party is tonight?" Robin asked then, for she didn't know what else to say.

"It should be happening right now, however I am unaware of the specific location. You are intelligent though, certainly you could find out where it takes place."

"Oh, I wasn't asking because of that. I know when I'm not welcome. And as I said, I don't care about parties. Or crowds. Or other people. I'm quite happy with the company I have." She stated and hoped that it wouldn't make him uncomfortable again, but he just listened to her words with the usual undivided attention, which brought a small smile to Robin's lips as she added, "The only thing I miss is the-..."

"Music?"

"Yes!" Her smile widened to a visible degree where it reached her eyes as well. "How did you know?"

He didn't reply, and only kept looking at Robin for a moment in silence accompanied by an expression of contemplation. Finally he turned away, and stood up. "Come on."

"Where are we going?" Robin frowned as she complied though and followed Snape out of the classroom, which he locked behind them before heading down the hallway.

"You will see." Was the only and very much cryptic reply he gave, and somehow Robin didn't feel as much nervous about the situation as purely excited. She didn't bother hiding her smirk, and only ignored the renewing waves of pleasant tingles on her skin as she followed him up the stairs and through the empty castle.

They passed by any location Robin could've imagined Snape to lead her to, and only moved from one story up to the next until they arrived on the seventh floor. What the hell was he up to? Robin didn't have an inkling, and only grew even more confused when he told her to stay standing in the middle of a random crossing of hallways. But she obeyed without questioning him (he wouldn't have given an answer anyway) and stood frozen to the spot as she watched with a humored frown on her face how he paced up and down the hallway in front of her. Upon her chuckles however, she received a small glare that made her bite the insides of her cheeks to keep from straight out laughing. Whatever he was doing, it was both irritating and amusing.

Both sentiments faded from Robin's mind in a moment's notice however once a large door started materializing in the very wall she stood facing. It was almost as large as the one leading to the great hall, but undoubtedly more ornamented, and Robin's lips parted as she stared at the unusual occurrence in awe.

"After you." He said in manner that for him was unusually smug, and Robin's heart skipped a beat as she moved to open the door indeed.

What lay beyond it was undoubtedly the most peculiar and yet the most fascinating thing she had ever seen. A room larger than she could fathom currently, larger than she ever would've imagined to be found inside this castle, filled with mountains upon mountains of various objects stacked upon each other in complete randomness. The things found in here were absolutely overwhelming in their incredible amount and diversity, and Robin didn't even know where to look first as she stood helplessly frozen in the doorway. It was rather overwhelming indeed.

"Welcome to the room of requirement, or in this instance, the room of hidden things." Snape said in a more quiet tone now, as he steered Robin further into the room by her shoulders so that he could close the door behind them.

"What on earth is this?" Robin wondered as she let her eyes travel over the mountains of objects. There was one of everything in existence in here, she was absolutely sure of that. Maybe she was just dreaming all of this. She didn't care to wake up though.

"A mystery, and a secret. The room of requirement is a peculiar piece of magic, as it turns into whatever someone needs the most in the instant. It can be made to appear in the way you just witnessed, by having a clear picture of what it is one needs in mind. The room of hidden things is one of the countless forms the room of requirement can take on, and it has been used to hide and store any kind of thing for centuries."

"It's absolutely incredible, it's…" Robin replied quietly, too awestruck to even bother hiding the sentiment, and finally unfroze enough to saunter through the mountains of things. "Something so entirely impossible that it just has to exist."

"Indeed. It is almost impossible to find by accident, and the vast majority of people is unaware of the existence of this room in the first place. I would like for it to remain that way."

"I won't lose a word about it. I promise." Robin finally could tear her eyes off the room to look at Snape once more. "Why did you bring me here though? If it's such a secret, why take the risk?"

"You are no risk, I am well aware of that." He replied easily, and Robin felt an immediate sense of pride in that. "I brought you here because in a place where there is everything, there is always what you are looking for."

Before Robin could ask what exactly he meant by that, he spoke a few more muttered words and then the deep silence of the huge hall was replaced by a crackle, and finally by the sound of music. Robin looked around to find a possible origin of it, but the source remained hidden from her sight. The sound alone sufficed to brighten her smile though, and she closed her eyes to simply listen in contentment. It had been so long since she had gotten to enjoy music without the disturbing sounds of people talking or dancing or moving… and music at Hogwarts generally was scarce anyway. So now, for a long while, she simply stood there in between the mountains of fascinating things with her eyes closed and let the sound wrap around her senses. She breathed in the music like the cold air of the night that didn't exist in here, for time wasn't a dimension of relevance in this place. Everything about this room was timeless, ancient and modern at once, and Robin felt like she had entered a different reality beyond the limits of imagination. An impossible reality indeed.

It was one of those rare moments where she felt flooded and filled up by an infinite number of highly intense emotions that blended together like colors to form a blinding white light. A moment where an unimaginable intensity of feeling didn't cause her to implode into darkness but to explode into blissful light. A moment she wouldn't forget. At last she opened her eyes again, and found that Snape was looking at her with a doubtful expression yet again.

"What?" She asked with a smile, frowning at him in return.

"Are you alright?"

"Are you concerned?"

"Yes."

"Wow… good to know that me being happy is such a scary sight." Robin let out a laugh she couldn't help and shook her head to herself. "Sorry, sarcasm isn't an appropriate answer to honesty. I'm very alright, actually. As close to perfect as I could be, I believe. Thank you for that."

"Get over it already, will you... It was merely music and a dusty old room, hardly something to be so very delighted about."

"You cannot seriously deny that you did something nice by bringing me here. It's not even possible to deny!" Robin laughed again and didn't even care if he scolded her for it.

"I can try." He replied with a glare and a scowl, and Robin smiled to herself as she looked down at the ground in a defeat as feigned as his distaste. Maybe she should help him with the trying.

"So, if you didn't bring me here to be nice, what did you hope to find in here then? Maybe I could help looking for it." She suggested with an innocent smile she actually could convey for once, even if only due to the fact that she would seriously love to have a look around.

"I shall see to that myself. Go ahead and look around if you wish to though, but I ask you to be careful and not to touch anything. Many of the objects in here are more harmful than they look."

"Well, if something happens to me, you could just leave my body in here and nobody will ever find it. Problem solved." Robin shrugged with a nonchalant expression, but a smirk came onto her lips nonetheless as Snape rolled his eyes in return.

"If you keep sassing me, I might actually consider that." He replied and turned to walk off without another glance, and Robin's jaw dropped in sheer amusement. Then, with the biggest grin on her face, she went to take a look around at last.

… … …

It was after almost an hour of searching through stuff by herself that Robin found something that made her stop and stare. Not because it was particularly noticeable or interesting in itself, but because it existed in the first place. That was odd enough to give Robin some serious chills. Maybe she should tell Snape about it… or better yet, show him. Because nobody would believe it otherwise.

"Uh, professor?" She called into the open room in the hopes that he would hear her, wherever he might be. "I… found something you should take a look at."

"Is it urgent or merely interesting?" He asked from somewhere off to the left, and Robin thought for a second.

"Well, urgent is the wrong word, but I don't think I want to leave this room without you seeing this. It's… remarkable." She finally replied with an insecure frown to herself, and at the object in question.

"Could you be even more imprecise than that?" He sounded annoyed, but was getting closer at least.

"It's no threat, if that's what you mean. Just… eerie." She finished the statement in a tone too quiet to be heard far, but a mere few seconds later he was standing next to her already.

"Now, what is so remarkable that I needed to see it?" He sighed with a look at Robin instead of the pile she stood in front of, but his eyes followed her line of sight even before she could answer his question and he froze at the sight just like Robin had. "That… is remarkable indeed."

"Told you so." She replied before she could decide better not to, but he let it slip anyway.

What they were both looking at now was a large, framed, but unmoving portrait. A portrait of a young woman who looked exactly like Robin, only perhaps a few years older. But the similarity was undeniable.

"Did you touch it?"

"Of course not!" Robin protested immediately. "I actually do take advice when I deem it useful!"

"Did anything else happen that might be considered unusual?"

"No… I was just looking at all the things, and then I saw this. Nothing moved, or glowed, or changed or whatever it could have done. A perfectly ordinary painting." She shrugged and finally averted her eyes from the image.

"Perhaps it is only a coincidence. Over the course of the centuries there surely have been a few people who look like you." He tried to reason, but also didn't sound too convinced about what he was saying.

"That would explain the similarity between her and me. But then how do you explain this?" Robin asked quietly, and pulled her necklace with the locket on it over the collar of her shirt into the open. "Look what she's wearing around her neck… A different necklace, admittedly, but the locket is the very same as mine."

For another two seconds he inspected the painting, then stepped so close to Robin that he could take the small piece of jewelry out of her hand and study it with the same intense gaze. Bloody hell… she would've taken the necklace off if he had just given her a moment longer to do so. Instead, he now stood so close that every single sense of hers was heightened to the unbearable. Hopefully he couldn't hear the ridiculous pace of her heart as it almost leapt out of her chest with every beat… if he did, she might just have to blame it on her scary similarity to the painting.

Somehow, the more she tried to ignore these things, the feelings and tingles and thoughts, the stronger they came lashing back at her in the end. It really was unfair. She didn't want to like him so much… and she didn't want to enjoy it. Hopefully this stupid teenage-crush thing would be over soon; she's had enough after a full year of repressing it.

"You have had this for a while, haven't you?" He finally spoke up again before he looked Robin in the eye for a few silent seconds, then dropped the locket and took a few steps backwards.

"What?" Robin's mind was in a minor haze, and she needed a second to remember how to breathe. Gods, this was ridiculous. It was torture and bliss at the same time. Maybe she could blame it on hormones, or something likely unlikely.

"The locket has been in your possession for how long?" He repeated, but without the feigned annoyance Robin had expected.

"I… bought it in an antiquity shop in Diagon Alley during the Christmas break of my first year here. That would be three and a half years ago." She finally got her brain to work again, and shook the unnecessary feelings out of her otherwise functioning system.

"And you have been wearing it ever since?"

"Yes."

"Anything unusual?"

"No. Not at all. I put the same charm on it as on my backpack though, but it has never caused me any problems." Robin shrugged with a calm expression. "Do you think this portrait is anything more than just a big coincidence?"

"I have no idea. But I have seen coincidences far stranger than this one, so it is very much possible that it is nothing more."

"I mean… last year, when we made that potion to see which spells had affected me, there was no influence of another kind on me other than that prank thing, right? So this shouldn't be affecting me, seeing as I've had the locket for far longer than that."

"I hadn't considered that, but I do agree. Perhaps it is merely a coincidence. Still, I-..."

"You expect me to tell you immediately when or if something odd occurs." Robin added before he could.

"Indeed." He replied with a small glare in return, but Robin didn't let it fool her at all as they left the portrait where it was and made their way back towards the doorway back into the real world.

"Did you find what you were looking for, by the way? The reason we came here?" She asked with a new smile, looking up at Snape once they stepped through the doors and into the dark hallway.

For a moment he simply returned her gaze in silence, giving her one of those enigmatic looks that said everything and nothing at once, until he finally replied with words once they started making their way back towards the dungeons. "Yes, I believe I did."

And yet, he hadn't taken a single thing out of the room he hadn't brought there himself in the first place; it was only Robin, and the very smile on her lips.

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[upthenorthmountain]

Heartwood - Chapter 2

Chapter 1

I need to make a fic page, will try and do that today, but do I want to draw a picture? Hmm

Anyway here’s chapter two!

Chapter 2

No one noticed when Anna got home, and no one noticed that she didn’t eat any dinner. She went up to her bare, sterile room and she lay on the bed, looking at the ceiling. If anyone came in they would only see my head and my hair, she thought, all in white as I am, on these white sheets. She looked down at herself and pulled her hands up into her sleeves. If I were to die right now then they would just have to carry me out, straighten the counterpane, and everything in the world would keep going the same as it always has. They’d have to tell Elsa, of course, otherwise she might not realise I wasn’t here any more.

A year. One more summer, one more autumn, one more winter, then maybe a slice of spring. And that was all.

She wondered what would happen when she told Elsa.

She’d drag her back to the doctor, that’s what would happen. She’d ask a thousand questions, and she’d insist on that referral, and they’d go to the city; and there would be so many doctors, and so many more white rooms like this one. Anna would be poked and prodded and half her blood would be run through machines; and they’d cut her open and poke around in there as well, and post her into MRI machines and goodness knew what. A year to live, and that’s how she’d spend it.

Maybe...maybe she didn’t have to tell Elsa straight away.

Maybe she didn’t have to tell her at all.

Anna slept very little that night. By the time the sun finally rose, the sunrise filling the white room with some colour for once, she’d made up her mind. On the stroke of 9am, she rang the doctor’s office, and said she’d like to cancel her appointment for next week, please. No, she didn’t want to reschedule. Yes, she’d call back if she changed her mind. Thank you.

And then she went out. It seemed like a good day to buy a red dress.

-----

The dress was perfect. It was a rich, deep, cranberry red; it was fitted at the top with a skirt that swirled beautifully; it showed a little more cleavage than Anna was used to, but still fairly respectable - other people she knew showed a lot more, certainly. None of her shoes went with it, of course. It needed sparkly shoes. Fortunately, the shop sold those too, and a matching necklace.

Anna’s daring didn’t quite extend to wearing the dress at home. She quailed a little at Elsa seeing it, and wasn’t sure she wouldn’t end up changing, and then when she got home the dress - and shoes, and necklace - would have disappeared. But she had a charity tea this afternoon, and her outfit was perfectly appropriate. Elsa wouldn’t be there, and no one else would think anything of it.

She changed quickly in the Ladies in the reception of the hotel, and on a whim, brushed her hair down too. Her hair waved naturally, and usually had to be pulled back to keep it neat - but today she didn’t feel like looking neat. She pinned a little of it back from her face and peered at herself in the mirror. She hadn’t brought any make-up, and her freckles were showing something awful - but nothing she could do about it now.

The tea was taking place in the main ballroom. Anna gave her ticket to the staff member at the door, took a deep breath, and went in.

-----

She did get a few odd glances. She suspected a few acquaintances didn’t recognise her immediately. Anna took a drink and said a few hellos, then she stood to one side and looked around.

It suddenly struck her how pointless this all was. No one wants to be here, she thought. They’d all rather be at home or on the golf course or conducting their tedious extra-marital affairs, but it’s for charity so here they are. Imagine how much better the charity would do if they all just donated the same amount but no one had to book the room or buy the drink or arrange for the tiny food. Anna snagged what she suspected was some kind of deconstructed cucumber sandwich from a tray. It was actually quite good. If this is an afternoon tea, though, surely there should be cake?

She took another miniscule sandwich and wandered over to the staff member who seemed to be overseeing the waiting staff. “Excuse me,” she asked him, “Is there any cake?”

“Cake?”

“Mm. It’s not a criticism, I was just wondering. These are very good, by the way.”

“Thank you. There will be a selection of fancy cakes and meringues served after the speech from the charity representative.”

“Oh, okay. Thank you.” Anna paused. Did she want to listen to a speech? Was that really how she wanted to spend her hours on Earth, that were apparently very precious?

“D’you think I could get a cake to go?” she said. “I have to leave now. Medical reasons.”

The man hesitated, then he shrugged and disappeared towards the kitchen. Anna surveyed the room again - there was no one here she actually, actively wanted to talk to - and thought about what she could do instead. She could go anywhere. The thought was thrilling but also a little terrifying.

She remembered meeting Mrs Davies yesterday. Mrs Davies - Lillian - had been her Science teacher, back when she had gone to the local secondary school (her father hadn’t really approved of private education, he thought it gave the wrong mindset. Her sister did approve of it, or maybe she just approved of paying money to make Anna someone else’s problem, so she’d done her A-levels at a boarding school where she’d known no one and no one wanted to be friends with the girl who cried all the time). Mrs Davies - Lillian - had been an excellent teacher, friendly and enthusiastic and full of a passion for Science and nature. Anna was not at all surprised to find her spending her retirement engaging in a little light environmental protest. She’d also been Anna’s Girl Guide leader, and taken her camping a couple of times when she was twelve or thirteen. Oh, she’d love to see her again, and have a proper chat.

She knew exactly where Bennett’s Field was. She remembered, when she was a little girl, walking down there with her father. The footpath ran down the side of the field, and then skirted the edge of the woods. You had to stay on the footpath as far as the old oak tree, because the land on either side belonged to someone else, but the corner of the field and a small patch of the woods belonged to her father.

The memory stopped her short. Yes. It belonged to him. At some point when the farmland had been chopped up and parts of it sold, a small amount of the field and a corner of the woods had been bundled in with some other land her father had bought to develop. She thought so, anyway. She couldn’t see how it would have been sold, unless the developers of the field had bought it - there was no reason anyone would have told Anna about that.

She ducked out of the room and leant against the corridor wall. Imagine if it was still theirs - she would gladly, happily let the protestors stay on their corner of the field, make whatever observations they needed to in their corner of the woods. How did she find out? 

Anna knew where her lawyer’s office was. She’d heard her parents’ wills being read there, and she’d been there on a handful of other occasions since she came of age, to sign odd documents and make her own will at Elsa’s insistence. It was only four’o’clock. She ran down outside and found a taxi.

-----

Mr Owens was very obliging, and agreed to see her, despite the short notice. Anna suspected he might have some sympathies with the bats; very soon the pair of them were looking at the map, and Anna was thrilled to see that she was correct.

“I think someone used to live there, many years ago,” Mr Owens said. “Although there’s no building there now, and you’d never get planning permission - the only access is along the public footpath, no utilities. So it’s not worth anything.”

“I don’t want to live there,” Anna said, though she did, a little. “But I could camp there if I wanted, couldn’t I?”

“Yes, of course.”

“With some friends, maybe.”

“If you liked. Of course, if the wood does become a Site of Special Scientific Interest, that would affect you, too.”

“That would be alright.” Anna traced the outline of the little patch of land on the map. “And if they build on the rest of the field?”

“Then they might give you access, but maybe not. They tried to buy this land, as you know,” he said.

“I didn’t, no.”

“Your sister didn’t tell you? They weren’t willing to pay what she was asking. To be quite honest, I advised her to take whatever she could get, they were the only people who might have given you anything for it. Like I said, it’s worthless.”

“Unless you’re a bat,” Anna said absently. Had Elsa been being greedy, or had she just not wanted to sell?

“Well, I suppose that’s true.”

“Can I have a copy of this map, please?”

“You can take that one, if you like. Was there anything else?”

“No, that was all. Thank you so much for seeing me.”

“No problem at all, Miss Rendell. I’m glad I could help.”

-----

“I might go away for a few days,” Anna announced over breakfast the next morning.

Elsa looked up from her paper. “Really?” she said. 

“Mmhm.”

“To where? With whom?”

“Um, you know I used to be in Guides? My old Guide leader invited me to go camping with her and some friends.” Anna buttered her toast without looking up. “I’ll have to get some camping things but there’s that shop on the retail park, isn’t there? I’ll run over there this morning.”

“Camping?” Elsa looked horrified. “Why would you want to do that?”

Anna shrugged. “Felt like it. You won’t even notice I’m gone.”

Elsa pulled a face. “I don’t think you’ll enjoy that at all, Anna. Camping! In a tent?”

“If I remember right, that’s how it goes.” Anna looked up. “If I don’t like it, I’ll come back. It’s not far.”

“How long for?”

“I don’t know. I’ll have my phone.”

“And where will you charge it?”

“I’ll get a solar charger.”

“And where exactly are you going?”

“Um. Bennett’s Field.”

Elsa dropped her paper. “Not that - Anna! You know they’re squatting illegally. That’s not camping, it’s a protest. What will you do if the police get involved?”

“Mm. But, if they moved over a bit to the north - and I was there - it wouldn’t be illegal, as such, would it.”

Elsa was quiet for a while, watching her sister’s face. Then she said, “I didn’t know you knew about that land.”

“Dad told me.  A long time ago.”

“You don’t have to actually stay with them. You could just give them permission, if that’s what you want. And stay here.”

“I think I’d like to go, thanks.”

Elsa looked at her again, for a long moment, then she picked up her newspaper. “As you wish.”

Anna took a big bite of her toast. That had been easier than she expected.

[mindctrlaltdel]

Random Reviews: Mulholland Drive

This movie is BASIC INSTINCT, written and directed by Salvador Dali.

***

Recently, I watched MULHOLLAND DRIVE for the first time for my friend Shawn Eastridge's podcast, MISSING FRAMES (www.thenerdparty.com/missingframes/episode-103-mulholland-drive).

As I watched this odd, funny, disturbing, interesting flick, I took the following notes. Is it, as some critics say, the BEST FILM OF THE 21ST CENTURY? Here's an inside look at my viewing experience as I mulled over MULHOLLAND DRIVE...

[PRESS PLAY]

I love how the first five minutes is basically a bad late 90's Gap commercial, all swing dancing, no point...

The Mulholland Drive sign is calling to us. The street, Mulholland Drive, is Bali Hai for perverts.

Justin Theroux gets top billing over Naomi Watts??

I gotta admit, I saw one of the movie's original posters and thought "Naomi Watts AND the lady from the first MEN IN BLACK is in this? It's the triumphant return of Linda Fiorentino." When I DIDN'T see her name in the opening credits, I was disappointed. She's NO Linda Fiorentino... for this role, she's even better. AND she's a countess (seriously, look it up). Oh, and Robert Forster shows up for 10 minutes.

Not-Linda Fiorentino has some hustle in her for someone who just survived a horrible head on collision.

I like how the street signs kind of tell us where we are and what kind of world we're in. It's like a surreal, dramatic version of that Californians SNL sketch.

You mean to tell me that the red-headed older woman didn't see not-Linda Fiorentino under her kitchen table? UnbeLIEVable.

Holy crap, the wide-eyed guy in Winky's - he plays Jimmy Barrett, the comedian in MAD MEN... and MAD MEN is an interesting connection here, because everyone talks in this measured, paced deliberate way throughout that series, kind of similar to how the characters usually speak in the David Lynch productions I've seen... When I started watching MAD MEN, I thought the actors were purposely directed to speak that way, so everything to seem more "real" as opposed to that fast-talking, old-Hollywood style that you'd expect to see from outspoken, big idea-types. I imagined that Matt Weiner wanted people to seem - at least to modern audiences - the way people actually were - particularly, the inhabitants of the intelligent and cerebral world of ad men, working behind the scenes, on the fringes of show business. But then Jimmy Barrett, an old-timey comedian ALSO spoke that way. And it just didn't seem authentic to me. Anyway, back to THIS movie...

OH and that dingy woman behind the dumpster! She's like if Captain Howdy moved out West and got all LA on us. Is that Cloris Leachman covered in mud? And the music... for some reason, there's nothing scarier than the sound of an HVAC vent on full blast. (According to this article, www.vulture.com/2014/10/mulholland-drives-evil-hobo-breaks-her-silencio.html,the actress who played Evil Hobo #1 said of her audition process: "I don’t mean to brag, but David Lynch said he was looking for the most incredible face he could find. I actually met him at a Twin Peaks party, and he was like, 'Look at that face!'")

I love the X-Files-style synth strings that play over Naomi Watts (Betty) and gram-gram (Irene) as they walk through the hotel, I mean the airport... Aw, these two old people love Betty. What a different life she's living than that countess who's not Linda Fiorentino who's squatting in that redhead's apartment that Betty's about to move into.

Even then, Naomi had a good American accent. (Although I learned she's technically British but split her time between England and Australia), those Australians are great at spitting out neutral American sounds. But once I learned that Betty is supposed to be Canadian, I was very disappointed. It's not THAT authentic. Where are her "Aboots"? And she didn't put maple syrup on anything in this whole movie.

Oh my God, are Irene and her husband, riding in this towncar, ALSO going to get held up, like not-Linda Fiorentino at the beginning of the movie? Oh okay, they're not. We just followed them for no reason other than to see that they look happier than an old couple in a Cialis commercial. I guess meeting Betty really improved their sex life or something.

Coco - of course she's a fading hollywood starlet... AHHH, Coco is played by Ann Miller - good for her. She's basically that kooky old landlady from SEINFELD, the one who worked with the Three Stooges that Kramer met when he went to LA. Look at all these connections!

"Prize-fighting kangaroo who shits all over the courtyard" - do you think Naomi Watts is going to come out and say, "as an Australian, I was actually offended by this line, but I was scared into silence by that power-hungry monster, David Lynch."

The countess - who now goes by "Rita" - does kind of look like Rita Hayworth. I like the connections to old Hollywood and to noirs and how it's all wrapped together. Rita Hayworth is also a redhead, like Betty's aunt. She's of Spanish descent as well... and the actress playing Rita in this movie is of Mexican descent... Connections, connections.

I love that this casting session is basically run by a deep state shadow organization with a weird waiter in a red blazer... This is how Disney cast WandaVision.

HAHAHAH "That is one of the finest espressos in the world sir!" - this is DEFINITELY how Disney casts their movies. And Justin Theroux is the only man with integrity in this room! Does anyone have any class in this town!? They don't even validate his parking.

This is my favorite movie about making movies since BOWFINGER. And I may not be lying. And somehow less weird than THE ARTIST.

Is everyone gonna start killing each other over Ed's famous black book? This is oddly funny.

"Something bit me bad!" This incredibly long fight scene between the blond guy and secretary... it reminds me of the Uma Thurman/Daryl Hannah trailer fight in KILL BILL VOL. 2 but with less snakes.

These closeups of lingering looks on Rita's cash-filled purse are great... She's pulling wads of cash out of that purse one at a time, like Leslie Nielsen pulling eggs out of that blond lady in AIRPLANE!

I want to know what direction David Lynch gave that braless woman who's following the blond assassin around. It's like she's doing an acting exercise... like you know, when you're told to fill the space... "walk around the room, and clear your head. And now you're walking really fast. And now you're slow. NOW, imagine what it would be like to walk with your nose as the furthest point in front of you. Lead with your nose..." And David Lynch did that and told the braless woman to lead with her chest.

Justin Theroux is basically Robert Downey Jr.'s character from BOWFINGER, except NOW, he's the protagonist.

Betty is loving Rita's amnesia a bit too much. If this were my life, Rita would be the most interesting thing to happen to me too. Hell, if I was from Ontario, getting off at LAX would rock my world.

When Justin Theroux enters his glass-walled home to find his wife with another man, well... Justin Theroux may never star in something like HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN, but I can definitely picture him in YUPPIE WITH A GOLF CLUB.

That slinky theme song playing in Justin Theroux's/Laraine's house is a song that I actually listen to in my tiki, lounge playlist - to give you a hint of my music tastes. What I listen to for fun, Billy Ray Cyrus puts on to drown out his love-making.

By the way, BILLY RAY CYRUS!!! WHAT? Is this how Miley was conceived??? I think yes.

Pink paint in a jewelry box! This is much better than the usual throwing-all-his-belongings-out-a-second-story-apartment-window-scene that happens in every other movie.

I wouldn't be THAT excited if I learned MY name was Diane Selwin. BUT the sexxxual tension with the waitress Diane at the diner is palpable!

So, not-Linda Fiorentino has amnesia. How does she know that answering machine is NOT her voice!?

Justin Theroux/Adam Kesher's wife is very aggressive with the large man who's so dedicated to finding Adam Kesher that he keeps calling Adam's name in vain like the secretary in my doctor's office.

I watched this movie in pieces, the first half late at night. The second half the next morning. In between, while sleeping, I had a dream where Betty and Rita were looking over a map and any time one of their hands brushed over another, their hands would turn gold. As if this was a stylistic choice made by the filmmaker directing my dream to show that there's some kind of deeper relationship between these two women. So I've started dreaming in Lynch.

I like how this film is so utterly connected to not only Lynch's subconscious, but the audience's as well. Lynch is TAPPED IN. I don't always love when a film goes all in with a surreal style, because sometimes that's just a cover for something lacking in the storytelling department. But I do feel there's more to it here, in MULHOLLAND DRIVE.

The hooded woman, Louise... I feel like I've run into her on the streets of New York. A Louise will ALWAYS find a way to give you a portent of doom that ruins your day. Friggin’ Louise.

This movie is so moody, you really have to be in the mood to watch it.

There's something magical and prophetic about the cowboy, like he's the seer that the old general sees on the eve of battle... Also, I love how the lead female role in Justin Theroux's movie is his sword of destiny. There's a glitz and gleam and nostalgia to Old Hollywood that naturally gives this movie, set in "modern" Hollywood," a total fantasy vibe.

Hahaha that "You're still here?" scene rehearsal between Betty and Rita is an excellent transition.

James Karen - the real estate guy from POLTERGEIST - is handling casting! "He moved the headshots but he didn't cast the bodies!!"

The casting direction: "Don't play it for real until it gets real." It's interesting how the characters, who work in the "business," seem to control their reality. Betty seems unsure of where the scene is going, then she gets into it. And it really speaks to her conversion from a bright-eyed new arrival to someone who surrenders to the darker impulses of the city.

HEAVY BREATHING.

Ugh friggin' Bob...

I love how Lynnie, the casting director, pulls the rug out from under that scene. There's always a jaded casting person who totally wrecks any good feelings about every audition. It's a thing.

David Lynch uses nostalgia and a latent love for Hollywood to draw the characters (and us) into his world and then subverts our expectations. A lot.

Why is the screen test just a lip-synching contest? ...I think it feeds into the nostalgia element for the movie at large but it seems like a waste of studio resources here. Early-aughties Hollywood spending, amirite?

Rita's reaction to finding the body is played very much like the reaction a character would have in an older film... The horror! The fear! The silent gaping terror while possessed with the inability to scream. I was watching the original KING KONG before this (which is may be a sign from the universe that I had to watch this Naomi Watts vehicle, as she starred in the remake), and specifically remember the scene where the director Carl Denham is coaching Ann Darrow/Fay Wray on how to act in a horror film - "now look up, and you see it, you see it in all its horror. And your jaw drops and you try to scream but you're so frozen in terror that you can't!" - I imagine that's what Lynch is doing to not-Linda Fiorentino off-camera as they filmed this scene.

Uh-oh, Rita is single-white femal'ing Betty now... She doesn't have a personality of her own, so she's going to take Betty's.... And now we're just getting NUDE with each other. This erotic thriller immediately turned from skintillating to Skinemax.

"I'm in love with you" - is Betty just saying that to convince herself? It feels more lusty than real. Betty's so bright-eyed and bushy tailed. Rita is gonna chew her up and spit her out!

I like the shot when they're sleeping together and, as they rest, their faces overlap thanks to the perspective of the framing. How much of the same person are they becoming? Where does one personality start and the other end?

The weird 2am theater. How'd Rita and Betty find this place? I love how this pop-up slam-poetry reading in this opera house is as terrifying to Rita and Betty as finding the dead body.

So Betty starts convulsing in her seat and then the poet disappears in a kind of old-style, cinematic I'm disappearing effect. I dig it.

Wait... is this a mysterious, magical show that just appears in LA, like Hamunaptra, the City of the Dead, that town in THE MUMMY that only shows up at sunrise on the third day or something like that? Or is this just a poorly attended Spanish-language talent show that could only afford to book this theater at 2am on a Thursday?

I love that Betty and Rita are tearing up over Rebekah Del Rio's performance (Rebekah Del Rio is a real person, by the way). Then, Rebekah faints as her voice keeps singing - is NOTHING real? Has Betty totally given into this weird world to the point that she doesn't really know what's authentic and what's fake anymore OR was Betty fake before she got to LA so it was easy for her to get acclimated.

This movie is like THE MATRIX, from the perspective of characters who only took the blue pill and didn't look back.

OOOH, Betty has the box and Rita has the key! But the box is empty except maybe its the Gom Jabbar pain-box from DUNE. Is David Lynch using MULHOLLAND DRIVE as an excuse to make good on his promise to produce a good version of DUNE.

WAIT A SECOND, the cowboy knows the dead girl? Does this even matter?

Now, wait ANOTHER second. Is Betty performing or DREAMING when she's Diane or is something else going one??

What's the BLUE KEY doing there?

"Two Detectives"??? Is she talking about Betty and Rita OR Robert Forster and the pudgy guy? OR someone else entirely - the two guy's from Winky's???

The movie became more interesting the moment the perspective shifted to "Diane" and "Camilla." When that happened, Naomi Watts really amped up her performance... reaching a level of intensity we hadn't seen since Betty's audition... it does take 2 hours to reach that point.... But then, when Betty and Rita are topless on the couch, I couldn't tell who they were supposed to be until Rita/Camilla called her "Diane."

Wait, now Rita's acting?? OH, so Rita was an actress? And Diane wasn't? Or Betty looks exactly like Diane?

The weird shifts in focus. The sad masturbating. This is the most depressing soft-core ever made!

Did Betty get killed and have amnesia too?

They take a shortcut to Eddie's house which looks EXACTLY like where Rita/Camilla was taken at the beginning of the movie by the hitmen in the towncar before that wild accident with those teenagers made her life weirder... OR less weird. You be the judge.

IS this a flashback or the future. Eddie and Camilla are having an affair?

MY MOTHER? COCO - what's real and what isn't????

The jitterbug competition.... Diane/Naomi wanted the lead so bad, Camilla got the part but in Mulholland Drive, Naomi is the star.

Then, Camilla is kissing that other blond actress who Betty watched screen test...

MULHOLLAND DRIVE is just David Lynch telling us that LA is a place for lust and jealousy and no matter what, purity gets ruined.

WHAT, the blond waitress is BETTY? And Diane hires the blond guy, who's officially labeled as a hitman.

Diane is also from Canada...

Are Diane and Betty just different versions of the same people in nearby parallel universes? I certainly HOPE so. This is too much insanity for ONE universe to handle.

The blue key will be found where the blond guy told Diane. Okay, that makes sense. But if this were to mirror real life, the key was in her hand the WHOLE time!

OH, and hobo-Cloris Leachman comes back... AND she's holding the blue box/Gom Jabbar... WHY the hell did those two old people wander out of that paper bag??? Do they represent longstanding guilt? Seems like it. Because they've just crept into Diane's apartment.

MULHOLLAND DRIVE is almost silly to the point of pretentiousness at points - at least with the last word to be uttered on screen - "silencio." That said, it does evoke the HAMLET line: "And the rest is silence," so THAT's poetic.

Sadly, Robert Forster was barely in this movie...

Oh, and Lee Grant played Louise - the old-Hollywood connections keep coming!

I can't believe this movie was intended to be a pilot?

***

Now, some final notes:

On the swapping of characters and relationships in the last 30 minutes -- my first thought was that Betty/Diane and Rita/Camilla look similar and/or they're connected by a parallel universe, and the diner is like the central hub between worlds, and hobo-Cloris Leachman is the gatekeeper between the two worlds... I buy the "dream world" explanation that some critics espouse, that's something I considered myself as I watched. But I'm not sure I believed Betty is Diane's dream version of herself. Also, I think David Lynch has a feeling about how everything fits together, yet I don't know if he's even settled on an explanation for everything. He just trusted his subconscious and he's so confident in his latent abilities, that we trust him to show us everything we need to see and take us everywhere we need to go.

I enjoy how it's a surrealist answer to SUNSET BOULEVARD. I hope in 2050, someone makes "The 405" really tying all these movies and Los Angeles roads together.

MULHOLLAND DRIVE is weird but good. Still, I don't know if, to me, it's more weird than good. It's also funny. But is it funny because it's weird or because it's actually, genuinely funny? Are these questions David Lynch actually wants me to ask or does he make it weird on impulse to cover for the fact that the film is simply just weird and based entirely on impulse? MULHOLLAND DRIVE is almost like a parody of a film noir, made by an inter-dimensional alien life-form who studied a bunch of movies from the 40's through the 90's but doesn't have a full grasp on human behavior, and DESPITE THAT, it's more of an emotional experience than a logical one. It's somewhere in between. It's self-indulgent in a way but also very giving. It's a paradox wrapped in an oxymoron wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a coffee-stained napkin covered in cigarette ash locked in a small, blue box.

***

Summing it up: I don't think there's a world where this movie would get a perfect score from me. Because ultimately, for all it's interesting and exciting moments, it's more of a passion project for David Lynch than a piece of entertainment for the audience, no matter how entertaining it may be. To me, it's a vision board more than it is a complete film. And yet, it IS a complete EXPERIENCE. And there's nothing wrong with that.

All of that said, I know David Lynch doesn't really like to give viewers a clear cut, traditional narrative. So, I had a feeling the mystery was just that, a mystery. Or even moreso, the FEELING of a mystery. It's not about where we're going, it's about the journey to the destination. And while the general atmosphere is moody and evocative and often powerful, MULHOLLAND DRIVE plays more like a 2.5 hour piece of music than a cohesive narrative. Maybe that's the best thing about it.

In the distant future, when our way of speaking has become as archaic as the words of Shakespeare are to us, it's the feeling and emotions and images of movies like MULHOLLAND DRIVE that will still have a timeless impact on the future audiences who view them.

[arysthaeniru]

You said you could infodump on Okinawa? Could you tell me more about Okinawa? I know some basic stuff (independent Ryukyuan kingdom effectively until late 1800s, culturally distinct, Hawai'i : USA : : Okinawa : Japan, lot of American bases creating tension since WWII, kinda thing), but I'd love to know more.

Oh Omi, I am so late with this response, but I’m so excited to talk about Okinawa!!! 

(It’s so funny, I’m actually currently associated with an organization called the Okinawa Memories Initiative (OMI) for short, so this has been a funny little joke for my sleep-deprived mind.)

So, Okinawan history is really long and complicated, as all good histories are, so I guess I’ll start with the idea that even though Okinawa is not formally and officially considered a place where indigenous people live, that is absolutely the case! Okinawa has close to about 800 separate dialects across the archipelago chain, and those have been classified into 6 completely distinct languages by linguists and language preservationists. Okinawan clothes, religion, customs, food and environment are very very distinct from mainland Japanese customs, and actually, Okinawan customs mirror the only indigenous group that Japan does recognize, the Ainu, more than it ever looks like mainland Japan.

Despite all of that, Okinawan people are not recognized as an indigenous group officially, and that’s solely because of the American presence on the island. The base situation on Okinawa would be illegal by the UN conventions, were Okinawa considered to be an indigenous population, so bureaucratically, Okinawans are not considered indigenous peoples. Many Okinawans themselves have debates about this: some people wish to be recognized as distinct from Japanese, but the vast majority of Okinawans think of themselves as Japanese and part of Japan, and although they have a different culture, they see it in the same way that Osaka or Hiroshima has slightly different customs from Tokyo. And even those who consider themselves to be distinct from mainland Japanese folks don’t necessarily like the term “indigenous” very much either! 

The base issue on-island today is very heated because these issues actually stem back much longer than just the American occupation. The idea of Okinawan indigeneity is long and tumultuous.

But, let’s take a small detour: Why are the Americans on the island still? That’s a good question. After WW2 and the historically bloody Battle of Okinawa, the Americans took over Okinawa, hoping to use it as a place to launch a mainland attack on Japan, before the idea of atomic bombs were publicized. After the atomic bombs, however, the U.S was very confused about what to do with Okinawa, for a period of about 4 years. They figured they would do to Okinawa what they did to Japan: set the island up to be economically stable, maybe economically dependent on the U.S, and just leave. They didn’t see much to be gained from Okinawa: it’s pretty barren and not super fertile for growing crops, not like the Philippines was. Then, in 1949, the Chinese Communist Party won the Chinese Civil War, and the U.S decided that no, actually, they weren’t going to leave.

This is a map of Okinawa. It’s a military strategy map, and it’s one of the reasons America calls Okinawa, “The Keystone of the Pacific” -- in the midst of Cold War Era preparations, the holding of Okinawa became crucial as a part of America’s Communist Containment Strategy against North Korea and China and Vietnam.

The U.S. was like, “Psyche! If any of you start a war or get too cocky, we’ll be there within the hour to send troops down, so. Don’t do that! This is a deterrent strategy :)”

The Okinawans, of course, replied back, “Hey. If you’re close enough to China to drop a bomb on them within the hour, aren’t they close enough to us to drop a bomb on us within the hour?” 

And the U.S said, “Don’t worry about it :) Your lives aren’t important enough.” This is where a lot of the anger, fear and frustration about the American presence on Okinawa comes from, the fear that Okinawa could get nuked or bombed, in a Pearl Harbour strategy to get rid of America’s major firepower, a process that would harm Okinawans who don’t feel they’re involved or interested in any of America or Japan’s major fights with the rest of the world. 

During the Cold War, Okinawa was used as the launch point for troops headed to the Korean War, the Vietnam War, and even the Afghanistan War. And Okinawans, on their own island, were treated like secondary citizens by the U.S Military Provisional Government. One of the biggest archival records of the injustices that the U.S government inflicted upon Okinawans is the land seizure and underpayment of money for the land seizure, documented and detailed by the U.S provisional government from the 1950s-1960s. By the U.S Government’s own admission, they cheated Okinawans out of millions and millions of dollars, by seizing their land, preventing their crop growth, and underpaying them for the value of the land: and this isn’t even taking into account the significance of the US government stealing ancestral lands, and building bases over and around big ancestral tombs on Okinawa, and barring people access from those tombs. 

(This is an image of a golf course onbase, that just has an ancestral tomb there. You can’t get onto base without a U.S passport, and Okinawans have a festival called Obon, which is very similar to Toussaint and Day of the Dead, where you go to your ancestral tombs and clean it up/pay your respects. This is now impossible for this particular family)

Okinawa is the poorest prefecture in Japan, and although it’s certainly because of pre-war discrimination and the destruction of pretty much all Okinawan capital during the war, the post-war suppression of Okinawan wealth, through the U.S. Military Government’s extortion plays a huge role

There was a large protest movement, headed by a man called Ahagon Shoko, against the U.S Base presence, specifically centred around the issues of land seizure and land rights. Another concurrent movement, started by more liberal, anti-war Okinawans, was centred on removing the U.S base presence because of the threats faced by Okinawans during the Cold War. A third movement, filled with people who felt more closely aligned with Japanese nationalists, and were fed up of the strange, new customs that the American government was imposing upon the populace, pushed for Okinawa to return to Japan. These movements all put a lot of pressure on the U.S Military government, and eventually led to the 1972 Reversion of Okinawa from American control to Japanese control. 

This wasn’t the happiest solution. After all, during the war, Japan’s fascistic treatment of Okinawans as expendable soldiers who have to give up everything for the Emperor—but also, your language and customs are backwards and we think you’re inherently untrustworthy—was something most Okinawans despised. Going back to Japan was not an ideal solution for many who felt humiliated by mainland Japanese folks.

However. Even though the island was now part of Japan, the U.S bases never left. A few were shut down, but the majority of the large bases remained. This was, in many ways, a problem. 

Some statistics (which are highly contested, so take them with a grain of salt!) 75% of the American bases in Japan are congregated on Okinawa, taking up over 35% of the available land on Okinawa. Of the land that has been paved over by the American bases, about 65% is supposed to be arable, fertile land. For what the American bases primarily do, which is working with experimental technology and running field training, the American bases are FAR too close to cities and places where people live, especially in a town called Ginowan. 

This is just a screenshot of Google Maps around MCAS Futenma, and you can see just how closely the base hugs the town. What you can also see is the proximity of several schools and universities to the edge of the base, which has been the cause for many tragic accidents. Okinawa International University's incident with the Osprey crashing into one of the buildings, and injuring several students, is perhaps the most well-known issue, but just last year, a helicopter window fell out of a test vehicle, and landed on the elementary school playground, which only just narrowly avoided killing students. 

The daily noise pollution is more of a problem, though. One of my friends, is actually in the process of writing a research paper, with an ARC GIS map describing the levels of noise pollution in the cities around bases. It’s not published yet, so I don’t have the images for you, but ALL of the bases violate international laws about noise pollution that’s acceptable for civilians to be exposed to. It’s pretty bad. 

So, there’s been a movement to get rid of the bases on Okinawa lately, and in some ways, it succeeded. The U.S government has agreed to eventually get rid of MCAS Futenma. Bill Clinton signed a bill in 1992 saying it would eventually be removed.

However, the military is constantly infighting, there’s a big pissing competition between the Army, Marines and the Air Force, and the Marines were not happy with the idea that their influence on Okinawa would be reduced (MCAS Futenma is one of the biggest Marine bases on-island.) So instead, they decide to expand their base at Camp Schwab, which is up in the north of Okinawa, in a place called Henoko.

(This is a picture of Camp Schwab and Oura Bay: all of the marked-out land has been filled in with concrete by this point.)

You’ve probably heard of Henoko in the news a lot, its construction is a huge controversy. Henoko is special for a multitude of reasons. Not only is it a spiritual place for many of the Okinawans there, it’s also home to one of the largest coral reefs in Japan AND it’s the home of the endangered species, the dugong. To build out Henoko, they would have to destroy the coral reef by filling in the bay with concrete, and they would have to destroy a lot of the natural wildlife on land and in the ocean. Understandably, Okinawans and wildlife activists alike were NOT pleased.

Activists set up a large protest tent outside Camp Schwab, and have been there since the 1990s, when the Henoko construction was first announced. The main protestors there are old folks, and although the news loves to pretend that the base issue is only a thing that old people care about, that’s just not the case. Younger people have jobs and school and can’t be there, but the mood of the populace is very much against new bases being built!

(On a sidenote, a lot of young folks don’t mind the existing bases being around, actually, but it’s a complicated and nuanced topic, especially when we discuss young women. For more details, I would suggest the INCREDIBLE book by Akemi Johnson, Night in the American Village, which details the ways in which Okinawan women interface with American troops in positive and intensely negative ways. The American military gets extremely bad press in Okinawa for the frequent rapes, and violent incidents that occur every couple years like clockwork.)

(I was actually at this protest, which happened in 2018, after the death of beloved Okinawan Governor, Takeshi Onaga, who was a staunch anti-military-base politician. Thousands of people were gathered together on this incredibly rainy and miserable day, that precluded a typhoon, just to voice their support against the bases. It was truly a moment of understanding just how deeply he base issue rings in the hearts of many, even if they can’t afford to express it all the time.)

Anyway, after a lot of back-and-forths, and issues with Henoko constantly being brought to the appeals court in San Francisco and dismissed by the U.S. Government, the issue comes to a head in 2019. New governor, Denny Tamaki, is appointed as the successor to Takeshi Onaga, and he’s very anti-base as well! In fact, one of the first things he does, is hold a referendum, to gauge the Okinawan mood against Henoko’s construction. What’s the outcome?

Absolutely unsurprising for anybody who’d been paying attention. More than 70% of Okinawans are against the bases. Does this stop the American construction in any way? Nope! In fact, just three days after the referendum results were released, the bay was completely filled in with concrete and the coral reef was destroyed.

You might be wondering at this point: why does Japan tolerate the presence of the American military in what is actually a Japanese prefecture? Well, simply put, the Japanese-American alliance is incredibly strong at this point, and is almost entirely from self-preservation. In the Japanese constitution created by Americans in the aftermath of WW2, racist Americans thought that the Japanese people were simply “predisposed towards war” and the only way to prevent Japan’s imperialism was to prevent them from being militaristic all together. Article Nine of the Japanese Constitution bans Japan from having a standing army. Japan doesn’t really obey this. The Japan Self Defense Force is actually the fifth largest army in the world in terms of firepower: with the caveat that they can’t start conflicts, they can only defend themselves and aid their allies. So, America and Japan are deeply tied together, because America could potentially start wars Japan can’t, and help defend them, in the event of a war.

Japan, as I mentioned before, also still has something of a discriminatory attitude toward Okinawans. Pretty every depiction of Okinawans I’ve seen in Japanese popular media is filled with hurtful stereotypes and is pretty xenophobic? And many Okinawans describe going to mainland Japan as something very strange, because there’s this common perception that they’re uneducated hicks or whatever. Okinawans still aren’t really considered Japanese, and so there’s very much a NIMBY attitude about the military bases by the Japanese government. They essentially think, “Well, the American bases are a necessary evil to keeping Japan safe. Oh, and most of them are congregated in Okinawa, where the average Japanese citizen won’t ever see them? Great!”

(Not to mention, a few of the big bases on Okinawa are JSDF bases and are equally despised by Okinawans too, and there’s an understanding of why the Japanese government is fine with American interference, and refuses to allow Okinawan opinion to sway their minds).

Although construction had been halted onsite for a while, because of coronavirus, it’s back to building as usual, despite the ongoing protests at Henoko. I don’t think the Okinawan people win this battle against the will of the American government, destroying things all over the world, as they are wont to do.

In one final piece of tragedy, the last Okinawan dugong has been missing for the past few months, after the other two were found dead. We think it’s almost certainly dead too. The dugongs, who are spiritual vessels in the Okinawan religion, are a true loss.

In terms of Okinawan language and culture and stuff, I think I might need another post entirely to discuss that, but some incredibly special and incredible parts is:

Okinawan Music, usually sung in uchinaaguchi! Both more traditional songs like Tinsagu no Hana (remixed here by some cool folks!) and some newer songs by BEGIN like Nada Sou Sou and Shimanchu nu Takara! Just some incredibly moving stuff.

One of the many folk dances on Okinawa, Eisa! Eisa’s usually performed during the Obon season and it’s such a beautiful and skilled dance coordinated by so many! One of the most fun things during Eisa season is every year, 10,000 Eisa dancers fill up International Street in Naha and dance pretty much all day! Here’s a video of the festival that I went to (but not my video, since I didn’t have a tripod that day)

The UNESCO page and its justifications for why it chose certain Okinawan sites is a good useful place to start, when thinking of unique Okinawan architecture! From the red-brick roof tiles of Shuri Castle (which was tragically destroyed in a fire in late 2019), to the unique constructions of all the old gusuku, made without mortar, to the beautiful Seifa Utaki, where many practitioners of Okinawan religion gather for its spiritual connections, there’s a lot to learn!

Okinawan pottery is absolutely gorgeous! One of the main recognized styles is tsuboya-yaki, which was created in the Ryukyuan Dynasty in the 1400-1500s, but refined by Kinjo Jiro, a man so good at redefining Okinawan Pottery, he was called a Living Treasure! All pottery in Okinawa used to be centred around the Tsuboya district in Naha, but when Kinjo moved up to Yomitan, some many people followed him that Yomitan is now a pottery destination! There are other styles too, influenced by China and Korea.

I could keep going. Okinawa’s known for all of its folk-crafts. From bingata, to lacquerware, to kijoka-bashofu, to ryukyu glass...there’s an incredibly vibrant and alive culture, for all that people want to pretend Okinawan cultures are dead and in the past.

I wrote my undergraduate thesis on the way that Okinawan culture is both dependent on the sorts of tourism that keeps a lot of these folk-crafts and traditional sites relevant and funded, but are also destroyed by the ways that tourists bring their own colonialist visions to Okinawa and how Japan’s influence in Okinawan tourist sites keeps alive imperialist narratives about Okinawa, and how tourist presence often destroys the natural beauty of a lot of these sites. It’s a constant difficult survival of balancing the two, but it’s not an unfamiliar struggle for anybody who studies indigenous island cultures and the way that tourism works in those places. In any case, thinking about Okinawan culture in a non-touristy sense is the best thing to do!

[idkorc18]

It’s Called Mummification

Yay! A new story, this time based on ‘The Mummy’! Starring Illinois, Mark, and of course You! I also changed the scene a bit because I love Illinois and I wanted a little relationship between Illinois and (Y/n) so...Enjoy!!

*Not my gif. Gif belongs to apileofgarbo

 Illinois and (Y/N) were digging into the ceiling. Why they were digging into the ceiling, who knows but it was easy to get to the book (Y/N) talks so much about.

“Let me get this straight,” Illinois started, “they ripped out your guts and stuff them in jars.”

(Y/N) smiled as she held up one of her tools for excavating.

“And then they take out your heart as well. Oh, and you know how they took out your brains?”

“(N/N), I don’t think we need to know this,” Mark concentrated on hitting small rocks away like golf balls with his pickaxe. He was only half-listening to his friend’s conversation with the adventurer. 

(Y/N) ignored Mark as Illinois stared at her with interest, “they take a sharp, red hot poker stick it up your nose, scramble things about a bit, and then rip it all out through your nostrils.”

“Oh,” Illinois rubbed at his nose. “That’s gotta hurt.”

“It’s called mummification. You’ll be dead when they do this.”

“For the record, if I don’t make it out of here, don’t put me down for mummification.”

Mark chuckled, “like-wise.”

He went to hit another rock but missed it by a few inches. Instead, he hit the wall he was next too. Suddenly, the ceiling caved and down fell a… box? (Y/N) was pulled back by Illinois, to make sure she wasn’t hurt. Once the dust started to settle, all three friends look to the massive stone casement.

(Y/N) took a step closer and gasped, “oh my god, it looks like, it looks like a sarcophagus. Buried at the base of Anubis. He must have been someone of great importance.”

Illinois leans closer to look at the engravings.

“Or…”

Illinois and Mark both looked at the woman.

“Or he did something very naughty.”

They start to clear the sand off the top to get a better look at the hieroglyphs. (Y/N) stares at it for a moment before Mark came closer with a flashlight.

“Well? Who is it?”

(Y/N) continues to read but is confused and concerned.

“He that shall not be named.”

“Voldemort?”

(Y/N) slightly smiled and rolled her eyes at Mark before reading again. Illinois brushed away some more dirt before finding a shape. He blew into it and found a weird engraving. He stared at it a moment longer before speaking.

“This looks like some sort of lock.”

“Well, whoever’s in here sure wasn’t getting out.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” Illinois leaned closer to inspect it, “it’ll take a month to crack into this thing without a key.”

“Key? A key! That’s it! That’s what he was talking about.”

“Who was talking about what?”

Mark shrugged his shoulders as the two men watched (Y/N) rummage through Mark’s bag.

“The man on the barge. The one with the hook,” (Y/N) looked at Illinois as he remembered the exact man (Y/N) was talking about. As they traveled here, the trio where caught in a little mishap as some men were trying to stop them from coming here. 

‘Maybe this was the reason why,’ Illinois thought.

“He was looking for a key,” (Y/N) pulled a small box that opened into the exact shape as the lock. She places it inside and it fit like a glove. (Y/N) smiled up to Illinois as she became excited. Illinois couldn’t fight his grin, even if he tried. 

It was nice seeing (Y/N) so excited about something. When Mark came to the pair months after they started traveling together with a map and a legend about a city of gold, Illinois didn’t believe it. But (Y/N), that amazing woman, was so excited and loved the idea of it. She always wanted to go to Eygpt, Illinois finally agreed and packed his bags.

The three friends were startled by screaming. (Y/N) and Illinois followed the sound as Mark grabbed the key and followed suit. They ran through a doorway and found their guide screaming and running towards them. (Y/N) was pulled by Illinois and held against him as they fell against the wall. Their guide ran past them and screamed until he ran into a wall and fell back, dead.

The three friends just stared in terror and (Y/N) held onto Illinois and felt sick. 

“Does-does this happen often?”

Illinois glanced at Mark before looking down at (Y/N). He sighed as she shook in his arms and started taking her out of the hall.

“Not, not really. Come on, I’ll get someone to help get him.

“But Illinois,” (Y/N) spun around to Illinois.

“No (Y/N), you’re in shock. We may go on these often but stuff like this almost never happens. I’m getting you out of here and taking care of this.”

(Y/N) almost started crying but nodded her head, he was right, stuff like this never happened. Mark grabbed her arm and started to pull her out after him. (Y/N) pulled back and hugged Illinois. She kissed his cheek and thanked him.

He smiled and watched Mark walk out to give them privacy. He kissed the top of her head and then her forehead.

“No problem sweetheart. I’ll be up in a few minutes, ok?”

She smiled and nodded. He gave her a quick kiss and she left with Mark.

Illinois’s smiled dropped and walked back to the body. He was getting worried and he felt like this was only the beginning.

[give-me-back-my-rhodey]

The Treasures of a Stark - AUgust Day 16

Title: The Treasures of a Stark

Author: Purple_ducky00

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Brief mention of background characters’ racism

Pairings: Sam/Bucky, Rhodey/Tony

Link: Read on AO3

Summary: Sam and Bucky are famous Youtube treasure hunters. When searching for treasure that may have part of insurance fraud, they don't expect the grandson of the accused to help out.

+++++++

“So, this time, we’re searching for the insurance fraud dump of Montgomery Stark.” Sam Wilson looks right at the camera. “Rumor is, about fifty years ago, Mr. Stark reported more than half of his heirlooms and precious jewels stolen, racking up millions in insurance money. No one ever knows because he died two months after he collected the money, but there are rumors that the man ‘stole’ the things and buried them somewhere off his property. We’re going to see if we can find it. Montgomery Stark was outlived by his son Howard Stark, who died about fifteen years go. Now, the face of the operation is his son, Tony Stark.” “But if we do find it, we’re not giving it to the insurance company because fuck them.” Bucky adds. “Also fuck Tony Stark, the asshole.” Sam motions to cut, and the camera turns off.

Anyone who watches their show knows that Bucky has a dislike for insurance companies. They have screwed him over too many times. He’s highly distrusting of any high power and is more likely to punch first and ask questions later when feeling threatened. But when it comes to doing things for the thrill or exploring anything haunted, he’s the first one to advocate for it.

 Sam, on the other hand, is a little more reasonable. He doesn’t exactly like people in power either, but he isn’t actively hating them. What he actively hates is horror, but he lets Bucky drag him into hunts for haunted treasure. He’s not sure why. Steve is. “Bucky, wasn’t Tony Stark the one who designed that awesome prosthetic?”

 “Yeah, but he’s a billionaire. Fuck him.”

 Sam shakes his head. “Ok, well, you can do that, but I’m going to research this a little more.” He gets up and doesn’t notice Bucky’s face behind him. Pulling out maps and the case files, Sam tries to figure out where the late Mr. Stark could have hidden his stash. Bucky sits at the table a few minutes later.

 “What do you want me to do?” He asks.

 Sam hands him the printed statements from everyone the police had interviewed while the case was open. “Here, read through these. See if anything looks useful.”

 Bucky gets to work, and Sam plots different coordinates into his maps. He’s not finding anything anywhere until Bucky slides over a paper that has the statement of Montgomery Stark’s housekeeper, a Madeline Foster. They first ask her if she was there the night of the robbery. She advised that no, she was not, as she starts work and 6am and leaves at 7pm each day. The robbery took place around 9pm. After clearing herself after a few more questions, they begin to interview her with the view of Montgomery Stark committing insurance fraud. She told them that she doubts he did because “Mr. Stark runs on a schedule that he hasn’t broken for the last fifty years.” Ms. Foster goes on to give the police Montgomery’s full schedule.

 “We can work with this. See where these places are. I wonder if any of these places has anywhere that he could have hidden it.” Sam grins.

 They both work on the case for a good five hours before they both call it a day. “We’ll get back to it tomorrow.” Bucky stretches. “Hey, Steve texted me, asking if I wanted to grab dinner. Wanna come?”

 “I don’t want to third-wheel if Steve wants it to be you two.” Sam isn’t sure why Bucky does this. Does he not want to be in a relationship with Steve, but he doesn’t know how to break up with him?

 Bucky’s eyes widen. “Sam, Steve and I, we’re like brothers. There is, never was, and never will be any romantic love between us. Only platonic and familial. Now, come on. I can even buy you dinner if that’s what you’re worried about.”

 “I can pay for my own.” Sam shoves him. “I’m not going to be your sugar baby.”

They meet Steve at their favorite local restaurant. He asks them about their newest project. When they tell him, he warns them, “The Starks can be pretty private. I knew Howard Stark before he died, and he was nice enough, but I didn’t really know anything about him.”

 Bucky swears. “It figures. If they hear anything about it, they’ll shut us down. Can’t stand to let us find out hidden family secrets.”

 “We’re not that big. I’m sure they won’t hear about it.” Sam tries to reassure them.

  ++++++++

Sam and Bucky try to find clues to help them figure out where Montgomery Stark might have hidden his treasure. After two weeks of no progress, they are wondering if they should just give up. They hear their secretary say something in a loud voice, and another voice answers her. “What’s going on out there?” Bucky wonders.

 “Sir, you can’t just walk back there! You need to book an appointment!” Darcy is getting closer.

 The other voice replies. “Relax. I just want to talk to them. I’m not going to hurt them. This door?” The door opens… and Tony Stark walks through.

 “Fuck.” Bucky mumbles. “Guess Steve was right.”

 Stark looks at them, then holds out his hand. “Hello, Mr. Wilson & Mr. Barnes, I presume? I’m Tony Stark, and I’m here to talk to you.”

 “Sam Wilson, sir. Nice to meet you.” Sam shakes it. “This is my colleague, Bucky Barnes.”

 “Ah, the first Stark Prosthetic. Does it meet your needs and expectations?”

 Surprised that Tony Stark would remember a name, Bucky stumbles over his words. “Y-yeah it works…. Um… pretty good, I I guess.”

 “Pretty good is not good enough. If we have time today (and you’d like), I would take a look at it for you. But that’s not why I’m here. I’m here because I heard wind that you were looking into Grampa Monty’s treasure.”

 “Do you have a problem with that?” Bucky challenges.

 Stark shakes his head. “No, I want to help you. The truth is, I fully believe that my grandfather committed insurance fraud. Which is kind of a dick move because 1.) my grandmother was so disturbed by the whole ordeal; she spent the rest of her life in bed. Not that he knew, I guess, because he died a few months after the robbery. Bad karma is my guess. Also, 2.) much of that stuff was my mother’s jewels from her family. He had no right to collect insurance on any of that, but he did. Now, I would like my mother’s belongings. I’m not sure how it works, but if I have to pay the insurance companies back, I will. If you have any clues, I will help you out in any way that I can.”

 “Are you ok with being videoed for the episode?” Sam asks. “We will have to get our lawyers to draw up a form for you to sign.”

 “Of course. I don’t want to be a bother. Take your time. Here’s my card. Please, give me a call when you can, and I will come down as soon as possible. Thank you for you time.” Stark nods and walks out the door. They can hear him thanking Darcy as he leaves.

  She comes in a few minutes later. “I’m sorry guys. He just wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

 “It’s ok Darcy. There was nothing you could do about it.” Bucky smiles at her. “Thanks for trying.”

 “I like what you do, and you guys pay me well.” She winks.

 When Darcy goes back to her desk, Bucky turns to Sam. “What do you think?”

 “I mean, he seems like he’s eager to help us.” Sam nods. “He can probably get us into different high-end things that we could not on our own. Want to call Matt and Foggy?”

 “Yes. I think they might have some good insight.”

 Sam calls their lawyers, Matt Murdock and Foggy Nelson, explaining the situation. They advise to make a strict NDA for Tony to sign. If he’s ok with it or only requests small changes (to be okayed by them), they would advise to go forward with Stark’s help. An NDA is drawn up and forwarded to Stark. He arrives the next day with it and another man in hand.

 “Everything looks good. It is signed and noted. Shall we start?” He questions.

 “Tones.” The other guy gives him a look.

 Smacking his forehead, Stark looks embarrassed. “Fuck. I forgot. Gentlemen, this is my boyfriend, Colonel James Rhodes. I call him Rhodey. Rhodey, this is Mr. Sam Wilson and Mr. Bucky Barnes.”

 “Nice to meet you,” The colonel says, shaking their hands. “Call me Rhodey.”

 “Rhodey signed the NDA as well, so you don’t have to worry about me trying to loophole something with him. We are going to do this with integrity.”

 Bucky and Sam give each other a look, both seemingly swept up in Tony Stark’s big personality. Rhodey notices and gives him a small shove. “Tones, this is their show. We’re just in the background pulling strings to help them.”

 “That’s right. Tell us where we need to be and what we need to do.”

 Sam takes control. “Thank you, gentlemen. If you want to take a seat at the table, we are just going through these papers with a fine-toothed comb to see if there’s anything we missed.”

 The cameras roll, and the four men go through the papers. Tony finds Ms. Foster’s statement, and he holds it up. “This could be huge. Let’s see… the house was robbed on a Tuesday. He probably would have stashed the loot in the next two days, wouldn’t you think?” He looks to the others for confirmation. “Ok, so his Wednesday schedule. Come down for breakfast at 6:30. Go into the office by 7. He wouldn’t have kept the stuff at the office because police did a full sweep of SI as well. Wednesday lunches were spent at La Palova. That’s a pretty exclusive restaurant with plenty of cameras. Let’s just say for now that it’s probably not there. Back to office by one, wow, he kept a really tight schedule. Old Monty left the office at 230 to golf at Emerald Isle. Tons of open land there. Be home by 730 for dinner. I mean, there’s time, but not much. Sorry, am I taking over here?”

 “No, you’re the only one who knows about this stuff, so keep going.”

 “Ok. Thursday schedule, almost the same. Gives himself an hour for lunch, but after work, he likes to drive in the canyon. He was too old for much exercise, I’d bet, but maybe he likes to watch the sunset? The sunsets there are beautiful. Also, a great place to hide not-really-stolen treasure.”

 Rhodey speaks up, “There’s also that little bend where we used to go to make out away from the house, remember? For a guy who spent his whole life driving the canyon, he should know all the ins and outs.”

 “Are you saying that we might have had sex on top of my mother’s heirlooms?” Tony shudders. “That’s creepy.”

 Bucky and Sam share that look again.  Sam shakes his head and puts his hands up. “Okayyyy… we do not need to know more. Remember, the camera is rolling. So, you think that Montgomery Stark hid the stuff in the canyon?”

 “I honestly think he hid it somewhere on the golf course. He owned shares in the course and the club, so technically, no one could ask him why he’s on any part of the land. I wonder if that got passed down.” Tony hums. “I think Monty would’ve thought that people would be suspicious of the canyon.”

 “Well, when we actually get our resources, we can split up into two bands. Mr. Stark, you can take one of us to the golf course. Rhodey, you can take the other to the canyon. There will be a lot of exploring to be done.” Bucky advises.

 Sam tacks on. “Yea, and we have more than one camera so we can film both of us at the same time.”

 By the end of the week, Sam and Bucky think they have the resources they need to scope out both places. They banter back and forth like normal throughout the week. As they’re arguing about who’s going to the golf course and who’s going to the canyon, when Tony asks, “Hey, I meant to ask you. How long have you guys been dating?”

 Bucky chokes and Sam coughs. “We’re… not… dating.” He says and looks at Bucky.

 “Oh, just fucking? Like friends with benefits?” Tony raises an eyebrow.

 Rhodey admonishes. “Tony, language. Camera is rolling.”

 “Ah, they’ll edit it out. Listen boys, if you’re not dating or at least screwing, you should. You got some serious charisma. Kind of like my honeybear and me.” He smooches Rhodey on the cheek.

 “Well, we’re not. End of discussion.” Bucky knows his face is bright red. He really likes Sam, and he thinks Sam likes him. However, he’s too afraid to make the first move. He doesn’t want to mess up the team dynamic.

 Tony smirks. “Whatever. I think I can answer your question, though. Due to the fact that old elitist country clubs are still pretty fucking racist, it might be better if I take Bucky. Unfortunately, there will be less suspicion, and we can get through a lot faster without someone trailing us at all times. You should have seen the last time I took Rhodey somewhere like that. I refused to go back.” He shudders. “I’ll see what I can do if we have to go back a second day, but…” Tony trails off.

 Sam slings an arm around Rhodey’s shoulders. “Don’t worry. We’ll have fun exploring the canyon and talking about you white boys.”

 “If you’re sure. I’m sorry we had to make a decision that way, you know?” Tony smiles sadly.

 +++++++++

The next day, Tony takes Bucky to the Emerald Isle golf course. They talk about this and that, but Tony notices Bucky is a little withdrawn. “Hey, you ok?” He asks.

 “Yea, I’m just trying to figure out what my friend would say if he found out I was hanging out with a billionaire today.”

 “Eat the rich kind of guy?” Tony knows a few of those.

 Bucky grins. “Yea. I am, too.”

 “Well, you surely aren’t pulling any punches. Do you have any questions for me?” Tony is genuinely interested. Barnes seemed like a level-headed kind of guy. He might have some good ideas for Tony to try.

 “I do, actually. How do you feel about making a difference in the world?”

 “I am very strongly for it, but I don’t always need my name on things, contrary to popular belief. They call me a billionaire because I earn billions annually. However, I and the company pay most of our taxes without using loopholes. Other than voting and lobbying a little, I can’t convince the government to do the right thing with the money. Yes, I do have multiple houses and cars, and I even own an island, but much of my money is sunk into various charities and funds around the world. Some have my name backing them, like the September Grants, but plenty of them are given anonymously so my accountant can’t get mad at me for not taking the tax breaks. So, yes, I do want to help change the world for the better, but I don’t want it to seem like I, myself made the world better.”

 Bucky just nods. They make small talk again until Tony brings up Sam. “I think he’s a great guy. You have a great co-worker in him.”

 “Yea, and he’s the love of my life.” Bucky sighs.

 Tony turns to look at him, and Bucky warns. “Eyes on the road.”

“I will.” Tony turns back. “But you love him? Why don’t you tell him? Do you know amazing your life would be?”

 “I don’t want to mess up our already good thing. I mean, I think he likes me, but what if he doesn’t? What if we date and then break up, and we can’t do this anymore? It’s not easy to find a job with a prosthetic.”

 “You could start your own channel. People like you enough. They’ll watch you.” Tony suggests. “But if you want it to last, don’t think about what will happen if it doesn’t.”

 “I’ll think about it.” Bucky mutters.

 Tony pulls into the Emerald Isle valet parking area. “We’re here.” He hands the valet his keys and tips him. “Follow me.”

 He leads Bucky to the manager’s office where he tells the man at the desk that he just realized he inherited the shares from Howard, and he’s looking over the property to see if he should buy more shares, sell these, or stay where I’m at. Do you mind if I take my guy and look around?”

 The manager stammers and acquiesces. He gives Tony keys to a golf cart and a map of the property. They start scouting, the camera guy sitting in the back of the cart. “You know what you’re looking for more than me.” Tony tells Bucky. Let me know if you want me to pull over somewhere.”

 ++++++ “So, how long have you and Tony been together?” Sam asks as Rhodey drives him down the interstate towards the canyon.

 Rhodey shrugs. “Nineteen, twenty years? We started dating when he was nineteen. I was twenty-one.”

 “You guys seem to have what it takes. I’m happy for you.” He wishes he and Bucky could have that, but he knows that Bucky doesn’t like him that way.

 “Thanks. Yea, Tony can be a complete dumbass eighty percent of the time, but he’s a loveable one, you know?”

 Sam nods. He knows someone like that. He sighs. If Bucky’s not for him, Buck’s not for him. End of story. He’ll find someone else at some point. “So, how’s life as a colonel? That’s got to be rough on your relationship, especially before DADT was repealed.”

 “I am happy with my job. I do get more leave because I date Tony Stark, who supplies the military with hi-tech equipment that can’t be weaponized. He won’t make them weapons of any sort anymore.”

 “I don’t blame him. Weapons manufacturing is not a business I’d like to be in.” The two chat about whatever comes to mind until Rhodes pulls off the road at a bend in the canyon.

 “Ok here. There are caves just beyond this bend. Most of them have never been explored. I’ll show you the ones we have definitely been in.”

 “Oh yes, now I’ll be imagining your sexploits.” Sam groans and Rhodey chuckles. “Now, we have to think… Montgomery was an old man at this point. There’s no way he could have dug very deep.”

 Rhodey mans the camera, and Sam grabs a shovel. They head toward the caves. Cave after cave, Sam checks the ground for any areas that may have been dug up and replaced. Those he did find were too small to hold anything like the stash the late Stark would have had. Further and further back they go until Rhodey is worried about the wall stability. “We should probably stay closer to the cave openings.”

 After going through all the caves and finding nothing, Sam relaxes back against the cave wall. “Whew. Maybe Tony was right. There’s nothing here.” The wall moves a little, and he jumps out. Turning, he and Rhodey see a 10” by 10” hold in the wall. Looking inside, they see a small pile of jewels and gold bars!

Sam whips out his phone to call Bucky just as his phone starts ringing. “Hello?”

 “Sam! We found some of the treasure! It was in a secret room in a shed near the edge of the property. It was all overgrown because no one has been there for years!” Bucky sounds very excited.

 “We found the rest! It was in a secret wall in one of the caves! Are you taking it with you today? We’re going to grab this stuff.” Sam is smiling widely.

 Putting on gloves, Sam slides all the treasures into a knapsack. Once done, they walk out of the cave. Rhodey looks back at it, squinting. “Tony’s not going to be happy about this.” He grins.

“Don’t tell me.” Sam warns. “I don’t want to hear it.”

 Rhodey drops Sam off at home. “Put that in a safe or something til tomorrow.” He warns. “Hey Sam, also, I don’t want to tell you what to do, but Barnes likes you, too. He makes heart-eyes at you all day. If your fans can see it, it’s there.” Sam nods and Rhodey drives off.

 ++++++ “So, friends, that’s how we found treasure and solved a crime in the episode!” Sam grins.

 “Also, when Tony asked the question of how long we’ve been dating, we have an answer for him now.” Bucky adds in. “It has been a week ago today.” Sam and Bucky kiss in front of the camera as the screen fades to black.

 “Wow, this episode got a lot of love,” Tony comments. “I’d like to think it was all me. Also.” He turns to Rhodey. “I can’t believe we blew each other right beside my mother’s jewels. I think her ghost is attached to those things. I may have scarred her for her entire afterlife.”

 “Tell me, does ‘Bam’ or ‘Sucky’ sound better as a ship name?” Bucky speaks up. “Twitter made a poll.”

 Sam swats at Bucky’s shoulder. “Tell them Sambucky. They should learn how to name things correctly.” They share a kiss again. Sam is happy he had the courage to talk to Bucky. Spending the rest of his life with this man sounds like a good idea.

[nickburn]

Things I Enjoyed in 2020 Despite Everything

Seasons Greetings! This year has felt like an eternity for so many reasons, and before it’s over, I’d like to take a look back on the distractions that got me through it. Along the way, I’ll occasionally point out where I was emotionally at the time and whether I got into a particular thing before or after the pandemic hit in mid March. I hope you enjoy this little retrospective of some of my experience during one of the worst years of human history!

Games & Mods

Might & Magic VI: The Mandate of Heaven

When I was making my 2020 resolutions list late last year, one of my goals was to play more old games in my backlog and not buy many new games this year. That goal largely went on hold, because, well, I sought out enjoyment wherever I could find it instead of forcing myself to play one thing or another. But before Covid, I was really enjoying my new playthrough of M&M6. I’d made attempts at it before, but it was really GrayFace’s mod that made the game click for me. Modern features like quick saves and mouselook make the game much more accessible, and I’d recommend it to anyone who wants to try an old-school RPG. It’s a great stepping stone into a mostly-dead genre. I’m hoping to get back to it soon. I just jumped ship to simpler ventures like Doom Eternal after the pandemic hit and haven’t looked back since.

Pathologic 2

I learned about the Pathologic series late last year and have since become a little obsessed with it. Hbomberguy’s lengthy video essay on the original game really intrigued me and lead me to trying the sequel/remake in April via Xbox Game Pass. In a weird way, it was cathartic to be a doctor in an even more dire situation than our current one and still see signs of the townsfolk trying to help each other deal with a supernatural plague and little help from their local government. The game helped me express a lot of what I was feeling at the time, when I was still getting used to working from home and wondering just how long this could go on for. I’ve gone back to it recently, and I’m hoping to finish it someday, if I can find a way to stop dying. Above all, Pathologic 2 teaches you how to make choices in no-win scenarios with little information or resources and still persevere, despite the world going to Hell around you. And that’s maybe the most important thing to practice at the moment.

Overwatch

I’ve continued to look forward to weekly Overwatch nights with my friends every Thursday, and it’s really important to have something like that right now. Even if it’s just a new episode of a show airing, a new video from a favorite YouTuber, or a regular Zoom call with coworkers, it helps so much to have something to anticipate from week to week and month to month. Otherwise, it’s really easy to feel like nothing’s going on besides the entropic deterioration of the universe. Overwatch itself helps with this, because it’s such a positive, bright, and optimistic game, as only Blizzard can create. And it’s improved a ton in the past couple of years, in a lot of ways. If you haven’t played in a while, hop in and check out all the new content with your friends; I think you’ll have a great time. It’s looking more and more like Overwatch 2 is right around the corner, and I’m very much looking forward to it.

Go

I learned how to play Go after watching a documentary released this year about  AlphaGo, the computer that beat the Go world champion, and I have a huge appreciation for the game now. I think it’s even more beautiful than chess, though even more insidious to learn. If you haven’t played before, start with a 9x9 board, teach yourself the basics, and try playing with another beginner friend. I guarantee you’ll be amazed at the amount of strategy and imagination that a game ostensibly about placing black and white stones on a grid can inspire. Go’s one of several new hobbies I’ve picked up this year, and those new hobbies have really helped me pass the time in a way that feels productive as well as take my mind off whatever depressing news just got blasted across Twitter.

Doom 64

Doom Eternal was fine, but Doom 64′s where my heart lies. The PC port on Steam is great, allowing everyone to easily play the game with mouse and keyboard. Its levels are tight and colorful, often asking the player to backtrack multiple times through the same areas to unlock new ones and take on whatever new twists await down each darkened corridor. It’s a surprisingly fresh experience. Unlike many modern Doom mods that strive to be sprawling marathons, 64′s levels are short but memorable, and the game is a great entry point to the series for newcomers because of that. Retro FPS’s continue to inspire and entertain me, and Doom 64 is one of my new favorites.

Golf With Your Friends

I’m not usually that into party games, but Golf With Your Friends strikes the right balance between casual tone and skill-based gameplay. The maps are vibrant and devious, the different modes are creative and often hilarious, and the pacing is near-perfect. If you’ve got a squad itching to play something together for a few nights, I guarantee you’ll have a lot of laughs trying to knock an opponent off the course or turning them into an acorn just as they’re about to attempt a nasty jump.

Quake 1 Mods

I probably sound like a broken record by now to a lot of you, but I won’t rest until I get more people into retro FPS’s. The outdated graphics and simple gameplay can be off-putting at first, but it doesn’t take long at all to get hooked after you’ve played the likes of excellent mods like Ancient Aliens for Doom 2 or Arcane Dimensions for Quake 1. And it’s only getting better, with this year marking probably the best year for Quake releases ever. The industry even seems to be taking notice again, with many talented mappers getting picked up for highly-anticipated, professional indie projects like Graven and Prodeus. And while the marketing around the retro FPS renaissance as the second coming of “boomer shooters” should be much maligned, the actual craft involved in making mods and brand new games in the genre has never been stronger. I even contributed four levels to the cause this year, but you’ll have to play them yourself to decide if they’re any good: https://www.quaddicted.com/reviews/?filtered=burnham.

Streets of Rage 4

I had not tried Steam Remote Play before this year, but it works surprisingly well if you have a decent internet connection. Because of Remote Play, I was able to complete Streets of Rage 4 with my friends, and it was very close to the experiences I had as a kid playing brawlers like Turtles in Time on the Super Nintendo. The game is just hard enough to make you sweat during the boss fights but just easy enough that the average group of gamers can complete it in a night or two, which is ideal for adults with not a lot of free time.

Hard Lads

Hard Lads is a pure delight of a game by Robert Yang about the beauty of a viral video from 2015 called “British lads hit each other with chair,” which is even more ridiculous than it sounds. It made me smile and laugh for a good half hour, and I think it’ll do the same for you.

Commander MtG

The Commander format for Magic: the Gathering is one of my favorite things, and in 2020, I dug into it more than any other year. More so even than playing or watching it being played, I created decklists for hours and hours, dreaming up new, creative strategies for winning games or just surprising my imaginary opponents. I sincerely believe this little ritual of finding a new legendary creature to build around and spending a few days crafting a brew for it got me through the majority of this summer. I didn’t have a lot of creative energy this year, but I was able to channel the little I did have into this hobby. Especially during the longer, more frustrating or depressing days at work when I had nothing else to do or just needed a break, I could often dive back into card databases and lose myself in the process of picking exactly the cards that best expressed what I wanted to do for any given deck. And it’s nice to know I can always fall back on that.

Yu-Gi-Oh!

I played a lot of Yu-Gi-Oh! growing up but never had the cards or the skill to be particularly good at it. I just knew I enjoyed the game and the 4Kids show, but I quickly them behind when I got to high school. Fast forward to 2020, and the game and franchise have evolved substantially, not always for the better. But I do find it so intriguing, with a skeptical kind of adoration. It’s not nearly as well-supported as Magic, but what it does have are gigantic anime monsters on tiny cards with enough lines of text to make your head spin. And it’s so interesting to me that a franchise like that can continue to thrive alongside more elegant games like the Pokemon TCG and Hearthstone. And the further I’ve delved into how the game has changed since I stopped playing, the more invested I’ve become, going so far as to start buying cards again and looking into possible decks I might enjoy playing. An unequivocal win for Yu-Gi-Oh! is Speed Duel, which seeks to bring old players back to the game with a watered-down, nostalgia-laden format with fewer mechanics and a much smaller card pool. So if all you want to do is pit a Blue Eyes White Dragon against a Dark Magician, that’s 100% still there for you, but the competitive scene is still alive, well, and astoundingly complicated. And I think that’s kind of beautiful.

Black Mesa

I wasn’t expecting to have the tech to play Half Life: Alyx this year, so Black Mesa seemed like the next best thing. And it really is a love letter to the first game, even if it’s far from perfect. I even prefer the original, but I did very much enjoy my time with this modern reimagining. If you’ve never played a Half Life game before, I think it’s a great place to start.

VR via the Oculus Quest

Around halfway through this year, I started to get really stir crazy and yeah, pretty depressed. It seemed like I’d be stuck in the same boring cycle forever, and I know for a lot of people, it still feels like that. So VR seemed like the perfect escape from this dubious reality where you can’t even take a safe vacation trip anymore. And you know, I think it works really well for that purpose. The Oculus Quest is especially effective, doing away with cords or cables so you have as much freedom as you have free real estate in your home. I don’t have a lot of space in my studio apartment, but I have enough to see the potential of the medium, which is completely worth it. Next gen consoles are neat and all, but I’ve got my heart set on picking up the Quest 2 as soon as possible.

* Beat Saber

I was most looking forward to trying Beat Saber on the Quest, and I was not disappointed. You’d think rhythm games had reached their peak with Rock Band and DDR, but the genre keeps on giving with gems like this. It’s hard to convey if you’ve never tried it, but the game succeeds so well in getting your entire body into the rhythm of whatever song you’re slashing through.

* Half Life: Alyx

Again, I really did not expect to be able to experience this game as intended this year, and I still don’t think I really have. The Oculus Link for the Quest is admittedly a little janky, and my PC barely meets the minimum specs to even run the game. And yet, despite that, Alyx is one of my top three games of 2020 and maybe one of my all-time favorites. Even as I was losing frames and feeling the game struggle to keep up with all the AI Combine soldiers running around, I was still having a blast. For me, it is one of the best reasons to seek out and own VR and a pinnacle of game design in its own right.

Hades

For me, Hades has mostly been similar to every other Supergiant Game that I’ve played: fun and well-polished but ultimately not engaging enough to play for very long. And there’s always this sheen of trying to be too clever with their dialogue, narration, and music that rubs me the wrong way. But Hades is certainly their best game, and I can’t deny the effect it’s had on people, much like Bastion’s reception back in 2011. And I’m really hoping Hades gets more people into roguelikes, as a more accessible and story-driven approach to the genre. Timing-wise, I wish it hadn’t come out around the same time as Spelunky, because I think it did make some people choose one over the other, when the best choice is to play both and realize they’re going for very different experiences. The precise, unforgiving, arcade-like style of Spelunky isn’t fun for everyone, though, and Hades is thankfully there to fill in that gap. I’m really glad I found more time to play it this year at least to succeed on one escape attempt; it’s a fun game to think about in a game design context. And I do think the game has a lot of merit and is doing some clever things with difficulty that the studio likely could not have honed nearly so well without the help of Early Access. The most impressive part of the game to me is not the story or the music or the combat but the massive amount of contextual dialogue they somehow found time to program, write, and record at a consistently high level. All of this is just to say, Hades is obviously one of the best games of the year, and you should play it if you have any interest in it at all.

Spelunky 2

I’ve spoken a lot about this game on Twitter, so I’m not going to rehash much of that here. For me, it’s been a journey of over 1,000 attempts to learn the intricacies and secrets of a deep and demanding game that’s been as frustrating as it’s been rewarding. But it remains a constant source of learning and discovery as well as mastery and pride for me, and I still have hopes of reaching the Cosmic Ocean and getting all the trophies someday. It’s been a joy to watch other Spelunky players too, even as some fair worse than me and others fair far better. And the Daily challenge keeps me coming back, because seeing my name high up on the leaderboard just makes me feel so damn good (or at least I’ll get a good laugh out of a hilarious death). At its heart, Spelunky is a community endeavor, and I think it succeeds at that better than almost any other game this side of Dark Souls. I think it is my Game of the Year or at least tied with Alyx, I really can’t decide. If you don’t think you’d enjoy it, all I’ll say is, the frustration and difficulty are integral to the experience of discovery and surprise, and your brain is better at video games than you think.

Chess

Okay, yes, I watched and enjoyed The Queen’s Gambit, but I think 2020 had already primed people to get into chess this year regardless. Like Yu-Gi-Oh!, chess was a childhood pastime of mine that I really enjoyed and then quickly left behind as I discovered things like music and the internet. If I had to assign a theme to my 2020, it would be rediscovering old hobbies to remind myself how good life actually is. And now I’m more committed to chess than I ever was before. I’m watching international masters and grand masters on YouTube (as well as the incomparable Northernlion), I’m playing regularly on Chess.com, and I’m even paying for lessons and probably my own theory books soon. Like most fighting games, chess is a complicated form of dueling a single opponent with zero randomness, so mistakes are always on you. And modern chess platforms offer extremely good analysis tools, showing you exactly how, when, and why you screwed up so you can do better next time. Like Hearthstone, it’s a quick, addicting, tense, and rewarding way to train your brain and have fun. And it seems more popular now than ever, in part due to a certain Netflix original TV show...

TV

The Queen’s Gambit

I think a lot of people want to be Beth Harmon, even if they know they shouldn’t. It must feel so good to be the best at something and know you’re the best, even while under the influence of certain substances. It’s what makes characters like Dr. Gregory House so fun to watch, though you’d never want to work with the guy. For me, anyway, I always wanted to be a prodigy at something, and what little success I’ve had made The Queen’s Gambit very relatable to me. More so, it’s easy to relate to growing up in a conservative environment with few real friends and fewer outlets of expression, only to realize you’ve finally found your thing, and that no one can take it from you. That’s mostly what I’m going to take from The Queen’s Gambit anyway, more than chess or the Cold War commentary or the problematic relationships Beth has with her cadre of rivals/boyfriends. The show gets a strong recommendation from me for fans of chess as well as lovers of optimistic coming-of-age stories.

March Comes in Like a Lion

Similarly, March Comes in Like a Lion features a protagonist who is scarily close to a version of myself from like eight years ago. My best friend has been urging me to watch this show for years, and I’m still only a few episodes in. But I love how it portrays a young person who’s moved to a big city away from home for the first time, with nothing more than some meager possessions and the hopes of becoming the best in the world at something. And Rei is not confident in himself or outgoing at all, he’s extremely depressed despite pursuing his dreams and trying to distance himself from his somewhat toxic family. It’s a great reminder that the smallest kindnesses can often change our entire perspective on the world, and that even the people that seem the most well-equipped to handle life often still need help. I’ve been very fortunate to have people like that despite mistakes I’ve made, and I hope to be that person for others too.

Umbrella Academy

I’m pretty burnt out on superheroes, but UA put a good enough spin on them that they felt brand new. The show is rough in places, but it’s surprising in some really clever ways. And the comics are some of the wildest stories I’ve ever read, like Hitchhiker’s Guide meets Watchmen.

HunterXHunter

I binged about 100 of the 148 episodes of HxH this year, which I recognize is not a significant number in the wider world of long-running shounen anime, but it’s quite an undertaking for me to finish a show of this length. The series goes places I never expected and made me care so strongly for characters I thought I’d hate at first. It’s the smartest and most endearing show about a band of misfits going on crazy adventures and punching people for the good of the world that you’re likely to find.

Hannibal

This is the rare show that’s simultaneously comforting and nightmare-inducing if watched for extended periods. I can remember nights after binging a few episodes where I couldn’t get many of the disturbing images out of my head. Fair to say, Hannibal is not for the faint of heart, nor is it without some low points. But for those who enjoy gory thrillers or gritty detective dramas, it’s a must-watch. 

Yu-Gi-Oh! Original Series, English Sub

You can probably imagine my surprise as I discovered this year that the Japanese version of the Yu-Gi-Oh! anime is not only much better than the 4Kids version we got in the States, but it’s actually a decent show. The plot makes much more sense, it’s more interesting, the stakes are higher, the voices are better, and overall it’s just more enjoyable to watch. I don’t know if I’ll stick with it long enough to finish it this time, but this is definitely the way I’d do it and would recommend to others.

Fargo Season 4

It’s a miracle we even got another season of Fargo this year, let alone on time and of the same high quality as the first two seasons. It has a great setting, cast, and conflict. I love Chris Rock, and it was so cool to see him act so well in such a serious role. There’s a Wizard of Oz homage episode that is nearly flawless. And the post-credits scene at the end of the season is just the cherry on top. If you haven’t checked out Fargo by now, you are really missing out on some of the most interesting stuff happening in TV. I can’t wait to see what Noah Hawley does with the Alien franchise.

Movies

Cats

I had to include this one because it was the last full movie I saw in theaters before the pandemic hit. I technically went to Sonic too, but my friends and I walked out after about 30 minutes. The less said about that movie, the better. Cats, though, is a strange and curious beast (pun intended), adapting an already unruly animal (pun intended) to the big screen and yowling to be recognized (pun intended). But for every awkward or embarrassing scene, there’s one of pure joy and magic, like the extended ballet sequence or Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat. The film knows exactly what it is and leans into it hard, like a familiar yet slightly insane feline begging to be stroked, which I imagine is exactly what fans of the musical wanted.

Children of Men

There’s not much I can say about this film that probably hasn’t been said better elsewhere. I was intrigued to watch it when I learned it was one of my friend’s favorite movies. And I have to say, it’s really profound in a prescient way. Clive Owen gives one of the best performances I’ve ever seen. You should watch it, but only when you feel like taking a severe hit to the feels.

Basic Instinct

Vertigo is probably still my favorite film, so when I learned this year that Paul Verhoeven made a bloody, sex romp homage film to it in the 90s with Michael Douglas starring, I simply had to watch it. And you know, it’s not bad. It’s nowhere near as good as Vertigo, and you can see the ending coming a mile away. But what it does have is the immaculate Sharon Stone, who you cannot take your eyes off for the entire movie. And the movie knows it, making her look as alluring and suggestive as her character is to the detective investigating her. You could do worse than to watch it, just don’t expect any of Hitchcock’s subtlety or looming dread to seep into the final product.

Books

Dune

I finally finished Dune this year, and I can genuinely say it lives up to the hype. It’s not the easiest book to get through, but it’s by no means one of the most difficult either. I’m still bummed that the new film was delayed, but it might give me time to read the rest of the original book series.

The Fifth Season

Another fantastic piece of fiction, I cannot recommend this book enough. N.K. Jemisin is one of the best living authors of our time. If you want an original setting with a brilliant magic system and complex, compelling characters, look no further.

Video Content

Northernlion

I’ve been a fan of NL for years, though I’ve never been that into The Binding of Isaac. He just has a charismatic intelligence to him that sets him apart from most “Let’s Play” YouTubers to me, and he’s very funny to boot. I guess I’d say he seems a lot like me or the person I could picture myself being if I were a professional video content creator. So I was really excited for NL’s series of Spelunky 2 videos, and I still watch them every day, months later. And now he’s teaching me how to get better at chess, being a good 600 ELO higher than myself at the moment. His sarcastic and improv-laden banter have withstood the test of years and gave me some much-needed comfort and laughter in 2020. Somehow, the man even found a way to keep up his prolific output this year while raising his firstborn child. There are those who said it couldn’t be done...

The Command Zone - Game Knights

Josh Lee Kwai and the rest of the crew at The Command Zone continue to put out some of the most well-produced tabletop gameplay videos on the internet. It’s perhaps no surprise, seeing as how Lee Kwai created trailers for such blockbuster films as Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World and Jimmy Wong had a supporting role in the live action remake of Disney’s Mulan. But the crew around the two hosts are just as important and talented, and it’s clear that they all share the same singular vision for the channel’s future. They’ve carefully crafted a team of expert editors, animators, cosplayers, and voice actors to deliver one delightful video after the next at a consistently high level. If you’re into Magic: the Gathering at all, you simply need to watch Game Knights.

Cimoooooooo

I found Alex Cimo’s channel shortly after the algorithm learned I was interested in Yu-Gi-Oh! again, and at first, I was less than impressed with him. But it’s clear to me now that he not only loves what he does, he’s an expert Yu-Gi-Oh! player and analyst. Plus, he’s very good at explaining some of the more complex concepts in the game in a way that newcomers can understand. I’ve watched every new episode of The Progression Series and The History of Yu-Gi-Oh! so far, and they’re the best way I’ve found to learn how the game developed and changed over the last 20 years.

Team APS

This is another great Yu-Gi-Oh! channel, focusing more on skits, gimmick videos, and casual games rather than analytical or theoretical content. Mostly, they seem like a really great group of friends that just have a blast playing Yu-Gi-Oh! together, and their love for the game makes me want to play more too.

Tolarian Community College

Somehow, a community college English professor’s channel went from a quirky little deckbox review platform to the most popular Magic: the Gathering channel on YouTube in only a few years. But it’s easy to see why when Brian clearly loves what he’s doing more than most people ever will. He’s not only a fantastic reviewer and MtG scholar, he’s one of the most outspoken voices for positive change in the community and the game. Is he too hard on the Magic team at Wizards of the Coast? Perhaps, but without his measured and well-reasoned takes on all things Magic, I think we’d be much worse off.

IRL

Cooking

Even I get tired of eating the same things every day, so I’ve taken it upon myself to learn how to make more dishes, mostly out of sheer boredom. And I know I’m not alone in that, but I have to say it’s been a rewarding and fun adventure. It’s really surprising what you can throw together with a decent recipe and a little creativity in a modest kitchen when you decide to break away from the microwave for once.

Chinchillin’

Like many people, I felt that I needed a pet to survive this year, and I’ve always wanted a chinchilla. So I took a risk and bought one from a seller on KSL a few months ago, and my life has definitely changed for the better. No longer simply alone with my thoughts all day, I have a furry little companion to commune and bond with. And it’s more difficult to find time to feel sorry for myself when a basically helpless tiny creature depends on me for almost everything. Not to say it’s been a perfect experience however, people don’t say chins are difficult to care for for nothing. And I have learned more about them than perhaps I ever cared to know before, but that’s only made them more interesting to me as a result. Overall, I would recommend them as pets, just be prepared to give them a lot more time and attention than you would to say, a fish or a hamster. I’ve seen the commitment compared to that of a large dog, and I think that’s fair, though chins seem far more difficult to train and are far less cuddly. Basically, imagine a fluffy, super fast squirrel that can jump half your height, shed its fur at will if grabbed too tightly, that sleeps all day and bathes in dust, and that cannot get wet or too hot or eat 99% of human foods without serious complications. And they get lonely, and they all have their own surprisingly distinct personalities, some shy and mischievous, others bright and social, and everything in between. But I’m glad to be part of my little buddy’s life and hope to make it a long and enjoyable one for him. Part of why I wanted a chinchilla so badly is they typically live between 10-20 years, much longer than the average rodent or even many cats and dogs. And they’re sadly endangered in the wild, poached for their incredibly soft fur, which is why I believe it’s critical that we care for and learn more about them now. And above all, I adore my chinchilla’s antics, even when he continually tries to dig up and eat the paper bedding below his cage when I’ve provided perfectly edible hay and pellets for him in much easier to reach locations.

And that’s all, folks...

If you’ve read this far, know that I really appreciate it and hope you learned something new about yourself, art, or the world. And please do let me know what’s kept you going the most this year too, as I suspect I’ll still be searching for new distractions next year, even after I’m able to get a Covid vaccine injection. As Red Green would say, we’re all in this together, and I’m pullin’ for ya. <3

[ginnyzero]

Completely Harmless Appendix 8

The Golden Hills Valley

Oh, the Golden Hills that aren’t really golden. Okay, so um, this is personal pet peeve and I know there are a lot of players that actually like the Golden Hills being an area of eternal autumn while the rest of the game is eternal summer except for the Valley of the Hidden Dinosaur. (Where nothing should be growing at all, so now it’s not growing anything except some super hardy magical thistles and lichen and that’s all I’m going to say about that.) And I get why they did it initially because they were using the old assets from the Seasonal games and it was a good way to recycle the Autumn Riders assets.

Completely unnecessary but I get it.

I simply don’t like that our Golden Hills are “red.”

So, I changed it. Instead of having maples, maples, everywhere. I know that birches grow fast and take over areas pretty quickly, so I decided that it didn’t make any sense for the birch forest not to continue into the part of Golden Hills that we see.

Then as you unlock more of the Golden Hills (that are only locked due to actual plot reasons) the trees change into beeches and aspens. And what birches, beeches, and aspens have in common is that they all turn yellow in the fall. I also included Golden Chain Trees. During the spring and summer they have trailing yellow flower clusters.

Apparently the Golden Chain tree turns orange and red a bit during the fall but bits of orange and red are better than all orange and red. Which is what Maple trees do. A lot of it also does have to do with soil composition, rainfall (and thus amount of sap) and light, but for the most part, maples turn red and orange. (If your maple leaves are turning yellow in the fall, there actually might be a problem with your maple tree.) While Apsens, Birches, and Beeches turn yellow.

So, thus, the Golden Hills would actually look Golden.

Then I researched for a bunch of yellow flowers and yellow-green foliage bushes to fill in the gaps during the spring and summer to make the Golden Hills yellow all year long.

The Northern Golden Hills, by the way, didn’t exist in the Star Stable Autumn and Winter games map. When you played Star Stable: Winter Rider, you could go up the mountain behind Meander Stable and look over Silverglade. It was really cool actually. However, when Star Stable Online added in the Valley of the Hidden Dinosaur, they created magic space and therefore pushed the Pine Hills area further north and created this area we now know nothing about.

So I made it up.

When I got to the point in the story where we needed to get past Castle Marchenghast, I asked my good friend, Becca, what she wanted to see in the Northern Golden Hills. And she pointed out that if we’re in a county, we don’t actually have anything that could be considered a County Seat. This was actually really helpful for me.

I grew up on the borders of what are two very rural counties with one huge town in them. So, I based the Northern Golden Hills on the one without a university and is slightly more rural.

So, I created a County Seat. The County Seat would have things like the Fair Grounds, a major station for the Jorvik Rangers, and the big courthouse, and even a jail. The Beeches Park is a green forested state park like area with playgrounds and a event pavilion and little pavilions you can rent for families to visit and throw little parties, let their kids play type of thing. There should also be a library, a school, a natural golf course, and so on. I decided that there should be a Baron for the Golden Hills District and the Count of the entire South New Jorvik County would also live in the Golden Hills at Castle Marchenghast.

Given Star Stable Online’s naming conventions it meant the Marchenghast Family was the highest ranking noble family in the area. I created another Baron, Baron Arthur Fairhaven, and he has his own castle, stable, and village. And lastly, I created Aspendell.

Yes, I know, a lot of A names to go with the A names already in the game, but I liked the name Arthur Fairhaven too much to let it go. It’s a fanfic. I can indulge in silliness.

The cool thing about Aspens is that they aren’t a bunch of individual genetically different trees. They aren’t siblings. Aspens send out roots under the soil laterally and from these roots grow more trunks. So, Aspens are actually one giant clone of each other. They are one complex organism communicating with each other via their roots. You know, like in James Cameron’s Avatar.

Due to drought and fires, there are several Aspen forests, one I know of in Britain, that are considered endangered. I thought it’d be neat to have an Aspen forest like that in Star Stable to bring attention or awareness to the area. Even if I wasn’t able to address directly in this “Chapter” of the story.

The other village in the North Golden Hills area is Eventide, a fishing village. Not a port, but a sea side fishing community that doesn’t have their own stable. I also added a privately owned vineyard to be competition or a new ally in the South New Jorvik County wine trail.

BEHOLD A HANDY LIST

Golden Hills Valley Past North Link/Castle Marchenghast

It’s the County Seat - Goldcroft

1.     Court House

2.     Jail

3.    Ranger Station

4.     Fire House

5.    Count Marchenghast Manor

6.    Goldcroft Stables

7.     Library

8.    Big Recreational Park (The Beeches)

9.    Camping Area/Natural Golf Course

10.  Event Concert Area/Oval Race Track/Rodeo Event Space near Fair Grounds

11.    Golden Hills School

12.   Goldcroft Riding Arena

13.   County Fair Grounds

14.   Large Town including Shopping Street Area (Goldcroft)

15.   Town Square Shopping (Goldcroft)

16.   Large Regional Post Office

17.   Castle Marchenghast Stable

18.   A Medium Sized Stable of Golden Hills Baron Fairhaven

19.   A Smaller Stable (Aspendell)

20.  Protected Quivering Aspen Forest (Shimmering Woods)

21.   Aurora Breeze Winery (Privately owned, no stable.)

22.  Farm 1 (county seat Goldcroft)

23.  Farm 2 (county seat Goldcroft)

24.   Farm 3 (village Fairhaven)

25.  Farm 4 (village Fairhaven)

26.  Farm 5 (village Fairhaven)

27.   Village Fairhaven(3 of 5 farms, Medium Stable, home of Golden Hills Baron)

28.  Village Aspendell (Small Stable)

29.  Fairhaven Riding Arena

30. Eventide Fishing Village

FOR THE ACCOMPANYING IMAGES PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE MY WATERMARK AND CONTACT INFORMATION. THANK YOU. I get it. Some of you might get excited and want to see this stuff in the game, especially the clothes, tack, and pets. However, the only way I want to see this in the game is if I get paid for it. If I see it in the game and I’m not paid for it, there will be hell to pay. You think I’m salty. I’d be angry. Personally, I’m not going to send this info to SSO. If you do, leave my contact information there! Don’t give them any excuses to steal.

Now, I’ll know you haven’t read this note if you leave me comments about how ‘salty’ I am about the game and if I hate it so much I should do something else. I am doing something else. It’s called Mystic Riders MMORPG Project. Mystic Riders however is a very baby phase game. You can check out our plans on the game dev blog. (Skills, Factions, Professions, Crafting, Mini-Games, 25+ horse breeds!) If you know anyone who would be interested and has money or contacts about game making, direct them to the blog.

[asoulofstars]

Logical vs Emotional

Listen, y’all know that I gotta emotionally torture Sawyer. So have him be the pining wreck while Riona’s out on the raft. First half of this is Riona’s POV, and second half is Sawyer’s. There’s one scene that gets into nsfw territory, so if m/f nsfw skeeves you out, probably just skip past the end.

This also features @niceofthenine‘s OC, Artemis, because Artemis is so much fun and acts as sort of a middle ground between Riona and Kate, especially in regards to Sawyer.

           Riona was a lab rat. But she was also an FBI trained lab rat. And she knew that someone with proper training should be on that raft. Because being alone in the middle of the ocean when they knew that there were Others was a bad idea. So, when Michael came up with the raft idea, she went to him, and she asked to go with him. He accepted her logic, and he agreed that she could sail with him and Walt.

           Sawyer was surprisingly not on board with her plan.

           “You already said you’ve never shot at anythin’ but paper! What do you think you’re gonna do if y’all run into trouble out there? You ain’t the only one who knows their way around a gun, Princess!” He was practically glaring down at her.

           “If I have to shoot someone to protect the people I care about, I will,” Riona replied, eyes fiery. “What do you even care?”

           “I care about you, Princess. Goin’ off an’ doin’ somethin’ dangerous! I….You could get hurt out there.” He ran a hand through his hair.

           Riona softened, and she stepped closer to him. “It’s a risk, Sawyer. I know that. But I also know that if you were the one going out, and if I asked you not to go, you wouldn’t stay. No matter how worried I would be about you, if you thought you should be on that raft, you would be. So…let me be on that raft. Because it just makes sense.”

           He pulled her into his arms. “Okay, Princess. But you gotta be careful out there.”

           “I’m not you,” she replied, nuzzling him. “I am careful.”

           “Alright, I guess that’s fair.” He kissed the top of her head. “But still.”

           Riona smiled at him, and she put a hand on his cheek. “You worried about me?”

           His hand covered hers, and his eyes were soft. “Yeah, Princess. I am. Nothin’ on this Island seems to go right.”

           “We’ve still got a lot to do before we sail. May I have some things from your stash to help Michael build it?” She gave him her big puppy eyes look.

           He sighed and squeezed the hand she still had on his cheek. “I guess I could do that for you.”

           “Thank you.” She rolled up on tiptoes and kissed his other cheek.

~*~

           “Come here.” Sawyer pulled her into his arms.

           Riona wrapped her arms around him and settled into him as best she could. “I’m going to miss you,” she mumbled.

           Sawyer kissed the top of her head. “I’m gonna miss you, too,” he replied. “Any chance I can convince you to stay?”

           Riona looked up at him and kissed his jaw. “I just don’t feel right having anyone else go,” she said. “It’ll be dangerous; I know that. But someone with training should be out there.”

           “I’m no good with words, Princess, but…come back, won’t you?” He looked down at her, peridot eyes searching hers.

           “Of course I will,” she replied. “You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”

           He chuckled. “Mmm. Is that so?”

           “I think we established this already,” she said, nodding into his chest.

           He didn’t answer, but she could feel his smile against the top of her head as he pulled her close again. She fell asleep to his heartbeat under her ear.

~*~

           The next day, they were ready to set sail. She could feel Sawyer’s eyes on her, and part of her wanted to stay. But she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was needed on the raft. She found him in the crowd, and she pulled him into the tightest hug that she could muster.

           “Be safe, Princess,” he mumbled against her skin. “Come home.”

           “I will,” she promised with her cheek pressed into his chest.

           “Let’s go!” Michael called.

           Riona sucked in a breath as Sawyer pulled back, and even as they made it into the water, sail expanding, she kept her eyes on him. She already missed him, and she pulled the button-up he’d given her tighter around herself. It smelled like him, and she felt her heart ache.

~*~

           Things went downhill fast. The rudder broke off, and Riona managed to jump into the water and grab it. Michael pulled her back on, and he handed her Sawyer’s shirt.

           “How badly you miss him?” he asked.

           Riona flushed, pulling the shirt tight around her. “He means the world to me,” she whispered. “I know no one gets that, but….” She shrugged.

           Michael smiled at her. “He’ll never admit it, but you do rub off on him. He’s gotten a bit better since we crashed.”

           She smiled back. She did notice that he tried a little more as time went on, and she definitely noticed how he would pull her closer and be the one to initiate cuddling. She was so in love with him, and she knew that he would never feel the same way. But that didn’t mean that she wasn’t head over heels for him.

~*~

           Night had fallen, and Riona looked up at the stars. She’d been mapping the sky for weeks, and she loved it. It was so clear, and she could see every star. She wondered if Sawyer was awake, looking at them too.

           The raft was silent, until Riona looked over at the scanner Sayid had given them.

           “It’s about time, isn’t it?” she asked.

           Michael shifted. “What if it runs out of battery?” he asked.

           “Sayid said every hour,” she replied gently. “I know we could be gone for a while, but we should listen. He knows more about electronics than I ever will.”

           Michael nodded and flipped the switch, and they watched the screen. Just before he moved to turn it off, a beep began, picking up something. Riona’s chest tightened. Could it be? So close?

           They argued over whether to use the flare gun or not, but Walt swayed Michael in the end. They fired the flare, and the beeping disappeared for a second. And then it came back. They embraced; Riona was starting to cry. It was a boat!

           But as the boat came up to them, flood light turning onto the raft, Riona’s everything froze. There was something off about this. And she was proven right.

           “We’re gonna have to take the boy.”

           She took a deep breath, held it for a second, and exhaled as she reached for the gun she was hiding. The flood light turned off, and before she could grab her sidearm, she was shot in the shoulder and went overboard.

~*~

           After a few days of walking, Riona knew that she wasn’t going to make it back to camp. She knew the body; she knew that the infection to her shoulder was fatal. She tugged on Michael’s sleeve.

           “What is it?” he asked.

           “He doesn’t know I love him,” she whispered, tearing up. “I…I don’t think I’m going to see him again. I…make sure he knows that. And don’t let him blame himself.”

           “Riona, you’re going to be okay,” Michael said.

           She gave him a weak smile. “Just because I’m not a medical doctor doesn’t mean I don’t know the human body. I’m going septic. This infection is going to kill me. And I don’t think that I’m going to have the strength to get back to our camp. So…I need you to promise me that you’ll tell him.”

           “Only if you can’t,” Michael replied. “But I’m getting you back to Jack.”

           Riona only could hope that Michael’s optimism wasn’t blind.

~*~

           Sawyer found himself spending most of his time with Kate. She was taken aback at first, but it didn’t take her long to realize that he was pretty lost without Riona by his side at all times. Artemis seemed to enjoy his new social side, and they were practically strutting as they walked around with him and Kate. He started to pull them into his arms, and it was this motion that caught Kate’s attention.

           “You got used to her,” Kate teased.

           “Hard not to get used to her when she would jus’ climb into my lap,” he replied.

           He let out a sigh and stared out over the water, running his fingers through his hair. Artemis glanced up at him, but he didn’t meet their gaze. He wanted her back. He hated himself for just…letting her go. The night before she left, he’d sort of asked her to stay. But he should have asked her for real. She shouldn’t be out there. Maybe he wasn’t the best choice, either, but he would much rather be the one out there than the one here missing her.

           “Hard not to get used to her when you fall in love with her,” Artemis retorted.

           “You know she’s been thinking about you, too, right?” Kate asked him.

           His lips quirked upward, but the beginnings of his smile faded as he glanced at her and tore his gaze from the ocean. He didn’t believe in signs or magic, but he just had this pit in his stomach that he couldn’t shake.

           “What’s wrong?” she asked.

           “I don’ know.” He ran his fingers through his hair again, tugging a little at the ends. “I just…I wish I hadn’t let her go. I’ve got a bad feeling, Freckles.”

           Kate frowned. He knew it was probably irrational, but he’d been feeling more and more nauseous for days now, and that was the only explanation he had for it.

           “Okay, come on. We’re going and doing something fun.”

           He eyed her skeptically, but Artemis wiggled out of his grasp and grabbed his hand.

           “Fun will be good for you!” They pulled him after Kate.

~*~

           It was how he found himself with Artemis, Charlie, and Hurley watching Kate send golf balls flying all over camp. He had to admit, it was fun. He enjoyed watching her surpass expectations and steal Hurley’s supposed money. Of course, he could have been a millionaire himself, but he opted out of that, instead doing something for Clementine. So, maybe Hurley had the kind of money he was promising Kate. Artemis was back in his arms, fulfilling the aching hole left from not having Princess in his grasp. He really hated that she made him so vulnerable, so aware of all the things that he normally didn’t care about.

           Sawyer watched as Jack walked up, and he tried not to frown. He saw Kate flash him a warning look, and he rolled his eyes at her. Artemis shifted in his arms, and he sighed at them when he caught their look, too. He would play nice if the Doc didn’t come at him first.

           “Try keeping your left arm straight. You’re hooking it,” Jack told Kate.

           “Are you giving me tips?” Kate asked him.

           “I’m…I’m a doctor,” Jack answered as if it explained everything.

           Sawyer snorted. It was just one of many condescending sentences that had fallen from the Doc’s mouth.

           “Be nice.” Artemis elbowed him.

           “Right back at you, Elf,” he replied with a groan.

           “Anyone can hit a ball,” Jack told Kate. “That’s not golf. Golf is accuracy.”

           “Well, why don’t we play a few holes and see which of us is more accurate?” she retorted.

~*~

           “Princess?” Sawyer stared through the trees at the man who had the unmistakable—to him—form of Riona draped over his shoulders. “Princess!” He stepped forward. “What the hell happened to her?” he growled.

           “Where is the doctor?” the man asked.

           Jack stepped up. “I’m the doctor,” he said. “Come with me.”

           Sawyer took Riona from the man, holding her carefully in his arms. He focused on the rise and fall of her chest, trying to keep himself calm by knowing that she was still alive.

           “Doc, she’s gonna be okay, right?” he asked as they made their way to the hatch.

           “I have no idea how bad her wound is,” Jack said.

           “Well, you gotta fix her,” Sawyer growled.

           He couldn’t lose her. He couldn’t. Not now. His heart was pounding in his chest, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. He looked at Jack, trying to analyze the doctor’s face for some insight into Riona’s condition, but Jack gave nothing away.

           “We need to get her in the shower; bring the fever down,” Jack instructed as they entered the hatch.

           Sawyer set her gently on the shower floor, and he watched helplessly as Jack turned the shower to cold and let the water spill over her. He finally got a good look at her, from the way that his now ruined shirt clung to her to the wound in her shoulder that looked so…dead. He shook, swallowing the lump that made its way into his throat.

           “What can I do?” he asked Jack.

           “I need the bed stripped with clean sheets, and I need Ofloxacin. Now.”

           Sawyer nodded, and even though he felt a sharp stab in his chest as he tore his gaze from Riona, he knew that if he didn’t help, he was going to break down. He did as Jack asked, and then he walked back into the bathroom. Jack was pulling Riona’s shoes off and peeling her out of clothes.

           “Leave her top on,” Sawyer said. “She’s…she wears long sleeves for a reason.”

           “She’s too hot,” Jack replied. “If we have any chance of saving her, we have to get this fever down.”

           Sawyer watched as Jack cut up the long sleeve that Riona had half-stolen (she’d been wearing it before he told her to keep it for the raft), and he felt his entire body freeze when he saw the wound. He didn’t know medical things. He wasn’t a doctor. But he knew that her gunshot wound was worse than when he’d been stabbed after Sayid tortured him. And he had been lucky to survive that. Jack then cut away the tank top she wore underneath, leaving Riona in just a bra and her underwear.

           “Princess, come back to me,” he whispered.

           “Help me get her into the bed.”

           Jack took her feet, and Sawyer held her upright, feeling her back against his chest, and helping her sit up while Jack got the Ofloxacin and some water. He pressed his forehead against the top of her head, sending out a million pleas to a million stars, knowing that there was nothing in this universe that he could actually do to keep her with him.

           He looked over Jack’s shoulder to see Kate and Artemis, both with wide-eyes, and he pressed against Riona again. He couldn’t stand to see them so worried, so scared, because that’s all he felt, too. And he had to keep it together, at least until they finally left him alone with her.

           Jack tried to get Riona to take the pill, but Riona didn’t swallow it. Sawyer kissed the top of her head.

           “Princess,” he said softly. “You gotta take this pill. It’s gonna make you better. You promised me you’d be safe, that you’d come back. I don’ wanna lose you. Come on, Princess. You can do it.” He looked at Jack and held out his hand for the pill.

           To his surprise, Jack gave it to him, and Sawyer kissed the top of Riona’s head again.

           “Okay, come on. Here it is.” He gave Riona the pill, took the water from Jack, and started pouring it slowly. “Come on, Princess. Swallow.”

           She did, and his hand shook as he handed the glass back to Jack. He closed his eyes, and he held Riona close to him.

           “Sawyer, we’ll be outside if you need us,” Kate said gently.

           “She’ll be okay,” Artemis assured him, and he felt their lips against his cheek.

           “Thanks,” he whispered. “Both of you.”

           He ran his fingers through Riona’s hair, pressed his forehead to the top of her head, and he let the tears that he’d been holding back escape.

           “Please don’t leave me,” he begged, swallowing hard.

~*~

           He leaned against the wall as Jack cleaned Riona’s wound. Jack had tried to get him to get out of the hatch, but Sawyer wasn’t leaving Riona for a second. Kate and Artemis were out getting Riona some fruit. He winced as Riona groaned.

           “Princess, it’s okay,” Sawyer told her. “Doc’s just fixing you up.”

           “Sawyer,” she mumbled.

           He moved closer, and he took Riona’s hand in his. “I’m right here, Princess. Promise.” He kissed her knuckles.

           “Sawyer,” she said again.

           “I’m here,” he repeated. “Not goin’ anywhere.”

           He looked up as Kate and Artemis came back in, and he gave them a weak smile.

           “Have you slept?” Artemis looked at him.

           He just shook his head. He couldn’t remember how long it had been. How could he sleep? He had to make sure Riona pulled through.

           “Y’all should get down to the beach,” he said gruffly. “I can mash up some of that fruit.”

           “Remember the button,” Jack said gently. “Try and keep her cool.”

           Sawyer nodded. He glanced at Kate and Artemis, and he gave Artemis a weak smile when they came over and hugged him. He nuzzled them and gave them a quick squeeze.

           “Thanks, Elf.”

           “Sawyer, try and get some rest,” Jack told him. “She’s not going anywhere, so it’s okay for you to sleep.”

           Sawyer didn’t respond and settled in next to Riona.

~*~

           He wasn’t good with words. Not when he wanted to be honest, anyways. He was good with scripts. He knew how to push people’s buttons, how to seduce people, how to make them believe him. But he didn’t know what to say when the woman he loved was on the brink of death and all he wanted was for her to come back.

           “Princess,” he said gently. “Please don’t leave me. Come back.”

           He held her right hand in both of his. He wasn’t religious; he didn’t have any kind of God to pray to. But he needed her, and no matter how much he didn’t think he deserved her, no matter how much he hated that she made him feel like a real person again, he knew that losing her would destroy him, and he knew he wanted to tell her how he felt.

           “Riona, I love you,” he whispered. “I love you so much. Please, Princess, don’ leave me.”

           Riona let out a small whine. “You mean that?” she asked, voice a little hoarse.

           “Princess?” He looked up at her, and his breath caught in his throat when her emerald eyes met his gaze. “Fuck, Princess,” he breathed.

           She gave him a weak smile, and he squeezed her hand tight.

           “Did you mean it?” she asked again.

           “Yeah,” he whispered. “Yeah, Princess, I…love you. I am so damn in love with you. Fuck, I think I managed to drive Freckles and Elf insane while you were gone, because I jus’ didn’ know what to do without you in my arms. I get it, y’know, if you don’—”

           “Sawyer, I love you, too. Do you remember when you took me out to that waterfall to swim? I…I think that was our first date. It was just…so much fun, and you were so open and carefree, and I knew I was in love with you. But…I think I was in love with you before that even.”

           Tears formed in his eyes as she talked, and when she finished, he leaned up and kissed her gently. He couldn’t help but smile against her lips as she tried to get her right hand out of his grasp to pull him closer. The kiss grew more passionate, and he moaned as her fingers scratched at him while also trying to force his shirt buttons open one-handed.

           “Princess,” he growled. “You almost died.”

           “And I know my body,” she replied. “It’s not like I can really do much with my left arm, and I seem to be in an actual bed, so shouldn’t we take advantage of that?”

           He really couldn’t argue with her logic, and he took her face in his hands as he kissed her again.

~*~

           He had just reset the button’s timer, and then he went back to attend to his girlfriend. He settled between her thighs, and he grinned when she coiled and then immediately just melted as his tongue flicked against her clit.

           He loved eating women out, and he enjoyed how she tasted like the ocean. But what he enjoyed most was the way that she practically cried, how her voice cracked and pleaded, the way that his name came out like a prayer.

           “What the fuck?” Jack’s voice broke into their bubble.

           Sawyer grumbled against Riona’s thighs and extracted himself from the blankets. “Really, Doc? Couldn’ have knocked or anythin’?” he asked.

           “Get dressed,” Jack ordered.

           “Give us half an hour,” Riona replied, grinning lazily at Sawyer.

           Sawyer maneuvered himself around her limbs to kiss her. She really was perfect. He gave a soft moan as her fingers tangled in his hair, tugging just a little, and scratching at his scalp. He heard the door close behind Jack, and he grinned at Riona.

           “I love you, Princess.”

           “I love you, too,” she replied. “Now let’s see if you can finish what you started before he gets annoyed enough to come back.”

           He kissed her fiercely before doing as she asked and returning to his place between her thighs.

~*~

           It was a few hours later, and Sawyer was laying in bed with Riona against his chest. Kate and Artemis joined them, sitting in chairs next to the bed. Sawyer was combing his fingers through Riona’s hair, and she was asleep against his chest. He’d wrapped her up in his shirt and gotten her into one of her skirts, and Jack had said that they could stay tonight in the hatch as long as they just slept.

           He glanced over at Kate and Artemis, and he smiled at them.

           “Did Jack really walk in on you two, or was he just throwing a fit?” Kate asked.

           “Oh, no, he walked in on us,” Sawyer replied. “He’s lucky he walked in on us when he did, because it coulda been a lot more uncomfortable for him.”

           Artemis snorted, and Kate shook her head. He just shrugged.

           “Princess wanted to make good use of the bed. Who was I to say no?” He couldn’t help the smug smirk.

           “You two are terrible,” Kate replied.

           He shrugged again. Riona whined and nuzzled him, and he kissed the top of her head.

           “Sorry,” he muttered. “I love you.”

           “Love you,” she replied.

           He just pulled her close and smiled at Kate and Artemis as Riona fell asleep again. Things weren’t perfect, but maybe they would work out.

[dont-let-me-stop-you]

Singing superstar, American Idol breakout and The Voice coach Kelly Clarkson gets her own talk show. And, boy, does she have a lot to say!

Clarkson is still shocked that NBC crowned her the host of her very own daytime talk show. “When it was brought up to me, I was like, ‘What? No one’s going to watch!’” she says, with a self-deprecating laugh. It’s exactly that everyday charm that makes Clarkson so relatable—and so perfect as the host of The Kelly Clarkson Show (premiering Monday, September 9, at 2 p.m. ET on NBC). She calls the opportunity “a dream I never had but didn’t know I loved—and wanted!”

Clarkson, of course, is no stranger to television. The Grammy-winning songstress got her break in 2002 at the age of 20, after winning the inaugural season of American Idol. She went on to serve as a mentor on ABC’s singing competition Duets and as a bubbly coach on NBC’s The Voice, where she’ll return alongside Blake Shelton, Gwen Stefani and John Legend when season 17 begins September 23.

She grew up singing in church alongside her fellow parishioners in Burleson, Texas, not realizing she had a special talent until she was asked to join the junior high choir. “I was like, ‘Nerd alert!’ And then I became a nerd!” she jokes. It was then that Clarkson realized she had a versatile range and was a natural onstage. “I was oddly comfortable. Even from the first time; I never was nervous.”

Her mother, a first-grade English teacher, wasn’t exactly thrilled that her daughter turned down college to pursue a singing career. “When I said I wanted to be a singer, she was like, ‘Well, a lot of people do,’ and she was right.” But Clarkson appreciated the nudge to perfect her craft and go after her dream, which was initially to be a backup vocalist for noteworthy acts. “On Idol, I saw so many parents lie to their children, telling them they’re awesome and should pursue it when they were so off-key,” she admits. “My mom inspired me to work extra hard.”

She now thinks of early days on Idol as “the ultimate boot camp.” With the network still figuring out the show’s concept during season one, the contenders were frequently whisked from one location to another, asked to perform songs they didn’t know minutes before taking the stage, and worked through exhaustion. “I feel like I can handle anything now!” Clarkson, 37, says confidently, which will definitely come in handy for her own show, as she will be filming The Voice and The Kelly Clarkson Show simultaneously, rushing from one NBC set to another on a golf cart. “It’s going to get a little tricky, but I think we figured it out,” she says with her signature perk and optimism.

Dream Guests Clarkson has learned a few tricks from appearing on so many talk shows herself. As her own career progressed from Idol breakout to format-spanning superstar, she found herself a guest on just about all of them, talking about how she came from a little town in Texas, went on to win TV’s biggest talent show and amass dozens of awards (including three Grammys)—as well as notch more than 25 Billboard Top 100 singles, including the No. 1 pop hits “Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You),” “My Life Would Suck Without You” and “A Moment Like This.”

She’s a true talk-show fan who “grew up on Oprah,” she says. “My mom and I watched her every day after school.” She also appreciates the humor of Ellen DeGeneres—in fact, her new show will lead into The Ellen DeGeneres Show in the NBC afternoon lineup—and says she hopes to infuse elements of her talk-show idols into her own show format. She wants to provide a lighthearted escape from the day while tackling more serious topics.

Her dream guest is Oscar-winning actress Meryl Streep. “I’m a tad bit obsessed,” she says. She’d also love to wrangle some of her musical pals, like Dolly Parton and superstar country couple Trisha Yearwood and Garth Brooks. But Clarkson is just as excited to sit down and chat with everyday folks doing noteworthy endeavors. She’s quick to rave about a woman who runs an organization that throws birthday parties for homeless youth, whom she had on the pilot test run of her show. “I hope we bring her back!”

But music, naturally, will always be a recurring theme. “We’re opening up every show with music and highlighting artists we love,” she says, teasing that she might even join a few of her guests onstage. She also promises a mix of serious and heartwarming moments, hilarious skits and interesting guests across the board. And expect “anything and everything to happen,” whether she’s prepared for it or not.

“The thing I’ve learned from people like Jimmy [Fallon], Seth [Meyers] and Ellen is don’t plan too much because life takes hold of the show and things start happening,” she says. So Clarkson is ready to go with whatever pops up, a skill she demonstrated when hosting the 2019 Billboard Music Awards several months ago while battling appendicitis and requiring emergency surgery hours after exiting the MGM Grand Garden Arena.

The multifaceted star, who’s had hits on the pop, dance and country charts, admits she had somewhat of a déjà vu moment weeks later when she had an ovarian cyst burst seconds before going live on The Voice. “I grabbed Blake’s arm, Carson [Daly] said, ‘We’re live,’ and I thought, Oh Lord, here we go!” she recalls. Clarkson battled on and wound up back in the ER, joking that she felt horrible for making the paramedic attending to her so nervous that he had to poke her three times to find her vein for the IV.

The only thing that scares her, she says, is potentially not knowing the backstory of all of her guests ahead of time. “There’s no way I could possibly know everyone,” she says, candidly. But she’s surrounded herself with a team to keep her prepped, a lesson she learned from country superstar Reba McEntire, who she’s looked to as a mentor throughout her career (and who is her husband’s former stepmother). “She told me once, ‘You’re caring too much about too many things. You have to have people in the right spots,’” says Clarkson, who deemed the advice life-changing.

Clarkson is mostly unfiltered, which she likes to think is a positive trait. “Sometimes my husband doesn’t agree,” she jokes—and she does her best to make everyone feel comfortable on her set.

Family Affair Speaking of her husband, you won’t see Brandon Blackstock, 42, on the show—if he has anything to do with it. Clarkson admits her attempts to drag him out during the practice rounds were futile. “But I’ll probably force it somehow!” she says.

They’ve been married for almost six years. They met in 2006 when Clarkson performed on an Academy of Country Music Awards telecast and reconnected six years later at Super Bowl XLVI after Clarkson’s then-manager, Narvel Blackstock (McEntire’s ex-husband and Blackstock’s father), reintroduced them. “I found out he was single and I was like, ‘Yes, please!’” she says, recalling that he ticked all the boxes—including that he had career in the industry, meaning that he would understand her life in the limelight. The duo later learned they were, coincidentally, raised in the same small town, which further cemented their bond.

Today, Blackstock manages her, and Clarkson deems him her ultimate teammate. “We both love what we do, but we’re really good about checking out whenever we make it home from work,” she says. They spend time together every night after putting their kids to bed. “Sometimes we’ll go out or we’ll just listen to music,” she says, noting she’s “the bold one” and will often initiate a slow dance. “I’ll ask and he’s like, ‘OK!’ He’s probably just trying to get lucky!”

When she’s not at work, Clarkson prefers the quiet life and quality family time with their kids, River, 5, and Remington, 3, and Blackstock’s two children from his previous marriage, Savannah, 17, and Seth, 12, at their homes in Los Angeles and the Nashville area. “We go bowling, putt-putt, have movie nights, color together, ride little bikes in the backyard,” she says. In her physically demanding line of work, it’s also important to prioritize her health by planning quieter times, whether that’s harvesting honey from her backyard beehives or cooking with eggs from her hens. And she credits her typical happy-go-lucky persona to decades of hard work.

“I used to suffer from depression and I could easily slip back into that if I weren’t steadily paying attention to time management. With all the things that I do, I definitely need time for me,” she says. One of her favorite self-care practices includes keeping a gratitude journal. She is a sucker for a good self-help book and a big believer in surrounding herself with positive people. “Once I started weeding out [negative] people, it made a huge difference,” she says.

Another must is constantly trying new things. “I like being all over the map. I get really bored with monotony and I can’t stand to do the same thing,” she says. Clarkson enjoyed voicing the character Moxy in the animated movie UglyDolls early this year. “It was a fun challenge to hop into the [recording] booth,” she says.

Beyond her new TV series, she has her sights set on Broadway. She admits that between her current work and raising kids, it would be hard to pull off logistically. But she’s hoping to sneak in an upcoming NBC Live performance. “I want them to do White Christmas and I want to be Rosemary Clooney!” she says.

She acknowledges that she has enough on her plate for the time being, juggling multiple jobs, family and kids of all ages and stages. While her toddlers are in what she describes as a “cute stage,” which involves them adorably singing along to her vast array of tunes, her 17-year-old stepdaughter’s musical choices sometimes lead her into some interesting new parenting terrain.

“I’ll be in the car with her and I’m like, ‘What are we listening to? Do not let your father hear this,’” she says, with a laugh. “She’s a good kid, but if those hardcore lyrics ever lead to action, then stepmom is gonna take it away!” she playfully threatens.

Clarkson believes she’ll be able to handle whatever comes her way—on the new show or off. “I’m into a lot of stuff that maybe normal 37-year-olds don’t know about because of teenagers,” she says. “But then I am super into Disney because of our toddlers. I’m also a working woman and I own a business.” On The Kelly Clarkson Show, her goal will be to connect with her guests while letting her natural personality shine.

“I’m not going to try too hard to be anything. I feel like they gave me a show because they like me,” she says. “So I’m just going to lean into KC and hope it works out!”

[the--blackdahlia]

Armageddon Chapter 1 (Dean x Reader)

Title: Armageddon Chapter 1

Summary: Space. The Final Frontier. But for Dean Winchester, space was the last place he thought he would ever go. His family life isn’t perfect, his job isn’t ideal, but he has (Y/n), the woman he loves. Sam Winchester never thought his life would turn out the way it did. He is divorced, alone, and his brother most likely hates him. Working for NASA was not going to be easy. But, when a threat to the earth has him calling on his family for help, what can he do? can Sam and Dean push past his family issues to keep the Earth spinning another day? Based on the movie of the same name.Pairings: Dean x Reader; Sam x Jessica

Chapter Warnings: Brief language, implied sexual content, the beginning of impending doom.

AN: Check out my Patreon to get access to fics before they come to Tumblr! Also, I am doing a song for each chapter like I did with This Life. The song for this chapter is Can’t Stop Loving You by Van Halen. This was written by @flamencodiva and myself.

 Another late day at the office. Sam Winchester groaned as he pulled into the driveway of his house. It was quiet and empty. It had been almost five years since he and Jessica had split. She went back to a house her parents owned in San Antonio, and Sam stayed in Houston. So he always came back to an empty house.

Well, he had Sadie. His always faithful dog there to keep him company. But Jess was gone, and so was their adorable little boy. Sam got time with him, but not near as much as he had wanted. Work kept him busy though, so he didn’t have a lot of time for him to come around. Sam made his way into the house, Sadie there to greet him from her backyard kennel. Sam let her in, scratching her ears.

“At least I have you girl.” He smiled at his dog and hung his keys on the hook by the door. The house was pretty quiet, just the humming of the AC and the fridge running. Sam loosened his tie and pulled off his jacket, tossing them on the island in the middle of the kitchen. He knew that there wasn’t much in those light wood cabinets. There was some beer in the fridge, and some leftovers from dinner the previous night.

But he had a couple days off to relax and buy some groceries now. And maybe he could convince Jess to let him have a day trip with Ashton to the zoo or something. He missed that kid dearly. Shaking the thoughts out of his head, Sam tried to relax a bit. Grabbing a plate with leftovers, he placed it in the microwave. He cracked his neck some trying to relive the tension in his shoulders. Once the microwave beeped, he grabbed his beer and food and made his way to his TV. Settling in, he had leaned back to relax when the phone rang. With a groan, he reached for it and sighed.

“Winchester?” Sam rubbed his eyes.

“Sam,” the voice sounded urgent. “We need you to come back in, something’s happened out on the coast.”

“Are you kidding? I just got home.” Sam sighed.

“Look, I don’t care if you come in in your sweats and a Barbie t-shirt. I need you to get here and get here now.” The voice said. “Sam, listen, it’s bad. Real bad.” Sam closed his eyes and led Sadie back out to the kennel.

“I’m on my way.”

***********

Gulf of Mexico

John Winchester stood at the edge of the rig, watching the protestors on the boats, screaming about fracking and how they were harming the environment. John chuckled a little and looked over at Ash, who was setting up a golf tee.

“Can you believe this?” John asked, motioning at the boats.

“What?” Ash asked.

“How the hell do they think those boats run? Fairy dust and unicorn farts?” John laughed. “You should be thanking me!” John yelled over to them, knowing they probably couldn’t even hear him. Ash handed John his golf club and smirked as he lined up his shot.

“Fore!” John yelled, driving the ball towards the boat. Ash picked up his night briefing while John teased with the protestors. “God Ash, what could be better than this?”

“John, number 2 chewed through 180 feet last night,” Ash told him. John smirked and turned to look at Ash, who was trying to hide the smile on his face.

“And who do we have to thank for that?” John asked. Ash cleared his throat.

“Well, I’ll give you two guess, but you’re only going to need one,” Ash explained. John growled a little.

“Damn it, Dean!” John yelled out as he threw his club down. “I’m gonna kill him.” He marched away from his homemade driving range and headed towards the room he knew Dean was sleeping in. He smacked the door hard. “Dean! Get up!” John yelled.

Dean sat up, rubbing his eyes. He could hear his dad’s angry voice on the other side of the door and realized what was going on. John threw open the door as Dean jumped up wearing just his boxers and a tank top.

“Oh good, you’re in bed,” John said.

“Uh, hi dad…” Dean said. “You looking for me?”

“No, I’m looking for James Dean,” John said. “Of course I’m looking for you!” He walked towards Dean, who backed up.

“Look, I know you’re pissed and…” John held up a hand, silencing Dean.

“Dean, you’ve seen me pissed,” John grumbled. “What I’m feeling right now? Well, I would say that this is beyond pissed.” He gave an angry smirk as he glared at his eldest son. “Tell me, Dean, did I or did I not shut down number two last night?”

“Yeah, but I had a hunch and…” Dean started, but John raised his hand again to stop him from speaking.

“Okay Dean, let me tell you something,” John started. “Someday, many years from now when I’m in the ground, and you’re running this, you can make the decisions to run the drills at night. But as long as I’m breathing, you disobey my rules, you have to deal with the consequences. Got it?”

“Yeah, yeah of course,” Dean said. John raised an eyebrow. Normally Dean argued. Today, it was like he was trying to get him out of the room. “I screwed up, and I’m sorry. Now I will just think about the choices I made and work to make myself better.” Dean said, trying to usher John towards the door.

“What’s going on here?” John asked.

“What do you mean?” Dean asked, trying to play innocent. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He was now trying to keep John’s attention on him.

“Dean, you’ve been alive for thirty-five, and you’ve never once apologized to me this quickly.” John narrowed his eyes at John. John’s eyes scanned the room and found a black and white, lacy bra hanging off the bed. “Dean…”

“I uh, it might be Ketch’s…” Dean’s eyes widened a little and John turned around, stopping (Y/n) from going any farther.

(Y/n) froze in her spot, she was lucky to even be able to button Deans flannel enough to cover what she needed. She closed her eyes and cursed softly. Hanging her head in defeat, she cleared her throat.

“Hi John,” She muttered staying in her spot. John turned to look back at Dean.

“(Y/n), put some clothes on.” John looked at his son. “You, wait here. I’ll be right back.” Dean took off out the backdoor then. John went to his office.

“What’s going on?” Ketch asked, looking over from his controls.

“My son is dead,” John said, getting his shotgun. “I’m gonna stuff him and mount him and use him as a teaching aid on why you don’t screw around with my best friend’s daughter.”

(Y/n) having gotten dressed rushed out of the room and put herself between John and Dean.

“John, don’t!” She looked him in the eye.

“(Y/n), move,” John said, pointing his shotgun at Dean. (Y/n) looked over at Ketch for help, who just raised his hands. He wasn’t getting involved.

“John, you’re being ridiculous,” she stood firm not even letting Dean move her out of the way. “You both are behaving like children, and if that clock is right… we have investors coming on in five.” she nodded her head towards the clock and raised her eyebrow at John. John lowered his gun.

“Go get dressed,” John said. “(Y/n) use the room. Dean, up in the office. Now.” (Y/n) gave Dean a look before heading back towards the room to provide Dean with some clothes and to get dressed. Dean looked back at John.

“Dad, man to man, I love her,” Dean said.

“I still have time to shoot you,” John said. (Y/n) handed Dean some clothes then went to change.

“Do you really think that low of me?” Dean asked, taking the clothes and heading to the office. “Is it because I’m not in some cushy office job like Sam? Because look how that turned out for him.”

“Dean, I don’t want to do this right now. Just go get into your uniform.” John growled. Dean sighed and headed to the office, changing into the jumpsuit he wore while drilling.

(Y/n) shook her head at John, “You know he worked his ass off to finish school. He’s working on his masters, and you can’t even see that he is a good man, John. My dad wouldn’t treat him like this, and you know it.” (Y/n) shook her head as she adjusted her business attire and fixed her hair. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a tour to give.” With that, she left the room giving a soft smile to Dean as she passed him.

**********

NASA Headquarters

Houston Texas

Sam sat at the conference table with other people just as confused as he was. They were waiting on the full report, but so far, all they knew was that a large meteorite had fallen somewhere on the east coast and had caused lots of damage. He knew that the media would eat it up and would be showing up at their doorstep soon to demand answers. But that’s the problem. They didn’t have any answers.

“I know about as much as you guys do.” Director Robert Singer said as he settled at the head of the conference table. “Has anyone been able to figure out anything?”

“It took out one of the space stations.” One of the men said. “There was no time to get them out of the way.”

“Shit,” Bobby grumbled. “What else?”

“We’ve been mapping the trajectory,” Another scientist said. The woman pushed her glasses onto her face. “We have estimated the ETA to hit the earth at about 22 days.”

“Why the hell was something like this not brought to my attention sooner?” Bobby asked.

“It just changed courses suddenly,” Someone else said. “We’ve been trying to see if it would change again, but it’s kept a steady path this time.”

“Damn it!” Bobby hit the table. “Shit like this happens, you tell people. This could cost lives.” He motioned at the sky. “Shit. What are we supposed to do now?”

"Sir, we could right now try and measure the object and see if our satellites can figure out what it is” a voice from the end of the table spoke up. “We could also try to pinpoint where it will hit exactly, and a time frame on how to try and destroy it." Charlie Bradbury, one of the scientists who had just transferred from Florida, explained to them. "We would then need to come up with a plan, once we know more."

“Well?” Bobby said looking around the room. “What are you all waiting for? Get moving! Ya Idjits!” Everyone jumped up and started to get to work. Bobby looked over at Sam. “We really stepped in it this time, haven’t we?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Sam said. “I’ve been sitting here, doing the calculations and everything.”

“I trust your math Sam, I do. But right now we need one hell of a plan to figure out what the hell we’re dealing with.”

“Director Turner is on the phone now trying to get some answers.” Bobby sighed. “But I think he’s dealing with the president. And you know how well he likes to get answers and give out blame.” Sam chuckled a little. He had been on his fair share of those calls.

Sam and Bobby made their way toward Director Turner’s office. Rufus was sitting at his desk, on the phone with the President. He kept trying to open his mouth to talk. As Sam and Bobby approached Rufus’s desk, a scientist ran by and place a paper on his desk.

“Can we stop calling it an anomaly, what is this thing?” The President’s voice dripped with annoyance.

“This just in,” Rufus stated. “It’s an asteroid.”

“An asteroid?” The President asked. “How big is it?” Rufus read the paper.

“It’s diameter according to the Hubble telescope is approximately 96.7 Billion….” He shook his head and looked up at Bobby and Sam. “It’s the size of Texas Sir,” Rufus drawled. Sam placed his hand to his mouth to stifle his laugh. If this had been another time and place, Sam could imagine the color words that Rufus would’ve used to describe the asteroid.

“Why didn’t you detect this sooner?” The president was all but angry. Rufus had to grip the phone, or he was going to scream at him. Bobby could see the smoke coming out of Rufus’s ears as the anger bubbled up.    

“Well, our object collision budget’s a million dollars. That allows us to track about three percent of the sky.” Rufus drawled. “Begging your pardon sir, it’s a big ass sky.”

Forever Tags: @anathewierdo @dekahg @marvel-af @feelmyroarrrr  @nanie5 @imboredsueme @gemini0410 @aiaranradnay @babypink224221 @mogaruke @xxwarhawk @sandlee44 @shatteredabby @caswinchester2000 @supernaturalwincestsblog 

Dean Winchester/Jensen Ackles Tags: @queenslandlover-93 @screechingartisancashbailiff @strab0 @maaryisafangirl @deathofmissjackson @luciathewinchestergirl @sheris532 @bobasheebaby @bella-ca @akshi8278

Supernatural Tags:  @bandobsession98 @mrsdeanfuckingwinchester @fangirlsencyclopaediaofweirdness @ilovetardis @missihart23 @cloudyskylines @flamencodiva @sams-serialkiller-fetish @theas-bedtime-stories @huntingfreewill