#it's also what gave me my love for bugs!!! and that's such an integral part of me now that i can't imagine what would've happened

[peridots-pixiwolf]

ah. seems the special interest i've now had for 23 months, the only one that still consumes a portion of my mind at all times, just turned six today, and not a single one of the several lists I have to keep track of such anniversaries bothered to warn me of this early enough that I could actually draw something for it in time

[prince-liest]

I just wanna gush bc omg I love the 666 series so much. I think it made me realize I might be... furry-ish? adjacent? I just find it so satisfying how you go into detail about the unique body features of both of them, the way it feels to have deer ears or kiss a TV and just generally how much thought is put into the way their bodies work, and I've realized that my interest in that kind of idea is a pretty good reason to partake in more explicitly furry media lmao. Anyways

I'm also really in love with how you maintain the balance of each of their personality traits. Vox is simultaneously so pathetic and cringefail (also your dialogue for him is perfect, I can hear it crystal clear in my head) but also he has vastly more emotional intelligence than Alastor, no doubt at least in part because he has to deal with Val, and he's able to marginally calm down with his obsession to deal with sticky situations, but even then he still retains his personality and bumbles things sometimes because of the flaws in said personality! It's great. I also really appreciate the balance you've struck with Alastor, I feel like often Alastor is either written to either soften up so immediately that it feels disconnected from his character or is written overly mean and heartless for my liking and the way you've written him is such a delicious balance between softer aspects such as the prey instincts or moments of vulnerability and his untouchable and manipulative self, and also the way this side of him is neither written as wholly a front or wholly his real nature and the complex ways this makes him struggle with his increasing vulnerability. TL;DR arghgr your characterization is so good it makes me go a little feral

Also while I'm here, I'm curious whether you can give an answer to the degree to which Alastor is touch-averse. There's obviously a lot of ways in which he fundamentally dislikes touch but it also seems like there's at least some kinds of touch where he doesn't dislike the touch itself so much as he's afraid of the way it brings about feelings of caring and/or enjoyment being cared for. I'm curious how much, in general, you would say his touch aversion comes from either cause and possibly what kinds of touch do/don't provoke those flavors of aversion

Omg, what a lovely ask to receive. Honestly, everything you said that you enjoy about how I characterize these two is very much what I've been actively gunning for, so it's an absolute delight to see it outlined back to me. Success!!! Thank you so much!

And ahaha - I'm not a furry but I fucking love inhuman characters. Being raised in the pits of Homestuck fantroll RP made me enjoy the whole "they're bug/fish aliens" thing and it definitely rears its head again any time I encounter characters with inhuman qualities. I love writing Vox's TV/computer-ness and Alastor's deer and radio bits, and integrating them into who they now are as people.

As for Alastor's touch-aversion: It's funny that you ask about this, because the next chapter of 666 is going to dive into it a bit. Specifically into the fact that it's not, like, a set of boundaries that is consistently defined, and I write him that way on purpose. The very first time he and Vox sleep together, Alastor bottoms. He becomes significantly less amenable to touch after he goes through an uncomfortable rut cycle that gets sexual. By the time Vox convinces Alastor to fuck him, Alastor would never let Vox do that again and frankly only agrees to topping because Vox gave him an option that didn't involve getting his dick out. Then in the next episode, they're having clothes-off sexual contact. So, what gives?

Things that play into Alastor's willingness to touch and be touched as far as Vox is concerned:

How does he see Vox at that point in time? Disgustingly entitled (ew)? Hilariously beneath him (haha who cares)?

Does he care about what Vox thinks of him? Does Vox touching him draw his attention to positive or negative assumptions he has about Vox's perspective on doing so?

What value has he attached to this particular touch in the power balance of their relationship? Is he humoring Vox? Does he assume Vox thinks he's owed this? Does he perceive it as something Vox is genuinely doing for him?

Has he tried this particular kind of touch before? He's pretty willing to experiment, but that doesn't mean he'll do something twice without a compelling reason if he didn't like it the first time.

Is he getting off on this situation sexually? If so, is it fully willing (read: not a byproduct of uncomfortable hormones) on his part? That only really happens when he's in a submissive role and Vox is hitting a few very specific kinks, a major one of which is basically CNC tilted 30 degrees to the left.

Is he enjoying the touch in platonic ways? How does he feel about that? Is it a vulnerability to want something? Is it feeding his ego to be catered to? Is he worried that what he enjoys platonically is being read into in ways he doesn't like?

Is he fucking drunk? Things that bother you when sober often seem like a non-issue when you're not, both on a physical and emotional level.

How much touching has been happening recently? Has he hit his limit? Did he deliberately put himself into a situation earlier to have his limit be hit and surpassed, and now he's in the aftermath?

He does have a certain fundamental purely physical dislike of touch, but it's something that is really affected by how he perceives each individual situation as well as his relationship with Vox at that time, and his previous experiences!

[thelyingjoke]

hello mx bow today i cannot stop thinking about the motive video watchparty _(:」∠)_ it started w/ me thinking about how sad it is that gonta *agreed* to help kokichi show everyone the motive videos, and then kokichi lost his trust because he chose to lie abt everyone hating bugs *on top* of that...sir please stop self destructing all your personal relationships bc of your paranoia it hurts my feelings :[

but then i couldn't stop thinking about the plan WORKING nd how that would change the entire trajectory of the story...obv ryoma and kirumi would get A Lot of attention from the group but (unsurprisingly) i can't stop thinkin abt how it would affect kokichi...being outed as a pacifist w/ a small organization that just does silly hijinks would crush most of the villain plan. and he was *willing* to do that!! i don't remember where i was going with this. wah. kokichi being more integrated into the group is spinning in my head at all times forever.

SOSOSOSOOOOOO REAL

the plan working would lead to so many changes……..i love kokichi working in the main group scenarios it gets my brain going. especially with this scenario because it’s not just his word they’re relying on, they have more evidence that they can actually trust him!!! think how the group dynamics would change!!!!!! they’d still think he was annoying (he is) but they’d actually know he wouldn’t mean any harm. he can’t play himself up as a villain anymore and he’s fine with that because now he knows this current plan (the nicer plan) is working! not to mention ryoma & kirumi would be able to get the support they need. it’s not likely kirumi would try to kill again any time soon because at this point she’d be too obvious and hopefully everyone would convince her out of it

something interesting as well, i think, would be how everyone sees maki. how would people react to learning her talent from her video while also knowing kokichi is someone they can trust? would they distrust her more than canon? would some people sympathize with her, given that her orphanage was likely in her video, or would everyone focus on the assassin part? it also of course depends on how much of the situation the video gives away, if her being an assassin is even mentioned to be because of her worry for her orphanage in it at all. people were already a little wary of her in canon, after deciding to believe in her during the trial and her talent being revealed by a guy not many of them are fond of, and it makes me wonder what would have changed in these circumstances

it’s also funny to me to think about how MAD tsumugi would be at this. what the hell! this little shit foiled her heartwrenching murder of the chapter!! she came up with such good motives too!!! she can’t even try to villainize him later. what the fuck you were supposed to be the antagonist who fits with the season’s themes asshole we gave you a whole rivalry with kaito and everything stop breaking the script. she can’t just let everything stop before the chapter 2 murder! she’s definitely going to try her darndest to get people to kill. and given the new information about him, it may be hard to try and get someone to kill kokichi as much as it would be convenient for her. someone would probably eventually kill though, it’s important for the ratings, but also can you imagine how crushing that’d be

kokichi went and had the PERFECT plan that was working! he even showed himself to be trustworthy!! he gave up his villain plan for this!!! and then someone went and killed anyway. dude. Why Did They Do That. IT WOULD BE SO PAINFUL !! ohand imagine . he’s gained the trust of the group but then his trust towards them starts to be broken even more from this. he already had trust issues before but now it seems like they’re being confirmed. his nice peaceful plan only prevented one murder just for another to happen??? did he throw away the mastermind plan for nothing? he still believed there was a mastermind, and it seems even more definite now that someone in their group is working against them. he just doesn’t know who. in his mind it even further confirms his idea that cooperation will be punished. oughhh……… this scenario is so full of opportunities for both kokichi fluff & angst i am consuming it so hard even though it’s only mere crumbs i made up in my head

SPEAKING OF TRUST ISSUESSSSSSSS i am so with you on the gonta bit. stop it dude DON’T TELL A NEEDLESS LIE THAT WILL ONLY ALIENATE YOUR CLOSEST ALLY IN THE END. YOU ARE KILLING ME. although i also wonder if maybe it has something to do with the way he grows increasingly frustrated at gonta over the course of those 3 strategy meeting pre-fte dialogues! in the first one, if you invite kokichi, he’s hesitant about it before he receives the OK from gonta, while if you invite gonta, he’s very polite about letting gonta hang out with shuichi and saying they can meet later. in the second one, inviting kokichi has him expressing hesitance since he’s with gonta again—however, when you invite gonta, he gets more aggressive and goes “i get it, i’m not wanted!” after gonta mentions he’d been falling asleep. by the third one, kokichi doesn’t hesitate to hang out at all, and just says he’s got a plan, and inviting gonta has him go “i don’t mind, take him off my hands”. to me it seems like he was trying to explain everything, but gonta found it hard to follow—hard-to-follow things make gonta fall asleep, and kokichi took that the same as gonta calling him boring, which he hates. if you invite gonta the second time it merely comes out earlier, and kokichi probably notices it later if you decide to invite him instead, which irritates him. he gets tired of trying to explain it and decides lying to him would be easier, which is the plan he figures out by that third event. maybe a combination of all that and his paranoia made him do that? idk i’m just kinda spitballing ideas here . i’m very not normal about motive video watchparty !

[charrfie]

oh also because you did the oc one can we see the evolution of ur sona(s)?

I LOVEEEE SEEING PEOPLES OC/SONA EVOLUTIONS SO OF COURSE I'M DOWN TO ANSWER MORE ASKS LIKE THIS!!!

Putting it under a read more like I did with my last one! Because arrfs comes with a lot of long history I want to write down >:^D

A couple years ago I noticed that the disconnect I had with my old sona Charlie (who was my sona throughout middle-high school as well as being the oc I got my online alias from) was getting far too great. I couldn't really see myself being represented by them at all... they were more of a mascot than anything else. So I started the journey of figuring out a new sona design! This was the very first sketch I did of arrfs (some time in 2021 I believe?)

This design didn't stick very long because I really didn't like the shape language or colors. But I liked the concept a lot! A dog with a bunch of different colors on it! Thus came iteration two, where I rounded out shapes and colors a little more as well as added hair/accessories!

The final version of this part of the design stage has the most life I think. Lots of stripes and dots and a generally bubbly appearance. Plus the cool raccoon tails I had for a minute there. But ultimately... it wasn't enough. I couldn't see myself in what I had made and what I had poured so much time into.

It's worth mentioning that it was during this time I was struggling with my gender a lot. I had recently discovered that I was trans after rebelling against the idea that I wasn't "trans enough" for years and years. All my efforts put towards creating a sona that really felt like me were deeply rooted in this convoluted internal monologue I was having with myself concerning how I was perceived, femininity, and fitting into the bubble that was expected of me. That I expected of me. As much as I love and celebrate my transness today, change was scary to me then. Getting hit by such a gigantic realization was fully reflected in the art I made at the time. I latched onto the "me" that was constantly projected onto me in my work.

Acceptance changed a lot of things. And once again, that was not only reflected in my art, but in my depictions of myself in general. Kazoo, the name I temporarily gave to this iteration of arrfs, was the first time I truly saw myself in a sona. This time, the only reason I changed their design was because I felt like I could push it even further rather than because it didn't feel like me.

And then comes the final iteration. The arrfs you all know today! One of my dearest friends (+18 content warning, if you're a kid do not check their account) helped me figure out some aspects of their design. There's lots of meaning I could tie into their design choices, but a lot of it is something I'd rather keep close (that is, unless I ever decide to write a whole long post about it in the future).

One fun fact I WILL give you though: while its not depicted in this drawing due to stylistic choices, current arrfs has connected eyes to integrate the feeling of glasses rather than directly giving them glasses (as all past designs have had). Always thought that was a cute concept ^_^

SPACE'S MOST SWAGGED OUT BUG DOG!!!!!

[anime-grimmy-art]

Told you guys I’d ramble in due time.

I absolutely adore Bravely Default 2. It came at a really bad time cos I can’t waste 70 hours on a jrpg, but well, it’s too late to be concerned about that now. And as is tradition with me obsessing over a new game / show / whatever, you’ll basically find a fullblown review disguised as ramblings right under the cut. Be aware that I’m gonna talk about EVERYTHING, so spoilers are a given. Some maybe even for the previous Bravely Default games.

Also, if you wanna talk about this game in any capacity, hit me up, I’m DESPERATE to talk more about it.

Just for reference on how long this is gonna be, I made a voice recording while driving to remember all the points I wanna make, and that recording is almost 2 hours long. I did cut it down but still, this is gonna be a lot.

I’ll start off with the things that actually bugged me about the game, since there are only 3 things that really bothered me. First of, I really don’t like that you can name Seth. He has too much personality to be a self insert and player integration is not that big of a part in the game that this decision can be justified. It wouldn’t bother me that much if it didn’t leave a bad mark on the ending. First of all, we were robbed of Gloria desperately shouting for Seth, which makes the impact work less, and it’s just so prevalent that the name can’t be said because you have all the normal sound design going. If they’d just let the credits still play I wouldn’t have batted an eye, but because every other sound comes in it’s so obvious they’re just silently shouting in this scene, which makes it look silly. Like I said, this decision is more a detriment than an addition, and it’s a shame it casts a shadow on an otherwise heartfelt ending.

Speaking about lost potential, the other thing that really bothers me is the lost potential in certain plot points and character conclusions. I mainly mean Adam and Edna here. Both of them have been built up to be these formidable foes but they just, die. If it was just Adam I’d be fine with it, since you expect Edna to backstab him and be the actual big bad of the story, but I cannot fathom why they dropped Edna this HARD. If not Edna herself, I don’t understand why we don’t get more of a reaction from the Fairies and especially Adelle. I mean, Edna was her sole reason she left for her journey in the first place, then Edna dies and that’s it? No part where she grieves for a second? No concern from the others about Adelle? Mind you, I haven’t finished all the Sidequests, so maybe there actually is one in which this is addressed, but I think even just a Party Chat after Bad End 1 would have been sufficient to show how Adelle suddenly feels about the loss of Edna. It would have made Bad End 2 / The Secret Ending even more impactful, because, yeah, of course, you kinda know Adelle isn’t going to turn her back on fairy kind, but one of the reasons she doesn’t leave is because if Enda didn’t get a happy ending, then she shouldn’t either. It would have been amazing foreshadowing if she showed this sentiment before this scene happened. Other than that, it’s a shame that we know so little about Edna, or rather, how she became “bad”. I get she’s supposed to be corrupted by the Night’s Nexus, but how did it even come to this? It can’t have been a gradual thing, after all, Adelle says Edna was always good natured and then just disappeared one day. Really would have loved seeing more of that plot point.

Ok, last gripe I have, some choices in the soundtrack and sound design. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love the OST, and I will get to that, but damn, whatever Revo used for the lead instrument in Wiswald hurts my ears. It’s a really good track, but I always have to turn down my volume because these high pitched sounds physically hurt. And for sound design. Dude, the Night’s Nexus is the least threatening, nightmare fueled abomination that ever existed. I get that its growl is kinda supposed to be layered with Edna’s or sth, but it, it just sounds silly. If they went the route of just swinging between different voices or began distorting it from phase to phase, it would have been fine. But the choice they made really made an otherwise creepy design just absolutely silly.

Ok, enough jammering, on to the good stuff. Like I said, there’s going to be a lot, so I’ll try to be brief in each aspect.

Gameplay

I honestly like the new battle mechanics more than the old ones. This individual, turn based system feels way more dynamic and it’s easier to strategies in battles. Because nothing made me more angry than setting up for a heal and the enemy suddenly being faster than me and killing my healer. Now it’s easier to plan ahead a bit.

I also found myself experimenting more with the jobs. Not sure what it really is, but none of the party members leaning more towards certain types of jobs and the job leveling being way faster probably helped.

And I know some people get up in arms because the boss sometimes can be a real pain in the ass (looking at you pope dude), I still found it very interesting getting around counters or even using these counters as a benefit. As an example, I made Adelle my main physical fighter and gave her lots of counter abilities to help her profit from being countered by enemies themselves. Now, she can attack enemies, get countered, automatically evade that counter and earn a BP at the same time. Made a lot of boss fights way easier and fun to exploit.

Music

Ok, I will try my best to be really, really brief, because in my recording this part takes up almost 40 minutes. Anyways, Revo might have just become one of my absolute favorite composers ever. I don’t know what kind of magic he used, but I initially wasn’t that impressed with the OST, but every time I listened to it, I just fell in love harder and harder. Before getting into specifics, I wanna highlight the two things that made me love this OST overall. First of all, this soundtrack almost seems like a refinement of BD’s. While losing some of that fairytale vibe, it sounds even more fantasy now. And in contrast to the original, this almost sounds more balanced? Like, BD’s OST felt high energy throughout, BD2’s on the other hand manages to find a good balance between high and low energy pieces. Like, the character themes or battle themes are absolute hype, but the overworld themes are a lot calmer and easier to listen to while exploring. Second big point that makes this soundtrack amazing is that Revo is an absolute god at using emotional progression/storytelling and leitmotifs in his songs. And heck, do I love myself my leitmotifs. You’ve got some obvious ones, like the final battle theme in which all the character themes and other leitmotifs are integrated. Then you got some maybe more subtle once, just like how the overworld themes are just the main theme, just a lot calmer and using the lead instruments of the towns of the areas.

But my absolute favourites gotta be the character themes and the main theme. I love how fitting the themes for the characters are and in general, each of them is such a bop. At first I prefered Elvis’, because I sure am a sucker for jazzy vibes, but over time Adelle’s became my fav. It’s just something about the trumpets, and how the theme almost sounds a bit melancholic and bittersweet, that drew me in. And considering her story, mostly her bad end, that the bittersweet tone really fits.

Then there’s the main theme. Just like BD’s it shouts “triumphant anthem” and it definitely gives you a very familiar vibe, but I’d argue it has even better emotional progression. Heck, the first time I heard the music start up in the reveal trailer, I didn’t have to look at the screen to know this is gonna be a BD game. Also, the credit song version had me weeping at the true end. I’m someone who’s very easily affected by music (if me shouting about soundtracks on this blog wasn’t proof enough) and just hearing that ending song, getting the after credits scene, just for the second credits to start as a freaking duet. Dude, at that point I just started sobbing, I’m not gonna lie. Just this little part showed how much Revo knows how to put emotion in a song and also write it in such a way that he can elicit strong, emotional reactions from you too. 

Story

People have been complaining how the story is too boring and kinda disappointing in comparison to the last one, but I just think the games tried to accomplish different things here. Since the BD series is a celebration of old, classic jrpgs, “cliche” storytelling is a given. Though, BD did throw a lot of meta stuff in there too. BD2 in contrast just feels like a direct execution of that initial idea. It feels familiar, it feels comfy and it feels safe. Except for the little things with the endings and then overwriting the Nexus’ “save file”, BD2 doesn’t really get that meta, which is totally fine. It doesn’t try to reinvent or innovate anything, it just wants to be a fantasy story, that might be cliche, but still fun and enjoyable in its own right.

I’d also argue that the pacing is a lot better than the old game, because with BD I sometimes found myself skipping through scenes to get on with the story. Not that this game didn’t have me rushing through stuff as well, but I found it kept my intrigue way better than the original.

Characters

Next to the music, this is the part that I absolutely love the most. While, yes, they did lose a lot of potential with some characters, mostly with the villains, the main cast is just so much fun. I love these 4 dorks so, so much.

I honestly can’t stand how much people compare them to the original cast. Yes, ofc, I’ve been doing my fair share of comparisons too, but calling these four a more boring version of BD’s party physically hurts me. Because except for some initial impressions, the Heroes of Light are completely different from our beloved Warriors of Light.

While yes, Seth and Gloria give off strong Tiz and Agnes vibes at first, they both grow into such different characters that they’re not really comparable. I think this shows with Adelle and Elvis even more. I do understand how people could compare Adelle and Edea, since they’re both the feisty girl type, but I can’t understand how people can see Ringabel and Elvis as the same character type. While those two are the “suave” party members, they act so differently from another. And that’s honestly apparent the first time you meet them. 

Anyways, I love these 4 so much.

We technically don’t know a lot about Seth at all, but they manage to pull so much out of just the fact that he’s a sailor, that it makes him really endearing, really fast.

I was kinda disinterested with Gloria at first, because again, the initial impression was Agnés2.0, but she grew on me a lot. Gloria is way more hard headed and honestly sassy in comparison to Agnés and I absolutely adore it.

Elvis. Elvis, my man. I love this fantasy scottosh wizard so, so much. He’s such a ridiculous character but so endearing at the same time. You got all this dorkiness, with him setting himself on fire as a student, him doing god knows what for a good drink or just laughing danger and prejudice in the face. But then you got his super empathetic and caring side. Mind you, most of his wise moments come from quoting Lady Emma, but still, as much as he’s hopeless with certain social situations, he’s actually still really good at reading the room and playing things smart. He’s a smart and powerful idiot, which makes him a danger to everyone and himself, and I love him for it. (I also can’t believe they called him Lesley I MEAN COME ON)

And then there’s Adelle. I liked her from the start, but I didn’t think she would stick out to me. I think now she’s my favourite character. Not even talking about all the stuff that happens in chapter 3 and onward, because these story threads are awesome in their own right, but there’s just something about her personality that’s interesting and appealing to me. Like I said, I’m not surprised people compare her to Edea, I did too at first, but while Edea walks very close to the line of a Tsundere, I was really surprised that Adelle is, well, not a Tsundere at all. Yeah, of course she’s putting Elvis down a lot, but that stems more from her preventing his ego from going to his head than her being all embarrassed. No, Adelle is actually really well adjusted when it comes to communication. While it’s hilarious that she and Elvis met with her chucking her shoes at him, the two just got along well right from the start. Adelle in general has this really open and helpful personality, but also doesn’t shy away from putting her foot down, even if that sometimes comes out as an embarrassed sputter. She’s also the mother hen of the group. She looks out for the other three and gets concerned about them real fast. 

I dunno, Adelle just really grew on me over the course of this game, and then her kinda being paired with Elvis too, as partners and as partners, makes me like her even more. Because as much as I like their personalities individually, I like their character dynamic even more. I honestly love the relationships between all four of them a lot. You really feel them grow closer as friends and all the little character sidequests just always made me really happy.

Conclusion

You might not believe me, but I really held back there. This could probably have been 3 times its length. As much as I love this game, it’s of course not perfect. It struggles and flails in some parts a lot and it certainly has some aspects that might turn people off. But for me, it was just a very familiar and comfy game that didn’t necessarily deliver anything new, but that told its story in such a way that it still got me excited to keep going. The soundtrack is absolutely amazing and the conclusion of the story actually got me to cry. While not groundbreaking, this game is highly enjoyable and leaves you absolutely satisfied at the end.

Also, I would like to iterate that I am desperate to get more content about this game, so if you wanna chat about it, hit me up.

Anyways, anyone else felt like having a fever dream when everybody in chapter 2 started talking fantasy scottish? Cos I sure did.

[p-artsypants]

P-Artsypants Fic Masterpost!

This information is always available on my blog. 

Find most, if not more, of these fics on:

Fanfiction.net | Archive of Our Own | Wattpad

(~AU’s, *Finished, ❤️Author’s Favorites)

Kingdom Hearts

~❤️Rage Awakened AO3 | FF.net- Ten years ago, Terra, Aqua, and Ventus lost their fellow apprentice, Sora, in Deep Jungle. Now, they are to return with two new students, Riku and Kairi, to lock the heart of the world. All the while, something watches from the trees. Feral!Sora AU

My Kingdom for a Heart AO3 | FF.Net - The curse of being one of the Princesses of heart, is that there’s always someone out to get you. As Xemnas looked failure in the face, he reached out in a last ditch effort and destroyed Kairi’s heart. Now her friends must travel the worlds again. Sora, to find a way to recover Kairi’s heart, and Riku, to make amends to those he has wronged. All the while, the darkness grows. [Unfinished, on permanent hiatus]

Miraculous Ladybug

One Shots

*❤️Amalgam- When an young man is rejected for being ‘incompatible’ he turns into the akuma ‘Amalgam’ able to fuse two people together. And later Adrien and Marinette would debate if it was lucky or unlucky that they got hit. (Also Available in Russian)

*Sing We All Noel- After receiving the worst Christmas present ever from his father, Chat Noir finds himself out on the streets with nowhere to go on Christmas Eve. Thankfully, Ladybug finds him and brings him home.

*Speechless- In a world where everyone has a soulmark, the first words their soulmate will say to them, Marinette is born without one. But Adrien Agreste has two. Curious, considering he’s mute.

*❤️Tunnels of Love- The night started out with an accidental kiss from Adrien Agreste, and ended with her bleeding in the Catacombs of Paris. Ladybug, the wielder of the miraculous of good luck. Yeah right. (Some blood)

*The Reveal That Wasn’t- First Parts My ending to kittybug’s Tumblr Prompt

*What A Mess We’re In- Ladybug has a lot on her mind, and when Chat Noir bugs her enough, she tells him she’s going to confess to her Crush, Adrien Agreste. Chat’s reaction is not what she’s expecting.

*Oblivi-oh no! - A retelling of Oblivio, except Ladybug is the only one to lose her memory. How will Chat deal?

*Bad Day (3 chapters) - Marinette was Ladybug! This was Adrien’s luckiest day ever! Except it wasn’t, because all his good luck was used up in one go. Turns out this might be the worst day of his life.

*One Win, So Many Losses- Marinette was forced to break up with Adrien. It had been a low blow from Gabriel, to be sure. But she was Ladybug. She’d find a solution…right? An alternate ending to Chat Blanc, where Adrien doesn’t Cataclysm the akuma.

*❤️Five Minutes- Gabriel has had enough of all these girls fighting over Adrien. He decides it’s high time Adrien picks one, and arranges the perfect opportunity for him to do so. Each candidate has five minutes to present why they’d be a good girlfriend. Marinette decides to take this opportunity to shoot her shot.

~*Panache- Every eligible maiden was invited to the Prince’s ball. That included Marinette, scullery maid in her own household. But her stepsisters destroyed her dress, and she can’t go to the ball in rags. Or can she? (Cinderella!AU)

*Perfect, No Matter What-In which Gabriel sets the bar even lower for himself, a reveal happens because of pain medication, and the new guardian actually goes to Chloé for advice.

*Crushed- Stuck under a collapsed building together, Chat Noir and Marinette have a heart to heart.

*Lovelace- Convinced that he's unlovable, Adrien is quickly thrown for a loop when Marinette confesses her love for him out of the blue. An akumatization and reveal later, he changes his mind about being unlovable.

Long Fics

*❤️Longest Night- (FF.net | Ao3) - The day started out sucky to begin with. Her crush ousted to the class and Adrien. Lila taking pride in exacting her revenge. But by the time patrol was over, a young man was dead, and Ladybug’s identity was at risk. Lila was the least of her concerns. Good thing Adrien was taking it all like a champ. (Rated M for scenes of torture)

*❤️Nine Lives- (FF.net) When Adrien Agreste is scheduled to go to a Military School in Germany, Chat Noir must make a critical decision. Does he give up his Miraculous? Or does he give up his life as Adrien? I’ll save you the trouble of guessing, he gives up being Adrien.

*Tender Words- When Marinette finally gets the guts to confess her feelings for Adrien, some things go so wrong, and other things go so right.

*Integrity- Overwhelmed with her responsibilities, guilt, and drama, Marinette has an emotional breakdown in front of everyone, and even hands over her earrings in a moment of weakness. Only for a few seconds, but the damage was done. Adrien’s pretty quick on the uptake like that.

~Much Obliged- Everyone deals with grief differently. Some take to drinking, others devote themselves to charity. Adrien Agreste? Well, he became a cowboy. Marinette Dupain-Cheng is a witch, one of very few in the world. She knows what it’s like to be doubted, and assumed delusional. Maybe that’s why they got along so well. Or maybe it’s just because they both like big hats. AU where everything is the same, except instead of superheroes, Adrien is a Cowboy and Marinette is a witch. (Unfinished) (Based on a AU by @bugaboo-n-bananoir)

*I’ll Handle This- “I’ll solve all your problems,” Plagg had said. “You just have to agree to it.” A fixed relationship with his father, Lila to stop bothering him, and Ladybug to fall in love with him? Who wouldn’t agree to that? Except Plagg was the God of Destruction and Chaos and had a more…hands-on approach. Adrien just wants his body back. (Body swap fic)

The Ghost of Smokey Joe- Adrien Agreste was acting bizarre. Stilted body language, plastic smile, and he seemed to have forgotten how close they were. Before she can get the truth out of him, Marinette finds herself as the sole heir to the Gabriel brand and the mansion, following the murder-suicide of both Adrien and Gabriel Agreste. The mystery continues as Tikki explains that Adrien was Chat Noir...but if Adrien is six feet under, why is Chat Noir still running around?

How To Train Your Dragon

One Shots

The Vikings Have Their Tea (FF.Net | AO3)

Arranged Marriage- Takes place at the beginning of HTTYD

❤️Breathe- Survival of the fittest

~Childhood Friends- At the Sandbox

❤️Easy Fix- In which Hiccup has a bad day

~Fashion Designer- Astrid needs a fill in

❤️Frozen- In Which Astrid takes a Dip and things get frisky (Rated M)

❤️Headache- In Which Hiccup hits his head….really hard

❤️Heir- In Which Hiccup is Picked (Longer version by FateCharms)

Illness- In Which Stoick is a dad

~Illusionist- Trick gone wrong

~In the Walls- In which there’s a poop ghost

~Knocking On The Wrong Door (2) - A chance encounter

❤️Messages- Astrid is Frustrated with Hiccup’s obliviousness

~To Mirkwood- Hiccup is not a dwarf

~Monster Falls- Hiccup and Astrid take a dip

❤️Mute- In which there’s a quiet stranger

~Music Video (ImgHS)- He didn’t expect it

❤️Operation: Lovebirds- In Which the gang makes a plan, and Hiccup gets Drunk

~Over- Too many nightmares

~Partners in Crime- A normal day at work

~Pirate- Astrid is the greatest treasure

~Prince- He doesn’t want to be a broken King

❤️Sorting Things Out- In Which Astrid gets her ducks in a row

~The Dragon and The Dame- Beauty and the Beast Au

The Pit- In Which Hiccup is rescued

Hide and Seek- Part 1

Lost and Found- Part 2

Long fics:

*❤️Infernal Responsibility- Being the son of the chief takes brains, courage, and a lot of patience. But at his father’s the request for marriage, Hiccup decides he has had enough. When he seeks out a life of ease, he runs into more than what he bargained for.

*❤️Roses and Lilies- “Astrid, you and I both know you’re much tougher than I am. You’re more brave, and a better fighter…but just for a little while…could we pretend that I’m the one protecting you?” “Oh gods yes!” (Also Available in Spanish!)

*~What the Water Gave Me- The sea is a wild and dangerous thing, something that cannot be foretold or predicted. Hiccup discovered this many years ago, in human naiveté. Yet, what was meant as a sacrifice became a new life, one like no one could comprehend. He now finds himself once more in the unknowing hands of those that sentenced him to death. He only prays things will be different this time. Merman!AU

*Parasite- Soulsnatcher Dragons are rare but deadly. But, As Hiccup finds out, it’s the eggs you have to watch out for.

*~320 State Street- Gobber’s Goods. A Hardware Store that was rumored to have everything you needed. She thought she only needed a job. Turns out, she needed a lot more than that. (A Modern AU no one asked for)

*~❤️The North Tower- When Finn Hofferson died, Astrid inherited his castle in Wales…and a whole lot more. Something sinister lurks in the North Tower.

*~❤️Boy Toy- AO3 - At the age of 21, Princess Astrid lawfully has to pick a husband. But when the perfect groom is nowhere to be found, she requests the toymaker to create one for her. It’s safe to say that everyone in the kingdom is a little concerned. (Pinocchio!AU I guess?)

No, You Go First- AO3 - The Chief of Berk was a headstrong viking, stubborn and full of pride, and willing to do whatever it takes to keep his village safe. But for a moment, he puts that aside, and listens to his son. In which Hiccup convinces his dad not to make him go through Dragon Training, and the subsequent changes that follow.

*In Due Time- AO3 - As another illness sweeps through Berk, Gothi needs another ingredient for her medicine…one that doesn’t exist anymore. Fortunately, she kept that old spell book around for such an occasion. Big Hiccup is sent to five years into the past, and his younger self sent to take his place in the future. But it’s only a few days, what could go wrong?

Trollhunters: Tales from Arcadia

❤️Arcadia or Bust- In Which Arcadia welcomes back it’s underground citizens.

Teen Titans

Oneshots:

~Big Brother- Don’t turn out the light (Horror)

Dear Jason- Bruce Writes a letter

Just Drawing- Bruce thinks about Robin

The Prisoner- Starfire is Guilty

Of Mustard and Three Foot Purple Tongues- A collection of Oneshots and Drabbles

Long Fics (*Finished):

*~❤️Carol of the Bells- High in the dark Bell Tower of Notre Dame, there lives a mysterious bell ringer. Legend tells of the angel who fell from the sky, and the curse she bares. There are few who know her true identity though; her master, the priest, and the acrobat that performs on the streets below. Based loosely on ‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’ RobxStar and slight BBxRae

*No Escape- Three years ago, Starfire escaped an Alien race called the Gordanians, to arrive on Earth. They’re back, and ready to put Starfire back where she belongs, behind reinforced Titanium bars. Robin’s not about to let her go…if only he hadn’t got captured first. How does it feel to be the alien, Robin?

*Now you Know My Pain- When the new Villain, Gender Bender, comes to down, the Titans find themselves in an odd situation. They’ve been turned into the opposite gender against their will! Now in order to change back, they must learn to understand the gender they’ve turned into. Rated T for obvious reasons. A great read if you’ve ever wondered why girls or guys do [blank].

*Paint it Black- Robin disappeared three months ago. Now, Jump City’s crime rate is mysteriously being taken care of by a normal, albeit strange, teenage boy who goes by the name Black. As the Titans befriend this lunatic, they begin to see a relation between him and their missing leader. Will they be able to find Robin, or will Black turn them all insane as himself? Actually, contains NO OC.

*Saving Grace- “When I’m done with you, you won’t be able to walk upright or speak coherent sentences and all you’ll see is my mask and my voice repeating in your head…Weak. Richard Grayson, I am not tough, I am everything that you fear.” Happy Ending! Smudge of RobStar. NO Slash!

Other Fandoms

Final Fantasy XV

❤️Requiem for Pitioss-“O King. The god’s have heard your cries. Know that we weep with you. The Oracle’s calling has not yet been fulfilled. But…Lunafreya as you know her cannot return the way she was.” Noctis looked up, hopeful. “But she can return!” Canon divergence from Chapter 9. Happy ending. Some spoilers.

Final Fantasy X

I Do…I Guess? - “I would…like to ask you something.” “Shoot.” “Well…if it’s not too much…I’d like to ask you…to marry me.” Knowing what’s to come during her pilgrimage, Yuna asks Tidus to marry her, strictly for convenience and having an official next of kin, of course. Starts after Luca and how this decision would affect the rest of the story.

Beauty and the Beast

*❤️Behold the Beast- A Oneshot alternate ending to the Animated Film

Cinderella

*❤️Midnight- “When the clock strikes twelve, the spell will be broken,” the fairy godmother had warned. A retelling of the story, when Cinderella doesn’t escape the ball in time. Oneshot

*So This is Love- What if Jaq and Gus hadn’t made it in time to help Cinderella? A new twist on the ending of the classic Fairytale, and what lies beyond the story. She still gets her happy ending and her Prince, and her step family gets their just deserts.

Sleeping Beauty

*❤️A Love Song Back To Me- Maleficent saw the loophole that stared her in the face. Prince Phillip would break the curse in time, for sure. After all, he was betrothed to Aurora. So in an effort for her evil plan to stay in action, Maleficent takes care of the young prince herself. Phillip never imagined having to live off the land like the birds above. Alternate twist on the classic Disney tale.

Escaflowne

Down Feathers- Hitomi’s depressed. She’s been away from Van too long, he comes back to visit her…but what if something went wrong with the transfer? (Not finished. Never will be finished. Mwahaha) Circa 2012

*Angel’s Wounds- Fanelia’s been victorious in their most recent battle with Basrum. Unfortunately, someone is wounded and just seeks solace in his love that lives so far away. Post Anime.

Momma Look Sharp- With the war between Fanelia and Basrum finally coming to a close, the kingdom is celebrating. The young king, however, is suffering from an experience unlike any he had before. Van finally seeks solace in his wife.

[elysian-entries]

One film, two visions; The Justice League

It’s 2017; the highly anticipated “Justice League” film, directed by Zack Snyder, is set to be released later in the year as a continuation of the DCEU.

A blockbuster movie showcasing the biggest DC characters uniting. Taking down the ultimate super villain; bound to fulfil millions of past and present children’s, as well as current adults and elderly dreams.

Then a fork in the road appears, Snyder and his wife, Deborah, step down from the colossal project due to the incredibly woeful loss of their daughter, Autumn. News hits the fans like a brick. Resulting in Joss Whedon and the Warner Bros. Studio stepping up to the mantle. Or at least attempting to.

Whedon's theatrical cut lost Warner Bros. Pictures approximately $60 million dollars. With overall painfully negative reviews and reception. Breaking the hearts of DC fans everywhere.

4 years, campaigns, hashtags, sky banners, petitions, and billboards later; I can’t say how many of us would have predicted receiving the holy gift that is the “Snyder Cut”, in its full 4 hour running time glory (in a 4:3 ratio, which somehow adds to the grandeur). 4 years of dedicated, passionate and determined people helping in any way they can for the cause. It was a journey to behold.

A large section in Snyder’s 4 hour venture is used to build dimension and depth in the characters. Making an absolute world of a difference. Something that was sorely lacking in Whedon's cut. The film had a completely different feel and atmosphere instantly.

There's no better example of increased depth in characters than Cyborg's (Ray Fisher's) narrative. I was engaged, and intrigued by his story. In Whedon’s cut, he isn't even given a second thought. His entire backstory was cut as well as his father's important role also being stripped. His scene where he sacrificed himself in order for them to find the mother box was gone. And it took away such an important, integral part in Cyborgs story, and in the film in general I believe and also realised having seen the two movies; the complicated but delicately developing relationship between father and son. And just the whole story in general made such a difference in Snyder's cut, it really is almost indescribable the difference it made. It just felt so much more genuine and heartfelt. Like a real developed and executed narrative.

In Snyder's cut we were shown detailed flashbacks that fully fleshed out his character, his morals and his relationships. Creating a much needed deeper connection with the audience. We experience his conflicting journey to accepting his responsibility, accepting the past, the "gift he has", and his purpose in the league. Leading into receiving closure. He was given great and meaningful importance and purpose in this cut.

Similarly, Ezra Miller's Flash was too given a largely more meaningful and impactful role that left quite the impression on me. His character was light-hearted and charming but still had those important, emotionally impactful scenes. Which were painfully lacking in Whedon's cut. I was left loving Barry Allen a lot more than I already did. Barry's scenes with his wrongly convicted father were hard hitting for me. They also play a large part in making later scenes more impactful. Like his detrimental importance during the final fight. In Whedon's cut his big hero moment was saving a Russian family. The overall the inclusion of the family was superfluous and extraneous, along with the robber at the start and many other things. Not only that but Whedon's cut gave the Flash a silly, attempted comical relief role. To be fair he attempted to give everybody a comical relief role. Which hardly worked because none of the attempts were actually funny and were at time agonizing. It ultimately lacked substance and came across as almost immature. The scene where Barry went on about brunch was painful. Leading me to ask, why? Why was this so important to film Whedon?

After re-watching Whedon’s version, I had gained a new found appreciation for Snyder's representation of Barry. '"Make your own future, make your own past"; he echoes his father’s words. "Your son really was one of them, the best of the best," as his theme "At the Speed of Force" plays in the background of this pivotal moment. A powerful scene reflecting Barry's ulterior motive, doing his father proud. Which invoked many tears. And still does whenever I re-watch the scene or listen to the song. As if it were the first time experiencing it. Thomas Holkenborg's soundtrack truly amplified emotion and made the scenes much more powerful, It makes for one of the absolute best scenes in the movie; I'd say one of, if not my absolute favourite.

His job in charging up Victor was completely removed and I have to wonder why. Instead Barry was left to participate in "bug duty" (bugs being one of his fears also). Barry's role in Snyder's cut, and that one incredible scene where he broke the rule was arguably better than Whedon's Justice League as a whole.

I think the only scene in Whedon's cut involving Barry that I thought was actually meaningful was where he was faced with his first real mission. And he was confronted with his fears of "obnoxiously tall" beings. He appeared anxious and frantic. Fearful. Communicating to us his inexperience. And Batman simply told him to just "save one". To which he then, without struggle, saved them all. And was also able to participate in the final battle. The "save one" scene made those achievements more meaningful.

The scene after they won the battle, showcases the victorious team standing proud; and Barry with a sweet, goofy, golden retriever-esque smile plastered on his face. What a loveable smile.

An interesting contrast is the scene in where Barry reveals to his father his new position at an “actual job”. In Snyder’s cut the father was absolutely over the moon, shouting at the top of his lungs, "his foot is in the door!" repeatedly in excitement. It tugged at my heart strings; his shameless pride in his son. Making me wonder how he would have shown his pride if he found out Barry saved the whole Earth and humanity. We can assume Barry had that unequivocally powerful underlying thought too. Contributing to his saccharine reaction. In Whedon’s cut the reaction was softer and more timid but nonetheless a sweet moment. Barry becoming bashful.

It was a sweet touch to have Cyborg and Flash finally fist bump during that victorious scene after Victor rejected Barry's initial advance in Whedon's cut. Ezra Miller improvising that “racially charged” line, acknowledging the possible racism attached to a fist bump I assume. The whole fist bumping being "racially charged" was not included in Snyder's cut. The grave digging scene was entirely different. Which I far more preferred. It was a group excursion. With a little positive interaction between the Atlantean and the Amazonian. And funnier, more light-hearted dialogue between Barry and Victor.

Aquaman’s contrast was interesting. In Whedon’s cut he actually sought out to obtain the trident to help the league (although he was always disagreeing with them). Compared to Snyder; where he was apprehensive and had to be hesitantly persuaded by Willem Dafoe’s character Vulko (who was completely absent from Whedon’s cut). This was also an importantly established relationship by Snyder. Arthur first makes his desire to help the the team known saving them from the water rushing from Gotham Harbour. He isn't acknowledged in the theatrical cut but in Snyder's cut Diana notices and takes a moment to take in his presence (I assume?). Then Barry asks who that guy is. And of course we all know, it's Aquaman.

I particularly liked how Snyder chose to include Barry asking for Arthur's opinion on military hats. It's an odd, minimalistic thing to include - the reasoning as to why I like it. I also thought it was quite charming.

A scene I think deserves a mention is when Aquaman is first introduced, and then rejects Bruce's offer, he then makes his way back into the ocean. A farewell song is performed. This was quite early in the film and I think the voices being hauntingly beautiful, yet slightly eerie/poignant set the perfect atmosphere. A well done scene.

His overall character was also contrasting. He became a genuine hero who was proved capable of more than water powers and silly moments. Including that god-awful lasso of truth scene. In the theatrical cut he was bitter, a bit of a joke, not caring too much about the events that were unfolding. He had more of a heroes’ sense of purpose within Snyder’s cut.

Gal Gadot did not gain too much from the extra scenes. Though different to the theatrical cut, Snyder had paired her with a repetitive character establishing theme. It could be referred to as ancient lamentation music. Hauntingly beautiful. Something I could only assume would be the battle cries of the Amazonian warriors and the Amazonian warrior inside Diana. In some ways possibly over used, though I thought it was brilliant. It has a special place in my heart because I love that type of soundtrack. The almost eerie, maybe poignant but overall emotion provoking type. Especially her introduction scene where she faces off against the terrorists )which was overall better in Snyder's cut) The haunting warrior moans fade into her classic theme to create an incredible atmosphere. And that atmosphere was definitely missing in Whedon's cut, in more than just that one scene. It was also sorely lacking the lamentation music. We also didn't get that sweet interaction between Diana and the little girl.

When Diana began detailing Steppenwolf and the mother boxes past to Bruce, the cuts were very strange and abrupt/awkward in some way. And it felt silly and rushed; and I think that perfectly describes the whole film.

Whedon's cut also included uncomfortable scenes. Almost forcing characters to be funny where it was just completely out of place and character. Or just downright inappropriate. To be fair, Whedon is known for the Marvel movies in which fourth wall dimension breaking and odd self ware/ironic jokes are heavily used. One of the main reasons I don't particularly enjoy them, but rather enjoy the darker, more meaningful DC movies. I say meaningful in the way in which we are completely transported into this universe; where it's taken seriously and has obvious effects and meaning to the characters. Compared to Whedon's Marvel films in which the threat is joked about and the characters make fun at their expense.

Another negative contrast is the colour grading and overall shots. A good example is the conversation between Lois Lane and Martha Kent. In Whedon's version the colour is poppy, reminiscent of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or The Office. As if it were an empty shell of a TV show. Lacking any artistic or symbolic aspects. Whereas Snyder's conversation between Martha Kent (who was actually Martian Manhunter) and Lois Lane was beautiful. The lighting was dim, with steam from their hot coffee creating a brilliant shot and conveying the perfect mood. Almost a piece of art. A lot of Snyder's cut looked as if it were ripped straight out of an incredible graphic novel. His talent when it comes to filmmaking is grandiloquent. Compared to Whedon's over saturated and flat scenes as if it were from a cliché sitcom.

Whedon also made the Justice League a lot more dysfunctional than it needed to be.

The scene where the team unanimously come up with the plan to revive Superman seemed really silly and lackluster in Whedon's cut. In Snyder's cut it was a genuine moment. A "wow" moment where the penny dropped. It gave me goose-bumps. The way it was implied, the explanation/analogy with the house, and then Cyborg creating a Superman visual as the team, standing around the table, stared at it in awe. All thinking the same thing. Without even having to say it (as Barry pointed out) It was a uniting moment. Whedon's version was just, disappointing. Lacking any impact at all. And it made the team seem disconnected in a way. Whereas in Snyder's scene the league's thoughts were in unison.

There was also an agonizing amount of Wonder Woman praise. I think praise is a...well...nicer way of putting it. It was more so adolescent boy humour, immature if you will; with her being the butt of the joke. To the point where it was little uncomfortable and borderline unnecessary. And to another point where Gal Gadot refused to do a scene, (the one where Flash lands on her) and Whedon insisted so much on still including it - that they used a body double. A scene so stupid and pointless it actually hurts. Why, Whedon?

Superman's main feature in this film is his moustache. Or, lack thereof. At the beginning of the theatrical cut, we witness the infamous Superman film scene, where we are introduced to his CGI moustache…then “Everybody Knows” by Sigrid plays as we see the aftermath of his death. I really enjoyed this scene, the song and the atmosphere. I think it was a strong start, setting the poignant mood. But of course it all goes out the window and downhill from here.

The biggest difference between the two Superman’s was the elimination of the godforsaken CGI removed moustache and the introduction to the “Recovery Suit” in Snyder's cut, which was a brilliant touch. We actually see Clark stumble upon the suit. A scene where various voices from his past, echo in his mind. An equally important and impactful scene; where he flied up into the universe, overlooking the Earth he is to protect.

I also really liked the whole, "Lois Lane is key" setup, with the eerie premonitions and glimpses into the “Knightmare”. Adding yet another deeper layer to the narrative. Setting the scene for Snyder's envisioned sequel.

In Whedon's cut during the first confrontation where Clark is confused immediately after his resurrection - the previous BvS battle is implemented more. With the "Do you bleed?" question being revisited. Giving us an unwanted closer look at the strange looking $3 million dollar CGI.

I liked Snyder's first confrontation better. It included more action and participation of all parties. And it was just a longer scene, making it seem more plausible and less silly. Before Clark reached Bruce he went through every member. Resulting in a little appreciated interaction between Arthur and Barry. I also thought Whedon’s scene showing Superman throwing Batman away like a ragdoll added to the ridiculous nature.

During the final battle. (Not mentioning how uncomfortable the colour grading was causing an unlikable atmosphere. Especially when it became daylight, taking away the exciting and intense atmosphere.) Whedon's Superman's entry was a little plain. Maybe cliché. Banging on about "truth" and "justice". Which isn't necessarily bad. It's just, maybe, too Superman? We then see the relieved faces of all the members. Batman's giddy smile was by far the best. It was nice to see genuine happiness and I think that played an important role in communicating to us Bruce's character arc. From lowest of lows, and his conflicting attitude towards Superman in BvS, to Superman giving him incredible hope. Though it slightly made me uncomfortable.

Snyder's entry of Superman was brutal in the best way. Appearing just before Cyborg was chopped to bits. Giving us that epic moment of 'He came.” Superman mercilessly rips into Steppenwolf for the next minute or two. No breakaways. Which was a great choice. It perfectly showcased his abilities. Though in the theatrical cut he was shown to be the only capable one of saving the world and being the real “hero”, in Snyder’s cut, especially The Flash, they were all shown to be powerful with meaningful parts to play.

Bruce Wayne appeared more guilty and conflicted about what happened in BvS in Whedon's cut. Though he was overshadowed in terms of writing by Superman and Wonder Woman. He also was the one who brought in the "big guns" a.k.a Lois Lane as a contingency plan in case the Superman resurrection went awry. In which it did. In Snyder's cut it was coincidence, or the doing of Man Hunter in that mysterious scene. Bruce was also quite tense and wasn’t too much a bright beacon of hope as he was in the Snyder cut. Even despite Snyder's vision of him being reminiscent and heavily inspired by Frank Millers version; darker, older, broken and violent in a way (which is brilliant) he still had this character arc. The lover’s tiff he suffered with Diana was irritating and what I thought was superfluous. Creating an unnecessary disconnect with the group. It wasn't an interesting sub-plot/complication at all .

Bruce's character arc (from the dark BvS time, to the hopeful present) was more thoroughly shown in Snyder’s cut compared to Whedon's. I briefly mentioned Bruce's schoolgirl grin when Superman arrived right on time. Though Snyder more effectively showcased this positive rise through his obviously increased in optimistic attitude. When the team are off the defeat Steppenwolf once and for all Alfred asks Bruce how he can be so sure of the Man of Steel’s arrival. And Bruce replies full of vigour, “Faith, Alfred, faith!” And in another instance Barry questions their strength against Steppenwolf due to the amount of demons he has won against. Bruce declares that, “He’s never fought us. Not us united.” It was a powerful statement that heavily elevated excitement for the final fight.

During this final fight, Batman basically goes out on a suicide mission. Then the rest of the league join him for a family reunion. The Snyder cut better represented this with an astounding freeze-frame, slow motion shot of the team. It nicely established the power of unity in this case.

The way in which Steppenwolf was defeated was vastly altered. Changed completely. Mostly due to Darkseid’s absence in the theatrical cut. Darkseid added an important extra layer of looming fear, and even gave Steppenwolf more depth. It gave him an important reason as to why he was doing what he wasy doing. As we saw his utter dedication to Darkseid. It alerted us of the larger dangers that were present. Steppenwolf’s death in Whedon’s cut was ultimately debilitated after seeing Snyder’s version. Instead of being anti-climactically eaten alive by his bug minions as the sun rose; (maybe it’s a personal preference but I heavily dislike the daylight, especially for action scenes) his head was chopped off, first horn by horn, then from the neck. His decapitated head thrusted back through the portal into his own world, landing at the horrifying Darkseid's feet, along with the terrifying parademons. Engulfed by a fiery hellscape. The horror that Earth could have faced. But still could face. It reveals the deeper and darker enemy, beyong Steppenwolf looming just beneath the surface.

A sinister tune plays, as we see the victorious Justice League looking back at them. The portal then closes. Although a victory, we can’t help but wonder what the demonic and powerful entities, far more powerful than Steppenwolf, have in store for Earth’s future.

The Knightmare vision being apart of that future. It's set up from BvS to the very end of Justice League. It's a very intriguing part of Snyder’s vision. The moment where you can link up and see the connections between all the post-credit scenes and the “premonitions” is an epiphanic moment. It’s a whole other narrative on its own that you can analyse, hypothesize and discuss. It’s a very intriguing/exciting concept to think of what would have been Snyder’s future movie where Barry (as we saw previously reverse time) goes back to warn Bruce that “Lois Lane is the key”, to avoid the whole disastrous scenario. We can gather that he is referencing what we see at the end of Snyder's cut, Superman turned evil. The death of Lois Lane, whose skeleton we saw Superman cradle previously, we can assume had a hand in that, and possibly the Anti-Life equation too. It's an incredible narrative, and there are few things I would love more than seeing the Snyderverse come to life on this epic scale again.

We also finally get a glimpse of Snyder’s joker. A very exciting moment for me. Seeing any new iteration of the Joker is an exciting moment. Could Jared Leto somehow redeem himself?

Well, it sure was infinitely times better than the Suicide Squad rendition. This Joker was actually eerie and unsettling. I felt almost uneasy watching these scenes, and his odd laugh caused shivers to form down my spine. Jokers comments about “boy wonder”, whom we find out was indeed Bruce’s adoptive son, were heartbreaking (I believe he was actually referring to Dick instead of Jason surprisingly as his grave was once seen in a previous movie) Leaving me holding my breath, wondering what Bruce would say next, or what other wretched thing Joker could say. Of course the "reach around" comment was a bit off, but I’ll just brush over that.

We also learnt of Arthur Curry’s death, Harley Quinn’s death. Proving that Snyder had such a colossal plans for all the characters, dead and alive.

It’s a poignant feeling; to see this incredible, vast narrative, just beneath the surface, unfold. Knowing that we won’t be able to see it fully developed. As of now.

While watching these two completely different cuts of the same movie; it occurred to me and I am sure many other people, that attempting to produce such an in depth narrative intensive movie on the small scale that Whedon attempted, will commonly end in a painful, empty and superficial representation. Or maybe that really was just Whedon's vision.

As the epilogue ended, the credits rolled. Hallelujah began playing, sung by Allison Crowe. And as they rolled, in big letters the words; "For Autumn" took center focus. White against black. Clear as day. Like a bus, it hit hard. The reason I was sitting on that couch finally having the great honour to watch such a film. The courage it must have taken to continue and finish such a project is beyond admirable, it's heroic. Also non-profit. It only further proves what we already knew, that the intentions were pure, as no one ever doubted.

Also acknowledging the giant billboard on one of the buildings promoting the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. A very important cause, especially to the Snyder’s. To date fans have raised over half a million dollars to the AFSP in honour of Autumn. A truly incredible feat.

When looking at the two movies side by side, it blows my mind to see the difference that I do. The emotion, meaning, the depth. It all just made sense in Snyder's cut. The emotion was palpable, absolutley unmistakable. Things mattered more. The people mattered more. There were reasons, and purpose. It was a genuine journey for every one of the characters, and I felt it. There were so many little scenes that made so much difference that added depth and meaning, emotion.

And I cannot say such words for Whedon, though I won’t put all the blame on him. Warner Bros. is about equally responsible. .

The true, original and intended Justice League; expatiated heroes, people, stories and journeys coming together on a grandiose scale, executed with passion and care. But also giving us a bittersweet taste of Snyder’s epic trilogy that could have been.

The end of the saga; and the rest of Snyder’s visions, are left unfulfilled; as of now. But regardless, remains as one of the things I hope to see come to life. Watching this movie, and the feeling I had during and afterward is indescribable. I want to say a massive congratulations to Zack Snyder. The film was beyond breathtaking. It really is so special and it will forever have an important place in my heart.

Though I think the most important thing to take away from the Snyder's incredible work is Autumn's story.

Thank you Zack Snyder.

For Autumn.

www.imdb.com/title/tt12361974/

[justalittlebluetiefling]

After tonight, how do you think Jester's feeling? Honestly, I wasn't so sure before, but after their conversation, I'm again very certain Fjord is the one she has feelings for

All right, anon. This is a fun question for me, because we talk about Fjord’s feelings a lot, but not Jester’s. I’m going to say a few things that I never thought I’d say in this ask. For example: Fjord’s feelings have been much more obvious in the last 60 episodes than Jester’s have been. If you had told me I would say that 100 episodes ago, I would have laughed so hard. But here we are.

TLDR? Jester’s in love with Fjord and has been for a while. I’ve been going off about this occasionally since her second playlist was released. But that is what really convinced me that she had moved from ‘crush’ into ‘love’. And episode 117 helped me be even more confident in saying that.

I also wanted to put some episode 117 receipts in here, but tags in Tumblr are tricky sometimes, so I just made a companion gifset instead. (If this link messes with the tags, I’ll take it out and put it in a reblog.)

Anyway. Let’s get a cut in here so I can get carried away with the why. 2436 words of carried away.

So, like I mentioned above, Fjord’s feelings have been much more obvious than Jester’s lately. For a while, I guess. Pardon me while I just quote Laura from Talks for second. And that’s mostly because Jester backed off when she thought her advances were unappreciated. It was all part of Jester realizing that smut novels aren’t what real relationships are like. A very integral part of her development and how she’s more than her crush(es). 

The funny thing about all this... I think about this sometimes... is how Fjord didn’t actually not appreciate it. He’s just got low wisdom and didn’t realize that it meant that she like-likes him. He thought they were just goofing off. Because. Sorry, I’m briefly hopping into Fjord meta and then I’ll hop right back, I promise. But yeah. He thought they were just goofing off and I’m realizing as I type this paragraph that it never occurred to him, because “You know when someone makes you feel a way that you don't think you have any right to feel or you never thought that you might?”. Yeah. So, it wasn’t just his low wisdom. It just didn’t occur to him, because he didn’t think that he deserved to feel that way about anyone or have anyone feel that way about him. Okay. Hopping back now.

The other hilarious thing about this is that things between them weren’t awkward until she backed off and stopped overtly flirting. Which also correlates with the end of the pirate arc and how Beau, during that arc, pointed out to Fjord that Jester was jealous of Avantika.

But yeah. Jester backed off, which really threw their relationship into a whole new dynamic. I have a lot more complicated and layered feelings on the pirate arc that require a rewatch for me to properly articulate, but we know that Jester was scared during this time. She was a little scared that she didn’t really know Fjord (Re: Somebody Else being on her first playlist). But that was only temporary. That whole time made Jester start to question her feelings for Fjord. Which in turn made most of the fandom start to question them as well. But I do think that she eventually landed on “my friendship with him is more important to me than a potential relationship and if I keep acting like this, I’m going to lose him”. This is partially her realizing that life isn’t a romance novel, but I think it is also a direct result of her realizing how uncomfortable he was with the idea of being used as bait to distract Avantika. He did it, but he was not comfortable the whole time they talked about it. 

But also, Fjord was her first real friend outside of Artagan. He trusted her right away with things he didn’t tell anyone else in their group for months. She knew he was hiding his accent. She knew what happened on the Tide’s Breath. He told her before he told anyone else about how he lost his powers. They promised to protect each other and help each other on their way to their individual goals and they’re still holding up that promise every day.

ANYWAY I’M GETTING DISTRACTED I’M SORRY.

Okay, where are her feelings now. Now. She’s in love with him. When she backed off from the flirting and started focusing on just being there as a friend, it deepened their relationship. I mean, to be fair, it was already pretty deep. I promise I’m not getting off track this time, but he really did tell her things he told no one else. Sometimes it takes him longer to get around to it, because of the group, but he always ends up telling Jester everything. And that opens the door for Jester to be open with him, too, in a way that she isn’t with anyone else. 

I mean, okay. Gosh. How do I even word this? 

Jester doesn’t actively seek anyone out to talk about her feelings. There are two times I can think of off the top of my head that she’s broached the subject first. One: when she was looking for Beau and ended up talking to Veth about how she felt about the kiss that wasn’t a kiss. And Two: the Jellyfish talk, when she asked Fjord if he ever gets sad. But Jester keeps everything buried pretty deeply. So, the fact that Fjord is constantly going out of his way to ask her if she’s okay and the fact that he pulled her aside to tell her that if she ever needs to talk, she can talk to him. That’s a huge deal. And I think she’s still scared to take him up on it, because on top of all these things is that layer of awkwardness. Fjord and Jester are just awkward with each other right now. And their feelings for each other are what makes it awkward.

If the awkwardness was one-sided and only coming from Fjord, I’d say that her feelings had gone away. But it’s not. It’s always two-sided. There’s so much tension in all of their conversations, because while they talk about everything else, there’s one thing they haven’t talked about. Or... I guess it’s a couple things at this point. But they’ve never talked about the kiss that wasn’t a kiss. That’s what I mean specifically at this point. It’s just never been brought up. Which is so weird, because the other times (I think it’s two? Maybe it’s one. I’m doubting myself.) that Fjord’s saved Jester’s life with a potion, she brought it up. She made a production about it. But the kiss was different, because she didn’t know if it was a real kiss. I think she’s come around to it not being a real kiss, but it’s got to still bug her. 

But that’s planted this seed of awkwardness in all their solo interactions that hasn’t gone away. Jester’s been pushing her feelings for Fjord aside. Or trying to. But he keeps doing things that make her have hope again and it’s getting to a point that she can’t ignore that feeling. Like... He wanted her to be the one to go with him into the wreckage of the Tide’s Breath. The whole day after the blue dragon encounter, he was hovering. He wanted her to have a potion so that she could be safe and he said that he wasn’t being awkward he was disarming her. He dove off the side of a tree when she fell to save her. He tells her how much her help has meant to him in Kravaraad. He makes sure they go visit her dad. He runs after her to go rescue her mama and then he tells her that he’ll wear a stupid hat if she wants him to and that she looks lovely while implying that he’d like to look at her in that dress all the time. And then he asks her if she’d like to get dinner with him instead of go look for their friends. AND THEN he tells her that he likes it when she’s feeling his stomach looking for the orb. He was constantly checking in with her during Travlercon to make sure she was safe and comfortable. He launched himself into the air over an active volcano and begged her to let go and stay with them. AND TO MAKE MATTERS MORE CONFUSING FOR HER. He hugged her twice and then he willingly danced with her even though he didn’t know how AND THEN he gave her this tiny unicorn statue, because he knows how much she loves things like that. And now he’s given her the necklace that was meant to protect him, because he’s more concerned about her safety than his own. He told her that he’s having a hard time focusing on his future, because his past keeps getting in the way and he wants to deal with that before........ AND THEN HE SAYS he’s going to be thinking about how she helped him all night.

LIKE.

I got a little carried away again, sorry.

Here’s the deal.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. There has been nothing in canon to make me think that Jester’s feelings have gone away. Everything I can see implies that they’ve deepened. But she’s scared. She’s never really been in love before. It is absolutely terrifying (or it is for me) to admit when you’re in love. Especially when you don’t know if your feelings are reciprocated. Or if you think they’re unwanted. And she thought hers were unwanted. But she’s still been doing little things this whole time. She’s still shown signs of jealousy. She still thirsts over him, just not as openly as she did before. She gets super shy whenever they have one-on-ones and that makes her get awkward in the cutest way. Jester started to be careful with how she was around Fjord, but he’s been making it pretty clear that he doesn’t want her to be careful with him and I think she’s starting to realize that. It’s giving her hope that maybe her feelings are wanted. 

Also, the fact that there’s no in-between for these two? They’re either incredibly emotional when they talk to each other or incredibly awkward or BOTH. They are radiating “in love with your best friend” energy. The difference is that Fjord isn’t afraid of ruining the friendship and Jester is. Or... well... yeah. Actually, that’s what I mean. I think Jester’s coming around to not being afraid. She’s got hope again that they might be something more. And I think that hope is starting to be fun for her again instead of scary.

OKAY I’m almost done. I want to very briefly talk about that gifset that I made, because I made receipts for a reason, damn it. Let’s talk ONLY about the conversation in 117.

Gif 1: This one is right after this exchange. Jester: I mean... it's worth a try. He's met all of us, so he could potentially scry on anyone, I guess, now. But maybe it'll keep me from being seen if I scry on him. I don't know how it all works. // Fjord: I guess we'd find out the next time we did it. // Jester: Yeah. Like, she looks down at the necklace and just smiles, because Fjord has literally just told her that his safety doesn’t matter as much as hers. Fjord went out of his way to do this thing for her and she just looks so touched.

Gifs 2 and 3: These are both just Jester laughing over Fjord talking about her face when she’s scrying. They’re goofing off and being silly. And gif 3 in particular is just... again. She’s having fun! With Fjord! And she likes that. 

Gif 4: Jester just asked Fjord “how are you?” and he started up with that big, goofy grin. And she can’t even get through calling her question stupid without smiling. Like, she’s reacting to his smile. And it’s kind of funny, because I think she doesn’t understand why he’s smiling so much in that moment, but she still can’t help but smile back.

Gif 5: I feel like I need to close all of that before.... That’s such an interesting reaction and SO TELLING. Like, that small smile and then she kind of takes a breath and then she still can’t not smile over it. SHE KNOWS. She really hopes that it means what she wants it to mean. And she wants it to mean something. 

Gif 6: She’s once again reacting to a Fjord smile. You can see the way the corners of her mouth keep trying to smile. Because Fjord is just touched and telling her that yeah, she should send a message to Kotho. And then it’s the things she’s doing with her hand there, too. She’s all nervous energy and can’t really hold still. There’s that hope again.

Gif 7: She’s SO HAPPY because she’s helping him. SO HAPPY. And again with the hands! So much nervous energy.

Gif 8: It's just a spell! It's easy to do. Again with the hands!!! I mean, okay. Speculation and projection. I’m aware. This is just something I do and I see it in Jester a lot. Where, she’s got to do something with her hands so they don’t do what she really wants them to. I mean, SERIOUSLY. And the way she smiles at him at the end of it. There’s a lot for her to process about this exchange and I think it’s starting to hit her. How much this means. What this might mean. And she’s happy. She’s excited.

Gif 9: I will think about that all night. Still the nervous energy. I won’t repeat that paragraph. But like. Fuck. Fjord told her that he was going to think about that all night. I kind of want to yell right now. In a good way. My heart just hurts in a good way over this moment. I can’t even speculate on her emotions here because that’s like... huge. There was so much tension here. Jester hasn’t had anyone say anything like this to her before. She doesn’t know how to react. And Fjord is also holding himself back. Uh, this is Fjord HOLDING HIMSELF BACK. What the fuck. I mean. Okay I have to move on. I have nothing productive to say here.

Gif 10: I guess I was wrong. This isn’t only about the conversation, but also about the moment later. Where he thinks she’s going to scry when she’s going to send and she realizes that he was going to do what she asked him to before. She is just so pleased that he intended to follow through. I choose to believe this is 100% what Jester’s face actually did in the moment. And I love this because it’s only awkward on Fjord’s end this time. Jester is just happy.

I’ve gotta end this thing, guys. Why are you even still listening to me ramble???

I guess what I ultimately want this whole answer to be: Jester’s in love with Fjord. Fjord makes her so happy. And she is starting to let herself hope that he’s in love with her, too. She can see the possibility of a future with him again and finally letting herself believe that it might happen. So, yeah. That’s where I think Jester’s feelings are. 

Hope you enjoyed my mini breakdown over Jester and how much Fjord’s support has meant to her! 

[if-one-of-us-falls]

A few days ago I saw some screenshots from Charlie Kaufman's 2012 Chaos Walking screenplay (posted by yer-nothing) and got intrigued, so last night I read through the whole thing and we need to talk about this.

Let me start off by saying that I'm not a big cinema buff and don't really know how screenplays work. I'm a huge fan of the books. I haven't seen the new movie yet (which, to my understanding, has a completely different screenplay) but I've watched every clip that came out and I might compare them to the Kaufman screenplay at certain points. Also, this post contains spoilers to the Kaufman screenplay and to The Knife of Never Letting Go!

I reread TKoNLG recently so it's fresh in my mind (as if it ever leaves lol) and I was impressed by how loyally the screenplay follows the book. Not only does it keep most of the scenes, but it also depicts them very closely to how they happened in the book, sometimes beat by beat. Most importantly to me, everyone is kept in character. So much so that reading the few little bits that were added and did not appear in the book made me smile because I could totally see the characters behaving this way. Kaufman understood the story and the characters he was given and expanded on them with a very light touch rather than trying to rewrite them completely - which was my #1 problem with what I've seen from the movie.

Todd is very obviously not aged up in this screenplay. Not only because he states it in his mantra, but also because he acts like book!Todd. Same with Viola. Kaufman really nailed their dynamic and the way their relationship evolves over the course of the story. A lot of Todd's narration in the book was turned into bits of Noise, and while I'm not sure how that would work on screen, I think it was done beautifully and kept the spirit and the context of the book. There is still a little bit of the romance set-up (with Todd clearly thinking about Viola being pretty etc.) but it's quite subtle and in-character, not as pushy as the movie clips felt.

Ben and Cillian still don't get a lot of screentime, but you really can't miss that they're a couple and their relationship to Todd and to eachother is established effectively.

The character who was changed the most has to be the Mayor. The screenplay gave him the power to direct Noise at Todd from a distance and basically speak to him all the time, and his intentions towards Todd are very clear and blatant. I'm not sure how I feel about it, but it is intriguing (and more than a little creepy). I suppose that Kaufman's purpose was to set up the Mayor as a more prominent character, since Aaron is the main villain in book 1.

One of my favorite added moments was the Robert Frost joke. First because it was so in-character, but also because it shows them finding common ground despite their differences. Todd doesn't have Viola's education, but instead of making fun of him for not knowing the poem the screenplay lets him come up with his own poem, which feels exactly like something Ben would have taught him. And he shows that he cares about Viola and asks her to explain rather than letting her dismiss what she said as a stupid joke. And they trust each other enough by that time that her explaining doesn't feel condescending to him like it did before. I loved that.

I actually wasn't too fond of how Kaufman rewrote the scene in the cemetery where Ben explains what really happened in Prentisstown. I think it was important in the book when Todd was the one to figure it out, and letting Viola explain felt weaker to me. But what really bugged me was changing Ben's hope speech to talk about love. It wasn't really the point in my opinion, and he barely even met Viola anyway. Overall I guess it just felt a little too Hollywood-y (can I really be surprised, though?).

Of course, a few scenes and Characters had to be cut. The most sorely missed one was Wilf, but at least the screenplay still had the Sea of Things. Sadly it didn't have gorgeous visual of them laying in the cart and riding through the song of Here, and Todd's journey to rescue Viola after Aaron took her felt a little shorter. Viola's fake accent and calling herself and Todd Hildy and Ben was cleverly integrated into the Carbonel Downs scene, so at least that wasn't lost, but that part did feel a little rushed - we didn't get the full extent of how angry VIola was at their sexism and the tension of Ben facing the Law wasn't as intense as in the book (but it might just be that it was only a screenplay. )

The scene where Viola reads Todd his ma's book was beautiful (though a little bit of comic relief was inserted that I think I'd rather cut off). The moment where Todd looks at Viola and realizes he can read her... holy shit. That was powerful. I could almost hear the background music.

Aaron was as crazy as he was in the book - which is great - except that his ranting took a bit more of a slut-shaming angle which felt just a little bit off and distracting from how scary he is.

I really liked the circular ending and the visual elements, but I'm not sure how I feel about everything that happens in that scene. I guess it comes down again to the Mayor being so blatant. In the book, this scene is our first real introduction to him, but the Kaufman screenplay is not attempting to maintain that sense of dread and mystery. I wonder what a sequel would look like since getting to know the Mayor was such a big part of book 2. Anyway I'm sure If I were in the theater when Todd's Noise said "Listen, Viola: I have hope for us" I would break down crying, if I wasn't already.

Overall I really loved that screenplay. It captured the spirit of the book. Not to complain about the movie again, but I wish I could see the Kaufman screenplay getting produced. This is the movie I wanted. It feels like such a waste of potential, but I'm grateful to have had the opportunity to at least read the screenplay.

Anyway if anyone has thoughts about this screenplay or Chaos Walking in general I would love to hear from you! I can't believe it existed since 2012 and I only found it now.

[nightswithkookmin]

Hye Goldy, I love your blog. I'm happy to find a jikooker who isn't afraid to address real and non-idealistic aspects of jikook relationship. My question has to do with Jungkook's reactions to jimin initiating any contact with him, be it physical or emotional. Jk reactions go between nervousness, annoyance, embarrassment, uncomfortableness and withdrawals in on himself.

Like when Jimin gets playful and he gets close or touchy, or when JK has a hard time and Jimin shows his worry for him and tries to comfort him, tries to reach out for him. For example during run 100 or 101 episode when JK got hit by ball and jimin went to check on him and kept insisting asking him if he was ok, jk kind of ignored him. Or during the voice acting run episode when he said he was cold and Jimin hugged him and his eyes bugged out of his head ans his body went all tense. There are so many instances like this.

Jk on the other hand is sometimes bold, setting course for some of the most questionable jikook moments. But often he's subdued and laid back. Again, another example, would be when Yoongi hit the ball directly at jimin. Compare to Jimin over worried self he just went over and looked at him once and when he saw Jimin was laughing he went back.

What do you think about this? How do you explain it?

How do I explain what?👀

Are his reactions a problem?👀

Do you want to free Jimin?👀

Chilee Anon, you are bold. Don't let JK hear you say these things. Lmho.

I think for the most part, you are just pointing out the differences in their personalities and their unique ways of expressing themselves in general not just towards eachother.

Jikook are two very distinct individuals and they express themselves differently. I feel a lot of people forget that sometimes but it's actually not that deep.

Jk is naturally reserved, introverted and not overly nurturing or affectionate. He has said this himself and Jimin has described him as not very good at expressing his emotions or communicating his feelings as well.

You can't expect him to express himself or his affections the same way an extroverted honorary hufflepuff and natural nurturer with no shame like Jimin would. That's asking for too much, I think. Lol.

I don't think there is anything wrong with JK or the way he expresses himself towards Jimin to be honest. As I keep saying, Jikook negotiate their needs most times to make for the differences in their personalities. Their relationship is not one sided. If there are aspects of JK's personality that impedes on the quality of love Jimin requires to feel satisfied in their dynamics Jimin would say so and I believe JK would work on it and vice versa. I mean we've seen them do that repeatedly over the years.

Jimin loves to be loved and he's said so himself and I believe he knows exactly what makes him feel loved and what doesn't. In the Grammy reaction video, he literally hopped over his soul mate and best friend to get a hug from JK bumping his head in the process. He was seeking emotional warmth from him. I don't think if JK's touches were cold he would keep turning to him for it.

At fan signs when Jk isn't next to him, he grabs the mic and tells Jungkook his place is beside him.

At awards when JK is having fun with his friends, he hugs his hyungs for comfort till JK comes running to him. When Hobi and JK are off in the corner playing kids, he glares at them till JK comes to stand behind him and blows on the back of his head to placate him.

On red carpets from the Grammys to Jingle bell when he can't stand next to JK because they have to stand in their official positions he literally breaks down- well almost breaks down.

There is something warm about JK that doesn't translate to the screens.

Jk does the same thing. When he needs Jimin's presence he grabs him by the neck and pulls him to himself. When he is feeling anxious and needs to calm down he rubs on Jimin's arms to soothe himself.

During performances when he's waited for JM to interact with him and JM isn't doing that, he walks to him to wrap his hands around him or sing with him. He cheats his way through games to be on the same team with JM, he literally teleports his ass to be next to JM. He throws tantrums when he can't be next to him.

Jimin didn't wake him up once and he whined about it in interviews. Jimin left him out of a VLive and he started a revolution on VLive.

There is something they both need from eachother's presence and they take it from eachother when they need it- as far as their need for affections and intimacy go. In my opinion.

They take up a lot of space in eachother's lives, riding together, spending time together outside of work, getting in eachother's personal space and groping eachother excessively- not that I'm complaining. I mean, I wanna see it all. Lol. But it would be counterintuitive for either of them, especially JK to do all of these things, be an accomplice of, participate in and initiate certain intimate moments with JM himself if Jimin made him in anyway uncomfortable, annoyed or embarrassed.

It also says a lot about BTS and BigHit if it is true, that JK is uncomfortable being intimate with Jimin, for having sat and watched this sordidity go on between Jikook for years without intervening, or standing up for JK, to protect him against Jimin imposing himself on jK in that way, by calling JM out for making the youngest among them feel uncomfortable with his skinship and gestures towards him. It would be a failure on their part not to uphold their common duty to protect and act in the interests of JK as the hyungs, agent and guardians of JK.

It would be a failure and a huge betrayal on JM's part too. Jimin is and portrays himself as a very considerate person with a high emotional intelligence quotient who cares about and loves JK. It would be insensitive and not so loving or intelligent of him to not know his actions, skinship and affections make another person uncomfortable or annoyed.

And for him to persist in these endeavors throughout the years knowing full well they are not welcomed, reciprocated or enjoyed by JK would not just be unconscionable on his part but would make him dumb, abusive and vile- a rhetoric anti Jimin, anti Jikook and most Tuktukkers peddle on these streets and I don't blame them. Ignorance and hatred will do that to a person.

This rhetoric implicates not just JM but JK himself, BTS and the company as they all have stock and owe a duty of care towards eachother and JK as the youngest amongst them, to create and foster a work environment where everyone's bodily integrity, mind and spirit is respected and upheld. One in which they all feel safe within.

Let's talk ships for a second. You think Tae or Suga will let Jimin make JK uncomfortable in that way and not stand up for JK or call JM out for that? Tae? Taehyung? Sis, there's a reason Yeontan doesn't like him. He is over protective. Lol. That dog just wanna walk down the streets with Min Holly on his arm.

Let me paint you a picture. When JK got injured on stage and he went to JM and JM comforted him but his part was coming up so he left to go sing, Taehyung stood by JK and followed him around the stage never taking his eyes off him- even though JK was just gravitating towards JM because he was feeling vulnerable and JM had no idea what was happening behind him.

In Run 116, another recent instance of JK's vulnerable moments, because to me he was dealing with a broken heart- because Jikook had broken up around that period in my opinion, JK was leaning into Tae for that comfort.

Feel free to disagree anyone but I'm afraid I have to stand by my opinion and observations and understanding of their dynamics. Lol.

Notice how the one time JM initiated skinship with JK in that episode, because JK had spent the entire episode closed off to him, Jimin kept stealing glances at the members? His eyes kept shifting and he looked almost nervous? Now why do you think that is?

The members will not allow Jimin to impose himself on JK like that.

It's the second time in years I've seen Jimin act like he needed permission to interact with JK. Did you see the blackswan shoot interview around that period? Tae and Kook around early January through to the On period?

Tae would not stand and watch Jimin play JK's feelings like that, take advantage of him or make him uncomfortable. Neither would Suga quite frankly. RM wouldn't stand for it nor will Jin or Hobi.

If you noticed any thing off with Jikook around the period you mentioned, it's probably because they were getting back together after a breakup and their interactions were in the aftermath of a hiccup in their relationship. Again, my opinion.

Compare that Run moment you mentioned where JM was hit in the eye to the recent Grammy reaction behind scenes when JM hit his head and was hurting or even to all the events post October... same vibe as On Era, different intensities. We will talk about the October timeline again soon. I think I've seen enough to form an opinion. Lol.

My point is, Jikook have unique love needs and love languages. Jimin speaks JK's love language even if that language is not JK's own way of expression.

When asked what JK liked about Jimin, JK said it was his shamelessness. Deep it. We find attractive in others qualities we admire or lack in ourselves.

JK harbors a lot of shame over a lot of things. He is not Jimin. He may panic when JM suddenly pounces on him because he knows JM is wild, shameless and reckless but that doesn't mean he doesn't enjoy it.

That compliment he gave Jimin about his shameless to me was also a confession of his own shame and reservations around his expressions of self- something I feel he has been working to overcome through out the years. It's only in recent times that the members have said he's become a bit shameless himself.

JK describes Jimin's self expressions as sexy and shameless. He's said he's wanted to look sexy too and perform a sexy dance too. He may not have openly admitted this but I believe shamelessness is a quality he wants in himself.

To be shameless implies, on a certain level, JM lacks guilt, is impervious to judgment and doesn't give regard to his environment when he expresses himself.

Jimin may not have a lot of guilt about his sexuality but he has a lot of fear and JK may not have a lot of fear in him but he has a lot of guilt about his sexuality and both are not less gay.

All these beautiful moments of expressions from Jimin you seemly applaud were at one point viewed as disgraceful acts or acts of shame and worthy of condemnation that in JK's view perhaps shouldn't have been expressed so openly by Jimin or any gay man for that matter- the emphasis is mine.

I'm going off on a tangent but stick with me.

That shame he associates with JM's self expressions on the surface may just be as a result of his shyness and introvertedness but I also think his internalized homophobia brought on by his own past repressed homosexuality could be an underlying factor. In my opinion.

It's very unsettling, as a closeted person, to watch other queer people in close proximity to you perform sexuality and queerness so openly without fear or shame and be met with the level of ridicule JM was met with in those early days parading himself as the queer jest of the group. It was cringe merely watching those moments from the screen.

If he viewed his queerness as wrong in any way on a fundamental level, then we cannot reasonably expect him to suddenly have a complete 360 turn around or a hundred percent shift from this mentality. It doesn't work like. Being closeted can have lasting effects on a person even long after they have come out of the closet.

I believe JK is aware of this. Do I think he is happy with it? No. But I believe he is working on it. Like the members said, he has changed alot this past year and has a lot of self awareness now. In his Weverse interview, they pointed out how he is constantly working to improve himself.

It is why I think often when he panics and pulls away in such moments he tries to reestablish contact with Jimin to reassure him he is not rejecting him. I think I pointed it out in my video analysis on YT. He knows he has a lot to work through and I know JM is patient with him when it comes to that. I see them as working through a lot of baggage as queer men honestly. They're undoing the toxic narratives of queerness and masculinity, learning not to be afraid of being themselves openly etc. They are gonna get there- eventually.

JM talks about their relationship and uses the word love to describe it and JK shifts uncomfortably. An interviewer playfully asks if JM is not his style and he panics and stutters, causing JM to butt in and save his ass with 'don't answer that.' Jimin talks about JK hugging him to sleep at a fan sign and JK shuts it down telling JM he doesn't like such things said about him because to him it was weird for JM to say stuff like that.

And you'd often hear JM asking JK if it was ok for him to say certain things or do certain things in regards to him immediately after he'd said or done them- is it ok to say I like you? Is it ok to say you cuddle me to sleep. You don't like this? You don't like that?

Clearly, JM felt the need to ask these and had to ask because perhaps JK had expressed concerns about certain things JM said and did openly in regards to him that he didn't feel comfortable with.

Jimin over expresses himself which is equally problematic if we are being honest. And JK under expresses himself, we been knew.

Over the years, he's learned to be more brazen and less reserved but he still is the same person at his core: an introvert. His introvertedness doesn't answer for his actions and choices but it answers for his mannerisms and the things you've pointed out is one of them.

I have said I don't buy into this whole JM fell first, JK fell harder narrative. For Jimin to have fallen first he would have had to be queer in those early days but I argue he wasn't ergo that entire conjecture is bogus to me. Lol.

JM over expresses himself and part of those expressions to me are mere performances divorced from his sexuality. Most of JK's expressions flow from his sexuality and I feel he is not very good at compartmentalizing. But that's not his fault. That's the consequences of being queer in a space where performative queerness is applauded but actual gayness is frowned upon and Jikook are a reflection of this.

People are ok with Jimin being gay as long as he is not gay. They are ok making gay jokes about him untill we tell them he is actually gay in a gay relationship with another gay member- then it's don't assume his sexuality and project and heteronormativity. Smh.

And the more these upcoming Idols use Jikook as the blueprint to their success by imitating and performing the queerness of Jikook for entertainment purposes the more the lines blur on what is acceptable queerness and what is political queerness.

He's built a persona and a facade for himself over the years and this persona incorporates to some degree, what you can call queer aesthetics, just a dash of gayness to keep things interesting. But it's a facade nevertheless.

Jimin is not more gay than JK because he over expresses and JK is not less gay because he under expresses and one is not better than the other.

Jimin doesn't love JK more just because he over expresses and JK doesn't love JM less just because he under expresses- if that's what you were implying by your Ask.

I read a comment from months ago under a BinJin couple video analysis where people were saying the Lady was too stiff around the Man at awards hence she was uncomfortable being around him therefore they were not real- HUH!!! Jokes on them.

I think people need to expand their vocabulary beyond he is uncomfortable ergo he doesn't like Jimin. If anything being nervous around someone you like is the first indication you like them. Lmho.

Jikook make eachother nervous. Jimin had to drag JK out of the Kitchen when he was cooking because he didn't want JK to watch him cook. Lol.

In the New Jersey VLive, Jimin gulped looking at the screen trying to keep his cool but JK clocked it and that's why he looked up at him- omg these two. Jk got them in some deep shit that day. Lmho.

Sometimes Jimin intentionally puts JK on the spot, like he did in the Japan self interviews when he blurted out the best part of his day is waking up to see JK's face. JK was shooketh. Lmho.

Did you see JK's face when JM blew him an air kiss at the award? JK could never. Lmho.

In spite of all these reactions, JK keeps going back for more. In spite of his own reactions to these moments, JK keeps praising JM for it. Does he want Jimin to stop doing those. I wish I could say yes- but I'm scared of his frying pans. Lol.

Hope this helps.

Signed,

GOLDY

[welllpthisishappening]

21 for the kiss prompts. because I am me LOL

Alright, so, full disclosure, this is not CS fic. I was going to write CS fic for this. i was! I had this vaguely angsty Emma gets hurt and Killian loses his mind thing happening, but then—I didn’t write that. Instead, here’s Will Scarlet gets hurt and Belle French loses her mind and it’s hockey. It’s 2,000 words! I don’t know how that happened. Anyway, the prompt here was “bloody kiss” and I love Will Scarlet with the force of a thousand suns. If you guys want to send more kiss prompts, I’m still waiting for people to respond to my emails.

“You’re mad.”

“Your powers of deduction are truly unparalleled. What gave me away, exactly?”

Will bit his lower lip. Let his teeth dig down until he tasted blood and, well—more blood, he supposed. Six stitches later, though, and there wasn’t much blood left on his face, just a pair of narrow eyes doing their best to glare a hole through his cranium and he didn’t think that was entirely possible. 

Biology had never been his strong suit, really. Unless you counted hauling off and punching some rat-faced bastard on the Caps who couldn’t keep his goddamn mouth shut about a possible offsides that had maybe happened two periods before and they’d been winning and it was fine. Totally fine. This was his job. Punching and bruising up assholes. Just a little bit, to remind them who they were playing and what was on the line and—

It was entirely possible Belle’s eyes were not entirely human. 

His face flushed. Heat raced through either one of his cheeks, threatening what he could only assume was the structural integrity of his own eyes because Will couldn’t remember when he’d decided to widen them, exactly. Just that they were starting to dry out a little bit and Ariel was going to kill him. 

She’d made that very clear post-game. 

There might be a two-person line to wreak havoc, now. 

“You get this little pinch between your eyebrows,” Will said, leaning forward until the top of his head nearly hit the bottom of her chin, “makes it easy to tell.”

Belle huffed. Crossed her arms. Nearly punched him in the face, which would have been something close to the peak of irony at this point, and then maybe Ariel wouldn’t threaten to kill him again. No, that was wishful thinking. 

It’d be a miracle if they were allowed uptown later. Ariel had probably sent out an APB, or whatever the culinary equivalent of that was. No admittance until the blood had dried off his forehead and he laid prostrate at her feet, begging forgiveness for the error of his ways. 

Like hell, he would.

This was his job. He was the—

Fuck, maybe he was a goon. He hadn’t scored in a while. Not even a secondary assist, or anything. Skating at the edge of the blue line on a fledgling power play did not an All-Star make, and, well, now that he thought about it, maybe Will had started jawing first. There were mumbled insults, at least. 

From him, specifically. More than once, actually. 

“I don’t think you’re supposed to be back here, y’know.”

The pinch got—

Pinchier. Deeper. Like a tiny, little crevice between what Will was starting to realize were meticulously cared-for eyebrows and maybe he should get a CT scan or an MRI or something because it had taken him this long to notice she was also wearing his jersey. Too-long sleeves grazed the slight bend of her knuckles, looking as if she was actively stopping herself from fisting her hands at her side and that thought wasn’t supposed to make him smile. 

Still. 

Will’s lips tugged up. His eyes thinned. Nose crinkled ever so slightly. Something that had been growing increasingly familiar in the last few months of the season jumped between his ribs, like little flutters of wholly imaginary wings, and she kept wearing his jersey. Kept coming to games, and that was good because they’d gotten past the labels and expectations, all of which were sky-high on the NHL’s most romance-prone hockey team. 

God, maybe he wasn’t just a goon. Maybe he was a complete and total asshole. 

“This is Cap’s fault,” Will announced, and he’d been ready for the pinch. He was less prepared for those eyebrows he was starting to become a tad obsessed with to soar up Belle’s forehead, past the swoop of bangs that regularly messed with his cognizant reasoning. 

She scoffed. “Are you fucking with me?”

“No, but maybe when we get back to—”

“I will kick you in the shins, Scarlet, I swear to every God you can think of.”

He tried not to deflate. Really, he did. But his name seemed to crack out of her, punching the bridge of his nose like Belle had actually pulled her right arm back and her scoff was more like an exhale that time. That had never happened. 

Even before. Before the labels and the attempts at setting up Killian and watching that entire season and how often he stared longing at Emma, before Regina and Locksley continued to be parents extraordinaire and the jealousy started to eat away at him. Slowly, but surely and he never talked about that, but he figured she knew because Belle knew everything and—

“Bet you twenty bucks you could name more gods than I could.”

Another sigh. A tilt of her head. It made her bangs shift. He wasn’t sure what was happening in his chest. Expanding and contracting, a painful rhythm that hurt way more than the stitches or the shitty metaphors and he was glad she’d snuck into the locker room. Will didn’t want her anywhere else. 

Naming conventions, aside. 

“I’m sorry—” “—I love you.”

He almost fell over. Impressive, since Will was still sitting down and his feet didn’t entirely reach the floor from that position. His jaw dropped. He hated that. Partially because it hurt and mostly because he should have been way cooler, wanted to be way cooler, but there were dots of red on his girlfriend’s cheeks and teeth digging into her lower lip, now, and he resolutely ignored the ache in his calves when he slid back to his feet. 

Curling an arm around her waist, he didn’t think much about the precise way he yanked her. Forward. Directly into his chest and that didn’t leave much room to bend his knees, but Will was less concerned with specifics and the staging of this than actually getting to the good part. 

The kissing part. 

Plus, Belle pushed up on her toes. So, that helped. 

He groaned. Loudly, like embarrassingly loud. As soon as her head tilted and he could get his mouth on hers and they were all hands and lips and whatever she was doing with her tongue, tracing the lip he’d been so intent on biting through just a few moments before. Bending his knees did give Will some more leverage. To pull her even closer, moving his arm and ignoring her soft protests. 

Most of them died when he managed to get a hand under her left thigh. 

She groaned. Something to be said about symmetry, Will assumed. Although he also didn’t really...care. About the saying, mostly. Not when he was melting and falling, dropping into the deep end of a pool that was a shock to his system and the best thing that had ever happened to him and she was the best thing that had ever happened to him. Bar none. 

Especially when she did that tongue thing. 

Closing his eyes, he knew he had to tilt his head. Had to breathe and stay conscious and he didn’t want to think about the medical requirements of a professional hockey player at a time like that, but he knew consistent awareness of his surroundings was probably fairly important and the roar of triumph blaring through his brain made that a little difficult. Breathing would have to be enough for now. 

“I can’t—” Belle’s shoulders heaved. Fingers dragged across the back of Will’s neck and he had to admit he was fairly impressed with her balance. Her right foot wasn’t on the ground. “Shit, I—” He pulled her lip between his teeth, tried to memorize the next hitch of her breath and he was about five-point two-three seconds away from losing his mind. Rocking his hips up was a very bad idea. He did it anyway. “Babe, I can’t think when you do that.”

Everything was spinning. He was spinning. No, that wasn’t true. He wasn’t spinning. He was standing and touching and there was barely any color left in Belle’s eyes. 

Pride prickled at the back of Will’s brain. Until pain joined the fray, making a glorious and unwelcome return at the precise moment he realized there was moisture on his cheek again. Warm and red and Ariel was going to kill him. 

“Cap and Emma were making out in the hallway,” Will explained, “pre-game. Nothing they don’t normally do, and I don’t even think they knew I was there.”

“Is any of this supposed to make me feel better?”

He nodded. “I love you, too. Like it’s ridiculous how in love with you I am.”

Silence. As much as there could be in a locker room, at least. Water fell from shower heads a few hundred feet away, the low murmur of questions and Lucas-approved answers, squeaking sneakers and clacking heels, and the familiar sound of wheels rolling across linoleum as the equipment hampers moved down the hall. 

Will took a deep breath. 

Slowly, through his nose. Keeping the nerves off his face was harder than he expected, and even more ridiculous than whatever he’d just proclaimed because Belle had proclaimed first and it was entirely possible they were both colossal idiots. That put them on even ground, though. 

He appreciated that. 

“Why were you mad, ma moitié?”

There was the pinch, again. “Why do you think?” Will shook his head, brushing hair away from her eyes and he knew he didn’t imagine that sigh, either. Softer. More content. All that previous even ground. “Because I—” Belle started, and the color hadn’t left her face yet. “I know you think you’ve got to be this guy. Out there defending, not just the goal but the people and that’s...I’m super into that.”

“But?”

“But it makes me so nervous, I could spit.’

Will genuinely had no idea what noise he made. It might not have been human, really. Tearing out of his throat, his eyes bugged and he bent over without really meaning to, forehead finding Belle’s shoulder like that was the only reasonable landing place. He was still bleeding. Or bleeding again, whatever. 

“Say that again,” he mumbled. Into her jersey. His jersey. Whatever, part two. 

“Spit,” she repeated, making sure to enunciate every letter, “because I know you can hold your own in a fight, and that’s how you think you make a difference on this team, but—”

“It is that’s why.”

“Was my shin-kicking threat not threatening?”

He kissed exactly where his lips were. “Not really, no.”

“‘Cuz I’ll totally do it, I swear. To all those gods and goddesses and then they’ll descend from on high and tell you that they also think you’re an idiot who should know that letting some rat on the ice get under your skin is exactly what they’re trying to do. Plus, it’s way better when you check them, y’know?”

Lifting his head didn’t hurt. Made him a little nervous, anxiety churning his gut and this was not the way Will thought this would happen. Maybe he could get Belle to kick Killian too. For the making out. And the unspoken frustration. He was definitely an idiot. “Is it just?”

“Don’t make me say it.”

“Don’t have to. You’re very easy to read.”

Belle lifted her eyebrows. More. “That so?’

“You think it’s super attractive when I check another dude.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Didn’t have to. Also, I love you.”

“You mentioned that before, yeah.”

“And I am sorry for freaking you out.” Sigh number three wasn’t quite as resigned as the others, but it still left guilt rising in the back of Will’s throat and every single inch of him froze. As soon as Belle leaned around him, grabbed a far-too-large handful of gauze and started wiping blood off his cheek. “That’s way too much, babe.”

“Ariel can deal.”

“Ya gonna kick her too?”

“I’ll consider it,” Belle mumbled, back on both feet again. For, like, two seconds. Before she pushed back up on her toes, kissed the corner of Will's mouth, and added, “Don’t do that to me again, ok?”

“Aye, aye, Cap.”

He had much better reflexes than her. Pulling her back to his side before either one of her shoes could land a blow was easy and bordering almost close to joyful and that was a strange thing for him to be, but it was also easy and somehow even more simple and Ariel let them into the restaurant that night. They stayed for all of fifteen minutes. 

And Will told Belle he loved her once every five minutes on the cab ride back to his apartment. 

He timed it, and everything. Just to make sure the color stayed in her cheeks.

[snowdice]

Folds in Paper (Chapter 10: All The Subliminal Things)[Folds in Time Universe]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Janus/Patton, Remus & Roman, eventual Logan/Virgil (maybe more)

Characters:

Main: Janus, Patton, Remus

Appear: Remy, Emile, Virgil, Logan, Roman

Summary: Janus, a disillusioned senior agent working for the Time Preservation Initiative, struggles to find meaning in a world where time travel could change everything about your life’s history in less than a moment. When time distortions start popping up, threatening the timeline and the fabric of reality as he knows it, it becomes a race against the clock to fix the damage before everything unravels. And the problem with time travel… you never how long you have before the clock strikes 12 and your time is up.

With a partner who has more mysteries in his past than Janus had anticipated and an enigmatic free agent time traveler mucking about time always with a clever pun or a time appropriate pet name on his lips, Janus will need to figure out what went wrong with time, and more importantly, how to fix it.

Chapter Summary:  

I'm a sucker for all the subliminal things No one knows about you (about you) about you (about you) And you're making the typical me break my typical rules It's true, I'm a sucker for you.

-Jonas Brothers in the song “Sucker”

Notes: Time travel AU, mystery, enemies to lovers, alcohol

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

I also have a playlist on youtube (because Spotify didn’t have one of the songs I wanted).

AO3 Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

“And I thought Remus was going to be the most disgusting roommate in this equation,” Lena grumbled. Janus and Lena were apparently the earlier risers in the group of office mates as Fred was still curled up around a pillow and Remus was sprawled out under his desk.

Janus flipped her off.

“Protein infused Poptarts and caffeinated orange juice for breakfast?” she asked. “Just eat an energy bar and have a cup of coffee like a normal person.”

He took another pointed bite of his Poptart.

“You’re a horrible roommate. This is why they gave us different partners.”

“Yeah, well you snore, asshole,” Janus said after finishing off his meal.

“I’d tell you to go eat shit, but you already did that once this morning.”

A pillow flew across the room and somehow managed to hit the both of them. “S’op fighting,” Fred mumbled. “It’s sleep time.”

“It’s morning Fred,” Lena said.

“No,” Fred mumbled.

Janus ignored them, turning back to his integration port to continue to keep plugging in phrases of interest, but he kept getting nothing.

“What are you doing?” Lena asked after a few moments of him huffing at his screen reader.

“Trying to do anything that may change our current living arrangements.”

She puffed out an amused breath. “Can I help?”

“Can you see any connection between these words and phrases?” he asked, pulling away his screen reader and tapping at the words he’d typed out.

“Paranoid, tonight, I live to party, comeback, love Bug, BB good, Mandy, Macy Misa, I believe, cool, that’s just the way we roll, burnin’ up,” she said. “What are these?”

“They’re things Pat said when we interrogated him that struck me funny,” Janus explained. “I feel like he was saying something more than what he said.”

“Hmm,” she said. “PTI for the first three?”

“Maybe,” Janus agreed, “but what about the rest of it? I feel like I’m missing something.”

“Millennia,” Remus mumbled from under his desk. Janus hadn’t been aware he was awake. “He said something something about it being the only time he could see the change of the millennia.” He turned his head to look at Janus. “Considering he’s a time traveler, that’s definitely a weird thing to say.”

“Millennia,” Janus contemplated. “A different turn of the millennia. Oh no.”

“What?” Lena asked.

Janus sighed, and rubbed his temple. “I know someone who studied the 1700-2200s.”

“Isn’t that good?”

“No,” Janus groaned, “because now I have to go talk to him.” He stood with a sigh and then paused. “How do I even get to Silver Mountains University without my timepiece?”

Luckily, Sliver Mountains ended up only being about an hour away from the TPI by time adherent travel, but considering Janus was used to his travel being instantaneous, it was an aggravating trip. He had to show ID and be buzzed up to the fourth floor since it was usually locked to everyone not traveling by timepiece or who worked in the office.

The receptionist was the same man as before. “I’m here to speak to Professor Eran,” Janus said.

The receptionist nodded. “He mentioned you asked to meet him but didn’t know when you’d arrive. He’ll be done teaching his class in about 5 minutes. You can wait over there.”

Janus nodded and sat, waiting for time to slowly tick by. Virgil arrived after a few minutes, lugging a giant bag with him. He caught sight of Janus and wordlessly jerked his head towards the hallway. Janus followed him.

“What’s in the bag?” Janus asked.

“Early 21st century cell phones,” Virgil replied, dropping it on his desk. “I let my students mess around with them for their lab.”

“I see,” Janus said.

“What did you need?” Virgil asked. “You said it was official business.”

“You’ve heard about the lockdown, I presume,” Janus said.

“Yeah, it really screws up my research schedule for the summer,” Virgil said.

“Do you know why the lockdown was instituted?” Janus asked. Virgil shook his head, so Janus explained briefly that they had been trying to find a timebomb on the eve of the year 3000, but it had been swiped by a free agent time traveler. “Some of the things he said seemed to be references to things that I couldn’t place, and I was wondering if you would recognize any.”

“Shoot,” Virgil requested, seeming intrigued by the prospect.

“Okay,” Janus said. “First, the alias he was using was Nick Jonas.” A weird expression crossed Virgil’s face immediately and Janus paused.

“You said the year 3000?” Virgil asked.

“Er. Yes.”

“Nick Jonas. Year 3000,” Virgil repeated with a snort. “Were Joe and Kevin a part of this too?”

Janus blinked. “Yes, how did you know that?”

“Yo-you’re going to have,” his sentence was broken by a giggle, and actual full-fledged giggle, “have to give me a minute.” With that, he sort of listed to the side and seemed to purposefully fall off his chair onto the floor under his desk.

Janus blinked and when he didn’t surface after a moment, he stood up to lean over the desk and look down at him. Virgil had his arm thrown over his beat red face, as he shook from what Janus thought was suppressed laughter.

“What?” Janus asked. “What’s wrong?”

“Just…” Virgil said, sobbing through his laughter. “Just tell me the things he said.”

“Er, mostly he just had weird inflections on words and phrases. There was ‘paranoid, tonight, I live to party, comeback…’”

“Wait, stop,” Virgil said. “Let me guess a few. That’s Just the Way We Roll, Burnin’ Up, Sucker.”

“The first two were, but not the last one.”

Virgil laughed. “Maybe the last one was just implied.”

Janus frowned down. “What are you talking about? What does this all mean?”

Virgil pulled himself out from under his desk and grabbed his bag of phones. He dug through it for a few seconds before pulling one out and handing it to Janus. “I have a lab for my students where they get preloaded phones from the early 21st century and are supposed to guess the demographics of the person who owns it. This one is an iPhone 3 meant to belong to a pre-teen to teenage girl from the year 2009. Look under music artists starting with the letter ‘J.’”

Confused, Janus scrolled through the old style phone, finding the music app and opening it easily. Upon getting to the ‘J’s, he immediately paused on an artist called the ‘Jonas Brothers.’ He clicked on it and read a few of the song titles. They weren’t all there, but…

“That rat bastard,” Janus said.

“Scroll to the bottom,” Virgil said. Janus did and found a song titled ‘Year 3000.’

“You’re kidding me.”

“Click on it,” Virgil requested.

Janus did, listening to the fairly standard pop song intro from the time period. It wasn’t until he got to the lyrics saying, ‘He told me he built a time machine’ that he cursed, understanding exactly what Pat had been doing. When the singer a few lines latter proclaimed that his neighbor said ‘I’ve been to the year 3000’ he almost smashed the artifact to pieces right then and there.

“I have no idea who this guy is,” Virgil said, “but he’s a comedic genius.”

Want to read more? Click below!

Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22  Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37

[ericsonclan]

The Words I Always Wanted to Say

Summary

Overall Word Count

Chapter 1: The day of the proposals arrives with neither member of the couple suspecting what's in store.

Aasim had felt like puking all day. It wasn’t the sort of mood he’d hoped to be in on the day of his proposal, but he knew deep inside that postponing it wouldn’t make him feel any better. He’d already rescheduled three times and each day that was supposed to be the day had brought the same queasiness. His nerves would get to him no matter what. He simply had to power through.

Still, if he waited a bit longer then maybe he could rethink the whole picnic aspect of the proposal and spare his stomach the struggle…. No. Clementine would kill Aasim if he told her he was moving back his plans again. She’d already given him enough grief about the ring he’d held onto for a year. If he rescheduled for a fourth time, Clem wouldn’t need to throw Aasim to the walkers. She’d bite off his head herself.

Walking toward the front of the courtyard, Aasim spotted the object of his affections, his one true love. Ruby was making conversation with Clementine, something about the weather and what they should do about the vegetable garden if things got too stormy. Clementine spotted Aasim coming their way and excused herself, giving Aasim a knowing look before walking off. She and Omar were going hunting today.

Ruby noticed Aasim coming toward her a moment later. Turning toward him with a smile, she started to speak just as he did.

“Do you-” Both of them paused, waiting for the other to speak but the silence lasted a moment too long and they both started again. “I wanted to ask-” They stopped again, chuckling at their timing.

“You go first,” Ruby said, waiting patiently.

Aasim cleared his throat, swallowing the lump in it before he spoke again. “I was thinking today would be lovely for a picnic. Are you free?”

Ruby’s brows furrowed slightly. “Well, actually, I had some work I needed to finish up in the greenhouse,”

“I can wait,” Aasim leaned back against the picnic table, trying his best to look casual.

“Actually, it could take a while. Maybe you’d like to join me?” A small smile played on Ruby’s lips.

“…No. We need to do the picnic. Now,”

“But you just said you could wait,”

“I-I lied!” Aasim could feel his face heating up. This was a terrible start. Maybe he should abort today’s proposal after all.

Just as Ruby was about to say something further though, Prisha’s hand appeared on Ruby’s shoulder. “It’s alright, Ruby. I can make sure everything is sorted out in the greenhouse. It’ll be ready for you once you’re done with your picnic,” She looked meaningfully into the redhead’s eyes till Ruby sighed and nodded.

“Alright. It can wait a bit longer, I guess,” Turning back to Aasim, she slipped her warm hand into his. “Now whereabouts did you say this picnic was?”

“If you’ll just follow me…” Aasim turned toward the admin building, his breathing gradually returning to normal. His heart however still beat a frantic staccato within his chest. As they walked, he looked down at his love. “I’m sorry if I was forceful back there. It wasn’t my intention,”

“I know,” Ruby gave her boyfriend’s hand a small squeeze, a soft smile on her face. “It’s sweet of you to put a surprise together for me. My plans can wait,”

“As soon as our picnic is done, I can head over to the greenhouse with you and help finish up whatever work needs to be done,”

“That’d be heavenly,” The sparkle in Ruby’s eyes set Aasim’s heart fluttering. He knew how much the greenhouse meant to her. And time spent together after the proposal, just the two of them, sharing kisses over the planters full of turnips and tubers, would be the perfect ending to what Aasim hoped would be a truly magical day.

Ascending the staircase within the admin building, the pair made their way to the headmaster’s office. Ruby looked round in mild confusion. “Are we grabbing snacks from here and then heading out?”

“Actually, I had a special spot in mind for our picnic today,” Aasim nodded toward the double doors that led out to the balcony. Ruby quirked an eyebrow then headed over to the closed doors. Opening them slowly, she gasped when she saw the spread set out before them.

A faded gingham picnic blanket held the treasure trove of treats Aasim had amassed in the last few weeks. A multi-tiered tea tray constructed out of welded pieces of scrap metal held a multitude of tiny sandwiches. Each was composed out of a pair of old saltines with various fillings in the center from sliced spam to stewed rabbit Omar had prepped in the fashion of pulled pork to garden veggie sandwiches with all manner of fresh vegetables nestled between the stale crackers. Beside the tea tray lay their three teapots, each chipped and broken but still retaining their original dignity and grace. The varied aromas drifting from them told Ruby they each held a different blend of tea. Their finest set of china was also stacked neatly to the side, ready for fine dining. A cracked porcelain container held a good portion of the sparse supply of sugar the group had stowed away accompanied by a small jar Ruby knew to be the last of their honey. A huge bouquet composed of various wildflowers gave the finishing touch to the romantic display.

“Oh, Aasim…” Ruby was at a loss for words as she took everything in.

Silently, Aasim wrapped his arms round Ruby and gently kissed her cheek as he hugged her from behind. “I wanted to put together a surprise worthy of you,”

“This is all too much! Why, if we use up the last of the sugar-”

“Then I’ll trade for more. Don’t worry, my dove. I always find a way,” Loosening his embrace, Aasim sat upon the picnic blanket and motioned for Ruby to do the same.

The two of them settled in for a decadent lunch, both of them eating their fill as the world went by around them, the clouds drifting lazily across the warm, sunny sky as the day went on. As Aasim poured another cup of chamomile tea for Ruby, he found himself lost for a moment in her bright blue eyes. He really could stay like this forever with her. And that’s exactly what this proposal meant: a promise of forever. Not just for things to stay the same but for them to build a future together. Feeling the panic rise within once more, Aasim did his best to keep his composure.

“Something bugging ya, Pookie?” Ruby looked at Aasim over the rim of her teacup as she took a sip.

“It’s nothing, my love,” Aasim paused for a moment, looking out at the courtyard below. Willy was on watch with AJ beside him. Both boys were chatting excitedly, clearly intrigued by something just beyond the walls. Likely a funny looking walker knowing those two. Louis and Violet were at the picnic benches, Louis mending a pair of pants while Violet worked on one of the rabbit hides she was in the process of tanning. Prisha had just emerged from the cellar with a box full of metal pipes balanced in her good arm, likely continuing her seemingly endless quest to restore the school’s plumbing. Turning back to Ruby, Aasim grinned. “Do you know why I chose the balcony for our picnic today?”

“The view?” Ruby mused, glancing through the repair section of the railing down at their friends below.

“That was certainly a factor, but not entirely the full reason. I wanted us to have our lunch up here in order to celebrate all we’ve accomplished. From up here you can see it all: the greenhouse, the vegetable garden, the paddock for Molly, Milky Way and Comet. Even a few years ago, we didn’t have any of those things. It shows how far we’ve come, and I think a primary factor in our success is each other. Together, you and I truly can accomplish anything, even returning a former wilderness to civilization,”

Ruby nodded, admiring their work along with Aasim. “We certainly have accomplished a lot these past few years. And that’s thanks in no small part to you. I don’t think anybody could compete with your work ethic, ‘Sim, not even me,”

“Oh, I doubt that,” Aasim turned back to Ruby, his eyes on her. “Perhaps it isn’t the most romantic thing to say, but one of the things that first drew me to you was seeing how hard you worked. Every day, rain or shine, without fail. At first I thought it was simply a matter of pride, as it is with me. But the longer I observed you, the more I realized why you really work so hard. It’s out of love. You work so that those you love can have better lives and I can’t think of anything nobler than that,”

“Sounds like you were watching me for quite some time,” Ruby looked down at the picnic blanket, her cheeks ruddier than usual. “Now that I think about it, I never asked you what the moment was that made you realize you were falling for me,”

“I don’t think it was any one moment. For a long time, I saw my admiration of you simply as mutual respect. But as the years went on, my feelings gradually shifted into something more. Seeing you grow from the girl who stole my pencil case on my first day at Ericson into such a beautiful, fiery woman of integrity and valor, I can’t remember when I crossed that line from liking to loving you. But I do know this, Ruby O’Donnel. I have loved you for a long, long time,”

Reaching into his pocket, Aasim pulled out the wedding ring. He’d spent the last few weeks polishing it night after night till it glowed with its original radiance once more. It was far too large for Ruby’s finger, likely a man’s ring before, but the beauty of the symbol was there nonetheless. Shifting so that he knelt with one knee forward just as he’d always seen it done in books and long-lost movies, Aasim held up the ring in both hands. “Ruby, my love, will you marry me?”

Ruby was quiet for a second. Then another. Aasim could feel his heart pounding in his ears as he held his pose wondering if someway, somehow, this had been the wrong move to make. Finally, Ruby broke the silence. “I want to show you something. Come with me,”

She could tell Aasim was nervous. Hell, she would be too if he’d left her high and dry after asking the question first. Ruby felt a twinge of guilt at leaving him so perplexed just for the sake of her pride, but she couldn’t say yes just yet. There was something she needed to do first, the very thing she’d been planning in the greenhouse before Aasim sprung the surprise picnic upon her. It wasn’t far to the greenhouse. Once they were there, he’d see why she’d brought him.

The courtyard was empty as they walked through it and the area surrounding the greenhouse too. Aasim looked more and more nervous with each step he took but followed Ruby willingly, obliging her when she opened the greenhouse door for him and motioned for Aasim to enter first. As soon as he did, Aasim let out a reverent gasp.

The entire greenhouse was aglow with candlelight. Mason jars of purple, red and green covered every inch of the space, lined up along the shelves, on the edges of planters, tucked along the sides of the walkways and even a few suspended above them. Some strands of twinkle lights also ran along the bases of the planters, bartered in a recent trade Aasim had been a part of. Flower petals were scattered over the ground, all leading to a central point before their feet. The petals there formed a simple message: I love you.

“Do you like it?” Ruby whispered, causing Aasim to turn round.

“Ruby, I… it’s glorious,” Aasim’s voice caught a bit, his eyes watering lightly.

“Now that you’ve seen it, I bet you’ve figured out why I wanted to go so badly to the greenhouse earlier today. And why I didn’t want to say yes just yet. Cause first I want to say my piece,” Clearing her throat, Ruby pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper from her pocket and began to read. “My love, I can’t remember the first time my eyes turned in your direction in that special way. I’d always thought you were cute, but considering that our early days started with me being more than a bit of a bully to ya, I never thought anything would come of that. Then the world fell apart and we were both so busy surviving I didn’t even let myself believe love was anywhere in my future.

But somewhere along the way, deep within my heart of hearts, I think I always wanted it to be you. Truth be told, our first kiss might have happened a couple days sooner if you’d just asked more politely. I’m happy with the way things ended up though. I’ll never forget our first kiss and I’ll never stop thanking the good Lord you came back to me that day.

This has been something I’ve wanted to do for a while. More than a while, probably from the very start. But I had all sorts of silly thoughts in my head that you had to be the one to propose first or it wouldn’t be proper. That was all a load of horse apples though. So, I put all this together to ask you a question, a question I hope you’ll answer the way I’ve been dreaming. Aasim…” Ruby paused, fishing something out of her pocket. Lifting it up, she revealed a tiny, glittery pink ring, so small it would probably only fit on Aasim’s pinky. “Will you marry me?”

“Yes! Yes!” Before either of them could say anything further, Aasim cupped Ruby’s face and pressed his lips to hers in a deep kiss. That kiss turned to another then another till finally Aasim pulled back and took the ring Ruby had offered. Slipping it as far down as it would go onto his pinky, Aasim held his hand out to admire it.

“Darn, it’s an even worse fit than I thought,” Ruby mumbled. “I’ve been searching all over God’s green earth for a proper ring of some sort and all I could scrounge up was this dress up ring I had from way back before the school even fell,”

“I love it,” Reaching toward the table behind her, Aasim grabbed a length of twine and the gardening shears and snipped off a portion of it. Slipping the ring onto the twine, he tied it around his neck, letting the ring rest just below the zipper on his hoodie. “Honestly, mine is probably an awful fit too. It’s embarrassing really,”

“Are you kidding? You propose with a bona fide gold ring while I use a cereal box prize and you’re acting as if it’s the same thing?” Ruby shook her head, taking the twine and scissors from him and cutting her own piece. Gingerly taking the ring from Aasim, Ruby looped it though the twine then tied it round her neck where it lay snugly just below the collar of her shirt.

The two of them smiled at each other, lost in the happiness of the moment before chuckles escaped their lips.

“I can’t believe it,” Aasim murmured, shaking his head. “For both of us to choose the exact same day… what are the odds? When you didn’t answer my proposal and brought me down to the greenhouse instead, I wasn’t sure what to expect, perhaps a rejection, but certainly not this.”

“Now that’s the silliest thing I ever heard!” Ruby exclaimed, lightly whacking her betrothed on the arm. “As if I’d ever say no to you! I just didn’t want you to steal my thunder!” Her eyes turned to the greenhouse, admiring the décor. “Thank goodness Prisha knew the last few pieces of the plan to get this greenhouse gussied up. I don’t know what would have happened without her help,”

“Prisha knew? She and Willy were the ones who made that tea tray for the picnic! She was in on both plans,” Aasim looked toward the door. “Was she the only one who helped you set this up?”

“Well, Louis was involved too. He was the first one I told about the proposal,”

“And if Louis knew then Clementine knew. Clem was the first one I confided in about the ring,”

The couple shared a look. How far did the others’ involvement go? The courtyard had suddenly been empty as they were heading toward the greenhouse. Was it still empty now? Hand in hand, the pair opened the door and stepped outside.

The courtyard was no longer empty after all. In fact, everyone was there. The others stood round one of the picnic tables, chattering excitedly. As soon as they saw Aasim and Ruby though, they suddenly went quiet. That was until AJ stepped forward.

“Happy wedding!” he shouted, tossing a handful of tinsel into the air. Willy joined him, throwing his own handful and blowing enthusiastically on an old kazoo.

“Boys, remember, it’s ‘happy engagement,’” Prisha corrected gently before her eyes returned to the happy pair. “Congratulations, you two. We couldn’t be happier for you,”

“It’s like I’m giving away my own children,” Louis commented, wiping a mock tear from his eye. “They grow up so fast,”

Clementine shook her head good-naturedly, taking Louis’ hand in hers. “Congratulations, both of you. Seeing as we all knew both your plans, we’ve been working on a little surprise of our own,”

“It’s PANCAKE DAY!” Willy shouted, jumping around ecstatically. Omar lifted up a plate of pancakes that had been hidden on the picnic benches, Violet holding a second plate. Both of them smiled at the happy couple.

Aasim and Ruby shared a smile of their own then stepped forward, joining the group for the celebratory feast. The day hadn’t gone how either of them had expected, yet it had blossomed into something more beautiful than they’d ever dreamed. As Ruby sat down at the picnic table, Aasim’s hand in hers, her family surrounding her, her cheeks glowed with excitement. “Let’s get to planning some weddings!”

[bangtan-madi]

Top Albums of 2020

I was tagged by the amazing @joonni to list my top nine twelve albums of 2020! This was honestly so hard, but so fun. I love any tags to do with music xD (Your music taste was amazing btw! Sorry I went a little crazy and did a few extra lol.) Thanks lovie 💓

I went with the albums that I loved as whole (aka I loved most, if not all, of the songs) and listened to the most this year. Some choices have deeper meanings, while others were just flat-out enjoyable. I also stuck with albums that came out this year only, but I wasn’t sure if that was inherently part of the challenge. I wasn’t too picky on the criteria, just went with the ones that made up the score for my 2020. All albums have Spotify links incase something catches your eye! (Apologies for my extra-ness; I added recommendations from each album and a brief...ish explanation as to why it made the list.)

Also, they’re in no particular order, because this was difficult enough...

Map of the Soul: 7 by BTS

Explanation — This album was my first comeback as part of the BTS Army. There are so many tracks that I adore, and I honestly can’t remember the last time I was so excited for music. It breathed life into my Spotify, it was the album I listened to the most this year, and Black Swan was my most listened song. The differing music genres that they played with, all the way from orchestral to trap to hip hop and synth pop, left me more and more excited as the songs progressed. If there was a #1 on this list, it would be MOTS:7.

Highlights — Interlude: Shadow, Black Swan, ON, We Are Bulletproof: The Eternal

Zero: Fever Part.1 by Ateez

Explanation — This was the soundtrack to my summer. I hadn’t heard much from Ateez, but what I had heard, I wasn’t a huge fan of? Maybe I hadn’t been grabbed yet, but oh boy. Zero: Fever definitely did that. Every track is such high energy and memorable, so it was so hard to pick favorites! I’ll always think back on this one for summer, and will be transported back to plenty of sunset commutes.

Highlights — Fever, Thanxx, One Day At A Time

The Dream Chapter: Eternity by Tomorrow x Together

Explanation — Until this mini album, I had only listened to TXT in passing. I liked their stuff, but I feel like this is where they really found their stride. TDC:E caught me totally off-guard, in the best way possible. To me at least, this one is a work of art. Each of the six tracks is so entrancing, and so different from each other while still working together as a cohesive story. And don’t even get me started on the MVs! This is an album that I listen to for feels and fun, which to me, TXT are just brilliant at. 

Highlights — Fairy of Shampoo, Maze in the Mirror, Eternally

Dystopia: The Tree of Language by Dreamcatcher

Explanation — It took me forever to find a girl group that I could really stan, like hardcore. This comeback for Dreamcatcher was when I realized they were it for me. This album in particular is so diverse. Their voices are both haunting and beautiful, and the way they interweave rock/alternative elements into their music has always turned my ear. They are so different from so many other girl groups out there, from the sound to their stage presence to their aesthetic. I will never stop talking about them, and this album really shows the best of their work thus far.

Highlights — Red Sun, Sahara, Paradise

BE by BTS

Explanation — How could BE not be on this list? What a perfect end to a shitty year. There’s something so comforting yet uplifting about this one, and I will happily admit I cried when I first heard Blue & Grey. Who am I kidding, I still do. There’s only one other artist I have listed on here with two albums, so BTS is in good company. What more is there to say other than BE was the warm hug we all needed.

Highlights — Life Goes On, Blue & Grey, Dis-ease, Stay

Heng:garae by Seventeen

Explanation — This is another group that I hadn’t listened to much before this album. I was so surprised and excited. Every song that passed, I found myself smiling more. Their voices are astoundingly beautiful, and the songs are sickeningly catchy. Another album that I go to just to have fun. It’s one of my favorites to just put on when a day is good, but doesn’t Seventeen make it a little better regardless?

Highlights — Fearless, Kidult, I Wish, Together

The Untamed by various

Explanation — If you’ve seen the Chinese drama The Untamed, then you know exactly why this is on there. This album is a collection of songs that are themes for the characters in the show, most of which are sung by the actors themselves. Let me tell you; I don’t know a lick of Mandarin, but these are some of the most stunning songs I’ve ever heard. It’s one of the things that drew me to the drama to begin with; everything, including the music, is breathtaking. The classical Chinese sound plays so well with the character’s stories and singer’s vocals. They tell stories all on their own and give the drama so much depth. Even if you’re not a fan of the show or webtoon it’s based on, give this one a listen. You won’t be disappointed!

Highlights — [Wen Qing] woodland, [Wen Ning] Chi Ni, [Lan Xichen] Bu You, [Jiang Yanli & Jin Zixuan] Yong Ge, [Interlude] Yi Nan Ping, [Nie Minghao & Nie Huaisang] Qing He Ju

Humanity (Chapters I & II) by Thomas Bergersen

Explanation — If you know anything about me, you know how important orchestral music is to me. It’s been a huge part of my music journey ever since I was in middle school. Thomas Bergersen has been my favorite composer for years; the way he integrates the classical with the modern is just...there are no words. These two albums cannot be listed separately; they’re part of a seven-part project titled Humanity. Chapters I & II came out in 2020, and honestly, I have no words. The way he tells a story through almost entirely lyric-less work is just immaculate. I’ve never felt more powerful, emotional, or inspired than when listening to these two. I cried when I first heard Your Imagination and Materialize. No matter how I am feeling, whether I need inspiration or hope or just some peace of mind, I go here. I’ve never felt more healed than when listening to his work. If you take a chance to listen to anything on this list, PLEASE. Give these a try. 

Highlights — We Are One, Wings, Humanity, Your Imagination, Materialize, Innocence, The Stars Are Coming Home

Brightest Blue by Ellie Goulding

Explanation — I don’t listen to a ton of western music that isn’t orchestral or lofi, but I used to adore Ellie Goulding. Halcyon was my entire teen-hood. When I saw she came out with a new album this year, I gave it a listen for sentimentality reasons. And boy, I still love her. Her voice is both angelic and haunting, and her sound is so unique. The messages given in these songs are powerful, potent, a tad bit bittersweet, and especially valid for young women navigating adult life. Also the instrumentals backing her vocals are often big and grand and symphonic, filled with piano and violin. That’s enough to get me to listen. And to top it all off, the collabs she has on this album are so fitting for each track, it’s absolutely beautiful.

Highlights — Start, Cyan, Ode To Myself, Woman, Flux, Overture, Slow Grenade, Hate Me

Beneath Your Waves by Sleepy Fish

Explanation — If there’s one kind of music that shuts off the little anxiety bug in my brain and gets me to work, one that isn’t as intense as orchestral music and that doesn’t put me into sensory overload like orchestral sometimes does, it’s lofi. And Sleepy Fish does it so freakin’ well. This album that came out this year is one of my most often repeated over and over. When I’m struggling with sensory issues at work, I put this one repeat and my mind just...goes...quiet. It’s like medicine. And the tunes are so catchy and sweet. I’m instantly transported to someplace magical, some seaside city straight out of a Ghibli film, and far away from the things that are troubling me. Then I can finally get some work done, get to sleep, or just quiet my mind. If you struggle with sensory issues or anxiety like I do, give this album a shot. Also, the album titled My Room Becomes The Sea from 2019 is excellent.

Highlights — Velocities, Sunbreak, Swimming, Nights Like These, Winter Winter

WOOPS! by Woodz

Explanation — Another mini album that is just a blast to listen to, but it also has such a soft side that hits me in the feels. I don’t see a lot of people talking about Woodz, but you all should give him a listen. He’s so talented, and his voice on this one is just *chef’s kiss* everything. The mixing is also impeccable and pairs so well with his vocals.

Highlights — Bump Bump, On my own, Sweater, Tide

D-2 by Agust D

Explanation — I mean, we all knew this one was gonna be dope. Yoongi did not disappoint. This mixtape is so different from most of the stuff I listen to, but I absolutely adored it. The truth and rhythm and pure talent in each and every verse stuns me still. I find myself especially drawn to this one when I’m frustrated (not exclusively, but often, ‘cause 2020.) Both his truth and sound give me a safe place to feel that frustration and anxiety and vent/work through it. I don’t know what it is about Yoongi, but to me, all of his work is like a comforting friend going, “Hey, you’re totally valid and okay for feeling this way...but it sucks, doesn’t it?” 

Highlights — Daechwita, People, Dear my friend

Now, I’ll tag these lovely people! Only if you wanna :)

@kooala​ @cultleaderyoongi​ @yoontopia​ @hobicomeholla29​ @helenazbmrskai​ @moon-write​ @dreamcatcherjiah​ @ditttiii​

[megucarecord]

Rating Genshin Impact Character Designs (Pt. 1)

Hey y’all! I’ve been thinking of doing this for a really long time and I decided to finally stop being lazy and do it. So this is going to be a review of all the playable characters in Genshin Impact from a design perspective. I don’t really have any prerequisites to make this list worth anything (unless you count one year of a fashion/sewing class in high school lol) but hey idk, seems fun?

Gonna be super long (10 characters) so putting everything under the cut.

Disclaimer: I don’t actually hate any of these designs, nor do I consider my opinions “fixing” them, this is just for fun. 

Character: Lumine

I have a lot of conflicting feelings about this design. The hair and basic build are fine, very generic but that’s unsurprising for any character that is working at least partially as a pseudo self-insert. The color scheme is also very bland - and is one of the reasons I originally thought that Aether was automatically Geo traveler and Lumine was Anemo traveler. I think that adding more colors would’ve been a good thing, but also would’ve required a revamp of the dress itself, so maybe not the most practical thing, even if I think the dress is a bit too busy. The biggest changes I would make would be to get rid of the fancy part of her stockings as well as the extra flow/ruffled back of the skirt, which is just a bit too much considering the top layer of the skirt is already quite detailed (in a very nice way) and that could’ve just been extended. I also have to admit that though the scarf is very impractical and showy, but it reminds me of a costume from a series I like so I actually like it a lot, although you could definitely term it unnecessary.

Rating: 7/10

Character: Aether

Okay ngl this character design kinda slaps. Firstly, I love that Aether has long hair, it’s a good contrast to Lumine’s cut (and contrast should be super important with characters that are siblings/parallels of one another) and idk long braids are kinda cool. I love that the outfit has distinctive colors, which give the character personality and keeps him from being washed out. The design is much more streamlined than Lumine’s, and although I’m not a huge fan of midrifts (a theme in this post I’m sorry) there’s not actually much I’d change in this design. Except maybe make the cape a scarf to better match with Lumine. This is definitely the superior design in terms of the siblings in my opinion and I think the lack of intricacy fits the image of “traveler” better. It’s not my favorite and there isn’t anything that really stands out in the design, but it’s really solid and I like it.

Rating: 9/10

Character: Albedo

This design has a lot of potential, but I think in the end it’s just a bit too busy (which will be a theme in this game haha). I like the hair - in general I’m glad Genshin isn’t scared to try a bunch of different lengths and styles on guys because if not everything would become painfully boring. I also like the clothes for the most part. The boots are especially sleek, and I like that despite being a Geo character they gave Albedo a bluer, darker color scheme. I think it fits with his mysterious sort of quietly menacing vibe (this man is Frankensteining something I know it). But it really starts to get a bit too much with the coat. I think he needed a coat, again it fits the character, he’s in the middle of a frozen tundra and he’s also a magic scientist man, he needs some sort of coat. But I think the chain and the strap across the front is a bit too much. If I were the designers I would’ve continued with a sleeker theme, make the sleeves longer, the gloves shorter, if you wanted some ornamentation maybe a pack of vials on his belt. Overall very good design, greater color scheme, too busy. Also can we appreciate his banner art? It’s so good I love it.

Rating: 8/10

Character: Amber

Okay first I’m gonna say her card art is super cute. Love the pose, love the style. All gut. Now let me say that this outfit had potential but then it sorta... fell flat. I like the color scheme for the most part, except the white cause idk white is boring and in the game it looks kinda latexy, but I understand wanting three colors and black might be too close to brown. That being said, I hate stockings. Stockings are just the worst, they’re impractical, hard to put on, uncomfortable, should only be worn with dresses. No knight of Favonius needs stockings. Might I suggest pants or shorts? Or like cool pseudo armor plates like with Lumine. Also though I do like the jacket and the leather stomacher design, I think a bomber jacket might suit the character better, because idk they’re cool and they make me think of Amelia Earheart, although that’s such a culturally distinct thing I can’t blame them for not thinking that way. Again the jacket is still very cool, love the stomacher, and love the cuffs.. The belt is lovely and like I said love the embossed designs, but ultimately this design is too impractical, and too bland to get away with being impratical for me. So... yeah.

Rating: 5/10

Character: Barbara

Barbara! Our fav crazy nun. First I’m gonna thank her for having an attack of pure magic then I’m gonna say I hate the color white apparently because I also didn’t like it here. I’m pretty sure she’s supposed to be a novice (could be wrong), so I’d flip the colors, have the accents be white and the main color navy. But idk that’s just me. Overall I quite like her design. It’s a pretty good balance between simple and detailed. I don’t even hate the stockings. I’d say the least good part is the top, the bow and the weird collar is just... ehh? but I don’t think getting rid of the collar would help though. I’d say ditch the bow, make the dress connect to the collar, keep the off the shoulders cold sleeves. I really like the ruffled part of the top skirt. Idk it’s the best part of the design. The hat makes her look like a nurse not a nun though. maybe make the hair ties for the ponytails little veils, might fit better. Overall mostly nitpicks, it’s a strong design.

Rating: 8/10

Character: Beidou

Firstly I’d like to apologize to the Beidou I pulled before never using her (forgive me ily); next I’d like to admit I don’t love her design. I haven’t really harped on the lack of armor on these characters - because I’m not sure how I’d integrate armor into all them without making them bland af, no one wants people running around in full plate armor how tf you supposed to climb in that - but I still wouldn’t’ve put her in a leotard and boots only when she’s a canonical fighter, without even the armor accents on most of the other character. I know that traditional qipao would probably be terrible to fight in, so I’m not going to complain about them slitting it - I actually quite like it I think it’s cool and sleek and fits her vibe - but I will complain about them putting her in a leotard underneath. As someone who dances I can assure you no one in their right mind would want to fight in a leotard, which yes I know isn’t the point and I can’t blame them for not thinking that way. Anyways, I think leggings/stockings and tall boots are quite cool so that’s prolly what I’d do, streamlines the whole design too, gives it a sense of connectivity (idk I’m weird and I don’t look at this character often so yeah). I like the top of her design, although I’d prolly replace the fur on the cap with a large collar, sort of pirate-y or Navy-like. Also let me just say I love the hair and eye patch. Fits her reckless sort of character to hate her hair whipping around, and the eyepatch really sells the concept of her having fought for years. The hand guards didn’t need to be flared, but I don’t mind them being there. Especially since handling a Claymore would definitely rip up your hands if you didn’t have protection. Also the boots though impractical are very cool so... yeah.

Rating: 6/10

Character: Bennett

One of my main team and prolly the closest thing I currently have to a DPS I have conflicting opinions on Bennett’s design. I think it’s a pretty good design all things considered. His belt and all his packs would be busy if you didn’t know Bennett’s character, but considering he’s a wanna be adventurer, I think it works pretty well. Although I don’t know why his extra belt straps are so long... or even exist?? Idk kinda weird. His top is... ehh? I don’t really like it, I think partially because I don’t think Bennett would wear a midrift shirt like this (midrifts where there shouldn’t be midrifts or, as I like to call it, being MagiReco-d) and partially cause the color, though understandable in such a busy design, is kinda bland. I think that’s why the collar works instead of being too busy, we needed some color. If I had to changed the design I’d get rid of the midrift and get rid of those weird extra belt things. Also that one random dagger star thing on one side of his blue collar is just so weird and random and like why does it exist? But overall I like the design, and it doesn’t bug me when I’m playing with him. I think it’s a good example of how busyness can accurately portray a character. Well done.

Rating: 8/10

Character: Chongyun

Another character who I own but have never played, though my friend has him on their main team and they look super cool. I’m not gonna lie I love this character’s design. Firstly the color palette is so good, the white feels like it works to offset all the blue hues - which I love that even the darkest parts of his design are blue not black - so it doesn’t feel bland or irritating, especially with the gold giving it a sense of luxury. I also like the choice to have a tunic that extends to the pants, I think having only white pants would be too bland - again white it a meh color for designs - so it really gives it some necessary details and color. I also like the jacket, again it gives the design a sense of detail while being simple enough not to feel like too much. Also I have no idea what the outfit would look like without the jacket and I have a feeling that answer would be Not Good, so... yeah. Some nitpicks; the left arm band thingie golden cuff is kinda too much and seems impractical and irritating. And... that’s it. I know the slippers are impractical, but I think they work, he is an exorcist not an adventurer after all. Overall, probably second favorite design in the game. Great job

Rating: 10/10

Character: Diluc

Give Diluc a high ponytail, I’m begging you. Lol anyways personal preference aside (which is impossible this entire post is personal preference) I like this design. I think the color works and the whole outfit is a good reflection of Diluc’s character, closed off, luxurious while also a bit ragged and uncontrollable. Yeah. I like it. I do think the thing chain accessory is kinda random, and I don’t think there’s anything about the design that knocks me off my feet, but I do really love the design overall. Also the gloves, good gloves. Suggestions? High ponytailed Diluc. Nothing else. Also though he’s not in this post I like that this outfit is very streamlined and simple compared to Kaeya, it’s a good portrayal of their differing views and opinions through fashion. Because unlike with the traveller siblings I think these brothers have a dynamic where contrast is better than parallel.

Rating: 9/10

Character: Diona

Okay so though I’ve never interacted with this character I skimmed the wiki and I love her backstory it’s hilarious. Also since I never interact with her I don’t have many opinions about her design except why does she only have one sock on? Honestly relatable moments. I think the extra ponytail is kinda weird and excessive considering the hat and I’d prolly make the hair orange to match the ears but overall very cute design. What do bartenders look like? Idk. Oh and also there are a bit too many colors roaming around, but I get it. Overall fairly generic but kinda cute. I still think midrifts are bad.

Rating: 7/10

And that’s it! I hope this didn’t come off as “lol these designs are gross and I’m superior and we should fix them” because no. No one should take any of these suggestions seriously. Except maybe the ponytail one lol. Anyways I hope at least one person likes this cause this took forever and I kinda burned out after a while. Next post if I make it will be interesting cause it includes my least favorite design. May you all have lovely playing and if you love a design I don’t honestly more power to you. Bye!!

[electronicdelusionstarlight]

We need to talk about Project AHO

Project AHO is a DLC sized quest mod for Skyrim. It has 6500+ endorsement, and almost 118K unique downloads, and promises to add a hidden Telvanni settlement, 40+ new locations, 20+ fully voiced NPCs, new perks, new weapons, a new house, all dwemer or telvanni themed, and a non linear main quest with more than 12 side quests added in.

It's also, to use a particularly abused word as of late, fucking problematic.

The Mod Page doesn't mention many details about the mod, but it sure loves to point out how complex and varied the NPCs AI is, almost like real people with real moralities and real routines.

Anyway, Due to probably a bug (Mod is not supposed to not start till level 15) and the fact the abandoned prison is close to the place where you can trigger the mod, I barelly started a new Skyrim game and gotten Kaidan as we got out of prison together, before I was REMINDED FORCIBLY just why I couldn't stand this mod in the first place back in 2018.

So, small nitpick first: the game (should) suggest you at level 15 to free your followers before going to Mixwater Mill since they may cause bugs if they are mixed in the mod. This is bad for roleplaying reason since why would you logically decide to go there alone (want to buy some wood for your new house and you want to surprise them, so they wait you home?), but I would get beyond it if the rest of the Mod hadn't been... about that.

That being said, here's the meat of the issue:

If you reach the Mill after level 15, possibly with no follower, a Orc will approach you. Exiting his dialogue will only trigger the end of the scene early, he's essential, and whatever you do, whatever happens, whatever you say to him about his quest, what happens next is unavoidable.

He starts to hype you up with Trinimac and Daggerfall lore, which got me pretty excited at first when I played the mod for the first time, since, again, they only mentioned this being about a Hidden Telvanni settlement built over a Dwemer Ruin in the rift, so I thought the mod was going to be about the Boethia - Triminac Vore and Scat party that gave us the Dunmer and the Orcs, at least tangentially, so I go for the excited, eager to help dialogue route with him as he talks about epic quests and shit, except after we reach the last line, he goes something like "actually, this was all a diversion for having my mates sneak behind you and knock you out."

You are knocked out. No one can help you, you can do nothing to stop it, you can't even fight or talk or teleport your way out of it. It's scripted and it's unavoidable.

Next thing you know, you wake up in a cramped cell in prisoners rags, a mind control amulet at your neck, and 4 other prisoners.

Which is when the slave auction starts.

Project AHO is a mod about slavery. Is a mod about the Last Dragonborn, away from their loved ones, is tricked, ambushed and captured by a secret settlement of Telvanni wizards, before getting sold at a fucking slave auction.

And then, after all is said and done, after you’ve literally getting enslaved by Neloth 2.0, forced to fulfill tasks for him as the game, very pointedly, tries to make you empathize with this FUCKING SLAVERS via side quests (Oh, the daughter of the local hunter wants to travel the world and have adventures, and you can have a nice and friendly pint of beer with the fucking SLAVE CATCHER that captured you, and you meet another slave who didn’t get his tongue cut out, unlike most of the other ones in the bloody place, how nice, how fucking human of them), the game has the fucking AUDACITY to have the fucking leader of the settlement free you (not out of anything, but because your master is doing shady shit on the side and has kicked you out of his mansion after the last task), and then go, after you understandably ask why the FUCK shouldn’t you burn the place to the ground: “Oh, but slavery is such an important and integral part of our culture and economy, we dunmer will never change and will always have slaves so why should you bother, you are free now!”

This mod. In a escapist fucking game such as Skyrim. Is bad. Is REALLY bad.

Even putting aside the obvious lore reasons (Morrowind abolished slavery 200+ years ago under House Hlaalu, and even if they lynched them for it they are STILL not having slavery today), or the whole “Ah, the empire and the thalmor and the stormcloak know about this and they support us behind the scenes, in fact some of them partecipated at the auction you were on, there is a prosperous slave trade all over Tamriel!” bullshit, the whole thing is:

1) IN POOR FUCKING TASTE.

2) SERIOUSLY, WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO PLAY THIS? SLAVE SIMULATOR FOR HALF THE QUEST MOD, GO DO MINDLESS FETCH QUESTS FOR YOU MASTER, YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DO ANYTHING BY YOURSELF, YOU HAVE TO CLEAN THE CELL OF ANOTHER SLAVE THAT COULDN’T SURVIVE HIS EXPERIMENTS, THIS IS FUCKING BAD.

3) THE FUCKING... MIND CONTROL AMULET ROBBING YOU OF ANY AGENCY? YOU CANNOT KILL NOR ATTACK NOR DO ANYTHING TILL YOU REMOVE IT AND YOU CAN’T REMOVE IT TILL HALF THE GAME SO WHAT WAS PRESENTED AS A “NON LINEAR MAIN QUEST” IS ACTUALLY A RAILROADED BULLSHIT TOWARD A MAJOR CHOICE BETWEEN RAZING THE SETTLEMENT TO THE GROUND WITH A SPACESHIP OR LETTING THE SETTLEMENT BE (YOU KNOW, CLASSIC BETHESDA MORAL DILEMMA, EXCEPT THE SETTLEMENT IS FILLED WITH SLAVERS AND SLAVES)

Which is sad because the aesthetic and some of the shit added to this are pretty cool overall, there is a “Dwemer Chess Board” thing that is missing some pieces that you can collect through the settlement and after you get them all and place them on the board you get a perk on team fighting, which would be a nice thing to have in a mod if it wasn’t for, again, the FUCKING SLAVERY!

Like, fuck, just imagine the slave auction:

Scripted scene, you can’t do anything, you are marched with the other slaves to a stage, the orc guy is the auction master, he sells:

1) The first slave, a vampire, to your future master.

2) Then an argonian young woman (”Plucked fresh from the windhelm docks” they say, and they sell her to some noble dude as his “new handmaiden,” which is SO FUCKING CREEPY ON SO MANY LEVELS LIKE... Even if you put aside the prospect of knowing her from the docks both in and out of universe (There is a potential Argonian spouse at the windhelm docks after all), this is bad? SO SO FUCKING BAD? BY ALL POSSIBLE ANGLES?)

3) Then they can’t sell a 50 year old argonian dude so they go “remove lot number 3 from the auction blog) and they gut him right in front of me??? By then going “he’ll make a good purse” because HOLY FUCK?????

4) Then you get sold in a auction battle between Neloth 2.0 but shittier and the local blacksmith, both locals (this, again, after mentioning that if you get sold to a local they’ll cut your tongue out), and you then get sold to Neloth 2.0 but shittier...

You can’t fucking stop any of this. You can’t do a “destroy the dark brotherhood” questline, you can’t prevent the kidnapping, even if you go out the city, some dumb magic will stop you from revealing its location to the competent authorities, who, again, are actually in cahoots with the slavers, so it’s not like they’d help!

And the mod clearly tries to make you, again, empathize and understand the fucking SLAVERS and their fucking position as SLAVERS like some BULLSHIT because fucking CENTRISM or some shit and REALLY?

So... to end this shit: Project AHO? Is some sort of weird, borderline feticistic mod about dunmers still being slavers and fucking rolling with it. It breaks canon and lore (after presenting itself as a mod that explores and faithfully depicts the lore), has a very railroady main quest after, again, mentioning its non linear path, and, agAIN, TRIES REALLY HARD TO MAKE YOU EMPATHIZE WITH THOSE BASTARDS.

So, I give it a 2 BB8s out of 10 for the dumb star wars reference companion, if you want to play it be fucking warned by its content.